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Why do narcissists get so upset when you get sick? · The Mental Healness Podcast

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  What is going on? Beautiful people.
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  Today we're talking about why so many narcissistic people get
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  angry at you when you get sick around them or when you need
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  their help if you're new here. My name is Lee Hammock.
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  I'm a clinically diagnosed narcissist.
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  And welcome to another episode of The Narcissist Code.
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  Boom. Welcome back.
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  Welcome back. Welcome back.
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  Yes, yes, yes. Y'all.
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  I know a lot of people are going to vibe with this video right
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  here because it's just the truth that a lot of people experience
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  not every, you know, You know what I said?
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  A lot of people, You notice that I didn't say all people that are
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  in a toxic relationship with a narcissistic person.
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  Because there's a reason I didn't say all because I don't
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  speak for all narcissists. Y'all get like y'all be seeing
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  people. I've seen people complaining
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  about me all the time online. Like like leading up people out
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  like God boy. Anyways, y'all, yes, a lot of
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  narcissistic people, like, truly, A lot of narcissistic
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  people get angry as hell as you when you get sick.
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  And there's a reason why. So let me preface this by saying
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  this. Are there narcissists that will
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  be taking that will take care of you when you are sick?
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  Yes, there are a lot of narcissists, actually.
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  They will take care of you. They will step.
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  They will step up to the plate to be there for you, to feed you
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  soup, to give you that. They take care of you when you
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  need them, right? But it's always a price to pay.
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  They never forget what they do for you.
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  They don't. They.
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  They always look. They don't forget what they do
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  for you. So even if they are there for
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  you, they want to hold it against you later on, you are
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  going to repay that debt later on if you get sick or hurt or
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  injured or just, you know, whatever happens to you,
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  something happens to you that they have to take care of you
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  and they have to step up to the plate and they do it.
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  They expect the praise of praises, not.
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  It's not something that they're supposed to do because they're
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  married to you or they're your, they're your parent, right?
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  Could be a parent doing this. They make it feel like you're
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  always going to be indebted to them for doing this.
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  Like, hey, thanks for being there for me.
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  You're in debt to me. What?
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  You know, you owe me a debt. What?
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  You know what I mean? Yeah.
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  This is a very unique place to be in.
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  You're dealing with toxic, narcissistic people.
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  It really, really is. That's why I tell people like
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  this is the dynamic that so many people will face.
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  Like they will. You will owe them a debt for
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  taking care of you. But on the flip side of things,
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  the angry, narcissistic person gets mad at you for being sick.
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  They get upset at you for getting sick, especially in the
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  day, especially in this day and age where we got all kinds of
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  back bacteria and viruses in the air that make people sick.
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  Everybody's coughing and sneezing and farting everywhere.
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  It is like you just don't know what people got.
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  You know, you don't know what people have going on.
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  So if you get sick to the point where you have to stay out of
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  work, where they have to pick the kids up, their schedule
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  changes up one ounce, they get angry as hell at you, yo.
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  You will see. If you get sick around a
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  narcissist, you will see their lack of empathy kick in.
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  If they have a lack of empathy, you will see it kick into high
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  gear right now because they're going to act like they don't
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  care. You know why they get so angry?
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  Because your sickness, your illness, your ailments
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  inconvenience them, you're you become an inconvenience to their
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  life. You make my life harder because
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  you are sick. Even if, yeah, even if it's
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  something uncontrollable. You have an accident at work,
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  you get into a car accident, Lord forbid.
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  You know something happens to you going back and forth
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  somewhere, like you just get hurt and then that's it for you.
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  You know, that becomes it for you right there.
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  It really does. And then, like, they get angry
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  at you, something that's out of your control.
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  You get in the car accident and break your leg.
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  So you can't go to work. You can't walk.
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  They got to help you use the bathroom and stuff like that.
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  Oh my goodness. Learn how to goddamn drive.
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  Damn. See, I got to do all this stuff
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  because you can't drive. Damn, I didn't do all this stuff
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  because you sick right Now. You don't know how to wash your
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  hands. You don't know how to, you know,
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  put a mask on. You don't know how to do this.
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  You don't have to do that. It's all going to be your fault.
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  You know they will blame you for being sick like you're you
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  become an inconvenience to them. Like, y'all this is not me
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  called saying your existence and it is an inconvenience.
