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The Fifth Hour: The Doc and the Lucky Charm · The Ben Maller Show

• 0:00
  Speaker 1: Kaboom if you thought four hours a day 1200 minutes
• 0:05
  Speaker 1: a week was.
• 0:06
  Speaker 2: Enough think again he's the last remnants of the old
• 0:09
  Speaker 2: republic a sole bastion of fairness he treats crackheads in
• 0:13
  Speaker 2: the ghetto gutter the same as the rich pill poppers
• 0:16
  Speaker 2: in the penthouse wow the clearinghouse of hot takes break
• 0:20
  Speaker 2: free for something special the fifth hour with ben mallard
• 0:24
  Speaker 2: starts right now.
• 0:29
  Speaker 1: In the air everywhere. The fifth hour with me, Ben Maller,
• 0:36
  Speaker 1: as we head into the full week four card of
• 0:40
  Speaker 1: the NFL. And we have baseball playoff action. So there's
• 0:44
  Speaker 1: a lot going on right now, and it is a
• 0:47
  Speaker 1: wonderful time to spin the wheel of Malheur Militia Legends,
• 0:52
  Speaker 1: because you know it's Sunday, and so that means we
• 0:54
  Speaker 1: need to figure out who's going to be on. I
• 0:56
  Speaker 1: think you've already gotten a clue who might be on
• 0:58
  Speaker 1: right there. Big money, big money, no whammy, spin the wheel,
• 1:01
  Speaker 1: and stop! And what a motley crew we have. Now,
• 1:06
  Speaker 1: Ohio Al, get me in the mood here, Ohio Al.
• 1:09
  Speaker 1: Get me in the mood.
• 1:10
  Speaker 3: It's in the bag.
• 1:16
  Speaker 1: Ben's Mailbag. All right, Ohio Al, thank you. Now, from
• 1:28
  Speaker 1: the Malheur Wheel of Legends, from the Chicagoland area, a man,
• 1:34
  Speaker 1: a myth, a legend, a guy who's been part of
• 1:35
  Speaker 1: the show for over 20 years, iconic bit after iconic bit,
• 1:40
  Speaker 1: we say hello to the one and only The good doctor,
• 1:44
  Speaker 1: Doc Mike. Hello, Doc Mike.
• 1:47
  Speaker 4: Good afternoon to all your listeners.
• 1:49
  Speaker 5: It's a pleasure and an honor to be up with
• 1:54
  Speaker 5: Big Ben.
• 1:55
  Speaker 1: Yes. Well, good afternoon, good morning, good night, whatever time
• 1:57
  Speaker 1: it is. That's the beauty of this. And you are joined, Doc.
• 2:01
  Speaker 1: From the Commonwealth, a man who I have also met
• 2:04
  Speaker 1: who orchestrated that iconic Mahler meet and greet that we
• 2:08
  Speaker 1: did in Boston. He took the stage in Worcester. He
• 2:12
  Speaker 1: did karaoke nonstop at the Mahler meet and greet we
• 2:16
  Speaker 1: did and then went to the Woo Sox game. We
• 2:19
  Speaker 1: say hello to, there he is, Mike the Leprechaun.
• 2:24
  Speaker 5: Whee!
• 2:28
  Speaker 3: Whee! It's an honor to be on with Doc Mike,
• 2:32
  Speaker 3: and he's a famous goat head man, and he's famous liquid.
• 2:35
  Speaker 1: It's an honor. Yes, he is. Doc is an all-time great.
• 2:39
  Speaker 1: All right, well, gentlemen, let's get going. These are actual
• 2:41
  Speaker 1: letters by actual listeners to the show. We thank everyone
• 2:44
  Speaker 1: who wrote in. You can send a message in for
• 2:47
  Speaker 1: a future episode of The Fifth Hour. You can do
• 2:50
  Speaker 1: that and send it realfifthhour at gmail.com. That's all letters,
• 2:56
  Speaker 1: no numbers. realfifthour at gmail.com. Name and city. I'm getting
• 3:01
  Speaker 1: messages from people that say their name but not their city.
• 3:03
  Speaker 1: Bad job by you, so let's get into it. First
• 3:07
  Speaker 1: up is Gary in Pittsburgh. Now, I happened to meet
• 3:10
  Speaker 1: Gary at the Ohio meet and greet, which was actually
• 3:12
  Speaker 1: in northern Kentucky. We did that a while back, and
• 3:16
  Speaker 1: Gary showed up with these delicious cinnamon rolls. He says, Ben,
• 3:19
  Speaker 1: was Weed Man calling in from an underwater location with
• 3:23
  Speaker 1: a bag of marbles in his mouth? That was a
• 3:26
  Speaker 1: tough listen until he went to beg for food. Then
• 3:31
  Speaker 1: his phone was crystal clear. Gary says, I have a
• 3:34
  Speaker 1: question about how the podcast sausage is made on the
• 3:37
  Speaker 1: overnight show. Is it just me or are some of
• 3:41
  Speaker 1: the hours cut short? A lot of the hour three
• 3:45
  Speaker 1: episodes get lopped off. And those are some of the
• 3:48
  Speaker 1: best bits on the show. Gary says, I didn't hear
• 3:51
  Speaker 1: a single caller on Monday's Maller instant advice line. If
• 3:56
  Speaker 1: I'm the only one that listens to this, is there
• 4:00
  Speaker 1: a setting I can change in the iHeart app? Any
• 4:04
  Speaker 1: help would be appreciated. Finally, I am retired and have
• 4:08
  Speaker 1: plenty of free time if you need. Oh, he wants
• 4:10
  Speaker 1: to be part of the mailbag, too.
• 4:11
  Speaker 3: All right.
• 4:11
  Speaker 1: Well, Gary, we'll add you to the thing. So as
• 4:13
  Speaker 1: far as Weed Man's phone, there's a couple of possibilities.
• 4:16
  Speaker 1: My theory on Weed Man's phone is he's got an
• 4:19
  Speaker 1: Obama phone and it's likely outdated and it's not been updated.
• 4:24
  Speaker 1: And so that's probably why his phone sounded so bad.
• 4:28
  Speaker 1: But Doc Mike is on the phone. We do have
• 4:30
  Speaker 1: a few glitches that we haven't worked out in the
• 4:32
  Speaker 1: remote studio yet. So Doc, for example, is on with us.
• 4:35
  Speaker 5: Right.
• 4:35
  Speaker 1: You can hear me loud and proud, right, Doc? You
• 4:38
  Speaker 1: can hear me.
• 4:39
  Speaker 4: Yeah. All right.
• 4:41
  Speaker 1: But Doc cannot hear. He can't really hear Mike the
• 4:44
  Speaker 1: Leprechaun very well. So there are a few glitches that
• 4:48
  Speaker 1: have attacked. I'm not sure why, because everything is wired. Now,
• 4:52
  Speaker 1: we often record on Zoom. Doc is not on Zoom.
• 4:55
  Speaker 1: I guess I could have put both of you guys
• 4:57
  Speaker 1: on the phone. I could have done that, but that
• 4:59
  Speaker 1: would have been awkward. So I don't know. I don't
• 5:01
  Speaker 1: know if I want to do that. So yeah, in
• 5:03
  Speaker 1: terms of the answer to the question, Gary, I believe
• 5:05
  Speaker 1: it was because of Weed Man's phone. I want to see.
• 5:07
  Speaker 1: But if you guys can't hear Doc Mike this week,
• 5:09
  Speaker 1: let me know. And as far as the podcast sausage,
• 5:12
  Speaker 1: you don't want to know how it's made. You don't
• 5:14
  Speaker 1: really want to know. And I think that's just possibly
• 5:18
  Speaker 1: a laziness issue where people just wanted to end the
• 5:20
  Speaker 1: hour early. I don't know why the whole hour would
• 5:22
  Speaker 1: not be included because it should be completely in there
• 5:26
  Speaker 1: and that's the whole point of selling the podcast i
• 5:28
  Speaker 1: will talk to people and have you had that problem
• 5:31
  Speaker 1: mike the leprechaun you listen live back yes.
