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Discover How Embracing Vulnerability and Self Care Can Transform Your Motherhood Journey with Catherine Wilde · The Spiritual Parent: Mindful Tools for Raising Spiritual and Conscious Kids

• 0:00
  Catherine: Learning that it's okay to feel all the things.
• 0:02
  Catherine: And that's translated into motherhood, because our kids have all the emotions and they're willing to show them to us.
• 0:07
  Catherine: And how do we show up for them in those moments too?
• 0:10
  Catherine: Right, but allowing myself to be vulnerable, to let those layers down, to really show up as my authentic self as much as I can on this journey, which can look messy at times.
• 0:21
  Catherine: So if you're feeling like, as a mom, you're going one step forward, two steps back at times, it's okay.
• 0:27
  Catherine: It's okay.
• 0:28
  Catherine: That's part of the journey.
• 0:29
  Catherine: It's not going to be this perfect, linear thing.
• 0:32
  Carrie: Yeah, 100%.
• 0:33
  Carrie: What does your self-care look like?
• 0:36
  Carrie: What do you like to do during those times for yourself?
• 0:41
  Catherine: It's evolved over time, like I mentioned, so at first it was okay.
• 0:45
  Catherine: Okay, maybe I just need to pause and place my hand over my heart, take a deep breath, like giving myself a hug.
• 0:51
  Catherine: We all need those hugs, just like our kids come to us for hugs, and I needed a lot of those at the beginning, and still do hi conscious parents.
• 0:59
  Carrie: It's Carrie here and I am here with a little info about raising our mindful kids.
• 1:03
  Carrie: I've got some tips and tricks about breaking free of the box and becoming who you are and teaching your kids how to do that along the way.
• 1:11
  Carrie: Join us, hi conscious moms and dads.
• 1:14
  Carrie: Do you have moments where you miss that flow state that you used to find before becoming a parent?
• 1:20
  Carrie: Was there something that you used to work in that your heart was really passionate about and you felt like you were making a difference in the world?
• 1:27
  Carrie: You can join us with a free guided meditation, available in the show notes, to help you rediscover your passion in life.
• 1:36
  Carrie: Hi there and welcome back.
• 1:40
  Carrie: I have a treat for you guys today.
• 1:41
  Carrie: I'm so excited.
• 1:43
  Carrie: I have my friend that I've been wanting to connect with and we got to connect, and it's Catherine Wild here today.
• 1:50
  Carrie: She's the mom of three, the founder of Soul Care Mom and bestselling author of Reclaiming your Inner Sparkle, which sounds amazing for this year of passion that I'm living at as a mama.
• 2:02
  Carrie: She is a life coach for moms and a yoga and meditation teacher and the creator of the transformational membership Vibrant Mom Life.
• 2:11
  Carrie: Catherine, thank you so much for being here today.
• 2:14
  Carrie: Thank you so much for having me.
• 2:17
  Catherine: I'm so excited for this.
• 2:19
  Carrie: Yeah, I'm so excited to connect with you and I love the title of your book Reclaiming your Inner Sparkle.
• 2:25
  Carrie: How are you drawn to that title?
• 2:30
  Catherine: I think at the beginning of my journey, and maybe even before my motherhood journey, I had lost myself moving through the motions of adulthood and doing the job and taking care of the house and getting married and all of these things.
• 2:44
  Catherine: And then a child comes into the world and it's so beautiful and a dream come true, and at the same time it's overwhelming and I felt like I was drowning, and so, as life went on, I felt like I was just trying to grasp for air and I realized that I didn't really know who I was anymore.
• 3:04
  Catherine: I didn't know what I loved.
• 3:06
  Catherine: I didn't know yeah, what, let me up, what nourished me, and so I began to look for that.
• 3:14
  Catherine: I didn't even know how to take care of myself.
• 3:16
  Catherine: Really, I put myself last so often that I was just miserable, and I didn't want that for my daughter.
• 3:23
  Catherine: I didn't want that.
• 3:24
  Catherine: As our family grew, I wanted to be present with them, and I and I didn't want that for my daughter.
