Latest / Wedding Pros who are ready to grow - with Becca Pountney / Overcoming self sabotage in your wedding business with Camilla J Collins

Transcript

Overcoming self sabotage in your wedding business with Camilla J Collins · Wedding Pros who are ready to grow - with Becca Pountney

• 0:00
  Camilla: There's no way around gaining that experience.
• 0:02
  And the more you do, the more you learn and the more confidence you
• 0:06
  build and the better at things you get.
• 0:08
  And the better you know, what you like and what you don't like.
• 0:10
  And I think that's extremely important because you're running your own business.
• 0:15
  You're in charge of your own time and what you do.
• 0:18
  So you might as well make it something that you enjoy and something that's
• 0:22
  in line with you and focus on that.
• 0:25
  And that way you're going to have.
• 0:26
  You're just naturally going to glow.
• 0:27
  People are going to be drawn to you, and you're going to have success with it.
• 0:33
  Becca: I'm Becca Pountney, wedding business marketing expert,
• 0:36
  speaker, and blogger, and you're listening to the Wedding Pros
• 0:38
  Who Are Ready To Grow podcast.
• 0:41
  I'm here to share with you actionable tips, strategies, and real life
• 0:44
  examples to help you take your wedding business to the next level.
• 0:48
  If you are an ambitious wedding business owner that wants to take your passion
• 0:52
  and use it to build a profitable, sustainable business, doing what you
• 0:55
  love, then you're in the right place.
• 0:57
  Let's get going with today's episode.
• 1:00
  Today I'm chatting with Camilla Collins.
• 1:02
  Camilla is the founder of CJC Hair and Makeup, an agency that
• 1:06
  offers luxury hair and makeup for weddings and corporate events.
• 1:09
  Through her work in the beauty world, Camilla became passionate about helping
• 1:12
  people feel confident from the inside out.
• 1:15
  And over the last few years, she's written a book, spoken on
• 1:17
  stages, and helped numerous clients find their inner confidence.
• 1:21
  I know that showing up as your authentic self can be a struggle for a lot of you.
• 1:25
  So I'm really excited to dive into this conversation today.
• 1:28
  Camilla, welcome to the podcast.
• 1:30
  Camilla: Oh, thank you so much for having me.
• 1:32
  It's awesome to be here, Becca.
• 1:33
  Thank you.
• 1:34
  Becca: I am really excited to have you because I know that this is an
• 1:38
  area that lots of my listeners really do struggle with, and we'll get into
• 1:41
  it in more detail in a little while.
• 1:43
  But.
• 1:44
  First I want to ask you a little bit about your background because I've
• 1:47
  been doing a little bit of research and I think me and you actually
• 1:50
  started in a very similar way.
• 1:52
  So my background is I studied television at university and worked in television and
• 1:57
  I believe you did a similar kind of thing.
• 1:58
  Camilla: I, I did.
• 1:59
  I did indeed.
• 2:00
  Yeah.
• 2:00
  So my background is hair and makeup artistry and I was initially trained
• 2:05
  in TV, film and theatre because that's what I thought I wanted to do.
• 2:09
  I didn't know you were in, in TV.
• 2:11
  That's really cool by the way.
• 2:12
  We're going to come back to that.
• 2:13
  But yeah, so I went off to train at a place called Grease Paint and
• 2:17
  I did the TV film and theatre kind of course and there was a little
• 2:20
  bridal session in there as well.
• 2:23
  I won't say session, it was a...
• 2:24
  Yeah, it was quite a few days we did on Bridal, and I just, I really
• 2:28
  enjoyed it, I loved it, but I was younger then, and I think the tutors
• 2:31
  were like, you know, if you do Bridal, then you don't have any weekends free,
• 2:34
  you know, that's that, and so I was like, oh, I don't know about that.
• 2:37
  And I love the special effects side of things.
• 2:39
  Little did I know that if you're in film and TV, like, you have, never mind
• 2:42
  weekends, you just have no time free.
• 2:44
  Working all the time.
• 2:46
  But yeah, I started off in the filming industry and then I ended up
• 2:50
  assisting on a couple of weddings, just, you know, gaining experience,
• 2:53
  building up portfolio and all of that.
• 2:55
  And do you know what Becca, I just absolutely loved it.
• 2:58
  It didn't feel like work to me.
• 3:00
  It just felt like getting ready with the girls on Saturday morning.
• 3:03
  And to be honest, it paid better than the filming stuff.
• 3:07
  A lot of that was, you know, at that time anyway, I sort of did a, a year
• 3:11
  kind of, you know, collaborating.
• 3:14
  Working on things kind of for expenses only.
• 3:17
  And, you know, it's tough.
• 3:18
  You may or may not get your foot in the door and, you know, I like to stick
• 3:22
  things out and I'm happy to work hard, but I just, I felt called to weddings
• 3:25
  and it's what I really, you know, loved being part of someone's special day and,
• 3:29
  you know, working with them to find that.
• 3:32
  Dream look, there was a lot more kind of emotion in it and
• 3:35
  I'm all in for the emotion.
• 3:37
  Whereas, you know, when you've got fashion or filming or you work
• 3:39
  on an e commerce stuff, you know, the models are just to do a job.
• 3:42
  The actors, they're just to do a job.
• 3:43
  They don't really care.
• 3:44
  They just kind of sit in the chair.
• 3:45
  So you don't kind of get that relationship really.
• 3:48
  And that's, that's kind of what got me into, into weddings.
• 3:51
  And so, yeah, I built up my.
• 3:54
  Bridal started building up my bridal business myself.
• 3:57
  Then I turned that into an agency because I could only be in one place at a time.
• 4:02
  I still can only be in one place at a time.
• 4:04
  However, you know, the, the team now can go out for me and
• 4:08
  yeah, I just got frustrated.
• 4:09
  I think, you know, not so much.
• 4:11
  Now, and I'm sure we'll, we'll talk about this at some point, but weddings
• 4:15
  used to be very seasonal, you know, it was summer and kind of that was it.
• 4:18
  And you're done.
• 4:19
  And it was weekends, not so much week.
• 4:21
  And now it's obviously kind of, you know, throughout the year, people are
• 4:24
  getting discounts or, you know, on different days or different times of
• 4:27
  the year, so that was really kind of the push to, to create the agency, because
• 4:31
  I get, you know, four inquiries for one day and I could only be in one place.
• 4:35
  And, yeah, so I built the agency up still did the special effects work, so
• 4:40
  Halloween was very busy in hospitality for us, and it still is, we, we do
• 4:43
  that as well, we look after sort of corporations for parties and events, so
• 4:47
  I still have the special effects work there, but I'm more for the general public
• 4:51
  rather than the TV and film industry.
• 4:53
  Becca: Fascinating.
• 4:54
  I love hearing people's stories, I think it's really important for us to...
