Latest / The Radio From Hell Show - Best Of / Bill's Eye Doc Story From December 8th, 2025

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Bill's Eye Doc Story From December 8th, 2025 · The Radio From Hell Show - Best Of

• 0:00
  Speaker 1: Friday, I went to the eye doctor and get a
• 0:05
  Speaker 1: shot in my eye, which I do once a month. Yes.
• 0:09
  Speaker 1: They takes an old syringe or a little needle and
• 0:12
  Speaker 1: pokes my eye with it. And so I'm there waiting
• 0:16
  Speaker 1: to get my shot, and I'm looking at my phone
• 0:18
  Speaker 1: and a man and an older man and a woman
• 0:22
  Speaker 1: come and sit down next to me. And the guy
• 0:24
  Speaker 1: was quite old, he was bent over. He has a cane,
• 0:28
  Speaker 1: and they were talking. He says, no, I don't need
• 0:30
  Speaker 1: my oxygen right now. No, I'm fine, I don't need
• 0:32
  Speaker 1: it right now. Besides that portable oxygen think I don't
• 0:35
  Speaker 1: like that anyway enough. And then he went into the
• 0:38
  Speaker 1: got his eyes checked, and he came back out to
• 0:40
  Speaker 1: wait for the second part of these And as he
• 0:43
  Speaker 1: came back out, he walked up to this so there
• 0:46
  Speaker 1: are a whole line of people sitting there, and there
• 0:48
  Speaker 1: was a group of three or four women. And he
• 0:50
  Speaker 1: walked up to those women and he said, I've got
• 0:54
  Speaker 1: something I want to tell you now, Donor. I'm not
• 0:58
  Speaker 1: a dirty old man, but I have a story. I
• 1:00
  Speaker 1: have a story I want to tell you. Hey, uh,
• 1:03
  Speaker 1: and they and there all right. You know, it was
• 1:06
  Speaker 1: just kind of odd. He's got her with his cane.
• 1:08
  Speaker 1: He said, Well, here's the story. It's about potatoes. A
• 1:12
  Speaker 1: girl potato and a boy potato had eyes for each other,
• 1:17
  Speaker 1: and finally they got married and they had a little
• 1:20
  Speaker 1: sweet potato, which they called Yam. Now, of course they
• 1:24
  Speaker 1: wanted the best for Yam, and when it was time,
• 1:27
  Speaker 1: they told her about the facts of life. Don't worry,
• 1:31
  Speaker 1: don't no, don't worry, don't worry, and he said, don't worry,
• 1:33
  Speaker 1: don't worry. They warned her about going out and getting
• 1:37
  Speaker 1: half baked, so she wouldn't get accidentally mashed and get
• 1:42
  Speaker 1: a bad name for herself as a hot potato and
• 1:46
  Speaker 1: end up with a bunch of little tater tots. Now,
• 1:49
  Speaker 1: Yam said, don't worry, No sput is going to get
• 1:52
  Speaker 1: me into the sack and make a rotten potato out
• 1:54
  Speaker 1: of me. But the other on the other hand, she
• 1:57
  Speaker 1: wouldn't stay home and become a couch potato either. She
• 2:01
  Speaker 1: would get plenty of exercise so it as not to
• 2:03
  Speaker 1: be skinny like her shoestring cousins. When she went off
• 2:07
  Speaker 1: to Europe, Mister and missus Potato told Yam to watch
• 2:10
  Speaker 1: out for the hard boiled guys from Ireland and those
• 2:13
  Speaker 1: greasy guys from France called and then he paused like that,
• 2:18
  Speaker 1: and everybody just sat there and I went French Fries. Yes.
• 2:24
  Speaker 1: And then when she went out west to watch for
• 2:27
  Speaker 1: the watch for the Indians so you won't get scalloped,
• 2:32
  Speaker 1: Yam said she would stay on the straight and narrow
• 2:34
  Speaker 1: and wouldn't associate with those high class Yukon goals. Mister
• 2:38
  Speaker 1: and Missus Potato sent Yam to p U University and
• 2:42
  Speaker 1: that's Potato University, so that when she graduated, she'd finally
• 2:46
  Speaker 1: be in the Chips. But in spite of it all,
• 2:49
  Speaker 1: one day Yam came home and announced she was going
• 2:52
  Speaker 1: to marry Tom Brokaw. Hu and everybody and then he
• 2:57
  Speaker 1: stopped again, said, you know, Tom Brokaw used to be
• 2:59
  Speaker 1: on the news. Tom Brokaw. Mister and Missus Potato were
• 3:03
  Speaker 1: very upset. They told Yam she could not possibly marry
• 3:07
  Speaker 1: Tom Brokaw because he's just a commentator. And then and
• 3:16
  Speaker 1: it was it was oddly charming. And then he handed
• 3:20
  Speaker 1: out a written copy, a type written copy to everybody
• 3:24
  Speaker 1: in the line and he said, here you get one thing.
• 3:28
  Speaker 1: His name is Spencer Greer and he was there. The
• 3:31
  Speaker 1: woman he was with is is uh you know. She
• 3:35
  Speaker 1: she's his helper to get I don't share and live
• 3:38
  Speaker 1: with him, but she takes care of him and he
• 3:41
  Speaker 1: I said, what, that was pretty amazing, And she said,
• 3:45
  Speaker 1: you should see him. He has it like he has
• 3:48
  Speaker 1: a group of people that meet twice a month and
• 3:51
  Speaker 1: it's this giant group of people. I think I think
• 3:53
  Speaker 1: it's called he calls it life in a Jar. And
• 3:56
  Speaker 1: he teaches people how to write their life stories. Cool. Yeah,
• 4:00
  Speaker 1: And and he and I just chatted with him for
• 4:03
  Speaker 1: a second. He was a really nice guy. And I said,
• 4:07
  Speaker 1: what's what's his story? She said, well, he was an
• 4:08
  Speaker 1: engineer and uh, I don't know that was his profession
• 4:13
  Speaker 1: before he retired. But now he just and she said,
• 4:16
  Speaker 1: he'll do that story wherever we go, he'll do it.
• 4:20
  Speaker 1: If there's a group of two or more people, he
• 4:22
  Speaker 1: will do that story.
• 4:23
  Speaker 2: And he has prints out.
• 4:25
  Speaker 1: Yes, he has copies that he that he prints out.
• 4:29
  Speaker 1: It was you know, it's I thought, and it's you know,
• 4:33
  Speaker 1: it's what keeps him going. You can tell.
• 4:36
  Speaker 2: I don't know how I feel about that.
• 4:38
  Speaker 1: Yeah, why what's what's what's wrong with her?
• 4:41
  Speaker 2: I don't know, I just I was expecting it to
• 4:45
  Speaker 2: be a joke. It's a big it's a commitment to
• 4:47
  Speaker 2: listen to that.
• 4:48
  Speaker 1: It's it's well and he and he and he has
• 4:51
  Speaker 1: a captive audience. He makes sure he has a captive audience.
• 4:56
  Speaker 1: And like I just did.
• 4:58
  Speaker 2: Maybe you should come up with your story that well.
• 5:01
  Speaker 1: I think this texture has put it brilliantly.
• 5:04
  Speaker 2: I love tuber based racism, tuber based race. It's okay
• 5:11
  Speaker 2: if you if you're talking about potatoes, Carris he.
• 5:14
  Speaker 1: Was, he was, Yeah, you can tell. He's just He's
• 5:18
  Speaker 1: a guy who wants to be a punter all the time. Puns, puns, puns.
• 5:23
  Speaker 1: There you go. Spencer Greer