• 3:25
  Catherine: I didn't want that.
• 3:25
  Catherine: As our family grew, I wanted to be present with them, and I and I didn't know how to do that.
• 3:29
  Catherine: And so what I began to do was just pay attention and I was noticing like, oh, I took a moment to just breathe, or I took a moment to have a cup of tea, and that changed how I showed up with my daughter or with my husband, and so I was like, okay, I had this little glimmer of hope, and so I began to do more and more things, and once I started to get the idea of, okay, I can do these little things and they nourish me and they take care of me, and then I started to move to okay, what is it that lights me up again?
• 3:58
  Catherine: What is it that gives me that exciting feeling Because motherhood, of course, is a huge part of it in this season of life, like that is something that I truly enjoy and I want to show up as my best self for that.
• 4:10
  Catherine: But part of me showing up as my best self for that is taking care of myself in all the different, on all the different levels and all the different areas.
• 4:18
  Catherine: Right, so what are the people that light me up, what are the activities that bring me joy, and how can I bring that into my life right now so that I can be the best mom that I can be and also set that example for my kids of how they can, too, keep connected to who they are, keep exploring what lights them up, so that they can bring that into their adulthood too.
• 4:40
  Catherine: Right, when all the shoulds start to settle and all the adulting, how can they stay connected to who they are and really live a life that feels good for them?
• 4:47
  Catherine: I want that for them.
• 4:48
  Carrie: Yes, I love that so much.
• 4:50
  Carrie: That's honestly these pieces of.
• 4:54
  Carrie: I was recently discussing with somebody how, as we're growing up and maturing into adults, we often will put layers of protection upon us, and I've just had this passion for helping our kids stay conscious into adulthood and not have as many layers of protection, and so I love that you're describing that and you're showing your kids how we can take care of ourselves and how we can be mindful for ourselves.
• 5:19
  Carrie: That's beautiful.
• 5:21
  Catherine: Thank you.
• 5:22
  Catherine: And yeah, it's not one of the things that around.
• 5:24
  Catherine: That, too, is letting go of the idea that it has to look perfect, that I have to.
• 5:28
  Catherine: I can never mess up, that I can never have.
• 5:30
  Catherine: Learning about my emotions was a big part of it right, learning that it's okay to feel all the things.
• 5:35
  Catherine: And that's translated into motherhood, because our kids have all the emotions and they're willing to show them to us.
• 5:40
  Catherine: And how do we show up for them in those moments, too right, but allowing myself to be vulnerable, to let those layers down, to really show up as my authentic self as much as I can on this journey, which can look messy at times.
• 5:54
  Catherine: So if you're feeling like, as a mom, you're going one step forward, two steps back at times, it's okay.
• 6:00
  Catherine: It's okay.
• 6:00
  Catherine: That's part of the journey.
• 6:02
  Catherine: It's not going to be this perfect, linear thing.
• 6:05
  Carrie: Yeah, 100%.
• 6:06
  Carrie: What does your self-care look like?
• 6:09
  Carrie: What do you like to do during those times for yourself?
• 6:14
  Catherine: It's evolved over time, like I mentioned, so at first it was okay.
• 6:18
  Catherine: Maybe I just need to pause and place my hand over my heart, take a deep breath, like giving myself a hug.
• 6:24
  Catherine: We all need those hugs, just like our kids come to us for hugs, and I needed a lot of those at the beginning and still do.
• 6:30
  Catherine: My kids are really good about noticing that now too, and they'll come give me a hug.
• 6:33
  Catherine: So, as we start to model these things within ourselves.
• 6:37
  Catherine: Our kids are paying attention.
• 6:39
  Catherine: So that's a beautiful thing.
• 6:41
  Catherine: But deep breaths in those little moments where I start to feel agitated or I start to feel making those little cups of tea and enjoying them, that doing that, just even being present in the moment as I do those things, it could even be just bringing presence into washing the dishes.
• 6:59
  Catherine: Being there in that moment, feeling this like the slippery soap on your hands, the warmth of the water, having gratitude for the dishes that just held, the food that served your family, nourish them, and those sorts of things really bring me back into this moment, take me out of my mind, into my body, which is a big part of what self-care is to me.
