Latest / Son of a Boy Dad / Semen Analysis | Son of a Boy Dad #184

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Semen Analysis | Son of a Boy Dad #184 · Son of a Boy Dad

• 0:00
  Speaker 1: Hey Son of a Boy Dad listeners. You can find
• 0:02
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  Speaker 5: All righty, Welcome back to the Son of a Boy
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  Speaker 1: Out about loving what about?
• 3:16
  Speaker 3: Hey, what's going on there? Pal?
• 3:17
  Speaker 1: We saw you in the hockey game market. I know
• 3:19
  Speaker 1: you guys, I'm Ryan Whitney.
• 3:20
  Speaker 3: I got a drink named after me. Big deal, Pink Whitney.
• 3:25
  Speaker 3: That's what I thought. See you, fellas, I invented the thing.
• 3:27
  Speaker 1: You pigeoned Pink Whitney for legendary moments.
• 3:31
  Speaker 5: Exactly what about eight inches in thifth.
• 3:36
  Speaker 1: Uh?
• 3:36
  Speaker 5: Francis should be joining us any minute, So don't leave now.
• 3:42
  Speaker 5: We got a lot to unpack today.
• 3:43
  Speaker 1: We have a lot of shit to talk about today,
• 3:46
  Speaker 1: including sexism and misogynies back exactly.
• 3:52
  Speaker 5: Today we're going to be highlighting some difficult topics. When
• 3:56
  Speaker 5: will the war in the Middle East stop.
• 3:58
  Speaker 1: And the triumphant turn of sexism and misogyny.
• 4:03
  Speaker 5: Gold misogyny come to an end once and for all.
• 4:07
  Speaker 10: No, it's not misogyny is back.
• 4:09
  Speaker 5: It's back in a strong way.
• 4:10
  Speaker 1: Goldman Sacks refuses to hire any women. Now really, yeah,
• 4:15
  Speaker 1: who's what's that? Goldman Sacks? I think is a bank,
• 4:18
  Speaker 1: a very successful bank, and all the other top banks
• 4:20
  Speaker 1: have female CEOs and CFOs and Goldman Sacks is like
• 4:25
  Speaker 1: misogyny is back?
• 4:27
  Speaker 5: Yeah, and now exactly it's like Sacks like ball Sacks.
• 4:31
  Speaker 1: Yes, yeah, gold Man Sacks. Oh, I see three masculine
• 4:35
  Speaker 1: ass words.
• 4:37
  Speaker 5: Yeah, so just a bunch of Jews with big balls.
• 4:43
  Speaker 1: The big ball Jews are back on top exactly. That's
• 4:47
  Speaker 1: why the war in the Middle East will not end.
• 4:48
  Speaker 5: They were never really not on top.
• 4:50
  Speaker 1: But yeah, that's true except for one brief period from nineteen.
• 4:53
  Speaker 10: Forty one to nineteen forty five, except for the war.
• 4:57
  Speaker 1: Yeah, it's fucking tough. But someone has to be on top,
• 5:01
  Speaker 1: someone has to lead the case of misogyny. Of course,
• 5:06
  Speaker 1: you watch any good YouTube debates recently.
• 5:08
  Speaker 5: Now, been on what been on a big movie kick?
• 5:11
  Speaker 5: A lot of Vegas heists?
• 5:14
  Speaker 10: You mean the Oceans movies?
• 5:15
  Speaker 5: The Oceans movies and then Casina.
• 5:18
  Speaker 10: Oh yeah, Casino's good.
• 5:20
  Speaker 5: Casino is amazing.
• 5:21
  Speaker 1: Was that really a heist?
• 5:22
  Speaker 5: No? Yeah, it's pretty much just good Fellas but in Vegas.
• 5:28
  Speaker 1: Yeah, what a good Fellas?
• 5:29
  Speaker 5: Pretty much the exact same movie.
• 5:31
  Speaker 1: In Jersey, but it was in Vegas.
• 5:34
  Speaker 5: Like and it's a combination of Goodfellas in Wolf of
• 5:37
  Speaker 5: wall Street.
• 5:38
  Speaker 1: Yeah, but Wolf of Wall Street came after, So it's
• 5:40
  Speaker 1: like Wolf of Wall Street was basically like what if
• 5:43
  Speaker 1: we took.
• 5:43
  Speaker 5: The When was Goodfellas ninety spot on ninety and Casino
• 5:49
  Speaker 5: was ninety five?
• 5:51
  Speaker 3: Was it?
• 5:52
  Speaker 5: Yeah? Probably the bold SCRSEZ And it's the exact same cast,
• 5:57
  Speaker 5: Like the side characters are the same side characters and
• 6:00
  Speaker 5: Goodfellas the.
• 6:01
  Speaker 1: Garden Variety Italians are the same Italians.
• 6:04
  Speaker 5: I mean they did they it was just Goodfellas was
• 6:06
  Speaker 5: so good. I mean it makes sense to do. Yeah,
• 6:09
  Speaker 5: good Fellas was so good.
• 6:10
  Speaker 1: They were just remain and you're not gonna you can't
• 6:12
  Speaker 1: make good Fellas too, No, it's better that they.
• 6:14
  Speaker 10: Made it with a different name.
• 6:16
  Speaker 5: But it's like the exact like they like, they're on top,
• 6:18
  Speaker 5: they all get really into coke and then it crumbles.
• 6:21
  Speaker 5: It's like the exact same.
• 6:22
  Speaker 1: Movie, right, just the white guys being white guys. I
• 6:26
  Speaker 1: mean it was basically what Goldman Sachs is trying to
• 6:27
  Speaker 1: take us back to exactly the casino. Yeah, and crazy
• 6:31
  Speaker 1: girls and then crazy girls get in the way, and
• 6:34
  Speaker 1: that was kind of the warning that Goldman Sachs took there,
• 6:36
  Speaker 1: get these fucking crazy broads out of here, exactly, these
• 6:40
  Speaker 1: paranoid ass crazy to drugs.
• 6:42
  Speaker 5: Anyway.
• 6:43
  Speaker 1: Yeah, it's just disgusts me mm hmm, the death and
• 6:46
  Speaker 1: everything like that. Yeah, fucking Joe Pesci's crazy.
• 6:50
  Speaker 5: Joe Peshi's nuts. Robert de Niro was great.
• 6:52
  Speaker 10: Yeah, he's great too.
• 6:54
  Speaker 5: He was the normal guy.
• 6:55
  Speaker 3: Though.
• 6:56
  Speaker 1: What happened to, like, can we not make gangster movies
• 6:58
  Speaker 1: anymore because we don't have a good stay of Italians.
• 7:01
  Speaker 1: The fact that Peschi, de Niro, Paccino, Leota, we're all
• 7:06
  Speaker 1: like bubbling up at the same time.
• 7:09
  Speaker 5: Yeah, they're all Joe Pesci's like one hundred, Leota is
• 7:13
  Speaker 5: dead and roberts Niro's what. Robertsonniro is still not that old.
• 7:17
  Speaker 5: I mean he's old as shit, but but he's.
• 7:20
  Speaker 10: Having a new kid.
• 7:21
  Speaker 5: Yeah, he's still Yeah, he's still youthful.
• 7:24
  Speaker 1: He went to traumatize that kid before he went, Yeah,
• 7:27
  Speaker 1: I'll just die when you're at a formative half brain,
• 7:31
  Speaker 1: don't worry about one.
• 7:32
  Speaker 10: He'll be good. You'll have a nice trust fund.
• 7:35
  Speaker 1: But I just don't think that they're cranking out uh
• 7:39
  Speaker 1: Italian actress like that. Now it's fucking Irish actors, honestly.
• 7:42
  Speaker 5: Yeah, I mean they did The Irishman, right, But I
• 7:47
  Speaker 5: never watched that.
• 7:48
  Speaker 10: But that was like they're cosplaying as Italians.
• 7:50
  Speaker 5: I never watched it either because it was like four
• 7:52
  Speaker 5: hours long.
• 7:53
  Speaker 1: Yeah, nobody wanted and all I saw was on Twitter,
• 7:55
  Speaker 1: people like making fun of the shitty scene.
• 7:58
  Speaker 10: Yeah, them like being seventy eight years old and.
• 8:01
  Speaker 1: Beating the shit out of someone, Yeah, getting hurt themselves.
• 8:06
  Speaker 5: Raylei Otta was in a show called I think it
• 8:08
  Speaker 5: was called Blackbird on Apple TV, and he plays like
• 8:13
  Speaker 5: this guy's like father and that show is really fucking good.
• 8:18
  Speaker 5: I've seen that show.
• 8:19
  Speaker 1: You're a cinophile because you say Leada instead of Lioda Lioda.
• 8:23
  Speaker 1: I don't know which one it is, but I know
• 8:25
  Speaker 1: that if you thought.
• 8:26
  Speaker 5: It was Raleiota, I don't know. It's probably one of.
• 8:29
  Speaker 1: Leoda just is probably a Philly accent. What's the show
• 8:36
  Speaker 1: Blackbird about.
• 8:37
  Speaker 5: It's about this drug dealer who's like this like hot, cool,
• 8:43
  Speaker 5: jacked guy and he gets arrested for dealing drugs, but
• 8:46
  Speaker 5: he's like a super like charming guy and like can
• 8:50
  Speaker 5: kind of like influence anybody. So they're like, here's what
• 8:53
  Speaker 5: we're gonna do. We're gonna send you to this super
• 8:55
  Speaker 5: dangerous prison where there's this like mentally challenged serial killer
• 9:00
  Speaker 5: who's refusing to admit what he did. And they're like,
• 9:03
  Speaker 5: we want you to go in and become friends with
• 9:06
  Speaker 5: him and get him to confess to.
• 9:07
  Speaker 1: You, really does he do it?
• 9:10
  Speaker 5: Well, I'm not gonna spoil the show, bro, who cares?
• 9:13
  Speaker 5: I dude, it's like I I think it's not not
• 9:16
  Speaker 5: a lot of people watch it because it's on Apple
• 9:18
  Speaker 5: TV and not a lot of people have Really it's
• 9:20
  Speaker 5: that good, dude, it's fucking phenomenal.
• 9:22
  Speaker 1: Shout added to the queue.
• 9:23
  Speaker 5: Yes, it's only like seven.
• 9:25
  Speaker 1: Episodes considered attitude.
• 9:27
  Speaker 5: It's really fucking good, so hour long episodes, probably forty
• 9:32
  Speaker 5: five minutes.
• 9:32
  Speaker 10: So it was basically just a movie that they chopped up.
• 9:35
  Speaker 5: Yeah, that's what I mean. That's that's what all mini
• 9:36
  Speaker 5: series are.
• 9:37
  Speaker 1: Yeah. I would have watched The Irishman if it was
• 9:39
  Speaker 1: a series, but since it's fucking and they could have
• 9:42
  Speaker 1: made it a little bit longer, put a little more
• 9:44
  Speaker 1: fluff in there. Yeah, but a four hour movie yeah
• 9:47
  Speaker 1: fuck that.
• 9:48
  Speaker 3: Well.
• 9:48
  Speaker 5: I mean those fucking Joe Peshi and roberts Niro probably
• 9:51
  Speaker 5: have to work the same hours as like when they
• 9:53
  Speaker 5: have babies on set. It's like they get thirty minutes
• 9:56
  Speaker 5: at a time. Yeah, because they're so god Yeah.
• 10:00
  Speaker 1: Yeah, make the face, Robert de Niro, frown with your
• 10:07
  Speaker 1: mouth closed. De Niro, We eat a fucking poster. What
• 10:10
  Speaker 1: they used to do was remake the same movie and
• 10:14
  Speaker 1: just call it a different name. Yeah, like Good Fellows
• 10:16
  Speaker 1: to Casino. Now they just remake the same concept and
• 10:22
  Speaker 1: make it shittier.
• 10:23
  Speaker 3: Yeah.
• 10:24
  Speaker 1: I saw a Roadhouse last night, the remake of the
• 10:26
  Speaker 1: movie Roadhouse.
• 10:28
  Speaker 5: Yeah, were you at like the premiere?
• 10:29
  Speaker 3: Yeah?
• 10:30
  Speaker 5: Wow? How did that happen?
• 10:31
  Speaker 3: I don't know.
• 10:33
  Speaker 1: I literally have no idea. I have a crazy celeb
• 10:35
  Speaker 1: story from the premiere too. Well.
• 10:36
  Speaker 5: I mean I saw your wife was posting and she
• 10:39
  Speaker 5: was with you guys were with like Connor McGregor. I
• 10:42
  Speaker 5: totally forgot about it. Must have been like about to
• 10:43
  Speaker 5: fall asleep when I watched that, because I just remembered that.
• 10:46
  Speaker 1: What do you mean, Oh yeah, yeah that we were
• 10:48
  Speaker 1: at the premiere last night? Yeah, why were you where?
• 10:50
  Speaker 5: Did you have to wear like a tux?
• 10:52
  Speaker 1: No? But I mean we had to dress I think
• 10:54
  Speaker 1: a cocktail chic.
• 10:56
  Speaker 5: So what did you wear?
• 10:57
  Speaker 1: A cocktail dress? A cocktail dress?
• 10:59
  Speaker 5: I hear, I'm bad?
• 11:01
  Speaker 1: Something cute? The boys were going crazy? Was it bad?
• 11:04
  Speaker 5: People said that movie was gonna be terrible. I don't
• 11:06
  Speaker 5: think you can say it's bad if you went to
• 11:08
  Speaker 5: the premiere though that you can't be at a premiere
• 11:11
  Speaker 5: being like, man, this movie's dog shit.
• 11:15
  Speaker 1: Everybody was going everybody was loving it, Like the crowd
• 11:18
  Speaker 1: was going crazy. Like I've never been in a movie
• 11:21
  Speaker 1: theater where like somebody gets punched and everyone's like yeah, yeah,
• 11:25
  Speaker 1: and they were doing that. I guess how. That's how
• 11:26
  Speaker 1: it's like a like a pre like a premiere of
• 11:29
  Speaker 1: like a Marvel movie, or like when people go the opening.
• 11:32
  Speaker 5: Night of Yeah, or Black Panther, Black.
• 11:34
  Speaker 1: Panther, and the whole crowds like clapping and crying and
• 11:37
  Speaker 1: shit like that. But that's what they were doing for
• 11:39
  Speaker 1: this movie. Where was it the premiere? Yeah, it was
• 11:45
  Speaker 1: at an undisclosed look, yeah, no, it was that like
• 11:50
  Speaker 1: the fucking like sixtieth and Broadway, whatever the fuck is
• 11:53
  Speaker 1: up there.
• 11:54
  Speaker 5: Radio City.
• 11:55
  Speaker 10: No, it was on the West side.
• 11:57
  Speaker 3: Damn.
• 11:57
  Speaker 5: I don't know. Jill and Hall had that in his bag.
• 11:59
  Speaker 1: So that's here's my story.
