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The Fifth Hour: Where is Helmet Man? · The Ben Maller Show

0:00
Speaker 1: Cut booms.
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Speaker 2: If you thought four hours a day, twelve hundred minutes
0:05
Speaker 2: a week was enough, think again. He's the last remnants
0:09
Speaker 2: of the old Republic, a sol fastion of fairness. He
0:12
Speaker 2: treats crackheads in the ghetto gutter the same as the
0:15
Speaker 2: rich pill poppers in the penthouse. Wow to clearinghouse of
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Speaker 2: hot takes, break free for something special. The Fifth Hour
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Speaker 2: with Ben Mahller starts right now in.
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Speaker 3: The air everywhere The Fifth Hour with Me, Ben Mahler
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Speaker 3: and Danny g Radio. A happy Saturday to you as
0:38
Speaker 3: we are recording this early in the morning. You listen
0:40
Speaker 3: whenever you want. You don't have to listen today. Obviously
0:43
Speaker 3: a lot of people listen throughout the week. But we
0:45
Speaker 3: are here early on a Saturday, as the NFL will
0:50
Speaker 3: continue tomorrow. We had Shade Jogis Alexander mess with the
0:55
Speaker 3: basketball gods. I guess that was the story that would
0:57
Speaker 3: have been a monologue last night. He talked about the
1:00
Speaker 3: thunder trying to set the record for wins and people
1:04
Speaker 3: up in arms.
1:05
Speaker 1: You're messing with the basketball gods? What are you doing?
1:08
Speaker 1: You know, all that nonsense. We will not talk about
1:11
Speaker 1: that here.
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Speaker 3: Instead, on this podcast, we have the choice love train true,
1:17
Speaker 3: and in addition to that, we will have time permitting
1:21
Speaker 3: the phrase of the week. But we begin with this,
1:26
Speaker 3: there is a truth that does not require sources.
1:30
Speaker 1: There's a truth that does not require sources.
1:33
Speaker 3: You don't need analytics, you don't need somebody who's verified
1:37
Speaker 3: on social media, you don't need one of those big
1:40
Speaker 3: daytime people. Listen, there's a difference, and we've talked about
1:45
Speaker 3: this a lot over the last couple of years on
1:48
Speaker 3: this podcast, and it's not a slight difference between daytime
1:55
Speaker 3: sports radio and nighttime sports radio. It's not a moderate upgrade.
2:01
Speaker 3: It's not a slightly better ZIP code. It's a totally
2:05
Speaker 3: different ecosystem. The operation during the day it's like Planet
2:11
Speaker 3: per Dium. You get SUVs with tinted windows that pick
2:17
Speaker 3: you up and take you to work. You've got private
2:20
Speaker 3: garages and security guards that outnumber producers and just just
2:26
Speaker 3: all that.
2:27
Speaker 1: All that.
2:28
Speaker 3: The daytime guys broadcasts from gated communities with hedge hedges
2:33
Speaker 3: that are manicured with precision, and they've got people that
2:39
Speaker 3: look out for them and all that stuff. They have
2:40
Speaker 3: parking spots that are reserved for them, and all that stuff.
2:44
Speaker 3: Now when you do the overnight show. We fend for ourselves.
2:47
Speaker 3: We fend for ourselves. It's a badge of honor.
2:49
Speaker 1: Right. We travel light.
2:51
Speaker 3: We don't have an entourage, we don't have seven producers,
2:54
Speaker 3: and all of our travel paid for, and all that
2:57
Speaker 3: we live dangerously. For example, the male praying that the
3:01
Speaker 3: check engine light is merely decorative. In fact, this weekend,
3:06
Speaker 3: the malamobile is sitting in a repair shop as we
3:09
Speaker 3: speak right now. More on that later, which brings me
3:12
Speaker 3: to earlier in the week. Sofi Stadium, or as it
3:18
Speaker 3: is affectionately called by our friend, Sofa stadium, because it
3:23
Speaker 3: looks like something you'd recline on while watching a rerun
3:28
Speaker 3: of House Hunters, or you just don't know how to
3:30
Speaker 3: pronounce so far.
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Speaker 1: So just it looks like it might be sofas it's
3:34
Speaker 1: called sofa.
3:36
Speaker 3: It's proudly in Inglewood, in the hood and up to
3:39
Speaker 3: no good, a neighborhood that blends clamor grit like a
3:44
Speaker 3: cocktail that shouldn't work but somehow does. And I was there.
