Latest / Thrive After 45® | Life After 45, Self-Trust, Midlife Women / The "Duck Syndrome" is the Silent Thief of your Success - with Rochel Lawson

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The "Duck Syndrome" is the Silent Thief of your Success - with Rochel Lawson · Thrive After 45® | Life After 45, Self-Trust, Midlife Women

• 0:00
  Hello, and welcome to today's episode of Thrive after 45.
• 0:05
  I'm Denise Drink Walter heart whisperer, midlife mirror and mentor.
• 0:10
  And every week I am honored to share energy and space with inspiring guests.
• 0:17
  Whose stories reflect so many possibilities of thriving beyond 45?
• 0:22
  Together we'll uncover the whispers of the heart, the power of midlife transformation, and the wisdom that fuels expansion.
• 0:30
  What if the reason so many successful women feel exhausted isn't because they're doing too much, but because they're doing it disconnected?
• 0:42
  From their bodies.
• 0:43
  It's an honor and a privilege to welcome Rochelle Lawson to our show today.
• 0:50
  Rochelle is a registered nurse.
• 0:52
  I revert Veda health practitioner and multi-business CEO.
• 0:57
  With more than 30 years of lived, earned and embodied experience for over 34 years, Rochelle has led a woman oriented.
• 1:06
  Minority owned telecommunications company in male dominated, high pressure industries, building and sustaining success while navigating the invisible weight of leadership, stress, financial responsibility, and systemic pressure.
• 1:23
  Her expertise didn't come from theory alone.
• 1:27
  She built success.
• 1:28
  She felt the cost of it in her body.
• 1:31
  And she chose to recalibrate that crossroads led Rochelle into deep study of Eastern and western healing modalities, neuroscience informed coaching, and the ancient wisdom of I Veda.
• 1:46
  Not as concepts, but as lived practice.
• 1:49
  Through her work with over 10,000 women, she's witnessed a consistent truth when a woman's nervous system, mindset and body are out of alignment, her leadership.
• 2:01
  Confidence and wealth suffer when those foundations are restored.
• 2:06
  Everything shifts today, Rochelle blend science, strategy, soul, and structure to help women restore their health, reclaim their power, and build wealth without sacrificing themselves in the process.
• 2:20
  This conversation is for every woman who has succeeded on the outside.
• 2:26
  Knows there's more possible on the inside.
• 2:30
  Welcome to our show today, Rochelle.
• 2:32
  I can't wait to have this conversation.
• 2:34
  Well, thank you so much.
• 2:35
  It's a pleasure to be here.
• 2:39
  And just for the record, my name is Rochelle Marie.
• 2:42
  Okay.
• 2:43
  Oh my apologies.
• 2:44
  Thank you for clarifying worries.
• 2:46
  That's perfect.
• 2:47
  I will make sure that we correct that in all the right spots.
• 2:52
  Love it.
• 2:53
  Perfect.
• 2:54
  How in the world do we ever take all of the pressures that we as women feel and.
• 3:06
  Create that no longer duck.
• 3:11
  Persona where you're on the top, everything looks fine, but underneath just paddling like crazy.
• 3:18
  In order to stay afloat, well, first of all, we have to actually give ourselves permission to understand that we are under a lot of pressure, tremendous pressure.
• 3:30
  We have to recognize it.
• 3:31
  It's, and I, what I find a lot is that women discount it.
• 3:35
  They don't recognize it because they've been doing it for so long.
• 3:38
  It's like these freckles on my face, you just, they blur, right?
• 3:43
  Yeah.
• 3:43
  And so, um, if you don't honor yourself.
• 3:47
  Truly honor yourself.
• 3:48
  You can't recognize when you're just basically, like you said, the duck looking beautiful on top, but struggling underneath and hiding it consistently so nobody knows.
• 4:00
  And so the first step is really to.
• 4:03
  Recognize that yeah, you are going through some things.
• 4:06
  You are struggling.
• 4:07
  Yeah.
• 4:08
  And then once you begin to recognize it, that is when you can begin to address it.
• 4:12
  And that's like with anything in life, you know?
• 4:15
  Yeah.
• 4:15
  Bad relationships, bad kids, bad situations, um, or good, you know, you have to recognize it first in order to be able to internalize it and then process it.
• 4:28
  When we recognize it, I know a lot of women that I support, recognize it, but then don't know what to do.
• 4:39
  Right.
• 4:39
  They, they see it, they witness it.
• 4:41
  They, they talk to friends about it.
• 4:43
  But it just is a cycle of talking and not knowing what to do or, yeah, this is just the way life is and I'm gonna survive it, and next year I'm gonna push my way past it or figure it out another, you know, I don't have time right now, but I can do that later, I promise.
• 5:02
  You know, the beautiful thing about Ayurveda and my background as an emergency room trauma nurse, as well as in the ER setting, you could have multiple chaotic, catastrophic things going on with your patients.
• 5:17
  Mm-hmm.
• 5:17
  But the first thing is to recognize what's the most life threatening thing that if you don't take care of that first, then your patient will not even.
