Latest / Sex Advice for Seniors Podcast / What Most People Get Wrong About Sex and Ageing

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What Most People Get Wrong About Sex and Ageing · Sex Advice for Seniors Podcast

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  SPEAKER_01: For anyone embracing pleasure and wellness at every stage of life,
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  SPEAKER_01: Oh My Bod delivers smart,
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  SPEAKER_01: sophisticated intimacy products that empower you to feel good.
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  SPEAKER_01: Explore more at ohmybod.com, spelled O-H-M-I-B-O-D.
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  SPEAKER_01: Hi, this is Suzanne and you are listening to Sex Advice for Seniors,
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  SPEAKER_01: the podcast where we have honest,
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  SPEAKER_01: empowering conversations about sex, intimacy and relationships in later life.
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  SPEAKER_01: And today I'm very excited.
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  SPEAKER_01: Thank you for joining us.
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  SPEAKER_01: Which has got over 500 episodes, so loads to dig in there.
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  SPEAKER_01: He is one of the most respected voices in the field of sexuality research.
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  SPEAKER_01: And today we're going to be diving into men's sexual health,
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  SPEAKER_01: which many of you will know is a Hi, Suzanne.
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  SPEAKER_01: I'm happy to be here.
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  SPEAKER_01: And I want to just start by asking,
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  SPEAKER_01: how does men's sexual function typically change as they age?
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  SPEAKER_01: And what are some of the common concerns that you hear?
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  SPEAKER_00: So when you say, how does it typically change with age?
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  SPEAKER_00: My answer to that is that there isn't just one pattern.
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  SPEAKER_00: You know, everybody's sexual journey and their body changes in different ways over time.
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  SPEAKER_00: And so there's not just one path.
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  SPEAKER_00: And, you know, for some people, I think, you know, it's important to highlight when we're
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  SPEAKER_00: We're talking about sex and aging.
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  SPEAKER_00: A lot of people think about, well,
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  SPEAKER_00: as you get older,
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  SPEAKER_00: your sexual function necessarily deteriorates, sex gets worse, all of these things.
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  SPEAKER_00: It's all doom and gloom.
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  SPEAKER_00: But the reality is that for seniors,
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  SPEAKER_00: many of them have very active, satisfying, fulfilling sex lives.
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  SPEAKER_00: So in terms of some of the most common concerns that come up as men age,
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  SPEAKER_00: erectile difficulties obviously would be one of the biggest ones on the list.
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  SPEAKER_00: Big increase in men reporting erectile problems.
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  SPEAKER_00: And as they get older, that increases further.
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  SPEAKER_00: But there are lots of things that you can do to address erectile difficulties,
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  SPEAKER_00: and we'll get into that a little bit later.
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  SPEAKER_00: Another issue that sometimes affects men as they get older So desire
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  SPEAKER_00: and arousal difficulties tend to be kind of the two biggest things
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  SPEAKER_00: that I see coming up for men as they age.
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  SPEAKER_01: But as you say, it's not everyone.
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  SPEAKER_01: And it does seem to vary quite significantly from one man to another.
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  SPEAKER_01: Sometimes when I think about sex and aging,
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  SPEAKER_01: I think we don't really have any role models, especially women.
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  SPEAKER_01: We don't really have many people,
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  SPEAKER_01: older people, actually, that are role models talking about this.
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  SPEAKER_01: Even when I look at celebrities and And that I might think like a George Clooney,
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  SPEAKER_01: for example, right?
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  SPEAKER_01: Or somebody like that.
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  SPEAKER_01: He never talks about his sex life.
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  SPEAKER_01: None of these older guys will ever talk about their sex life.
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  SPEAKER_01: So I suspect that for a lot of men,
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  SPEAKER_01: when things do go on in their body,
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  SPEAKER_01: like unreliable erections or loss of libido,
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  SPEAKER_01: there's a sense of shame about it because nobody's talking about it.
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  SPEAKER_00: Absolutely.
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  SPEAKER_00: It's so true.
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  SPEAKER_00: I mean, men in general tend to be very reluctant to seek care for health problems, right?
