Latest / Soul Salon with Ayandastood / 68: this quote on fear changed me forever ✨
Transcript
- 0:00Hello divine being. I want to share something with you. That is so juicy. Like I cannot, I cannot stop
- 0:06thinking about it like babes. I need to share it with you. I love finding magnificent things that
- 0:11deepen our consciousness and sharing them with you. Like that's one of my deepest purposes on
- 0:15earth is literally to do that. But I found this lyric of a song that I cannot stop. It changed me.
- 0:21There's a before and after. But before I tell you what that is, first I just want to remind you
- 0:25you are divine. Like I know you've been manifesting. I know you've been visioning. You've
- 0:29been dreaming. But I just want to remind you babes as you vision, as you dream, as you plan,
- 0:34that just as you are manifesting, you are a manifestation. Just as you're envisioning,
- 0:39you are the vision. Just as you are creating, you are a co-creation of this divine earth. And so I
- 0:44just want you to remember that there is prophecy in your being. There is prophecy in your being,
- 0:52in just your energy. In the way that you experience life, there is so much cosmic magic. And I
- 0:58don't want you to forget, as you're mapping out your dream reality, dream life, dream relationship,
- 1:03dream service, dream money, dream abundance, dream giving from like your soul, and also dream
- 1:07receiving. Because are you not also here to receive? Yes. I just want to remind you babes,
- 1:11like it's so easy to forget that you, from the perspective of the universe, of the cosmos,
- 1:18you were manifested. Just as a vision can seem impossible, the fact that you are here,
- 1:23and the beauty of your being, of your essence, the power of your spirit, of the way that you
- 1:29experience this life, it is so powerful and actually from accepting that divine self worth,
- 1:35because we know love is the highest frequency. When you start to see yourself as a reflection of love,
- 1:40as love itself, you're going to attract more love to you. So I just want to remind you of that
- 1:45babes because I know it can be easy in this paradigm to forget. Like you're out of this world,
- 1:49you're otherworldly. So I wanted to remind you that because I know that I forget that sometimes,
- 1:53I know that when I create things, sometimes I'm so stuck in what's wrong with them or what's
- 1:57wrong with me, and there's that shame that feels like it will never go away. Oh my goodness.
- 2:03But you know what babes? You're a healer, you're a dreamer, you're a feeler. And so welcome to
- 2:07the soul salon. If you haven't been here before, this is a space for loving creation,
- 2:12for stepping into power, purpose, service, and also abundance, giving deeply generously,
- 2:18but also receiving, co-creating with the divine, with the earth, with the collective,
- 2:23understanding that all creation is co-creation. So I'm getting the vibe that you're stepping into
- 2:29being seen more. You're recognizing that a lot of your dreams and desires are actually not that far
- 2:34away. Like the book you want to write or the podcast you want to start or grow or the opportunities
- 2:40you see other people receiving and you're like, I really could do that. Like I really,
- 2:44I see myself doing what they're doing. I see myself speaking at the events they're speaking at,
- 2:48hosting the kinds of events, conferences, retreats that they're hosting or being in the studios
- 2:53that they're in or being the leader that they are. Like I see this for myself because you've raised
- 2:57your vibration, you've raised your sense of what's possible. But one thing that can stop you,
- 3:01even as you accept in theory, you want to be more seen, is this practical embodied fear and shame
- 3:07around visibility. So I'm really here to support you on this, to support you with visibility,
- 3:12as well as creativity because they're one, they're like interconnected because the more
- 3:16full we are of our creative juices, the more they will overflow from us, that is why it is so
- 3:21pleasurable to watch someone perform. Like who is a performer, like a singer or dancer, they are so
- 3:26full of their craft that it oozes out of them. In fact, it's kind of like an orgasm if you think
- 3:30about it. They're so, they're erupting by braiding just gushing with this energy of creation. And it's
- 3:36all those hours they put in private, not only into their craft, but into the self-love, they needed
- 3:40to devote themselves to that craft that allowed them to show up in that way. And I am here to support
- 3:45you on that exact journey that I just laid out. I believe we only rise rooted. So it's so important
- 3:51to root yourself in self-love, in ritual and practice, in whatever grounds you in connection and
- 3:56community. So that from that rooted place, the fruits can grow. The fruits don't grow from the top.
