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The Little Ones Taste Like Veal - h8dit 30 · thxh8dit

• 0:00
  So to your point, I looked the podcast up on ChatGPT because
• 0:05
  I've been looking up like things all week on it.
• 0:10
  ChatGPT thinks the host of this podcast are Justin, Ryan and
• 0:14
  Jay. I'm not even in IT fan.
• 0:20
  Did not mention Amber. I fucking say your name at the
• 0:24
  start of every episode and it didn't.
• 0:27
  It has no idea. I don't know why it doesn't.
• 0:29
  I don't understand. Does it not listen to it or does
• 0:32
  it not? I don't know, maybe just scrapes
• 0:34
  the title. It doesn't listen to it because
• 0:36
  I'm a woman. Oh, there's Justin is a
• 0:52
  germaphobe and Ryan is a giant bitch or something like that.
• 0:56
  You're the only one that doesn't have a title.
• 0:58
  I'm not important. I'm a woman.
• 1:00
  I have a vagina. The title of the episode, Amber
• 1:02
  is a woman. Oh.
• 1:04
  My God. You'll be on.
• 1:06
  Chat DPT I thought you did too. I'm pretty sure you did.
• 1:13
  ChatGPT just fuck you. Yep, no.
• 1:19
  No, not one. Not one.
• 1:23
  That's so funny. It's OK, I'll walk out one of
• 1:28
  these days and you guys will have a blast.
• 1:30
  Oh, wait. Bro day.
• 1:31
  Yeah, I'll call Colin. With the Boys, Part 3.
• 1:37
  That's going to be the name of the podcast now.
• 1:41
  Awesome with the boys Robo trace.
• 1:43
  Robo Trace. Good stuff.
• 1:47
  That's fantastic, ChatGPT. Welcome back everyone.
• 1:51
  Is a real bro every. Fucking time.
• 1:56
  Welcome back everyone to the Thanks Haiti the podcast episode
• 2:00
  29 or 3030 the big three O baby. We're catching up to Ryan's age.
• 2:08
  The greatest year? We got 10 more to go.
• 2:10
  We're. Catching up to your guy who's
• 2:12
  age first? God. 10 more to go.
• 2:16
  So I'm here with Ryan, our senior senior, our senior
• 2:23
  senior. I'm here with Amber, who ChatGPT
• 2:28
  refuses to acknowledge for some reason.
• 2:30
  Fuck your life. Bing.
• 2:32
  Bong spiked it so hard I watched it good.
• 2:36
  And Justin, your segment host for the day.
• 2:41
  Today we're doing an IQ test. Oh dear God.
• 2:45
  We're going to find out who's the smartest of the podcast.
• 2:47
  Do I need a pen and paper? Because I already have one?
• 2:50
  Do not do I win the IQ test already It's.
• 2:53
  A very stupid IQ test and it's perfect for us.
• 2:56
  Fantastic. So do you want to get the lowest
• 2:59
  points or the highest points you?
• 3:01
  Want to get the highest? But it's a very stupid IQ test.
• 3:04
  A monkey IQ test, if you will. Let's go.
• 3:07
  You can't say that 'cause you told me.
• 3:09
  I can't say that. IQ test.
• 3:11
  No, the other one. Test.
• 3:18
  We were watching something and we were watching something and
• 3:22
  there was a monkey on a guy's shoulder and I was like, oh,
• 3:25
  yucky, a monkey. And he goes.
• 3:26
  You can't call them that anymore.
• 3:29
  Said him. You can't call him, not them.
• 3:33
  You can't call them that anymore.
• 3:35
  It was exact words. His exact words.
• 3:40
  It's OK. Nobody listens to women anyway,
• 3:42
  so it doesn't matter. It comes.
• 3:44
  Out today that. Justin was the one making all
• 3:48
  those comments that he was accusing us of.
• 3:54
  Right. You mean your remarks off pod?
• 3:57
  I know. How was your week bud?
• 4:05
  It was pretty good. That's all I got for you.
• 4:09
  I don't. I don't have anything excited.
• 4:11
  To fucking you know you're. It's OK, I didn't have anything
• 4:17
  exciting happen to me. You both run a podcast.
• 4:21
  I'm just saying. Every week we do this every.
• 4:24
  Week I sit at home, I don't go on social media anymore, I don't
• 4:28
  have any friends. My family lives thousands of
• 4:32
  miles away and I was home alone for half a day on Friday.
• 4:37
  I run Oh my God, I've got a full page of notes every week.
• 4:42
  So here here's here's here's what happened to me since.
• 4:46
  If I say your name a bunch, it'll come.
• 4:49
  Amber. Oh my God, this.
• 4:52
  Is going to be your name a bunch, so it'll recognize.
• 4:56
  I even said it in the beginning of the podcasts.
• 5:00
  I I literally said it in the beginning, like the first couple
• 5:04
  of episodes. I'm not going to use my name and
• 5:07
  I hope you guys don't use my name because I hate my name.
• 5:09
  I hate hearing my name. So now is the time to say your
• 5:14
  like name that you want. So ChatGPT will like, I guess
• 5:18
  hear that, but it's got to be a male's name apparently.
• 5:21
  The name that I want is yeah. Do it, do it.
• 5:25
  Do it. Do it.
• 5:26
  Do it. I unfortunately cannot because I
• 5:30
  came up with a few new. I'll do it for you.
• 5:33
  Sound pads so I wanted to test them out.
• 5:36
  You got a new clip. I got.
• 5:38
  I got 4. New ones, Clips.
• 5:41
  They're they're clips. No, they're called bytes.
• 5:43
  Bytes. Sound bites.
• 5:44
  Sound bites. So I'll I'll run through them.
• 5:47
  Like like brownie bites? My God.
• 5:54
  Our little biscuits. Karen, the first one I think is
• 5:58
  fantastic and I might keep on the board.
• 6:02
  Time stamp that. Forever.
• 6:06
  I'll play that again. Time stamp that.
• 6:10
  Time stamp that. That's so good, I love it.
• 6:12
  Very good. #2. So confused.
• 6:19
  Yeah, so confused. So confused.
• 6:25
  I'm like, I'm doing stuff, yeah. He's going to use that next one.
• 6:34
  Every episode you get me a new. Remember to salt your meats.
• 6:43
  Yeah, I felt. Like that was a good one that
• 6:46
  needed to be played so. Remember to salt.
• 6:49
  I'm so afraid. I'm so afraid you're.
• 6:52
  Ready for the 4th 1. The 4th 1 is the best one.
• 6:54
  Yes. Hey, are you cool Cats and
• 6:58
  kittens? This is a Yeah 29 of the Thanks
• 7:03
  Hated AT podcast. It's currently 11:00 PM the day
• 7:09
  before we film the real episode with Amber.
• 7:15
  I'm here IRL with Ryan. Hello, we've come up with an
• 7:20
  idea after I intentionally put Impractical jokers on a loop on
• 7:27
  Amber's. YouTube.
• 7:30
  Yeah, her her suggested videos. So now all she gets on her
• 7:35
  YouTube suggested is Impractical Jokers.
• 7:37
  I thought it was a funny bit. So for this episode, Ryan and I
• 7:43
  are going to see how many times we can reference the Impractical
• 7:48
  Jokers in the episode without Amber noticing.
• 7:52
  We'll take a tally. Count the tally yourself,
• 7:55
  obviously. Enjoy. 4646 times.
• 8:08
  I'm currently leaned. I'm leaned away because she's
• 8:13
  ever encroaching and I feel like she's going to hit me.
• 8:19
  I have uploaded the previous episode as the final version so
• 8:25
  you can hear all the Dings that I put in.
• 8:29
  Every time we set a reference that went Ding.
• 8:34
  Did you say 40? What?
• 8:35
  46 times. We referenced it 46 times.
• 8:40
  By the way, I got 5 right off the RIP in a row by saying your
• 8:44
  e-mail addresses. She's.
• 8:48
  So pissed I can't even. I can't breathe I'm so scared.
• 8:55
  So you just lie to me all the time?
