Latest / Good Morning From The Chicken Coop! / Season 2 - Episode 189 - How do you define confidence?

Transcript

Season 2 - Episode 189 - How do you define confidence? · Good Morning From The Chicken Coop!

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  Welcome to the Good Morning From the Chicken Coop Podcast with
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  Kim Johnson, your creative strategist and master mindset
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  coach. Filled with inspiration,
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  distinctions, perspectives, and possibilities, we help you to
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  cultivate a mindset that leads you to create the best version
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  of yourself you could ever imagine.
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  Join Kim every morning from one of her favorite happy places,
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  her chicken coop, along with all her chickens.
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  Hey, everybody. Good morning.
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  From the very hot chicken coop. It's already hot here.
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  OK, so today we are talking about confidence and how you
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  decide you have confidence because this isn't something
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  that someone can give to you. You have to decide that it's
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  yours. You're gonna have to claim it.
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  And every person has a different path to saying I have confidence
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  or I don't have confidence. It's not like you can walk into
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  a store and purchase it and come out and say, well, now I have
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  boatloads of confidence. You know, you think about this
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  with children and in sports. Most people who have kids that
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  are into sports are. You know, super supportive of
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  it. They want them to be successful.
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  They'll buy them the right tools and they'll say, you know, I
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  want to build their confidence. So I'm going to get them all the
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  right things to use and then they're going to have more
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  confidence. Well, maybe that's what it
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  always comes down to. Maybe because you have to decide
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  for yourself when you're a person that you're going to
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  choose that path. And if you don't choose that
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  path, it's. It's usually because you feel
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  you need to know more, you need more practice, You have
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  disempowering beliefs about yourself in general, But me
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  either way doesn't make a difference.
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  It's all an internal process, and the point of this
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  conversation today is to recognize that it is personal to
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  each and every individual out there.
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  You can't say that your rules for confidence are someone
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  else's rules for confidence, and when you do that.
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  You're making large, gross exaggerations and assumptions
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  about what their belief system is giving them.
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  So it's disempowering in general because you're coming with your
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  rules, trying to move someone else in a direction very, very,
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  very tricky territory to go into.
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  You don't want to play in that arena.
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  It's not fruitful. What it does is it sets you up
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  for failure in more ways than you could ever imagine.
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  Because one, it takes the other person out.
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  And again, it doesn't have to be a child.
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  It could be a coworker, it could be a partner, it could whoever.
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  It takes the other person out because they feel now like
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  you've put your rules on the way it has to be done on them.
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  And maybe you have and maybe that's OK if you're trying to
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  say to them, listen, I hired you to do something, I need you to
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  do it just this way. That happens.
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  But that doesn't mean the perfect person is going to be
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  confident, even if you show them your exact way, because their
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  brain is going to have a different interpretation of it.
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  So. What makes the transition easier
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  is if you ask the question, do you know how you specifically
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  gain confidence? And you put the person in a
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  state of going internal and trying to figure out how they
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  decide they have confidence in something.
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  And that really is what it comes down to.
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  It's like it's a decision, it's a oh wait, let me think about
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  that for a second. How do I know when I have
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  confidence? And let me tell you, it's not an
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  easy thing to delineate. It's actually quite.
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  Confusing because I myself, when I've had to do it before and
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  someone says, well, how do you have such confidence when you're
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  coaching anybody and anything, whatever their arena is and I
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  have to really think about that, I pause and go, huh, that's
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  true. And.
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  Maybe it's the number of hours, maybe it's the experience, maybe
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  it's the amount of things that you've learned.
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  Read life experience. But each one of us has a
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  different path to deciding how we did.
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  We define our confidence, and how do you know when you're
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  confident? So you have to ask yourself that
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  question. If you're trying to better
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  yourself, if you're trying to move in up in the world, if
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  you're let's say you're looking for a new job, you're trying to
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  decide if you want to have a new place to live.
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  This calls on asking questions. This is a place where you go and
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  you get curious and you stop and you pause and you ask really
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  good questions of yourself. And that is one of the first
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  ones. Well, you know, besides knowing
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  what it is that you're looking for, you have to say, where does
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  my confidence lie in this? Is it in the doing?
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  Is it in the knowing? Is it in?
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  Other people helping me where does my confidence come in?
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  And then have to define how do I build my confidence?
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  What do I do to essentially build my confidence.
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  And you won't know unless you ask the questions.
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  You won't know unless you're able to define that piece of it.
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  So you know, being curious, as I've said before many times here
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  on this podcast is all about being you know in your
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  superpower using your superpowers for your greater
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  good and. Building your own confidence in
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  whatever you're going to do. There are many times where I
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  don't have confidence in what I'm doing, but I have confidence
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  in the fact that I know I will stick to it until it's done.
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  And that's what gets me through it.
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  It's the grit. It's that, it's that piece of
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  the confidence in it. You know, when I started the
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  Gardens and Canning and all of that, I didn't know Jack about
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  it. I was just, you know, I had done
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  it with my aunt years ago and. She was always in charge and I
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  was just like, you know, the first mate.
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  She would tell me what to do, but quite honestly, I was not
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  paying attention at the level of someone who was going to
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  replicate on my own. I always thought I would have
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  her to do this with and when I moved, I don't.
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  So you know, it's one of those things where I had to gain that
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  confidence again and. Even still, even still, when I'm
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  doing it, I will always call her in the morning and be like, OK,
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  I'm, I'm, I'm canning today. Oh, and she talks me through
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  some of the stuff and I've done it for years now.
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  But the reality is I still have her as a safety net.
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  That's one of my little rules. And I have to learn to take
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  better notes as she tells me all the time, take better notes on
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  it. And because I won't remember and
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  I think I'll remember and I don't, and that's the crazy
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  part. But in any event.
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  How do you define confidence? And how do you know when you
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  have it? So get curious and figure it
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  out. All right, my friends, have a
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  blessed day and I'll see you tomorrow.
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  Bye.