- 4:01Like oh, I just want more fruits. But babes, what about what's happening underground? What about that?
- 4:05Okay, anyway, so yes, one of the things I can stop you on this path on this journey is the fear
- 4:10of being seen. The fear of being visible. The fear of being exposed. Oh my goodness. What are they
- 4:16going to say? The fear of being perceived, often not by people you don't know, but by people who do
- 4:21know you and they know you in one fixed role. And now you're stepping into another role. That's
- 4:25scary. That's terrifying. There's this concept called the shame of becoming. It's a psychological
- 4:30concept, which is basically, we're not ashamed to be what we ultimately seek being. So let's say
- 4:34you dream of being a YouTuber, you're not ashamed to become that dream YouTuber that you're
- 4:39envisioning. You're ashamed to be seen trying to become that in the process of cracking open,
- 4:44like from an egg into the next form of life. We know that this is a part of nature. We left the
- 4:48womb. We became a baby. We grew from that like this metamorphosis shedding, cracking,
- 4:54molting. It's a part of nature and it's transformational and it's painful at times. So I just want to
- 4:59hold so much love for you. Like the fear of being seen, it's real. It's real. And it shows up once
- 5:03you pull that thread, you'll notice it in so many different ways. Let me give you an example
- 5:06through my whole life. Ah, I have struggled with eye contact. Oh, my word eye contact. Like I
- 5:13don't understand how you all looking each other in the eyes. Like I feel so perceived. I'm like,
- 5:18oh, my word, like this is so intense. I'll be looking there, there, there and everywhere. And it's
- 5:22actually so funny the way that healing works because when we have a message that calls to us,
- 5:27the message will initiate us into a process to actually embody the message. So I've been teaching
- 5:33on the fear of being seen. And as part of that, I've actually had to heal so much around my own
- 5:38fear of being seen, not to say I'm finished with that because there are so many levels to this.
- 5:43There's so many fears. And also fear being seen is so connected to our aliveness as a collective
- 5:48as species. So I've had to grow my own awareness of where I'm not showing up as that. And one of the
- 5:54areas is eye contact. I really struggle to make eye contact. It's only in the past literally
- 5:58like couple of months that I actually improved at this after 29 years of not looking people in the eye.
- 6:05And my therapist just the other day was like, girl, you're looking at me in the eye. Like even on Zoom,
- 6:09I'll be like, so right. And I'm a creativity guy. Do whatever you want to call it. Actually,
- 6:16they're like, girl, what do you call it? Because this is so much fun on my word. Okay, so I have to
- 6:22look my clients in the eye. I get to. They're so wonderful and magical. And so are you? Okay,
- 6:27so I know it's been a long time. I know you're ready to hear this quote that I found for you.
- 6:32And as I said, there's a before and after of hearing this and reframing my understanding of what fear
- 6:39is. We all have fear. I gave a whole master class on this creative fear of starting,
- 6:45fear of failing, fear of being seen, fear of not being seen. Because let's talk about that. It's
- 6:49the same fear. The fear of everyone showing up is also the fear of no one showing up. Fear of being
- 6:54judged, misunderstood, fear of losing everything, fear of not trying, fear of trying,
- 7:00fear of being too old, fear of being too inexperienced, fear of being bullied or being criticized,
- 7:04fear of old traumas being reenacted. Okay, so many different fears, fear of not being good enough,
- 7:10fear of not being enough, you know, perfectionism is that fear. So I was minding my business,
- 7:16listening to music, and this one song started playing. And I didn't think much of it until I heard
- 7:22this quote that completely changed me. And it's that feeling of resonance and an epiphany where
- 7:28something is so deeply true that you feel it literally in your whole body. Like I had the tingles.
- 7:34And what that quote is, and I literally wrote it on a whiteboard because I believe in it so strongly.
- 7:38And I'll show it to you in a second. Whew, I just need to is fear is courage waiting to become known.
- 7:52Fear is courage waiting to become known. Fear is courage waiting to become known. I just have to like
- 8:04I don't know if I'm actually giving the weight of these words justice. Like how do I make it
- 8:08like make sense? And this is the most powerful thing ever. Fear is courage waiting to become known.
