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23. The Hidden Cost of Caregiving: Smart Money Moves for the Sandwich Generation · Talk Wealthy To Me

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Speaker 1: Let's welcome talk Welcome we Talk Wealthy to Me. I'm
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Speaker 1: Michelle Taylor, founder of Women and Well and Wealth. From
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Speaker 1: breaking money myths to building wealth and achieving financial freedom.
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Speaker 1: We're here to empower you to create your own path
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Speaker 1: path Talk Wealth. Now, join the conversation and let's change
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Speaker 1: the way women think and feel about money. Are you ready? Hi, friends,
0:28
Speaker 1: welcome back to Talk Wealthy to Me. I am your host,
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Speaker 1: Michelle Taylor, and today we are talking about something that
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Speaker 1: I think so many people can either relate to or
0:38
Speaker 1: know somebody who has been through this, and that is
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Speaker 1: the invisible crisis that so many women face around being
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Speaker 1: a caregiver. Oftentimes we hear this referred to as the
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Speaker 1: Sandwich generation, where women are taking care of both young
0:54
Speaker 1: kids and aging parents, and it has a massive impact
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Speaker 1: on your own overall financial wellness. There is a Columbia
1:03
Speaker 1: University study that says that women lose half of their
1:07
Speaker 1: income once they decide to stay at home or become
1:10
Speaker 1: a caregiver. That's staggering, that's really hard to overcome, and
1:15
Speaker 1: statistically it is more likely to impact women. So just
1:20
Speaker 1: a couple of things to consider. One, we never know
1:24
Speaker 1: when taking care of someone is going to be asked
1:27
Speaker 1: or required of us. Obviously, having kids, that's a decision,
1:32
Speaker 1: but oftentimes people have not planned or thought about who
1:36
Speaker 1: will take care of them if something goes wrong, especially
1:40
Speaker 1: our parents. So seventy five percent of all caregivers lose
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Speaker 1: an average of three hundred and twenty four thousand dollars
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Speaker 1: in lifetime earnings. That's insane. And not only are they
1:54
Speaker 1: losing that income potential, but when they go back into
1:58
Speaker 1: the workforce oftentimes five steps behind with technology or have
2:04
Speaker 1: lost the credibility of being an industry leader that they
2:08
Speaker 1: may have been able to claim before they left. This
2:12
Speaker 1: is critical. I know in my life, my grandmother was
2:17
Speaker 1: tasked with taking care of my grandfather when he was
2:21
Speaker 1: diagnosed with MS, and she had a special needs daughter,
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Speaker 1: my aunt, the middle child, is blind and mentally handicapped,
2:31
Speaker 1: and they had to quickly pivot and plan around how
2:36
Speaker 1: to make life work with these new and I hate
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Speaker 1: to say burdens, but new financial burden of education for
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Speaker 1: my aunt who needed a little bit more, and medical expenses.
2:51
Speaker 1: So today, what I would love to do is spend
2:54
Speaker 1: some time diving in and figuring out how to plan
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Speaker 1: for this, how to to try and at least chip
3:02
Speaker 1: away at some of the financial implications of it, because
3:06
Speaker 1: at the end of the day, you can't build wealth
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Speaker 1: in a system that doesn't account for your invisible labor costs.
