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Are Your Parents A Financial Train Wreck? · Becoming Financially Confident

• 0:37
  What
• 0:37
  happens
• 0:38
  when
• 0:38
  you
• 0:38
  slowly
• 0:39
  realize
• 0:39
  your
• 0:39
  parents
• 0:40
  may
• 0:40
  not
• 0:40
  be
• 0:40
  financially
• 0:41
  okay?
• 0:42
  Not
• 0:42
  someday.
• 0:43
  I'm
• 0:43
  talking
• 0:43
  about
• 0:44
  right
• 0:44
  now.
• 0:45
  In
• 0:46
  this
• 0:46
  episode,
• 0:46
  I
• 0:46
  talk
• 0:46
  with
• 0:47
  someone
• 0:47
  who
• 0:47
  can't
• 0:47
  stop
• 0:48
  thinking
• 0:48
  about
• 0:48
  where
• 0:48
  this
• 0:49
  is
• 0:49
  all
• 0:49
  heading
• 0:50
  after
• 0:50
  watching
• 0:51
  their
• 0:51
  parents
• 0:51
  sell
• 0:51
  their
• 0:52
  house,
• 0:52
  live
• 0:53
  out
• 0:53
  of
• 0:53
  a
• 0:53
  van
• 0:53
  for
• 0:54
  years
• 0:54
  and
• 0:55
  avoid
• 0:55
  talking
• 0:56
  honestly
• 0:56
  about
• 0:56
  money.
• 0:57
  Now
• 0:58
  from
• 0:58
  the
• 0:58
  outside,
• 0:59
  it
• 0:59
  looks
• 0:59
  like
• 0:59
  they're
• 0:59
  trying
• 1:00
  to
• 1:00
  make
• 1:00
  it
• 1:00
  work.
• 1:01
  But
• 1:01
  underneath
• 1:02
  is
• 1:02
  this
• 1:02
  growing
• 1:03
  fear
• 1:03
  and
• 1:04
  uncertainty
• 1:05
  and
• 1:05
  pressure.
• 1:06
  And
• 1:06
  the
• 1:06
  hardest
• 1:07
  part,
• 1:07
  they're
• 1:08
  starting
• 1:08
  to
• 1:08
  wonder
• 1:08
  if
• 1:08
  this
• 1:09
  eventually
• 1:09
  becomes
• 1:09
  their
• 1:10
  responsibility
• 1:10
  to
• 1:11
  fix.
• 1:12
  How
• 1:12
  do
• 1:12
  you
• 1:12
  carry
• 1:13
  concern
• 1:13
  for
• 1:13
  the
• 1:14
  people
• 1:14
  you
• 1:14
  love
• 1:15
  without
• 1:15
  lettingly
• 1:16
  quietly
• 1:16
  take
• 1:17
  over
• 1:17
  your
• 1:17
  life?
• 1:18
  That's
• 1:18
  what
• 1:19
  we're
• 1:19
  going
• 1:19
  to
• 1:19
  talk
• 1:19
  about
• 1:19
  on
• 1:19
  today's
• 1:20
  show.
• 1:20
  Going
• 1:20
  to
• 1:20
  be
• 1:20
  a
• 1:20
  great
• 1:21
  one
• 1:21
  today.
• 1:30
  Hello
• 1:31
  friend.
• 1:31
  Ralph
• 1:32
  Estep
• 1:32
  Jr.
• 1:32
  Here.
• 1:33
  This
• 1:33
  is
• 1:33
  financially
• 1:34
  confident
• 1:34
  Christian
• 1:35
  where
• 1:36
  every
• 1:36
  day
• 1:36
  my
• 1:36
  goal
• 1:37
  is
• 1:37
  to
• 1:37
  help
• 1:37
  you
• 1:37
  break
• 1:38
  that
• 1:38
  cycle
• 1:38
  of
• 1:39
  financial
• 1:39
  shame
• 1:40
  and
• 1:40
  live
• 1:40
  with
• 1:41
  confidence.
• 1:41
  Now
• 1:42
  we
• 1:42
  got
• 1:42
  a
• 1:42
  voicemail
• 1:43
  today
• 1:43
  that
• 1:43
  you
• 1:44
  are
• 1:44
  not
• 1:44
  going
• 1:44
  to
• 1:44
  believe.
• 1:45
  We're
• 1:46
  going
• 1:46
  to
• 1:46
  be
• 1:46
  talking
• 1:46
  today
• 1:46
  about
• 1:47
  how
• 1:47
  to
• 1:48
  handle
• 1:48
  stress
• 1:48
  about
• 1:49
  your
• 1:49
  parents
• 1:49
  financial
• 1:50
  future.
• 1:51
  So
• 1:51
  I
• 1:51
  want
• 1:51
  to
• 1:51
  get
• 1:52
  right
• 1:52
  in
• 1:52
  today's
• 1:53
  listener
• 1:53
  question.
• 1:54
  Ralph
• 1:54
  I'm
• 1:55
  losing
• 1:55
  it
• 1:55
  over
• 1:56
  this
• 1:56
  and
• 1:56
  I
• 1:56
  don't
• 1:57
  know
• 1:57
  what
• 1:57
  to
• 1:57
  do.
• 1:58
  My
• 1:58
  parents
• 1:59
  are
• 1:59
  in
• 1:59
  their
• 1:59
  late
• 2:00
  60s
• 2:00
  with
• 2:01
  zero
• 2:01
  retirement
• 2:02
  savings
• 2:02
  and
• 2:02
  no
• 2:03
  jobs.
• 2:04
  They
• 2:04
  sold
• 2:04
  their
• 2:05
  house,
• 2:05
  moved
• 2:05
  to
• 2:06
  a
• 2:06
  new
• 2:06
  state
• 2:06
  and
• 2:06
  they've
• 2:07
  been
• 2:07
  living
• 2:07
  in
• 2:08
  a
• 2:08
  van
• 2:09
  for
• 2:09
  almost
• 2:09
  two
• 2:10
  years.
• 2:11
  A
• 2:12
  van
• 2:14
  trying
• 2:14
  to
• 2:14
  find
• 2:15
  a
• 2:15
  home
• 2:15
  they
• 2:15
  can
• 2:15
  afford
• 2:16
  while
• 2:16
  their
• 2:16
  savings
• 2:17
  drain
• 2:18
  faster
• 2:18
  every
• 2:18
  month.