• 8:58
  Honestly. You lie to me all the fucking
• 9:01
  time. Honestly.
• 9:03
  You lie to me. You lie.
• 9:09
  You fucking lied. I asked you yesterday.
• 9:16
  So good. I asked you yesterday, I
• 9:20
  literally, I say you want to see what's really fucking funny?
• 9:23
  And I went to my YouTube page, 'cause it's normally fucking on
• 9:28
  there, and I go, oh, I guess it's not on there anymore.
• 9:30
  I could have bet a million fucking dollars that Impractical
• 9:34
  Jokers was going to pop up. And I asked you, I fucking asked
• 9:41
  you. I said was it a bit and you said
• 9:44
  no, no, why would I do that? It's a, it's a really funny
• 9:47
  fucking bit. If it was, though, it's a good
• 9:49
  idea. Don't don't ever talk to me
• 9:54
  again. I'm done.
• 9:56
  You wanted to do the joke for April Fools.
• 9:59
  This is fucking not it. I did, and then I remembered he
• 10:04
  was going to do this and I was like, all right, we can't do
• 10:08
  that. This is borderline like it's
• 10:10
  going to be for real. I'm going to walk out.
• 10:13
  Can I? No, you can't do shit.
• 10:16
  Can I? What?
• 10:19
  What do you think you can do? I almost told you like 6 times.
• 10:23
  He was texting me. There was like full last three
• 10:26
  solid times. I was like, brother, you have to
• 10:28
  tell her, I'm going to tell her. You have to tell her, you have
• 10:32
  to tell her. He was going to wait till the
• 10:33
  full episode came out April 2nd for you to listen to it on your
• 10:37
  own and then hear the intro. The original.
• 10:41
  I don't even, I don't even know what I heard.
• 10:44
  Can you play it again because I'm pissed and I blacked out.
• 10:48
  What? She looked at me the entire
• 10:50
  time. Because you were leaning I'm
• 10:52
  like, what is this? I gotta get away.
• 10:55
  I gotta get away. Okay, I'm just going to have to
• 10:58
  hear this off air. You guys did this last night or
• 11:01
  today? We did this two weeks ago when I
• 11:04
  was in Florida. Literally.
• 11:07
  You said. Episode 29.
• 11:09
  Yeah, it's the, it's the it's the start for last week's
• 11:13
  episode. There's a vein in her neck.
• 11:21
  Probably. There's a full ass vein, so you.
• 11:24
  Did an intro when you two were together without me for a an
• 11:31
  episode that we did when we were all together, Yeah.
• 11:35
  No, no, This was the episode we recorded yet last week when we
• 11:41
  were together, when we stayed the night.
• 11:44
  Well. How you mansplain exactly what I
• 11:48
  say all the fucking time. I hate you both.
• 11:50
  I I just know I'm not going to be nice in this episode.
• 11:54
  You guys fucked that you guys should have done this at the
• 11:58
  very end, so you're going to get salty fucking I don't give a
• 12:02
  fuck. So confused.
• 12:08
  You're going to get salty me. Salt your me.
• 12:13
  My fucking God, I'm done. Almost.
• 12:18
  Fucking done. Almost everything we said was a
• 12:21
  Joker's reference. Whenever you asked me if you
• 12:24
  could see my notes, I said yeah, yeah, yeah.
• 12:26
  And then I immediately shot them over to Ryan as quick as I could
• 12:29
  and then deleted them. I was like, you can't see what
• 12:31
  it says because it says quotes from Impractical Jokers.
• 12:38
  You're like, what are you reading the whole time?
• 12:40
  What are you reading? I'm like nothing.
• 12:42
  It's just my notes. I got a full page front and
• 12:49
  back. Holy shit, front and back.
• 12:53
  That's what I was reading the entire time.
• 12:55
  I was trying not to make it obvious too.
• 13:00
  When you came out of nowhere with just the like shit I've
• 13:06
  never heard, and you just said it as a bit and then you just
• 13:10
  moved on. You're like, all right, now
• 13:11
  we're going to talk about something else.
• 13:13
  It's like, what the fuck are we doing?
• 13:18
  Oh man, I sent that to some people to see what their
• 13:24
  reactions were, to see if they would be interested in the
• 13:26
  episode. And every last one of them was
• 13:29
  like, that's such a good bit. Such a good bit, such a good bit
• 13:39
  for Amber Amber, the Co host, the third host on the thanks
• 13:44
  Haiti, the podcast open AI. You fuck such a good when I said
• 13:52
  time stamp that it's because that was the one that like I
• 13:55
  used to reference. I was like, you got to remember
• 13:58
  where that is because I won't. So welcome back everyone.
• 14:04
  Oh. Man episode 30 starting off with
• 14:09
  a bang. Oh, the big three of So Ryan's
• 14:15
  week was nothing but editing and trying to figure out how to do
• 14:20
  that episode. My week was travelling
• 14:23
  everywhere and I had a show this weekend at the Pimento Cheese
• 14:34
  Festival. Right.
• 14:39
  I have no idea why there's a pimento cheese festivals.
• 14:46
  It was good. We had a pimento on fries that
• 14:49
  was pretty good. Now they do a bunch of different
• 14:52
  vendors and even if they're not like a food vendor, they'll just
• 14:54
  do something pimento themed like earrings and necklaces and
• 14:58
  whatever they were doing. But it was a really neat show.
• 15:00
  Really good show. This one's for you.
• 15:04
  The booth next to me was a candy booth and they had dye free
• 15:13
  organic cotton candy and I know you love the organic.
• 15:20
  What the fuck is dye free organic cotton candy?
• 15:25
  What does that mean? Is that is that just sugar?
• 15:28
  What is? What is brown sugar organic?
• 15:30
  Cotton candy. Is that just sugar?
• 15:34
  Brown sugar. So they could have just said
• 15:37
  cotton candy. What the fuck is the organic
• 15:40
  part? I don't understand.
• 15:44
  I I have no clue. That's that's the question for
• 15:46
  you. What is the organic part?
• 15:47
  I don't. Know, I don't get it.
• 15:49
  I don't know. I don't either, but good show.
• 15:52
  I thought you'd love that one. I know how you love that organic
• 15:55
  title on everything. It's the worst.
• 16:01
  Didn't do a whole lot. We're selling the boat.
• 16:05
  Oh, really? Yeah, so if we want to do that
• 16:10
  episode, we can do it still. I'm going to be in touch with
• 16:14
  the owner after the sale, so the boats still going to be usable.
• 16:18
  But yeah, we're going to go ahead and sell the boat.
• 16:21
  I got so sad. As soon as I got off the phone I
• 16:23
  got so sad. Good.
• 16:25
  Oh. It was your boat too, I.
• 16:27
  Don't go fuck. So boats getting sold probably
• 16:33
  next week, week after, trucks getting sold this week, week
• 16:39
  after. Don't know.
• 16:42
  You can't be mad at me. Oh, we can talk after the
• 16:46
  fucking podcast. I literally, I tried so hard
• 16:50
  every time you kept asking me questions.
• 16:52
  I don't know if you noticed, I started laughing and like had to
• 16:54
  turn my face because I was like, I got to tell her.
• 16:56
  I got to tell her. It's so funny.
• 16:58
  I got to tell her like. I'm just glad that you can
• 17:00
  fucking lie to me with no problem again.
• 17:02
  It was a problem I felt no. It's no fucking problem.
• 17:06
  He was so sad. He was constantly texting me.
• 17:08
  You've got to say something like, let me tell her it was a.
• 17:14
  Non-stop you can read the text. I hope you don't sleep tonight.
• 17:19
  Me too. You ain't getting pussy for a
• 17:22
  while my guy. Oh man.
• 17:29
  You said it earlier today too. I barely give you sex anymore so
• 17:33
  hope you like your hand. Eat a Dick.
• 17:36
  Bringing it right onto the pod. Oh, 100%.
• 17:40
  She's in rare form today. Don't worry, I don't get any
• 17:45
  either. Now we're going to talk to the
• 17:49
  doctor and pretty much tell him like, hey, we have to do
• 17:53
  something about this like bedridden thing because of her
• 17:57
  foot because it's starting to do like bed sores.