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  SPEAKER_00: And that includes sexual health problems, which have an even greater level of shame and stigma.
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  SPEAKER_00: Now, things have changed somewhat in recent years with the advent of Viagra and all
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  SPEAKER_00: of these other erectile dysfunction medications
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  SPEAKER_00: that are increasingly available regularly.
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  SPEAKER_00: Thank you so much for joining us today.
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  SPEAKER_00: But the issue is that pills don't fix everything, right?
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  SPEAKER_00: So taking a drug like Viagra doesn't give you an automatic or instantaneous erection.
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  SPEAKER_00: And so if there are other health or relationship or communication issues
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  SPEAKER_00: that are going on, a pill isn't necessarily going to fix that.
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  SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
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  SPEAKER_01: The blue pill is not necessarily the answer that's going to solve their problem.
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  SPEAKER_01: And often down the line,
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  SPEAKER_01: they may have even worse problems because they weren't looking at
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  SPEAKER_01: the underlying cause and therefore they're not actually fixing the problem.
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  SPEAKER_01: They're just masking it.
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  SPEAKER_01: And it's something I spoke with a guy from John Hopkins a few weeks ago
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  SPEAKER_01: who was actually instrumental in developing Viagra.
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  SPEAKER_01: And I said to him, did you anticipate a time when you were working on this drug?
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  SPEAKER_01: Where guys wouldn't even have to speak to a doctor to get it.
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  SPEAKER_01: Because in the UK, we can walk up the road to the pharmacy and we can just get it.
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  SPEAKER_01: I think guys just fill in a form, right?
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  SPEAKER_01: So I think it's quite dangerous to be able to get a pill like Viagra so easily
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  SPEAKER_01: when there potentially could be some quite significant underlying cause that's not
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  SPEAKER_01: being addressed properly.
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  SPEAKER_00: Yeah, and I agree with you in the sense that it's often used as a band-aid solution
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  SPEAKER_00: because it's easier to pop a pill than it is to do the harder work
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  SPEAKER_00: to address underlying issues like shame or communication difficulties.
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  SPEAKER_00: And, you know, taking a pill, as we've said, isn't going to address those other issues.
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  SPEAKER_00: And so it might create a temporary solution,
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  SPEAKER_00: but it's not going to necessarily fix the deeper issues in the long run.
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  SPEAKER_01: I know that we said we were going to talk about men's sex toys,
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  SPEAKER_01: and I'm keen to do them because I know that's one of your specialities.
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  SPEAKER_01: And I think that there's a lot of men,
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  SPEAKER_01: in fact,
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  SPEAKER_01: I got an email the other day from somebody who said,
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  SPEAKER_01: I'm struggling with unreliable erections.
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  SPEAKER_01: I don't really,
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  SPEAKER_01: you know,
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  SPEAKER_01: I can't really orgasm because I,
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  SPEAKER_01: you know, I can't get fully erect, blah, blah, blah.
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  SPEAKER_01: And You know, what can I do?
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  SPEAKER_01: And I said, you know, there are toys out there.
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  SPEAKER_01: So can we talk about toys?
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  SPEAKER_01: Because men, when I talk about men's sex toys, they look at me like I've got a hand.
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  SPEAKER_01: What do I need that for?
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  SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
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  SPEAKER_00: And I mean,
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  SPEAKER_00: that's a thing that like for a lot of guys,
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  SPEAKER_00: when they start masturbating,
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  SPEAKER_00: often as a teenager,
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  SPEAKER_00: they will continue to masturbate in the same way for the rest of their lives.
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  SPEAKER_00: And it's just sort of like you seem to learn one way of doing it.
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  SPEAKER_00: And so I think it's important for people regardless of gender
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  SPEAKER_00: to mix up their self-pleasure routine and explore different types and forms
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  SPEAKER_00: of stimulation because you might unlock new pleasure sources
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  SPEAKER_00: that you didn't even know existed.
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  SPEAKER_00: And that's one of the cool things about sex toys is
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  SPEAKER_00: that they can introduce these Novel sensations that you can't replicate
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  SPEAKER_00: by just using your hand.
