Latest / Mommywood / Creative storytelling, Yoga, Musical Improv and life on the other side of a dream come true - Anna Agniel Bushlack

Transcript

Creative storytelling, Yoga, Musical Improv and life on the other side of a dream come true - Anna Agniel Bushlack · Mommywood

• 0:00
  Mom. Hey, I'm your host, Emily Bolt.
• 0:10
  I'm an actor, teacher, and a new mom.
• 0:13
  Once I became pregnant, I went on a hunt for answers to all my
• 0:17
  questions about being a working actor.
• 0:19
  Mom. And what did I find?
• 0:22
  Practically nothing. So here I am asking all the
• 0:25
  questions to try to figure out how people do it.
• 0:28
  How are mothers balancing and not balancing parenthood in this
• 0:33
  crazy industry? Join me and my amazing guest as
• 0:37
  we take a real look into the lives of working moms in the
• 0:41
  entertainment industry. On today's episode of Mommywood,
• 0:45
  I'm talking with Anna and Yell Bushlack and it was such a joy.
• 0:51
  I've known Anna since I was probably about 8:00, and it was
• 0:57
  really full circle to talk to her now about motherhood and
• 1:03
  being a creative artist. And it was so great to hear all
• 1:10
  of the things she's done, the places she's been and how she's
• 1:13
  been able to fill her creative soul in markets that you
• 1:21
  wouldn't necessarily think of, and how she's been able to
• 1:27
  combine things like yoga with storytelling and doing musical
• 1:34
  improv and just really finding her niche.
• 1:38
  And she currently lives in Saint Louis with her family, and she's
• 1:43
  really been able to find her place in Saint Louis and find
• 1:49
  success and what success looks like for her now.
• 1:54
  And we talk about how the vision of success, whatever that means,
• 2:00
  can change over time and how what you do after on the other
• 2:06
  side of a dream, when a dream comes true.
• 2:09
  She had her one woman show and she toured with this amazing
• 2:13
  show that she wrote about her sister and what it looked like
• 2:18
  on the other side of a dream once something that you've
• 2:22
  wanted to do comes true. And what you do on the other
• 2:25
  side of that and then what it means to lose yourself and not
• 2:35
  have that creative outlet And then coming around on the other
• 2:40
  side and figuring that all out. This was such a wonderful
• 2:46
  conversation. And she is in Saint Louis with
• 2:52
  her family, which was really cool to hear about all the
• 2:55
  creative places and things that people can do in Saint Louis.
• 3:02
  It's great and I really hope you get a lot out of this episode.
• 3:08
  Anna is such a beautiful soul, beautiful person and has three
• 3:13
  beautiful children. And I hope you enjoy this
• 3:17
  episode of Mommywood with Anna and yell bushlack.
• 3:23
  Oh my God, I'm so excited to talk to you.
• 3:26
  I was just thinking like I was like, wow, Anna has really done
• 3:35
  so much for me personally. What?
• 3:41
  Like I was thinking, Do you? You might not even remember when
• 3:45
  I was looking at colleges applying, you helped me with my
• 3:53
  I had to do a Shakespeare monologue and you helped me,
• 3:57
  like, translate it and like all of the things.
• 4:03
  And then and then, of course, you let me live with you in.
• 4:09
  Chicago for like 5 weeks, six years, 8 weeks.
• 4:15
  I don't know. It was a long time and I'm like,
• 4:20
  you just let me live with her. In.
• 4:24
  High school. You're like my surrogate little
• 4:26
  sister, but like, looking back on that, I was like, Oh my God,
• 4:32
  I don't know if I had the capacity to even thank you
• 4:37
  enough, but yeah, looking back, I'm like, holy shit.
• 4:43
  What a great person. You.
• 4:47
  Are. That's very kind and it must be
• 4:51
  said that I would not have allowed someone to come live.
• 4:54
  With me if they. Were a total asshole.
• 4:56
  So basically like you are a gem of a human being that is easy to
• 5:02
  have around. When you and your guitar, I
• 5:04
  mean, do you not remember that you're like strumming and
• 5:07
  playing and singing and that's. A delight.
• 5:10
  To have around, I know I need to get back into playing.
• 5:13
  Yeah. It's funny to look back and be
• 5:15
  like, I was like a senior in high school and I was like, I'm
• 5:18
  going to go to Chicago and then I'll just, like, play some open
• 5:21
  mic. Yeah.
• 5:23
  Yeah. Takes guts, yeah, yeah, I need
• 5:26
  some more of those guts again, do you feel like?
• 5:29
  Do you feel like you're? Lacking in the guts, I guess.
• 5:33
  I mean, I mean, I guess I'm still here, I'm still in LA.
• 5:39
  I'm still pursuing. I feel like, I guess that takes
• 5:43
  guts, but I haven't. I haven't done any songwriting
• 5:51
  or music for myself in a long time.
• 5:54
  And I was talking to my mom when she was visiting and I was like,
• 5:59
  what did I like say I wanted to be when I grow up?
• 6:03
  And she was like, she was like most of the time you wanted to
• 6:09
  be a singer and I. Was like, wow, interesting like
• 6:14
  that. I was like, well, maybe I'm not
• 6:16
  as talented in this and I'll just go like, I don't know,
• 6:19
  Emily. That OK, let's back up.
• 6:22
  Back up, back up. I should be Taylor Swift.
• 6:27
  You are. You are overflowing with talent.
• 6:32
  It's it's all about choosing which path is going to give you
• 6:36
  the most energy, yes. Because everything is going to
• 6:40
  take energy. Yeah, right.
• 6:43
  And all of it's going to be like sucking our soul.
• 6:48
  So which? Path.
