Latest / All Figured Out with Andrea Barr: Figuring Out Work, Life and Parenting / 130. Why working parents need to stop managing days and start managing months
Transcript
- 0:05This is all figured out. I'm Andrea Barr.
- 0:07I'm a career coach for parents, a mom of two, and I absolutely
- 0:11believe that you can continue to grow personally and
- 0:14professionally while protecting family time.
- 0:19We're about to figure out this work, life and parenting stuff
- 0:22out together. Welcome back to the all figured
- 0:32out podcast. It is just me today, your host
- 0:36Andrea Barr. Thank you for joining me again
- 0:39this week. And when this goes live, I will
- 0:43hopefully be on vacation if my my calendar math is correct and
- 0:48I I'm leaving tomorrow morning, we are going on a sunny vacation
- 0:55as a family of four. We're going to meet up with my
- 0:58folks and some other family members and just have a fabulous
- 1:01time. And I have so many open
- 1:06suitcases, so many half packed bags and like things that are
- 1:12stacked in piles in different places.
- 1:14And yet I felt super inspired to record this episode for you.
- 1:21We are literally leaving in less than 24 hours.
- 1:25But I've just been thinking so much about my schedule and time.
- 1:31And I've actually been working on this with my therapist too,
- 1:33like my relationship with time. And I always find it so
- 1:38interesting before I go on a break or have a vacation or take
- 1:43time or there's some sort of break in the regular scheduling,
- 1:46programming, what have you. I get super, super reflective.
- 1:51And I think I was talking about this at the top of the year,
- 1:54just about how it's like this opportunity to like rewrite
- 1:59everything and like completely recalibrate or like throw
- 2:03everything that we used to do out the window and start again.
- 2:07I don't know what it is. And hit me up.
- 2:09Tell me if this is just me or if you are like this as well.
- 2:15So that is what this episode is going to be about.
- 2:18It's probably going to be short and sweet.
- 2:20I have a few notes that I wrote. Got a coffee here.
- 2:23I'm sitting cross legged in my leggings.
- 2:25If you're watching this on YouTube, you can see this is a
- 2:27casual vibe. And I want to just be really
- 2:31honest with you about my relationship with time, my
- 2:34relationship with my calendar, what life looks like now that
- 2:38I'm an entrepreneur, what life looked like when I was apparent
- 2:41in corporate navigating that. And just some of the things that
- 2:45I think I'm going to do differently coming back from
- 2:47this vacation. And you know what, you can hold
- 2:50me to it because this is going on the interwebs.
- 2:53This is going to be landing in your ears and I'm going to make
- 2:57this official. So let's get into it.
- 3:01And if you like this format, there's more chatty like I'm
- 3:04really the the vibe of this is going to be voice note.
- 3:06Really, really long voice note. I love a good voice note.
- 3:11I have a few friends that I send like wildly long voice notes to
- 3:15you know who you are and they are also listeners of the show
- 3:17and I just love getting them back.
- 3:20I love doing dishes and listening to a juicy long voice
- 3:23note that like you don't even know how to respond to because
- 3:26you forget all the things the person says, but it's just the
- 3:29best. So anyways, this is like a voice
- 3:31note episode and let me know if you enjoy this format.
- 3:35OK, so when I think about if I take it back and I think about
- 3:40like my first relationship with time and schedules and calendars
- 3:46and all that, it was probably back in high school.
- 3:51I was somebody who, go figure, probably surprised to nobody was
- 3:55involved in so many different things.
- 3:57I'm one of those people that would have like, my theatre
- 3:59friends, my basketball friends, my like friends that I'd like to
- 4:02like go and chat about boys with on the weekends or whatever.
- 4:07So I was definitely no stranger to juggling like a lot of
- 4:10different schedules, but I loved it and I thrived in that, in
- 4:14that way. And then you get to get like, I
- 4:17got to university and it was like, OK, now I have to like
- 4:20really manage my own time. Like, you know, in high school I
- 4:22still had my mom who would be like driving me around or like
- 4:25helping me navigate and figure things out.