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  It's your illness. The fact that they might have to
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  step up and do extra around the house, the fact, the fact that
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  they might have to do more because of inconvenience to
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  them. They like.
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  Like a lot of narcissists like to kind of stick to a schedule,
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  even if that schedule is boring. But not necessarily a schedule,
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  a routine. Yeah, not necessarily a
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  schedule. Some narcissists are horrible
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  with schedules, but they like to have a certain routine.
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  You can. You change up that routine.
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  Your kids change up that routine.
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  That's not just you. It could be your children.
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  They change it through that routine.
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  You will see the lack of empathy kicking with the kids too.
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  And it's sad to say that this happens quite a bit when
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  children are involved. Kids get hurt, kids get sick.
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  Oh my goodness, here we go again.
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  Kids can't stay healthy. Dirty ass kids, you know, Petri
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  dish, Petri dish. Kids are Petri dish.
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  They'll start blaming the kids for what's going on.
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  It's a very unique space to kind of be in until it exists.
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  When you're dealing with a narcissistic person, it's that
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  mindset. Y'all like you mess up my
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  routine sometimes. Y'all I'm going to be.
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  I'm be real with you. I'll be real with you sometimes
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  in this space, like, they won't take care of you.
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  Like some of them will take care of you out of spite and be angry
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  about doing it and make it. They'll tell you that they're
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  that you owe them or you owe me. Can never say I did nothing for
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  you. Oh, I got to do this.
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  Got to do this for you. But they'll do it.
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  Some of them won't do it at all. They'll leave you to fend for
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  yourself. I've heard y'all when I'm doing
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  my one on ones I resume. I've heard some pretty horrible
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  stories about people having to fend for themselves When you're
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  dealing with a narcissist, right?
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  People that have that make you fend for yourself like you can't
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  get up, use the bathroom. They make you use the bathroom
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  on yourself and then they get mad because they have to come
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  clean it up or they won't clean it up.
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  They let you sit in your own, like, excrement.
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  I've heard some pretty horrible stories where they feel like,
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  well, you are, you need to get better fast.
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  I ain't got time to be doing this.
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  You inconvenience them and they make you stay.
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  Look, they punish you for becoming an inconvenience to
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  their lives and it's damn near, yeah, for lack of a better word,
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  is damn near evil. Like I said, when you have this
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  this abject lack of empathy, it is damn near evil because they
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  sort of punish you and treating you badly because you had
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  something happen to you that was out of your control.
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  You can't you can't not, you can't stop catching a cold.
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  You see what I'm saying? You can't stop doing this.
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  You can't stop doing that. You know you can't like they
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  they they you can't. I'm just being realistic you
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  could like yo it's a it's A and just in the mind of a narcissist
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  can you all know I have narcissist personality disorder.
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  You know, so it's just, even in my old days, you know, in my old
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  days, like, I used to be there disconnecting when when my
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  people were sitting around me, I used to hate it.
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  I would do it, You know, I would still take care of my wife and
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  my kids or whoever was around me.
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  They were sick. I would still do it.
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  But I'd be the angry narcissist that did it out of spite because
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  I didn't want people to just like, oh, he, he really don't
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  care about his kids. He don't care about his family
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  or whatever. So he's not taking care of him.
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  Like, at least I did that. You know, it made me feel like I
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  wasn't a bad person, even though I was angry and, you know, in a
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  different place mentally, I would still take care of them
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  while they were sick. I would be angry doing it now.
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  Let him know, you know, which is not right at all.
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  But I'm just telling you this, me being open, this me being
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  vulnerable tell you this. But like, I would feel, you
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  know, now I feel horrible talking about it out loud, but
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  that's how my mind worked. This is how I was a program, you
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  know, it's just like narcissist need a deprogramming in order to
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  get better. You have to kind of deprogram
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  the the your central nervous system or your, you know, your
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  brain after so long of being reactionary, after so long of
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  being toxic, after so long of acting like you don't care.
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  You like you have to reprogram yourself in these spaces, you
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  know? Yeah, I wasn't like I said, I
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  would definitely be the one, the one to take care of the people,
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  but I'll be angry doing it. But there's some people with a
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  lack of empathy that they won't take care of you.
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  Y'all, if you need extra help because one of your kids is sick
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  or hurt or something like that, they get angry as hell.
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  They do that. They'll just leave you to your
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  own vices. And this is the thing right here
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  that's going to suck. I'll say this too.
