Latest / Carmedy / Episode #6 - Gratitude

Transcript

Episode #6 - Gratitude · Carmedy

0:00
SPEAKER_00: What's up everyone?
0:01
SPEAKER_00: Welcome to the Comedy Podcast, where comedy meets you or slash my commute.
0:05
SPEAKER_00: I am your host, Dave Thompson.
0:08
SPEAKER_00: Welcome.
0:09
SPEAKER_00: This is episode number six.
0:12
SPEAKER_00: Thank you so much for being here.
0:15
SPEAKER_00: I love you.
0:16
SPEAKER_00: You're wonderful.
0:17
SPEAKER_00: I am grateful for you.
0:19
SPEAKER_00: I am grateful.
0:22
SPEAKER_00: I was thinking a lot.
0:24
SPEAKER_00: I was doing some self-reflection.
0:26
SPEAKER_00: You ever do self-reflection and you're just like, wow, I suck?
0:32
SPEAKER_00: You know?
0:33
SPEAKER_00: Sometimes I feel that way.
0:34
SPEAKER_00: Sometimes I feel like, wow, you suck.
0:36
SPEAKER_00: And I'm not just talking about at comedy.
0:38
SPEAKER_00: Sometimes you suck at life.
0:41
SPEAKER_00: You know?
0:42
SPEAKER_00: Other times you might have a big win, or or maybe you've seen the growth of yourself personally.
0:47
SPEAKER_00: And then those days are good.
0:49
SPEAKER_00: And then other days you look and you're like, wow, I suck.
0:55
SPEAKER_00: And uh so yeah, I've been doing a lot of self-reflection.
0:58
SPEAKER_00: I've just been thinking about that word.
0:59
SPEAKER_00: I've been thinking about that word gratefulness.
1:01
SPEAKER_00: Gratefulness.
1:03
SPEAKER_00: And I gotta say, you guys, I'm I'm grateful for a lot of things.
1:07
SPEAKER_00: You know, I'm I'm I'm grateful for my family.
1:10
SPEAKER_00: I'm grateful for God.
1:11
SPEAKER_00: I'm grateful for uh being able to make money.
1:14
SPEAKER_00: I'm grateful for comedy.
1:15
SPEAKER_00: I'm grateful for a lot of people in the scene that do comedy.
1:18
SPEAKER_00: I'm very grateful.
1:19
SPEAKER_00: Uh I'm very grateful that I have listeners of this podcast.
1:24
SPEAKER_00: That there's more than one person, just my mother, more than one person that listens to my pod.
1:30
SPEAKER_00: Thank you.
1:31
SPEAKER_00: You guys are wonderful.
1:33
SPEAKER_00: I'm very grateful for you.
1:34
SPEAKER_00: That that really pushes me forward to be like, hey, there's people that enjoy listening to what you have to say and enjoy hearing your perspective, and uh don't be a weenie about it and be grateful and uh be kind to other people and uh just do your thing.
1:52
SPEAKER_00: And I'm trying to focus on that.
1:54
SPEAKER_00: You know, I do feel like sometimes I get in my head and it's easy to think about what other people have going on or think about other opportunities people are getting or whatever, but man, I do want to just be grateful uh for what I got.
2:10
SPEAKER_00: Yeah, I put a lot of pressure on myself.
2:11
SPEAKER_00: You know, I've I've only been doing this for just under two years, you know?
2:18
SPEAKER_00: To to have done what I've done already is definitely above the norm.
2:24
SPEAKER_00: And I'm I'm grateful for the opportunities I've had to perform at clubs, to open for for certain comics, to to get as many shows as I do, and to to help produce the shows that I that I help with, and to also produce my own shows.
2:40
SPEAKER_00: I'm I'm I'm I'm thankful.
2:42
SPEAKER_00: I'm grateful.
2:42
SPEAKER_00: So if you've ever participated in an IE comedy show, if you've ever participated in uh a heat wave comedy show, uh any of that.
2:53
SPEAKER_00: So thank you so much.
2:54
SPEAKER_00: Whether it's a repost or a flyer or you listen or whatever.
2:58
SPEAKER_00: Just want to say thank you.
2:59
SPEAKER_00: You're wonderful.
3:00
SPEAKER_00: It means so much to see these numbers um of people listening and to see the messages um that that y'all send me and the reposts and stuff.
3:11
SPEAKER_00: Ed, freaking shout out.
3:12
SPEAKER_00: Love that guy, Ed, Daniel, Alec, all the homies that be that be reposting stuff.
3:18
SPEAKER_00: Thank you guys so much.
3:19
SPEAKER_00: You guys are wonderful.
3:20
SPEAKER_00: Um, there is more of you, but I just uh sometimes I forget off the top of my head.
