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Practical Things To Put In Place Before You Marry · Apostle Lazarus Femi

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  Speaker 1: Apostle Femi Lazarus is a man raised by God to
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  Speaker 1: demonstrate his wisdom and authority to the last day church.
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  Speaker 1: He is the lead pastor of Sphere of Light Church
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  Speaker 1: and God told him years ago that a time will
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  Speaker 1: come where my wisdom will be needed to navigate tough
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  Speaker 1: times in the body of Christ.
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  Speaker 2: Then I will cause your voice to be heard.
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  Speaker 1: And all who pay attention to my word on your
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  Speaker 1: lips will not lack light and direction. He is a
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  Speaker 1: man sent from God, sent to raise God's end time armies.
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  Speaker 1: With Apostle Fermi Lazarus, every minute counts as you listen attentively.
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  Speaker 3: Alright, let's turn our Bibles please quickly. Ephesians chapter number 5.
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  Speaker 3: Ephesians chapter number 5. Now I take the reading from
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  Speaker 3: verse Ephesians 5.
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  Speaker 2: If you are there, say Amen. Come on, say Amen.
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  Speaker 3: Now let's start the reading from verse 19 so we
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  Speaker 3: can have a bit of background to understand what the
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  Speaker 3: Bible is saying there.
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  Speaker 2: Are you ready?
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  Speaker 3: And spiritual songs. Singing and making melody in your hearts
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  Speaker 3: to the Lord. Giving thanks always for all things unto
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  Speaker 3: God and the Father. In the name of our Lord
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  Speaker 3: Jesus Christ. Submitting yourselves one to another in the fear
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  Speaker 3: of God.
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  Speaker 2: Now verse 22.
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  Speaker 3: Can the women, the ladies if you are in the
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  Speaker 3: house say Amen. Now can we take verse 22 and
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  Speaker 3: 23 together.
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  Speaker 2: Ladies 1, 2, 3 go. as unto the Lord.
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  Speaker 3: For the husband is the head of the wife, even
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  Speaker 3: as Christ is the head of the church, and is the.
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  Speaker 2: Savior of the body. Alright. I read verse 24 as
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  Speaker 2: the pastor.
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  Speaker 3: Therefore, as the church is subject to Christ, let the
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  Speaker 3: wives be to their own husbands in everything.
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  Speaker 2: In how many things? How many things? Everything. Alright. Men,
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  Speaker 2: are you ready? So the men, we take Verse 25, 1, 2, 3, go. Again, 1, 2, 3, go. Okay.
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  Speaker 2: So I think there's a tip there.
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  Speaker 3: Anybody who is not ready to die for somebody should
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  Speaker 3: not marry the person.
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  Speaker 2: Do you understand? Do you understand? Men, you are quiet now.
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  Speaker 3: To be man, no reach that one. Do you understand
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  Speaker 3: what I've said? If you are not ready to die
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  Speaker 3: for a person, don't marry the person. So hide it
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  Speaker 3: to your punchline. I can die for you. I think
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  Speaker 3: the ladies are happy. As if you are expecting a bullet.
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  Speaker 3: Praise God. But I want us to now, but that's
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  Speaker 3: a serious note. the headship of the man is after
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  Speaker 3: the model of Christ. And the man should be ready
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  Speaker 3: to lay down his life as the head.
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  Speaker 2: Even it be.
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  Speaker 3: Now, there's been cases where robbers went to the house
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  Speaker 3: and the man was shouting, that's my wife.
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  Speaker 2: Deal with that. You'll spare my life.
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  Speaker 3: That's my wife. Ladies, you have to investigate. I'm going
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  Speaker 3: to talk about how to identify a real man though.
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  Speaker 3: Because Beards and sea sparks don't make real men. I
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  Speaker 3: said beards and sea sparks don't make real men. There
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  Speaker 3: are many more things that are needed. So let's go
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  Speaker 3: into practical aspect of these teachings. Now, let me state this.
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  Speaker 3: Marriage is for people or individuals who were first and
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  Speaker 3: foremost singles. Now to be single doesn't mean to be
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  Speaker 3: lonely or to be alone.
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  Speaker 2: To be single means to be complete. It means to
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  Speaker 2: be what? Complete.
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  Speaker 3: So anyone who needs another person to complete him or
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  Speaker 3: her is not ready for marriage. So first you get
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  Speaker 3: your definition of You are complete. And I give our
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  Speaker 3: case as an example. When myself and my wife got married, I.
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  Speaker 2: Was single. That's the truth.
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  Speaker 3: Already pursuing the assignment God has given to me in
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  Speaker 3: the middle of it. Everything I need to do were
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  Speaker 3: being done.
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  Speaker 2: Are you following what I'm saying here?
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  Speaker 3: Everything were being done. Because sometimes the time people should
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  Speaker 3: use getting their singleness right. They were mourning it. They
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  Speaker 3: could not wait to get out. Only for them not
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  Speaker 3: to find themselves. They couldn't wait to get out. Like,
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  Speaker 3: let's just be somebody. How will I be sleeping at night?
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  Speaker 3: Nobody's saying I miss you. Nobody's saying I love you. See,
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  Speaker 3: that thing that keeps asking for those, it's okay to
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  Speaker 3: be loved. But you see, that urge for it, is
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  Speaker 3: a sign that there's an addiction to love. Sometimes it
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  Speaker 3: happens to people who have daddy issues. I'm going to
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  Speaker 3: talk about daddy issues before we finish. I'm going to
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  Speaker 3: talk about mommy issues. I'm going to talk about soul
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  Speaker 3: ties and get into all the deep stuff. Are you
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  Speaker 3: following what I'm saying here? We need to get there.
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  Speaker 2: Are you following what I'm saying here?
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  Speaker 3: So, see, put your right hand on your chest and say,
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  Speaker 3: I'm complete in Christ. Say it again, I'm complete in Christ. Alright,
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  Speaker 3: so sometimes some people give the opposite sex an impression
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  Speaker 3: that I need you to come into my life. If not,
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  Speaker 3: I will die. I can't sleep without you. I can't
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  Speaker 3: eat without you. Tell me, what can I do? That's
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  Speaker 3: the song, right? That's the song that people sing for ladies.
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  Speaker 3: I can't do it without you. I can't sleep without you.
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  Speaker 3: I can't do it again. I can't breathe without you.
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  Speaker 3: If you leave me now, I will die. If you
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  Speaker 3: leave me now, where will I go? That's why breakup
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  Speaker 3: looks like suicide. Because they are addicted to the person.
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  Speaker 2: Singleness means you have found a way to be complete
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  Speaker 2: in Christ. You know who you are. You are loved
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  Speaker 2: by him.
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  Speaker 3: And you see, it is very frustrating if you expect
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  Speaker 3: people to love you when you have not understood the
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  Speaker 3: love of God. you will frustrate the people. Because they
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  Speaker 3: can't give you what only Christ gives. And you will
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  Speaker 3: frustrate yourself. Do you understand what I'm saying here? You
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  Speaker 3: will frustrate them. See, have you seen people commit suicide
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  Speaker 3: because they are in love?
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  Speaker 2: No, these guys let me now, where will I go
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  Speaker 2: with my life?
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  Speaker 3: When people break up with you or when you break up,
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  Speaker 3: it will go back to where you used to be
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  Speaker 3: if you have a place. The reason people ask, where
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  Speaker 3: do I start from? Because they were nowhere before. It
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  Speaker 3: was the relationship that gave them meaning. And any relationship
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  Speaker 3: that gives people meaning should end. Because only God should
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  Speaker 3: give you meaning. Where do I start from now? I
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  Speaker 3: understand time wasting is a bad thing. Nobody should waste
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  Speaker 3: anybody's time. I'm speaking from experience. Do you understand what
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  Speaker 3: I'm saying? But the fact is that some people don't
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  Speaker 3: even know where to start from again. Like, my life
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  Speaker 3: has no meaning. Do you understand what I'm saying here?
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  Speaker 2: Say it, I'm completing Christ. Come on, say it again.
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  Speaker 2: Say it again.
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  Speaker 3: So tonight we need to look at, before people are into,
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  Speaker 3: can we get married? We are getting married. And I've
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  Speaker 3: said it, anywhere there is haste, you might not know
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  Speaker 3: the person you are marrying. Because once you bring that
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  Speaker 3: thing in place immediately, number one, it's a sign that
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  Speaker 3: there's no emotional intelligence.
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  Speaker 2: Because the two people now will be giving themselves the
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  Speaker 2: marriage format.
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  Speaker 3: And that's why sometimes unbelievers are better at being friends
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  Speaker 3: than believers.
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  Speaker 2: Sometimes. Sometimes.
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  Speaker 3: Because they don't fake anything. They don't hide anything. Tia, Nagaria,
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  Speaker 3: they think you will chop. Tia, bless you, brother John.
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  Speaker 3: Brother Nakani, how are you today? So good to see you, sir.
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  Speaker 3: The person who wants to marry you, say, sir. The
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  Speaker 3: worst one are the brothers that want to marry a sister.
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  Speaker 3: They will first sisterize you. Sister Joy, you give me joy.
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  Speaker 2: Tia, punchline. Punchline. Punchline day, but I'm not ready to
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  Speaker 2: help anybody tonight. It's so amazing. Things we do.
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  Speaker 3: And that's why in this church, we try to, I mean,
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  Speaker 3: we're all brothers and sisters in Christ, but we try
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  Speaker 3: to pull down those filters.
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  Speaker 2: So that we don't have a house of pretense i'm
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  Speaker 2: not saying where.
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  Speaker 3: People call themselves brothers and sisters they are pretending but
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  Speaker 3: sometimes it covers many things that you never get to
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  Speaker 3: know them are you following what i'm saying here you
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  Speaker 3: never really get to know those things Do you understand
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  Speaker 3: what I'm saying? The person you are dating, do you
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  Speaker 3: know the person? Or you are still pretending? What do
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  Speaker 3: you say when you talk? What does the person know
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  Speaker 3: about you?
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  Speaker 2: Some people are not relatable. Do you understand what I'm saying?
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  Speaker 2: They are like people that sleep with raincoats. Always on guard.
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  Speaker 3: Always on guard. I shared my story. I was in
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  Speaker 3: a relationship with a sister. That's my worst experience. I
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  Speaker 3: didn't know as of then that I can have any
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  Speaker 3: experience worse than the ones I've had. Every time we
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  Speaker 3: sit down to talk, she talks about angels. Categories of angels.
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  Speaker 3: Encounter with cherubims, practically. Encounter with seraphims and all those things.
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  Speaker 3: And I'll sit down, my whole life will flash before
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  Speaker 3: me And I will ask myself, is this what I
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  Speaker 3: want to do for the rest of my life?
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  Speaker 2: In all honesty. In all honesty. So one day, she's
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  Speaker 2: been talking. I said, let me even ask you. What's
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  Speaker 2: your love language? It's prayer. It's good for people to
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  Speaker 2: pray together. But you are human. Is it act of service?
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  Speaker 2: Is it gift? Is it Just know, this prayer. I said, okay.
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  Speaker 3: So I became sick. And it was not a sickness
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  Speaker 3: that was that serious, but it was. And then they
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  Speaker 3: told her, pastor is sick. So she came. I was
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  Speaker 3: laying down. My roommates, all of them got up. And
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  Speaker 3: then she came, she looked at me. And she did
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  Speaker 3: like this. Look at me. Look at me.
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  Speaker 2: Power. Something is going to happen here. Something is going
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  Speaker 2: to happen here. Mayazunto. Tap my chest. Be healed now.
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  Speaker 2: In all honesty, I love prayers. But there are people
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  Speaker 2: that can make it look like you don't like prayer.
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  Speaker 2: when she give me that slam like three times I'm
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  Speaker 2: fine now get up do the things you could not
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  Speaker 2: do before.
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  Speaker 3: That day I made up my mind I said all
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  Speaker 3: this wahala now you are putting me through just super
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  Speaker 3: pack noodles and egg and tea I'll be fine though
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  Speaker 3: because what is worrying me is no more than that
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  Speaker 3: I'll just be fine though but that's where we found
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  Speaker 3: ourselves So we need to talk about the practical aspect
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  Speaker 3: because sometimes we as believers, we don't deal with these things.
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  Speaker 3: And we live a life of lies. Only for us
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  Speaker 3: never to know them.
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  Speaker 2: Are you ready?
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  Speaker 3: Number one, there are some things you must understand before
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  Speaker 3: I start.
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  Speaker 2: Marriage is not just a destination. It is a journey.
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  Speaker 2: It is a journey. It is a journey that requires
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  Speaker 2: a lot of equipping.
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  Speaker 3: More importantly, because the quality of the life you will
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  Speaker 3: live depends on it, requires being equipped. You cannot over-prepare
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  Speaker 3: for marriage. You cannot over-prepare. At the end of the day,
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  Speaker 3: you still meet things you were not really prepared for.
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  Speaker 3: Are you following what I'm saying here? You still have
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  Speaker 3: culture shock. Because in marriage, you are trying to live
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  Speaker 3: and spend the rest of your life with the person
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  Speaker 3: you have never lived with. And there was a research
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  Speaker 3: done by Oxford University that showed that couples who waited
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  Speaker 3: till after marriage succeed more in marriage than those who
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  Speaker 3: start living together before getting married.
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  Speaker 2: So cohabitation is forbidden. It is a sin. When you
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  Speaker 2: begin to cohabit, you are bringing temptation to your doorstep.
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  Speaker 3: So the journey of marriage requires a lot of equipping
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  Speaker 3: because the quality of your life depends on it.
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  Speaker 2: Whether you spend your life arguing and making up, or you.
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  Speaker 3: Spend your life fulfilling purpose, depends on how well you
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  Speaker 3: are prepared. So, get busy maximizing your single days. Don't
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  Speaker 3: mourn it. See it as an opportunity to be equipped,
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  Speaker 3: to learn, to prepare. And like I said, you cannot over-prepare.
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  Speaker 3: Is that okay now? I said, is that okay now?
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  Speaker 3: So let me begin to show you practical things that
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  Speaker 3: you need to put in place before you get married.
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  Speaker 3: So I'm going to break this into the two genders.
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  Speaker 3: Is that okay now? So who do I start with?
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  Speaker 3: Let me start with the ladies. Practical things a woman
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  Speaker 3: needs to put in place before you get married. Now
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  Speaker 3: all these things I'm going to list are not the
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  Speaker 3: only things but they're important.
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  Speaker 2: Is that okay? Okay.
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  Speaker 3: They are not the only thing, but they are what?
