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THE CURIOUS GIRL DIARIES - LAYLA LONDON COMES TO THE MIC · CALL ME MISTRESS

• 0:25
  All right. Hi, welcome to the latest
• 0:28
  episode of Call Me a Mistress. I'm your Hostess, Mistress Mia,
• 0:31
  and today I have a very, very special guest.
• 0:34
  She has a lovely podcast and of course it's sexual based and it
• 0:39
  is The Curious Girl Diaries. And I welcome today, of course,
• 0:44
  the one and only Layla London. How are you?
• 0:48
  I am doing great. Thank you Mistress Mia for
• 0:51
  having me on. I'm super excited.
• 0:54
  I love it. You know, for obvious reasons.
• 0:59
  Like we have discussed, you are very anonymous.
• 1:03
  Yes. So people don't know, but you
• 1:05
  are very beautiful. I'm going to compliment you.
• 1:09
  So they're, they're missing out. They're missing.
• 1:13
  Out well, you know what I thank you for that that's I appreciate
• 1:17
  that that's true and you are looking I I feel like I feel
• 1:22
  like a Schlampedinka. You are looking stunning for
• 1:25
  this interview. And I just rolled up and I was
• 1:28
  running late and I basically just looked like I just got out
• 1:30
  of the gym, which is true and. So this is.
• 1:34
  That's what if you can imagine I'm looking at Mistress Mia and
• 1:39
  her beautiful Lacy black lingerie.
• 1:43
  Your hair is perfect makeup's on point and then here I am so
• 1:48
  there is there it's a bit of a juxtaposition, but I, I, I, I
• 1:51
  can appreciate that both can be beautiful.
• 1:54
  We're. Natural beauties we don't have
• 1:56
  to. Work too hard at it.
• 1:57
  That's right. That's right.
• 1:59
  But yeah, I've been anonymous for this whole time.
• 2:03
  Yeah. So I've been, I'm in the 10th
• 2:05
  year of my podcast, The Curious Girl Diaries.
• 2:08
  The genesis of that was me not having sex for 3 1/2 years,
• 2:16
  completely celibate. I just kind of, you know, lost
• 2:19
  myself and working business and poked my head up one day and
• 2:24
  said, holy shit, what is going on?
• 2:26
  I nobody has touched me. I haven't even thought about
• 2:30
  going on a date or being with anybody and I'm wasting the
• 2:34
  pretty. So I am going to get out there
• 2:37
  and, you know, use it or lose it.
• 2:39
  And I just thought, you know, what would be fun for me since
• 2:42
  I'm kind of a business mind and I need in order for me to commit
• 2:46
  to something, I kind of have to make it raise the stakes a
• 2:50
  little bit and so and make it interesting.
• 2:53
  So what I did is I said, well, I, I'm going to, I'm going to
• 2:55
  commit that. I'm going to give myself a year
• 2:58
  and I'm going to explore my sexuality.
• 3:02
  I'm going to make a sex bucket list and I'm going to knock
• 3:05
  things off that list. And then I'm going to have a
• 3:07
  little podcast to document it for posterity's sake.
• 3:11
  Because I was really curious about now if I just try any and
• 3:16
  everything that's that I've ever found, you know, kind of
• 3:19
  naughty, kind of excited, but never thought I would or could
• 3:21
  do it. You know, I'm just going to put
• 3:23
  all those things down and at the end of it, like, you know,
• 3:26
  'cause these are taboo things like who am I becoming?
• 3:29
  You know, what is that going to make me?
• 3:31
  I was really, really curious about that.
• 3:33
  But again, the idea was I was just going to do that for one
• 3:36
  year. I was going to, that's why I was
• 3:38
  going to stay anonymous because at the end of that year I was
• 3:40
  going to pull the plug and slink into the background, never to be
• 3:44
  heard from again. What ended up happening was I
• 3:51
  explore my sexuality just flat out changed my life.
• 3:54
  I mean improved it in ways I can't even tell you it
• 3:58
  spiritually, emotionally, just knowing myself better as a human
• 4:02
  being. My love and attraction and
• 4:07
  desire for men has completely shifted in the, in the sense
• 4:11
  that I am more interested in understanding them and, you
• 4:17
  know, pleasing and that which leads to therefore wanting to
• 4:20
  please my partners more. I understand why relationships,
• 4:25
  certain relationships in the past didn't work, why they now,
• 4:29
  you know, like, why that great guy that had all these check,
• 4:32
  you know, like checked every box, like why couldn't I connect
• 4:35
  with him? What was missing, you know, and
• 4:37
  I really realized it was just really rooted in my sexuality
• 4:41
  and how I'm wired. And, you know, now I believe
• 4:45
  that I align and bring partners to me that I match with better
• 4:49
  because I know that stuff, you know, and I bring that to my
• 4:54
  experiences. And now I get to keep doing it.
• 4:57
  And what I realized is that my sexuality is something that I
• 5:00
  should always want to constantly keep investigating and stay
• 5:04
  playful and curious about. And I should want it to be
• 5:07
  growing and changing and evolving over time.
• 5:09
  And I think a lot of people fall into the trap of just, you know,
• 5:12
  they, they don't think of their sex life that way.
• 5:15
  You know, we, we give a lot of time and attention to all other
• 5:18
  aspects of our lives and then we'll end up ignoring this one
• 5:21
  really vital part. And then it starts affecting,
• 5:24
  you know, our primary relationship with whomever we're
• 5:27
  partnered with. And you know, that if that
• 5:29
  disintegrates, you know, then the shit just kind of starts to
• 5:32
  roll downhill. So.
• 5:35
  So this one little strange bizarro sexual experiment really
• 5:40
  turned into a whole lot more, and here I am.
• 5:42
  I'm in my 10th season. Yeah, I read that.
• 5:46
  And you know, after you got to that point, why did you get to 3
• 5:52
  1/2 years? Did you did you have a break up
• 5:54
  before? That no, I know it wasn't
• 5:57
  anything that, that that triggered it per SE.
• 6:04
  It was more just situational. I, I am a dominant woman out in,
• 6:09
  in the real world and I love business and I'm an entrepreneur
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  and I'm, I felt like I have been that way my whole life.
• 6:18
  And I'm just super, super ambitious.
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  And I got to a point in my business.
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  It, my business was at a point where the market was aligning
• 6:28
  with it. And I, it was just the time.
• 6:30
  It was like, do it was kind of like, this is the time, you
• 6:33
  know, this is the time to make a killing right now.
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  You're going to, if you don't stay in this and just go for it,
• 6:39
  you're, you're going to miss out.
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  And so, so I did. So I really was just devoted to
• 6:43
  my job, and that almost was like my lover, my work, you know, And
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  I didn't want anything or anybody that I thought the
• 6:50
  perception that they were taking time away from accomplishing
• 6:53
  that one goal that I had so prioritized, I didn't want
• 6:58
  anybody derailing me from that. So that's all it was, was just
• 7:02
  my workaholicism there myself. No judgement.
• 7:11
  It happens. It happens.
• 7:13
  You know, you did a podcast interview with someone, Doctor
• 7:18
  Darian, oh so long ago. Oh yeah, it was a while ago.
• 7:22
  It was a while ago, yeah. And you, you were asked what
• 7:27
  were a few things on your bucket list and you were just like, I
• 7:31
  don't really remember. I know I had just done like a
• 7:37
  brain fart. Like you could ask me that and I
• 7:38
  can tell you I've done so many episodes and the bucket list has
• 7:41
  evolved. But at that, at that time, you
• 7:44
  know, the basic things were I hadn't done a threesome, I
• 7:49
  hadn't gone to a sex club. I wanted to try BDSM at that
• 7:54
  point. I hadn't even tried it.
• 7:56
  So these were kind of like baby step things.
• 7:59
  And I think at that point I was so I felt like when I was
• 8:05
  interviewed with him, that might have been your two maybe.
• 8:09
  And so I had done a lot that first year.
• 8:12
  I just felt like I had grown in leaps and bounds and I was, he
• 8:15
  probably just caught me at a moment where I was like that.
• 8:18
  That stuff seemed like basic vanilla stuff at that point
• 8:21
  'cause I had kind of blown past it.
• 8:23
  But yeah, I, I've done a lot. I mean, just, you know, and
• 8:30
  everything you do, the cool part about when you start with a
• 8:32
  bucket list is what I tell people, you know, if you just
• 8:35
  even start with five things, you will from that experience that
• 8:41
  you go and and do it will open the door for it, probably give
• 8:46
  you 10 other ideas, 10 new things spring from that.
• 8:51
  So there's really never a shortage and the bucket list is
• 8:54
  always evolving. And even, you know, you and your
• 8:58
  listeners don't know. We just, I just interviewed you
• 9:02
  right before this for my show. And you know, you had told me
• 9:06
  about the, I don't even know what you call that little
• 9:08
  suctiony bed thing and with the tube and I, I was started out
• 9:13
  saying that's just no, there's no way.
• 9:15
  And then we started talking about I'm like, I think that
• 9:17
  sounds great. I better, I better sign up and
• 9:19
  to have a session, you know, you just find your way to things
• 9:23
  that you originally had some preconceived idea like no and
• 9:29
  doors open. It's really incredible.
• 9:32
  It really is. You know, we're both
• 9:35
  entrepreneurs on so many levels. I mean, I started off being a
• 9:39
  pimp. I know, I know.
• 9:41
  I was like, whoa, OK. I mean, no, but that's that's
• 9:44
  advanced level business thinking.
• 9:46
  You went right into the to the pimp model.
• 9:49
  I was like that usually. Usually you walk before you run.
• 9:53
  You just went straight to running.
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  I love it. I just have to laugh about that.
• 10:01
  Just just to think about that being, you know, 30 plus years
• 10:04
  ago. No, I love it.
• 10:06
  I mean like, that's I love. It funny.
• 10:09
  You're a go getter. You're a go getter, yeah.
• 10:12
  But you know, back to this list, you know, trying BDSM and you
• 10:18
  know the back bed, you know the vac bed is amazing.
• 10:23
  I the one gentleman I was telling you about in our
• 10:26
  interview, he just actually purchased me a new one.
• 10:31
  I'm supposed to get it next month.
• 10:32
  So you need to come try it out because.
• 10:35
  OK. This is supposed to be like.
• 10:37
  Could I be the? First one.
• 10:40
  Yes, yes, because apparently I don't have to run the vacuum the
• 10:46
  whole time, I can just seal it. Turn off the vacuum so you won't
• 10:50
  have the noise. Oh, OK, right.
• 10:52
  Yeah, that makes sense. Right.
• 10:53
  Once you're kind of vacuum sealed in there and then you, I
• 10:56
  guess lock the pressure, right. Yeah.
• 10:58
  You're you're you're stashed in there.
• 11:00
  Oh my God. I know you're gonna be like
• 11:03
  regulated, you know, but you say you'd love to get them hot and
• 11:06
  sweaty. It's like.
• 11:07
  The perfect sauna. It's my favorite thing.
• 11:10
  It's my favorite thing. The sweatier the better.
• 11:13
  Yeah. No, it's.
• 11:14
  I mean, I it's great. I love to sweat.