• 7:19
  Catherine: But I love to read, I love to be in nature, go for walks.
• 7:22
  Catherine: I love more recently I've been enjoying watercolor it's evolved and just paying attention to those things, those little glimmers that spark my interest.
• 7:33
  Catherine: And can I go over there and play for a little bit and see if it's something that I enjoy?
• 7:37
  Catherine: Listening to music it can be really simple things.
• 7:40
  Catherine: I also love a massage, like a spa day is so nourishing.
• 7:44
  Catherine: But as moms we don't always have those big chunks of time.
• 7:48
  Catherine: So it really is a beautiful thing that we can sprinkle in these moments of self-care throughout our day, right?
• 7:56
  Catherine: And we create this light of self-care when we do that.
• 8:00
  Carrie: Yeah, I love that you're mentioning sprinkling it throughout the day, because it is so hard to get a big chunk of time.
• 8:07
  Carrie: And my husband and I, when we first had kids, we thought we always had to be together Like we're a family.
• 8:13
  Carrie: Now, the three of us we thought we always had to be together Like we're a family, now the three of us we go together, we're spending family time and it's so valuable.
• 8:19
  Carrie: But it got to be almost teeth clenching at times because we didn't realize the self-care piece and we didn't realize that we needed to also re-energize ourselves.
• 8:31
  Carrie: And so we started doing what we call switch time on the weekends, where we give each other one or two hours where the other person takes the kids and we get to choose what we want to do for ourselves, which is really fun.
• 8:44
  Carrie: But I'm married to an Aries, a very strong, powerful Aries that loves to be very productive during his self-care time.
• 8:52
  Carrie: He's building us a mudroom shelf right now out of wood, and so I've had to learn.
• 8:58
  Carrie: Maybe my self-care does not look like his self-care.
• 9:01
  Carrie: Maybe I can have time where I sit and read a fiction book, not even a parenting and not even a intuitive growth or a mindful book.
• 9:10
  Carrie: I can sit and just read a silly fictional book and recharge.
• 9:14
  Carrie: Mom doesn't have to look the same as dad in being productive during our self-care time.
• 9:22
  Carrie: So I love all these things you're doing for yourself.
• 9:25
  Catherine: I love that.
• 9:26
  Catherine: I love that you call it switch time.
• 9:28
  Catherine: For us, that switch time exists as well, and for me, I love taking a bath Like reading is one of my favorite things too, but taking a bath is.
• 9:37
  Catherine: It puts me in this space that I can't do anything else, right, except for relax, and so that's one of my favorites.
• 9:45
  Catherine: I love that.
• 9:46
  Catherine: I resonate with, as well, the beginning of the journey, where we're like we're doing all this stuff and you forget that or I forgot that it was a 24 seven job, like it wasn't.
• 9:58
  Catherine: So you need time off.
• 10:00
  Catherine: It's a time to refill your cup, right?
• 10:04
  Catherine: So, yeah, I love that.
• 10:05
  Catherine: You guys have a beautiful flow, and it's so interesting too to see, even just between moms, like women can have different ways of taking care of themselves, of the things that light them up, and my husband also loves like woodworking and things too, and that brings him joy.
• 10:21
  Catherine: To me that looks like a lot of work, but that's not my thing, but you know it's totally his.
• 10:27
  Carrie: Yeah, I love that we have had some conscious discussions, my husband and I, because he'll have these goals in his mind.
• 10:34
  Carrie: Carrie really wants to have the mudroom done by the start of school and that was the last.
• 10:40
  Carrie: I think it was a year ago, the start of school.
• 10:41
  Carrie: But I said, hon, you're putting the pressure on yourself.
• 10:45
  Carrie: I'm not the one that's ever said that I do not have a deadline.
• 10:49
  Carrie: I want you to do this for you.
• 10:51
  Carrie: I want you to have fun with it.
• 10:54
  Carrie: It needs to be recharging and this is your time away from work.
• 10:58
  Carrie: So please do not have those end goals.
