Latest / Something Extra / Solving the Right Problems w/ Sean Glaze

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Solving the Right Problems w/ Sean Glaze · Something Extra

• 0:02
  Lisa Nichols: Chromosomes.
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  Lisa Nichols: Little strands of nucleic acids and proteins are the fundamental genetic instructions
• 0:08
  Lisa Nichols: that tell us who we are at birth.
• 0:10
  Lisa Nichols: Most people are born with forty six chromosomes, but each year in the United
• 0:14
  Lisa Nichols: States, about six thousand people are born with an extra chromosome, making them a
• 0:18
  Lisa Nichols: person with Down syndrome.
• 0:20
  Lisa Nichols: If you've ever encountered someone with Down syndrome, you know that they are some
• 0:24
  Lisa Nichols: of the kindest, most joyful people you will ever meet.
• 0:27
  Lisa Nichols: They truly have something extra.
• 0:30
  Lisa Nichols: My name is Lisa Nichols, and for thirty years, I have been both the
• 0:34
  Lisa Nichols: CEO of Technology Partners and the mother to Ali.
• 0:38
  Lisa Nichols: Ali has something extra in every sense of the word.
• 0:41
  Lisa Nichols: I have been blessed to be by her side as she impacts everyone she
• 0:45
  Lisa Nichols: meets.
• 0:46
  Lisa Nichols: Through these two important roles as CEO and mother to Ally, I have
• 0:50
  Lisa Nichols: witnessed countless life lessons that have fundamentally changed the way I look at the
• 0:54
  Lisa Nichols: world.
• 0:55
  Lisa Nichols: While you may not have an extra chromosome, every leader has something extra that
• 0:59
  Lisa Nichols: defines who you are.
• 1:00
  Lisa Nichols: Join me as I explore the something extra in leaders from all walks of
• 1:04
  Lisa Nichols: life and discover how that difference in each of them has made a difference
• 1:08
  Lisa Nichols: in their companies, their families, their communities, and in themselves.
• 1:12
  Lisa Nichols: If you like this episode today, please go to Apple Podcasts or wherever you
• 1:16
  Lisa Nichols: listen and leave us a five star rating.
• 1:19
  Lisa Nichols: I'm thrilled to have Sean Glaze on the show today.
• 1:22
  Lisa Nichols: Sean is a speaker, author, and the owner of Great Results Team
• 1:26
  Lisa Nichols: Building.
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  Lisa Nichols: Well, Sean, welcome to the Something Extra podcast.
• 1:31
  Lisa Nichols: I am so delighted to spend this time with you today.
• 1:34
  Lisa Nichols: Thank you so much for making the time.
• 1:36
  Sean Glaze: Lisa, I'm so excited to spend the time with you and looking forward to
• 1:39
  Sean Glaze: a great conversation about leadership and culture and maybe a little something extra.
• 1:43
  Lisa Nichols: Yeah.
• 1:43
  Lisa Nichols: That's right.
• 1:44
  Lisa Nichols: That's right.
• 1:44
  Lisa Nichols: And I know that you've got a lot of, experience in this area, but
• 1:48
  Lisa Nichols: we're gonna get get into it.
• 1:50
  Lisa Nichols: I'm just gonna tell our audience just a little bit.
• 1:53
  Lisa Nichols: You know, you're a speaker, author, a founder of Great Results Team Building.
• 1:57
  Lisa Nichols: You have a background in education and coaching, but you've taken
• 2:01
  Lisa Nichols: your lessons from the court to the corporate world, and you've you're a prolific
• 2:05
  Lisa Nichols: author.
• 2:06
  Lisa Nichols: You got five leadership parables, which I love, including the unexpected
• 2:10
  Lisa Nichols: leader.
• 2:11
  Lisa Nichols: We'll stay we'll we'll talk about some of these, The Unexpected Leader, Staying Coachable,
• 2:15
  Lisa Nichols: and your latest book that just came out, right, in June, What Effective Leaders
• 2:19
  Lisa Nichols: Do.
• 2:21
  Lisa Nichols: And I have that book as well.
• 2:24
  Sean Glaze: Woo hoo.
• 2:24
  Lisa Nichols: And and should have, you know what?
• 2:26
  Lisa Nichols: We at the end, we will take a picture with both of us holding
• 2:30
  Lisa Nichols: our books.
• 2:31
  Lisa Nichols: Okay?
• 2:32
  Lisa Nichols: Yeah.
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  Lisa Nichols: Great, great book.
• 2:34
  Lisa Nichols: And that that just came out in June.
• 2:37
  Lisa Nichols: You've got so much wisdom to share.
• 2:38
  Lisa Nichols: Before we get into all of that, I really would love to
• 2:42
  Lisa Nichols: talk a little bit about growing up.
• 2:44
  Lisa Nichols: Where did you grow up?
• 2:45
  Lisa Nichols: What did you like to do as a little boy?
• 2:49
  Sean Glaze: Growing up, again, I I would absolutely I think that's a
• 2:53
  Sean Glaze: fantastic question.
• 2:54
  Sean Glaze: It's one that I'll often ask because, you how you got where you're at
• 2:57
  Sean Glaze: and and what was your childhood like?
• 2:59
  Sean Glaze: Tell me something about that.
• 3:00
  Sean Glaze: Those are pretty powerful questions to build some connection and appreciation for who somebody
• 3:04
  Sean Glaze: is.
• 3:04
  Sean Glaze: And my I was probably overblessed, not necessarily
• 3:08
  Sean Glaze: because my family had a whole lot of financial security or success.
• 3:12
  Sean Glaze: We, we honestly struggled when I was younger.
• 3:15
  Sean Glaze: But I had a neighborhood full of kids who were around my age.
• 3:19
  Sean Glaze: And, you know, of course, you know, goodness, back in the early to mid
• 3:23
  Sean Glaze: eighties when I'm, you know, out playing as a teenager, it was, you you
• 3:27
  Sean Glaze: leave in the morning and come back home at night, and it was Nerf
• 3:30
  Sean Glaze: football and wiffle ball and fishing and hiking and who knows how many
• 3:34
  Sean Glaze: things with again, it was about, you know, probably a dozen guys within
• 3:38
  Sean Glaze: a year or two of each other.
• 3:39
  Sean Glaze: And, between that and when Atari and Nintendo first came out,
• 3:43
  Sean Glaze: we stayed pretty busy.
• 3:45
  Lisa Nichols: Right.
• 3:45
  Lisa Nichols: Do you remember Pong?
• 3:47
  Sean Glaze: Yeah.
• 3:48
  Sean Glaze: Pong was that very first one before they had the block headed football Atari
• 3:51
  Sean Glaze: and, you know, the whole the whole thing that, that has now led to
• 3:55
  Sean Glaze: you know, it's unbelievable how how real the stuff is that my son gets
• 3:58
  Sean Glaze: to enjoy.
• 3:59
  Lisa Nichols: The gaming industry.
• 4:00
  Lisa Nichols: Yes.
• 4:01
  Lisa Nichols: It has definitely changed and evolved.
• 4:03
  Lisa Nichols: Well, you sound like you had an idyllic childhood.
• 4:05
  Lisa Nichols: My husband did too.
• 4:08
  Lisa Nichols: He says the same thing.
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  Lisa Nichols: He grew up I kinda grew up more in a rural area.
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  Lisa Nichols: My parents had land, and so I I grew up with goats goats
• 4:15
  Lisa Nichols: and horses.
• 4:17
  Sean Glaze: Yeah.
• 4:17
  Sean Glaze: Yeah.
• 4:17
  Lisa Nichols: But that was okay.
• 4:18
  Lisa Nichols: Good for you.
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  Lisa Nichols: I loved my goats.
• 4:21
  Lisa Nichols: I loved my goats.
• 4:23
  Lisa Nichols: Yeah, bottle fed some of them.
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  Lisa Nichols: You know, those were awesome memories.
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  Lisa Nichols: My best friend, though, lived a couple miles away.
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  Lisa Nichols: And, of course, my parents would not allow me to ride my bike to
• 4:33
  Lisa Nichols: your house, but my husband grew up like you did, a neighborhood
• 4:37
  Lisa Nichols: full of kids, and he would say the same thing.
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  Lisa Nichols: He said they would leave.
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  Lisa Nichols: They would do all these adventures.
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  Lisa Nichols: They would make forts in the woods, and, you know, mom would the mom
• 4:46
  Lisa Nichols: would not see
• 4:47
  Sean Glaze: them until
• 4:48
  Lisa Nichols: dinner time.
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  Lisa Nichols: You know?
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  Lisa Nichols: That was it.
• 4:50
  Lisa Nichols: You know?
• 4:51
  Lisa Nichols: But, such an idyllic childhood.
• 4:54
  Lisa Nichols: Well, I know let's let's talk about this for a minute because I know
• 4:57
  Lisa Nichols: I think I read somewhere where you initially wanted to be an attorney.
• 5:00
  Lisa Nichols: Is that correct?
• 5:01
  Sean Glaze: Wow.
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  Sean Glaze: And you're doing a little bit of research here.
• 5:03
  Sean Glaze: Yeah.
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  Sean Glaze: I actually I went to Georgia Southern, which is obviously a good decision because
• 5:06
  Sean Glaze: that's where I met my wife and somehow convinced her to marry me.
• 5:10
  Sean Glaze: She's a nurse, but it was at Georgia Southern.
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  Sean Glaze: I majored in English because there's no pre law degree.