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  There are some narcissists that will discard you if you get sick
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  or hurt. They will discard their kids if
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  they get sick or hurt. And some of these sicknesses,
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  like, when I say sicknesses, I don't just mean like physical
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  things. I mean like mental health
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  ailments as well. Like the child might be autistic
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  or on the spectrum or you know have you know bipolar or
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  something along those lines ADHD something, you know but the the
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  narcissist doesn't look at them as as perfect.
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  They'll discard those kids because of that.
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  Because now I now I'm ashamed because I think I caused that
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  because of my genetics. But I'm also it's an
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  inconvenience to me for me to have to do extra.
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  I don't want to push around a wheelchair.
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  You see how how equal that sounds?
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  Like they don't push around a wheelchair, they'll discard
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  those kids or you and go try to start over from scratch.
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  And do people accept them into their life after they do that?
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  Yeah. There are a bunch of people who
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  will take in, who will, you know, house and be with an
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  abusive, toxic, narcissistic person that has, that has
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  abandoned their entire family. I see it happening all the time.
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  Like they left you with six kids and one of them you you have a
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  couple on the spectrum and you have to fend for yourself.
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  They're like, yeah, they got it and they they moved on, got
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  married having they have a new kid.
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  They have a kid on the way right now like goodness gracious then,
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  so yo again, for lack of a better word, evil.
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  You don't think of a better word than evil.
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  Drop it in the comment section. But that's how that's how it
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  looks sometimes. That's how it feels.
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  That's how it's presented sometimes it's like it looks
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  damn, it looks evil, like damn so many people.
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  Just the the hearts are just, you know the hearts are damn,
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  they're not there. The hearts are not existed
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  within that space. So it's a very unique dynamic to
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  be a part of. So that's why I tell people like
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  you have to heal, you have to grow.
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  You have to do what's best for you in these situations.
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  If you have a narcissist that has never taken care of you when
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  you get sick or gets angry when you get sick, like don't expect
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  it in the future. You know this is preparing you
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  like prepare for some. If you can find somebody else to
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  help you try to do that as well. You know, I know everybody can't
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  just leave the relationship. I doesn't knock me just trying
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  to like get out of there. I know everybody can't leave.
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  So see if you can find somebody else to help you out as well.
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  But but again, this is what happens sometimes.
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  And if you do find somebody to help you, the narcissist gets
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  mad. They get mad because you you you
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  embarrassed by asking somebody else to help you.
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  It's a yeah, it's damn near a not a no win situation.
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  It's like you can't win because every time you try to do
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  something, they get angry, they push back, they fight back, they
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  make you feel a certain type of way.
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  You can damn near not win these situations and they can be damn
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  near horrible, right. Seriously.
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  Why? He's asking somebody for help.
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  You embarrassing me like you didn't help me.
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  You said you weren't going to help me.
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  I was just going to get around to it.
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  You didn't give me a chance. Oh my goodness.
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  So now you arguing about not giving them a chance when they
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  didn't even try to step up to the damn plate and this and they
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  but y'all know the flip side of it.
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  They expect you to take care of them when they're sick or
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  they'll fake not being sick. They'll just try.
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  They'll try to downplay what they have going on.
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  I do another video about narcissists sick, being sick.
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  But they'll try to downplay it. So they and they try to
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  condition you that if you have a cough or something like that,
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  you got to kind of cough in silence, you know you like you
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  get so conditioned to be fearful of this person did you have to.
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  You can't even cough correctly. You got to cough in silence.
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  Like your your face turned red. You over there got sweat and
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  tears in your eyes. You know, you're like, are you
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  sick? Your eyes watery like, no, I'm
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  not sick. You sure?
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  Yeah, I'm good. Interior with the two nuns about
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  to explode, you know. But anyways, y'all take care of
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  yourselves, you know. You take that vitamin C to get
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  less colds or vitamin D whatever it is you know, to protect
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  yourself, protect your peace. Y'all, I'm here if you need me.
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  You know what? If I'm at join my newsletter.
• 12:25
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• 12:27
  Working on the website right now.
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• 12:32
  Make sure you subscribe to the channel as well.
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  Let's hope this is out Peace. Thank you so much for making it
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  to the end of my video. You are a mental illness
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  Rockstar and I appreciate you for being here.
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  If you haven't already, make sure to click on the screen to
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• 12:46
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• 12:48
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• 12:50
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  out. Thank you.
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  I will see you in the next video.
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  Peace.