3:25
SPEAKER_00: So I'm so sorry.
3:26
SPEAKER_00: Uh let's talk about I.e comedy.
3:29
SPEAKER_00: Let's talk about it.
3:31
SPEAKER_00: So I I kind of opened that up in January, and now here I am, four months later.
3:36
SPEAKER_00: And would love to give some thoughts about it.
3:39
SPEAKER_00: So I'm very excited for the IE comedy festival.
3:42
SPEAKER_00: I've been very busy, hard at work to secure venues and to try and get funding for the festival.
3:49
SPEAKER_00: Uh, have yet to secure any sponsors as of yet, but I'm not gonna stop trying because I really do believe in this uh project.
3:58
SPEAKER_00: I know it's very bold, it's a lot of shows, it's a lot of comics, but I think it is worth it.
4:08
SPEAKER_00: I think that all of the work that I put into it, whether sponsors help me or not, is is not gonna be in vain because our community needs to laugh, and there is so many of us here, and uh giving ourselves an opportunity to to go in all of these different areas from Palm Springs, Riverside, Redlands, Temecula, and everything in between is is a really really cool thing.
4:34
SPEAKER_00: So I'm very excited about that.
4:36
SPEAKER_00: Uh, overall, as far as uh my IE comedy shows, uh right now I'm booking at the Above the Iron Comedy Club in Menapee.
4:45
SPEAKER_00: Shout out Frank Martin, shout out that guy.
4:50
SPEAKER_00: Um, I'm also booking uh out of Joshua Tree up at the Z Club.
4:57
SPEAKER_00: If you've never been there, definitely gotta come check it out.
4:59
SPEAKER_00: It's a really, really cool space.
5:00
SPEAKER_00: I've been up there booking for almost a year now, just about to be a year, and uh that's a that's a wonderful place to have, and I'm very thankful and grateful for that place.
5:11
SPEAKER_00: Uh and then just for all of the people that have come out, just really quick, for all the people have come out.
5:17
SPEAKER_00: If any of you listen to this pod, if you've come out to any of my IE comedy shows or those heat wave shows and stuff, thank you guys so much.
5:26
SPEAKER_00: I mean, the last heat wave comedy tour that I had with my friends, we had over 200 people show up to our shows.
5:34
SPEAKER_00: We didn't even have we had less than 10 shows on the tour, and we had over 200 people come to the shows, and that is just amazing.
5:43
SPEAKER_00: So, thank thank you all so much.
5:45
SPEAKER_00: That's incredible.
5:46
SPEAKER_00: Um, but yeah, stay comedy shows uh pushing forward.
5:50
SPEAKER_00: I really would love to build this brand in a way that's beneficial, um and and and really recognizable for our community, and and to have local comedians on and to invite uh other comedians from other scenes to to see just how incredible our community and our area is over here.
6:12
SPEAKER_00: Uh, it really is a group effort to really is a group effort to be able to kind of make this stuff happen.
6:21
SPEAKER_00: And uh if you guys ever want to help out, like doing sound at a at a show or you you know kind of helping out with hosting or anything like that, uh I I would love it.
6:33
SPEAKER_00: I I know I host most of the shows, um, but if there's ever anyone in particular that wants to try out hosting or anything like that, hit me up.
6:42
SPEAKER_00: Let me know.
6:42
SPEAKER_00: There's definitely an opportunity I could I could I could do a show where maybe I'm just on the show featuring instead of just doing hosting.
6:50
SPEAKER_00: Um or if you want to help out with the audio and the music and all that stuff, definitely let me know.
6:55
SPEAKER_00: I'd be interested in discussing it with you.
6:57
SPEAKER_00: Uh other things.
6:59
SPEAKER_00: Oh my goodness, comedy, comedy, comedy, comedy.
7:02
SPEAKER_00: So funny.
7:02
SPEAKER_00: Netflix is a joke festival.
7:04
SPEAKER_00: Wow, I was there night one, night one, and I saw some incredible, talented, famous, funny individuals.
7:16
SPEAKER_00: Let me tell you something.
7:18
SPEAKER_00: Um on my vlog, I recorded a little, and I wish I would have recorded more, but it just feels weird when there's like famous people around you, and there's people out in the parking lot tarking at the comedy store, and and and then you're like pulling your camera out.
7:39
SPEAKER_00: It just feels really like kind of gross, you know.
7:42
SPEAKER_00: I'm saying it feels very paparazzi, feels very kind of like iff.
7:47
SPEAKER_00: So I didn't really do very much of that.
7:48
SPEAKER_00: I I wish it wouldn't be like that, but it is all the yawns hitting me freaking today.
7:57
SPEAKER_00: I'm so sorry, you guys.
7:58
SPEAKER_00: Please don't yawn while you're driving.