• 11:16
  Yeah. I, I don't mind sweating.
• 11:21
  I just don't like that, that pressure on my face when I'm,
• 11:26
  when I'm feeling my hot breath, you know, in that, in that
• 11:30
  moment, but right before it's like completely sucking down,
• 11:33
  no. It's like a, it's like a, it's
• 11:35
  like a sauna steam for your face.
• 11:36
  You know your pores. And I want to say spritz me,
• 11:40
  spritz me. Do you wait?
• 11:44
  Do I? Do you provide showers?
• 11:47
  Will I be able to shower myself off before I have to leave?
• 11:50
  I certainly. Do.
• 11:51
  OK, good, good. Yes.
• 11:53
  Absolutely. And you know, if they're really
• 11:55
  good, I take them out back and spray them with the hose.
• 11:59
  Oh, I don't know, But OK, well, we'll see.
• 12:02
  We'll see. I'm not gonna say no.
• 12:03
  I'm trying not to be like, oh, all right, I'll think about that
• 12:05
  one. I might just need my.
• 12:09
  I might just need my girly time in the shower just to sort of.
• 12:12
  You can have your girly time. I get it.
• 12:16
  So at this point now you you were talking about in one of
• 12:21
  your episodes how you were dignitized.
• 12:25
  I about fell out when I heard that.
• 12:27
  Oh, I know, but who was I talking about?
• 12:29
  You were talking about you're not me.
• 12:32
  Yeah, you were talking about Nico in this when you were like,
• 12:35
  oh, T's in denial and he wants me to be cuck holding him and
• 12:39
  you know, you're going on about that and I was like wow, you
• 12:41
  know, this is really new for her, you know I.
• 12:46
  Don't know. Was it Nico?
• 12:47
  I think at that point it was no. This was prior to Nico, so that
• 12:50
  might have been Clark. Oh, OK, yeah, 'cause you never,
• 12:55
  you never were specific to say his name in the episode, but it
• 12:59
  would have. Been Clark?
• 13:00
  Yeah, judging by the time frame, 'cause you're on Doctor Darian's
• 13:02
  episode. Yeah, I believe so.
• 13:05
  It was right right around that same proximity.
• 13:07
  OK, OK, so at least my memory is that good.
• 13:11
  I mean, I've, you know, I've got some like 730 episodes or
• 13:14
  something. So proud of myself.
• 13:17
  You could be. Yeah, no, that would have been
• 13:21
  Clark. Yes.
• 13:23
  So that was kind of funny when I started.
• 13:26
  That's a funny story. When I when I started and as I
• 13:32
  said, I I made myself this sex bucket list and I, you know, I
• 13:37
  thought, well, where am I going to find these kinksters?
• 13:39
  And I'm like, you got to go on a kinkster sex site, you know,
• 13:42
  which was again, I'm coming from the complete vanilla world.
• 13:44
  Like this is all foreign to me. So I get brave and I, you know,
• 13:49
  I'm like, OK, I get make a profile and and then this guy
• 13:55
  reaches out to me and I was just like, holy shit.
• 14:00
  He is a beyond A10 and I, I'm tall, I'm 510.
• 14:06
  And so I like tall guys. He's 6.
• 14:09
  He's my perfect. He's like my ideal, just he's
• 14:12
  65. What you'd imagine tall, dark
• 14:14
  and handsome pick pick your classic, you know, Calvin Klein
• 14:19
  looking model, you know, the real just chiseled one.
• 14:23
  Beautiful. That's him, that's him.
• 14:26
  And I was just like, Oh my God, I picked the gold jackpot, you
• 14:32
  know, like is this I should have been on these kink sides where
• 14:35
  he said or this is where all the 10s are.
• 14:37
  So, so I'm, I'm going through, you know, and I'm talking to him
• 14:41
  and he's saying that he, you know, I at that point I'm sizing
• 14:47
  up everybody I'm talking to really based on my list, like
• 14:49
  who can I plug into what, you know, I'm like on assignment,
• 14:53
  like, OK, this guy can check off this box.
• 14:56
  This guy can check off that thing.
• 14:57
  I'm, I'm, I'm approaching it from very methodically from a
• 15:00
  business point standpoint. And he starts telling me, Oh
• 15:06
  yeah, that he, you know, plays with other couples and he comes
• 15:08
  in as a bull and he's dominant. And I was like, great, he can do
• 15:12
  the BDSM stuff with me, you know.
• 15:15
  So turns out he's really, that's not really his lane.
• 15:20
  He's and, and I would love, I would love it.
• 15:22
  I bet you if you saw him, you could probably pick out.
• 15:25
  No, he's a sub. Yeah.
• 15:28
  Your sub vibes would probably be going off.
• 15:29
  Now. This was me in the very, very
• 15:31
  beginning. I had no vibes about anything.
• 15:33
  I didn't know how to read anybody for anything.
• 15:36
  So I was as green as they came. And as we get going, come to
• 15:42
  find out he actually isn't, you know, in isn't into being the
• 15:47
  dominant. He wants me to be the dominant.
• 15:49
  And so he starts explaining this stuff to me and he's like, you
• 15:53
  know, do you, you know, he starts sending me these
• 15:55
  pictures. Which do you prefer?
• 15:57
  A which turns you on more A or B?
• 16:00
  And I'm noticing a pattern here, patterns where the woman it's
• 16:04
  either I'm the sub or I'm the Dom.
• 16:06
  And I'm like, and I'm kind of going, I think, I think I know
• 16:10
  where he's going. And so I'm like, oh, they both,
• 16:11
  well, they both look interesting.
• 16:13
  And then he sends a couple more and I go and then I start
• 16:16
  hitting on just to see if I'm right that, you know, the woman
• 16:21
  being the dominant. I'm like, that's really hot.
• 16:24
  And he's like, yeah, you know, then he just dove in on it.
• 16:27
  And I knew I was like, Oh my God, but I didn't know what this
• 16:30
  was all about. So I was in over my skis with
• 16:35
  him. And it's funny that you brought
• 16:36
  this up, the timing of this, because I just released an
• 16:39
  episode where I confessed, you know, that I, and I'd never told
• 16:43
  my audience at the time that he, he, when he got into his
• 16:48
  subspace and, and started doing everything that would have been
• 16:53
  required of me as a informed dominant, I had no idea what was
• 16:59
  going on. And it freaked me the heck out.
• 17:02
  And I mean, I was just like, oh, I I felt like I've hurt this
• 17:06
  guy's feelings, you know, like he's upset with me.
• 17:09
  He said he wanted me to screw these other guys.
• 17:11
  I showed him pictures. He just now he's falling apart,
• 17:14
  you know, and I'm like, I mean, I literally thought I pushed him
• 17:17
  over the edge. I didn't understand his cock
• 17:20
  angst the whole cycle of it and and what really turned him on.
• 17:24
  I anyway, that was quite funny. I never admitted how in over my
• 17:28
  skis I was, but I figured it out.
• 17:31
  Yeah, you gave him spank bank picture.
• 17:34
  Oh yeah, yeah. I just didn't understand like
• 17:39
  that He likes to feel very he his and I I know it varies.
• 17:44
  I know it varies from person to person, but he really likes to
• 17:46
  feel inadequate. I mean, he really, he really
• 17:49
  wants me and I'm like, in the beginning I was just kind of
• 17:52
  like, like he wants me to really hurt his feelings, you know,
• 17:56
  like, and, and it, it was hard for me to go there.
• 17:59
  I just didn't, that whole world was so foreign to me.
• 18:02
  But eventually I did figure it out and I love it.
• 18:05
  Like it's really, really a fun space.
• 18:07
  I consider myself definitely more submissive as I've gone on
• 18:11
  and explored everything all the different.
• 18:14
  Like I said, one door opens another and you just end up
• 18:16
  finding your way. But I, I definitely love, you
• 18:21
  know, I'm, I would say I'm a switch and but an 80, but I
• 18:24
  would make it an 8020, you know, where I 20%, I want to put that
• 18:28
  dominant hat on. But when I do, it's always an
• 18:32
  amazing experience for me. And hopefully just, you know,
• 18:37
  because it's my intention that it's just this that it's amazing
• 18:40
  for the sub. So I love, yeah, I love, I love
• 18:44
  all the stuff I've gotten into over the years.
• 18:47
  It's incredible. Well, you've said before that
• 18:50
  you really feel comfortable and safe with a dominant man.
• 18:54
  Yes. What is your yeah, what is your
• 18:59
  ideal man? Oh.
• 19:02
  Yeah, that. Is a tough question.
• 19:07
  You know physically, mentally, you know you.
• 19:10
  Want you want me to give you the whole like yeah, give.
• 19:13
  You the full encompassment of everything I'll.
• 19:15
  Just tell you the full Yeah, I'll give you the straight kind
• 19:19
  of what I like and what I look for and what I gravitate
• 19:21
  towards. I am tall, as I said, and I get
• 19:26
  a lot of shit for this, but I really, for me, it's like 6 two
• 19:31
  and above. But I prefer the, you know, 6/5
• 19:35
  to 6/7 range. It's it feeds into the
• 19:39
  smallness, which again, I, I, you know, and and the
• 19:42
  protection. I love that feeling of feeling
• 19:45
  safe. I love a man being bigger than
• 19:48
  me physically, you know, to for protection, but then also in the
• 19:52
  bedroom where he can be physically imposing and use his
• 19:55
  weight against me, you know, for doing any kind of consent, non
• 20:00
  consent play. Just I, I love, I love feeling
• 20:05
  how strong a man is. That is super, super sexy to me.
• 20:11
  And yeah, so. Where was I going with that?
• 20:14
  I lost my gym there I I suppose. It's getting hot and bothered.
• 20:18
  Seriously. Yeah.
• 20:19
  I'm as I talk. Oh yeah.
• 20:20
  I'm just describing my ideal man as I talk to that you can I my
• 20:24
  I. My temperature's shifting
• 20:26
  anyway. OK, a little flush.
• 20:30
  I'm I'm flushed, you see, I'm like, yeah, I don't.
• 20:32
  She got a little red and pink. I'm I'm getting like, I'm
• 20:35
  getting all like girly. And that's what, And that's
• 20:40
  really what, that's what a dominant man, I think really
• 20:43
  allows a, a female to do a female partner to do is to and I
• 20:50
  could, I don't, I don't, I don't know what it's like with a man
• 20:52
  when they're same sex. I, I imagine it would be the
• 20:55
  same. You know, that, that somebody's
• 20:57
  you got, you have the polar, you know, the polar opposites and
• 21:00
  that's the energy exchange there.
• 21:02
  So the sentiment I imagine would be the same.
• 21:04
  But I, I start to feel, I think when you've kind of feel like a
• 21:08
  little girl, you know where because you're, that means
• 21:09
  you're safe. You don't have to have your head
• 21:11
  on a swivel. The pressure of everything that
• 21:14
  I do outside when I step outside, when I put that armor
• 21:17
  on, I don't have to have that on.
• 21:19
  I don't have to have a care in the world in the bedroom I love.
• 21:24
  Like it when he calls you good girl.