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Speaker 1: But you can plan ahead, you can protect your future
3:17
Speaker 1: and still show up for the people that you love,
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Speaker 1: and that is the most important thing, because this is
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Speaker 1: a crisis that no one is really talking about. It's
3:26
Speaker 1: one that creeps in quietly through love, obligation, and responsibility,
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Speaker 1: things that women are often faced with and have no
3:35
Speaker 1: solution to. Hopefully we can change a little bit of
3:38
Speaker 1: that today. So what does caregiving include? That can be children, aging, parents,
3:45
Speaker 1: six spouses, special needs family members, anybody that requires your
3:51
Speaker 1: time and potentially financial contributions to be shifted. And obviously
3:58
Speaker 1: there's so much in life that we can't play for
4:00
Speaker 1: and for a lot of these instances, we are faced
4:04
Speaker 1: with these things totally unexpectedly and need to be prepared
4:08
Speaker 1: for the unexpected at all times. The financial toll that
4:13
Speaker 1: shows up with these instances is significant. Lost income from
4:20
Speaker 1: reduced work hours is obviously one aspect, but totally stepping
4:25
Speaker 1: out of the workforces another. Now I know a lot
4:27
Speaker 1: of you listening may know somebody that has chosen to
4:30
Speaker 1: be a stay at home mom, and I think that
4:33
Speaker 1: that's amazing. It's not because they are forced to, but
4:39
Speaker 1: because so many of the women that we know and
4:42
Speaker 1: respect and love that are choosing that path for their
4:44
Speaker 1: family are doing just that. They are choosing to be
4:47
Speaker 1: at home and that is getting even more and more
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Speaker 1: popular as time goes on, which I think is an
4:54
Speaker 1: amazing thing to try and do. However, there are things
5:00
Speaker 1: that you can do to prepare for that. If you
5:02
Speaker 1: are thinking about potentially having a family, or if you
5:08
Speaker 1: are in the workforce and realizing that you don't want
5:12
Speaker 1: to drop off your kiddo at daycare, not only are
5:16
Speaker 1: you missing time in the workforce so lost income that
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Speaker 1: you can never recoup, but also, ladies, we're missing out
5:23
Speaker 1: and contributing to retirement accounts. And that's something that oftentimes
5:28
Speaker 1: people aren't thinking about. When they're considering can our family
5:32
Speaker 1: run on its own with one income, They're often not
5:37
Speaker 1: considering that an employer is matching their contributions to a
5:43
Speaker 1: retirement account, and certainly that's nothing that we can make
5:46
Speaker 1: up for. So there are a lot of things to
5:49
Speaker 1: think through. Also, the out of cost spending that comes
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Speaker 1: with staying at home, either to take care of kids
5:57
Speaker 1: or a loved one, and that can show up ways
6:00
Speaker 1: of transportation, medication, supplies, traveling, different insurances that need to
6:07
Speaker 1: be considered. So there's a lot and starting to have
6:12
Speaker 1: the conversations and normalizing conversations around money and unexpected not
6:19
Speaker 1: fun aspects of planning is even lower on the totem
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Speaker 1: pole than sitting down with someone that you care about
6:26
Speaker 1: and talking about like what you're spending every month, and
6:29
Speaker 1: that is where we need to do better. Right, So
6:34
Speaker 1: there's a huge emotional toll that cloud's decision making, whether
6:39
Speaker 1: it's guilt, obligation, lack of boundaries. A lot of us
6:44
Speaker 1: are asked to take care of someone that took care
6:48
Speaker 1: of us, and it's really hard to say no to
6:52
Speaker 1: an aging or sick parent or spouse that needs the
6:56
Speaker 1: extra attention or care. And there there is no right
7:00
Speaker 1: or wrong answer here. It truly comes down to who
7:04
Speaker 1: should be staying home with this loved one and what
7:09
Speaker 1: can we do to make sure that you're planning for
7:13
Speaker 1: time outside of the workforce. And I think that it
7:20
Speaker 1: needs to be said also that we've kind of normalized
7:24
Speaker 1: caregiving as being a female duty, but the financial consequence
7:30
Speaker 1: isn't gender neutral. It lands squarely on women's futures. I
7:35
Speaker 1: can't tell you how many times I've encountered a woman
7:39
Speaker 1: that was married and chose to stay home raise her
7:43
Speaker 1: kids and then gets divorced. There's a lot of cost
7:49
Speaker 1: that is hard to actually calculate when she's the one
7:54
Speaker 1: that stayed home for so many years while the partner
7:58
Speaker 1: or husband was out earning money for the family, but
8:03
Speaker 1: also contributing to a retirement that now is only his.