• 12:00
  Speaker 5: You met Jillen Hall.
• 12:02
  Speaker 1: I went to the fucking bathroom midway through the movie
• 12:04
  Speaker 1: because they get they tell you like get there at
• 12:07
  Speaker 1: like five thirty or some shit like fucking they're like
• 12:10
  Speaker 1: walk the red carpet, And I was like, I got
• 12:12
  Speaker 1: there later than that, I'm not walking the red carpet.
• 12:17
  Speaker 1: They and Robbie Fox is doing interviews on the Red carpet.
• 12:20
  Speaker 1: He McGregor and he got Jillen Hall.
• 12:22
  Speaker 5: I saw that. I saw him get with McGregor. But
• 12:25
  Speaker 5: he knows McGregor.
• 12:26
  Speaker 10: Yeah, and McGregor knows him.
• 12:28
  Speaker 5: Yeah, there closet person like Robbie.
• 12:29
  Speaker 1: Yeah, it's fucking sick. I go to the bathroom in
• 12:32
  Speaker 1: the middle of the movie because they tell you to
• 12:34
  Speaker 1: get there at five thirty and then they're like, the
• 12:35
  Speaker 1: movie will start at seven thirty, promptly, it'll be two
• 12:38
  Speaker 1: hours and one minute. They're so specific with the times.
• 12:41
  Speaker 1: We're sitting in the seats till like eight fifteen. The
• 12:43
  Speaker 1: shit doesn't start. Yeah, and all they have is popcorn
• 12:45
  Speaker 1: and smart waters, and I'm just pounding smart waters, so.
• 12:48
  Speaker 10: Like an hour fifteen minutes.
• 12:49
  Speaker 1: I fucking go into the bathroom of the fucking of
• 12:53
  Speaker 1: the movie theater.
• 12:54
  Speaker 5: Yeah, to pe and Gillen Hall's in there banging lines.
• 13:01
  Speaker 3: All right.
• 13:02
  Speaker 1: I'm at the fucking I go to the bathroom. I
• 13:05
  Speaker 1: fucking go to appeared at the urinal. I go to
• 13:08
  Speaker 1: wash my hands. Yeah, and I fucking I'm looking in
• 13:11
  Speaker 1: the mirror. Jillen Hall walks into the bathroom, goes to
• 13:16
  Speaker 1: the fucking uh journal, opens up like like a notebook,
• 13:22
  Speaker 1: like like address book type of thing, like a calendar,
• 13:25
  Speaker 1: like a small calendar. Dump sack. Doesn't even line it up.
• 13:33
  Speaker 5: Yeah, just yeah, a fucking full toot.
• 13:36
  Speaker 10: And he doesn't know I'm looking.
• 13:37
  Speaker 1: But then he like turns around and walks and I'm
• 13:40
  Speaker 1: like drying my hands at the kiosk, at the at
• 13:43
  Speaker 1: the sink or whatever, and he comes up to me
• 13:45
  Speaker 1: or or like, and he he's making eye contact through
• 13:47
  Speaker 1: the mirror with me, and he's like, tell whoever you want.
• 13:51
  Speaker 1: No one's gonna believe you.
• 13:56
  Speaker 5: Holy shit, that's insane. Oh my god, Yeah, dude, that's crazy.
• 14:04
  Speaker 1: I couldn't believe it.
• 14:08
  Speaker 5: Holy fuck, dump sack. That's awesome.
• 14:11
  Speaker 10: Dump Sack.
• 14:12
  Speaker 1: No line up, just walk out of a fucking like
• 14:15
  Speaker 1: little black book type of type of deal.
• 14:19
  Speaker 5: You got a picture with him?
• 14:20
  Speaker 1: No, I didn't want to.
• 14:21
  Speaker 10: I didn't want to get a picture because it was
• 14:23
  Speaker 10: in the bathroom.
• 14:23
  Speaker 5: Yeah, yeah, it felt bad. That's crazy. What did you
• 14:27
  Speaker 5: say after that? You just laugh?
• 14:28
  Speaker 1: Yeah?
• 14:28
  Speaker 5: And then one and then left.
• 14:31
  Speaker 10: Uh no, he left before I left. He didn't wash
• 14:33
  Speaker 10: his hands.
• 14:33
  Speaker 5: Oh that's the leading story here, Jake Chilling Aholton nice Covid.
• 14:40
  Speaker 1: Refuses to wash his hands for a full ninety seconds
• 14:43
  Speaker 1: because I watched along just to kind of like see
• 14:45
  Speaker 1: what he was doing.
• 14:46
  Speaker 5: Oh yeah, of course, sure enough. I got a show
• 14:48
  Speaker 5: you're doing the ABC's, I got a singing happy birthday.
• 14:51
  Speaker 1: Show in a movie.
• 14:53
  Speaker 10: Who else was there?
• 14:54
  Speaker 1: Keenan kel Kel from Keenan and Kel was there, Nice
• 14:58
  Speaker 1: Fibulo says, Hi, yeah, Connor Wood was there.
• 15:03
  Speaker 5: How do those people get to go to every single
• 15:05
  Speaker 5: like famous person event, Keenan in Fibula like, I feel
• 15:09
  Speaker 5: like all those TikTok people are just they just go
• 15:11
  Speaker 5: to like the Rosters, the Grammys. Yeah, what is that?
• 15:14
  Speaker 10: I don't know.
• 15:15
  Speaker 5: I've never once gotten an invitation to anything like that.
• 15:18
  Speaker 10: You gotta start checking your inbo.
• 15:19
  Speaker 5: When I went to the SNL after party, they were
• 15:21
  Speaker 5: all there. Oh they're like their names are like permanently
• 15:25
  Speaker 5: engraved on the list. Oh that makes sense. What is it?
• 15:29
  Speaker 10: What's what's free social?
• 15:32
  Speaker 3: Yeah?
• 15:34
  Speaker 1: Oh yeah, oh oh got it, got it, got it.
• 15:35
  Speaker 1: It's like poppy Rozzil employees, free Social employees.
• 15:39
  Speaker 5: That makes sense.
• 15:40
  Speaker 10: Yeah, that makes sense.
• 15:41
  Speaker 1: Yeah, They probably didn't want me telling that fucking that tale.
• 15:45
  Speaker 1: But who's gonna believe me?
• 15:46
  Speaker 5: Yeah, exactly, Well, he probably didn't know he was talking
• 15:49
  Speaker 5: to one of the top one hundred comedy podcasters on
• 15:52
  Speaker 5: the on the planet.
• 15:53
  Speaker 10: One of one hundred killers.
• 15:54
  Speaker 5: Yeah, there's not that many of us. It's really there's
• 15:57
  Speaker 5: only like forty thousand.
• 16:00
  Speaker 3: A thousand.
• 16:01
  Speaker 1: Yeah, it's a fucking ton of us. But it was
• 16:04
  Speaker 1: a very it was a very interesting movie experience. I
• 16:08
  Speaker 1: had better seats that this with than the fucking premiere
• 16:10
  Speaker 1: of the movie that I was in, though, fucking bodied movie.
• 16:13
  Speaker 5: Yeah, you looked like you were right up front. You
• 16:15
  Speaker 5: were in front of McGregor.
• 16:16
  Speaker 1: I was, Yeah, I literally was.
• 16:19
  Speaker 5: That's why it was McGregor there. Oh he's in, he's
• 16:21
  Speaker 5: in the movie.
• 16:21
  Speaker 10: He steals the show of the movie. Yeah, yeah, he's.
• 16:24
  Speaker 1: Like you see his bare ass, like for maybe five
• 16:27
  Speaker 1: full minutes of the movie. Damn, you see so much
• 16:30
  Speaker 1: of his bare ass. I don't know if there's a
• 16:31
  Speaker 1: better fucking.
• 16:33
  Speaker 5: So, how does that go with a premiere? What do
• 16:34
  Speaker 5: they they play the movie and then what Jillen Hall
• 16:36
  Speaker 5: comes up and talks.
• 16:38
  Speaker 10: No, Jillen Hall came up and talked beforehand.
• 16:41
  Speaker 1: Oh okay, and then like I thought that everybody would
• 16:43
  Speaker 1: sit and watch all the credits and be really respectful,
• 16:45
  Speaker 1: everybody got the fuck out.
• 16:47
  Speaker 10: Uh and and just bounce right away.
• 16:50
  Speaker 5: Is there a party after?
• 16:51
  Speaker 10: There was a party after?
• 16:52
  Speaker 3: Did you go?
• 16:52
  Speaker 10: I had like drinking a.
• 16:54
  Speaker 5: Half drink and a half just enough to their right
• 17:00
  Speaker 5: to quit. When that leads to some of us knowing
• 17:02
  Speaker 5: to quit Caterpillars with Jill and Hall.
• 17:06
  Speaker 10: More like ant Hills, Francis Welcome Brothers.
• 17:11
  Speaker 1: Roan was doing lines with Jill and Hall last night?
• 17:14
  Speaker 3: Is that right?
• 17:14
  Speaker 10: They weren't lines and I wasn't doing them with him.
• 17:17
  Speaker 6: Yeah.
• 17:17
  Speaker 5: I don't even know if you can retell the story,
• 17:19
  Speaker 5: but it's one of the funniest things I've ever.
• 17:21
  Speaker 3: Heard Maggie or Jake both.
• 17:23
  Speaker 1: How crazy is it that I just saw Maggie fucking
• 17:26
  Speaker 1: a week and a half ago and now I'm seeing Jake.
• 17:29
  Speaker 3: Yeah that's pretty good.
• 17:30
  Speaker 10: Well, it's fucking incredible.
• 17:32
  Speaker 3: I love Jake, Jalen Hall love.
• 17:35
  Speaker 5: You're gonna love him even more after the story.
• 17:37
  Speaker 3: I don't need you. I'll listen to that episode perfect.
• 17:40
  Speaker 3: I don't want to make you.
• 17:41
  Speaker 5: We can't continue the rest of the episode, pretending that
• 17:43
  Speaker 5: that didn't happen. You got to tell the story again. Well,
• 17:45
  Speaker 5: if you want to do you, dude, it's funny as fun.
• 17:48
  Speaker 3: Because you want to keep going. Okay, you gotta hear it.
• 17:50
  Speaker 5: No, I just want I want your reaction because it's
• 17:52
  Speaker 5: so funny.
• 17:53
  Speaker 3: Okay, give me, give me.
• 17:54
  Speaker 1: It's a good celebrity story, have a good celebrity interaction.
• 17:58
  Speaker 1: I forget to tell me we could cut it. No,
• 18:01
  Speaker 1: that's not I get to the movie early. I get
• 18:03
  Speaker 1: to the movie early. I get to the movie of
• 18:05
  Speaker 1: five thirty. It's like and they're like, uh, or I
• 18:08
  Speaker 1: didn't get there at five thirty. I probably got there
• 18:10
  Speaker 1: at like six something, but they said movie starts promptly
• 18:14
  Speaker 1: at seven thirty. You have to be in your you
• 18:16
  Speaker 1: have to get there by like seven or something like that,
• 18:19
  Speaker 1: or they'll release your tickets to the public. So I
• 18:21
  Speaker 1: got there early, sat in the seats, thought everything would
• 18:24
  Speaker 1: be prompt because they were so specific with the times.
• 18:26
  Speaker 1: All they had was popcorn and SmartWater. I'm chugging the
• 18:28
  Speaker 1: smart water. So by the time this movie starts, it's
• 18:31
  Speaker 1: the premiere of Roadhouse Last Night. Jillhen Hall's in it
• 18:33
  Speaker 1: and I went to the bathroom midway through the movie.
• 18:36
  Speaker 1: I'm the only person in the bathroom and fucking pee
• 18:40
  Speaker 1: go to wash my hands, and fucking jilln. Hall walks
• 18:43
  Speaker 1: into the bathroom and I'm fucking like long washing my
• 18:46
  Speaker 1: hands ninety full seconds, just watching him through the mirror,
• 18:49
  Speaker 1: like looking at him behind me. He walks to the jourinal,
• 18:54
  Speaker 1: doesn't start peeing, pulls out a small like notebook, like
• 18:57
  Speaker 1: a like a count, like a personal count, like little
• 19:00
  Speaker 1: black book type of thing, dump sack, not even doesn't
• 19:05
  Speaker 1: even line it up, toots the whole thing right there,
• 19:09
  Speaker 1: and fucking turns around, sees me looking at him through
• 19:12
  Speaker 1: the mirror, walks up next to me, doesn't wash his hands,
• 19:16
  Speaker 1: but he goes tell whoever you want, no one's gonna
• 19:19
  Speaker 1: believe you. Watch out without washing his hands.
• 19:30
  Speaker 3: Oh my god, Oh my god, what a story.
• 19:36
  Speaker 11: That is incredible. Wow, what a relief that you needn't
• 19:41
  Speaker 11: tell it again? Holy shit, didn't offer you any No.
• 19:47
  Speaker 1: I was like, uh, I didn't exist to him. I
• 19:51
  Speaker 1: might as well have been He might as well been
• 19:53
  Speaker 1: talking to a painting.
• 19:54
  Speaker 3: He does not strike me as the type of guy
• 19:57
  Speaker 3: who would do something that mythical.
• 20:01
  Speaker 5: Yeah, Maybe it's because he's got all jacked for a
• 20:03
  Speaker 5: Roadhouse and he has another role coming up where he's
• 20:04
  Speaker 5: gotta be a little skinnier.
• 20:06
  Speaker 10: Maybe it's skinnier. I don't know.
• 20:07
  Speaker 1: He's so he was so lean in the movie Roadhouse
• 20:10
  Speaker 1: that like, but I don't know if.
• 20:11
  Speaker 3: Yeah, but he was wiry and ripped right.
• 20:14
  Speaker 1: Yeah, yeah, yeah, like lean, like like the most beautiful
• 20:18
  Speaker 1: abs and stuff you saw. Every saw him in a
• 20:24
  Speaker 1: Broadway musical, Sondheim musical called Sundays.
• 20:28
  Speaker 3: In the Park with George. Of course, it is tough
• 20:32
  Speaker 3: to square that and broke Back Mountain with the masculine
• 20:39
  Speaker 3: dynamic energy that you just described.
• 20:41
  Speaker 1: Well, he was also in South Paul. I mean in
• 20:44
  Speaker 1: this movie he's like Jarhead, jar Head, He's like this Jarheads.
• 20:48
  Speaker 5: So fucking yeah, you should have told him that.
• 20:52
  Speaker 3: I would have.
• 20:52
  Speaker 5: I would have said Jarheads way better than just shit.
• 20:55
  Speaker 3: It just shows you the range. Was Roadhouse any good?
• 20:58
  Speaker 10: No, he said it was terrible, Sash, I'm not allowed
• 21:02
  Speaker 10: to say that.
• 21:03
  Speaker 3: Why No?
• 21:04
  Speaker 5: I said, it's just funny to be at a premiere
• 21:06
  Speaker 5: and everyone's like, Dan, this movie fucking blows, wearing like tuxes.