• 4:57
  build on that foundation and understand where someone's come
• 5:00
  from to really understand why they're doing what they do now.
• 5:03
  And I also think there's a lesson in there straight away for people to learn
• 5:07
  that the grass isn't always greener because people do look at the television
• 5:10
  industry, the film industry, and they're like, Oh, that's where I wish I could be.
• 5:14
  It's so glamorous.
• 5:15
  I want to work in that area.
• 5:16
  But as we both know, having worked in it, I mean, I worked on Deal
• 5:19
  or No Deal, Strictly Come Dancing.
• 5:21
  I worked really hard and it was exciting.
• 5:24
  But it was exhausting.
• 5:25
  It was a hugely long hours.
• 5:27
  Like there was no maternity pay when I wanted to have children.
• 5:30
  Like it was just insanity.
• 5:33
  And now when people say to me, Oh, I'm just I'm just in weddings.
• 5:35
  I wish I was in TV and film.
• 5:37
  I'm like, you should be really happy.
• 5:38
  You're in weddings.
• 5:39
  Cause it's a much more exciting industry.
• 5:41
  You can choose your own timescales.
• 5:42
  You're not working yourself into the ground.
• 5:44
  And also you're just a commodity in TV and film.
• 5:47
  I'm sure you'll remember this from like, there's just someone there and saying,
• 5:50
  right, you've got 15 minutes to do this makeup and then they need to be on set.
• 5:53
  So it's not about.
• 5:54
  like enjoying the experience.
• 5:55
  It's literally just get in, get out and do the next thing.
• 5:58
  Camilla: It's so true.
• 5:59
  And it feels like everybody else has kind of, I don't want to say like you don't
• 6:02
  feel completely like valued, but it's like everybody gets the time they need.
• 6:05
  And it's like, how long for makeup?
• 6:07
  And I'll be like, Oh, 15 minutes.
• 6:08
  No, you've got five.
• 6:09
  And it's like, okay, and yeah, it's just, it's really difficult.
• 6:13
  It is really kind of fast paced and you just sort of have to get it done.
• 6:16
  And it's great when you're doing interesting stuff.
• 6:19
  And obviously all jobs are kind of different.
• 6:20
  If I was doing special effects things all the time on film, then it would be great.
• 6:24
  But quite often I'm just sitting there powdering people and I'm watching
• 6:27
  my makeup crumble under the heat of the lights and the dehydration of
• 6:30
  the actors and actresses that are doing take after take after take.
• 6:34
  And there's a lot of hanging around as well.
• 6:36
  Yeah, it's, I like to.
• 6:40
  and do, I can't stand sitting around doing nothing, but that's just me.
• 6:44
  Becca: As with everyone's journey and everyone I speak to on this podcast, there
• 6:47
  will have been things that you learned from that experience, which have kind
• 6:50
  of helped you with where you are today.
• 6:52
  So you moved from TV and film, you decided to go for the wedding.
• 6:55
  So you said that you kind of had a couple of people that you are assisting for.
• 6:59
  How did you go from just assisting for a couple of people to thinking,
• 7:02
  yeah, actually I'm going to do this as a business and start getting clients.
• 7:05
  Camilla: Sure.
• 7:06
  So, You know, back then I was literally on, I kind of had to, it's actually really
• 7:12
  important that I created a routine for myself because I had no kind of structure,
• 7:15
  no one to call me into a certain place, you know, you've got to be your own boss.
• 7:19
  And I remember just refreshing job boards, after job boards, after job boards,
• 7:23
  kind of each morning and emailing out and just sending lots of emails through
• 7:27
  either, you know, for collaborations and Yeah, there was a woman in St.
• 7:32
  Albans who had a makeup business, and I can't remember what the website was that
• 7:37
  I found her on, but I reached out to her, and actually it was her really that I
• 7:42
  started doing kind of a lot of weddings with, just assisting her, and that's
• 7:44
  kind of where it, where it began, and you know, a lot of work kind of came through.
• 7:49
  That way, but prior to that, you know, it was more kind of collaborative shoots,
• 7:52
  just building up portfolio, which is important, you know, we need the even
• 7:55
  more so now we need those kinds of images and, you know, thankfully we don't
• 8:00
  have to print off, you know, physical portfolios so much anymore and it can
• 8:05
  kind of all go or go online with digital images, but yeah, it was very much
• 8:09
  just reaching out to as many people as possible and just finding my thing, you
• 8:12
  know, in terms of for me, obviously it wasn't Justin in the weddings, but also.
• 8:17
  With like fashion editorial, filming, short films, music, videos, commercials,
• 8:21
  you know, finding my way with that, it was all kind of experience.
• 8:25
  But I mean, if you are just going for the weddings.
• 8:26
  industry and events.
• 8:28
  You know, there's so many different types of events you can work on.
• 8:31
  There's corporate events, there's private events, there's obviously weddings, you
• 8:33
  know, there's children's birthday parties.
• 8:35
  There's, you know, there's so many different things that you can,
• 8:38
  you know, try out for yourself and find out what lights you up and
• 8:41
  where you, where you kind of fit.
• 8:43
  So, so yeah, after assisting for a while, I just thought, you
• 8:46
  know what, I can, I can do this.
• 8:48
  I can do this myself.
• 8:48
  I can do this on my own.
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  And, and you have to do.
• 8:52
  You have to put the work in sort of under other people to build your confidence.
• 8:56
  And again, that is a process.
• 8:57
  You can't shortcut that.
• 8:59
  Although I was having a conversation, we did a style shoot this week and I was
• 9:02
  just chatting to everybody, the team.
• 9:04
  And we're just saying how much the, I would say Gen Z have like serious balls
• 9:09
  to just go in for stuff now, and they're actually not willing to do kind of the.
• 9:14
  You know, don't want to do the work sort of behind, they just want to go straight
• 9:17
  in, but actually I think they're doing themselves a disservice because you
• 9:20
  find out so much about yourself when you're, you know, on the job doing the
• 9:25
  stuff that you don't want to do and just learning from the ground up rather
• 9:28
  than going straight in at the top.
• 9:30
  And it builds your own confidence so you have a much easier time of it rather than
• 9:34
  being anxious the whole time in this like, you know, anxiety sort of pit while you're
• 9:39
  just trying to, trying to get stuff done.
• 9:40
  So.
• 9:41
  Yeah, building slowly is, is my advice and just getting the, doing, getting
• 9:46
  the work and getting the experience in.
• 9:47
  There's no accounting for experience, you know, you can't learn that at,
• 9:51
  you know, whatever school you went to, whether it's floristry school or
• 9:54
  event school or makeup artistry, you know, you have to get out on the ground
• 9:58
  working with different people, different personalities, different curveballs being
• 10:02
  thrown at you from, you know, jobs, the world, life, and all of that as well.