• 21:28
  I like when he calls me a good girl is dirty little slut when
• 21:30
  he tells when he tells me to come for him, when he says I
• 21:34
  can't come for him. You know I can't come.
• 21:37
  You know, I mean just I love all of it choking on his dig,
• 21:43
  choking on his cock. The the sloppier the better.
• 21:46
  I like being face fucked. I never thought I'd like that.
• 21:49
  I absolutely love it. So relaxing.
• 21:56
  And you know, and what I love most about really the being the
• 22:00
  submissive is that attention is on you.
• 22:04
  And so. You've called yourself a pillow
• 22:07
  Princess, but. That's all that attention is on
• 22:10
  you. All the work this dominant is
• 22:13
  doing in this scene is directed at you, and you want that
• 22:17
  dominant's attention so, so much.
• 22:20
  And you're getting it just unfiltered, 100% on you.
• 22:25
  You don't think about anything else.
• 22:27
  Your mind is quiet and you're super connected to someone else
• 22:36
  like nothing else in the world exists.
• 22:40
  It's the most incredible feeling.
• 22:42
  So I just love it and that's what I'm and so a guy that
• 22:47
  again, the trust physically, you know, I like him tall and well
• 22:51
  built. But and then other aside from
• 22:55
  the sexual components, I have to have two things, loyalty and
• 23:01
  honesty. And.
• 23:04
  Those two things right there I am, I have like you cannot lie
• 23:09
  to me. That's the worst, worst thing
• 23:10
  you could ever do. Like you do it and I'll never
• 23:15
  forget it and I'll probably I just have such a memory for it,
• 23:18
  you know, like don't do it. I feel like adults, we need to
• 23:22
  we really, really need to work on our honesty.
• 23:24
  Just you're not it's better to be it's better to say something
• 23:28
  nicely and risk maybe hurting someone's feelings then being
• 23:33
  dishonest. That's just my personal thought.
• 23:35
  But and and loyalty, because I'm a super loyal person.
• 23:40
  I have, you know, just certain there's certain things you don't
• 23:43
  do by behind someone's back. You know, you can just
• 23:50
  especially even if even if you're mad at them or even if
• 23:52
  you don't agree with them, you don't talk about them behind
• 23:57
  your, you know, like your partner.
• 23:58
  You know, you stand by your partner and you know you don't
• 24:03
  talk about them badly to your friends behind behind their
• 24:06
  back. If you have a problem with them,
• 24:08
  go right to them. You know, keep that keep that
• 24:10
  stuff between you 2. So that's just like my someone
• 24:13
  that's loyal and honest. And if you're dominant, I love
• 24:20
  it. You know I love it.
• 24:22
  So have you been with a dominant man?
• 24:24
  And you're thinking, why did he call himself a dominant?
• 24:27
  It was all for show. Oh yeah, the fake DOMS.
• 24:32
  Oh, the fake doms? Yes, please tell me.
• 24:35
  I call them the Ding Dong Doms. Beautiful Ding Dong Dong.
• 24:39
  Yeah, they're everywhere. They're all over.
• 24:42
  They're all over. They're they're just.
• 24:45
  I'm sure you have a lot of you know.
• 24:48
  I call them wannabe Doms. Yes, yes, yeah.
• 24:52
  People that I think they just see stuff on, you know, in a
• 24:56
  movie, they're seeing it in porn and they don't understand the
• 25:03
  dynamic. They don't understand what a
• 25:05
  power exchange really is means and is about and the type of
• 25:09
  trust and the amount of conversation you have to have
• 25:15
  before you engage with these in these types of play.
• 25:20
  Yeah, it's and it's very deep. I mean, it's not, I don't know.
• 25:24
  It's I think if I think if vanilla couples understood the
• 25:30
  power dynamics better, they're they would have better sex
• 25:35
  relationships. You know that sexually they
• 25:37
  would, they don't have to act all of it out, but just
• 25:40
  understanding that because and, and the dialogue that you have
• 25:45
  to have before you even get physical with someone, it it
• 25:51
  really, it builds the trust just through that dialogue, you know,
• 25:55
  and so you're already starting ahead of it, you know, ahead of
• 25:59
  the game because the conversations that you're
• 26:01
  having, I guarantee you a lot of married couples have never even
• 26:04
  talked that deeply. It's sad, isn't it?
• 26:07
  It it is, it is. I will, I will say the one sad
• 26:11
  thing to me that I wish I didn't know is the state of married
• 26:20
  couples, the actual happiness factor that just does not exist
• 26:27
  in, you know, like the like the Disney movies.
• 26:30
  I'm still hopeful. I like to I'm I Pollyanna
• 26:33
  everything. I, I always have to look on the
• 26:36
  bright side like, whoa, everybody's who can be happy and
• 26:40
  that's what I want, you know, and that's what I want for
• 26:42
  everybody else. And so, but as you know, I'm
• 26:46
  sure you know, when you get people writing you and reaching
• 26:48
  out, a lot of times you'll strike a chord with something
• 26:50
  you say and you know, they'll open up about how that element
• 26:55
  or whatever you were discussing is something that's missing from
• 26:59
  their relationship. Or I get people telling me, you
• 27:03
  know, they haven't had their partner, won't doesn't want to
• 27:07
  have sex with them and hasn't wanted to have sex with them.
• 27:08
  And, you know, over a decade and just like, and that's, that's
• 27:11
  not. Unusual.
• 27:12
  No, it's not so sad. Crazy.
• 27:16
  Say it. It's crazy.
• 27:18
  It's shocking. It is very shocking.
• 27:22
  And when I and this, when I hear it, it gets me like I'm
• 27:26
  passionate about it gets me fired up because I want to say
• 27:29
  like, wake up people, what are you doing?
• 27:32
  It's just. You've lost the plot.
• 27:35
  You know, if you're if you're if you're with somebody and you've
• 27:38
  decided to build a life together, you need to make your
• 27:42
  relationship the primary focus of your world.
• 27:45
  And then everything else that's below that is going to be doing
• 27:48
  great if you guys are solid. Yeah, very much so.
• 27:53
  Yeah, and you can't be and you can't be solid as a married
• 27:57
  couple or, or a long term committed couple without a
• 28:00
  healthy sex life because nobody's, you know, guaranteed
• 28:04
  there's one of you that's feeling like they did not sign
• 28:06
  up for a life of celibacy when they took a vow to you.
• 28:12
  Very true, very true. Yeah, yeah.
• 28:15
  I mean, it's a lot of lonely married people out there.
• 28:18
  They're lonely in their own homes.
• 28:19
  It's next to sleep next to their own spouse every night, and
• 28:22
  they're lonely as heck. It's sad.
• 28:24
  You know, it's amazing that we both advocate so much for men
• 28:28
  because like you said, we have. We have, you know, 80% of our
• 28:36
  listeners are all men and it's, you know, for specific reasons
• 28:40
  like this. Yes, yeah, no, it's it's like
• 28:44
  like I told you when we were on our on our interview for my
• 28:48
  show, I it's been eye opening for my understanding of men, but
• 28:56
  also it's just created this amazing curiosity to want to
• 29:02
  know more and learn them better and understand them better.
• 29:05
  And really you should that's how we should feel.
• 29:07
  You should be want to be fascinated about your partner
• 29:10
  and, and know how they work and, and you'll never know
• 29:14
  everything. And I think for me like that,
• 29:16
  the pursuit of that, like knowing like, because I just
• 29:19
  want to know it all. I want to know everything about
• 29:21
  them and, and, and the and knowing because I don't like to
• 29:25
  hear the word know, knowing that realistically, I cannot and
• 29:28
  never will know everything about them.
• 29:29
  They'll always be hidden secret sides.
• 29:31
  And that's why I stay fascinated and that's why I stay plugged in
• 29:34
  and interested to, you know, constantly want to know who's
• 29:38
  this person I sleep next to or who's this person that I fuck.
• 29:42
  You know what, what's going on up there?
• 29:45
  You know, I just want to want to get in there heads and
• 29:49
  understand them. So that's been that's probably
• 29:52
  been the biggest blessing from doing this.
• 29:55
  It's not all the fun sex, which is great.
• 29:58
  It is great, but I feel more balanced after all of this.
• 30:04
  You know, I, I feel like I've, I've picked some locks that
• 30:09
  needed to be picked and, and I'm still and I'm still going like
• 30:13
  that. I'm not stopping.
• 30:16
  Yeah, yeah. I was gonna say, your number's
• 30:19
  gone up, I take it, right? My like your sex?
• 30:24
  Your sex number? Yeah, Your body count.
• 30:26
  Oh, sure, I get off. I'm doing it.
• 30:30
  I'm doing this episode on body count.
• 30:32
  That's on my it's on my production list.
• 30:35
  Oh, hilarious. I have to record that after
• 30:37
  this. Oh, that's awesome.
• 30:40
  So funny. Oh my gosh, you're what's your
• 30:42
  come on, what's your body count? I, I actually don't know.
• 30:46
  I know it's below 30 because I didn't start with a high one and
• 30:50
  actually what? And I didn't, even though it's
• 30:52
  been 10 years, I know it sounds like, oh, you must have gone
• 30:55
  crazy. I haven't because what I, I, I
• 30:58
  don't like 1 offs. I prefer I look for a friends
• 31:01
  with benefits and part of my process was and, and it helped
• 31:06
  having the bucket list by the way, because when I approached
• 31:09
  these guys, actually, the bucket list was a great thing.
• 31:12
  If you're going on a sex, if you're going to go on, if you're
• 31:15
  going to do like I did, you're you're green, you're going to
• 31:17
  jump on make yourself a sex bucket list.
• 31:20
  Because I was targeting each person and putting them into a
• 31:24
  role. And it gave me something to talk
• 31:26
  about and gave me to and I told them I'm doing this.
• 31:29
  I'm going to talk about it on my podcast.
• 31:31
  Do you want to be a part of this?
• 31:33
  I want to it says you're into this and I've never had X.
• 31:37
  Do you want to do X with me? And they're like, Oh yeah, you
• 31:40
  know, I mean, like this was a great icebreaker.
• 31:42
  And and then the guys that I would meet, because, you know,
• 31:47
  we kind of started off on the same, you know, we just started
• 31:49
  off on the same page. It was understood like, I don't
• 31:51
  want one offs because I want to keep exploring with you and
• 31:54
  experimenting because I know that when we know each other's
• 31:57
  bodies better, our sex is going to get better, so much better.
• 32:01
  You know, also know each other better.
• 32:04
  We're going to have a bond with, no, we're not going to go
• 32:07
  skipping off into the sunset, but we're friends and we care
• 32:10
  about each other and we're going to have some fun.
• 32:13
  So those people stick around and I didn't have so I call them I,
• 32:19
  I, I retread, you know, it's just like you just have the same
• 32:22
  partners. I call them the retreads.
• 32:24
  I mean lovingly. I don't, I don't say that
• 32:26
  flippantly. I, I really care about most of
• 32:28
  the guys I have relationships with.
• 32:31
  And then, then. And.
• 32:33
  Then you have and then yeah. And then you have, you know, and
• 32:35
  then every once in a while you have a A1 off, you know, here
• 32:37
  and there. It's sometimes you just don't
• 32:39
  mesh with somebody after you fuck them, you know, you're
• 32:42
  like, that wasn't very good. Yeah.
