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Jen Conkey’s Secrets to Rewiring Your Mind for Success · Go Big with Gib Podcast

• 0:00
  Speaker 1: Welcome to the Go Big With Gibb podcast, where we talk to professionals, business owners and entrepreneurs about their big wins.
• 0:06
  Speaker 1: Welcome to this episode of Go Big With Gibb.
• 0:16
  Speaker 1: Today, I've got a very special guest here with me, Jen Conkey.
• 0:19
  Speaker 1: Jen, how are you today?
• 0:21
  Speaker 2: I am doing awesome, gibb.
• 0:22
  Speaker 2: I'm excited to be here.
• 0:22
  Speaker 2: Thank you, yeah, absolutely, jen.
• 0:23
  Speaker 2: It's a today.
• 0:23
  Speaker 2: I am doing awesome, gib.
• 0:24
  Speaker 1: I'm excited to be here.
• 0:24
  Speaker 1: Thank you, yeah, absolutely, jen, it's a pleasure to have you on.
• 0:27
  Speaker 1: You know, for the listeners out there that don't know, jen does a lot of public speaking and I'm going to let Jen kind of introduce herself.
• 0:34
  Speaker 1: But she is a phenomenal public speaker and I have had the opportunity of speaking behind her now at two events and one of them was a foul.
• 0:43
  Speaker 1: There was an audience of a thousand capital raisers in Phoenix, arizona, and Jen went up there and just absolutely lit up the stage Awesome tips and tricks and share just a ton of knowledge about mindset and how to keep a positive mindset.
• 0:59
  Speaker 1: And I remember thinking at that time that I wanted to have you on the podcast.
• 1:02
  Speaker 1: And then, the second time we spoke together again you lit it up and just took a room full of people that were lethargic, sitting through a multi-day conference and still really good people and interesting content.
• 1:13
  Speaker 1: But you got on the stage and just absolutely lit everybody up and I just think the world of you.
• 1:19
  Speaker 1: It's a pleasure to have you on.
• 1:20
  Speaker 2: Oh, Gib, thank you.
• 1:21
  Speaker 2: That's my passion is.
• 1:22
  Speaker 2: I feel like my mission on this earth is to wake people up, shake them, inspire them and get them going again.
• 1:29
  Speaker 2: What I've always been known for is that inspiring people.
• 1:33
  Speaker 2: But I've been I've been doing stage talks for about 20 years and I just now it's it's the dopamine hit, and my favorite thing to do is go to these conferences.
• 1:42
  Speaker 2: I just came from one that was on the West Coast for business, business owners and a lot of business owners.
• 1:49
  Speaker 2: I know what it's like.
• 1:49
  Speaker 2: You know I've created four multi-million businesses myself and I know that there's a grind feeling to it and I like to really just show people what it takes to interrupt that pattern and really focus on why you started, associate to that and just get into a peak flow of peak performance and make just completely unstoppable identity out of yourself.
• 2:11
  Speaker 2: And I get fired up about it every time I'm in front of a crowd.
• 2:15
  Speaker 2: I'm actually going to be at Race Fest again.
• 2:16
  Speaker 2: I'm going to be speaking at Race Fest again, so hopefully we'll be together.
• 2:20
  Speaker 1: Yeah, no, fantastic, I look forward to that.
• 2:23
  Speaker 1: And so Jen, give us a little bit I became known for was turning around the businesses.
• 2:47
  Speaker 2: So I would be given a building go in there, identify what was broken, look at the P&L, figure out what tactics and strategies they were using and what really moved the mercury on those line items on the P&L, and then get the leadership team pumped up, focused on their mission, their values and their vision and then get realigned, basically planning a 90-day increment, so that they can continue to improve performance.
• 3:11
  Speaker 2: I did that for about 20 years while doing real estate on the side and then in 2015, realized, oh, this is now an option for me to go to that nine to five and you know what?
• 3:23
  Speaker 2: I'd rather go do other things and double down on real estate and really take my mindset business to the next level and my speaking business.
• 3:31
  Speaker 2: I want to start that so that I could reach more people.
• 3:33
  Speaker 2: So in 2015, I retired from corporate America and I doubled down on real estate and for the past ten years almost about nine and a half years now I've just been going for it and I've been getting on more stages, getting in front of more business owners and helping them, and I've I've really increased my reach, my revenue, my impact, most importantly, and I just I love doing it and what it.
• 3:55
  Speaker 2: What happened is it created an annual event that I do called become unshackled, where I take business owners and very successful entrepreneurs that meet in that room and they just want to take their performance to the next level and I help them rewrite the story they've been telling themselves that usually creates these glass ceilings.
• 4:14
  Speaker 2: I help them rewrite that story, create a new empowering story, and then I rewire their beliefs and probably like six minutes flat.