• 18:00
  Like all she can do, like per the doctor is lay down.
• 18:06
  And what is it not etiquette when you lift your foot up?
• 18:10
  I don't know, elevate? I had AI fucking lost it right
• 18:14
  there. All you can do is lay down and
• 18:17
  elevate your foot. And that's what she's done for a
• 18:19
  year and a half, going on two years.
• 18:20
  So it's like, brother, if we're going to continue this, we got
• 18:23
  to like fix something because it's starting to like 'cause
• 18:26
  real problems. So yeah, apparently breaking
• 18:32
  your foot causes all sorts of other issues and it's fucking
• 18:35
  bullshit. So.
• 18:38
  Yeah, that's I'm. Trying to figure that out too,
• 18:40
  but selling the boat, selling the truck.
• 18:46
  And then I did that festival this weekend.
• 18:48
  That was pretty cool. But if y'all don't have any
• 18:51
  updates from the week, I've got a couple segments and a couple
• 18:54
  topics. I got that.
• 18:56
  I got just did Uber. Nothing really all that
• 19:02
  exciting, although we did have a tornado roll through here
• 19:08
  yesterday to the point where when I was out helping my buddy
• 19:15
  with yard work, that's where the the stepladder joke came in.
• 19:19
  What did he do in stepladder? We got almost done.
• 19:24
  We were like 2 parts, 3 parts away from being completely done
• 19:30
  with what we were planning on finishing that day.
• 19:33
  And then the rain just started pouring and we're like OK, let's
• 19:36
  get all the tools inside and everything like that.
• 19:38
  So we did that on my way home from his house, which is not
• 19:42
  terribly far away. 5 minute drive it tornado warning popped
• 19:49
  up on my phone. No watch, just the warning
• 19:52
  popped up and it just started getting worse and worse and I
• 19:57
  got home. I finally.
• 19:58
  Got. The watch is 1 where the systems
• 20:04
  are right to form a tornado and the warning is a funnel cloud
• 20:12
  has been spotted so. Damn.
• 20:16
  Not not necessarily tornado on the ground, but the funnel cloud
• 20:20
  is in the air, so. I've got a picture I'll give you
• 20:25
  for the thumbnail of this one and it's funnel cloud over by
• 20:33
  can't remember where it was had to be somewhere in Deltona,
• 20:41
  Lower DeLand. Yeah Cuz as soon as you get off
• 20:44
  that road you'd go left. Yeah.
• 20:46
  So right, right around the boat there was I mean you, you can
• 20:51
  see it clear as day in the picture.
• 20:52
  It's halfway to the ground. It is a full blown what looks
• 20:56
  like an F2 dude. It's insane how big this thing
• 20:59
  is. And I just watched it in front
• 21:01
  of me. I was like get the fuck out long
• 21:03
  enough to take a picture and everything like.
• 21:06
  Yeah. So we had that.
• 21:07
  Yeah, that. That happened.
• 21:09
  I sent a picture out my front window to my mom and I said hey
• 21:13
  tornado warning, it feels like home.
• 21:17
  And. Literally 2 1/2 hours later she
• 21:20
  sent me a picture out her front window and said hey same ZS
• 21:25
  tornado warning here, same conditions.
• 21:29
  Like it was insane. 2 1/2 hours to the T that that that.
• 21:35
  Had this big front, this big front that would just went
• 21:39
  through like today. This morning I was watching it
• 21:43
  on the radar and it's the perfect like tornado starter.
• 21:48
  It's literally just a big arm that swipes across that like 30
• 21:52
  or 40 miles an hour and it's a perfect tornado starter.
• 21:55
  I was like, uh oh, yeah. Serendipitously, I just happened
• 22:00
  to be watching videos of tornadoes on YouTube this week.
• 22:02
  Like never done that before. I was just like, huh, what is
• 22:06
  the deadliest tornado of all time?
• 22:08
  And then like I saw that on the radar this morning.
• 22:10
  I'm like fuck me dude. Yeah, the Joplin tornado is
• 22:17
  probably. I watched that.
• 22:18
  One. Yeah, that one's, that's a crazy
• 22:19
  one. I watched a bunch of them.
• 22:23
  So the one, so this one that I watched, it was literally the
• 22:27
  day after Joplin happened. So the Joplin tornado and then
• 22:32
  the one literally 24 hours later was it was so strong.
• 22:37
  It wasn't as big obviously, but it was stronger.
• 22:40
  They measured like 330 miles an hour and it was the strongest
• 22:44
  winds ever recorded on earth. It dug A trench, you know, miles
• 22:50
  long, like 3 feet into the ground.
• 22:53
  Dude, what the fuck? Yeah, tornadoes are new.
• 22:57
  Like how do you what the fuck dude?
• 23:00
  It was pulling storm doors off the shelters.
• 23:03
  Like fuck you, I'm good. I'm so good.
• 23:07
  I'm not living anywhere near the Midwest.
• 23:10
  I'm, I'm talking Texas all the way to Canada.
• 23:13
  I'm good because that was the other one.
• 23:16
  Like one of them travelled like, into Canada.
• 23:19
  Like, fuck that. Yeah.
• 23:21
  No, no, no. One of my favorite stories of,
• 23:24
  of my dad, or at least my time growing up and witnessing the
• 23:29
  absolute glory that is my dad. He tornado sirens are going off,
• 23:39
  you know, just going off. He's outside under this little
• 23:43
  overhang we had grilling, grilling during like actual wind
• 23:48
  tornado conditions with the sirens going off.
• 23:52
  My mom told him to come inside. He goes.
• 23:54
  The stakes aren't done yet. Absolute fucking legend.
• 24:02
  Oh man, I'll never forget that he doesn't remember this.
• 24:05
  My mom doesn't remember it but I do so oh man.
• 24:11
  It's very good. Sky is green and everything.
• 24:14
  Rain is pouring down like steaks aren't done.
• 24:18
  I got to finish them. I don't know what you want from
• 24:21
  me. I can't rush.
• 24:23
  God. Oh man, so the segments and
• 24:35
  topics I've got this week was something I just remembered from
• 24:41
  going out to eat with Amber over the week.
• 24:44
  We went to a place called Something Tavern.
• 24:48
  Doesn't matter the place, really cool place, good food.
• 24:50
  But I remember sitting there with her, and for some reason I
• 24:56
  was, like, motioning with my hand, like a hippo's mouth
• 25:01
  closing, like saying something. But the bartender looked at me
• 25:07
  and it looked to him as if I was telling her shush with my hand
• 25:12
  to do like in her. Yeah, like from the master of
• 25:16
  disguise. I I you're doing this, I want
• 25:19
  you to do this. It looked just like that.
• 25:22
  And I'm looking at him and he's looking at me.
• 25:23
  And I'm like, that's not what I was doing, but that one was
• 25:30
  pretty good. I remember that.
• 25:32
  And then where I found out with my nephew staying up here with
• 25:40
  us for the last month that he has severe dyslexia and he
• 25:47
  writes backwards. And I don't mean he writes his
• 25:51
  B's as D's and his P's as Q's. I mean he writes the letters
• 25:55
  backwards. He starts AG from the bottom, an
• 25:59
  O from the middle and AD from the middle and then makes the
• 26:04
  bulge and then goes up. He, like, writes in reverse
• 26:10
  cursive, but it's not cursive. It's just horrific handwriting.
• 26:15
  So we get to talking with his mother.
• 26:17
  My sister and I haven't even told Amber this because I saved
• 26:22
  it for the cast. She said, yeah, I remember when
• 26:27
  you used to do that and my sister's a a storyteller.
• 26:32
  So I looked at her and I said, the fuck I did there ain't it
• 26:37
  never happened. There ain't no way.
• 26:39
  I wrote backwards as a kid. She's like, yeah, used to do
• 26:43
  that all the time. I'm like, you're full of shit,
• 26:45
  whatever you say, just fucking with me, right?
• 26:49
  We're driving back home and I brought it up to my mother and I
• 26:55
  said, did I used to write backwards?