• 21:11
  Speaker 10: I wouldn't say it was. I wouldn't say it was terrible.
• 21:14
  Speaker 3: I mean, it doesn't speak.
• 21:15
  Speaker 5: You can't get this is going to get back to him.
• 21:18
  Speaker 10: For sure, I wouldn't say it was terrible.
• 21:20
  Speaker 3: The star of the movie left in the middle of
• 21:24
  Speaker 3: the premiere.
• 21:25
  Speaker 1: But I think that he's it's like, yeah, he's seen
• 21:28
  Speaker 1: a hundred times. There's a There were other I think
• 21:31
  Speaker 1: there was one other premiere in Austin, but this was
• 21:33
  Speaker 1: like the global premiere something.
• 21:34
  Speaker 3: I thought he would be miffed that you had left
• 21:37
  Speaker 3: in the middle of the movie.
• 21:40
  Speaker 1: One guy in the bathroom. He probably did, like.
• 21:42
  Speaker 3: You could have been at any movie. Were there other
• 21:44
  Speaker 3: movies playing to a premiere?
• 21:45
  Speaker 10: No, it wasn't.
• 21:47
  Speaker 5: I don't think it was like an AMC. I think
• 21:49
  Speaker 5: they were in like a theater.
• 21:50
  Speaker 1: It was like it was like it was like it
• 21:55
  Speaker 1: was like sixtieth and Broadway or some shit like, oh.
• 21:57
  Speaker 3: Here in New York.
• 21:58
  Speaker 10: It was in New York.
• 21:59
  Speaker 3: Can you how'd you get tickets to this?
• 22:00
  Speaker 1: I don't know you. I got an email SAG for sure.
• 22:05
  Speaker 3: I'm not I'm in SAG and I don't get what
• 22:08
  Speaker 3: do you like that? Send me?
• 22:11
  Speaker 1: What was What was that? A filmmakers, film actors, guilt.
• 22:17
  Speaker 5: That's not my joke. That's 's joke.
• 22:18
  Speaker 10: No, it's not.
• 22:19
  Speaker 1: That's like a South Park Oh really writers guild. But
• 22:24
  Speaker 1: but Grace said she just got an email too.
• 22:27
  Speaker 3: Damn.
• 22:27
  Speaker 5: I should have checked my eye. Probably got big hitters.
• 22:30
  Speaker 3: It's the heavy hitters.
• 22:32
  Speaker 10: Yes, I think that. Uh yeah, I don't know.
• 22:35
  Speaker 3: It was.
• 22:36
  Speaker 1: It was a cool experience. But people were just whooping
• 22:39
  Speaker 1: it up in the crowd like they were loving it.
• 22:41
  Speaker 1: Robbie loved it. Grace loved the movie. Was there too,
• 22:44
  Speaker 1: Robbie so he interviewed, Uh, Jonan Hall in the red carpet?
• 22:47
  Speaker 1: He was a red carpet.
• 22:49
  Speaker 3: He was stressing up yesterday.
• 22:51
  Speaker 1: Yes for this.
• 22:52
  Speaker 3: He looked great.
• 22:54
  Speaker 10: That's cool for this. It was fantastic, was it? Did
• 22:57
  Speaker 10: you see Iron Claw? Think so wreck it?
• 23:01
  Speaker 3: Ralph is? I didn't call the one with Hugh Jackman
• 23:04
  Speaker 3: where they fight robots against each other.
• 23:05
  Speaker 1: No.
• 23:06
  Speaker 5: Iron caused the Zac Efron movie about the Yeah, yeah,
• 23:10
  Speaker 5: I heard that was good, phenomenal, really yeah, amazing.
• 23:13
  Speaker 1: But I was so disturbed by Efron's uh visage his
• 23:19
  Speaker 1: face in that movie that I feel like I couldn't
• 23:22
  Speaker 1: even get into it.
• 23:23
  Speaker 5: Efron murdered in that movie.
• 23:25
  Speaker 1: Did he Yeah, he's good. Where did you see it
• 23:27
  Speaker 1: in theaters?
• 23:28
  Speaker 5: Yeah?
• 23:28
  Speaker 1: Really?
• 23:29
  Speaker 5: Yeah a while ago? What the fuck it was so good?
• 23:32
  Speaker 5: I think I said that I saw it. We definitely
• 23:34
  Speaker 5: talked about it. If I talked about it with Brandon.
• 23:36
  Speaker 10: Zone out whenever you're talking.
• 23:37
  Speaker 5: Yeah, I must talk about it with Brandon. Brandon's really
• 23:40
  Speaker 5: been pissing me off lately.
• 23:42
  Speaker 1: Let's hear it.
• 23:42
  Speaker 5: Well, every time I text him, he takes fucking six
• 23:44
  Speaker 5: hours to reply and then he sends me a snarky
• 23:47
  Speaker 5: ass message back Walker. Yeah, he might be. Yeah, he's
• 23:51
  Speaker 5: allad mostly sports show going on?
• 23:55
  Speaker 2: Are you?
• 23:55
  Speaker 3: Why are you texting him?
• 23:56
  Speaker 5: Because he's one of my best friends.
• 24:01
  Speaker 1: You guys aren't unlikely friendship. You guys got to start
• 24:04
  Speaker 1: going to Blackhawks games together.
• 24:06
  Speaker 5: Yeah, we talk about it a lot. No. I texted
• 24:09
  Speaker 5: him the other day and I said, do you think, uh,
• 24:11
  Speaker 5: do you think Michael Penix Junior is better than Jayden
• 24:14
  Speaker 5: Daniels And then he said yes, and I said we'll
• 24:16
  Speaker 5: see and he said, so, then, why did you text
• 24:18
  Speaker 5: me just trying to chop it up? Dude? My bad?
• 24:22
  Speaker 1: Why that text has a billion other questions that hasn't
• 24:27
  Speaker 1: wanted to ask.
• 24:28
  Speaker 5: Why the fuck.
• 24:28
  Speaker 1: Are you asking him that.
• 24:30
  Speaker 5: Because he's a big college football guy.
• 24:31
  Speaker 1: Do you want to know the answer or are you
• 24:33
  Speaker 1: just starting a conversation.
• 24:34
  Speaker 5: No, I want to know the answer because I think
• 24:36
  Speaker 5: I think Penix is better than Jayden Daniels.
• 24:38
  Speaker 10: What is making you think that?
• 24:40
  Speaker 5: I've been watching a lot of tape, have you really? Yes?
• 24:43
  Speaker 1: I mean Penis throws one of the best deep balls.
• 24:45
  Speaker 5: Oh, I mean it's a beautiful ball.
• 24:46
  Speaker 1: But the problem is his up and down. He doesn't
• 24:48
  Speaker 1: have that kind of up and down mid range.
• 24:50
  Speaker 5: And he's a little bit older. Yeah, but he has
• 24:52
  Speaker 5: a little bit of a lag problem.
• 24:54
  Speaker 1: But transfer the transfer market doesn't necessarily mean that a
• 24:56
  Speaker 1: guy's bad though.
• 24:57
  Speaker 5: No, Joe Burrow transferred, and yeah, I think he's I
• 25:00
  Speaker 5: think he's one of the top qbs in the draft class.
• 25:02
  Speaker 1: But did he benefit from having a great wide out
• 25:04
  Speaker 1: in Roma Doon?
• 25:05
  Speaker 5: I don't know. I don't know if it matters. I
• 25:10
  Speaker 5: just don't sell.
• 25:11
  Speaker 3: It's like when a fucking cunt at your dinner reservation
• 25:15
  Speaker 3: starts speaking French to the waiter.
• 25:19
  Speaker 5: And the very good you're up to date on the
• 25:24
  Speaker 5: draft class, dude, Saturday, I spend hours just washing tape of.
• 25:28
  Speaker 1: All the grinding so much.
• 25:30
  Speaker 3: Yeah, all the way, I'm that cunt at that.
• 25:33
  Speaker 1: Yeah, that's why I want to go to France with you, Francis,
• 25:36
  Speaker 1: just so I could hear.
• 25:37
  Speaker 3: You fully that cut. And by the way, yesterday, we'll
• 25:43
  Speaker 3: get back to ball, don't worry. Yeah, I can go
• 25:45
  Speaker 3: back to sitting out again. I'm a little light headed
• 25:48
  Speaker 3: because I just jizzed and had blood drawn, just and
• 25:53
  Speaker 3: had blood drawn within five minutes with each other. Yeah,
• 25:57
  Speaker 3: I had to do like, uh, you do the genetic
• 26:00
  Speaker 3: testing as well.
• 26:02
  Speaker 10: What does what's genetic testing?
• 26:04
  Speaker 3: It's to see if you have a risk of certain things.
• 26:08
  Speaker 3: Oh really, I think the big one might be MS.
• 26:11
  Speaker 1: What the fuck?
• 26:12
  Speaker 3: What's the one that your body drowns in your own
• 26:16
  Speaker 3: excess fluids or something like that. That sounds like pneumonia.
• 26:19
  Speaker 3: There's another one that's really bad. There's a few that
• 26:21
  Speaker 3: are really bad. And then if you if whatever.
• 26:23
  Speaker 10: I want any of the M S A LS S
• 26:26
  Speaker 10: A S.
• 26:28
  Speaker 3: Yeah. I have no idea. I don't know much, but
• 26:30
  Speaker 3: I think MS is one that you can test for.
• 26:33
  Speaker 1: Damn.
• 26:34
  Speaker 3: Anyway, Uh where were we? Oh, yesterday I was parking
• 26:39
  Speaker 3: my city bike at the dock right outside of our
• 26:41
  Speaker 3: apartment building. Yes, and a woman to my right. I
• 26:44
  Speaker 3: could hear her speaking French to her friend and they
• 26:47
  Speaker 3: were and then she turned to me and she was
• 26:50
  Speaker 3: she goes, excuse me, but can you help me with
• 26:55
  Speaker 3: the bicycle? And I was like yes, and I was
• 27:01
  Speaker 3: biding my time to whip out my French.
• 27:04
  Speaker 12: And she was like, well, what what is his phone number?
• 27:09
  Speaker 12: I cannot take the bike because it's but I have
• 27:13
  Speaker 12: a daily pass and she was reading the one eight
• 27:17
  Speaker 12: hundred number and it was like one eight hundred bike
• 27:21
  Speaker 12: help or something.
• 27:23
  Speaker 1: She didn't know.
• 27:23
  Speaker 3: She was like, what is this? And I was like, oh,
• 27:27
  Speaker 3: you don't know that. Once upon a time there was
• 27:31
  Speaker 3: letters numbers, and letters on a phone meant something. There
• 27:36
  Speaker 3: was a corresponding letter to each number on a phone.
• 27:39
  Speaker 10: Right, eight seven to seven cash now collect?
• 27:42
  Speaker 3: Yeah, cars, well call at uh exactly. She didn't know that,
• 27:47
  Speaker 3: and so I had to pull out my smartphone. And
• 27:49
  Speaker 3: then as I'm explaining it English, I just flipped to French.
• 27:53
  Speaker 10: What is she was?
• 27:54
  Speaker 1: She delighted.
• 27:55
  Speaker 3: She stayed in English and didn't comment on it. And
• 27:58
  Speaker 3: it pissed me off.
• 28:00
  Speaker 5: Your French must have not been good enough.
• 28:01
  Speaker 3: My French was so much better than her English so
• 28:06
  Speaker 3: much better. She doesn't even know fucking predictive text or
• 28:10
  Speaker 3: like any of these things.
• 28:11
  Speaker 5: You know, I don't know how to do that.
• 28:13
  Speaker 3: Do you know that once upon a time? Would you
• 28:14
  Speaker 3: know what letter A D is on the phone? What? No?
• 28:19
  Speaker 3: That is?
• 28:19
  Speaker 5: I have a whole bit about it in my act,
• 28:21
  Speaker 5: and you've seen me do it one hundred times.
• 28:22
  Speaker 3: I don't usually watch you. I'm usually drinking.
• 28:25
  Speaker 10: That kind of thing.
• 28:26
  Speaker 5: True, I know, I don't know how. I I never
• 28:29
  Speaker 5: had to do that.
• 28:30
  Speaker 3: We're talking to the host and being like, I can't
• 28:32
  Speaker 3: believe he's still doing this.
• 28:34
  Speaker 5: Is actually really good and he kills Oh does it's
• 28:37
  Speaker 5: one of my best jokes.
• 28:38
  Speaker 1: Really do it for us?
• 28:40
  Speaker 3: No?
• 28:40
  Speaker 5: I can't.
• 28:41
  Speaker 3: I'm usually that's usually the part of the act where
• 28:43
  Speaker 3: I'm telling the host, dude, can you go back out
• 28:45
  Speaker 3: and do like four minutes of buffer? Bring the temperature
• 28:49
  Speaker 3: back up that crowd wear tapping out on that fucking
• 28:53
  Speaker 3: glacial stage.
• 28:55
  Speaker 1: Just maybe like have a people like like, let's hear
• 28:58
  Speaker 1: you on the left side, are you on the right side?
• 29:01
  Speaker 3: Can you go back out and make sure that the
• 29:04
  Speaker 3: people who have flocked to the bathroom during his set
• 29:07
  Speaker 3: can have time to come back.
• 29:09
  Speaker 5: It's gonna be a lot of that this weekend to
• 29:11
  Speaker 5: zoom their seats, like, hey, Bakersfield, I might have to
• 29:17
  Speaker 5: have the host come out and do that in the
• 29:18
  Speaker 5: middle of my set, like break my set up into halves.
• 29:22
  Speaker 1: You might need a hype man, like fucking flavor Flave
• 29:24
  Speaker 1: to come out and be like, let me hear you
• 29:26
  Speaker 1: in the back.
• 29:27
  Speaker 5: They had they merged my shows.
• 29:29
  Speaker 3: That's fine.
• 29:30
  Speaker 10: Yeah, that's for the best.
• 29:31
  Speaker 3: That's fine.
• 29:32
  Speaker 5: There was one of the shows had one ticket sold.
• 29:35
  Speaker 3: They deleted a show of mine in uh Houston, just
• 29:39
  Speaker 3: deleted it. Didn't even tell.
• 29:40
  Speaker 5: Me I'd rather them delete. Yeah, I thought they were
• 29:43
  Speaker 5: going to delete the weekend, which I was just not
• 29:45
  Speaker 5: gonna lie. I was kind of pumped about you were.
• 29:48
  Speaker 3: Now I'm going to Salt Lake City this weekend and
• 29:50
  Speaker 3: not many people are coming to that one.
• 29:54
  Speaker 1: The beers there are like they're very low alcohol. Dude.
• 29:59
  Speaker 3: I think no.
• 30:00
  Speaker 10: I thought it was the Mormonism.
• 30:02
  Speaker 3: Maybe the Salt Lake downtown area is not at altitude,
• 30:05
  Speaker 3: but I certainly know that the ski resorts are very
• 30:07
  Speaker 3: high up.