• 2:20
  I
• 2:20
  know
• 2:20
  the
• 2:20
  money
• 2:21
  from
• 2:21
  the
• 2:21
  house
• 2:21
  sale
• 2:22
  is
• 2:22
  basically
• 2:22
  gone.
• 2:23
  I
• 2:23
  know
• 2:24
  it.
• 2:24
  But
• 2:25
  they
• 2:25
  won't
• 2:25
  actually
• 2:25
  tell
• 2:26
  me.
• 2:26
  The
• 2:26
  numbers
• 2:27
  won't
• 2:27
  be
• 2:27
  straight
• 2:28
  with
• 2:28
  me
• 2:29
  and
• 2:29
  I'm
• 2:29
  hours
• 2:30
  away.
• 2:30
  So
• 2:31
  I
• 2:31
  can't
• 2:31
  just
• 2:31
  show
• 2:31
  up
• 2:32
  and
• 2:32
  handle
• 2:32
  it
• 2:32
  myself.
• 2:34
  I'm
• 2:34
  watching
• 2:34
  this
• 2:35
  happen
• 2:35
  in
• 2:35
  real
• 2:36
  time
• 2:36
  and
• 2:37
  I
• 2:37
  can't
• 2:37
  do
• 2:37
  anything
• 2:38
  about
• 2:38
  it.
• 2:39
  It's
• 2:40
  infuriating.
• 2:41
  Every
• 2:42
  time
• 2:42
  I
• 2:42
  think
• 2:42
  about
• 2:43
  them
• 2:43
  in
• 2:43
  that
• 2:43
  van,
• 2:44
  I
• 2:44
  want
• 2:44
  to
• 2:45
  scream.
• 2:47
  I
• 2:47
  lie
• 2:47
  awake
• 2:48
  thinking
• 2:48
  about
• 2:49
  how
• 2:49
  we
• 2:49
  got
• 2:49
  here.
• 2:51
  How
• 2:51
  does
• 2:51
  this
• 2:51
  happen
• 2:51
  to
• 2:52
  your
• 2:52
  own
• 2:52
  parents?
• 2:54
  Why
• 2:54
  won't
• 2:55
  they
• 2:55
  just
• 2:55
  tell
• 2:55
  me
• 2:55
  the
• 2:56
  truth
• 2:56
  so
• 2:56
  I
• 2:57
  can
• 2:57
  actually
• 2:57
  help?
• 2:59
  How
• 2:59
  do
• 2:59
  I
• 2:59
  even
• 3:00
  handle
• 3:00
  this?
• 3:01
  How
• 3:01
  do
• 3:02
  I
• 3:02
  stop
• 3:02
  feeling
• 3:03
  like
• 3:03
  I'm
• 3:03
  failing
• 3:04
  them?
• 3:05
  I
• 3:05
  really
• 3:06
  need
• 3:06
  your
• 3:06
  help,
• 3:07
  Ralph.
• 3:09
  Yeah,
• 3:09
  this
• 3:09
  is
• 3:09
  a
• 3:09
  tough
• 3:10
  one.
• 3:10
  When
• 3:10
  I
• 3:10
  heard
• 3:10
  this
• 3:10
  voicemail
• 3:11
  the
• 3:11
  first
• 3:11
  time,
• 3:12
  I
• 3:12
  don't.
• 3:12
  I
• 3:12
  don't
• 3:12
  just
• 3:12
  listen
• 3:13
  to
• 3:13
  these
• 3:13
  the
• 3:13
  first
• 3:13
  time
• 3:13
  when
• 3:14
  we
• 3:14
  go
• 3:14
  to
• 3:14
  play
• 3:14
  them
• 3:14
  on
• 3:15
  the
• 3:15
  show
• 3:15
  and
• 3:15
  I
• 3:15
  heard
• 3:15
  this
• 3:15
  one
• 3:16
  and
• 3:16
  my
• 3:16
  heart
• 3:16
  broke
• 3:17
  for
• 3:17
  this
• 3:17
  person.
• 3:18
  And
• 3:18
  when
• 3:19
  she
• 3:19
  said
• 3:19
  I
• 3:19
  wanted
• 3:19
  to
• 3:19
  scream,
• 3:20
  I
• 3:20
  wanted
• 3:20
  to
• 3:20
  send
• 3:20
  her
• 3:20
  back
• 3:21
  and
• 3:21
  say,
• 3:21
  go
• 3:21
  ahead
• 3:21
  and
• 3:21
  scream.
• 3:22
  It's
• 3:22
  probably
• 3:22
  the
• 3:22
  best
• 3:23
  thing
• 3:23
  you
• 3:23
  can
• 3:23
  do.
• 3:24
  Because
• 3:25
  I
• 3:25
  can
• 3:25
  see
• 3:25
  you
• 3:25
  care
• 3:26
  deeply
• 3:26
  about
• 3:26
  your
• 3:27
  parents,
• 3:28
  but
• 3:28
  you
• 3:28
  can
• 3:28
  care
• 3:29
  deeply
• 3:29
  about
• 3:29
  them
• 3:29
  without
• 3:30
  taking
• 3:30
  ownership
• 3:31
  of
• 3:31
  decisions
• 3:32
  they're
• 3:32
  choosing
• 3:32
  to
• 3:32
  make.
• 3:34
  I
• 3:34
  want
• 3:34
  to
• 3:34
  start
• 3:34
  off
• 3:34
  by
• 3:35
  saying
• 3:35
  this.
• 3:35
  This
• 3:35
  is
• 3:36
  probably
• 3:36
  not
• 3:36
  your
• 3:36
  problem,
• 3:37
  but
• 3:38
  let's
• 3:38
  break
• 3:38
  this
• 3:38
  down
• 3:39
  together
• 3:39
  because
• 3:39
  you
• 3:39
  sent
• 3:40
  me
• 3:40
  the
• 3:40
  question
• 3:40
  and
• 3:40
  I
• 3:40
  want
• 3:41
  to
• 3:41
  give
• 3:41
  you
• 3:41
  some
• 3:41
  honest
• 3:42
  answers.