• 6:50
  As as that energy's coming at us, which path are we on?
• 6:54
  That feels like, you know what? This is giving me energy as much
• 7:00
  as it's demanding of me, yeah. It's not about the talent
• 7:04
  because you got so much talent and you're just pinky finger.
• 7:10
  Well, thank you. Oh, you're sweet.
• 7:14
  OK, so let's I OK, so first of all, tell me like your tell us
• 7:22
  your kids names and their ages. OK.
• 7:27
  Yes. So I have Sean way.
• 7:30
  I know I'm just going to die. Sean is 14.
• 7:34
  No, he's not. I don't.
• 7:36
  Yes, yes he is. And just got his cell phone.
• 7:42
  We we've really held out for as long as possible.
• 7:46
  Told us that he's the only person who doesn't have a phone.
• 7:49
  Who knows if that's true? Might be, but 14.
• 7:54
  Then Audrey just turned 12 and she was just in the school
• 8:01
  spring musical. Annie.
• 8:03
  She was Annie, No. Oh my God.
• 8:07
  Yes, she was dying. She.
• 8:10
  Did a great job. She did such a great job.
• 8:15
  Yeah, and Sean was in it too. He was FDR, so he was in a
• 8:19
  wheelchair. And then my niece Mia, was Miss
• 8:24
  Hannigan. So there was a.
• 8:25
  Whole contingent. It was a delight.
• 8:29
  Oh, that's so fun. It was super fun.
• 8:32
  So Audrey, 12 and then Frankie girl Frankie is 9 1/2.
• 8:39
  Oh my God, you. Wow.
• 8:41
  How? Also Cecilia, my producer.
• 8:45
  She's her son's name is Frankie. Oh, it's a great name.
• 8:51
  Yeah, Yeah. Yeah, so my daughter is Francis,
• 8:54
  except it's an ES instead of an IS on the end.
• 8:58
  It's a great. It's so fun, Frankie.
• 9:00
  Yeah, OK. And wait before we move on.
• 9:02
  Sweet May. How old is she now?
• 9:07
  She'll be 11 months next week. Whoa.
• 9:11
  I know. I'm.
• 9:12
  I don't. I don't understand how time
• 9:15
  works when it comes to children, like when you're younger and
• 9:20
  it's like. The school year and summer seems
• 9:24
  so long and now it's like I have not aged or like feel like I've
• 9:36
  like, I don't feel like I've done anything with my life, but
• 9:39
  like, you know for the past year I'm like, well, I'm I haven't
• 9:43
  gotten older, how is she already 11 months?
• 9:48
  Like time is really a a mind fuck.
• 9:52
  Yes, it is and. 12 months? I feel like it's just a
• 9:57
  celebration of mom and dad. Way to go.
• 10:00
  You made it through the first year.
• 10:02
  You survived. Yeah.
• 10:04
  I feel like once you get there, you're like, OK, it's not as
• 10:07
  easy to mess up anything anymore.
• 10:11
  Right. Yes, I can breathe a little bit.
• 10:13
  She's sturdy. She she she's eaten peanut
• 10:19
  butter. She's got.
• 10:20
  Yes. It's a.
• 10:21
  It feels huge, doesn't it? Really does it's.
• 10:25
  And then looking to other people where you're like, because now
• 10:30
  I'm looking at you and I'll be like, my gosh, her kids are like
• 10:35
  grunt, like you've probably got it all figured out.
• 10:37
  And then when he's nine years old, I'll be like, oh, this is
• 10:40
  what Anna was going. Through OK, I thought everything
• 10:47
  was great. And because I think of that for
• 10:50
  everyone who's like a little stage above where I'm like, oh,
• 10:54
  they they're ahead of me. They got this part figured out
• 10:58
  and it's like, Oh no. Oh no, Oh no.
• 11:01
  If you handed me an 11 month old I would be as confused of like I
• 11:07
  don't know why are why are they crying?
• 11:08
  Who knows? What else do they need?
• 11:11
  God only knows. Yeah, nobody knows.
• 11:14
  Nobody knows. OK, so give me just your little
• 11:22
  background of like before, before having kids.
• 11:28
  Like where you were leading, leading up, like to that your
• 11:34
  whole life story before. Just kidding.
• 11:37
  Well, like I guess more career, career wise.
• 11:43
  And things, yeah. So my training is in theater,
• 11:47
  both acting and playwriting. And then I used that and created
• 11:52
  my own one woman show. That I toured around to
• 11:55
  different cities, fringe festivals, schools and was both
• 12:01
  performing and teaching. And that the show was about my
• 12:06
  younger sister who's developmentally delayed and she
• 12:09
  had her first psychotic break when we were teenagers.
• 12:13
  So the The One Woman show looked at my sister both as a young kid
• 12:19
  and then through that psychotic break.
• 12:22
  And then on the other side of it, so I was, I was teaching
• 12:25
  both about, you know, the differences inside of community
• 12:31
  and how we can step past stereotypes to to see like the
• 12:36
  greater truth underneath. And as I was traveling around, I
• 12:40
  got to go to New York and perform in the New York
• 12:44
  International Fringe Festival. I was out in LA for the Los
• 12:47
  Angeles Women's Theater Festival and.
• 12:51
  As I did that, I thought, I'm kind of on the other side of a
• 12:53
  dream. Like I've had this dream, I've
• 12:55
  wanted to do this, and I knew that I wanted to shift my life
• 12:59
  in some way, but I wasn't sure. And then I met my now husband.
• 13:04
  So I took a right turn from Chicago, where I was living at
• 13:09
  the time, to South Bend IN which isn't that far.
• 13:15
  But he was getting a PhD at the University of Notre Dame and I
• 13:19
  thought, well, this is no big deal.