• 5:33
  Speaker 3: I do but i have a theory so for one
• 5:36
  Speaker 3: you complain about gremlins and you complain about your technology
• 5:39
  Speaker 3: and the studio and i won't blame lorena obviously but
• 5:45
  Speaker 3: i think you have some gremlins And sometimes the podcast
• 5:50
  Speaker 3: is about 30 minutes of content and other times it's
• 5:53
  Speaker 3: more like 45 minutes of content. So I agree. Yeah.
• 5:56
  Speaker 3: I don't know who makes the sausage, but I'm assuming
• 5:58
  Speaker 3: it's Coop, but I don't know.
• 6:00
  Speaker 2: Yeah.
• 6:00
  Speaker 1: Coop, the person that's answering the calls puts the.
• 6:04
  Speaker 3: Yes, I assume. Yeah.
• 6:05
  Speaker 6: Yeah.
• 6:06
  Speaker 3: And sometimes and sometimes if it's Mark, there's no podcast
• 6:10
  Speaker 3: at all for a day or two.
• 6:12
  Speaker 1: Yeah, I don't understand why that is the way. Every
• 6:15
  Speaker 1: once in a while, there's issues. I bet you, Doc, Mike,
• 6:18
  Speaker 1: you've never even heard a podcast, have.
• 6:20
  Speaker 4: You, Doc? Who had the podcast?
• 6:24
  Speaker 1: You have a flip phone. You don't listen to podcasts
• 6:27
  Speaker 1: is what I'm saying, right?
• 6:30
  Speaker 4: If I do, it's on a computer at the library.
• 6:33
  Speaker 4: I don't even have a computer.
• 6:35
  Speaker 1: All right. Attention advertisers, you can reach this coveted demographic
• 6:39
  Speaker 1: without computers. Well, Gary, thank you for that. I will
• 6:41
  Speaker 1: talk to some people.
• 6:42
  Speaker 3: May I add a comment?
• 6:44
  Speaker 1: Yes, Mike the Leprechaun, yes.
• 6:45
  Speaker 3: My podcast up and coming is called Life at Leprechaun Lodge.
• 6:51
  Speaker 1: I like that. That's good. It's a little long, but
• 6:54
  Speaker 1: that's good. I like it. All right. And you haven't
• 6:56
  Speaker 1: done the podcast yet?
• 6:58
  Speaker 3: My kids just told me they broke the frigging... What?
• 7:03
  Speaker 3: The things you talk into, the microphones, they stepped on them.
• 7:06
  Speaker 1: Oh, no, that's not good.
• 7:08
  Speaker 3: Yes, regardless.
• 7:09
  Speaker 1: All right, Reggie from Detroit writes in. He says, Benny,
• 7:13
  Speaker 1: why didn't NBC bring back Benny versus the Penny? I
• 7:16
  Speaker 1: like it on radio, but I liked it on television
• 7:18
  Speaker 1: as well. Have you seen some of the crappy shows
• 7:21
  Speaker 1: they have on TV? Wow, Reggie. He says, why doesn't
• 7:25
  Speaker 1: Fox One put the Ben Maller show on overnight? It
• 7:28
  Speaker 1: would be great to see you doing the show again.
• 7:30
  Speaker 1: and watch it on TV, and they just have reruns
• 7:33
  Speaker 1: at that time anyway. Or why not put the show
• 7:36
  Speaker 1: on YouTube that's from Reggie in Detroit? Well, I would
• 7:39
  Speaker 1: love if somebody at Fox 1 or any of those
• 7:43
  Speaker 1: channels wants to put the Ben Maller show on, I'd
• 7:45
  Speaker 1: be all about it. Of course, that would come with
• 7:47
  Speaker 1: a check, right? We need a nice check. Or the YouTube.
• 7:51
  Speaker 1: I thought there were some rumblings in the building they
• 7:53
  Speaker 1: were going to put the show on YouTube, some of
• 7:56
  Speaker 1: the daytime shows are on YouTube, but they have not
• 7:58
  Speaker 1: done that. And that requires multiple bodies to go in
• 8:03
  Speaker 1: and set up the live feed and work the cameras.
• 8:06
  Speaker 1: I have enough cameras, Reggie, to do the thing. However,
• 8:10
  Speaker 1: I will tell you, I mean, I want to get
• 8:11
  Speaker 1: a little extra money, right? Is that reasonable? Mike the Leprechaun,
• 8:14
  Speaker 1: if I'm going to be on television, I think I
• 8:16
  Speaker 1: should get a little extra money, right? Wouldn't that be
• 8:18
  Speaker 1: fair to say yes?
• 8:19
  Speaker 3: You have a face for television, even though you're losing money.
• 8:23
  Speaker 3: You're not losing to the penny, but you're losing to yourself.
• 8:26
  Speaker 1: Well, I'm not losing the penny. I'm not yet lost
• 8:30
  Speaker 1: a week. I have a losing record overall. Correct.
• 8:33
  Speaker 3: By minus one, according to Coop. At least Poppy was
• 8:36
  Speaker 3: 2-0 last week.
• 8:38
  Speaker 1: That doesn't count. And you guys just pick your same
• 8:42
  Speaker 1: teams every week. That doesn't count.
• 8:44
  Speaker 3: I follow Papi's lead.
• 8:45
  Speaker 1: Oh, you always pick the Patriots. Now, Doc Mike, you're
• 8:49
  Speaker 1: not a gambler, right, Doc? You don't gamble on things, correct?
• 8:52
  Speaker 4: I'm the world's worst gambler. I tried the stock market.
• 8:56
  Speaker 5: I bought high and wound up every stock I had,
• 8:59
  Speaker 5: I sold low.
• 9:00
  Speaker 4: So I had to stay away from all the gambling.
• 9:03
  Speaker 1: Yeah, I play the stock market, and I generally, with
• 9:07
  Speaker 1: my stock stuff, I buy it, I set it, and
• 9:10
  Speaker 1: I forget it. I just leave the stock there, and
• 9:12
  Speaker 1: I try to forget about it and that kind of stuff.
• 9:14
  Speaker 3: Ben, that is the correct attitude. Yeah. I'm in retirement now.
• 9:19
  Speaker 3: You just let the money sit. Don't panic when Wall Street.
• 9:22
  Speaker 1: Exactly, yeah. My thing is, like, listen, you buy good stock,
• 9:27
  Speaker 1: you do your research, and then just forget about it.
• 9:29
  Speaker 1: And I'll check. I have an app on my phone,
• 9:32
  Speaker 1: so I'll check maybe once a week to see how
• 9:34
  Speaker 1: it's doing. But if it goes down, I'm like, oh,
• 9:36
  Speaker 1: that's fine.
• 9:37
  Speaker 3: Are you an ai are you an ai guy.
• 9:39
  Speaker 1: I play around with it a little bit but i'm
• 9:41
  Speaker 1: not like obsessed with it it's it's a good tool
• 9:44
  Speaker 1: for research for the monologues and things like that scott
• 9:47
  Speaker 1: from northern kentucky writes in on the mailbag yeah met
• 9:50
  Speaker 1: scott he helped put that together he was great boots
• 9:54
  Speaker 1: on the ground there in the cincinnati area scott says
• 9:57
  Speaker 1: ben and the one and only Doc Mike and Mike
• 10:02
  Speaker 1: the Leprechaun. I'm off work for a bit, recovering from surgery.
• 10:05
  Speaker 1: He says, so I figured I'd ask, how many surgeries
• 10:08
  Speaker 1: have you had? He says, until my late 40s, I
• 10:11
  Speaker 1: had only one. But then, wham, meniscus surgery, gallbladder removal,
• 10:17
  Speaker 1: broken humerus in my left arm. I have a plate
• 10:20
  Speaker 1: and 10 screws and a couple others, getting old sucks.
• 10:24
  Speaker 1: There you go. Thanks for helping me get through the
• 10:27
  Speaker 1: recovery time. Scott from Northern Kentucky. Well, this is a
• 10:30
  Speaker 1: good question. So we'll go around Robin here. We'll start
• 10:32
  Speaker 1: with you, Doc Mike. Doc, you're doing great. You're in
• 10:35
  Speaker 1: your 80s now, right? Am I correct on that?