• 10:06
  And just, It's working out how to navigate it all in your own way.
• 10:10
  Becca: It's so true.
• 10:11
  And I think that for me is one of the things that I did really learn from
• 10:14
  working in television and film, actually, because the culture in that industry
• 10:18
  is everyone starts at the bottom.
• 10:20
  Everyone gets their hands dirty.
• 10:21
  Everyone takes out the rubbish and goes and makes people coffee.
• 10:25
  But over time you build that experience and the next thing you know,
• 10:29
  you're high up, you're a production manager, you're a director, you're a
• 10:31
  producer, and that's how that works.
• 10:33
  And I think you're right.
• 10:34
  We need to keep that mindset in our own businesses that,
• 10:37
  yeah, we need to do the work.
• 10:38
  Just because you want to be a wedding planner doesn't mean you
• 10:40
  shouldn't go and work at a venue.
• 10:42
  or assist another wedding planner or go and work for a catering
• 10:46
  company and understand how that side of it works because all of that
• 10:49
  experience is going to be great.
• 10:51
  Now, lots of the people listening are going to be in that part of the business.
• 10:55
  I know you've gone on to do your agency and all the stuff you're doing
• 10:58
  now, but lots of people listening are still going to be there.
• 11:00
  They're one man bands.
• 11:01
  They're out there trying to get their weddings.
• 11:04
  Would you just share a couple of the real highs and a couple of the real
• 11:07
  lows and learnings from your time being in that place that they are now?
• 11:12
  Camilla: Oh, goodness.
• 11:14
  Do you know what?
• 11:14
  I think the majority of the highs are at the beginning because it's all new.
• 11:20
  It's all exciting.
• 11:22
  I think the struggle comes when you kind of have to make that, you know,
• 11:27
  level up and that's where it's kind of difficult and things sort of get a
• 11:31
  bit and you get stuck in your ways of doing things and The world is evolving
• 11:37
  faster than it ever has before.
• 11:39
  And I think the number one skill that anyone can master in their
• 11:43
  business is being agile with it.
• 11:46
  And also not getting too attached to it, not over identifying with it
• 11:52
  as well, which is something I think.
• 11:55
  I certainly did myself.
• 11:56
  And I think we all do when, you know, they say your business isn't your baby.
• 12:00
  It's like, yeah, but it is, you know, you pour so much heart and soul and
• 12:04
  particularly in the wedding and events industry, because you're working
• 12:07
  with people on, you know, some of the most important days of their life.
• 12:10
  There's so much emotion attached in that.
• 12:13
  And it's very easy to kind of, you know, obviously get overly invested in that and
• 12:17
  sort of get kind of stuck in there that you're not actually running your business.
• 12:21
  Properly, you're not sort of thinking about, you know, sales and marketing
• 12:25
  and profit and all the things that you need to, or you're just too invested in,
• 12:28
  in your couples, or your brides or your grooms or whoever you're working with,
• 12:31
  but yeah, I mean, the highs, there were so many highs at the beginning, you know,
• 12:35
  networking was fresh, even I just, I think I over networked myself at one point,
• 12:39
  you know, I love building the website.
• 12:41
  That was like, oh, I just can't be bothered to like do that anymore.
• 12:43
  I love writing blogs.
• 12:45
  I can't write another blog, you know?
• 12:46
  So it's, it's about sort of getting, keeping it.
• 12:49
  Fresh for yourself and switching things up.
• 12:52
  So, I mean, for me, there were just so many highs, like
• 12:55
  everything was, was a high.
• 12:57
  And I think the lowest points for me, I mean, I've not had, you know, everyone
• 13:05
  says, Oh, have you had like bridezilla's?
• 13:06
  You know, it's the number one question.
• 13:07
  I'm sure everyone can relate to that.
• 13:09
  Who's listening now?
• 13:10
  Because everyone always asks that who's not in the wedding events industry.
• 13:14
  And, you know, thankfully, I think, you know, you attract You attract
• 13:19
  what you put out in terms of, you know, what you're kind of marketing,
• 13:22
  you attract the right people.
• 13:23
  So as long as actually you're being true to you and you're not copying
• 13:26
  someone else, you're not trying to be something that you're not, you should
• 13:28
  actually get the right couples or in our case, the right brides coming to you.
• 13:32
  So we've not actually had a massive problem with that.
• 13:35
  I think when I was working for other agencies, you know, starting out that,
• 13:38
  you know, there was a tricky couple of trials, but I was learning, you
• 13:41
  know, that that didn't go so well.
• 13:43
  It wasn't the end of the world.
• 13:44
  It felt like the end of the world back then, but.
• 13:47
  I think in this business in particular, it's more so actually.
• 13:52
  Another, another greatest skill is people, you know, probably more so
• 13:56
  than, you know, for us, the makeup and the hair, more so than even,
• 14:00
  you know, the flowers and the cake.
• 14:02
  And, you know, obviously all that has to be brilliant and fab, but handling
• 14:07
  people I think is the most important.
• 14:09
  important thing that you can, skill you can master.
• 14:13
  And that's why, you know, going back to what we're saying about working
• 14:16
  from the ground up, the more people you can come into contact with, the more
• 14:18
  personalities you have to deal with, the more emotions you have to manage for
• 14:23
  other people, like the better you will be in the wedding and events industry.
• 14:27
  Becca: Absolutely, absolutely.
• 14:29
  Now you strike me as someone that's a little bit like me, very entrepreneurial,
• 14:32
  where you do something and then you get bored really quickly, and then you want
• 14:35
  to do something different, and you're always looking for new adventures.
• 14:38
  And you wrote a book.
• 14:40
  Tell me, how on earth did you come about deciding to write a book?
• 14:44
  Tell us a bit about the book, because writing a book is something that I
• 14:47
  keep telling myself I should do, and then I talk myself out of it, because
• 14:50
  it feels like a lot of hard work.
• 14:51
  So tell me about your book.
• 14:52
  Why did you write the book?
• 14:53
  What's it about?
• 14:54
  Camilla: So, first of all, stop shoulding all over yourself.
• 14:57
  Like, do you want to write this book?
• 15:01
  You know, you've got to get honest with yourself.
• 15:03
  And funnily enough, I've had the opposite thing to you because you're
• 15:06
  like, Oh, I always want to write a book.
• 15:07
  And I hadn't, well, I think it crossed my mind, but it wasn't
• 15:11
  something I'd sort of obsessed over.
• 15:13
  And what happened was I did a business accelerator in 2019 with
• 15:17
  a company called Dent Global.
• 15:18
  And it focuses on the five P's, which is pitch, Publish, product, partnership,
• 15:24
  and I've now forgotten the fifth one, but yeah, the other thing, but
• 15:28
  publish obviously relates to a book.
