Latest / Inspirations for Your Life / Your Old Life Doesn't Fit You Anymore(S5) S34:E6 Thursday
Transcript
- 0:24Well, hello there everyone and welcome once again
- 0:27to the ever-popular Inspirations for Your Life
- 0:29Show.
- 0:30It is so great to be with you.
- 0:32If this is your very first time joining
- 0:34me, I want to take the opportunity to
- 0:36say thank you and I want to say
- 0:38the words welcome.
- 0:39You are very welcome here.
- 0:41If you've been here one time, five times,
- 0:43ten, a hundred, or maybe even more, or
- 0:45lost track of the count, I like to
- 0:48say thank you and welcome, but I also
- 0:49like to say these very important words, welcome
- 0:51back.
- 0:53Yes, welcome back.
- 0:54Thank you so much for choosing to be
- 0:56here and enjoy this great quality and content
- 0:59that I produce on the show and so
- 1:02many others.
- 1:04So you guys know we start our master
- 1:05topic off on Saturday and we roll through
- 1:08the week and we finish up on a
- 1:09Friday.
- 1:10That's how we work.
- 1:11And yes, we have all kinds of great
- 1:14content for you to improve the quality of
- 1:15your life.
- 1:16I have a nice decaf hot tea here.
- 1:18Mmm.
- 1:20Really good to have.
- 1:21Feel free to get yourself one or maybe
- 1:23a juice or water or something else or
- 1:26a snack.
- 1:27Healthy or not, that's up to you.
- 1:29And yeah, it's great to be with you.
- 1:30Don't forget to check out BelieveMeAchieved.com for
- 1:33more of my amazing, of course, inspiring creations,
- 1:36which you can do after the show is
- 1:38over.
- 1:39Alright guys, so let's get ready to show,
- 1:42shall we?
- 1:42So this is about building a life.
- 1:44You don't need to escape from series five,
- 1:46show 34.
- 1:47That is what the master topic is for
- 1:49this entire week.
- 1:51Yes.
- 1:52So the granular topic for today, Thursday, August
- 1:5620th, 2026.
- 1:57Your old life doesn't fit you anymore.
- 1:59Series five, series five, show 34, episode six.
- 2:05And it's Thursday.
- 2:06Before we get into our show, I want
- 2:09to give a shout out because, you know,
- 2:10on Sundays and Thursdays, we give a shout
- 2:12out to local businesses like coffee shops, restaurants,
- 2:15etc.
- 2:16Today's shout out is going out to the
- 2:19team.
- 2:21Actually at a little honey coffee shop.
- 2:24They're located guys in, I believe it's in
- 2:28Ridgewood, New Jersey, right on 35 Godwin Avenue.
- 2:33Yes, it's great to shout out to them.
- 2:36And so why am I doing this?
- 2:38Well, I'm reaching out to them and many
- 2:39others to ask them to visit jcmacademy.com
- 2:43and click on the contact us button and
- 2:46let us know that you'd like to host
- 2:47us.
- 2:47It's completely free.
- 2:48We do a live show at your facility
- 2:51and then we will do a author talk,
- 2:54Q&A and signing.
- 2:57So you definitely would like to check that
- 2:59out.
- 2:59Go to jcmacademy.com and let's help build
- 3:02community together.
- 3:03So a little bit about this little special
- 3:05place.
- 3:06So they've got some interesting little drinks and
- 3:09beverages.
- 3:11And so yeah, just just taking a look
- 3:13at their restaurant, their website, I should say.
- 3:17You know, they have lots of different things.
- 3:20As I'm looking at the menu, they have
- 3:21the daily rituals, things like espresso starting at
- 3:24$4 and they have things like Americanas and
- 3:27they have smoothies starting at $8 like a
- 3:30Ruby Glow, Indigo Glow, Golden Glow, specialty teas
- 3:34and coolers for basically just starting at $5
- 3:37and up.
- 3:38Craft shake and espresso starting at $6 and
- 3:41up.
- 3:43Artisanal cold foam.
- 3:45They've got basically you can choose the the
- 3:48drink base.
- 3:49So this is what they've got here on
- 3:51this menu and it looks like mostly they're
- 3:54they're sharing their their drinks.