- 4:28And yeah, it was kind of like more alone and was having to
- 4:31navigate my time again. I was involved in all sorts of
- 4:33different crazy things again, doing musical theatre and I
- 4:36don't know, like business group council for this thing or that,
- 4:39I don't know, weird, weird, weird stuff.
- 4:41And then it started to be like the work hard, play hard vibe,
- 4:45which was when that started. And then I graduated university
- 4:48and I got into advertising. And if anybody has worked in the
- 4:53advertising world, especially like the 510 years ago vibe when
- 4:58it was very much still like Mad Men style.
- 5:01Like if you've ever watched Mad Men, I say that that it's true.
- 5:04Like it was very similar to to Mad Men.
- 5:08There was less cigarettes, probably just as much booze,
- 5:11just as much like office romance.
- 5:13That's where I met my husband. So I mean, it was pretty spot
- 5:17on. And that was when the calendar
- 5:22and the schedule and the juggling and the time management
- 5:26got so crazy and out of control. I didn't even have kids.
- 5:32And that is, like, a big part of my story that I've said on this
- 5:34show a number of times is, you know, looking at my boss and my
- 5:39boss's boss and my boss's boss's boss and those who were heading
- 5:42up the company who had children, young children.
- 5:44And I remember thinking, like, whoa, I can barely do this.
- 5:48And it's just me. Like, sure, I'm at the bottom of
- 5:51the totem pole and I'm getting all the work and I have to stay
- 5:53late. And like, that's just what you
- 5:55had to do back then. But I remember looking at the
- 5:58people who had kids and being like, how are you doing this?
- 6:02Like, how are you doing this? And I wanna, maybe I should go
- 6:07back and interview some of those people because it was an
- 6:09incredibly intense culture. It was, again, very work hard,
- 6:15play hard. And I, I don't have any regrets.
- 6:19Like you really don't have any regrets in life.
- 6:21But there were a few moments that really didn't feel right.
- 6:24And I know that those aren't regrets because they taught me a
- 6:26lot. Like I missed my sister's
- 6:30wedding shower. Baby shower, No wedding shower.
- 6:35And we had a pitch that was like happening that Monday or
- 6:39something. And I was the business
- 6:41development person. So I did like all the grunt work
- 6:43on the business development for the agency.
- 6:46And it was like my playoffs basically.
- 6:48So I'm not making excuses, but like, that was just no bueno.
- 6:52Like, I cannot believe that. And that was our first taste of
- 6:55being like, OK, if I keep on this path and this, you know,
- 6:57journey, will I be missing my kids?
- 7:00Things like, you know, if I were to have kids one day, am I
- 7:04missing the basketball game? Am I missing the concert?
- 7:07Like, I don't want to be the person in those movies who's,
- 7:09like, running through traffic trying to get there.
- 7:12So that was definitely my first nudge and like, I don't know,
- 7:20awakening that was like, whoa, what time is such a weird thing?
- 7:26And Fast forward again to COVID. I would say that was the next
- 7:33juncture in my like relationship with time where, you know, we
- 7:37got into like a really nice rhythm routine.
- 7:40Like again, I was working in the fashion industry in learning and
- 7:44development, leading the people development programming at a
- 7:48really high performance organization.
- 7:51Very stressful. Again, intense pressure and
- 7:55culture, though I, we didn't have kids yet.
- 7:58I had my husband. We bought a house.
- 8:01Like things were very like, OK, we've got some rhythms.
- 8:03I was even working 2 jobs. Technically I was coaching.
- 8:07I still, I opened my own business and was coaching in the
- 8:10mornings in the evenings. I was going to work during the
- 8:12day, was working out, you know, somewhere in there like we're
- 8:15just just doing it all. And it felt like it was like
- 8:17very much in control. And I think that that's a big
- 8:19theme for all of this too, is like that sense of control,
- 8:24like, you know, do you have control?