• 4:23
  Speaker 2: It's a very interesting process, but I'm NLP.
• 4:26
  Speaker 2: I'm a master practitioner of NLP, hypnotherapy and mental emotional release, so I know how to release those beliefs that keep us limited and because of that, once they're released, then I can create the new identity that they need to take their business to the next level.
• 4:40
  Speaker 2: And that's pretty much me in a nutshell.
• 4:42
  Speaker 1: And then what I?
• 4:43
  Speaker 2: usually do is as they add more commas to their bank account, then they invest in deals.
• 4:47
  Speaker 2: You know what that's like.
• 4:48
  Speaker 1: Sure, sure.
• 4:49
  Speaker 1: So I had to look this up.
• 4:50
  Speaker 1: Nlp is neuro-linguistic programming.
• 4:54
  Speaker 1: What does that mean in layman's terms?
• 4:58
  Speaker 2: Layman's terms, that's great.
• 4:59
  Speaker 2: So you have a conscious mind and an unconscious mind.
• 5:02
  Speaker 2: Your conscious mind, if you think about in an office building, you've got the big boss, the CEO, in the corner and he's got his assistant out in front.
• 5:10
  Speaker 2: So your conscious mind is the assistant out in front and your unconscious mind is the one in the background that basically runs everything.
• 5:16
  Speaker 2: It's like a supercomputer.
• 5:17
  Speaker 2: So your conscious mind is only going to process about 126 bits per second, whereas your unconscious mind is going at millions of bits per second.
• 5:28
  Speaker 2: But your conscious mind helps you filter out, filter, delete, distort information that's not important to you in that moment.
• 5:35
  Speaker 2: While the unconscious mind is thinking fight, filter, delete, distort information that's not important to you in that moment.
• 5:36
  Speaker 2: While the unconscious mind is thinking fight, flight, freeze, and it's got a reptilian effect to it because it, you know, you're growing toenails and fingernails right now, without doing anything consciously.
• 5:48
  Speaker 2: Your, your super, your super brain, super, computer's doing that for you, right, and you're growing your hair and you don't even know it.
• 5:54
  Speaker 2: Your heart is beating, your lungs are breathing.
• 5:57
  Speaker 2: That's what your unconscious mind does.
• 5:59
  Speaker 2: So one of the things that I've done over the past 20 years is I've studied the brain and what the unconscious mind is responsible for.
• 6:05
  Speaker 2: What the conscious mind is responsible for and how to really speak to you, in a way, using NLP as neuro-linguistic programming.
• 6:14
  Speaker 2: So it's a language that you use that sounds a little weird, but what it's doing is it's bypassing that secretary conscious mind and it's kind of slipping a note under the door to the unconscious mind, to the big boss in the back, saying hey, actually we're going to do this now, and so I'm distracting you with language and your unconscious mind actually understands exactly what I'm saying, it understands the assignment and in that moment is doing a file save, as we call it Cartesian logic.
• 6:42
  Speaker 2: It's where you can your brain in order to know what not to do, it needs, or what to do it needs an example of what not to do.
• 6:50
  Speaker 2: So you've got to talk about things that are missing versus present, or present versus missing, and it just it's a scramble in your brain and when your beliefs are so instilled in you and it's in that reptilian brain, I've got to get you into a trance where both sides of the brain are kind of working together and then we're dropping in some post-hypnotic suggestions that get you to believe in yourself differently and really just wire it in.
• 7:15
  Speaker 2: But you do it through language.
• 7:16
  Speaker 2: You can do it with sound on top of that breath work.
• 7:19
  Speaker 2: I do all of those modalities to really open you up and get a new identity inside of you.
• 7:25
  Speaker 2: A lot of people want to know what NLP is.
• 7:27
  Speaker 2: It's the more positive, empowering language that can change the way you assign a meaning to things that are happening in your life.
• 7:34
  Speaker 1: So when you're working with a business owner or an entrepreneur, like you mentioned earlier that some of the some of what you do can be done in like six minutes Can you make that profound of an impact on a person in such a short period of time and how does that work, If it can even be explained?
• 7:51
  Speaker 2: Yeah, it does.
• 7:51
  Speaker 2: It feels a little bit, you know, out there a little woo, woo, if you will.
• 7:55
  Speaker 2: I'm not a fan of that word, but but still some.
• 7:58
  Speaker 2: I know that people will understand it.
• 7:59
  Speaker 2: But it's not.
• 8:00
  Speaker 2: It's.
• 8:01
  Speaker 2: It's science and the way that we speak to our unconscious mind and the way that it it doesn't hear the don't, it only hears the positive language.