• 5:29
  Survive, let alone thrive.
• 5:30
  Right, right.
• 5:31
  So with us women, the first thing we have to recognize, and the beautiful thing about Ayurveda is we have to recognize our own unique essence in the world.
• 5:42
  As little girls we watch our moms, our aunties, our grand.
• 5:46
  Smalls do stuff without even understanding or recognizing all the stuff that they're doing that's underneath the surface.
• 5:54
  So with Ayurveda, what it teaches you is you have a unique essence in the world, and that unique essence is like.
• 6:02
  No one else is on the planet.
• 6:04
  It's created at the moment of conception when the, the eggs tells that sperm, oh yeah, you're the one.
• 6:10
  Um, let's make a baby.
• 6:12
  That's the moment your unique essence is created, and once you understand your unique essence, which is called your dosha in Ayurveda, it is from that foundational level that you can begin to know more about you.
• 6:25
  Uniquely you internally and how you ebb and flow and the things that kind of can cause chaos with your natural flow of how you should Harmon Ally go through life.
• 6:36
  And so it starts with the recognition of what I am and then looking around and seeing what is the most catastrophic thing.
• 6:45
  Mm-hmm.
• 6:45
  That's upsetting my unique essence.
• 6:48
  And then at that point you can begin to figure out like those patients I took care of, what's the nest?
• 6:55
  Best step, right?
• 6:57
  That's gonna help me not only survive, but to thrive as I'm surviving.
• 7:02
  And that's pretty much it.
• 7:03
  It is just really getting in touch with yourself and understanding your unique essence in the world and how you ebb and flow in your own little divine bubble.
• 7:15
  Love that.
• 7:15
  Love that.
• 7:16
  That whole piece of individuality is so paramount, isn't it?
• 7:22
  Yes, it is.
• 7:23
  Yeah.
• 7:23
  I tell people, even identical twins don't have this unique essence.
• 7:28
  Um, yeah.
• 7:29
  You know, that one sperm may have pre, you know, fertilize that egg in the egg broke off into two and yes, identical 10 twins are very connected as well as fraternal twins, but they all have their own unique.
• 7:41
  Essence.
• 7:42
  Mm-hmm.
• 7:42
  And so it's just understanding that you're a gift to the world.
• 7:46
  Mm-hmm.
• 7:47
  And your uniqueness is not a detriment, it's not a curse.
• 7:52
  It's a beautiful, beautiful essence that allows you to share only what you can share with the world, how you share it with the world.
• 8:01
  And so it really is a beautiful, beautiful thing.
• 8:03
  But in our world, we're so.
• 8:07
  Externally driven and motivated, yes, to get out of touch with the uniqueness within ourselves, and it's really coming back to you and it's not being selfish.
• 8:17
  It's doing the best thing we can for those that you love and care about as well.
• 8:22
  I love that we talk about that all the time on this show for you, by you because of you.
• 8:27
  And when you fill your own cup, then you have the capacity to support all those in your sphere of influence.
• 8:36
  When you are, your cup is empty, you think you are doing, but you really aren't doing from the cup that you need to fulfill from, right?
• 8:45
  Yes.
• 8:46
  Yes.
• 8:47
  Yes.
• 8:47
  Yeah.
• 8:48
  Yeah.
• 8:50
  I think it's very important.
• 8:52
  One of the things you just shared, um, Rochelle memory is about you are a gift no matter what anybody else says or thinks or does around you.
• 9:08
  That is a seed that I think all of us need to really plant and water.
• 9:18
  Right now and feed Right.
• 9:22
  I agree.
• 9:23
  I agree.
• 9:23
  Yeah.
• 9:23
  I think sometimes even, you know, and, and to put a spin on it.
• 9:27
  Sure.
• 9:28
  Um, even those people that do the most, he heinous things in the world.
• 9:34
  Mm-hmm.
• 9:34
  You know?
• 9:34
  Mm-hmm.
• 9:35
  Um, they are a gift.
• 9:38
  Believe it or not, because without them doing their divine mission, which is to be chaotic and to do heinous things, we would not be able to understand the essence of what our true nature is and how we should thrive and survive or ebb and flow as we travel down our pla path to bliss.
• 9:57
  So in my mind, mm-hmm.
• 10:00
  Everyone.
• 10:01
  Has a mission.
• 10:02
  Some mission, some people's missions are not always that good, you know, our right, but it's in the mission that we learn so much more about ourselves and how to circumvent chaos in our life if we're truly paying attention, and we're truly tapped into, again, our own unique essence.
• 10:23
  So what is, let's, let's pull apart a little bit so we as an audience can understand more about Ayurveda.
• 10:33
  I never say it right.
• 10:34
  I apologize.
• 10:35
  Tell me again how to say it.
• 10:36
  I, you said it.
• 10:37
  You just said it, right.
• 10:39
  Okay.
• 10:39
  Okay.
• 10:40
  I'm, I put it in my notes phonetically just to make sure I tried to do it properly.