8:00
SPEAKER_00: Um, but yes, the festival so far has been incredible.
8:04
SPEAKER_00: The vibes were super high, even just the networking with people, just seeing everybody at the store late at night.
8:11
SPEAKER_00: You know, I stayed out till like almost 3 a.m.
8:14
SPEAKER_00: And it was amazing just getting to talk with people, and I booked a few people, and a few people booked me on stuff, and it's just really cool to be able to be there with everybody, just kind of witness this amazing moment uh of all these different shows coming together.
8:29
SPEAKER_00: Uh, tonight is the Kill Tony open mic that I'm hosting at Above the Iron to help get people ready and get people confident for their one-minute sets tomorrow at Kill Tony at the Intuit Dome in Englewood.
8:45
SPEAKER_00: So I'm very excited about that.
8:47
SPEAKER_00: I think that's gonna be really, really cool.
8:49
SPEAKER_00: I will say one thing that I am concerned about, that I am concerned about, is how early are they gonna want us to get there tomorrow?
8:59
SPEAKER_00: Like, is it gonna be like, oh, show up at 2 p.m.?
9:02
SPEAKER_00: Because I gotta work.
9:03
SPEAKER_00: You know what I'm saying?
9:04
SPEAKER_00: Like, I do want to do Kill Tony, but I also have to feed myself.
9:10
SPEAKER_00: I got a family to feed, you know, got all those got all those people depending on me.
9:17
SPEAKER_00: You know what I'm saying?
9:18
SPEAKER_00: You dig, word.
9:20
SPEAKER_00: I love that.
9:22
SPEAKER_00: Uh, more things about comedy.
9:23
SPEAKER_00: Uh I've been thinking about writing.
9:25
SPEAKER_00: I've been thinking about writing.
9:27
SPEAKER_00: As I've been writing stuff, sometimes I do the you know morning pages um where you're writing stuff first thing in the morning when you wake up.
9:34
SPEAKER_00: Uh sometimes late at night when I go to bed, I'll think of something.
9:37
SPEAKER_00: Last night I thought of something funny and I wrote it down.
9:40
SPEAKER_00: And I don't know if it's gonna be funny.
9:42
SPEAKER_00: I don't know if it's just uh maybe something in my own head, which sometimes I don't know if you guys can relate where there's just something so funny you're thinking of in your head, and then it goes to the stage, and then it just completely bombs, and nobody sympathizes with you, and you're just like, no, no, we're good, and I was just like, Alright, I'm sorry I said it.
10:07
SPEAKER_00: I'm sorry I s I'm sorry I even mentioned it.
10:10
SPEAKER_00: I'm sorry I'm here.
10:13
SPEAKER_00: Don't be afraid to bomb.
10:15
SPEAKER_00: I've done it a million times, and I'll do it a million more, a couple million more.
10:19
SPEAKER_00: Wonderful, but yes, talking about comedy.
10:22
SPEAKER_00: Uh writing.
10:22
SPEAKER_00: There's some things I've been thinking about writing, um, related to my growing up, related to me being homeschooled, related to me not being able to get my dream job.
10:38
SPEAKER_00: My dream job, you guys, ladies and gentlemen, listen up real quick, okay?
10:43
SPEAKER_00: Okay, everybody in the car, pay attention.
10:46
SPEAKER_00: My dream job when I was a child, when I was a young, young child, I wanted to be a farmer.
10:52
SPEAKER_00: That's what I wanted to be.
10:54
SPEAKER_00: I wanted to be a farmer, and I wanted to have goats and geese and cows and pigs and corn and grain and fruit and vegetables.
11:07
SPEAKER_00: I wanted to have year-round perfect produce just like they do in Israel.
11:14
SPEAKER_00: That's what I wanted.
11:19
SPEAKER_00: And now I have that.
11:25
SPEAKER_00: I didn't make it, but I buy it from Ralph's.
11:29
SPEAKER_00: You can get everything year-round nowadays.
11:33
SPEAKER_00: They're like, oh, watermelons used to be a summer fruit.
11:36
SPEAKER_00: Guess what?
11:37
SPEAKER_00: You could buy them in the dead of winter now.
11:39
SPEAKER_00: Ow! I don't know, they just do.
11:42
SPEAKER_00: And some of them are pretty good too.
11:45
SPEAKER_00: Isn't that insane?
11:50
SPEAKER_00: Oh goodness.
11:52
SPEAKER_00: Uh, but yeah, I've been thinking about writing stuff about my dream job when I was a teenager.
12:02
SPEAKER_00: Or I shouldn't say thinking about writing.
12:04
SPEAKER_00: This freaking guy, do you guys hear this guy?
12:07
SPEAKER_00: Brrrrrrrrrr! He's got nowhere to go! Where are you gonna go?
