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you are enough. · feel your feelings with Ethan Jewell

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  You are enough. Yes, you.
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  You are enough right now as you are.
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  And I know this phrase is often thrown around.
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  It's kind of in that same category as other useless mental
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  health phrases like oh, just smile, be positive.
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  You are enough. But this one has a little bit of
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  truth to it. I don't mean it just as some
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  soulless kind of empty encouragement that won't
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  actually do anything. I mean that you are enough as
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  you are, regardless of the feelings that you struggle with,
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  regardless of the mental health issues that you have, you're
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  enough as you are. This kind of shameless self
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  acceptance is so important in our mental health journeys.
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  So I want to talk about it today.
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  My name is Ethan Jewell and welcome back to Feel Your
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  Feelings. I remember when I was in my
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  deepest, darkest struggle with my mental health, I would hear
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  these little phrases like you are enough, and I would roll my
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  eyes. I would go, What are you talking
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  about? Of course I'm not enough.
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  Look at this struggle. Look at this.
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  I couldn't get out of bed this morning and I cried five times
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  yesterday. Of course I'm not enough.
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  I'm not getting enough done. But that's the problem.
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  I wasn't just accepting myself how I was.
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  I was thinking that I needed to prove my existence.
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  I literally needed to prove to both the world and to myself
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  that I was allowed to just exist.
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  And that is a dangerous trap. So if you have struggled with
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  with this, you're in the right place.
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  Thank you so much for joining me to feel your feelings.
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  So 1st I want to talk about a common lie that we tell
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  ourselves whenever we're struggling with this lack of
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  self acceptance. Whenever we're struggling with
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  the feeling of not being enough. And the lie is I'll be enough.
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  When that when is so dangerous because it tells you that right
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  now there's something wrong with you.
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  There's something that needs to be fixed in order for you to
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  exist as a person, and that's just not true.
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  You know, we say I'll be enough when I get this promotion.
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  Or maybe just on a more basic level, I'll be enough when I get
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  happy. I'll be enough when I stop
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  struggling. And the truth is, the struggle
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  may always be there. You know, I don't think there's
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  going to be a world where I don't struggle with bouts of
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  depression. But I know that that doesn't
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  change my worth as a person. I can be depressed and still be
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  worthy. I can be depressed and still be
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  enough. I can have bad days and still
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  love myself and that is such an important thing to remember.
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  It's never all be enough when it's I am enough.
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  And I will also push myself to achieve these things because I I
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  accept myself and I love myself enough to try to get better.
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  Don't improve out of guilt. Don't try to improve out of some
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  invisible, you know, set of requirements to be enough.
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  You are enough. You just have to believe it.
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  We are all enough. You have to change your mindset.
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  Worth is not conditional. There's no conditions.
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  There's no terms and conditions that you need to read through
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  and agree to in order to be enough in order to accept
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  yourself. See, the reality is there is no
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  conditions your, your struggles. They don't define your worth.
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  You know, when you struggle with your mental health, you don't
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  become less valuable. You know, a lot of people think,
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  oh, I'm broken. You know, they think of it
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  almost like an object. Oh, I'm, I'm broken.
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  You know, I broke this object. Now it's worth less.
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  That's just not the case. We are deep and complicated
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  emotional creatures that are supposed to sometimes feel bad.
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  You know a good day will just be a day if you only experience
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  happiness, and a helping hand will just be a hand if you only
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  experience happiness. So without these struggles, you
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  are not a full person. In order to be a person, you
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  have to struggle sometimes and it sucks.
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  I wish I could say that we could just all be happy all the time,
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  but we have to struggle, and those struggles do not define
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  your worth. A cloudy sky does not mean that
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  the sun is gone. When you look up at the sky and
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  you see clouds, you don't think, Oh my God, the sun exploded and
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  there's never going to be daylight ever again.
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  No, you think, oh, there's a cloud covering the sun, it'll
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  pass. So why don't you think of your
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  mental health the same way? You know when you're struggling,
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  when you have a cloud over your head, when you have a a hard
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  cloudy day? Why don't you think, oh, I'm
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  having a difficult day? This too will pass.
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  And it doesn't define you. It doesn't define you as being
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  stuck in darkness forever. It doesn't define you as not
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  being enough. It just is a difficult moment.
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  That's something we have to accept in our mental health
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  journey. You're not.
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  And we, we are enough. Our struggles do not define us.
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  You are worth more than just your mental health struggles.
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  So in order to reach this level of knowing that we're enough, in
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  order to reach the self acceptance, we have to embrace
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  all parts of ourselves. And that means, you know,
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  welcoming all emotions, not just the pleasant ones.