- 8:27Like when I was in advertising, I didn't really have any control
- 8:30of my calendar. I couldn't be declining calendar
- 8:33invites because it was like my day was too much or my nervous
- 8:36system was off Like, no, like I'm, I was chockablock with
- 8:40meetings, but like, I did not have any sort of leg to stand on
- 8:44to dictate how my calendar went. And then I did have like time
- 8:50and space. And then come COVID, it was even
- 8:54more time and space because so much got cut for like all the
- 8:58noise cut. A lot of good stuff got caught
- 9:01cut, but it was very focused on just like health and walks in
- 9:06this nut. And I bring all this up as like
- 9:08the back story to say, like, you know, maybe reflect on your own
- 9:13as well and like your own relationship with time and like,
- 9:15you know, what's the baggage that you carry and what phases
- 9:19of, you know, your relationship with your scheduled do you have
- 9:23to look back on? And it's just such an
- 9:26interesting, like, journey to walk through to then come to
- 9:30this moment whenever you're listening to this and be like,
- 9:34OK, and so where am I at now? And what I was in corporate and
- 9:40had my daughter and I went back to work after Matt leave.
- 9:43That felt really, that probably felt like the most constrained
- 9:48I've ever felt. And I'm saying that not because
- 9:52I've got a solution per se. I've definitely got tips and
- 9:55tricks and all that and how to make things work, but I don't
- 9:58have a solution for that pressure.
- 10:01I was coaching a woman this morning and she was like, it was
- 10:05one of the hardest things to do to go back after Matt leave with
- 10:09her first. And I have to agree.
- 10:12That is so much of the motivation of the work that I do
- 10:16now because I just don't believe that mothers especially are
- 10:20resourced, have enough resources, have enough support
- 10:24for that transition back. And I felt so out of control.
- 10:31And that's that story that I tell I've told on the podcast
- 10:34about going back to work and just feeling in shambles.
- 10:40Like I remember my hormones just felt like so off.
- 10:43Like I wouldn't say I had mom brain or any of those, like, you
- 10:47know, words that people use or phrases, but it was more just
- 10:49like I the I say this a lot I've said on social, like I just
- 10:55don't care. Like, I don't care about this.
- 11:00You know, the people are getting so riled up in a meeting and I
- 11:04feel like I'm chained and handcuffed to this meeting when
- 11:08I hear my daughter in the other room.
- 11:09We had a nanny and so I could hear her and it wasn't me that
- 11:13was with her. And she's like giggling or like
- 11:15eating or crying or whatever. And that's, you know, someone's
- 11:19going off about something that does matter.
- 11:21You know, it matters in the context of work.
- 11:23But like early in the grand scheme of things, like does not
- 11:27matter. And I remember just being like,
- 11:29Oh my God, this is, this is ridiculous.
- 11:32Like, how is anybody here caring about caring about this?
- 11:37And that was that first moment for me of being like, wow, I
- 11:40something has got to give. Something's not right.
- 11:44And of course, that and I explored like, OK, what is it
- 11:47about this? Is it the subject matter?
- 11:49Is it the fact that I'm not with my daughter?
- 11:51And for me, it was the lack of control.
- 11:54I felt I had to be bum and seat whether it was at my desk or in
- 11:58the office. At the time, it was like, I
- 12:01think a hybrid. And it was like 8:30 to 5:30.
- 12:06And there's no leniency. Like, sure, if there's an
- 12:09emergency, like there was like kindness, but there really
- 12:12wasn't leniency. There was no, it was not
- 12:14flexible job. And I was like, that just does
- 12:17not work for me. And then when I was looking at
- 12:21the work itself, I was like, this is the this is work in
- 12:25theory that I love and that I have experience in.
- 12:29And I was, I was doing cool work in theory.
- 12:33However, the day-to-day of the work, the pace that it was
- 12:38moving at, the impact it was making just wasn't there for me.
- 12:41So I was like, so not only do I feel so not in control of my
- 12:46time and I can't just like go put my daughter down to sleep if
- 12:50she's having a hard time falling asleep, she's like 1.
- 12:53I also am working on stuff that I'm like, I don't like, you
- 12:58know, I was just like, and I have to call out that money is
- 13:04absolutely a factor. So that was a big piece of why
- 13:07sometimes the is OK. And like, had I not had, you
- 13:12know, a series of events where, like, my husband's health
- 13:15dramatically improved around that time.
