Latest / The Mental Healness Podcast / The Main Reason Narcissists Treat You Horribly
Transcript
- 0:00So what's the number one reason why narcissists treat you bad?
- 0:05Why they treat you like crap? What's the number one thing
- 0:07that's going on inside a narcissist's mind when they're
- 0:10behaving just horribly to you? When they're treating you like
- 0:13you're worth less than the crap you step on in a cow field?
- 0:17You're worth. Yeah.
- 0:18You work less than a cow Patty. They treat you like you work for
- 0:21less than a cow Patty. What's the number one reason?
- 0:23That's what we're talking about today, y'all.
- 0:24If you're new here, my name is Lee Hammock.
- 0:26I'm a diagnosed narcissist, and I give you the inside look at
- 0:28the mind of a narcissist, the inner workings of a narcissist
- 0:32mind. So we're gonna hop right into
- 0:33it, y'all, And I'm gonna just get straight to the I'm not
- 0:36going to bury the lead, as people might say.
- 0:38I'm going to get straight into the reasons a lot of narcissist
- 0:42toxic people, whomever treat you horribly because they don't
- 0:46think you're going to leave them alone in the video here.
- 0:50Bye now. But seriously, there are so many
- 0:56toxic, abusive, manipulative, narcissistic people.
- 0:59They really treat you bad because they don't ever think
- 1:02you're going to leave them. Yeah, and I and I look, they
- 1:06always think that you're going to be there.
- 1:07Especially if y'all have been going back and forth and you've
- 1:11forgiven them a bunch of times for the same thing.
- 1:13It like they've done the same behavior, they've done the same
- 1:17transgression. If they've done the same
- 1:20horrible thing over and over again and you've forgiven him
- 1:23and y'all have somehow made it work, then yes, in their minds,
- 1:27they don't think you're ever going to leave them alone.
- 1:30In the mind of a narcissist, they're thinking it is like,
- 1:32well you've been here this long, why would you leave right now?
- 1:36You've been with me this long. What what?
- 1:39Why would you leave now? I don't think you're going to
- 1:41leave me, so why would I treat you any better?
- 1:44And I know what I said to the people.
- 1:46People get angry, and I understand it.
- 1:49I you look, yeah, I understand why people would get angry when
- 1:52I said that. But that's how a lot of
- 1:54narcissist minds work. Seriously.
- 1:57We think that because you stay with us, because you are here
- 2:01with us, that you are OK with it.
- 2:04And yeah, it could be as simple as that.
- 2:06It really can. It could be as simple as
- 2:08thinking that you're OK with and thinking that you're never going
- 2:11to leave us alone. So you as someone who's dealing
- 2:16with a toxic, abusive, manipulative narcissist, you got
- 2:18to get into your mind. They're like, damn, wait a
- 2:20minute, Lee, you might be on to something because they.
- 2:24So. Yeah.
- 2:24And the crazy thing about it is there are some narcissists who
- 2:28absolutely open their mouths and tell you this.
- 2:30They will legitimately tell you that they think it's you.
- 2:33They that you. I didn't think you would ever
- 2:35leave. You could ask them straight up,
- 2:37you like, why you treat me so badly?
- 2:39And some of them will be looking directly in your face and be
- 2:42like, well, I just didn't think you were ever going to leave me
- 2:44alone. I thought you were going to
- 2:45always be here. I thought we I thought we were
- 2:47going to make it through the thick and thin times.
- 2:49I never thought things would be. I never thought things would be
- 2:55would give things would go apart like the way they have.
- 2:57I never thought that you would stand up for yourself.
- 2:59I never thought that you would set boundaries and stick to
- 3:01them. Some of them will directly be
- 3:04honest with you y'all. And the ones that are directly
- 3:07honest with you, if you take them back, they're what I'm
- 3:12trying to not make this come off as victim blame me.
- 3:15But if you take them back, you got to start wondering to
- 3:18yourself, like, why would they change?
- 3:20Like they were directly honest with me about why they treat me
- 3:23horribly and I took them back. And now I'm wondering why they
- 3:27won't change their behaviors. You see how you see how that
- 3:30sound right there? He's like, now I took, they
- 3:32treated me horribly. They, they let me know that they
- 3:34were going to treat me horribly. I took them back.
- 3:37They told me that they told me why they were treating me
- 3:39horribly. And now I'm supposed that now
- 3:42I'm expecting them to treat me better.
- 3:45You see how that sounds right there.
- 3:47You see how that would get how to a narcissist, that sounds
- 3:50kind of wild. He's like, OK, so let me let me
- 3:52let me make this make sense right here.
- 3:55I've been treating you horribly. Yes, I understand.
- 3:59I've treated you horribly. Like I told you why I treated
- 4:01you horribly. Yes.