• 30:08
  Speaker 1: There's a great hike right by the downtown of Salt Lake.
• 30:11
  Speaker 1: It's like a bluff that basically overlooks everything, very very nice,
• 30:16
  Speaker 1: approachable hike where it's not too far out of the way.
• 30:18
  Speaker 5: Oh, you're gonna be able to ski the whole weekend.
• 30:21
  Speaker 5: Damn man, it's dude. Doing the road is so weird
• 30:25
  Speaker 5: because it's just like some weekends are great and then
• 30:27
  Speaker 5: it's just this weekend is going to be I'm gonna
• 30:28
  Speaker 5: be by myself in the middle of nowhere in California,
• 30:33
  Speaker 5: at least to Bakersfield. No, dude, I post it is
• 30:37
  Speaker 5: the beach. No. The only replies I got were, dude,
• 30:40
  Speaker 5: this is one of the worst cities in America. Really,
• 30:43
  Speaker 5: every people that live in Bakersfield be like, why are
• 30:45
  Speaker 5: you coming here? It's so bad?
• 30:47
  Speaker 1: Well, don't they just come to the show and shut
• 30:48
  Speaker 1: the fuck up.
• 30:49
  Speaker 5: I don't know. It's probably not safe for them to
• 30:51
  Speaker 5: leave their houses. They're just on they got to go
• 30:55
  Speaker 5: in between drone strikes.
• 30:57
  Speaker 1: Yeah, what is it when like a military as like
• 31:00
  Speaker 1: a city on lockdown? Marshal law, Marshall Law, Bakersfield large
• 31:06
  Speaker 1: martial law.
• 31:07
  Speaker 5: For the last decade, no one is talking about the
• 31:11
  Speaker 5: genocide in Bakersfield, California going on.
• 31:14
  Speaker 1: Just barbed wire fences up all the all over the place.
• 31:19
  Speaker 3: I get like places like that, and where Nate Diaz
• 31:22
  Speaker 3: is from Stockton.
• 31:24
  Speaker 1: Stockton actually is like has like a top ten murder rate.
• 31:27
  Speaker 3: Yeah, but isn't that by Sacramento.
• 31:31
  Speaker 10: I think it's like in between the Bay and Sacramento.
• 31:34
  Speaker 5: Maybe I'm going to Sacramento in May, and that looks nice.
• 31:38
  Speaker 5: That's up by that's like close to like Lake Tahoe.
• 31:40
  Speaker 1: You gotta go to the state capitol up there.
• 31:42
  Speaker 5: Yeah, I'm gonna go. I'm gonna go fly fishing out
• 31:44
  Speaker 5: there when I go. Nice, definitely gonna be dry season,
• 31:47
  Speaker 5: happy hatch, happy hatches.
• 31:51
  Speaker 3: Fellas.
• 31:51
  Speaker 5: Let's choose some parachute adams.
• 31:55
  Speaker 1: Should we go, Should we talk about Francis giving blood
• 31:58
  Speaker 1: and sperm? Or should we talk back to Ball?
• 32:01
  Speaker 10: Let's choose our own adventure.
• 32:02
  Speaker 3: I think we need to finish the ball.
• 32:05
  Speaker 5: About Ball was that I was just I was looking
• 32:07
  Speaker 5: into this because I was under the impression for the
• 32:12
  Speaker 5: last couple of months that Bears were gonna take Caleb Williams,
• 32:16
  Speaker 5: which they are, Yes, Commanders are gonna take Marvin Harrison Junior,
• 32:19
  Speaker 5: They're definitely not, Nope, And the Patriots are gonna take
• 32:21
  Speaker 5: Jaden Daniels. But now it looks like the Commanders are
• 32:23
  Speaker 5: gonna take Jayden Daniels. So now I'm trying to convince
• 32:25
  Speaker 5: myself that Pennix Junior is our best bet because I
• 32:29
  Speaker 5: don't want the Patriots to draft Drake may at all.
• 32:32
  Speaker 5: I think he's awful because he's white.
• 32:36
  Speaker 3: Yes, we seem to hear you call them the Commanders.
• 32:40
  Speaker 3: I have not succumbed to the woke mob.
• 32:43
  Speaker 5: Well, I I just think that Drake may Is is
• 32:46
  Speaker 5: just going to be like Mac Jones or Zach Wilson.
• 32:48
  Speaker 5: He's just a skinny white kid.
• 32:49
  Speaker 1: He's not skinny, he's probably he probably fucking squatch.
• 32:53
  Speaker 5: Like five hundred, pretty big, he's pretty huge.
• 32:55
  Speaker 1: What do you mean, bro? With respect on his thick dump.
• 32:58
  Speaker 5: He's actually a significantly bigger than Pennick Junior.
• 33:02
  Speaker 1: Can you give me? Can you rank your top five
• 33:04
  Speaker 1: quarterbacks this year's draft?
• 33:06
  Speaker 5: This year's draft? Yeah, Cale Williams won, Pennock Junior two,
• 33:12
  Speaker 5: Jay and Daniels three, bow Knicks four, Drake May five.
• 33:21
  Speaker 3: Where J. J.
• 33:22
  Speaker 5: McCarty not even not even in top fifteen. Really, I
• 33:24
  Speaker 5: think the high school quarterbacks are better than J. J. McCarthy.
• 33:27
  Speaker 5: What dud JJ McCarthy is so bad.
• 33:30
  Speaker 1: Really, they just weren't undefeated and won a national championships.
• 33:33
  Speaker 1: They had a good team and the quarterback has nothing
• 33:35
  Speaker 1: to do with it.
• 33:36
  Speaker 5: Not that team. Now, well, I think I think I
• 33:38
  Speaker 5: could have played quarterback on that team and they would
• 33:40
  Speaker 5: have won as many games.
• 33:41
  Speaker 1: The uh. At this point of the year, the draft
• 33:45
  Speaker 1: minds get so high minded, and the fact that you
• 33:48
  Speaker 1: have you kind of broke from the norms with your ranking,
• 33:51
  Speaker 1: I think will serve you well in the long run.
• 33:53
  Speaker 10: You could be wrong, but at least you're thinking for yourself.
• 33:55
  Speaker 3: I don't know.
• 33:56
  Speaker 5: Just dude, Pennix Junior, his his his long ball, beautiful drake.
• 34:02
  Speaker 5: May have you ever watched him throw a deep ball?
• 34:05
  Speaker 5: It's nasty, shaking the whole.
• 34:07
  Speaker 10: Just what metrics do you look for when you're trying
• 34:11
  Speaker 10: to scout a good quarterback.
• 34:13
  Speaker 5: Just how comfortable they are in the pocket, long ball,
• 34:16
  Speaker 5: shallow ball, how quick they go through progressions yep, dodging tackles.
• 34:22
  Speaker 10: Do they have happy feet or they calm in the pocket.
• 34:25
  Speaker 5: Pennix Junior looks calm in the pocket, steady, Caleb Williams.
• 34:29
  Speaker 5: I mean, that's a trained professional right there, stone cold killer.
• 34:33
  Speaker 10: Oh yeah, on't schedule one of.
• 34:35
  Speaker 5: The two fifty.
• 34:37
  Speaker 1: Yeah, yeah, all right, that exhausts it.
• 34:40
  Speaker 5: Yeah, that's pretty much all I had to say from.
• 34:42
  Speaker 10: Our balls to yours, Francis.
• 34:46
  Speaker 3: We don't just have to go to me. I mean,
• 34:47
  Speaker 3: it's fun for me to take it away.
• 34:49
  Speaker 1: We literally have nothing else literally said, even all the
• 34:52
  Speaker 1: words and terms that we knew.
• 34:54
  Speaker 3: Yeah, I like this this. When'd you get that last week? Nice?
• 34:58
  Speaker 1: Yeah, he had to do something to show his New
• 35:00
  Speaker 1: England fandom, but still cope with the fact that he
• 35:04
  Speaker 1: has uh lost his his sweet precious mac Jones.
• 35:08
  Speaker 5: All alrighty, everybody, let's talk about the gentleman. They say
• 35:13
  Speaker 5: a gentleman always keeps his word. But I can't repeat
• 35:17
  Speaker 5: any of the words that the weed dealing, gambling, murdering, aristocrats,
• 35:21
  Speaker 5: aristocrats say in The Gentleman.
• 35:23
  Speaker 1: Couldn't even say aristocrats much the words that he says. Actually,
• 35:27
  Speaker 1: it's tough words over the gentleman, but it's not a
• 35:30
  Speaker 1: tough watch, I'll tell you that much.
• 35:32
  Speaker 5: Guy Ritchie's first TV show ever, only on Netflix. Look,
• 35:36
  Speaker 5: if you know anything about me, you know I'm a
• 35:38
  Speaker 5: very big.
• 35:39
  Speaker 1: You're richie, you're a guy. Guy.
• 35:41
  Speaker 5: Guys Guy exactly. Hey, I love Guy Ritchie. I love
• 35:46
  Speaker 5: all of his work. That movie that he did with
• 35:48
  Speaker 5: Gillenhall phenomenal. Probably not as good as The Gentleman though,
• 35:52
  Speaker 5: Oh No.
• 35:52
  Speaker 3: The gentle Names puts Jake Jillenhall under the table.
• 35:57
  Speaker 5: It's based on his award winning films, based on his
• 36:00
  Speaker 5: a warm winning film. The Gentleman series stars Theo James
• 36:03
  Speaker 5: and a whole new cast of criminal lords and ladies
• 36:07
  Speaker 5: slumming it in Britain's Criminal Underworld, Guns Out and Pinky's Up.
• 36:13
  Speaker 5: Watch what happens next when you try and play gangsters
• 36:16
  Speaker 5: at their own game. Don't miss The Gentleman, now playing
• 36:20
  Speaker 5: only on Netflix.
• 36:21
  Speaker 3: Everybody's talking about how Bill Belichick was poorly portrayed in
• 36:24
  Speaker 3: that documentary Ball but he didn't do himself any favors.
• 36:29
  Speaker 1: He's an ordinary, cheating bastard.
• 36:31
  Speaker 3: He's an asshole.
• 36:32
  Speaker 10: He's an asshole and he cheats.
• 36:35
  Speaker 5: He's the greatest coach of all time, and they made
• 36:37
  Speaker 5: him out to be like, like, what did they they did?
• 36:41
  Speaker 5: They did they want to win or not?
• 36:43
  Speaker 3: Him not commenting at all on why he benched Malcolm Butler.
• 36:49
  Speaker 5: That was the only questionable thing.
• 36:50
  Speaker 3: If Malcolm Butler didn't fucking bang Balichick's wife.
• 36:57
  Speaker 1: Right, and he was probably like five minut plate for
• 37:00
  Speaker 1: a meeting or something.
• 37:01
  Speaker 10: Yeah, you're shitting son.
• 37:03
  Speaker 5: Yeah, well yeah, that part was definitely questionable. But the
• 37:06
  Speaker 5: rest of it, I mean, dude, they would they would win.
• 37:08
  Speaker 5: It would be like tensions were rising between Belichick and
• 37:13
  Speaker 5: Brady and then he'd be like, oh, but they won
• 37:14
  Speaker 5: the Super Bowl again, and they'd be like, but Brady
• 37:17
  Speaker 5: needed to get out. Someone had to go. And then
• 37:19
  Speaker 5: they interviewed Brady and they're like, you went over to
• 37:21
  Speaker 5: Robert Craft's house. What did you guys talk about there?
• 37:24
  Speaker 5: And then Brady is like, I think some of these
• 37:26
  Speaker 5: things I want I would rather keep to myself and
• 37:28
  Speaker 5: not really talk about them their private conversations. And then
• 37:31
  Speaker 5: it cuts to Robert Craft and he's like, Tommy came
• 37:34
  Speaker 5: over and I mean he broke down crying. He said
• 37:37
  Speaker 5: Belichick is a demon, and it's like, dude, why you
• 37:40
  Speaker 5: bet tom Brady just said he didn't want to talk
• 37:42
  Speaker 5: about it. And then it was just clearly Robert Craft
• 37:45
  Speaker 5: paid for a documentary to be like Robert Craft is
• 37:48
  Speaker 5: the greatest of all time. Belichick had nothing to do
• 37:50
  Speaker 5: with it.
• 37:51
  Speaker 3: I did think that the omission of the Robert Craft
• 37:54
  Speaker 3: Robin Tugs scandal? Oh yeah, every other piece of bad
• 37:59
  Speaker 3: press that happened around the Patriots was covered.
• 38:02
  Speaker 5: They covered Hernandez, Yes, they covered Hernandez, spygate to flake Gate,
• 38:07
  Speaker 5: but they didn't mention fucking robber Craft getting jerked off.
• 38:10
  Speaker 1: Like theas of a super Bowl.
• 38:12
  Speaker 5: Yeah, like like an hour before the super Bowl started,
• 38:15
  Speaker 5: Robert Craft. Was that a rub and tug.
• 38:17
  Speaker 1: The most obvious rubin tug?
• 38:19
  Speaker 3: Yeah?
• 38:19
  Speaker 1: Name place?
• 38:20
  Speaker 5: Yeah, and they were skipped over.
• 38:22
  Speaker 3: Was he a producer on?
• 38:23
  Speaker 5: It had to have been, Oh, come on, I had
• 38:25
  Speaker 5: to have been well. But then a bunch of a
• 38:28
  Speaker 5: bunch of the people in that are coming out being
• 38:30
  Speaker 5: like that. They took a bunch of ship like one
• 38:32
  Speaker 5: of the I forget who it was. Someone came out
• 38:34
  Speaker 5: and was like I was, I was interviewed for five hours.
• 38:37
  Speaker 3: But that's always what happens. That's why you have to
• 38:39
  Speaker 3: be very careful when you do a documentary.
• 38:42
  Speaker 1: They're gonna take the most benign and juicy thing that
• 38:44
  Speaker 1: you say.
• 38:45
  Speaker 10: Benign.
• 38:45
  Speaker 3: Wow, great word.
• 38:47
  Speaker 1: No, but Francis and I have a we have a
• 38:49
  Speaker 1: quibble over the usage of benign.
• 38:53
  Speaker 3: I'd forgotten that we had that quibble, and now.
• 38:59
  Speaker 1: You're gonn to be brought back into it.
• 39:01
  Speaker 3: Wait, I can't remember what it was that we.
• 39:03
  Speaker 1: Just did it. You you found my usage to be
• 39:07
  Speaker 1: a bit off, but.
• 39:08
  Speaker 3: I don't mind the time what you just said. I
• 39:10
  Speaker 3: thought it worked there.
• 39:12
  Speaker 1: Just now, wait, can we talk about your fucking Let's.
• 39:18
  Speaker 3: Talk about it? I got my.
• 39:19
  Speaker 1: Way, I want to. I don't wait. I don't know
• 39:20
  Speaker 1: if you Now, let's choose your own adventure.