- 13:18It was really poor for a long time.
- 13:20And then he started to get so much better, so much better.
- 13:23And just a lot of things unfolded for us where it felt
- 13:25like, OK, we could take this risk and I could leave and go
- 13:28out on my own. Um, like for me, it just wasn't,
- 13:33nothing was really lining up. And that was my decision to
- 13:36leave because of my relationship with time, because of my
- 13:40relationship with flexibility. And just it, it just, it didn't
- 13:45feel like the reward was coming from anywhere.
- 13:47Like the financial reward didn't feel worth it for me when I knew
- 13:51that I could be making a bigger impact, having more fun, having
- 13:56greater alignment with my family values my schedule.
- 14:00Like to me, time was just like, it was so important at that
- 14:05moment. And so I'm so appreciative that
- 14:09I did go back because I think I wouldn't say I made an impact
- 14:14when I went back, honestly, like I was back for only for about I
- 14:17think 4, three or six months. But having that experience of
- 14:21transitioning back into the corporate world after a
- 14:24maternity leave is so important. It's such an important
- 14:28experience that I went through because now just that awareness
- 14:31and empathy I have for those that I work with as a coach and
- 14:35when I'm facilitating group programs and doing my VIP days
- 14:40one to one with clients. It's like that is a topic that
- 14:43thumbs up almost every single time, whether it's somebody who
- 14:46just had a really rough go and they're still holding on to like
- 14:49a bit of trauma from it or somebody who's going through it
- 14:52at that moment and I can help them to really prepare.
- 14:55It is so important to like really think about your
- 14:59relationship with time, your relationship to the different
- 15:02reasons why you're working. You know, how much of it is
- 15:04about money, how much of it is about your time?
- 15:07How much of it is about your enjoyment?
- 15:09And if none of that is really working for you, that is when
- 15:13you absolutely have to maybe hit the drawing board again.
- 15:17Come back, reassess, give me a call.
- 15:20We can have a free intro call to chat about what work life
- 15:26alignment could look like for you.
- 15:28I digress, but that brings me to today.
- 15:33So that's kind of the back story of like my history, my
- 15:35relationship with time. I'm not going to get into like
- 15:38the personal side of it where like I did lose a parent at a
- 15:41really young age. And so my dad passed away when I
- 15:45was four. And my mom has always said like
- 15:47we just have to live life. Like we just have to live life.
- 15:50Like you have to live every day. You life is too short.
- 15:53Like that's always been the narrative for me in my house and
- 15:57growing up. And so that's also really
- 16:00important context as well in my relationship with time.
- 16:03So here we are today, two kids, one is 5/1 is 3.
- 16:09My husband and I are actually both self-employed.
- 16:11So he is kind of like a foster fail.
- 16:13He works in an organization that he's worked at for like I want
- 16:17to say 3 or 4 years is technically as a contractor, but
- 16:21it is a full time gig. But he does work for himself, so
- 16:24he has flexibility there. And then I fully work for myself
- 16:28and I'm footloose and fancy free.
- 16:29And I have often told people when they've asked me, so how's
- 16:33it going? How's the entrepreneurial really
- 16:35going? I've said this so many times
- 16:37like I am the worst boss I've ever had.
- 16:41Hands down the worst boss I've ever had.
- 16:44The things I say to myself in my head is ridiculous.
- 16:49The just the, the lack of like KPI's or metrics that give
- 16:56myself like, it's so unbelievable to me that people
- 16:58that can run their solo preneurship or their
- 17:02entrepreneurial experience with like by themselves without any
- 17:06sort of accountability is like, Oh my gosh, kudos to you.
- 17:09So for me, it has really, it's really been an interesting
- 17:15experience of time management. I and I really hate that.
- 17:20Like I know there's energy management, which is a whole
- 17:22other topic. We've talked about that on the
- 17:25podcast for sure before, but just like how do you structure
- 17:29your time? So when you do have the
- 17:31flexibility, I think it's important for me to call out
- 17:34that a lot of you listening might have a nine to five job
- 17:37and you might be really craving freedom and flexibility.
