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Tragedy struck-she lived to tell about it! · Unashamed Table Talk

• 0:00
  SPEAKER_02: You know that just a few weeks ago we were at the Christian Communicators Conference.
• 0:04
  SPEAKER_02: We were so excited to get to coach and teach women at this conference.
• 0:09
  SPEAKER_02: And really, it's all about building Christian speakers and authors and equipping them.
• 0:14
  SPEAKER_02: And you met Kim a few weeks ago in our season finale of season one.
• 0:18
  SPEAKER_02: And through this week in Dallas, we got to meet this really fun lady.
• 0:24
  SPEAKER_02: It was like as soon as I heard her open her mouth, I said, Oh, we're this is my kind of people.
• 0:31
  SPEAKER_02: Like he's just funny.
• 0:32
  SPEAKER_02: She's quick.
• 0:34
  SPEAKER_02: And like it was just funny.
• 0:36
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah, we had a good time with her, like just listening to her from afar and watching her just laugh and having a little bit of conversation.
• 0:43
  SPEAKER_03: And we didn't really get to spend a whole lot of time with her, but it didn't take long to be like, oh yeah.
• 0:48
  SPEAKER_03: Matter of fact, I think I came to you and said, we need that girl there.
• 0:52
  SPEAKER_03: She needs to come on our podcast.
• 0:54
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah.
• 0:54
  SPEAKER_03: So welcome, Mary Beth.
• 0:57
  SPEAKER_03: We are so glad to have you with us today.
• 1:00
  SPEAKER_03: Thank you.
• 1:01
  SPEAKER_01: That's the best introduction I think I've ever heard.
• 1:06
  SPEAKER_02: Let's just dive in and tell us first off a little bit about who you are.
• 1:10
  SPEAKER_02: What do you do?
• 1:11
  SPEAKER_02: Where do you live?
• 1:12
  SPEAKER_01: Sounds like I'm in college.
• 1:13
  SPEAKER_01: Like, what's your name?
• 1:14
  SPEAKER_01: Where are you from?
• 1:14
  SPEAKER_01: What's your major?
• 1:16
  SPEAKER_02: It's a get to know you game.
• 1:19
  SPEAKER_01: Um so I originally grew up in Fort Worth, but I have been in Waco for the past several decades.
• 1:26
  SPEAKER_01: I have to do math.
• 1:27
  SPEAKER_01: I don't want to do math.
• 1:28
  SPEAKER_01: But I came down, I came down to Waco to go to Baylor, and I just stayed here in Waco.
• 1:34
  SPEAKER_01: And I've been in education.
• 1:35
  SPEAKER_01: I'm on year 20.
• 1:37
  SPEAKER_01: And it was funny because I was talking to my best friend the other day, like literally the other day, and she was like, We're the veteran teachers.
• 1:44
  SPEAKER_01: I was like, how did that happen?
• 1:46
  SPEAKER_01: Like, how did we be the ones that everybody's like, oh, you've been here for forever.
• 1:51
  SPEAKER_01: You know all the things.
• 1:52
  SPEAKER_01: And like, I don't.
• 1:53
  SPEAKER_01: They don't know anything.
• 1:55
  SPEAKER_01: But I teach high school English.
• 1:57
  SPEAKER_01: I teach in a very small school.
• 1:58
  SPEAKER_01: I actually don't teach in Waco, but I commute to a little teeny tiny school outside of Waco.
• 2:04
  SPEAKER_01: And um, I love what I love what I do.
• 2:06
  SPEAKER_01: It's really funny.
• 2:07
  SPEAKER_01: I don't always love the kids, but I love what I get to do with them.
• 2:11
  SPEAKER_01: And so, I mean, they're teenagers, they have their moments.
• 2:13
  SPEAKER_01: And I actually, so it's summer right now, and I get I walk in the mornings.
• 2:18
  SPEAKER_01: And so when I get to, I walk at our zoo.
• 2:20
  SPEAKER_01: And so I went and I walked this morning.
• 2:22
  SPEAKER_01: I got to see the baby orangutan.
• 2:24
  SPEAKER_01: She's so cute.
• 2:25
  SPEAKER_01: And I got to see the camels.
• 2:27
  SPEAKER_01: She's so teeny tiny.
• 2:29
  SPEAKER_01: She's a few months old, but they don't grow very fast.
• 2:31
  SPEAKER_01: So she's just precious.
• 2:34
  SPEAKER_01: And um, I like to go to movies by myself and with friends, and I just I like to just be and just kind of do things.
• 2:42
  SPEAKER_01: I can't do all the things, but I can do some things.
• 2:44
  SPEAKER_01: I volunteered our local civic theater and I uh love my community there, and so yeah, so you're a theater nerd.
• 2:51
  SPEAKER_02: I am always love theater.
• 2:54
  SPEAKER_02: Oh my gosh, my whole family are super theater nerds, and it's so fun.
• 2:59
  SPEAKER_03: So we brought Mary Beth on the show for many reasons.
• 3:02
  SPEAKER_03: One is, like we said, we just really loved her personality.
• 3:05
  SPEAKER_03: We could tell that she loved the Lord, she just has this joy about her, but she has also survived a major traumatic situation that took place when you were a child.
• 3:18
  SPEAKER_03: So tell us.
• 3:19
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah, how old were you when this happened?
• 3:20
  SPEAKER_03: I was 17, 17.
