Latest / Very Fine Friends / Das Boof
Transcript
- 0:00Hey, welcome to friends like us, the podcast where friends talk about stuff, the podcast
- 0:22where you wish you had friends like us. I'm Jenna and with me as always is the amazing,
- 0:31the perfect, the wonderful Francis. Hi, thanks. That's okay. You're welcome. You're great too.
- 0:39Oh, thank you. Yeah. I wasn't looking for that, but thank you. You found it. Oh, so how are you?
- 0:45I've been pretty good. I've been looking forward to this for weeks. Me too. Overall, how's your
- 0:49summer going it's hot um i hate to say that god i wish i hadn't said that delete that in post
- 0:54i was thinking about this because my dad no no my dad every day comes in he goes oh it's hot
- 1:00and it's like inducing such rage in me i don't know why so i'm like yeah it's hot like uh dennis
- 1:07next dennis friend of the pod uh he's okay anyway i know uh yeah i'm good i'm good i feel like uh
- 1:17You know, all the days run together.
- 1:19They're all kind of the same, but in a way that I don't mind, you know.
- 1:23Hmm.
- 1:23Interesting.
- 1:24Like, I'm enjoying my days.
- 1:25I'm glad.
- 1:26That makes me joyful due to how much I like you.
- 1:29Oh, thank you.
- 1:30Yeah.
- 1:31Do you want me to do something about Dennis for you due to how much I like you?
- 1:35Like, existentially?
- 1:36Yeah.
- 1:36We'll talk offline.
- 1:38Okay.
- 1:38All right.
- 1:39Cool.
- 1:41All right.
- 1:42Oh, you want to hear something that happened to me yesterday?
- 1:45I do.
- 1:46uh well it didn't really happen to me it just happened around me i'm out okay i was driving
- 1:51back on my usual way home from mesa my usual route and i don't know if this has always been
- 1:56there or if this is a new thing um you look exasperated by this already uh i don't know
- 2:03if this is a new thing or not but they now have a speed camera along my route and it flashed not
- 2:09for me i don't think because the guy that was to the left of me was going easily five miles an hour
- 2:15faster than me but it made me worried that i'm gonna still somehow be collateral damage in this
- 2:23speed camera thing like like because i flashed right when i was next to that guy who was going
- 2:29much faster than me and so like i saw the flash too but it couldn't have been for me i was only
- 2:34going like seven eight miles over the speed limit he was going like 13 14 over the speed limit maybe
- 2:40it's for both of you could is it possible no i think they have to pick one okay yeah but then
- 2:47like but i'm also like i was closer to the camera too so what if they're like ah this one's fine
- 2:51like easier to photograph yeah exactly good old five over yeah and you can get a clear picture of
- 2:57you since you're going slower i know oh i think it's just for show i don't think they actually
- 3:02send tickets okay i guess we'll find out in like six weeks you should go back and go faster
- 3:08okay or i'll just have you drive i'll wear one of those goggles that has a mustache on not goggles
- 3:17i was thinking glasses yeah is that what they called yeah is that what they called
- 3:21yeah what do you think uh that sounds good to me just as long as i don't have to pay for a ticket
- 3:27that's really the only thing that i'm worried about um this is not legal advice okay i'm gonna
- 3:35take it as such though.
- 3:36But I'm off the hook now.
- 3:38Okay.
- 3:39But I heard that they have to serve you.
- 3:41Like they have to physically.
- 3:43Yeah.
- 3:43So if you never pay the ticket,
- 3:44hypothetically,
- 3:45not advising this,
- 3:47they would have to dispatch someone to serve you.
- 3:49And if they never serve you.
- 3:51Okay.
- 3:52Because other people will just pay.
- 3:54Yeah.
- 3:55I probably would have done that.
- 3:57Yeah.
- 3:57Again,
- 3:58I say.
- 3:59This is 100% legal advice.
- 4:01Got it.
- 4:02From the lawyer,
- 4:03Francis J.D.