• 10:46
  Did what is it exactly?
• 10:52
  And help us to understand how that.
• 10:57
  Provides the stability and the foundation for what you're speaking of in terms of understanding our mission as an individual.
• 11:06
  So Ayurveda is an ancient, uh, holistic modality that originated in India, but anywhere between, uh, 3,500 to 7,000 years ago.
• 11:17
  And it was based on a utilization of the divine has here on earth for us to keep us healthy and balanced and harmonically flowing.
• 11:24
  If you think back to like the.
• 11:26
  Ancient cultures of Egypt, ancient Egypt, everything they utilized was what we had here on earth.
• 11:32
  There were no pharmaceutical companies making things.
• 11:35
  Sure they were using herbs and divineness, right?
• 11:37
  Mm-hmm.
• 11:38
  Same thing with Ayurveda.
• 11:39
  And so the beautiful thing about Ayurveda is it taps into everything within the universe.
• 11:47
  So when I say you're unique.
• 11:49
  Essence or your dosha?
• 11:51
  Your dosha.
• 11:52
  There's three main doshas.
• 11:53
  One is, uh, Vata, which is comprised of a lot of air and ether the elements.
• 11:58
  Right?
• 11:59
  Okay.
• 11:59
  Yep.
• 12:00
  Then there's the pitted dosha, which is fire and earth.
• 12:03
  A lot of, lot of fire.
• 12:05
  And then there's the capo, which is a more stable earth and water.
• 12:09
  And so when you think of these unique essence or these unique people, um, every one of those doshas and, and.
• 12:19
  They can, you can have a multitude of compositions of between the three, but you have one main dominant one.
• 12:24
  Right.
• 12:25
  Okay.
• 12:25
  First, I myself, I'm a pta, so I'm full of fire.
• 12:28
  Okay.
• 12:29
  I'm creative, I'm innovative.
• 12:31
  I'm a vision visionary.
• 12:32
  I have, um, tenacity that will drive you crazy and I just, you know, go through the fire, so to speak.
• 12:41
  Yeah.
• 12:42
  Um, and so for me, when I'm out of balance.
• 12:46
  It's the, the chaos.
• 12:48
  I'm very sharp, very short.
• 12:50
  I'm very, I cut to the chase.
• 12:53
  I mean, I'm not, I don't always phonetically deliver the message appropriately or nice and touchy feely.
• 12:59
  Right, right.
• 13:01
  But, um, also within the essence of that, within my body, those are the things that are also.
• 13:06
  Out of balance with me, I have a lot more fire, so I tend to have more digestive issues or, uh, more cardiac issues or my reproductive system is more full of fire, things of that nature.
• 13:19
  Mm-hmm.
• 13:19
  So understanding that, and that's what Ayurveda does, it helps you to understand how beautifully we are all connected to the essences on our planet as well as the universe and how when we're out of balance.
• 13:34
  Those things show up, and then it gives really the game plan on how to correct those imbalances that are unique to you and for you so that you can Harmon ally flow through life like we're all supposed to.
• 13:49
  So, yeah, it's, it's beautiful.
• 13:51
  Ayurveda encompasses, uh, detoxification and, you know, when you think about western medicine, you have psychiatry, you know, pediatrics, cardiology, respiratory, all of that same thing within Ayurveda, the disciplines of, okay, just.
• 14:07
  Formulated it different and they work on the systems.
• 14:11
  And Ayurveda is about getting to the root cause of the imbalance, the illness or disease, instead of masking and eliminating it, instead of masking it.
• 14:21
  Hmm.
• 14:22
  With medications that take care of the symptoms, but don't do anything for the root cause of the disease.
• 14:27
  And so, right.
• 14:29
  Um, it, it, it's a beautiful practice.
• 14:32
  It's a, it's a beautiful discipline.
• 14:33
  It's a reason why it's been around for thousands of years and why still continues to thrive and actually it's becoming in more mainstream.
• 14:40
  But I became a nurse 35 years, almost 36 years ago.
• 14:44
  Nobody talking about Ayurveda, but yet I still shared it with my patients in the er and as.
• 14:51
  The medical community has evolved now, you see mm-hmm.
• 14:55
  Western medicine physicians reaching out and learning about eastern medicine practices and then beginning to incorporate those into their clinical practices as well.
• 15:05
  So, uh, it's beautiful.
• 15:07
  It's a, it's a, it's.
• 15:08
  A complimentary, um, mm-hmm.
• 15:11
  Way of living with western medicine or it can be a dominant way and you use Western medicine.
• 15:16
  It's complimentary, but it's a beautiful asset.
• 15:18
  Very beautiful.
• 15:19
  Right.
• 15:20
  And, and what I'm understanding is you're sharing all of the components, is that it is, um, available to all of us.
• 15:30
  Right, in terms of understanding and capitalizing on the strengths and knowing who you are as an individual, and your body speaks loudly when you are available to listen, right?
• 15:43
  Yeah.
• 15:44
  Yes.
• 15:45
  The more we don't listen, the louder the body speak.