• 3:43
  The
• 3:43
  first
• 3:44
  thing
• 3:44
  I'm
• 3:44
  going
• 3:44
  to
• 3:44
  encourage
• 3:44
  you
• 3:44
  to
• 3:45
  do,
• 3:45
  you
• 3:45
  got
• 3:46
  to
• 3:46
  accept
• 3:46
  what
• 3:46
  is
• 3:47
  and
• 3:47
  what
• 3:47
  isn't
• 3:48
  yours
• 3:48
  to
• 3:48
  control.
• 3:49
  The
• 3:50
  reason
• 3:50
  your
• 3:50
  parents
• 3:51
  are
• 3:51
  probably
• 3:51
  not
• 3:51
  telling
• 3:51
  you
• 3:52
  much
• 3:52
  is
• 3:52
  because
• 3:53
  they're
• 3:53
  embarrassed.
• 3:55
  They're
• 3:55
  the
• 3:56
  parents,
• 3:56
  you're
• 3:56
  the
• 3:56
  child.
• 3:58
  They're
• 3:58
  probably
• 3:58
  scared
• 3:59
  to
• 3:59
  death
• 3:59
  to
• 3:59
  admit
• 4:00
  what's
• 4:00
  going
• 4:00
  on.
• 4:01
  I
• 4:01
  don't
• 4:01
  know
• 4:01
  if
• 4:01
  there's
• 4:02
  an
• 4:02
  underlying
• 4:02
  drug
• 4:03
  issue
• 4:03
  or
• 4:03
  maybe
• 4:04
  there's
• 4:04
  an
• 4:04
  addiction
• 4:05
  issue,
• 4:05
  maybe
• 4:05
  there's
• 4:06
  a
• 4:06
  gambling
• 4:06
  issue.
• 4:07
  To
• 4:07
  me
• 4:07
  it
• 4:07
  sounds
• 4:08
  like
• 4:08
  there's
• 4:08
  something
• 4:08
  more
• 4:08
  going
• 4:09
  on.
• 4:10
  But
• 4:10
  big
• 4:10
  picture
• 4:11
  thing,
• 4:11
  your
• 4:12
  parents
• 4:12
  finances
• 4:13
  aren't
• 4:14
  your
• 4:14
  responsibility
• 4:15
  to
• 4:15
  manage.
• 4:17
  It's
• 4:17
  not
• 4:17
  your
• 4:18
  deal.
• 4:19
  Their
• 4:19
  decisions
• 4:20
  belong
• 4:20
  to
• 4:20
  them.
• 4:21
  Now.
• 4:22
  That
• 4:22
  doesn't
• 4:22
  mean
• 4:22
  you
• 4:22
  can't
• 4:23
  be
• 4:23
  concerned
• 4:23
  about
• 4:24
  it.
• 4:24
  I
• 4:24
  think
• 4:24
  having
• 4:25
  a
• 4:25
  level
• 4:25
  of
• 4:25
  concern
• 4:25
  is
• 4:26
  great.
• 4:26
  You
• 4:26
  love
• 4:26
  your
• 4:26
  mom
• 4:26
  and
• 4:27
  dad,
• 4:27
  I
• 4:27
  totally
• 4:27
  get
• 4:28
  it.
• 4:29
  But
• 4:29
  concern
• 4:29
  doesn't
• 4:30
  mean
• 4:30
  that
• 4:30
  you
• 4:30
  control
• 4:31
  it.
• 4:32
  Their
• 4:32
  finances,
• 4:33
  again,
• 4:33
  is
• 4:34
  not
• 4:34
  your
• 4:34
  responsibility
• 4:35
  to
• 4:35
  manage.
• 4:35
  Their
• 4:36
  decisions
• 4:36
  belong
• 4:37
  to
• 4:37
  them.
• 4:39
  So
• 4:39
  here's
• 4:39
  the
• 4:39
  first
• 4:39
  thing
• 4:39
  I'm
• 4:39
  going
• 4:39
  to
• 4:40
  tell
• 4:40
  you
• 4:40
  to
• 4:40
  do.
• 4:40
  You
• 4:40
  can
• 4:40
  offer
• 4:41
  help,
• 4:42
  I
• 4:42
  think
• 4:42
  that's
• 4:42
  a
• 4:42
  great
• 4:43
  thing
• 4:43
  to
• 4:43
  do.
• 4:44
  But
• 4:44
  don't
• 4:44
  offer
• 4:45
  a
• 4:45
  takeover.
• 4:47
  This
• 4:47
  is
• 4:47
  the
• 4:47
  key.
• 4:48
  Because
• 4:48
  I
• 4:48
  got
• 4:48
  a
• 4:49
  feeling
• 4:49
  that
• 4:49
  in
• 4:49
  your
• 4:50
  own
• 4:50
  life
• 4:51
  you're
• 4:52
  dealing
• 4:52
  with
• 4:52
  very
• 4:52
  deep
• 4:53
  wounds
• 4:53
  here.
• 4:54
  My
• 4:55
  suspicion,
• 4:56
  if
• 4:56
  I
• 4:56
  had
• 4:56
  to
• 4:56
  guess,
• 4:57
  is
• 4:57
  you
• 4:57
  probably
• 4:57
  came
• 4:58
  from
• 4:58
  a
• 4:58
  place
• 4:58
  where
• 4:58
  your
• 4:59
  parents
• 4:59
  struggled.
• 5:00
  There
• 5:01
  was
• 5:01
  probably
• 5:01
  financial
• 5:02
  issues
• 5:03
  around
• 5:03
  your
• 5:03
  house.
• 5:05
  But
• 5:05
  take
• 5:05
  a
• 5:06
  step
• 5:06
  back.
• 5:06
  How
• 5:06
  would
• 5:07
  you
• 5:07
  feel
• 5:07
  if
• 5:07
  you
• 5:08
  were
• 5:08
  in
• 5:08
  their
• 5:08
  place?
• 5:10
  They're
• 5:11
  the
• 5:11
  parents.
• 5:12
  You
• 5:12
  know,
• 5:12
  we
• 5:13
  put
• 5:13
  our
• 5:13
  parents
• 5:13
  up
• 5:13
  on
• 5:13
  this
• 5:14
  pedestal.