• 3:22
  SPEAKER_03: See, I thought you were younger than that for some reason.
• 3:25
  SPEAKER_03: I mean, you're only like what, 25 now, so I was 17, so it was my senior year in high school.
• 3:32
  SPEAKER_01: And what made matters more interesting or worse was it was homecoming week, and I was in marching band, and so we had all the things planned out, and then literally two days before the homecoming game, it was September 15th, 1999, and we were having our our saw you at the poll rally for the see you at the poll day that they have now, it's their annual day of prayer for schools, and we have a rally, a youth rally at the end of that day every year, and we were getting ready for that.
• 4:01
  SPEAKER_01: And about 20 minutes after it started, a man entered our building and started shooting people, and it was very random.
• 4:08
  SPEAKER_01: He had no connection to us or to the church or anything like that, and he didn't even wait until he got in the sanctuary.
• 4:14
  SPEAKER_01: He literally entered the building and started shooting people, and so it lasted it lasted about eight minutes, it felt a lot longer, and it's just it's amazing how something like that can it changes your life for forever.
• 4:31
  SPEAKER_01: But and I remember like in the moment in a few years after that, it felt like it wasn't something that I wanted to always talk about because I didn't want that to be my life, and so the people who needed to know knew, but it wasn't until recently that I really started sharing the story more because it's not about the shooting itself, it's more about what the Lord has done with that and since then.
• 4:58
  SPEAKER_01: And you know, hindsight's 2020, and we can always see afterwards the greatness and the things that I mean, God's grace and mercy that He just pours out onto us, even in our most trying of times.
• 5:12
  SPEAKER_01: And so that is the message that more recently I have been able to share with more people.
• 5:19
  SPEAKER_01: So it's been good.
• 5:21
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
• 5:22
  SPEAKER_02: Well, I want to know going back to that season, you were you were saved at a young age, so you were you were already a believer, you were clearly going to church.
• 5:30
  SPEAKER_02: But I know a lot of 17-year-olds that go to church that maybe don't have a real relationship with the Lord.
• 5:36
  SPEAKER_02: In that season, were you walking closely with the Lord?
• 5:40
  SPEAKER_02: Like, where was your faith before like right at the time of the shooting versus after the shooting?
• 5:48
  SPEAKER_01: I was very involved with my youth group at church.
• 5:50
  SPEAKER_01: Um, I grew up in that church, and I it was a very Bible-believing church, and I'm so grateful that all of the preaching, all the teaching that we had that I had received was biblically based.
• 6:03
  SPEAKER_01: And so my foundation of my faith was very, very strong.
• 6:08
  SPEAKER_01: When the shooting happened, I was able, it it just solidified my faith.
• 6:16
  SPEAKER_01: It made real what I already knew.
• 6:18
  SPEAKER_01: Does that make sense?
• 6:19
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah, and it then I remember I've told the story of how that was the first time that I heard the voice of God.
• 6:26
  SPEAKER_01: And I told people, like, you know, I've heard the voice of God, I'm like, oh, what does that sound like?
• 6:29
  SPEAKER_01: I'm like, well, it sounds like me, but it doesn't sound like me.
• 6:33
  SPEAKER_01: It's like he, you're telling yourself something that doesn't make any sense, but in the grand scheme of things, it does.
• 6:40
  SPEAKER_01: And I remember in during that time, I heard this voice and it said, You're gonna get shot, but you're gonna be okay.
• 6:47
  SPEAKER_01: And I kept saying it out loud because I believed it, and I knew like I knew where that voice came from, and I knew what it was.
• 6:54
  SPEAKER_01: And when it happened, I kind of questioned, I was like, was that fucking shot felt like it it felt it didn't feel real?
• 7:03
  SPEAKER_01: But then I remembered I wasn't worried because he told me I was gonna be fine.
• 7:09
  SPEAKER_01: And even after that, we have people would ask us, you know, where was God and all this?
• 7:13
  SPEAKER_01: Like, he was exactly where he was supposed to be.
• 7:16
  SPEAKER_01: He, I don't think he orchestrated it, but he knew it was gonna happen.
• 7:19
  SPEAKER_01: He allowed it to happen, and only not gonna say only good things, but for those of us who are still believers, and even for those who aren't, like if that was something that shook their faith, he is still the same God, and he is still turning things for his glory and to do things that will further the kingdom, and he can take our pain and our suffering and still do that for others and for ourselves, for us.
• 7:49
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah, that's good.
• 7:50
  SPEAKER_02: Romans 8 28 says basically, and we know that in all things God worked for the good of those who love God and are called according to his purpose for them.
• 8:02
  SPEAKER_02: And I sometimes I think that that scripture can be taken out of context, and because it's not saying, you know, all things are good, it says that he works all things out for good for those that love the Lord.
• 8:15
  SPEAKER_02: And and I think that is so powerful whenever you're dealing with any kind of tragedy.
• 8:20
  SPEAKER_02: And I've never obviously been shot.
• 8:23
  SPEAKER_02: My husband's been shot by a self, he would he shot his self in the hand, yeah, working on a gun.
• 8:28
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah.
• 8:29
  SPEAKER_02: My husband's a gunsmith, but the bottom line is we all have some kind of tragedy in our lives, and not all of our tragedies look the same, or you know, we're not gonna compare stories or try to compete on who has the most severe tragedy, but hardships hit, and when we are going through those things as a believer, we do have the hope that somehow, some way, God can and will work this out for our good, but for his glory.
