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How Do I Know What "Enough" Really Is For My Life? · Becoming Financially Confident

• 0:00
  Ralph: Let me ask you something today.
• 0:02
  Does it ever feel like you're always chasing enough, but that finish line just
• 0:08
  keeps moving farther and farther away?
• 0:10
  You get a little more, but then you feel like you just need a little bit more
• 0:14
  and then a little bit more after that.
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  What if I told you true satisfaction isn't found in acquiring those
• 0:22
  endless things, but instead it's found in powerfully defining what
• 0:27
  enough truly is for your life.
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  Well, stick with me today because I'm going to share exactly how to
• 0:33
  find that piece on today's show.
• 0:50
  Hey there.
• 0:51
  Welcome back to your Daily, financially Confident Christian.
• 0:54
  I'm Ralph joining you again today, and it is so great for you to take
• 0:57
  a little time and spend some time here with me, and we continue in
• 1:01
  pursuit of answering that question.
• 1:03
  How do I become a financially confident Christian?
• 1:06
  I. We're in our series Beyond the Budget, finding Financial
• 1:10
  Freedom through Intentional Living.
• 1:12
  This series is all about finding that freedom by living intentionally.
• 1:16
  Now, if you listen yesterday, we tackled the comparison trap.
• 1:19
  If you missed it, I'm gonna encourage you to go check it out.
• 1:21
  Talked about how to stop keeping up with the Joneses in, like I mentioned
• 1:25
  yesterday, the Joneses certainly have a lot of cool stuff, but today we're gonna
• 1:29
  talk about how do I know what that enough?
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  Because that's the key to this.
• 1:34
  How do I know what that enough really is for my life?
• 1:38
  Think about it for a second.
• 1:39
  You reach a goal.
• 1:40
  I've been saving money, I've been wanting to do this, and you buy something
• 1:44
  like, oh, this is gonna be, I talked about this when I bought that watch
• 1:46
  the other day, I reached that goal.
• 1:48
  I saved up to money to buy that watch, and then I bought that watch and I'm
• 1:52
  thinking, oh, this is gonna be great.
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  And after a couple days, I feel completely unsatisfied.
• 2:00
  Why?
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  Because enough keeps shifting.
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  That enough is never enough.
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  'cause then you need more upgrades.
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  You need better versions.
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  And see this endless chase, because that's what it is.
• 2:14
  It's a chase.
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  You're just chasing after enough.
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  It drains your peace and it drains your money and it just
• 2:20
  absolutely drains your finances.
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  And in the end, rather than find enough, you just find stress.
• 2:28
  You find misaligned spending.
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  Unfortunately you find complete discontent and then you just feel like
• 2:34
  your progress is just elusive and joy.
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  Any joy that you get is just a flash in a plane, something just short lived.
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  ' cause here's the thing, you got to understand The world's
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  'enough' is designed by its very nature to be unreachable.
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  That's what it's all about.
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  The world defines enough as something you will never reach because the whole
• 2:55
  point, it's consumerism at its best, that you're never going to get to enough
• 2:59
  because that goalpost keeps moving.
• 3:02
  That's what the world says, The world's enough is designed to be unreachable.
• 3:05
  But here's a beautiful thing today we're gonna talk about, but
• 3:09
  God's definition is clear, and his definition enough is freeing.
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  Let's go to the word.
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  Let's look at one Timothy chapter six, verses six to eight.
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  It says this, but godliness with contentment is great gain having food and
• 3:27
  clothing with these, we shall be content.
• 3:32
  Now listen, I'm not talking about extreme minimalism.
• 3:35
  A lot of people here, they go, oh, well Ralph's talking about minimalism.
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  That's not what I'm saying.
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  Godliness with content is great gain.
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  Hey, do you want great gain?
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  I know I want great gain.
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  And then it ends with these, we shall be content.
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  Because see, it's about recognizing needs versus once I talk about this
• 3:51
  on the show a lot, a lot of financial decision is simply trying to discern
• 3:57
  what's a need and what's a want, because that clarity, that very thing we're
• 4:02
  talking about, that clarity that you get, that's where you find your peace because
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  when you define what your enough looks like, when you recognize what that is.
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  You stop running, you stop chasing that those goalposts don't move
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  anymore because guess what?
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  You're stop.
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  You've stopped running after them.
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  And then you start to really live in stewardship with a purpose
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  and not that societal pressure that so many of us battle.
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  So now you're asking Ralph, what can we do?
• 4:30
  How, how do we even define what our enough looks like?
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  And I'm gonna tell you my solution today.
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  It's not easy, but it's what you need to do.
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  You gotta define your true needs and then filter your once accordingly.
