Latest / The Breakfast Club / Best of full interview: Gia & Envy Talk 'Real Life, Real Family,' Parenting Styles; 'Casey Crew,' Trials, Tribulations +More

Transcript

Best of full interview: Gia & Envy Talk 'Real Life, Real Family,' Parenting Styles; 'Casey Crew,' Trials, Tribulations +More · The Breakfast Club

• 0:00
  Speaker 1: Wake that ass up in the morning.
• 0:02
  Speaker 2: The Breakfast Club.
• 0:05
  Speaker 3: Yeah, it's the world most dangerous. Wanting to show to
• 0:06
  Speaker 3: breakfast Club Charlamagne the God. Laura le Ross is here,
• 0:10
  Speaker 3: just hilarious?
• 0:11
  Speaker 2: Is here?
• 0:12
  Speaker 3: Uh?
• 0:12
  Speaker 2: Who's feeling in for envy? Laura l Rosse is feeling
• 0:14
  Speaker 2: in for envy? Is it me feeling in? He's here?
• 0:16
  Speaker 1: I'm here, but she's feeling in? Yeah.
• 0:18
  Speaker 3: Yeah, he's a guest today though, because his new book,
• 0:21
  Speaker 3: Real Life, Real Family with the Queen of the House
• 0:24
  Speaker 3: Gia Casey is out right now will come like April fifteen.
• 0:27
  Speaker 1: Because April fifteenth.
• 0:28
  Speaker 2: Yes, how you feeling?
• 0:29
  Speaker 4: You humbled by being given the opportunity to write a
• 0:34
  Speaker 4: book about something that is the most important thing to me,
• 0:39
  Speaker 4: the thing I'm the most passionate about, the thing that
• 0:42
  Speaker 4: brings me the most joy family, parenting, my household, our home.
• 0:47
  Speaker 4: So yes, I'm very humbled.
• 0:50
  Speaker 5: This is the second book. Yes, it's amazing. You know what,
• 0:53
  Speaker 5: let's just rewind it big for those who don't know
• 0:58
  Speaker 5: who is the Casey screted? Where did that name come from?
• 1:00
  Speaker 5: How did y'all get started?
• 1:01
  Speaker 2: Do you remember the Ksey Crew? Yes?
• 1:04
  Speaker 1: Our last name?
• 1:05
  Speaker 2: What do you mean?
• 1:05
  Speaker 6: No?
• 1:05
  Speaker 4: No, no, but do you remember how we came up
• 1:07
  Speaker 4: with the name.
• 1:07
  Speaker 1: How do we come up with the name.
• 1:08
  Speaker 4: We were doing our first podcast, and it was before
• 1:12
  Speaker 4: we were doing like the audio version of the video version.
• 1:15
  Speaker 4: It was just the audio version, and we started the
• 1:17
  Speaker 4: podcast without a name. And we sat there and we
• 1:20
  Speaker 4: kind of was coming up with like different names, and
• 1:24
  Speaker 4: one of us said, well, how about the k C crew.
• 1:26
  Speaker 4: You know, our last name is Casey. We have a
• 1:27
  Speaker 4: whole crew of kids, a whole gaggle. What about the
• 1:29
  Speaker 4: k C Crew. And then people you know, DMed us
• 1:32
  Speaker 4: and emailed and whatnot, and they said, yeah, we love
• 1:34
  Speaker 4: that name. We love that name. So we decided to
• 1:37
  Speaker 4: call ourselves the KC Crew.
• 1:38
  Speaker 1: Amazing that's where it came about.
• 1:40
  Speaker 6: And whenever you post on social you always hashtag the
• 1:44
  Speaker 6: k C Crew. Yes, MV does as well. But one
• 1:46
  Speaker 6: of the things that you guys were really good from
• 1:48
  Speaker 6: the podcast to bringing it online is you pay attention
• 1:51
  Speaker 6: to the comments and the responses.
• 1:53
  Speaker 1: Kia.
• 1:54
  Speaker 4: Yeah, and you.
• 1:54
  Speaker 6: Guys bring them into the podcast, but you also like
• 1:57
  Speaker 6: reflect on them on social media. So I want to
• 1:59
  Speaker 6: read one of the the posts that we pulled in.
• 2:02
  Speaker 6: I thought that this was great. You inspired me. This
• 2:04
  Speaker 6: is someone commenting to you, guys. You inspired me. I
• 2:06
  Speaker 6: wish all parents had this level of intention, planning and vibe.
• 2:10
  Speaker 6: Truth is, most parents, moms are stressed, over worked by
• 2:14
  Speaker 6: trying to make ends meet, in harboring trauma. Therefore, it's
• 2:17
  Speaker 6: passed down to the children. You've passed down light and
• 2:20
  Speaker 6: love because of that and because of what you are,
• 2:22
  Speaker 6: high five to all of the parents doing their best.
• 2:25
  Speaker 6: And you use that as a moment to talk about like, no,
• 2:27
  Speaker 6: it gets a little crazy over here, but oh yeah,
• 2:30
  Speaker 6: but it's important because when you if you've ever been
• 2:32
  Speaker 6: around your family, it is a lot of love and
• 2:33
  Speaker 6: a lot of light.