• 9:02
  SPEAKER_02: And we've lived it and experience it every day.
• 9:06
  SPEAKER_03: Hope and pray that I would hear God, I would pay attention to him, and that I would trust him.
• 9:14
  SPEAKER_03: But sometimes we think we will, but when we're faced with a tragedy, we don't always turn straight to the Lord like we think we would.
• 9:23
  SPEAKER_03: But but you said you heard him and you trusted him, and I just and I just love that, even especially as a 17-year-old being able to do that.
• 9:34
  SPEAKER_01: Well, I feel like I had no option but to trust it because I'd never been in that situation, and I didn't I didn't know what to think.
• 9:42
  SPEAKER_01: I didn't know what, and I I'm always not always, I sometimes wonder if because of where I ended up in the sanctuary, what was gonna happen, even like, and it wasn't just like I was gonna be okay in the moment.
• 9:56
  SPEAKER_01: It was like everything is gonna work out the way it's supposed to.
• 9:59
  SPEAKER_01: And I'm curious if he told me that because he knew what was coming, and I needed that reassurance that whatever is gonna happen, it's gonna be okay.
• 10:11
  SPEAKER_01: And it was interesting.
• 10:13
  SPEAKER_01: One of the verses that we really looked at after the shooting was Genesis 50, 20.
• 10:20
  SPEAKER_01: And that was one of the biggest verses, and it was like, You intended to harm me, but God intended it for good to accomplish what is now being done, the saving of many lives.
• 10:28
  SPEAKER_01: And that's exactly what happened.
• 10:30
  SPEAKER_01: Like, God just turned this around.
• 10:31
  SPEAKER_01: My pastor at the time, he was given a platform, and I was given a platform on the news internationally to share the gospel.
• 10:41
  SPEAKER_01: And, you know, we could, they wanted to talk about the shooting.
• 10:44
  SPEAKER_01: I was like, no, let's talk about what God did because of the shooting.
• 10:48
  SPEAKER_01: And so that was probably the the hardest thing to do.
• 10:50
  SPEAKER_01: And even as a 17-year-old, I still didn't really know how to talk about it.
• 10:54
  SPEAKER_01: I was just like, I'm just gonna share my experience and I'm gonna share, you know, what God has done and what he will do, hopefully.
• 11:01
  SPEAKER_01: And you know, it had people ask me, like, what does that sound like?
• 11:03
  SPEAKER_01: Like, how does that feel?
• 11:05
  SPEAKER_01: I'm like, I can't explain it.
• 11:06
  SPEAKER_01: When you hear that voice, you know it's that voice.
• 11:10
  SPEAKER_01: There's there's no doubt.
• 11:13
  SPEAKER_02: When you were shot, where were you shot?
• 11:16
  SPEAKER_02: How many times were you shot?
• 11:18
  SPEAKER_02: And kind of just paint that scene for us.
• 11:23
  SPEAKER_01: So where I ended up was in the back of the sanctuary, and um, I was only hit once.
• 11:29
  SPEAKER_01: And what was interesting was I thought he shot me from behind in the shoulder because this is gross, but I I was a lot more flexible and bendy in my younger years, and I was kind of curled over, and the way I was bleeding was out like towards the front and my shoulder, and so I was like, Well, that's where I was hit.
• 11:49
  SPEAKER_01: It didn't really hurt, and I hate to be that spoiler, but it's funny because now I've watched movies and like, oh, you could have run about 20 more feet.
• 11:56
  SPEAKER_01: I don't know why you just fell over, you know, he didn't shoot you in the knee, so terrible.
• 12:03
  SPEAKER_01: But I know that was it.
• 12:05
  SPEAKER_01: And I had to question, I was like, Oh, was that it?
• 12:07
  SPEAKER_01: Oh, yeah, it was.
• 12:08
  SPEAKER_01: But what it turns out, he actually hit me from the front and it hit, he shot me in the back.
• 12:15
  SPEAKER_01: And the way again I was hunched over, it traveled down my back about six inches, and so it tore nerve.
• 12:22
  SPEAKER_01: I have I still have some residual nerve damage, but I have two scars.
• 12:26
  SPEAKER_01: I don't have an exit wound, but I have a little scar where they had to, they had to pop it out like a like a pimple.
• 12:32
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
• 12:33
  SPEAKER_01: So there was a lady on my row that was that was killed.
• 12:37
  SPEAKER_01: He killed seven and he injured seven, and then he ultimately ended his own life when all was said and done.
• 12:44
  SPEAKER_01: But it it was really interesting because well, I because I didn't know where I was hit, I thought, because I knew it was like it's somewhere in my back.
• 12:52
  SPEAKER_01: I was more worried with like, I need to get out of the sanctuary, I need to call 911 because I knew I was gonna be okay.
• 12:59
  SPEAKER_01: So I wasn't worried, I guess.
• 13:01
  SPEAKER_01: But the biggest thing was I had to wait, and so I knew that as long as I could wiggle my toes, I'll be able to walk out, and so that's what I did.
• 13:08
  SPEAKER_01: I would breathe and I would just wiggle my toes, and like I can still feel my toes, so I'm not paralyzed.
• 13:13
  SPEAKER_01: He had moved away, he was probably about 15 to 20 feet behind me, and he sat down on a pew.