- 3:57I didn't see that they have any snacks
- 4:00or anything or any beverage.
- 4:01Let me see here.
- 4:02It looks like it does.
- 4:04I don't think they have any actual.
- 4:06They don't have it listed on their website.
- 4:08I mean, they may.
- 4:08Actually, I see I see some pictures for
- 4:11different things that they have, like different kinds
- 4:13of breakfast items, you know, like muffins and
- 4:16things like that.
- 4:17But what I don't see is I don't
- 4:18see them on the menu.
- 4:19So that might just be something special that
- 4:21they do.
- 4:22So definitely check that out.
- 4:23Let them know that you heard about their
- 4:25place on the Inspirations of Your Life show.
- 4:28Yes.
- 4:29So grateful to be with everyone here tonight.
- 4:32So welcome, everyone, to the ever popular Inspirations
- 4:35for Your Life show.
- 4:37I am in case you guys did not
- 4:39know John Seymour Lee.
- 4:41I'm a serial entrepreneur.
- 4:42I'm an engineer, marketing specialist, video producer, podcast
- 4:45host, coach, keynote speaker, a graduate student at
- 4:49Montclair State University, a passionate lifelong learner, and
- 4:53so grateful now to be a published author.
- 4:56Yes.
- 4:56So grateful for all of that, ladies and
- 4:59gentlemen.
- 4:59Thank you so much for the love.
- 5:01Have you ever looked at your life and
- 5:03realized that, hey, something that once fit perfectly
- 5:07doesn't fit anymore?
- 5:08Maybe like the thing you took out of
- 5:10the box, you're like, I can't get it
- 5:12back in the box that way.
- 5:13It's impossible.
- 5:14Like once you take it out, like it's
- 5:15just not meant to go back in, you
- 5:17know, those times, right?
- 5:18Maybe it's a goal.
- 5:19It's a routine.
- 5:19It's a role.
- 5:20It's an environment, relationship, or even your definition
- 5:24of what we call success.
- 5:26That doesn't automatically mean you made a mistake
- 5:29guys.
- 5:29It might mean you've grown.
- 5:32Yeah.
- 5:33Today I'm exploring 30 ways to recognize when
- 5:36your old life no longer fits and how
- 5:40to start building around the person you're becoming.
- 5:43Number one, your old life doesn't have to
- 5:47fit forever.
- 5:48Nope.
- 5:49Something can have been right for you once
- 5:54without being right forever.
- 5:57Growth sometimes means acknowledging that what worked in
- 6:02one chapter doesn't belong in the next.
- 6:05And that's hard for a lot of people
- 6:07to fathom or to swallow that pill, right?
- 6:10Because it changes who they are.
- 6:12Number two, notice how you've changed.
- 6:15Think about who you were several years ago.
- 6:19Your experiences have probably changed your priorities, abilities,
- 6:24expectations, and perspective.
- 6:27Give yourself credit for that evolution.
- 6:30Number three, let your priorities evolve.
- 6:34Priorities aren't permanent guys.
- 6:37No, they're not permanent contracts.
- 6:38What mattered enormously at one stage of your
- 6:42life may naturally become less important as something
- 6:46else begins to matter more.
- 6:50Hmm.
- 6:51So what does that mean?
- 6:55Well, our life changes, our life morphs, and
- 6:58we discover things about ourselves and others that
- 7:00we didn't know before.
- 7:01Number four, stop forcing yourself into outdated roles.
- 7:05Sometimes we continue playing a role because other
- 7:09people expect it from us.
- 7:11Ask whether that role still represents who you
- 7:14actually are.
- 7:16Number five, build around who you are now.
- 7:19Don't design today's life around yesterday's identity.
- 7:23Look honestly at your current strengths, interests, responsibilities,
- 7:28and ambitions.
- 7:30Then build from there.
- 7:32Number six, release the goals you no longer
- 7:35want.
- 7:36A goal doesn't deserve permanent loyalty simply because
- 7:40you once wrote it down.
- 7:42If you genuinely no longer want the destination,
- 7:46reconsider why you're still traveling toward it.
- 7:49Number seven, make room for new interests.
- 7:53Growth can introduce interests you never expected.