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  Speaker 3: They are very important. They are very important. Number one,
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  Speaker 3: as a woman, the first thing to put in place, heal.
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  Speaker 2: Heal. Heal. Heal completely. Heal from your past.
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  Speaker 3: Heal from the dysfunctionality of your background.
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  Speaker 2: Heal from your exes. Heal from the pains afflicted on
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  Speaker 2: you by your father. Heal from your emotional traumas. Now
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  Speaker 2: listen to this.
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  Speaker 3: The journey of healing is between you and God, not
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  Speaker 3: between you and your husband. Now that's a very bitter truth.
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  Speaker 3: There are wounds that only God can help you mend.
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  Speaker 3: And the danger of not healing before you say, I do,
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  Speaker 3: is that you begin to bleed on the one who
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  Speaker 3: didn't enjoy you.
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  Speaker 2: That's the danger. So you need to heal.
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  Speaker 3: And this is a very serious one. One of the
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  Speaker 3: signs that you need healing is that you overreact.
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  Speaker 2: Overreact.
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  Speaker 3: Overreacting to things is a sign that you are seeing
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  Speaker 3: someone else in your spouse. Overreacting to your spouse, reaction
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  Speaker 3: out of fear. Sometimes you are not really responding to him.
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  Speaker 3: You are responding to the person he reminds you of.
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  Speaker 3: You are seeing your dad in him. You are seeing
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  Speaker 3: your ex in him. You are seeing the person who
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  Speaker 3: tried to rape you in him. Are you seeing that now?
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  Speaker 3: You have seen the people who insulted you while growing
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  Speaker 3: up in him. In from the words spoken to you.
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  Speaker 2: The wrong words. Those who called you wicked and who
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  Speaker 2: said you can't keep a home.
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  Speaker 1: Heal.
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  Speaker 3: You need to heal before you deal. A very important
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  Speaker 3: thing you must get right is your healing. And like
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  Speaker 3: I said, Your healing process is between you and the
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  Speaker 3: Holy Spirit. He's the one who can mend broken hearts.
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  Speaker 3: Are you following what I'm saying here? And see, sometimes,
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  Speaker 3: listen to this and listen well. If you keep carrying
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  Speaker 3: the baggages of these emotional traumas, and you keep carrying them,
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  Speaker 3: what is going to happen is that you keep multiplying
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  Speaker 3: the pain. Because people will just not understand the reason
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  Speaker 3: why this is a very good girl.
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  Speaker 2: But you can't seem to get through her. She seems
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  Speaker 2: to be walled. Walled everywhere.
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  Speaker 3: She does not respond to words of affirmation. Not because
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  Speaker 3: she's not emotional. But because that hurts. You see, sometimes
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  Speaker 3: people feel it is strength not to be soft and
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  Speaker 3: loving as a woman.
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  Speaker 2: It is not strength. It is a weakness. It is
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  Speaker 2: a weakness.
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  Speaker 3: A real woman is feminine. She's not trying to be
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  Speaker 3: another man. And sometimes, instead of people healing, they get hardened.
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  Speaker 3: There is a way life can make you hard. The
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  Speaker 3: pain is still underneath, but there is now a wall.
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  Speaker 3: If something happens that punctures it, you see that person
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  Speaker 3: is not just bleeding, there is now moko and different
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  Speaker 3: things under. Some people are not healed, they are now hard.
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  Speaker 3: They found a way to cope with life. And what
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  Speaker 3: is happening is that they have severed certain aspect of
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  Speaker 3: their life and say.
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  Speaker 2: I can't give this one to a man i can't
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  Speaker 2: trust a man like this anymore life happens to all
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  Speaker 2: of us but the only way to stay winning is
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  Speaker 2: to heal it's to heal sometimes some children can't understand
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  Speaker 2: They can't understand the reason why, particularly girls, why they
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  Speaker 2: are not in touch with their mothers.
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  Speaker 3: Because the woman too is not fine. And sometimes what
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  Speaker 3: we have is wounded people, we're raising wounded people. And
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  Speaker 3: we communicate the injuries.
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  Speaker 2: We get ideologies and philosophies from our injuries.
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  Speaker 3: No trust man. Wala for who trust man? You are
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  Speaker 3: going to marry someone and you say don't trust the person.
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  Speaker 3: And you wonder the reason why you are in pain.
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  Speaker 3: Now it's even becoming a general thing that women are
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  Speaker 3: telling their daughters that if you want to have peace,
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  Speaker 3: don't take your husband's phone.
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  Speaker 2: Because of what they saw in their own husband's phone. Here.
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  Speaker 3: You have a past. You have scars. You have mistakes.
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  Speaker 3: You have exes. Those who promised you marriage. Promised you
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  Speaker 3: heaven and earth. I don't know where you expect the
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  Speaker 3: rest of us to live. But the guy left. People
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  Speaker 3: you never thought will walk out of your life one day.
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  Speaker 2: But they left.
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  Speaker 3: And when they left, they left with the most potent
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  Speaker 3: part of you. And it looks like you've been struggling
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  Speaker 3: to heal.
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  Speaker 2: See, let me say this to you.
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  Speaker 3: If you refuse to forgive the people who betrayed you,
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  Speaker 3: you are injuring yourself again. If you refuse to forgive
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  Speaker 3: that ex who broke up with you massively. Have you
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  Speaker 3: seen people? You see, we only talk about punchlines. There
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  Speaker 3: are punchlines for breakup. One boy broke up with a
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  Speaker 3: girl and told the girl that when Daddy Joe was
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  Speaker 3: praying for me, Daddy Joe said, it is better to
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  Speaker 3: be single than to be married. I said, that's a
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  Speaker 3: word from the Lord.
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  Speaker 2: I should break up with you. Only God knows the number.
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  Speaker 3: Of people that have used my name to lie.
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  Speaker 2: As opposed to what's praying for me. If anybody has
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  Speaker 2: told you that lie, I didn't say anything like that.
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  Speaker 2: You know. In fact, people break up mercilessly with text message.
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  Speaker 2: I'm done with you. Do your worst. Join your five years.
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  Speaker 2: And the girl look around and say, if this is
• 22:39
  Speaker 2: what love is, I'm done. No, you are not done.
• 22:42
  Speaker 2: You will love again. I said you are not done.
• 22:47
  Speaker 2: You will love again.
• 22:49
  Speaker 3: Anyways, those who left you, it's God trying to show
• 22:51
  Speaker 3: you that they are not the only ones that exist.
• 22:53
  Speaker 3: He still has better. He has sons. I said God
• 22:57
  Speaker 3: has sons. Now let me say this to you. Life
• 23:01
  Speaker 3: is not easy for the blind. You are not worthless.
• 23:05
  Speaker 3: You are only around those who don't know your value.
• 23:08
  Speaker 3: When the person you were designed for comes, you'll be
• 23:11
  Speaker 3: everything they've prayed for and more. So why should you
• 23:14
  Speaker 3: be crying over those that want to manage you? You
• 23:17
  Speaker 3: saw what that girl wrote that time, last week. Said,
• 23:20
  Speaker 3: I have somebody I want to date, but I said
• 23:22
  Speaker 3: I should come to you first to check you out.
• 23:27
  Speaker 2: We'll get there. Now, emotional trauma is real. Very, very real.
• 23:39
  Speaker 2: It is so bad that.
• 23:43
  Speaker 3: In marriage, some women cannot bear their husbands touching them
• 23:47
  Speaker 3: because of their rape or near-rape experience they've had.
• 23:51
  Speaker 2: And every time the man comes close, he looks like
• 23:54
  Speaker 2: he's about to rape her again.
• 23:56
  Speaker 3: You see, if you don't let that aspect to be
• 23:59
  Speaker 3: dealt with, you are giving the devil a foothold in
• 24:02
  Speaker 3: your life. And the devil will mess you up. You
• 24:06
  Speaker 3: need to heal and forgive. Not because of the person,
• 24:09
  Speaker 3: but because of you. The one who is in prison
• 24:12
  Speaker 3: is you. Not the person you have not forgiven. And
• 24:16
  Speaker 3: you see, the funny thing is that people can hurt
• 24:18
  Speaker 3: you and move on and still succeed. And the one
• 24:21
  Speaker 3: they have hurt is the one who is struggling. They
• 24:25
  Speaker 3: will marry and even give birth before you.
• 24:29
  Speaker 2: It is life. Life happens. Your enemy is not necessarily
• 24:32
  Speaker 2: God's enemy. Life happens to all of us.
• 24:37
  Speaker 3: The person broke up with you didn't break up with Jesus.
• 24:41
  Speaker 3: If he did the wrong thing just one time in
• 24:43
  Speaker 3: prayer you are forgiven.
• 24:44
  Speaker 2: Moved on. That's why he wants Elo.
• 24:49
  Speaker 3: A merry heart doeth good like medicine but sorrow dries
• 24:54
  Speaker 3: the bone. Some people are no longer looking beautiful and
• 24:57
  Speaker 3: they are looking older than their age because they are
• 24:59
  Speaker 3: carrying too many people in prison.
• 25:01
  Speaker 2: You are block ex plus all the friends of the
• 25:04
  Speaker 2: ex X raised to power three. X raised to power two.
• 25:08
  Speaker 2: The friends, the family, they are all blocked. X raised
• 25:10
  Speaker 2: to power one. The last one. You block the person.
• 25:13
  Speaker 2: Is it until you block the entire world? Because you
• 25:20
  Speaker 2: are hiding your pains. What you do is that you
• 25:24
  Speaker 2: sweep them in a coffin. They will keep resurrecting. Other
• 25:27
  Speaker 2: people will be sharing their pictures and you will be
• 25:29
  Speaker 2: seeing it. And you feel sad. Just recover. Take a break.
• 25:34
  Speaker 2: Take a break. You are not Superman. Okay? Take a break. Cry.
• 25:40
  Speaker 2: It's okay to cry. Cry if you will. Cry.
• 25:45
  Speaker 3: When you are done crying, wipe your tears. Eat some
• 25:47
  Speaker 3: good amala. Eat some very good food with coke.
• 25:55
  Speaker 2: Cold one. Step it down. Okay? Learn from your mistakes.
• 26:02
  Speaker 2: Pick yourself up again. You are a queen. Get up
• 26:04
  Speaker 2: and deal. That's how you do it. Get up and
• 26:07
  Speaker 2: deal again. Don't give people the impression that they are
• 26:10
  Speaker 2: so important you can't find their kind. Heal. Praise God.
• 26:17
  Speaker 2: That's the first thing. Very important thing you need to do. Okay?
• 26:21
  Speaker 3: So we don't have the marriage of broken people who
• 26:24
  Speaker 3: are now dysfunctional and toxic to themselves. Overreaction is a
• 26:30
  Speaker 3: sign that there's an injury.
• 26:34
  Speaker 2: Who do you see when you look at your spouse?
• 26:36
  Speaker 2: Do you see your spouse? Are you aware some people
• 26:38
  Speaker 2: have never seen their spouse before? Let me share my story.
• 26:42
  Speaker 2: Let me share my story. I couldn't really love. In
• 26:48
  Speaker 2: all honesty, I couldn't. I was trying. I would see people...
• 26:56
  Speaker 2: Share pictures.
• 26:57
  Speaker 3: Having, you know, all these fun things.
• 26:59
  Speaker 2: You know what? Those things you do. With guitar, singing.
• 27:02
  Speaker 2: I've been wondering. Is it that this part in my
• 27:05
  Speaker 2: own life is blocked or what?
• 27:07
  Speaker 3: You understand what I'm saying?
• 27:09
  Speaker 2: I don't used to. And one day my friend called me.
• 27:16
  Speaker 2: Early in the morning. And he was shouting. And he
• 27:20
  Speaker 2: had prayed. He was calling my name. Those girls are
• 27:25
  Speaker 2: not so and so and so. Heal.
• 27:27
  Speaker 3: Don't let the devil waste your life. And they were
• 27:29
  Speaker 3: screaming and something left me. And I discovered I was
• 27:32
  Speaker 3: not really seeing them. I was seeing somebody else who
• 27:34
  Speaker 3: had hurt me in them. And sometimes the person who
• 27:38
  Speaker 3: hurts you the most in life, your spouse, sounds like
• 27:39
  Speaker 3: the person.
• 27:43
  Speaker 2: Sounds exactly like the person. Talks like the person. Looks
• 27:46
  Speaker 2: like the person. Imagine what will happen if you don't heal.
• 27:48
  Speaker 2: You will even hate your child for looking like the person.
• 27:54
  Speaker 2: These matters are very deep.
• 27:56
  Speaker 3: There are many people who are smiling and taking pictures
• 27:59
  Speaker 3: online but they are not fine.
• 28:01
  Speaker 2: So good home goes beyond pictures. That's the fact. That's
• 28:06
  Speaker 2: the first thing to do as a lady. Is that okay?
• 28:09
  Speaker 2: Number two. Are you still with me? Can we continue?
• 28:14
  Speaker 2: It is very important that you learn submission. I'm a
• 28:19
  Speaker 2: boss lady. Stay single.
• 28:23
  Speaker 3: Stay single See, stay what? I'm the firstborn in my house.
• 28:28
  Speaker 3: I tell my brothers what to do.
• 28:30
  Speaker 2: He's not your brother. Stay single.
• 28:33
  Speaker 3: Or marry yourself. Frame your picture, tall one, let them
• 28:36
  Speaker 3: chisel it. Then breathe life into it. And marry yourself.
• 28:41
  Speaker 3: Stay single.
• 28:44
  Speaker 2: Now listen to this.
• 28:45
  Speaker 3: Women who do well in marriage are women who understand submission.
• 28:48
  Speaker 3: That is the injunction of the Bible. Ephesians 5 verse 22. Wives,
• 28:52
  Speaker 3: submit yourselves to your husband.
• 28:55
  Speaker 2: So you are not using feminist bible. You are using
• 28:57
  Speaker 2: the holy bible. You say we are going to go dutch.
• 29:01
  Speaker 3: You cook I cook. I am going to talk about
• 29:07
  Speaker 3: all those aspects of marriage. But let me stay with
• 29:09
  Speaker 3: my teaching.
• 29:11
  Speaker 2: Is that ok now?
• 29:12
  Speaker 3: In marriage as a lady you will submit. You see
• 29:16
  Speaker 3: you can be for instance you can be the pastor
• 29:20
  Speaker 3: of your husband. That is you pastor him in church.
• 29:24
  Speaker 3: You are the pastor. Is that okay now?