- 4:05okay well I just wanted to say that I'm putting it out there in the universe like I didn't tell
- 4:14Dan because I would be worried that he would be afraid of it because he's annoying like that but
- 4:18I have to tell you something now okay so when I was younger a friend of mine got one of those
- 4:22speaking tickets and the picture they sent in the mail was her popping a z
- 4:28popping a z you know was it oh i was like is this code for something that i don't know about i guess
- 4:38it was yeah it was yeah but it was like a close-up like in the mirror yeah like two finger
- 4:44pinching while she was speeding she is wow yeah she's talented yeah i think it was a red light
- 4:49cam actually oh okay that makes more sense uh also those are like always the worst possible
- 4:59pictures uh like you look doesn't matter who you are you look terrible it makes me think like
- 5:04is everyone just at their ugliest when they drive that sound like a carrie brashaw take
- 5:10made me wonder yeah yeah i'm probably i i would say i'm ugliest when i'm
- 5:17turned to the side like i've seen some pictures taken of me and i'll show you one later it's like
- 5:25grotesque okay just just not head on you mean right just like it's like one of those pictures
- 5:32where it's like is it a goblet or is it a witch as soon as i turn it's i'll show you is it a duck
- 5:39or a rabbit.
- 5:40Yeah.
- 5:41Exactly.
- 5:43Speaking of ducks and rabbits,
- 5:44yeah.
- 5:44Chinese Zodiac.
- 5:45What are you?
- 5:46I have no idea.
- 5:47How do I find that out?
- 5:49Google.
- 5:49Okay.
- 5:50Maybe our producer can work on that
- 5:51while we talk.
- 5:53I'll tell you right now,
- 5:54I am the year of the rabbit.
- 5:55Oh, good year.
- 5:56I agree.
- 5:57There's a band called
- 5:58Year of the Rabbit.
- 5:59Good band.
- 5:59No kidding.
- 6:00Yeah.
- 6:00I wonder if they're all born in,
- 6:01oh, I almost gave it away.
- 6:042001.
- 6:08Probably there.
- 6:09So young I forgot my birthday.
- 6:12Oh, you're still learning.
- 6:14I will say November, though, is my birth month.
- 6:17Okay.
- 6:18I think you've still revealed too much.
- 6:21November, Latin November.
- 6:24Latin November?
- 6:25It's different than the month.
- 6:27You were born in the year of the dog.
- 6:29Ooh.
- 6:31I'm a dog.
- 6:33That's cool.
- 6:33Dogs are loyal.
- 6:35Okay, cool.
- 6:36Some of them.
- 6:39Yeah, some.
- 6:40You sound so genius.
- 6:42I mean, I've heard.
- 6:43Dogs usually, my dogs always love me.
- 6:46But like, for example, my dad.
- 6:48Like, if I come home, my dog will leave him and come to me.
- 6:50So, to me, she's loyal.
- 6:52Yeah.
- 6:52But from his perspective, it's hot and our dog hates me.
- 7:00All right.
- 7:02Quick interruption.
- 7:03Every week on the podcast, we do something where our producer Joe gives Francis and I each our own secret word.
- 7:13Throughout the course of the podcast, we need to find a way to slip the secret word into our conversation without the other person noticing.
- 7:22If the other person can correctly guess the secret word, they get a point.
- 7:27And right before we die, we add up all the points.
- 7:30and then we get a prize whoever has the most points for guessing the most secret words
- 7:36here's joe with today's secret words jenna's secret word is massaged francis's secret word is
- 7:46shrinkage back to the podcast uh well how about uh we get to the invention of the week
- 7:53inventions
- 7:56Yes, sugar crush.
- 8:07Alright.
- 8:08You want me to take it away?
- 8:09Lay it on me.
- 8:10You're going to love this.
- 8:11For those who don know Francis is an inventor extraordinaire He constantly coming up with amazing ideas I do Yeah So here but another amazing idea
- 8:24I'm sorry.
- 8:25I was just thinking but another sounded like,
- 8:27like here's but another.
- 8:30I don't know.
- 8:31It sounds like an invention that you would come up with.
- 8:33Yeah.