• 15:50
  Yes.
• 15:52
  Yeah.
• 15:53
  Until you have this crisis and then you end up in the ER with someone like me taking care of you and Right.
• 16:00
  Yeah.
• 16:00
  I'm not clinically practicing anymore, but I'm still licensed in.
• 16:03
  Um, right.
• 16:04
  Okay.
• 16:04
  But yeah, you know, that's when you end up in, you know, a chaotic situation, um, that has probably been going on for years, but you neglect to listen to.
• 16:15
  Because you just had to take care of everybody else and everybody else's challenges and everybody else's things.
• 16:20
  And, and, and that's the other thing I would say is ladies and gentlemen mm-hmm.
• 16:26
  We need to put ourselves first before our jobs, before our kids, before our spouses, before anything external.
• 16:32
  Because once you can stand in that pillar of epitome of health and wellbeing within your mind, body, spirit, and soul.
• 16:39
  Hmm.
• 16:40
  We become unstoppable and we all should be unstoppable.
• 16:43
  And I think that's something we should teach our children at a very young age, is to listen to themselves and not neglect what their insights telling them.
• 16:52
  Yeah, because it's super powerful.
• 16:55
  How do we begin that journey?
• 17:00
  We know it here.
• 17:01
  We talk all the time about self care and making sure you look after yourself.
• 17:08
  First words are easier said than actual practice, and I think that's why we, part of the reason why we have the show, because we know the gifts and talents of my guests such as yourself, sharing this important work.
• 17:26
  It must be done in order for us to stay strong and grounded.
• 17:32
  How do we move it from conversation into action?
• 17:37
  Um, I think really you have to, again, it's all about putting yourself first.
• 17:44
  Mm-hmm.
• 17:44
  People think that, you know.
• 17:46
  Incorporating practices like Ayurveda or, or any other, you know, modality that's holistic is complex.
• 17:53
  For instance, meditation.
• 17:55
  Sure.
• 17:55
  People think that I need to sit and I need to, you know, be quiet and I need to, you know, close my eyes and meditate for 20 to 30 minutes or longer, and who got to, who in this day and age has time for that.
• 18:05
  Okay.
• 18:06
  Okay.
• 18:07
  Right.
• 18:08
  So they don't do it.
• 18:09
  They know they should.
• 18:10
  Yeah.
• 18:10
  But they don't do it because it's like, I can't take 20 minutes outta my day for myself.
• 18:13
  Right, right.
• 18:14
  Like, which is crazy.
• 18:16
  I know.
• 18:16
  Crazy.
• 18:17
  However, you can take 20 minutes to go to Starbucks and get and pay$900 for that cup of coffee.
• 18:23
  That is really bad for your system.
• 18:25
  Think about the time you go drive there.
• 18:27
  Yeah.
• 18:27
  Wait, fly.
• 18:28
  Get the coffee, pay the money.
• 18:30
  That's what, more than 20 minutes.
• 18:32
  So here's the thing I say.
• 18:34
  Yeah.
• 18:34
  Something simple you can start doing today before you even get out of bed when you wake up.
• 18:39
  Mm-hmm.
• 18:39
  Don't just hop out of bed.
• 18:41
  Take a minute.
• 18:42
  To check in with your body.
• 18:44
  Mm, how your feet feel, and just go from your toes all the way up to the top of your head.
• 18:49
  Give thanks for being able to wake up to see another day.
• 18:52
  Mm-hmm.
• 18:53
  And go on, get on up and go about your day a minute.
• 18:56
  That one minute.
• 18:58
  Would eventually turn into two minutes because you'll start saying, well, you know, this feels pretty good.
• 19:02
  I'm sitting here, you know, checking in with my body.
• 19:05
  What is my body telling me?
• 19:07
  Um, you know, those thoughts that are always running in my mind.
• 19:10
  Yes.
• 19:11
  Let, let me silence them for a minute and just focus on my toes, my feet, my ankles, my legs, my knees, my thighs, my, you know, middle section, abdomen, and just move up and then get up.
• 19:23
  Um.
• 19:24
  It feels really good.
• 19:26
  The other thing I tell people is we look at ourselves all day.
• 19:29
  You know, we are in the bathroom, we're getting ready.
• 19:31
  We're brushing our teeth.
• 19:32
  We're washing, yeah, doing our hair, whatever.
• 19:35
  Take a moment to look at that beautiful face of yours.
• 19:38
  Looking back at you in the mirror and look into those eyes, those eyes will tell you a lot about how you're feeling in that moment in time.
• 19:47
  Mm-hmm.
• 19:48
  And it's just the recognition that will give you so much power.
• 19:52
  You look back at those eyes and those eyes, if they're looking pretty sad, you know, something's going on.
• 19:57
  Mm-hmm.
• 19:58
  Just tell those eyes you love, I love you, I love whatever you're going through.
• 20:02
  We'll get through this together today.
• 20:04
  Mm-hmm.
• 20:04
  Or if you're happy and you're looking at those eyes, oh, I feel elated.