- 8:12Can we hear the alchemy and babes you're an alchemist or my word the things you've
- 8:15alchemized in your lifetime and in your lineage? It's actually profound. It's astounding. It's
- 8:18amazing. But can we talk about the alchemy of the sentence? It's saying we're going to break this
- 8:23down so slowly, babe. So don't worry by the end. I know the shift is going to be in there in
- 8:27there where it belongs. Okay, let's have the whiteboard help us. Okay, oh, and to be wonderfully
- 8:34loving to the artist, the artist's name is Savannah. I have it right. I have it right here. And the song
- 8:39is called she moves me and will absolutely be in the show notes, babe. So you can go check it out,
- 8:44it changed me. Thank you, Savannah. Thank you. You really have done the Lord's work. Like
- 8:49and this is also why visibility matters. Imagine Savannah was like, oh my god, the song is not
- 8:53good enough. Would I have been moved? Would I have been changed? And it's exactly the same for you,
- 8:56babe. It's like we changed each other's lives by being generous with our craft. Oh,
- 9:00my word. Like Savannah has doubts. I don't know who Savannah is, but Savannah has doubts. But it's
- 9:04what she chose to do in the face of those doubts. And that's exactly what this quote is also speaking
- 9:09to. Fear is courage waiting to become known. Instead of me explaining this from my experience,
- 9:14let's just talk about yours. I invite you to consider something you were so afraid that would
- 9:20happen that actually ended up showing you how courageous you are. Maybe you always feared moving
- 9:34from your town, but you actually always desired it as well. And you thought, how am I ever going
- 9:39to make friends? How am I ever going to survive far from my family? How am I ever going to make
- 9:43this work? And then your fear became a courage that you did not yet know you had. Maybe you're
- 9:50afraid to leave a relationship. And you thought, how on earth am I going to have this difficult
- 9:54conversation? How am I going to advocate for myself? What might go wrong? And then you said the
- 9:59words, even if your voice shook, even if your voice shook, even if you could not stop crying,
- 10:04you said the words fear became a courage that was waiting to become known. Maybe you have a project
- 10:10that you've been dreaming of for years, you've been dreaming and dreaming of writing more,
- 10:14you've been dreaming of speaking at a spoken poetry event. And you thought to yourself,
- 10:18my heart's going to literally beat until it just stops. It's going to race and accelerate
- 10:23into the earth, into the ether, where it already is because you're divine and magnificent. So
- 10:27then it's like, oh, my word, I spoke on that stage. And then the feeling of power afterwards
- 10:32of like, oh, my God, like what else am I holding myself back from? So again, fear is courage
- 10:38waiting to become known in my own experience. I genuinely, it's so funny that this quote came
- 10:44through to me because I realized like in the past six months, I was like, how is it that I'm still
- 10:49afraid of being seen? How is it that I'm still afraid creatively? I still have creative fears?
- 10:56How is that possible? It's like, you know, the ego is like, I've already healed from this. I want
- 11:00to move on. Let's move on to greener postures. And it's not how it works. Healing is a spiral.
- 11:05So we don't really get over things, but we do evolve and we do gain more awareness, which is
- 11:09beautiful. And I feel you've been doing that a lot. But you've also been accepting that some of
- 11:13these wounds, they're wounds, you know, they don't just vanish and they're part of what makes you
- 11:18you. But also, also, what I realized in the past six months is that the reason I feel afraid
- 11:25creatively is because I'm here to embody courage. And if I wasn't afraid, how could I ever be courageous?
- 11:32So my soul said, oh, you're here to be a courageous woman. So we're going to make sure you face the
- 11:39fire of fear again and again, whether it's recording a video, creating something that feels vulnerable,
- 11:44scary, having an idea, launching an offer, whatever it may be, many other things. But creation can
- 11:50scare me. And it's like, oh, it's because you've come here to be a courageous creator. So in every
- 11:55instance, where I've been afraid before posting something, even my last video, I was like, oh,
- 11:59my word, I'm so afraid. Like, oh, my God, this is so scary. And I was like, oh, because you're
- 12:04meant to be courageous. So when I posted it, it's like, oh, the fear alchemized itself into courage.