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  SPEAKER_01: And do you have an example?
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  SPEAKER_01: I don't know if you've got like boxes next to you or something.
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  SPEAKER_01: I mean, in particular, you think is kind of really cool.
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  SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
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  SPEAKER_00: I mean, if you open any drawer in my house,
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  SPEAKER_00: you're going to find sex toys in it because I do a lot of work
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  SPEAKER_00: with sex toy companies and lube companies.
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  SPEAKER_00: And so my house is overflowing with sexual wellness products.
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  SPEAKER_00: But there are several that I can suggest or recommend that It might be worth checking out.
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  SPEAKER_00: And so something that I like particularly as a toy is called the ArcWave Ion,
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  SPEAKER_00: and it's a vibratory stroker toy.
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  SPEAKER_00: So you can use it kind of as a traditional masturbation stroker device,
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  SPEAKER_00: but it also has this vibratory sensation to it.
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  SPEAKER_00: It includes or incorporates what's called this pleasure air technology,
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  SPEAKER_00: where it's these little bursts of air that provide this vibratory sensation
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  SPEAKER_00: or stimulation.
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  SPEAKER_00: And what's I think important for men to think about when it comes
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  SPEAKER_00: to exploring sex toys is that there's actually research showing
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  SPEAKER_00: that vibratory sensations to the penis can actually help stimulate nerve regrowth
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  SPEAKER_00: and regeneration.
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  SPEAKER_00: And so as men are aging and they might be experiencing more erectile difficulties,
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  SPEAKER_00: using a vibratory toy might actually help in terms of maintaining penile health.
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  SPEAKER_00: So the arc wave ion is a toy I've actually used before.
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  SPEAKER_00: And I used to think like vibration didn't do anything for me.
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  SPEAKER_00: And it wasn't until I met this toy that I was like, oh, like there is something to this.
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  SPEAKER_00: Like I understand it.
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  SPEAKER_00: And like I said,
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  SPEAKER_00: you can use it as a stroker,
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  SPEAKER_00: but you can also just kind of There's a little bit of a learning curve to it,
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  SPEAKER_00: but it is something that
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  SPEAKER_00: I think I've got an arc wave without the vibration,
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  SPEAKER_00: which is, if I'm right, it's like a solid, it's like a tube.
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  SPEAKER_00: Inside the tube, there's like a sleeve.
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  SPEAKER_00: The sleeve creates a vacuum.
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  SPEAKER_00: Mm-hmm.
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  SPEAKER_01: And then it's a stroker.
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  SPEAKER_01: And so what you're describing is that with the addition of vibration.
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  SPEAKER_01: Is that right?
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  SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
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  SPEAKER_00: And so it's, like I said, it's this pleasure air technology.
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  SPEAKER_00: So it's these little bursts of air.
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  SPEAKER_00: And so it provides this vibratory-like sensation.
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  SPEAKER_00: So it's a little bit different than a traditional vibrator, but it operates much the same.
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  SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
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  SPEAKER_01: So Womanizer make an air pleasure technology that's like a fluttering sensation.
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  SPEAKER_01: Which is again,
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  SPEAKER_01: it's a very different kind of sensation than a straight like vibration
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  SPEAKER_01: a consistent pitch.
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  SPEAKER_01: I always describe these things as being at certain pitches and I find
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  SPEAKER_01: that pitch is quite rumbly and kind of low.
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  SPEAKER_01: And then other vibrators are kind of pitch quite high and quite intense.
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  SPEAKER_01: And yeah,
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  SPEAKER_01: so I'll have to ask for that one because I think I've only used the one on someone
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  SPEAKER_01: that was the one.
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  SPEAKER_01: That didn't have the vibration.
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  SPEAKER_01: So that sounds interesting.
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  SPEAKER_01: And the other one that I don't know if you've tried that is one
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  SPEAKER_01: that I was given was one that just sits on the head and vibrates called
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  SPEAKER_01: the Blow Motion.