8:08
Speaker 1: So we don't want to look at this as a
8:12
Speaker 1: woman's job. It truly should be a conversation in all
8:18
Speaker 1: situations where there are multiple people sitting down and determining
8:22
Speaker 1: what is best. Maybe you're in a situation where a
8:25
Speaker 1: sibling or another spouse is in a better suited role
8:31
Speaker 1: to step back and work from home and help take
8:34
Speaker 1: some of these responsibilities on, But the money conversation needs
8:39
Speaker 1: to happen when you're determining who is going to be
8:42
Speaker 1: stepping into this caregiving role. Don't automatically assume because you're
8:46
Speaker 1: the daughter or the mom, that it should fall on you.
8:50
Speaker 1: Let's really try and not let emotion cloud the decision
8:57
Speaker 1: making process when it comes to the implications of what
9:01
Speaker 1: this will look like. So where do we start? It
9:04
Speaker 1: all starts with awareness, conversation, and planning. Even if it's
9:09
Speaker 1: an informal arrangement that you're in where you're just driving
9:15
Speaker 1: a little bit out of your way to go help
9:17
Speaker 1: somebody or a neighbor, or you're working a half day
9:20
Speaker 1: maybe as a parent, you want to think through, even
9:24
Speaker 1: in those instances, the financial adjustments that need to be
9:28
Speaker 1: made to account for the time that you are taking
9:32
Speaker 1: away from income generating activities. You want to make sure
9:36
Speaker 1: that you're building that care plan, have the conversation add
9:41
Speaker 1: the cost of caregiving to your budget, and even if
9:45
Speaker 1: it's as low as just tolls and gas, you want
9:48
Speaker 1: to think through what you can do to get in
9:51
Speaker 1: front of those things. You also want to set up
9:54
Speaker 1: a care giving emergency fund so oftentime with anybody that
10:01
Speaker 1: is requiring the assistance of someone else, there are going
10:05
Speaker 1: to be unexpected things that happen that you need to
10:07
Speaker 1: be prepared for. I would say that one of the
10:10
Speaker 1: easiest ways to consider this is for if you're staying
10:14
Speaker 1: home with your kids, and let's say that over time
10:18
Speaker 1: you realize that there are some extra resources that are needed,
10:22
Speaker 1: or even if it's just having somebody come in to
10:25
Speaker 1: help because you have other children that are in activities
10:29
Speaker 1: and then need to plan for going out to participate
10:33
Speaker 1: in those activities, and you have a little or one
10:34
Speaker 1: at home, think through what that will look like. Worst
10:38
Speaker 1: case scenario, you are over prepared and have a little
10:42
Speaker 1: bit extra money every single month to do something with.
10:46
Speaker 1: But that is not a bad thing, ladies. We want
10:50
Speaker 1: to make sure we're thinking through all of the things
10:53
Speaker 1: that can happen and planning for them in advance. The
10:57
Speaker 1: next piece is something that is not a time of fun, boring,
11:01
Speaker 1: and nobody likes to talk about insurances, but we need
11:05
Speaker 1: to in this case. So I'm not talking about life
11:09
Speaker 1: insurance because quite frankly, that worst case scenario is that
11:13
Speaker 1: person is no longer here. But what we do need
11:16
Speaker 1: to spend some time thinking about is encouraging the people
11:20
Speaker 1: in your life that may need you, the parents, the
11:23
Speaker 1: aunts and uncles, grandparents, spouses. Make sure that when you're
11:29
Speaker 1: making those elections with your employer or you are faced
11:35
Speaker 1: with the option of doing it on your own, you're
11:38
Speaker 1: looking at things like short and long term disability. Now,
11:42
Speaker 1: I know this is a cost that is an additional
11:45
Speaker 1: line item in your financial plan, but the reward of
11:51
Speaker 1: it will be exponential if it's ever needed. So I
11:56
Speaker 1: would say that during those real income produce years where
12:01
Speaker 1: you are at the height of your career, we want
12:03
Speaker 1: to protect that. So looking into both short and long
12:07
Speaker 1: term disability is really important. Obviously, a lot of you
12:11
Speaker 1: ladies out there are probably familiar with short term disability
12:15
Speaker 1: because of being pregnant, and that is a helpful thing
12:18
Speaker 1: to have. But just like in the title, short term
12:22
Speaker 1: is really only going to cover you for a couple
12:24
Speaker 1: of months, and we need to be prepared for something
12:27
Speaker 1: a little bit bigger. Long term disability can cover anything
12:30
Speaker 1: from terrible migraines that keep you at home for several
12:36
Speaker 1: hours and things that will impact your ability to work.
