Latest / Girl, Date the Good Guy ™ | Healing After Heartbreak & A Toxic Relationship / Sis, Can We Be Honest? Why Praying Harder Won’t Change Him: Biblical Truth About Toxic Relationships, Abuse, and Letting Go

Transcript

Sis, Can We Be Honest? Why Praying Harder Won’t Change Him: Biblical Truth About Toxic Relationships, Abuse, and Letting Go · Girl, Date the Good Guy ™ | Healing After Heartbreak & A Toxic Relationship

• 0:00
  If you're done chasing broken love, empty promises, and lukewarm men,
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  and you're finally ready to reclaim your crown, heal your heart,
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  and attract the God-led love you were always meant for, you're in the right place.
• 0:12
  Hi, I'm Emily Jordan, your faith-based, healed feminine guide and relationship coach.
• 0:18
  I went from repeating the same heartbreaking cycles to experiencing a godly, healthy, aligned love.
• 0:25
  And now I help women just like you heal, rise, and prepare for God's very best.
• 0:31
  So are you ready to begin your royal training? Grab your crown,
• 0:36
  your heart, and your journal.
• 0:37
  Your royal transformation begins now.
• 0:41
  Hey sis, before we get into today's episode, I just want to remind you,
• 0:45
  you were never meant to fight for your heart alone.
• 0:48
  If you're ready for real healing, God-led growth, and safe sisterhood,
• 0:53
  I want to invite you into the Royal Guard, our private Facebook community.
• 0:59
  This is your covering, your training ground, and your sacred sisterhood,
• 1:04
  where we're protecting our peace, raising our standards, and learning how to
• 1:08
  set and honor God-led boundaries together.
• 1:11
  If your heart is craving support and alignment, come join us inside the Royal
• 1:16
  Guard on Facebook. The link is below in the show notes. I'll see you there.
• 1:22
  Hey sis, welcome back to another episode of Girl Date the Good Guy.
• 1:26
  It's your girl Emily, and thank you so much for being here with me today.
• 1:32
  Today's episode is not going to be cute. It's not filtered and it's not sugar-coated.
• 1:38
  This is going to be a real sister-to-sister, heart-to-heart truth in love.
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  Because God has put something heavy on my spirit.
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  There are too many women staying in relationships that are breaking them in
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  the name of being faithful.
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  Too many of us were taught to pray harder, wait longer, and endure more,
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  even when God has already whispered, daughter, this is not my will for you.
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  So today, I'm sharing my story, my mistakes, my healing, my freedom,
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  not to shame you, not to pressure you, but to set you free.
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  If you've ever been afraid of disappointing God by choosing peace,
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  if you've ever wondered whether walking away meant failing him,
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  if you've ever stayed because you thought suffering was obedience.
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  Sis, this episode is for you.
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  Let's talk. I remember the toxic cycle I was in.
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  And let me tell you, that thing was alive from the pit of hell.
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  Because for so long, I thought I was being faithful. I thought I was being obedient.
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  I thought I was being a praying wife. I didn't want to disappoint God.
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  I didn't want him to be ashamed of me.
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  I was terrified that if I walked away, if I divorced, if I chose peace,
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  God would look at me and think I failed.
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  And nobody told me the truth. Not one therapist.
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  Not one Christian counselor. It was always pray and wait. Be patient.
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  Don't give up, don't divorce.
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  And looking back now, that was a lie.
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  Because God never told me to stay in harm.
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  I believe that if I just prayed harder, fasted more, cried more,
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  believed more, God would change him.
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  But here's what God had to teach me.
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  God cannot change someone who refuses him.
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  It says in Ezekiel, Ezekiel, I think I said that right, 36, 26,
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  I will give you a new heart and put a new spirit in you.
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  But on notice, God gives a new heart to the willing, not the resistant,
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  not the prideful, not the unrepentant.
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  When you are praying for your husband you should see fruit.
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  Matthew 7 16 says you will
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  know them by their fruit not their promises
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  not their apologies not their tears their fruit and for 17 years my 17 year
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  cycle there was no fruit no growth no accountability no repentance no real transformation.
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  Just continued disrespect. And God began to show me over time,
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  Emily, this was never my will for you.
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  Because 1 Corinthians 13, 4-7 says, Love is patient. Love is kind.
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  Love is not abusive, not dishonoring, and not selfish.
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  And what I was living in was not love. And Colossians 3.19 says it clearly.
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  Husbands, love your wives and do not be harsh with them.
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  Not sometimes, not when you're in a good mood, not after you hurt her.
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  Do not be harsh. That is God's command, not a suggestion.
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  I was holding on to hope, but it wasn't biblical hope. It was emotional attachment,
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  fear-based hope, loneliness hope.
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  Romans 8, 7 says, The mind governed by the flesh is hostile to God.
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  A man who is hostile toward God will eventually be harmful to you.
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  Every single time.
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  And praying for someone who refuses to change will cost you.
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  It cost me my youth, my peace, my confidence, my joy, my energy, my time. 17 years.
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  And I know God allowed me to walk through that so I could come back and tell
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  you the truth, so I could set other women free.
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  Because 2 Corinthians 1.4 says, God comforts us so we can comfort others.
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  So today, sis, I'm speaking directly to you. There is a time to pray,
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  and there is a time to release.
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  Ecclesiastes 3.1 says, To everything there is a season.
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  Some of you are trying to stay in a season God already closed.
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  If someone is committed to staying the same, you are not called to stay stuck.
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  If their heart is turned from God, you are allowed to let go.
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  Because Amos 3.3 says, You cannot walk in obedience with someone who loves disobedience.
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  Stop calling endurance what God is calling release.
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  Stop calling suffering faith. Stop calling abuse assignment,
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  because God never called you to stay in disrespect.
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  Ephesians 5.25 says, Husbands, love your wives as Christ loved the church.
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  Christ does not abuse. Christ does not belittle. Christ does not manipulate.