• 5:14
  I
• 5:14
  think
• 5:14
  about
• 5:14
  my
• 5:15
  own
• 5:15
  parents.
• 5:15
  My
• 5:15
  mother's
• 5:16
  passed
• 5:16
  away,
• 5:16
  but
• 5:16
  my
• 5:16
  dad's
• 5:17
  still
• 5:17
  around.
• 5:17
  We
• 5:18
  put
• 5:18
  our
• 5:18
  parents
• 5:18
  on
• 5:18
  this
• 5:19
  pedestal
• 5:20
  and
• 5:20
  guess
• 5:20
  what?
• 5:21
  They're
• 5:21
  human,
• 5:21
  just
• 5:21
  like
• 5:21
  us.
• 5:24
  So
• 5:24
  maybe
• 5:24
  you
• 5:24
  ask
• 5:25
  them,
• 5:25
  hey,
• 5:25
  do
• 5:25
  you
• 5:26
  want
• 5:26
  some
• 5:26
  input
• 5:26
  here?
• 5:27
  Are
• 5:28
  you
• 5:28
  willing
• 5:28
  to
• 5:28
  take
• 5:29
  some
• 5:29
  support
• 5:29
  if
• 5:29
  it's
• 5:30
  invited.
• 5:31
  But
• 5:31
  you
• 5:31
  got
• 5:31
  to
• 5:32
  come
• 5:32
  to
• 5:32
  a
• 5:32
  point
• 5:32
  where
• 5:32
  you
• 5:33
  respect
• 5:33
  that
• 5:33
  adults
• 5:34
  can
• 5:34
  reject
• 5:34
  your
• 5:34
  advice.
• 5:36
  And
• 5:36
  that's
• 5:37
  hard
• 5:37
  to
• 5:37
  hear
• 5:37
  at
• 5:37
  times.
• 5:39
  It's
• 5:39
  hard
• 5:39
  to
• 5:39
  say
• 5:40
  to
• 5:40
  another
• 5:40
  adult,
• 5:41
  hey,
• 5:41
  I
• 5:41
  want
• 5:41
  to
• 5:41
  help
• 5:41
  you.
• 5:41
  And
• 5:42
  they
• 5:42
  say,
• 5:42
  look,
• 5:42
  I
• 5:42
  don't
• 5:42
  want
• 5:42
  your
• 5:43
  help,
• 5:43
  I
• 5:43
  don't
• 5:43
  want.
• 5:43
  That's
• 5:44
  okay.
• 5:46
  But
• 5:46
  the
• 5:46
  next
• 5:46
  thing
• 5:47
  you
• 5:47
  can
• 5:47
  do
• 5:47
  practically
• 5:47
  is
• 5:48
  you
• 5:48
  can
• 5:48
  start
• 5:48
  to
• 5:48
  prepare
• 5:49
  emotionally
• 5:49
  for
• 5:49
  possible
• 5:50
  outcomes.
• 5:50
  You've
• 5:50
  already
• 5:51
  shared
• 5:51
  it.
• 5:51
  They've
• 5:52
  sold
• 5:52
  their
• 5:52
  house.
• 5:52
  They're
• 5:53
  living
• 5:53
  in
• 5:53
  a
• 5:53
  van,
• 5:54
  like
• 5:54
  you
• 5:54
  said.
• 5:55
  A
• 5:55
  van?
• 5:55
  Yeah.
• 5:55
  Guess
• 5:56
  what?
• 5:56
  There's
• 5:56
  a
• 5:56
  lot
• 5:56
  of
• 5:56
  people
• 5:56
  that
• 5:57
  are
• 5:57
  living
• 5:57
  in
• 5:57
  vans
• 5:57
  right
• 5:57
  now,
• 5:58
  in
• 5:58
  cars.
• 6:00
  But
• 6:00
  you
• 6:00
  got
• 6:00
  to
• 6:00
  accept
• 6:01
  that
• 6:01
  their
• 6:01
  choices
• 6:02
  may
• 6:03
  create
• 6:03
  future
• 6:03
  consequences
• 6:04
  that
• 6:04
  you
• 6:05
  might
• 6:05
  have
• 6:05
  to
• 6:05
  deal
• 6:05
  with.
• 6:06
  I
• 6:07
  get
• 6:07
  it.
• 6:07
  You
• 6:07
  love
• 6:07
  your
• 6:08
  parents
• 6:09
  and
• 6:09
  you
• 6:09
  can
• 6:09
  hope
• 6:09
  that
• 6:10
  all
• 6:10
  of
• 6:10
  a
• 6:10
  sudden
• 6:10
  something's
• 6:11
  going
• 6:11
  to
• 6:11
  happen
• 6:11
  and
• 6:11
  things
• 6:11
  are
• 6:12
  going
• 6:12
  to
• 6:12
  change.
• 6:12
  But
• 6:12
  guess
• 6:12
  what?
• 6:13
  That
• 6:13
  doesn't
• 6:13
  change
• 6:14
  the
• 6:14
  reality
• 6:14
  on
• 6:14
  the
• 6:15
  ground.
• 6:16
  So
• 6:16
  you've
• 6:16
  got
• 6:17
  to
• 6:17
  emotionally
• 6:17
  prepare
• 6:18
  yourself
• 6:19
  so
• 6:19
  that
• 6:19
  you
• 6:19
  don't
• 6:20
  panic
• 6:20
  later,
• 6:21
  because
• 6:21
  you
• 6:22
  might
• 6:22
  get
• 6:22
  that
• 6:22
  phone
• 6:23
  call,
• 6:23
  they
• 6:23
  might
• 6:23
  show
• 6:24
  up
• 6:24
  at
• 6:24
  that
• 6:24
  van
• 6:24
  in
• 6:24
  your
• 6:25
  driveway,
• 6:25
  and
• 6:25
  you
• 6:26
  got
• 6:26
  to
• 6:26
  decide
• 6:26
  what
• 6:26
  you're
• 6:27
  going
• 6:27
  to
• 6:27
  do.
• 6:27
  Which
• 6:28
  leads
• 6:28
  me
• 6:28
  to
• 6:28
  this.
• 6:29
  This
• 6:29
  is
• 6:29
  the
• 6:29
  big
• 6:29
  takeaway
• 6:30
  for
• 6:30
  today.