• 10:37
  Speaker 5: Yes?
• 10:38
  Speaker 4: I'll be 82 in January.
• 10:41
  Speaker 1: God love you, Doc. I've known you for many years.
• 10:43
  Speaker 1: You've been great. You look like you're much younger than that.
• 10:47
  Speaker 1: How many surgeries have you had, Doc, when you were younger?
• 10:51
  Speaker 5: Um....
• 10:54
  Speaker 4: Well, from accidents?
• 10:57
  Speaker 1: Yeah.
• 10:58
  Speaker 5: None. But I did have, I was heavy lifting when
• 11:03
  Speaker 5: I was in Ecuador and had a slight hernia.
• 11:07
  Speaker 4: That was a very successful surgery.
• 11:10
  Speaker 5: And last summer I had cataract surgery because.
• 11:14
  Speaker 4: I got too much sunlight.
• 11:16
  Speaker 5: And I'll warn people, be sure to wear your sunglasses
• 11:20
  Speaker 5: when you're out in the sun.
• 11:22
  Speaker 4: And I can see a golf ball now at 250 yards.
• 11:26
  Speaker 5: Nice.
• 11:26
  Speaker 4: Cataract surgery, complete success.
• 11:31
  Speaker 1: You had surgery in Ecuador though, doc?
• 11:34
  Speaker 5: No, I was heavy lifting there, and I had surgery
• 11:38
  Speaker 5: in Chicago.
• 11:38
  Speaker 1: I was going to say, I would rather get back
• 11:40
  Speaker 1: to Chicago to have a surgery than go to Ecuador.
• 11:44
  Speaker 1: Don't you get it, pal? Don't you get it? All right,
• 11:46
  Speaker 1: what about you, Mike the Leprechaun? Any operations, Mike the Leprechaun?
• 11:50
  Speaker 3: Of course, but he should ask Pope Leo for some
• 11:54
  Speaker 3: prayers if he's having an operation abroad. But anyway, yes,
• 11:57
  Speaker 3: I've had my two hips have been resurfaced.
• 12:01
  Speaker 1: Okay, you've had hip replacement.
• 12:03
  Speaker 3: Not replacement, resurface.
• 12:04
  Speaker 1: Oh, resurface. Trim it down a little bit?
• 12:07
  Speaker 3: They trim down the hip joint, yeah. And regardless, I
• 12:11
  Speaker 3: have a question for Doc. How was he heavy lifting
• 12:15
  Speaker 3: in Ecuador?
• 12:16
  Speaker 1: All right, yes. I can answer the question, Doc. You
• 12:19
  Speaker 1: can't really hear him that well. He wants to know
• 12:21
  Speaker 1: why you were doing heavy lifting in Ecuador. No, what?
• 12:25
  Speaker 1: What you were lifting in Ecuador. What were you lifting?
• 12:28
  Speaker 4: I was helping my girlfriend into bed.
• 12:32
  Speaker 3: Oh, my God. That's what I suspected.
• 12:36
  Speaker 5: She was all of about 120 pounds and I was
• 12:39
  Speaker 5: restricted to 110.
• 12:41
  Speaker 1: Oh, look at you, you dirty dog. All right. I
• 12:46
  Speaker 1: have had obviously, Scott, you know, I had my gallbladder
• 12:48
  Speaker 1: taken out. That was many years. It's been a few
• 12:52
  Speaker 1: years since then. I just had a colonoscopy a little
• 12:56
  Speaker 1: while back, so they put me under for that. I've
• 12:58
  Speaker 1: had a few other things when I was younger. I
• 13:01
  Speaker 1: had really bad hearing when I was a kid, so
• 13:05
  Speaker 1: I had tubes put in my ear so I could hear.
• 13:07
  Speaker 1: That was 40-something years ago. It's been It's been a minute,
• 13:13
  Speaker 1: but mostly I've avoided that. Hopefully we don't jinx that.
• 13:16
  Speaker 1: Next up.
• 13:17
  Speaker 3: Dan, can I have a quick joke?
• 13:19
  Speaker 1: Mike the Leprechaun would like to do a dad joke. Yes,
• 13:21
  Speaker 1: Mike the Leprechaun.
• 13:23
  Speaker 3: Have you heard about a website called conjunctivitis.com?
• 13:28
  Speaker 1: I have not.
• 13:29
  Speaker 3: It's a site for sore eyes.
• 13:31
  Speaker 1: Hey, Doc, he just did a dad joke about eyes.
• 13:35
  Speaker 3: Conjunctivitis.
• 13:36
  Speaker 4: I didn't hear it.
• 13:38
  Speaker 1: Doc doesn't seem too upset. He missed it. Just as well. Brian,
• 13:43
  Speaker 1: in your area, Mike the Leprechaun writes in. He says,
• 13:50
  Speaker 1: Benny and special guests, I don't know if you've been
• 13:53
  Speaker 1: keeping up with wild current events, but have you ever
• 13:57
  Speaker 1: heard of the man named Ash Dykes? He says, I
• 14:03
  Speaker 1: wouldn't be surprised if you haven't, but he is a
• 14:05
  Speaker 1: guy who plans on using an inflatable kayak to and
• 14:11
  Speaker 1: going through the Congo Basin. Not only will he be
• 14:14
  Speaker 1: sleeping in the jungle, but as he is paddling down
• 14:17
  Speaker 1: the basin, he will encounter dangerous, venomous snakes in the water,
• 14:22
  Speaker 1: Ryan says, and gorillas and other animals in the jungle.
• 14:26
  Speaker 1: Just wanted your take on it. So many people are
• 14:29
  Speaker 1: freaking out about this. He apparently will already be on
• 14:34
  Speaker 1: his 430-plus mile journey by the time you read this
• 14:37
  Speaker 1: in the mailbag here. on Sunday so Ryan I was
• 14:42
  Speaker 1: not aware of this I.
• 14:43
  Speaker 3: Can tell you more information he's.
• 14:46
  Speaker 1: From Wales he's going to Mongolia and he's going 400
• 14:51
  Speaker 1: miles and let me guess he's live streaming most of
• 14:54
  Speaker 1: this he's recording this for the internet right that's what he's.
• 14:56
  Speaker 3: Doing do they have internet in Madagascar or Mongolia I don't.
• 15:01
  Speaker 1: Know you can get one of those Elon Musk satellite
• 15:03
  Speaker 1: internet things the starlings you can broadcast them anywhere But
• 15:07
  Speaker 1: I'm going to assume he's doing this for the Internet
• 15:09
  Speaker 1: and people do all kinds of wild. I mean, you
• 15:12
  Speaker 1: look at some of that. Wasn't there some kid that
• 15:14
  Speaker 1: was like cutting his hair? I just saw the other
• 15:16
  Speaker 1: day in the middle of the street and he got
• 15:18
  Speaker 1: hit by a car because he was cutting his hair.
• 15:20
  Speaker 1: He was doing it for TikTok.
• 15:21
  Speaker 3: That was Blair from Maine.
• 15:23
  Speaker 1: It sounds like something Blair in Maine would do.
• 15:25
  Speaker 5: Yes.
• 15:26
  Speaker 1: No, I mean, listen, it's it's crazy. It's I watch
• 15:29
  Speaker 1: these shows. Have you seen like Survivor Man and those
• 15:31
  Speaker 1: type of shows? They're entertaining shows. Would I want to
• 15:34
  Speaker 1: go down the Congo Basin? Hell no! Doc, that sounds
• 15:39
  Speaker 1: like something you would do, Doc, in your younger days,
• 15:41
  Speaker 1: going to the Congo on a mission, right? Would you
• 15:44
  Speaker 1: ever been to the Congo, Doc Mike?
• 15:47
  Speaker 5: All I have to do is have a couple of
• 15:49
  Speaker 5: phone numbers for the girls down there.
• 15:50
  Speaker 6: I'll be on the mobile phone.
• 15:56
  Speaker 1: Yes, Mike the Leprechaun.
• 15:57
  Speaker 3: Ben, you should do a Survivor show. You should be
• 16:00
  Speaker 3: the host. For your elite... It's like a verbal octagon.
• 16:06
  Speaker 3: I heard you talk about the verbal octagon.