• 29:28
  Speaker 2: If it comes to this for workers' meeting, you can say, please,
• 29:31
  Speaker 2: all those people that came late, stand up. It's you
• 29:33
  Speaker 2: that know. I'm not there. I'm not saying you should
• 29:36
  Speaker 2: do that. It's you that know. You understand what I'm saying?
• 29:38
  Speaker 2: That's church.
• 29:39
  Speaker 3: It's between you and God and him when you are
• 29:42
  Speaker 3: done doing all those things in church when you get
• 29:45
  Speaker 3: home this is your head you can be the MD
• 29:48
  Speaker 3: the CEO of your company when you get home submit
• 29:52
  Speaker 3: and the reason why women have issues with submission is
• 29:55
  Speaker 3: because they have examples of women who submitted to foolish
• 29:58
  Speaker 3: head So you, too, it is now your duty to
• 30:03
  Speaker 3: pick the head you want to submit to. If you
• 30:06
  Speaker 3: know the person is stupid, why did you marry the person?
• 30:09
  Speaker 3: Do you understand what I'm saying? Now, I've seen cases,
• 30:11
  Speaker 3: and people have abused this issue of submission. And I'm
• 30:15
  Speaker 3: not going to massage anybody's ego. I will tell you
• 30:17
  Speaker 3: the truth as it is. People have abused it so
• 30:20
  Speaker 3: much so that some men will wait for their wives
• 30:22
  Speaker 3: to get salary and say, come and drop it on
• 30:23
  Speaker 3: my table.
• 30:24
  Speaker 2: They will now pick and say, okay, how much is
• 30:26
  Speaker 2: your salary this month? Okay, 550,000, okay. Yeah, take the 50,000
• 30:30
  Speaker 2: on it. That's it. I'm going to get there. Relax. Relax. Relax.
• 30:39
  Speaker 2: Let's just start. Let's continue from here. Is that okay now?
• 30:41
  Speaker 3: You saw the person and you went for the person.
• 30:45
  Speaker 3: When you pick what you want to eat at the table,
• 30:47
  Speaker 3: eat it. It's your responsibility. When we say know the person,
• 30:53
  Speaker 3: you were eating shawarma. Were we there?
• 30:55
  Speaker 2: Were we not where we were? You were the one
• 30:59
  Speaker 2: eating shawarma.
• 31:01
  Speaker 3: Singing, follow me. Now he's doing what he's doing. What
• 31:07
  Speaker 3: he was born to do. What he has been doing since.
• 31:09
  Speaker 3: That you didn't see. Because you were not looking. Just
• 31:13
  Speaker 3: complimenting his beard.
• 31:15
  Speaker 2: Oh wow. They are shining. But the brain is not.
• 31:18
  Speaker 2: Now you can't see that one. I just like you.
• 31:24
  Speaker 2: Look at his chest. Wow. All mine. All mine. Plus
• 31:28
  Speaker 2: the trouble. Plus the sense. Plus the childishness. All yours.
• 31:38
  Speaker 2: And enjoy it, sir. All yours.
• 31:43
  Speaker 3: When people say all mine, they don't know what they
• 31:44
  Speaker 3: are talking about. Do you know what all means?
• 31:49
  Speaker 2: Totality. I own it. To own your trouble.
• 31:55
  Speaker 3: Now, no real man should make a woman go through that.
• 31:59
  Speaker 3: Do you understand what I'm saying? Age does not make
• 32:03
  Speaker 3: a real man. Boys grow old too. Fools grow old too.
• 32:08
  Speaker 2: There are mad old people. There are. It doesn't make
• 32:13
  Speaker 2: you wise.
• 32:14
  Speaker 3: Job said he thought a multitude of age will teach wisdom,
• 32:17
  Speaker 3: but unfortunately it's not so.
• 32:18
  Speaker 2: So I'm getting older. It's not the guarantee that you're
• 32:20
  Speaker 2: ready for marriage.
• 32:22
  Speaker 3: Sometimes a 22-year-old boy is more ready than a 50-year-old man.
• 32:24
  Speaker 2: Sometimes. Sometimes. Don't marry a man raised by a woman.
• 32:30
  Speaker 2: By a woman alone.
• 32:32
  Speaker 3: There must be a masculine contribution in his life. If not,
• 32:35
  Speaker 3: you have married another woman. Sister John.
• 32:39
  Speaker 2: That's who you married. Yes. That's the fact.
• 32:43
  Speaker 3: And let me say this to you. I'm going to
• 32:45
  Speaker 3: pull out. I want to be a single mama. You
• 32:46
  Speaker 3: will hate your children. I'm going to talk about grants
• 32:50
  Speaker 3: for divorce and separation.
• 32:51
  Speaker 2: We are going to get there. So you don't marry
• 32:53
  Speaker 2: a person that will kill you and die. So let's
• 32:56
  Speaker 2: be balanced. You guys okay now? Uh-huh. There are men
• 33:00
  Speaker 2: who are more women than women. The only thing remains
• 33:04
  Speaker 2: that they are not painting fingernails. Inside is Bob Risky. Inside.
• 33:10
  Speaker 2: I'm telling you. Sister. Sister and you. They are petty.
• 33:18
  Speaker 2: They will check the meat you are eating. What kind
• 33:20
  Speaker 2: of meat is that? What kind of meat is that?
• 33:23
  Speaker 2: Is this a man? How much did I give you
• 33:32
  Speaker 2: to the market? I gave you 50,000. What did you buy?
• 33:35
  Speaker 2: Bring book. Come on, start explaining. In your calculation, $ 200
• 33:40
  Speaker 2: is missing. How do you say you take back? Child. Wahala.
• 33:48
  Speaker 2: But you married this fellow, true? Ah. I don't want to.
• 33:58
  Speaker 2: Because I don't. I'm just saying my own. Do you
• 34:05
  Speaker 2: understand what I'm saying? You were there. When you put
• 34:09
  Speaker 2: 200 in your Bible. Take it to church.
• 34:13
  Speaker 3: Collect change.
• 34:14
  Speaker 2: After I give you 150. You were there. You say
• 34:18
  Speaker 2: it's just meticulous. It's just meticulous. That's its nature. It's
• 34:24
  Speaker 2: just meticulous. That's his nature.
• 34:27
  Speaker 3: He's a meticulous guy. Till you almost start counting rice.
• 34:32
  Speaker 3: He's meticulous.
• 34:36
  Speaker 2: Number three.
• 34:38
  Speaker 3: As a woman, be financially independent. His husband you want,
• 34:44
  Speaker 3: not sponsor. A man too should learn to give and
• 34:48
  Speaker 3: provide for his household. But for the sake of your esteem,
• 34:52
  Speaker 3: have your own money. Do you understand what I'm saying?
• 34:56
  Speaker 3: You don't want to be asking for money for pants,
• 34:58
  Speaker 3: for bra, for all those things.
• 35:00
  Speaker 2: Have your own money. So that you will not have
• 35:03
  Speaker 2: children who don't pray to be like you. Have your money. Now,
• 35:08
  Speaker 2: financial independence is a lot for a woman. I wish
• 35:13
  Speaker 2: I could touch the depth of this.
• 35:18
  Speaker 3: At least, let your hand find something doing. Even if
• 35:23
  Speaker 3: you will have to work from home for.
• 35:25
  Speaker 2: The sake of raising children. Whatsoever it is that the
• 35:29
  Speaker 2: agreement is. Is that okay now?
• 35:31
  Speaker 3: However little it is. Be the kind of woman that
• 35:35
  Speaker 3: your husband can fall back on. I will not say
• 35:38
  Speaker 3: I don't have all the time. Now let me show
• 35:39
  Speaker 3: you a scripture.
• 35:40
  Speaker 2: Proverbs 31. Proverbs chapter number 31. And I'm going to
• 35:47
  Speaker 2: tell you some very hard facts. Now look at it.
• 35:49
  Speaker 3: Proverbs chapter number 31. Let's start reading from verse 10.
• 35:53
  Speaker 3: Proverbs 31 from verse 10 says, Who can find a
• 35:56
  Speaker 3: virtuous woman... For her price is far above rubies. The
• 36:00
  Speaker 3: heart of her husband doth safely trust her. So that
• 36:04
  Speaker 3: he shall have no need of spoil. She will do
• 36:07
  Speaker 3: him good and not evil all the days of her life.
• 36:11
  Speaker 3: She seeketh wool and flask.
• 36:13
  Speaker 2: And walketh willingly with her hands.
• 36:16
  Speaker 4: Willingly.
• 36:18
  Speaker 2: Not the one that will push. She go and walk.
• 36:20
  Speaker 3: Willingly with her hands. She's like the merchant's sheep. She
• 36:25
  Speaker 3: bringeth her food from afar. She riseth also while it
• 36:27
  Speaker 3: is yet night, and giveth me to her husband, to
• 36:29
  Speaker 3: her household, and a portion to her maidens. She considereth
• 36:34
  Speaker 3: a field and buys it with the foot of her hands.
• 36:37
  Speaker 3: She planted a vineyard. She greeted her loins with strength
• 36:43
  Speaker 3: and strengthened her hands. Now let me say this to you.
• 36:45
  Speaker 3: It doesn't matter how we want to push it and
• 36:47
  Speaker 3: push it. You will not really have the full honor
• 36:49
  Speaker 3: you should have from your spouse if you are not
• 36:50
  Speaker 3: making your own money.
• 36:52
  Speaker 2: That's the fact. Real men are gravitated towards women who
• 36:57
  Speaker 2: are productive. That's the fact. When a woman is doing something,
• 37:01
  Speaker 2: does her own stuff. Man looks at her and says, yes, correct. Interesting.
• 37:06
  Speaker 2: That's who I married. That's who I married. Okay?
• 37:14
  Speaker 3: Is that simple enough? Tell the woman beside you, say,
• 37:16
  Speaker 3: make your own money. Come on, come on, come on.
• 37:20
  Speaker 2: Say it again, say it again. Be financially independent. It
• 37:26
  Speaker 2: doesn't matter how little it is.
• 37:29
  Speaker 3: And this financial dependency starts with the issue of small gear,
• 37:33
  Speaker 3: big God.
• 37:35
  Speaker 2: Small gear, big God. Sub me. Two gig. Sub for me.
• 37:43
  Speaker 3: I can't pick your video call because I don't have sub.
• 37:48
  Speaker 2: Sub. Every time, no sub. Sub. What are you bringing
• 37:54
  Speaker 2: to the table? Say me. Total speck.
• 37:57
  Speaker 3: Speck of what? Speck of dust or what? Full speck
• 38:01
  Speaker 3: like me. What is this speck bringing to the table?
• 38:04
  Speaker 3: We need to address this matter. What is this speck
• 38:07
  Speaker 3: bringing to the table?
• 38:10
  Speaker 2: Say full speck. To carry front. Carry back. It's money
• 38:15
  Speaker 2: that will maintain it. I say, is it not money? Ah.
• 38:22
  Speaker 2: His money sir. That's the fact.
• 38:28
  Speaker 3: That's the fact. That's the fact. When I get back
• 38:32
  Speaker 3: to the house. And my wife has bought something for me.
• 38:35
  Speaker 3: I'm like my God.
• 38:37
  Speaker 2: Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. When every month. Comes
• 38:45
  Speaker 2: to give me prophet seed. Say. I want to honor
• 38:49
  Speaker 2: you every month. From the things we are doing and
• 38:51
  Speaker 2: all that. Wow. Wow. Correct. Kneel down.
• 38:54
  Speaker 3: Let me bless you. That's the fact. You feel that's it.
• 38:59
  Speaker 3: That's the way it should be. Not give me, give me,
• 39:01
  Speaker 3: give me, give me. You two get tired. Government is
• 39:04
  Speaker 3: asking for tax. Families are asking for money. Children are
• 39:08
  Speaker 3: asking for money. You two give me, give me. What
• 39:10
  Speaker 3: do you want to bring to the table? The hand
• 39:12
  Speaker 3: that is not working should not eat. If you don't
• 39:15
  Speaker 3: have a job, what you need is not marriage.
• 39:17
  Speaker 2: It's work. First. True? Say, what's your plan for the
• 39:21
  Speaker 2: next three years? Just marry. Ask what? Say, what's your
• 39:25
  Speaker 2: financial plan? Marriage.
• 39:31
  Speaker 3: And the problem is that the guy too is too
• 39:33
  Speaker 3: blind to say it. He's too blind. They didn't teach
• 39:37
  Speaker 3: him to be a real man. To tell her that,
• 39:39
  Speaker 3: do you know you can walk? Do you know it's
• 39:41
  Speaker 3: good for you to walk? He won't say it. He
• 39:45
  Speaker 3: won't say it. And when he gets to the marriage,
• 39:47
  Speaker 3: he'll start reacting. But he won't say it.
• 39:50
  Speaker 2: That's why you must pull down these veils of lies and.
• 39:53
  Speaker 3: Deceit while you are dating. Tell yourselves the truth. What
• 39:56
  Speaker 3: you don't like about each other. See, the last time
• 40:00
  Speaker 3: when you came close to me, I don't like the
• 40:02
  Speaker 3: way your mouth was smelling. There's no polite way to
• 40:04
  Speaker 3: say your mouth smells. Either way, it's painful. Just say it.
• 40:11
  Speaker 3: That's why you must be friends.
• 40:17
  Speaker 2: Your friend. That's your friend. Not say, you know, man
• 40:21
  Speaker 2: of God. Any relationship where you can't talk freely is
• 40:24
  Speaker 2: abusive already. It's abusive already. You understand what I'm saying?
• 40:30
  Speaker 2: When they raise hand to say amen, you know what comes.
• 40:34
  Speaker 2: I say, guy, what's happening? You know what you're saying?
• 40:40
  Speaker 2: That's friends talking. You will change.
• 40:43
  Speaker 3: Not like she's packaging and saying, actually, you know, um,
• 40:48
  Speaker 3: Have you seen Genesis 27 verse 27?
• 40:52
  Speaker 2: Isaac said to Jacob, he said, the smell of my son. Nonsense. Nonsense. Nonsense. Nonsense.
• 41:06
  Speaker 2: Marry your friend.
• 41:08
  Speaker 3: See, all this way we are trying to spiritualize and
• 41:11
  Speaker 3: say friendship is not important.
• 41:13
  Speaker 2: The way to come.
• 41:14
  Speaker 3: Back and haunt us. The way to come back and
• 41:16
  Speaker 3: haunt us. Two people are in the home, it looks
• 41:19
  Speaker 3: like it's mortuary. They can't talk. They are not laughing.
• 41:23
  Speaker 3: What is keeping them is the contract of marriage. I'm
• 41:27
  Speaker 3: going to talk to that issue.