• 8:08
  Speaker 2: So you have to use different language sequences and different syntax so that, as I'm speaking to your conscious mind, you're sitting there going what in the heck is Jen talking about?
• 8:26
  Speaker 2: And I'm doing it so fast that it keeps your conscious mind completely focused on the fact that Jen's asking me a lot of questions right now.
• 8:34
  Speaker 2: When I listen to those questions, the language and the order she says, it sounds crazy.
• 8:38
  Speaker 2: So your conscious mind is only thinking about that and your unconscious mind is hearing me very quickly and it's rewiring you.
• 8:44
  Speaker 2: It's doing a file save as it's aligning everything as it needs to be and I've done this before with business owners and after the process they're like I'll ask them so what was that old problem again?
• 8:53
  Speaker 2: And they're like I don't remember Right.
• 8:55
  Speaker 2: And some of them are like oh well, it was this, but it feels less.
• 8:59
  Speaker 2: Now I see that, man, that wasn't very logical.
• 9:01
  Speaker 2: I could actually do these things.
• 9:03
  Speaker 2: So it just.
• 9:04
  Speaker 2: It shifts you very quickly, and sometimes people got to drink a lot of water, take some ibuprofen and it happens the next day, where they wake up and they just feel a little different.
• 9:12
  Speaker 2: So it's not like it always happens instantly, but no matter what it happens, it's just a matter of when you process it and when you finally start seeing some key distinctions about oh, I didn't think about it that way.
• 9:24
  Speaker 2: And that's really where the change is is it shifts your vantage point, it shifts your framework on how you're approaching a problem or how you're assigning a meaning that's limiting, and then you start to see different meanings related to that problem and then, therefore, you can see different solutions.
• 9:40
  Speaker 2: So it's just those little tweaks, because sometimes it's just the questions that we're asking that lead us to look at something with the wrong meaning or an ineffective meaning.
• 9:50
  Speaker 2: When I say that, when you ask the question of why, whenever you ask somebody why, their unconscious mind is going to try to give you all the reasons why and rationalize it.
• 10:00
  Speaker 2: Well, anytime you're rationalizing something, you're not being accountable and you're not taking 100% responsibility for changing it.
• 10:07
  Speaker 2: So a why question?
• 10:09
  Speaker 2: When you ask yourself a why question, it keeps you stuck in rationalizing your behavior.
• 10:13
  Speaker 2: Instead shift to what, who or how questions.
• 10:19
  Speaker 2: So, for an example, if I thought to myself, man, why do I keep getting so sick?
• 10:23
  Speaker 2: Well, I'm going to answer all those questions.
• 10:25
  Speaker 2: Well, you were just traveling in a plane, you got on an eight-hour flight back, you did that on a red-eye and you know you're around a guy that was coughing, and then I'm not going to do anything to try and take preventive measures.
• 10:34
  Speaker 2: But if I said, and then I'm not going to do anything to try and take preventive measures, but if I said, what could I do?
• 10:38
  Speaker 2: Knowing I'm going to travel to boost my immune system, that's different.
• 10:41
  Speaker 2: Now I'm going to take different action and the way we ask questions is based on what we believe and what we believe we achieve.
• 10:48
  Speaker 2: So, if I can say, I believe that I'm going to take some zinc, I'm going to take some vitamin C, I'm going to make sure I get plenty of rest.
• 10:53
  Speaker 2: I'm going to take some zinc, I'm going to take some vitamin C, I'm going to make sure I get plenty of rest.
• 10:56
  Speaker 2: I'm going to drink a lot of fluids, especially when I'm on this plane.
• 10:59
  Speaker 2: If I need to, I need to protect myself.
• 11:02
  Speaker 2: I believe the exact opposite.
• 11:03
  Speaker 2: I don't wear face masks just because I want the germs for my antibodies to build up so that it knows that it can protect me.
• 11:09
  Speaker 2: And I tell myself all the time I'm not going to get sick.
• 11:12
  Speaker 2: So it's because I ask different questions.
• 11:17
  Speaker 2: What can I do to mitigate the symptoms of feeling sick?
• 11:19
  Speaker 2: Because I'm in this box flying 35,000 feet in the air with nowhere to go and all these germs coming at me?
• 11:25
  Speaker 2: It's literally the question you ask.
• 11:27
  Speaker 2: So that's NLP, though.
• 11:29
  Speaker 2: It's asking yourself different questions and avoid the why.
• 11:33
  Speaker 2: Definitely.
• 11:33
  Speaker 2: Don't ask your kids why.
• 11:34
  Speaker 2: They'll rationalize everything Like why did you do that?
• 11:36
  Speaker 2: They're going to tell you exactly why, and that's not what you want to hear.