- 17:41That looks like it comes with entrepreneurship and it does.
- 17:45And the shadow side to that, because there's always a light
- 17:49and there's always a dark. The dark side too.
- 17:51It is. You are in control and you have
- 17:55to hold your own parameters, you have to hold your own
- 18:00boundaries. You have to and get to decide
- 18:04what happens when. And that has to me felt recently
- 18:09really, really overwhelming. So to peek behind the curtain of
- 18:15what my business looks like, I say that I run like 3 different
- 18:21businesses. That's kind of how I structure.
- 18:23It's how my folders look on my Google Drive.
- 18:28I have a quote UN quote media business.
- 18:30So that is the podcast. I have an events business which
- 18:34are my all figured out events which currently happen in and
- 18:39around the greater Vancouver area.
- 18:41And then I have my coaching business, which is technically a
- 18:46global practice, as is the podcast.
- 18:48So I have three very, very different businesses.
- 18:52So the podcast is a beast of its own.
- 18:55Like it is, I know people say this on podcasts, and it's like,
- 18:58yeah, yeah, how much work can it be?
- 18:59It is an incredible amount of work, especially when you're
- 19:02somebody like myself who really cares about the quality and
- 19:06really cares about the output maybe coming from advertising,
- 19:10being on commercial shoots, like being close to the creative
- 19:14output and final deliverables for things like that.
- 19:16Like it matters to me so much, almost to my detriment.
- 19:19So if I wanted to, the podcast could be an absolute full time
- 19:23job in terms of time, not yet revenue, but we are getting
- 19:27there. Anyone want to sponsor the
- 19:28podcast? Let me know.
- 19:29Come chat. We are starting to take a
- 19:32partnership sponsored episodes and it is 2026.
- 19:37It's fun, it's going to be good. So that's the media podcast side
- 19:41at the business. Then there's the events, which
- 19:45are one of my most favorite things to do.
- 19:47And then there's the one to one coaching.
- 19:51So in terms of revenue, my 1:00 to 1:00 coaching is what brings
- 19:54in the most amount of money. My events bring me so much joy
- 20:00and a good amount of revenue. And the podcast is just getting
- 20:03started. And so the weird thing when I'm
- 20:05I bring all this up to say that like it's so important also to
- 20:09look at the different areas again of your calendar of your
- 20:15life and be like, what does each provide?
- 20:17It's got to provide something, right?
- 20:20It's like the friend who doesn't provide anything in the
- 20:25relationship or you know, relationship you've had in the
- 20:27past where you're like, if anything that drains me, you've
- 20:31got to really think about like the things that you're working
- 20:33on, the things that you're doing.
- 20:34Like what is it providing? It's like that nine to five job.
- 20:37Like if it's not providing you enjoyment, it's not providing
- 20:39you a sustainable living wage. If it's not providing you the
- 20:43experience for your next step, like it's got to give you
- 20:46something in return when it's taking your time and your
- 20:49energy. And so where I'm at right now is
- 20:54feeling scattered and I'm feeling like things are
- 20:59dribbling all over the place. There's an event here, There's a
- 21:02meeting here. There's a speaking engagement
- 21:05here, OK? I'm going to record the podcast
- 21:07here, OK? Doesn't work for that person
- 21:09here. It's going to happen here.
- 21:10And I've just been feeling like I was so excited to start the
- 21:14new year. I felt like it was going to be
- 21:16fresh. I was really going to have some,
- 21:19like, just really cool new rhythms and systems.
- 21:22And then time just gets away and I didn't really put in the
- 21:26systems properly in place to really feel like like I had a
- 21:32handle on like what was happening and when.
- 21:36And so you heard it here first. When I'm back from vacation, I'm
- 21:41almost treating the end of March as my reset time, my
- 21:44recalibration period. So that's starting in April.
- 21:47And then we'll have like April, May, June before the summer.