12:40
Speaker 1: You want to think through those and I know that
12:42
Speaker 1: it's adding an additional cost, but I can assure you
12:46
Speaker 1: it'll be the best dollar you ever spent if something
12:48
Speaker 1: happens that's not in your control. I've had clients that
12:51
Speaker 1: have gone on disability claim for vertigo. I mean, it
12:55
Speaker 1: doesn't have to be something tragic, and I think that
12:57
Speaker 1: that's what we need to remember would be suffering from that.
13:01
Speaker 1: For example, a spouse would need assistance, and it would
13:05
Speaker 1: impact potentially your ability to work a full time role
13:11
Speaker 1: outside of the home. So think through those things. Make
13:14
Speaker 1: sure that you've got the coverage that you need, that
13:17
Speaker 1: at least you've got a financial cushion if something unexpected
13:20
Speaker 1: happens with that. And this is something that for all
13:23
Speaker 1: of you that have parents out there, and quite frankly,
13:27
Speaker 1: when you're sitting down to do your own planning, long
13:30
Speaker 1: term care is a hot topic for me and for
13:35
Speaker 1: so many going back to my grandmother. You know, my
13:38
Speaker 1: grandfather had just sold his business and got this MS
13:43
Speaker 1: diagnosis after retirement, and think goodness that both of them
13:48
Speaker 1: had planned really well for their retirement years because my
13:51
Speaker 1: grandfather did have long term care insurance. Now, this is
13:55
Speaker 1: nothing that would help with my aunt, who was handicapped
13:59
Speaker 1: getting help financially, but it did allow for my grandmother
14:04
Speaker 1: to have in home care without having to take it
14:08
Speaker 1: out of their retirement fund. And this is what I
14:11
Speaker 1: always tell people to think about. It's not just the
14:14
Speaker 1: cost of care, but think about if somebody in this example,
14:17
Speaker 1: my grandfather had a mess, he was home for a
14:20
Speaker 1: decade before he passed away. And if my grandmother had
14:24
Speaker 1: been required to spend down all of the money that
14:27
Speaker 1: they had built their entire life saving when he passed
14:31
Speaker 1: away she was still retired, how was she going to
14:35
Speaker 1: pay for the rest of her life? And she lived
14:37
Speaker 1: for another god I think twenty five years after my
14:40
Speaker 1: grandfather passed. So long term care again is not anything fun,
14:45
Speaker 1: but it is the insurance that covers you in case
14:49
Speaker 1: you need in home care or if you need to
14:52
Speaker 1: go into a facility. For any of you listening that
14:55
Speaker 1: have aging parents, the more you age, the more expensive gets.
15:01
Speaker 1: So I would encourage you to ask the people that
15:03
Speaker 1: may rely on you one day if they've ever considered it.
15:07
Speaker 1: Obviously it's a cost, and with people that are no
15:10
Speaker 1: longer working, those costs are even more costly, right, so
15:16
Speaker 1: think through what it would look like. Encourage them to
15:20
Speaker 1: look into it, because again, it may offset some of
15:24
Speaker 1: the responsibility financially from a child, a spouse, and it
15:31
Speaker 1: would allow you to continue to work because you could
15:33
Speaker 1: have in home care come in. So just to recap,
15:36
Speaker 1: the biggest things on the insurance side you want to
15:39
Speaker 1: look at are short term, long term and long term care.
15:44
Speaker 1: And one more thing about long term care. As people
15:47
Speaker 1: are living longer and medicine and care are getting more advanced,
15:53
Speaker 1: long term care is not as prevalent as it used
15:56
Speaker 1: to be. In you know, the last twenty there used
16:00
Speaker 1: to be I think thirty carriers that would provide it.