• 20:07
  I'm gonna go out and conquer the world.
• 20:08
  Maybe I'll start a new business, or whatever it might be.
• 20:11
  Right.
• 20:11
  Um, but it's these simple little things that we neglect that will allow us to check in with ourselves and over time.
• 20:19
  Yeah.
• 20:20
  The essence of that feels so yummy that that minute after you wake up and you do that body chat, well becomes two, becomes five.
• 20:27
  Mm-hmm.
• 20:27
  You can say, okay, I'm checking in with my body now.
• 20:30
  What do I wanna do today?
• 20:31
  What's one positive thing I wanna do today?
• 20:33
  Yeah.
• 20:33
  And it just keeps going forward.
• 20:35
  That in the sense is the beginning.
• 20:38
  Mm-hmm.
• 20:38
  And when you learn to pay attention to the little subtleties within yourself.
• 20:42
  Yeah.
• 20:43
  Yeah.
• 20:43
  It opens up, I don't wanna say Pandora's box.
• 20:46
  It's what it does.
• 20:46
  It opens up a beautiful Pandora's box, lovely gifts that you can utilize to help you thrive as you ebb and flow down your path to bliss.
• 20:55
  And it just starts, it's, it doesn't have to be complex.
• 20:59
  Yeah.
• 20:59
  It can just start with just waking up and going to minute body check.
• 21:02
  And if you think I can don't have time to, I wake up, I just gotta get up.
• 21:06
  Well then you're not honoring yourself and Right.
• 21:08
  Setting yourself on that path to chaos.
• 21:11
  And eventually you will crash and burn.
• 21:13
  I don't care what you're doing.
• 21:15
  Homeschool mom, you know, mom, mom, stay at home mom or the CEO of a culture 500 company.
• 21:21
  You will crash and burn eventually.
• 21:23
  Yeah.
• 21:23
  It'll start to show up in many ways.
• 21:25
  Yeah.
• 21:25
  Yeah.
• 21:26
  And.
• 21:27
  Not that it's too late, but we are here to talk about what you can do so you don't have to go down a path of, oh my gosh, I have to climb back out now.
• 21:39
  Yeah, right.
• 21:40
  Let's, let's tune in.
• 21:44
  Yeah.
• 21:44
  Rochelle Marie is talking about tuning in and it doesn't have to be, carve out that hour at the gym.
• 21:52
  Make that, you know, half hour sometimes that's way too big.
• 21:57
  Just to start.
• 21:58
  So before you get outta bed right, just taking a walk outside.
• 22:03
  If you have an animal and have a dog, take a taking a walk.
• 22:05
  Yeah, dog.
• 22:07
  Okay.
• 22:08
  Don't have time for a walk.
• 22:09
  Just go sit outside for a minute.
• 22:11
  Yeah.
• 22:11
  Tap in the sun, the cold, the heat, the ground, the earth hug a tree, kissing, flower, whatever it is.
• 22:17
  Yeah.
• 22:18
  Just taking those moments of preciousness at a stoplight.
• 22:22
  Look at yourself in the rear of your mirror.
• 22:24
  Another way to check in.
• 22:26
  You know, simple little things like that.
• 22:28
  Instead of cussing at at person, I just cut you off.
• 22:30
  Look at yourself in the mirror and be like, okay, I'm full of fire right now.
• 22:34
  Let me calm the flames.
• 22:35
  Yeah.
• 22:35
  Let me calm the flames.
• 22:37
  Just simple little, simple little things.
• 22:39
  Mm-hmm.
• 22:40
  Um, have such a profound effect.
• 22:42
  Mm-hmm.
• 22:42
  I know.
• 22:43
  I remember back in the day when I first became a nurse, went into this, uh, it was a code.
• 22:48
  We had a patient coming in.
• 22:49
  Yeah.
• 22:50
  Lights and sirens.
• 22:51
  So they're bumping on the chest as he is.
• 22:53
  They're rolling this person in.
• 22:54
  Yeah.
• 22:55
  And the physician, this is my very first code.
• 22:56
  He was like, you just take it one, one thing at a time.
• 23:01
  Yep.
• 23:01
  If you get caught up in the chaos of what's going on and all these people and all the moments, you'll be lost and you, you'll lose yourself.
• 23:08
  So just take it.
• 23:10
  One moment, one issue, one thing, one item at a time, process it, and then move on to the next.
• 23:17
  And at the end of the day, you'll look back and say, you know what?
• 23:20
  I had those fires I put out, but I did it with grace and ease that honored my soul and spiritual, spiritual wellbeing.
• 23:27
  And I feel really, really, really good.
• 23:30
  Really, it takes practice.
• 23:31
  Don't get me wrong, of course, it's not something that's gonna change overnight, but it takes practice.
• 23:36
  But the more you do it, the better it feels.
• 23:38
  And it's.
• 23:38
  Yeah, it's like eating apple pie.
• 23:41
  You have one slice That's really good.
• 23:43
  You want another one, right?
• 23:44
  Yeah.