• 41:29
  Speaker 2: It's a very serious matter. Because they were never talking.
• 41:33
  Speaker 3: They just wanted to marry each other. No compatibility in sense.
• 41:38
  Speaker 3: There is sense compatibility. When you talk, a person can
• 41:41
  Speaker 3: carry it from there. Not like it's always dropping. Say,
• 41:45
  Speaker 3: have you seen what's happening on Twitter? Have you seen
• 41:47
  Speaker 3: what's trending?
• 41:48
  Speaker 2: Say, three what? What's Twitter? Say, ah, okay. The case
• 41:53
  Speaker 2: of Chicago University. Chicago? Are you from Chicago? Okay, another
• 42:00
  Speaker 2: day you bring this one again. They say, huh? Dissimilar interest.
• 42:06
  Speaker 2: This one is not even about dissimilar interest. This one
• 42:08
  Speaker 2: is that. This person is not even in your intellectual space.
• 42:14
  Speaker 2: No content. No But we keep ignoring it. Till there
• 42:24
  Speaker 2: is nowhere to go. We must deal with this fact.
• 42:28
  Speaker 2: And let's normalize breakup. It happens. It happens. If people
• 42:34
  Speaker 2: can't walk and they separate. Leave them alone.
• 42:35
  Speaker 3: They will meet their size. Not that we make breakup
• 42:40
  Speaker 3: look unfortunate. People are now trying to push it. For
• 42:44
  Speaker 3: sake of what people say. People who talk and move on.
• 42:47
  Speaker 3: Michael Jackson is dead.
• 42:47
  Speaker 2: They talk. They forgot him. Praise God. Am I making sense?
• 42:57
  Speaker 2: Some spiritual sense? Are you sure? Are you really sure?
• 43:02
  Speaker 2: Number what now? Number four.
• 43:04
  Speaker 3: Now, learn basic home keeping knowledge. Have some basic home
• 43:10
  Speaker 3: keeping knowledge.
• 43:11
  Speaker 2: Hey, I can't, I can't touch. Look at your baby
• 43:13
  Speaker 2: has poo. I can't touch the pampas. Something is wrong
• 43:17
  Speaker 2: with you there. Something. I say you want to get married.
• 43:22
  Speaker 2: We should make you go and do IT in motherless
• 43:24
  Speaker 2: baby home for two months. You will have children that
• 43:28
  Speaker 2: will poo. I can't cook rice. You boil water, it
• 43:36
  Speaker 2: will burn. They will beg you. The kettle now has oil.
• 43:42
  Speaker 2: Because just when you put things on fire, that's when
• 43:45
  Speaker 2: you sleep. Every time, burn your friend. Make dollar fries.
• 43:50
  Speaker 2: We will be eating Maggi Every time.
• 43:56
  Speaker 3: Say, you know, actually in our home, we are a
• 43:57
  Speaker 3: product of nature and nurture.
• 44:00
  Speaker 2: You can nurture yourself.
• 44:01
  Speaker 3: And I've said the balance is that anybody who knows
• 44:03
  Speaker 3: how to eat what is sweet should know how to
• 44:05
  Speaker 3: cook it. Do you understand what I'm saying? There are
• 44:10
  Speaker 3: some basic knowledge on how to keep a home. There's
• 44:16
  Speaker 3: no how we want to say, this is a new world.
• 44:19
  Speaker 3: Women are the ones who keep home.
• 44:22
  Speaker 2: True or not true? If you get to a house
• 44:24
  Speaker 2: and the home is dirty, who do you look at?
• 44:26
  Speaker 2: The woman. Everywhere is smelling. Who do you check? The woman.
• 44:32
  Speaker 2: And some women are dirty, sir. Very dirty. It's your fault.
• 44:40
  Speaker 2: Because when you were dating and you do video call,
• 44:42
  Speaker 2: you see... You say it's... Whatever you call it. That's
• 44:48
  Speaker 2: the way she is early in the morning.
• 44:51
  Speaker 3: And you notice that... 4 p.m., it's still like that.
• 44:56
  Speaker 3: 6 p.m., it's still like that.
• 44:59
  Speaker 2: What's happening?
• 45:01
  Speaker 3: She will carry it over to the following day. See,
• 45:08
  Speaker 3: she just likes to be free.
• 45:10
  Speaker 2: Wow. What an interesting way to be free.
• 45:15
  Speaker 3: We are trying to bastardize what is right because of
• 45:19
  Speaker 3: unhealthy exposures.
• 45:21
  Speaker 2: Internet age.
• 45:22
  Speaker 3: And many of those people who are pushing young girls
• 45:25
  Speaker 3: to be insubordinate, they are humble in their own homes.
• 45:29
  Speaker 3: One major feminist got married. Some girls were whipping on Twitter.
• 45:34
  Speaker 3: Now she sent you. She had bastardized tradition. On her
• 45:39
  Speaker 3: own wedding day, she was on her knees giving the
• 45:41
  Speaker 3: husband pamoy. And she has bastardized other girls. She said,
• 45:45
  Speaker 3: I can't even do it.
• 45:46
  Speaker 2: I can't. And they saw the picture. She's doing it.
• 45:51
  Speaker 2: Who lose? Nobody you know follow who says? You follow
• 45:58
  Speaker 2: and follow and enter the ditch. Now listen to this.
• 46:00
  Speaker 3: All this mob followership is low self-esteem. You only pick
• 46:04
  Speaker 3: your esteem in the midst of crowd. When you agree
• 46:07
  Speaker 3: what they are saying. Some women should not be married sir.
• 46:10
  Speaker 3: Because anybody who marry them will suffer. His fast food
• 46:13
  Speaker 3: he will eat, he will die. When they go to
• 46:17
  Speaker 3: the market, there is no dues they will buy.
• 46:20
  Speaker 2: No dues. Every time, no juice. No juice. No juice.
• 46:30
  Speaker 3: You say, you complain. Change it to no juice. You say, honey,
• 46:38
  Speaker 3: I'm dying. She will change it to what? But she's
• 46:41
  Speaker 3: moving from super pack to onion flavor to no juice.
• 46:47
  Speaker 3: Because that's what she knows how to cook. It is
• 46:54
  Speaker 3: wickedness not to be able to cook for your spouse.
• 46:57
  Speaker 2: It is wickedness. And we are seeing you from your
• 46:59
  Speaker 2: single days now. We are seeing you.
• 47:03
  Speaker 3: We are seeing you. Can you make jollof rice? Now
• 47:07
  Speaker 3: let's say this pastor is petty, but that's the fact.
• 47:09
  Speaker 3: It's not wood your husband will eat now. And you
• 47:12
  Speaker 3: too will eat now.
• 47:13
  Speaker 2: True or not true?
• 47:14
  Speaker 3: Ladies, you are quiet. We are just getting started. I
• 47:20
  Speaker 3: shared this story with my cousin with you. That made
• 47:23
  Speaker 3: a bar for his father. I wasn't there. I didn't
• 47:30
  Speaker 3: know what transpired. But I met a scene. Where the
• 47:33
  Speaker 3: father said. Kneel down there.
• 47:36
  Speaker 2: And the father sat down across the room. He was
• 47:38
  Speaker 2: molding the bar. He said is this the bar you
• 47:40
  Speaker 2: made for your father? He said yes.
• 47:42
  Speaker 3: He said so this is what is going to happen.
• 47:44
  Speaker 3: I will roll this bar. If I stone your head
• 47:48
  Speaker 3: with it.
• 47:49
  Speaker 2: If it sticks. You are a wicked boy. It is
• 47:51
  Speaker 2: too soft. It is too soft. She said, boy, if
• 47:53
  Speaker 2: the heba should come and fall back, you are an idiot.
• 47:56
  Speaker 2: You want to kill me. And I was watching, and
• 48:01
  Speaker 2: he rolled the heba. And whiffed it to the boy.
• 48:03
  Speaker 2: He cut my boy's head, fell the heart. This is stone.
• 48:10
  Speaker 2: This is stone.
• 48:11
  Speaker 3: That girl you are dating, you are watching how that,
• 48:14
  Speaker 3: when she carries a child in church, and the child
• 48:17
  Speaker 3: you relate to, you are watching all those things. She
• 48:21
  Speaker 3: is just quintessential. She's not only, she's acting like she
• 48:34
  Speaker 3: was not brought up from any family. Like there's no
• 48:37
  Speaker 3: hell of any traditional upbringing. Meanwhile, she ate her poo
• 48:40
  Speaker 3: in her room while she pretends. Are you following what
• 48:44
  Speaker 3: I'm saying here?
• 48:46
  Speaker 2: Have this knowledge. Ma, I don't kill you. You are
• 48:49
  Speaker 2: a mother. You are a mother. I shared this story
• 48:57
  Speaker 2: with you before. We're in part one. There's this hostel
• 49:01
  Speaker 2: beside the church. People used to complain. Every time the
• 49:04
  Speaker 2: hostel is smelling. Every time. What is happening? They will
• 49:10
  Speaker 2: clear everywhere. One night it will be smelling again.
• 49:13
  Speaker 3: The following morning. They said we are going to find
• 49:16
  Speaker 3: out what is happening. So they suspected a girl. Only
• 49:22
  Speaker 3: for them to wait till around past 11. She was
• 49:25
  Speaker 3: coming out of her room, trying to drum something with
• 49:27
  Speaker 3: the dustbin.
• 49:28
  Speaker 2: They said, hold on. Hold it. This girl is so fine.
• 49:34
  Speaker 2: So fine. If you don't have the Holy Ghost intact,
• 49:38
  Speaker 2: you will look three times. very very fine hey don't
• 49:43
  Speaker 2: wait hold on hold on touch light oh yeah open
• 49:47
  Speaker 2: what you want.
• 49:48
  Speaker 3: To throw inside real life story you know what she
• 49:52
  Speaker 3: was doing to throw inside feces she will pull in
• 49:56
  Speaker 3: her own room.
• 49:58
  Speaker 2: Inside a nylon it's gross and drop it in the
• 50:02
  Speaker 2: dustbin in the center of the hostel I just like
• 50:08
  Speaker 2: her like that cholera vibrocholery.
• 50:24
  Speaker 3: There are forms of dirtiness that can be managed we
• 50:27
  Speaker 3: can adjust this person but there are some that is
• 50:30
  Speaker 3: dead to anybody that marries this person you will die do.
• 50:37
  Speaker 2: You understand what I'm saying fact pot of rice.
• 50:40
  Speaker 4: Will be stored being stored warm everywhere everywhere smelling but
• 50:49
  Speaker 4: she's speaking in tongues say that's enough for me.
• 50:53
  Speaker 3: Say she prays and I love it like that that's
• 50:56
  Speaker 3: more than enough praise God these are serious matters be
• 51:03
  Speaker 3: a homekeeper forget about being woke Be at home. Now ladies,
• 51:10
  Speaker 3: you are quiet. Praise God.
• 51:13
  Speaker 2: You still love me, shall I give you a big amen?
• 51:17
  Speaker 2: That's the fact. Number five. Maybe I'm going to stop
• 51:27
  Speaker 2: at number five. It's ten. Then I will also do
• 51:30
  Speaker 2: five for male. Is that okay? Then we continue from here.
• 51:34
  Speaker 2: Is that okay? Alright. Alright. Number five, know God. Know God.
• 51:44
  Speaker 3: Now listen, there are challenges that faces home. That if
• 51:50
  Speaker 3: it meet a woman who doesn't know the way to
• 51:52
  Speaker 3: her knees in prayer.
• 51:53
  Speaker 2: The home will scatter. The home will scatter.
• 51:58
  Speaker 3: And many people fight their husband. They should both be
• 52:02
  Speaker 3: fighting the devil. Because they don't know the way of prayer. Now,
• 52:08
  Speaker 3: You must understand this. The devil knows that one of
• 52:11
  Speaker 3: the ways to destroy and attack the life of your
• 52:19
  Speaker 3: children is to attack the home. So there must be
• 52:25
  Speaker 3: a woman who have an understanding of what prayer is.
• 52:30
  Speaker 3: Who can cover the children in prayer. Who can also
• 52:34
  Speaker 3: cover the husband in prayer. The one who understands that.
• 52:37
  Speaker 3: Go and read the book, The Power of a Praying Wife.
• 52:42
  Speaker 3: The one who can get up in the middle of
• 52:43
  Speaker 3: the night and speak to God about our home, about
• 52:48
  Speaker 3: our husband, about ourselves. There are things that are happening
• 52:53
  Speaker 3: that this is outrightly the devil trying to invade that
• 52:56
  Speaker 3: home to destroy it and make a mess of that marriage.
• 53:00
  Speaker 2: And the solution to this is not fight.
• 53:03
  Speaker 3: The solution, in fact, it will be a trap to confront.
• 53:07
  Speaker 3: you must first pull down the stronghold of the enemy
• 53:10
  Speaker 3: and then terminate every seed he has planted. Because sometimes
• 53:14
  Speaker 3: the matter is deeper than you can think. And you
• 53:16
  Speaker 3: only attack it emotionally on the surface. You have no
• 53:19
  Speaker 3: idea what you are dealing with. And all these things
• 53:23
  Speaker 3: about people not praying, just feeling we're going to get... No,
• 53:26
  Speaker 3: you won't be fine if you are not praying.
• 53:28
  Speaker 2: You won't. You won't. You must understand that. I wish
• 53:35
  Speaker 2: either of Ananias and Sapphira was a prayer warrior.
• 53:38
  Speaker 3: Would have been able to guide themselves. Just one person
• 53:41
  Speaker 3: getting it right will help the two of them to
• 53:43
  Speaker 3: stay alive. We must understand that. As a woman, you
• 53:48
  Speaker 3: want to keep a home. You want to get married.
• 53:50
  Speaker 3: Do you know how to pray?
• 53:51
  Speaker 2: Do you know how to pour your heart to God?
• 53:55
  Speaker 3: Are you aware that there are things you talk and
• 53:57
  Speaker 3: shout about that nothing will happen?
• 54:00
  Speaker 2: But if you talk to God, who is his father
• 54:01
  Speaker 2: about it? God will touch his heart.
• 54:04
  Speaker 3: And sometimes you may never even have to bring up
• 54:06
  Speaker 3: with him.
• 54:07
  Speaker 2: God will just touch the earth. And it has happened
• 54:09
  Speaker 2: with myself and my wife. Several times. You all say
• 54:12
  Speaker 2: she has cried to God about a matter that I'm
• 54:14
  Speaker 2: just discussing. Ah, I don't know. Every man has ego.
• 54:24
  Speaker 2: That's the truth.