• 11:39
  Speaker 2: So instead, what would have been a better choice or what was limiting about that choice and how can we do it differently next time?
• 11:47
  Speaker 2: The what, the how, the who could help you.
• 11:50
  Speaker 2: Those are the better questions than why.
• 11:52
  Speaker 2: That's NLP in a nutshell, too.
• 11:56
  Speaker 1: Yeah, I love that, you know.
• 11:57
  Speaker 1: I'm sure you've probably heard Jesse Itzler speak before.
• 12:01
  Speaker 2: I actually have not heard Jesse Itzler, so I apologize.
• 12:05
  Speaker 1: Well, no, you would love hearing him speak.
• 12:07
  Speaker 1: You know, jesse is, you know he's a business owner, an entrepreneur, and he does a lot of public speaking and one of the things he talks about is the words that we say matter.
• 12:18
  Speaker 1: And he doesn't say it from like a, it's not, you know, as scientific as what we were talking about before.
• 12:24
  Speaker 1: He just says it from like.
• 12:25
  Speaker 1: You know the words we speak matter, what you say matters, and he taught.
• 12:30
  Speaker 1: He's a guy who's you know, run like a hundred mile race and he's done a lot of things that are just extraordinary, like riding his bike across the country, stuff that other people don't do because they're like it's impossible or I can't do it.
• 12:47
  Speaker 1: And Jesse is just a.
• 12:49
  Speaker 1: He's real big on the cold plunge and the sauna and the running, and so he's just one of those guys that's cut from that cloth.
• 12:58
  Speaker 1: And he always says the words we speak matter.
• 13:01
  Speaker 1: And you know, one of the things he likes to do is ask the audience you know, how are you doing today?
• 13:06
  Speaker 1: And then everybody says outstanding.
• 13:08
  Speaker 1: And just by speaking the word, you know that I'm doing outstanding.
• 13:13
  Speaker 1: It takes you away from the negative thought.
• 13:15
  Speaker 1: Is that kind of in line with your belief system in terms of what you do to help your clients.
• 13:22
  Speaker 2: A thousand percent, because where focus goes, energy flows.
• 13:26
  Speaker 2: So if you're saying I am outstanding, your body is not only activating that and that word vibrates at a certain level, a certain residency.
• 13:35
  Speaker 2: So when you say it and then you're feeling it, you're raising your vibe just by speaking.
• 13:39
  Speaker 2: It's very powerful.
• 13:41
  Speaker 2: I absolutely agree with that.
• 13:42
  Speaker 2: And when you focus on the fact that you feel amazing, you start to notice the amazing versus.
• 13:50
  Speaker 2: So I call that, you start to notice the gain versus the gap.
• 13:54
  Speaker 2: There's a book I can't remember who the author is of that, but it's a brilliant book.
• 13:58
  Speaker 2: When we focus on the gap, and when we're not feeling so well, then we're going to continue to not feel so well, but to say I'm amazing, I'm outstanding, and even change your physiology while you're doing it.
• 14:07
  Speaker 2: If you don't actually feel outstanding and you're not feeling that great in that moment, you can just make a move and get your body and your physiology going and stand in like that superhero pose where your hands are on your hips and just start thinking about the last time you felt amazing, the last time you felt outstanding, and that feeling will start to rise inside of you and then stick with that and focus on that the rest of your day.
• 14:30
  Speaker 2: It changes everything.
• 14:31
  Speaker 1: This episode of Go Big with Gibb is brought to you by Irons Equity.
• 14:35
  Speaker 1: Everything this episode of Go Big with Gibb is brought to you by Irons Equity.
• 14:38
  Speaker 1: At Irons Equity, we specialize in helping investors like you create long-term generational wealth and save money on taxes through recession-resistant real estate investments that create passive income for you and your family.
• 14:48
  Speaker 1: If you want to secure your financial future, go to investwithgibbcom to schedule a 30-minute introductory meeting with me Gibb Irons Again, that's investwithgibbcom.
• 14:58
  Speaker 1: To schedule a 30-minute introductory meeting with me Gibb Irons Again, that's investwithgibbcom.
• 15:05
  Speaker 1: I love that.
• 15:09
  Speaker 1: I love that.
• 15:09
  Speaker 1: It's little things in life and it's different stuff for different people.
• 15:10
  Speaker 1: But my oldest child is 10 years old and she was struggling with riding her bike, and this was a couple of years ago.
• 15:16
  Speaker 1: You know she's been riding her bike for a few years now.
• 15:19
  Speaker 1: But I told her you know you have the physical ability to ride a bike, right.
• 15:25
  Speaker 1: I mean, that's not, it's not that hard.
• 15:27
  Speaker 1: You've got all the coordination and the physical strength and the only thing keeping you from riding that bike is in between your ears, it's your mind.