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  SPEAKER_01: And I wonder with those toys,
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  SPEAKER_01: if they're better for men who really struggle with erectile dysfunction
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  SPEAKER_01: because they don't actually enclose the whole penis.
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  SPEAKER_01: They just sit at the top.
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  SPEAKER_00: Yeah, so here's the thing that I think is important to keep in mind when it comes
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  SPEAKER_00: to sex toys is that there is no one universal toy that's going to be best
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  SPEAKER_00: for any man or any woman because everybody's genitals are a little bit different.
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  SPEAKER_00: And we often think of penises as kind of being interchangeable and that
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  SPEAKER_00: the same parts of the penis are going to be the most sensitive on every guy,
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  SPEAKER_00: but that's not the case.
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  SPEAKER_00: And for people who might be more sensitive around the head or the glands of
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  SPEAKER_00: the penis,
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  SPEAKER_00: a toy that focuses sensation more on that area might be more desirable to them.
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  SPEAKER_00: But for other people Having that greater stimulation of the shaft or the frenulum
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  SPEAKER_00: or other parts of the penis might be something that works better for them.
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  SPEAKER_00: So I think there's kind of, when it comes to sex toys...
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  SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
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  SPEAKER_00: And you know there's lots of things that we can consider here you know.
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  SPEAKER_00: A toy like the Arcway Bayon is something that you can use by yourself.
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  SPEAKER_00: You can also potentially use it with a partner in the form of mutual masturbation.
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  SPEAKER_00: But you can also consider vibratory toys that you can use together during partnered sex.
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  SPEAKER_00: So something like the WeVibe Pivot is a toy that you can wear
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  SPEAKER_00: that provides sensation to the penis and also the clitoris at the same time.
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  SPEAKER_00: So it's a couple's sex toy that can give you,
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  SPEAKER_00: as the man, it can give you that vibratory sensation.
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  SPEAKER_00: That can also help in terms of supporting arousal and maintaining an erection.
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  SPEAKER_01: I know I've spoken to lots of people that have never used toys,
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  SPEAKER_01: and sometimes they can find it quite challenging to know, A,
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  SPEAKER_01: what to buy,
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  SPEAKER_01: because as you just acknowledged,
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  SPEAKER_01: some of these toys do take a little while to figure out.
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  SPEAKER_01: I struggle sometimes with too many buttons, too many patterns, too much.
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  SPEAKER_01: I just get a little bit overwhelmed, frankly.
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  SPEAKER_01: I'm a very simple, straightforward, high-vibration kind of woman.
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  SPEAKER_01: That's all I really want.
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  SPEAKER_01: Anytime I accidentally move to something else, I just end up feeling slightly disappointed.
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  SPEAKER_01: How would you introduce toys into a relationship if you've never had one before?
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  SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
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  SPEAKER_00: And when it comes to introducing toys into a relationship,
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  SPEAKER_00: in terms of heterosexual relationships,
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  SPEAKER_00: women are often the ones who are introducing it more often than men,
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  SPEAKER_00: because a lot of guys feel this sense of insecurity or shame around sex toys
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  SPEAKER_00: that like,
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  SPEAKER_00: you know,
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  SPEAKER_00: if I have to bring a sex toy into the relationship,
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  SPEAKER_00: that means that I'm not able to pleasure my partner enough.
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  SPEAKER_00: And if their partner mentions wanting to incorporate sex toys,
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  SPEAKER_00: a lot of guys take that very personally and think, well,
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  SPEAKER_00: there must be a problem with me or my penis and,
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  SPEAKER_00: you So we kind of need to first start by dropping that shame around this whole topic
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  SPEAKER_00: of sex toys because that really gets in the way of having productive conversations
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  SPEAKER_00: about it.
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  SPEAKER_00: But I think a helpful way to introduce toys into a relationship is to Start first
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  SPEAKER_00: by validating your partner, right?
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  SPEAKER_00: So making it clear that you enjoy having sex with them, you're attracted to them.
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  SPEAKER_00: And then propose using the toy as here's this new thing that we can try together.