- 8:33So just to give the audience a little background,
- 8:35I strongly identify with Rick Moranis' character in Honey,
- 8:39I Shrunk the Kids.
- 8:40I could have done that.
- 8:42So we won't go into all my other inventions,
- 8:44but here's one that I thought of very recently,
- 8:46and I'm so excited about it.
- 8:48On the top of your car, okay,
- 8:52it's like in a bag.
- 8:55Just bear with me.
- 8:56It's hard to explain because you're not in my head.
- 8:58When you park, you can unzip it,
- 9:00and it unfolds.
- 9:01It's an umbrella for the car,
- 9:02and legs come out,
- 9:04and there's these little magnetic feet
- 9:05that you put on the trunk and the hood
- 9:07that the legs go into.
- 9:08so your whole car is shaded.
- 9:13So it's like a tent.
- 9:14It's a tent for your car.
- 9:15A tent for your car.
- 9:16For when you're parking and it's hot.
- 9:19Okay.
- 9:19And so it lives on the top of the car.
- 9:22Yeah.
- 9:22Sleekly.
- 9:24Okay.
- 9:27It'll look like a little bullet or something on top of the car.
- 9:29Exactly, yeah.
- 9:31And then you press a button and it like...
- 9:34My dad wanted this to be electronic too.
- 9:36I was picturing a manual thing, but...
- 9:38Then you're in the sun, you're doing a lot of work.
- 9:41Well, because I was thinking those magnetic feet, you would put them on.
- 9:44But I guess people wouldn't want to do that every time.
- 9:46So, okay, I'm willing to.
- 9:48So 2.0.
- 9:50We're already at a beta.
- 9:51Yeah, we'll push the button.
- 9:53The umbrella will come out and the legs will come out and they will go onto the feet holes.
- 9:59Okay.
- 10:01All right.
- 10:03I can see this.
- 10:05I can see this being popular.
- 10:07What is the tent made out of?
- 10:10Like what actually shades like.
- 10:12It is made of umbrella.
- 10:16It's 100% umbrella.
- 10:18Yes.
- 10:19Dolphin safe umbrella.
- 10:22Okay.
- 10:23And then like, would you like sell designs too?
- 10:26Of course.
- 10:27Yeah.
- 10:27Yeah.
- 10:27Because buildings are tall and they have windows.
- 10:30And if you look down, you want to see.
- 10:32I didn't even think about it like that.
- 10:33Yeah.
- 10:33We'll do partnerships too.
- 10:35Yes, of course.
- 10:36Yeah.
- 10:36Rocco's Modern Life
- 10:39you know like the
- 10:40swirlies
- 10:42and the triangles
- 10:44that was the first partnership
- 10:46that you wanted
- 10:47get the guys from Rocco's Modern Life on the phone
- 10:51now
- 10:51yeah they gotta be looking for a comeback
- 10:53also
- 10:55straight up
- 10:56would you invest
- 10:58um
- 11:00ooh okay
- 11:01the rating system for the inventions
- 11:04yeah don't worry about profit
- 11:06Don't worry about shrinkage.
- 11:07None of that.
- 11:08Just straight up.
- 11:08What's the price point on this?
- 11:11The price point is $82.
- 11:17Oh, okay.
- 11:19But keep in mind, your car gets hot.
- 11:22Yeah, that's true.
- 11:23And we could run sales.
- 11:27Did you just invent sales, too?
- 11:29Cool.
- 11:30Got to take advantage.
- 11:31What would you pay?
- 11:34I don't know.
- 11:35I got to be honest.
- 11:36I'm skeptical it would actually like other than keeping.
- 11:39Okay.
- 11:40I'm sorry,
- 11:41Francis.
- 11:42Okay.
- 11:42But they have like window shields right now.
- 11:43Right.
- 11:44It's not enough,
- 11:45but yeah.
- 11:45Okay.
- 11:46Well,
- 11:46that's what I want to know.
- 11:47So like what,
- 11:47so you're just keeping the trunk and the hood.
- 11:50It goes over the entire vehicle.