16:03
Speaker 1: Now it's down to like three or four. It's wild
16:07
Speaker 1: and that's just because it's no longer profitable. So it's
16:10
Speaker 1: something that you should pay attention to. Me as a
16:14
Speaker 1: in the height of you know, what I would consider
16:18
Speaker 1: my earning life. My husband and I are you know,
16:23
Speaker 1: not spring chickens, but have a long way to go
16:26
Speaker 1: before we retire. We want to protect those years. We
16:28
Speaker 1: already have long term care, and every time that premium
16:33
Speaker 1: is pulled, it stinks because it's extra money that hopefully,
16:38
Speaker 1: knock on wood we'll never have to use. But because
16:40
Speaker 1: we locked it in at such a young age, now
16:43
Speaker 1: it is locked in forever until we cancel it, and
16:47
Speaker 1: much less expensive. So pay attention to those three insurances
16:51
Speaker 1: above all of the other ones that you've probably been
16:54
Speaker 1: inundated with, you know, accidental death and dismemberment, all of
16:58
Speaker 1: those things, the most important are the things that are
17:01
Speaker 1: going to help you while you're still here, not only you,
17:04
Speaker 1: but your children so that the burden doesn't fall on them,
17:08
Speaker 1: and then also for your parents, so that you are
17:10
Speaker 1: protected from both sides of the sandwich, if you will.
17:14
Speaker 1: The other thing is, we want to talk about this early.
17:18
Speaker 1: Talk about it with your siblings. I know in my case,
17:22
Speaker 1: my cousins and I have talked about God forbid, when
17:25
Speaker 1: something happens to my mom, who is now the primary
17:29
Speaker 1: you know, responsible party for my aunt, her sister, that
17:33
Speaker 1: will fall onto us. So we need to be prepared
17:36
Speaker 1: for that and just understand where everything is. So whoever
17:40
Speaker 1: you would share responsibility with, talk to them, talk about
17:45
Speaker 1: it early. So siblings, your parents, spouses, you know, and
17:50
Speaker 1: even from like in a marriage. You want to make
17:53
Speaker 1: sure that you're talking about it about your in laws.
17:55
Speaker 1: Do not count on your spouse to think through these
17:58
Speaker 1: things with their sibiling. Take ownership of the potential that
18:05
Speaker 1: this could happen and help make sure that the conversations
18:09
Speaker 1: are happening while everybody is calm, cool and collected and
18:14
Speaker 1: not faced with a life changing decision. Right. The other
18:19
Speaker 1: thing you want to think about is all of the
18:21
Speaker 1: legal documents that come with this power of attorneys, living wills,
18:25
Speaker 1: health care directives, and that goes into a whole other topic,
18:29
Speaker 1: but just make sure that you understand what those things say.
18:32
Speaker 1: Make sure that the people that maybe are a little
18:36
Speaker 1: bit older have had the conversations with you. You know
18:39
Speaker 1: who's making the health decisions and what that will mean
18:44
Speaker 1: for you and your family. And then obviously plan for
18:48
Speaker 1: your future too. Don't pause on retirement contributions if something
18:54
Speaker 1: happens and you have to step away from the workforce,
18:57
Speaker 1: or if you've chosen to stay home and focus on
19:00
Speaker 1: raising your kids, make sure you're still contributing to an ira.
19:06
Speaker 1: You do not need it to be a four toh
19:07
Speaker 1: one k. As I've mentioned in the past, those two
19:10
Speaker 1: things are taxed the exact same way, at least a
19:15
Speaker 1: traditional ira, So make sure that if you aren't able
19:18
Speaker 1: to contribute to a four toh one k, you're looking
19:20
Speaker 1: at individual retirement accounts that you have access to, which
19:24
Speaker 1: is either a rath ira or a traditional And remember
19:28
Speaker 1: a roth ira is tax free upon distribution. That's always
19:32
Speaker 1: the first place to start if you haven't out earned
19:36
Speaker 1: the ability to do so, because it is based on
19:38
Speaker 1: your income. And remember you can only put as of
19:42
Speaker 1: today's airings seven thousand dollars in an IRA either one,
19:47
Speaker 1: and that number does shift every year because of inflation.
