Latest / The Nadia Chapman Show / The Skater You Decide to Be: A Lesson in Identity

Transcript

The Skater You Decide to Be: A Lesson in Identity · The Nadia Chapman Show

• 0:05
  Hey everyone, welcome to the Nadia Chapman Show, the figure skaters edition.
• 0:09
  Today we are talking about deciding who you are on the ice.
• 0:14
  That's right. So let me start by saying this very clearly because it's one of
• 0:19
  the most important mindset shift a skater can ever make.
• 0:23
  You do not discover who you are on the ice.
• 0:27
  Drum roll, you decide.
• 0:30
  You just don't suddenly earn the right to skate boldly because the results finally line up.
• 0:36
  That's not the way it works. What actually happens, whether you realize it or
• 0:40
  not, is that every single time you step on the ice, your brain is looking for
• 0:44
  a decision. So not about jumps or not about spins or not about program.
• 0:50
  A decision about your identity. As a mindset coach, I talk about identity a lot.
• 0:56
  So that means who am I when things feel scary?
• 1:01
  Who am I when things feels uncertain?
• 1:03
  Who am I when the pressure is on? And who am I when my body is tired,
• 1:08
  my mind is loud, and skating doesn't feel right right now?
• 1:12
  Because the skaters who look confident aren't waiting for proof.
• 1:17
  They're already deciding who they are, and they skate from that place.
• 1:22
  As I've said before, from a psychological perspective, the brain craves consistency.
• 1:27
  It wants to know what role you're playing so it can better support you.
• 1:30
  Your brain fills the gap.
• 1:32
  It fills the gap with doubt, hesitation, and overthinking.
• 1:35
  That's why some of you, some skaters, feel different every day.
• 1:39
  Confident one day and then shaky another day.
• 1:43
  Not because of their ability, not because their ability changes.
• 1:47
  But because their identity is not stabilized yet.
• 1:51
  But the day that you decide who you are on the ice, you remove that uncertainty.
• 1:56
  So instead of asking, do you feel confident today, you shift to,
• 2:00
  what does someone like me do in this moment in time?
• 2:04
  Someone like me commits. Someone like me finishes.
• 2:08
  Someone like me skates through mistakes. Someone like me trusts their training.
• 2:14
  All right. See where this is going? It's not pretending.
• 2:18
  This is leadership and it's leadership over yourself.
• 2:22
  That's what you need. A lot of skaters wait for confidence to show up way before they go all in.
• 2:28
  But like I say all the time, confident is a response, not a requirement.
• 2:32
  Your nervous system doesn't need certainty.
• 2:35
  It needs direction. So when you hesitate, your brain interprets it as danger.
• 2:40
  But when you decide, ah, the brain follows.
• 2:44
  So the decision creates the feeling, not the other way around.
• 2:47
  That's why the moment you fully commit, even when you're nervous,
• 2:51
  especially when you're nervous, your body starts cooperating.
• 2:55
  Your movements will smooth out and your presence change.
• 2:59
  You didn't suddenly get better. You just stop negotiating with yourself.
• 3:04
  A lot of what I do is just that, telling people stop negotiating with yourself and stop overthinking.
• 3:10
  You know, if you're listening to this as a skater, I want you to take a moment
• 3:15
  right now and really think about this.
• 3:17
  Who are you on the ice?
• 3:19
  Who do you show up as?
• 3:22
  Not who you hope to be one day. They're two completely different things.
• 3:26
  Not who you are when things go perfectly, but who you choose to be when it's
• 3:33
  uncomfortable, when it's scary, when things are uncertain.
• 3:36
  All right. So I want you to play a game with me right now. And I want you to
• 3:39
  finish this sentence with honesty, please.
• 3:43
  On the ice, I am the kind of skater who dot, dot, dot.
• 3:48
  And please don't list your skills, all right? List behaviors.
• 3:53
  You can even journal about this. On the ice, I'm the kind of skater who dot, dot, dot.
• 3:59
  Do you show up steady? Do you stay composed under pressure?
• 4:03
  Do you keep going when things are not perfect? That means a lot.
• 4:07
  Or do you attack instead of protect?
• 4:10
  So now I'm going to tell you. Once you decide who you are on the ice,
• 4:14
  your job is not to feel confident right away. Your job is to act in alignment.
• 4:18
  So that means you commit to the jumps before the doubts shows up.
• 4:22
  You finish programs, even if it's a hot mess and you've made a million mistakes.
• 4:27
  You stay present instead of spiraling in your mind, or you stop shrinking when eyes are on you.
• 4:33
  Identity doesn't require perfection. It doesn't.
• 4:37
  All right. So it requires consistency. And the more often that you act in alignment