• 16:08
  Speaker 1: Yeah, people were upset this guy in Ohio was bitching
• 16:10
  Speaker 1: at me because we don't have the octagon. And I said,
• 16:12
  Speaker 1: you and Marcel are like the only real rivalry that
• 16:15
  Speaker 1: we have right now on the show because he calls
• 16:18
  Speaker 1: you Idiot Con.
• 16:19
  Speaker 3: And Leprechaun and Stupid Con.
• 16:21
  Speaker 1: Yeah, and you call him names and then you guys
• 16:23
  Speaker 1: go back and forth and all that. So you're like
• 16:25
  Speaker 1: the only rivalry.
• 16:27
  Speaker 3: Last Monday, I had technical issues and... He was complaining
• 16:31
  Speaker 3: about me, even though I wasn't even on the line.
• 16:34
  Speaker 5: I know.
• 16:34
  Speaker 1: That's the beauty of it.
• 16:36
  Speaker 3: Isn't it? Do you set him up? You set him up,
• 16:39
  Speaker 3: kind of.
• 16:40
  Speaker 1: Oh, I don't set him up. I don't talk to
• 16:42
  Speaker 1: him off the air. I don't talk to him off
• 16:45
  Speaker 1: the air. I swear I don't talk to him off
• 16:47
  Speaker 1: the air. The way you.
• 16:48
  Speaker 3: Lead the callers, you set him up. My God. Okay, whatever.
• 16:52
  Speaker 3: No comment, no comment.
• 16:54
  Speaker 1: No, I've never been to the Congo, Ryan. I do
• 16:56
  Speaker 1: like those type of shows. And, hey, it's Darwinism, unfortunately.
• 17:00
  Speaker 1: You go out and do this stuff, and if something happens,
• 17:03
  Speaker 1: you know, it's the fitting of the herd. Next up,
• 17:06
  Speaker 1: Danny from Parts Unknown. Danny did not write his name,
• 17:11
  Speaker 1: or he wrote his name, but he did not write
• 17:12
  Speaker 1: what city he's from. He says, hey, Ben, did you
• 17:15
  Speaker 1: hear the Joe Rogan podcast? Danny says, no, I did not.
• 17:18
  Speaker 1: He says there was an Air Force veteran that went
• 17:20
  Speaker 1: on there this week. and said there's a secret UFO
• 17:23
  Speaker 1: base spanning multiple city blocks at the bottom of the ocean.
• 17:28
  Speaker 1: That's from Danny. He said, what do you think? You
• 17:31
  Speaker 1: think it's true? Yes! I don't know if that's exactly
• 17:35
  Speaker 1: what's going on, but my theory here, and we'll go
• 17:38
  Speaker 1: around the room, gentlemen, on this mailbag. My theory has
• 17:40
  Speaker 1: always been, well, not always, but in the last, like,
• 17:42
  Speaker 1: 10 years, that there's stuff in the ocean. There's unidentified objects,
• 17:48
  Speaker 1: critters at the bottom of the ocean, and that there's
• 17:52
  Speaker 1: something going on down there, whether it's from outside our
• 17:54
  Speaker 1: world or it's a subspecies that live in the bottom
• 17:57
  Speaker 1: of the ocean. Either way, I believe... What's flying around here,
• 18:01
  Speaker 1: a lot of it comes from the ocean. Mike, the leprechaun,
• 18:04
  Speaker 1: your thoughts here. This guy apparently, according to Danny, claimed
• 18:07
  Speaker 1: on Joe Rogan that he's an Air Force veteran. There's
• 18:10
  Speaker 1: a massive UFO base.
• 18:13
  Speaker 2: Two things.
• 18:14
  Speaker 3: One, I agree. The government has been releasing all these documents.
• 18:19
  Speaker 3: They're either from the sky or the ocean. And the
• 18:21
  Speaker 3: people who live in the ocean are from Atlantis.
• 18:24
  Speaker 5: Oh, oh.
• 18:25
  Speaker 3: There you go. That's my theory. And they're based off of.
• 18:30
  Speaker 3: Puerto Rico.
• 18:31
  Speaker 1: Puerto Rico. Doc Mike, your theory here, A, do you
• 18:34
  Speaker 1: believe in life outside of our world? And B, you've
• 18:39
  Speaker 1: seen a lot, Doc. You've traveled the world. You've gone
• 18:41
  Speaker 1: to Ecuador. You've gone to other countries. Do you believe,
• 18:44
  Speaker 1: Doc Mike, that there is something in the ocean, deep down,
• 18:48
  Speaker 1: there's UFO technology?
• 18:49
  Speaker 4: Definitely.
• 18:50
  Speaker 5: When you look at Angkor Wat, and the pyramids and
• 18:54
  Speaker 5: things like that, there have been other visitors to Earth.
• 18:59
  Speaker 5: And I'm guessing from some of what the pilots have
• 19:03
  Speaker 5: spotted and Navy personnel, there's definitely other.
• 19:09
  Speaker 4: Life forms on this planet.
• 19:12
  Speaker 5: There you go. They're just waiting for us to introduce
• 19:16
  Speaker 5: themselves to us.
• 19:17
  Speaker 1: Yes, Michael Leprechaun.
• 19:18
  Speaker 4: Yes, Mike.
• 19:19
  Speaker 3: A quick follow-up question. Speaking of alien beings... Some of
• 19:24
  Speaker 3: your callers don't call back anymore, like Blind Scott, even
• 19:28
  Speaker 3: Seuss Dog, Darko. And the Black Irishman did come back.
• 19:33
  Speaker 3: I heard that. There's one more. I have a list
• 19:35
  Speaker 3: of people who— oh, I can't say the word list. So anyway,
• 19:38
  Speaker 3: where's Blind Scott? Where's Darko? Where's SpongeBob?
• 19:43
  Speaker 1: I don't know. Some of these guys, what happens is
• 19:46
  Speaker 1: they work during the day, and then they'll work at
• 19:49
  Speaker 1: night for a few months. and then they go back
• 19:50
  Speaker 1: to the day shift. There's that. Some guys get tired.
• 19:54
  Speaker 1: I heard that Dorko, the comedian, was upset because he
• 19:56
  Speaker 1: didn't win a Benny Award, and that was why. He
• 20:00
  Speaker 1: stopped calling. But yeah, he used to be a regular.
• 20:02
  Speaker 1: We haven't heard from Dorco in a while. SpongeBob was
• 20:05
  Speaker 1: never a regular. He'd call up and then disappear. He
• 20:07
  Speaker 1: was funny. Oh, SpongeBob was great, but he'd call up
• 20:10
  Speaker 1: and then disappear for a while. So there's a lot
• 20:12
  Speaker 1: of guys that will just listen to the podcast.
• 20:14
  Speaker 3: Ben, an honest question.
• 20:16
  Speaker 5: Why?
• 20:17
  Speaker 3: Do you wish some days I wouldn't call?
• 20:20
  Speaker 1: No, I'm fine. I can't do that for Lorraine and Coop,
• 20:24
  Speaker 1: but I like you.
• 20:25
  Speaker 3: I gave you a good time in Boston, at least.
• 20:28
  Speaker 1: You did, and you love the show and all that.
• 20:30
  Speaker 1: I love Doc Mike. I wish Doc would call more.
• 20:32
  Speaker 1: Doc's very busy with his clients, right, Doc? You got
• 20:34
  Speaker 1: a lot going on. It's hard for you to get
• 20:37
  Speaker 1: and call up to the show all the time, but
• 20:38
  Speaker 1: you still check in, and I'm happy, Doc. You don't
• 20:41
  Speaker 1: call me every single week like you did for a
• 20:44
  Speaker 1: long time. I'm proud of you. That's a good job
• 20:47
  Speaker 1: by you. Rare and appropriate, that's good.
• 20:50
  Speaker 3: Ben, sorry. Can I get busy?
• 20:54
  Speaker 5: I'm sleeping like a baby from all the help I've done.
• 20:58
  Speaker 4: You got people healed.
• 21:00
  Speaker 5: And it's just from time to time I get a
• 21:04
  Speaker 5: bug and I start calling you.