12:12
SPEAKER_00: We're in traffic, you freaking idiot! Where are you gonna go?
12:16
SPEAKER_00: You're not going anywhere.
12:17
SPEAKER_00: You know why you're not going anywhere?
12:19
SPEAKER_00: Because you're a guy in a truck with a small freaking pee pee, that's why you're not going anywhere.
12:24
SPEAKER_00: Buy a Tesla, douchebag.
12:27
SPEAKER_00: Fricking up the environment for the rest of us, ho?
12:31
SPEAKER_00: Ho! Ho.
12:36
SPEAKER_00: Sorry.
12:38
SPEAKER_00: Been a little while since I had a good rant.
12:40
SPEAKER_00: Uh yes, I've been thinking about uh as a teen, a young teen, after I got over the farmer thing as a as a child and then into a teen, I wanted to be a police officer.
12:52
SPEAKER_00: Yes, I did.
12:53
SPEAKER_00: So I went into the academy, I finished all the testing and everything I needed to uh to be able to get a job at the Riverside County Sheriff's Department, and then I went in for my interview and lie detector test where they could see whether or not I was a psychopath.
13:11
SPEAKER_00: Went in for those things, and they told me that I wasn't a good fit for the department because I didn't have enough life experience, because I was homeschooled.
13:25
SPEAKER_00: So I didn't have enough life experience because I was homeschooled.
13:33
SPEAKER_00: Isn't that nice?
13:35
SPEAKER_00: I was like, well, I didn't choose to be homeschooled.
13:37
SPEAKER_00: My parents forced me to be homeschooled.
13:40
SPEAKER_00: Doesn't matter, you're not what we're looking for.
13:44
SPEAKER_00: Go and get some experience in life.
13:48
SPEAKER_00: So now I've been robbing stores, I've been embezzling money, I've been printing fake money, I've been making fake IDs and fake passports, and I've been giving them to illegal aliens so they can stay here and not worry about ice.
14:10
SPEAKER_00: Maybe one day I'll commit enough crimes to where I too can be a part of the sheriff's department.
14:18
SPEAKER_00: Maybe I too will get the opportunity to put my knee on someone's neck.
14:23
SPEAKER_00: Maybe I too will get the opportunity to shoot somebody dead because they're bigger than me.
14:31
SPEAKER_00: Maybe I too one day will commit enough crimes to where I can be a police officer.
14:36
SPEAKER_00: Life experience is my freaking ball sack, okay?
14:42
SPEAKER_00: You wanted somebody committed.
14:43
SPEAKER_00: I would have been committed.
14:44
SPEAKER_00: I was physically ready.
14:46
SPEAKER_00: You guys don't think I'm physically ready.
14:48
SPEAKER_00: You look at my pictures and you see me in person and you think, Dave, you're fat.
14:51
SPEAKER_00: You're fat, you little fatty, you little fat, fat, fat.
14:55
SPEAKER_00: Well, guess what?
14:56
SPEAKER_00: Guess what?
14:57
SPEAKER_00: I might be fat, but I'm Mexican, so I have no problem jumping over fences.
15:01
SPEAKER_00: Shut the frick up.
15:02
SPEAKER_00: Okay?
15:02
SPEAKER_00: I'm being serious.
15:04
SPEAKER_00: It wasn't even just a few years ago.
15:06
SPEAKER_00: I decided at 30 years old, I was like, I am gonna go back in.
15:10
SPEAKER_00: This is my last chance to see if it'll work out.
15:12
SPEAKER_00: I am gonna go back in.
15:13
SPEAKER_00: And you know what I did when I went back in there?
15:15
SPEAKER_00: I did the physical training again, and I jumped over a six-foot freaking fence.
15:21
SPEAKER_00: Freaking weighed it all.
15:23
SPEAKER_00: 280 pounds.
15:25
SPEAKER_00: I just threw that thing.
15:27
SPEAKER_00: You know what I'm saying?
15:29
SPEAKER_00: You know, you know how I had to do it?
15:31
SPEAKER_00: I had to, I had to like get my hops on, you know, because I used to play basketball.
15:34
SPEAKER_00: I had to get my hops on, I had to get a good initial hop, and then I had to wheel myself over, and then once I got it was so easy to get over.
15:42
SPEAKER_00: Once I got one leg over, it was so easy.
15:44
SPEAKER_00: I just let my stomach lead.
15:46
SPEAKER_00: You know, my stomach just led, you know.
15:50
SPEAKER_00: It was easy, man.
15:51
SPEAKER_00: It was freaking easy.
15:54
SPEAKER_00: I was like, freaking never wanted me to do pull-ups.
15:57
SPEAKER_00: I was like, I can't do no freaking pull-ups.