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  Sean Glaze: And I was gonna be an attorney because growing up and not having much,
• 5:18
  Sean Glaze: you know, there are different paths.
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  Sean Glaze: You think.
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  Sean Glaze: The one that I knew that would allow me and being able to make
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  Sean Glaze: an argument and be logical would be as an attorney.
• 5:27
  Sean Glaze: And I did not get accepted to University of Georgia Law School as darn
• 5:31
  Sean Glaze: dogs, and I was, you know, going to meet with the admissions counselor, and
• 5:35
  Sean Glaze: she explained the LSATs are good, but your GPA is a little bit lower
• 5:38
  Sean Glaze: than what the median is for this year's class.
• 5:41
  Sean Glaze: Reapply next year.
• 5:42
  Sean Glaze: And I didn't know what I was gonna do.
• 5:44
  Sean Glaze: And, sometimes I think Providence finds a way to put you where you're meant
• 5:48
  Sean Glaze: to be.
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  Sean Glaze: And, it was because of that that I went and met with my high
• 5:52
  Sean Glaze: school soccer coach, at the high school I had graduated from, and we were
• 5:56
  Sean Glaze: gonna go and have lunch together.
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  Sean Glaze: And I bumped into the principal at that school who had been an administrator
• 6:01
  Sean Glaze: when I was a student.
• 6:02
  Sean Glaze: And, she asked what I was up to, had, you know, graduated degree in
• 6:06
  Sean Glaze: English, didn't get into law school, but I'll be reapplying.
• 6:10
  Sean Glaze: And she kinda cocked her head and raised an eyebrow and said, you know,
• 6:13
  Sean Glaze: Sean, we need English teachers.
• 6:15
  Sean Glaze: And, of course, I laughed right out of the office.
• 6:17
  Sean Glaze: Miss Jackson, there's no way.
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  Sean Glaze: I'm no teacher for sure.
• 6:20
  Sean Glaze: And the very next day after talking with my coach, I was convinced that
• 6:23
  Sean Glaze: that was something that I should consider to do for a year before I
• 6:26
  Sean Glaze: reapplied.
• 6:28
  Sean Glaze: And, my wife was still finishing up nursing school at the time.
• 6:32
  Sean Glaze: And so, it was something that I honestly fell into
• 6:36
  Sean Glaze: never having the intention of sticking with it.
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  Sean Glaze: And, and I remember having that long distance call.
• 6:41
  Sean Glaze: There was no FaceTime or Zoom back in, you know, nineteen ninety three.
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  Sean Glaze: But I remember having that call with my, you know, soon to be wife,
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  Sean Glaze: and telling her around Thanksgiving, I know where I'm supposed to be, and and
• 6:52
  Sean Glaze: I don't need to reapply.
• 6:53
  Sean Glaze: And I love the classroom and obviously love the locker room.
• 6:56
  Sean Glaze: It was the locker room that led to what I'm doing now.
• 6:59
  Sean Glaze: Mhmm.
• 7:00
  Lisa Nichols: Yes.
• 7:01
  Lisa Nichols: And you did that, what, for twenty five years.
• 7:04
  Lisa Nichols: Is that right, Sean?
• 7:05
  Lisa Nichols: About twenty eight total.
• 7:06
  Lisa Nichols: Twenty eight total.
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  Lisa Nichols: You're a teacher
• 7:09
  Sean Glaze: and a as a speaker.
• 7:10
  Sean Glaze: Yeah.
• 7:11
  Lisa Nichols: That is just so incredible.
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  Lisa Nichols: I know you you learned a lot.
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  Lisa Nichols: You know, you learned a lot during that time as a teacher.
• 7:18
  Lisa Nichols: You know, so you let me ask you that.
• 7:20
  Lisa Nichols: So, like, you've coached everything from cross country to basketball to tennis.
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  Lisa Nichols: You know, what did those early years of teaching show you about leadership
• 7:29
  Lisa Nichols: and adaptability?
• 7:33
  Sean Glaze: I think that as a coach and, again, I got into coaching basketball not
• 7:36
  Sean Glaze: because I had a great background in basketball other than playing in the neighborhood.
• 7:41
  Sean Glaze: I really grew up playing soccer.
• 7:42
  Sean Glaze: And because I went back and I was teaching for the first few years
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  Sean Glaze: at the high school that I had attended, many of the teachers knew me,
• 7:50
  Sean Glaze: some for good and some for bad.
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  Sean Glaze: And, one of my algebra teachers who was the high school head coach
• 7:56
  Sean Glaze: of the basketball program pulled me aside before the year began.
• 8:00
  Sean Glaze: Hey, Sean.
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  Sean Glaze: We need a freshman coach.
• 8:02
  Sean Glaze: Would you be interested?
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  Sean Glaze: And, of course, you know, my wife is still down finishing up, and I
• 8:06
  Sean Glaze: didn't have anything else to do in the afternoons.
• 8:07
  Sean Glaze: And I'd already agreed to do cross country and soccer, which is what I'd
• 8:11
  Sean Glaze: done mostly when I was actually a student.
• 8:13
  Sean Glaze: And I said, you know, coach Morgan, I don't know anything about basketball.
• 8:17
  Sean Glaze: He's like, John, I know the type of person you are.
• 8:18
  Sean Glaze: You'll be a good teacher.
• 8:20
  Sean Glaze: I can teach you the ups and noes.
• 8:22
  Sean Glaze: And I think that whether it is, you know, literature or basketball
• 8:26
  Sean Glaze: or leadership or business,
• 8:29
  Sean Glaze: ultimately, our job as leaders is to be good teachers.
• 8:32
  Sean Glaze: And and that's how I kinda describe myself.
• 8:35
  Sean Glaze: I'm still a teacher.
• 8:35
  Sean Glaze: It's just in a different venue with different students and organizations that bring you
• 8:40
  Sean Glaze: in for maybe a different curriculum.
• 8:42
  Sean Glaze: But I learned about leadership maybe less in my literature classroom
• 8:46
  Sean Glaze: than I did in the basketball locker room because it's in the basketball locker
• 8:50
  Sean Glaze: room that early on, you think everything's about x's and o's.
• 8:53
  Sean Glaze: I mean, I got a really good play, and we're gonna be great because
• 8:56
  Sean Glaze: I've got a great play.
• 8:57
  Sean Glaze: And how many leaders, how many people in the audience listening now think,
• 9:01
  Sean Glaze: man, we built a great strategy.
• 9:02
  Sean Glaze: We've got good x's and o's.
• 9:04
  Sean Glaze: We're gonna be just fine.
• 9:06
  Sean Glaze: That's only one of three necessary areas, that leaders
• 9:10
  Sean Glaze: need to sustain success.
• 9:12
  Sean Glaze: And, you know, with basketball and business, I think that, you have to have
• 9:16
  Sean Glaze: strategy.
• 9:17
  Sean Glaze: You have to have talent.
• 9:18
  Sean Glaze: Everybody's in the talent acquisition business.
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  Sean Glaze: But I failed early as a coach because I thought it was all about
• 9:24
  Sean Glaze: talent and strategy, and I neglected that third thing, which is culture.
• 9:27
  Sean Glaze: And, obviously, that's what I spent the rest of my life building.
• 9:30
  Lisa Nichols: Mhmm.
• 9:31
  Lisa Nichols: Yeah.
• 9:31
  Lisa Nichols: And I yeah.
• 9:32
  Lisa Nichols: I've read that.
• 9:33
  Lisa Nichols: You said, you know, that most think, oh, it's strategy.
• 9:36
  Lisa Nichols: Right?
• 9:37
  Lisa Nichols: That's my number one priority.
• 9:38
  Lisa Nichols: And you said, no.
• 9:39
  Lisa Nichols: The number one priority needs to be the culture.
• 9:42
  Lisa Nichols: Yeah.
• 9:42
  Lisa Nichols: So I love that.
• 9:44
  Lisa Nichols: Well, your first book was called the unexpected leader,
• 9:48
  Lisa Nichols: and, really, it started out as a story that you wrote for your players.
• 9:52
  Sean Glaze: You have gone back and done a little bit of prep.
• 9:54
  Sean Glaze: I'm, I'm very much impressed and a little bit, unsure
• 9:58
  Sean Glaze: whether I should be afraid of how much digging you've done.
• 10:03
  Lisa Nichols: I promise there's not anything that's gonna be too embarrassing for you.
• 10:07
  Sean Glaze: As a high school coach, you know, obviously, teaching literature and being, you know,
• 10:11
  Sean Glaze: aware of the impact of stories,
• 10:15
  Sean Glaze: I wanted to share something with my players that would help to give them
• 10:19
  Sean Glaze: the foundational understanding of how much impact they could have
• 10:23
  Sean Glaze: and that leadership wasn't a title.
• 10:25
  Sean Glaze: Leadership wasn't a position.
• 10:27
  Sean Glaze: Leadership is a choice that we make to have an influence on the people
• 10:30
  Sean Glaze: and the things that we care about.
• 10:32
  Sean Glaze: And, you know, leading without a title is really what the story was about
• 10:35
  Sean Glaze: initially.
• 10:36
  Sean Glaze: And then as I started to get involved with organizations, do more corporate work,
• 10:40
  Sean Glaze: I realized that that story, although it is certainly focused upon basketball, it
• 10:44
  Sean Glaze: is something that, you know, pretty much anybody in organization can read and apply
• 10:48
  Sean Glaze: because leadership and, again, influence isn't based on title or position.