- 12:10But actually what this is saying is not fear becomes courage when we act. It's that fears almost
- 12:16like an earlier stage of courage that doesn't know yet what it fully is. Oh, my gosh.
- 12:25I love language sometimes. Like, wow, it's like the baby doesn't yet fully know. And please excuse me
- 12:32if you can't fully see the letters. I'm doing the best that I can. So it's like the baby, like a baby
- 12:38when you're an infant, you didn't fully know you were going to become an adult. Like you didn't
- 12:43look at your parents and think, I'm going to become that. You did not yet know what you would
- 12:47become. None of us really do. And so it's just as every sort of being is an earlier stage of a
- 12:53different form of that version, neither is wrong or right. Like fear is this earlier stage of courage
- 12:58that this transmutation process happens. And there are actually two faces of the exact same thing.
- 13:04So whatever you're afraid of my darling, my love is simply the form of courage you are here to
- 13:08embody. If you're afraid of sharing your spirituality, it's because you're here to embody the
- 13:14courage of stepping out of the spiritual closet and sharing your actual gifts and magic with the
- 13:19world and owning your truth, even if it's in language that for people in your community or
- 13:23family or friends or circle will feel threatening or they may even I've heard had clients who've
- 13:28told me that they've had members of their community. Like, what's that word? Fuck.
- 13:32Just own them. Yes, just own them. And so the the risks are real, but it's the courage that those
- 13:43people then embody. So if you're afraid to write a book about your experience, what if that fear is
- 13:48just waiting to become the courage that you do already possess to have that experience. And the
- 13:52best way to see the truth of this is to just assess your own experience of this human life and
- 13:57think about the moments where you could have sworn you could not handle something that you then
- 14:02ended up being courageous through. This is not to glorify suffering at all. I'm not celebrating
- 14:07it. I'm not saying oh, but look at the lessons we learned not at all. But I know you as a human being
- 14:12on this earth have had things that you thought you would not survive that you alchemized and that
- 14:19you showed yourself a level of strength and resilience. You did not even know you had. And so I
- 14:24think this really invites us to reframe the way we relate to fear, to become fear alchemists.
- 14:30Like to say, oh, wow, this fear actually just hasn't graduated into courage just yet.
- 14:37But that's what it will become if I follow it. And if you follow the fear my love, oh my word,
- 14:42you will be so powerful because the other face of the fear is also the desire. So if you own
- 14:48your desires, then you will also own the fear waiting to become courage of that desire. And what I
- 14:54like about this idea is becoming known. So what does this indicate? It's a deeper level of awareness.
- 14:59It's saying that when you're in the fearful state, there's something you're not conscious of
- 15:04within you. Knowing has this very deep spiritual connotation as well. It's about wisdom. It's about
- 15:10sight. Like what you see, it's about what you've come to awareness on. So fear is this less
- 15:17conscious version of courage. Courage knows itself. Courage knows it had to overcome something.
- 15:23But it's like the fear is this earlier, lower awareness like in the map of consciousness by David
- 15:29Hawkins, like this lower frequency, but you know, they all belong and fear keeps us alive and
- 15:34fear is sacred as well. But basically, like the fear does not yet fully know just how powerful it
- 15:40can be and can become. So the fear within you is a courage that's waiting to become known by you.
- 15:47What we're inviting you to do is actually recognize just how courageous you are so that you can
- 15:52bring that knowing, bring that awareness. And each time you face fear, whether it's fear of starting,
- 15:58fear of launching, fear of being seen, trying, fear of being judged, you say, Oh, wow, now I'm
- 16:03aware, like now I know this is actually just a courage that's waiting to become. And since your
- 16:08consciousness is the most profound, it's so deep, it's so rich, it's so complicated. We don't
- 16:14even understand what it is. So it is from that consciousness that anything is possible. Like you are
- 16:19an aspect of God, divine, earth, cosmos, like you're so profound. And so of course there are gifts
- 16:26within you that have not yet fully become known. And so I invite you to know this within yourself,
- 16:32know thyself, know thyself to be courageous, know thyself to be brave, know thyself to have more
- 16:37possibilities than what might seem immediately obvious. Because for example, because I work on the
- 16:41fear of being seen, sometimes the fear of recording, like it feels like someone's going to attack you,
- 16:47it's very scary or posting something and then seeing comments under it, you're like, what if
- 16:52this is the end? Like what if people say some things that are so hurtful that I just can't survive
- 16:56them. But then it's like, ah, okay, I'm afraid. And that fear is trying to become courage.