• 15:37
  Speaker 1: And I remember telling her you know, asking her, you know how are you doing right now?
• 15:42
  Speaker 1: And she'd go I'm outstanding.
• 15:43
  Speaker 1: And then I'd say, how are you doing, anna Gibson?
• 15:45
  Speaker 1: And she'd go outstanding.
• 15:47
  Speaker 1: And then one time, you know, she just rode her bike off and she rode like 20 or 30 yards the first time and then she did it again and and then, next thing, you know we're going around and around the neighborhood, you know riding for three miles without her falling off, and it was all mental.
• 16:05
  Speaker 1: And I think you know we learn a lot of things from watching children and the way they behave.
• 16:10
  Speaker 1: Like I'm, I'm very, I'm very Similar.
• 16:13
  Speaker 1: I'm struggling with different things.
• 16:15
  Speaker 1: My thing is not riding a bike right, but it's other things I'm struggling with in life and the only thing holding me back is my mind.
• 16:22
  Speaker 2: Yeah, you know.
• 16:23
  Speaker 2: What's interesting too, gib, is you're talking about.
• 16:26
  Speaker 2: There's a strategy to learn something new.
• 16:28
  Speaker 2: We've all implemented a strategy.
• 16:31
  Speaker 2: We all have our own specific strategy when learning something new and we all proved it because we all walk and back in the day we all didn't know how to walk, we didn't know how to hold a fork or a spoon.
• 16:42
  Speaker 2: But imagine if the world gave up when it came to learning to walk.
• 16:46
  Speaker 2: It would be a different human experience, right.
• 16:49
  Speaker 2: But the thing is, they say children are resilient, and it's true they are.
• 16:54
  Speaker 2: And the thing is there's still our inner five-year-old inside of all of us.
• 16:58
  Speaker 2: And when we think about you know what I never gave up on, you know going out there and learning how to walk.
• 17:04
  Speaker 2: If I applied the same strategy that I did when I was learning to walk and I never gave up, I wonder what else I could accomplish.
• 17:10
  Speaker 2: And a lot of people you're absolutely accurate when they're a business owner in the beginning, they've achieved a certain level of performance and they want to take it to the next level.
• 17:19
  Speaker 2: And there are a lot of inner monologue conversations where people do say, oh, that's impossible.
• 17:24
  Speaker 2: And what I like to and my kids even do it, especially learning to ride a bike or roller skate, or my son's learning how to be.
• 17:32
  Speaker 2: He just turned 13 and he's the offensive and defensive lineman for his football team and he's the best one on the team.
• 17:38
  Speaker 2: But at first he was like it's impossible for me to play football, mom.
• 17:42
  Speaker 2: I've been playing baseball my whole life and now I'm going to football.
• 17:47
  Speaker 2: But that's impossible.
• 17:48
  Speaker 2: And I told him even the word impossible says I'm possible and you need to think about I'm possible, not impossible, it's I'm possible.
• 17:57
  Speaker 2: And now he's out there.
• 17:58
  Speaker 2: He's got like nine sacks and it's his first time playing football.
• 18:01
  Speaker 2: But he's so proud of himself.
• 18:04
  Speaker 2: And I'll tell you one thing that I do with my son, that I did when he was in baseball, that I do with anybody that I'm coaching and I want to teach you guys this too is when you're learning something new.
• 18:13
  Speaker 2: In the beginning you have this unconscious incompetence, so you don't even know what you don't know about mastering this skill, and then you learn a little bit, then you go to the next level, which is like you are consciously incompetent, like you know what you don't know, and it's painful and a lot of people will give up on that phase of learning something new.
• 18:34
  Speaker 2: And what I want you to do instead is, as you're learning something new and you have those little wins like you were just talking about your daughter when she had that first win and they're feeling you're feeling so good about it, fine, like I choose my right knuckle.
• 18:48
  Speaker 2: And I did this to my son the first time he got his first baseball hit.
• 18:51
  Speaker 2: I went out and I just touched that knuckle and just held it there and just asked him man, how did it feel?
• 18:56
  Speaker 2: What did it feel like?
• 18:56
  Speaker 2: And I'm watching him feel that feeling that's building up inside of him and I'm just holding his knuckle until I see it start to peak and then I take my finger off of his knuckle.
• 19:05
  Speaker 2: And I did that every single time.
• 19:07
  Speaker 2: When he stole a base.
• 19:08
  Speaker 2: I'd be like how did it feel to steal that base?
• 19:09
  Speaker 2: And I just hold his knuckle while he's talking about it.
• 19:12
  Speaker 2: And then pretty soon you'd see my son when he was getting ready to go into the batter's box.
• 19:16
  Speaker 2: He'd be on deck and he'd be pushing his knuckle.