• 21:06
  Speaker 1: I know. I love it. Yes. Michael Leprechaun, you had
• 21:09
  Speaker 1: something else. Go ahead.
• 21:10
  Speaker 3: Yes, I do love writing off my list, and I
• 21:14
  Speaker 3: do think it's a creative and humorous way for me
• 21:17
  Speaker 3: to just pass the time. Well, you should do that.
• 21:22
  Speaker 1: And Robbie the Mariner fan, who's my normal sidekick on
• 21:25
  Speaker 1: the mailbag, Robbie was starting the Mallertown podcast, but I
• 21:29
  Speaker 1: guess there's already some issues there. But you could do
• 21:31
  Speaker 1: like a postgame thing. You and Poppy could do like
• 21:34
  Speaker 1: a postgame show podcast on the show. That could be
• 21:38
  Speaker 1: an idea that you guys could do together or somebody
• 21:41
  Speaker 1: else other than Poppy. And you could just do like
• 21:43
  Speaker 1: a post game, like what you liked about the show,
• 21:45
  Speaker 1: what you didn't like about the show and that kind
• 21:47
  Speaker 1: of thing.
• 21:48
  Speaker 3: I will add it to my list.
• 21:49
  Speaker 1: Well, you don't have it. It's just a thought.
• 21:51
  Speaker 3: I will add it to my list. Thank you.
• 21:52
  Speaker 1: Quang from Ho Chi Minh, Vietnam writes in Guaranteed Human.
• 21:56
  Speaker 1: He says, Big Ben, did you know urine therapy, the
• 21:59
  Speaker 1: practice of drinking or otherwise using your own urine for
• 22:03
  Speaker 1: supposed health benefits has been around for centuries?
• 22:05
  Speaker 5: Yes.
• 22:06
  Speaker 1: With references to the practice appearing in ancient medical traditions,
• 22:10
  Speaker 1: apparently humanity has spent a very long time looking at
• 22:14
  Speaker 1: something the body was trying to get rid of and thought, wait,
• 22:19
  Speaker 1: maybe we should put that back. And then he says,
• 22:22
  Speaker 1: at what point in medical history did someone look at
• 22:25
  Speaker 1: a cup of urine and say, you know what? I
• 22:28
  Speaker 1: think that might actually be a good food. And more importantly,
• 22:31
  Speaker 1: would Doc Mike ever not recommend it? He says, and
• 22:35
  Speaker 1: is this one treatment that belongs permanently in the do
• 22:38
  Speaker 1: not try this at home file? That's from Quang. Doc,
• 22:41
  Speaker 1: you were very big during the pandemic on urine therapy.
• 22:44
  Speaker 1: We had many conversations. You remember you booked a doctor
• 22:47
  Speaker 1: from Colorado, right? Do you remember that on the show
• 22:50
  Speaker 1: during the show? A, are you still into urine therapy?
• 22:54
  Speaker 1: Do you still practice it? And B, is there any
• 22:58
  Speaker 1: type of issue you would not recommend it for? Doc, Mike,
• 23:01
  Speaker 1: go ahead, Doc.
• 23:03
  Speaker 5: It is recommended for everything from arginine to zinc are
• 23:09
  Speaker 5: the compounds that are in urine. And they, you know,
• 23:13
  Speaker 5: they always say there's no scientific information or studying on it.
• 23:19
  Speaker 4: Well, guess what?
• 23:21
  Speaker 5: In 1975, Miles Laboratory did an exhaustive research project on
• 23:28
  Speaker 5: urine therapy and found.
• 23:30
  Speaker 4: That it was very, very valuable.
• 23:32
  Speaker 5: The reason that the pharmaceutical companies and Rockefellers and the
• 23:36
  Speaker 5: doctors do not want anybody drinking their urine.
• 23:40
  Speaker 4: Is because it's free.
• 23:42
  Speaker 5: That's the F-bomb in the pharmaceutical industry, the word free.
• 23:47
  Speaker 5: I've been doing it. It saved my life in 1965.
• 23:49
  Speaker 5: I've been doing it. And we've got this new thing
• 23:53
  Speaker 5: called ISTO, I-S-T, Immune System Transfer and Overlay. Now, you
• 24:02
  Speaker 5: and me and 8 billion people out there, if that's
• 24:05
  Speaker 5: the current count, plus or minus the illegals. Okay.
• 24:11
  Speaker 4: Every one of us were born.
• 24:12
  Speaker 5: In what they call amniotic fluid, which.
• 24:16
  Speaker 4: Is urine, 90% urine.
• 24:19
  Speaker 5: Now, all of a sudden, when we want to use
• 24:23
  Speaker 5: it as a medicine or a cure for something, oh, no,
• 24:28
  Speaker 5: you get the yuck factor.
• 24:30
  Speaker 4: It's poison. You can get contaminated.
• 24:33
  Speaker 5: Well, that's because it's free and it's extremely valuable.
• 24:38
  Speaker 4: All right.
• 24:40
  Speaker 1: You should do your own.
• 24:41
  Speaker 3: I have a question. I have a comment, Ben.
• 24:42
  Speaker 6: Michael Leprechaun.
• 24:43
  Speaker 1: Mike the Leprechaun would like to comment. Go ahead, Mike
• 24:45
  Speaker 1: the Leprechaun.
• 24:45
  Speaker 3: Okay, so that is terrific medicine and good knowledge of science.
• 24:50
  Speaker 3: A guy called Aaron Ratson got stuck in a cave,
• 24:53
  Speaker 3: a limestone, a sandstone cave in Utah. He was trapped
• 24:56
  Speaker 3: in there. He eventually cut his hand off. The only
• 24:59
  Speaker 3: thing that saved his life was drinking his own urine.
• 25:03
  Speaker 1: There you go. Look at that. It's the way to
• 25:05
  Speaker 1: do it.
• 25:06
  Speaker 3: All right. It's a thing.
• 25:07
  Speaker 1: It's a thing.
• 25:08
  Speaker 3: It's a thing. It's an acquired taste, like Guinness.
• 25:11
  Speaker 1: Okay. Fergdog writes in from that winter wonderland, Fullerton. He says, hi,
• 25:15
  Speaker 1: Ben and Doc Mike. My friend Robbie is a big
• 25:18
  Speaker 1: fan of your medical advice. He's been drinking his own
• 25:20
  Speaker 1: urine before he even knew the health benefits, according to Fergdog.
• 25:25
  Speaker 1: Isn't that nice, Doc Mike? That's kind of nice. You
• 25:28
  Speaker 1: have a message? You want to say hello to Robbie
• 25:29
  Speaker 1: the Mariner fan, Doc Mike?
• 25:31
  Speaker 4: Sure.
• 25:31
  Speaker 1: Well, he's not here. Just say hello. Send him a message.
• 25:36
  Speaker 4: Hello, Robbie.
• 25:38
  Speaker 5: You or your friends are right on track. I've been
• 25:42
  Speaker 5: doing it for the last 25 years. I did it
• 25:44
  Speaker 5: this morning.
• 25:45
  Speaker 4: I'll do it tonight. I'll do it for the rest
• 25:48
  Speaker 4: of my life.
• 25:49
  Speaker 5: Because what it does is bulletproof you against this environment.
• 25:53
  Speaker 4: Your chemtrails, your medications, any nutritional mistakes.
• 25:58
  Speaker 1: All right.
• 25:58
  Speaker 4: I got to be wrecked.
• 25:59
  Speaker 1: Mike, Mike, the leprechaun. When's the last time you drank
• 26:03
  Speaker 1: your own piss?
• 26:04
  Speaker 3: Never, never, ever. But tell Doc, I asked a question.
• 26:09
  Speaker 3: Does he drink it cold? Or hot.
• 26:12
  Speaker 1: All right. Doc, Mike, the leprechaun wants to know, do
• 26:15
  Speaker 1: you drink the urine cold or hot? I think it's
• 26:18
  Speaker 1: warm when it comes out of the body, isn't it?
• 26:20
  Speaker 3: It's quite warm.
• 26:21
  Speaker 5: Maybe 8.6 degrees. It doesn't have to be refrigerated. You
• 26:25
  Speaker 5: can age it. It's even more valuable aging it.