- 17:03It doesn't yet know what it could be. It's like that part of each of us are deeply underestimates
- 17:08itself. So my darling, my loves, I'm going to put this whiteboard down. How are you going to walk
- 17:14towards the fear knowing that it is courage in disguise, courage waiting to grow, waiting to grow
- 17:20more aware, more knowing, waiting to grow more understanding. How are you going to trust that just
- 17:26as you've been so resilient and alchemized so much, not only in your life, but you're healing
- 17:30your lineage babes, like you're doing work that you're the first person in your entire lineage
- 17:34to be able to do. So you are alchemizing so much that you've been given into more healing,
- 17:40more love, more understanding, more compassion. And it's really important to not underestimate
- 17:45yourself because your level of self worth has really been rising, right? And the more it rises,
- 17:50the more your sense of what is possible for you and through you will also rise. So when you
- 17:56are your courageous self, know that you become a beacon for all the rest of us because we also
- 18:02inspire courage within each of us. When we see someone being courageous, we become more courageous.
- 18:07It is infectious. So what if fear is courage waiting to become known also means that
- 18:14when we see people who are being courageous, it's almost like part of us recognizes that they're
- 18:24just at a latest stage of their evolution than us. And we need to integrate what we're seeing
- 18:29within them and recognize it within us. So for example, sometimes when we admire someone,
- 18:34we put a lot of distance between us and them like we put them on this huge pedestal. And it's like
- 18:38what if their courage is just a more grown up version of the fear we feel within ourselves. And
- 18:46now those two are actually coming together, connecting, knowing each other in a deeper way.
- 18:50Okay, let's just allow that. That doesn't fully make sense. And we just have to allow that
- 18:54sometimes that sometimes that's just part of the vibe. You know, you say things, you don't even
- 18:58fully know what they mean. And then you just allow the collective to sit with it and allow the
- 19:02dialogue to continue. So I love you so much. My darling, you are so profound, so magnificent,
- 19:06so divine. You are here for a reason, actually many, several plenty. And I just never want you
- 19:11to forget that through you, we all get to become more of what we are seeking to become. We get to
- 19:18become more healed. I was thinking about how I recently heard on this podcast, this doctor was
- 19:23explaining how a fever is not actually the illness of fever is your body trying to burn out the
- 19:28infection from your body. I was like, oh my god, what? Like, wow, I just never thought about it that
- 19:32way, but that is the way that it should be thought about. But anyways, I thought about the way
- 19:36that we are all here is healers within the collective body to metabolize, to purify, to grow, to heal,
- 19:44to enrich, to nourish different parts of the collective body. Some people do that through their
- 19:50music. Some people do that through their words, their languages, this bomb on the collective spirit.
- 19:55But what I truly believe is how can we heal as a giant collective body if all the healers within
- 20:02that body are not stepping into the power and purpose of their healing capabilities? You bring
- 20:07something so magical and it's like, will you allow yourself to be seen in that so that the
- 20:12collective can heal through the particular medicine of your voice, of your gifts, of your
- 20:17magic, which is really our magic, our gifts, because it's all one. And yet we are not in harmony
- 20:24when we hide from the gifts we are naturally here to share. And I feel you're already stepping
- 20:30into that truth like you are here to offer something, to the collective spirit, to be a bomb,
- 20:36to be nourishment, to be a medicine. And your particular medicine deserves to be seen.
- 20:42It deserves to be felt because actually being seen as the portal to being felt. Oh my gosh,
- 20:47just dropping gems. Haha. Being seen as the portal to being felt. It's not really about, it's so
- 20:53funny. We're very visual beings generally as a collective and visual can also be metaphorically
- 20:58speaking. We see visions. We see possibilities. But also it's not really about the visibility.