• 39:22
  Speaker 10: Francis huh, So.
• 39:24
  Speaker 5: I don't need you touching my legs after you just
• 39:26
  Speaker 5: came within the last thirty minutes.
• 39:27
  Speaker 1: I do you want to talk about your cum? Let's
• 39:30
  Speaker 1: choose your own adventure.
• 39:31
  Speaker 10: You want to talk about.
• 39:31
  Speaker 1: Your common blood taking or your your blog?
• 39:37
  Speaker 3: You know, I don't know how you guys start.
• 39:39
  Speaker 5: Talking about the blog. Just give me like a two
• 39:41
  Speaker 5: minute heads up so I can.
• 39:42
  Speaker 3: Leave because you don't read.
• 39:45
  Speaker 5: I just don't know if I want to be in that.
• 39:47
  Speaker 1: Let him know audio, But.
• 39:48
  Speaker 3: We need to cover the blog.
• 39:50
  Speaker 5: We can talk about it.
• 39:51
  Speaker 1: I just thought it was such a well written, fun
• 39:54
  Speaker 1: to read blog.
• 39:55
  Speaker 3: I you sent me your message and I didn't know
• 39:58
  Speaker 3: how you would feel. And I care deeply about I
• 40:00
  Speaker 3: trust your opinion.
• 40:01
  Speaker 5: I thought it was so fun to read Ron's an
• 40:03
  Speaker 5: evil person.
• 40:04
  Speaker 3: Yeah, he loves that shit. He's incredibly wonderful himself. But
• 40:10
  Speaker 3: when other people are casting shots and things, he gets
• 40:15
  Speaker 3: giddy about it.
• 40:16
  Speaker 6: Yeah.
• 40:16
  Speaker 1: I mean, I think to to deny, to deny that
• 40:21
  Speaker 1: you get giddy about that is to deny the baseness
• 40:25
  Speaker 1: of human nature. True, Like that is what like our
• 40:28
  Speaker 1: chimpanzee brain enjoys, like like drama and fighting and stuff
• 40:33
  Speaker 1: like that. And to like pretend that you don't is
• 40:36
  Speaker 1: like this unfair moral high ground that people climb to.
• 40:40
  Speaker 1: That's like I'm above this, Like I don't like arguing,
• 40:44
  Speaker 1: or like they don't want to appeal to their like
• 40:49
  Speaker 1: you know, the the awkwardness I guess that you feel
• 40:52
  Speaker 1: in this situation because you think that Chris Castelani's going
• 40:55
  Speaker 1: to school shoot us all or some shit like that. Whoa, whoa, whoa.
• 40:57
  Speaker 5: I would never never said that, never would say that.
• 41:00
  Speaker 10: I don't think he's going to sounds like you do.
• 41:02
  Speaker 3: I mean. I took the elevator to the third floor today.
• 41:07
  Speaker 3: I came all the way up. I just wanted to
• 41:10
  Speaker 3: have as little exposure to the office as possible.
• 41:13
  Speaker 1: One show has or one ticket has been sold in
• 41:16
  Speaker 1: Salt Lake City.
• 41:19
  Speaker 5: I would see that's what Castalani should do.
• 41:21
  Speaker 3: He shouldn't. You don't put this evil a salon.
• 41:24
  Speaker 5: He should pull a fifty cent jaw rule and buy
• 41:26
  Speaker 5: all the tickets to your Salt Lake City shows and
• 41:30
  Speaker 5: then just be the only person in the crowd behold
• 41:33
  Speaker 5: the hole. See that that he legitimately should do that.
• 41:39
  Speaker 5: That would be that would be hilarious.
• 41:41
  Speaker 1: Yeah, that would be funny. I might do that on
• 41:45
  Speaker 1: his behalf or.
• 41:45
  Speaker 5: Just like just for that would be so funny.
• 41:47
  Speaker 3: Yeah, great, great gag man. Sas really got me. He
• 41:50
  Speaker 3: bought all the tickets and sold out a show and
• 41:54
  Speaker 3: I only got seventy door gotcha, ass he could have
• 41:58
  Speaker 3: just venmoded me. I could have, you know, thanks for
• 42:04
  Speaker 3: the multiple thousands of dollars that I wasn't read your
• 42:10
  Speaker 3: whimsical sense.
• 42:11
  Speaker 5: Of Casaloni could do that and then just expense the
• 42:13
  Speaker 5: entire thing. Say it was for content.
• 42:18
  Speaker 1: They yeah, they basically would be Dave doing that. But
• 42:20
  Speaker 1: I just thought it was like it had nothing to
• 42:24
  Speaker 1: do with you, It had nothing to do with him.
• 42:26
  Speaker 1: You just read something like a like a like a
• 42:29
  Speaker 1: bunch of jokes in a row like that, and it's
• 42:31
  Speaker 1: just like funny and stimulating to read.
• 42:34
  Speaker 3: Yeah, I had a few good ones in there.
• 42:36
  Speaker 5: It was definitely it's like I do in a battle rap.
• 42:37
  Speaker 1: It's like it doesn't matter who who the two people are,
• 42:40
  Speaker 1: you just want to see like a bunch of good
• 42:41
  Speaker 1: lines in a row.
• 42:43
  Speaker 3: I liked hill. I liked the line I had and
• 42:46
  Speaker 3: this is me sucking my own deck.
• 42:48
  Speaker 10: Of course it's barstool.
• 42:49
  Speaker 3: But I liked the line I had about he has
• 42:53
  Speaker 3: enough skeletons in his closet to Oh, yeah, that correct
• 42:57
  Speaker 3: satisfy the decorative needs of every Cinco de Mayo party
• 43:02
  Speaker 3: from here until Elfan del Mundo.
• 43:05
  Speaker 5: Which I didn't even get that part. But I still the.
• 43:08
  Speaker 3: Spanish for the end of the world.
• 43:10
  Speaker 1: There's like this parallel of language. It just shows how
• 43:13
  Speaker 1: good of a writer you are.
• 43:14
  Speaker 3: Yeah, but you would have done something better, you would
• 43:16
  Speaker 3: have had No, I wouldn't have that type of writer.
• 43:19
  Speaker 3: I was trying to think if there was something with
• 43:20
  Speaker 3: Dia de los Puertos that would have been a good time.
• 43:24
  Speaker 3: But the distance between Cinco to my own is Da
• 43:27
  Speaker 3: de los Martos. The same thing, isn't it? Like the
• 43:31
  Speaker 3: next day or something. But when is that? Oh Diego knows.
• 43:38
  Speaker 1: Is it is?
• 43:39
  Speaker 5: Diego's from Diego? Aren't you from New Jersey?
• 43:43
  Speaker 3: No, it's that's how they say it. It's on the
• 43:49
  Speaker 3: Southern Peninsula. GA. That is good Sineloa Cartel.
• 43:59
  Speaker 1: What was the movie where they they about uh yeah.
• 44:06
  Speaker 3: See look at your accent is fucking shaft?
• 44:13
  Speaker 1: Well what was that movie where they're all it's basically
• 44:16
  Speaker 1: about that and they like go to the fucking like
• 44:20
  Speaker 1: the other side is like a Disney movie, like a.
• 44:23
  Speaker 3: Oh yeah, is it Coco?
• 44:24
  Speaker 1: No?
• 44:24
  Speaker 5: I don't think so.
• 44:26
  Speaker 3: No wahaka.
• 44:27
  Speaker 5: I watched one of them. Well, actually I didn't watch it.
• 44:30
  Speaker 5: I watched Coco. I didn't watch the movie. I watched
• 44:33
  Speaker 5: the person on a plane next to me watch.
• 44:35
  Speaker 3: That movie Little on the Nose Coco.
• 44:38
  Speaker 1: Seriously, Yeah, it is always more fun to watch the
• 44:41
  Speaker 1: person next to you.
• 44:42
  Speaker 10: Oh yeah, but I was trying to think of the movie.
• 44:43
  Speaker 1: Title because I would I would have tried to play
• 44:46
  Speaker 1: with that, but there's nothing really to play with there.
• 44:49
  Speaker 1: Coco with them dude, like the yeah, nothing there nothing.
• 44:53
  Speaker 5: J Jollenhall Coco, Jay Gi loves I. I always find
• 44:59
  Speaker 5: the way my god.
• 45:07
  Speaker 3: Uh yeah, Castellani wrote a blog. I was I don't know.
• 45:15
  Speaker 3: I was pissed off. Why because not? I didn't mind
• 45:21
  Speaker 3: the shot he took it me. That didn't mean anything.
• 45:24
  Speaker 3: He made a joke that I looked like the Duke
• 45:26
  Speaker 3: lacrosse team, And what happened with the Duke lacrosse team?
• 45:30
  Speaker 3: They were raping, falsely accused of rape of two black
• 45:36
  Speaker 3: strippers in Raleigh, Durham, North Carolina and a crusading. Uh,
• 45:46
  Speaker 3: you're in your mark, Normander right now. This word association
• 45:54
  Speaker 3: can't even help himself.
• 45:56
  Speaker 1: Yeah, keep going that.
• 45:58
  Speaker 3: The DADA was in a reelection year and he was like,
• 46:01
  Speaker 3: I'm taking this case. I'm gonna make this a national story.
• 46:04
  Speaker 3: And there was all sort of evidence apparently that would
• 46:08
  Speaker 3: have exonerated and ended the case, but they kept running
• 46:12
  Speaker 3: it up and everyone assumed that these boys were guilty
• 46:17
  Speaker 3: and they were not guilty at all, and they made
• 46:20
  Speaker 3: thirty for thirty about it.
• 46:22
  Speaker 5: Oh shit.
• 46:23
  Speaker 3: And the three boys, the three kids that were charged,
• 46:26
  Speaker 3: I mean they just picked them out of a lineup
• 46:28
  Speaker 3: and like one of them wasn't even fucking there. He
• 46:30
  Speaker 3: was at like an atm across town and there was
• 46:32
  Speaker 3: like security cam footage of that, but the.
• 46:34
  Speaker 1: Boys wind up coming out out on top. Those boys
• 46:36
  Speaker 1: turned into the note.
• 46:38
  Speaker 3: But due those kids are I would say maybe a
• 46:49
  Speaker 3: third to a half of the public still thinks that
• 46:53
  Speaker 3: those kids did My parents, my parents think that they
• 46:59
  Speaker 3: did it. And I remember talking to my mom and.
• 47:02
  Speaker 5: I was how long what happened?
• 47:04
  Speaker 10: This was like two thousand and seven, Oh.
• 47:07
  Speaker 3: Yeah, six, it happened. It was the biggest thing. It
• 47:10
  Speaker 3: was the biggest sports story until Sandusky. Damn.
• 47:15
  Speaker 1: And they were probably like, thank god those kids got raped.
• 47:18
  Speaker 3: Yeah.
• 47:19
  Speaker 5: Probably I wonder if they had that thought, Probably not
• 47:23
  Speaker 5: that exact thought, probably more like, oh, maybe there's there's
• 47:26
  Speaker 5: another headline in the news.
• 47:27
  Speaker 1: Now, Thank God, that's what a fucking blessing. Thank you Jesus,
• 47:32
  Speaker 1: My prayers have been answered.
• 47:37
  Speaker 3: Yeah.
• 47:38
  Speaker 1: I mean, so he crossed you.
• 47:41
  Speaker 3: Yeah he made that joke, and you know it was
• 47:43
  Speaker 3: like it was whatever, I mean, who cares that you
• 47:45
  Speaker 3: know that joke? I remember when I started doing open
• 47:48
  Speaker 3: mics in twenty eleven in New York. I would go
• 47:51
  Speaker 3: on and you could set your fucking clock to the
• 47:57
  Speaker 3: fact that the next comedian was going to come up
• 48:00
  Speaker 3: and say, how about that Duke lacrosse player that just went, yes,
• 48:05
  Speaker 3: how about that guy, and it was it was a
• 48:07
  Speaker 3: duke lacrosse joke based on how I looked every time.
• 48:12
  Speaker 5: You must look a lot like them.
• 48:13
  Speaker 10: No, I think it's just market.
• 48:15
  Speaker 3: I pad privilege. It's like white privileged douchebag. They didn't
• 48:19
  Speaker 3: I didn't say anything about playing lacrosse. I didn't say anything,
• 48:21
  Speaker 3: but they just say they're like, you know, it's low
• 48:23
  Speaker 3: hanging fruit. It's like, you know, and you.
• 48:26
  Speaker 1: Should have adopted a black scent to dodge the duke lacrosse.
• 48:30
  Speaker 3: Or like a southern like creole kind of playing.
• 48:35
  Speaker 5: You should have just started doing bits shitting on lacrosse
• 48:37
  Speaker 5: or like talk like Jaco and h oh no, who's
• 48:40
  Speaker 5: the dude, the white Gary.
• 48:43
  Speaker 1: He should have just gone get full GARYO.
• 48:46
  Speaker 5: Y'all motherfuckers look like you play lacrosse.
• 48:48
  Speaker 1: White boys love lass on lacrosse, the polo company. But
• 48:57
  Speaker 1: so what pissed you off? Then it's just like a
• 49:00
  Speaker 1: a at all.
• 49:01
  Speaker 3: No, it was that, uh that, And I'm sure you
• 49:04
  Speaker 3: know cover this at length throughout the week. But the
• 49:07
  Speaker 3: dude is just like doesn't get why he's been benched
• 49:14
  Speaker 3: and everybody knows and he knows why, but he refuses
• 49:17
  Speaker 3: to face that and nobody wants to spank him, then
• 49:23
  Speaker 3: I had to spank him. Yeah. That's because because at
• 49:27
  Speaker 3: some point, if we are all walking on eggshells around
• 49:31
  Speaker 3: this guy and no one wants to do the dirty work, all,
• 49:36
  Speaker 3: you know, I'm not above it.
• 49:38
  Speaker 1: Yeah, you're a great writer. And I like how he's
• 49:41
  Speaker 1: wrong in the felt of the couch, like his parents
• 49:43
  Speaker 1: are explaining to him why they're getting divorced.
• 49:47
  Speaker 3: Yeah, and people people are like, it's punching down. Okay,
• 49:50
  Speaker 3: I mean fine, I punch up, I punch down, I
• 49:53
  Speaker 3: punch across. I don't, I don't you know, I don't
• 49:55
  Speaker 3: fucking it's I select things that I feel strongly about,
• 49:59
  Speaker 3: and to he was holding the company hostage, how by
• 50:05
  Speaker 3: implying that, you know, if we came at him or
• 50:11
  Speaker 3: called him out for anything, he would do something dramatic.
• 50:15
  Speaker 3: And I don't think that that's fair. I don't think
• 50:18
  Speaker 3: that that that's you know, if I had known years
• 50:21
  Speaker 3: ago that holding a proverbial gun to my head translated
• 50:26
  Speaker 3: to job success at this company, I would have walked
• 50:29
  Speaker 3: in office. But like, just so you know, this is
• 50:32
  Speaker 3: there all the time. Try something. Yeah, I don't take
• 50:35
  Speaker 3: it down, it's there. Just just know that. And by
• 50:37
  Speaker 3: the way, how about a twenty five percent raise?