- 11:51So that it actually helps be keeping the top covered actually helps keep the
- 11:57inside of the car.
- 12:00Yeah.
- 12:00Cool.
- 12:00What I would call baby safe.
- 12:02Oh,
- 12:03so you could leave your baby in the car.
- 12:04You didn't say that.
- 12:05Well, that's the big draw.
- 12:06There's no amount I wouldn't pay for this.
- 12:09Okay.
- 12:10I can keep my child locked in the car.
- 12:12Yeah.
- 12:13Not a dog, though, just in case.
- 12:15Right.
- 12:17Well, as someone born in the year of the dog, I understand.
- 12:22Okay.
- 12:22I would pay $82 for that.
- 12:26Okay.
- 12:26Thank you.
- 12:28I don't know if I'd be an angel investor, though.
- 12:31What is an angel investor?
- 12:32I think it's somebody that comes in with initial funding for something.
- 12:39Like the first round of funding.
- 12:42It's like, oh, we need anything to get off the ground.
- 12:46You wouldn't give anything?
- 12:48Okay.
- 12:50I would give something.
- 12:51But I mean, I don't know the level to which I'd invest.
- 12:55So you wouldn't go on Indiegogo or what's the other one?
- 13:00Kickstarter?
- 13:01Oh, yeah.
- 13:01And pre-order.
- 13:04You can get it for $50 because you're in so early.
- 13:07Knowing it eventually will be, you know.
- 13:09With Rocco's Modern Life or without?
- 13:11Of course.
- 13:12Those are the limited edition.
- 13:13Oh, could I do a Saved by the Bell themed one?
- 13:17No.
- 13:18No?
- 13:18Just Rocco's Modern Life?
- 13:19We can't do people.
- 13:21Well, no.
- 13:22I mean, but Saved by the Bell also has that kind of like swirly, like.
- 13:25Oh, okay.
- 13:26Yes, then.
- 13:27As long as it has swirls and weird graphics, then yes.
- 13:31Okay.
- 13:31uh all right yes i would i would pre-buy one on kickstarter thank you yeah thank you of course
- 13:38for anyone listening visit our website we'll tell you what it is later friendslikeuspod.com
- 13:44that was later yep and um there will be a link to
- 13:49i guess like car shade sun safe
- 13:54later there will be yes at a time tbd i would suggest checking in hourly from here to seven
- 14:06to eight years from now i think is the timeline we're looking at thank you i could do that all
- 14:12right so you know how i asked you earlier what an angel investor was yeah that reminded me i was
- 14:17thinking on the way over here there's a term i've heard i hope it's i hope this is a safe term to
- 14:21say and i don't know what it means so i was wondering if you did oh okay oh uh lay it on me
- 14:27boof oh like b-o-o-f i don't know i just remember hearing someone say take a boof or boof it
- 14:37with zero context i have no idea what this means i can't you know i've never heard that before
- 14:46Boof it?
- 14:47Boof it.
- 14:49Hey, hand me that boof.
- 14:52All right, well, we're going to find it later.
- 14:54You can't remember where you...
- 14:56I feel like it's drugs or something.
- 14:59Take a boof.
- 15:00It's like such an onomatopoeia type word that it doesn't...
- 15:05Oh, like boof.
- 15:06Yeah, it doesn't seem like it would be drugs.
- 15:09It seems like it would just be like, I don't know,
- 15:12like a euphemism for passing gas or something,
- 15:14or like, oh, boof, oops, I messed up,
- 15:18like that kind of a thing.
- 15:20I'm boofy.
- 15:21Yeah.
- 15:23Okay.
- 15:23It doesn't have the teeth that a drug term,
- 15:27like popping a Z.
- 15:28That sounds like a drug term.
- 15:30Popping a Z.
- 15:31Yeah.
- 15:31We need to invent a drug for that.
- 15:35All right.
- 15:37Well, let's close up the invention bag.
- 15:41That was our invention of the week.
- 15:43Okay.
- 15:43Zip.
- 15:44Good job.
- 15:46Go to friendslikeuspod.com and invest.
- 15:53We're calling it a donation.