• 15:30
  And normally when people go through, it was like a nine month business
• 15:32
  accelerator, you tend to grab onto one P you can't do it all at the same time.
• 15:36
  And I think that's another point to anyone listening to also remember that
• 15:40
  we can't do all the things we have to focus on one thing at a time, maybe for
• 15:43
  that week and then go on to the next.
• 15:44
  But yeah, I just, I just latched onto this publish kind of set.
• 15:48
  I was like, I want to write a book and.
• 15:52
  It basically became apparent because, you know, I was doing a lot of mining for the
• 15:57
  gold within myself during this process on, on this accelerator and thinking, you
• 16:01
  know, what, you know, what is my passion?
• 16:03
  What is my purpose?
• 16:03
  What do I want to create sort of business wise, you know, onto the next level.
• 16:07
  And it became apparent that I was basically, I felt really.
• 16:15
  Sick and tired of being part of an industry that was so invested
• 16:19
  in our lack of self worth.
• 16:21
  And that was the beauty industry and I was torn because I love weddings and events
• 16:26
  as I said, you know before and the people but The whole beauty industry side and I
• 16:30
  found more and more people, you know When I was writing articles for people or you
• 16:33
  know interviews and things are like, oh, can you give us a product recommendation?
• 16:36
  I'm like, no, it's all the same shit.
• 16:38
  Like it doesn't you know, that's not what it's about It's about you
• 16:42
  know, the power of the technique.
• 16:44
  And it's more about the techniques itself and the artistry.
• 16:46
  And that was very much what it was for me, you know, the artistry.
• 16:49
  And so I just felt like it was constantly kind of pushing products and, you know,
• 16:53
  peddling treatments and new and an inter technologies coming out all the time.
• 16:56
  It was actually severely overwhelming.
• 16:59
  And I felt like I was compounding the problem of people's lack of
• 17:03
  self confidence in themselves.
• 17:05
  And, and basically that's what I really, well, I guess.
• 17:09
  You focus on, you know, what you focus on, you kind of see more of, don't you?
• 17:13
  And I just, I just noticed time and time again that nearly every single woman
• 17:16
  that sat in my makeup chair and looked at her reflection in the mirror immediately
• 17:21
  apologized for the way that she looked and ultimately who she was or who she is.
• 17:25
  And so I wanted to just...
• 17:27
  Just write this book that probably got a bit of my anger out at the whole kind
• 17:33
  of, you know, thing, but you know, out the marketing tactics of the beauty
• 17:36
  industry, and, and sort of wake people up to the, the power that they already
• 17:42
  have within themselves and the confidence.
• 17:44
  Like we all have confidence within us.
• 17:47
  It can get knocked, you know, for various reasons, which is
• 17:50
  probably a whole other podcast.
• 17:52
  But you know, just, just.
• 17:54
  Getting people to identify, you know, the power that they have within themselves
• 17:57
  and stop turning to all the quick fixes and stop falling for all the marketing
• 18:00
  tricks and tactics of not even just the beauty industry, but just, you know,
• 18:05
  all, all marketing creates a lack, a feeling of a sense of lack within us.
• 18:09
  So I just wanted to remind people of that and just empower them really to build
• 18:13
  confidence from the inside out and not.
• 18:16
  The outside in.
• 18:17
  Becca: What an incredible mission.
• 18:20
  Why do you think it is then that the brides who sit in
• 18:23
  your chair have that feeling?
• 18:25
  Like, why is it that we all look in a mirror, and we all do it, and go...
• 18:30
  Oh, I don't like how I look.
• 18:33
  Camilla: I think, I, I, there's so, there's so many reasons I don't know
• 18:38
  which one to start with, but you know, I, I just, immediately I'm just thinking
• 18:41
  back actually to when I was in makeup school and we worked on each other.
• 18:46
  And personally, I found it really uncomfortable to sit there when it was
• 18:50
  my turn, obviously, and someone to work on me, staring at my reflection for that
• 18:54
  long, you know, long period of time.
• 18:57
  And so on that note, I think a lot of us And increasingly more so now,
• 19:02
  don't spend enough time with ourselves.
• 19:05
  We are very busy, we're sort of running around, we're quite distracting, and,
• 19:10
  it's, I think that's kind of a, a realization that, I know it's a, a
• 19:14
  reflection, but I think also, you know, we need to be spending more time getting
• 19:18
  to know ourselves and getting comfortable with ourselves and accepting ourselves.
• 19:22
  And I don't think many people are very accepting of themselves.
• 19:26
  And, you know, of course we all have that sort of need to or want to fit in.
• 19:32
  And that's really important.
• 19:34
  You know, for our survival to be, you know, within a community and to feel
• 19:39
  love and to feel safe and secure as well.
• 19:42
  And so I think that's where we have a problem with comparison and we
• 19:45
  compare ourselves to other people.
• 19:47
  And obviously that's rife now with social media and let's not even go into filters
• 19:52
  and all of that, you know, that that's tricky as well, but I think it's just.
• 19:57
  You know, people just not, not being used to themselves and, and just distracting
• 20:03
  themselves with stuff, not intentionally, but because they're just sort of so busy.
• 20:07
  And I think, you know, we, we can easily, or each of us easily can counteract that
• 20:12
  when we spend more time with ourselves, getting to know ourselves and raising
• 20:15
  our sort of self awareness on, you know, who we are and how unique we are
• 20:20
  and how wonderful that uniqueness is.
• 20:23
  Because again, you know, we had this.
• 20:26
  Kim Kardashian, when she, with the rise of like the cookie cutter faces that you saw
• 20:31
  on social media, everyone looked the same.
• 20:33
  And that was, you know, the contouring technique that has been around and
• 20:36
  makeup artists have used for ages because it's a drag technique.
• 20:39
  So of course, it's going to completely change your bone structure.
• 20:42
  But I think that's when there was a kind of a real sort of shift and people.
• 20:46
  Basically making themselves look like everybody else.
• 20:48
  And that was on a physical, but I think everybody tries to be
• 20:51
  like everybody else as well.
• 20:53
  And that's, that's uncomfortable.
• 20:55
  That actually moves you further away from yourself, rather than
• 20:58
  bringing you back towards yourself.
• 21:00
  And that's what we need to be doing in order to feel confident about who we are.
• 21:04
  Becca: I think it's absolutely fascinating.
• 21:06
  I could talk to you about this all day, especially, and I see all of the
• 21:09
  time, you know, I was talking to you before we hit record about how we had
• 21:13
  our wedding business retreat last week.
• 21:14
  And one of the things that we do as part of that is give everyone a brand shoot
• 21:18
  and everyone got their photos back.
• 21:20
  And most people have loved them, but people are so critical about themselves.
• 21:24
  Oh, I don't like how I look like this.
• 21:25
  I look a little bit fat in this picture or my arms a little bit awkward.