• 10:53
  Sean Glaze: It's based on, you know, that, you know, intention and passion.
• 10:56
  Lisa Nichols: Mhmm.
• 10:57
  Lisa Nichols: Yeah.
• 10:58
  Lisa Nichols: This this might be of interest to you.
• 11:01
  Lisa Nichols: Did you ever watch the the series Ted Lasso?
• 11:04
  Sean Glaze: Absolutely.
• 11:05
  Sean Glaze: Huge fan.
• 11:06
  Sean Glaze: Right.
• 11:06
  Lisa Nichols: A huge fan.
• 11:07
  Lisa Nichols: Jenny and I, you know, my EA that you have met,
• 11:11
  Lisa Nichols: we love that show.
• 11:13
  Lisa Nichols: And so Donnie Campbell, the basketball coach that
• 11:17
  Lisa Nichols: Ted Lasso was actually, you know, inspired,
• 11:21
  Lisa Nichols: Ted Lasso, the character, has been on the podcast too, Sean.
• 11:26
  Lisa Nichols: And, it was so interesting because, you know, some of the things that you're
• 11:29
  Lisa Nichols: talking about, like with the basketball coaching and, you know, that sort of thing,
• 11:34
  Lisa Nichols: just so much of that applies,
• 11:37
  Lisa Nichols: even in the business world.
• 11:38
  Lisa Nichols: And so I could not agree with you more.
• 11:40
  Lisa Nichols: It's not about, you know, it's not about the title.
• 11:43
  Lisa Nichols: It's really about how you show up, right, as an individual, and
• 11:47
  Lisa Nichols: that's so good.
• 11:49
  Lisa Nichols: Well, you know, I know that, you know, let's just talk
• 11:53
  Lisa Nichols: a little bit about this.
• 11:53
  Lisa Nichols: So Gallup reported that seventy percent of a team's
• 11:58
  Lisa Nichols: engagement is influenced by their managers.
• 12:02
  Lisa Nichols: I'm gonna read that again.
• 12:04
  Sean Glaze: Mhmm.
• 12:04
  Lisa Nichols: Gallup reported that seventy percent of a team's engagement
• 12:09
  Lisa Nichols: is influenced by their managers.
• 12:12
  Lisa Nichols: Wow.
• 12:14
  Lisa Nichols: And your book,
• 12:16
  Lisa Nichols: your latest book, I wanna talk about that now, What Effective Leaders Do.
• 12:21
  Lisa Nichols: I loved this, Sean.
• 12:23
  Lisa Nichols: I'm gonna read this.
• 12:24
  Lisa Nichols: This is the first sentence in your
• 12:28
  Lisa Nichols: preface, and
• 12:30
  Lisa Nichols: I wrote in big letters, gold.
• 12:33
  Lisa Nichols: Gold.
• 12:34
  Lisa Nichols: Here's what you said.
• 12:35
  Lisa Nichols: As a basketball coach, I eventually learned that the most
• 12:40
  Lisa Nichols: effective tool to accelerate player development
• 12:45
  Lisa Nichols: was investing in my development as their
• 12:49
  Lisa Nichols: coach.
• 12:51
  Sean Glaze: I think that, again, basketball and all the lessons that I was,
• 12:55
  Sean Glaze: you know, you know, very grateful to, to learn sometimes through
• 12:59
  Sean Glaze: failure and sometimes through great mentors absolutely translates over
• 13:03
  Sean Glaze: into any industry of business because leadership is leadership and culture is culture.
• 13:07
  Sean Glaze: And the things that contribute to those things being done well and successfully, I
• 13:11
  Sean Glaze: think, are absolutely the same.
• 13:14
  Sean Glaze: And, you know, that that very first year that I was a head coach,
• 13:17
  Sean Glaze: I took over a girls program at Pope High School here just west of
• 13:21
  Sean Glaze: Atlanta.
• 13:22
  Sean Glaze: And, we had more talent than our record would have, would
• 13:26
  Sean Glaze: have suggested my very first year.
• 13:27
  Sean Glaze: We won five games my first year as the head coach, Lisa.
• 13:31
  Sean Glaze: We lost twenty one.
• 13:32
  Sean Glaze: That's not a very good record.
• 13:34
  Sean Glaze: And we had more talent than that.
• 13:36
  Sean Glaze: And so at the end of the year, you know, when when you have
• 13:40
  Sean Glaze: failure, again, it's,
• 13:42
  Sean Glaze: I'll I'll share a lot.
• 13:43
  Sean Glaze: You know, praise validates, but pain educates if you allow.
• 13:48
  Sean Glaze: I'm looking in the mirror after they're kind of leaving the locker room and
• 13:52
  Sean Glaze: the the locker room that we've kinda just ended our season and after the
• 13:56
  Sean Glaze: playoffs that year.
• 13:57
  Sean Glaze: And I realized, you know, if things are gonna be better, I needed to
• 14:00
  Sean Glaze: be better.
• 14:01
  Sean Glaze: There was something I wasn't doing, and that was kind of the beginning of
• 14:04
  Sean Glaze: my journey into discovering the impact of culture and camaraderie
• 14:08
  Sean Glaze: and expectations and relationships and trust and accountability and appreciation and
• 14:13
  Sean Glaze: all the things that now I help leaders and teams to hopefully
• 14:17
  Sean Glaze: incorporate so they can become more effective and they can build winning
• 14:21
  Sean Glaze: teammates in their organization.
• 14:23
  Sean Glaze: But everything came back to, yeah, the, your job as a leader is
• 14:27
  Sean Glaze: to point at yourself.
• 14:28
  Sean Glaze: And and a powerful question I love to share when I'm coaching leaders
• 14:32
  Sean Glaze: is what part of my leadership led to that outcome?
• 14:36
  Sean Glaze: Because we've all have outcomes that we're either proud of or that
• 14:40
  Sean Glaze: we're regretful for.
• 14:42
  Sean Glaze: And if you've gone through a season or a project and things didn't go
• 14:45
  Sean Glaze: as well as you know they could have, what part of my leadership and
• 14:49
  Sean Glaze: maybe it's that I didn't communicate enough or I didn't invest in the development
• 14:52
  Sean Glaze: of that person enough or I wasn't clear.
• 14:54
  Sean Glaze: But what's the thing that I can claim control over so that next time,
• 14:59
  Sean Glaze: I'm better and the team's better because I took ownership?
• 15:02
  Lisa Nichols: Mhmm.
• 15:03
  Lisa Nichols: That is so good.
• 15:04
  Lisa Nichols: Alright.
• 15:04
  Lisa Nichols: Now I may be putting you on the spot here.
• 15:08
  Lisa Nichols: And you can say pass if you don't wanna answer this.
• 15:11
  Lisa Nichols: But as you're talking, I'm just I'm gonna ask you to be vulnerable.
• 15:14
  Lisa Nichols: I mean, you just said that that first year, you you won five games
• 15:18
  Lisa Nichols: and you lost, I think, you said twenty one, twenty one games.
• 15:22
  Sean Glaze: Remind me, Lisa.
• 15:26
  Lisa Nichols: You know, and so so you said, really, you were focused on the talent
• 15:29
  Lisa Nichols: but did not focus on the culture as much.
• 15:30
  Lisa Nichols: Is there another,
• 15:34
  Lisa Nichols: story, Sean, in your leadership journey
• 15:38
  Lisa Nichols: where you had an outcome and you could map it back to something
• 15:42
  Lisa Nichols: that was lacking in you?
• 15:44
  Lisa Nichols: Can you think of a story like that?
• 15:46
  Lisa Nichols: I'm I'm asking you
• 15:47
  Sean Glaze: to be a young adult.
• 15:49
  Sean Glaze: I think that my, my my story vault is full of,
• 15:53
  Sean Glaze: look where I stepped in it here.
• 15:55
  Sean Glaze: Here's what you want to avoid as a leader because.
• 15:58
  Sean Glaze: Mhmm.
• 15:59
  Sean Glaze: And I think that's what happens to us as as leaders is if we
• 16:02
  Sean Glaze: are vulnerable enough and and, you know, willing to acknowledge our own mistakes,
• 16:06
  Sean Glaze: we make it that much, you know, more possible for other people to
• 16:10
  Sean Glaze: not suffer from the potholes that you kinda we we ended
• 16:14
  Sean Glaze: up enduring.
• 16:15
  Sean Glaze: And, yeah, absolutely.
• 16:16
  Sean Glaze: I think that in terms of dealing with players, I really do
• 16:20
  Sean Glaze: regret the the first handful of years the way that I coach
• 16:25
  Sean Glaze: because I was absolutely and, again, we talk about in my book staying coachable.
• 16:29
  Sean Glaze: Talk about in the years there's four questions you need to ask to help
• 16:32
  Sean Glaze: people to stay coachable because we all have people on our teams that we
• 16:35
  Sean Glaze: wish would listen better and apply better.
• 16:37
  Sean Glaze: And that starts with looking in the mirror and ourselves being coachable.
• 16:40
  Sean Glaze: Because I was always as a leader, I was that command
• 16:44
  Sean Glaze: and coerce and consequence.
• 16:46
  Sean Glaze: And I was gonna strong-arm and twist arms, and you gotta do it this
• 16:49
  Sean Glaze: way, and this is how and I think that, you know, ultimately, that is
• 16:53
  Sean Glaze: unbelievably, you know, just unpleasant to play for.