- 4:02And you come back to me. Yes, I guess you're thinking
- 4:08that I'm going to change, right? Yes.
- 4:10And sometimes, yeah, sometimes the narcissist will lie to you
- 4:12about changing. They will lie to your ass about
- 4:14changing their behaviors. They absolutely will.
- 4:17Now, I'm seriously keeping it hot and ready with you.
- 4:19I'm seriously just being direct with you right now.
- 4:21When a narcissist tells you exactly what they're going to do
- 4:24to you, when they tell you, when they're looking at you directly
- 4:26in your face and just telling you straight up, like, hey,
- 4:28look, I'm going to treat you horribly.
- 4:31I'm not going to be better. I'm not going to change my
- 4:33behaviors. You have to make the decision
- 4:36about what you actually want from your life because they're
- 4:39telling you what they want from theirs.
- 4:41They're literally being direct and telling you exactly what
- 4:44they want from their life. They really are.
- 4:46They're telling you straight up what they want from you, what
- 4:50they're going to use you for and whatnot so they don't think
- 4:53you're going to leave. Look y'all, so society has
- 4:55convinced so many people that you have to be a damn ride or
- 4:58die to make things work like you.
- 5:00The best relationships are the ride or die relationships.
- 5:02But like one, typically in these ride or die relationships, only
- 5:06one person is riding and dying. The other person is the other
- 5:10person is driving. What?
- 5:12When have you? When's the last time you seen a
- 5:14car on the road that had two steering wheels?
- 5:17There was not a driver's Ed car. What When?
- 5:20Let let me know when does it? I said a car, not an airplane.
- 5:23Will there's airplanes that have copilots riding or dying?
- 5:27I say flying or dying. I said riding in a car.
- 5:29A vehicle. When the last time you seen a
- 5:31car, a functional vehicle, the everyday vehicle that has two
- 5:35steering wheels in it? That is not a driver's Ed car.
- 5:37It's ride or die. There's no room for two drivers.
- 5:43Somebody's going to be driving. You're going to be doing the
- 5:45riding and you're going to be to die.
- 5:47While they keep driving. They are strapped in.
- 5:49This is their car. Somebody else is going to be in
- 5:52it once. Once it once you they ride you
- 5:54until you die. Somebody else is going to be in
- 5:56the passenger seat riding or dying.
- 5:58So you got to ask yourself like, how much is your loyalty to this
- 6:01person worth? Is it worth your life?
- 6:03Because because again, they don't think you're ever going to
- 6:05leave. They think they can crash this
- 6:07damn vehicle as many times as they want to.
- 6:09They can cause as many crashes in this relationship vehicle as
- 6:13they want to. And they don't think you're
- 6:14going to make a move. They don't think you're going to
- 6:16change anything. They don't think you're going to
- 6:17move or just be leave them alone.
- 6:19They think you're always going to be there to get treated like
- 6:21crap. And are you are you, what
- 6:26indication have you gave given them that you're going to just
- 6:29be like, you know what? I'm done with them.
- 6:30I got to leave. What indication have you given
- 6:32them to say that I'm, I'm done, Lee, I'm not, I'm not going back
- 6:35to them. I'm going to, I'm definitely
- 6:36leaving. I'm definitely finished with
- 6:37this person. What have you shown?
- 6:39You know what I mean? Because you have to in order to
- 6:40heal. You got to be real in order to
- 6:42heal and set yourself free. You have to be realistic with
- 6:45yourself. What have you shown that just
- 6:48that says it's like I'm going to leave this person alone and be
- 6:51better. What have you shown that prove
- 6:53that that prove that to be true because it it's possible.
- 6:56I'm not saying it's not possible because it's definitely
- 6:58possible. But what have you shown to say
- 7:01that this is going to be OK That, that, that you're going to
- 7:03change. Things are going to change up
- 7:05and you're going to be better and things are going to be
- 7:06better. What has been shown to prove
- 7:08that to be true? That's what I ask you right now.
- 7:12Brothers and sisters would gather.
- 7:14Pastor Lee coming back, right? Pastor Lee coming back.
- 7:18Brothers and sisters, gather here today to let you know that
- 7:22narcissists and toxic people are not going to change their
- 7:24behaviors. No matter what, how much work
- 7:26that you put in, no matter how much you want them to change,
- 7:29they are not going to change, brothers and sisters, they're
- 7:31going to be toxic as hell. So you got to make a decision
- 7:35for yourself. You got to be better for
- 7:38yourself. You got to want more for
- 7:41yourself. Because if you don't, my
- 7:44brothers and sisters, you going to live a life of full of
- 7:47regret, despair, toxicity and unhappiness.