• 50:39
  Speaker 10: Yeah, dead girl's her blood is on my hands.
• 50:42
  Speaker 1: My blood's about to be on your hand. Yeah, big boy, Yeah, exactly,
• 50:46
  Speaker 1: try something.
• 50:46
  Speaker 3: I mean at that point, I was like, we're all
• 50:48
  Speaker 3: fucking suicidal here, you know.
• 50:50
  Speaker 1: And anyway, that was a funny part of the blog too.
• 50:53
  Speaker 3: I mean, look, I I unfortunately I can't even say that,
• 51:00
  Speaker 3: like I you know, I don't want anything bad to
• 51:05
  Speaker 3: happen to Chris, obviously, and I reached out to him
• 51:09
  Speaker 3: after I wrote the blog.
• 51:10
  Speaker 5: What did you say?
• 51:11
  Speaker 1: What did he say?
• 51:12
  Speaker 3: I said, Hey, man, I just want you to know
• 51:13
  Speaker 3: I wrote this blog, and uh, I'm sure you'll see
• 51:18
  Speaker 3: it and feel free to of course come back at me.
• 51:22
  Speaker 3: That's how it works. And no hard feelings, which is
• 51:26
  Speaker 3: county of me because what I wrote, I mean, you're
• 51:30
  Speaker 3: not going to not have hard feelings from that. But
• 51:34
  Speaker 3: I just I don't know, I wanted to.
• 51:35
  Speaker 1: Know feelings, like, no hard feelings from you. Hey, I
• 51:38
  Speaker 1: don't feel bad about what yeah, or like whatever I
• 51:42
  Speaker 1: feel you weren't hurt by what I said about you?
• 51:46
  Speaker 3: Yeah, whatever, You shouldn't have hard feelings whatever you choose
• 51:52
  Speaker 3: to write in response, I accept it is what it is.
• 51:55
  Speaker 3: I put myself. I've you know, but like I don't know.
• 52:01
  Speaker 3: You light a match, you're gonna get smoke. He he
• 52:04
  Speaker 3: put my name in his dog and whatever. Again, that's
• 52:09
  Speaker 3: not it to me. That's like a green light, but
• 52:13
  Speaker 3: it's not what gave me the gasoline.
• 52:17
  Speaker 1: I mean, you made content out of this. I think
• 52:20
  Speaker 1: that if you had said that shit to him privately,
• 52:22
  Speaker 1: it would have been way a way different story. That
• 52:25
  Speaker 1: would have been like nasty.
• 52:26
  Speaker 3: Some people can't. But I'm saying separate that, Like I
• 52:30
  Speaker 3: don't know Chris. I don't know him. I just know
• 52:35
  Speaker 3: I've what I've read that he's written, and I've seen
• 52:39
  Speaker 3: a lot of his sort of vibe and tone, and
• 52:44
  Speaker 3: that he would complain about not being invited to the
• 52:49
  Speaker 3: Bracketbusters in spite of his consistent I mean unwillingness to
• 52:59
  Speaker 3: reckon with his own actions. Uh puts. It makes the
• 53:04
  Speaker 3: company look bad. There's an omission there, there's like what
• 53:08
  Speaker 3: why aren't they People start to think, like what why
• 53:11
  Speaker 3: aren't they treating this guy fairly? It's like you fucking know, dude,
• 53:16
  Speaker 3: you fucking know, and you sit on a house of
• 53:19
  Speaker 3: cards and why are you rocking it?
• 53:23
  Speaker 1: Yeah, and you're pulling cards. Francis out here pulling cards?
• 53:26
  Speaker 1: SaaS final thoughts, Oh, no, I'm not none for me?
• 53:30
  Speaker 3: What is your issue here?
• 53:31
  Speaker 1: No?
• 53:32
  Speaker 5: I don't have any issues.
• 53:34
  Speaker 3: Do you have a take?
• 53:35
  Speaker 5: No, not at all.
• 53:37
  Speaker 3: We don't have to talk about this. This is barstool stuff.
• 53:39
  Speaker 3: That's not really what we do on this pod.
• 53:40
  Speaker 5: But no, this episode is going to be a heater.
• 53:43
  Speaker 5: I'm not even kidding.
• 53:44
  Speaker 3: Well, his story about Jake Joonhall.
• 53:46
  Speaker 5: Oh, and I'm just thinking about the combination of the two.
• 53:48
  Speaker 5: This might be our most viewed episode ever.
• 53:51
  Speaker 3: No.
• 53:51
  Speaker 10: Also, the Jake Jonhall stuff is fake?
• 53:54
  Speaker 3: No, of course, bruh cut that.
• 53:58
  Speaker 1: Of course it's just a good no.
• 54:03
  Speaker 5: Yeah, we're cutting that for sure. What the cut that
• 54:06
  Speaker 5: we have to that just actually ruined my day?
• 54:11
  Speaker 3: Welcome, Welcome to a fucking libel lawsuit.
• 54:15
  Speaker 1: That's why I said it was fake.
• 54:16
  Speaker 10: It's a joke on our joke podcast.
• 54:17
  Speaker 3: We cut that. Huh, we cut you saying it's fake.
• 54:21
  Speaker 1: So now you're holding a gun to my head?
• 54:23
  Speaker 3: What it rare to see you squirm?
• 54:26
  Speaker 5: You're squirming after that?
• 54:27
  Speaker 1: How am I squirming? I'm not squirming there.
• 54:32
  Speaker 5: That made you squirm.
• 54:33
  Speaker 1: This isn't squirming, bro.
• 54:35
  Speaker 5: You gotta make sacrifices, even if they're legal sacrifices.
• 54:37
  Speaker 1: I'm not squirming for this, But.
• 54:39
  Speaker 5: I know you wouldn't have cut it if it was
• 54:40
  Speaker 5: on pat BEV. That's for damn sure. I would have
• 54:42
  Speaker 5: said it would be seventeen they were. Those clips would
• 54:44
  Speaker 5: have been on ESPN, host of The Pat BEV Show
• 54:50
  Speaker 5: with Roan does Cocaine with Jake Jillenhall.
• 54:53
  Speaker 1: Outside the lines, Stephen A.
• 54:56
  Speaker 5: Smith would have been commenting on it. It is posterous
• 55:00
  Speaker 5: that a man like this thinks he can undertake a
• 55:04
  Speaker 5: nefarious deed.
• 55:11
  Speaker 1: Yeah, I don't know.
• 55:12
  Speaker 10: I don't know why Sassin being a little pussy about I.
• 55:15
  Speaker 5: Don't have anything to say. I don't have anything to add.
• 55:17
  Speaker 5: I don't really involve myself in that kind of stuff.
• 55:19
  Speaker 5: But so Chris, I don't have any advice to give.
• 55:24
  Speaker 5: I mean, well, usually when I get gone at in
• 55:26
  Speaker 5: the office, I just ignore it. Or I don't ignore it.
• 55:29
  Speaker 5: I read it multiple times, read every single comment involved
• 55:32
  Speaker 5: in it, but I never reply publicly and.
• 55:34
  Speaker 1: Just feel really bad about yourself, trying.
• 55:36
  Speaker 5: About myself, and then I push it down and then
• 55:39
  Speaker 5: the old persons ever actually came after me though. It
• 55:41
  Speaker 5: was Dave the Boss, which has been like three times.
• 55:45
  Speaker 5: But I just never reply, and I always sit there
• 55:47
  Speaker 5: and I think of replies and then I go, now,
• 55:49
  Speaker 5: I'm not gonna do that.
• 55:50
  Speaker 1: Barstool Tate said that he was going to write a
• 55:52
  Speaker 1: love letter to me and you if I hadn't like
• 55:56
  Speaker 1: he thought, I said bartool Tait instead of barstool state Tate.
• 56:00
  Speaker 1: I just fumbled the words while I was saying it.
• 56:03
  Speaker 1: But uh, I would have been interesting to see him
• 56:05
  Speaker 1: trying to come at you.
• 56:06
  Speaker 5: Yeah. I don't give a shit about that at all.
• 56:09
  Speaker 10: You had a fifteen minute phone conversation with him yesterday.
• 56:11
  Speaker 3: It's so funny. This is so funny. Oh he called
• 56:15
  Speaker 3: you after called me and I didn't have his number,
• 56:19
  Speaker 3: and then I went I thought it was Castellani calling me, uh,
• 56:24
  Speaker 3: because I didn't have the number. So I went over.
• 56:26
  Speaker 3: I went over to like, uh, Nate and that group,
• 56:30
  Speaker 3: and I said, does anyone know is this whose number
• 56:34
  Speaker 3: this is? And they put in their phone and Nate
• 56:36
  Speaker 3: had it and he was like, it's Tate. So then
• 56:39
  Speaker 3: I called him back and then we talked about a
• 56:43
  Speaker 3: potential collaborative He had a block idea you wanted.
• 56:46
  Speaker 1: The fuck is a collaborative blog. You write a word,
• 56:48
  Speaker 1: I write a word.
• 56:49
  Speaker 3: He kind of said, like swapping in tag team kind
• 56:53
  Speaker 3: of thing, and I was like okay, And then he
• 56:57
  Speaker 3: fucking posted the screenshot of like him receiving the call
• 57:04
  Speaker 3: from me and then tweeted it and said, uh, just
• 57:09
  Speaker 3: got off of a call with Francis, and he had
• 57:12
  Speaker 3: asked me if he could do that, and I was like, yeah, sure, whatever,
• 57:16
  Speaker 3: But I didn't know. I didn't know he was gonna
• 57:18
  Speaker 3: make it look like I called him and I only
• 57:23
  Speaker 3: called him because he had called me.
• 57:24
  Speaker 5: I was calling him back.
• 57:29
  Speaker 1: Francis can't stop calling me about this blog.
• 57:32
  Speaker 10: I guess I'll take it.
• 57:34
  Speaker 3: And then Kelly got mad at me. She's like, why
• 57:37
  Speaker 3: are you calling t It's like I didn't I returned
• 57:42
  Speaker 3: the call.
• 57:45
  Speaker 1: Larry David, Oh my god, it.
• 57:46
  Speaker 3: Was so funny.
• 57:48
  Speaker 10: That's some curb ship.
• 57:49
  Speaker 5: What did he was he calling you about the blog?
• 57:51
  Speaker 3: Yeah, about the he wanted about the blog idea of
• 57:54
  Speaker 3: the collaborative blog idea And then even wrote his rebuttal,
• 58:02
  Speaker 3: which was the title of which was Francis is right
• 58:05
  Speaker 3: and it was all this sort of sort of mopey,
• 58:08
  Speaker 3: self effacing.
• 58:10
  Speaker 10: He said that you were sucking your dog until in.
• 58:13
  Speaker 3: The middle of which he goes, look, I could have
• 58:17
  Speaker 3: taken a different route, I could have said, and then
• 58:19
  Speaker 3: he was like that he blah blah blah blah blah blah,
• 58:21
  Speaker 3: that he fucks his dog. And I hope his wife
• 58:25
  Speaker 3: gets sick with what, like the flu, just sick. I
• 58:31
  Speaker 3: don't think it's a common cold. When you wish illness
• 58:36
  Speaker 3: on someone's wife, I don't think it's like, I hope
• 58:40
  Speaker 3: she gets the.
• 58:40
  Speaker 1: Measle I hope she gets nausea, hartburn, indigestion, upset stomach
• 58:44
  Speaker 1: and diarrhea.
• 58:47
  Speaker 3: Hey fuck your what? Uh yeah? And I read that
• 58:51
  Speaker 3: and I was like, oh my god. You know, look,
• 58:55
  Speaker 3: I'm not gonna fucking I'm not gonna throw the shots
• 58:58
  Speaker 3: that I threw and then issue with that, but I
• 59:02
  Speaker 3: I was like, goodness me, you know, yeah, whoa, well
• 59:08
  Speaker 3: a little a little whoa. But again, I think it's
• 59:11
  Speaker 3: hypocritical to pretend that there's any line. I guess if
• 59:15
  Speaker 3: you right, he.
• 59:15
  Speaker 1: Could go at you like you know what I mean,
• 59:17
  Speaker 1: It all's fair when you're in you're and that's what
• 59:19
  Speaker 1: it comes down to you're both making content out of it.
• 59:22
  Speaker 1: If you were going at his person, calling his phone
• 59:25
  Speaker 1: for fifteen minutes and unloading this kind of thing, you'd
• 59:27
  Speaker 1: be an asshole. But like, we're in a business where
• 59:30
  Speaker 1: you make content out of the things like this.
• 59:33
  Speaker 3: Like, yeah, there is one other piece that he did
• 59:38
  Speaker 3: that was pretty nuts.
• 59:40
  Speaker 1: Say it.
• 59:42
  Speaker 3: He included in his first draft of the blog that
• 59:47
  Speaker 3: I he knew that I had harassed Breeze social girl
• 59:53
  Speaker 3: who's that Peyton, You harassed her? It's what he wrote.
• 59:57
  Speaker 5: Damn he knew that you were And then what the fuck?
• 1:00:00
  Speaker 3: Nate read it and was like what does this mean?
• 1:00:03
  Speaker 3: And I was like, hang on, And I went and
• 1:00:06
  Speaker 3: talked to Peyton, and I was like, hey, this is
• 1:00:10
  Speaker 3: really uncomfortable, but this is what he just said. I
• 1:00:14
  Speaker 3: don't know if I've ever made you feel uncomfortable and
• 1:00:20
  Speaker 3: harass you.
• 1:00:20
  Speaker 2: No.
• 1:00:21
  Speaker 3: I was very careful, you know, because no one has
• 1:00:24
  Speaker 3: ever accused me of anything like that. I've never heard that.
• 1:00:28
  Speaker 3: I've never really worried about that. And she was flabbergasted
• 1:00:35
  Speaker 3: and then like angry that he would just make that up.
• 1:00:40
  Speaker 3: And then she got another girl, Hannah, who's like the
• 1:00:44
  Speaker 3: head of their team involved, and then both of them
• 1:00:48
  Speaker 3: reached out to me and were like, we're going to
• 1:00:51
  Speaker 3: go to war for you if this comes out. That's crazy. Wow,
• 1:00:54
  Speaker 3: that's never in a million years have either of us
• 1:00:57
  Speaker 3: ever said that thought that.
• 1:00:59
  Speaker 10: I feel like you do tiktoks with them all the time.
• 1:01:02
  Speaker 1: They're hilarious.
• 1:01:04
  Speaker 3: Yes, And so then Nate pushed back on Chris a bit,
• 1:01:12
  Speaker 3: and then Chris took it out. But it's like, man,
• 1:01:16
  Speaker 3: you're fighting. That's fighting dirty, I think, yeah, just making
• 1:01:21
  Speaker 3: ship up. Yeah, that's to using the word harassment.