3:48
Speaker 3: I was there from Monday night football last week. The
3:51
Speaker 3: Philadelphia football team was in town to take on the Chargers, and,
3:56
Speaker 3: as is the normal case, I have to leave early
4:00
Speaker 3: to beat the traffic. So as the fourth quarter began,
4:03
Speaker 3: I did what every overnight sports talk radio host who
4:07
Speaker 3: attends games has to do.
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Speaker 1: I left early.
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Speaker 3: Not out of disrespect, not trying to mess with the
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Speaker 3: football gods, but out of survival. There is a show
4:16
Speaker 3: to do and the commute I must endure. And because
4:21
Speaker 3: of the circadian rhythm that I have and being up
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Speaker 3: all night and actually having to be on time. One
4:28
Speaker 3: of the things about these jobs you can't be late.
4:30
Speaker 3: You can't be late. You got to be when the
4:32
Speaker 3: show starts at a certain time. You can't push it back,
4:35
Speaker 3: be like I'll be there ten minutes later. No, no,
4:36
Speaker 3: you got to be there when it starts. So as
4:39
Speaker 3: I exited so Fi or Sofa Stadium through the VIP
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Speaker 3: media entrance, I was immediately confronted with what we call
4:51
Speaker 3: the choice. I was confronted with the choice. Some would say,
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Speaker 3: it's a fourk in the road now number one. Option
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Speaker 3: Number one was I could turn right now. If you
5:01
Speaker 3: turn right, I had a short walk to the malmobile
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Speaker 3: safety predictability. Those were all the options on Option one
5:10
Speaker 3: to the right now. Option two was to the left.
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Speaker 3: That was a much longer walk. That would have taken
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Speaker 3: me past the NFL Network studios and past the old
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Speaker 3: Great Western Forum where it's called something else now, but
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Speaker 3: the Lakers used to play and the Kings played there
5:26
Speaker 3: back in the day. So option two left turn longer
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Speaker 3: walk past the NFL Network, possibly also the Forum.
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Speaker 1: As I said, and if the stars.
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Speaker 3: Were to align, there would be a run in with
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Speaker 3: a man known as Helmet Man, a character on the show.
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Speaker 3: Now for those that are somehow unfamiliar with the legend
5:50
Speaker 3: that is Helmet Man, and shame on you if you are,
5:52
Speaker 3: it's a bad job by you. He is not merely
5:55
Speaker 3: a character in the Malard militia. He is an institution,
5:59
Speaker 3: Helmet Man. I have known this man since the nineteen nineties.
6:05
Speaker 3: It's been a generation plus that I've known Helmet Man
6:09
Speaker 3: back when local radio was loud and unfiltered and gave
6:14
Speaker 3: strong opinions, even criticized the local teams right and was
6:17
Speaker 3: one bad caller away from FCC intervention. Not now where
6:22
Speaker 3: it's grab ass and rah rah and all that. Now,
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Speaker 3: Helmet Man is from Baltimore. And if you didn't know
6:30
Speaker 3: Helmet Man was from Baltimore, you just have to run
6:32
Speaker 3: into him wearing his Oriole stuff or his Raven stuff
6:35
Speaker 3: or whatever. And when I say he's from Baltimore, not
6:38
Speaker 3: just casually, it's like a religious situation for Helmet Man.
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Speaker 3: The man famously once appeared. I ran into him downtown
6:47
Speaker 3: Los Angeles, just adjacent to skid Row at the arena
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Speaker 3: formerly known as Staples Center, and he was wearing a
6:53
Speaker 3: full Baltimore Orioles uniform, not just the jersey, not a hat,
7:00
Speaker 3: the uniform, batting gloves, he had the helmet. He was
7:04
Speaker 3: doing cal Ripken cosplay, and it was as if Camden
7:09
Speaker 3: Yards had sprouted legs and wandered to the West Coast
7:13
Speaker 3: and he was waiting to go into the batter's box
7:15
Speaker 3: for the Orioles. So Helmet Man, let's just say he's
7:19
Speaker 3: semi retired. He does sell memorabilia. He sells what some
7:24
Speaker 3: would call crap, other people would say very valuable items.
7:28
Speaker 3: At least the items strongly resemble memorabilia.
7:32
Speaker 1: I don't know if they actually are or not.