• 13:21
  What ology. Yeah.
• 13:25
  Yeah. So PhD in ethics.
• 13:30
  Yeah, yeah. So I I did a little bit of
• 13:34
  teaching in high school in South Bend and then went into arts
• 13:40
  administration. Where I was a house manager and
• 13:43
  I was managing live performance events, thousands of people.
• 13:48
  Yeah, I mean it was, it was high pressure, a lot of customer
• 13:54
  service, a lot of knowledge about the arts, but not creative
• 14:01
  myself. So that's where I was when I had
• 14:06
  my first child, and. I would say I was probably
• 14:10
  creatively stifled because I was just, I mean I'd fallen in love
• 14:15
  and created this like amazing relationship that I knew was
• 14:20
  where I was supposed to be. But I'd moved to a very small
• 14:22
  town that I felt like didn't have a lot of creative
• 14:25
  opportunities. It it was nothing like Chicago.
• 14:31
  So that's that's where I was where I was.
• 14:33
  I think I was still hanging in that space of.
• 14:37
  What do I do on the other side of that dream?
• 14:41
  And it became the creation of a dream about family.
• 14:46
  But the creativity piece was something I was still trying to
• 14:49
  figure out, yeah. Yeah, that's that's hard because
• 14:56
  when did how did you make that decision when you were in
• 15:04
  Chicago? So did you guys meet?
• 15:06
  You and your husband meet in Chicago, or how did you guys
• 15:09
  meet? I was, I was touring my one
• 15:13
  woman show. My older brother had started a
• 15:17
  master's program at Notre Dame and so a bunch of their friends
• 15:21
  were R A's in the dorms and they they had a little bit of
• 15:25
  programming money and so they put their programming money
• 15:28
  together, brought me to Notre Dame.
• 15:31
  So I performed at the university.
• 15:34
  And then afterwards, my brother and his wife, Susie, and a bunch
• 15:39
  of their friends took me out. And that's where I met my
• 15:42
  husband. Yeah.
• 15:46
  Yeah. So his first experience of me
• 15:49
  was through my performance. Yeah, So, so you were still
• 15:56
  touring. So what was that decision like
• 16:00
  to move to Indiana with him? How long?
• 16:05
  Like what was that process like? Because we're so you were
• 16:10
  touring when you met him then, were you?
• 16:15
  Was he in Indiana and you were in still touring?
• 16:20
  Yes. Was it long distance for a
• 16:23
  little while? Yeah, it was.
• 16:25
  And there's a train that goes back and forth between Chicago
• 16:29
  and South Bend. It's called the South Shoreline,
• 16:31
  right? I know it will, and I think that
• 16:36
  it seems forever. You said it's not that far, it
• 16:32
  seemed. I know well, deceptively, I
• 16:40
  thought I can move to South Bend.
• 16:42
  I can always take the train back in to Chicago whenever I need
• 16:46
  to. I was working at Trader Joe's in
• 16:50
  Chicago and it felt like. My life is transient, You know,
• 16:55
  I have the ability to pick up and and go do these other
• 16:58
  things. And so I'd also been a part of
• 17:03
  previous relationships that didn't feel as genuine and true
• 17:08
  as this one. So I think it was a good time.
• 17:12
  I was, I was experiencing that sensation of them on the other
• 17:15
  side of this dream about this theatrical production.
• 17:19
  I'm ready to create some kind of a shift.
• 17:22
  Why not explore this relationship, especially when my
• 17:26
  family, my brother and sisterinlaw are are there I can
• 17:30
  go live with? Them, which is what I.
• 17:32
  Did I moved in with them and they were pregnant with their
• 17:36
  first baby and so I got to be a a doula in their birthing room
• 17:42
  And I mean, I'm not, I'm not a registered doula but I got to
• 17:47
  help and so like there were so many pluses in my mind.
• 17:51
  Of making that switch. But I I just.
• 17:55
  I didn't. I didn't fully take in what it
• 17:59
  would be like to leave the creative world of Chicago.
• 18:04
  Yeah. Because when you were still in
• 18:05
  Chicago, were you still pursuing, were you like,
• 18:10
  auditioning or how was that? And then how was the decision?
• 18:15
  Yeah, when you decided to move. So you thought like I could do
• 18:20
  both and then it ended up? Yeah, I thought I can be back
• 18:24
  and forth between both places more easily.
• 18:28
  I was in talks with an organization in Chicago who was
• 18:32
  willing to like put some money behind my performance and and
• 18:38
  maybe do some more performances in the Chicago area.
• 18:41
  But they wanted me to change the performance in some ways and.
• 18:47
  I'm sure that there was a part of me that's like, I don't
• 18:49
  really want to change what I'm doing.
• 18:51
  It's my this is my piece. But I think I also had an
• 18:57
  erroneous belief that I was like, yes, I can still continue
• 19:01
  to figure this out even if I'm living an hour and a half away.
• 19:07
  So there were still things happening.
• 19:10
  But I just slowly like unhooked from the Chicago area.
• 19:14
  I mean friends of mine had a theater company in Chicago and I
• 19:17
  was doing some work with them, but I was also looking at
• 19:22
  masters programs and and thinking about do I do I move
• 19:25
  away from Chicago for other reasons.
• 19:27
  So I think I was just, I was in a space where I wanted to change
• 19:32
  and it just so happened that I fell in love in that same time.
• 19:35
  And then it just worked out. So then you were So then how
• 19:38
  long were you in Indiana? Five years and then.
• 19:45
  Our first two kids were born in Indiana and then we moved to
• 19:50
  Minnesota. That's where he got his first
• 19:52
  academic position, and that's when I was able to I wasn't the
• 20:00
  breadwinner anymore. So then I was able to put
• 20:03
  together a demo, a voice over demo reel.