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  And I've preached this for forever.
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  The name of this podcast is literally feel your feelings
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  because I wanted people to be encouraged to feel all of their
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  feelings. You know, it's, it's just an
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  all-encompassing feelings because you have to feel the
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  good. Yes, you have to feel happy, you
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  have to feel joy, you have to feel excitement, but you have to
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  feel the bad. And I will continue to preach
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  that all the time to anyone who will listen.
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  So it is it is so important to practice self acceptance and a
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  great way to do this is through self compassion.
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  So when you're struggling, instead of talking down on
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  yourself, instead of saying I'm not enough, I shouldn't be
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  feeling this. Instead, practice the same
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  compassion that you would practice with a friend who's
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  struggling. If you if you have a friend
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  who's dealing with a bout of depression and they can't get
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  out of bed, you wouldn't tell them what's wrong with you.
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  You know you're not worth anything.
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  You're worthless. Just get out of bed, you idiot.
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  You wouldn't say that to them. So why do you say the same thing
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  to yourself? Why is your story so much more
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  destructive than the story that you tell other people?
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  It's because you don't have that self acceptance.
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  It's because you don't believe that you're enough when you
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  always have been. So how can you extend that same
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  kindness to yourself? That's what we have to figure
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  out. And there's really no blanket
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  way to do that. You know, I can tell you to be
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  compassionate to yourself, but that won't happen unless you
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  practice it in person. So just try to be aware of that
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  and try to remember in those moments that you're maybe
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  talking to a friend. So there's some simple,
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  actionable ways to start embracing being enough.
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  Challenge that negative self talk.
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  You know, when you think I'm not enough, ask who told me that?
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  Why am I telling myself this story?
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  Why is this my narrative right now?
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  Challenge it. Challenge that directly.
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  Celebrate those small wins. You know, when you get out of
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  bed, when you reach out to a friend, when you take care of
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  yourself, these are wins. They're small wins, yes, but
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  they're wins and they're practice.
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  They're they're, they're practicing towards bigger wins
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  and they're practice towards believing that you're enough.
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  When you care for yourself, when you practice self-care, you are
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  showing yourself that you're enough and that you love
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  yourself. When you're kind to yourself,
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  you're showing yourself that you're enough.
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  You're showing yourself that you care.
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  And that is so important when we're growing with our mental
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  health, when we're trying to find our way out of a mental
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  health struggle, that is so important.
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  So treat yourself with that same patience that you would offer a
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  friend. Treat yourself with that same
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  love you would offer a friend. Because you are enough.
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  No matter where you are, no matter what you feel, no matter
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  how much you struggle, you are enough.
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  I remember there was a time when that was all I wanted to hear,
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  that I was enough. I remember sitting in bed
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  thinking, man, there's something really wrong with me.
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  You know, I'm not perfect. I need to be better.
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  Healing is not perfection. It's about showing up for
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  yourself. It took me years to realize I
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  was supposed to show up for myself.
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  And when I did, when I started being consistent, when I started
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  accepting that I was enough, when I started showing myself
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  self acceptance, self compassion, everything changed.
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  And you deserve that same acceptance.
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  You deserve that same compassion.
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  You deserve to know that you are enough.
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  This is a little odd, but I would like to end this episode
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  with a poem. It's one of my favorite poems
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  goes like this. I like it when it gets
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  difficult. I like it when my heart becomes
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  so heavy that I need help help carrying it.
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  I like it when I'm human, when I'm weak, when I blister because
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  a callus means you've been touched by 1000 lives.
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  A shell means you're capable of surviving.
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  A cold exterior means there's something warm to protect.
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  I hold so much love inside. I like it when I'm tender, when
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  I'm soft and sweet. I like it when waves crash.
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  It reminds me although this life made may hold much pain, I am
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  capable of caring and I'm more than enough.
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  And you are more than enough. Thank you so much for being
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  here. I'm trying kind of a new format.
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  I really appreciate y'all being here for joining me for feeling
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  your feelings with me. As always, you can shoot me Adm
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  on my Instagram at Jewel boy with an I under score.
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  Let me know what you thought about today's episode.
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  Also, if you need help feeling your feelings, you should check
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  out my music on all platforms under the name of Ethan Jewel.
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  I almost guarantee it'll make you cry.
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  Also, that poem was from my poetry book, which is available
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  on my website ethanjewel.com. Thank you so much for being
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  here. Thank you for understanding that
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  you are enough. And as always, thank you for
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  feeling your feelings. I'll see you next time.