• 26:30
  Speaker 3: Like a fine wine. A fine wine.
• 26:32
  Speaker 1: A fine urine.
• 26:34
  Speaker 3: I see the joke. A fine urine.
• 26:36
  Speaker 1: And it's your own proprietary blend. All right. Let's see.
• 26:40
  Speaker 1: What else do we have here? A fur dog says blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. Ben,
• 26:44
  Speaker 1: you made a good point about the goat debate recently.
• 26:48
  Speaker 1: When people think of a goat, they don't think of winter.
• 26:50
  Speaker 1: They think of a smelly animal covered in flies. So
• 26:53
  Speaker 1: let's settle who the real goats are in sports. Basketball
• 26:58
  Speaker 1: goat isn't Jordan or LaFlop. It's Paul Pierce who soiled himself.
• 27:03
  Speaker 1: During the 08 NBA Finals and had to be carried
• 27:05
  Speaker 1: off the court to the bathroom. In the NFL, it
• 27:09
  Speaker 1: has to be former Buffalo Bills center Mitch Morse who
• 27:12
  Speaker 1: admitted to pooping his pants during game. I was considering
• 27:16
  Speaker 1: Jason Kelsey who said he once had a shart accident.
• 27:20
  Speaker 1: On his studio or stupid podcast, but it happened in
• 27:23
  Speaker 1: warmups and not the actual game. So it's not quite
• 27:27
  Speaker 1: good enough. He says there's a couple of good options
• 27:30
  Speaker 1: for baseball like Kike Hernandez and Archie Bradley, but I'm
• 27:35
  Speaker 1: going to go with Chanho Fart. who blamed his struggles
• 27:39
  Speaker 1: on the mound one day to do a battle with diarrhea,
• 27:42
  Speaker 1: he says. And for hockey, there's no debate. It's Ben Bishop.
• 27:46
  Speaker 1: We all know he crapped his pants during a game.
• 27:48
  Speaker 1: Eddie Garcia knows it, too. What do you think of
• 27:51
  Speaker 1: my goats, Ben? Feel free to disagree. No, no, I
• 27:54
  Speaker 1: like that, Ferg Dog. That's the poopy goats right there.
• 27:56
  Speaker 1: You have Ben Bishop. Die, die, diarrhea! That was hilarious.
• 28:00
  Speaker 1: Eddie got so upset when I said he had diarrhea.
• 28:03
  Speaker 1: He got very upset with me. There are actually a
• 28:05
  Speaker 1: lot of guys. I remember I worked with Lincoln Kennedy,
• 28:08
  Speaker 1: who played NFL– line with the Raiders all those years.
• 28:13
  Speaker 1: And Lincoln would tell stories. I've worked with some other
• 28:15
  Speaker 1: people who would say similar things. Like, a lot of
• 28:17
  Speaker 1: these guys will just poop their, you know, they poop
• 28:19
  Speaker 1: their pants because it works two ways because guys don't
• 28:23
  Speaker 1: really want to touch them if they're covered in poo-poo
• 28:25
  Speaker 1: and all that. The Paul Pierce thing is all time, right?
• 28:29
  Speaker 1: I mean, he took a wheelchair, Mike the Leprechaun, because
• 28:32
  Speaker 1: he pooped his pants. A wheelchair for poopy pants. How amazing.
• 28:37
  Speaker 3: My top four, Jordan... Brady, Gretzky, and the Bambino.
• 28:44
  Speaker 1: I don't think you got the question. All right, next up,
• 28:46
  Speaker 1: Alf writes in from the Truth in Broadcasting wing of
• 28:51
  Speaker 1: the MBI, the Malheur Bureau of Investigations. He says, happy
• 28:55
  Speaker 1: National Taco Day, Ben, and esteemed guest. That would be
• 28:58
  Speaker 1: Doc Mike from the Windy City. And we've got the
• 29:02
  Speaker 1: Commonwealth man not that far away from where the Woo
• 29:04
  Speaker 1: Sox used to play. It's the offseason now, Mike the Leprechaun.
• 29:08
  Speaker 1: He says, who would have thought way back. that when
• 29:12
  Speaker 1: I signed up for Malheur Plus, Alf writes in, that
• 29:16
  Speaker 1: it would be such a beneficial companion for the everyday
• 29:20
  Speaker 1: task in life. Since signing up, I have also been
• 29:25
  Speaker 1: deputized as an agent in the MBI, the Malheur Bureau
• 29:28
  Speaker 1: of Investigations. Like you say, Ben, we must first look
• 29:31
  Speaker 1: back and then we can look forward. So let us
• 29:34
  Speaker 1: go back to that fateful night when Patty Speaks had
• 29:38
  Speaker 1: the most prestigious honor of flipping the world-famous penny. Up first,
• 29:42
  Speaker 1: the Patriots and the Jaguars, using my fine-tuned listening skills,
• 29:47
  Speaker 1: I heard Patty say that the penny picks the path
• 29:50
  Speaker 1: that's ahead. And I think to myself, wait a minute,
• 29:53
  Speaker 1: the Patriots are on the road, and the road team
• 29:56
  Speaker 1: is tails because they sit on their tails to travel.
• 30:00
  Speaker 1: I have since reviewed the transcript and also the game tape.
• 30:04
  Speaker 1: Thanks for my aforementioned Mallard Plus subscription and have flipped
• 30:09
  Speaker 1: all of the Penny's picks. And Penny had, in fact,
• 30:12
  Speaker 1: a 6-2 record on that night in question. Case closed.
• 30:18
  Speaker 1: Suck it, Ben. Fair and balanced. Team Robby. Well, Alf,
• 30:24
  Speaker 1: here's the problem. Now, you're right. Patty Speaks had no
• 30:27
  Speaker 1: idea what he was doing. That's because Coop bailed out
• 30:29
  Speaker 1: at the last minute, and he came in there to
• 30:32
  Speaker 1: fill in. That was the night I think we had
• 30:34
  Speaker 1: two different people fill in because– I couldn't stay the
• 30:37
  Speaker 1: whole show. So in the middle of the show, we
• 30:39
  Speaker 1: switched or like an hour into the show, we switch,
• 30:41
  Speaker 1: which is not ideal. Not ideal. Uh, anyway, uh, Patty
• 30:44
  Speaker 1: had no, no clue what he was doing. I love him,
• 30:46
  Speaker 1: but he had no clue what he's doing.
• 30:47
  Speaker 3: So he, I like Patty too.
• 30:49
  Speaker 1: He's a nice guy. He's a very nice guy, but he,
• 30:51
  Speaker 1: he didn't know what he's doing. So he flipped the thing.
• 30:53
  Speaker 1: And then he, we went by the pics he wrote down.
• 30:56
  Speaker 1: He wrote down the picks on a paper, and that's
• 31:01
  Speaker 1: the official. He wrote down, and you didn't have access
• 31:03
  Speaker 1: to this, Alf. That's what he wrote down. Anyway, moving on.
• 31:07
  Speaker 1: Rick in Edmonton writes in. He says, hey, Ben, you
• 31:09
  Speaker 1: got to get Eddie back on the podcast to see
• 31:11
  Speaker 1: if he approves the romance novel-inspired short stories the NHL
• 31:16
  Speaker 1: is using to promote the upcoming or the current season,
• 31:18
  Speaker 1: he says. He says there's a new campaign called Hot
• 31:22
  Speaker 1: for Hockey. The NHL rolling out romance novel-inspired short stories
• 31:28
  Speaker 1: starring the league's players on audiobook platforms. And so then
• 31:34
  Speaker 1: he named some of the players here. Sebastian Ajo. We've
• 31:37
  Speaker 1: got Jack Eichel, among the others. They resemble. I guess
• 31:42
  Speaker 1: the players aren't having romance here. It's just back cover summaries.
• 31:46
  Speaker 1: Not really romance novels, but it looks like a romance novel.
• 31:49
  Speaker 1: All right. I don't know what you want me to do.