• 16:58
  Sean Glaze: And I think that, I was always aware as a coach of where we
• 17:01
  Sean Glaze: wanted to be or I thought we could get, but I was painfully
• 17:05
  Sean Glaze: aware of where we were and what that gap was.
• 17:07
  Sean Glaze: And so every day, I'd show up to practice, and we're closing the gap.
• 17:10
  Sean Glaze: We're getting better, and this is what we need to do differently.
• 17:13
  Sean Glaze: And I was horrible in praising and acknowledging progress because progress
• 17:17
  Sean Glaze: motivates, not necessarily criticism.
• 17:20
  Sean Glaze: And so that was a huge thing for me is is realizing that a
• 17:23
  Sean Glaze: lot of the relationships with the players that I had were fractured and sabotaged
• 17:28
  Sean Glaze: because I was driving so hard at something that I wanted for them that
• 17:31
  Sean Glaze: they didn't understand that I didn't have the awareness of
• 17:36
  Sean Glaze: how my criticism and what I characterized as coaching was
• 17:40
  Sean Glaze: harming our team performance.
• 17:41
  Sean Glaze: And I think that, you know, again, a a lot of that comes back
• 17:44
  Sean Glaze: to, you know, me realizing what was that mistake that contributed to
• 17:49
  Sean Glaze: the performance I was witnessing.
• 17:51
  Lisa Nichols: That is so powerful.
• 17:53
  Lisa Nichols: That is so powerful, Sean.
• 17:55
  Lisa Nichols: And I have seen this played out in the business world and in teams
• 17:59
  Lisa Nichols: where a leader is just wanting so badly.
• 18:03
  Lisa Nichols: Right?
• 18:03
  Lisa Nichols: They think they know how we're gonna improve things.
• 18:06
  Lisa Nichols: Right?
• 18:06
  Lisa Nichols: And they want it so badly, but the criticism I love what you
• 18:10
  Lisa Nichols: just said.
• 18:11
  Lisa Nichols: Criticism does not motivate.
• 18:13
  Lisa Nichols: Praise and progress.
• 18:15
  Lisa Nichols: Right.
• 18:15
  Lisa Nichols: That's you know, you want more of that, you know, and somebody's gonna respond
• 18:19
  Lisa Nichols: so much better.
• 18:21
  Lisa Nichols: Because how do they respond to criticism, Sean?
• 18:24
  Sean Glaze: Oh, they How do they I can tell you how my my athletes did
• 18:27
  Sean Glaze: and how in coaching leaders, how their people do.
• 18:29
  Sean Glaze: And, again, they pull away and they become less open and they don't admit
• 18:33
  Sean Glaze: mistakes and they don't look for advice and they don't share ideas because
• 18:37
  Sean Glaze: they shrug off and say it's just gonna end up leading to some type
• 18:40
  Sean Glaze: of complaint or criticism or somebody pointing out what I'm lacking instead of what
• 18:44
  Sean Glaze: I'm doing.
• 18:45
  Sean Glaze: And, and that's not a good place for for a leader to be.
• 18:48
  Lisa Nichols: That's so good.
• 18:49
  Lisa Nichols: That's gold right there too.
• 18:51
  Lisa Nichols: Well, we do need to take a quick break, and we'll be right back
• 18:53
  Lisa Nichols: with Sean Glaze on the Something Extra podcast.
• 18:56
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• 18:57
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• 19:26
  Lisa Nichols: Welcome back, everyone, to the Something Extra podcast with Sean Glaze.
• 19:32
  Lisa Nichols: Sean, I do have a statistic here from Zippia Research that says
• 19:36
  Lisa Nichols: seventy seven percent of businesses report that leadership is
• 19:40
  Lisa Nichols: lacking.
• 19:42
  Lisa Nichols: And, I mean, you just told us about the way a leader approaches,
• 19:47
  Lisa Nichols: you know, progress is, oh, you know, the criticism versus the praising
• 19:51
  Lisa Nichols: the progress that's happened.
• 19:52
  Lisa Nichols: So I'm so excited to really dig in more
• 19:56
  Lisa Nichols: to your newest book.
• 19:57
  Lisa Nichols: Like I said, it just came out in June, What Effective Leaders Do.
• 20:02
  Lisa Nichols: I would really encourage our listeners go out and get the book.
• 20:06
  Lisa Nichols: I promise you it's gonna help you.
• 20:08
  Lisa Nichols: But I do wanna ask you a few questions.
• 20:10
  Lisa Nichols: So you talk about the ladder of awareness
• 20:13
  Sean Glaze: Yeah.
• 20:13
  Lisa Nichols: And how it helps leaders stop solving the wrong problems.
• 20:18
  Lisa Nichols: That's really good.
• 20:19
  Lisa Nichols: I mean, you don't wanna solve the wrong problem.
• 20:21
  Lisa Nichols: Getting clear probably on the the the actual problem and getting clarity
• 20:26
  Lisa Nichols: is probably, you know, one of the first steps.
• 20:28
  Lisa Nichols: But talk to us more about the ladder of awareness, Sean.
• 20:32
  Sean Glaze: I think that, and I shared this in in my keynotes with audiences, Lisa,
• 20:36
  Sean Glaze: is, leaders and team members don't get better because of experience.
• 20:41
  Sean Glaze: Experience alone, and we've all had that person that we've worked with who has
• 20:44
  Sean Glaze: years of experience, but they're the exact same person and still sabotaging things
• 20:49
  Sean Glaze: because of who they've chosen to remain.
• 20:52
  Sean Glaze: I think that people get better in whatever position, not because of experience, but
• 20:56
  Sean Glaze: because of awareness.
• 20:57
  Sean Glaze: And awareness, the way I define it with audiences, is awareness is what we
• 21:01
  Sean Glaze: notice in our experiences.
• 21:03
  Sean Glaze: And if I'm talking to a group of six hundred people in a conference,
• 21:06
  Sean Glaze: there's gonna be six hundred versions of my keynote walking out the doors to
• 21:10
  Sean Glaze: a break because they're gonna notice different things in the stories and activities that
• 21:13
  Sean Glaze: I would facilitate or share, and that's gonna be what's relevant and meaningful
• 21:18
  Sean Glaze: to them.
• 21:19
  Sean Glaze: And I think the problem for us sometimes as leaders is we do make
• 21:22
  Sean Glaze: assumptions, and and sometimes that that lack of awareness is the thing that
• 21:26
  Sean Glaze: causes us to not be as effective as we are.
• 21:29
  Sean Glaze: And I think that there's four steps to becoming as aware as we need
• 21:32
  Sean Glaze: to be with every issue that we're dealing with.
• 21:35
  Sean Glaze: And and and, again, other thing that I'll share is, you know, the most
• 21:38
  Sean Glaze: dangerous and costly issue on your team is the one
• 21:42
  Sean Glaze: that you haven't addressed.
• 21:44
  Sean Glaze: And the reason that many leaders don't address certain issues is
• 21:48
  Sean Glaze: because they're not aware of it.
• 21:50
  Sean Glaze: And I actually opened the book with the story of the main character walking
• 21:53
  Sean Glaze: downstairs and finding that the first floor of our house has been
• 21:58
  Sean Glaze: flooded.
• 21:59
  Sean Glaze: And that drip, that leak has been going on all night or for a
• 22:02
  Sean Glaze: while, and she wasn't aware of the issue.
• 22:06
  Sean Glaze: So that first thing is we're unaware, and there's damage being done, but we
• 22:09
  Sean Glaze: don't even see the damage.
• 22:10
  Sean Glaze: Right?
• 22:11
  Sean Glaze: We don't see how that's impacting our team or our people.
• 22:14
  Sean Glaze: And so the unaware is the first level of awareness.
• 22:17
  Sean Glaze: We don't realize what that issue or problem or or or, you know, kind
• 22:21
  Sean Glaze: of circumstance might be.
• 22:22
  Sean Glaze: And the next step up from that is symptom aware.
• 22:25
  Sean Glaze: And this is where a lot of leaders will actually get stuck because they
• 22:28
  Sean Glaze: see the symptom, and they'll complain about or point at somebody else who was
• 22:32
  Sean Glaze: responsible or at fault for the symptom, and they don't look beyond
• 22:36
  Sean Glaze: the symptom.
• 22:37
  Sean Glaze: Here's an example from when I was a coach.
• 22:39
  Sean Glaze: I had a player who would show up late, and I got really upset
• 22:42
  Sean Glaze: at the player because I was telling myself the story that this athlete
• 22:47
  Sean Glaze: was irresponsible or lazy or didn't care because he was showing up late.
• 22:51
  Sean Glaze: And that's the symptom.
• 22:53
  Sean Glaze: So you address the symptom and you consequence the kid, and he drops his
• 22:57
  Sean Glaze: chin and he does the running.
• 22:59
  Sean Glaze: And I wasn't ever curious or compassionate enough to look beyond the symptom.
• 23:04
  Sean Glaze: The problem
• 23:06
  Sean Glaze: that led to the symptom had nothing to do with him and his choices,
• 23:09
  Sean Glaze: but with his circumstance at home that I hadn't actually taken the time to
• 23:13
  Sean Glaze: inquire about.
• 23:14
  Sean Glaze: And when we get curious and compassionate, when we really look beyond the symptom,
• 23:18
  Sean Glaze: that's when you get to that third level, which is what is the problem?