• 26:57
  And she goes, oh, yeah. And I went how backwards?
• 27:05
  And she goes, it was really bad. We brought like we got brought
• 27:10
  into your like, school repeatedly in like first and 2nd
• 27:13
  grade because you wrote backwards and it was fine.
• 27:17
  You knew how to spell, you knew how to, you knew what you were
• 27:19
  writing, but for some reason you wrote from the bottom and from
• 27:22
  the left. Like it didn't make any sense.
• 27:25
  You were the only and I was, I asked I'm like, was that common?
• 27:29
  And she goes, no, I've never met another kid that did that.
• 27:33
  And I'm like, awesome. So I had dyslexia and y'all beat
• 27:37
  it out of me is what you're telling me.
• 27:40
  Nobody knew what this was. I don't do that anymore,
• 27:43
  hilariously. Oh.
• 27:45
  Man. So yeah, that's that's a new
• 27:48
  thing for Amber. She didn't know that either.
• 27:51
  Apparently I had mild or severe dyslexia and.
• 27:54
  Got it beaten out of you. Didn't know that and had it
• 27:58
  beaten out of me, so there's that.
• 28:00
  We used to like your mouth country.
• 28:09
  Oh my God. Oh man.
• 28:12
  So sticking sticking with my new found dyslexia diagnosis.
• 28:17
  I was so tired and wore out after a show Saturday that I
• 28:25
  followed my GPS to a Walmart because I needed to get non
• 28:29
  alcoholic wine some things and some things and I was like
• 28:33
  there. It's the only place that has all
• 28:34
  that in one. So I pull up to the Walmart and
• 28:38
  the GPS is telling me go another like, you know, 400 yards, right
• 28:42
  Then take a right and I'm I'm standing in front of the
• 28:44
  building. I'm looking at the Walmart and
• 28:45
  I'm like, I'm here. I don't need to I don't need any
• 28:48
  further directions. Siri, thanks.
• 28:50
  So shut the GPS off, get out, walk in the store and I go to
• 28:54
  grab a cart and it's stuck and I'm like, oh fuck.
• 28:57
  I go to grab another cart and another guy grabs the cart with
• 29:00
  me and I let go and he lets go. And then we have an awkward
• 29:03
  thing and then I'm like, fuck it, I'll just take the cart.
• 29:05
  And I'm I'm so tired. I'm like, thanks, appreciate it.
• 29:07
  Gone. I go, I go to start walking and
• 29:09
  I go, man, that's a really big cart.
• 29:11
  That's a huge cart. The fuck is going on here?
• 29:14
  And I'm just not even, I'm not even here.
• 29:17
  I walk like 50 feet into this store and I realize I'm standing
• 29:21
  in a Sam's Club. I am fully asleep at the wheel
• 29:29
  of this cart and I go, where the fuck am I?
• 29:35
  So I Google, can I check out at a Sam's Club without a
• 29:39
  membership? And they're like, no, I'm like,
• 29:41
  what the fuck? How did I get here?
• 29:44
  I don't even know. I, I, I don't understand if they
• 29:47
  let me in or what, but I, I, I was wearing sunglasses.
• 29:51
  I had a lanyard on from the show.
• 29:52
  I just walked straight by. I'm assuming they were supposed
• 29:55
  to say something, don't know. So walk straight through got
• 29:58
  like 50 feet in and I'm like, huh, this looks like a BJS Where
• 30:02
  am I? I go to walk back out and of
• 30:06
  course they're like weird with the entry.
• 30:08
  So you can't, the doors don't open, you got to walk through
• 30:11
  the line and then walk back through and then they got to
• 30:14
  check your shit at the door. And I walk up with no nothing in
• 30:17
  my cart and they ask. They go to ask and he's like OK
• 30:22
  go ahead and I just leave and I put the cart up and I leave.
• 30:26
  What the fuck man? Completely asleep at the wheel.
• 30:30
  That's so funny. Oh.
• 30:31
  I love it. So I found out I've got a
• 30:34
  learning disability and I clearly still have it.
• 30:40
  So with that said, here we go on our segment for the day, our IQ
• 30:47
  test. This IQ community test is
• 30:54
  brought to you by the BuzzFeed community stamp that I thought
• 31:00
  for sure that get a laugh an IQ test from BuzzFeed.
• 31:03
  Are you shitting me? I.
• 31:06
  I don't trust a single. All right, All right.
• 31:13
  First question, are we ready? No.
• 31:16
  Do you want to play? No, OK, We're asked if we were
• 31:22
  ready. I thought that was one of the
• 31:23
  questions. That's very good.
• 31:28
  That's very good. That's good stuff.
• 31:32
  I can't. I'm stupid.
• 31:36
  You can't be mad at me. I'm so mad.
• 31:38
  I'm slow. So am I did.
• 31:42
  He not. Receive enough everybody.
• 31:44
  As a kid, I never believed not. For me.
• 31:50
  All right. First question, are we ready?
• 31:52
  No. Yes, that is my answer to #1.
• 31:55
  OK, duly noted. The question is where can you
• 32:00
  find the city or of Corinth? Corinthia.
• 32:06
  It says Corinth. Where can you find the city of
• 32:08
  Corinth? That was my answer was
• 32:10
  Corinthia. Do you need multiple choice the?
• 32:13
  UK. Does do you need multiple
• 32:17
  choice? So I'll narrow it down.
• 32:20
  Southern Greece, Northern Greece, Western Greece, Eastern
• 32:24
  Greece. Clearly it's in Greece.
• 32:27
  Which way again? BuzzFeed IQ test.
• 32:32
  Are you doing it per person? Yeah, each one of you takes a a
• 32:37
  stab. Let's go north.
• 32:38
  I'm going to say Western, yeah. All right, Ryan's got N, Amber's
• 32:43
  got W I've got the South of Greece.
• 32:46
  Oh God, Which is just water. So southern Greece is correct
• 32:57
  all? Right.
• 33:01
  So far the learning developed kid is the smartest.
• 33:08
  I'm going to get a diagnosis now.
• 33:11
  Second, second question. Which country produces more
• 33:15
  coffee than anywhere else in the world?
• 33:21
  I've got France, Brazil, America, India.
• 33:27
  I'm thinking Brazil or India. Wait, which coffee produces more
• 33:33
  or which country? Which country produces more
• 33:36
  coffee than anywhere else in the world?
• 33:38
  I'm going to say Brazil. I'll play along at home.
• 33:41
  I'll be. India.
• 33:43
  Ryan Witchers. India.
• 33:45
  I'm going Brazil. Brazil is correct.
• 33:54
  Ryan, you're a big dumb dumb, OK?
• 33:56
  It's just random questions. No, it's an IQ test from
• 34:01
  BuzzFeed, right? It even says who's the smartest
• 34:04
  over your friend group. It's not.
• 34:08
  It's a trivia game. What are the?
• 34:13
  What are the three primary colors?
• 34:16
  Red. Would you like me to tell you
• 34:19
  the multiple choice? It's.
• 34:24
  Primary colors, yeah, Not what's on your game station, OK.
• 34:31
  White. Rib, that is one of the answers.
• 34:37
  So the three primary colors. Red, yellow, and green, red,
• 34:42
  white and blue, red, green and yellow, red, yellow, and blue.
• 34:47
  Would you like to hear them again?
• 34:48
  Yes. Because it's not.
• 34:54
  I'm going to mansplain something here real quick.
• 34:57
  There are there are two types of primary color wheels.
• 35:03
  Why? Because one's actually better
• 35:07
  for doing actual art, and the other is what we traditionally
• 35:12
  thought as the primary colors. Did you take art classes?
• 35:17
  No, but I use too busy with theaters photography.
• 35:20
  I use the. Other one for photography.
• 35:24
  I was in multiple art classes and the answer is still the same
• 35:28
  answer. So this will decide who's the
• 35:31
  smartest of the two. We have red, yellow and green.