• 19:19
  Speaker 2: And when he pushed the knuckle, he starts to get that feeling of that identity of I am a baseball player.
• 19:25
  Speaker 2: So I do the same thing with them on football, you could do it to yourself.
• 19:29
  Speaker 2: Though that's the beauty of this is, as you're learning something new and there's that first hurdle, that first challenge.
• 19:35
  Speaker 2: When you overcome it, then you're going to feel incredible.
• 19:38
  Speaker 2: You're going to feel proud of yourself because you didn't give up.
• 19:40
  Speaker 2: You're going to feel proud of yourself because you figured out.
• 19:42
  Speaker 2: Now you have this amazing dopamine hit and man, just find a place on your body and pick up the same one for that feeling.
• 19:49
  Speaker 2: And if you want to feel unstoppable, just touch your knuckle and be like man.
• 19:52
  Speaker 2: That was amazing, I'm possible, I'm possible, I'm amazing.
• 19:59
  Speaker 2: And as it starts to peak, just let go because you want the peak feeling.
• 20:01
  Speaker 2: It's called anchoring.
• 20:02
  Speaker 2: Tony Robbins teaches it.
• 20:02
  Speaker 2: You know we're in Tony Robbins Platinum Partnership and in that network, when you go to Tony events, you don't leave without being in a peak performance, and one of the things he teaches is anchoring and I've applied that, that anchoring.
• 20:14
  Speaker 2: There's a specific way I shake hands, there's a specific way that I talk to myself and others and as I'm feeling something, you might often find me like touching a knuckle when it's a certain feeling, I got a feeling for each knuckle.
• 20:25
  Speaker 2: You know you can build yourself up and just when you need to feel like I need to take the stage.
• 20:30
  Speaker 2: I made myself a ring and I pull it off and I throw it on the ground and I step into the ring and it rises up inside of me that, oh, throw it on the ground and I step into the ring and it rises up inside of me that, oh, that's right, I'm the most influential speaker in the world.
• 20:39
  Speaker 2: And then I storm the stage and I inspire lives.
• 20:42
  Speaker 2: In order to do that and condition yourself, you have to initiate the feeling that you need when it's time to perform and the time to be ready is not the time to get ready.
• 20:55
  Speaker 2: So, as you condition yourself and you're feeling these feelings building up to it, just anchor it in and then, when it's time to be ready, you're ready.
• 21:01
  Speaker 2: You just hit that anchor, feel the feelings and go in and you've wired yourself.
• 21:05
  Speaker 2: It's a cool little biohack.
• 21:07
  Speaker 1: Yeah, that's awesome.
• 21:08
  Speaker 1: That's awesome.
• 21:08
  Speaker 1: So talk to me about limiting beliefs and how you can break through those as a business owner and an entrepreneur.
• 21:17
  Speaker 2: Absolutely so.
• 21:18
  Speaker 2: A lot of folks.
• 21:19
  Speaker 2: We have these beliefs that are instilled in us between the ages of zero through seven, and what we believe, our global beliefs, what we believe about the world, what we believe about people, humanity, what we believe about relationships, love, what you need to do in order to get money, what you need to do in order to have a successful career or business per se need to do in order to have a successful career or business per se.
• 21:41
  Speaker 2: There's all these beliefs about external things, but there's a lot of beliefs about ourselves that we believe, because of external things, that happened.
• 21:47
  Speaker 2: And what happens is you'll, throughout life, as you're growing up and you're trying to master a new skill, you'll have an event that happens, and then how you respond to that event or what meaning you assign to that event, changes everything, and that meaning comes from what you believe.
• 22:00
  Speaker 2: So let's just say I'm running a business and I'm meeting with my ads team and the ads performance is.
• 22:07
  Speaker 2: My cost per clicks went up by whatever percent, and I want to figure out why it's.
• 22:13
  Speaker 2: The first thing is not why it's.
• 22:14
  Speaker 2: How can we get the cost per click back down?
• 22:17
  Speaker 2: How can we get the cost per click back down?
• 22:18
  Speaker 2: How can we get the CPL down?
• 22:21
  Speaker 2: So you want to ask different questions instead of the why is it happening?
• 22:24
  Speaker 2: Sometimes you've got to know why at a deeper level, to really get down to the root cause and then start asking the how, the what, the who.
• 22:30
  Speaker 2: But sometimes, more often than not, we're just like man why won't this get in the right direction?
• 22:36
  Speaker 2: And we start to feel frustration or whatever your emotion is.
• 22:40
  Speaker 2: Sometimes it's for me it's frustration that leads to anger, that leads to rage.
• 22:44
  Speaker 2: If I'm not, if I don't interrupt it, some people it's frustration and then withdraw and we then bury it down and try to push through it and we're asking those questions.