• 54:25
  Speaker 3: Every man has ego. That ego is not for dominating
• 54:29
  Speaker 3: the wife. It is for you to conquer your world.
• 54:33
  Speaker 3: That's the way man is wired. I was counseling the
• 54:37
  Speaker 3: couple and the woman was sharing, say, when I talk
• 54:39
  Speaker 3: to my husband, talk to her there, he would just say, wow.
• 54:42
  Speaker 2: I said, I can't counsel you. It was me too,
• 54:44
  Speaker 2: I'm like that. That's the way men are. Because he's
• 54:49
  Speaker 2: thinking about many things.
• 54:52
  Speaker 3: You put it in the hands of God. God, this
• 54:56
  Speaker 3: your son that you gave me is ultimate. But be
• 55:00
  Speaker 3: sure you can say, God, the one you gave me
• 55:04
  Speaker 3: Not the one I got for myself. The one you
• 55:08
  Speaker 3: gave me. This is happening, Lord. I remember there was
• 55:14
  Speaker 3: a time I was facing a very serious challenge. Very
• 55:18
  Speaker 3: serious challenge. And my wife said, this, this, this. And
• 55:22
  Speaker 3: I would watch her. I mean, I couldn't keep some
• 55:24
  Speaker 3: of my routine around that season. I'm just being honest
• 55:26
  Speaker 3: with you. And I would watch her at night, get
• 55:29
  Speaker 3: up in the middle of the night and cry and
• 55:30
  Speaker 3: cry to God. I would watch her and her friends.
• 55:33
  Speaker 3: She had some friends. That they will be over the
• 55:35
  Speaker 3: phone praying for their husband. How do you think you
• 55:37
  Speaker 3: will feel as a man like that? You will be excited.
• 55:42
  Speaker 3: Fine girl, fine girl, when will you pray? The man
• 55:44
  Speaker 3: will soon tire.
• 55:44
  Speaker 2: He will be worried.
• 55:46
  Speaker 3: Do you understand what I am saying? That is what
• 55:48
  Speaker 3: I am asking. Apart from being fine, what else are
• 55:51
  Speaker 3: you bringing to the table? Can your children be getting
• 55:53
  Speaker 3: it right in school because there is a mother praying?
• 55:58
  Speaker 2: Can you fast a day for your home? Can you?
• 56:03
  Speaker 3: Do you know what the Bible says? Are you a
• 56:05
  Speaker 3: true Christian? Do you even have a study life? Some
• 56:10
  Speaker 3: men have never seen their wife read the Bible once
• 56:13
  Speaker 3: and they've been married for seven years. She's never read
• 56:16
  Speaker 3: it once. If your spouse has never seen you reading
• 56:18
  Speaker 3: the Bible, you don't have a study life.
• 56:20
  Speaker 2: Period. If your spouse has never seen you praying, you
• 56:23
  Speaker 2: don't have a prayer life. There's no such thing. I
• 56:26
  Speaker 2: have my own secret fire. You have no fire. If
• 56:30
  Speaker 2: you pray, everybody will pray. Check. Any home that the
• 56:33
  Speaker 2: man prays, everybody will be praying. Any home that the
• 56:37
  Speaker 2: man studies, everybody will be studying. Do you understand what
• 56:39
  Speaker 2: I'm saying?
• 56:40
  Speaker 3: If the woman does it, everybody will do it. We
• 56:46
  Speaker 3: have people who are lying in church. They have no
• 56:48
  Speaker 3: prayer and study life. You will marry them to find out.
• 56:53
  Speaker 2: They are lying. As the year began, I have my
• 56:55
  Speaker 2: own study plan that I must cover personally. Study plan.
• 57:08
  Speaker 2: Study plan, guys.
• 57:11
  Speaker 3: Let's leave that a bit and go to practical things
• 57:15
  Speaker 3: men need to put in place for marrying.
• 57:18
  Speaker 2: Are you ready, guys? I'm one of your kind. Say amen.
• 57:24
  Speaker 2: We are together. Number one, sincerely, heal also.
• 57:36
  Speaker 3: Men don't look like people carrying emotional baggages, but men
• 57:40
  Speaker 3: do carry.
• 57:46
  Speaker 2: Many men are just masculinizing it and they are just trying.
• 57:51
  Speaker 3: To pull through and look strong, but they are bleeding inside.
• 57:56
  Speaker 3: An average man has been raised not to cry, not
• 57:59
  Speaker 3: to be soft, not to be weak, because they said
• 58:03
  Speaker 3: real men don't cry.
• 58:04
  Speaker 2: Not to talk. Not to talk. And you find out
• 58:06
  Speaker 2: that men die out. You find more grandmas, few grandpas.
• 58:09
  Speaker 2: Because they carry their pain and develop sicknesses. Carrying many fears.
• 58:18
  Speaker 3: If you want to talk to a man and you
• 58:20
  Speaker 3: don't know what to talk to him about, talk to
• 58:23
  Speaker 3: him about his fears. Men have fears. Fears they've been
• 58:28
  Speaker 3: raised not to show. Fears they've been raised not Not
• 58:35
  Speaker 3: to give anybody an impression that it is there. Some
• 58:39
  Speaker 3: men have been abused too. Abused by some girls. Who
• 58:45
  Speaker 3: never understood them. Who caused that their future. Abused by stepmothers.
• 58:51
  Speaker 3: Abused by. Even people. There are women who take advantage
• 58:55
  Speaker 3: of men. And there are cases that. People's own mothers.
• 59:00
  Speaker 3: Take advantage of them for years. Childhood trauma. The loads,
• 59:06
  Speaker 3: the weight that has affected the way you see and
• 59:09
  Speaker 3: perceive women. One of the ways you know a man
• 59:11
  Speaker 3: needs help emotionally is that he doesn't know what else
• 59:14
  Speaker 3: to do with.
• 59:15
  Speaker 2: A woman apart from sleeping with her.
• 59:20
  Speaker 3: Being only sexually attracted to women is a sign that
• 59:23
  Speaker 3: you need help emotionally.
• 59:26
  Speaker 2: What that means is that you don't know how else
• 59:28
  Speaker 2: to love if not touching.
• 59:35
  Speaker 3: An emotionally healthy man knows the ways to love a
• 59:38
  Speaker 3: woman without defiling her. Touching and wanting to just go
• 59:42
  Speaker 3: from 0 to 100 is a sign. He doesn't know
• 59:45
  Speaker 3: what to do. He doesn't know how to love. That
• 59:50
  Speaker 3: is the only way he thinks he can love. Somebody
• 59:54
  Speaker 3: needs to stop him. Dig into his story. Understand where
• 59:59
  Speaker 3: it's coming from. What has destroyed your love life? That
• 1:00:04
  Speaker 3: you can no longer love genuinely and talk and talk
• 1:00:10
  Speaker 3: without touching. What has killed all other expressions that the
• 1:00:13
  Speaker 3: only expression you now know is sex. That thing needs
• 1:00:18
  Speaker 3: to be healed. Sometimes it's not just a weakness first.
• 1:00:22
  Speaker 3: It is a product of a trauma. Not coming from
• 1:00:27
  Speaker 3: home Where love has been mirrored and displayed. And there
• 1:00:32
  Speaker 3: has been addiction. From a tender age. The ways he
• 1:00:37
  Speaker 3: has survived his worries. Is to lock himself up. And
• 1:00:41
  Speaker 3: release himself out. And he feels confident.
• 1:00:47
  Speaker 2: Again. Like he can conquer the world. Comes out. And
• 1:00:52
  Speaker 2: every time he goes through pain. Instead of getting over them.
• 1:00:57
  Speaker 3: He just finds a way to use those addictions as
• 1:00:59
  Speaker 3: toys to get himself over.
• 1:01:02
  Speaker 2: He needs help.
• 1:01:04
  Speaker 3: And it is wrong for a woman to think she
• 1:01:06
  Speaker 3: was designed to satisfy a man sexually that she's not
• 1:01:09
  Speaker 3: married to.
• 1:01:11
  Speaker 2: Say he wants it, so I want to give him.
• 1:01:12
  Speaker 2: He wants what? He's not fine. He's not fine.
• 1:01:18
  Speaker 3: And we need someone that can tell our boys this.
• 1:01:20
  Speaker 3: There are ways to love a woman. A real man
• 1:01:23
  Speaker 3: loves a woman without defiling her. And unfortunately many people
• 1:01:30
  Speaker 3: never had parents who modeled such character and depth of integrity.
• 1:01:36
  Speaker 3: So you are a man but you have no image
• 1:01:38
  Speaker 3: in your life of what a man should be. No
• 1:01:43
  Speaker 3: one around has mirrored what a true man should be.
• 1:01:46
  Speaker 3: And you must understand the devil fights masculinity. That's why
• 1:01:50
  Speaker 3: he's breaking the testicles of men. They want to become women.
• 1:01:55
  Speaker 2: Enlarging their hips. What's happening to our boys? Walking like girls.
• 1:02:00
  Speaker 2: What was happening? It's destroying the mindset. Boys on heels.
• 1:02:07
  Speaker 2: Boys painting nails. Lipstick. Wig. What died in them? No
• 1:02:16
  Speaker 2: figure of a real man.
• 1:02:19
  Speaker 3: Now, the reason why we must pay attention to the
• 1:02:21
  Speaker 3: ministry to men is because real men.
• 1:02:26
  Speaker 2: Are old men. And old men are scarce. Real men
• 1:02:33
  Speaker 2: are old men. And old men are scarce.
• 1:02:39
  Speaker 3: Permit me to tell you as a guy, it's okay
• 1:02:40
  Speaker 3: to cry. Because you are human. Release your emotions when
• 1:02:45
  Speaker 3: you have to. Learn to converse, communicate with your wife.
• 1:02:49
  Speaker 3: Many men would have survived if only they talked to
• 1:02:51
  Speaker 3: their wife about the things they were quiet about. A
• 1:02:55
  Speaker 3: woman is wired to help you. She's the only one
• 1:02:59
  Speaker 3: that shares the name of the Holy Spirit with you.
• 1:03:02
  Speaker 2: That's a wiring. Something is happening to you and all that.
• 1:03:06
  Speaker 2: Tell her.
• 1:03:08
  Speaker 3: And you must learn to communicate. You are not a
• 1:03:10
  Speaker 3: wimp for speaking up. So we feel women go through
• 1:03:14
  Speaker 3: a lot.
• 1:03:14
  Speaker 2: But check.
• 1:03:15
  Speaker 3: More men commit suicide than women. That tells us that
• 1:03:23
  Speaker 3: when we want to deal with the subject of mental
• 1:03:25
  Speaker 3: health and rescue people, you should face the man more
• 1:03:28
  Speaker 3: in his help. But it doesn't look like it. He smiles, dances.
• 1:03:33
  Speaker 3: Then you hear after service, he's killed himself. For a
• 1:03:37
  Speaker 3: woman who'd sit, you know how to help her.
• 1:03:40
  Speaker 2: She will cry. But for him, he'll laugh. Even in
• 1:03:43
  Speaker 2: the final moment, just say, are you good? I'm okay, bro.
• 1:03:47
  Speaker 3: But he's made up his mind. When you want to talk,
• 1:03:53
  Speaker 3: and let me talk to a woman a few, just
• 1:03:56
  Speaker 3: a bit. When you want to deal with a man
• 1:03:59
  Speaker 3: in his entirety, you must be deep. When you want
• 1:04:03
  Speaker 3: to really deal with a man, don't stay on the surface.
• 1:04:06
  Speaker 2: You have to be a deep girl. Is that okay?
• 1:04:09
  Speaker 3: You guys are lost. I said, is that okay now?
• 1:04:13
  Speaker 3: But these are real matters. These are real matters. He's
• 1:04:21
  Speaker 3: not communicating. He's not talking. He is in his mind.
• 1:04:24
  Speaker 3: He needs help to speak up. There's an orientation that
• 1:04:31
  Speaker 3: he's been wired with. And that's why, listen to this,
• 1:04:38
  Speaker 3: most men are forever glued with women who look like
• 1:04:43
  Speaker 3: mother figures. Because it is the duty of a mother
• 1:04:48
  Speaker 3: to birth true care. It looks so hard. It doesn't
• 1:04:53
  Speaker 3: look like a response to compliment and all that. But
• 1:04:55
  Speaker 3: it means a lot. If you are not saying it,
• 1:04:58
  Speaker 3: his ego is dying. And when you say it, He
• 1:05:02
  Speaker 3: doesn't want to give the impression that it's something to do.
• 1:05:05
  Speaker 2: I'm proud of you. Say thank you. Thank you. Thank you.
• 1:05:10
  Speaker 3: But if you don't say it, he feels it. He
• 1:05:12
  Speaker 3: hears somebody else telling the spouse, which wife is he
• 1:05:14
  Speaker 3: not telling me?
• 1:05:17
  Speaker 2: Heal. Heal from your past. Heal from your ex. Heal
• 1:05:21
  Speaker 2: from your trauma. Each time you catch yourself behaving like
• 1:05:25
  Speaker 2: your dad, you are hungry. Heal from him.
• 1:05:30
  Speaker 1: Heal.
• 1:05:32
  Speaker 2: One of the ways you know you have healed is
• 1:05:33
  Speaker 2: that you can relate. So man needs healing too.
• 1:05:44
  Speaker 3: You walk, you make money, you provide for everyone, you
• 1:05:50
  Speaker 3: send money to this, send money to that, give money
• 1:05:52
  Speaker 3: to this, give money to that.
• 1:05:54
  Speaker 2: But you are neglecting yourself. You need care too. You
• 1:05:59
  Speaker 2: need care. You need good food. Take yourself out.
• 1:06:07
  Speaker 3: Apparently, no matter how hard you try, people will say
• 1:06:09
  Speaker 3: you've not done enough.
• 1:06:12
  Speaker 2: So live first. Stay alive.
• 1:06:17
  Speaker 3: And I'm saying this because I know what I'm saying.
• 1:06:21
  Speaker 2: Stay alive. Plan for your future. Plan.
• 1:06:25
  Speaker 4: Plan.
• 1:06:28
  Speaker 2: Oh, a man is meant to give. He's a giver.
• 1:06:30
  Speaker 2: Family are there. Everybody is there. If you die, they
• 1:06:33
  Speaker 2: will move on. Heal.
• 1:06:38
  Speaker 3: I wish I can take the whole day to dwell
• 1:06:40
  Speaker 3: on that subject. Tell the man beside you, I know
• 1:06:44
  Speaker 3: you are bleeding, but you don't look like it.