• 32:43
  Yeah, I could. I could.
• 32:45
  I don't need to do that again. It just wasn't feeling that the
• 32:48
  spark wasn't there like I thought.
• 32:50
  But yeah, so, so my body count, it didn't.
• 32:56
  It could have really gone through the roof.
• 32:58
  But because I prefer to have friends with benefits and
• 33:02
  ongoing relationships with people, I didn't have to cross
• 33:08
  too much of A threshold. But yeah.
• 33:10
  But it didn't. No.
• 33:10
  I mean, I did. I did did get up there.
• 33:13
  Yeah, that's awesome. Yeah, that's awesome.
• 33:15
  Well, you need. What's your body count?
• 33:17
  A. Lot more than 30.
• 33:21
  OK dude, we'll leave it at that. What do you think?
• 33:26
  Let me ask you, what's your opinion?
• 33:28
  I'm really curious because that's why I'm doing the Body
• 33:31
  Count episode because I've never talked about it on my show and
• 33:35
  there a lot's changed over a decade.
• 33:40
  I mean, the dating marketplace is so different than it was when
• 33:44
  I first started. It is it's amazing.
• 33:47
  And so most people wouldn't have been paying attention.
• 33:49
  But since this is happens to be the area I was really focused
• 33:52
  on, I noticed a lot of little things about about a lot of
• 33:56
  little things and this dating part being 1 of it.
• 34:00
  And it just like now things are really different.
• 34:07
  And I don't know, I, I didn't hear people talking about body
• 34:11
  count 10 years ago. I maybe they were, maybe I
• 34:14
  didn't know. But now I hear guys more saying,
• 34:17
  you know, there's this thing going around.
• 34:20
  If she's got more than five partners, you wouldn't want to
• 34:24
  be in a relationship with her because she won't bond to you or
• 34:28
  whatever. All kinds of crazy stuff.
• 34:29
  You hear all these things going around, then you start to hear
• 34:32
  that same talking point chirped, you know, a couple different
• 34:36
  times. And I tend to be someone who
• 34:38
  loves data and who loves research and science.
• 34:43
  And so I'm like, I'm gonna fucking debunk the shit out of
• 34:46
  this 'cause I can already tell by their sentences they're wrong
• 34:48
  just by their, just by the words they use.
• 34:51
  That's not scientific language. So I can't wait to do this
• 34:54
  episode and just, you know, hopefully, hopefully, yeah, shed
• 34:59
  some light. But I'm curious about whether
• 35:00
  you think what the price is, if you pay a price at all for a
• 35:06
  higher body count. Well, you know, I was very lucky
• 35:10
  never to get an STDFTI. None of that.
• 35:13
  I always practice safe sex. I did, but mine was well into
• 35:18
  1000 and I went and when I didn't lose my virginity till I
• 35:23
  was 21. But I'm a sex addict.
• 35:28
  Oh. Yeah, how come I'm gonna pull
• 35:31
  that out of you when you were on my show?
• 35:33
  Damn it, I'm gonna I'll go back and and reintroduce you.
• 35:37
  By the way, she's a sex addict. So now you really gotta listen,
• 35:40
  you horny guys, right? Yeah, yeah, I have a problem.
• 35:45
  And, you know, before I, before I met my first husband and I
• 35:50
  turned 21, I was saving myself for love.
• 35:53
  And then I was like, I can't hold out anymore.
• 35:55
  I was like chronically masturbating.
• 35:58
  And I was like, you know, I've got to really connect with
• 36:02
  something, someone. And like I said, you know, we
• 36:05
  had love at AOL. We'd go in chat rooms.
• 36:07
  We went, you know, all these great chat rooms.
• 36:11
  And it was like, oh, you want to meet?
• 36:13
  Oh, yeah, let's do it. And I would get absolutely crazy
• 36:18
  horny when I said, hey, I'm in my apartment, I'm upstairs, I'll
• 36:22
  leave the front door unlocked. Somewhere I've never met, you
• 36:26
  know, and that is this this crazy addiction.
• 36:30
  Yeah. Please tell this is what I want
• 36:32
  you to talk about on the confession.
• 36:34
  OK. So good I want to hear this
• 36:36
  story. I I can see this guy coming up
• 36:38
  your stairs right now. Like the anticipation?
• 36:42
  Yeah, well, thank God it wasn't Ted Bundy.
• 36:45
  But shit, I mean like things we probably wouldn't do nowadays.
• 36:48
  No, no, I know I got. Older and sensible.
• 36:53
  I know, I know. I had AI did an episode.
• 36:56
  It was probably it was it was in my first year called ugly
• 36:59
  fucking and that was a bit Yeah, that was about here's what you
• 37:03
  don't do as a single girl. And I did get an STD.
• 37:07
  Oh fuck, I know, I know it was a the guy.
• 37:11
  It was a total bait and switch. I didn't follow my protocol and
• 37:15
  you know where he's going down on me and before you know, I
• 37:20
  think I I understand yes, we're moving to the next phase here.
• 37:23
  Penetration. He and there's a condom right
• 37:26
  there. He just tries to you know, he's
• 37:29
  just doing a little trial close there and I was like, whoa,
• 37:31
  whoa, whoa, but he taught. He got it in for a second and I
• 37:36
  ended up with an STD. Wow, I've got it curable.
• 37:41
  I mean, you know, I just, I had to go and but.
• 37:45
  Still. I never had one.
• 37:47
  Oh, it's so embarrassing going to my doctor.
• 37:51
  He's like, you have an STD. I'm like.
• 37:54
  Yeah. Oh joy.
• 37:56
  Yeah, yeah, anyway, so there's my STD story.
• 38:00
  Lovely, huh? Right things.
• 38:03
  You try, when I say there's some, you make some trade-offs.
• 38:06
  I was, I actually, I had forgotten about that's a trade
• 38:08
  off. I but I was also talking about,
• 38:11
  you know, I, there's been times where I felt and I'm always stay
• 38:17
  true to myself with this and you know, so This is why I don't
• 38:24
  know. You know, when the guys say
• 38:26
  you're, it's going to, you know, basically it's going to make you
• 38:29
  a bad partner down the road. I, I do disagree with that, but
• 38:33
  I recognize that there are some trades and there are sometimes
• 38:36
  where you can't give yourself. You are, I mean, when you
• 38:40
  interact with somebody physically, there it is.
• 38:42
  You are giving up some of yourself.
• 38:44
  I mean, they're inside you, they're inside your box.
• 38:47
  And so we can't discount that. And there's just times where I'm
• 38:51
  like, I can't, I feel like I don't, I don't have to give,
• 38:54
  like I'm not, I know I need to sort of draw back and not be out
• 38:58
  there as much and not be seeing as many people at the same, you
• 39:02
  know, not be that polyamorous as I am or whatever the case may be
• 39:07
  at the time. And I just, you know, I kind of
• 39:09
  withdraw, go into my little girl cave and then I come back out,
• 39:13
  you know, usually I just need a little time for myself or
• 39:15
  whatever. So that is when I'm recognizing,
• 39:19
  you know, like when you, I think there is something maybe
• 39:22
  spiritually that you, you know, you kind of where you kind of
• 39:25
  need to pull back and guard yourself a little bit sometimes.
• 39:28
  Have you ever had that is, or am I imagining that?
• 39:32
  No, I think that I think ultimately, you know, it was
• 39:37
  kind of like, for example, there was this beautiful pilot.
• 39:44
  I'm, I'm one of those people. I'm really not into like blonde
• 39:48
  blondes, but he had like platinum blonde hair and he was,
• 39:51
  he was your kind of guy. He was 6 foot 4.
• 39:54
  You know, I like little little tiny 5 foot, 75 foot 8 cute
• 40:00
  little, you know, 130 LB cute little guys.
• 40:02
  You know, they can have a little muscle to them, but ultimately I
• 40:06
  like little guys. I can imagine putting in my
• 40:07
  little pocket or my bra, you know?
• 40:09
  Yeah, I like, no, I mean, and I love that view.
• 40:12
  I can tell that's like perfect. That makes sense.
• 40:16
  Right. Well, this guy, you know, he was
• 40:19
  a typical Brad. You know, he was sexy, he was
• 40:22
  hot and he fucking knew it. And he had this glorious 9 inch
• 40:27
  cock and you know, he unzipped his pants and the sunshine on it
• 40:31
  and it's like, you know. Porno cock.
• 40:35
  Yeah, you know, but it was one of those.
• 40:38
  And I was like, yeah, he's an asshole.
• 40:41
  I'm not going to fuck him. You know, I'm like, you can eat
• 40:44
  my pussy and I might suck your Dick.
• 40:48
  But it was it was those moments when guys are douche bags that I
• 40:52
  would not love them. But he probably loved that.
• 40:56
  You know he fucking hated it though, because yeah, when I, he
• 41:02
  wasn't a submissive. He was hate loving it.
• 41:05
  He just he just didn't know how much he wanted to love it.
• 41:08
  Maybe telling you I could feel it.
• 41:09
  He's on the verge. I you had, like you said, you
• 41:13
  have your what do we call it your sub radar or whatever sub
• 41:18
  intuition, sub tuition. I am starting to have that.
• 41:25
  I'm starting to. Pin up.
• 41:27
  On that with partners and I have one right now and I'm telling
• 41:32
  you, Mr. Smia, he is, he is so a sub.
• 41:36
  He, he, just, he, I'm, I'm going to help him.
• 41:39
  He just don't realize it yet. I want.
• 41:41
  To help him. He thinks he's the dominant.
• 41:43
  No, he's not. I'm like when I, when I now that
• 41:47
  I've come across him, my Clark experience is my those bells are
• 41:52
  going off. I'm like this guy.
• 41:55
  He wants, he wants to be told what to do and I did last time I
• 41:59
  saw him, I told him what to do. And next time I'm going to tell
• 42:02
  him what to do and I'm just going to keep.
• 42:04
  I wanted that a little bit and let's see because he's totally
• 42:07
  getting off on it. You know, you can also like, pay
• 42:13
  him a compliment, but then insult him with something that
• 42:16
  he can physically change. Like, you know, you might want
• 42:21
  to color your hair or maybe maybe fix it a little
• 42:24
  differently. You know, just like little
• 42:26
  things just to like, get in a little jab.
• 42:29
  OK. Oh, oh, that's you see, this is
• 42:31
  advanced. This is level stuff.
• 42:33
  Now we're getting into this, yes?
• 42:35
  Yes. Little seeds.
• 42:37
  You got to plant the seed. Yeah, and then you can go and go
• 42:41
  and poke it later. We planted a sore spot.
• 42:45
  Now I'm going to take my heel and grind in it.
• 42:47
  Oh, you can grind your heel anywhere they want it, right?
• 42:51
  Oh yes, he does. He wants some heels.
• 42:54
  He does. He wants to wear my heels.
• 42:56
  I know guys that like the sound of your heels.
• 42:59
  They love. It normally I think I would
• 43:01
  never think a guy that's like, oh, I love high heels.
• 43:04
  I wouldn't have picked up on the fact that that's a that that
• 43:07
  that's potentially A submissive trait.