• 22:56
  Speaker 2: Now you got to find out what the limiting belief is, and sometimes here's a hack when you ask yourself okay, I've got this specific challenge.
• 23:04
  Speaker 2: What must I do that I don't want to do in order to overcome it or achieve the opposite of that and actually achieve my goal?
• 23:13
  Speaker 2: What must I do?
• 23:14
  Speaker 2: That I don't want to do is gonna flood you with a bunch of answers that are gonna lead to your limiting belief and nine times out of 10, it comes goal.
• 23:17
  Speaker 2: What must I do?
• 23:17
  Speaker 2: That I don't want to do is going to flood you with a bunch of answers that are going to lead to your limiting belief, and nine times out of ten, it comes down to two fears.
• 23:22
  Speaker 2: You're either you have a fear of not being loved or you have a fear of not being enough.
• 23:27
  Speaker 2: Those are the two main fears.
• 23:29
  Speaker 2: A lot of people say it's failure or success.
• 23:31
  Speaker 2: Both failure and success stem all the way down to I'm afraid of not being enough and I'm afraid of not being loved because I'm not enough.
• 23:39
  Speaker 2: So you really got to drill down and ask yourself that question what must I do that I don't want to do in order to solve this problem?
• 23:46
  Speaker 2: And list that out and then figure out well, why do I have those and how can I?
• 23:50
  Speaker 2: How did I come to be, you know, having these problems and what do I need to do?
• 23:53
  Speaker 2: When did I decide to have this as a problem?
• 23:55
  Speaker 2: These are all these questions that you'll ask yourself and you're like Jen when did I decide to have a problem?
• 24:00
  Speaker 2: I didn't decide this.
• 24:02
  Speaker 2: It's just happening to me and I would.
• 24:04
  Speaker 2: I would invite you to reassess that, because at some point, if you close your eyes and you go back in time, you're going to remember a specific time where it didn't go the way you thought and you made an unconscious decision to start responding that way in order to avoid a pain, and so what I usually do is I'll ask people in the room I do a retreat every three or four months with my mastermind of one-on-one people and I'll ask them let's come to the retreat and whatever your most pressing challenge is, I'm going to rewire it and I can do it in a group setting.
• 24:35
  Speaker 2: I could actually do it right now if you wanted me to.
• 24:37
  Speaker 2: I can get the crowd anybody listening and rewire them with using language.
• 24:43
  Speaker 2: And then, if you, you know, after you get rid of this pressing problem, obviously you're going to make some progress, and then you're going to hit the next glass ceiling and in order to smash through that glass ceiling, you just come back and re-listen to this process again.
• 24:54
  Speaker 2: But it'll rewire you to not necessarily solve the problem.
• 24:58
  Speaker 2: It'll open up different perspectives so that you see different potential solutions, and the truth is, your solutions are limitless.
• 25:07
  Speaker 2: There are limitless possibilities out there Once we can calm ourselves down and look at it differently.
• 25:13
  Speaker 2: So I would love to be able to do that.
• 25:16
  Speaker 2: If it's okay with you, gib, that would be fantastic, let's do it All right.
• 25:17
  Speaker 1: So let's just here's what it differently.
• 25:18
  Speaker 1: So I would love to be able to do that, if it's okay with you, gib.
• 25:19
  Speaker 1: That would be fantastic, let's do it All right.
• 25:19
  Speaker 2: So let's just here's what it is Audience I need you guys, I want everybody individually Think of your most pressing problem.
• 25:27
  Speaker 2: Just think of it to yourself and think about how big of a problem that is, and just out loud right now, if it's okay with your unconscious mind for me to rewire this and for you to let go of this problem, go ahead and say yes out loud.
• 25:40
  Speaker 2: Now I'm gonna take you on your word that you did that, as long as you said yes, we're gonna engage in this.
• 25:45
  Speaker 2: And now think about that problem again.
• 25:47
  Speaker 2: Think about all of the things that are causing stress, anxiety, worry.
• 25:53
  Speaker 2: What is it that that you will gain once you're rid of this problem?
• 25:56
  Speaker 2: And then, what is it that you will gain once you're rid of this problem?
• 25:58
  Speaker 2: And then what is it that?
• 25:59
  Speaker 2: What's the ultimate cost if you don't decide to get rid of this problem?
• 26:02
  Speaker 2: Think about that and think about the problem.
• 26:04
  Speaker 2: And what I want you to do is you think about this problem and you have this problem, but what would happen if you didn't have this problem?
• 26:10
  Speaker 2: What would happen if you did?
• 26:12
  Speaker 2: What wouldn't happen if you did and what wouldn't happen if you didn't?