• 20:07
  And I got fresh headshots taken and I started as a teaching
• 20:11
  artist with an after school program and I really started
• 20:15
  diving back into creativity as I had young kids.
• 20:21
  How? How was that?
• 20:23
  Because that seemed That's so awkward.
• 20:26
  Yeah, because you have two young kids.
• 20:28
  You're I guess like you were saying more, it's more of
• 20:33
  getting back. Into it after a bit.
• 20:37
  And then, yeah, what? What did that look like?
• 20:42
  Were you able to have, like, help with the kids, or were you
• 20:48
  just juggling everything? Or like, how did that look for
• 20:53
  you? Like, logistically?
• 20:55
  Yeah. So at that, at that time, I
• 20:59
  could bring the kids with me to a voice over audition, and the
• 21:05
  agents didn't mind. The kids sitting up in the lobby
• 21:10
  and I would go down to the recording studio in the
• 21:13
  basement, record the audition and then come back up and and
• 21:17
  go. If I booked a gig.
• 21:20
  I was heavily reliant upon our next door neighbors.
• 21:23
  We just had these amazing next door neighbors who really
• 21:26
  enveloped our children and. They would pop in and stay with
• 21:32
  the kids or, but it was definitely more difficult.
• 21:37
  I mean, hands down, more difficult to juggle kids.
• 21:41
  Yeah, So. Well, that's so cool that you
• 21:44
  were getting into voice over and stuff when you were in
• 21:48
  Minnesota. How fun is that?
• 21:50
  Wait, you said Minnesota, right? Yes, yes, yes.
• 21:53
  All of a sudden I was like, wait, did I have a stroke?
• 21:54
  What's going on? Well, so I guess at the
• 21:58
  University of Notre Dame, while I was still working, they put me
• 22:03
  to work on some commercials. And so I did some voiceover
• 22:06
  work, unpaid voiceover work for the university that I loved.
• 22:14
  And I took some of those recordings with me.
• 22:18
  And when I brought them to the sound engineer in Minnesota, he
• 22:22
  was like, we can't use these. And I'm like, okay, that's fine.
• 22:25
  Well, just. Create a new one, but I think
• 22:27
  that's where I I first had the idea of if I'm going to jump
• 22:31
  back in, I'd like to jump back in using my voice and that way I
• 22:35
  don't have to worry about what this mom body looks like right
• 22:40
  now. But as soon as the agent heard
• 22:44
  my reel and looked at my resume, she was like, okay, I want you
• 22:47
  to go get headshots taken and we're going to send you out for
• 22:49
  some on camera auditions. Sorry, you're actually an actor.
• 22:54
  Can you? Can you?
• 22:57
  Do some of that also. I mean, it's so interesting
• 23:03
  about our bodies and things like that, where I obviously as a
• 23:08
  woman, as an actor, we feel the whole stupid, like bounce back
• 23:17
  or just vanity or you know? At the very least, like feeling
• 23:23
  comfortable in our these new newly.
• 23:27
  Formed. Bodies out.
• 23:31
  So yeah, that is how. How did that play out for you?
• 23:38
  Once you were like okay, well now I'm going to have to get
• 23:41
  these headshots. Was were you just kind of like
• 23:44
  okay This is is what it is or was there any type of?
• 23:51
  Like hesitancy. Yeah, yes, I I think there's
• 23:56
  definitely a hesitancy to be seen, To be fully seen as a mom
• 24:07
  is a much softer. And I mean, I get this, I get
• 24:15
  this sensation of just like, I mean my my kids are just
• 24:19
  constantly around and in and snuggly.
• 24:26
  You know, it's not a presentational space.
• 24:31
  It is A and hopefully, I mean this is my.
• 24:35
  My hope is that that's what my kids feel is that it is A and
• 24:40
  warm accepting environment. But a lot of times that feels in
• 24:44
  opposition to what's going on in a headshot or what's happening
• 24:49
  in an audition. Yeah, yeah, for sure.
• 24:53
  So yeah, it feels really weird. And I also just felt like we
• 24:59
  didn't have a ton of money and I didn't want to go out and buy
• 25:01
  new clothes, but a lot of my clothes were still like either
• 25:05
  post maternity squishy space. Like, what size am I?
• 25:11
  I don't know. It's just whatever fits today.
• 25:16
  Absolutely. Yeah.
• 25:17
  I I feel like I keep trying on pants and then I'll be like I'm
• 25:21
  buying them because they fit. Yes.
• 25:24
  Then I'm like, I don't wanna I'm, I will not buy a whole new
• 25:29
  wardrobe. But then things are like okay,
• 25:31
  they fit here, not in this place anymore, because it doesn't.
• 25:36
  Even. It's not so much like my body's
• 25:39
  going to go back to what it was before.
• 25:41
  It's, it's. Different, it's different organs
• 25:46
  have been rearranged. Ryan and it takes like I it
• 25:51
  takes almost a year for them to like fully at least go back to.
• 25:57
  Where they were in your body, regardless of like the other
• 26:00
  things. Yes.
• 26:03
  It's it's very bizarre. Well, I've been doing a lot of
• 26:06
  research about what happens biologically inside of moms as
• 26:14
  they house a human being and then give birth to that human
• 26:19
  being. The ways in which our cells are
• 26:22
  like truly linked or syncing up with the babies they we are we
• 26:28
  are a fully changed human from start to finish.
• 26:33
  And some of the research that I read was that the female brain
• 26:39
  if you look at a scan of the brain prior to giving birth and
• 26:45
  then you look at a scan of the brain after giving birth, there
• 26:49
  is there's a reduction of like some of the the Gray matter
• 26:55
  similar to someone who experiences brain injuries.