• 43:09
  I'm not saying all guys, you know, just because you like
• 43:11
  heels, you're submissive, but there is that's part of it.
• 43:14
  You know you need to. You might need to ask another
• 43:16
  qualifying question on that to see how much do you like heels
• 43:19
  and why do you like them. So tell me this, we're talking
• 43:25
  about even going back further with men and dating and whether
• 43:30
  or not you're going to fuck them.
• 43:31
  And like you said, you're giving that piece of yourself.
• 43:33
  But what are these red flags? Because I always tell women and
• 43:37
  men who listen to the show, hey, don't do this.
• 43:40
  This is a red flag. Where are your red flags when
• 43:43
  you see men and whether or not you actually want to fuck them
• 43:45
  because you know it biologically and physically.
• 43:49
  We're thinking in our mind within the 1st 10 minutes
• 43:51
  whether or not we're going to fuck them.
• 43:53
  Yes, yes, well, and I, I have a process, I have a qualification
• 43:59
  process because I don't like. To tell me.
• 44:01
  Yes, you have to you got to run them through the process,
• 44:05
  otherwise you're going to be spinning your wheels.
• 44:08
  So basically, and and this is actually so for women, this is
• 44:12
  really important, but a lot of it has to do with safety.
• 44:15
  So I'll, I'll, I'll give you all the things and, and the process.
• 44:19
  So you're right for safety and things like that.
• 44:21
  So people kind of forget like #1 whatever pictures you post on
• 44:25
  your dating site, those have to be germane to that dating site
• 44:30
  and that site only never ever post them any other place public
• 44:34
  facing. It can't be your, you know,
• 44:36
  Facebook photo or a photo you have in Facebook or on your
• 44:39
  regular social media in the very beginning.
• 44:42
  You just want to stay as anonymous as you can and not,
• 44:46
  you know, cuz guys will take that picture and they'll drop it
• 44:49
  into Google and they'll find, you know, find they'll start
• 44:51
  researching you and people some just sometimes people just want
• 44:56
  to do that for legitimate reasons.
• 44:57
  Make sure you're not a weirdo, but you don't want the weird
• 45:01
  case if somebody is like a stalker or a bizarre person,
• 45:04
  which I've had. So yeah, that's number one.
• 45:08
  And then I, when I, once I talk to somebody, I want to get off
• 45:14
  the app as fast as I can, give them a burner number, OK, I use
• 45:19
  the burner number and then we can, we can chat there.
• 45:22
  And then I want to make a phone call or a video call to verify
• 45:25
  pretty quickly who I'm talking to.
• 45:29
  Do that really quickly. And then you'll know if,
• 45:32
  especially for men, do that really quickly.
• 45:34
  And then you'll know if you're talking to a real person or the
• 45:37
  catfish, the faster you move that part along, you're going to
• 45:42
  get those fakers to drop off right there.
• 45:44
  They're just, they'll ghost right there, right on.
• 45:47
  So, so make sure that you have, again, this person has a burner
• 45:52
  number, never got your real phone number.
• 45:55
  Do the verification phone call so that you can see their face.
• 45:58
  And then they match the pictures and all that.
• 46:01
  I always reconfirm what they've told me, whatever their status
• 46:06
  is, because unfortunately, I as a woman, run across a lot of
• 46:09
  guys that are cheating and they're pretending that they're
• 46:13
  single and they're not. And that's, those are activities
• 46:16
  I don't want to engage in and I don't want to be with anybody's
• 46:21
  partner or, or husband. And you know, if they're not in
• 46:24
  an open relationship, it's just not my preference.
• 46:28
  So I then usually that's, I use the video call as well to verify
• 46:33
  facts, Repeat, you know, ask them a different way than you
• 46:36
  did the first time just to see if they answer differently.
• 46:41
  And then if everything checks out, then I set up a meet and
• 46:44
  greet. And that means just coffee or a
• 46:47
  drink in a public place. There is no expectation or
• 46:50
  belief on that person's part that we're going to be having
• 46:53
  sex. The goal is for me to decide
• 46:56
  whether or not and you to decide whether or not we want to set up
• 47:00
  a second date. And then at that point we, you
• 47:02
  know, we can do whatever we want.
• 47:04
  So so. We meet them now what?
• 47:07
  What do you think? I mean, say you're attracted to
• 47:10
  someone on some level when you meet them, but is there one
• 47:14
  specific, like red flag when you either talk to him or look at
• 47:18
  him that you're like, yeah, no. Is there something that's really
• 47:22
  I mean? There's a, there's, there's a
• 47:23
  lot I mean. Well, give me, give me the top
• 47:26
  three because I have one that is like when I see that, I'm like,
• 47:30
  Nope, Nope, I'm walking away. It's probably like this might be
• 47:39
  Birkenstocks. Oh, OK.
• 47:42
  I don't like Birkenstocks and I don't like them on a man and I I
• 47:45
  really don't want to see your feet right away because a lot of
• 47:47
  times men don't take good care of their feet.
• 47:49
  Let's be honest. And I just, I don't want you.
• 47:53
  I don't want you open toed shoes like flip flop.
• 47:56
  I don't need to see it. Don't you hate those crisscross
• 47:59
  sandals that look like camper sandals?
• 48:02
  Like, yes, what are we hobos? Like they're called Tivos I
• 48:06
  yeah, I don't like those terrible.
• 48:08
  No yes, I'm I'm gonna definitely notice how you how you showed up
• 48:14
  to meet me. I show up as full on You are
• 48:17
  getting the full on Layla show. I because I take time to show up
• 48:23
  and care about my appearance for you.
• 48:25
  So if you show up looking like a Schlumpadinka and you know your
• 48:30
  wrinkly, your hair is a mess. Yeah, your you got one part of
• 48:34
  your shirt tucked in the other parts out.
• 48:36
  You know, you look, if you look slovenly, of course, like that's
• 48:39
  a big. I love your adjectives.
• 48:42
  I mean, right, but again, about it.
• 48:46
  It's true. Contemplating whether or not
• 48:49
  she's going to let you put some put your body part inside of
• 48:53
  her. I know.
• 48:55
  You should show up looking like that's what you're showing up
• 48:59
  for. And and if you show up casual
• 49:01
  like that, then I just know Then I it tells me like a lot of
• 49:05
  things go off my brain. I'm I'm automatically saying
• 49:08
  you're lazy and bad in bed and I don't want to fuck lazy and bad
• 49:11
  in bed. No, I'm not lazy and bad in bed,
• 49:14
  so I don't want to. It's not happening right.
• 49:17
  And the the other thing is the other one thing is OK.
• 49:22
  So there's and then 2. Two more probably glaring things
• 49:24
  I would say. OK men, take note.
• 49:27
  Yes. If you're, oh, there's a couple,
• 49:31
  OK, being overly sexual, OK being on your phone too much.
• 49:38
  And I noticed if somebody can't make direct eye contact with me,
• 49:43
  because when I talk to people, I make direct eye contact.
• 49:46
  And if they're really looking down a lot and they don't make
• 49:50
  eye contact with me, that I'm like, no, I can't fuck you.
• 49:54
  And, and if they don't pay the bill, see, yeah, I'm adamant
• 50:02
  about that. I don't, I, I will die on that
• 50:05
  hill. I do not care.
• 50:06
  The I, I am still old school. I am old school.
• 50:13
  I think a gentle you know, men should be men and women should
• 50:17
  be women. And the money you save is not
• 50:25
  worth the humiliation of what she's thinking about you behind
• 50:30
  your back for not paying that bill.
• 50:33
  What? And you don't have to.
• 50:34
  It doesn't have to be expensive. But if you invite a woman to
• 50:36
  coffee to meet her pay for the coffee, Yeah, Absolutely.
• 50:41
  Yeah. So I'm not.
• 50:43
  Yeah. If you, if you don't, if you
• 50:46
  don't have any chivalry or good manners, it's not going to
• 50:49
  happen. Yeah.
• 50:51
  All right, so I. Was that a long list I feel
• 50:54
  like? No, no, it's not a long list.
• 50:57
  I just think, I think it's just, I think it's just being raised
• 51:01
  right. Honestly.
• 51:02
  I, I say that a lot on my show. It's like, that's how I sum it
• 51:06
  up when someone says why didn't you?
• 51:08
  Why couldn't you go? Why?
• 51:09
  Why didn't you like him? Why didn't it work out?
• 51:10
  He's just not raised right. Not raised right.
• 51:13
  Yeah, you know. See, I'm OK with, you know, like
• 51:17
  flip flops, if they're nice leather flip flops.
• 51:19
  And you know, we live in Florida, you know, it's like.
• 51:21
  I'm I'm, I'm OK with it, but but if you have gargoyle toes, I'm
• 51:26
  going to grow. I'm going to be grossed out.
• 51:28
  That's what I'm just saying. Like so to me, have them cover
• 51:31
  them. Yeah, it's.
• 51:34
  It's great. It's great to have that level of
• 51:38
  transparency because then you can see his feet.
• 51:41
  And if if they're they're nice feet and they're clean toenails
• 51:45
  and they're well groomed, yeah, then you can imagine I've never
• 51:51
  been with. Anybody who cared about their
• 51:54
  feet that wasn't meticulous in bed too, paid attention to
• 51:57
  detail. That's somebody that's detail
• 51:58
  oriented. Exactly.
• 52:00
  The one thing that I always look at wherever I go.
• 52:04
  What bugs me is a man with long fingernails or dirty
• 52:09
  fingernails. It grosses me out.
• 52:12
  I can't do it. I'm just like, those fingers are
• 52:15
  not going in me. Oh yeah, I know.
• 52:17
  No fucking way. No.
• 52:19
  Can't do it. Yeah, I can't.
• 52:22
  I can't even see like I don't even want to see women with bad
• 52:26
  pants or bad fingernails. You know, it's like the lady
• 52:31
  ladylike or, or every time you know the, you know, the really,
• 52:34
  really long nails, like super long.
• 52:37
  I'm like. How?
• 52:41
  How is that possible? Why you?
• 52:44
  Can't pick those in anybody, you know, Yeah.
• 52:55
  Yeah, hygiene to me. I'm with you.
• 52:57
  It's it's. Number one, getting prostate.
• 53:00
  I can tell the guys that are not getting prostate massages, I
• 53:03
  know who they are by their girlfriends, you know, like.
• 53:09
  So yeah, so do you consider yourself, I know you said pillow
• 53:13
  Princess, but would you consider yourself a size queen?
• 53:16
  And if So, what has been your biggest cock?
• 53:21
  OK, this is a. There's a debate.
• 53:24
  They can't see your face, but the expression that you just had
• 53:27
  is like, yeah, yeah, I remember. I'm laughing because there's
• 53:33
  this debate, there's this ongoing debate.
• 53:35
  I, I, I deny vehemently that I'm a size queen.
• 53:39
  But then every time I have a really big cock and the way I
• 53:42
  talk about it, people like, you're a total size queen listen
• 53:46
  to you. And I'm like, no, I I have just
• 53:49
  as much fun with. As long as you're.
• 53:51
  It's about the blood flow for me anyway.