• 26:15
  Speaker 2: And I want you to think about what's wrong.
• 26:17
  Speaker 2: What caused the problem?
• 26:18
  Speaker 2: How have you failed to resolve this?
• 26:20
  Speaker 2: How can you overcome the solution to your problem?
• 26:22
  Speaker 2: What would you like to change and when will you stop it from being a limitation and how many ways?
• 26:26
  Speaker 2: Do you know that you've already solved this and I know you're seeing and looking at things differently now.
• 26:32
  Speaker 2: Okay, so now I want you to go back.
• 26:33
  Speaker 2: What's the problem?
• 26:34
  Speaker 2: How do you know?
• 26:34
  Speaker 2: When did you decide that?
• 26:38
  Speaker 2: When don't you do it now?
• 26:39
  Speaker 2: What are you not deciding when you don't do it?
• 26:40
  Speaker 2: How is that different from how you were?
• 26:41
  Speaker 2: And how do you do that and know that now?
• 26:43
  Speaker 2: And what other changes would you like to make?
• 26:46
  Speaker 2: I want you to go inside and try and begin to have this same problem.
• 26:49
  Speaker 2: It was a terrible problem, wasn't it?
• 26:51
  Speaker 2: And you want to make changes, haven't you?
• 26:53
  Speaker 2: And what would it be like when you've made those changes, now and in the future, as you look back and you see what it was like to have had that problem, as you think about it now, if you can make that change for yourself, so that you could stop having made that change and see yourself now?
• 27:06
  Speaker 2: Do you like the way you look, making that change and looking back at yourself, having made that change.
• 27:12
  Speaker 2: Now and now I want you to just shake your body out.
• 27:14
  Speaker 2: Do you smell popcorn?
• 27:16
  Speaker 2: Probably not.
• 27:17
  Speaker 2: I just need to break your pattern.
• 27:19
  Speaker 2: So here's the thing.
• 27:20
  Speaker 2: All of those questions were that was neuro-linguistic programming.
• 27:24
  Speaker 2: I was using language.
• 27:25
  Speaker 2: I was saying things like you want to make changes, haven't you?
• 27:27
  Speaker 2: That implies you already made the change.
• 27:29
  Speaker 2: So your unconscious mind has already now made the decision to solve this problem and see things differently.
• 27:34
  Speaker 2: Now it's going to see different possible solutions and every time you face another challenge, you could come back and re-listen to that segment and rewire yourself and you'll start seeing limitless possibilities that you can take action on.
• 27:46
  Speaker 2: Hopefully that was helpful.
• 27:48
  Speaker 1: I love that.
• 27:48
  Speaker 1: Yeah, no, that is absolutely helpful.
• 27:50
  Speaker 1: I think it's just so important.
• 27:54
  Speaker 1: Mindset and thinking through these things is so important.
• 27:57
  Speaker 1: For a business owner and an entrepreneur.
• 27:59
  Speaker 1: I mean it's not that different from being a professional athlete or doing something like that.
• 28:04
  Speaker 1: I mean it's, it's um, I think it's just as important, if not more, um, then you know, being an athlete really cool similarities there.
• 28:13
  Speaker 1: So, jen, um.
• 28:14
  Speaker 1: So tell me, for folks that um have listened to the episode, have really enjoyed getting to hear from you and want to learn more, what's the best way for them to reach out to you?
• 28:24
  Speaker 2: You know, if you reached out to me on email, it's jconkey, so j-c-o-n-k-e-y 630 at gmailcom.
• 28:34
  Speaker 2: This is the best email.
• 28:35
  Speaker 2: Just reach out and in the subject say mindset course.
• 28:39
  Speaker 2: If you do that, I will give you free access to my mindset course, my entry level one that helps you identify your resilience factor.
• 28:48
  Speaker 2: You know, when you bump up against these challenges, I have a really cool assessment that you could take and it shows you where you are in terms of building your resiliency to overcome problems.
• 29:00
  Speaker 2: And then I also have in there, where you can, some specific activities to strengthen your resiliency.
• 29:05
  Speaker 2: So I'll give that to you for free if you email me and just put mindset course in the subject.
• 29:09
  Speaker 1: All right, fantastic.
• 29:11
  Speaker 1: Well, jen, look, it's been an absolute pleasure having you on and it's really good to see you, and I look forward to catching up with you more soon.
• 29:17
  Speaker 1: Thanks again.
• 29:18
  Speaker 2: Thank you, gibb, thanks for having me.
• 29:24
  Speaker 1: Thank you for listening to this episode of Go Big with Gibb.
• 29:26
  Speaker 1: If you haven't already, go follow us on social media at Gibb Irons.
• 29:30
  Speaker 1: We'll see you next time.