• 1:01:25
  Speaker 1: That's the H word. H is I mean outside of
• 1:01:29
  Speaker 1: f are and and these are the bad letters, and
• 1:01:36
  Speaker 1: H is like a tier right below. I mean, f
• 1:01:40
  Speaker 1: could be like five different things like crazy.
• 1:01:44
  Speaker 3: That's crazy, right, Oh, ship you you didn't have that.
• 1:01:50
  Speaker 5: I've never heard that.
• 1:01:55
  Speaker 3: Is that a new one?
• 1:01:56
  Speaker 5: You mean like a bundle of sticks a cigarette?
• 1:01:59
  Speaker 3: You think? England?
• 1:02:03
  Speaker 1: Interesting? Interesting? Interesting? I wonder why he would say that.
• 1:02:10
  Speaker 3: I think his back was to the wall. I think
• 1:02:13
  Speaker 3: he was cornered, Yeah, would be my guest. Yeah, I'm
• 1:02:18
  Speaker 3: sure all of this is going to come out.
• 1:02:21
  Speaker 5: I mean, well yeah, no, but tomorrow.
• 1:02:27
  Speaker 3: I think it'll be addressed. I want to I want
• 1:02:30
  Speaker 3: to address these things in front of the.
• 1:02:34
  Speaker 1: Senate. Yeah, I want to talk to him.
• 1:02:36
  Speaker 3: I want to talk about all of this and with
• 1:02:38
  Speaker 3: Dave and Whitney and Kirk.
• 1:02:42
  Speaker 1: Will they have you on?
• 1:02:43
  Speaker 3: I'm sure, I.
• 1:02:44
  Speaker 10: Mean sublime last day at the Celtics tonight.
• 1:02:47
  Speaker 1: I don't know.
• 1:02:48
  Speaker 3: Are you going with him?
• 1:02:49
  Speaker 1: Yeah? Me and run are gone feet on the hard
• 1:02:51
  Speaker 1: one best way to see the game, you know, way
• 1:02:57
  Speaker 1: to be back on the paint, the parquet.
• 1:03:00
  Speaker 3: Are you going to Knicks or or Celtics? Are you
• 1:03:03
  Speaker 3: going to Boston?
• 1:03:05
  Speaker 10: That's why I have to leave it.
• 1:03:07
  Speaker 3: You're going with Dave court side to Celtics.
• 1:03:10
  Speaker 10: Celtics Bucks.
• 1:03:11
  Speaker 3: That's sick.
• 1:03:12
  Speaker 1: I don't know. It was a surprise.
• 1:03:13
  Speaker 5: Celtics are pix hundred six minus six hundred.
• 1:03:17
  Speaker 3: Jesus Christ, that's crazy.
• 1:03:20
  Speaker 5: Yeah, ten and a half point favorites.
• 1:03:23
  Speaker 1: Honest is out? Okay, fine, honest is out?
• 1:03:26
  Speaker 3: Fair enough?
• 1:03:26
  Speaker 5: They would have been minus three hundred if Celtics are.
• 1:03:28
  Speaker 3: Having a big season, incredible season to make it to
• 1:03:31
  Speaker 3: the Eastern Conference Finals and lose to.
• 1:03:34
  Speaker 1: The I mean it would be great if you lost
• 1:03:38
  Speaker 1: your to our co worker, if the Celtics lost to
• 1:03:41
  Speaker 1: our co worker, you're gonna be fucking court side.
• 1:03:45
  Speaker 3: I don't get playoff tickets. Oh really one game of
• 1:03:47
  Speaker 3: year usually, so I don't have it come tonight. I
• 1:03:52
  Speaker 3: have to wait.
• 1:03:53
  Speaker 5: I would go tonight.
• 1:03:55
  Speaker 3: Yeah. Yeah.
• 1:03:58
  Speaker 5: You like the Celtics from Yeah, but you don't like
• 1:04:01
  Speaker 5: the Patriots.
• 1:04:02
  Speaker 3: I have a weird mixed fan base or fan allegiance,
• 1:04:05
  Speaker 3: but there are reasons for it.
• 1:04:07
  Speaker 1: You like the Celtics not in Utah.
• 1:04:10
  Speaker 5: That's well done, killer, Congrats you're in the two fifty.
• 1:04:16
  Speaker 1: Welcome you get tapped on the shoulder like it's the illuminati. Dude.
• 1:04:21
  Speaker 1: I had a fucking dream the other night that we
• 1:04:25
  Speaker 1: were doing the NFL Draft show here and I and
• 1:04:29
  Speaker 1: John Stewart was on the panel, and I was interviewing
• 1:04:33
  Speaker 1: John Stewart and he like during the interview, he was
• 1:04:37
  Speaker 1: like being so nice to me, and he was like,
• 1:04:39
  Speaker 1: you're so you're so good at this job, like you're
• 1:04:42
  Speaker 1: fucking crushing it, like I need like you get it
• 1:04:47
  Speaker 1: at a level that these other guys don't, basically, And
• 1:04:50
  Speaker 1: I woke up from the dream and I felt so
• 1:04:54
  Speaker 1: good that John Stewart had said those things about me,
• 1:04:57
  Speaker 1: and then I realized it was a dream. And then
• 1:05:00
  Speaker 1: I realized John Stewart doesn't think those things about me.
• 1:05:04
  Speaker 1: That's what I think about myself. That's my subconscious talking
• 1:05:13
  Speaker 1: to me. And I got so sad and so fucking
• 1:05:17
  Speaker 1: down on myself.
• 1:05:18
  Speaker 5: I've had that exact same dream, but it was me
• 1:05:21
  Speaker 5: and uh Glenn Howard and and he was like, you're so,
• 1:05:25
  Speaker 5: I've seen all of your ship. You're hilarious. You gotta
• 1:05:28
  Speaker 5: get you in the show. And then I woke up
• 1:05:30
  Speaker 5: and I was pissed. The most pissed I've ever been
• 1:05:32
  Speaker 5: after dream is when I was dating Sydney Sweeney and yes,
• 1:05:34
  Speaker 5: and I was like, you gotta be fucking shitting.
• 1:05:38
  Speaker 3: You.
• 1:05:38
  Speaker 1: Put your feet down onto your sticky ass floor.
• 1:05:41
  Speaker 5: I got a bed fra him finally.
• 1:05:43
  Speaker 3: Yeah.
• 1:05:43
  Speaker 5: Yeah, I slept above the ground for the first time
• 1:05:45
  Speaker 5: in a year last night.
• 1:05:46
  Speaker 1: The rats must have been pissed.
• 1:05:48
  Speaker 5: They had to find a new home.
• 1:05:49
  Speaker 1: What are we to eat?
• 1:05:51
  Speaker 3: Just shivering?
• 1:05:52
  Speaker 1: Yeah? Cool? Where are we gonna go?
• 1:05:55
  Speaker 3: Where?
• 1:05:56
  Speaker 5: You wasn't that It wasn't even It was the exact
• 1:05:58
  Speaker 5: same amount of comfort. Yeah, I guess it was nice
• 1:06:02
  Speaker 5: to not be on the ground.
• 1:06:04
  Speaker 1: Yeah, elevated literally the mattress.
• 1:06:06
  Speaker 5: Was the same amount of comfort.
• 1:06:07
  Speaker 3: I got a mattress.
• 1:06:08
  Speaker 5: Yeah, I thought the bed, the bed frame would support.
• 1:06:12
  Speaker 5: Would you have a little bit more cushion, perhaps better
• 1:06:15
  Speaker 5: than the floor. M I've been waking up on my
• 1:06:19
  Speaker 5: shoulder hurts.
• 1:06:20
  Speaker 1: That's age on my side. That's you just you're just
• 1:06:22
  Speaker 1: getting older. You gotta start stretching. Nah, you're not gonna
• 1:06:26
  Speaker 1: do that. But it is wild. That's just their dreams
• 1:06:29
  Speaker 1: are your body like in mind affirming yourself.
• 1:06:33
  Speaker 5: Yeah, what'd you take before your dream? Not the damn
• 1:06:36
  Speaker 5: a drug induced?
• 1:06:37
  Speaker 10: Now just being off the weed. I just have been
• 1:06:40
  Speaker 10: on that ship.
• 1:06:41
  Speaker 5: No cush not even a little bit.
• 1:06:43
  Speaker 1: God, No, I drank a CBD drink, not even no THHD.
• 1:06:48
  Speaker 1: Made sure that there's no THHC in it. No, like
• 1:06:50
  Speaker 1: three nights ago, and it had it had me, Uh,
• 1:06:53
  Speaker 1: it had me like feeling paranoid. I thought CBD was
• 1:06:56
  Speaker 1: supposed to calm you down. It had me like jittery,
• 1:06:59
  Speaker 1: like I was like too high. I know I'm gonna
• 1:07:01
  Speaker 1: come back to weed and I'm gonna be a pussy.
• 1:07:03
  Speaker 1: I know that that shit is gonna whip my ass.
• 1:07:07
  Speaker 1: I don't know at the latest, Memorial Day, maybe before then.
• 1:07:13
  Speaker 1: Memorial Day.
• 1:07:14
  Speaker 5: How come you get to quit weed and no one cares.
• 1:07:16
  Speaker 5: But when I said I was quitting drinking, it was
• 1:07:18
  Speaker 5: like a fucking no, you're not.
• 1:07:20
  Speaker 1: You're not allowed to because I always said I was
• 1:07:23
  Speaker 1: coming back and you were like, I'm fucking done for good. Interesting,
• 1:07:28
  Speaker 1: I could come back at any time.
• 1:07:30
  Speaker 5: Yeah, what about right now? Where's the cush I'll get
• 1:07:33
  Speaker 5: some right now. I gotta go take a flight. Actually, yeah, exactly.
• 1:07:37
  Speaker 1: The last thing I want to do is be paranoid
• 1:07:39
  Speaker 1: on the way to the airport, thinking I'll be late,
• 1:07:41
  Speaker 1: and then as the plane takes off, palm sweaty aren't
• 1:07:44
  Speaker 1: heavy mom spaghetti fucking thinking the plane's gonna crash.
• 1:07:48
  Speaker 5: Well, that flight is thirty minutes long, so I think
• 1:07:51
  Speaker 5: you'd be good. I don't even know if it goes
• 1:07:53
  Speaker 5: all the way off.
• 1:07:55
  Speaker 1: Yeah, they depressurize the cabin.
• 1:07:58
  Speaker 3: Yeah what Yeah, you're fine.
• 1:08:02
  Speaker 1: You get to get there.
• 1:08:02
  Speaker 3: You gotta know you gotta go in like five minutes
• 1:08:04
  Speaker 3: or so.
• 1:08:04
  Speaker 1: Yeah, I got the uber.
• 1:08:06
  Speaker 5: The time is your flight?
• 1:08:07
  Speaker 3: This this sperm blood thing?
• 1:08:08
  Speaker 10: Yes, I need to hear about it.
• 1:08:10
  Speaker 1: Take your time because I'm on no rush.
• 1:08:12
  Speaker 10: I'll miss this flight.
• 1:08:13
  Speaker 5: There.
• 1:08:13
  Speaker 3: So there's so many things that I just like the
• 1:08:16
  Speaker 3: hysterical that I want to work my way through.
• 1:08:19
  Speaker 1: But yeah, tell, tell the whole thing. You go in
• 1:08:22
  Speaker 1: and best episode of all time maybe the banger so stid,
• 1:08:25
  Speaker 1: let's give the people a treat.
• 1:08:27
  Speaker 3: Well, you they know, you know, every man is in there.
• 1:08:31
  Speaker 3: I think most of the men that are in there
• 1:08:33
  Speaker 3: are there for the same reason. It's to have a
• 1:08:35
  Speaker 3: semen analysis. And so there's like five dudes sitting by themselves.
• 1:08:40
  Speaker 1: What's their energy.
• 1:08:42
  Speaker 3: It's a little bit like we're all waiting to go
• 1:08:47
  Speaker 3: do something shameful.
• 1:08:48
  Speaker 5: Well, that's what it is, even.
• 1:08:50
  Speaker 3: Though it's for medical purposes. Uh, every guy in there,
• 1:08:55
  Speaker 3: you can almost see them flicking through the porn scene
• 1:08:59
  Speaker 3: they want to download on their phone in their head.
• 1:09:03
  Speaker 3: And that's what we're all about to do. We're five
• 1:09:06
  Speaker 3: minutes away from jerking off, and it's known. There's a
• 1:09:12
  Speaker 3: an air, a fog of anticipatory masturbation linking us all.
• 1:09:18
  Speaker 3: And I thought it would be funny because they had
• 1:09:21
  Speaker 3: this bench seating along the window and guys were as
• 1:09:24
  Speaker 3: spread out as possible. It was as if it was
• 1:09:27
  Speaker 3: like an airport urine old thing, And I thought it
• 1:09:29
  Speaker 3: would be funny to get really cozy with some of them, really,
• 1:09:33
  Speaker 3: did you you got a do you have any idea?
• 1:09:36
  Speaker 3: What the record is?
• 1:09:39
  Speaker 10: Which way now?
• 1:09:40
  Speaker 1: Faster? Slow?
• 1:09:41
  Speaker 3: The other part of it was I had I had driven,
• 1:09:44
  Speaker 3: which is why it took me so fucking long to
• 1:09:46
  Speaker 3: get here, and because it was all the way up
• 1:09:48
  Speaker 3: the Upper east Side, and so I parked in a
• 1:09:49
  Speaker 3: parking garage. And in New York City they do those
• 1:09:52
  Speaker 3: half hour specials. If you're in and out in half
• 1:09:54
  Speaker 3: an hour, it's, you know, eighteen dollars. Anything over half
• 1:09:58
  Speaker 3: an hour goes all the way to fifty five Jesus,
• 1:10:00
  Speaker 3: from fucking thirty one minutes to twenty four hours, it's
• 1:10:04
  Speaker 3: the same prices. They must know.
• 1:10:05
  Speaker 1: They're next to the jerk off station.
• 1:10:06
  Speaker 3: Yeah, it's crazy. And so I am watching and I'm
• 1:10:11
  Speaker 3: like waiting for them to call my name, and I'm like,
• 1:10:13
  Speaker 3: this is gonna have to be a quick one. I'm
• 1:10:15
  Speaker 3: gonna have to really get get this, get in and
• 1:10:18
  Speaker 3: out in order to pay less for parking. So I'm
• 1:10:22
  Speaker 3: on the clock here and so they give they bring
• 1:10:26
  Speaker 3: you into your room, and it's weird. It's weird.
• 1:10:30
  Speaker 5: Other magazines.
• 1:10:31
  Speaker 3: They hear DVDs, they're fucking DVDs. And then headphones, and
• 1:10:38
  Speaker 3: I was like, get the fuck out of here.
• 1:10:41
  Speaker 10: The headphones that someone's take.