19:51
Speaker 1: So find out how to contribute. If you need help,
19:55
Speaker 1: as always, let me know, send me a message. I
19:59
Speaker 1: will be glad to walk you through that. But don't
20:02
Speaker 1: pause on retirement contributions. It is money that we can
20:05
Speaker 1: never get back and time that we can never get back.
20:08
Speaker 1: And then also think through what side income could look like.
20:13
Speaker 1: What does that hustle look like that you maybe can
20:17
Speaker 1: do at home if you need the extra income, What
20:21
Speaker 1: can you do while your kids are sleeping or at
20:23
Speaker 1: a playdate that may bring in a little bit extra
20:26
Speaker 1: money to make you feel like you're not falling behind.
20:30
Speaker 1: And obviously again to reiterate, the choice to stay home
20:34
Speaker 1: and raise your kids is an awesome, beautiful, amazing choice
20:39
Speaker 1: that so many women don't have the ability to make.
20:42
Speaker 1: So for those who have made that choice, just consider
20:47
Speaker 1: what you should be doing to not lose the power
20:51
Speaker 1: of compounding dollars. And even if that means bringing in
20:55
Speaker 1: a few hundred dollars every single week that you can
20:58
Speaker 1: then put into a retire iron men or investment account,
21:02
Speaker 1: you are still on top of your financial future, and
21:05
Speaker 1: that is a win. The last thing is learned to
21:09
Speaker 1: say no or not right now without shame. If you're
21:14
Speaker 1: in a position where you simply cannot take on the
21:17
Speaker 1: responsibility of staying home or taking care of somebody or helping,
21:24
Speaker 1: there is no shame in admitting that. And I think
21:27
Speaker 1: so many women make the mistake of saying yes when
21:31
Speaker 1: they really want or need to say no. I am
21:34
Speaker 1: guilty of that, and I'm sure most of you listening are.
21:37
Speaker 1: We tend to do things out of the obligation or
21:41
Speaker 1: of just feeling it's the right thing to do, and
21:44
Speaker 1: we need to get better at considering ourselves in these
21:47
Speaker 1: situations and making the decision that is best for us personally, professionally,
21:53
Speaker 1: and financially. So don't be afraid to say no or
21:58
Speaker 1: not right now, and be willing to explore different options together.
22:07
Speaker 1: Be part of the solution, even if it means that
22:10
Speaker 1: you aren't taking a step back, and being part of
22:13
Speaker 1: that solution actively. It's easy to figure out if we
22:17
Speaker 1: are communicating, which is always the conversation that needs to
22:22
Speaker 1: be had, open honest conversations about what's best. Okay, So
22:29
Speaker 1: what do we do if you're in the thick of it.
22:32
Speaker 1: You have already had the conversations or the been forced
22:37
Speaker 1: into this with an unexpected event, and you are a
22:40
Speaker 1: caregiver that has already taken a step back from a
22:44
Speaker 1: career to focus on something else. The best thing that
22:48
Speaker 1: I can tell you, number one is look for support.
22:52
Speaker 1: And I know as a mama to two young kiddos,
22:56
Speaker 1: when they say it takes a village, it really does.
22:58
Speaker 1: Make sure that you've got a good group around you.
23:04
Speaker 1: If it's community groups, playdate groups, even you know, if
23:09
Speaker 1: you're a caregiver for an elderly or sick family member,
23:13
Speaker 1: find a group out there that is filled with people
23:18
Speaker 1: that are going through the same thing you're going through.
23:21
Speaker 1: You know, everyone always says that entrepreneurship is really lonely,
23:24
Speaker 1: but really anything that you're doing without a group around
23:28
Speaker 1: you is going to be lonely. And I know from
23:31
Speaker 1: experience with different family members and friends that have chosen
23:34
Speaker 1: to stay home with their kids. Sometimes you haven't spoken
23:38
Speaker 1: to an adult in twenty four hours, and that can
23:41
Speaker 1: be tricky. Or if you're taking care of somebody that
23:45
Speaker 1: needs you, you know, you're in that mode of caregiver.
23:50
Speaker 1: Sometimes twenty four hours a day. Finding a way to
23:53
Speaker 1: step out of that world and recharge your batteries is
23:56
Speaker 1: going to be so important to protecting your mental health.
