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How can I build healthy flexibility into routines? · Wellbeing Solutions - Ask A Counsellor

• 0:00
  SPEAKER_00: Hearing about routines in a neurodivergent-informed way.
• 0:03
  SPEAKER_00: Their aim isn't necessarily to create the perfect routine that we follow to the book every day.
• 0:09
  SPEAKER_00: It's more about creating enough predictability to feel supported while also allowing flexibility for changes in energy, sensory needs, emotions, and capacity.
• 0:21
  SPEAKER_00: So looking at how to do that healthily rather than seeing flexibility as a routine failing, we can explore what happens for us when our routines change unexpectedly.
• 0:35
  SPEAKER_00: Does it feel manageable or can even a small change create a sense of overwhelm?
• 0:40
  SPEAKER_00: Sometimes, particularly when a routine helps us feel safe and organised, an unexpected life change can feel much bigger than it might appear on the outside.
• 0:49
  SPEAKER_00: So rather than judging that response, we become curious about what your brain and what your body are needing in that moment.
• 0:56
  SPEAKER_00: That's how we successfully build flexibility into the routine.
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  SPEAKER_00: One approach to build flexibility in the routine is from the beginning.
• 1:05
  SPEAKER_00: Instead of having one fixed version of the day, we can think about having different versions depending on capacity.
• 1:11
  SPEAKER_00: For example, you might have a full capacity version, a reduced capacity version, and a minimum version of your routine.
• 1:20
  SPEAKER_00: The anchor points that we discussed previously stay broadly the same, but what happens around them can change.
• 1:26
  SPEAKER_00: So rather than thinking I have to complete everything on my list, we might ask what are the essentials today and what would be helpful if I have capacity and what can we?
• 1:37
  SPEAKER_00: A key in this is reducing all or nothing thinking.
• 1:41
  SPEAKER_00: This can help with maintaining flexibility.
• 1:45
  SPEAKER_00: Flexibility doesn't mean abandoning the routine altogether, it might just mean adjusting it.
• 1:50
  SPEAKER_00: If you can't do the whole task, could you do a smaller version?
• 1:54
  SPEAKER_00: If you can't follow the usual routine, could you keep one or two anchor points?
• 1:59
  SPEAKER_00: If something unexpected happens, could you have a prepared alternative rather than feeling that the whole day has been disrupted?
• 2:07
  SPEAKER_00: We also want to consider sensory and cognitive load.
• 2:10
  SPEAKER_00: A routine that looks manageable on paper might actually require lots of transitions, time monitoring, decision making, or sensory processing.
• 2:19
  SPEAKER_00: So flexibility in that regard might involve reducing transitions, leaving more space between commitments, building in recovery time, or allowing yourself to change a plan when your capacity is lower.
• 2:32
  SPEAKER_00: So healthy flexibility with neurodivergency in mind, it's not about becoming comfortable with anything changing.
• 2:42
  SPEAKER_00: That might always feel like it's a bit of a trigger.
• 2:45
  SPEAKER_00: It's about creating a routine that has enough support and enough structure that is able to make you feel safe while adding enough flexibility to accommodate you.
• 2:58
  SPEAKER_00: A good first step is identifying your key anchor points and then thinking about what a high, medium, and low capacity version of your routine could look like.
• 3:08
  SPEAKER_00: The aim is not to make yourself fit the routine, the routine is there to support you.