- 7:57Give yourself permission to explore them without needing
- 8:02to justify why they're different from what interested
- 8:07you before.
- 8:08I think that's a key.
- 8:10Number eight, update your definition of success often.
- 8:12Success at one stage might mean achievement, recognition,
- 8:17or growth.
- 8:18Later it might include freedom, impact, relationships, creativity,
- 8:25or time.
- 8:27Define success for who you are today, not
- 8:31who you were.
- 8:33Number nine, stop living by an old version
- 8:35of yourself.
- 8:36Don't keep making decisions based on what the
- 8:40old you would have chosen.
- 8:43The person making today's decision has more experience
- 8:47and information.
- 8:50That's important to acknowledge and respect.
- 8:53Number 10, allow your ambitions to mature.
- 8:57Changing an ambition doesn't necessarily mean reducing it.
- 9:03Sometimes ambition becomes more focused, meaningful, and aligned
- 9:08with what you know and now value.
- 9:12Number 11, guys, choose relationships that support growth.
- 9:18Strong relationships shouldn't require you to remain exactly
- 9:24who you are or who you were.
- 9:29When they began, things can change.
- 9:32Surround yourself with people who can respect your
- 9:36evolution.
- 9:38Number 12, build routines for your current reality.
- 9:42A routine that worked years ago may not
- 9:45work today.
- 9:46Your responsibilities and goals change, so allow your
- 9:49routines to change with them.
- 9:52That's key, guys.
- 9:53Number 13, stop defending choices you've outgrown.
- 9:57There's no need to do that anymore.
- 9:59I mean, you're not trying to impress anybody.
- 10:01You don't need to keep defending a decision
- 10:05simply because you once believed strongly in it.
- 10:11New information can justify a different choice.
- 10:15Number 14, give yourself permission to change direction.
- 10:19Changing direction isn't automatically quitting.
- 10:24Sometimes it's the intelligent response to discovering that
- 10:28another direction fits you better.
- 10:32Number 15, let new strengths reshape your future.
- 10:36You may have developed abilities you didn't possess
- 10:40when you created your original plans.
- 10:43Let those strengths open possibilities you couldn't previously
- 10:49see before.
- 10:51Number 16, build around what you've learned.
- 10:55Experience should change something.
- 10:58Take lessons from successes, disappointments, mistakes, relationships, and
- 11:04challenges and use them to design what comes
- 11:08next.
- 11:09Number 17, stop maintaining appearances that no longer
- 11:15fit.
- 11:16Don't maintain an image simply because people are
- 11:21accustomed to seeing you that way.
- 11:25Your life should be built around authenticity, not
- 11:29appearances, guys.
- 11:31Too many people get this wrong.
- 11:33I think it's because they're trying to impress
- 11:35other people, okay?
- 11:38Trying to impress other people.
- 11:41And that impress doesn't really do much for
- 11:43a lot of people.
- 11:44It just says, hey, this is who I'm
- 11:47trying to be.
- 11:48Number 18, let your actions actually speak the
- 11:51way you want them to.
- 11:53So choose environments where you can expand at
- 11:56your own pace and comfort level.
- 11:58Some environments encourage curiosity and growth.
- 12:00Others continually push you back toward an older
- 12:04version of yourself.
- 12:05Notice where you have room to expand.
- 12:09Number 19, let experience change your thinking.
- 12:14You aren't required to hold every opinion forever.
- 12:18Experience can reveal information you couldn't have understood
- 12:22before.
- 12:23Allow yourself to reconsider that.
- 12:26Number 20, redesign what isn't working anymore.
- 12:31When something repeatedly doesn't work, don't automatically try
- 12:35harder using the same structure.
- 12:38That's insanity, right?
- 12:39Einstein said it.
- 12:40Doing the same thing over and over again,
- 12:41expecting the results that is insanity.
- 12:44Sometimes the structure itself needs redesigning.
- 12:48Number 21, stop being loyal to an outdated
- 12:50plan.
- 12:52Plans are tools, not masters.
- 12:55If circumstances, knowledge or priorities have changed, update
- 13:02the plan instead of sacrificing yourself to it.
- 13:06I think that's another one that we've got
- 13:07to be aware of, like a caveat, right?