• 35:35
  We have red, white and blue. Blue-green and yellow, red,
• 35:41
  yellow and blue. It's red, white and blue
• 35:49
  USAUSAU. SAUSAUSAI was going to say the
• 35:55
  same thing. No, it's it's most definitely
• 36:00
  red blue. You can't change your answer
• 36:02
  now. No, it's USA because we beat
• 36:06
  Canada with the hat trick. We we won the sled.
• 36:10
  I'm putting you down for red, red, white and blue.
• 36:14
  No, him. That's his answer.
• 36:16
  He can eat a Dick. My answer.
• 36:18
  Is also red, white and blue. You guys are ridiculous.
• 36:23
  You heard it here first, boys and girls.
• 36:25
  It's I I said the right answer. Every other color combination.
• 36:29
  Every other combination is a secondary.
• 36:35
  Pick it. Pick red, white and blue.
• 36:39
  Yeah, that's what I thought. We are wrong, or should I say
• 36:45
  we're just off right? Oh my God.
• 36:50
  Holy shit this no laughing is fucking me up.
• 36:53
  So the the other one, the more real 1 is cyan, magenta, yellow.
• 37:01
  That's the one I use for color grading.
• 37:08
  You would know what those colors were.
• 37:14
  Next question, what was the first hit song by Britney
• 37:19
  Spears? Toxic Crazy Baby One More Time
• 37:25
  or Oops I Did It Again. First hit song by Britney
• 37:31
  Spears. Toxic Crazy baby One More Time
• 37:39
  or Oops, I did it Again. I feel like oops, I did it
• 37:43
  again. I am also saying oops, I did it
• 37:48
  again. I wrote it down wrong, but I
• 37:52
  think it's baby one more time. She wrote down OPS.
• 38:01
  Amber is correct, it is baby. One more time I.
• 38:06
  Don't. Know I don't listen to bad
• 38:10
  music. You hold your tongue.
• 38:17
  Britney's delicious. Gross.
• 38:19
  Next question What is a group of lions called?
• 38:24
  A school a Group A pride, or a family a pride.
• 38:31
  Slay Queen Pride. I'm also going to say pride.
• 38:37
  I did not get the joke. That's very good.
• 38:40
  Was it right? It is called a pride.
• 38:45
  Watch them get it wrong if. You got that wrong.
• 38:48
  Yeah. If you got that wrong at home,
• 38:49
  you're definitely on the right podcast.
• 38:57
  Next question, in which country is Zurich located?
• 39:03
  Germany. You have Switzerland, Germany,
• 39:07
  America and Mexico. Watch it be like all of the
• 39:12
  above, there's a Zurich in every country.
• 39:14
  There's a Zurich, Exactly. No, it's Germany.
• 39:21
  I genuinely didn't know I'm going to go with Germany as
• 39:26
  well. We're all wrong.
• 39:30
  I thought it was Switzerland. We're all idiots.
• 39:33
  It's Zurich in Switzerland, what are we?
• 39:38
  Oh my God, son of a bitch. The next question How many bones
• 39:48
  do sharks have? 5716?
• 39:53
  One or none? I'm fucked because none of these
• 39:57
  answers are what I thought. I assumed 200 or something.
• 40:04
  That's way too little bones. I feel like non.
• 40:08
  What do you? What the fuck do you?
• 40:10
  What are you talking? Oh my God.
• 40:13
  Pretty sure. Oh my God.
• 40:15
  I'll tell you after. Even.
• 40:17
  After the answers said. Even squids have bones.
• 40:22
  They have teeth. Teeth or bones.
• 40:23
  They have like 57 rows of teeth or some bullshit.
• 40:29
  I'm going to say one what? The fuck?
• 40:33
  Oh no, the bone is one. OK I'm going to go with one
• 40:37
  because 1 teeth are all one. No, all bones are bones.
• 40:43
  It's all connected. To one bone.
• 40:48
  We're so dumb. I say 1.
• 40:50
  What did you say? None.
• 40:52
  None. He went with none I've got.
• 40:54
  I'm going to go with one as well.
• 40:55
  OK why the fuck I thought 200 before I read this question?
• 41:01
  It's none. What the fuck are you talking
• 41:03
  about? They have no bones.
• 41:05
  It's cartilage. It's not bones, it's cartilage.
• 41:07
  It's the same thing with squids. That's not a bone, that's
• 41:10
  cartilage. Thank you very much for my Ted
• 41:13
  Talk. It's I'm so confused I'm.
• 41:18
  Going to look it up. How do they have no bones?
• 41:21
  Do they not have rib cages and shit?
• 41:23
  Cartilage. Like what's in your nose?
• 41:27
  So confused. That's so dumb.
• 41:33
  It's a lot lighter than bones. OK, you're lighter than bones.
• 41:39
  I don't I don't stamp. That don't you dare pay.
• 41:43
  Laugh me, I'll be madder than Amber.
• 41:52
  Has it set in yet what we did or no?
• 42:01
  She's actively reading about sharks with no bones.
• 42:07
  Hey, guys. Hey, hey, Ryan.
• 42:11
  Hey, guess what? Giving us the bird next
• 42:15
  question. That one.
• 42:19
  What is the fear of spiders known as acrophobia,
• 42:24
  Agoraphobia. Arachnophobia.
• 42:28
  Claustrophobia. Arachnophobia.
• 42:33
  We all got that one. Claustrophobia is when you're
• 42:37
  afraid of Santa Claus. That's.
• 42:40
  When you're afraid of closets, no.
• 42:43
  That's being gay. That's good.
• 42:48
  That's so good. Crazy.
• 42:49
  That's so crazy. Next question, How many hearts
• 42:58
  does an octopus have? One 2-3 or four. 3.
• 43:12
  What'd you say? What'd you say 3?
• 43:15
  I said 4. Amber says 4.
• 43:17
  Amber's correct? Yeah, sorry, incorrect.
• 43:22
  I can't I I just said I can't read.
• 43:24
  OK. Dumbass.
• 43:26
  I just found out I couldn't read.
• 43:29
  Oh fuck. I just found out I couldn't
• 43:32
  read. OK, all right, that's so funny.
• 43:38
  Do you know I used to dread reading in class because it
• 43:42
  fucked me up so bad? I'm going to fight you.
• 43:49
  We're both going to fight you. We'll.
• 43:51
  Fight both of you last. Question Ryan and I, this one
• 43:55
  we've got by the freaking yeah. When did the Cold War end?
• 44:01
  Never. 2017 6319891988 It's very good.
• 44:13
  I'm going to go with the second one.
• 44:14
  That's so fucking funny. Come on.
• 44:17
  It's. So funny.
• 44:19
  Oh my God, not 89. Was that the Spanish War?
• 44:24
  I don't know. Oh, I thought you said the
• 44:26
  second one. No sarcasm.
• 44:29
  Oh, he said it. You did say it.
• 44:32
  So I'm writing it down. 1989. What did you say, 89?
• 44:40
  OK. I don't know, but I know it was
• 44:43
  Reagan. You're not Clinton.
• 44:46
  And Clinton was 2000. No.
• 44:49
  Yes. Yeah, Clinton was 2000.
• 44:52
  Because then it was Bush, and then Bush again Clinton.
• 44:56
  Was not 2000. Wasn't he?
• 45:00
  Clinton was the president in 2000.
• 45:03
  The election in the year 2000 was Bush.
• 45:10
  When he passed it off to Bush cause Bush did a year.
• 45:12
  The election was in the year 2000, but in the year 2000,
• 45:19
  Clinton was. Clinton was the president, Yes.
• 45:22
  Gotcha, that's how I know to differentiate between the ones.
• 45:25
  I thought 2000 I'm like. So I know it was Reagan.
• 45:28
  So it's 89 or 88. Genuinely, if you hadn't said an
• 45:33
  answer yet, I don't know which one I would have picked.
• 45:35
  I'm going with 89, correct? USAUSA.
• 45:46
  Nice. According to BuzzFeed, we are
• 45:52
  picture of SpongeBob in glasses. 6 out of 10 smart.
• 45:59
  You both got 5 right? I got 6 right.