7:34
Speaker 3: But outside of NFL network, and he's called into the
7:38
Speaker 3: Overnight Show a few times, he always says, well, are
7:41
Speaker 3: you going to be at the game, And I'm like, well,
7:42
Speaker 3: I don't know, if I'll be at the game. And
7:43
Speaker 3: then I said, well I'll be at the game, and
7:44
Speaker 3: say okay, I'm gonna be there. And so think of
7:48
Speaker 3: helmet Man as a roaming museum gift shop. There is
7:54
Speaker 3: no return policy. He only takes cash, and the often,
7:58
Speaker 3: you know, he often tis of the items. It's questionable.
8:03
Speaker 3: So naturally, again we go back to the choice. I
8:05
Speaker 3: had option one, option two I chose. Naturally, I chose
8:08
Speaker 3: option number two. And Overnight Radio trains you to embrace
8:14
Speaker 3: the absurd, and we love it. We look forward to
8:18
Speaker 3: it that the daytime shows take calls from Steven Scott
8:22
Speaker 3: style and let's go to Mikensan Francisco the overnight talk show.
8:27
Speaker 3: Though we get mouthwash Mike telling us how he's been
8:31
Speaker 3: banned from all the MGM properties and all the Caesars properties,
8:35
Speaker 3: and yet he wants to go swimming through the fountains
8:37
Speaker 3: at the Belagio. That's mouthwash Mike, right, followed by a
8:42
Speaker 3: call from Jet who fled Who's calling from a shed
8:46
Speaker 3: whispering about some nonsense and then dropping Glenn Beck's name
8:51
Speaker 3: in while listening to a police scanner hoping not to
8:54
Speaker 3: get caught. You don't avoid the weirdness. You kind of
8:57
Speaker 3: lean into it. You got to lean into it when
8:59
Speaker 3: you do night show. So I started walking and walking.
9:03
Speaker 3: So I walked out of the gate I was supposed
9:06
Speaker 3: to be at. I made the left turn. I walked
9:08
Speaker 3: down about one hundred yards and then I had to
9:13
Speaker 3: make another turn. I had to turn left. So then
9:15
Speaker 3: I turned left, and I kept walking and walking and
9:18
Speaker 3: walking and walking. It felt less like leaving a stadium
9:22
Speaker 3: and more like wandering the Sahara Desert, except instead of
9:26
Speaker 3: sand dunes, I was surrounded by hot dog vendors rhythmically
9:30
Speaker 3: tapping their grills, chanting hot TC, hot Doc, got Doc,
9:33
Speaker 3: Hot Doc. The bacon wrapped hot dog, a staple, that
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Speaker 3: sausage that glistened under the fluorescent lights of these little carts,
9:42
Speaker 3: just a staple of southern California.
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Speaker 1: Go into sport events, and the smell kind of clung.
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Speaker 2: In the air.
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Speaker 3: It was like a at tax almost. You could smell
9:50
Speaker 3: the tacks and you're like trying to tempt you to
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Speaker 3: get one of their hot dogs.
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Speaker 1: So I passed by those people. I kept going. I walked,
9:57
Speaker 1: I walked, I walked.
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Speaker 3: I passed a couple of dumpsters, and I did not
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Speaker 3: realize this at the time, but I was given a show.
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Speaker 1: It was a walk in a show.
10:05
Speaker 3: So I'm going past the dumpsters and I got our
10:08
Speaker 3: own Olympic diving. Someone call it dumpster diving. And these
10:14
Speaker 3: men dove in there with the grace of a gymnast,
10:16
Speaker 3: chasing recyclable glory. It was gritty, it was chaotic, it
10:20
Speaker 3: was dirty, it was smelly. It was unmistakably la or
10:23
Speaker 3: in this case, in the hood in Inglewood. Now I
10:26
Speaker 3: am happy to report that eventually I did reach the
10:31
Speaker 3: NFL network building, the Promised Land, and I saw the
10:35
Speaker 3: logo right there, the propaganda arm of the NFL, the
10:39
Speaker 3: state sponsored media, all that. So I looked at it
10:42
Speaker 3: to the left. I then went to the right. I
10:45
Speaker 3: went back to the left. I went back to the
10:47
Speaker 3: right and pressed DOW. What did I see? A whole
10:54
Speaker 3: giant bag of nothing. A whole giant bag of nothing.
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Speaker 3: Zippo helmet Man was nowhere to be found. Now I
11:06
Speaker 3: carefully planned game. I again had a fork in the road.