• 11:01
  Carrie: I know you're in Aries, but please just intention into it of recharging yourself and focusing your energy and your mind into what you're doing everywhere online right now, and you can give yourself that time and that space and maybe find an activity or be in the bathtub, so you can't do anything.
• 11:40
  Carrie: You're locked in.
• 11:41
  Carrie: You have to relax.
• 11:42
  Carrie: But also, if you're not using that time intentionally, is that something that you've found for yourself as well?
• 11:49
  Carrie: And we'll be right back after this message.
• 11:52
  Carrie: Hi there, changemaker moms and dads, it's Keri here.
• 11:56
  Carrie: I hope you're enjoying today's episode.
• 11:58
  Carrie: If there's any pieces of this episode that resonate with you, we would love for you to share it with a friend.
• 12:04
  Carrie: A little helping hand goes a long way.
• 12:06
  Carrie: We appreciate you tuning in, and here's more.
• 12:09
  Catherine: Oh, my goodness, you said it so beautifully.
• 12:10
  Catherine: Yes, so when I first started taking time for self-care, my husband would give me time.
• 12:14
  Catherine: I would still come back feeling totally drained, like I wasn't ready to come back into it.
• 12:19
  Catherine: And it could have been that it was the beginning of that journey and I really did need more rejuvenation time, but part of it was that I wasn't nourishing myself in those moments.
• 12:29
  Catherine: I wasn't being present with myself, and one of the.
• 12:34
  Catherine: So self-care you're right, is such a big word right now, but I love to help women to redefine what self-care is, and really it's, if you think about, we spend time with our children, we spend time with our partner, we have friends maybe lifelong friends but the person that we spend the most time with is ourselves.
• 12:52
  Catherine: And so self-care is really this creating this relationship with yourself.
• 12:59
  Catherine: It's becoming your own best friend again, or for the first time, and it can mean looking at how you're speaking to yourself.
• 13:06
  Catherine: You know, sometimes we have a really hard day, or I've had a really hard day and I am still some, somehow, for some reason, berating myself about it in my mind, like it shouldn't have gone this way, I didn't do enough, and so one of those things is how are we speaking to ourselves, right?
• 13:21
  Catherine: How are we being with ourselves?
• 13:23
  Catherine: And I would never speak to a friend that way, right?
• 13:26
  Catherine: If a friend had a hard day, I would want to give her a hug.
• 13:29
  Catherine: I would say it is so okay and you're doing a great job, and so part of my journey with self-care is becoming my own best friend, and when you start to do that, it becomes this really beautiful time to be with yourself, you.
• 13:44
  Catherine: Things come up for you, and sometimes uncomfortable things, like emotions, like we were speaking of before, like being able to sit with these things that are coming up for us.
• 13:53
  Catherine: But it is when we create that time for ourselves, that stillness within ourselves, that we do get to hear, okay, what's going on for you.
• 13:59
  Catherine: And it's also that time where we're we make a lot of decisions as mothers, and it's those times when we create that deep connection with ourselves that we're able to hear the wisdom within us come through.
• 14:14
  Catherine: Right, so the clarity for the next direction we want to go or what might be the next right step for our child, right, if we're struggling with the decision.
• 14:22
  Catherine: And so self-care embodies all of that.
• 14:25
  Catherine: It encompasses so much more than the bath or the spa day.
• 14:30
  Catherine: Right, it is.
• 14:31
  Catherine: It has, yeah, it can go so far if we let it.
• 14:35
  Carrie: Yeah, yeah, and I love that you're also doing this in front of your kids too, do you?
• 14:41
  Carrie: Is there any terms or things that you share with your kids to teach them these pieces as they're growing up?
• 14:47
  Catherine: I have a membership called Vibrant Mom Life and they're a part of it.
• 14:50
  Catherine: They help teach the kids yoga in there and mindfulness exercises like breathing techniques and things, and so they're a really big part of that.
• 15:00
  Catherine: My nine-year-old she wakes up every morning and she comes up with her own yoga pose and she'll show me and we'll do it together and, yeah, they're paying attention and I think, like you were saying, the work that we're having to do to undo when we start with them and we're modeling it for them, there's hopefully less that they'll have to undo and reconnect with themselves.