• 27:01
  So like that level of trauma that the body goes through,
• 27:06
  which is a beautiful, wondrous, powerful thing.
• 27:11
  But it's trauma. Yeah, that's that's so
• 27:17
  interesting. I feel like there's not enough,
• 27:21
  honestly, sadly, I feel like because it's women and not men
• 27:25
  that there's just not enough studies and blah blah blah.
• 27:31
  Like there's not enough information.
• 27:33
  I'm like, we've sent. People to the moon, and we don't
• 27:38
  know how female bodies still actually really work.
• 27:44
  It's. Insane.
• 27:46
  I guess So. All that to say, I mean it's it
• 27:51
  was a daily practice of being gentle with myself in getting
• 27:56
  headshots and then getting those headshots back and me like, OKI
• 28:00
  mean, I. Guess this is it.
• 28:03
  Yes, this is as good as it's going to get.
• 28:07
  Sure, they were beautiful. Well, and then it's hard
• 28:09
  because, yeah, not all headshots are meant to be.
• 28:14
  Especially now. Like, it's shifted where it's
• 28:17
  like we want what you look like. It's not a pretty like, glamour
• 28:22
  shot anymore. This is this is what I look
• 28:28
  like. Yes.
• 28:29
  Yeah, and it's not even on my great day.
• 28:34
  On a day this is what I look like.
• 28:39
  And and it's, it's fine. So it's it's a level of except
• 28:46
  instead of projecting out what I hope people see or what or how I
• 28:51
  hope I come across, there's a level of acceptance of this is
• 28:56
  this is just who I am because you have life choices that I
• 28:59
  have made. That are inherent in my body.
• 29:03
  Now I carry myself differently, whether I like it or not.
• 29:09
  Yeah. Oh boy.
• 29:13
  So how did your goals then? Or?
• 29:21
  Maybe not even goals, but priorities or whatever.
• 29:24
  When it came comes to your creativity and like artistic
• 29:32
  career, how did those change? Like once you had your kids and
• 29:39
  then how have they shifted throughout that?
• 29:46
  Yeah. Their ages, yeah.
• 29:50
  Well, I think that's why I was so interested in doing voice
• 29:53
  over and on camera auditions. Because though I missed theater,
• 29:59
  I didn't want to commit to a long rehearsal process or
• 30:03
  performance schedule that would take me away from home in the
• 30:08
  evenings or on the weekends. I wanted to be home.
• 30:12
  So I was interested in finding ways to be creative that that
• 30:17
  when I would get paid. And two, that would be a lower
• 30:23
  amount of time and could possibly fit into my life as a
• 30:27
  as a mom easier. Then Speaking of getting paid,
• 30:34
  how were between certain jobs of like artistic jobs, what was
• 30:40
  like your steady? Did you have a a steady source
• 30:47
  of income? Yeah.
• 30:49
  So that was working as an after school program coordinator for a
• 30:54
  program called Synergy and it was for middle school students
• 30:59
  and they would look at issues that they saw in their own
• 31:02
  schools and then create a performance about that.
• 31:07
  So lots of times it was about bullying.
• 31:09
  Sometimes they knew somebody who had cancer and so it was about
• 31:13
  cancer awareness. Or there was a super cool
• 31:16
  performance that a group of students put together where they
• 31:19
  witnessed somebody being bullied on a bus.
• 31:24
  And so they recreated the bus as the performance and then like
• 31:29
  incorporated song and dance with it.
• 31:31
  I mean, like, I I watched kids do some really incredible
• 31:34
  things. So I I was a program coordinator
• 31:39
  for that after school program for a number of years while my
• 31:42
  kids were really young. And and then I also worked for
• 31:45
  the Y, which was another I loved, loved working for the Y.
• 31:49
  And I got certified to teach kids yoga as well as teach
• 31:55
  theater. And then my kids could come to
• 31:57
  the little, like childcare area and I would sometimes work in
• 32:01
  the childcare area or be teaching classes.
• 32:06
  Yeah. Did you so you guys certified to
• 32:10
  teach yoga, but it sounds like you have you've had so much
• 32:14
  experience in jobs that to me sounds like I would be like I'm
• 32:21
  not qualified or like how did those jobs come to you or how
• 32:25
  did you did you have to get like other certifications or was it
• 32:30
  just like you had? You have the skill set and it
• 32:35
  was like they needed somebody. Like, how did that work?
• 32:38
  I got emergency certified my first year in South Bend.
• 32:44
  The A teacher took a medical leave and it was in English,
• 32:48
  teaching English to high school students, something like 4-3 or
• 32:53
  four sections of sophomores and then a section of juniors and
• 32:57
  seniors. And the reason that somebody
• 33:01
  came and asked me to do it was because of studying Shakespeare.
• 33:06
  And they were, they were going to be studying Julius Caesar.
• 33:08
  So I got thrown into, I mean not thrown into.
• 33:13
  I volunteered myself to be this high school teacher for six
• 33:17
  months, but we were primarily working on Julius Caesar, and so
• 33:22
  I just pulled from my acting ability and script analysis,
• 33:27
  which I think is so fun. And then we we just walked
• 33:31
  through Julius Caesar that semester.
• 33:34
  Wow. So then you got emergency
• 33:38
  certified for emergency certified, Yeah.
• 33:41
  So. For actually teaching, Wow,
• 33:45
  things work out. That's so crazy.
• 33:47
  They do. And if I had chosen to keep
• 33:49
  going, and there were different times in my life where I
• 33:51
  thought, maybe I'll go get a master's in education and that
• 33:55
  way I compare this and I couldn't, I I could have chosen
• 33:59
  to do that. It was because this school was
• 34:02
  just in a lurch. That they.