11:09
Speaker 3: I go right, go left, I went left, and yeah,
11:14
Speaker 3: the spin off of Where's Waldo and it's Where's helmet Man?
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Speaker 3: Had collapsed. There was no helmet man. There was no
11:23
Speaker 3: man wearing orio gear, no rogue memorabilia merchant in the
11:26
Speaker 3: night lurking in the shadows. Nope, my plan was foiled
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Speaker 3: yet again. So I turned back. I found the malamobile
11:34
Speaker 3: and began the nightly pilgrimage to the palatial studios just
11:39
Speaker 3: down the hill from bel Air in beautiful Sherman Oaks, California.
11:44
Speaker 3: A phrase that sounds luxurious until you're circling the parking
11:49
Speaker 3: lot in the middle of the night.
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Speaker 1: So inside the studio I made it safely.
11:55
Speaker 3: I was continuing my copious amounts of preparation for the
11:59
Speaker 3: over show, and I watched the final moments of the
12:03
Speaker 3: Monday night football game that did go to overtime, overtime
12:07
Speaker 3: before the Chargers pulled it off.
12:10
Speaker 1: Very nice of Jane on Hurst to turn the ball
12:12
Speaker 1: over five times in that game. So that was that.
12:16
Speaker 3: I watched the end of the Monday night game getting
12:19
Speaker 3: ready for my show, kind of calm, quiet and the
12:25
Speaker 3: just mellowness before the madness, the mellowness before the madness.
12:30
Speaker 3: So then I get a call on my phone and
12:33
Speaker 3: as I don't know who that is, and I answer
12:35
Speaker 3: the phone and say it's Ben. Hey, is this Ben Mahler.
12:39
Speaker 3: It's helmet Man on the other month, I said, of
12:41
Speaker 3: course it was. Of course it was. Come on, helmet Man,
12:44
Speaker 3: you know you called me. What do you think somebody
12:46
Speaker 3: else is gonna answer my phone? All right, so you
12:49
Speaker 3: realize you're like the only guy left that uses that technology. Yeah,
12:53
Speaker 3: what do you think about the oil? That is a
12:59
Speaker 3: classic line, helmet man, We just got a new drop,
13:05
Speaker 3: so I answered immediately, and then was interrogated. And then
13:10
Speaker 3: I interrogated him. That's what seasoned detectives do. He asked
13:14
Speaker 3: where I was. I said, what do you mean where
13:16
Speaker 3: I was? You told me you were going to be
13:18
Speaker 3: outside the NFL Network building. You were not there, and
13:22
Speaker 3: he sighed and he said you know because I said
13:25
Speaker 3: what happened? And helmet Man says, I didn't make it
13:28
Speaker 3: to the game. I said, I know that I was there.
13:30
Speaker 3: I didn't see you, So why didn't you make it
13:32
Speaker 3: the game? And then came the most helmet man answer imaginable.
13:38
Speaker 3: He said, in a straight, dead pan delivery, I was
13:45
Speaker 3: in the shower. What he said, I got in the shower,
13:51
Speaker 3: and he said he stayed for roughly ninety minutes and
13:55
Speaker 3: he missed the bus that he was supposed to. Apparently
13:57
Speaker 3: he doesn't live right next I thought he lived right
13:59
Speaker 3: next to Sofia.
14:00
Speaker 1: He does not.
14:01
Speaker 3: He takes a bus there. He missed the bus. So
14:04
Speaker 3: ninety minutes. Let me remind it, ninety minutes to do something.
14:08
Speaker 3: Most people doing about two minutes ninety minute shower and
14:12
Speaker 3: the rest of us are able to navigate this shower
14:17
Speaker 3: and a limited amount of time. But Helmet Man, he
14:20
Speaker 3: was like marinating like a human tea bag in the shower,
14:24
Speaker 3: and that right.
14:25
Speaker 1: There is what we do. That is the type that
14:30
Speaker 1: we get.
14:31
Speaker 3: Helmet Man in the shower for ninety minutes, even though
14:34
Speaker 3: he'd said on the air's like I got to meet you.
14:36
Speaker 3: I want to meet you right in from the NFL network. Okay, fine,
14:39
Speaker 3: we'll do it.
14:40
Speaker 1: I'm actually on the live air. Yes you're on the.