• 23:44
  The more you it, the better it feels and the better it is for you.
• 23:48
  It's so interesting.
• 23:49
  As you're talking, I'm smiling.
• 23:52
  Um, for those who are seeing this on YouTube, if you're in the podcast land, I have a huge smile on my face because there's one thing I've always done, um, ever since I've been a parent and now grandparenting and I ask, how was your day?
• 24:07
  And invariably one of the grandchildren, oh, it was awful, blah, blah, blah.
• 24:14
  Right?
• 24:14
  And I'm smiling because I'm like, we do that, don't we?
• 24:18
  We, we have one tiny piece that didn't go well.
• 24:22
  It hits our heart center, and that's the thing we perseverate on, not looking at.
• 24:28
  All of the positives that have happened over the day, we sink ourselves into the depths of despair of that negative thing that happened.
• 24:37
  And so of course I converse and we flip the script and talk about what, what did happen that was good.
• 24:45
  Oh well this and this and this.
• 24:47
  And all of a sudden you hear all the positives that do happen.
• 24:50
  So even the way that we.
• 24:53
  Reflect on our day, making sure that we totally see the positives that have happened as well, and really centering ourselves in those because our mind tends to take us to all the negative Nelly, which is probably 0.0002 of our day percent, and we Right.
• 25:14
  We just eat that up and.
• 25:17
  It doesn't help us, and it doesn't help anybody in our sphere of influence.
• 25:21
  So yeah, it isn't, you mentioned something that I thought was really cool when my kids were growing up.
• 25:26
  Yeah.
• 25:26
  You asked, I'd pick'em up.
• 25:27
  Like, how was, how was, you know, how was your day?
• 25:29
  Good.
• 25:30
  Yeah.
• 25:31
  I never, ever, never, ever, I'm like, well, what?
• 25:34
  What does that mean?
• 25:36
  Yeah.
• 25:36
  You know, and as they got older, they understood, like, like they said, because good, you can have a horrible day and tell somebody it's good.
• 25:44
  Right?
• 25:45
  Well, what, what, what, what, you know, what happened?
• 25:48
  Um, I think starting with our children at a young age Yeah.
• 25:53
  Allows them the capability and the capacity to feel comfortable when they had that 1.00 thing that really set them off.
• 26:03
  Right?
• 26:04
  Yeah.
• 26:04
  And, um.
• 26:05
  I don't think that's done enough in today's society with our kids.
• 26:09
  That's why these kids have lots of issues and they struggle because we allow social media to be that parent when we should be digging down and saying, okay, you know, Sarah, what?
• 26:21
  You had a good day?
• 26:22
  Okay, what?
• 26:22
  What happened?
• 26:23
  That was good?
• 26:23
  Or what happened a day or.
• 26:26
  Finding out, um, whether the day really wasn't that good.
• 26:29
  Right?
• 26:29
  Everybody's, I'll ask a patient, how are you feeling?
• 26:33
  Good.
• 26:33
  Then why are you in here?
• 26:34
  Yeah.
• 26:34
  You're in emergency department, right?
• 26:36
  You know, if you're feeling good, why are you in the emergency department?
• 26:39
  You know what I mean?
• 26:39
  Or, yes.
• 26:41
  I think just opening up dialogue.
• 26:43
  If it's your kids, your spouse, your Yep.
• 26:47
  Siblings, friends, whatever, open up the, when they say, good, what, what, what, what does that mean?
• 26:53
  Yes.
• 26:54
  And you will, um, you will, you will experience a transformation taking place in that moment in time with that'cause that good doesn't necessarily mean good.
• 27:04
  Or it may be, you know, I closed this$5 million deal and Right.
• 27:07
  You know, so it, it, again, it starts with, um.
• 27:11
  Just checking in.
• 27:12
  Yeah.
• 27:12
  And then of course, you know, understanding the unique essence that we flow all are different and, and complimentary to each other, whether it's good, bad, or indifferent.
• 27:22
  But we all can learn from each other and, and help each other to survive and thrive just by doing those small little check-ins.
• 27:29
  Absolutely.
• 27:30
  And really I think a part, another part of that is listening to what they say and really feeding it back so they can really understand what it is they're saying instead of it just an answer so I can carry on, right?
• 27:46
  Yeah, yeah.
• 27:47
  Because the, the real answer is in listening to what they're saying, what they're not saying, right?
• 27:53
  Yes.
• 27:54
  Absolutely.
• 27:55
  You learn a lot watching the whole learn, right?
• 27:57
  The whole body picture.
• 27:59
  Absolutely.
• 28:00
  Absolutely.
• 28:01
  Yes, yes.
• 28:03
  So I have a question.
• 28:05
  When women are successful, let's say even on paper, but exhausted in their bodies, what's the cost that we're actually not even naming, and why do so many women wait until burnout forces them to actually listen?
• 28:23
  I think, um, the cost of, one of the cost of not listening is because you don't know how to listen.
• 28:28
  You're not paying attention.
• 28:29
  No one's ever taught.