- 15:57Because something has to help keep the inventor going.
- 16:01Yeah.
- 16:02I've got ideas for years.
- 16:04Yep.
- 16:05But still a finite number.
- 16:08So please invest, folks.
- 16:10Please donate.
- 16:11I feel like
- 16:14in the arms of an angel
- 16:15should be playing right now
- 16:16we can do up to like 10 seconds
- 16:18yeah yeah exactly
- 16:19we'll add that in in post
- 16:21oh my god you know what
- 16:22one of my family members died
- 16:24a long time ago
- 16:27and my cousin Pooh found her
- 16:30your cousin Pooh found her
- 16:31is this where you heard that term Francis I think that her name oh yeah aunt boof she moved it no what i was gonna say was she pulled up to pick her up for like a day out
- 16:51and that song was playing on the radio and she said she had a feeling that she was dead
- 16:58and she was. Wow.
- 17:01Like, do you think
- 17:02she just said that after
- 17:04the fact?
- 17:07Do you think she was lying?
- 17:08She didn't actually have a feeling
- 17:10that she kind of like tricked herself
- 17:12into thinking that she did feel that?
- 17:15Knowing people,
- 17:16I never crossed my mind until you suggested it, but
- 17:18it's something I would do.
- 17:20Like, if I remember in retrospect, like that song
- 17:22was playing, I could see myself being like,
- 17:24oh, you know what people would love to hear?
- 17:25yeah because it's like if like I was like
- 17:29rolling up to somebody's house to pick them up
- 17:31and like the song is like
- 17:33death death death
- 17:35everyone's dead
- 17:37we're all gonna die
- 17:39someday get a feeling it's her
- 17:41huh yeah death I'm thinking about
- 17:43death right now and then it just coincidentally
- 17:45I don't know
- 17:47I don't want to call Boof a liar
- 17:48do you think she died because that song was playing
- 17:51oh did Sarah
- 17:53McLaughlin kill your aunt
- 17:55can't say for sure yep get her on the phone that stop calling
- 18:03uh well francis jd francis jd will be suing you that's right i have a briefcase uh okay
- 18:15i think it's time to move on to the big question the question is very big
- 18:23I'm ready to hear your big question.
- 18:27Oh, okay.
- 18:28It's kind of a would you rather.
- 18:30Okay.
- 18:30All right.
- 18:33And I know we already mentioned a baby, so sorry if this is too much baby.
- 18:37But my would you rather is, would you rather once a day when you go, if you go somewhere,
- 18:46this happens in public, if you go in public, someone points at you loudly and screams,
- 18:50that's the lady that shook my baby.
- 18:59Or
- 18:59every day you stub your pinky toe so hard
- 19:04you pass out for five minutes.
- 19:06Every day.
- 19:07Oh.
- 19:09I mean, I feel like this one's a little bit easy, actually.
- 19:12You do?
- 19:12I do.
- 19:13Yeah, I'll take that's the lady that shook my baby.
- 19:16500, Alex.
- 19:18Yeah.
- 19:18I mean,
- 19:19I could take that.
- 19:21I mean, well, because like if someone just yells that because are they yelling it with like.
- 19:30Do they genuinely believe I shook their baby or are they just yelling it?
- 19:35Whether or not they believe it's irrelevant because they're doing it with such conviction that people around you automatically believe it.
- 19:46OK, let me make this harder.
- 19:48Okay.
- 19:49Because I feel like you said it was easy.
- 19:51Forget the toe.
- 19:52Okay.
- 19:53This is the lady that shook my baby versus, same scenario,
- 19:58that's the lady that left my dog in the car.
- 20:02With tears.
- 20:07Okay.
- 20:08Ooh.
- 20:09I think I'm still going to go with baby because I think baby is easier.