15:59
SPEAKER_00: You know, I'd be pulling up, pulling up to in and out.
16:02
SPEAKER_00: That's how I'd be pulling up.
16:03
SPEAKER_00: Frick out of here.
16:04
SPEAKER_00: I'd be pulling up to some freaking Burger King.
16:10
SPEAKER_00: I just think it's so funny that the people that are doing the training, like the sergeants that are there that are leading you, and they're like, give me three more! Give me three more! All that, right?
16:21
SPEAKER_00: They're there, and then as soon as you get out into the field, it's just fatdies.
16:25
SPEAKER_00: It's just freaking fatties.
16:28
SPEAKER_00: There's like one ripped dude because he's he's single or or he's or he's just married and he thinks he needs to keep that physique for right now, and he thinks a lot about himself, and he's got nice freak, he's got a nice fade.
16:40
SPEAKER_00: He's got a nice fade.
16:42
SPEAKER_00: Is it don't you trust cops with a nice fade?
16:45
SPEAKER_00: I just love a cop with a nice fade.
16:48
SPEAKER_00: Thank you for your service.
16:51
SPEAKER_00: Thank you for your service, fade boy.
16:54
SPEAKER_00: You know what I'm saying?
16:55
SPEAKER_00: Fade boy?
16:57
SPEAKER_00: You don't want to gonna take it from a cop that has a fade.
17:01
SPEAKER_00: Oh man.
17:03
SPEAKER_00: Freaking.
17:04
SPEAKER_00: It's like when they have a same the same haircut as a DJ in Miami, it's like, come on.
17:11
SPEAKER_00: Well you just served the public.
17:13
SPEAKER_00: Come on, dude, what are you doing?
17:15
SPEAKER_00: Or ma'am, whatever.
17:17
SPEAKER_00: Sorry.
17:18
SPEAKER_00: Sorry, maybe the ladies wanna fade.
17:21
SPEAKER_00: Maybe they wanna fade with some bangs with a little bang fade.
17:26
SPEAKER_00: That's so dumb.
17:28
SPEAKER_00: I'll stop.
17:28
SPEAKER_00: I'll stop.
17:29
SPEAKER_00: That's dumb.
17:30
SPEAKER_00: Little bang fade.
17:31
SPEAKER_00: Alright, no, but here's the deal, right?
17:35
SPEAKER_00: So I I decided that I was not gonna move forward with it because the only place I wanted to be in the force was I wanted to be in the field.
17:46
SPEAKER_00: In the field.
17:48
SPEAKER_00: I did not want to be in an office, I did not want to be in corrections, I did not want to be a CEO.
17:56
SPEAKER_00: A CO.
17:58
SPEAKER_00: I wanted to be out on the streets.
18:01
SPEAKER_00: I wanted to be loud and proud on the streets, and unfortunately, it just wasn't in the cards, it just didn't happen, didn't really work out with what my family was was needing, and and it was gonna be, you know, uh kind of tough on everybody, me being uh on the field, and uh so I didn't do it, I didn't go through with it, I I didn't do it, and um yeah, but I think this time around, if I would have continued to pursue it, I would have had enough life experience now that I've committed enough crimes and done enough stuff.
18:36
SPEAKER_00: I think I would have been okay.
18:38
SPEAKER_00: So but we'll never know.
18:41
SPEAKER_00: We'll never know.
18:43
SPEAKER_00: So now here we are.
18:44
SPEAKER_00: Now I'm doing DoorDash and I'm doing comedy and applying for other jobs.
18:49
SPEAKER_00: Uh interviews.
18:50
SPEAKER_00: Can we talk about interviews real quick?
18:53
SPEAKER_00: Interviews are so stupid.
18:56
SPEAKER_00: I'm sorry, like it's good, it's so good to like vet people, but like honestly, people can fake it too.
19:07
SPEAKER_00: And you might be like, oh, I'm a really good judge of character.
19:10
SPEAKER_00: I'm a really good judge of character.
19:12
SPEAKER_00: There's nobody that can fake it with me.
19:13
SPEAKER_00: If they're interviewing and they're lying to me, I can spot it a mile away.
19:18
SPEAKER_00: Okay, if they're faking it, these freaking fakers.
19:22
SPEAKER_00: No, you can't.
19:23
SPEAKER_00: No, you can't.
19:24
SPEAKER_00: Everybody's mentally ill nowadays, everybody's got their own stories, they're just making stuff up, they put stuff on their resume, you can't check it anymore.
19:31
SPEAKER_00: Everything's AI.
19:32
SPEAKER_00: You could say you have a master's degree and have AI make it for you.
19:35
SPEAKER_00: You gotta have AI add you to the database of Harvard, and who's gonna find out?
19:40
SPEAKER_00: Eventually they're gonna find out, but they're not even gonna check.