• 28:31
  No one teaches little girls or little boys to listen to themselves, right?
• 28:36
  Mm-hmm.
• 28:36
  It's all external.
• 28:37
  We live in an externally gratifying world, and so the cost of not listening to yourself can be detrimental until the point.
• 28:46
  Where something shows up and then you have to pay attention.
• 28:49
  And even in those moments in time, people will still discount that, right?
• 28:53
  Yeah.
• 28:54
  Yeah.
• 28:54
  So what I say is, um, sit humble with yourself.
• 29:02
  Mm-hmm.
• 29:02
  We're not perfect.
• 29:04
  No one's perfect.
• 29:05
  We all go through things.
• 29:07
  Yeah.
• 29:08
  Don't be afraid to admit.
• 29:10
  To a best friend or a colleague, or, heck, if you don't wanna do that, like me, I'm kind of really private.
• 29:17
  Mm-hmm.
• 29:18
  But I know I need to get stuff out.
• 29:20
  Pull out a journal piece of paper and write out what you're feeling, what you're going through, what it is that's troubling, or what is good when you get it out of you.
• 29:31
  Particularly on paper, and you could always, always, if you don't wanna tell anybody, you could always write it out and you can burn it.
• 29:38
  Yeah, you can burn that in the paper afterwards and watch all of that go up in flames.
• 29:42
  It'll do two things for you.
• 29:44
  One, you get it out of you, so it's not internally stressing your systems out that you don't even recognize the pressure you're putting on your cardiovascular system, your reproductive system.
• 29:53
  Urinary tract, your respiratory system, your nervous system, right?
• 29:56
  Mm-hmm.
• 29:57
  All of those systems have been flowing.
• 29:58
  When one is out of balance it up, the other ones as well.
• 30:02
  So writing it out, getting it out of you.
• 30:04
  Mm-hmm.
• 30:04
  And then watching it burn.
• 30:05
  It's something very powerful about seeing all that stuff.
• 30:10
  Yep.
• 30:11
  You know, go up in flames.
• 30:12
  It's something very powerful about that.
• 30:14
  You know, you may not notice it right away, but over time you'll start saying.
• 30:19
  Yeah.
• 30:19
  You know, I feel lighter.
• 30:21
  Yeah.
• 30:22
  I can't explain it, but I feel a little bit calmer or I got that stuff out and now and I got it out without telling anybody, so I'm not being judged.
• 30:30
  Right.
• 30:31
  Yes.
• 30:32
  Allows you to get things out so you're not being judged.
• 30:34
  'cause we all know we got friends that you can tell stuff to.
• 30:38
  Or family members, but they'll judge you.
• 30:40
  They may not say it.
• 30:41
  Look on their face.
• 30:42
  Yeah.
• 30:42
  Look in their eyes, that smirk on their mouth, you know, so mm-hmm.
• 30:46
  Get it out.
• 30:47
  I say write it out.
• 30:49
  Mm-hmm.
• 30:49
  And then burn it up and, um mm-hmm.
• 30:52
  And you'll feel so much better.
• 30:54
  Mm-hmm.
• 30:54
  And, um.
• 30:56
  You won't have to, how can I say, make yourselves vulnerable to the judgment of others.
• 31:02
  Right.
• 31:02
  And what this does is it calms your nervous system.
• 31:06
  Mm-hmm.
• 31:06
  Which will in turn talk to your cardiovascular system, which will bring that blood pressure and that heart rate down.
• 31:12
  Nice.
• 31:12
  Which in turn will talk to your urinary system because now you're, you're not pushing so much fluid through, you know, you'll have that respiratory system, your breath will become slower, deeper.
• 31:24
  More beneficial to your body, which again, will enliven your brain and your, again, your nervous system.
• 31:30
  So it's like this circular system that.
• 31:33
  Each system has an effect on each one.
• 31:35
  Right.
• 31:35
  And when we get the cast out of us, yeah, it helps all of those systems to help us to have a much better, as I always say, ebb and flow with our ourselves throughout our day.
• 31:46
  I mean, there's been times that I, I'm full of fire, so I've had that time in my mouth, has erupted on people.
• 31:55
  But, uh, of course over the years, you know, I've learned to just, just write it out.
• 32:00
  Um, yeah, because sometimes.
• 32:03
  What you see and how you interpret things is not any, it's not anyone else's reality, but your own.
• 32:10
  Sure.
• 32:10
  Sometimes I hate to say it, our reality could be a little skewed.
• 32:13
  Mm-hmm.
• 32:13
  But if you write it out and read it and then burn it up if you want to, or just, just have this journal.
• 32:18
  Just write it out.
• 32:19
  Yeah.
• 32:20
  Yeah.
• 32:20
  See that each day you progress, it gets better and better, and then you learn and understand more about you.
• 32:27
  Mm.
• 32:27
  Nobody teaches us about us.
• 32:29
  Yeah, right.
• 32:29
  Exactly.
• 32:30
  Exactly.
• 32:31
  Yeah.