• 4:41
  with who you decide to be, all right, on the ice, the more natural it would feel.
• 4:47
  And over time, confidence will stop being something that you have to chase.
• 4:51
  It will become something you recognize.
• 4:53
  And I'm going to give you a little mic drop empowering moment right now.
• 4:58
  The next time you step on the ice, don't ask yourself how I feel.
• 5:03
  Ask yourself who you are. and decided before your brain start negotiating,
• 5:07
  decided before fear gets a vote and decided before the moment passes.
• 5:12
  Because when you choose who you are on the ice, your skating stopped being reactive
• 5:17
  and it started being intentional.
• 5:20
  Two completely different things. And that little decision that you made in your
• 5:24
  mind, that's where everything changes.
• 5:28
  Here's something I tell people I work with. Every single time that you show
• 5:32
  up and you hesitate, your brain learns that uncertainty is in charge.
• 5:36
  And that is huge. So every time that you pull back and you wait for things to
• 5:42
  feel right, you're training your nervous system to associate that with pressure.
• 5:46
  Pressure is danger instead of opportunity.
• 5:49
  But every time that you decide, and by the way, this goes for off ice as well
• 5:54
  in your life, everything you do when you're not at the rink,
• 5:57
  every time that you decide, even imperfectly, okay, to go for it,
• 6:02
  you're teaching your brain something powerful.
• 6:04
  You're teaching your brain, I can be trusted.
• 6:07
  That's what confidence is. Everybody talks about confidence all the time.
• 6:12
  There's a science behind confidence, guys.
• 6:14
  You know, not hype, not pretending that you're fearless, but confidence is a
• 6:20
  history, a history of self-follow through.
• 6:24
  And you build that history. It's up to you.
• 6:27
  And you build that history by choosing how you respond when the moment asks
• 6:32
  more of you than you are ready to give.
• 6:34
  That is very powerful. And this is why two skaters with the same training,
• 6:39
  the same coach, you know, can perform completely differently.
• 6:43
  Pressure is where your identity shows itself.
• 6:46
  Not in practice when everything is comfortable, but in competition warms up,
• 6:50
  in run-throughs that feel off, in programs where everything feels off and the
• 6:54
  shit hits the fan and you have a half a second to decide what kind of skater you are now.
• 7:01
  Do I shrink or do I stay present? Do I panic or do I keep going and I breathe?
• 7:06
  Do I disengage or do I commit?
• 7:09
  Anyway, and those moments are not testing your skills. It goes beyond that.
• 7:13
  They're shaping your identity. That's the lesson today.
• 7:17
  You don't need to wait till you're older. You don't need to wait till you're
• 7:20
  stronger or more experienced.
• 7:22
  All right. You get to decide right now.
• 7:26
  Deciding who you are on the ice doesn't mean you never feel fear.
• 7:31
  Fear will be there and it's always going to be there. It means that fear doesn't get the final say.
• 7:36
  It looks like taking the jump with full approach, even when your mind is loud
• 7:40
  and resetting instead of replaying what just happened. And these moments seem
• 7:45
  small and silly, but they are the exact moment that rewire your belief.
• 7:50
  So you don't need more motivation. You need more alignment.
• 7:54
  So before we go today, I want you to think about the next time that you'll step onto the ice.
• 7:59
  Not someday, but the very next session. Maybe it's later today. Maybe it's tomorrow.
• 8:04
  Ask yourself quietly, if I fully
• 8:06
  trusted myself today, how would I skate differently? Think about that.
• 8:12
  Would you attack instead of hesitate? Would you hold your posture a little longer?
• 8:16
  Would you commit instead of protecting?
• 8:18
  Now decide before you even lace up who you're going to be.
• 8:23
  Not based on your mood and not based on the last result you got. Based on your identity.
• 8:30
  So here's what I want you to remember from today's episode. You're not waiting
• 8:34
  to become the confident skater.
• 8:36
  You're becoming one through the decisions you make time and time again when
• 8:41
  no one is clapping for you.
• 8:44
  The ice doesn't need you to be perfect. It needs you to be decisive.
• 8:48
  It needs you to trust yourself enough to show up fully.
• 8:52
  So next time that you step onto the ice, don't ask yourself, am I ready?
• 8:58
  Decide who you are and skate from that place.
• 9:02
  That choice will carry you way further than self-doubt and fear ever could.
• 9:07
  All right, you've got this. You can do this. Go lace up, go have fun,
• 9:12
  and show up with a different identity. Thanks for listening.