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  SPEAKER_00: And here's why I think that we might both get some enjoyment out of it.
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  SPEAKER_00: And frame it as an invitation to try something new as opposed to, oh,
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  SPEAKER_00: there's this problem in our sex life and we need to fix it or there's, you know...
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  SPEAKER_00: When you're coming from a deficit lens, that just makes the conversation a lot harder.
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  SPEAKER_00: So framing it as this invitation,
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  SPEAKER_00: making it clear that everybody can get something out of it is often
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  SPEAKER_00: a very helpful path to introducing new things,
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  SPEAKER_00: whether it's toys or something else into the relationships.
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  SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
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  SPEAKER_01: And as you say,
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  SPEAKER_01: sometimes these couples toys are a really good way to make sure
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  SPEAKER_01: that everyone's getting something out of it.
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  SPEAKER_01: So there's mutual pleasure going on.
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  SPEAKER_01: And I know, you know, there's quite a lot of rings.
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  SPEAKER_01: I got sent something.
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  SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
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  SPEAKER_01: The person I was with was going to squeeze it, right?
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  SPEAKER_01: It was a constant surprise.
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  SPEAKER_01: So I think there's ways to make this playful as well without it being,
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  SPEAKER_01: as you say, a source of shame or some sort of deficiency in one or the other person.
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  SPEAKER_01: And things like what we haven't talked about are things like pumps.
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  SPEAKER_01: Now, when I talk to people about pumps, generally, that's when they totally switch off on me.
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  SPEAKER_00: Yeah, and I get it.
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  SPEAKER_00: And it's because penis pumps have become kind of this punchline in movies and popular media.
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  SPEAKER_00: You know,
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  SPEAKER_00: I always,
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  SPEAKER_00: when I think about penis pumps, I think about the Austin Powers movies, right?
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  SPEAKER_00: And I think that's where a lot of people go.
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  SPEAKER_00: And it's something that we've tended to associate with small penis size and a source
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  SPEAKER_00: of embarrassment.
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  SPEAKER_00: And And there's a lot of clinical and scientific evidence showing that they work.
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  SPEAKER_00: And you know, prior to the advent
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  SPEAKER_00: In Viagra,
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  SPEAKER_00: penis pumps were actually the most prescribed option for men who were dealing
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  SPEAKER_00: with erectile dysfunction.
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  SPEAKER_00: And so they work.
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  SPEAKER_00: We have decades of evidence that they do.
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  SPEAKER_00: And there shouldn't be anything shameful about using a pump.
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  SPEAKER_00: And there are actually some advantages of using them.
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  SPEAKER_00: And so if you're looking for an on-demand solution,
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  SPEAKER_00: a penis pump might actually be very much worth considering.
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  SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
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  SPEAKER_00: For men who undergo prostate surgeries,
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  SPEAKER_00: doctors often prescribe and recommend using a penis pump before and after
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  SPEAKER_00: the surgery because it actually helps men to maintain and preserve their size
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  SPEAKER_00: over time.
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  SPEAKER_00: And so if you're concerned about something like penis size and penile health,
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  SPEAKER_00: using a penis pump might actually be part of a healthy routine for making sure
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  SPEAKER_00: that your penis is in top shape as you age.
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  SPEAKER_01: Yeah, there are female versions of this that we see sometimes in porn,
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  SPEAKER_01: for example,
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  SPEAKER_01: where women are pumping up their clitoris or their vulva to get this enlarged,
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  SPEAKER_01: engorged look, which, you know, some men find a turn on, right?
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  SPEAKER_01: And I personally think,
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  SPEAKER_01: and I know that people think that it's a bit odd,
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  SPEAKER_01: but I think that there is a visual thing to pumping, right?
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  SPEAKER_01: I mean, when you pump it up, it looks big.
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  SPEAKER_01: And if you like a girthy penis, then frankly, using a pump is going to get you that.
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  SPEAKER_01: Now, it's not going to add six inches to your dick.
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  SPEAKER_00: No.
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  SPEAKER_00: No, the way I like to think about penis pumps is that they help you
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  SPEAKER_00: to maximize your size so they can help you to show up at your largest.