• 21:29
  But when I look at the pictures.
• 21:31
  not as them.
• 21:32
  You know, I'm looking at pictures of other people.
• 21:33
  All I see is beautiful photos.
• 21:36
  I see these wonderful photos of them looking really professional.
• 21:39
  And those little details, I just don't even notice them.
• 21:42
  I'm just looking in the eyes of the person.
• 21:43
  I'm not looking at their waistline or their, you know, their hairline or the
• 21:47
  way that they're holding their arm.
• 21:49
  But yet we, we stopped putting those images out because we are
• 21:53
  so critical all of, of ourselves.
• 21:55
  And I think it's just really sad.
• 21:58
  Camilla: Yeah, yeah, this is the thing, you know, we, we are the
• 22:02
  center of our own universe, aren't we?
• 22:04
  And we think, you know, we just, we hone in so much on, on things and, you
• 22:08
  know, I've had the same with people in the makeup chair, and there's this,
• 22:11
  amazing book called, and, and actually it was a bit of inspiration for my book,
• 22:14
  Maxwell Waltz, I want to say, Psycho Cybernetics it's called, you know, and
• 22:17
  he was, he just talks about, You know, actually the problem not being in how
• 22:22
  we look, it's what we're, you know, if it's, I don't know, we don't like
• 22:25
  our nose, for example, it's, you know, whatever kind of beliefs or potentially
• 22:31
  like past trauma that we're channeling into our nose that, you know, or a
• 22:35
  feature on our face or something about our body, that's the, that's the issue.
• 22:38
  And so, yeah, that's why he was, you know, a surgeon and he'd do this completely
• 22:42
  transformative surgeries on some people and they, you know, afterwards they
• 22:46
  look in the mirror and it's like.
• 22:47
  It hasn't changed.
• 22:48
  They literally couldn't see the difference.
• 22:50
  They just felt exactly the same.
• 22:52
  And so it's nothing to do with the outside.
• 22:54
  It's very much what's going on on the inside of us.
• 22:57
  And that is, you know, this is the problem.
• 23:00
  And cosmetic surgery, you know, was on the rise before now.
• 23:04
  It's more kind of Botox and fillers and things.
• 23:07
  And you can have as much of that as you want.
• 23:10
  You can use as much, you know, makeup as you want, but actually it's
• 23:13
  not going to change how you feel.
• 23:15
  And that's very much why.
• 23:17
  I was called into doing what I do now.
• 23:20
  Obviously I still have the agency.
• 23:21
  So I told you about phase one earlier with, with makeup school, the bridal
• 23:24
  agency, but, you know, confident, the confidence coaching and lifestyle
• 23:27
  coaching that I do, because I wanted to make lasting change and, and again,
• 23:31
  not be privy to the quick fixing and kind of supporting the problem where
• 23:36
  it's, you know, I wanted to help people do the work inside that then creates.
• 23:41
  the long lasting change that means also people save a lot of money if
• 23:45
  not having to, you know, buy all this makeup and, you know, on this cosmetic
• 23:49
  procedures or, you know, even fashion.
• 23:51
  It happens with clothing as well.
• 23:53
  We're not feeling good enough and we attach onto labels or, you know, style.
• 23:57
  And again, style is great expression of who you are and, you know,
• 24:01
  makeup can be fun and used for that.
• 24:03
  And it's a great expression too.
• 24:05
  But they're great tools, not, they shouldn't be used as crutches, you know,
• 24:09
  you should be fine without these things.
• 24:11
  Well, you should be better than fine.
• 24:12
  You should be awesome without these things.
• 24:14
  You just use these things to enhance and kind of decorate rather than
• 24:18
  being reliant on them in order to feel good about yourself.
• 24:21
  Becca: So we're basically trying to fix the wrong things, aren't we?
• 24:23
  We're trying to do quick fixes like, Oh, I just stop eating and lose loads of
• 24:26
  weight or I'll just go and have surgery on my face and then I'll feel better.
• 24:31
  But actually, we probably won't feel better because we
• 24:33
  haven't done that in a work.
• 24:34
  Now I know there'll be people listening to this who are really
• 24:37
  resonating with exactly what we're saying and thinking, yeah, this is me.
• 24:40
  I don't like how I look in pictures.
• 24:42
  So I'd really love, as I've got you here, for us to just be able to
• 24:45
  share some really practical advice that the wedding business owners.
• 24:49
  listening can start to channel and to try and change some of this
• 24:53
  mindset, to try and undo some of these negative beliefs about themselves.
• 24:56
  So I've got a couple of different scenarios I'd love to share with you
• 24:59
  to just get your thoughts and feedback on really, and to think if there's
• 25:02
  practical things that people can do to change their mindset around these things.
• 25:06
  So the first one, we've mentioned it a little bit, is comparisonitis.
• 25:11
  So I know a lot of my wedding business owners look at other
• 25:14
  people's businesses on Instagram or Facebook and feel like everyone
• 25:18
  else is more successful than them.
• 25:19
  And therefore they must be doing something wrong or everyone else
• 25:22
  looks better than them, or they're too old, or they're too young.
• 25:26
  Like I have it both ends of the spectrum.
• 25:27
  I'm too old to be successful.
• 25:28
  I'm too young to be successful.
• 25:30
  I'm not living in the right past.
• 25:32
  part of the world to be successful.
• 25:33
  Whatever it is, they have this comparisonitis.
• 25:35
  So do you have any thoughts about how we can help ourselves and stop
• 25:39
  getting ourself in that mindset?
• 25:41
  Camilla: Well, firstly, I just want to hold my hands up and say, that,
• 25:44
  you know, that affects me too.
• 25:45
  That still, you know, as much as I'm aware of it, it still affects me too.
• 25:49
  And that's why this love hate thing for social media.
• 25:52
  And you know, it's other ways you see out in the real world too, but I think social
• 25:56
  media really exacerbates that problem.
• 25:58
  And it's really hard for us as business owners because
• 26:03
  we have to be on it as well.
• 26:05
  And, you know, people say, yeah, but, you know, you're a content creator,
• 26:07
  you're not a content consumer, you know, don't consume, but you
• 26:09
  still have to be on the platform.
• 26:11
  So you're kind of treading that, that fine line.
• 26:13
  So I just want to say, I totally understand.
• 26:15
  And it's not something I don't think we're ever fully going to get rid of.
• 26:17
  So we just have to train our brain to focus on other things, i.
• 26:23
  e.
• 26:23
  What you are doing and not what everybody else is doing and what you have to give
• 26:27
  and not what everybody else has to give.
• 26:29
  Because, of course, there will be people out there that are way better
• 26:33
  at things than you are, but you are better and way better at things,
• 26:38
  at other things, than they are.
• 26:39
  And that's where your focus should be.