14:45
Speaker 3: And there we were, so and listen. I would not
14:48
Speaker 3: trade this for anything.
14:49
Speaker 1: I love it.
14:49
Speaker 3: I have a great time with the people that are
14:52
Speaker 3: characters on the show, and.
14:53
Speaker 1: The fact that it's just real. It's just different, right,
14:57
Speaker 1: It's raw.
14:58
Speaker 3: It's the wild wild West of podcasting, populated by night
15:02
Speaker 3: shift workers and zombiacs, truck drivers, conspiracy theorists, loyal foot
15:07
Speaker 3: soldiers in the malord militia and beyond.
15:10
Speaker 1: And it's a.
15:10
Speaker 3: Little community, little community bonded not by the ratings, not
15:15
Speaker 3: by contract bonuses or even any raises at all, not
15:19
Speaker 3: by valet parking, not by being sent on trips on
15:23
Speaker 3: the company dime.
15:24
Speaker 1: No no, no, by shared chaos.
15:27
Speaker 3: The daytime guys they get all the gadgets and the
15:30
Speaker 3: gizmos and the dew hickeys, and they get their ass
15:32
Speaker 3: kissed and all that stuff. But we have recurring characters
15:37
Speaker 3: who disappear for ninety minutes or longer to take a shower.
15:42
Speaker 3: You'd think this would be the cleanest person in the world.
15:44
Speaker 1: It's not.
15:45
Speaker 3: And somewhere in all of this madness, a new holiday
15:49
Speaker 3: tradition was born. Forget the hottest gadget, forget the AI toaster,
15:55
Speaker 3: forget whatever the tech people in.
15:59
Speaker 1: Northern California are selling you this week.
16:01
Speaker 3: The hottest gift for kids this Christmas, Sitting proudly atop
16:06
Speaker 3: Santa's wish list is Where's Waldo two point zero?
16:09
Speaker 1: The helmet Man addition.
16:12
Speaker 3: Now it's the same premise, all right, the same premise,
16:15
Speaker 3: but it's a much tougher game. Instead of a striped shirt.
16:18
Speaker 3: Instead of striped shirt. You're searching for a roaming Baltimore
16:22
Speaker 3: sports logo like an oriole hat or a raven ad
16:27
Speaker 3: something along night along those lines. Who may or may
16:31
Speaker 3: not be wearing a full uniform, you never know, and
16:35
Speaker 3: may or may not be selling quote authentic memorabilia, and
16:38
Speaker 3: may or may not be stuck in the shower while
16:42
Speaker 3: the rest of the world is at the stadium. So
16:44
Speaker 3: the difficulty level on the new game here, Where's Waldo?
16:50
Speaker 3: The two point zero the Helmet Man Edition? The difficulty
16:54
Speaker 3: level is extreme, The odds are long, the payoff pure
16:57
Speaker 3: overnight radio bliss underpast the chanting hot dog vendors, hot Dog,
17:03
Speaker 3: hot Dog, hot Dog, hot Dog. You dodge dumpster divers,
17:07
Speaker 3: You circle NFL Network like a detective under flickering lights,
17:12
Speaker 3: and just when you think you've lost the phone rings,
17:18
Speaker 3: it's helmet Man. He wasn't there, he was never there,
17:22
Speaker 3: but somehow he still wins.
17:24
Speaker 1: See that is overnight.
17:26
Speaker 3: Radio in a nutshell, a world that again, the daytime
17:30
Speaker 3: guys will just never understand. They don't get it. And
17:33
Speaker 3: where's helmet Man exactly? That's the point. Where is Helmet Man?
17:40
Speaker 1: All right? Now turning the page on that I was.
17:43
Speaker 3: I didn't want to mention this story because we talk
17:45
Speaker 3: about the life of Mather, a life of.
17:47
Speaker 1: Danny g when Danny joins us every once in a while.
17:49
Speaker 3: But I was summoned. I was summoned to the Inland Empire.
17:54
Speaker 3: If you're not familiar with the geography of southern California,
17:58
Speaker 3: it's called the Inland Empire for a reason. You spend
18:01
Speaker 3: about five hours in traffic to get there. So this
18:04
Speaker 3: was last weekend, and I was not subpoened. Normally people
18:08
Speaker 3: go to that part of town because you're subpoened. I
18:11
Speaker 3: wasn't extradited. I was requested. And there's a difference between
18:15
Speaker 3: being subpoened, extradited, and requested. When your presence is requested
18:21
Speaker 3: for a concert featuring the OJS, the Commodores and Sister Sledge,
18:28
Speaker 3: you don't ask any follow up questions, You don't check
18:32
Speaker 3: the weather.