• 23:21
  Sean Glaze: Once you're problem aware instead of symptom aware, most of the
• 23:25
  Sean Glaze: time, that solution becomes a whole lot easier to identify and
• 23:29
  Sean Glaze: to implement.
• 23:30
  Sean Glaze: And I think that those four levels going from unaware to symptom aware
• 23:35
  Sean Glaze: to problem aware to then solution aware, those are the steps that
• 23:39
  Sean Glaze: every leader takes multiple times a week depending upon what it is that's on
• 23:43
  Sean Glaze: their plate.
• 23:44
  Lisa Nichols: That is so good.
• 23:45
  Lisa Nichols: That is so good.
• 23:46
  Lisa Nichols: I love that.
• 23:47
  Lisa Nichols: Well, yeah, and you've kind of talked about this a little bit, the
• 23:52
  Lisa Nichols: assumptions, you know, because you assumed.
• 23:54
  Lisa Nichols: Right?
• 23:55
  Lisa Nichols: You assumed that this player really wasn't that committed, you know, maybe
• 23:59
  Lisa Nichols: a little lazy, that sort of thing.
• 24:01
  Lisa Nichols: But what have you seen?
• 24:02
  Lisa Nichols: Because you've worked with a lot of leaders in a lot of organizations.
• 24:05
  Lisa Nichols: What are some of those common assumptions that leaders make sometimes that are
• 24:09
  Lisa Nichols: really damaging?
• 24:10
  Sean Glaze: You've been wonderful in sharing the book, and I thank you very much for,
• 24:14
  Sean Glaze: referring that to your audience, and and I do hope that they'll find value
• 24:17
  Sean Glaze: in it.
• 24:17
  Sean Glaze: But the book is basically a parable that within the story, you have this
• 24:21
  Sean Glaze: kind of wise mentor that shares four lessons, and each of the lessons
• 24:25
  Sean Glaze: kinda has four steps.
• 24:26
  Sean Glaze: The first is about the ladder of awareness, how that impacts culture.
• 24:30
  Sean Glaze: And then the second is about the assumptions that we make, about the stories
• 24:33
  Sean Glaze: we tell ourselves.
• 24:35
  Sean Glaze: And the the mentor talks to the main character and basically shares, you know,
• 24:38
  Sean Glaze: that there are four types of stories that you tell
• 24:42
  Sean Glaze: yourself as a leader, as a team member, that you need to take time
• 24:46
  Sean Glaze: to question because the stories we tell ourselves determine the behaviors
• 24:51
  Sean Glaze: that we take.
• 24:51
  Sean Glaze: Our beliefs drive our behaviors.
• 24:53
  Sean Glaze: Mhmm.
• 24:54
  Sean Glaze: And I think the first question you need to ask yourself is about purpose.
• 24:59
  Sean Glaze: Because especially for emerging leaders, people moving from a role
• 25:03
  Sean Glaze: as an individual contributor to somebody who is in the role as a manager
• 25:07
  Sean Glaze: now, that idea of purpose is something that's very difficult to shift in
• 25:11
  Sean Glaze: to understand my job is not to produce results.
• 25:14
  Sean Glaze: My job is to produce results through people.
• 25:17
  Sean Glaze: And that, you know, being a leader is a very different set of skills
• 25:21
  Sean Glaze: than being a technical contributor in some other way.
• 25:24
  Sean Glaze: That's why not every athlete is a great coach.
• 25:27
  Sean Glaze: That's why not every good salesperson is a great manager because they may be
• 25:31
  Sean Glaze: great at this thing, but acquiring a different set of skills
• 25:35
  Sean Glaze: is required when you actually become a leader versus that.
• 25:39
  Sean Glaze: And I think that identifying you, what is success in this role?
• 25:43
  Sean Glaze: That's a pretty powerful question to ask.
• 25:45
  Sean Glaze: And I think Mhmm.
• 25:46
  Sean Glaze: Going into interview with somebody, and I'm looking to, you know, change
• 25:50
  Sean Glaze: my role or take on a new responsibility.
• 25:52
  Sean Glaze: You know, what is the difference between good and great in this role?
• 25:55
  Sean Glaze: What what would what would success look like for me or for us in
• 25:59
  Sean Glaze: terms of what I can create?
• 26:00
  Sean Glaze: And I think that that idea of purpose, what's the story you're telling yourself
• 26:04
  Sean Glaze: about what it is that your goal truly is?
• 26:06
  Sean Glaze: I think that's the first thing that oftentimes leaders kinda get lost with.
• 26:10
  Lisa Nichols: Mhmm.
• 26:10
  Lisa Nichols: That's so good.
• 26:12
  Lisa Nichols: Sean, we have a leadership division within Technology Partners.
• 26:15
  Lisa Nichols: We're a full service IT firm, but what we realized
• 26:20
  Lisa Nichols: is that sometimes what happens in technology,
• 26:24
  Lisa Nichols: and I know it happens in other sectors as well, you will take your
• 26:28
  Lisa Nichols: best technical architect, solution architect.
• 26:30
  Lisa Nichols: You said, okay.
• 26:31
  Lisa Nichols: Now you're gonna lead a team, and the person's never had any training.
• 26:35
  Lisa Nichols: And what we have found in our research is that the average age for
• 26:39
  Lisa Nichols: a technical professional to be, more in a supervisory role is
• 26:43
  Lisa Nichols: about twenty seven.
• 26:44
  Sean Glaze: Oh, wow.
• 26:44
  Lisa Nichols: But they don't get any kind of training, leadership training, till they're forty one.
• 26:50
  Lisa Nichols: That's a big gap.
• 26:51
  Lisa Nichols: So, you know, we we recognize that.
• 26:53
  Lisa Nichols: We bought a leadership, company last year, that
• 26:57
  Lisa Nichols: we've incorporated now into our service offerings.
• 26:59
  Lisa Nichols: But, yeah, it's a it's a it's a big,
• 27:03
  Lisa Nichols: big gap there, you know
• 27:06
  Sean Glaze: Zipia, statistic.
• 27:07
  Sean Glaze: Right?
• 27:08
  Sean Glaze: The seventy seven percent of leadership is lacking because, again Yes.
• 27:11
  Sean Glaze: They're promoted based upon technical excellence or or skills, and
• 27:15
  Sean Glaze: they don't have the interpersonal set of skills that helps them to succeed in
• 27:19
  Sean Glaze: a different role.
• 27:20
  Lisa Nichols: Yeah.
• 27:20
  Lisa Nichols: Absolutely.
• 27:21
  Lisa Nichols: Absolutely.
• 27:22
  Lisa Nichols: So that's the gap we're trying to fill for technology professionals.
• 27:26
  Lisa Nichols: Well, the book talks about Alire's focus evolving.
• 27:30
  Lisa Nichols: Why is moving from stuff to systems
• 27:34
  Lisa Nichols: so important?
• 27:35
  Lisa Nichols: And I do believe systems are very important because that's what
• 27:38
  Sean Glaze: you're how
• 27:39
  Lisa Nichols: do you scale?
• 27:40
  Sean Glaze: Well, let me share with the the the listeners because you were great in
• 27:43
  Sean Glaze: mentioning the idea of assumption.
• 27:45
  Sean Glaze: I think that purpose is one of those assumptions.
• 27:47
  Sean Glaze: But I go over the kind of three others and that idea of principles
• 27:50
  Sean Glaze: and what the values look like in your organization and not assuming that people
• 27:53
  Sean Glaze: know what that looks like and what the parameters are.
• 27:57
  Sean Glaze: Assuming stories about your people.
• 27:59
  Sean Glaze: What are the stories you're telling about that person that when you read the
• 28:01
  Sean Glaze: subject line of an email, you're excited or you're you're kind of, very
• 28:06
  Sean Glaze: much not looking forward to that interaction?
• 28:08
  Sean Glaze: Because we do before an interaction, we tell ourselves a story about somebody.
• 28:11
  Sean Glaze: A lot of times, we create a story and look for evidence to support
• 28:14
  Sean Glaze: that instead of being curious and compassionate.
• 28:17
  Sean Glaze: And the last one deals with politeness and and leaders and team members
• 28:21
  Sean Glaze: understanding that nice is unkind.
• 28:24
  Sean Glaze: Nice for most people means I'm gonna bite my tongue and not share something
• 28:28
  Sean Glaze: that would be helpful.
• 28:29
  Sean Glaze: And so those are the assumptions that are the kind of the second lesson
• 28:33
  Sean Glaze: that then lead into in another new thing that, you know, the main
• 28:37
  Sean Glaze: character learns is that kind of third set of lessons, which is based upon,
• 28:41
  Sean Glaze: you know, what are those priorities that you need to have as a leader.
• 28:44
  Sean Glaze: And I think that that clarity of priorities is what leads
• 28:49
  Sean Glaze: managers to be more effective.
• 28:52
  Sean Glaze: Understanding importance of awareness, understanding and being aware of
• 28:56
  Sean Glaze: the questions or the assumptions or the stories they're telling themselves,
• 29:00
  Sean Glaze: and then being intentional about how am I going to invest my time and
• 29:04
  Sean Glaze: my resources to help improve my team's performance.
• 29:08
  Sean Glaze: And I think that a lot of leaders get stuck if you're thinking about
• 29:11
  Sean Glaze: that third lesson you mentioned.
• 29:13
  Sean Glaze: When you think about the importance of priorities, a lot of newer leaders especially,
• 29:17
  Sean Glaze: and even sometimes established leaders focus on that lower level, which is,
• 29:23
  Sean Glaze: man, I'm just gonna focus on stuff.