- 20:14it's like it's a less like it's the situation in which i might leave your dog in the car like
- 20:24there's a chance i would have had your dog in my care or whatever and accidentally left it in the
- 20:29car or purposefully left it in the car right i think people would be like what went like when
- 20:34did the she doesn't seem to know who you are when did she ever get a chance when did you let her
- 20:39hold your baby okay and then thank you yeah so i think that would be easier i i can see myself
- 20:47like i think if i had that both those situations i i probably it would be easier i could massage the
- 20:54the baby one a little bit okay easier well i wish you luck in that scenario okay well what would you
- 21:03do well let's go back to the original one one with the with the pinky toe because that was clearly
- 21:11you thought that was a difficult decision i don't want to black out i don't either i've never done
- 21:16it have you ever blacked out no i don't think i've ever come close i don't think i have either
- 21:22and i had like stomach surgery with like no anesthesia eyes open the whole time yeah it was
- 21:28a work yeah seriously it was very very painful and i thought now is the time to pass out my brain's
- 21:33like nope nope you're gonna feel this even i hate you so yeah i would choose the baby too
- 21:40because i would just be like she's nuts yeah yeah i have fired her
- 21:44you're supposed to be within 500 feet of me helen
- 21:47your baby wouldn't shut up what was i supposed to do
- 21:53i thought it was a die like a dice oh
- 21:58you shouldn't have dressed your baby up like a martini
- 22:04anyway you gave me fries and i wanted a shake too
- 22:12all right i have a big question for you now okay all right to be honest i didn't think of anything
- 22:22creative so i i'm taking this question from chuck klosterman who does a lot of these like hypothetical
- 22:30questions okay um all right so in this question all right you have a person that is genetically
- 22:37your clone they look exactly like you uh they have the same levels of intelligence and confidence
- 22:44they
- 22:46wait what
- 22:48this is horrifying already go on
- 22:50they desire and fear the same things that you do
- 22:53the only difference between you
- 22:55and this genetic clone
- 22:56is whatever lived life experiences
- 22:59they might have because they're off doing
- 23:01their thing oh just like twins
- 23:02oh uh I haven't
- 23:05seen the Danny DeVito and Schwarzenegger one
- 23:07yeah they were raised differently
- 23:08and I guess this is
- 23:10totally different because they
- 23:12look different
- 23:14but okay go on yeah okay um okay now in this scenario you learn that your genetic clone
- 23:24wants to destroy you whether it's because they think you're the evil version of them
- 23:31or because you they are the evil version of you doesn't matter they are trying to destroy you
- 23:39They want to destroy you.
- 23:40In this situation, do you go into hiding?
- 23:45Do you try and meet with them and like rationally discuss it and get them to back down?
- 23:53Or do you try and destroy them first?
- 23:58I have a question.
- 23:59Okay.
- 24:00Do other people know about this clone?
- 24:02Yes.
- 24:04Damn.
- 24:07I was just going to kill it.
- 24:09Oh, okay.
- 24:10But now you can't because it's a crime.
- 24:14So you think the clone was, like, living,
- 24:17and if the clone lived in isolation and no one knew it existed.
- 24:19No, this is, like, a whole other,
- 24:21just for whatever reason they have the exact same.
- 24:23Not a twin, a clone.
- 24:25Yes.
- 24:26And they want to destroy me.
- 24:28Yeah.
- 24:30Either, it doesn't matter why,
- 24:31either they're evil themselves,
- 24:33they're the evil version of you,
- 24:34or they think you're the evil version of them,
- 24:37and so they're trying to get rid of you first.
- 24:38Have you seen Enough, the thriller with Jennifer Lopez?
- 24:42Is that the one where she's like the domestic abuse one?
- 24:45Yes.
- 24:46I feel like I have and I forgot about it.
- 24:48Like most of it, except for that she was beaten.
- 24:51Okay.
- 24:51Well that I remembered the important stuff That was the first half Yeah Anyway I would pull in enough So I would make sure everyone around me knew that this clone was out to get me
- 25:04And I'm afraid.
- 25:06And then it would come to my modern beach house.
- 25:12And I would win the fight.
- 25:14Ultimately culminating in the clone's demise.
- 25:16But I would get off because...
- 25:18It would be self-defense.
- 25:19And everyone, you know, I posted it.
- 25:23Can you hear me typing?