• 1:06:47
  Speaker 2: Heal. I love you, brother. Tell the person, I love you, brother. Now,
• 1:06:53
  Speaker 2: have you observed? Now, listen. Listen.
• 1:06:56
  Speaker 3: You barely find situations where you see a man and
• 1:07:02
  Speaker 3: his father hugging.
• 1:07:05
  Speaker 2: You barely find it. If you see a guy and
• 1:07:11
  Speaker 2: his father exchange hug, that's one out of a million cases.
• 1:07:17
  Speaker 2: If you are here and you have been hugged by
• 1:07:18
  Speaker 2: your father before, stand. I can't stand. I'm preaching. That's
• 1:07:21
  Speaker 2: why I'm standing. One, two, three. You guys have better cases. Yeah.
• 1:07:25
  Speaker 2: Hold on. Sit down. Let me explain. Nobody say they
• 1:07:30
  Speaker 2: hug you. Hold on. Like it's a regular relationship. I'm
• 1:07:34
  Speaker 2: amazed to see that. Regular thing. Your father, you hug
• 1:07:37
  Speaker 2: each other. Stand again. Let me see. Regular. One, two, three, four. Amazing.
• 1:07:44
  Speaker 2: Let's give them a big hand. You are here as
• 1:07:47
  Speaker 2: a man. You are wired. You know instinctively.
• 1:07:50
  Speaker 3: You can't wait to have your own son and you
• 1:07:52
  Speaker 3: can't wait to hug him even at 30 and 40.
• 1:07:54
  Speaker 2: Stand. Stand.
• 1:07:57
  Speaker 3: We must repair the bridges that were broken. The emotions
• 1:08:00
  Speaker 3: that were not communicated by our fathers. We must repair it.
• 1:08:03
  Speaker 2: And give it. But you can't give what you don't have.
• 1:08:06
  Speaker 2: So have it first. Abundantly. Praise God. Please be seated.
• 1:08:10
  Speaker 2: Something is changing our world. When you get the man,
• 1:08:14
  Speaker 2: you get real revival. Something is changing.
• 1:08:20
  Speaker 3: Have you ever heard your father say to you before,
• 1:08:23
  Speaker 3: I love you. Can you see them laughing? How many
• 1:08:30
  Speaker 3: of you men have heard your father say to you, wow, Femi,
• 1:08:33
  Speaker 3: I love you. We can have a social experiment now.
• 1:08:42
  Speaker 3: Just call your dad on phone.
• 1:08:45
  Speaker 2: And say, hello, dad. What do you want? How much? Say,
• 1:08:52
  Speaker 2: I just want to tell you I love you. You know,
• 1:08:54
  Speaker 2: so where from here? Go and tell your mom. Okay.
• 1:08:52
  Speaker 2: He won't take it. Because he feels strange.
• 1:09:04
  Speaker 3: He's also bruised. It's from this functionality. And we pass
• 1:09:10
  Speaker 3: it from one lineage to another.
• 1:09:11
  Speaker 2: He's bruised.
• 1:09:12
  Speaker 4: That's the truth.
• 1:09:14
  Speaker 2: Don't blame him. It's not also easy to do better.
• 1:09:19
  Speaker 3: When you get there, you'll know.
• 1:09:22
  Speaker 2: To heal.
• 1:09:24
  Speaker 3: Number two. Now that sounds emotional. So let's break the cloud.
• 1:09:30
  Speaker 3: Be financially mature. You need money. You don't need all
• 1:09:36
  Speaker 3: the money in the world. But you sure do need money.
• 1:09:47
  Speaker 3: Whether mommy Jew. Mommy pastor.
• 1:09:51
  Speaker 2: Prayer warrior. Choir. Choir chord. Mommy anything. You don't need
• 1:10:00
  Speaker 2: to ask too much about a woman's love language. Money
• 1:10:02
  Speaker 2: is one of them. Fact. One day I saw my
• 1:10:11
  Speaker 2: wife looking so sad. I said, what's happening? I don't understand.
• 1:10:17
  Speaker 2: What's happening? I don't understand. Dance.
• 1:10:21
  Speaker 3: As you dance, I'll be spraying you money. From nowhere,
• 1:10:26
  Speaker 3: the sadness disappeared. What money cannot do? Say, the kind
• 1:10:36
  Speaker 3: of woman I'm going to marry is not somebody who
• 1:10:38
  Speaker 3: is vain.
• 1:10:39
  Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah.
• 1:10:42
  Speaker 3: Those who are deceiving you are not married. And if
• 1:10:45
  Speaker 3: they are married, their wives are crying.
• 1:10:47
  Speaker 2: They can't tell them.
• 1:10:48
  Speaker 3: Many of them talk proudly. They think they are good men.
• 1:10:51
  Speaker 3: If you ask the women what they are going through,
• 1:10:54
  Speaker 3: you will hate to be like them.
• 1:10:56
  Speaker 2: See, it's not about, it's not always women who are vain.
• 1:10:59
  Speaker 2: Oh boy, women are wired differently. From childhood, I remember myself,
• 1:11:04
  Speaker 2: my wife and my daughter went to a boutique to
• 1:11:07
  Speaker 2: get some things. How do you join girls? It's just
• 1:11:10
  Speaker 2: going to be two. So it verifies you. Why? Calm down.
• 1:11:18
  Speaker 3: The kind of happiness was displayed. Boys, I'll just be
• 1:11:22
  Speaker 3: jumping up and down. I'll be playing up and down. Girls,
• 1:11:25
  Speaker 3: from that age, they know what is nice. As you
• 1:11:28
  Speaker 3: wore the gown, wore the thing, she was already happy, jumping. Nawa,
• 1:11:35
  Speaker 3: let me say this to you. You need money. I'm
• 1:11:40
  Speaker 3: not taking you vanity. Poverty is also vanity. See, in
• 1:11:48
  Speaker 3: this life, everything is vanity. It's true, including poverty too.
• 1:11:55
  Speaker 3: We didn't pay anything to do work. We're not taking
• 1:11:56
  Speaker 3: anything back.
• 1:11:56
  Speaker 2: It's true.
• 1:11:59
  Speaker 3: Talking about home front. Now in economics you said you
• 1:12:03
  Speaker 3: need money for many things. One of it is precautionary purpose.
• 1:12:08
  Speaker 3: Childbirth is not an emergency. See we have an emergency.
• 1:12:12
  Speaker 3: You have nine months to prepare. Childbirth is not house rent.
• 1:12:23
  Speaker 2: It's not an emergency. You have one year to prepare.
• 1:12:27
  Speaker 2: Let's be factual. I said our rent is not an emergency.
• 1:12:32
  Speaker 2: It's not. The next bag of rice in there, whatever
• 1:12:35
  Speaker 2: it is, the package you do, it's not an emergency.
• 1:12:42
  Speaker 3: And we have to say it as it is. This
• 1:12:46
  Speaker 3: whole culture of before you marry again, test out 700 now.
• 1:12:49
  Speaker 3: Let her go and buy something. If she can make
• 1:12:50
  Speaker 3: good food, she's a good man. It's poverty that is
• 1:12:52
  Speaker 3: cooling you. It's poverty that is cooling you. That's a
• 1:12:56
  Speaker 3: dangerous orientation. And you too, the girl who is in
• 1:12:59
  Speaker 3: a hurry, who wants to prove 5,000 years of wife material.
• 1:13:04
  Speaker 3: You don't know what that means. What I say, you
• 1:13:06
  Speaker 3: will suffer. By the time your trouble starts, even your
• 1:13:14
  Speaker 3: angels will say, is this person.
• 1:13:15
  Speaker 2: Going to be guided? You better get what we are saying.
• 1:13:19
  Speaker 2: I'm telling you now.
• 1:13:20
  Speaker 3: Oh boy, listen oh, One of the worst things that
• 1:13:27
  Speaker 3: can happen is to marry somebody who is irresponsible.
• 1:13:33
  Speaker 2: Who will leave all the meat? Who will leave the
• 1:13:35
  Speaker 2: meat to you? He doesn't mind. He will sit down,
• 1:13:38
  Speaker 2: go and provide. He will come back. He will still cook.
• 1:13:40
  Speaker 2: He will still come back. He's on phone. He's gisting.
• 1:13:42
  Speaker 2: He's watching videos on Facebook. He won't do anything. That's
• 1:13:47
  Speaker 2: a dangerous person. You need money. You need money. That's man.
• 1:13:53
  Speaker 2: That's the fact. That's the fact. You need money. The
• 1:14:00
  Speaker 2: home front needs money. You will eat.
• 1:14:05
  Speaker 3: Sometimes sickness does not come with an announcement. Somebody is
• 1:14:07
  Speaker 3: just sick. So you must be a man who is
• 1:14:10
  Speaker 3: not eating with your ten fingers.
• 1:14:13
  Speaker 2: Who is planning. Anything can happen. We are not praying
• 1:14:16
  Speaker 2: for sickness. You get what I'm saying? That's not when
• 1:14:20
  Speaker 2: you now start saying, can I get 10k?
• 1:14:21
  Speaker 3: And I'm not. But when people hear this, they say,
• 1:14:24
  Speaker 3: don't mind him. He's only proud because he has. Only
• 1:14:26
  Speaker 3: God knows tomorrow. Stop responding to issue of money with emotions.
• 1:14:30
  Speaker 3: Emotions still won't fill your bank account. Do what is right.
• 1:14:35
  Speaker 3: We have to break these clocks of emotional Christianity. When
• 1:14:38
  Speaker 3: the yetis say, you know, it's not everybody that is
• 1:14:40
  Speaker 3: born like that. It's not everybody that has.
• 1:14:42
  Speaker 2: Men. Men. Men. Find ways to make sure that you
• 1:14:50
  Speaker 2: meet the needs.
• 1:14:51
  Speaker 3: The Bible says a man that can't provide for his
• 1:14:53
  Speaker 3: household is worse than an infidel.
• 1:14:59
  Speaker 2: It's basic. You must have a mind for it. I
• 1:15:04
  Speaker 2: am a provider. I am not El Shaddai, but I
• 1:15:08
  Speaker 2: provide also. After the order of Christ. Do you understand?
• 1:15:15
  Speaker 2: Do you understand? You need it. Because I don't know.
• 1:15:20
  Speaker 3: Where we are getting some darkened ideologies from. That when
• 1:15:25
  Speaker 3: a woman needs money, then she's worldly.
• 1:15:27
  Speaker 2: Says who? Says who? There are men who have not
• 1:15:36
  Speaker 2: given their wife money once to make the air. Not once.
• 1:15:40
  Speaker 2: Every time she makes air, it's wow, wow, like siren. Wow, wow, wow, wow.
• 1:15:44
  Speaker 4: Wow, wow, wow.
• 1:15:50
  Speaker 2: Surprise her one day, buy wig, not lie. Not lie.
• 1:15:55
  Speaker 2: What have you been buying? Huh? Give me something. All
• 1:16:00
  Speaker 2: the time. All the time. Tomorrow again. Next tomorrow. Stinginess
• 1:16:08
  Speaker 2: is real though. Now some men are not provided, not
• 1:16:20
  Speaker 2: because they don't have, but because they are stingy. Stingy, stingy. Stingy. Akagum. Stingy.
• 1:16:31
  Speaker 3: Ask the man beside you, hope you are not stingy.
• 1:16:34
  Speaker 3: Ask the person, don't look at him. Make sure you
• 1:16:36
  Speaker 3: are asking the man, hope you are not stingy. Hope
• 1:16:39
  Speaker 3: you are not a stingy one. Are you a giver?
• 1:16:43
  Speaker 3: Don't just say yeah, you can't judge yourself.
• 1:16:45
  Speaker 2: Are you a giver? Yeah. Now, we cannot overemphasize the
• 1:16:53
  Speaker 2: role of financial maturity in marriage.
• 1:16:58
  Speaker 3: Now, listen, one of the things women need to be
• 1:17:00
  Speaker 3: fulfilled is security. And one very important aspect of security
• 1:17:05
  Speaker 3: is financial security. Knowing fully well that if anything happens,
• 1:17:09
  Speaker 3: he has my back. As a man, have savings, have investment.
• 1:17:16
  Speaker 3: It doesn't matter how little it is, have.
• 1:17:19
  Speaker 2: Have investment. Plants are. Is that okay now? Very important.
• 1:17:27
  Speaker 2: Number three.
• 1:17:30
  Speaker 3: Practical things men need to put in place for marriage.
• 1:17:32
  Speaker 3: You must be emotionally mature. Emotional maturity.
• 1:17:39
  Speaker 2: Now, listen.
• 1:17:41
  Speaker 3: Some men should not really marry yet. Because they are
• 1:17:48
  Speaker 3: not emotionally mature. They don't know who a woman is
• 1:17:56
  Speaker 3: And how to relate with her uniquely. When they talk,
• 1:18:00
  Speaker 3: they talk without empathy. They have no, they are not aware.
• 1:18:06
  Speaker 3: They are totally disconnected from the reality of the feminine world.
• 1:18:11
  Speaker 3: They talk her down. Even before they are own parents.
• 1:18:17
  Speaker 3: There are men that call their mothers to report the wife.
• 1:18:21
  Speaker 3: I'm still going to get there. Because the 10th thing
• 1:18:23
  Speaker 3: you must put in place is to break up with
• 1:18:24
  Speaker 3: your mom. going to get there some men are more
• 1:18:28
  Speaker 3: connected to their mothers than their wives you're gonna marry
• 1:18:32
  Speaker 3: your mom you must marry her it is lack of
• 1:18:37
  Speaker 3: emotional maturity that makes you talk about your wife or
• 1:18:40
  Speaker 3: your spouse you.
• 1:18:41
  Speaker 2: See everything wrong with what they are doing.
• 1:18:44
  Speaker 3: And some men think their spouse are pretending when something
• 1:18:48
  Speaker 3: is hurting them and they are trying to communicate it maybe.
• 1:18:50
  Speaker 2: She's sick she has to say I'm not feeling well
• 1:18:53
  Speaker 2: when he's looking at her the reason why he's not
• 1:18:56
  Speaker 2: responding the way he should respond is because somewhere in
• 1:18:59
  Speaker 2: his mind he thinks he's not up to that he
• 1:19:02
  Speaker 2: thinks he's pretending he thinks he's lying he thinks he's
• 1:19:04
  Speaker 2: exaggerating it.
• 1:19:07
  Speaker 3: Because he has not built that aspect So he can relate.
• 1:19:14
  Speaker 3: She's pregnant. She needs you to be there.
• 1:19:20
  Speaker 2: Go and check.