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  SPEAKER_00: And that's one of the things that a lot of guys find very appealing
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  SPEAKER_00: about using them is that they can give you that greater confidence because
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  SPEAKER_00: as you age,
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  SPEAKER_00: you might still be able to get erections,
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  SPEAKER_00: but sometimes they're not as full as they used to be.
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  SPEAKER_00: So having a pump can help you to feel like you're getting the erections
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  SPEAKER_00: that you used to when you were in your 20s and 30s and so forth.
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  SPEAKER_01: Yeah,
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  SPEAKER_01: all of this stuff comes back to what you said before about how you introduce toys
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  SPEAKER_01: without saying that it's about shame or some sort of deficit.
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  SPEAKER_01: It's all about like, how can we reframe some of this so that people don't feel embarrassed?
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  SPEAKER_01: Because pumps are good for penile health.
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  SPEAKER_01: We know that.
• 21:15
  SPEAKER_01: It does all sorts of good things.
• 21:17
  SPEAKER_01: Once we stop feeling like we're inadequate and that actually it's just like exercising, right?
• 21:24
  SPEAKER_01: Which is pretty much what it is.
• 21:26
  SPEAKER_01: It's just exercising.
• 21:28
  SPEAKER_01: You know,
• 21:28
  SPEAKER_01: I spoke to somebody yesterday about pelvic floor and about incontinence and about
• 21:34
  SPEAKER_01: the need for women to use devices or learn how to exercise their kegel muscles.
• 21:41
  SPEAKER_01: It's all part of the same thing,
• 21:43
  SPEAKER_01: which is just keeping that area down there healthy,
• 21:47
  SPEAKER_01: keeping it active and being able to maintain good health.
• 21:53
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
• 21:53
  SPEAKER_00: And, you know,
• 21:54
  SPEAKER_00: when it comes to penis pumps,
• 21:56
  SPEAKER_00: one caveat with them is that you don't want to over pump, right?
• 21:58
  SPEAKER_00: So you want to always make sure that with whatever sex toys you're using,
• 22:02
  SPEAKER_00: that you're following the manufacturer's instructions,
• 22:05
  SPEAKER_00: because there can be risks of overdoing it when it Yeah.
• 22:24
  SPEAKER_00: Self-pleasure and having partnered sex,
• 22:27
  SPEAKER_00: people who are more active as they age sexually,
• 22:30
  SPEAKER_00: intimately,
• 22:31
  SPEAKER_00: tend to have better sexual function and that's in part
• 22:34
  SPEAKER_00: because regular sexual activity promotes that regular oxygenated blood flow.
• 22:39
  SPEAKER_00: And so it is sort of like exercising and working out.
• 22:46
  SPEAKER_00: And, you know,
• 22:47
  SPEAKER_00: I've also done some research recently on menopause and women and aging,
• 22:51
  SPEAKER_00: looking at the role of masturbation.
• 22:54
  SPEAKER_00: In terms of how that affects women's sexual health and function.
• 22:58
  SPEAKER_00: And what we find is that masturbation is actually very beneficial in terms
• 23:02
  SPEAKER_00: of reducing a lot of menopause symptoms that women have as they age.
• 23:07
  SPEAKER_00: And in part,
• 23:07
  SPEAKER_00: it's because, again,
• 23:08
  SPEAKER_00: you're just getting that regular oxygenated blood flow to the genital tissue helps
• 23:12
  SPEAKER_00: to maintain and preserve it.
• 23:14
  SPEAKER_00: And that has all kinds of positive effects in terms of sexual pleasure and sensation
• 23:19
  SPEAKER_00: and orgasmic capacity and so forth.
• 23:22
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah, totally.
• 23:23
  SPEAKER_01: So I'm assuming that you were part of the team then at Kinsey with Love Honey doing
• 23:27
  SPEAKER_01: the research that I just did Substack Live last week with a woman.
• 23:31
  SPEAKER_01: We were talking about that report because I wasn't aware of it.