- 25:25Yeah, send.
- 25:26Okay.
- 25:27So you trick it into thinking that you're scared and don't want it to come try and kill you.
- 25:34Right.
- 25:35It comes to try and kill you, and then you are...
- 25:38Sure as I am a coward.
- 25:40I mean, sure as he is a coward, he's going to try to kick me.
- 25:44That's from the movie.
- 25:47Okay.
- 25:47So you're just going to do the plot of Enough.
- 25:49yeah all right thank you for asking though yeah you're welcome i guess that was a more detailed
- 25:57so you'd kill it but you're telling me how you'd kill well i don't want people to think i'm
- 26:00that's just my go-to no no that's good i like that you have a full plan like to get away with it too
- 26:08well i don't like the implication of the phrase get away with it i mean you heard what you said
- 26:13he's trying to destroy me that's true i'm innocent i know at what point in time does
- 26:17self-defense start?
- 26:20Like, is it just
- 26:22this might be a little
- 26:24too deep for the pod. No, I'm a lawyer. Go on.
- 26:27Not a lawyer.
- 26:29He is a lawyer, 100%.
- 26:30Yeah, like it wouldn't
- 26:34how close does someone have to be
- 26:36to actually killing you before you can
- 26:38I think
- 26:39that
- 26:41you're allowed to do what they did.
- 26:47You know?
- 26:48Okay.
- 26:49So, like, if they have a brass knuckle and they punch you, you can't be like, pa-pow!
- 26:54Unless there's other circumstances.
- 26:58This is why we need lawyers.
- 27:00Thank God you're here.
- 27:05Everyone should just not be violent.
- 27:07Yeah, for the record, we do not endorse violence on the pod.
- 27:10Yeah.
- 27:12So, yeah, don't be violent.
- 27:13But if your genetic clone is coming for you.
- 27:17You're going to have to lay a breadcrumb trail to the beach house.
- 27:26Yeah.
- 27:27This is an important question.
- 27:28Where is your beach house?
- 27:30Where would I put my beach house?
- 27:31Yes.
- 27:33Well, I like how you already have the house and you get to put it wherever you want.
- 27:37Yeah, that's what cranes are for.
- 27:39A little magnet on top.
- 27:40Oh, that's what cranes are for.
- 27:42Oh, will you make an industrial shield for cranes to keep cranes nice and cool in the summertime?
- 27:49I don't know why I'm like the birds, but now I understand.
- 27:52Yeah, we could actually work that out to any mobile device.
- 27:57We could put it on your house.
- 27:59Okay.
- 27:59It'll probably lower your AC costs.
- 28:01I feel terrible for...
- 28:02We got to reopen the invention of the week.
- 28:05Does this invention have a name?
- 28:07you know that phrase
- 28:09like it's
- 28:12101 in the shade
- 28:14I thought we could do something with that
- 28:17101
- 28:18in the shade
- 28:21101 in the shade
- 28:23alright yes go to
- 28:25friendslikeuspod.com to invest in
- 28:27101 in the shade
- 28:28alright let's close back up the invention of the week
- 28:30is it
- 28:30what would you do if you're evil Columbus after you
- 28:34well see now this sounds boring
- 28:36because I think of the three options,
- 28:37I probably would try to rationalize with it.
- 28:42Oh, I see that that's...
- 28:43Well, okay, because...
- 28:44That's our producer, everyone.
- 28:45His name's Joe.
- 28:46Yeah, Joe reacted strongly to the idea that...
- 28:50Like, he gave me a face.
- 28:52To ration?
- 28:54Yeah, just like, what are you, stupid?
- 28:57Is that a stupid way to think?
- 28:59Well, why do they want to...
- 29:00I mean, you have...
- 29:01See, okay, so that's the thing.
- 29:03If they're genetic...
- 29:03So it must be something in their lived experience
- 29:06because that's the only difference between us that would make them.
- 29:10So then maybe I would try and get some lived experience of my own
- 29:14that would make me murderous and then try and kill them.
- 29:17See, I still thought you were trying to understand.
- 29:20Like, seek first to understand.