• 13:19
  SPEAKER_01: I didn't see him actually kill himself, but I did see his body, and there were several.
• 13:24
  SPEAKER_01: There was like a dead body on the end of my row, there was one behind the like there was sanctuary doors, and there was one in the hallway there, and there was one on the way when I was running out, and so it was it's very surreal.
• 13:36
  SPEAKER_01: It's like watching a movie.
• 13:38
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah, I am so grateful though that my my survival story is a little different because I knew it was real from the moment it started.
• 13:46
  SPEAKER_01: I saw him enter the building.
• 13:48
  SPEAKER_01: A lot of my friends that were there and a lot of people who were there didn't think it was real, they thought it was a skit.
• 13:54
  SPEAKER_01: So they all sat down and they were watching this skit because it was five, let's see, May, June, July, oh, this remember, five months after Columbine.
• 14:04
  SPEAKER_01: And so the biggest thing was like, okay, well, if someone came in and like started shooting, would you renounce your faith?
• 14:11
  SPEAKER_01: And so they thought it was a skit, which was probably great and saved more lives because they all sat down.
• 14:17
  SPEAKER_01: They weren't trying to run out the door where they could have been an easier target.
• 14:21
  SPEAKER_01: And so I it's very interesting to just think about it that way, and how I'm so grateful that I knew it was real and I was able to process it differently.
• 14:33
  SPEAKER_03: What would you say would be one of the strongest lessons the Lord has taught you since the shooting?
• 14:40
  SPEAKER_01: And I know it's I would say it sounds cliche, but like trust the process.
• 14:44
  SPEAKER_01: Like just trust that I would say I wouldn't have to say trust your gut, but if there's something in you that's telling you you shouldn't be doing something, trust that.
• 14:52
  SPEAKER_01: Like trust who he is, trust what he will do, trust in his plan, whether we know what it is or not.
• 15:01
  SPEAKER_01: But just trust that everything will work out for his good and his glory.
• 15:08
  SPEAKER_01: And we're just a tiny little piece of that.
• 15:11
  SPEAKER_01: And so anytime that we can share a story, or if in our daily lives, like in my classroom, I'm not like I can guarantee Jesus doesn't always pour out of me for my teenagers, but I'm still there in the hopes that anything that I do or say I can influence them in a positive way, but just that everything everything happens for a reason.
• 15:32
  SPEAKER_01: And his timing is perfect, even if we don't like it.
• 15:37
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
• 15:38
  SPEAKER_02: You had mentioned earlier when God spoke to you, he basically said, You're gonna be shot, but you're gonna be okay.
• 15:44
  SPEAKER_02: And I just want to just really quick go back to that because you will be okay.
• 15:49
  SPEAKER_02: You are okay, you lived, and God's now using your story to to draw people to you, and you're way more than this shooting story.
• 15:59
  SPEAKER_02: And I know the feelings of I don't want this to be my identity.
• 16:04
  SPEAKER_02: I I totally get that.
• 16:05
  SPEAKER_02: But the truth is, is the you will be okay doesn't always look like what we think it should look like.
• 16:11
  SPEAKER_02: In this in this circumstance, the you will be okay is you were okay.
• 16:15
  SPEAKER_02: You're still alive, you're well, you healed, you're not even crippled, you have no major disabilities because of this, maybe no disabilities whatsoever because of this.
• 16:24
  SPEAKER_02: But you will be okay could mean you're gonna be with me today in heaven.
• 16:28
  SPEAKER_01: And I like I remember I didn't know what okay really meant.
• 16:32
  SPEAKER_01: I interpreted it as you're gonna be, you're gonna survive and you're gonna live.
• 16:36
  SPEAKER_01: But I do like even thinking about it, and like I didn't know what okay meant.
• 16:40
  SPEAKER_01: I didn't know what he had intended for that.
• 16:42
  SPEAKER_01: But I also like the years following, because I went off, I graduated from high school, I went off to college.
• 16:49
  SPEAKER_01: Two years later, I was on medication because I could not function.
• 16:53
  SPEAKER_01: There were a lot of things that I was still having to deal with because I was dealing with these things away from family, and but I also knew that when I went on medication, it wasn't forever.
• 17:06
  SPEAKER_01: And so that was it.
• 17:07
  SPEAKER_01: But my journey getting to where I am now was not always easy.
• 17:13
  SPEAKER_01: It wasn't like, oh, the shooting is over.
• 17:15
  SPEAKER_01: I talked about it, I'm completely healed.
• 17:17
  SPEAKER_01: Like it has it has been a journey.
• 17:20
  SPEAKER_03: I wanted to address our listeners right now in your own life, you're going through a situation.
• 17:25
  SPEAKER_03: And as you're listening to Mary Beth, at the same time, you're thinking to yourself, Well, I didn't get shot, I haven't gone through that.
• 17:33
  SPEAKER_03: But I want to remind you that whatever your situation is, it's real and it's what is rocking your world right now, wherever you're at.
• 17:45
  SPEAKER_03: And I just wonder if you have thought about how God is working in it and through it.
• 17:53
  SPEAKER_03: As we listen to Mary Beth talk about going through this tragedy, and she knew she was going to be okay because she heard God's voice.
• 17:59
  SPEAKER_03: Maybe you were going through a tragedy right now, and you're not real sure you're going to be okay.