- 13:10Something I think that can give us a
- 13:12lot of strength.
- 13:14And guys, it can give us a lot
- 13:16of wisdom, a lot of wisdom, wisdom that
- 13:18maybe we never knew existed.
- 13:22Number 22, build for the person you're becoming.
- 13:28That sounds complicated, but really, guys, it's not.
- 13:34So think for just a moment.
- 13:36Can you do that?
- 13:36Great.
- 13:37Think beyond who you are today.
- 13:42What skills, habits, relationships and environments would support
- 13:48the person you want to become?
- 13:50Next, number 23, allow your identity to expand.
- 13:55You don't have to fit inside one label.
- 13:58You can develop new abilities, interests, responsibilities and
- 14:02ambitions without abandoning everything you've been before.
- 14:07Number 24, choose goals that still excite you.
- 14:11Look at your current goals and ask whether
- 14:15they still create genuine energy.
- 14:18A meaningful goal should pull something out of
- 14:21you beyond the obligation.
- 14:26It's got to be about a passion.
- 14:28Number 25, let growth change your destination.
- 14:32Sometimes growth doesn't merely change how you reach
- 14:36a destination.
- 14:37It reveals that you want a completely different
- 14:41destination.
- 14:42And that's worth recognizing.
- 14:45It happens, guys, you know how?
- 14:47It happens because of our character.
- 14:49The thing we do and no one's watching
- 14:51actually filters down to what people are watching.
- 14:55I think that's an important thing to us
- 14:57to be aware of.
- 14:59Number 26, make your life reflect your evolution.
- 15:02How do you do that, John?
- 15:05It's not hard.
- 15:07If you've changed internally, okay, but everything around
- 15:13you remains designed for who you used to
- 15:17be, eventually you'll feel the conflict.
- 15:22Let your external choices reflect your growth.
- 15:28Number 27, stop apologizing for becoming different.
- 15:32You don't need to apologize because your priorities
- 15:38matured, your interests changed, or your standards evolved.
- 15:44Growth naturally creates differences.
- 15:48I think that's something that a lot of
- 15:49people, I don't want to say they miss
- 15:52it intentionally, but they miss it.
- 15:54They overshoot it because they're too busy trying
- 15:57to prove who they are, and not who
- 15:59they actually want to be.
- 16:03And they don't get grounded in what they're
- 16:05actually doing now.
- 16:05So I think those are, I think those
- 16:07are very important things that we all should
- 16:09think about.
- 16:11Number 28, please build forward instead of backward.
- 16:15How do you build backwards?
- 16:16Well, how do I say this?
- 16:21You build backwards by adopting the things that
- 16:25were in the past, trying to accommodate those
- 16:27things, and not working on the new stuff,
- 16:29right?
- 16:29So don't spend all of your energy trying
- 16:34to recreate an earlier chapter because it feels
- 16:38familiar.
- 16:39It feels warm.
- 16:40It feels good.
- 16:41I've said to you guys time and time
- 16:44again, success happens where you start to get
- 16:48uncomfortable.
- 16:50Now, a lot of you are saying, John,
- 16:51I don't want to feel uncomfortable.
- 16:53Well, then you don't want success.
- 16:55See, we have to do something new before
- 16:58we can grow.
- 17:01We have to.
- 17:02If we don't do that, then how do
- 17:04we become better with ourselves?
- 17:07How do we become better?
- 17:12How do we become better?
- 17:16That's a true, true thing.
- 17:18I think a lot of us don't realize,
- 17:21don't realize like how that works or how
- 17:24that connects to us, right?
- 17:30Just because it feels familiar doesn't mean that
- 17:32that's the path we should take.
- 17:34Take what was valuable from the past and
- 17:39use it to build forward.
- 17:43Forward sometimes gets confusing because we don't always
- 17:46know how to go forward.
- 17:49We may know we don't want to go
- 17:50backward, but yet we don't always know how
- 17:53to go forward.
- 17:54I think that can be a real challenge
- 17:57for people.
- 17:58How do we prevent ourselves from going backward?
- 18:01It's really simple.
- 18:03We look at where we are today.
- 18:05We look at how we're growing.
- 18:08That's the key guys.