- 29:21Like, why do you hate me?
- 29:22Do you see me turn sideways?
- 29:25Yeah.
- 29:26Are you secretly a traffic camera that's seen how I really look when I drive?
- 29:30I don't know.
- 29:31Yeah, maybe I should just try and come up with a good kill situation.
- 29:36Would you ever really be convinced that they weren't going to...
- 29:41Like it was over?
- 29:43Yeah.
- 29:43No.
- 29:44I mean, it sucks that you can never hang out with your clone.
- 29:46I know.
- 29:48Although, what if you...
- 29:49I feel like if I had hung out with my clone, I would just be like,
- 29:52I fucking hate this person.
- 29:54No, actually, I have a brilliant idea.
- 29:57You send your clone to parties, and you hide behind plants,
- 30:00and you see how you do.
- 30:03Like how people respond to you.
- 30:06Oh, and then while you're hiding behind the plant, too,
- 30:08you can also, like, when your clone leaves,
- 30:10you can still hear that.
- 30:12Exactly.
- 30:15This clone just turned into an invention of the week.
- 30:18Stay tuned for next week's invention.
- 30:20Party clone.
- 30:21Home a clone.
- 30:21Oh, party clone's way better.
- 30:24That's great.
- 30:26Go to friendslikeuspod.com to invest in party clone.
- 30:32Wow.
- 30:36Uh, well, then, then wouldn't you just like send your clone to like, then at what point
- 30:40in time are you just like sending your clone to do all the dirty work?
- 30:44Maybe that's why they want to kill us.
- 30:45I get it now.
- 30:46I have it coming.
- 30:47That's why they want to.
- 30:49That would be good to know though.
- 30:51Hmm.
- 30:52All right.
- 30:53Well, uh, I think, I think we have our answers to the big questions of the week.
- 30:58Absolutely.
- 30:59The big question.
- 31:00Sugar crush.
- 31:02uh we do another little fun thing on this uh podcast uh before the pod starts the producer
- 31:12joe gives us a word for one of us to keep in mind and secretly say throughout the podcast
- 31:20and we try and slip it in i slipped mine in you did yes god everything sounded yes but everything
- 31:26sounded a conversation you said you said your word too yeah neither one of us picked up on it
- 31:31No, you didn't.
- 31:32So you have no idea?
- 31:34Do you have a guess what my word was?
- 31:36Was it killer?
- 31:39No.
- 31:41It was massaged.
- 31:43Oh, that's a good one.
- 31:45Although I think I made it present tense when I said it.
- 31:48Oh, I would have known.
- 31:49You were talking about the baby shaking.
- 31:51Yeah, and I could massage.
- 31:53I know, I was trying to figure out how to say that and be,
- 31:55I could have massaged it.
- 31:58I probably could have done it like that.
- 31:59Well, you've been disqualified on the technicality.
- 32:02It depends.
- 32:03Is your word boof?
- 32:08That would have been really brilliant.
- 32:11It would have been good.
- 32:12Because you didn't even say it.
- 32:15I just called it out because it sounded like you said boof.
- 32:18Oh, no.
- 32:20No, I have no idea what your word was.
- 32:22Okay, audience, feel free to go ahead and put it in the chat,
- 32:25what you think it was, and I'll give you a couple seconds.
- 32:28Super chat is.
- 32:29at our website chat.
- 32:31And the word was shrinkage.
- 32:34Oh.
- 32:35Do you remember me saying it?
- 32:37No.
- 32:37Because I did a great job.
- 32:39Yeah.
- 32:39Actually, I was impressed.
- 32:41In what context did you say shrinkage?
- 32:43The invention of the week.
- 32:44Yeah, I was talking about the invention
- 32:45and I was like,
- 32:46would you invest or would you buy it?
- 32:48Don't worry about this.
- 32:48Don't worry about shrinkage.
- 32:51Oh, wow.
- 32:52Yeah.
- 32:52Very good.
- 32:53Okay, we should kiss now.
- 32:54that's how we end every podcast uh well thanks for listening folks we have been friends like us