• 18:05
  SPEAKER_03: I just want to remind you that if you know the Lord or you don't know the Lord, the Lord sees you, He hears you, you will be okay.
• 18:13
  SPEAKER_03: As BJ already mentioned, okay for you and okay for Mary Beth may look like two different things, but you will be okay.
• 18:20
  SPEAKER_03: God will hold your hand through it, he will carry you through it.
• 18:23
  SPEAKER_03: The key is reaching out to the Lord no matter what your tragedy is, and not comparing one tragedy to another tragedy, because whatever it is in your world right now, like I said, that's your tragedy.
• 18:36
  SPEAKER_03: That is the thing that is rocking your world.
• 18:39
  SPEAKER_03: Give it to the Lord and trust him in it.
• 18:41
  SPEAKER_02: Well, pain is universal, right?
• 18:43
  SPEAKER_02: I heard, I don't remember who it was.
• 18:45
  SPEAKER_02: That's not my original thought, but it stuck with me because no matter what you're going through, pain is pain.
• 18:52
  SPEAKER_02: And the way that we feel and process through that are very similar for most of the time.
• 18:58
  SPEAKER_02: And obviously there's differences, but but pain is universal.
• 19:03
  SPEAKER_02: And you your pain is valid, whatever you're facing, whether it's diagnosis or financial troubles, or a child that is running from the Lord or on drugs, and or maybe you're on drugs and you're battling a secret addiction of some kind, pornography, or I mean, the the list is is forever long, right?
• 19:28
  SPEAKER_02: We all have something that we're battling.
• 19:31
  SPEAKER_02: And if you're not battling something currently, praise the Lord.
• 19:35
  SPEAKER_02: Right.
• 19:35
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
• 19:36
  SPEAKER_02: It's that old saying, you're either coming out of a trial, in a trial, or headed into a trial.
• 19:43
  SPEAKER_02: And that is very valid because that's life.
• 19:48
  SPEAKER_02: Life is always lifing and happening, and it's hard.
• 19:53
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah, and I think God always brings us people who can help us through those situations as well to encourage us, to lift us up, to pray for us.
• 20:01
  SPEAKER_03: As we talked to Kim Dotson a few weeks ago, she said she was in a place that she couldn't pray, but she knew that she had tons of people praying for her.
• 20:12
  SPEAKER_03: So it's kind of amazing how we don't always see God in it, and we don't always hear God like Mary Beth did.
• 20:20
  SPEAKER_03: But as believers, we know that he's there.
• 20:23
  SPEAKER_03: And maybe we don't recognize it in the moment, but once time has passed, we can usually always look back and see how God has worked in it.
• 20:32
  SPEAKER_02: And what a gift.
• 20:33
  SPEAKER_02: If you do not know the Lord as your personal savior right now, I really want to invite you to get on your knees and truly seek out the truth.
• 20:43
  SPEAKER_02: Because what we know scripture tells us is that he wants you to have a personal relationship with him.
• 20:49
  SPEAKER_02: And I want you to have the same hope and truth that we have, because I don't know how you go through life without knowing him and without the hope and the comfort that somehow my okay is gonna be okay.
• 21:06
  SPEAKER_02: Right.
• 21:07
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah, he is the answer.
• 21:10
  SPEAKER_02: Please, if you do not know for sure that Jesus is your Lord and Savior, message us, find a friend that you know believes, uh, or simply pray a prayer asking him to save you and commit your life to him.
• 21:29
  SPEAKER_02: It really will change everything.
• 21:31
  SPEAKER_02: It doesn't fix everything, it doesn't solve all the problems, but it will instill and restore hope, which is the only way I know you get through any real tragedy.
• 21:43
  SPEAKER_03: For sure.
• 21:44
  SPEAKER_03: And Mary Beth, we all live in Texas, and in Texas, we are we're proud.
• 21:50
  SPEAKER_03: Texas folks are proud of our state, right?
• 21:53
  SPEAKER_03: Yes, a lot of people in Texas carry.
• 21:58
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah.
• 22:00
  SPEAKER_03: Carriers.
• 22:00
  SPEAKER_03: A lot of people in Texas carry guns to churches.
• 22:04
  SPEAKER_03: They've passed a few things, I think, about teachers being able to carry a gun to school, or I don't remember, did that pass, or they're working on that or something.
• 22:14
  SPEAKER_03: How do you feel about someone who carries or church security and that type of thing?
• 22:18
  SPEAKER_01: So this is really this has also come a long way.
• 22:21
  SPEAKER_01: We do active shooter training at school.
• 22:24
  SPEAKER_01: Right now, I don't quote quote me if I mean don't quote me on this, but I don't believe they did pass something.
• 22:31
  SPEAKER_01: But there is a guardian program where there we like campuses can have a firearm, and there are people who are specifically identified and trained as guardians.
• 22:41
  SPEAKER_01: We're not supposed to know who they are, but they know where we can they can get a firearm on campus or anywhere.
• 22:50
  SPEAKER_01: It doesn't bother me because the people who are usually concealed carry are not the ones who are gonna hurt me.
• 22:56
  SPEAKER_01: They're the ones who are hopefully gonna take out the bad guy.
• 22:58
  SPEAKER_01: We have security person, we have a courtesy police officer at church, and we have security teams.
• 23:04
  SPEAKER_01: And I know for some people that can be very discomforting.