24:01
Speaker 1: The next thing, obviously is just track your time and expenses,
24:06
Speaker 1: reclaim the awareness. And I know you never want to
24:09
Speaker 1: get into that conversation with spouses or siblings, but I
24:13
Speaker 1: think it is important to just say, oh, my gosh,
24:16
Speaker 1: so I spent X amount of time doing this activity
24:21
Speaker 1: this week or today and the expenses that come with it.
24:25
Speaker 1: If anything, it is just validating that the work that
24:29
Speaker 1: people that are taking care of others are doing is
24:32
Speaker 1: incredibly valuable. And sometimes that's enough, is just to be
24:38
Speaker 1: validated in the work that you're doing when you're not
24:41
Speaker 1: somewhere getting accolades and recognized by coworkers and employees. In
24:46
Speaker 1: this situation like that, it feels really good to just
24:49
Speaker 1: be able to say a job well done. So track
24:52
Speaker 1: what you're doing and ask for the feedback or at
24:58
Speaker 1: least the colle colaborative conversation to feel seen and heard
25:05
Speaker 1: and valued. And then, obviously, if financially you're in a
25:09
Speaker 1: situation where things are a little bit tight because of
25:11
Speaker 1: this position that you're in, there are so many different
25:16
Speaker 1: grants and ways to take compensation. You know, whether it's
25:21
Speaker 1: state benefits, and depending on what state you're in, there
25:24
Speaker 1: are different resources for you that would help financially. There
25:28
Speaker 1: are stipends. Just make sure that you're exploring if there's
25:32
Speaker 1: any of those financial resources that are available to you,
25:36
Speaker 1: because if there's a helping hand out there, let's find
25:39
Speaker 1: it and take advantage of it. The other thing is
25:43
Speaker 1: to consider therapy or coaching. Addressing burnout and identity loss
25:52
Speaker 1: is a real thing, and this goes back obviously the village.
25:55
Speaker 1: I know for myself, sitting around with friends sometimes and
25:58
Speaker 1: having a glass of wine is is the best therapy
26:02
Speaker 1: you could ever ask for. But in other situations you
26:05
Speaker 1: may need a little bit more professional handholding to just
26:10
Speaker 1: talk through what it feels like to be maybe a
26:14
Speaker 1: top performer in a career. In stepping back, I know
26:18
Speaker 1: my cousin that I've mentioned in a lot of different episodes.
26:22
Speaker 1: She was a brand manager in New York City and
26:24
Speaker 1: made the decision to stay at home with her three kids.
26:28
Speaker 1: And that was a big adjustment to go from being
26:30
Speaker 1: an executive that was running around a bustling city to
26:34
Speaker 1: now being at home raising kids. She wouldn't change anything
26:37
Speaker 1: in the world, but certainly there comes a little bit
26:40
Speaker 1: of an identity crisis of your world shifts and the
26:44
Speaker 1: things you're talking about shift, and some people will go
26:47
Speaker 1: through that with less hiccups than others. So if if
26:51
Speaker 1: you feel like you need some tools or resources to
26:55
Speaker 1: deal with this adjustment, find them. There are resources out
26:59
Speaker 1: there for everybody. And lastly, I would say consider financial journaling.
27:05
Speaker 1: Think through the ways that For example, if you are
27:09
Speaker 1: staying home with young children, we're looking at the costs
27:12
Speaker 1: that is coming with that to your family, but it
27:15
Speaker 1: also helps to think about the money that you're saving
27:17
Speaker 1: by doing that. And certainly you know private school or
27:21
Speaker 1: daycares are very expensive, uniforms and school lunches, all of
27:28
Speaker 1: those things. So I would always, like anything in life,
27:30
Speaker 1: by looking at one side, you want to look at
27:33
Speaker 1: the other side of the coin and make sure that
27:36
Speaker 1: both sides are getting attention so that you really can
27:40
Speaker 1: celebrate the wins while also acknowledging the sacrifices that come
27:45
Speaker 1: with making the decision to step out of the workforce.