• 53:53
  The Dick gets hard. I'm Cappy.
• 53:54
  Yeah. But there is something about a
• 54:02
  big Dick that is very, very satisfying.
• 54:06
  It's very fulfilling. It's like when you come across a
• 54:10
  truly, truly big one it. It's like Christmas, you know,
• 54:13
  You're like, I mean, there's a because there's a difference
• 54:18
  between having having a long Dick or just being penetrated.
• 54:25
  Just just the act of penetration, how it feels and
• 54:27
  the areas that hits and how it feels good.
• 54:30
  Now when you add on top of that, being stretched, the feeling of
• 54:36
  the tightness and the and being stretched and fully filled,
• 54:40
  that's a whole nother level of sensation.
• 54:42
  So when you layer all those together, yeah, I mean, there's,
• 54:47
  I wouldn't say like I have that I have to have it all the time,
• 54:49
  but I definitely wanna go that way, go that route sometimes.
• 54:56
  And I actually have a dildo, I call it my special occasion
• 54:59
  dildo that is big and I only use it every once in a while.
• 55:05
  Like if I'm really craving a big Dick and I don't have access to
• 55:08
  a real one, I'll use that. But I use it sparingly because
• 55:13
  it, it's so big. I'm just like, no, no, I, I want
• 55:16
  my pussy to stay pristine. And I know that's all in my
• 55:18
  head, but I, I have the psychology of it works for me.
• 55:21
  That's how I, that's how I don't turn myself into a size queen
• 55:25
  and just fuck the shit out of myself with that thing all the
• 55:27
  time and never leave the house because it is amazing and it
• 55:31
  feels incredible. And I do love a big Dick, but I
• 55:35
  also appreciate all sizes and I have a barrier in place that
• 55:40
  prevents me from officially crossing over into the size
• 55:44
  queen zone and I've just given away my secret on how I do it.
• 55:53
  Oh wow, So what do you think has been your best sexual experience
• 55:59
  and in your journey since this all began?
• 56:03
  I mean. And you can give me the top 3
• 56:05
  even honestly. I mean, you're talking 30
• 56:08
  people. Oh my God, no, it's I'm I'm
• 56:11
  South of 30. I'm South of 30.
• 56:13
  Let's we'll say that, but Oh my gosh, I mean there there's just
• 56:21
  there could be different things for different.
• 56:24
  I mean, I I fisted I I fisted this is this wasn't my like
• 56:31
  pleasure wise or but from a learning sense and a a sheer
• 56:40
  wonderment like like that's what my face that you see the face I
• 56:47
  just made that that was the look on my face while this was
• 56:51
  happening. You're describing going to
• 56:53
  Disneyland. It's like being Disneyland.
• 56:55
  That's what it's like. You can't even believe the
• 57:00
  pleasure you're watching this person experience and you're the
• 57:04
  one doing it. And and the boot, I'm not even
• 57:08
  touching his Dick, but I've got my whole fist in his ass and
• 57:14
  he's watching the reaction. You know, the way he's his body
• 57:19
  is reacting and the look on his face.
• 57:21
  And this is a partner that I was really connected to and together
• 57:25
  with for a long time. And, you know, I was so dialed
• 57:29
  in and focused on his pleasure. And then just to see it happen
• 57:33
  and watch the orgasm and the way his muscles are twitching and
• 57:40
  everything. Like I'd never seen a man orgasm
• 57:43
  that hard that fully and that completely.
• 57:46
  It blew my mind. So yeah, that, I mean, just from
• 57:50
  my fist. And I never thought I'd put my
• 57:55
  fist in someone's ass, but he wanted me to and I did.
• 58:00
  And great. It's it's the best.
• 58:03
  I mean, we planned, you know, this is a planned event.
• 58:06
  But yeah, I mean, and most people think, oh, that you would
• 58:13
  never be that excited about the thought of putting your fist in
• 58:15
  someone's ass. But when you really care about
• 58:17
  somebody and you see the level of pleasure that you can give
• 58:20
  them, you're going to want to put your fish in someone's ass.
• 58:23
  Yeah, yeah, yeah, right. I mean.
• 58:27
  I always say I'm going to make you my puppet.
• 58:29
  There, you, your little hand puppet.
• 58:32
  I know. I mean, that's what he was.
• 58:34
  I never thought of it that way. And he did you help me with the
• 58:38
  you help me with the good psychology of it.
• 58:40
  You're you're framing my mind on how I'm supposed to be thinking
• 58:43
  about these things. I'm still in my infancy stage on
• 58:46
  my little, my little. I've got my my Dom training
• 58:49
  wheels on. You know, that's great.
• 58:54
  That's great. Yeah.
• 58:56
  I that was that's definitely, like when you said memorable.
• 59:00
  I mean, there's been emotionally memorable and just like
• 59:04
  unbelievably mind blowing connected sex.
• 59:08
  I had a full body orgasm that I've never like.
• 59:14
  Thank God my partner was there to see it because I've it was,
• 59:20
  it was incredible. My whole body was just like
• 59:23
  shaking and almost like it sounds a little funny, but my
• 59:27
  face was almost felt like paralyzed, like I hope I I
• 59:30
  couldn't speak and I was looking at him and, and, and the waves
• 59:33
  were just rolling through me and I was, it just was like, it was
• 59:37
  like this coming and it was just rolling.
• 59:41
  I don't even, I still don't even know how to explain it.
• 59:43
  And that's why I'm so glad. I mean, he did it to me.
• 59:46
  You know, it was my dominant he did it and and that he bears
• 59:51
  witness to that because it was the most powerful, strongest,
• 59:58
  different kind of orgasm you that I've ever had and tapping
• 1:00:02
  into that kind of stuff again, knowing that you, your body can
• 1:00:07
  do that. I never knew.
• 1:00:09
  Isn't that amazing? It's unbelievable.
• 1:00:12
  People don't realize how pleasure, how much pleasure
• 1:00:15
  their bodies have in them. And a lot of times I say, you
• 1:00:18
  know, people say, you know, we've been having, you know, our
• 1:00:21
  sex is just it's OK. It's just kind of a boring and
• 1:00:24
  I. You know, and I think to myself,
• 1:00:26
  OK, I'm just going to have to give it to you straight.
• 1:00:28
  It's the sex isn't boring. You're boring.
• 1:00:30
  It's you. You can change that in an
• 1:00:33
  instant. You can change it with your next
• 1:00:36
  session. I mean, you can completely blow
• 1:00:40
  the door off that in a in a heartbeat, but you have to be
• 1:00:43
  willing to stop just doing the same old shit that you do every
• 1:00:47
  day. And of course it's boring.
• 1:00:48
  Why wouldn't it be boring? You've done it bazillion times,
• 1:00:52
  you know, and you just need to add 1 little different element
• 1:00:57
  and you'll totally spice it up and change things.
• 1:00:59
  So yeah, it's unfortunately people are just boring when it
• 1:01:06
  comes to sex. And a lot of them are.
• 1:01:09
  I mean, it's I was, I was, I was in that camp.
• 1:01:13
  I didn't know it. I thought I was for my vanilla
• 1:01:15
  self. I thought I was pretty, you
• 1:01:18
  know, I thought it was a hot commodity.
• 1:01:20
  I was like, yeah, no, I was boring.
• 1:01:22
  I was boring as fuck. You.
• 1:01:27
  Know well, you know I always feel like so many men they look
• 1:01:31
  at porn and they think oh this is it you know this is how you
• 1:01:35
  do it and it's like no honey, no, that's that's not.
• 1:01:42
  The, the one PSA I have to put out there is men, please stop
• 1:01:48
  doing the fast and Furious windshield wiper on my clit.
• 1:01:53
  It's, I know you see these women doing it.
• 1:02:00
  It's performative. She really did not just stick
• 1:02:04
  her hand down there or he did not just put his hand down there
• 1:02:07
  for three seconds at, you know, three times the speed and she
• 1:02:11
  came. It doesn't work like that.
• 1:02:14
  I wish it did. I tell you, I, I, I've tried,
• 1:02:18
  I've given it the old college try.
• 1:02:19
  I'm still trying for that, for it to be that fast.
• 1:02:23
  It you know, it, it's, I've managed to get it pretty fast if
• 1:02:28
  I'm super horny and juiced up, but it's not, it's not that .03
• 1:02:32
  seconds that they're showing you.
• 1:02:33
  No. And usually that that that type
• 1:02:38
  of stroking pattern really doesn't feel that great anyway.
• 1:02:41
  The way you know, they don't get it.
• 1:02:44
  So that would be my that would be my knock against porn is that
• 1:02:50
  it just is performative and you need to view it the same way you
• 1:02:55
  would if you watched a Disney movie or a cartoon that was
• 1:03:00
  pornographic, let's say a Disney porn.
• 1:03:03
  It's just performative. It's not real.
• 1:03:07
  It's entirely true. Yeah.
• 1:03:09
  Have you interviewed? I've interviewed a bunch of porn
• 1:03:11
  stars. I mean, they just tell you like,
• 1:03:13
  those are uncomfortable. It's not, you know, it's not
• 1:03:16
  contiguous. I mean, there's nothing, there's
• 1:03:19
  nothing sexy about it. It just they take some sexy
• 1:03:23
  clips and they put them all together, you know?
• 1:03:25
  There is a really wonderful guy. He's a veteran, his name is
• 1:03:29
  Sergeant Miles and him and his girlfriend, they primarily do
• 1:03:35
  porn that's more or less it looks like it's in a dungeon
• 1:03:39
  type setting because it's specific to BDSM and he's very
• 1:03:45
  bisexual. So he does a lot of guy on guy,
• 1:03:47
  which I love watching. He's not my kind of guy.
• 1:03:51
  I mean, he's like really muscular, but he's all hairy.
• 1:03:54
  So he's kind of like this muscular bear kind of look to
• 1:03:58
  him. But he's very nice.
• 1:04:00
  And I interviewed them both a few years ago and but they were
• 1:04:04
  talking about it and she's, she's beautiful.
• 1:04:05
  She's a beautiful blonde, you know, big fake titties.
• 1:04:08
  And I mean, she's she's she could win a, excuse me, an Oscar
• 1:04:14
  for some of her performances. It was just like, boom, you
• 1:04:17
  know, on point. She's a great submissive on
• 1:04:19
  camera. And then he, of course, doms her
• 1:04:24
  and other men. So again, I get to see Guy on
• 1:04:27
  Guy, and it's like, oh, Sergeant Miles, Woof.
• 1:04:30
  Yeah, yeah. You know.
• 1:04:34
  Yeah. You know, so I, I really I need
• 1:04:38
  to interview them again but. Yeah.
• 1:04:42
  But yeah, I going back to that. What kind of porn do you like to
• 1:04:46
  watch? Porn with your partners or by
• 1:04:48
  yourself? Both, yeah, OK.
• 1:04:51
  What kind of you get into? Oh my gosh, I get into the
• 1:04:55
  weirdest stuff. We all do.
• 1:04:59
  Sometimes it's weird. I mean, I, I hope other people
• 1:05:04
  have this same porn porn process I have or get stuck in the same
• 1:05:08
  porn loop I get stuck in. When you go to masturbate and
• 1:05:11
  you're like, OK, you want to put something on and you spend all
• 1:05:13
  your time looking for something and you can't quite you're like,
• 1:05:17
  no, you get 5 minutes into it. You're like no, this isn't it.