• 23:35
  SPEAKER_01: So I thought there was some really interesting stats that came out of that
• 23:39
  SPEAKER_01: with regard to self-pleasure.
• 23:41
  SPEAKER_01: Really, really interesting.
• 23:42
  SPEAKER_01: I think more people need to know that.
• 23:44
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
• 23:45
  SPEAKER_01: The other thing that I thought was interesting just generally is that
• 23:50
  SPEAKER_01: The more we experience orgasms,
• 23:52
  SPEAKER_01: as you said,
• 23:53
  SPEAKER_01: is that it's not only good for our sexual health,
• 23:55
  SPEAKER_01: but there has been some scientific research apparently that says that it slows down
• 24:01
  SPEAKER_01: the risk of cognitive decline as well.
• 24:04
  SPEAKER_01: So if you're somebody worried like I am always of dementia
• 24:08
  SPEAKER_01: or just cognitive decline, like orgasms do actually supposedly help with that.
• 24:15
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah, and I've seen several studies that support this idea and this is both human
• 24:21
  SPEAKER_00: and animal studies.
• 24:22
  SPEAKER_00: So for example,
• 24:23
  SPEAKER_00: in studies of rats where they're either deprived of sexual activity or allowed
• 24:29
  SPEAKER_00: to engage in it frequently.
• 24:30
  SPEAKER_00: And so, you know,
• 24:32
  SPEAKER_00: it is in part because sex does have these positive effects on the brain and in terms
• 24:35
  SPEAKER_00: of helping to promote better cognitive function.
• 25:01
  SPEAKER_01: Even more reason to use sex toys,
• 25:04
  SPEAKER_01: frankly, because, you know, we can't always have partnered sex.
• 25:08
  SPEAKER_01: And that's the other thing is somebody I spoke to a couple of years ago was talking
• 25:13
  SPEAKER_01: about this research and said, Well, you know, it was during partnered sex.
• 25:18
  SPEAKER_01: And I said, was it?
• 25:19
  SPEAKER_01: Or was it just anything that leads to an orgasm?
• 25:23
  SPEAKER_01: Why do we have to be talking about orgasms in terms of partnered sex?
• 25:27
  SPEAKER_01: Why can't we just be talking about orgasms in terms of self-pleasure?
• 25:31
  SPEAKER_01: I mean,
• 25:31
  SPEAKER_01: there's no reason why we wouldn't get the same benefits from self-pleasure and using
• 25:36
  SPEAKER_01: a toy,
• 25:36
  SPEAKER_01: frankly,
• 25:37
  SPEAKER_01: as we would from partnered sex,
• 25:39
  SPEAKER_01: which, let's face it, if you're a woman, it's not always going to lead to orgasms.
• 25:42
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
• 25:43
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
• 25:43
  SPEAKER_00: And, you know,
• 25:44
  SPEAKER_00: a lot of the benefits of sex and masturbation are the same
• 25:48
  SPEAKER_00: because they are direct byproducts of having an orgasm and the release
• 25:53
  SPEAKER_00: of those neurochemicals that happen when we experience climax.
• 25:56
  SPEAKER_00: And that can do a lot of And
• 26:06
  SPEAKER_00: I think that's one of the main reasons or pathways
• 26:10
  SPEAKER_00: through which masturbation, sex,
• 26:12
  SPEAKER_00: and orgasm are good for our overall health is
• 26:14
  SPEAKER_00: because they help promote better sleep.
• 26:16
  SPEAKER_00: And sleep is so important throughout the lifespan, but especially as we age.
• 26:20
  SPEAKER_00: And oftentimes, as we get older, we have more difficulties when it comes to sleep.
• 26:25
  SPEAKER_00: And If you can use a self-help tool like masturbation,
• 26:29
  SPEAKER_00: if that can help you sleep better,
• 26:31
  SPEAKER_00: that can actually help improve your overall health and well-being.
• 26:34
  SPEAKER_01: And if that wasn't just like the best promotion for sex toys is that it's going
• 26:39
  SPEAKER_01: to give you a good night's sleep, ladies and gentlemen.