• 46:04
  It said you're kind of smart. Sure, you don't know everything,
• 46:06
  but you answered plenty of the questions correctly on the quiz.
• 46:09
  And that's with six, correct? So I'm smart.
• 46:12
  You both are dumb. And you can count the checkmarks
• 46:17
  too. How would we rate this quiz?
• 46:20
  Lol win Oh my. God.
• 46:23
  Cute fail or OMG. Throw it in the trash.
• 46:29
  I'm going to throw my router in the trash is what I'm going to.
• 46:32
  Do fails. Such a bad quiz.
• 46:37
  I hate BuzzFeed so. Much the article agreed the
• 46:41
  article underneath the ranking of that quiz.
• 46:45
  These 30 products are trending on Amazon, and they're totally
• 46:48
  worth the hype. The picture is a stick of
• 46:52
  butter. I swear to God, throw your
• 46:57
  routers in the trash. Gross.
• 47:01
  All right, Well, since that was so that was my.
• 47:05
  I got a real. Fast story for you before we
• 47:09
  move on to your regularly scheduled.
• 47:14
  Right. Segments.
• 47:15
  I posted it in the reacts links I think.
• 47:20
  Let me double check and make sure.
• 47:22
  Nope. Episode Media Episode 30 This is
• 47:30
  a Reddit story. I just told you I can't.
• 47:33
  I just told you I can't read. I will be reading it to you.
• 47:36
  OK for the listeners at home. OK, the username is deleted,
• 47:43
  which is, you know, starting off strong with this one.
• 47:47
  Oh, it's so long. It's not that long.
• 47:51
  My friend is in forensics and works on crime scenes.
• 47:55
  They find a woman laying on the black bathroom floor with a head
• 47:58
  wound and live baby shrimp on the floor with a smell of burnt
• 48:02
  residue. After three days of
• 48:04
  investigation, they figured out what happened.
• 48:08
  Long story short, she bought a lobster from the market.
• 48:12
  In the market, they feed the lobster live baby shrimp until
• 48:16
  they're sold. This woman brings the lobster
• 48:19
  home and inserts the lobster's tail into her vagina, lights a
• 48:24
  lighter and puts the flame towards the lobster's head so
• 48:28
  the lobster will frantically start shaking his tail, which is
• 48:31
  inside of her, giving her the jollies.
• 48:37
  Apparently she killed the lobster from burning his head
• 48:41
  too long. The lobster being dead voided
• 48:44
  his bowels, causing this lobster to shit live baby shrimp into
• 48:50
  her. This woman then goes to pee and
• 48:54
  sees live baby shrimp crawling out of her.
• 48:57
  She freaks out, falls, cracks her head open on the bathroom or
• 49:01
  bathtub, and dies. This happened in Chicago in
• 49:05
  2001. Get the get entirely the fuck
• 49:10
  out of here. What have you put in front of
• 49:14
  me? 2001 was a bad year.
• 49:23
  We got Bush and this fucking a disgusting and I hated it.
• 49:31
  Thanks, hated it. You're welcome.
• 49:36
  So my recurring segment podcast Porn comment of the week, if I
• 49:43
  can find out where I put it, that's the comment.
• 49:51
  I find out where I put it. I also found they sell pimento
• 49:59
  rope hats for the masters and I need it now.
• 50:03
  Where the I don't know where I put it.
• 50:05
  See This is why I have notes. I don't know where I put it.
• 50:14
  Oh, that's right. I don't have one, sorry.
• 50:21
  OK, I remember now I have AI have a thing.
• 50:25
  So this week. Time stamp.
• 50:29
  That time stamp, that time cut all that out.
• 50:32
  Jesus Christ, I figured out. I figured out what happened.
• 50:39
  There was a video that went around.
• 50:42
  This is very sad of the FWC pulling manatees out of the
• 50:46
  water. These manatees are dead.
• 50:49
  FW CS Florida wildlife, I'm assuming control little green
• 50:53
  jeans. And I watched the video and I
• 50:56
  was very sad. And then somebody put reposted
• 50:59
  and said, hey, FWC tell the truth.
• 51:01
  What really happened? You know, it's it's a thing
• 51:03
  where they released a bunch of nitrates or chemicals or sewage
• 51:07
  into the water and it killed 11 manatees.
• 51:09
  Tell the truth, the comments under that did.
• 51:12
  You say manatees this whole entire time.
• 51:14
  I did. Did I?
• 51:16
  I thought I did. I thought you said Stingrays.
• 51:18
  No, I thought I said manatees. You definitely said manatees.
• 51:22
  I was thinking Stingrays anyways.
• 51:26
  So I was like, wow, that's really sad.
• 51:28
  I wonder what the story is. Did they really dump a bunch of
• 51:31
  chemicals in the water and kill a bunch of manatees?
• 51:33
  So I look at the comments. The comments are completely our
• 51:37
  podcast listeners and I'm going to explain to you why I'm going
• 51:41
  to read these comments and it is insane.
• 51:44
  This is a video of a crane pulling manatees, dead manatees
• 51:48
  out of the water. Somebody stitching it saying
• 51:50
  tell the truth, FWC. What did you really do?
• 51:53
  The comments, the first comment, it says the judge at your trial,
• 51:59
  it's a picture of Caleb Hammer and he says you've been Mick
• 52:02
  gangbanged. The next comment it's their
• 52:09
  fault for being delicious. The next comment, ain't manatees
• 52:15
  endangered? The next one is the little ones
• 52:20
  taste like veal. The next one we was taking him
• 52:27
  for a ride. The next one I love so much.
• 52:36
  Catch me if you can, Game Boy. Next one is good thing he didn't
• 52:45
  find the bald eagle drumsticks. The next is pulled pork of the
• 52:57
  sea. What the fuck?
• 53:04
  These are my last ones and they're.
• 53:05
  Oh no, I got, I got one more page.
• 53:07
  Holy shit. I got two more pages.
• 53:08
  I'm not going to read all that. Oh my God.
• 53:11
  I screenshot 7 pages, dude, it goes like this forever.
• 53:16
  OK, I'm going to read a couple more.
• 53:17
  The next one is it's medical. The next one is it's my
• 53:27
  emotional support Manatee Gunny on.
• 53:30
  My own. Stop.
• 53:44
  It I was doing, I was clearing the dead air.
• 53:52
  The last one is hate to play it, not the game pimp.
• 53:56
  So dumb. Oh, oh, oh, I need you guys to
• 53:59
  look something up really fast. No.
• 54:05
  What's that? Pull up Google and type in DI
• 54:12
  K-D IKS. Are you telling me to look up
• 54:20
  Dick Dicks? That's not how you say it.
• 54:24
  The baby antelope. That's not how you say it.
• 54:27
  Look how it's pronounced. How do you How do you pronounce
• 54:31
  Dick Dicks? It's pronounced xylophone.
• 54:36
  So fucking stupid. So stupid.
• 54:41
  Jesus Christ. The little antelope.
• 54:53
  So dumb. This is like that one.
• 54:56
  I don't even remember what the word was that I told you to look
• 55:00
  up. Look up the definition for.
• 55:05
  Oh, I've got 1. So there was a, there was a
• 55:13
  thing going around where I don't know how actual this test is.
• 55:19
  Don't come for me, I'm just telling you what I read on
• 55:20
  Twitter. OK?
• 55:22
  Apparently straight men's physiological stress response to
• 55:28
  seeing two men kissing is the same as seeing maggots, right?
• 55:33
  You heard what I just said. Straight men have the same
• 55:36
  response in their brain when they see two men kissing as they
• 55:40
  do seeing maggots. Again, don't know if that's
• 55:42
  true. That's just what the article
• 55:43
  says. Right?
• 55:45
  There was another podcast where the clip I saw said who the fuck
• 55:51
  gets a boner from seeing maggots?
• 55:53
  Oh my. God, that's so good.
• 56:00
  I love it, the one. Percent.
• 56:03
  The 1%, that's right. All right, like.
• 56:10
  The 1%? Yes, I agree.
• 56:12
  Eat the rich. Yeah, I've got 2 short ones for
• 56:16
  my Oh my God I can't. I clearly I can't read.