• 29:25
  Sean Glaze: Stuff is easy.
• 29:27
  Sean Glaze: Stuff doesn't talk back.
• 29:28
  Sean Glaze: Stuff doesn't ask questions.
• 29:30
  Sean Glaze: Stuff doesn't criticize me.
• 29:32
  Sean Glaze: I can get new posters.
• 29:34
  Sean Glaze: I can make sure I'm taking care of the printers.
• 29:36
  Sean Glaze: I can order us some, you know, new gear.
• 29:39
  Sean Glaze: Whatever that stuff is, you can dress up a locker room or a conference
• 29:42
  Sean Glaze: room, and you can provide stuff.
• 29:43
  Sean Glaze: And I'm not saying this stuff is bad.
• 29:46
  Sean Glaze: Right.
• 29:46
  Sean Glaze: That's where your only focus is.
• 29:48
  Sean Glaze: You're neglecting things that impact wins for your organization.
• 29:53
  Sean Glaze: There was no practice jersey or wall poster in our locker room
• 29:57
  Sean Glaze: that affected how many wins we had as a team.
• 29:59
  Sean Glaze: It was nice to have some of those resources and this stuff, but
• 30:03
  Sean Glaze: that didn't affect our wins.
• 30:05
  Sean Glaze: And for us to move from stuff to the next thing, we need to
• 30:08
  Sean Glaze: be willing to then see that our investment of time
• 30:13
  Sean Glaze: needs to have a result.
• 30:14
  Sean Glaze: Right?
• 30:15
  Sean Glaze: And and so the result of stuff doesn't really affect your wins
• 30:19
  Sean Glaze: and losses,
• 30:21
  Sean Glaze: and focusing on staff is that next step.
• 30:24
  Sean Glaze: And if I focus on my staff and my people and the development of
• 30:27
  Sean Glaze: the people around me, now we're gonna be better if they're better.
• 30:30
  Sean Glaze: Right?
• 30:30
  Sean Glaze: And so now we're focusing upon players.
• 30:33
  Sean Glaze: My players are gonna be better.
• 30:34
  Sean Glaze: We're gonna do skill development.
• 30:35
  Sean Glaze: That is absolutely essential, but it's never sufficient
• 30:39
  Sean Glaze: because to move from
• 30:42
  Sean Glaze: stuff to staff is an important step.
• 30:44
  Sean Glaze: But if you just stop on staff, you're neglecting the single
• 30:48
  Sean Glaze: most powerful entity that is in charge of your development and your team's
• 30:53
  Sean Glaze: growth, which is the person in the mirror when you're brushing your teeth, and
• 30:56
  Sean Glaze: that is yourself.
• 30:57
  Sean Glaze: And so I tell leaders, you know, you're gonna go from stuff to staff,
• 31:00
  Sean Glaze: and then the next step is going from staff to self.
• 31:04
  Sean Glaze: What do you see in yourself?
• 31:05
  Sean Glaze: How can you improve yourself and your awareness and your leadership and your understanding
• 31:09
  Sean Glaze: and your, knowledge and your wisdom?
• 31:13
  Sean Glaze: And I think that self development, you know, growing our awareness
• 31:17
  Sean Glaze: of ourselves,
• 31:19
  Sean Glaze: affects everything else.
• 31:20
  Sean Glaze: As you climb that ladder, every step you take improves
• 31:24
  Sean Glaze: everything that kinda comes underneath that.
• 31:26
  Sean Glaze: When I start focusing on staff, the printers don't get broken because they
• 31:30
  Sean Glaze: know how to use them.
• 31:31
  Sean Glaze: When I start focusing on myself, my staff gets better because I'm able to
• 31:34
  Sean Glaze: coach them better and have better interactions if I focused on myself first.
• 31:39
  Lisa Nichols: Mhmm.
• 31:40
  Lisa Nichols: Oh my goodness.
• 31:40
  Lisa Nichols: There's so much richness packed in there.
• 31:42
  Lisa Nichols: So much richness.
• 31:44
  Lisa Nichols: Do you know you might know, Mark Miller.
• 31:46
  Lisa Nichols: Do you know Mark Miller?
• 31:48
  Sean Glaze: Absolutely.
• 31:48
  Sean Glaze: Mark does a fantastic job come out of Chick fil A.
• 31:50
  Sean Glaze: Yeah.
• 31:51
  Lisa Nichols: Oh my goodness.
• 31:52
  Lisa Nichols: Love him.
• 31:53
  Lisa Nichols: And, you know, he calls the stuff that you're talking about the quicksand.
• 31:56
  Lisa Nichols: Right.
• 31:57
  Lisa Nichols: And so many leaders get caught in the quicksand.
• 31:59
  Lisa Nichols: It's almost impossible to get out of that.
• 32:02
  Lisa Nichols: Right?
• 32:03
  Lisa Nichols: But if you are only if you're stuck in the quicksand, you're not really
• 32:07
  Lisa Nichols: focusing on the most important things and the things, like you said, that are
• 32:10
  Lisa Nichols: gonna really help you win.
• 32:12
  Lisa Nichols: Mhmm.
• 32:12
  Lisa Nichols: And that's, I tell you, we always say, your staff's
• 32:16
  Lisa Nichols: gonna be a lot more excited, and they're gonna be a lot more engaged
• 32:19
  Lisa Nichols: when your organization is winning, Sean.
• 32:23
  Sean Glaze: Absolutely.
• 32:24
  Lisa Nichols: You know, it's a lot more motivating to be on a winning team.
• 32:28
  Lisa Nichols: So, yeah, that's the that's so good.
• 32:31
  Lisa Nichols: Well, you talk a lot about confidence.
• 32:33
  Lisa Nichols: Confidence is a huge theme in the book.
• 32:35
  Lisa Nichols: How can leaders build confidence?
• 32:38
  Lisa Nichols: And let's talk about the confidence, and we're not talking about hubris.
• 32:41
  Lisa Nichols: We're not talking about, you know, being arrogant.
• 32:45
  Lisa Nichols: I mean, there's a there's a difference.
• 32:47
  Lisa Nichols: Right?
• 32:47
  Lisa Nichols: But, you know, how can they increase their confidence without
• 32:51
  Lisa Nichols: being You have arrogant or walk
• 32:54
  Sean Glaze: me through the book.
• 32:54
  Sean Glaze: Thank you so much for being such a wonderful kinda Sherpa here through the
• 32:58
  Sean Glaze: the subject matter.
• 33:00
  Sean Glaze: And and I would share just for your listeners because I know you mentioned
• 33:02
  Sean Glaze: it and I neglected to to add this to my previous response.
• 33:06
  Sean Glaze: I think that that last thing that needs to be a priority after you
• 33:09
  Sean Glaze: go from staff to staff to self is how do you build systems?
• 33:13
  Sean Glaze: Because my job as a parent, my job as a coach, my job as
• 33:17
  Sean Glaze: a teacher, my job as a leader in any industry is to make myself
• 33:22
  Sean Glaze: unnecessary in most regards.
• 33:25
  Sean Glaze: And I wanna grow the people around me to the point where
• 33:29
  Sean Glaze: they appreciate and look to and value me that they are competent
• 33:33
  Sean Glaze: on their own.
• 33:34
  Sean Glaze: And I think that that idea of building systems where if you were absent
• 33:38
  Sean Glaze: for three weeks, does everything fall apart, or can people follow the systems that
• 33:41
  Sean Glaze: you've documented so the team continues to thrive even
• 33:46
  Sean Glaze: though one of those components, maybe you, maybe someone else, was removed
• 33:50
  Sean Glaze: for a while.
• 33:50
  Sean Glaze: And and that leads to, obviously, confidence.
• 33:53
  Sean Glaze: And I I, you know, I had a lot
• 33:57
  Sean Glaze: of of experience in trying to build confidence with athletes
• 34:02
  Sean Glaze: because athletes would be very easily frustrated when they couldn't do
• 34:06
  Sean Glaze: something well.
• 34:06
  Sean Glaze: And I was one of those.
• 34:07
  Sean Glaze: If you tell you took me to a golf course, I'm very easily frustrated
• 34:12
  Sean Glaze: because it's not something I'm good at.
• 34:13
  Sean Glaze: And and I think that confidence is something that when you're thinking
• 34:17
  Sean Glaze: about not just athletes, but then members of your team, when they attempt something
• 34:22
  Sean Glaze: and they're not good at it, it's very easy to get deflated.
• 34:26
  Sean Glaze: Mhmm.
• 34:26
  Sean Glaze: And and I think that confidence in what I would share with our players
• 34:30
  Sean Glaze: is you've got to be willing to be bad long enough to get better.
• 34:34
  Sean Glaze: If I'm talking with leaders about leading one on one conversations more effectively,
• 34:39
  Sean Glaze: or even leaders who have never started one on ones to build relationships and
• 34:42
  Sean Glaze: rapport and do coaching with their people, it's gonna be awkward the first couple
• 34:47
  Sean Glaze: of times that you do it.
• 34:48
  Sean Glaze: But you gotta be willing to be bad long enough to get better, and
• 34:51
  Sean Glaze: we do well what we do often.
• 34:53
  Sean Glaze: And so our job is to again, Steph Curry, the greatest shooter in
• 34:57
  Sean Glaze: the history of the NBA,
• 34:59
  Sean Glaze: misses fifty four percent of his shots.