• 26:43
  SPEAKER_01: There are a lot of toys out there,
• 26:45
  SPEAKER_01: but if men are looking at toys,
• 26:47
  SPEAKER_01: what are the things that they need to be thinking about when they're choosing them
• 26:50
  SPEAKER_01: in terms of safety, expectations, and just avoiding misinformation?
• 26:56
  SPEAKER_00: Something that's important to keep in mind when it comes to sex toys is
• 26:58
  SPEAKER_00: that they're not all created equally and cheaper is not always better, right?
• 27:03
  SPEAKER_00: There are tons of cheap toys on the market.
• 27:06
  SPEAKER_00: You know,
• 27:06
  SPEAKER_00: you can go on Amazon and you can find the cheapest toy that's out there,
• 27:09
  SPEAKER_00: but it's Probably not going to give you the experience that you want.
• 27:13
  SPEAKER_00: And so I think it's important to look at reviews of toys,
• 27:17
  SPEAKER_00: especially by people who have verified purchased that actual product, right?
• 27:21
  SPEAKER_00: So that you know you're getting an honest appraisal of it.
• 27:24
  SPEAKER_00: Reviews can So again,
• 27:39
  SPEAKER_00: You might have to do some trial and error and try a couple of different toys
• 27:43
  SPEAKER_00: before you find the one that works best.
• 27:54
  SPEAKER_00: A lot of people leave as an afterthought when they purchase a sex toy.
• 27:58
  SPEAKER_00: Like they spend all this time researching it and find the perfect toy and
• 28:01
  SPEAKER_00: then they don't even think about how to take care of it.
• 28:02
  SPEAKER_00: And it's like, well,
• 28:03
  SPEAKER_00: if you're going to spend all this money on a toy,
• 28:05
  SPEAKER_00: make sure that you're investing in proper care and maintenance because that's going
• 28:08
  SPEAKER_00: to help make sure that your toy is So again,
• 28:10
  SPEAKER_00: it's paying attention to the instructions and making sure
• 28:13
  SPEAKER_00: that you're following proper care and maintenance,
• 28:15
  SPEAKER_00: cleaning and using compatible lubes and all those kinds of things.
• 28:33
  SPEAKER_01: All very, very good points, ladies and gentlemen.
• 28:36
  SPEAKER_01: It's not just about buying the toy.
• 28:37
  SPEAKER_01: It's about looking after it as well and making sure that you keep it clean.
• 28:41
  SPEAKER_01: Otherwise,
• 28:41
  SPEAKER_01: it's going to be filled with icky bacteria,
• 28:43
  SPEAKER_01: which could lead to all sorts of things that none of us want.
• 28:47
  SPEAKER_01: Justin, it's been so nice to have you on Sex Advice for Seniors.
• 28:51
  SPEAKER_01: And I feel so privileged to know that I'm actually speaking to somebody
• 28:54
  SPEAKER_01: who was involved in that Kinsey report that I only spoke about like last week.
• 28:58
  SPEAKER_01: That's so cool.
• 28:59
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah, it was one of my favorite studies that we've done and it was a partnership
• 29:02
  SPEAKER_00: with Womanizer and I think the results of that,
• 29:06
  SPEAKER_00: like I've talked about this at so many conferences
• 29:08
  SPEAKER_00: and I can't tell you how many people have come up to me afterwards and said,
• 29:11
  SPEAKER_00: thank you for doing this work.
• 29:13
  SPEAKER_00: What's the next study that you're doing?
• 29:14
  SPEAKER_00: It's been great to have you on Sex Advice for Seniors.
• 29:16
  SPEAKER_00: Have a lovely, day.
• 29:44
  SPEAKER_00: Thanks.
• 29:44
  SPEAKER_00: It was a pleasure to be here.
• 29:48
  SPEAKER_01: Just a quick nudge.
• 29:50
  SPEAKER_01: If you haven't visited sexadviceforseniors.com yet, what are you waiting for?
• 29:55
  SPEAKER_01: It's the place where curiosity, experience, and a little mischief all meet.