• 31:51
  Speaker 1: Eddie's not here. I think it's stupid, but whatever. I'd
• 31:55
  Speaker 1: love to know the pitch meeting. Wouldn't that be fun,
• 31:58
  Speaker 1: Doc Mike, to find out somebody came in and spoke
• 32:00
  Speaker 1: to the NHL and they said, hey, here's a good idea.
• 32:03
  Speaker 1: Let's do an online romance novel inspired short story thing. Okay,
• 32:08
  Speaker 1: that seems like fun. And then they had to sign
• 32:11
  Speaker 1: off on it. Doesn't that seem wild to Doc? I mean,
• 32:14
  Speaker 1: come on now, right, Doc Mike?
• 32:17
  Speaker 4: I got a lot of romaine stories if you want.
• 32:20
  Speaker 1: I bet you do you dirty dog there and by
• 32:23
  Speaker 1: the way doc yeah you're middle-aged right now dog aren't
• 32:25
  Speaker 1: you planning to live to be like 160 or something
• 32:27
  Speaker 1: like that right come.
• 32:29
  Speaker 6: On easy easy yeah yeah you got many here's what
• 32:34
  Speaker 6: it is ben is reducing what they call oxidative stress
• 32:38
  Speaker 6: every doctor is told about this in medical school but.
• 32:45
  Speaker 5: It's a lifestyle, stress reduction, emotional stress. You've got 11
• 32:50
  Speaker 5: different stressors, you know, financial, religious, mechanical.
• 32:53
  Speaker 4: Blah, blah, blah.
• 32:54
  Speaker 5: When you organize all those, get them running in the
• 32:57
  Speaker 5: right direction, your oxygen levels soar. And that is the
• 33:03
  Speaker 5: way your pH, your potential hydrogen, your acidity, and your
• 33:07
  Speaker 5: alkalinity in your body balance and you can i mean
• 33:13
  Speaker 5: look at methuselah lived 900 years okay and these other
• 33:18
  Speaker 5: uh princes and kings and so on hundreds of years
• 33:22
  Speaker 5: this was because they weren't contaminated as we are now
• 33:25
  Speaker 5: it's your trail of chemicals.
• 33:28
  Speaker 1: I got you i got you all right There's Mike
• 33:31
  Speaker 1: to the left. Okay, stop.
• 33:32
  Speaker 3: Okay, anyway, Doc is an incredible— I didn't know he had
• 33:36
  Speaker 3: so much knowledge about— I mean, Ben, most of your calls
• 33:40
  Speaker 3: are two minutes, three minutes.
• 33:41
  Speaker 2: Yes.
• 33:41
  Speaker 3: Doc is a very knowledgeable gentleman. I will make a
• 33:46
  Speaker 3: quick comment that, unfortunately, modern medicine is bringing people down
• 33:51
  Speaker 3: the road of addiction.
• 33:53
  Speaker 1: And there's a lot of people addicted, right?
• 33:56
  Speaker 3: Addicted to your show.
• 33:58
  Speaker 1: Oh, addicted to your show. Yeah. You've talked about the addiction. Eddie,
• 34:01
  Speaker 1: different Eddie. This is Eddie from the Bay writes in. Actually,
• 34:04
  Speaker 1: nobody else. I think the other guy wanted me to
• 34:05
  Speaker 1: talk to Eddie. Eddie from the Bay writes in. He says, Ben,
• 34:08
  Speaker 1: do you feel bad for the 49ers owner Jed York?
• 34:11
  Speaker 1: I know you weren't on that night, but he was
• 34:13
  Speaker 1: suspended for six games and fined $ 500, 000. Because he violated
• 34:18
  Speaker 1: the NFL's personal conduct policy. Yes, I would like to
• 34:21
  Speaker 1: address this. I might talk about this tonight when I
• 34:23
  Speaker 1: get back behind the radio microphones. I probably will not
• 34:26
  Speaker 1: have time because we got a full card of NFL
• 34:28
  Speaker 1: games to break down. So I generally don't have time
• 34:31
  Speaker 1: to do anything other than that and the baseball. I
• 34:33
  Speaker 1: will tell you, though, Eddie from the Bay, you can't
• 34:37
  Speaker 1: suspend an owner. It's one of the dumbest things. What
• 34:40
  Speaker 1: are you suspending the owner from? Owning the team? He
• 34:44
  Speaker 1: still owns it. It's ridiculous. The NFL really hammered Jed York. Hey, Jed,
• 34:50
  Speaker 1: go home to your mansion and think about what you did, Jed. Yes,
• 34:55
  Speaker 1: and think about it while you're laying on a floaty
• 34:58
  Speaker 1: in your infinity pool while somebody feeds you strawberries covered
• 35:02
  Speaker 1: in chocolate. So he's banned from the stadium for the
• 35:05
  Speaker 1: Niners next six games. So he's going to watch on
• 35:08
  Speaker 1: television a TV the size of like a Walgreens, and
• 35:13
  Speaker 1: he's sentenced to six weeks of house arrest with servants,
• 35:17
  Speaker 1: a chef, a wine cellar. He's getting punished like a
• 35:20
  Speaker 1: Disney prince. And I'll tell you what, I would like
• 35:23
  Speaker 1: to be sentenced to his house also. Give me six
• 35:26
  Speaker 1: weeks in his mansion. I don't have to leave. I
• 35:30
  Speaker 1: don't care. I'll take a weekend. It is stupid.
• 35:34
  Speaker 3: Public shame, Ben. Public shame is worse than anything he
• 35:38
  Speaker 3: has to endure with the six weeks and the half million.
• 35:40
  Speaker 3: All right.
• 35:41
  Speaker 1: I got you. Kevin from Seattle writes in. He says, Ben,
• 35:44
  Speaker 1: what does your crystal ball say about the future of
• 35:47
  Speaker 1: Jimmy Kimmel? He says, I saw the president of Disney
• 35:51
  Speaker 1: said it's very challenging the day part after she was
• 35:54
  Speaker 1: asked about the future of Jimmy Kimmel live on TV.
• 35:59
  Speaker 1: So instead of, Kevin, instead of using my distant, you know,
• 36:04
  Speaker 1: my powers as a distant relative of Nostradamus, friend of Nostradamus,
• 36:08
  Speaker 1: I will use the Magic 8-Ball. And I'm going to
• 36:11
  Speaker 1: shake the Magic 8-Ball. I'm shaking it right now. And
• 36:14
  Speaker 1: the Magic 8-Ball, I say, oh, Magic 8-Ball, what does
• 36:17
  Speaker 1: the future look like for ABC's Jimmy Kimmel Live? And
• 36:21
  Speaker 1: the Magic 8-Ball says, outlook not so good.
• 36:25
  Speaker 5: Yeah.
• 36:27
  Speaker 1: Here's the problem. It's a lot of money to do
• 36:29
  Speaker 1: those shows. The shows are not very good. They're just crappy,
• 36:33
  Speaker 1: most of them. And the audience isn't there. If they
• 36:37
  Speaker 1: could do the show with fewer people, you don't need
• 36:39
  Speaker 1: 150 people. You shouldn't need 150 people to do a
• 36:43
  Speaker 1: show like that. They do. And they don't want to
• 36:47
  Speaker 1: pay all those people. And plus, you're really only appealing
• 36:50
  Speaker 1: to half the country. And Jimmy Kimmel's pretty open about that.
• 36:54
  Speaker 1: He didn't care about conservatives he's concerned worried about liberals
• 36:57
  Speaker 1: and all that but i i haven't watched i actually
• 37:00
  Speaker 1: work at night during the week so i i'm not
• 37:02
  Speaker 1: the right person to ask but i i grew up
• 37:04
  Speaker 1: on late night tv uh david letterman johnny carson uh
• 37:07
  Speaker 1: those kind of things but i i just think it's
• 37:10
  Speaker 1: not a thing because people they're not consuming it as
• 37:13
  Speaker 1: much doc mike when's the last time you watched late
• 37:16
  Speaker 1: night tv doc mike.
• 37:19
  Speaker 5: I haven't had a television for 40 years.
• 37:21
  Speaker 1: And i'm All right, 40 years. That's a good show.
• 37:25
  Speaker 1: Two generations. Mike the Leprechaun, last time you watched late
• 37:28
  Speaker 1: night TV.