• 1:10:44
  Speaker 3: Off the headphones, big over ear headphones.
• 1:10:48
  Speaker 5: Did you take any photos?
• 1:10:50
  Speaker 1: No?
• 1:10:50
  Speaker 3: No, there's a chair. There's a chair that looks like
• 1:10:54
  Speaker 3: almost like a barber chair. I think it reclines a little.
• 1:10:56
  Speaker 3: I didn't touch it. And then they've put the sterilized
• 1:11:00
  Speaker 3: paper on just the seat but not the back. I'm like,
• 1:11:06
  Speaker 3: I'm I'm we're gonna be standing for this. Oh my god,
• 1:11:09
  Speaker 3: we're gonna.
• 1:11:10
  Speaker 10: Worry about the guys that need to lie down.
• 1:11:13
  Speaker 1: What are they to do?
• 1:11:14
  Speaker 3: It was too small to like what it was, way
• 1:11:17
  Speaker 3: too small of a room to lie down? What kind
• 1:11:18
  Speaker 3: of phone booth are you in? And there's a woman
• 1:11:21
  Speaker 3: who's standing in the doorway giving you instructions and how high?
• 1:11:24
  Speaker 3: All right, here's your sample? Not not at all?
• 1:11:28
  Speaker 1: Four?
• 1:11:29
  Speaker 5: Did she stay in the doorway the whole time?
• 1:11:31
  Speaker 10: I wish she's gonna hate to hear this.
• 1:11:34
  Speaker 3: Yeah, well I don't.
• 1:11:35
  Speaker 1: Her and Jillenhall are going to be steaming at this episode.
• 1:11:38
  Speaker 3: Yeah, so they she's giving you all these instructions like
• 1:11:41
  Speaker 3: you need to h if you if you don't collect
• 1:11:44
  Speaker 3: all of the sample and some of it goes missing.
• 1:11:46
  Speaker 3: You need to mark this bok. I'm like, I'm not
• 1:11:49
  Speaker 3: a magician.
• 1:11:51
  Speaker 1: One sperm wasn't labeled one, one was labeled three, and
• 1:11:54
  Speaker 1: they couldn't find two.
• 1:11:55
  Speaker 3: Heading for the East River, Like what the fuck are
• 1:11:57
  Speaker 3: we talking about? And then it's like mark your number
• 1:12:02
  Speaker 3: of days of abstinence, and then all these things, and
• 1:12:06
  Speaker 3: then like right on the cup itself, the time you
• 1:12:09
  Speaker 3: have to mark the time that you actually hit hit
• 1:12:13
  Speaker 3: you know, not jet, not the bottom of the cup.
• 1:12:17
  Speaker 3: We'll get in there, and I'm like, I'm not doing
• 1:12:20
  Speaker 3: the DVDs, although there was a part of me that
• 1:12:22
  Speaker 3: was like should I. This is old school, there's a
• 1:12:26
  Speaker 3: culture here.
• 1:12:27
  Speaker 1: But then they'll like, see what the minute marker on
• 1:12:30
  Speaker 1: the DVD is that you came.
• 1:12:32
  Speaker 3: I stand in the footsteps of giants, like I should,
• 1:12:36
  Speaker 3: as many have come before me. Quite literally, I should
• 1:12:40
  Speaker 3: I should do the DVD. This a there's a sanctity
• 1:12:43
  Speaker 3: to this, there's like a I don't know a custom.
• 1:12:46
  Speaker 1: But then they find out that you started coming before,
• 1:12:49
  Speaker 1: like during the plotline of the before anyone was even nude,
• 1:12:54
  Speaker 1: especially DVD port.
• 1:12:56
  Speaker 3: So then I just pulled up my phone and I
• 1:12:59
  Speaker 3: started to think about like, what what you know? How
• 1:13:01
  Speaker 3: dark are we going with this scene? And I just
• 1:13:04
  Speaker 3: went to an old basic favorite.
• 1:13:05
  Speaker 1: Oh bro, you should have gone as dark as possible
• 1:13:08
  Speaker 1: so you could give your best best coming.
• 1:13:10
  Speaker 3: I worried a load worried about that. But I also
• 1:13:14
  Speaker 3: I'm wearing boots, and given the timing of the parking,
• 1:13:18
  Speaker 3: I didn't want to unlace my boots and then take
• 1:13:21
  Speaker 3: my very stiff work like trousers off. I've gotten to
• 1:13:24
  Speaker 3: this workwear American workwar thing, and I keep buying pants
• 1:13:28
  Speaker 3: that one would buy if you worked on a railroad
• 1:13:31
  Speaker 3: or shingling roofs chimney to break in. And I don't
• 1:13:37
  Speaker 3: know why I do that, but that's my look right now.
• 1:13:39
  Speaker 3: Good look, I'll tell you man. It is tough to
• 1:13:43
  Speaker 3: jerk off in these pants.
• 1:13:45
  Speaker 1: So you just had them at your ankles like a
• 1:13:47
  Speaker 1: toddler urnal I had.
• 1:13:49
  Speaker 3: I had them up all the way up. I did
• 1:13:52
  Speaker 3: take my shirt off.
• 1:13:54
  Speaker 5: That's crazy, that's insane.
• 1:13:56
  Speaker 3: Everything would drooping down.
• 1:13:59
  Speaker 1: I had to. I had to just in case the
• 1:14:01
  Speaker 1: nurse came in.
• 1:14:02
  Speaker 5: Yeah, lock the door, and then you were definitely just
• 1:14:06
  Speaker 5: looking in the mirror. There was no mirror like American Psychic.
• 1:14:10
  Speaker 3: There was not a mirror you wish. And by the way,
• 1:14:12
  Speaker 3: you're thinking a little too hard about this painting your
• 1:14:17
  Speaker 3: own picture.
• 1:14:17
  Speaker 5: It's just so fucking weird.
• 1:14:19
  Speaker 3: Well I agree, well this is weird. This is not
• 1:14:23
  Speaker 3: how I.
• 1:14:25
  Speaker 5: I jerk off pretty much with like snow pants and
• 1:14:27
  Speaker 5: a jacket on.
• 1:14:28
  Speaker 3: You fish it out of your fly and keep the
• 1:14:30
  Speaker 3: button done.
• 1:14:31
  Speaker 1: You just hear the rustling of the snow pants.
• 1:14:35
  Speaker 5: Did anyone could you hear anyone like yelling.
• 1:14:38
  Speaker 3: Fastasses the minefield of razor burn that surrounds and mumps
• 1:14:44
  Speaker 3: and lumps that he's got.
• 1:14:46
  Speaker 1: Yeah, you should have.
• 1:14:47
  Speaker 5: You should have let out some loud ass. Mo.
• 1:14:49
  Speaker 3: Well, so this was dude. There were people walking by
• 1:14:54
  Speaker 3: right outside the door. Yeah, male nurses, And I was like,
• 1:14:59
  Speaker 3: I never doctors, you mean, I think it was really
• 1:15:05
  Speaker 3: people who are collect you know, coming in to just
• 1:15:08
  Speaker 3: take the paperwork from me. So then so then they
• 1:15:12
  Speaker 3: uh you finished.
• 1:15:13
  Speaker 1: I was just making a joke about the viability of
• 1:15:16
  Speaker 1: a male being a nurse.
• 1:15:18
  Speaker 5: That would just be a doctor, right, totally surgeon at
• 1:15:21
  Speaker 5: least that you have to assume.
• 1:15:23
  Speaker 3: Yeah, yeah, yeah, So you put it in the cop
• 1:15:26
  Speaker 3: you do it up, you write your time, and then
• 1:15:29
  Speaker 3: she comes you ring a doorbell, they come, they put
• 1:15:32
  Speaker 3: gloves on, they take it from you.
• 1:15:34
  Speaker 1: And then imagine the smell of those rooms that these
• 1:15:37
  Speaker 1: women are walking into, like the fucking cherry blossoms are blooming.
• 1:15:42
  Speaker 3: I mean, I left my room cleaner than it was.
• 1:15:45
  Speaker 3: I took the camping mindset to.
• 1:15:47
  Speaker 1: That, right. You don't want to leave a scrap behind, Yeah,
• 1:15:51
  Speaker 1: but I mean the smell, though, you can't clean up
• 1:15:52
  Speaker 1: the smell.
• 1:15:55
  Speaker 8: No, But I.
• 1:15:57
  Speaker 3: What is come have quite a punch and smell.
• 1:16:01
  Speaker 1: I mean there's trees that they call come trees.
• 1:16:03
  Speaker 5: Like a weird thing that people talk about that I've
• 1:16:04
  Speaker 5: never understood.
• 1:16:05
  Speaker 1: I think ten percent. It's like asparagus. Only ten percent
• 1:16:08
  Speaker 1: of the population can't smell the cum smell. You're probably
• 1:16:10
  Speaker 1: in the ten percent.
• 1:16:13
  Speaker 5: I must speak.
• 1:16:14
  Speaker 1: You'd be terrible at an SVU.
• 1:16:17
  Speaker 3: But then then I went and got and I got
• 1:16:19
  Speaker 3: blood drawn three minutes later, and the woman sets me down.
• 1:16:23
  Speaker 3: What's the word for a woman who does takes blood? Nurse? Anyway,
• 1:16:30
  Speaker 3: She goes which arm, and I was like, well, I
• 1:16:32
  Speaker 3: use my right, and she didn't laugh and did my left.
• 1:16:40
  Speaker 3: And that was my joke that I thought really was
• 1:16:42
  Speaker 3: gonna land.
• 1:16:44
  Speaker 10: It is funny, but she didn't like it.
• 1:16:47
  Speaker 3: She didn't like it. Something told me she'd heard it before. Yeah,
• 1:16:52
  Speaker 3: she was not moved to giggles.
• 1:16:55
  Speaker 1: I mean, women like that have to just be able
• 1:16:58
  Speaker 1: to in a profession like that, feel like that. You
• 1:17:01
  Speaker 1: should be trying to alleviate any of the pressure at
• 1:17:04
  Speaker 1: any time. You shouldn't be making it more shameful for
• 1:17:07
  Speaker 1: the boys coming out fucking freshly combed.
• 1:17:09
  Speaker 3: Dude. Bro then as she puts the needle in, I
• 1:17:13
  Speaker 3: hate giving blood and or tapping blood taken. And uh,
• 1:17:17
  Speaker 3: she's telling me about the billing process. She's like, make
• 1:17:23
  Speaker 3: sure you submit your insurance card when you go back
• 1:17:26
  Speaker 3: up front, because, uh, the STD scan that we do,
• 1:17:30
  Speaker 3: which is standard, is covered. But if you're doing genetic
• 1:17:35
  Speaker 3: testing sometimes that it's out of network and that can
• 1:17:38
  Speaker 3: be two hundred and fifty dollars. And I'm not sure.
• 1:17:41
  Speaker 3: I'm like, don't you're not helping with my anxiety of
• 1:17:45
  Speaker 3: the fact that blood is coming out of my arm
• 1:17:47
  Speaker 3: right now?
• 1:17:49
  Speaker 1: Yeah, I mean, hearing about billing information as you're fucking
• 1:17:53
  Speaker 1: about to pass out. Yeah, I guess I.
• 1:17:55
  Speaker 5: Would have rest of that than the fucking what the
• 1:17:57
  Speaker 5: dude was saying to me.
• 1:17:59
  Speaker 3: Oh, yeah, well it's not. I wasn't competing with you.
• 1:18:03
  Speaker 5: No, I'm not. I didn'y think you were the guy
• 1:18:06
  Speaker 5: When I got my blood drown the guy was like,
• 1:18:08
  Speaker 5: you're you're not gonna freak out, are you? And I
• 1:18:10
  Speaker 5: was like no, he's like the last person here freaked
• 1:18:12
  Speaker 5: out passed out?
• 1:18:15
  Speaker 1: Is that a freak out? Even?
• 1:18:16
  Speaker 10: I feel like that's involuntary, Like.
• 1:18:18
  Speaker 5: They said they weren't going to freak out and then
• 1:18:19
  Speaker 5: they freaked out, and I was like, yeah, I don't
• 1:18:22
  Speaker 5: know what you're what are you You're trying to make
• 1:18:23
  Speaker 5: me freak out? I said I wasn't gonna freak out,
• 1:18:26
  Speaker 5: and are you sure sure about that? The last person
• 1:18:29
  Speaker 5: said they weren't going to freak out and they did.
• 1:18:31
  Speaker 1: Well, then what what if you said you were going
• 1:18:32
  Speaker 1: to freak out? What the fuck would they do different?
• 1:18:34
  Speaker 5: I don't know what the point of the question was.
• 1:18:35
  Speaker 1: They're trying to freak you out, yeah, exactly, They're trying
• 1:18:38
  Speaker 1: to pass you out. Yeah, they were trying to pass
• 1:18:41
  Speaker 1: you out too, Francis by that billing information. Maybe they're
• 1:18:43
  Speaker 1: just trying to distract you.
• 1:18:45
  Speaker 5: By the way, this is going to cost ten thousand
• 1:18:48
  Speaker 5: dollars you need to go? Yeah, you do need to go?
• 1:18:51
  Speaker 1: Did you get my sperm checked? No to you gotta go?
• 1:18:55
  Speaker 5: Dude, isn't you an hour and a half?
• 1:18:57
  Speaker 3: It is? They hit a piano in the waiting room.
• 1:18:59
  Speaker 3: I thought about playing it.
• 1:19:00
  Speaker 5: That would be hilarious and singing.
• 1:19:02
  Speaker 3: Some song about like take it easy boy, don't use
• 1:19:08
  Speaker 3: the DVD player.
• 1:19:09
  Speaker 5: You should have just gone up and sang piano.
• 1:19:11
  Speaker 3: Man, get a sing along. Yeh, that's a funny scene.
• 1:19:15
  Speaker 5: Man, What are you doing here?
• 1:19:18
  Speaker 10: All right? I'm smashing the uber?
• 1:19:20
  Speaker 5: All right, good luck. I guess we can end the episode.
• 1:19:22
  Speaker 3: Right. It feels like I don't know how long you
• 1:19:25
  Speaker 3: guys went before I got here, but.
• 1:19:26
  Speaker 5: It feel like I've been going for a while.
• 1:19:28
  Speaker 3: Hold then, all right, all right, say you guys all
• 1:19:30
  Speaker 3: for listening. I'll be in Salt Lake this weekend. Tickets
• 1:19:35
  Speaker 3: at Francis Elles dot com. Come to wise, guys, Jordan Landing,
• 1:19:38
  Speaker 3: Let's have ann beer.
• 1:19:40
  Speaker 5: I will be in Irvine, California on Thursday for one
• 1:19:44
  Speaker 5: show and then two shows in.
• 1:19:45
  Speaker 1: Baker's Field on Friday and Saturday.
• 1:19:48
  Speaker 3: Goodbye, Oh.
• 1:19:50
  Speaker 5: Tickets on a Little Sasquatch website dot com.