• 56:22
  Obviously Philosophical question of the week is the liar's
• 56:30
  paradox. If I say this sentence is a lie,
• 56:37
  am I telling the truth or lying? Nope.
• 56:42
  You're going to be beaten. Nope.
• 56:44
  You're going to be beaten like you did when you were young for
• 56:51
  not being able to write correctly.
• 56:53
  That's what's going to happen. If if I say this sentence is a
• 56:59
  lie, am I telling the truth or lying?
• 57:01
  I don't know. You should ask yourself that
• 57:03
  question. Am I lying or am I telling the
• 57:05
  truth? You tell me.
• 57:08
  Because this whole entire thing in the beginning.
• 57:11
  You can't be mad at this voice. Come on.
• 57:13
  Oh, I sure can. Just listen to the.
• 57:18
  Ground What's your next fucking question?
• 57:21
  Do I have an answer? Yeah, you're, you're clearly
• 57:23
  lying because you, you are Justin saying any words.
• 57:37
  OK, two more. Thank you, Ryan.
• 57:44
  She's back, baby. She's back, baby.
• 57:47
  I'm I'm back for Ryan. You can go fuck yourself.
• 57:51
  It was his idea. It was his idea.
• 57:54
  It was my idea to do that's. Why?
• 57:55
  I said I needed to hear. It was my idea to do the the
• 57:59
  references in the show. Justin had already spammed your
• 58:03
  YouTube. That's what I'm mad about.
• 58:07
  That was. Pretty good.
• 58:09
  No, that's what I'm mad. I thought that was enough.
• 58:13
  I don't give a fuck, you guys making fun of it my.
• 58:16
  Thing is. My thing is, I'm pissed.
• 58:18
  One, I didn't even fucking catch on to it because I don't give a
• 58:22
  fuck about that show. I'm mad because I've asked you a
• 58:26
  billion fucking times in the last two weeks if you did that
• 58:31
  and you told me no. So you're a fucking liar.
• 58:33
  They wouldn't let me tell you. Am I married to him?
• 58:37
  Are you married? She actually in in real life.
• 58:41
  Mouth gape went. She almost hit me.
• 58:47
  I'm crying and this is so good. Oh my God, did he have a gun to
• 58:54
  your head? I don't think so.
• 58:57
  Is he giving you pussy? I don't think so.
• 59:00
  I can't even give pussy myself come.
• 59:02
  On. I saw another comment on a clip
• 59:08
  the other day. I love how.
• 59:09
  You didn't answer my questions. And it was somebody speaking for
• 59:16
  the porn star in the clip and they were saying like, whenever
• 59:21
  they cry in the shoot, are they confused why they're coming from
• 59:24
  their eyes? I'll just leave that with you.
• 59:31
  It's very good. It's.
• 59:32
  Fantastic. Two more.
• 59:35
  I'm done with this podcast. I'm done with you.
• 59:38
  You'll never hear from me again. Is a hot dog a Taco?
• 59:43
  No, it's a hot dog. No, but it is a sandwich.
• 59:50
  It's an A harsh sandwich. What color is a mirror?
• 59:56
  Silver. Me.
• 1:00:00
  Is it? Yeah, look up, look up what they
• 1:00:04
  use to coat the back of mirrors. It's Mercury.
• 1:00:11
  Silver. It's xylophone.
• 1:00:16
  It's xylophone. It's very good.
• 1:00:17
  Fantastic. I'm not even going to put it in
• 1:00:21
  the show notes. I'm just going to show you so
• 1:00:23
  you can see what I'm looking at. Look at this hat.
• 1:00:27
  Yeah, you sent that to me. Oh my God, look at it.
• 1:00:33
  It's so good. It's the color of pimento cheese
• 1:00:36
  and it's a master's hat. Look at that fucking thing.
• 1:00:38
  I think I said I wanted it. You did.
• 1:00:42
  Yeah, I said, Oh yeah, that's dope.
• 1:00:50
  So I was so out of it, I walked into a Sam's Club without
• 1:00:53
  knowing I was there. OK, that's my that's my
• 1:01:00
  segments. That's my bit.
• 1:01:01
  My last one is we have two sponsors for the podcast this
• 1:01:06
  week. 1 is Belgian White Marketing.
• 1:01:17
  It's the company I'm going to start.
• 1:01:21
  I'm just going to start marketing for oil and gas.
• 1:01:29
  I've been thinking about it for a week.
• 1:01:31
  Dude, I want to. I want to get into oil and gas
• 1:01:33
  so fucking bad. Pause.
• 1:01:38
  We are going to pause and cut that part out.
• 1:01:51
  Oh my God. Time stamp that came flying in
• 1:01:54
  here. Time stamped.
• 1:01:58
  Which little bitch is it? West, he's freaking out.
• 1:02:07
  He's like, who's that baby? Oh my goodness, who's that baby?
• 1:02:22
  And we're back. Time stamp that, time stamp
• 1:02:27
  that. So I want to start a marketing
• 1:02:32
  company where I go to shows for oil and gas.
• 1:02:39
  And I'm talking about like smaller vendors, not Exxon and
• 1:02:43
  BP Fucking fuck them. I want to do small home shops,
• 1:02:49
  you know, couple million, couple 100 million a year or something
• 1:02:52
  like that. And I want to do, hey, you don't
• 1:02:55
  have anybody present at these trade shows.
• 1:02:59
  Let me run your trade show booth for you and I'll take, you know,
• 1:03:06
  whatever. If I can get part of the
• 1:03:08
  contract that you get from that trade show, great.
• 1:03:10
  If not, I'll take the money for just running the trade show for,
• 1:03:13
  you know, the weekend. And apparently there's like 4
• 1:03:16
  big ones a year where some of these marketing companies are
• 1:03:21
  getting paid like 250 grand for running a booth for an old
• 1:03:25
  company. And that I just like what are
• 1:03:28
  you talking about? I'm getting paid, I mean above
• 1:03:33
  minimum wage but not far to stand in a booth and lead
• 1:03:37
  generate for a billion dollar company when I could run my own
• 1:03:40
  marketing company and not actually like be a marketer for
• 1:03:44
  that company. I can just run my own company to
• 1:03:48
  run a booth space. I thought that was pretty cool.
• 1:03:50
  Our second sponsor is Pleiades Apothecary.
• 1:03:55
  That's that's my candle company. They're all handmade by Amber.
• 1:04:00
  Check us out on all the socials. I'll figure out what to do with
• 1:04:03
  the media marketing company later, but I wanted to throw
• 1:04:06
  those in there. We're going to start throwing
• 1:04:07
  them in there every episode or in little segments that we can.
• 1:04:12
  We can do. Time jump skip through.
• 1:04:14
  We can do a special like ad read for you guys going forward, so
• 1:04:22
  we'll have you record. Something yeah I fucking hate ad
• 1:04:24
  reads well. Still though, like when I'm part
• 1:04:27
  of the podcast. Like when I listen to a podcast
• 1:04:31
  and they do an ad read, I'm like stop it.
• 1:04:33
  That's why I listen to this podcast because you guys are
• 1:04:35
  down to earth. You don't do a fucking ad read.
• 1:04:38
  I paid for no ads. Don't you dare put an ad in the
• 1:04:41
  middle of this podcast like. Unhinged.
• 1:04:45
  Yeah, that's my that's my rant for the week.
• 1:04:47
  Don't fucking put an ad in a when I paid for no ads anyway.
• 1:04:51
  So. I wanted to throw that in there
• 1:04:53
  as my very last thing your. Dog is going fucking nuts by
• 1:04:56
  him. I hear him.
• 1:04:57
  We're going to start, we're going to start doing the two
• 1:04:59
  sponsors, maybe 3 and you guys follow us on all the socials
• 1:05:05
  because we're going to start doing reacts on Amber's personal
• 1:05:10
  TikTok and then we'll move it from Amber's personal TikTok
• 1:05:15
  over to the thanks hated it accounts, but.
• 1:05:18
  There you go. Follow us on the social.