• 35:02
  Sean Glaze: Even at the unbelievable excellent professional level, there's still
• 35:06
  Sean Glaze: a lot of failure and imperfection involved, but think about somebody who
• 35:10
  Sean Glaze: is that proficient and competent, he had to
• 35:14
  Sean Glaze: be bad long enough to get better.
• 35:16
  Sean Glaze: And everybody that we would go through form shooting or ball handling or whatever
• 35:19
  Sean Glaze: it was we were teaching as a skill, they had to be willing to
• 35:23
  Sean Glaze: be bad long enough to get better and to realize nobody makes all their
• 35:27
  Sean Glaze: shots when they start, but you can't get good unless you're willing to be
• 35:31
  Sean Glaze: bad.
• 35:31
  Sean Glaze: And I think that that first level of competence or of confidence
• 35:35
  Sean Glaze: is the courage
• 35:38
  Sean Glaze: to then start something that you're not good at, to have a difficult conversation
• 35:42
  Sean Glaze: that you know is needed, but you're not really necessarily comfortable with.
• 35:46
  Sean Glaze: And I think courage is the first thing that allows us to be imperfect.
• 35:51
  Sean Glaze: That courage leads to getting clarity about what do I need to do differently
• 35:55
  Sean Glaze: or better.
• 35:56
  Sean Glaze: You have the courage to step into a a necessary and uncomfortable
• 36:01
  Sean Glaze: circumstance or skill.
• 36:04
  Sean Glaze: That first experience gives me more clarity on this is the thing that I
• 36:08
  Sean Glaze: need to work on to be better at for the next iteration, for the
• 36:11
  Sean Glaze: next meeting, for the next project.
• 36:14
  Sean Glaze: And that leads to cultivation.
• 36:15
  Sean Glaze: And cultivation is when you actually have intentional practice, when you role play
• 36:19
  Sean Glaze: something as a salesperson to get over objections, where you do a better job
• 36:23
  Sean Glaze: because you're practicing the skill that you know is necessary.
• 36:28
  Sean Glaze: And then the final thing is competence.
• 36:31
  Sean Glaze: And competence is very simply being able to do something
• 36:35
  Sean Glaze: well even in adversity.
• 36:37
  Sean Glaze: And if you are competent, you know, that's gonna be the thing that gives
• 36:41
  Sean Glaze: you confidence.
• 36:42
  Sean Glaze: I tell people you never want to fake it until you make it Yeah.
• 36:46
  Sean Glaze: Because that's false confidence.
• 36:48
  Sean Glaze: And I think people notice that discomfort of when you're
• 36:52
  Sean Glaze: trying to pretend that you're something that internally maybe you don't feel like.
• 36:56
  Sean Glaze: I think you need to give yourself permission to be imperfect and to have
• 37:00
  Sean Glaze: the courage to step into and be vulnerable.
• 37:02
  Sean Glaze: Hey, guys.
• 37:03
  Sean Glaze: Listen.
• 37:03
  Sean Glaze: We've not tried this before, but I think it's important for us to because
• 37:07
  Sean Glaze: blank.
• 37:08
  Sean Glaze: And I'm willing for us to be imperfect so that we can blank, and
• 37:11
  Sean Glaze: we're gonna get better if we'll invest in.
• 37:14
  Sean Glaze: But I think that that idea of of competence being the foundation
• 37:18
  Sean Glaze: of any real confidence is where most leaders,
• 37:22
  Sean Glaze: can benefit from realizing imperfection is okay early.
• 37:26
  Lisa Nichols: So, Sean, that I that is so good.
• 37:28
  Lisa Nichols: I could not agree more.
• 37:30
  Lisa Nichols: Competence will lead to confidence.
• 37:33
  Lisa Nichols: Right?
• 37:33
  Lisa Nichols: But competence takes practice.
• 37:35
  Sean Glaze: Absolutely.
• 37:36
  Lisa Nichols: And I I say that all the time.
• 37:38
  Lisa Nichols: I'm like, there are very few things, I believe,
• 37:43
  Lisa Nichols: that you can't get better at.
• 37:45
  Sean Glaze: Right.
• 37:45
  Lisa Nichols: Your IQ is kinda set.
• 37:47
  Lisa Nichols: Right?
• 37:48
  Lisa Nichols: That's kinda set.
• 37:49
  Lisa Nichols: But I always say, like, EQ, you know, these, you know,
• 37:53
  Lisa Nichols: leadership skills, we can get better at them, but it takes practice.
• 37:58
  Lisa Nichols: It takes practice.
• 38:00
  Lisa Nichols: So I've got just one more question for you, and
• 38:04
  Lisa Nichols: then let's talk about something extra.
• 38:06
  Lisa Nichols: Okay?
• 38:06
  Lisa Nichols: Alright.
• 38:09
  Lisa Nichols: Today's world looks a lot different than it did pre pandemic.
• 38:13
  Lisa Nichols: I was just talking to a friend yesterday, you know, and her team is
• 38:17
  Lisa Nichols: spread out.
• 38:17
  Lisa Nichols: I mean, really, she's hiring people all over the country now, and
• 38:22
  Lisa Nichols: we have these hybrid and remote teams.
• 38:24
  Lisa Nichols: But what have you seen?
• 38:26
  Lisa Nichols: What are those things that you believe
• 38:29
  Lisa Nichols: leaders can do to make that situation even more effective?
• 38:34
  Sean Glaze: Yeah.
• 38:34
  Sean Glaze: And and this is, as you might imagine, a a pretty common conversation you
• 38:38
  Sean Glaze: have in in in coaching Yes.
• 38:40
  Sean Glaze: Who has a hybrid team or has a remote team where there's somebody, you
• 38:44
  Sean Glaze: know, even in a different country, not even just in a different state.
• 38:47
  Sean Glaze: Mhmm.
• 38:47
  Sean Glaze: That idea of leadership, and this is I I firmly believe leadership
• 38:52
  Sean Glaze: doesn't change and and trust isn't built because of proximity.
• 38:56
  Sean Glaze: It's built because of intentional investment in relationships
• 39:00
  Sean Glaze: and being curious and being compassionate and being vulnerable and being transparent
• 39:05
  Sean Glaze: and acknowledging issues, etcetera, etcetera.
• 39:07
  Sean Glaze: And so that idea of leading effectively in a hybrid or
• 39:11
  Sean Glaze: remote environment, the steps and and the the curriculum
• 39:16
  Sean Glaze: of sorts is exactly the same.
• 39:18
  Sean Glaze: The issue is, and this is why people will bring me in sometimes for
• 39:21
  Sean Glaze: team building, I believe, is because they'll have an annual retreat, and this is
• 39:25
  Sean Glaze: the first time that thirty five percent of their staff has ever met each
• 39:28
  Sean Glaze: other because they've just been hired or they were at a different part and
• 39:32
  Sean Glaze: they weren't part of the office.
• 39:34
  Sean Glaze: And so coming in to give them a chance to build connections that are
• 39:37
  Sean Glaze: going to improve and establish a trusted relationship so people
• 39:42
  Sean Glaze: do collaborate better and share mistakes and offer advice
• 39:46
  Sean Glaze: and, you know, look for ideas.
• 39:48
  Sean Glaze: I think those are the things that leaders need to intentionally
• 39:53
  Sean Glaze: engineer those interactions.
• 39:56
  Sean Glaze: And, obviously, you know, that idea of, you know, if I've got, you know,
• 39:59
  Sean Glaze: seven or eight people that are my direct reports, I need to be touching
• 40:02
  Sean Glaze: base with them every week.
• 40:03
  Sean Glaze: Not because there's something on fire, but because I wanna make sure that I'm
• 40:07
  Sean Glaze: checking in and I know what they're working on, what's happening to them outside
• 40:10
  Sean Glaze: of, how can I be of service, what I need to coach them through,
• 40:13
  Sean Glaze: what is it something that I can look ahead for them and maybe clear
• 40:16
  Sean Glaze: some obstacles that might be in their way?
• 40:18
  Sean Glaze: I think that that familiarity and that level of care and concern
• 40:22
  Sean Glaze: is something that builds a team.
• 40:24
  Sean Glaze: And I talk a lot with leaders, especially with remote and hybrid teams.
• 40:29
  Sean Glaze: Because it's true in basketball, but it's absolutely true in business.
• 40:32
  Sean Glaze: There are people looking to poach your locker room.
• 40:35
  Sean Glaze: What are those loyalty anchors that you need to have in place to keep
• 40:39
  Sean Glaze: the people in your locker room from going somewhere else?
• 40:42
  Sean Glaze: And I think that that idea of if you've got talented people, you wanna
• 40:45
  Sean Glaze: make sure that they feel understood and cared for and supported and encouraged
• 40:50
  Sean Glaze: and challenged and all the other things that you're only gonna learn if you're
• 40:53
  Sean Glaze: really investing in those things intentionally.
• 40:55
  Sean Glaze: And so, absolutely, the idea of leadership
• 40:59
  Sean Glaze: is the same, but I think that making our meetings more effective,
• 41:04
  Sean Glaze: making sure that we are clarifying those values of how we're gonna interact together,
• 41:08
  Sean Glaze: making sure that people understand what, you know, asynchronous communication is gonna be available
• 41:12
  Sean Glaze: so they can think about and contribute in different ways.
• 41:15
  Sean Glaze: I think that those are all things that the leaders can do more intentionally.
