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What ‘True Confidence’ Really Means (Beyond Internet Hype) · A Capture Deep Vibs A Positive Space For Inspiration And Embracing Of Heart

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  Speaker 1: So there seems to be an obsession with being confident
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  Speaker 1: that has found its way to every corner of the internet.
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  Speaker 1: Thousands of TikTok accounts and YouTube channels are desperately trying
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  Speaker 1: to teach you how to be confident. But why the obsession?
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  Speaker 1: How confident can we really be and what is true
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  Speaker 1: confidence anyway? Let's find out. How is confidence presented to us?
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  Speaker 1: If you were to describe someone confident, you might think
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  Speaker 1: of someone with good looks, good hair, a good sense
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  Speaker 1: of style, money, and an extroverted personality. But this idea
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  Speaker 1: is influenced by the never-ending stream of consumerism that is
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  Speaker 1: constantly presented to us everywhere, especially in social media. Rich
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  Speaker 1: and successful people buy expensive things and we end up
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  Speaker 1: wanting and expecting this from ourselves and feel ashamed when
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  Speaker 1: we don't. What everyone is obsessed with is not confidence,
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  Speaker 1: but a performance of it in the image of an
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  Speaker 1: extravagant lifestyle. After all, true confidence doesn't come from what
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  Speaker 1: you wear or have. It comes from feeling secure in
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  Speaker 1: who you are and being able to trust yourself and
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  Speaker 1: your abilities. Why is there a lack of confidence? What
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  Speaker 1: changed that confidence seems to be in short supply? The
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  Speaker 1: origins of our confidence lies in our childhoods. This is
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  Speaker 1: where we achieve, or fail to achieve, self-confidence and self-esteem.
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  Speaker 1: As shown in a study published in the Elementary School Journal,
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  Speaker 1: young children build confidence and self-esteem through successful experiences. Knowing
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  Speaker 1: that we can succeed makes us feel more capable, but
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  Speaker 1: measuring that success creates another obstacle. It is a delicate balance.
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  Speaker 1: If we are praised too much, we might become mean
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  Speaker 1: and overconfident, with egos that are extremely delicate and bound
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  Speaker 1: to be shattered. Too little praise and we may feel
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  Speaker 1: like there is no such thing as being good enough.
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  Speaker 1: Our parents are our first teachers and we rely on
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  Speaker 1: them to tell us if we are doing things correctly.
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  Speaker 1: Our parents affect our confidence and self-esteem into adolescence, where
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  Speaker 1: we start to get an understanding of who we are
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  Speaker 1: or who we want to be. Social media undeniably plays
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  Speaker 1: a role in how we view ourselves, but it also
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  Speaker 1: depends on how we engage with social media. If you're
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  Speaker 1: only ever on social media for memes rather than lifestyle content,
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  Speaker 1: for example, you probably won't feel as much pressure to
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  Speaker 1: adhere to the standards of the content you engage with.
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  Speaker 1: Why is confidence hard to obtain? It can feel like
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  Speaker 1: we're always competing with those around us. When you're feeling
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  Speaker 1: proud of a drawing you did, but find out someone
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  Speaker 1: your age or younger can draw better than you, your
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  Speaker 1: confidence may take a hit. The same applies to anything
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  Speaker 1: that we define ourselves by. If you're a good writer,
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  Speaker 1: you like to go to the gym, or you have
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  Speaker 1: a good sense of style, The confidence that you get
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  Speaker 1: from these things also puts you at risk of becoming
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  Speaker 1: insecure about those very things. This is why confidence is
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  Speaker 1: particularly difficult to obtain for the generations growing up on
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  Speaker 1: the internet. There's always someone better than us right there
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  Speaker 1: on the front page. Studies have found that the old saying,
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  Speaker 1: comparison is the thief of joy. Or in this case,
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  Speaker 1: confidence is quite true. We are obsessed with confidence because
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  Speaker 1: everyone else seems to have it or deserve it except us.
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  Speaker 1: What will confidence change for you? There's a huge difference
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  Speaker 1: between the portrayal of confidence and actual confidence. People often
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  Speaker 1: mistake confident attitudes with uncaring, apathetic, and insincere attitudes. By
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  Speaker 1: acting confident in ways that people expect, you rob yourself
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  Speaker 1: of true confidence. True confidence is something specific to yourself.
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  Speaker 1: Maybe confidence is feeling assured in your line of work,
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  Speaker 1: enjoying your hobbies without worrying about people judging you or
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  Speaker 1: having a strong sense of self-worth. These kinds of confidence
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  Speaker 1: have been found to increase your motivation. It can also
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  Speaker 1: help against imposter syndrome and feel unworthy of friends or
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  Speaker 1: romantic relationships. Considering this, the obsession with confidence is a
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  Speaker 1: cultural phenomenon that is being spurred on by social media.
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  Speaker 1: If you want to be confident, your goals should be
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  Speaker 1: personal rather than general. Are the things you aspire to
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  Speaker 1: and the ways that you better yourself unique and personal
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  Speaker 1: to you? Or do you do these things simply to
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  Speaker 1: come across as confident rather than to be confident? There
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  Speaker 1: are no rules for confidence. Confidence is a state of being.
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  Speaker 1: not something that can be obtained through fulfilling an established
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  Speaker 1: list of requirements. It can be affected by external actions
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  Speaker 1: and how others interact with you, but it is ultimately
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  Speaker 1: an internal process. Our obsession with confidence comes from how
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  Speaker 1: valuable it seems to be while seeming impossible to get.
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  Speaker 1: We all want to feel like we are good at
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  Speaker 1: what we do. We are happy with how we look
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  Speaker 1: and we don't care about what others think. We think
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  Speaker 1: of confidence as a reward for doing things correctly, but
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  Speaker 1: every person has their own relationship with confidence. Don't let
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  Speaker 1: others tell you it will make you feel confident. Find
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  Speaker 1: out for yourself. If it means wearing your hair a
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  Speaker 1: certain way or improving in your hobbies, embrace that. What
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  Speaker 1: is your relationship with confidence like? Let us know in
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  Speaker 1: the comments below. If this video taught you something new
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  Speaker 1: about confidence, let us know by leaving a like. Remember
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  Speaker 1: to subscribe to Psych2Go for more videos like this.