19:43
SPEAKER_00: Nobody looks anymore.
19:44
SPEAKER_00: People just want people that show up to work on time that aren't drunk on freaking uh uh freaking seltzer and who's high on fentanyl.
19:53
SPEAKER_00: You know what I'm saying?
19:55
SPEAKER_00: They they just want people that will show up for work, and if you show up for work on time, you're the boss.
20:02
SPEAKER_00: People people used to say that if you were the hardest worker, you would get ahead.
20:08
SPEAKER_00: Okay?
20:09
SPEAKER_00: That's what people used to say.
20:11
SPEAKER_00: And then there was a period of time where everybody went to school, and then the people that graduated with bachelor's degrees would take jobs away from people, I'm very passionate about this, would take jobs away from from hardworking, even union people, hardworking people, and and they wouldn't be the boss.
20:28
SPEAKER_00: The kid that just got out of college with a four-year degree would be the boss over somebody that's been working with the company for 20 years.
20:36
SPEAKER_00: That's just how it was.
20:38
SPEAKER_00: Okay, and now anybody can be anything.
20:40
SPEAKER_00: I can be anything because AI can teach me anything.
20:46
SPEAKER_00: Anything.
20:48
SPEAKER_00: Anything.
20:50
SPEAKER_00: Do I want to be a doctor all of a sudden?
20:53
SPEAKER_00: Do you know what's a good tool to help you as a doctor?
20:57
SPEAKER_00: A computer that thinks it knows everything.
21:01
SPEAKER_00: Are you coming up with an idea that can help people in the medical field years from now so that you're a millionaire?
21:07
SPEAKER_00: You know who can help you with that?
21:09
SPEAKER_00: AI Grok.
21:12
SPEAKER_00: Freaking Gemini.
21:15
SPEAKER_00: Freaking Grok.
21:18
SPEAKER_00: You know what I'm saying?
21:19
SPEAKER_00: You freaking know what I'm saying.
21:21
SPEAKER_00: You can do anything you want now.
21:23
SPEAKER_00: You could lie about it, you could put stupid crap on your resume, you can have it make fake stuff for you.
21:30
SPEAKER_00: Interviews shouldn't even be a thing anymore.
21:33
SPEAKER_00: It's just like, ask me one question.
21:35
SPEAKER_00: Ask me, are you gonna show up to work on time?
21:37
SPEAKER_00: And then as soon as I don't, as soon as I don't show up to work on time and work hard, you fire me that day.
21:44
SPEAKER_00: No wrongful termination.
21:46
SPEAKER_00: I'll sign a paper ahead of time.
21:47
SPEAKER_00: It says if I freaking start showing up to work late and I stop caring about my work and I stop working hard, just fire me day of.
21:54
SPEAKER_00: I can't sue you for wrongful termination.
21:56
SPEAKER_00: I know exactly what I did, I know exactly how I fricked up, okay.
22:02
SPEAKER_00: That's how it should be.
22:04
SPEAKER_00: Back in the good old days.
22:06
SPEAKER_00: Back in the good old days, people used to take chances.
22:09
SPEAKER_00: People used to take chances on people.
22:12
SPEAKER_00: And now and now everybody's not taking as many chances because people are so freaking stupid and weird.
22:26
SPEAKER_00: Stupid and weird.
22:37
SPEAKER_00: Because of what COVID did to people.
22:39
SPEAKER_00: Some people are still in a COVID funk.
22:42
SPEAKER_00: Some people still wear all their masks out, right?
22:46
SPEAKER_00: They get headaches because they're breathing in their own freaking breath, their carbon monoxide, or whatever the frick it's called when you breathe out.
22:55
SPEAKER_00: Whatever those plants want.
22:56
SPEAKER_00: You're haunting the plants wearing the mask, you dang us.
23:00
SPEAKER_00: Sorry, I'm not I'm not like into the whole mask wearing thing.
23:04
SPEAKER_00: Uh not for any reason in particular uh politically, more just because they're uncomfortable.
23:10
SPEAKER_00: It has nothing to do with my politics other than it makes me feel uncomfortable.
23:15
SPEAKER_00: You know?
23:15
SPEAKER_00: That's the thing, right?
23:17
SPEAKER_00: You gotta you gotta understand that some people are coming from different perspectives.
23:20
SPEAKER_00: And we're not trying to ruin it for everyone else.
23:23
SPEAKER_00: We're just passionate about what we believe in.
23:26
SPEAKER_00: You know what I'm saying?
23:27
SPEAKER_00: And and I don't want you to try and take that away from me, you know what I'm saying?
23:30
SPEAKER_00: You try and take my guns, um, you're gonna you're gonna get them guns if you try and take them.
23:38
SPEAKER_00: Um, there you go, that was dumb.