• 34:04
  They they can do a temporary emergency certification.
• 34:09
  That's wild. So, so then from South Bend to
• 34:15
  Minnesota, then we're next. Yeah.
• 34:18
  So then we were in Minnesota for five years, and then in 2016 we
• 34:24
  moved to Saint Louis. So my husband's from Minnesota
• 34:28
  and I'm from. Saint Louis.
• 34:29
  And so I finally said. Please, I really can't go home.
• 34:34
  Yeah. What did?
• 34:36
  What did that decision look like?
• 34:38
  It was it just I'm ready to be near my family.
• 34:42
  Yeah, That was that was it primarily, I I mean, yeah, I
• 34:49
  think. It's that's I.
• 34:51
  Mean. That's all it takes, that that
• 34:53
  was really it. Yeah, yeah.
• 34:57
  I I think it's Simply put my My husband still misses Minnesota,
• 35:01
  loves Minnesota, We loved the Twin Cities.
• 35:04
  The Twin Cities are phenomenal. And if my family didn't live in
• 35:08
  Saint Louis, I think we would have just stayed in Minnesota.
• 35:13
  But especially with, What's that?
• 35:17
  That's where his family is. That's where, yeah, his parents
• 35:20
  are in Minnesota six months of the year and then they do six
• 35:25
  months in Florida. Now, how far is Minnesota from
• 35:32
  Saint Louis? It's a 10 to 12 hour drive,
• 35:35
  depending on how much time. Not, not quite a trip, no, no,
• 35:42
  it's a big. It was a big move.
• 35:44
  It was a really big move. So that was.
• 35:47
  So you moved with with your two older and then you had.
• 35:53
  Your third No. So we moved with our two oldest
• 35:57
  kids from South Bend to Minnesota across the country
• 36:00
  with a 2 1/2 year old and an infant.
• 36:03
  And then in 2016, we moved from Minnesota to Saint Louis across
• 36:07
  the country with three kids and. I don't know how time works.
• 36:13
  With Nanas. It is bananas to move across the
• 36:16
  country with tiny children. Yeah, how old was?
• 36:21
  It's Frankie's, the youngest Was she then?
• 36:26
  Yeah, yeah. Well, that makes sense.
• 36:32
  You're like, I'm ready to be near my family with all these
• 36:35
  kids. Yeah.
• 36:37
  I mean, I feel, yeah, I was thinking about that when I was
• 36:42
  watching like the kids I teach perform and having like their
• 36:47
  parents or whoever there. And then I was like, oh.
• 36:51
  If she's in a show. Yeah.
• 36:53
  Kind of like blank and it's, it's, it's.
• 36:57
  No joke. Yeah.
• 36:58
  Well, my husband's an only child and then my older brother is was
• 37:03
  here in Saint Louis and he has four kids.
• 37:06
  So at the time my kids only cousins were in Saint Louis and
• 37:12
  I thought, I really want them to be around their cousins.
• 37:16
  I, I, and then when we moved here where my my niece is in, go
• 37:22
  to school. That's where my kids now go to
• 37:24
  school and my children line up with my brother's 3 youngest.
• 37:29
  So they've been in school with their cousins for the past seven
• 37:33
  years, and it's adorable. They get to be in shows
• 37:38
  together. They are in a show.
• 37:40
  It's amazing, Emily. I mean, it was phenomenal.
• 37:43
  Going to die? That's so sweet.
• 37:45
  It makes my heart ache. It does.
• 37:51
  It's I feel like that's such we are not ready but that and I see
• 37:59
  that as if we will be ready to move home at some my home not
• 38:04
  present but move back at some point but it's not that like I
• 38:08
  see that in the future but it is it.
• 38:13
  The more and more it is, it gets just.
• 38:17
  Harder and harder. It is a poll.
• 38:33
  Yeah, it's. It's an ache, yeah.
• 38:24
  I don't think it means that you have to ever move home.
• 38:28
  You don't have to ever act upon that.
• 38:30
  But it is an ache that I think always.
• 38:36
  So when you moved to Saint Louis, then what?
• 38:42
  What did that look like? Obviously I know why you moved,
• 38:50
  but but then what sort of things?
• 38:55
  Because I feel like you've had a few shifts in in different jobs
• 39:03
  since you've been back to Saint Louis, and I would love to hear
• 39:07
  more about the storytelling workshops and things that you're
• 39:11
  teaching. Now and the improv that you're
• 39:14
  doing and how has all come to see because I think also I love
• 39:22
  that we're talking about these cities that like are not Los
• 39:28
  Angeles. They're not Chicago.
• 39:29
  It's not I, it's not New York where it's like you because I
• 39:33
  feel like so many people think and even me being like, well, if
• 39:38
  I moved to Saint Louis, that's I'm.
• 39:41
  I'm not pursuing anymore, but I love that you've found so much
• 39:50
  in Saint Louis and in these other cities to fill you
• 39:54
  creatively. And one of my friends is in
• 39:57
  Saint Louis and she's started doing like commercial auditions
• 40:01
  also. And I'm like this is great.
• 40:03
  Yes, yes. It is incredible to discover
• 40:07
  just how much is going on on a local level.
• 40:12
  I I have the benefit of someone that I was friends with in high
• 40:15
  school. Started the improv shop here in
• 40:18
  Saint Louis, so I got in. I know before I moved back I got
• 40:27
  in touch with him and just said, hey, give me an update on just
• 40:30
  what are the things that are happening around town that you
• 40:33
  are really interested in. And he said you should really
• 40:35
  come see the improv shop and like to see the things that
• 40:38
  we're doing here. And he kept saying, Whatever you
• 40:43
  want to teach here, just come. And I said I don't have any
• 40:46
  improv, formal improv training. I did do improv.