• 15:21
  Catherine: They are naturally great at this and they're actually teaching me so much as far as when we go outside, they're so in awe of everything we see.
• 15:29
  Catherine: They're like mom, look at this Mom.
• 15:30
  Catherine: Oh, my gosh, this leaf looks like a heart.
• 15:32
  Catherine: There's just so much joy and enthusiasm and curiosity and and that's I've learned so much from them.
• 15:39
  Catherine: And bringing that into my own life and my way of being has really changed how I feel and how I show up in the world.
• 15:46
  Carrie: Yeah, I love that so much.
• 15:48
  Carrie: It's so helpful when we're doing that for our kids and teaching them these long life lessons now and examples for them you were talking about when your kids were first born, I feel I was recently chatting with a friend about.
• 16:04
  Carrie: It's almost like this feeling of this masculine energy when we're first in that survival mode, because it's a big shift for all of us when we first have kids and figuring out like when the sleep is and only surviving on your mom 24, seven, so all of these pieces, it feels like this masculine energy at first and how, with the self care that and the time and the energy that we now have for ourselves, it almost allows me to become more feminine and adapt more of this feminine energy again.
• 16:37
  Carrie: We found that as well.
• 16:39
  Carrie: Oh, my goodness.
• 16:40
  Catherine: Yes.
• 16:41
  Catherine: So before my kids were born, I read all the books.
• 16:44
  Catherine: I wanted to follow all the steps and get it right.
• 16:48
  Catherine: It was a lot, and I and part of what you were saying when you said your family was always together at the beginning.
• 16:55
  Catherine: I think for me part of that was I'm the one that read the books and I want to make sure that this goes right, and so part of me was not able to let that go at the beginning and allow my husband to step into that role and, like you were saying, the masculine and the feminine, we both, we all have both, and so my masculine was really taking over at the beginning and allowing myself to be in more of a being state, be in more of my feminine.
• 17:18
  Catherine: And flow has changed not only the motherhood journey for me but also my relationship with my partner, because it allows him to step into what he's called to step into and we have this really beautiful harmony now.
• 17:33
  Catherine: So, yeah, stepping into your feminine, it can be very stressful when you are over doing one or the other right.
• 17:42
  Catherine: When you're masculine, that is so stressful because it's not, there's not harmony in between the two.
• 17:47
  Catherine: So, finding that balance for you and it can change in different seasons but yeah, finding that balance for you is a really beautiful, a beautiful thing and can be part of your self-care.
• 17:57
  Carrie: Yeah, and also as I've grown into this year of passion for myself and this passion project is what I call Heart to Heart Parents podcast.
• 18:06
  Carrie: A lot is trying to share this, these pieces of helpful tools with raising our conscious kids and keeping them conscious into adults.
• 18:14
  Carrie: I really found a little bit of self-care in it.
• 18:18
  Carrie: There were pieces of my spirit, that as becoming a mom, which is so amazing and it has so many gifts, and it's been lovely and I've enjoyed every minute maybe not, but finding these talents inside of me that I had, and just there's a piece of self-care that comes with this passion project that I've been doing and it's really set free so many pieces that I didn't know Carrie had inside of her and that's been really neat.
• 18:47
  Catherine: Oh, my goodness, I love your podcast and if anybody listening has listened to previous episodes, go listen to them.
• 18:53
  Catherine: And I feel that this, this world, like doing the things that light you up, just being in service, being following those threads because, like we were speaking of before, like I love getting to meet amazing women and that's not something that, through podcasting, through just events like this, that's not something I expected.
• 19:16
  Catherine: I started Soul Care Mom because I realized that I wasn't alone on my journey and I wasn't alone in how I was feeling and how much I was struggling and as I found ways that were nourishing me, I wanted to make sure other moms had access to that too.
• 19:33
  Catherine: But there's been so many beautiful benefits and I love writing, I love connecting with other amazing, incredible souls and it just lights me up so much and I can see that for you too.
• 19:44
  Catherine: So, yeah, follow those threads.