• 26:42
  You know, not what on every, not what everyone else has, but what you have.
• 26:45
  And the problem is, when you compare yourself to others or you're, you're
• 26:48
  just even looking too much at other people, then you start, You know, you
• 26:53
  start manipulating your own actions, you start changing the way you behave, the
• 26:56
  things you start doing, and that actually is going to draw the wrong things to
• 27:01
  you, the wrong opportunities to you.
• 27:04
  So it's just kind of a reframe.
• 27:06
  I guess what I'm trying to say is, is have a think about it another way.
• 27:09
  And, you know, if you're, if you feel you're.
• 27:12
  You know, too old, for example, to be starting a business or, you know, you're
• 27:16
  past it now, go and find information that supports the opposite view of that.
• 27:21
  And because there's so much out there, you know, like JK Rowling, for example,
• 27:25
  and you only have to Google it and you'll get so many people like, you know, Walt
• 27:28
  Disney, the, the ages of people building sort of business or having success.
• 27:33
  And again, it really smashes that whole like overnight success thing
• 27:36
  right out of the park when you see.
• 27:38
  All the stuff that's, you know, gone behind and the work that's
• 27:42
  had to go in to get people there.
• 27:45
  And again, it goes back to what we're saying at the beginning of
• 27:47
  this chat, where there's, there's no way around gaining that experience.
• 27:51
  And the more you do, the more you learn and the more confidence you
• 27:55
  build and the better at things.
• 27:56
  You get and the best, you know, what you like and what you don't like.
• 28:00
  And I think that's extremely important because you're running your own business.
• 28:04
  You're in charge of your own time and what you do.
• 28:07
  So you might as well make it something that you enjoy and something that's
• 28:11
  in line with you and focus on that.
• 28:14
  And that way you're going to have, you're just naturally going to glow.
• 28:16
  People are going to be drawn to you and you're going to have success with it.
• 28:20
  If you don't do that and you're chasing the money or.
• 28:23
  you know, chasing what other people are doing and, you know, spending far
• 28:26
  too much focusing outside of yourself rather than inside of yourself, then
• 28:30
  you're not going to get very far.
• 28:32
  Becca: Really, really helpful.
• 28:33
  Okay.
• 28:33
  Scenario two.
• 28:34
  I'm really testing you today.
• 28:36
  I'm going to take you all over the place.
• 28:37
  Scenario two is again, something I see a lot.
• 28:39
  So I teach marketing to wedding business owners.
• 28:42
  I talk a lot about being visible, getting yourself out there, showing up
• 28:45
  as yourself, being unapologetically you.
• 28:48
  And they say to me.
• 28:49
  I don't want to put my face out there.
• 28:51
  I can't possibly do a reel.
• 28:52
  I hate the sound of my voice.
• 28:53
  I don't want to talk to the camera.
• 28:55
  I don't want my face anywhere on my website.
• 28:58
  I don't like anything about myself.
• 29:00
  Can I do it a different way?
• 29:02
  And I always say to them, just be yourself.
• 29:04
  But you know, there's deep work for them to do there.
• 29:07
  So if there's people here who are just scared of putting themselves
• 29:09
  out there, like if you've got any thoughts or helpful tips for them.
• 29:13
  Camilla: Sure, this is such a, such a common one, please put your face out
• 29:18
  there, because that is what people connect with, and particularly online, it is so
• 29:23
  noisy, it's pretty oversaturated, kind of everywhere, people don't connect
• 29:28
  with yet another image of, like, a cake, or a makeup, or, you know, Chair
• 29:33
  coverings, I don't know, for example, like people connect with people.
• 29:37
  And of course you want to showcase your work there, but it's so
• 29:39
  important that you do show your face.
• 29:41
  So I think number one is just realize how important that it is
• 29:46
  in order to be seen and be heard.
• 29:49
  Now, number two, I totally get the confidence thing and, you know, it also
• 29:53
  can feel like quite egotistical as well and self centered to be putting that out.
• 29:57
  So, there's probably a few beliefs that you're harboring there.
• 30:01
  So again, that's kind of the inner work and you might want to do a
• 30:03
  bit of journaling around that.
• 30:05
  And I really encourage...
• 30:07
  well, as I've said, you know, getting to know yourself is so important,
• 30:10
  but taking intentional time out, even if it's just 10 minutes every single
• 30:13
  day to do, you know, either some thinking by yourself, some writing,
• 30:17
  journaling, writing's really good.
• 30:19
  And, you know, or even just talking out loud.
• 30:21
  I was out walking the other day and I was, I live in the countryside.
• 30:24
  There's no one around.
• 30:25
  I'm having a whole conversation with myself, just trying to hash
• 30:27
  out what's going on in my brain.
• 30:29
  But you know, that's, that's really helpful to get to
• 30:32
  the root of actually what's.
• 30:33
  Getting in your way because it's you that's getting in your way.
• 30:36
  And so you need to find out what the belief is that is causing that.
• 30:40
  And you know, the third thing is anything that you haven't done before is scary.
• 30:45
  It's uncomfortable, it's difficult, and the only way it's not going to be scary
• 30:50
  and not be uncomfortable and become easy.
• 30:52
  is by doing it.
• 30:53
  So I always say, set yourself a little challenge.
• 30:56
  And you know, I had a bit of a social media break, since I
• 30:58
  moved here, so for February and yeah, it was a good few months.
• 31:02
  I wasn't really online.
• 31:03
  So to get myself back in it, I committed to going, well, I didn't go live.
• 31:07
  I would have liked to on the stories, but yeah, the reception
• 31:10
  around here wasn't great.
• 31:11
  So I did a video every single day of the week for 30 days, I think it was
• 31:16
  like 35 in the end, and, you know, it was uncomfortable and some days I
• 31:19
  didn't want to do it, but, you know, I showed up and did it anyway, and now
• 31:23
  I've got no problem because I felt a bit of anxiety, or like, or also like,
• 31:27
  oh, what do I say, or what do I...
• 31:29
  You know, yeah, it was just really, I didn't know what to say online or, you
• 31:33
  know, how to be, and just doing that for 35 days, like it just got easier.
• 31:37
  I was glad it was over.
• 31:38
  I'm not going to be doing that, you know, again in that stint, but,
• 31:42
  you know, it builds the habit and then it makes it easier for you.
• 31:45
  So it's like the short, sharp kind of burst to get the motivation and
• 31:48
  momentum and build your ease with it, and then you can dial it back down.
• 31:52
  So that, doing that little challenge yourself somehow
• 31:54
  would be, would be useful.
• 31:56
  Becca: I think it's really helpful for people to understand that, you know,
• 31:59
  you, me, people that are listening to this podcast might think, oh
• 32:02
  yeah, they've got it all together.
• 32:03
  We're struggling with this ourselves.