• 23:08
  SPEAKER_01: And it's almost like we're at church, we should be safe.
• 23:10
  SPEAKER_01: And I'm like, it church should be the safest place you're gonna go.
• 23:14
  SPEAKER_01: I'm like, I'm living proof of like I should have been safe at church, but unfortunately that night I wasn't.
• 23:21
  SPEAKER_01: I even think I wrote like the safest place became the most dangerous place I could ever be.
• 23:26
  SPEAKER_01: You know, I think it's all about intent, and I think it's you know, if you intend to inflict harm on someone, then you shouldn't be given a firearm.
• 23:35
  SPEAKER_01: I remember when they were saying about teachers like teachers should be allowed to have firearms.
• 23:39
  SPEAKER_01: I'm like, no, because who's to say that I don't get so mad at a student that I don't take someone out that I shouldn't?
• 23:45
  SPEAKER_01: But like that's fair.
• 23:47
  SPEAKER_01: I mean, we hear about baseball like coaches like having a baseball bat in their room, which some do, which actually is not a bad idea, not for students, but to uh for perpetrators.
• 23:58
  SPEAKER_01: Just to be clear, not for students, not for students, not for students gun control like laws and things aren't gonna change anything.
• 24:05
  SPEAKER_01: I mean, look at prohibition.
• 24:06
  SPEAKER_01: They're like, we're gonna outlaw alcohol, and then everybody became an alcoholic.
• 24:10
  SPEAKER_01: So, you know, I mean, you you can try to legalize something, but it doesn't make it morally right or morally just.
• 24:16
  SPEAKER_01: I I personally do not carry, I don't want to, but I have friends who do, and it's like they're gonna protect me.
• 24:25
  SPEAKER_01: They're not there to hurt me.
• 24:26
  SPEAKER_01: And I think if we think of it in that way, it makes it a lot better for the rest of us.
• 24:31
  SPEAKER_01: Now in Texas, I mean, we are in Texas, so and they're probably a better shot than anybody else would be.
• 24:36
  SPEAKER_01: So I'll trust them over anything.
• 24:39
  SPEAKER_01: So it does not bother me.
• 24:40
  SPEAKER_02: Tell us about your book.
• 24:41
  SPEAKER_02: Is it a it's not about the shooting, correct?
• 24:44
  SPEAKER_01: Starts with that, but it's a very, very small part.
• 24:47
  SPEAKER_02: You say, I will share about the shooting because that's the hook, but that doesn't define who you are, not then or now.
• 24:55
  SPEAKER_01: So have time to tell the story of how the book came to be.
• 24:59
  SPEAKER_01: Sure.
• 24:59
  SPEAKER_01: What's the name of the book?
• 25:01
  SPEAKER_01: Not bad, just different.
• 25:02
  SPEAKER_01: Living life as a mass shooting survivor.
• 25:05
  SPEAKER_01: A few years back, so in May of 2022, there was a mass shooting down in Uvalde, Texas, at Rob Elementary.
• 25:11
  SPEAKER_01: And I remember we were sitting, it they we we had a meeting on our campus, and I was sitting in our library, and I heard that voice again.
• 25:20
  SPEAKER_01: I've like that voice that I've heard it, and he said, It's time, and I said, Nope.
• 25:24
  SPEAKER_01: Like, I didn't want to write this, I don't want it to be a reaction to something.
• 25:28
  SPEAKER_01: And he's like, Okay, fine.
• 25:29
  SPEAKER_01: And so a few weeks later, he's like, It's time.
• 25:32
  SPEAKER_01: I said, nope, because I was working on another project and it was going terribly.
• 25:36
  SPEAKER_01: And then finally in September of 2022, he said, It's time.
• 25:40
  SPEAKER_01: I was like, Okay, fine.
• 25:42
  SPEAKER_01: So it just kind of came pouring out.
• 25:44
  SPEAKER_01: But what it is is it shares the story starting with Columbine actually, and then I briefly tell the story of the shooting, I give some details, but I talk about life after that because you know, they'll interview people a year after something happens, they're still in that grief process, and sometimes they still can't process, and a lot of times they're still depressed, or it's a very sad and heart-wrenching story.
• 26:10
  SPEAKER_01: And I don't know if that's where the media wants us to go with it, but I'm like, I don't want to know what life was like a year later.
• 26:16
  SPEAKER_01: I want to know what life could look like for me 20 years down the road.
• 26:19
  SPEAKER_01: Like, am I still gonna feel like this?
• 26:22
  SPEAKER_01: Or is there hope that I can move beyond this?
• 26:27
  SPEAKER_01: It's still a part of who I am.
• 26:28
  SPEAKER_01: It's not who I am, it's a part of me.
• 26:31
  SPEAKER_01: But what can I offer to other people who are going through trauma?
• 26:35
  SPEAKER_01: And that's the other thing is trying to relate to people and like not everybody's been shot in church.
• 26:40
  SPEAKER_01: Yay, lucky me.
• 26:42
  SPEAKER_01: But you know, trauma is trauma, and we've all gone through something that changes our life.
• 26:46
  SPEAKER_01: It changes, you know, how we fear things and how we feel about things, but God is still God, He's the same God yesterday, today, and tomorrow.
• 26:55
  SPEAKER_01: And, you know, he can still walk with us.