• 1:19:21
  Speaker 3: Many women can't go for baby number two. Not because
• 1:19:24
  Speaker 3: they feel it, but because they know they are sent
• 1:19:25
  Speaker 3: to prison again. Pregnancy reminds them of their worst moments.
• 1:19:31
  Speaker 2: They won't care. They won't come home. He disappears.
• 1:19:36
  Speaker 3: He doesn't check up on her. That's why I say
• 1:19:39
  Speaker 3: all this, I love you, I love you. You better check.
• 1:19:42
  Speaker 2: Who you are marrying. Lack of emotional maturity. It's not aware.
• 1:19:47
  Speaker 2: Lack of awareness. And this is a real fact.
• 1:19:50
  Speaker 3: Sometimes they are not being discussed in church because we
• 1:19:52
  Speaker 3: feel church is not the place for it.
• 1:19:54
  Speaker 2: Are there people in church getting married? If yes, we
• 1:19:56
  Speaker 2: must discuss it in church.
• 1:19:59
  Speaker 3: It is lack of emotional maturity that make you despise
• 1:20:04
  Speaker 3: or ignore the pain of your spouse.
• 1:20:06
  Speaker 2: Something is eating out but it's not your business. Say, yeah,
• 1:20:10
  Speaker 2: what's my own day?
• 1:20:10
  Speaker 1: Yeah.
• 1:20:11
  Speaker 2: There's lack of emotional maturity. It is lack of emotional
• 1:20:19
  Speaker 2: maturity that make you talk bad your spouse to your friends.
• 1:20:24
  Speaker 2: Everybody cover their own spouse except you. You are the
• 1:20:27
  Speaker 2: one who is trying to convince the world that you
• 1:20:29
  Speaker 2: have married a witch.
• 1:20:32
  Speaker 3: And after saying all those things and destroying that image,
• 1:20:35
  Speaker 3: you come back trying to make everybody respect her again.
• 1:20:38
  Speaker 2: Who are you exactly?
• 1:20:43
  Speaker 3: It is lack of emotional maturity that makes you despise
• 1:20:45
  Speaker 3: or ignore the pain of your spouse.
• 1:20:47
  Speaker 2: It is lack of emotional maturity that makes you feel
• 1:20:49
  Speaker 2: your spouse is pretending or exaggerating when they are going
• 1:20:52
  Speaker 2: through things.
• 1:20:54
  Speaker 3: You feel they are lying. Say, what's there in pregnancy?
• 1:20:59
  Speaker 3: Me too, I'm carrying something in my head. Have you
• 1:21:03
  Speaker 3: seen the way he's talking? Seven things happen amongst others
• 1:21:12
  Speaker 3: when a woman marries a man who is not emotionally mature.
• 1:21:15
  Speaker 3: Seven things amongst others. Number one, she suffers these seven things.
• 1:21:18
  Speaker 3: Number one, she suffers abandonment. When you marry a man
• 1:21:21
  Speaker 3: who is not emotionally mature, you'll be abandoned. He's present,
• 1:21:27
  Speaker 3: but not available. He's around, but he's not there.
• 1:21:31
  Speaker 2: He speaks, but he's not communicating. He speaks, but he's
• 1:21:37
  Speaker 2: not communicating. abandonment.
• 1:21:42
  Speaker 3: And these are real issues. Many women really wish they
• 1:21:45
  Speaker 3: are not married to the men they are married to.
• 1:21:50
  Speaker 3: Number two, something quite close to it but not the same.
• 1:21:53
  Speaker 3: When a woman marries a man who is not emotionally mature,
• 1:21:55
  Speaker 3: she suffers loneliness. She is not feeling her emotional space.
• 1:22:03
  Speaker 3: Two has become one but one is still alone. Number three,
• 1:22:08
  Speaker 3: she suffers depravity. She's deprived of many things a woman
• 1:22:13
  Speaker 3: should enjoy in a man.
• 1:22:16
  Speaker 2: She's deprived of them. Number four, she suffers nakedness. He
• 1:22:25
  Speaker 2: exposes her everywhere. In fact, there's a trend that is
• 1:22:28
  Speaker 2: going on now, even on Facebook.
• 1:22:31
  Speaker 3: It looks like a reality show. People coming to expose
• 1:22:34
  Speaker 3: their spouse. Somebody will carry an interview camera.
• 1:22:38
  Speaker 2: What's that? What's the nonsense?
• 1:22:40
  Speaker 3: Children will grow up to go and see family stories online.
• 1:22:44
  Speaker 3: The trauma of the next generation is something we'll have
• 1:22:46
  Speaker 3: to prepare for uniquely. Because all their lives is on
• 1:22:50
  Speaker 3: social media. We have to really prepare for that generation
• 1:22:55
  Speaker 3: because if care is not taken, that's going to be
• 1:22:58
  Speaker 3: a very serious, a terrible generation. People who can't keep things,
• 1:23:03
  Speaker 3: bring a camera, come and interview us. Am I the
• 1:23:05
  Speaker 3: real father of this child? The child will grow up.
• 1:23:07
  Speaker 3: It's part of the content. It's part of the content.
• 1:23:11
  Speaker 3: Somebody has put online. When a man is not mature emotionally,
• 1:23:14
  Speaker 3: the woman is naked. He exposes her everywhere. Finds a
• 1:23:18
  Speaker 3: way to tell everybody everything wrong about her. And men,
• 1:23:21
  Speaker 3: you forget that you are a prophet. If you call
• 1:23:23
  Speaker 3: your wife anything, she becomes what you call her.
• 1:23:26
  Speaker 2: You are a priest. Number five.
• 1:23:30
  Speaker 3: When a woman marries a man who is not emotionally mature,
• 1:23:33
  Speaker 3: she suffers both physical, psychological and emotional abuse.
• 1:23:39
  Speaker 2: Both physical and He abused us. Some men hit their wives.
• 1:23:45
  Speaker 3: And they are talking. You can see their hands are shaking.
• 1:23:47
  Speaker 3: They can slap you. Psychological abuse. Now there are men
• 1:23:53
  Speaker 3: who don't touch their wives but they are more vicious
• 1:23:55
  Speaker 3: than those who beat their wives.
• 1:23:59
  Speaker 2: They will torment you psychologically. Torment.
• 1:24:06
  Speaker 3: Find every way to make sure you experience hell. Counsel
• 1:24:10
  Speaker 3: people before A man will beat his wife and beat
• 1:24:13
  Speaker 3: the wife. Went to report to the government. Say, we're
• 1:24:16
  Speaker 3: going to give you restraint. Touch this woman again. And
• 1:24:19
  Speaker 3: so on and so forth. Found a way to deal
• 1:24:22
  Speaker 3: with her without touching her. When they have a fight,
• 1:24:26
  Speaker 3: he will go and carry her equipment that she used
• 1:24:27
  Speaker 3: to make money. Begin to break them one by one.
• 1:24:31
  Speaker 2: Is that a man? Is that a man? Break all
• 1:24:35
  Speaker 2: her equipment.
• 1:24:36
  Speaker 3: If you see men that will beat their wives outside,
• 1:24:39
  Speaker 3: naked them. They were once yuppie. And the woman wants
• 1:24:44
  Speaker 3: to find him attractive. Tear their clothes outside. Call themselves names.
• 1:24:55
  Speaker 3: Children are now afraid to marry because of what they
• 1:24:57
  Speaker 3: have done to themselves. Sometimes husband and wife need to
• 1:25:00
  Speaker 3: ask themselves, what are we doing to ourselves? What are
• 1:25:03
  Speaker 3: we doing to our children? When you marry a man
• 1:25:07
  Speaker 3: who is not emotionally mature, you suffer both physical, psychological
• 1:25:10
  Speaker 3: and emotional abuse. Number six, when a woman marries a
• 1:25:14
  Speaker 3: man who is not emotionally mature, she suffers disregard and ridicule.
• 1:25:18
  Speaker 3: He ridicules her. You have to check and count your cost.
• 1:25:27
  Speaker 3: What he does to all, he will do to you
• 1:25:29
  Speaker 3: one day, soon. He doesn't have track record of loyalty,
• 1:25:32
  Speaker 3: faithfulness to anyone. Commitment means nothing to him, but he says,
• 1:25:36
  Speaker 3: I like him like that.
• 1:25:38
  Speaker 2: Oh, wow. Interesting. Interesting.
• 1:25:43
  Speaker 3: You see, the kind of mumunas that happen when people
• 1:25:44
  Speaker 3: are in love. Marriage is so precise and honest. It
• 1:25:48
  Speaker 3: will unveil everything. Let me say this to you.
• 1:25:52
  Speaker 2: When you have a guy who has broken up with
• 1:25:54
  Speaker 2: you once, twice, in fact, close the door. Close the door.
• 1:26:01
  Speaker 2: He comes around, shift again. Comes around, shift again. When
• 1:26:04
  Speaker 2: he now comes around, don't rejoice. Lock him out. Bang
• 1:26:08
  Speaker 2: him with no. When you are really important in his heart,
• 1:26:12
  Speaker 2: he knows how to go for it.
• 1:26:14
  Speaker 3: Why is he going up and down? And don't be
• 1:26:18
  Speaker 3: happy for the person he's now with. Don't be happy
• 1:26:22
  Speaker 3: for them. Don't feel, I'm happy for her. No, she
• 1:26:25
  Speaker 3: might be in trouble. That a relationship has led to
• 1:26:29
  Speaker 3: marriage doesn't mean it is working. Sometimes the problem has
• 1:26:32
  Speaker 3: just started. They should actually not marry. Proof to naysayers
• 1:26:39
  Speaker 3: by getting married is.
• 1:26:42
  Speaker 2: Is it proven that way? It will be there.
• 1:26:45
  Speaker 3: I'm in my own house. What's my business with that?
• 1:26:49
  Speaker 3: We don't even know you exist. We'll prove a point
• 1:26:52
  Speaker 3: to them. Those who think we can use your entire
• 1:26:55
  Speaker 3: life and the future of your children to prove points.
• 1:26:57
  Speaker 3: What a wise way to prove points.
• 1:27:03
  Speaker 2: Eventually, nobody should be pitied. You married what you chose.
• 1:27:08
  Speaker 3: It's your choice. You saw the person with your two eyes.
• 1:27:12
  Speaker 3: You ignored the fact. You cancelled the red light. You
• 1:27:17
  Speaker 3: kept giving him excuses. He has no vision. Pursuing nothing.
• 1:27:21
  Speaker 3: You kept saying it would be better. Now you have
• 1:27:24
  Speaker 3: to live with it. Don't excuse mediocrity. And we have
• 1:27:32
  Speaker 3: to start saying these things. Some men should only be
• 1:27:38
  Speaker 3: married by women That somebody has stopped praying for. Because really.
• 1:27:43
  Speaker 2: No woman who is not at the hand of God.
• 1:27:45
  Speaker 2: Should marry this guy. That's the fact.
• 1:27:48
  Speaker 3: Don't feel a girl is lucky. For marrying an unfaithful guy.
• 1:27:53
  Speaker 3: Who is a serial. Sexual offender. Going from one skirt
• 1:27:58
  Speaker 3: to another. Say I'm happy for you.
• 1:28:01
  Speaker 2: Another Saturday don't come now. I'm not married. Many Saturdays
• 1:28:07
  Speaker 2: are actually tragic events. Tragic events.
• 1:28:12
  Speaker 3: Silent barriers going on on Saturdays with the most beautiful
• 1:28:17
  Speaker 3: dresses and suits. And that's what you are envying. You
• 1:28:20
  Speaker 3: better enjoy being single for now. Your day will come.
• 1:28:24
  Speaker 3: If you are married, enjoy your home. Is that okay now? Say,
• 1:28:27
  Speaker 3: I wish I'm in your shoes. Have you seen the shoe?
• 1:28:30
  Speaker 3: They are just wearing it. Wait for another two months.
• 1:28:37
  Speaker 3: Number seven. When you marry a man who is not
• 1:28:39
  Speaker 3: a mature you become mentally deranged you practically make you
• 1:28:43
  Speaker 3: a witch you look like a mad woman that's what
• 1:28:46
  Speaker 3: is going to make you you begin to shout you
• 1:28:48
  Speaker 3: begin to manifest characters you didn't know you have it's
• 1:28:51
  Speaker 3: going to almost scatter your head you look at him
• 1:28:54
  Speaker 3: and say I was not like this now what are
• 1:28:56
  Speaker 3: you turning me into you married him You will manifest
• 1:29:01
  Speaker 3: things you don't know you have. You will become toxic.
• 1:29:05
  Speaker 3: Every time you are seeing things in his bag, he's
• 1:29:09
  Speaker 3: going to bring things from you that you will see
• 1:29:14
  Speaker 3: yourself acting out things you never thought.
• 1:29:16
  Speaker 2: You could act out.
• 1:29:21
  Speaker 3: A strange man can practically make you a mad woman.
• 1:29:26
  Speaker 3: Look well before you leap. I just want to marry
• 1:29:30
  Speaker 3: this year. Many things are happening this year. This year
• 1:29:38
  Speaker 3: is my year. This is my season. These are not
• 1:29:51
  Speaker 3: funny matters. These are serious matters. One of the signs
• 1:29:58
  Speaker 3: you'll see in a man who is not emotionally mature
• 1:30:00
  Speaker 3: is insecurity.
• 1:30:03
  Speaker 2: Now, hold on. Hold on. Hold on.
• 1:30:05
  Speaker 3: Insecure people are the first people to notice pride. They
• 1:30:10
  Speaker 3: are the first to observe pride. Because when somebody is confident,
• 1:30:15
  Speaker 3: it hurts their ego. They believe no woman should really have.
• 1:30:20
  Speaker 3: But when a woman has money, she becomes proud. So
• 1:30:23
  Speaker 3: they find a way to break you so they can
• 1:30:25
  Speaker 3: control you. break you with words. Say things that will
• 1:30:28
  Speaker 3: hurt your feelings. Say things that will break your heart.
• 1:30:32
  Speaker 2: Insecurity. How can she be any more than me? Resign.
• 1:30:36
  Speaker 2: If you truly love me. Insecurity. Number four.
• 1:30:44
  Speaker 3: Before you marry, among the things you have to put
• 1:30:47
  Speaker 3: in before you marry, understand the female species before you
• 1:30:52
  Speaker 3: marry them. Understand the female A woman is built differently
• 1:30:59
  Speaker 3: from a man. In fact, how do I even put this?
• 1:31:05
  Speaker 3: I remember my daughter, she was about how many months?