• 32:05
  I love that you shared that moment of like, actually I had to get back online
• 32:09
  and I had to do these things because it is easy for us to look at other people
• 32:12
  and think they've got it all together.
• 32:14
  But all of us are having these conversations with ourselves.
• 32:17
  All of the time, and all of us are struggling with self sabotage.
• 32:20
  That's something that I see in my wedding business owners all of the time.
• 32:24
  Like they're the, it's hard to get through some.
• 32:26
  It's like, you're just standing in your own way.
• 32:28
  Just let it go.
• 32:29
  Self sabotage is a big thing.
• 32:31
  What can we do about that?
• 32:32
  Camilla: 100%.
• 32:33
  Well, I have something for that exactly, actually.
• 32:36
  Because it's, it's super common with my clients.
• 32:39
  Self sabotaging kind of behaviors, and again, getting to the root cause of that.
• 32:42
  So I've got a few free resources on the website, actually, but
• 32:45
  one of them is a self sabotage, a self sabotage masterclass.
• 32:48
  So, , it's about 30 minutes long, and I highly recommend anyone, like, if, you
• 32:53
  know, you've resonated with anything that we've just spoken about, to go, to
• 32:57
  go and check that out and download it.
• 32:58
  And it just, yeah, it just goes through it, and it just gets you
• 33:01
  thinking a different way about.
• 33:03
  There's, there's always something.
• 33:04
  You're not stupid.
• 33:05
  You know, none of us are stupid.
• 33:06
  So we're gaining something by not doing something we feel we ought to do.
• 33:11
  So we need to find out what that is so we can like switch it around.
• 33:15
  And I've also in my book, got, there's a chapter called The Three P's, which
• 33:19
  is, pain, pleasure, and perception.
• 33:21
  And so it talks about relinking, you know, what you assign pain to
• 33:25
  and what you assign pleasure to.
• 33:26
  And you can easily do that.
• 33:28
  You know, when you change your perception on that and, and sort of relinking things.
• 33:32
  So, you know, that's, that's another, another way of looking
• 33:35
  things to get yourself out of this rut, I guess, that you're in
• 33:39
  that's, you know, stem from limiting beliefs that are holding you back.
• 33:43
  Becca: And we have so many limiting beliefs, don't we?
• 33:45
  I mean, for myself, I put a lot of photos of myself online.
• 33:48
  I do a lot of videos and people are like, Oh, that's so great that you're confident
• 33:51
  to put your face out there everywhere.
• 33:53
  And sometimes my friends make fun of me, my non business friends, they're like,
• 33:56
  Oh, your face all over the internet.
• 33:57
  And I've had to.
• 33:58
  frame that belief because if I thought too much on that I would hide away
• 34:02
  and never turn my phone back on again.
• 34:04
  But actually I say to them, yeah, but I'm helping people grow their businesses.
• 34:08
  So if I didn't show up and put my face on camera and give them the advice,
• 34:11
  then they would be still struggling.
• 34:13
  So.
• 34:14
  You can get over the fact you've got a cutesy in my face because I know
• 34:17
  that I'm helping other people and I think it's changing that narrative in
• 34:21
  our heads and realizing actually what I'm doing is serving, not like people
• 34:24
  don't care that my hair is slightly out of place because I've just given
• 34:27
  them a piece of helpful information.
• 34:29
  Camilla: Totally.
• 34:30
  And I think you, you know, you've hit the nail on the head.
• 34:32
  And one thing I will say, and I, you know, I've had these comments too.
• 34:35
  And I think back when I started out, like, I, it's weird, I will feel annoying
• 34:39
  now when I post too much, whereas when I started out I didn't feel annoying.
• 34:42
  Again, it's that, like, high vibe, you know, when you're exciting
• 34:44
  and, you know, enjoying everything.
• 34:46
  You don't really care.
• 34:47
  But a lot of people that don't have their own businesses are the first to comment.
• 34:50
  Like, oh, it's too much, oh, it's, you know.
• 34:52
  And they don't understand, so don't listen to them.
• 34:55
  we have this negativity bias anyway, where we'll latch onto the negative
• 34:58
  comment rather than the good stuff.
• 34:59
  So just, you know, wake up a bit when that happens and think, okay, I've had this
• 35:04
  one negative comment from someone, but actually what good comments have I had?
• 35:08
  And then you'll see, you know, you're actually getting
• 35:10
  more of a better response.
• 35:12
  And I think personally, you know, again, with the center of our universe,
• 35:15
  we feel like all eyes are on us.
• 35:17
  Again, as I've said, it's so busy out there.
• 35:21
  No offense, but no one is focused on you, like, you know,
• 35:24
  no one's focused on you at all.
• 35:25
  And a friend of mine, actually, we were chatting the other day, my accountability
• 35:28
  buddy, he's out in Dubai now, he's got a business out there, but he was talking
• 35:31
  about a woman that, I think she's got quite a big following on, on social media.
• 35:36
  And she was, you know, going online every day to promote a product.
• 35:40
  And, you know, it felt like too much, but she was going on like, you know,
• 35:43
  all the time, repeatedly promoting it.
• 35:46
  And.
• 35:47
  People didn't realize when she had a baby, she was pregnant the
• 35:49
  whole time for, for nine months.
• 35:51
  It was like, Oh, I didn't even know you were pregnant.
• 35:52
  And that's how much people actually don't realize, even though she was on
• 35:55
  camera every day, you know, you feel like you're doing it too much, but people
• 35:59
  aren't really taking notice or they're scrolling past, you know, you don't
• 36:02
  really know, or the tech gets interrupted.
• 36:04
  So as much as you think you've got X amount of views, it actually
• 36:07
  might not necessarily be that.
• 36:08
  So just.
• 36:09
  Just keep going.
• 36:10
  And who cares what other people think anyway?
• 36:12
  Like, they're not, they're not your people or they're not your
• 36:14
  clients or they're not your friends.
• 36:16
  Like, you know, screw them.
• 36:17
  Just, just focus on you and the ones that are drawn to you and just cultivate that.
• 36:22
  Becca: So true.
• 36:22
  And I say to my friends, if you're seeing too much of my face, feel
• 36:25
  free to unfollow me because my business advice isn't for you anyway.
• 36:28
  And then they're like it.
• 36:30
  I'm like, well, there we go.
• 36:31
  Exactly.
• 36:32
  So I think we all need to listen to this self sabotage training.
• 36:35
  I know that's going to resonate with a lot of people.
• 36:36
  So I will make sure that I link.
• 36:38
  to that in the show notes underneath.
• 36:40
  Okay, final scenario, as we are getting towards the end of our time.
• 36:43
  Being in person.
• 36:45
  Okay, I feel like coronavirus has made us all feel a lot more comfortable hiding
• 36:50
  behind a screen, networking on Facebook groups, doing everything digitally, and...
