Latest / The World Knowledge / The Importance of Staying Hopeful

Transcript

The Importance of Staying Hopeful · The World Knowledge

• 0:00
  Speaker 1: Well, good evening, listeners. Thank you so much for coming
• 0:03
  Speaker 1: on and taking time to listen to Lamenta Vogue podcast,
• 0:07
  Speaker 1: another episode for you. And today, it's a special one
• 0:12
  Speaker 1: for me because my mom, she was a mom in
• 0:17
  Speaker 1: her late 30s, early 40s because she struggled with infertility.
• 0:21
  Speaker 1: So it took her 12 years to have me. And
• 0:24
  Speaker 1: then shortly after me, she had my sister.
• 0:27
  Speaker 2: We just got to go. We just have to hit
• 0:30
  Speaker 2: post and see what happens.
• 0:33
  Speaker 1: Well, and I think the one that... I don't know
• 0:36
  Speaker 1: if this is the one I stumbled on, but it
• 0:38
  Speaker 1: was your post about the Disney piece that was done
• 0:43
  Speaker 1: and that you said was really impactful. And then that
• 0:45
  Speaker 1: ended up going viral for you, which was pretty cool.
• 0:49
  Speaker 2: Yes. That one actually started off a lot of... It
• 0:56
  Speaker 2: changed a lot for me because there was actually a
• 0:58
  Speaker 2: ton of negative comments on that. I don't know. It's
• 1:03
  Speaker 2: still on my page, but I unpinned it. It did
• 1:07
  Speaker 2: go a little bit viral and it got a ton
• 1:09
  Speaker 2: of hate. And it was from people that just didn't
• 1:11
  Speaker 2: really understand what infertility is and what it can do.
• 1:16
  Speaker 2: My husband and I use Disneyland as kind of like
• 1:18
  Speaker 2: our outlet. It's a vacation. It's the way to go
• 1:21
  Speaker 2: be kids and just kind of not think about.
• 1:23
  Speaker 1: The real world. I know I saw your up clip
• 1:27
  Speaker 1: and you said that when this is real for you,
• 1:30
  Speaker 1: how much it hits.
• 1:30
  Speaker 2: Yes. Yes. So we did that one. Actually, that movie
• 1:36
  Speaker 2: is so close to us. It's so close, near and
• 1:39
  Speaker 2: dear to our hearts because that scene, I bawl every
• 1:42
  Speaker 2: time that scene comes on. But yeah, we went to
• 1:46
  Speaker 2: Disneyland and we wore these t-shirts that said, infertility sucks.
• 1:50
  Speaker 2: And we had some amazing, amazing talks with people there
• 1:55
  Speaker 2: in Disneyland. And then I posted a video about it
• 1:58
  Speaker 2: back in January and that's the one that went viral.
• 2:00
  Speaker 2: And got so much hate because they're like why are
• 2:03
  Speaker 2: you in Disneyland doing this like this is so weird
• 2:05
  Speaker 2: and I was like you guys just don't understand like
• 2:08
  Speaker 2: this is when we were in the parks we had
• 2:11
  Speaker 2: a ton of amazing people come up and be like
• 2:13
  Speaker 2: yeah infertility does suck like I agree with you I
• 2:16
  Speaker 2: want your t-shirt like that kind of stuff where the
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  Speaker 2: online community did not feel that way but I capitalized
• 2:22
  Speaker 2: on it started posting more about infertility and was like
• 2:25
  Speaker 2: you know what I'm just gonna hit the gas and
• 2:28
  Speaker 2: we're gonna do it anyway and it has turned out
• 2:29
  Speaker 2: to be it has created an amazing community. I have
• 2:33
  Speaker 2: talked with so many amazing women and people in the
• 2:36
  Speaker 2: infertility community. I'm like, wow, you guys actually understand like
• 2:40
  Speaker 2: this is the side of the internet I want to
• 2:42
  Speaker 2: be in.
• 2:43
  Speaker 1: Yeah. Do you have those t-shirts people can buy?
• 2:46
  Speaker 2: I don't, I don't have them where people can buy.
• 2:50
  Speaker 2: I could probably figure out a way to do that,
• 2:52
  Speaker 2: but yeah.
• 2:53
  Speaker 1: You just like made it. Cause I was like, oh,
• 2:55
  Speaker 1: that's a cool shirt. I need to keep that in mind.
• 2:58
  Speaker 2: I had one that was red for Brayden that said
• 3:00
  Speaker 2: infertility sucks. And mine was like purple and it had
• 3:03
  Speaker 2: little like stars all over it for like Disney pixie dust.
• 3:07
  Speaker 2: But they were fun. I really like them. I still