• 26:57
  SPEAKER_01: Like, I write a chapter about forgiveness, and I write a chapter about active shooter training, and I write a chapter about like how can you still believe?
• 27:06
  SPEAKER_01: Because they asked us that over and over and over again.
• 27:09
  SPEAKER_01: And I'm like, because I I think I even wrote a sentence is like, I don't have enough faith to not believe in something.
• 27:17
  SPEAKER_01: Like, I am not strong enough, like I have to believe in something.
• 27:21
  SPEAKER_01: And so I can't imagine.
• 27:24
  SPEAKER_01: I think I wrote this in my my application.
• 27:26
  SPEAKER_01: I was like, I can't imagine living a life of unbelief.
• 27:30
  SPEAKER_01: Because if I had, I have no idea where my life would be if I did not have that foundation of who the Lord was in my life, and if I didn't constantly try to grow deeper in my walk with him as I've gotten older, my understanding gets deeper, and then I realize I don't know anything and I still have to learn more.
• 27:50
  SPEAKER_01: And so, and I I love that there's so many different facets to him, and he reveals them to us in his time when we need it the most.
• 27:59
  SPEAKER_01: And so, but I it's a two-part book.
• 28:02
  SPEAKER_01: Back to my book.
• 28:04
  SPEAKER_01: The first part is about my life, it's relatively short because I'm not that old.
• 28:08
  SPEAKER_01: Remember 25.
• 28:09
  SPEAKER_01: And part two, I actually it's funny because I called it coffee conversations, and I don't drink coffee.
• 28:18
  SPEAKER_01: But I offered like just some response if anybody was going through something or if they were wanting to share their own story.
• 28:26
  SPEAKER_01: Like, I have some reflection questions and an opportunity for people to reflect if they want to.
• 28:31
  SPEAKER_01: They don't have to, but um, just kind of they can interact with it in some way, but they don't mean it's optional.
• 28:38
  SPEAKER_01: But yeah, I just I wanted to share a story of hope and healing.
• 28:43
  SPEAKER_01: And I also I think part of my apprehension for writing this was I knew it would be a very high interest story, and that scared me.
• 28:51
  SPEAKER_01: And I was like, I don't want to just talk about the shooting, and that's what people ask about.
• 28:56
  SPEAKER_01: And I do talk about it a little bit more now, but yeah, my it was funny.
• 29:00
  SPEAKER_01: I have I have coworkers who've read it, and she got to the chapter, she's like, I'm using it like a devotional.
• 29:04
  SPEAKER_01: I'm like, Oh, so great! And she's like, Well, I'm on the chapter of the shooting, and she got really serious.
• 29:09
  SPEAKER_01: I'm like, Good news, I survive.
• 29:12
  SPEAKER_01: And she's like, Well, I know.
• 29:14
  SPEAKER_01: I was like, I live, it's okay.
• 29:15
  SPEAKER_01: She's like, Well, I know that.
• 29:16
  SPEAKER_01: But she was reading that, and so it was it was great for a sparking conversation.
• 29:20
  SPEAKER_02: So okay, as we wrap up this episode, first, thank you very much for sharing your story of the shooting and life after the story after the shooting.
• 29:31
  SPEAKER_02: But for someone who's listening who has gone through some type of tragedy, maybe they're living in fear or bondage of some kind, what is something that you would like to tell them?
• 29:43
  SPEAKER_02: If there's that one lady listening right now that has either gone through something or is going through something, what is your what is your word to her?
• 29:53
  SPEAKER_01: It took me a while to get to this place, but we give power to that which we fear.
• 30:00
  SPEAKER_01: If we're afraid of something, we are giving it power over us.
• 30:06
  SPEAKER_01: And I actually I quote one of my favorite movies, Strictly Ballroom, and one of the characters, she says, a life live in fear lived in fear is a life half-lived.
• 30:19
  SPEAKER_01: I'm like, that's not biblical.
• 30:20
  SPEAKER_01: I'm like, but that's very true.
• 30:21
  SPEAKER_01: And you know, the Lord didn't give us the spirit of fear.
• 30:24
  SPEAKER_01: And and I know that's easier said than done.
• 30:28
  SPEAKER_01: And I when I was in my mid-20s, so last year, I kind of came up with this mantra of you know, anxiety stems from fear, and the spirit of fear is not at the Lord.
• 30:38
  SPEAKER_01: And I would I would say that to my friends who are worried about something, and they're like, Okay, well, yeah, but I'm like, there's no but it's literally like we should have nothing to fear, because you know, God will take care of everything in his time.
• 30:54
  SPEAKER_01: And we give, again, we give power to the things that we fear, like that spider that I probably should kill.
• 31:00
  SPEAKER_01: I'm afraid of it, but I'm not gonna give it power.
• 31:02
  SPEAKER_01: I know that's a very trivial example, but it's that same kind of thought process.
• 31:07
  SPEAKER_01: If I'm gonna be afraid of something, that means it is hindering me from living my full life, my fullest life that you know that God intended for us.
• 31:15
  SPEAKER_03: So yeah, very good.
• 31:17
  SPEAKER_03: Psalm 56, verses three and four, David says, But when I am afraid, I will put my trust in you.
• 31:25
  SPEAKER_03: I praise God for what he has promised.
• 31:28
  SPEAKER_03: I trust in God.
• 31:29
  SPEAKER_03: So why should I be afraid?