- 18:09That is absolutely the key, right?
- 18:12That's an important, important key that lots of
- 18:15people do not understand.
- 18:16Number 29, your life should grow as you
- 18:19grow.
- 18:21As your knowledge, abilities, perspective, and priorities expand,
- 18:25your life should have enough flexibility to expand
- 18:29with them, not against them.
- 18:32I think sometimes we're so busy trying to
- 18:34prove things to ourself and to others that
- 18:37we completely miss the boat.
- 18:39We miss our plane.
- 18:42We miss the agenda.
- 18:44We miss our core purpose.
- 18:48So when we miss our core purpose, can
- 18:50we get it back?
- 18:51Absolutely, we can get it back, but it
- 18:54might not come back instantaneously.
- 18:57We might have to do some work, right?
- 19:01Success lies where we get uncomfortable.
- 19:08Success lies where we become uncomfortable.
- 19:11I didn't say painful, I said uncomfortable, okay?
- 19:22I think that's an important piece that many
- 19:25people kind of miss.
- 19:33Does that make sense guys?
- 19:41I think that's an important piece to understand.
- 19:47Knowing where we were, knowing where we are
- 19:51now, and knowing where we want to be.
- 19:53We don't have to have all of the
- 19:56answers to be on a path of success.
- 20:01We have to acknowledge where we want to
- 20:03go, and we need to be alert to
- 20:07things in our environment that could affect our
- 20:10direction.
- 20:14Our direction.
- 20:15What does that mean?
- 20:17It means that we can easily be taken
- 20:19off our direction by what people say, think,
- 20:23and share with us.
- 20:25Number 30 guys, build a life that fits
- 20:27who you're becoming.
- 20:29You aren't building only for today's version of
- 20:31yourself.
- 20:32I hope not.
- 20:33Create enough room for continue learning, new opportunities,
- 20:38changing ambitions, and the person you're still becoming.
- 20:45Because even though you're not where you want
- 20:47to be yet, enjoy the journey.
- 20:51The journey is so amazing.
- 20:55When we're grateful for the journey, we learn
- 20:58along the way.
- 20:59As I get ready to wrap up the
- 21:01show today, one of the hardest things about
- 21:03growth is realizing that something doesn't have to
- 21:08be bad for you to outgrow it, right?
- 21:12This could be relationships, it could be tasks
- 21:15you do, it could be a business, it
- 21:17could be your hobbies, it could be your
- 21:18passions.
- 21:20A goal can once have been meaningful to
- 21:23you for many years.
- 21:25A routine can once have worked for you
- 21:27for a long time.
- 21:29A role can once have represented you in
- 21:31your whole life, okay?
- 21:35A plan can once have made perfect sense
- 21:38to you.
- 21:39And you can still reach a point where
- 21:42none of them fit anymore.
- 21:45That doesn't necessarily mean failure.
- 21:48Sometimes that evidence points to the fact that
- 21:51the person who created the original plan has
- 21:54learned something and he or she is changing
- 21:56the map.
- 21:58So look at your life and ask yourself
- 22:00this question.
- 22:01What am I maintaining simply because it belonged
- 22:05to an earlier version of me?
- 22:09Maybe there's a goal you're pursuing out of
- 22:12a habit.
- 22:14Maybe there's a routine you've never reconsidered, right?
- 22:19Just maybe.
- 22:21Just be open to this, okay?
- 22:22Maybe you're protecting an image that doesn't represent
- 22:27you anymore.
- 22:29Maybe you're staying loyal to a plan even
- 22:33though your experience has shown you a better
- 22:37direction.
- 22:39Growth should be allowed to change your answers.
- 22:43Take what you've learned with you.
- 22:46Keep the relationships, experiences, values, and lessons that
- 22:51still matter.
- 22:52But don't you dare force yourself backward.
- 22:55Just because the old version feels familiar, comfortable,
- 22:58warm, you're never going to grow.
- 23:02You're never going to grow, guys.
- 23:04Ladies and gentlemen, I am, in case you
- 23:06did not know, John C.
- 23:07Morley, serial entrepreneur.
- 23:08And I thank you from the bottom of
- 23:10my heart for joining me for another amazing
- 23:12episode of the ever-popular Inspirations for Your
- 23:16Life Show.