• 6:31
  You've
• 6:31
  got
• 6:32
  to
• 6:32
  set
• 6:32
  boundaries
• 6:33
  before
• 6:33
  the
• 6:33
  crisis
• 6:34
  comes.
• 6:35
  Because
• 6:36
  that
• 6:36
  crisis
• 6:36
  is
• 6:36
  coming.
• 6:37
  Like
• 6:37
  I
• 6:37
  said,
• 6:37
  it
• 6:38
  is
• 6:38
  a
• 6:38
  very
• 6:38
  distinct
• 6:39
  possibility
• 6:39
  that
• 6:40
  all
• 6:40
  of
• 6:40
  a
• 6:40
  sudden
• 6:40
  you
• 6:41
  wind
• 6:41
  up
• 6:41
  and
• 6:41
  that
• 6:41
  van
• 6:42
  is
• 6:42
  sitting
• 6:42
  in
• 6:42
  your
• 6:42
  driveway.
• 6:44
  So
• 6:44
  you've
• 6:44
  got
• 6:45
  to
• 6:45
  decide
• 6:45
  what
• 6:46
  you
• 6:46
  can
• 6:46
  offer.
• 6:46
  What
• 6:47
  are
• 6:47
  you
• 6:47
  willing
• 6:47
  to
• 6:48
  do?
• 6:49
  We
• 6:49
  also
• 6:49
  have
• 6:49
  to
• 6:49
  decide
• 6:50
  what
• 6:50
  you're
• 6:50
  not
• 6:50
  willing
• 6:50
  to
• 6:51
  do.
• 6:52
  I
• 6:52
  don't
• 6:52
  know
• 6:52
  a
• 6:52
  lot
• 6:53
  about
• 6:53
  your
• 6:53
  situation,
• 6:54
  but
• 6:54
  I
• 6:54
  don't
• 6:54
  know
• 6:55
  if
• 6:55
  you
• 6:55
  financially
• 6:55
  are
• 6:56
  in
• 6:56
  a
• 6:56
  place
• 6:56
  to
• 6:56
  support
• 6:57
  them.
• 6:57
  But
• 6:57
  you
• 6:58
  got
• 6:58
  to
• 6:58
  decide
• 6:58
  on
• 6:58
  that.
• 6:58
  Financial
• 6:59
  support,
• 7:00
  housing,
• 7:01
  caregiving,
• 7:02
  all
• 7:02
  of
• 7:03
  these
• 7:03
  things.
• 7:04
  You
• 7:04
  got
• 7:05
  to
• 7:05
  set
• 7:05
  those
• 7:05
  boundaries.
• 7:06
  Because,
• 7:06
  listen,
• 7:06
  if
• 7:07
  you
• 7:07
  set
• 7:07
  the
• 7:07
  boundaries
• 7:08
  now,
• 7:09
  before
• 7:09
  that
• 7:09
  urgency
• 7:10
  hits,
• 7:11
  it's
• 7:11
  going
• 7:11
  to
• 7:12
  be
• 7:12
  so
• 7:12
  much
• 7:12
  better.
• 7:12
  If
• 7:12
  you
• 7:13
  listen
• 7:13
  to
• 7:13
  my
• 7:13
  show,
• 7:13
  you
• 7:13
  know,
• 7:13
  I'm
• 7:14
  always
• 7:14
  about
• 7:14
  making
• 7:14
  a
• 7:15
  plan.
• 7:16
  This
• 7:16
  is
• 7:16
  the
• 7:16
  time
• 7:17
  to
• 7:17
  make
• 7:17
  a
• 7:17
  plan.
• 7:17
  And
• 7:18
  we
• 7:18
  can
• 7:18
  pray,
• 7:18
  we
• 7:19
  can
• 7:19
  hope
• 7:19
  for
• 7:19
  the
• 7:19
  best
• 7:20
  outcome.
• 7:20
  Maybe
• 7:21
  things
• 7:21
  click
• 7:21
  all
• 7:21
  of
• 7:21
  a
• 7:22
  sudden,
• 7:22
  things
• 7:22
  work
• 7:22
  out.
• 7:23
  Maybe.
• 7:23
  Maybe
• 7:23
  there's
• 7:23
  some
• 7:23
  mental
• 7:24
  illness
• 7:24
  that
• 7:24
  they
• 7:25
  need
• 7:25
  to
• 7:25
  get
• 7:25
  through.
• 7:26
  But
• 7:27
  you
• 7:27
  gotta
• 7:27
  manage
• 7:27
  your
• 7:28
  anxiety
• 7:28
  with
• 7:28
  truth.
• 7:29
  The
• 7:30
  anxiety
• 7:30
  that
• 7:31
  you're
• 7:31
  feeling
• 7:33
  is
• 7:33
  you're
• 7:34
  trying
• 7:34
  to
• 7:34
  cover
• 7:34
  something
• 7:35
  that
• 7:35
  isn't
• 7:35
  yours
• 7:35
  to
• 7:36
  carry.
• 7:37
  Yes,
• 7:38
  you
• 7:38
  can
• 7:38
  care
• 7:38
  for
• 7:38
  them.
• 7:40
  That
• 7:40
  concern
• 7:40
  is
• 7:41
  healthy,
• 7:42
  but
• 7:42
  taking
• 7:42
  over
• 7:43
  their
• 7:43
  life
• 7:43
  choices
• 7:45
  mentally
• 7:45
  isn't
• 7:46
  healthy
• 7:46
  for
• 7:46
  you.
• 7:47
  Pray
• 7:48
  about
• 7:48
  it,
• 7:48
  love
• 7:49
  them,
• 7:49
  offer
• 7:49
  them
• 7:49
  support.
• 7:50
  If
• 7:50
  they
• 7:50
  don't
• 7:50
  take
• 7:50
  it,
• 7:52
  that's
• 7:52
  just
• 7:52
  going
• 7:52
  to
• 7:52
  be
• 7:52
  one
• 7:53
  of
• 7:53
  those
• 7:53
  situations
• 7:53
  where
• 7:53
  you
• 7:53
  just
• 7:53
  got
• 7:54
  to
• 7:54
  say,
• 7:54
  look,
• 7:54
  I've
• 7:54
  done
• 7:54
  my
• 7:55
  best.