• 3:10
  Speaker 2: wear them.
• 3:11
  Speaker 1: Well, so tell me, like, did you want to always
• 3:15
  Speaker 1: have kids? Like, was that your dream since you were
• 3:17
  Speaker 1: young or was that a recent desire after you got married?
• 3:22
  Speaker 2: Um, it has always been something that I knew I,
• 3:25
  Speaker 2: I wanted to be a mom. I wanted to be, um,
• 3:29
  Speaker 2: I wanted to experience motherhood and not only for myself,
• 3:33
  Speaker 2: but I, especially after I got married, I wanted to
• 3:36
  Speaker 2: see my husband as a dad. You know, he has
• 3:39
  Speaker 2: said this, I grew up saying, what do you want
• 3:41
  Speaker 2: to be when you grow up? I want to be
• 3:42
  Speaker 2: a mom. He said the same thing. I want to
• 3:44
  Speaker 2: be a dad. And so us being in this situation
• 3:48
  Speaker 2: now dealing with infertility has been so hard to navigate,
• 3:52
  Speaker 2: but at the same time it has made him and
• 3:54
  Speaker 2: I so strong and we are so, we are stronger
• 3:58
  Speaker 2: than I, than we've ever been. Um, because going through
• 4:02
  Speaker 2: something so deep and so hard like this, you, you
• 4:05
  Speaker 2: kind of have to grow close together, but yeah, we
• 4:08
  Speaker 2: both wanted to be parents, um, from a very young age.
• 4:13
  Speaker 1: And when you started trying to have kids, was it like,
• 4:18
  Speaker 1: what was your outlook? Were you confident that, oh, this
• 4:22
  Speaker 1: is probably going to happen pretty quickly. Like, I don't
• 4:24
  Speaker 1: see why there should be a problem. Or were you
• 4:27
  Speaker 1: more worried that, oh, maybe there was someone in your
• 4:30
  Speaker 1: family who experienced it. Maybe you were worried that would
• 4:32
  Speaker 1: be your experience. Like, how did it start out for you?
• 4:35
  Speaker 1: Was it, were you confident or?
• 4:37
  Speaker 2: Well, it was actually, so my, my husband and I
• 4:41
  Speaker 2: both are the oldest in our families and each of
• 4:43
  Speaker 2: our families. Yeah. So neither of us had seen what
• 4:46
  Speaker 2: pregnancy really looked like or having kids and that kind
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  Speaker 2: of thing back when we started trying. And so I
• 4:53
  Speaker 2: had no idea. I thought that, yeah, I didn't even
• 4:57
  Speaker 2: really understand the woman's cycle to very detail. You know,
• 5:01
  Speaker 2: I didn't really understand how that worked. And I thought
• 5:05
  Speaker 2: it just was one of those things that when, you know,
• 5:08
  Speaker 2: you were intimate, you had a baby. And that always
• 5:10
  Speaker 2: happened all the time. Yeah. I didn't know that it,
• 5:14
  Speaker 2: there was so much science behind it and people, you know,
• 5:18
  Speaker 2: I didn't know we'd spend so many thousands of dollars
• 5:20
  Speaker 2: trying to have a baby, but, but yeah, so I
• 5:25
  Speaker 2: did not know. Um, and then now my husband, he's
• 5:28
  Speaker 2: the oldest, right? So he's got a lot of younger
• 5:30
  Speaker 2: siblings and, um, the two right under him are actually
• 5:34
  Speaker 2: done having kids now. So we've got six nieces and
• 5:37
  Speaker 2: nephews on his side. And then my brother is five
• 5:40
  Speaker 2: years younger than me and he's actually on his way
• 5:42
  Speaker 2: to the hospital right now having his first kid.
• 5:45
  Speaker 1: And so it's kind of crazy.
• 5:48
  Speaker 2: It's on both sides.
• 5:50
  Speaker 1: So when did you start wondering if something was wrong?
• 5:56
  Speaker 2: Good question. It was probably around the year mark, around
• 6:02
  Speaker 2: eight months to a year, maybe a year and a
• 6:04
  Speaker 2: half is when we started really going to the OB.
• 6:07
  Speaker 2: I didn't even know fertility clinics were a thing. I
• 6:10
  Speaker 2: was just going to a regular OB at first. Um,
• 6:13
  Speaker 2: and then that's when they started, okay, well you can
• 6:16
  Speaker 2: take medicine. You can, you know, start tracking with your OPKs,
• 6:19
  Speaker 2: your ovulation strips and that stuff. And that's when I
• 6:23
  Speaker 2: really started learning about everything.