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  Christ does not neglect.
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  And Psalms 11.5 says, The Lord examines the righteous, but the wicked,
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  those who love violence, He hates with a passion.
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  God does not partner with violence. God does not excuse someone who is cruel.
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  God does not bless abuse. And Proverbs 6, 16 through 19 tells us,
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  There are things God hates.
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  Pride, lying, hands that shed innocent blood, a heart that plots evil,
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  one who stirs up conflict.
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  That is not kingdom behavior. That is not godly leadership.
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  That is not biblical marriage. Too many women are staying in relationships. God never designed.
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  Abuse is not God's plan. It is the enemy's tactic.
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  John 10.10 says, The thief comes to steal, kill, and destroy,
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  and some of y'all are being destroyed in the name of being faithful. Stop it.
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  Let's go back to the beginning. Before sin, before distortion,
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  before dysfunction, Genesis shows us Eve was a gift.
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  She was cherished. She was covered. She was honored.
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  That was God's design. And the enemy has been lying to women ever since.
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  Stay, suffer, be quiet, endure abuse.
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  But Galatians 5.1 says, it is for freedom that Christ has set us free.
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  Not bondage, not trauma, not fear, not control.
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  I'm here to expose the lie. And I hope and I pray that this makes hell nervous.
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  Because Proverbs 31 25 says, she is clothed with strength and dignity,
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  not shame, not fear, not brokenness.
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  Sis, Send this to someone who needs freedom today. Someone who thinks pain equals purpose.
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  Someone who thinks suffering equals obedience. Someone who thinks God wants her broken.
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  It was not God who broke your heart. It was betrayal.
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  It was sin. It was disobedience. Not God.
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  James 1 17 says, every good and perfect gift comes from above.
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  Abuse is not from him. Confusion is not from him.
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  Neglect is not from him. And today, it's time to get up.
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  Isaiah 61 says, Arise, shine, for your light has come.
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  It's time to stop recycling pain.
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  We go back because we still have hope.
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  But Proverbs 28, 13 says, whoever confesses and repents finds mercy.
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  Where there is no repentance, there is no future.
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  Where there is no change, there is no covenant.
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  Where there is no fruit, there is no root.
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  You deserve better. And God agrees, sis, because Jeremiah 29,
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  11 says, he has plans to prosper you and not to harm you. Let's pray.
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  Father God, we come before you right now with humble hearts.
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  Lord, you see every woman listening to this episode.
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  You see her tears, her confusion, her prayers, her pain.
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  You see what she's been carrying in silence.
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  And today, God, we ask you to meet her right where she is.
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  Father, in the name of Jesus, I pray that every lie of the enemy be broken right now.
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  Every lie that says she has to stay to be faithful. Every lie that says suffering is obedience.
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  Every lie that says abuse is love. Every lie that says she's stuck.
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  We cancel it. The word says, whom the Son sets free is free indeed.
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  So today, God, release freedom, release clarity, release courage.
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  Release peace, release wisdom, release healing.
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  Lord, I pray that you would soften hearts where repentance is possible and give
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  strength where separation is necessary.
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  Give her discernment to know the difference.
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  Father, restore what has been stolen. Restore her confidence. Restore her identity.
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  Restore her joy. Restore her voice. Restore her faith.
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  Heal the places that were wounded by betrayal. Heal the places that were bruised by disappointment.
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  Heal the places that were damaged by neglect and abuse.
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  Remind her today that she is your daughter.
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  Chosen, loved, valuable, protected, covered.
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  I pray that fear will not make her stay where you are calling her to rise.
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  Give her boldness to obey you. Give her peace in her decisions.
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  Give her strength for the journey ahead.
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  And Lord, surround her with godly community, with safe voices,
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  with wise counsel, with sisters who will walk with her in truth and love.
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  We trust you, God. We surrender to you. We choose you over comfort.
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  We choose freedom over familiarity.
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  We choose healing over history. have your way in her life.
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  In the mighty name of Jesus, amen.
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  Sis, if this episode spoke to your heart, don't keep it to yourself.
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  Send it to a sister who needs freedom today. Share it with a woman who's been praying in silence.
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  Post it and let God use your obedience to reach someone else.
• 14:04
  And if you're on this journey of healing with me, make sure you're subscribed.
• 14:08
  I would love for you to leave a review. It blesses me big and come into our
• 14:14
  Facebook community, our private Facebook community, the Royal Guard.
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  The link is in the show notes, okay?
• 14:22
  I want you to stay connected to this community of women who are choosing wholeness
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  over heartbreak because you are not alone.
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  You are not crazy. You are not weak.
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  You are becoming whole. I love you.
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  I will be praying for your freedom this week. Bye for now.
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  Sis, you did that. You showed up for your healing and that is royal energy.
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  If this episode challenged you, grew you, or called you higher,
• 14:51
  share it with another sister who's ready to reclaim her crown too.
• 14:54
  And if you've got 30 seconds, it would bless me big if you'd leave a review on Apple Podcasts.
• 15:00
  It helps more women step into their royal identity and join the Good Guys Society
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  movement. Until next time, keep your crown on, your standard tie,
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  and your heart in royal alignment.