• 1:05:19
  And and you're switching them just like, OK, I've got to
• 1:05:22
  control my porn ADD because it's not working for me.
• 1:05:25
  I'm I'm not accomplishing what I need to.
• 1:05:27
  I need to just settle on something.
• 1:05:29
  So then you, you know, you settle on something.
• 1:05:31
  But I like, Oh my gosh, it varies.
• 1:05:34
  So right now the what's running through my porn go to loop is
• 1:05:40
  I've been into scissoring and double headed dildos.
• 1:05:46
  Women women fucking each other with a double headed dildo.
• 1:05:49
  I love the cupcake stuff. I was in a throuple for a while
• 1:05:56
  and I was dominant over her. I love that.
• 1:06:02
  And so I'll, I'll, if I, if that me and a girl evolves into which
• 1:06:08
  I've never, I, I'm not bisexual, but I, I like watching the, you
• 1:06:12
  know, I like sometimes if I'm in the mood for it, it's really
• 1:06:14
  turning me on. And lately it has been and then
• 1:06:16
  it'll evolve to a guy being with us.
• 1:06:18
  But then she has to be submissive and I like to make
• 1:06:21
  her suck my clit while the guy's fucking me and we're just using
• 1:06:27
  her like our little play toy. Oh yeah.
• 1:06:30
  And then I get into the because another partner of mine was
• 1:06:35
  really into and this again, something I never thought I'd be
• 1:06:39
  into is the whole like mommy stuff.
• 1:06:44
  Oh shit. Into the breastfeeding and
• 1:06:47
  suckling, yes. And Oh my God, it feels really
• 1:06:52
  good. And I love because I love my
• 1:06:54
  nipple suck. I mean, that's like, you know,
• 1:06:55
  that's the clit upstairs. And.
• 1:06:59
  He was getting into, I mean, just like getting into it.
• 1:07:03
  And then he really want, you know, he likes me to pee on him
• 1:07:06
  and he likes, you know, to get in the shower.
• 1:07:08
  And again, you start, see, you start going down these roads
• 1:07:11
  with guys and you're like, they're so, so, you know, and so
• 1:07:15
  then after I was like, oh, he likes this, he likes this the
• 1:07:19
  suckling and he let out a mommy. And so I ran with that, you
• 1:07:23
  know, I was just like, Oh yeah, I ran with that.
• 1:07:25
  We had that was a fun, that was a really good fuck.
• 1:07:28
  I, I just jumped out of my, my porn fantasies into real life.
• 1:07:32
  That was that. OK, just just to clarify.
• 1:07:35
  But so because of that experience, so some of the porn
• 1:07:38
  I will seek out is the breast, you know, like when the when the
• 1:07:41
  when the guy's sucking on her tits and she's got lactating,
• 1:07:46
  like the I just got fixated on the lactating board.
• 1:07:49
  I'm like, that's so fucking hot. Yes.
• 1:07:53
  And then a lot of times I like that, you know, strictly taboo,
• 1:07:59
  like, you know, stepdaughty or stepdaughter daddy stuff or, you
• 1:08:04
  know, mom and stepson kind of thing or nephew or whatever,
• 1:08:08
  like, you know, or his his friend.
• 1:08:13
  Yeah, I know. I mean.
• 1:08:15
  Just. Down all kinds of rabbit holes.
• 1:08:19
  You know what the strangest thing is, is I usually don't
• 1:08:22
  watch BDSM porno because usually I find it unsatisfactory.
• 1:08:30
  Yeah, it's true. It's it's too fake.
• 1:08:34
  It's too fake. Yeah, you know, And I'm like,
• 1:08:37
  damn it, I don't I don't want to watch it so I can re watch me
• 1:08:42
  with old partners, you know, on our I can watch my own porn if I
• 1:08:46
  want to see, you know, if I want to see that relive that.
• 1:08:49
  But yeah, so that's kind of where my like.
• 1:08:54
  And then sometimes I get sometimes it's I'm all BBC
• 1:08:57
  stuff, you know, like when you're talking, we're back, back
• 1:08:59
  when we're talking about big Dicks, like there's a I'll get
• 1:09:01
  into ABBC fetish, you know, and just like really, really want
• 1:09:08
  big black cock. And I had a partner, chef W who
• 1:09:13
  was a chef, a really good one and would cook for me all the
• 1:09:17
  time. And then he would go down on me
• 1:09:19
  and fuck me with that big Dick. Oh my God, Amazing, right.
• 1:09:26
  And there is something about there is something about the
• 1:09:30
  taboo of the races that just turns me on.
• 1:09:34
  It was just it. Yeah, it's just that skin
• 1:09:36
  difference. It's something you know.
• 1:09:38
  It's about the it's the aesthetic.
• 1:09:41
  When I see his, you know, his big black cock going into my and
• 1:09:46
  I have really light skin. You have light skin.
• 1:09:48
  Beautiful, by the way. Yeah, I always, I noticed that
• 1:09:52
  like women that take care of their skin.
• 1:09:53
  I'm like, I pay attention to all the hands, feet, I pay attention
• 1:09:56
  to all this stuff. But yeah, I would.
• 1:10:01
  I love the contrast. I loved filming it in the
• 1:10:04
  pictures, you know when you see just my white white skin and his
• 1:10:09
  big black Dick. Oh yeah.
• 1:10:12
  So much fun. I know it's getting hot and
• 1:10:15
  steamy in here. It's.
• 1:10:18
  Like it's going to be hard for me to concentrate after this.
• 1:10:20
  I'm like, what am I going to do? I know, well, you know, back to
• 1:10:23
  the whole porn watching and, you know, your specific genres, I'm
• 1:10:27
  like you, you know, you got to have this certain need for
• 1:10:31
  certain things. And I don't know it, you know,
• 1:10:33
  it's just the day that we have that we can go back to that
• 1:10:36
  feeling of what we experienced. But I always go through when I'm
• 1:10:40
  not, you know, horny and I know that I can't masturbate or have
• 1:10:45
  sex. So I go through porn just at
• 1:10:48
  random and be like, OK, let's find some good stuff because
• 1:10:51
  I'll look up, you know, because I'm like you.
• 1:10:53
  I'm like, oh, sometimes the fisting and gyno porn, it can be
• 1:10:56
  really hot, you know, and she'll be submissive.
• 1:10:59
  But I like that because I I dominate women at times too.
• 1:11:03
  Yeah, but I'm like, I mean, I'm going to go through, I'm going
• 1:11:06
  to save it. And at the same time I'm like,
• 1:11:11
  what else am I going to look at, you know?
• 1:11:12
  So then it just, it starts this whole whirlwind.
• 1:11:15
  But but when I go through fisting, if I come across a
• 1:11:20
  fucking prolapse, I'm like oh God.
• 1:11:22
  Oh God, Oh God. Oh God no.
• 1:11:24
  No, well, I don't want to see it.
• 1:11:30
  I know. And then it's like, Boner's
• 1:11:33
  gone. You know what?
• 1:11:35
  But that reaction that is the it's the same like where your
• 1:11:38
  corneas are peeling. It's the same thing as that
• 1:11:44
  image is the same as opening up your DMS and getting an
• 1:11:48
  unsolicited Dick pic. Same thing.
• 1:11:49
  It's oh, it's like I get the same reaction as a prolapse
• 1:11:53
  anus. That's a that.
• 1:11:55
  Thank you for helping me realize that.
• 1:11:57
  Yes, just came back awful. The two things I don't want to
• 1:12:01
  see. No.
• 1:12:03
  Unsolicited prolapsed anus. Never.
• 1:12:07
  If I want to see either of those two, I will ask.
• 1:12:09
  I promise. Oh, God, God.
• 1:12:12
  And, you know, interesting, right?
• 1:12:20
  I'm gonna have to try to get that.
• 1:12:21
  Image out of my head. Trust me, it's, yeah, it's
• 1:12:25
  there. And I hate it.
• 1:12:26
  I really do. I'm like you, though.
• 1:12:28
  I'm going to go back to BDSM because you're really just
• 1:12:32
  delving into it in the past couple years.
• 1:12:34
  You know, I've obviously done this for a very long time.
• 1:12:38
  Yeah. But you know, I've really found,
• 1:12:41
  and I said this often, I love it when we can see something like
• 1:12:47
  50 Shades of Grey come out, you know, 10-15 years ago.
• 1:12:50
  And it just starts bringing more BDSM to normalize it and, you
• 1:12:55
  know, bring it out. And I love when they can do
• 1:12:57
  that, you know, with certain aspects of sex that again, they
• 1:13:01
  normalize it. They make they make everything
• 1:13:05
  seem just real and not so taboo. And you know, when I, I listened
• 1:13:12
  to some of your episodes, I was like, you know, I wonder if
• 1:13:16
  you've seen that movie with Nicole Kidman, baby girl,
• 1:13:20
  because you reminded me so much of her when you first started
• 1:13:23
  and you were talking about your journey.
• 1:13:25
  And then when you're like, you know, I really feel safe with a
• 1:13:28
  dominant man. You know, just a lot of these
• 1:13:30
  statements kind of resonated with me.
• 1:13:32
  And I was like, if you haven't seen it, you really need to
• 1:13:34
  watch it because. I I think I did see that.
• 1:13:36
  I think I had and yeah. Was she finally?
• 1:13:40
  Wasn't she married? She was married.
• 1:13:42
  To not Andy Garcia. Oh goodness, my friend had sex
• 1:13:50
  with him. Tonio Banderas.
• 1:13:56
  Oh, oh, oh, OK yes, yes, that's right.
• 1:14:01
  OK. And she right.
• 1:14:03
  And she had found that she needed BDS that she needed.
• 1:14:08
  She needed to be submissive and he he couldn't do it for her.
• 1:14:12
  Yeah, Yeah. Such a great movie.
• 1:14:14
  I know, I know, I often think about that, you know, could I be
• 1:14:18
  in a vanilla relationship again, you know, long term after this
• 1:14:23
  and they, they weren't into this stuff.
• 1:14:26
  Could I, could I go back to the vanilla route?
• 1:14:30
  And I, I don't know. I mean, I don't want to, I think
• 1:14:37
  the dominance is kind of natural in a man.
• 1:14:40
  I think that you can, you can, I don't want to say exploit that.
• 1:14:43
  I kind of feel like you can bring that out in a partner.
• 1:14:46
  You can encourage it if and you won't get the same experience,
• 1:14:50
  but you could get some choking and slapping and you know, just
• 1:14:54
  more forceful, rough, probably aggressive sex.
• 1:15:01
  Yeah, but you won't get that full on, you know, consent and
• 1:15:04
  non consent. You're like, I'm going to be
• 1:15:06
  great. But also just that, yeah, I
• 1:15:11
  mean, I like it. I like the whole, I want to, I
• 1:15:13
  want to submit, I want to do that for him.
• 1:15:15
  And because now, you know, because he takes on the
• 1:15:18
  responsibility of me, you know, and that's a big job.