- 23:17Ladies and gentlemen, please, please, please, please, please
- 23:20notice how you've changed.
- 23:23I know you probably say you haven't changed,
- 23:24but you have changed, guys.
- 23:26You have changed.
- 23:28Start to let your priorities evolve.
- 23:32Update your definition of success.
- 23:34Choose goals that still excite you.
- 23:37Give yourself permission to change direction more than
- 23:42once if you want, as long as they
- 23:44align with your new core values.
- 23:46You don't have to become the person you
- 23:48once expected yourself to be.
- 23:51No reason for that.
- 23:53You get to keep learning, guys, your entire
- 23:55life.
- 23:58You get to keep learning your entire life.
- 24:00That's priceless.
- 24:02You get to keep evolving.
- 24:07You get to evolve.
- 24:08You get to keep learning.
- 24:09You get to keep sharing.
- 24:12That's powerful.
- 24:14And you know what, ladies and gentlemen, you
- 24:15get to keep building.
- 24:21Our whole life is building.
- 24:23Maybe we're not where we want to be
- 24:25yet, but we need to enjoy the journey
- 24:28that we're on as we're getting to our
- 24:30destination.
- 24:31Because getting to our destination is just part
- 24:35of the fun to learn and traverse along
- 24:43our pathway.
- 24:45You know, ladies and gentlemen, your old life
- 24:46doesn't have to fit forever.
- 24:49I know people around who say, well, you
- 24:50know, it's got to fit.
- 24:51You know, you're this and you're that, and
- 24:52you have to do it this way.
- 24:54Says who?
- 24:55Well, says my mom, says my father, says
- 24:58my brother, says my cousin, says my sister,
- 25:01maybe says my boyfriend, says my girlfriend.
- 25:07Okay.
- 25:11That's important, guys.
- 25:23Very important to acknowledge that whole concept.
- 25:31Acknowledge it.
- 25:32Don't try to change it right away.
- 25:33Just acknowledge it.
- 25:36As I said, your old life doesn't have
- 25:38to fit forever anymore.
- 25:41Your life should grow as you grow.
- 25:46So build a life that fits who you're
- 25:52becoming.
- 25:55One of the most devastating things you can
- 25:58do is prevent yourself from moving forward because
- 26:04you're scared, because you're uncomfortable, because you're worried
- 26:10about what people will say, because you don't
- 26:15think you're good enough, or because you don't
- 26:17think you're enough, because you haven't developed the
- 26:23confidence yet to believe that you are so
- 26:26powerful and there's so much you can do,
- 26:30guys.
- 26:32Everything starts with a thought.
- 26:37Everything.
- 26:38My computer, my keyboard, my phone, everything started
- 26:41with a thought, and then moved from there,
- 26:45and then inspired thoughts caused an action to
- 26:51happen, and that action created a reality, a
- 26:56tangible product or a tangible service.
- 27:00So I think those are very important things
- 27:03for us to recognize.
- 27:09Do you think about these things or do
- 27:11you just kind of go day by day?
- 27:13So again, your old life doesn't have to
- 27:16fit forever.
- 27:18That's been a misnomer that we've been taught
- 27:20for years and centuries.
- 27:22Your life should grow as you grow.
- 27:25So build a life that fits who you're
- 27:27becoming.
- 27:29Not saying that every step of the way
- 27:30is going to be peaches and cream, because
- 27:32it's not, but it will teach you things
- 27:36you never would have learned.
- 27:40You'll become a better person and you'll have
- 27:45new insights, ones that would never have reached
- 27:49you before, because now your mind has changed.
- 27:53Ladies and gentlemen, don't forget to stop by
- 27:55basically this little place here called the Little
- 27:59Honey Coffee Shop.
- 28:00As I said there, I think you definitely
- 28:03will enjoy it.
- 28:04They are located at 35 Godwin Avenue in
- 28:07Ridgewood, New Jersey.
- 28:09And if you're watching tonight, I hope you
- 28:11will definitely invite us to be a guest
- 28:14at your facility to host this Race is
- 28:15Your Life show.
- 28:16Have a great one, everyone, and be well.