• 7:55
  Here,
• 7:55
  here's
• 7:55
  what
• 7:55
  I'm
• 7:55
  willing
• 7:56
  to
• 7:56
  do.
• 7:56
  Here's
• 7:56
  what
• 7:56
  I'm
• 7:57
  not
• 7:57
  willing
• 7:57
  to
• 7:57
  do.
• 7:59
  But
• 7:59
  I
• 7:59
  want
• 7:59
  to
• 7:59
  take
• 7:59
  this
• 7:59
  little
• 8:00
  deeper
• 8:01
  because
• 8:01
  what
• 8:01
  you
• 8:02
  may
• 8:02
  be
• 8:02
  weighing
• 8:03
  in
• 8:03
  on
• 8:03
  is
• 8:04
  fear.
• 8:05
  And
• 8:05
  I
• 8:06
  hear
• 8:06
  it
• 8:06
  in
• 8:06
  your
• 8:06
  voice.
• 8:07
  I
• 8:07
  think
• 8:07
  everybody
• 8:07
  can
• 8:08
  hear
• 8:08
  that
• 8:08
  in
• 8:08
  your
• 8:08
  voice
• 8:08
  today.
• 8:10
  Your
• 8:10
  biggest
• 8:10
  fear
• 8:10
  is
• 8:11
  what
• 8:11
  if
• 8:11
  they
• 8:11
  don't
• 8:11
  figure
• 8:11
  this
• 8:12
  out?
• 8:12
  Ralph,
• 8:13
  somehow
• 8:14
  is
• 8:14
  this
• 8:14
  going
• 8:14
  to
• 8:14
  become
• 8:15
  mine
• 8:15
  to
• 8:15
  fix?
• 8:17
  And
• 8:17
  that
• 8:17
  feeling
• 8:17
  creates
• 8:18
  constant
• 8:19
  anxiety.
• 8:19
  I
• 8:19
  get
• 8:20
  it.
• 8:20
  Constant
• 8:21
  anticipation,
• 8:22
  constant
• 8:23
  emotional
• 8:23
  pressure.
• 8:25
  But
• 8:26
  God
• 8:26
  is
• 8:26
  with
• 8:26
  you
• 8:26
  in
• 8:27
  all
• 8:27
  this
• 8:28
  and
• 8:28
  he
• 8:28
  sees
• 8:29
  you.
• 8:30
  Caring
• 8:31
  for
• 8:31
  someone
• 8:31
  doesn't
• 8:32
  mean
• 8:32
  caring.
• 8:32
  Responsibility
• 8:33
  God
• 8:34
  never
• 8:34
  assigned
• 8:35
  to
• 8:35
  you.
• 8:36
  Maybe
• 8:36
  that's
• 8:36
  the
• 8:37
  answer
• 8:37
  today.
• 8:37
  Maybe
• 8:37
  a
• 8:37
  simple
• 8:38
  prayer,
• 8:38
  lord,
• 8:38
  help
• 8:39
  me
• 8:39
  love
• 8:39
  them
• 8:39
  deeply
• 8:40
  without
• 8:40
  taking
• 8:41
  on
• 8:41
  what
• 8:41
  is
• 8:41
  not
• 8:41
  mine
• 8:42
  to
• 8:42
  carry.
• 8:44
  I
• 8:44
  know
• 8:44
  that's
• 8:45
  hard
• 8:45
  to
• 8:45
  hear.
• 8:46
  You
• 8:47
  can
• 8:47
  love
• 8:47
  your
• 8:47
  parents
• 8:47
  and
• 8:47
  not
• 8:48
  carry
• 8:48
  their
• 8:48
  burdens.
• 8:50
  You
• 8:50
  can
• 8:50
  be
• 8:50
  supportive
• 8:51
  without
• 8:51
  becoming
• 8:52
  responsible.
• 8:54
  But
• 8:54
  I
• 8:54
  want
• 8:54
  to
• 8:54
  give
• 8:55
  you
• 8:55
  a
• 8:55
  win
• 8:55
  today.
• 8:55
  I
• 8:55
  want
• 8:55
  you
• 8:56
  to
• 8:56
  do
• 8:56
  one
• 8:56
  thing
• 8:56
  for
• 8:56
  me
• 8:56
  today.
• 8:57
  I
• 8:57
  want
• 8:57
  you
• 8:57
  to
• 8:58
  write
• 8:58
  down
• 8:58
  one
• 8:58
  boundary.
• 9:00
  Finish
• 9:00
  this
• 9:00
  sentence.
• 9:01
  If
• 9:01
  my
• 9:01
  parents
• 9:02
  face
• 9:02
  a
• 9:02
  crisis,
• 9:04
  I'm
• 9:05
  willing
• 9:05
  to
• 9:05
  blank,
• 9:06
  but
• 9:06
  not
• 9:06
  blank.
• 9:07
  And
• 9:08
  it
• 9:08
  depends
• 9:08
  on
• 9:08
  your
• 9:08
  situation.
• 9:09
  Like
• 9:09
  I
• 9:09
  said,
• 9:09
  if
• 9:09
  the
• 9:09
  van
• 9:10
  rolls
• 9:10
  up
• 9:10
  in
• 9:10
  your
• 9:10
  driveway,
• 9:11
  what
• 9:11
  are
• 9:11
  you
• 9:12
  willing
• 9:12
  to
• 9:12
  do?
• 9:13
  Are
• 9:13
  you
• 9:13
  willing
• 9:13
  to
• 9:13
  take
• 9:14
  them
• 9:14
  in?
• 9:14
  Is
• 9:14
  there
• 9:14
  a
• 9:15
  timeframe?
• 9:15
  Is
• 9:16
  there
• 9:16
  a
• 9:16
  level
• 9:16
  of
• 9:16
  things
• 9:16
  they
• 9:17
  need
• 9:17
  to
• 9:17
  do?
• 9:17
  You
• 9:17
  mentioned
• 9:18
  neither
• 9:18
  of
• 9:18
  them
• 9:18
  are
• 9:18
  working.
• 9:19
  Are
• 9:20
  you
• 9:20
  going
• 9:20
  to
• 9:20
  be
• 9:20
  able
• 9:20
  to
• 9:20
  handle
• 9:21
  that?