• 1:15:22
  And I like that, that he's looking out for me, taking care
• 1:15:24
  of me and all that. That's just, that's where,
• 1:15:31
  that's where, yeah, that's my happy place.
• 1:15:33
  So it'd be really hard. I don't know.
• 1:15:37
  And I just don't know if I don't know if you'd have.
• 1:15:41
  What I find is that men that are really that are true dominance
• 1:15:45
  in the bedroom, they know what they understand it.
• 1:15:48
  They're great guys to be in relationships with outside of
• 1:15:54
  the bedroom because they have all those masculine qualities
• 1:15:58
  and the, you know, chivalrous nature and all that.
• 1:16:00
  Just naturally it aligns with that vibe.
• 1:16:02
  So yeah, yeah, I don't know. I might, it might be hard.
• 1:16:07
  I don't think I probably couldn't.
• 1:16:09
  Yeah, I'm just telling you can't.
• 1:16:11
  Yeah, yeah, I would be. I got too long to live without
• 1:16:16
  it. Yeah.
• 1:16:18
  It's sad, isn't it? Yeah, I'm interested.
• 1:16:20
  It'd be too long to live without it, so probably not.
• 1:16:23
  Yeah, goodness gracious. You don't have to do that
• 1:16:26
  because you're married and you have your.
• 1:16:28
  I do, I do married. We met in 2012 and we were
• 1:16:35
  engaged. I, I always tell the, the fun
• 1:16:38
  little story. But when we met, it was one of
• 1:16:44
  those situations where we have always had amazing sex.
• 1:16:47
  Yeah. And I was giving him a blowjob
• 1:16:51
  and I, I was literally doing it so good.
• 1:16:55
  I love doing it and I love doing it with him.
• 1:16:58
  And he came so hard his cum shot out of my nose.
• 1:17:03
  Oh my God. And that has never happened.
• 1:17:06
  And when that happened, I was like, oh wow.
• 1:17:10
  That's a lot of force. It was, it was a lot of force.
• 1:17:12
  And you know, I was like, oh, you know, that's that's great.
• 1:17:17
  And he's like, holy shit. And you know, he went back and
• 1:17:20
  he was telling some of his friends and Co workers and
• 1:17:23
  they're like you're going to marry her.
• 1:17:24
  And he's like, no, I'm not, no, I'm not.
• 1:17:27
  Two months later we were engaged, you know.
• 1:17:30
  Well, I have kind of a similar story, except Sam's the
• 1:17:33
  engagement afterwards. But my my first dominant he the
• 1:17:38
  first time we had sex and this is the our very first hookup.
• 1:17:44
  And I mean, he fucking rocked my world like it was crazy.
• 1:17:48
  He had me sporting, he had my body doing things.
• 1:17:50
  I didn't even know what to do. He knew my body better than me.
• 1:17:51
  It was unbelievable. But when he finally, you know,
• 1:17:54
  after many an orgasm for me, when he decided he was going to
• 1:17:58
  come, you know, and he pulls out and this is the first time we're
• 1:18:01
  ever having sex. We were using condoms.
• 1:18:02
  He kicks the condom off and, you know, he starts to ejaculate and
• 1:18:06
  he's down by my pussy, you know, going to just cum on the top of
• 1:18:10
  my pussy. It shoots all the way up from
• 1:18:13
  down there up my nose. So I it didn't go in my throat
• 1:18:17
  and out my nose, but I had it go up my nose too.
• 1:18:19
  Maybe there's something to that isn't.
• 1:18:24
  That great. Good ones like maybe my.
• 1:18:29
  Showman. No, seriously, I was like, and I
• 1:18:32
  was not. I mean, I'd never had it.
• 1:18:34
  He it shot out so forcefully. It went in a straight shot.
• 1:18:39
  Didn't even get any wind resistance and it went right up
• 1:18:42
  my nose from my pussy to my nostril.
• 1:18:46
  Isn't that crazy? That's crazy.
• 1:18:48
  That's like the length of my arm, you know, I mean, that's,
• 1:18:51
  that's not short distance and just went right up there.
• 1:18:53
  I was like, oh, you know, you felt like you got water up your
• 1:18:56
  nose. Great.
• 1:19:01
  Oh. Lord yeah.
• 1:19:03
  So that is fun. There's another thing we have in
• 1:19:05
  common. We had a couple things in
• 1:19:06
  common. I was picking we.
• 1:19:08
  We have a lot of things in good little.
• 1:19:10
  Things I know I'm like, now I have to come meet you for sure.
• 1:19:15
  I have to come to one of your parties for sure.
• 1:19:16
  Please do. Please do, I would love that.
• 1:19:19
  We do all sorts of themes, I tell you.
• 1:19:21
  And you know, we have so much fun.
• 1:19:24
  I, you know, I tell this to to a lot of people.
• 1:19:27
  I did this steampunk circus. It's been about two or three
• 1:19:31
  years ago. Oh, that would be so.
• 1:19:32
  Much fun. Oh my, it was the funnest time.
• 1:19:35
  I love because I love the costumes I love.
• 1:19:37
  So great. Outfits and Oh yeah, I'm all
• 1:19:39
  about it. You know, and I, I love it when
• 1:19:41
  people can take it to where they want to come on and get
• 1:19:45
  completely dressed up and then they want to, you know, walk
• 1:19:47
  around naked and, you know, fought, you know.
• 1:19:51
  Yes. But it feels so much like a
• 1:19:53
  party, you know, just a regular party.
• 1:19:56
  And I always tell people, you know, it's just a regular adult
• 1:19:59
  party, and adult things will happen.
• 1:20:01
  You don't have to participate. You don't have to watch.
• 1:20:04
  You can be, you know, listening to the band or the DJ or, you
• 1:20:08
  know, eating and hanging out with friends.
• 1:20:10
  But there's going to be sex at the parties, you know?
• 1:20:14
  I know I always tell people that too.
• 1:20:15
  I say when people want suggestions on how to spice
• 1:20:19
  things up, I'm like, what a sex club.
• 1:20:22
  Yeah, every occurs to them. And I, you know, I just think
• 1:20:25
  nobody's going to people are not going to be approaching you.
• 1:20:27
  You can, I mean, they might and you just let them know you're
• 1:20:29
  just there to, you know, you guys are just together doing
• 1:20:32
  your own thing. Know people are very, very
• 1:20:34
  polite, but it's really fun and you can go and check it out.
• 1:20:39
  And the worst case scenario is that both of you are going to
• 1:20:41
  get so horned up and you're going to fuck each other's
• 1:20:43
  brains out afterwards. Or maybe you take a step and you
• 1:20:47
  decide to go in one of the rooms and fuck there.
• 1:20:49
  Don't have to let anybody watch you.
• 1:20:50
  But maybe, you know, just being in that environment when you're
• 1:20:53
  surrounded by that sexual energy, you feel it and it's,
• 1:20:56
  it's, it's hot. I mean, I, when I went, I left
• 1:21:01
  the door open. I was like, get a load of this.
• 1:21:04
  You're going to want to watch me fuck this or watch this guy fuck
• 1:21:07
  me because he's good and I'm good and we're going to put on a
• 1:21:10
  show that's awesome and it's hot, you know?
• 1:21:15
  And there's another thing that I never would have known.
• 1:21:17
  I never would have known that I like people watching me.
• 1:21:20
  You know? That's great.
• 1:21:23
  Yeah. I mean, I it's weird.
• 1:21:24
  It's like this with that partner under that circumstance.
• 1:21:27
  Yeah, I'm with him. I feel totally safe.
• 1:21:28
  But you bet, you know, look at look at this.
• 1:21:31
  And I like the fact knowing turns me on.
• 1:21:33
  Knowing that this guy's watching, wishing he was my
• 1:21:37
  partner. Fuck, yeah.
• 1:21:39
  That is. I love it.
• 1:21:42
  Yeah. And they're and they're right
• 1:21:44
  there, you know? They're, they're they're right
• 1:21:46
  there. You can see them.
• 1:21:48
  You can almost feel them breathing on you.
• 1:21:50
  Oh yeah. Yeah, I love it.
• 1:21:53
  But and but you don't have to go that far.
• 1:21:54
  I'm just saying like to people, you know, just going and being
• 1:21:57
  in that environment with your partner, you're going to have a
• 1:22:01
  you're, you're going to have a great time.
• 1:22:02
  Yeah. It's so.
• 1:22:03
  Freeing and we'll open the door to start spicing things up.
• 1:22:07
  Absolutely. Yeah.
• 1:22:08
  So five years from now, well, I don't believe I'll be doing the
• 1:22:15
  podcast, but stranger things could happen.
• 1:22:19
  I, but I definitely, you know, I hope I am with somebody really
• 1:22:27
  fun and sexy and that likes to explore and stay, you know, and
• 1:22:32
  that's curious like me. And I'm sure I'll be working on
• 1:22:39
  aspects of my business and just setting new goals.
• 1:22:43
  I mean, just like I always am. But I don't know that I have
• 1:22:46
  like a super big plan for the next 5 years other than just to
• 1:22:50
  keep, you know, keep doing the podcast for the at least of the
• 1:22:54
  10th season, grow and expand my audience.
• 1:22:56
  Hopefully people hear listen to it for years to come because I
• 1:22:59
  think the, the, the advice is going to stay practical and the
• 1:23:03
  same, you know, forever. It's never going to be, it's
• 1:23:07
  never going to be a bad idea to have great sex with your
• 1:23:10
  partner. I don't know, call me crazy.
• 1:23:13
  I don't know when that would be. I don't know what kind of planet
• 1:23:15
  we'd be living on or what would have to happen in the world
• 1:23:17
  where that would be a bad idea. And yeah.
• 1:23:21
  And just, you know, always trying to do my best and be
• 1:23:26
  better every year. That's what matters, right?
• 1:23:29
  Yep. Yep.
• 1:23:30
  Absolutely. Well, Layla, we'll call it here.
• 1:23:35
  This has been awesome. I've enjoyed honestly.
• 1:23:38
  Thank you. Thank you so much for having me
• 1:23:40
  on. And if anybody wants to check me
• 1:23:42
  out, you can go to they can listen to the Curious Girl
• 1:23:45
  Diaries wherever you listen to podcasts, or you can check out
• 1:23:47
  my website, curiousgirldiaries.com.
• 1:23:50
  Well, I'm certainly going to post all those links, all right.
• 1:23:54
  And yeah, I look forward to chatting again.
• 1:23:57
  We're going to have to do this another.
• 1:23:58
  Day, I know, definitely. I mean, we had, we could just,
• 1:24:00
  we could do a whole episode on just specific subjects.
• 1:24:03
  Wait. Oh my God.
• 1:24:04
  Yeah, we could do. So much, so much.
• 1:24:07
  There's so much to talk about. That's why.
• 1:24:09
  That's why I'm still talking about sex 10 years later.
• 1:24:13
  It's a never ending supply of content.
• 1:24:17
  Absolutely. Well, until then, this has been
• 1:24:21
  the latest episode of Call Me Mistress.
• 1:24:25
  Thank you. Bye.
• 1:24:26
  Thank you. Bye.
• 1:25:22
  Music.