• 32:32
  Again, why we have our show for you by you because of you.
• 32:36
  Right.
• 32:37
  So, love it.
• 32:41
  Ah, is there anything, as we're getting ready to close, is there anything that you would absolutely love to share with the audience that we haven't already tapped into?
• 32:55
  I know there's so much we can talk about, but is there one last little.
• 33:00
  Big nugget that you think, you know what, if you leave with this, you've given us so much already, very actionable steps that we can all implement today without any issue.
• 33:14
  Um, anything you'd love to share.
• 33:18
  Yeah.
• 33:19
  So I talk about Ayurveda for being like, for your health and wellbeing, right?
• 33:23
  But you can also use it in your business and your career.
• 33:26
  But here's something I wanna share with, with those listening and, and viewing us.
• 33:30
  You can go to my website and take what is called the dosha quiz.
• 33:35
  You can find out your unique essence of all that we've been talking about and understand a little bit more about you and how you're connected to the, the universal energy, so to speak.
• 33:47
  And then you can get some words of wisdom, tips, guidance, all kind of goodies that will help you to stay in ebb and flow of your digest.
• 33:55
  Your mental system, I mean, your nervous system, your just you, so you can feel just a lot better, um, as you travel down your path to bliss.
• 34:04
  So I would say go grab that.
• 34:07
  Yeah, grab that dosha quiz.
• 34:08
  It's free, it's on the website.
• 34:10
  Take it, find out a little bit more about yourself, and then begin incorporating the tools that you get from the, from the goodies that you receive into your life.
• 34:18
  And just, you know, it's like taking a.
• 34:21
  I, I wanna say a spoonful of sugar, but that's not really, that old movie comes up in my head.
• 34:29
  I can't even think of it now, but you know what I'm talking about.
• 34:31
  Mary Poppins, I think, isn't it?
• 34:33
  Yeah.
• 34:35
  Spoon.
• 34:36
  These kids today don't know about no Mary Poppins, but um Okay.
• 34:39
  A spoonful of Chave.
• 34:42
  There you go.
• 34:43
  Nice jam that we take in IVA for our immune system.
• 34:46
  Um, but, um, again, it.
• 34:49
  It will just help you to understand a lot more about ourselves.
• 34:52
  People don't teach us about ourselves.
• 34:54
  Yeah.
• 34:55
  They don't.
• 34:55
  We don't learn about ourselves.
• 34:57
  We learn about other stuff external to us, but we don't learn about ourselves.
• 35:00
  Yeah.
• 35:01
  And the more we can learn about ourselves, the better we can be in this vast universe that we're living to make the world a better place.
• 35:10
  Beautiful.
• 35:12
  Thank you so much, Rochelle Marie, for everything, your time, your energy, your brilliance that you've shared with us today.
• 35:22
  Um, we will have in the show notes how to access your website.
• 35:27
  It'll be right there so people can just jump right down to the show notes as they're listening and do the assessment and check out where they are and start.
• 35:37
  Implementing these strategies because when we tune into ourselves, everything will change because we will start taking, uh, control of whom we are and really understand who we are without.
• 35:54
  Yes, we have the external world and I really loved how you shared, we're all human.
• 35:59
  There isn't anything.
• 36:01
  Truth in terms of perfection.
• 36:03
  We all have the ups and downs, the ins and outs of sideways, the upside downs.
• 36:08
  That's life.
• 36:09
  How can we be true to ourselves using all of the strategies that you have available on your website and people can access you also through the website, I'm assuming?
• 36:19
  Yes.
• 36:20
  Yeah.
• 36:21
  Yes.
• 36:21
  Yeah, they can if they want no more and have a conversation with them, most definitely I'd be happy to help anyone'cause that's what I'm here to do.
• 36:29
  I'm a perfect, I'm for humanity, and that's why we've connected, because we know your message is so empowering for all of us.
• 36:39
  So make sure you do this for you by you, and because of you.
• 36:44
  And before we close, I do really want to share something very gently with everyone.
• 36:51
  I'm currently stewarding.
• 36:53
  An early formation of a live in-person experience called Ignite the Inner Uprising, and it's going to be created for women in midlife who feel that quiet pull towards something more truthful, more embodied, more their own.
• 37:10
  It isn't an event I'm rushing or loudly promoting.
• 37:14
  It's being built really slowly with deep care and respect for women in midlife whom it's meant to serve.
• 37:23
  So if your body leaned in it.
• 37:25
  At any point during today's conversation or if something really resonated beyond our words, just know this.
• 37:33
  There will be a place to come and gather.
• 37:37
  And for now, simply stay connected, follow, share.
• 37:42
  Give us your reviews so that more women can find us.
• 37:46
  And when the timing is right, you will hear more about Ignite the inner uprising.
• 37:54
  Thank you again, Rochelle Marie, for being with us today.
• 37:58
  Such a privilege to share this time with you.
• 38:02
  Thank you so much for having me, Denise.
• 38:03
  I appreciate you.
• 38:06
  Have a great day everyone.
• 38:07
  I.