• 36:54
  That is amazing, but I do think it's still really great to get out there
• 36:58
  and be in person, going to in person and networking events, wedding shows.
• 37:02
  But confidence wise, people are really struggling with this right now
• 37:05
  because we've got cozy in our houses.
• 37:07
  So for the final round of tips, how do we feel more confident and
• 37:12
  being out there and being in person?
• 37:13
  Camilla: I totally hear you with this one.
• 37:15
  And I've actually come full circle with it.
• 37:18
  And again, it's, you know, you're saying about comfort
• 37:21
  and we're in our comfort zone.
• 37:22
  I think at some point that comfort zone is going to become uncomfortable
• 37:26
  for you if it hasn't already.
• 37:28
  And I think we've had this delay from COVID, whereas only now, I
• 37:32
  think we thought as soon as things opened up, we'd be like, yay, people.
• 37:35
  We weren't, we were like, No, I'm really comfy here.
• 37:38
  Like I've got it sorted.
• 37:39
  I can be on zoom.
• 37:41
  You know, there were things that maybe, you know, made easier, but I think, you
• 37:43
  know, a couple of years down the line, naturally we need even introverted sort
• 37:48
  of people, we do need human connection.
• 37:50
  So I think more and more people are wanting to get out, get out there a
• 37:53
  bit more, you know, they don't want to network on online, but if you're still
• 37:57
  kind of in that little cozy phase, and not quite sort of uncomfortable.
• 38:04
  I'm sure you will get there.
• 38:06
  I think you've got to have a, you know, you've got to sort of actually recognize
• 38:10
  the fact that again, the world, you know, online is super, super noisy.
• 38:15
  There's a lot of people on it.
• 38:17
  It's really hard to cut through that and make an impression
• 38:20
  on someone through a screen.
• 38:22
  The energy is not there and people really connect with energy.
• 38:25
  So for you personally, in terms of how, you know, You feeling connected
• 38:32
  and loved and cared for and supported.
• 38:34
  It's really important that you physically go and meet people.
• 38:37
  And it's also very important that the right people, because otherwise, you
• 38:40
  know, go the opposite way, but in order for, you know, for your business to
• 38:45
  thrive and to, you know, grow, you need to be out there connecting with people in
• 38:50
  person, because it will probably take you.
• 38:54
  You know, five times the amount of time online in order to have
• 38:57
  that many interactions with someone to get through to them.
• 39:00
  So you might as well save yourself some time and get yourself
• 39:03
  out there and just build the connections in person far quicker.
• 39:07
  So a bit of a reframe for you, that one really.
• 39:09
  Becca: Love it.
• 39:10
  We're basically we need to do lots of reframing and all of these different
• 39:13
  areas to help ourselves move forward.
• 39:16
  This has been such a fascinating conversation.
• 39:18
  I honestly could just keep on talking about it for hours, but
• 39:20
  we don't have hours to spare.
• 39:22
  So I will make sure I link to the self sabotage training and also to
• 39:26
  your book in the show notes so that if people want to go deeper, they can.
• 39:30
  Now I podcast with the same question.
• 39:33
  So I'm going to pose that to you now.
• 39:34
  And it's this, what is one thing you personally wish you'd known
• 39:38
  sooner in your own wedding business?
• 39:40
  Camilla: I think there's so many things, there's so many things, but I think
• 39:48
  I've already mentioned this as well.
• 39:50
  I think I wish I'd known that things were going to always be changing and
• 39:56
  so to not get too attached to things or the way things are now and really
• 40:04
  master that skill of agility and not, and not over identify with my business.
• 40:08
  I think that's actually.
• 40:10
  I'd be much further ahead with things had I not.
• 40:13
  Got so attached because that actually kept me stuck from over identifying with it,
• 40:18
  you know, very, it felt very hard to kind of move on from or change ways or pivot,
• 40:22
  you know, particularly sort of around COVID, that's been a really tricky thing.
• 40:26
  So having not got so attached to it and just always been aware that, you know, the
• 40:30
  world's evolving, I'm evolving, things are going to change and being okay with that,
• 40:33
  it would have been, yeah, a much probably smoother and quicker progress with things.
• 40:39
  Becca: Fabulous, fabulous advice for everyone.
• 40:41
  Camilla, it has been such a pleasure to have this conversation.
• 40:44
  What's coming up next for you?
• 40:45
  If people want to find out more about what you do, where's
• 40:47
  the best place for them to go?
• 40:49
  Camilla: Perfect.
• 40:49
  Thank you so much for having me.
• 40:50
  It's been fab.
• 40:51
  So, my home on the internet, my little place in the world is camillacollins.
• 40:56
  com.
• 40:56
  I tend to hang around on Instagram most.
• 40:58
  But I am on Facebook as well.
• 40:59
  So Camilla J.
• 41:00
  Collins, you'll find me on both.
• 41:02
  And I'm literally full throttle on my retreat, which is coming up in January.
• 41:06
  It's the first one I've ever run.
• 41:07
  I am bloody excited about it.
• 41:09
  It's called the Reflect and Reconnect Retreat.
• 41:12
  Very much because obviously the industry I'm in, for, you know, winning an event.
• 41:15
  Prose really, but to work on themselves because we give so much, to our
• 41:20
  couples and to our clients and, you know, while that's wonderful,
• 41:24
  we need to fill our cup up too.
• 41:26
  So while there'll be a bit sort of on business is very
• 41:28
  much a retreat for people to.
• 41:31
  reflect and reconnect with themselves and reset in a way for the new year ahead.
• 41:36
  And that's in January.
• 41:37
  Becca: It sounds very exciting.
• 41:38
  I'm excited to see more about what comes from that.
• 41:41
  I know it will be amazing event.
• 41:42
  And as you know, I think retreats are amazing.
• 41:45
  So I wish you all of the best of luck with that Camilla.
• 41:48
  It's been such a pleasure.
• 41:49
  Thanks for being here.
• 41:50
  Camilla: Thank you so much for having me.
• 41:51
  Pleasure's been all mine.
• 41:53
  Becca: What a fabulous episode.
• 41:55
  Wasn't it such an interesting conversation?
• 41:57
  And I know that it will resonate with lots of you, some of the things that Camilla
• 42:00
  shared, and it may have brought things up.
• 42:02
  So don't stop there.
• 42:04
  Do something with those thoughts.
• 42:06
  If you need to speak to someone, reach out to myself, reach out to Camilla,
• 42:09
  and maybe just stop, take a moment for yourselves and think through
• 42:12
  what is it that's holding you back?
• 42:14
  What are those limiting beliefs and how can you work on those
• 42:17
  to change the narrative?
• 42:18
  going forward.
• 42:19
  Have a fabulous week.
• 42:20
  Keep being unapologetically you and I'll see you next time.