27:49
Speaker 1: And I will say, really, what you're carrying that no
27:53
Speaker 1: one sees, and how you financially plan start honoring that
27:59
Speaker 1: in visible work, because I know most days it feels
28:04
Speaker 1: invisible and oftentimes will be find ways to honor that
28:08
Speaker 1: for yourselves and celebrate the wins by just bringing awareness
28:13
Speaker 1: to all of the good that you're doing, even on
28:16
Speaker 1: the days that it feels hard to celebrate. So I
28:19
Speaker 1: know this topic is not necessarily a fun one. It's heavy,
28:24
Speaker 1: but so many of these decisions and situations are the
28:31
Speaker 1: only way to unload some of that burden is to
28:34
Speaker 1: have the conversations. Wealth isn't just about money. It's about freedom, options,
28:41
Speaker 1: peace of mind, and women deserve all three of those things,
28:45
Speaker 1: even in the seasons when we're pouring ourselves out for others,
28:50
Speaker 1: and it happens to almost all of us at some point.
28:54
Speaker 1: So I guess my biggest asks for all of you
28:58
Speaker 1: is to revisit your budget, caregiving being a part of that.
29:05
Speaker 1: Think through what that looks like if you're staying at
29:08
Speaker 1: home or if you're taking care of someone else, Make
29:11
Speaker 1: the adjustments that are necessary so that you are feeling
29:14
Speaker 1: as in control of your financials as humanly possible, while
29:20
Speaker 1: in a situation that may not have been one of
29:22
Speaker 1: your making. Talk with your partner or a parent or
29:28
Speaker 1: a sibling, make sure that you understand what support needs
29:33
Speaker 1: to look like, what it will look like in the future,
29:37
Speaker 1: and revisit those insurances. Obviously, we want to make sure
29:40
Speaker 1: that you are as financially bulletproof as humanly possible, and
29:45
Speaker 1: the only way to do that is to hedge your bets,
29:49
Speaker 1: spend a little bit of money to protect yourself in
29:51
Speaker 1: worst case situations, and make sure that everybody is on
29:56
Speaker 1: board with doing so. And then share this episode with
30:01
Speaker 1: a caregiver that's in your life. There are so many
30:04
Speaker 1: women at home that may just really appreciate the validation
30:09
Speaker 1: of a friend or wife or sibling listening to this
30:14
Speaker 1: and saying, I listened to this podcast and realize that
30:18
Speaker 1: you're giving up a lot and I appreciate it. Sometimes
30:21
Speaker 1: that will be the best gift that you can give
30:24
Speaker 1: somebody that's at home, pouring into somebody else. And lastly, guys,
30:30
Speaker 1: just keep having the conversations. So many things that we
30:33
Speaker 1: talk about surrounding wealth and success and money don't have
30:39
Speaker 1: necessarily a direct tide to investments or budgeting or planning.
30:46
Speaker 1: These things all impact the money coming into your family,
30:50
Speaker 1: and like I said a few minutes ago, wealth is
30:53
Speaker 1: truly about understanding all components of how money comes in,
30:58
Speaker 1: what it does, and how it goes out. Right, So
31:01
Speaker 1: have the conversations with each other about money. It doesn't
31:06
Speaker 1: matter in what capacity, just start talking about it. You
31:10
Speaker 1: never know who's listening. You never know when you're going
31:13
Speaker 1: to be impacting somebody else by sharing information, and you
31:17
Speaker 1: never know when you're going to be faced with something uncertain. So,
31:21
Speaker 1: as always, thank you so much for spending a little
31:24
Speaker 1: bit of time with me and listening to the Talk
31:26
Speaker 1: Wealthy to Me podcast. Please like, share, subscribe, review, and
31:33
Speaker 1: if there's anybody that you'd like to hear, let me know.
31:36
Speaker 1: And if you need any resources on a checklist of
31:40
Speaker 1: how do I even start when it comes to planning
31:43
Speaker 1: to be a caregiver? Drop a note in the show
31:46
Speaker 1: notes and my team will make sure to get something
31:49
Speaker 1: over to you to give you a little bit of
31:51
Speaker 1: a foundation to start with. Until next time, let's change
31:55
Speaker 1: the way women think and feel about money together,