• 31:31
  SPEAKER_03: What can mirror mortals do to me?
• 31:34
  SPEAKER_03: I love that.
• 31:35
  SPEAKER_03: It even makes me think back to Shadrach, Meshach, and Abednego.
• 31:39
  SPEAKER_03: Like, throw us in the fire.
• 31:42
  SPEAKER_03: If you want to throw us in, throw us in the fire.
• 31:45
  SPEAKER_03: Like, we're going to be okay and we're going to live no matter what.
• 31:48
  SPEAKER_03: You think about Esther?
• 31:50
  SPEAKER_03: If I die, I die.
• 31:52
  SPEAKER_03: It's that same type of mindset of what can mere mortals do to us when you know the Lord, you know where you will spend your eternity.
• 32:02
  SPEAKER_03: And we also know that we live in a sinful world and death is going to come while we're here.
• 32:07
  SPEAKER_03: And again, that's why it's so important that we know who our savior is and where we're going when we leave this earth.
• 32:14
  SPEAKER_03: So thank you so much for coming on.
• 32:17
  SPEAKER_03: Mary Beth, we'd love for you to come to Hot Springs to Unashamed Conference September the 25th and 26th at the Hot Springs Convention Center.
• 32:27
  SPEAKER_03: You gonna be able to come?
• 32:29
  SPEAKER_03: I see you looking at your calendar.
• 32:31
  SPEAKER_03: I was like, I know.
• 32:33
  SPEAKER_03: This is a woman of action right here.
• 32:35
  SPEAKER_03: She literally, I know our listeners cannot see us, but she literally just reached over, grabbed her calendar.
• 32:42
  SPEAKER_03: It says Hot Springs, unashamed on the calendar already.
• 32:45
  SPEAKER_03: Look at that.
• 32:46
  SPEAKER_01: An invisible ink.
• 32:52
  SPEAKER_02: And that's why we get along with her so well.
• 32:55
  SPEAKER_02: We invite you, all of our listeners, to please come.
• 32:58
  SPEAKER_02: We still have seats available.
• 32:59
  SPEAKER_02: It's gonna be a really good time.
• 33:01
  SPEAKER_02: Shelly Tomlinson, who is one of my all-time favorite speakers, is gonna be speaking Friday night.
• 33:06
  SPEAKER_02: She is going to bring down the house.
• 33:09
  SPEAKER_02: It's gonna be awesome.
• 33:10
  SPEAKER_03: It's gonna be great.
• 33:11
  SPEAKER_03: And we don't normally do this on the podcast, and we didn't even discuss this, but I'm just gonna throw it out there.
• 33:16
  SPEAKER_03: I haven't told you I got a call on the way here that we have about 15 other women from another recovery program.
• 33:25
  SPEAKER_03: They have 15 ladies who would like to come.
• 33:28
  SPEAKER_03: So that puts us at 41 women from two different recovery houses who are planning to attend our conference.
• 33:37
  SPEAKER_03: We have put that out there for them to come for free.
• 33:40
  SPEAKER_03: But we are asking if you know a business or anyone who would like to help offset the cost of that by sponsoring one of these ladies to come, her ticket price, that would be awesome.
• 33:52
  SPEAKER_03: Now, maybe you can't come, but maybe you got an extra 20 bucks that you'd be like, hey, put this towards one of those ladies' tickets, and we would truly appreciate that.
• 34:02
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah, you can support our ministry at unashamedww.com.
• 34:06
  SPEAKER_02: Thank you, Mary Beth, for being our guest.
• 34:09
  SPEAKER_02: We hope to see you in person soon.
• 34:12
  SPEAKER_02: You're about to be back in school.
• 34:13
  SPEAKER_02: Actually, by the time this airs, you may already be back to teaching.
• 34:16
  SPEAKER_02: So our prayers go with you.
• 34:18
  SPEAKER_02: You know, I have a big passion for teachers because it was a teacher that really began to actually see me in my most broken time of my life as a little girl.
• 34:29
  SPEAKER_02: And you have the power to make a massive difference in some little hood rat's life.
• 34:35
  SPEAKER_02: And I encourage you to do that.
• 34:38
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah.
• 34:38
  SPEAKER_03: Tell us one last time before we go the name of your of your book and where they can find it.
• 34:44
  SPEAKER_01: Okay, it's called Not Bad, Just Different, Living Life as a Mass Shooting Survivor.
• 34:49
  SPEAKER_01: It is available on Amazon.com.
• 34:52
  SPEAKER_01: It is also, there's an ebook version as well.
• 34:55
  SPEAKER_01: And I believe it's also on redemptionpress.com.
• 34:58
  SPEAKER_01: You can find it there.
• 34:59
  SPEAKER_01: Or if you're in the Waco area, I sell it out of the back of my car.
• 35:03
  SPEAKER_03: Perfect.
• 35:04
  SPEAKER_03: And the author's name is the one and only Mary Beth Tally.
• 35:09
  SPEAKER_03: Thank you again for coming on to the show, and we look forward to see what God's gonna do in your ministry here.
• 35:15
  SPEAKER_00: You've been listening to Table Talk with BJ Garrett and Denise Bowens.
• 35:19
  SPEAKER_00: To support this ministry through prayer or giving, visit our website at unashamedww.com.
• 35:27
  SPEAKER_00: May you be encouraged, rooted in truth, and unashamed.