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  I'm not saying you can't live without your once, but you gotta define what
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  your true needs are and then put a filter on those once because this is
• 4:50
  empowering and it makes you make peaceful choices and peaceful, wise decisions.
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  So here's your one action step for today.
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  I want you to start by listing your true needs.
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  Now you might think, Rob, okay, here we go.
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  Rob, I need food, clothing, and shelter.
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  Okay, fine.
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  Maybe that is your basic needs, but I want you to take a minute
• 5:12
  and just write them down.
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  I'm gonna call this your Enough baseline.
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  I'm gonna give you some examples like maybe yours is, I got a
• 5:18
  safe two bedroom apartment.
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  Check the box.
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  I got a place to live.
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  Or maybe weekly grocery budget of $125.
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  Man, I can eat pretty well on that.
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  Maybe your, your baseline is, I got car insurance and gas and I got to
• 5:30
  get to work and I get to church.
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  Fantastic.
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  Maybe you have enough to tie that's important to you.
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  Maybe you have a basic phone plan and you got an internet service.
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  You can say connected to the world.
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  That's a good thing or a bad thing, but that's important to you.
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  Or maybe like a lot of my elderly clients, you got prescription
• 5:48
  medication, you got a good doctor, and you go to your dental checkups.
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  See, to me, those are needs.
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  So that's the first step.
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  Really lay out what your needs are.
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  And yes, they are pretty basic.
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  Food, clothing, shelter, and the things we talked about.
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  But here's the sinister part of this.
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  So many times, and I'm guilty of this just like everybody else, we identify
• 6:12
  our wants and we treat them as needs.
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  And you're like, okay, Rafael lost me on that one and I won.
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  Walk you through this.
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  What do you have to have, because that's the key to this whole
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  thing, and we're gonna talk about some examples here in a second.
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  What do you have to have that's really just a want.
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  Let's talk about this one.
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  A lot of people get stuck in this trap streaming subscriptions.
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  You're, I need downtime, Ralph.
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  Okay, that's fair.
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  That's a reasonable need.
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  You don't need to work every minute of your day.
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  Do you need three platforms for that?
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  Do you need Netflix and Amazon Prime and whatever else is out there?
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  Hulu name 'em all.
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  Yeah, you got a need for downtime, but do you need three platforms to do it?
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  Is that really necessary?
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  Here's one.
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  It's gonna aggravate.
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  A lot of people drive through coffee daily, and everybody's
• 7:02
  said, Ralph, you're always picking on the drive through coffee.
• 7:04
  Well, I don't drink coffee.
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  It's easy for me because you might be saying, I can't start my day without it.
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  Really?
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  I don't think that's food, clothing, or shelter.
• 7:11
  Hey, you gotta argue it's clothing.
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  It's food.
• 7:13
  Yeah, but, but do you really need it?
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  Here's a great one.
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  My listener sent this in.
• 7:18
  Ralph.
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  I need new clothes every season.
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  I got nothing to wear.
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  Really?
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  Are you walking around naked?
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  I don't think so.
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  It sounds to me like that's a want.
• 7:28
  You want new clothes every, you wanna keep up with the fashion trends.
• 7:30
  I get it.
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  But don't disguise that as a need.
• 7:35
  Here's what a lot of our teenagers might say.
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  I need an upgraded phone because my current one is just too slow.
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  Guilty.
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  I do the same thing with my Apple phone every year.
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  Is that a need?
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  Maybe The need is to have a phone.
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  A way to communicate.
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  That's fair.
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  Everybody has one now because we need to communicate.
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  But do you need the latest one?
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  To me, that sounds like a want or about this one.
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  Amazon Essentials.
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  Amazon's done a great job of telling us what is essential.
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  You log into Amazon, oh, look at all the essentials.
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  Oh, it's on sale.
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  I gotta have it.
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  You didn't buy it because it was an essential, they told you it
• 8:10
  was, but was it really essential?
• 8:13
  No.
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  You bought it because it was on sale, but it wasn't essential.
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  So I'm just gonna encourage you right now, write down some of those
• 8:20
  things that are really wants, that you've disguised those as needs.
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  And then if you really wanna break the cycle, this is the
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  secret weapon to the whole thing.
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  You gotta create a filter question.
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  I'm gonna give you some filter questions, and I want you to ask
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  this before every single purchase.
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  It's gonna be tough, but you're gonna have to do this.
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  Ask yourself this.
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  Is this a true need align with my values?
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  We talked about those values the other day.
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  Does it really align with my values, the things that I hold dear?
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  So is it a true need to align with my values or is it a want?
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  Is it a want?