- 21:51Oh yeah, Q2, we'll say Q2 is when I am going to be testing
- 21:56out some new time blocking methods.
- 21:59Now for me time blocking doesn't work great on like a day-to-day
- 22:05basis. And I wonder if this resonates
- 22:07with the parents out there who most of which are you are all
- 22:11parents listening. I find that if I chalk the block
- 22:15my days and I try to time block things without any sort of
- 22:17flexibility and making it so that it is like this is what has
- 22:22to happen at this exact time. That doesn't work because we
- 22:26know it's a House of Cards. One thing happens you have to
- 22:29drop them off late to daycare. You got to know the doctor,
- 22:32whatever everything else in the day when you've time blocked, it
- 22:35really precisely falls. And then it creates even more
- 22:39chaos. And for me that has created more
- 22:41internal chaos and chaos in my relationship.
- 22:45And like just just for me, it doesn't work.
- 22:47For some people it works great. Depends on the type of job you
- 22:50have, depends on the arrangements you have in the
- 22:53household. So if you know X child is sick,
- 22:56what happens? What's your backup plan?
- 22:58What's your fall back, that sort of thing.
- 23:00But I find that what's been working really well is zooming
- 23:05out and saying, OK, I record podcasts in my studio downtown
- 23:10Vancouver once or twice a month. Here are the blocks giving a lot
- 23:15of advanced notice to people and saying, here are the 2-3 blocks
- 23:19coming up that I have pick 1. And I had a client, a beautiful
- 23:23client a couple of years ago who remarked that she loved that I
- 23:27did that with my VIP days. So I also host VIP days now.
- 23:31I actually host them either Wednesdays or Thursdays, but I
- 23:34said to her at that time it was I host my VIP days on
- 23:37Wednesdays. Here are the next Wednesdays
- 23:39that I have available. We have our VIP day from 10:00
- 23:43AM. We start with brunch and we will
- 23:44wrap at 3:00. And she was like, wow, I love
- 23:48that. I love that.
- 23:48That's like just the day. Like we're not going back and
- 23:51forth. You're not saying, ohe, pick a
- 23:53day, pick a time because of course it's always going to be
- 23:55the day and time that is most inconvenient for you.
- 23:58So why don't you start off and this is what I told myself, why
- 24:02don't you just create the calendar and create the
- 24:05availability that you really want.
- 24:08And that was such an unlock for me.
- 24:10Now to layer into this conversation is I've gotten
- 24:14really aware and familiar with my cycle recently.
- 24:16And I've definitely noticed that there are times in the month
- 24:20where I don't want to be back-to-back in meetings.
- 24:23I don't want to have two VIP days with clients in that week.
- 24:28I probably, if I can swing it, like would like to avoid having
- 24:33an event that I'm hosting or an event in a VIP day, like avoid
- 24:37huge, huge weeks when I'm in my luteal late luteal phase or
- 24:41during my period and go listen to my episode with Doctor Liza.
- 24:45I will link it in the show notes.
- 24:46She talked about your cycle and how you can use it to work with
- 24:50you versus against you and how you can start to really think
- 24:53about your calendar and your months and your weeks so that
- 24:57you're like setting yourself up for success.
- 25:02Ah, this is all stuff I know, but I have just like, let it
- 25:08slide. You know, life happens.
- 25:09I haven't been proactive. I haven't really been looking
- 25:12ahead. I've just been like, yeah, like
- 25:15just reacting, reacting, reacting, barely look at my
- 25:17schedule ahead of time. I'm looking on like Monday that
- 25:20morning and being like, oh, wow, this is what's happening this
- 25:23week versus being a bit more proactive.
- 25:27And I'm also somebody who likes spontaneity.
- 25:30Like I like having enough space to let things unfold.
- 25:35And so for me, making chockablock like really
- 25:38intensely scheduled weeks doesn't work.
- 25:40But if I zoom out, which I talk about all the time, if you zoom
- 25:44out and you look at like the week as a whole or you look at
- 25:48the week within the month and like you really zoom and be
- 25:52like, OK, there's 20 weekdays in this month.