• 40:49
  I did musical improv in Chicago for the Noble School Theater.
• 40:56
  Musical improv. Now that that's one.
• 40:58
  I have a ton of improv experience, but I've yet to do
• 41:02
  the musical. So that's what we do every
• 41:06
  month. We put on an improvised musical.
• 41:12
  And it is a blast. And it is so terrifying and
• 41:17
  exhilarating at the same time. It's nice to not have to
• 41:23
  prepare, though, right? Well, it is.
• 41:24
  Not bad. Not.
• 41:29
  Bad. But it was through that
• 41:31
  connection with my friend Kevin that I eventually said, you know
• 41:37
  what I'd really love? I would really love since I did
• 41:39
  my own one woman show. I would really love to do
• 41:43
  storytelling. I would love to get people up on
• 41:45
  their feet telling their personal stories.
• 41:49
  And he said great, we'll we'll put you on the next roster and
• 41:52
  we'll try to get people to fill your class.
• 41:55
  And that's how I started doing storytelling classes, was just
• 41:59
  through the improv shop. And the more I did that and I
• 42:03
  got some people to come to those classes, they some, some of the
• 42:07
  students said, you know what I really need?
• 42:08
  I need a writing class. If you were teaching a writing
• 42:12
  class, I would take it and I was like, OKI guess I'll do that
• 42:14
  too. So then I put the other writing
• 42:17
  class and and it's just been like piece by piece, that I've
• 42:21
  started a more consistent teaching on a yearly basis of
• 42:27
  either live storytelling, writing creative nonfiction, and
• 42:35
  then working one-on-one with clients.
• 42:37
  So I've had people who've put together their own solo
• 42:39
  performances. I've had people who are working
• 42:42
  on memoirs, someone who was doing a collection of poetry,
• 42:46
  but it was poetry about their life and yeah, someone else who
• 42:51
  wanted to do a children's book. And I said, that is not my
• 42:56
  expertise, but I'm happy to give you some writing prompts or like
• 42:59
  look at what you're working on. And so I've just started working
• 43:02
  with different people, both here in Saint Louis and then through
• 43:05
  Zoom. And while I was at the improv
• 43:09
  shop teaching, I started meeting some other people who were
• 43:14
  putting together a musical improv team.
• 43:17
  And because I'd had that experience in Chicago, I
• 43:20
  thought, sure, why not? I'll I can do that.
• 43:23
  I can make up a song on the spot.
• 43:26
  And so for the past five years we've formed this team that now
• 43:32
  we're we are performing for. I mean we we sell out our our
• 43:36
  house on a monthly, sometimes twice monthly basis.
• 43:43
  It's. So fun and so crazy.
• 43:47
  It sounds like you've really like found your your piece.
• 43:54
  I don't know what the word is, I'll just say that.
• 43:57
  Well, I think it's also letting go of the the vision in my head
• 44:03
  of what it would mean to to have made it, which I think for me at
• 44:08
  the time was if I could get into a show in Chicago, Steppenwolf,
• 44:14
  somehow that will be me making it.
• 44:18
  But what I really put my energy into was my own solo performance
• 44:21
  and touring it around to different places.
• 44:24
  And I think the same here that is performing musical improv
• 44:30
  here in Saint Louis. Like making it.
• 44:32
  Well, I don't know. I really don't even know what
• 44:33
  that means anymore other than am I getting energy from the
• 44:38
  creative things that I'm doing? And yes, I am.
• 44:41
  Yeah. Like it's giving me as much as
• 44:44
  I'm giving to it. Yeah, and having like your
• 44:48
  fulfilled personal life and your fulfilled creative life, it
• 44:54
  seems like has really found a good yeah, yes, a constant give
• 45:01
  and take, right? I like, set my creative life
• 45:04
  aside to pursue this relationship and building a
• 45:08
  family and make sure that his career got launched in a way
• 45:12
  that he wanted it to. And then slowly, we were able
• 45:16
  to, like, turn the ship. And and then suddenly more time
• 45:20
  opened up for me to be able to dig into my creative life.
• 45:24
  But there were many, many times where I thought, well, I'm just,
• 45:27
  I won't ever be creative again because now I'm a mom.
• 45:32
  Or now I need to make money and instead still figuring out.
• 45:37
  Well, hang on, I I need this creative piece in order to be a
• 45:40
  healthy, balanced person. So even here in Saint Louis,
• 45:45
  where it doesn't seem like it's a place where I can make it big.
• 45:51
  I can book commercial gigs and voice over stuff and find a
• 45:59
  creative team of people who all want to do this crazy musical
• 46:03
  improv with me. And I'm I keep learning and I
• 46:06
  keep growing and I keep risking and.
• 46:10
  That's super fulfilling. That's.
• 46:13
  Amazing. Well, and I will say I have
• 46:16
  bought products from you that you have like you were the
• 46:21
  person on the like video. Of I forget what exactly the
• 46:26
  products were, but was it an Energizer flashlight?
• 46:33
  No, but I was on Amazon and I was like, oh, was it the baby
• 46:42
  scale? Yes.
• 46:45
  It was the greater goods. Baby scale.
• 46:49
  No. That's what it was, yes.
• 46:51
  And I was like hold. On.
• 46:56
  But like, even just things like that, you're like.
• 47:01
  That's great. Like it was like.
• 47:04
  Whatever. It is surprisingly fun to do
• 47:09
  advertising for people who really believe in their product.