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  Different by comparison?
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  You know what we talked about yesterday, keeping up with the Joneses or that
• 9:00
  societal pressure, or maybe for you, just the impulse feeling, kind of low tired,
• 9:06
  talked about that the other day too.
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  You're out scrolling late at night, you're looking for a relaxation.
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  You're looking for an escape.
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  So ask you that.
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  Is it a true need aligned with my values, or is it really a want?
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  Second question, does this purchase move me towards peace and purpose?
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  Or does it take me away from that?
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  So is this a true need to line my values?
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  And does this purchase move me towards peace and purpose or away from it?
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  Lemme give you an example.
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  Let's say you're shopping, you're standing in the line at Target,
• 9:37
  you're holding a $30 candle, and you got this new throw blanket.
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  You were out wandering the story.
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  You're looking for something to do.
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  Oh, this is a cool, I love the smell of this candle.
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  That throw blanket.
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  That'd be perfect for those, those fall days when I cuddle
• 9:51
  up in front of the fireplace.
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  But now I'm gonna encourage you, ask those two questions.
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  Do I need this to live my values?
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  Or is it You want it because you saw a friend that has it on Instagram?
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  Well, they got that candle.
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  Oh, they got that at Target.
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  Oh, I gotta go get that.
• 10:09
  Oh, oh.
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  I saw my friend Sally.
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  She's got that throw blanket.
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  She had a great picture of that.
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  Her and her husband snuggled up on the couch on Facebook.
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  Then I ask the next logical question, will this make my home more peaceful?
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  Or is it just a momentary distraction?
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  I don't think a candle in a throw blanket is gonna make your house more
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  peaceful, but if you're going into debt to do it, I can guarantee it's
• 10:31
  going to make your life less peaceful.
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  And this is why this helps these things.
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  I don't just pull these outta the sky.
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  They help because they distinguish those needs from once and
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  they distinguish that noise.
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  That noise of, oh, this is a need.
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  This is essential, as Amazon would say, or as social media, do you need this?
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  And if you do this, it's gonna promote peace and it's gonna reinforce
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  the big takeaway from this series.
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  It's gonna reinforce that intentional living.
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  How about we pray together?
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  Father God, we just thank you for providing for all our true needs, all
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  the things we actually need, not our disguised wants, but Lord, our needs.
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  And we often, we confess that, often we confuse those wants and we confuse those
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  needs, Lord, and I just ask that you would help us to define that 'enough'
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  for our lives and help us to live in the contentment that you want us to live in.
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  Grant us wisdom, Lord, grant us clarity and mostly Lord grant us self-control.
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  And let our choices honor you, Lord.
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  And we ask this in confidence.
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  In Jesus' name, Amen.
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  Listen, defining your enough brings peace, not pressure.
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  It's gonna be that thing that breaks that pressure away from you.
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  So list your needs, create a filter, and then choose
• 11:51
  contentment and choose purpose.
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  I'm gonna ask you to do something right now if this show is impacting you.
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  If this particular episode has impacted you, I wanna encourage
• 12:01
  you to share it with somebody.
• 12:03
  There's somebody out there right now that's hurting financially.
• 12:07
  They're stuck in that shame.
• 12:08
  Maybe you've broken free of it and you're using this show to reinforce that.
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  Well, maybe somebody needs to hear today's message.
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  'cause they're stuck in that I don't have enough.
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  I don't know what enough looks like.
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  I'm gonna encourage you to share our show.
• 12:20
  Best thing you can do is text or email them our website that's
• 12:23
  financially confident christian.com.
• 12:26
  I'm also encourage you to pick up a copy of my book.
• 12:29
  It's a free gift for you when you go to financially
• 12:32
  confident christian.com/master.
• 12:35
  I'm gonna give you a free copy of my book.
• 12:36
  It's called Mastering Your Finances.
• 12:38
  It's a quick read, but let me just tell you right now.
• 12:41
  It is truly impactful and it gives you a little bit of a kickstart
• 12:44
  to get in your finances in order.
• 12:46
  Now, tomorrow we're gonna be talking about the superpower of delayed gratification.
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  Yes, I'm telling you right now, delayed gratification.
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  You might think, well, that's restriction.
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  No.
• 12:56
  Let tell you now it's a superpower and you're gonna want to hear
• 12:59
  about what I have to say tomorrow.
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  So encourage you not to miss it.
• 13:02
  Well, let's go out there today and be financially confident.
• 13:06
  Christians, you can do this.
• 13:09
  I truly believe in you.
• 13:11
  Believe in yourself.
• 13:12
  Stay financially savvy.
• 13:13
  God bless you, and you have a great day today.