18:33
Speaker 1: You just hop in the malamobile.
18:35
Speaker 3: You load up the wife and your caravan, and you
18:38
Speaker 3: get out there and meet a bunch of her coworkers,
18:41
Speaker 3: and you point yourself towards Ontario like you're chasing the
18:46
Speaker 3: final clue in a late night scavenger hunt. So the
18:50
Speaker 3: marketing copy that I was given for this shindig promised
18:54
Speaker 3: timeless hits, unforgettable music, which is always interesting phrasing.
19:00
Speaker 1: I always interesting.
19:01
Speaker 3: Phrasing because if something is truly timeless, if I have
19:06
Speaker 3: somebody's timeless, it technically shouldn't need to be remembered. It
19:11
Speaker 3: should just exist, like gravity, for example, or Costco's rotisserie chickens.
19:18
Speaker 3: They just exist. There's no rhyme or reason. They just
19:22
Speaker 3: happen to exist. And if you're new to the mal
19:24
Speaker 3: Ard militia or relatively new, here's the thing about me
19:29
Speaker 3: and music. I was not born with the music gene.
19:34
Speaker 3: I am deficient in the music gene. I like music.
19:38
Speaker 3: I listen to music, however, it's mostly like wallpaper. It
19:43
Speaker 3: kind of fills up space. I respond to rhythm, to
19:48
Speaker 3: the beat, to the vibe. I respond to that. Lyrics
19:51
Speaker 3: are often just syllables writing shotgun and a lot of
19:57
Speaker 3: people in my life love the lyrics and they love
20:00
Speaker 3: to remember the lyrics. With rare exceptions, I don't. Johnny Cash,
20:03
Speaker 3: for example, would be one the man in Black. I
20:07
Speaker 3: hear words that he says and I just know the lyrics.
20:11
Speaker 3: I feel like I'm being told the story, not just
20:15
Speaker 3: a nudge into the mood. So again, walking into this
20:20
Speaker 3: concert hall, it felt like an odd juxtaposition. It did,
20:26
Speaker 3: because there are groups whose songs I have referenced.
20:31
Speaker 1: These groups, are you know?
20:32
Speaker 3: I've referenced these songs regularly over the years on the
20:36
Speaker 3: radio show, but mostly as linguistic tools. If you haven't
20:41
Speaker 3: figured out by now, and I'm putting together a monologue,
20:43
Speaker 3: I put bullet points together. But one of the things
20:46
Speaker 3: I like to do is spice it up a little
20:47
Speaker 3: Kayenne Pepper and their little Hallapano. And so something strange happened.
20:52
Speaker 3: As I was settling into my seat to watch all
20:56
Speaker 3: of these old school groups get together.
20:58
Speaker 1: It hit me.
21:00
Speaker 3: That not emotionally like a Pixar moment. It wasn't one
21:04
Speaker 3: of those things, not intellectually like realizing you've been unknowingly
21:10
Speaker 3: speaking these tunes your entire life. I was there for nostalgia.
21:15
Speaker 3: I was there for I guess recognition. I don't know
21:19
Speaker 3: if that's the right word. But for example, take the Commodores,
21:23
Speaker 3: and that is a group it was very popular million
21:26
Speaker 3: years ago. I have used brick House forever. A team
21:32
Speaker 3: does not shoot the ball well on a given night
21:34
Speaker 3: in the NBA.
21:35
Speaker 1: They are a break house.
21:38
Speaker 3: I've done that, a team clanking jumpers like they've been
21:42
Speaker 3: sponsored by a home depot, brick house. And they have
21:47
Speaker 3: another song, the Commodore's Night Shift. Now that's not just
21:51
Speaker 3: a song, that is a that's kind of the soundtrack
21:55
Speaker 3: of my life. That that's me driving through the north
21:58
Speaker 3: Woods at three forty in the morning, whatever it might be,
22:00
Speaker 3: living life on vampire hours, doing radio while the rest
22:05
Speaker 3: of the world snores. Some even call up to snore,
22:09
Speaker 3: like hollering James. So I didn't learn those things. I
22:16
Speaker 3: absorbed them and they became part of my language. Same
22:20
Speaker 3: for the Ojs. Not that oj he's dead, but the Ojays,
22:24
Speaker 3: another old school group. They came up with the tune
22:27
Speaker 3: love Train True True, and that is a recurring bit.