23:40
SPEAKER_00: I don't have any guns that you know of.
23:44
SPEAKER_00: Let's go.
23:45
SPEAKER_00: Um, yes.
23:48
SPEAKER_00: So talking about other things now that I've thoroughly talked about this subject a lot.
23:55
SPEAKER_00: Oh my goodness.
23:56
SPEAKER_00: I'm really excited about the the open mic tonight.
23:59
SPEAKER_00: I think open mics are just so so great.
24:01
SPEAKER_00: It's just that the training ground for us to to work out jokes and be put into the forge.
24:11
SPEAKER_00: Let's light the forge.
24:14
SPEAKER_00: Let's I love that.
24:15
SPEAKER_00: I just love it.
24:17
SPEAKER_00: Light in the forge.
24:18
SPEAKER_00: You are the fire.
24:20
SPEAKER_00: Uh, we love that.
24:22
SPEAKER_00: We love that.
24:23
SPEAKER_00: We love that intro.
24:24
SPEAKER_00: Some of you recognize it, some of you don't.
24:26
SPEAKER_00: And if you don't, you need to go out to local comedy.
24:30
SPEAKER_00: Okay, so here's the deal.
24:33
SPEAKER_00: Alright.
24:34
SPEAKER_00: No, I'm not gonna be a police officer.
24:37
SPEAKER_00: But I do want to do comedy.
24:39
SPEAKER_00: Comedy is is great, it's it's fun, it's funny.
24:42
SPEAKER_00: Thinking about the different ways I could I could say things and and and present ideas.
24:47
SPEAKER_00: I love that part of it.
24:48
SPEAKER_00: And I will say one thing that that I've learned throughout doing comedy, one thing I have learned, and I started the episode with this, is it is really, really great to be grateful.
25:01
SPEAKER_00: So thank you guys so much.
25:03
SPEAKER_00: Um, I think this episode I'm gonna do a little bit under 30 minutes because uh I gotta keep I gotta keep working, to be honest with you.
25:10
SPEAKER_00: I gotta keep working.
25:10
SPEAKER_00: I gotta clock back in right now.
25:12
SPEAKER_00: I just arrived at my destination.
25:14
SPEAKER_00: So we're probably gonna do just a minute or two under 30 minutes.
25:16
SPEAKER_00: If you don't like it, you can freaking blow me a kiss and send me a postcard from your next vacation spot.
25:23
SPEAKER_00: Okay?
25:24
SPEAKER_00: Because I do what I want with my freaking pot.
25:27
SPEAKER_00: Alright?
25:28
SPEAKER_00: I do what I want.
25:30
SPEAKER_00: So tell you what I want.
25:32
SPEAKER_00: Really, really, really want.
25:33
SPEAKER_00: Sorry.
25:34
SPEAKER_00: Um, you guys have already turned it off by now.
25:37
SPEAKER_00: Nobody's listening past that point.
25:39
SPEAKER_00: You know, once I'm done with the sub with the top with the subjects, once I'm done with the things that I wanted to talk about, then that was it.
25:45
SPEAKER_00: You know what I'm saying?
25:46
SPEAKER_00: That was just it.
25:48
SPEAKER_00: Um, okay, here, DoorDash story.
25:51
SPEAKER_00: I was dashing and I I just did this this morning.
25:55
SPEAKER_00: Somebody ordered a pair of Nikes and a cheeseburger from Red Robin.
26:00
SPEAKER_00: Okay, I just want to live like that.
26:03
SPEAKER_00: I just want to be able to live where I have the money to order myself a brand new pair of shoes and a brand new burger.
26:11
SPEAKER_00: Okay?
26:12
SPEAKER_00: New shoes on my feet, new burger in my belly.
26:16
SPEAKER_00: Do you know what I'm saying?
26:17
SPEAKER_00: Is this resonating with anybody?
26:19
SPEAKER_00: I just want to feel comfortable to be able to order that.
26:21
SPEAKER_00: If my wife calls me right now and she says, babe, I want a new pair of shoes and I'm hungry.
26:27
SPEAKER_00: Can you make something happen?
26:28
SPEAKER_00: And I could order a pair of Nikes just like this guy from Famous Footwear and pick up a burger just like I did at Red Robin and go deliver it to her.
26:37
SPEAKER_00: It would be peak pinnacle husband.
26:41
SPEAKER_00: If I if I ordered my wife a burger and Nikes, that would be peak husband right there.
26:51
SPEAKER_00: And not only did that, but then I went and I delivered it to her.
26:56
SPEAKER_00: Oh baby.
26:58
SPEAKER_00: Oh baby, that would be incredible.
27:01
SPEAKER_00: That would be incredible.
27:03
SPEAKER_00: Uh, if you guys have comments about the show, uh, please leave them below.