- 7:52You got to choose what you want from life.
- 7:53Y'all. I'm just telling you, these
- 7:55toxic narcissistic people are always going to pick and choose
- 7:59what's best for them. Always.
- 8:03And it's like I said, but Lee, so I don't matter to them.
- 8:05And y'all asking the wrong questions.
- 8:07You're asking the wrong question when you're giving up, Lee.
- 8:09I don't matter to them at all. Like what's going on here?
- 8:11Like can I what, what, what can I do?
- 8:13What can I do to make things better?
- 8:14You can choose you. What's so wrong?
- 8:17Yeah, what's so wrong with choosing yourself right here?
- 8:21What's so wrong with that? I know the narcissist or tax
- 8:23person, whoever has convinced you that it's wrong for you to
- 8:26pick yourself. It's wrong somehow wrong for you
- 8:29to choose yourself and to leave them.
- 8:30In the past, they have convinced you that somehow you're a bad
- 8:33person for choosing yourself. They have convinced you that
- 8:36somehow you are a bad person for not acquiescing to all of their
- 8:40requests. That's crazy.
- 8:44It really is y'all. I do want the best for y'all.
- 8:45I really do. I want y'all to win.
- 8:48I really, really want y'all to win.
- 8:50That's why I do these videos because narcissists don't ever
- 8:54think you're going to leave them alone.
- 8:55And some of your friends and family members don't think
- 8:58you're going to leave them alone.
- 8:59Some of y'all don't think you're going to leave them alone.
- 9:01So let's keep it real, y'all. I'll keep it real.
- 9:04Some of some of some of y'all in in this situation in your mind,
- 9:07you don't ever think you're going to leave them alone.
- 9:10So if you're thinking it, your mind is going to try to find a
- 9:12way to make it true. You have to make a plan in order
- 9:15to fully set yourself free and to release yourself in this
- 9:17toxicity or this is your life. This is your life review.
- 9:22This is the thing about this right here.
- 9:23Y'all in in closing thing about I want y'all to think about this
- 9:25right here. close your eyes and imagine the world 10/15/20 years
- 9:30from now. Pick one of those times in your
- 9:32life. You're watching this video
- 9:34because most of y'all are unhappy in relationship dynamic,
- 9:36right? Thank you Dylan with a
- 9:37narcissist. You're watching this video.
- 9:39Imagine 10 years from now, 15 years from now, 20 years from
- 9:43now. You're still with this person
- 9:45and nothing has changed. Nothing.
- 9:49The behaviors have stayed the same.
- 9:50If anything, they've gotten worse because now you're getting
- 9:52used to them, right? What?
- 9:55How would you feel? Would you feel like you wasted
- 9:5710/15/20 years of your life? Or would you feel like, you know
- 9:59what, I made the right decision? Answer that question truthfully
- 10:05because most people wouldn't answer that question.
- 10:06They'll be like hell no. I feel like I made a huge
- 10:08mistake. I feel like I live my I didn't
- 10:10get the I didn't get the opportunity to live my life to
- 10:13the fullest because I spent so much time trying to give this
- 10:16person what they didn't deserve me.
- 10:19You try to give them more of what they don't deserve, which
- 10:22is you. Most people, most narcissistic
- 10:24people don't deserve you y'all. They don't deserve to have you
- 10:28in their lives. They don't deserve any bit and
- 10:30piece of you. But so many people are still
- 10:33stuck in these toxic relationships.
- 10:34So ask yourself that question. Serious question, would you feel
- 10:37like you wasted time with this person because of how things
- 10:40have went? Seriously.
- 10:42Because narcissists, I will tell you this right here.
- 10:44Narcissists don't feel like they're wasting their time with
- 10:47you. I promise you that right there.
- 10:49Narcissistic people do not feel like they're wasting their time
- 10:53because they're getting whatever they want from you, right?
- 10:57Whatever they want from you, whatever they want from you,
- 10:59whatever they're needing from you, they're getting.
- 11:01In some way, shape or form, they are.
- 11:05So why would they leave you alone?
- 11:06If they're getting their needs met, Whatever their needs are,
- 11:10they're being met by you. So why would they leave you be?
- 11:14That's a question you have to ask yourself, y'all.
- 11:16Anyway, y'all, thank you for tuning in.
- 11:17Thank you for clicking through this video.
- 11:18Thank you for watching it to the end as well.
- 11:21If you watch this to this end and you want to do a Zoom call,
- 11:24you can go to my website, mentalillness.net and enter the
- 11:26code mental 10 for 10% off the Zoom calls or whatnot, y'all.
- 11:32That also works on my courses and stuff like that too.
- 11:34Mental ten. Hit that subscribe button y'all,
- 11:36and I am out. Peace.