• 41:19
  Sean Glaze: And and I think designing those experiences and understanding what
• 41:23
  Sean Glaze: a team needs and how do we make that happen in this environment.
• 41:27
  Lisa Nichols: Mhmm.
• 41:28
  Lisa Nichols: No.
• 41:28
  Lisa Nichols: That's good.
• 41:30
  Lisa Nichols: Designing intentionally.
• 41:33
  Lisa Nichols: Designing intentionally.
• 41:35
  Lisa Nichols: That's good.
• 41:36
  Lisa Nichols: Well, can I ask you a question?
• 41:38
  Lisa Nichols: And I wasn't you know, I I would love to know this.
• 41:41
  Lisa Nichols: We're gonna talk about something extra.
• 41:42
  Lisa Nichols: This is called something extra.
• 41:44
  Lisa Nichols: And the the question I usually ask is, what do you believe is the
• 41:46
  Lisa Nichols: something extra every leader needs?
• 41:48
  Lisa Nichols: But I'm gonna ask you a question.
• 41:50
  Lisa Nichols: Do you know what your something extras are?
• 41:52
  Lisa Nichols: What are the things, Sean, that make you an effective leader
• 41:56
  Lisa Nichols: and coach?
• 41:57
  Sean Glaze: It's the same for me as it would be for any leader, Lisa, And
• 42:00
  Sean Glaze: I think you would acknowledge it's exactly the same for you.
• 42:03
  Sean Glaze: And and when I'm having a conversation with a prospective client, we're talking
• 42:07
  Sean Glaze: about when an event's going to, be able to create in terms of outcome
• 42:11
  Sean Glaze: or maybe a coaching relationship.
• 42:13
  Sean Glaze: Ultimately, our growth and improvement depends upon
• 42:17
  Sean Glaze: increasing our awareness.
• 42:18
  Sean Glaze: I needed to be more aware of what could contribute to a culture in
• 42:21
  Sean Glaze: order to implement those cultures.
• 42:24
  Sean Glaze: And I think that for leaders, there's only three ways that you can improve
• 42:27
  Sean Glaze: your awareness.
• 42:27
  Sean Glaze: And the something extra that we all need are at least
• 42:32
  Sean Glaze: one, and hopefully all three of those three areas or three kinda avenues
• 42:36
  Sean Glaze: to improve our awareness.
• 42:37
  Sean Glaze: The first is reflection.
• 42:38
  Sean Glaze: And I've got on my website a list of questions for reflection that people
• 42:42
  Sean Glaze: can get out of my toolbox.
• 42:44
  Sean Glaze: But are you taking time to intentionally ask meaningful questions
• 42:48
  Sean Glaze: in the morning or in the evening to make sure that you're better the
• 42:51
  Sean Glaze: next day following interactions from the previous day?
• 42:55
  Sean Glaze: And and, you know, again, reflection is pretty powerful.
• 42:58
  Sean Glaze: The issue is we don't always see ourselves clearly.
• 43:03
  Lisa Nichols: We don't
• 43:03
  Sean Glaze: need the benefit of other people's perspectives.
• 43:06
  Sean Glaze: And so the second thing that leaders need beyond reflection is feedback.
• 43:10
  Sean Glaze: Who is somebody on your team that you would trust to give you objective
• 43:14
  Sean Glaze: and valuable helpful feedback?
• 43:17
  Sean Glaze: And can you ask them just one specific focused question and then
• 43:21
  Sean Glaze: be unbelievably grateful for their response and let them know
• 43:25
  Sean Glaze: how you've changed because of that in a few days?
• 43:27
  Sean Glaze: And you can do that over Zoom.
• 43:29
  Sean Glaze: You can do that over, you know, coffee.
• 43:31
  Sean Glaze: But, hey, I'm trying to make myself better.
• 43:34
  Sean Glaze: I understand that one of the areas I might be able to get better
• 43:36
  Sean Glaze: in is blank.
• 43:37
  Sean Glaze: What's something that you've noticed that would help me be better in this role?
• 43:41
  Sean Glaze: And that gives you a chance to get things from other people
• 43:45
  Sean Glaze: that you wouldn't have had the the thought to reflect on yourself.
• 43:49
  Sean Glaze: Mhmm.
• 43:49
  Sean Glaze: The third thing is coaching.
• 43:51
  Sean Glaze: And the reason that coaching is so important is that any high achiever, whether
• 43:55
  Sean Glaze: it's athletics or business, every high achiever is gonna have a coach to help
• 43:59
  Sean Glaze: them to be better, to help them to see opportunities for improvement where they
• 44:02
  Sean Glaze: can perform better that they wouldn't have thought of otherwise.
• 44:04
  Sean Glaze: And a coach's job is to ask questions that you and your team
• 44:09
  Sean Glaze: members wouldn't have thought of if I hadn't introduced them.
• 44:12
  Sean Glaze: And I think that that idea of reflection and feedback and coaching, those are
• 44:16
  Sean Glaze: the three ways that we can improve our awareness, and that awareness is absolutely
• 44:20
  Sean Glaze: always gonna be the something extra that we need to do for our team.
• 44:25
  Lisa Nichols: That's beautiful.
• 44:26
  Lisa Nichols: I love it.
• 44:27
  Lisa Nichols: I love it.
• 44:27
  Lisa Nichols: I just had, breakfast with a a leader yesterday that leads a very
• 44:32
  Lisa Nichols: large organization.
• 44:34
  Lisa Nichols: And this person said that they they have a coach, that they
• 44:38
  Lisa Nichols: they are coaching with somebody every month.
• 44:39
  Lisa Nichols: I mean, they're coaching other people.
• 44:41
  Lisa Nichols: Mhmm.
• 44:41
  Lisa Nichols: Obviously, they've got a very large organization, but somebody's pouring into them
• 44:45
  Lisa Nichols: because we all have blind spots, Sean.
• 44:49
  Lisa Nichols: Newsflash.
• 44:51
  Lisa Nichols: If you think you don't
• 44:52
  Sean Glaze: the younger version of ourselves that convinced themselves, I don't know it all.
• 44:56
  Sean Glaze: Right?
• 44:56
  Sean Glaze: That's the difference in confidence and arrogance.
• 44:58
  Sean Glaze: Right?
• 44:58
  Lisa Nichols: Yes.
• 44:59
  Lisa Nichols: Yes.
• 44:59
  Lisa Nichols: Thinking I
• 45:00
  Sean Glaze: can help versus thinking I don't need help.
• 45:02
  Lisa Nichols: Yeah.
• 45:03
  Lisa Nichols: Oh my goodness.
• 45:04
  Lisa Nichols: So good.
• 45:05
  Lisa Nichols: So good.
• 45:05
  Lisa Nichols: I'm gonna go back to that that first line.
• 45:09
  Lisa Nichols: As a basketball coach, I eventually learned that the most effective tool to
• 45:13
  Lisa Nichols: accelerate player development was investing in my development
• 45:17
  Lisa Nichols: as their coach.
• 45:18
  Lisa Nichols: So it starts with us.
• 45:20
  Lisa Nichols: It starts with us.
• 45:21
  Lisa Nichols: And, you have to have the awareness to know that you need that.
• 45:25
  Lisa Nichols: But thank you so much.
• 45:27
  Lisa Nichols: This has been so much fun.
• 45:28
  Lisa Nichols: I know that this is gonna really be helpful to our listener, Sean.
• 45:32
  Lisa Nichols: Listeners, please go go out and get the book.
• 45:35
  Lisa Nichols: I promise you, go go check out Sean's website.
• 45:39
  Lisa Nichols: He's got tools out there.
• 45:40
  Lisa Nichols: Please please please follow him.
• 45:42
  Lisa Nichols: He's got great content that I know is gonna help you on your leadership
• 45:46
  Lisa Nichols: journey.
• 45:46
  Lisa Nichols: And one thing I failed to mention, and I feel so badly about
• 45:50
  Lisa Nichols: this, Sean, I have to give a mutual a shout out to our mutual
• 45:55
  Lisa Nichols: good friend, Bob Tidi.
• 45:58
  Lisa Nichols: Love Bob Tidi, leading with questions.
• 46:01
  Lisa Nichols: If he had not connected us, Sean, you and I may not have crossed
• 46:04
  Lisa Nichols: paths.
• 46:05
  Lisa Nichols: And so I'm so grateful for him.
• 46:07
  Lisa Nichols: Yes.
• 46:08
  Lisa Nichols: For sure.
• 46:08
  Lisa Nichols: So shout out to Bob.
• 46:10
  Lisa Nichols: Thank you, Bob.
• 46:11
  Lisa Nichols: You're amazing.
• 46:11
  Lisa Nichols: Bob.
• 46:13
  Lisa Nichols: Alright.
• 46:14
  Lisa Nichols: Sean, thanks so much again for being on the show today.
• 46:17
  Sean Glaze: Absolutely my pleasure.
• 46:18
  Sean Glaze: Thanks so much for being a wonderful host, Lisa.
• 46:20
  Sean Glaze: Appreciate you and look forward to staying in touch in the future.
• 46:23
  Announcer: Thank you for listening to today's show.
• 46:25
  Announcer: Something extra with Lisa Nichols is a Technology Partners production.
• 46:29
  Announcer: Copyright Technology Partners Inc two thousand and nineteen.
• 46:32
  Announcer: For show notes or to reach Lisa, visit tpi dot co co
• 46:36
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• 46:38
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• 46:42
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