• 19:46
  Catherine: If you're someone that's not sure what it is that lights you up right now, start paying attention.
• 19:53
  Catherine: So maybe you're having a conversation with a friend and she says something about knitting and you are like, ooh, follow that, explore that and see where that takes you.
• 20:01
  Catherine: Just those little glimmers are going to help you reconnect to your sparkle.
• 20:05
  Catherine: So just begin by paying attention and be curious.
• 20:08
  Carrie: Yeah, I love that so much.
• 20:10
  Carrie: I think as we we see what we're drawn to, we start to ignite some of those, maybe rediscover some of those dreams that we had inside of us before we were moms, before we had that role, putting on our other hat for our other role and becoming a little bit of what we were previously.
• 20:28
  Carrie: So that's I love that you're doing that for moms.
• 20:31
  Carrie: That's so wonderful.
• 20:32
  Carrie: Yeah, I wanted to ask you I've been living my year of passion this year If you have anything that you're living out in a passion full that's not a word passionate way in your life with your work.
• 20:49
  Catherine: Oh, yeah, I think my favorite thing is vibrant mom life because it's a place where every month we get to come together and so we explore different themes and so that's always evolving.
• 21:04
  Catherine: That's always based on who's in that space and we kind of collaborate.
• 21:09
  Catherine: There's ideas in there and as I grow I have more to share on different topics and different levels of self-care and nurturing yourself.
• 21:18
  Catherine: And in addition to that, I really love working one-on-one with moms.
• 21:22
  Catherine: So that brings me so much joy because there's this even deeper level of connection when you get to really be with someone for an extended period of time, and so that brings me so much joy and I have a passion and longing for that.
• 21:38
  Catherine: Just in my personal life, I feel like something I keep being called to is this idea of spaciousness.
• 21:45
  Catherine: So when I first started my business, when I first started homeschooling, motherhood even, I was trying to do all of the things and I, over time, I found this pull towards what would it look like if I let some of that go?
• 21:57
  Catherine: What is necessary, what is it?
• 21:58
  Catherine: And playing with that, because the spaciousness around every aspect of my life really nourishes me.
• 22:06
  Catherine: It allows me that space to have clarity, to be more creative.
• 22:09
  Catherine: So I'd say that's something that I'm called to as well right now.
• 22:13
  Carrie: I love it.
• 22:13
  Carrie: That's beautiful.
• 22:14
  Carrie: Those sound like such great spaces to be in and be a part of spaces to be in and be a part of.
• 22:21
  Carrie: Thank you so much, Catherine.
• 22:23
  Carrie: If there's any, oh sorry, I don't mind.
• 22:32
  Carrie: Thank you so much for being here today.
• 22:33
  Carrie: I've had so much wonderful time chatting with you and I would love to do a bath for myself.
• 22:35
  Carrie: That's going to be on my next self-care list.
• 22:37
  Carrie: Thank you for reminding me of that.
• 22:41
  Catherine: Oh, I love that.
• 22:42
  Catherine: Yes, I hope you enjoy your bath and I thank you so much for inviting me to be here.
• 22:47
  Catherine: This was so wonderful and your heart, your, the work that you're doing is so beautiful and it's having this incredible ripple effect on the world, and so, thank you, thank you for all that you do.
• 22:58
  Carrie: Yes, I say same with you.
• 23:00
  Carrie: I love the ripple effect that we're working on and it's amazing.
• 23:03
  Carrie: Thanks so much for connecting Well, that's a wrap.
• 23:06
  Carrie: Thanks so much for tuning in.
• 23:07
  Carrie: Change makers.
• 23:08
  Carrie: This is Carrie, and if you haven't done a review for us five stars and a little few words about what you've enjoyed in our podcast episodes we would really appreciate it.
• 23:18
  Carrie: If you guys would like to ever message me, I would love any questions you have or any feedback at info at heart to heart lifecom, we also have a brand new website which we're super excited to share.
• 23:31
  Carrie: It's heart to heart lifecom.
• 23:34
  Carrie: Thanks so much for tuning in and happy life, happy times.
• 23:37
  Carrie: Changemaker families.