- 21:04It's about what that visibility is a portal towards. So you may see me, but is it about you seeing me
- 21:10or is it about you feeling healing, growing, understanding. And so your own words don't want to impose
- 21:17anything on you or anything through me, through the me that is you, through our shared vibration
- 21:22and values and understandings. And so with that, know that you are here to be seen in your gifts.
- 21:28And your gifts are here to be seen in themselves through you. So let's vibe my love.
- 21:35Like the stars, the trees, the moon, you deserve to be celebrated, witnessed, loved as you are today,
- 21:40not after you read that book, not after you do that course, not after you do that research. Babes
- 21:44today, what you have to say is enough, what you have to create is enough, what you have to offer
- 21:48is enough, what you have to sell is enough in a soulful way. What you have to share is enough
- 21:52as it is today. Nothing needs to be added, okay? Because you are divine. What is different between you
- 21:57and the rivers and the trees and the mountains? What is different between you and the stars? What is
- 22:01different between you and the most divine intelligence? It's all one. And so let's vibe my darling. Let's
- 22:07vibe fear is courage waiting to become known. Thank you again to the artist Savannah. Her song again
- 22:12is called She Moves Me and these lyrics will forever change me. And I'm so grateful that I got
- 22:20to share them with you. Thank you for being here. Thank you for being a soul sibling. Thank you
- 22:25for being within the soul salon. You may leave, but it will never leave you unless you wanted to.
- 22:30Then they know it will go away. But I'm just so grateful to be able to do this. I feel energized.
- 22:35I feel excited. And it's really, I've been reconnecting with how blissful creativity gets to be.
- 22:41Okay, I love you so much. My darling, my love, my angel. And I will see you on the next
- 22:45soul session. Stick around, peek around. And I'm sending you so much love. You are resilient,
- 22:50powerful. You can face this fear. It is courage waiting to become known through you and by you
- 22:56and for you. So we're so grateful for this work you're doing because it has loving ripples across
- 23:02the collective. The more you step into healing, power, purpose, service, the more we all get to
- 23:08heal through you, feel through you grow, delight, be blissful through your being and your essence.
- 23:14I do have a free ebook called The Soulful Visibility Guide that is here to support you on your fear
- 23:20being seen. I'm receiving such beautiful emails and notes about people's experience of this ebook
- 23:25and also the playlist included within it with hand picked high frequency loving songs,
- 23:30a loving vibration. In fact, I listened to it right before I recorded this soul session to get
- 23:35into this frequency because I was in self doubt and I was like, we're not going to do that. We're
- 23:39not going to do that. Fear is courage waiting to become known. Okay. So I hope that this supports you.
- 23:43You can visit my website. I understood.com. And that's where you can pick up your free copy of
- 23:48The Soulful Visibility Guide. I'm sending you all the love in the world because you are love. So
- 23:53I'm literally just sending a frequency of yourself. How does it feel? Does it feel good? Yes, that's how
- 23:57it is to witness you. Okay. That's how it will be. That's how it is. And so it is. Love you. I'll see
- 24:02you on the next soul session. Love you. Bye. My darling, my love, my soul sibling. Thank you for
- 24:09stepping into the soul salon. If you are still hearing or watching this, we are soul siblings.
- 24:14We are resonating on the same frequency. And so something you may struggle with that I struggle
- 24:19with is the fear of being seen. You know that visibility is involved in you living your creative
- 24:25purpose and being in your power, serving the collective through your gifts, through your magic,
- 24:31through your medicine. In order to do that, you know you need to be more seen than you are allowing
- 24:36yourself to be right now. I have a gift just for you. Hard made for us on this frequency. And it is
- 24:44a free ebook called The Soulful Visibility Guide. That is soulful visibility. Like we don't just want
- 24:50to be seen. We want to be felt. We want to be heard. We want to move and be moved. So I do have a
- 24:56free gift for you. And all you need to do is go to my website. I understood.com. And there you will
- 25:02be able to input your email address and receive this directly to your inbox. This is such a juicy
- 25:09and delicious guide. And I change the free offering every few months. So you know, get it while you
- 25:15can. All the links are in the show notes. So thank you so much. I love you. And I will see you
- 25:19on the next sole session. Okay. I love you. Bye.