• 47:14
  Or have a unique approach to telling a story about, you know,
• 47:20
  marketing for a flashlight, or marketing for a scale, or
• 47:23
  marketing for whatever. And the fact that I get to go in
• 47:26
  there and I've done some elearning videos, which is
• 47:30
  teleprompter work and I find it. So exciting to be given things
• 47:39
  that maybe I haven't seen and that I have to execute very
• 47:43
  quickly. And the last time this woman
• 47:46
  hired me, she'd hired me twice And she said, do you have a
• 47:49
  background in broadcast journalism?
• 47:51
  And I said no. And she said, how do you know
• 47:53
  how to do this? I.
• 47:54
  Said I. Don't know but I.
• 47:57
  Think it's so fun? So.
• 48:02
  Naturally, I love that. Oh my God.
• 48:08
  I'm. I'm not.
• 48:09
  I am not a singer-songwriter. You are.
• 48:12
  That's not my skill set, right? But if someone put put words in
• 48:18
  front of me and they're like very quickly just read those out
• 48:21
  loud, I there's some fun gymnastics in my head that
• 48:25
  happen that gives me energy and I'm like, oh, OKI can do that.
• 48:31
  Oh man, Anna, I could talk to you for like 500 hours.
• 48:37
  I know you have a lot going on, so I'm just going to ask you one
• 48:41
  of my. The last question I ask
• 48:45
  everybody, As for your life right now, be it the creative
• 48:52
  side, the mom side, both whatever, what has been, what's
• 48:56
  like your lifesaver right now? It could be a mantra.
• 49:01
  It could be a product. It could be.
• 49:04
  I have been training as a yoga teacher and so got my 200 hour
• 49:11
  last year and now working on my 500 hour and my yoga practice as
• 49:19
  well as foray into meditation has really been the lifesaver
• 49:27
  That keeps me from getting like too caught up in like worrying
• 49:30
  about the kids or what what exactly is going on with them or
• 49:33
  are they doing OK? Or worrying about when's the
• 49:36
  next creative project going to come along or how am I going to
• 49:39
  get money for XY or Z? And I think the practice of yoga
• 49:44
  and of being present inside of this body and not trying to
• 49:48
  change it, just be present inside of it, has been truly the
• 49:53
  lifesaver. That helps both when I'm on
• 49:55
  stage or when I'm in a voice over booth or wherever I am.
• 50:00
  To just be present inside of that experience, that's for sure
• 50:05
  a lifesaver. So and you're.
• 50:10
  And you're teaching where? Where are you teaching the yoga?
• 50:14
  I teach yoga at a place here in town called Cherokee St.
• 50:17
  Yoga Collective. So all the classes are give what
• 50:20
  you can so there are no barriers to entry.
• 50:25
  And then I'm pairing yoga and storytelling together in longer
• 50:30
  workshops. So they're three hour workshops,
• 50:33
  starts with yoga, and then we go into storytelling exercises and
• 50:38
  I do that at a place in Webster Groves called Empowered Spaces.
• 50:43
  So yeah, that's that's what I'm building next.
• 50:47
  I just love that you're able to find these connects between
• 50:52
  these different pieces that you feel so strongly about and that.
• 50:59
  Wouldn't necessarily, like, come together in a noncreative mind.
• 51:03
  You wouldn't be like yoga and storytelling.
• 51:06
  But you hearing you say it, it's like, no, that makes sense.
• 51:10
  The like breathwork and yes, I'm sure like emotional
• 51:14
  connectivity. Yes, all of that.
• 51:17
  Yes, aligning your body to be fully present in the moment and
• 51:21
  then see what arises. I think it.
• 51:25
  It all, I would imagine. You know what?
• 51:27
  I'm coming. Home for two weeks in the
• 51:31
  summer. I have a class.
• 51:34
  I would love to take one. I feel like I would just sob in
• 51:37
  one of your classes for some reason.
• 51:39
  I don't know. I feel like your voice would
• 51:41
  just like bring out some emotional crack, and probably in
• 51:48
  the best way possible, I'm sure. Anyway, cracks are always great.
• 51:54
  Like, it's always good to cry. In certain ways, but yes, I
• 52:00
  will. I mean, I will e-mail you
• 52:02
  separately about that. But yes, I would love to see you
• 52:05
  and love that you're coming to Saint Louis in the summer.
• 52:08
  And I'm so excited for you that you're doing this.
• 52:11
  Talk about a creative outlet. I had so many questions that I
• 52:16
  was like, how are people doing anything?
• 52:20
  Help me please. And it's been so great to, like,
• 52:24
  hear everyone's different stories.
• 52:28
  Yeah. And if they tell them in
• 52:31
  different ways, they can go take your classes.
• 52:34
  That's right. Yeah, but I like that you are
• 52:38
  pushing the idea out there that there is no one way to do this.
• 52:42
  No one that has this mom thing down pat, nor auditioning and
• 52:49
  creativity and whatnot. It's just there are 100 million
• 52:53
  ways to do this. And I'm glad you found your such
• 52:59
  a great way. Thanks.
• 53:01
  Thanks. I'm glad you're finding your
• 53:03
  way. Trying.
• 53:05
  We're trying here, man. We're all trying.
• 53:09
  It's so great to see your face. I know.
• 53:11
  You too, my my peeled orange red.
• 53:16
  You look fabulous. And that's our episode.
• 53:22
  Thank you so much to my guest. And a special thank you to my
• 53:27
  producer, Cecilia Trip with Laurel Canyon Creative.
• 53:31
  And thank you to Edith Mudge for our theme music.
• 53:36
  And I hope you enjoyed having a look into Mommywood.
• 53:41
  Don't forget to follow Mommywood podcast on Instagram and TikTok.
• 53:48
  And please give us a nice review and a few stars while you're at
• 53:54
  it. We would appreciate it.
• 53:55
  So, so much and take care.