22:31
Speaker 3: We talk about Travis Kelcey and Taylor Swift. They're on
22:34
Speaker 3: the love train. True Yeah, I love train pulling into
22:38
Speaker 3: the station, a locker room romance.
22:41
Speaker 1: All of the above and sunshine.
22:44
Speaker 3: That's the sonic equivalent of saying a team had good vibes,
22:50
Speaker 3: good juju, solar powered optimism, and you don't analyze it,
22:56
Speaker 3: you just kind of deployed. Then there is cis Sledge
23:01
Speaker 3: now Price, I don't care about Sisters Sledge. I don't
23:03
Speaker 3: even know what that is. Well, one of their songs
23:06
Speaker 3: was amazing back in the day. It was that we
23:10
Speaker 3: are familyite, we are family Now. I have used that
23:14
Speaker 3: phrase so many times it might as well be stamped
23:16
Speaker 3: on my forehead. And teams who are really clicking, like
23:20
Speaker 3: Oklahoma City, Oklahoma State really clicking for the most part.
23:24
Speaker 1: Right.
23:26
Speaker 3: The word that people love to use because there's no
23:28
Speaker 3: way to debunk it is chemistry and that and so
23:33
Speaker 3: we are family not just a song. It's a shorthanded cohesion.
23:39
Speaker 1: It's for harmony, for vibes, all that.
23:42
Speaker 3: And yes, it was in the late nineteen seventies the
23:47
Speaker 3: soundtrack for the Pittsburg Pirates the Buckos, which means it lives.
23:53
Speaker 3: It does live at the intersection of sports, music and mythology.
23:57
Speaker 1: The late great Dave Parker.
24:00
Speaker 3: Parker was part of this podcast and was part of
24:03
Speaker 3: the Pirates in the late nineteen seventies and all that stuff.
24:07
Speaker 3: So listen, that matters. Context matters as well. And here's
24:11
Speaker 3: the fun fact that grounded the whole week. And I
24:16
Speaker 3: love I love this because I was like, I was
24:18
Speaker 3: like well, these guys are all.
24:19
Speaker 1: New members of the Commodorees and the ojs.
24:21
Speaker 3: Well not so fast, my friend, This guy, William King,
24:24
Speaker 3: the trumpet player and co founder of the Commodores, happened
24:28
Speaker 3: to be there and happened to be performing the only
24:32
Speaker 3: original founding members still performing since the nineteen sixties. That
24:37
Speaker 3: is not nostalgia. That is con continuity or whatever the
24:40
Speaker 3: word is. And he's like, guy's like a living artifact,
24:44
Speaker 3: is what I'm trying to say. It's like seeing a
24:46
Speaker 3: handwritten copy of the Constitution. And my goodness, and suddenly
24:53
Speaker 3: I realized something somewhat upset, upsettling or unsettling, I should
24:58
Speaker 3: say unsettling.
24:59
Speaker 1: That these songs phones were not just background music.
25:03
Speaker 3: It was really again I go back to the point
25:05
Speaker 3: I made, It was infrastructure that they have shaped so
25:10
Speaker 3: much of.
25:11
Speaker 1: How I have talked.
25:11
Speaker 3: And again I'm not the biggest music guy and all
25:13
Speaker 3: that stuff, but how I frame monologues, how I explain
25:17
Speaker 3: sports to people who don't really like sports, and I
25:21
Speaker 3: try to mix in different references to keep people engaged
25:25
Speaker 3: that aren't sports people. And I've been using those tracks
25:29
Speaker 3: the way a philosopher uses a metaphor, a comedian used
25:34
Speaker 3: callbacks and all that stuff. It's just part of the
25:35
Speaker 3: operating system. So I didn't go out to the ie
25:39
Speaker 3: as they call it.
25:40
Speaker 1: I went there.
25:42
Speaker 3: I didn't go there to rediscover music. I just went
25:45
Speaker 3: out there and realized that I have been unknowingly carrying
25:50
Speaker 3: these tunes in my head for some time. And the
25:53
Speaker 3: groups were all great. It was a lot of fun. So, yeah,
25:56
Speaker 3: I still don't have the music gene. I don't want
26:00
Speaker 3: you well know you're a music guy, but no I'm not.