• 1:31:08
  Speaker 3: Then maybe about four or five months. I remember one
• 1:31:11
  Speaker 3: day I was going to go on a retreat. I
• 1:31:13
  Speaker 3: have my regular retreat, just go out of the house
• 1:31:16
  Speaker 3: and retreat. I was going to carry my daughter and
• 1:31:18
  Speaker 3: say hello. I said goodbye to my wife.
• 1:31:20
  Speaker 2: Going to go for a few days. And around that season,
• 1:31:23
  Speaker 2: my daughter would never allow me to carry her. When
• 1:31:25
  Speaker 2: she looked at my beard, she would.
• 1:31:26
  Speaker 3: Scream, I paid for you before you came.
• 1:31:30
  Speaker 2: Now you came, but I can't carry you.
• 1:31:34
  Speaker 3: She hated my beard. And she was not going to
• 1:31:37
  Speaker 3: compromise it. You either remove this beard or you are
• 1:31:39
  Speaker 3: not my daddy. I remember I had to go and
• 1:31:43
  Speaker 3: remove the beard.
• 1:31:44
  Speaker 2: I had to now. I had to shave. Yes.
• 1:31:50
  Speaker 3: Before she now started allowing me to carry her. That's
• 1:31:52
  Speaker 3: who she is. Sometimes it looks like women are opinionated.
• 1:31:58
  Speaker 3: It's their design. It must be controlled.
• 1:32:01
  Speaker 2: They don't use that as witchcraft. They are close.
• 1:32:06
  Speaker 3: Control and manipulate. A woman is different. A woman is
• 1:32:14
  Speaker 3: really different. Sometimes you can be amazed. When she's happy,
• 1:32:19
  Speaker 3: she cries.
• 1:32:21
  Speaker 2: Why are you crying? I'm really touched. Yeah. Wow. Interesting.
• 1:32:31
  Speaker 2: Another time again, he's crying. What's going on? Have I
• 1:32:36
  Speaker 2: offended you? Say, no, no. You have not offended me.
• 1:32:39
  Speaker 2: Is something going on? Say, no. I don't even just understand. Wow.
• 1:32:45
  Speaker 2: So when you don't understand too, you cry. Wow. Another
• 1:32:52
  Speaker 2: time again. What's going on? Say, Yesterday night, did you
• 1:32:57
  Speaker 2: eat your food? Wow. When I don't eat my food,
• 1:33:02
  Speaker 2: do you cry? Wow. Happy birthday. Why are you crying?
• 1:33:13
  Speaker 2: We are all here to say, I'm touched. When you
• 1:33:16
  Speaker 2: are touched, do you cry? Wow. What a species.
• 1:33:24
  Speaker 3: See, the human being that God made when you were sleeping,
• 1:33:27
  Speaker 3: you need to go and read the manual.
• 1:33:31
  Speaker 2: Were you awake when God made that? He made you
• 1:33:32
  Speaker 2: to sleep. In answer, you know. Go and read manual.
• 1:33:37
  Speaker 2: And I don't have the manual. Me too.
• 1:33:39
  Speaker 3: The manual, they update the manual every day. This manual
• 1:33:43
  Speaker 3: is daily update. That's it that made you smile. It's
• 1:33:47
  Speaker 3: not organic.
• 1:33:48
  Speaker 2: Wow. What's the new update? Say for me too, I
• 1:33:52
  Speaker 2: don't know. Okay. We'll find out together. Daily update of
• 1:33:57
  Speaker 2: this one. Daily update. Happy wife, happy life. Happy wife,
• 1:34:06
  Speaker 2: happy life.
• 1:34:07
  Speaker 3: As a man, you must decide that you bring your
• 1:34:11
  Speaker 3: wife joy. You are not God who is the giver
• 1:34:14
  Speaker 3: of joy, but you make her happy. Speak well about her,
• 1:34:19
  Speaker 3: both in her presence and in her absence. Don't compare
• 1:34:23
  Speaker 3: with anybody.
• 1:34:25
  Speaker 2: Don't. When you do that, you make her insecure. Praise God.
• 1:34:36
  Speaker 2: I've seen my wife cry several times. I'd be like, what?
• 1:34:43
  Speaker 2: What's happening?
• 1:34:48
  Speaker 3: 99.99% of times, the answer is, even me too, I
• 1:34:52
  Speaker 3: don't know. What can I do about what I don't know?
• 1:34:58
  Speaker 3: And you don't know. We don't know.
• 1:35:02
  Speaker 2: Who am I? What can I do? Because you apparently
• 1:35:09
  Speaker 2: don't know. And me too, of course. I don't know.
• 1:35:18
  Speaker 2: I'll be fine.
• 1:35:19
  Speaker 3: How?
• 1:35:22
  Speaker 2: When a man cries, he knows why. Just go and sleep.
• 1:35:30
  Speaker 2: You are not ready for marriage. You are not ready
• 1:35:36
  Speaker 2: for marriage. Understand the female gender. They are different.
• 1:35:53
  Speaker 3: Sometimes they may be a bit manipulative and not really
• 1:35:55
  Speaker 3: talk straight. Sometimes They are not too direct. You want
• 1:35:58
  Speaker 3: to tell something, go right, left, left, blah, blah, blah.
• 1:36:05
  Speaker 3: And sometimes women have issues with I'm sorry. Because I'm
• 1:36:08
  Speaker 3: sorry means you are wrong. And in the first place,
• 1:36:14
  Speaker 3: women are always right. South, north, west, east, south, south, west, west.
• 1:36:26
  Speaker 2: Yeah, sorry. Wow. But my wife used to say I'm sorry.
• 1:36:39
  Speaker 2: Very well. I'm actually being honest. She used to say
• 1:36:45
  Speaker 2: it very well.
• 1:36:46
  Speaker 3: That's the fact. My wife doesn't like trouble and I
• 1:36:49
  Speaker 3: don't like... What was the conversation we had about peace
• 1:36:52
  Speaker 3: in the home? I asked her a simple question. Do
• 1:36:54
  Speaker 3: you like trouble?
• 1:36:55
  Speaker 2: Say, no, me too, I don't like trouble. Don't let's
• 1:36:58
  Speaker 2: stress ourselves.
• 1:37:00
  Speaker 3: Honestly, that's the conversation. I promise I won't stress you.
• 1:37:04
  Speaker 3: I don't like wahala. You too, don't stress me. That's
• 1:37:10
  Speaker 3: it all. So, if I say that this thing will
• 1:37:13
  Speaker 3: stress my wife, I won't do it. I might be pastor, pastor, pastor.
• 1:37:17
  Speaker 3: If my wife start, you know, getting, crying, I just
• 1:37:22
  Speaker 3: need to understand what is happening. Because you say, I'm apostle.
• 1:37:30
  Speaker 3: You want to apostolize your wife. It doesn't work.
• 1:37:34
  Speaker 2: Women. Sometimes when women are talking, you feel you can say,
• 1:37:39
  Speaker 2: take it now. They're not going to take it. This one. Say, kini. Kini.
• 1:37:46
  Speaker 2: What are you talking about?
• 1:37:47
  Speaker 4: Sit down.
• 1:37:47
  Speaker 2: Let's talk.
• 1:37:51
  Speaker 3: Let me share a very funny story with you. Then
• 1:37:52
  Speaker 3: I give you the last one. I remember one time
• 1:37:56
  Speaker 3: we went on couples retreat. Myself and a couple of friends.
• 1:37:58
  Speaker 3: I don't want to mention names. And there was a
• 1:38:01
  Speaker 3: session in the retreat.
• 1:38:03
  Speaker 2: I don't know.
• 1:38:04
  Speaker 3: I know it's a woman that put a session there.
• 1:38:06
  Speaker 3: That we should have a session. That women should now
• 1:38:10
  Speaker 3: talk to their husband. Nobody should hold phone. Nobody should
• 1:38:14
  Speaker 3: press phone. Everybody submit your phone at the dining then.
• 1:38:17
  Speaker 3: Pick a spot on the floor. Different clusters.
• 1:38:19
  Speaker 2: Husband and wife. Now talk to your husband.
• 1:38:23
  Speaker 3: Husband.
• 1:38:23
  Speaker 2: About the things you have always wanted to tell him.
• 1:38:25
  Speaker 2: That he's not listening ah when they announce that session
• 1:38:31
  Speaker 2: if there's a way to run ah Lazarus we run
• 1:38:38
  Speaker 2: because sometimes you know your wife has many things to
• 1:38:40
  Speaker 2: say but you are just escaping so my wife began
• 1:38:44
  Speaker 2: to talk I.
• 1:38:46
  Speaker 3: Was just scratching my head I wanted to go and
• 1:38:49
  Speaker 3: pick my phone so I can be escaping in my mind.
• 1:38:52
  Speaker 2: But they said no. When she was done talking, I
• 1:38:57
  Speaker 2: look at my life.
• 1:39:00
  Speaker 3: I said, so this is what I've been doing. And
• 1:39:04
  Speaker 3: I sat down, started thinking, look at my friends. They
• 1:39:09
  Speaker 3: are treating their wives well. Their wives are happy. Nobody
• 1:39:13
  Speaker 3: is complaining.
• 1:39:13
  Speaker 2: It's just me.
• 1:39:15
  Speaker 3: What's my life becoming? I'm finished now. let me go
• 1:39:21
  Speaker 3: and ask them how they are doing it. And I
• 1:39:26
  Speaker 3: met one of them on the staircase.
• 1:39:28
  Speaker 2: He did like this. I said, bro, what's going on?
• 1:39:36
  Speaker 2: He looked at me, the eyes was red.
• 1:39:39
  Speaker 3: He said, my brother, today, I said, for me and you,
• 1:39:48
  Speaker 3: I have Okay, at least I'm not the only one now.
• 1:39:51
  Speaker 3: The third person, that one, is the fire. The wife
• 1:39:56
  Speaker 3: cannot even complain.
• 1:39:59
  Speaker 2: I met him sitting by the dining. He was like this. Bro,
• 1:40:04
  Speaker 2: you too? He said, my brother, my head won't blow.
• 1:40:13
  Speaker 2: You too? Where is the fourth person? When the wife
• 1:40:18
  Speaker 2: finishes talking, you just start walking on the road. Wow.
• 1:40:33
  Speaker 2: The problem with us men is that we are the
• 1:40:35
  Speaker 2: ones marking our report card.
• 1:40:37
  Speaker 3: And when you do, you cause your wife pain. You
• 1:40:41
  Speaker 3: must communicate. And she must be able to tell you
• 1:40:44
  Speaker 3: what is hurting her.
• 1:40:45
  Speaker 2: And you must listen. This story is a very serious story.
• 1:40:50
  Speaker 3: It just showed to me that anointing is not a
• 1:40:54
  Speaker 3: sign that you are making your wife happy. Because all
• 1:40:57
  Speaker 3: of us in that meeting, in that retreat, are all
• 1:41:01
  Speaker 3: anointed young men doing some front line things in our
• 1:41:05
  Speaker 3: own generation. But our wives were not happy. You know,
• 1:41:09
  Speaker 3: you heard some factual stories like this during messages. Maybe
• 1:41:13
  Speaker 3: pastors try to present themselves superman. But I'm telling you
• 1:41:16
  Speaker 3: a real fact here. Just in case you feel You
• 1:41:19
  Speaker 3: are losing it because you feel you are not getting
• 1:41:21
  Speaker 3: it right.
• 1:41:22
  Speaker 2: I'm showing you, I myself, I'm learning on the job.
• 1:41:24
  Speaker 2: You're all learning on the job.
• 1:41:27
  Speaker 3: Number five, things you must get right before you marry.
• 1:41:31
  Speaker 2: Get purpose right. Get purpose right.
• 1:41:34
  Speaker 3: If a man doesn't know where he's going to, everywhere
• 1:41:36
  Speaker 3: he gets to look like where he's going. Get purpose right.
• 1:41:40
  Speaker 3: Get purpose right. It is important you know what you
• 1:41:42
  Speaker 3: have been cut out to do so that you can
• 1:41:46
  Speaker 3: identify the one who is cut out to help you.
• 1:41:49
  Speaker 3: There's no point seeking help when there's no duty on ground.
• 1:41:53
  Speaker 3: A man who is ready for marriage is not just
• 1:41:55
  Speaker 3: to be discovering purpose. He should somehow be in the
• 1:41:58
  Speaker 3: middle of it. Adam, Eve met Adam in the middle
• 1:42:01
  Speaker 3: of the walk. Not that he's trying to discover the walk.
• 1:42:05
  Speaker 3: He has started. Then she can join.
• 1:42:08
  Speaker 2: Is that okay now?
• 1:42:09
  Speaker 3: She's not designed to help you discover it.
• 1:42:11
  Speaker 2: She's designed to help you fulfill it. Discover it. Start.
• 1:42:17
  Speaker 3: Now, you may be called broke but make sure you
• 1:42:20
  Speaker 3: can't be called lazy. Because somewhere, somehow, you may be
• 1:42:25
  Speaker 3: in the middle of the building phase, you may be broke,
• 1:42:28
  Speaker 3: but make sure you can't be called visionless. Have something
• 1:42:35
  Speaker 3: you are pursuing. Is that clear now?
• 1:42:38
  Speaker 2: Alright, and that is where I will stop for tonight.
• 1:42:43
  Speaker 2: So I want to believe you have been blessed. Am
• 1:42:48
  Speaker 2: I correct?
• 1:42:49
  Speaker 1: Yes.
• 1:42:50
  Speaker 2: Have you been blessed? Give God a big hand if
• 1:42:53
  Speaker 2: you have been blessed.
• 1:42:56
  Speaker 3: Praise God. What a great God we serve. Can we
• 1:42:58
  Speaker 3: just thank God for bringing his word to us? Let's
• 1:43:02
  Speaker 3: thank him. Let's give him praise for bringing his word
• 1:43:06
  Speaker 3: to us again. Let's appreciate him and let's honor him.
• 1:43:13
  Speaker 3: Let's honor him.
• 1:43:16
  Speaker 2: I believe many of us have heard things that will
• 1:43:18
  Speaker 2: go a long way to help us.
• 1:43:21
  Speaker 3: Let's honor him. Let's just thank him. And every area
• 1:43:25
  Speaker 3: you have discovered you need help, don't mourn it. We
• 1:43:28
  Speaker 3: are all learning in the process. Come on, cry to
• 1:43:30
  Speaker 3: him for help. The areas where you need emotional healing.
• 1:43:36
  Speaker 1: The message you just listened to is sponsored by the
• 1:43:38
  Speaker 1: friends and partners of Femi Lazarus Apostolic Ministries Ecumenical, FLAME.
• 1:43:43
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• 1:43:46
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