• 37:29
  Speaker 3: Last night I watched Jimmy Fallon. Oh, all right. So
• 37:33
  Speaker 3: last night your friend was in Brooklyn. I didn't see
• 37:36
  Speaker 3: Marcel in the audience, and it does cost too much.
• 37:40
  Speaker 2: Yes.
• 37:41
  Speaker 3: He had a fantastic audience last night. He had Paul McCartney.
• 37:45
  Speaker 3: It was really funny. He's actually pretty funny.
• 37:48
  Speaker 1: All right. But I agree.
• 37:50
  Speaker 3: Anyway, he won't. It's a dinosaur. These things are going
• 37:54
  Speaker 3: to die away.
• 37:55
  Speaker 1: Yeah, they are. Joe from New York writes in. He says,
• 37:59
  Speaker 1: Benny Radio, I know you don't like our mayor. However,
• 38:02
  Speaker 1: do you like this new rule? And he says, in
• 38:04
  Speaker 1: New York City now, there's a click-to-cancel rule that takes effect,
• 38:08
  Speaker 1: making a subscription cancellation as easy as it was to
• 38:12
  Speaker 1: sign up for something. Well, I don't know much about this, Joe.
• 38:15
  Speaker 1: From what you've said, if this is accurate, I like it.
• 38:19
  Speaker 1: I'm on board because it should be easier. They always
• 38:22
  Speaker 1: get you where you sign up for these things and
• 38:26
  Speaker 1: then it's like you're stuck in a corn maze. If
• 38:28
  Speaker 1: you try to get out of it, you can't get
• 38:30
  Speaker 1: out of it. You should make it easy. And I
• 38:33
  Speaker 1: know why they don't do it because they want you
• 38:34
  Speaker 1: to have to go on the call tree and send
• 38:37
  Speaker 1: 17 emails and all this stuff. So I totally get why...
• 38:43
  Speaker 1: They have that situation, I understand, but it should be
• 38:47
  Speaker 1: like this. What you described, Joe, is outstanding. What else
• 38:53
  Speaker 1: do we have here? Blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. Well,
• 38:59
  Speaker 1: thank you, Doc. Mike, I appreciate that. We're going a
• 39:02
  Speaker 1: little long here. It's only supposed to be 30 minutes.
• 39:04
  Speaker 1: We've gone over. We've gone past the 30 minute threshold.
• 39:08
  Speaker 1: And here we go. Scientists have debunked a wacky. This
• 39:12
  Speaker 1: is from from a person did not sign their name.
• 39:16
  Speaker 1: They just wrote their email. So I don't know who
• 39:19
  Speaker 1: the hell this is from or where they're from. But
• 39:21
  Speaker 1: they sent this and they said, hey, Ben, your thoughts
• 39:23
  Speaker 1: on the science community debunking a 1960 study claiming that doomsday.
• 39:30
  Speaker 1: is going to occur on November 13th of this year.
• 39:34
  Speaker 1: That will be doomsday. And then are you worried about
• 39:38
  Speaker 1: your doomsday prophecies?
• 39:39
  Speaker 3: No.
• 39:41
  Speaker 1: I'm not. Are you guys worried about November 13th? Anybody
• 39:44
  Speaker 1: worried about that date, November 13th? I am not.
• 39:46
  Speaker 5: I'm not.
• 39:47
  Speaker 3: I'm worried about October 30th.
• 39:48
  Speaker 5: I'm not. There's billions and billions of tons of water
• 39:54
  Speaker 5: and concrete and blacktop and gasoline. Look at the stadiums
• 40:00
  Speaker 5: that are being built by these billionaires.
• 40:04
  Speaker 3: They know we're going to be around.
• 40:06
  Speaker 5: We're not going anyplace because of these goofballs in Washington.
• 40:10
  Speaker 1: I got you. Here's... I don't know. I got a
• 40:15
  Speaker 1: lot here. Jay from Chattanooga says, we're very proud of
• 40:18
  Speaker 1: our legend, Dolly. Did you listen to Jolene on Spotify?
• 40:22
  Speaker 1: He says, Dolly Parton's Jolene became the 20th country song
• 40:26
  Speaker 1: in history to surpass 1 billion streams on Spotify. Well,
• 40:29
  Speaker 1: good for the memory of Dolly Parton. No, I did
• 40:31
  Speaker 1: not listen to Jolene on Spotify, but thank you, Jay,
• 40:34
  Speaker 1: for that.
• 40:34
  Speaker 3: We just had 9 to 4. 9, 24. Working. 9
• 40:39
  Speaker 3: to 4.
• 40:39
  Speaker 1: Oh, I see what you did there. I see what you... Mm-hmm.
• 40:42
  Speaker 5: All right.
• 40:43
  Speaker 1: You got that awful. That's a dad joke.
• 40:45
  Speaker 3: Jolene, Jolene.
• 40:47
  Speaker 5: That was one of my favorites.
• 40:49
  Speaker 1: The Dolly part was wonderful. All right, we'll close it
• 40:51
  Speaker 1: right here. Any final thought? We'll start with you, Doc Mike.
• 40:54
  Speaker 1: Any final thought here on the mailbag? We thank you
• 40:56
  Speaker 1: for spending some time here on the weekend with us, Doc.
• 40:59
  Speaker 1: Any final thought you want to give out to the people?
• 41:02
  Speaker 5: I just want to thank all the militia and your spinoffs,
• 41:06
  Speaker 5: this investigation thing and so on. There's these loyal listeners
• 41:10
  Speaker 5: to your show. And wish you good health and wellness
• 41:17
  Speaker 5: for the rest of your life, pal.
• 41:18
  Speaker 1: You too, Doc Mike. And hopefully we'll get together again
• 41:21
  Speaker 1: at some point at one of these Maller meet and
• 41:23
  Speaker 1: greets in the Midwest. I'll let you know. And Mike
• 41:26
  Speaker 1: the Leprechaun, any final thought here? Mike the Leprechaun from
• 41:28
  Speaker 1: the Commonwealth.
• 41:30
  Speaker 3: NBC, no Boston championship for the Red Sox, and Drake
• 41:35
  Speaker 3: May needs to get a life.
• 41:38
  Speaker 1: He needs to get a— well, he has a life. That
• 41:40
  Speaker 1: might be the problem.
• 41:41
  Speaker 3: He has a wife, but he doesn't have a life
• 41:42
  Speaker 3: in the football field.
• 41:44
  Speaker 1: Lately, he has not.
• 41:45
  Speaker 3: Ohio State is winning, by the way.
• 41:46
  Speaker 1: We'll see how he does against the— We'll see how
• 41:49
  Speaker 1: he does against the bills.
• 41:51
  Speaker 5: Anyway.
• 41:51
  Speaker 2: All right.
• 41:51
  Speaker 1: Have a great rest of your Sunday. I'll be back
• 41:55
  Speaker 1: full week. No scheduled days off this week. So I
• 41:57
  Speaker 1: will be in all night tonight. And then every night
• 42:00
  Speaker 1: during the week, on the Ben Maler Show on Fox
• 42:03
  Speaker 1: Sports Radio, the iHeartRadio app, the live feed, the Ben
• 42:05
  Speaker 1: Maler Show podcast. Thank you. If you want to be
• 42:08
  Speaker 1: part of the mailbag in the future, realfifthour at gmail.com.
• 42:11
  Speaker 1: If you want to be a sidekick like Mike the
• 42:13
  Speaker 1: Leprechaun and Doc Mike in Chicago, mention that. Give your number,
• 42:18
  Speaker 1: contact information when you're available. And if it lines up
• 42:22
  Speaker 1: with me, we still have to get Big Daddy on here.
• 42:25
  Speaker 1: Who else do we have to get? Poppy wants to
• 42:27
  Speaker 1: be part of this mailbag. We've got to get Poppy
• 42:29
  Speaker 1: on here. And a few other people have reached out saying,
• 42:33
  Speaker 1: Gary in Pittsburgh, you just read that earlier. So we'll
• 42:36
  Speaker 1: make that happen. Have a wonderful rest of your Sunday,
• 42:41
  Speaker 1: and we will chat with you next time. Bye-bye.