27:07
SPEAKER_00: Uh, the next episode 6.5, I have a really special guest.
27:11
SPEAKER_00: Uh, you guys are gonna see when the episode comes out.
27:14
SPEAKER_00: I have a very special guest that I'm very excited about, very excited to have.
27:18
SPEAKER_00: It's gonna be a really, really fun episode.
27:20
SPEAKER_00: It is a uh a 15-minute episode.
27:23
SPEAKER_00: So a little bit of a shorter interview, but so many good positive feedbacks from when I had Marco Trained Ad on.
27:28
SPEAKER_00: I am gonna be having more guests.
27:30
SPEAKER_00: So I hope you guys enjoyed the episodes with guests.
27:33
SPEAKER_00: Please uh like it and comment on it on Spotify, on on Apple, on freaking wherever you are, iHeartRadio, Spotify, I already said that.
27:45
SPEAKER_00: Uh, wherever you're at, please like, comment, do all that stuff.
27:49
SPEAKER_00: Um, I'm still trying to get notifications on from when people comment on third-party sites and um and all that.
27:56
SPEAKER_00: Uh, please follow me on social media at Dave Thompson Comedy, at Carmody Podcast, at i comedy.
28:03
SPEAKER_00: Check that out for all the upcoming shows and stuff like that.
28:05
SPEAKER_00: Uh, plug some shows.
28:07
SPEAKER_00: Yes, shows this uh May, third Thursday of May.
28:13
SPEAKER_00: I forgot the date.
28:14
SPEAKER_00: I want to say it's the 21st.
28:16
SPEAKER_00: Uh, I don't remember.
28:18
SPEAKER_00: Maybe 20th, 21st, whatever, whatever the third Thursday is of May.
28:21
SPEAKER_00: I will be up in Joshua Tree with Max Meisel at the Z Club.
28:25
SPEAKER_00: That's gonna be a very fun show.
28:26
SPEAKER_00: June 19th, I'm opening for Jack Shaw.
28:30
SPEAKER_00: IE comedy presents Jack Shaw, one of the homies, uh Kill Tony Golden Ticket winner.
28:36
SPEAKER_00: Great guy, wonderful guy, awesome guy.
28:38
SPEAKER_00: Uh, so glad I met him.
28:40
SPEAKER_00: I'm so glad that we had lunch together and are freaking chilling now, and it's great to have him.
28:46
SPEAKER_00: So, yeah, definitely want to get tickets for that.
28:48
SPEAKER_00: Tickets will sell out two shows, uh, Juneteenth.
28:52
SPEAKER_00: Juneteenth, and we're making it Juneth with him because Jack is a Jew.
28:58
SPEAKER_00: Jack the Jew, Jack the Juneteenth.
29:01
SPEAKER_00: All right, it's gonna be a great show, uh, an incredible lineup for that.
29:05
SPEAKER_00: Other lineups uh and dates coming out for the heat wave comedy tour, which starts at the end of June.
29:10
SPEAKER_00: It's gonna be June, July, August.
29:12
SPEAKER_00: Doing that with my friends, Mike Baker, Mike James, Melissa Nami, and Pierce Amaro.
29:19
SPEAKER_00: Super excited about the Heat Wave comedy tour, so stay tuned for that.
29:22
SPEAKER_00: Uh, am I filler bustering until the end because I feel bad that I didn't give a full 30 minutes?
29:26
SPEAKER_00: Of course I am.
29:27
SPEAKER_00: Of course I am.
29:28
SPEAKER_00: You think I planned the last five minutes?
29:29
SPEAKER_00: I'm gonna be honest with you, I didn't plan any of this episode at all.
29:33
SPEAKER_00: No, I'm just kidding.
29:33
SPEAKER_00: I did plan some of it.
29:34
SPEAKER_00: But thank you guys so much.
29:35
SPEAKER_00: I'm very grateful for you.
29:36
SPEAKER_00: I love you guys.
29:37
SPEAKER_00: You guys are amazing.
29:38
SPEAKER_00: Uh, I'm gonna stop fiddling around with this baker's hot sauce that I have in my fingers, and I'm just gonna eat something.
29:44
SPEAKER_00: I just need a little snack and a little pick me up, and then I gotta get back to work.
29:47
SPEAKER_00: Thank you guys so much.
29:48
SPEAKER_00: You're amazing.
29:49
SPEAKER_00: Uh like, comment, subscribe, follow, all of those cool things.
29:52
SPEAKER_00: You guys are wonderful.
29:52
SPEAKER_00: Thank you so much.
29:53
SPEAKER_00: Drive safe, and we'll see you next time on the Carmody Podcast.
29:57
SPEAKER_00: Love you guys.
29:57
SPEAKER_00: Goodbye.