• 9:21
  But
• 9:21
  write
• 9:21
  it
• 9:21
  down.
• 9:22
  Build
• 9:22
  that
• 9:22
  boundary
• 9:23
  ahead
• 9:23
  of
• 9:23
  time.
• 9:24
  It's
• 9:24
  going
• 9:24
  to
• 9:24
  make
• 9:24
  your
• 9:25
  life
• 9:25
  so
• 9:25
  much
• 9:25
  easier
• 9:26
  when
• 9:26
  the
• 9:26
  crisis
• 9:26
  hits.
• 9:26
  And
• 9:26
  I
• 9:27
  hate
• 9:27
  to
• 9:27
  say
• 9:27
  this,
• 9:27
  but
• 9:28
  I
• 9:28
  think
• 9:28
  the
• 9:28
  crisis
• 9:29
  is
• 9:29
  going
• 9:29
  to
• 9:29
  hit.
• 9:30
  Let's
• 9:31
  get
• 9:31
  to
• 9:31
  our
• 9:31
  Bible
• 9:31
  verse
• 9:32
  today.
• 9:32
  It
• 9:33
  comes
• 9:33
  to
• 9:33
  us
• 9:33
  from
• 9:33
  the
• 9:33
  book
• 9:33
  of
• 9:33
  Galatians,
• 9:34
  chapter
• 9:34
  6,
• 9:35
  verse
• 9:35
  5.
• 9:37
  It
• 9:37
  says,
• 9:37
  for
• 9:37
  each
• 9:38
  one
• 9:38
  should
• 9:38
  carry
• 9:39
  their
• 9:39
  own
• 9:39
  load.
• 9:41
  And
• 9:41
  that's
• 9:42
  so
• 9:42
  apropos
• 9:43
  today.
• 9:44
  It's
• 9:44
  time
• 9:45
  your
• 9:45
  parents
• 9:45
  carry
• 9:46
  their
• 9:46
  own
• 9:46
  load.
• 9:48
  Because
• 9:48
  as
• 9:49
  I've
• 9:49
  said
• 9:49
  a
• 9:49
  couple
• 9:49
  times
• 9:50
  now,
• 9:51
  loving
• 9:51
  someone,
• 9:52
  deeply
• 9:52
  loving
• 9:53
  someone
• 9:53
  doesn't
• 9:54
  mean
• 9:54
  taking
• 9:54
  responsibility
• 9:55
  for
• 9:55
  burdens.
• 9:56
  They
• 9:56
  are
• 9:56
  meant
• 9:56
  to
• 9:56
  carry
• 9:57
  themselves.
• 9:58
  Because
• 9:58
  the
• 9:59
  truth
• 9:59
  is
• 9:59
  they've
• 10:00
  got
• 10:00
  to
• 10:00
  figure
• 10:00
  this
• 10:00
  out
• 10:00
  on
• 10:01
  their
• 10:01
  own.
• 10:01
  Can
• 10:01
  you
• 10:01
  help
• 10:01
  them?
• 10:02
  Can
• 10:02
  you
• 10:02
  provide
• 10:02
  support?
• 10:03
  Maybe
• 10:03
  you've
• 10:03
  got
• 10:04
  skills
• 10:04
  that
• 10:04
  you
• 10:04
  can
• 10:04
  offer
• 10:05
  them,
• 10:05
  that's
• 10:05
  great.
• 10:06
  But
• 10:07
  if
• 10:07
  they
• 10:07
  look
• 10:07
  the
• 10:07
  other
• 10:07
  way,
• 10:08
  you
• 10:08
  got
• 10:09
  to
• 10:09
  realize
• 10:10
  you
• 10:10
  got
• 10:10
  to
• 10:10
  put
• 10:10
  it
• 10:10
  in
• 10:10
  the
• 10:10
  Lord's
• 10:11
  hands.
• 10:11
  Let's
• 10:11
  do
• 10:12
  that
• 10:12
  together
• 10:12
  right
• 10:12
  now.
• 10:12
  Let's
• 10:13
  pray
• 10:13
  together.
• 10:13
  Heavenly
• 10:14
  Father,
• 10:15
  I
• 10:15
  want
• 10:15
  to
• 10:15
  lift
• 10:15
  up
• 10:16
  the
• 10:16
  person
• 10:16
  carrying
• 10:17
  anxiety
• 10:17
  over
• 10:18
  their
• 10:18
  parents
• 10:18
  financial
• 10:19
  future.
• 10:19
  And
• 10:19
  Lord,
• 10:19
  I
• 10:20
  know
• 10:20
  it's
• 10:20
  more
• 10:20
  than
• 10:21
  just
• 10:21
  this
• 10:21
  one
• 10:21
  caller
• 10:22
  today.
• 10:22
  This
• 10:22
  is
• 10:22
  a
• 10:23
  very
• 10:23
  common
• 10:23
  situation.
• 10:25
  And
• 10:25
  you
• 10:25
  see
• 10:25
  concern,
• 10:26
  you
• 10:26
  see
• 10:26
  love,
• 10:27
  and
• 10:27
  you
• 10:28
  feel
• 10:28
  that
• 10:28
  pressure
• 10:28
  that
• 10:29
  they
• 10:29
  feel
• 10:29
  inside.
• 10:29
  Lord,
• 10:31
  and
• 10:31
  I
• 10:31
  just
• 10:31
  ask
• 10:32
  that
• 10:32
  you
• 10:32
  would
• 10:32
  give
• 10:32
  all
• 10:32
  of
• 10:33
  us
• 10:33
  peace
• 10:34
  where
• 10:34
  that
• 10:34
  fear
• 10:35
  is
• 10:35
  taking
• 10:35
  hold,
• 10:35
  that
• 10:36
  fear
• 10:36
  of
• 10:36
  not
• 10:36
  knowing
• 10:36
  what's
• 10:37
  coming
• 10:37
  next.
• 10:38
  And
• 10:38
  Lord,
• 10:39
  help
• 10:39
  us
• 10:39
  all
• 10:39
  to
• 10:39
  know
• 10:40
  what's
• 10:40
  ours
• 10:40
  to
• 10:40
  carry
• 10:41
  and
• 10:41
  what's
• 10:41
  not
• 10:41
  ours
• 10:41
  to
• 10:42
  carry.