• 1:05:20
  We'll definitely post the are you saying like do the reacts on
• 1:05:26
  TikTok or post them to? Post them, post the clips.
• 1:05:30
  We can, but we do have Facebook. We do have Instagram.
• 1:05:35
  We have whatever the hell it's called, Twitter Blue sky, I
• 1:05:41
  think that's it. And that's for the podcast.
• 1:05:43
  And we also have YouTube, Yeah. Yeah, so follow us on all the
• 1:05:46
  socials, please. I beg you, please.
• 1:05:49
  We're doing good. We just we need help.
• 1:05:51
  Absolutely. The final thing that I have,
• 1:05:53
  yeah, is the redneck engineering of the week.
• 1:05:59
  This is not going to be a normal segment unless I can find more
• 1:06:03
  stuff but. Like reoccurring.
• 1:06:06
  Yeah, I don't think this is going to be a reoccurring one
• 1:06:08
  unless I find more stuff and if I do then I I will definitely do
• 1:06:13
  this. But this is what this is how we
• 1:06:15
  turned a 2 foot level into an 8 foot level.
• 1:06:20
  I posted the picture in episode. Oh, I saw that we took painters.
• 1:06:24
  I saw that. And taped it to A to a board.
• 1:06:30
  It's an 8 foot board. Couldn't even finish it.
• 1:06:34
  That's good. It's the best thing ever.
• 1:06:36
  We started calling it the Super level by the end of the day.
• 1:06:40
  Ended up. As you should.
• 1:06:43
  Yeah, ended up with two less boards of what we were like
• 1:06:48
  putting up. So we had to cut that down by 4
• 1:06:52
  foot. So it became a four foot level.
• 1:06:54
  So we made a 2 foot level, an 8 foot level and a four foot level
• 1:06:59
  and I made the joke about cutting off another foot of that
• 1:07:01
  so it could be a three foot level so we could just keep
• 1:07:04
  making different size levels. It's pretty good, but.
• 1:07:08
  It fucking worked. It's fantastic.
• 1:07:11
  It worked. I thought of I thought of the
• 1:07:13
  name the BBL or the big black level.
• 1:07:18
  That's good. That's fantastic.
• 1:07:22
  Or BWLB, big white level, whatever.
• 1:07:26
  I thought it was pretty good. Big wooden level.
• 1:07:31
  No, he sent that picture to me and I was at a show and I was
• 1:07:33
  like, what the fuck am I looking at?
• 1:07:34
  And then I just started working again.
• 1:07:36
  I was like what the fuck? That was that was what I was
• 1:07:41
  you. Sent me a you sent me a picture
• 1:07:45
  of a stepladder and a level that you taped to a board.
• 1:07:47
  And I was like, are you in construction now?
• 1:07:49
  I thought you were doing Uber. Like what's happening?
• 1:07:54
  Oh yeah, it was a good day. I'm going to go back and help
• 1:07:58
  Max on Sunday again too, so that should be fun.
• 1:08:05
  I say I'm I'm coming back down to Florida all.
• 1:08:08
  Right. I don't know when, but in the
• 1:08:11
  next week or two I'm coming back down.
• 1:08:14
  I got to change the batteries on the boat and they weigh 120 a
• 1:08:17
  piece so that's going to suck. Ryan, do you want to help?
• 1:08:22
  Not really. Yeah, Do you want to help?
• 1:08:25
  Oh, you said. You said in two weeks.
• 1:08:35
  You said one to two weeks. I'm busy one to three weeks just
• 1:08:40
  in case. There's a little event going on
• 1:08:49
  here. Let's see when.
• 1:08:51
  When exactly is it? Oh come on, show me the date.
• 1:08:59
  I hate when it doesn't say the date on it.
• 1:09:04
  This is the website, it doesn't say the date on it.
• 1:09:06
  Are you kidding me? Oh gosh.
• 1:09:16
  It tells you where it is, but it doesn't tell you when it is.
• 1:09:19
  What the fuck? OK.
• 1:09:23
  Where is it? It's in Sanford.
• 1:09:26
  And what kind of event? Craft beer festival that
• 1:09:30
  supports. So you're going to take a non
• 1:09:33
  alcohol, you're going to take a. Fucking addict to a craft beer
• 1:09:37
  festival. When you hear what the event is,
• 1:09:41
  you'll know why it's called Pints and Paws.
• 1:09:45
  It's a craft beer festival. Oh, I did that one.
• 1:09:47
  On the 28th that will be supporting the local dog
• 1:09:53
  rescues. I've done that one.
• 1:09:58
  Yeah, we've we've done that event.
• 1:10:00
  I love that one, honestly. We set a, a water bowl next to
• 1:10:04
  the tent when we're doing our pitching and like 400 dogs stop
• 1:10:10
  at the tent and you just sit there and play with them all
• 1:10:11
  day. I love.
• 1:10:12
  It the the one that we went to was in Lake Eola and I helped
• 1:10:17
  out. This was when I was a manager
• 1:10:20
  before my foot injury, but we went to Lake Eola.
• 1:10:24
  Apparently the manager that ran Orlando, she put someone without
• 1:10:29
  realizing that she is absolutely fucking terrified of dogs.
• 1:10:37
  And I don't know if it was like pints, pints for paws, but it
• 1:10:41
  was a dog show specifically where people brought all
• 1:10:46
  different sizes of these animals.
• 1:10:48
  And when I showed up, she's literally sitting in the back of
• 1:10:52
  her tent shaking like freaking out.
• 1:10:56
  And I was like, girl, I got you. I I.
• 1:10:59
  Christ's sake. Literally just like played with
• 1:11:02
  all the dogs, not even going to lie.
• 1:11:03
  But I got 13 leads. I think that day, 11 or 13, I
• 1:11:07
  definitely could have got more. But I was so into those fucking.
• 1:11:10
  Dogs. I was like, Oh my God, I'll be
• 1:11:12
  going there was like. Two of them, two of them were in
• 1:11:16
  one of those like remote control cars, but it was like a big
• 1:11:20
  size, like a Jeep. It was really cute.
• 1:11:24
  Yeah. So I'll be going.
• 1:11:25
  Yeah, I'm down. Whoop, whoop.
• 1:11:29
  Can I go? Yeah, absolutely.
• 1:11:32
  You both kind of owe it to me, so fuck off.
• 1:11:37
  I never say you're going to be able to go to a craft beer show
• 1:11:40
  and not drink. No, I'm going to drink.
• 1:11:45
  Amber, I got wine for you. Am I going to get wasted?
• 1:11:48
  No. I love wine.
• 1:11:54
  Yeah, I'd like to go. I'd like to go see the dogs
• 1:11:58
  while I'm down there. I'll be in the land so I'm right
• 1:12:01
  up the road. Yeah.
• 1:12:04
  All right. But we'll figure it all out off
• 1:12:06
  cast. Thank you guys for listening.
• 1:12:10
  I hope you enjoyed the episode. We had a blast making it and we
• 1:12:14
  had an even bigger blast making it over the last week.
• 1:12:18
  I'm excited to hear that episode.
• 1:12:20
  Are there as many Dings as I think there are?
• 1:12:23
  There's 46. At the end where I'm just
• 1:12:28
  listing stuff off, does it just Ding Ding awesome?
• 1:12:31
  Is that what you guys were talking about?
• 1:12:32
  E-mail. Yes.
• 1:12:34
  It made no sense. It made no point of sense.
• 1:12:38
  And you guys were gaslighting me too.
• 1:12:40
  How does this not make sense? I'm like, where did these come
• 1:12:44
  from? You like, you know, you love
• 1:12:46
  pretzels and avocados. Go eat a Dick.
• 1:12:49
  No, I'm mad at you. That came off the top of my head
• 1:12:51
  when you said ChatGPT gave me emails about her life right off
• 1:12:56
  the top of my. Head I was, I was struggling to
• 1:12:59
  to keep it together. On the rails, I agree.
• 1:13:05
  It was so good. Hated it.
• 1:13:08
  Bye keep bye. Hated it.
• 1:13:10
  Fuck you guys bye. Hated it.