- 25:56How many of those days do I want to do this?
- 25:59How many of those days would I want to have a date night?
- 26:01Do I want to see a friend this month, one to one?
- 26:04Do we want to go out for dinner with a couple?
- 26:05Do we want to have a family over?
- 26:07Like even these things are so important to think about.
- 26:10And I will recognize I like, well, have to obviously
- 26:14recognize that if you're listening and you were in a
- 26:16corporate job, sure, like some of your days might be like
- 26:20really out of your control. But I have a beautiful client
- 26:23who I think I've shared this story on the podcast before we
- 26:27were working together. It was actually I think a
- 26:29session she either won and it give away or something like
- 26:33that. I can't remember it was, but it
- 26:33was I think it was a 30 minute session.
- 26:36And by the end of it, we basically cracked the code on
- 26:39this huge block that she was facing, which was time.
- 26:42She felt like she was really stressed and struggling with
- 26:45time. She was not present, you know,
- 26:47watching her daughters like ballet lesson because she felt
- 26:51like she had to be working because she didn't have enough
- 26:52time during her day to actually do the damn work.
- 26:56We've all been there and she was in meetings all day and then
- 26:59felt like she had to do the actual work in the evenings.
- 27:03So what we did is we said, OK, when you're looking at the days
- 27:06like that, nothing is really movable because all these
- 27:09meetings have to go somewhere and you've got to block them in
- 27:11somewhere. However, we took a step back and
- 27:14then another step back and we zoomed out and we realized if
- 27:17she blocked off one afternoon every single week and got the
- 27:22enrollment of her team and her organization and said, OK, this
- 27:25is a block in my calendar. There's no meetings allowed at
- 27:29this time. Like no meetings allowed.
- 27:31And for her, it also wasn't time to be doing other things like
- 27:35medical appointments or whatever.
- 27:36This was like a work block, focused work.
- 27:39And what that did for her was make it so that the available
- 27:43times that she could be booked were every other day that week
- 27:46except for this, I think it was a Thursday afternoon, could not
- 27:50be booked. And guess what?
- 27:53It worked like people just made it work.
- 27:57So if you said I kind of, I don't know.
- 27:59I have like feelings about the word boundaries like, but for
- 28:02lack of a better phrase or word, I have not yet figured out what
- 28:05word I do like. But for lack of a better phrase,
- 28:09when you set your boundaries or you set your dream schedule,
- 28:12your ideal schedule, and you're like, OK, this is when I'm
- 28:14available. Here are a couple options like
- 28:17you've got, you've got 4 1/2 days to choose from.
- 28:21Choose one of those. Or I can meet you next week.
- 28:23There's 4 1/2 days to choose from there too.
- 28:25People make it work, and that is what I think I'm going to do.
- 28:32I am going to get better about implementing my Sunday calendar
- 28:36resets with my husband. We have gotten a bit better.
- 28:40We've gotten back into the groove of it.
- 28:41It's definitely one of those things that I always suggest to
- 28:44people to implement when things are feeling sticky and everybody
- 28:47always like falls off and then comes back together, but do a
- 28:50calendar reset with the partner. It is so, so helpful.
- 28:55And what we used to do is we used to just look at the week
- 28:57ahead. But what we started doing every
- 28:59so often, like every couple of weeks is we'll actually look at
- 29:03the next month or like 4 to six weeks ahead just to see like
- 29:07what's on the horizon. We won't go day by day, minute
- 29:09by minute, but we will be like, OK, is there anything we want to
- 29:13do in the next month or so? Do we want to go to Whistler or
- 29:15do we want to, I don't know, like have a family over?
- 29:19Like we all know that it's really hard to plan with our
- 29:21friends because everyone has such these schedules.
- 29:24And so like, OK, those are things you have to book in
- 29:26advance. And so we've started doing that
- 29:28and I'm going to be doing that calendar reset for myself where
- 29:32weekly I'm going to look at my calendar for the week ahead and
- 29:36in a detailed way. And then I'm going to look at
- 29:38my, say, next four to six weeks and be like, OK, do these blocks
- 29:42still make sense? Do do I need to add more podcast
- 29:45recording times? Like am I short on episodes or
- 29:47do I have too many? When am I doing the work?