26:02
Speaker 3: I still don't have the music gene. I probably never
26:05
Speaker 3: will at this point. But standing there in Ontario, surrounded
26:09
Speaker 3: by songs and groups that I'd kind of heard of
26:12
Speaker 3: in the past, I was like, oh, that's pretty cool.
26:16
Speaker 3: That's pretty And so sometimes the soundtrack isn't there to
26:20
Speaker 3: move you, it's there to explain you. And that's not nostalgia.
26:24
Speaker 3: That's the love train you're always having, you know, always
26:29
Speaker 3: always having that available to you.
26:32
Speaker 1: And I guess it's left the station and all that stuff,
26:34
Speaker 1: and there you go.
26:37
Speaker 3: So that was my weekend a week ago, as we
26:40
Speaker 3: had a grand old time with a couple of old groups,
26:46
Speaker 3: the OJ's and the Commodorees and sister Sledge.
26:49
Speaker 1: And and all that time. Now though for the phrase
26:53
Speaker 1: of the week.
26:55
Speaker 3: That's right, the phrase of the week, and this from
26:59
Speaker 3: Scott in Florida. He says, what about the phrase rules
27:03
Speaker 3: are made to be broken? Okay, well that's a magical moment. Now,
27:09
Speaker 3: this phrase is very old, very old. It was popularized
27:15
Speaker 3: by war hero General Douglas MacArthur. General Douglas MacArthur famously
27:22
Speaker 3: said rules are mostly made to be broken and are
27:26
Speaker 3: too often for the lazy to hide behind. And so
27:31
Speaker 3: that was that that quote, which is not even one
27:35
Speaker 3: hundred years old, that goes back to like the nineteen
27:38
Speaker 3: fifties MacArthur, General MacArthur popularized the phrase. However, it was
27:42
Speaker 3: already present in the proverbs of the time.
27:47
Speaker 1: It wasn't new.
27:48
Speaker 3: The sentiment is older than any single source, and so
27:53
Speaker 3: I tried to find exactly who did they credit General
27:57
Speaker 3: MacArthur for the modern use of the phrase.
28:01
Speaker 1: For the modern usage, and it's.
28:03
Speaker 3: Seen as a rebellious like a justification for bending the
28:10
Speaker 3: rules and going full cheating astro.
28:15
Speaker 1: Now it's not just General MacArthur.
28:17
Speaker 3: Sam Walton, the founder of the Walmart chain, which has
28:23
Speaker 3: become the largest for like twenty years. It's the largest
28:27
Speaker 3: corporation in the world, just massive, and so. Sam Walton,
28:33
Speaker 3: in his autobiography wrote that the most important rule in
28:37
Speaker 3: business is to break all of the rules. He also
28:41
Speaker 3: gave a preference to rule breakers when hiring employees, as
28:45
Speaker 3: he considered them a superior worker for not just following
28:52
Speaker 3: and doing the bare minimum, going above and beyond the
28:55
Speaker 3: bare minimum. And many of the greatest scientists, many of
29:01
Speaker 3: the greatest inventors engineers of American history also known as
29:07
Speaker 3: rule breakers. Yeah, I know Henry Ford with his moving
29:14
Speaker 3: assembly line and the welfare capitalism. The Wright brothers with
29:19
Speaker 3: their fixed wing aircraft are a couple of examples of that,
29:23
Speaker 3: where you know, sometimes you need to bend rules. Now
29:27
Speaker 3: there are gray areas, what the astros.
29:32
Speaker 1: Did is not a gray area. They're dirty dolls, dirty
29:35
Speaker 1: dirty dort dorty dolls.
29:36
Speaker 3: So the phrase of the week again, rules are made
29:39
Speaker 3: to be broken, which the modern usage is credited to
29:43
Speaker 3: General Douglas MacArthur. However, it goes way back before that,
29:47
Speaker 3: way back. There's no one person that is being credited
29:53
Speaker 3: because it goes a million.
29:56
Speaker 1: Years back in time. All right, we'll get out on that.
29:58
Speaker 3: Have a wonderful st enjoy whatever you're up to today
30:03
Speaker 3: and Daniel joined me for the Mailbag on Sunday on
30:06
Speaker 3: that edition of the podcast, Have a Wonderful Saturday to
30:10
Speaker 3: be part of God.
30:11
Speaker 1: What's it been about the Wizard about Folation