• 10:43
  Give
• 10:43
  us
• 10:43
  wisdom
• 10:44
  on
• 10:44
  how
• 10:44
  to
• 10:44
  support
• 10:45
  and
• 10:45
  strength
• 10:46
  of
• 10:46
  how
• 10:46
  to
• 10:46
  set
• 10:47
  those
• 10:47
  healthy
• 10:47
  boundaries.
• 10:49
  And
• 10:49
  Lord,
• 10:50
  in
• 10:50
  the
• 10:50
  end,
• 10:50
  trust
• 10:50
  for
• 10:51
  you
• 10:51
  knowing
• 10:52
  what
• 10:52
  they
• 10:53
  can't
• 10:53
  control
• 10:54
  and
• 10:55
  just
• 10:55
  remind
• 10:55
  all
• 10:56
  of
• 10:56
  us
• 10:57
  that
• 10:57
  you
• 10:57
  love
• 10:57
  our
• 10:57
  parents
• 10:59
  even
• 10:59
  more
• 10:59
  than
• 11:00
  we
• 11:00
  do.
• 11:01
  And
• 11:01
  we
• 11:02
  ask
• 11:02
  this
• 11:02
  in
• 11:02
  Jesus
• 11:03
  name.
• 11:04
  Amen,
• 11:06
  friend.
• 11:06
  I
• 11:06
  just
• 11:07
  want
• 11:07
  to
• 11:07
  encourage
• 11:07
  you.
• 11:08
  You
• 11:08
  can
• 11:09
  love
• 11:09
  deeply
• 11:09
  without
• 11:10
  carrying
• 11:10
  everything.
• 11:12
  This
• 11:12
  is
• 11:12
  not
• 11:12
  all
• 11:13
  yours
• 11:13
  to
• 11:13
  carry.
• 11:14
  That's
• 11:14
  easy
• 11:15
  for
• 11:15
  me
• 11:15
  to
• 11:15
  say
• 11:15
  because
• 11:15
  I'm
• 11:16
  not
• 11:16
  going
• 11:16
  through
• 11:16
  it,
• 11:16
  but
• 11:16
  it's
• 11:17
  not
• 11:17
  all
• 11:17
  yours
• 11:17
  to
• 11:17
  carry.
• 11:19
  And
• 11:19
  maybe
• 11:19
  right
• 11:19
  now
• 11:19
  you're
• 11:20
  wrestling
• 11:20
  with
• 11:20
  something
• 11:20
  similar.
• 11:21
  Or
• 11:22
  maybe
• 11:22
  you've
• 11:22
  got
• 11:22
  a
• 11:22
  money
• 11:23
  question
• 11:24
  and
• 11:24
  you're
• 11:24
  like,
• 11:25
  I
• 11:25
  need
• 11:25
  to
• 11:25
  hear
• 11:25
  an
• 11:25
  answer
• 11:26
  to
• 11:26
  this.
• 11:26
  I
• 11:26
  want
• 11:26
  to
• 11:26
  encourage
• 11:27
  you,
• 11:27
  head
• 11:27
  over
• 11:27
  to
• 11:28
  financiallyconfidentchristian.com/question
• 11:32
  As
• 11:32
  you
• 11:32
  know,
• 11:32
  this
• 11:33
  show
• 11:33
  is
• 11:33
  all
• 11:33
  about
• 11:33
  answering
• 11:34
  your
• 11:34
  questions
• 11:34
  and
• 11:35
  helping
• 11:35
  you
• 11:35
  break
• 11:35
  that
• 11:36
  cycle
• 11:36
  of
• 11:36
  financial
• 11:37
  shame.
• 11:37
  So
• 11:37
  if
• 11:38
  you're
• 11:38
  dealing
• 11:38
  with
• 11:38
  something,
• 11:39
  maybe
• 11:39
  it's
• 11:39
  a
• 11:39
  joy,
• 11:40
  maybe
• 11:40
  it's
• 11:40
  a
• 11:40
  sadness,
• 11:41
  maybe
• 11:41
  it's
• 11:41
  something
• 11:41
  you
• 11:42
  just
• 11:42
  want
• 11:42
  to
• 11:42
  talk
• 11:42
  through.
• 11:43
  Head
• 11:43
  over
• 11:43
  to
• 11:44
  financiallyconfidentchristian.com/question
• 11:47
  and
• 11:47
  tell
• 11:47
  me
• 11:47
  what's
• 11:47
  going
• 11:48
  on
• 11:48
  in
• 11:48
  your
• 11:48
  life
• 11:48
  and
• 11:49
  I'll
• 11:49
  put
• 11:49
  it
• 11:49
  on
• 11:49
  the
• 11:49
  show.
• 11:50
  Well,
• 11:51
  thank
• 11:51
  you
• 11:51
  so
• 11:51
  much
• 11:51
  for
• 11:51
  joining
• 11:52
  me
• 11:52
  today.
• 11:52
  A
• 11:52
  tough
• 11:53
  one
• 11:53
  today.
• 11:54
  I
• 11:54
  think
• 11:54
  we
• 11:54
  all
• 11:55
  can
• 11:55
  feel
• 11:55
  the
• 11:55
  emotion
• 11:56
  of
• 11:56
  what
• 11:56
  this
• 11:56
  young
• 11:56
  lady's
• 11:57
  going
• 11:57
  through.
• 11:58
  But
• 11:58
  I
• 11:58
  want
• 11:58
  to
• 11:58
  encourage
• 11:59
  you.
• 11:59
  We've
• 11:59
  got
• 11:59
  a
• 11:59
  loving
• 11:59
  God
• 12:00
  that
• 12:00
  is
• 12:00
  there
• 12:00
  to
• 12:00
  help
• 12:01
  us
• 12:01
  in
• 12:01
  all
• 12:01
  of
• 12:01
  these
• 12:02
  things.
• 12:02
  So
• 12:02
  stay
• 12:03
  financially
• 12:03
  savvy
• 12:04
  out
• 12:04
  there.
• 12:04
  May
• 12:04
  God
• 12:05
  bless
• 12:05
  you
• 12:05
  and
• 12:06
  you
• 12:06
  have
• 12:06
  a
• 12:06
  great
• 12:07
  day.
• 12:22
  Sam.