- 29:51When am I meeting people? When am I leaving space for like
- 29:53connection, business development, meeting new
- 29:56clients, things like that? So OK, that was actually way
- 30:00longer than I thought it was gonna be, but these are my
- 30:03thoughts on the old calendar. It is not a new conversation.
- 30:08It is not a new issue that parents are facing, it is just a
- 30:13different context. We are in a new stage of life.
- 30:17We are all adults adulting for the first time in our lives.
- 30:20And so we've got to give ourselves the grace that they
- 30:23don't have to have this figured out, but we can make tweaks
- 30:26along the way and we can recalibrate.
- 30:28So this is what I'm going to be doing.
- 30:30I'm going to be calendar resetting with my partner, with
- 30:34my husband, Scotty. We'll do a weekly, We'll look
- 30:38out to the, you know, four to six weeks ahead.
- 30:40Personally, I'm going to be doing that in my business and
- 30:42I'm going to be testing out like for real this time.
- 30:46I'm going to be testing out the calendar blocks on that like
- 30:50monthly basis. So I'm going to look to see, you
- 30:53know, how many times a month am I doing this, how many times a
- 30:56week am I doing this? And I'm going to try it out.
- 31:00So I will keep you posted. I'll give you another update,
- 31:04but I am feeling excited to have a bit of a pause so that I can
- 31:11recalibrate. And if you are in the middle of
- 31:13a pause, if you're on a spring break, March break, if you're
- 31:17listening to this a bit later and you're like, whatever, it's
- 31:19a Tuesday, I'm ready for a pause.
- 31:21Then I implore you to also think about your own schedule.
- 31:25Think about your relationship with time.
- 31:27Think about what's working and what's not working.
- 31:29You actually might be listening to this and be like wow, I
- 31:34completely disagree with everything you're saying.
- 31:37That's not true for me. In which case that's amazing
- 31:41because that is like completely solidifying for you that the
- 31:46opposite might be true that you do love rigidity, that you are
- 31:50obsessed with Georgia. And I'm looking at you, you
- 31:52know, like you have like really planned plans really far in
- 31:57advance. And I know that works for you.
- 31:59So if you or somebody who is like me and you want to come
- 32:04with me, try out this, this like kind of, we'll call it month
- 32:08blocking or week blocking, then let me know how it goes.
- 32:12Find me on Instagram at all figured out, Andrea.
- 32:15And that's where I'm most active.
- 32:17I would say if you liked this episode, please share it with a
- 32:20friend. We are in a growth spurt on the
- 32:23podcast. We are growing, we are reaching
- 32:27new heights, we are reaching new audiences and it's just the
- 32:31start. So I really, really, really
- 32:34would love to ask you if you are a listener of the show and
- 32:37you've not yet left a review on Apple Podcasts or, and giving it
- 32:44five stars, those little stars, it is so hard to find it.
- 32:47If you need help finding it, let me know.
- 32:49I will make you a little screen recording because it's very hard
- 32:51to find where you leave the review and where you give the
- 32:53stars. And if you could also, even if
- 32:56you don't listen on Spotify, if you could also go over to
- 32:58Spotify and give five stars there, leave a comment on an
- 33:03episode, whatever you can do. I honestly thought that reviews
- 33:09and stars and all those things has gone by the wayside.
- 33:13But I have been working with a wonderful new podcast manager
- 33:16who is opening my mind to what is possible for this show.
- 33:19And she said no, they are very much still important.
- 33:22So I would so, so, so appreciate if you could do those two things
- 33:28for me. Apple, Spotify, and if you're
- 33:31feeling extra generous, hop over to YouTube, hit subscribe.
- 33:35Like if you of the videos, all of these episodes are now live
- 33:39on YouTube all figured out Andrea over there as well.
- 33:43And I want to say thank you for listening to this episode.
- 33:47And I cannot wait to be in your ears in a few days.
- 33:50Thank you. Bye.