• 2:34
  Speaker 7: But I'm sure on the inside things get crazy.
• 2:36
  Speaker 4: Well, you know, that's a big misconception. People assume that
• 2:40
  Speaker 4: because you live a certain lifestyle or because you've earned
• 2:43
  Speaker 4: a certain financial status, that you don't have the same
• 2:47
  Speaker 4: problems that they have. You know, in the same comment section,
• 2:51
  Speaker 4: you'll see people like, oh, it's easy when you have money. Oh,
• 2:54
  Speaker 4: you know, like your problems are not our problems. But
• 2:59
  Speaker 4: that is such a misconception. You know, we just got
• 3:02
  Speaker 4: over one of the toughest years of our lives, probably
• 3:05
  Speaker 4: the worst year of our life. And yeah, the last
• 3:09
  Speaker 4: two years have been and that's a conversation for another day.
• 3:12
  Speaker 4: But we've gone through a lot of trauma, a lot
• 3:16
  Speaker 4: of disappointment, a lot of heartache, a lot of sadness,
• 3:20
  Speaker 4: and things that we had to shield our children from,
• 3:23
  Speaker 4: things that we had to figure out how to keep
• 3:27
  Speaker 4: that brave face and how to not let it affect
• 3:31
  Speaker 4: our family foundation. You know, because that trickle down effect
• 3:36
  Speaker 4: is so real. Your kids know when you're not happy,
• 3:40
  Speaker 4: they know when you're stressed, they know when you're struggling,
• 3:43
  Speaker 4: they know when you're upset with one another, and they
• 3:46
  Speaker 4: receive that energy and they project that energy. And that's
• 3:50
  Speaker 4: something that is universal because there's not a single family
• 3:54
  Speaker 4: out there that doesn't have trials, tribulations, heartache, setbacks, finance
• 4:00
  Speaker 4: stress is I don't care who you are, you have
• 4:02
  Speaker 4: experienced that. So financial abundance, financial security, even for people
• 4:09
  Speaker 4: that have that, that in and of itself doesn't mean
• 4:12
  Speaker 4: that you're happy. Some of the most miserable people that
• 4:15
  Speaker 4: I know do very very well. It doesn't mean that
• 4:19
  Speaker 4: you come along with the skill set to know how
• 4:23
  Speaker 4: to live a happy life and how to teach your
• 4:26
  Speaker 4: children how to have a happy life. So that comment
• 4:30
  Speaker 4: really really stood out to me because she spoke on
• 4:34
  Speaker 4: the troubles and the trauma and the word trauma that
• 4:37
  Speaker 4: she used, and Rashan will speak on the word trauma.
• 4:39
  Speaker 4: Sometimes he feels as though it's a word that's overused,
• 4:43
  Speaker 4: but it's a word that represents something that so many
• 4:47
  Speaker 4: people endure. The difference now is that we have words
• 4:51
  Speaker 4: to identify how we feel and what we go through,
• 4:55
  Speaker 4: and it's articulated. Because when our feelings and our experience,
• 5:00
  Speaker 4: says are articulated, then you're able to communicate. People are
• 5:04
  Speaker 4: able to understand you, You're able to understand other people.
• 5:07
  Speaker 4: You're able to have empathy and compassion for other people
• 5:09
  Speaker 4: because now we're all speaking in universal language. Like the
• 5:13
  Speaker 4: word triggered, like the word trauma, like the word gas.
• 5:17
  Speaker 4: You know, these are things that some may think are
• 5:20
  Speaker 4: overused now, but yes, but there is value there. There
• 5:25
  Speaker 4: is value there because now we can see each other,
• 5:28
  Speaker 4: we understand each other.
• 5:30
  Speaker 2: When you're trying to create.
• 5:30
  Speaker 3: A safe space, you know, how is it to venture
• 5:33
  Speaker 3: into an unsafe space like the.
• 5:34
  Speaker 2: Comments, especially when somebody looks on the air every day,
• 5:38
  Speaker 2: you know what I mean? You have an opinion about.
• 5:40
  Speaker 4: Every day, so I read every single comment. I interact.
• 5:48
  Speaker 4: It started when I had a lower follower account. It
• 5:52
  Speaker 4: started because I always felt that if someone follows me,
• 5:57
  Speaker 4: that's an investment in a small invent maybe, but it's
• 6:01
  Speaker 4: an investment that they put into me. And they're looking
• 6:05
  Speaker 4: at my content content, they're looking at my pictures. And
• 6:08
  Speaker 4: you left a comment, I want to respond back to you.
• 6:11
  Speaker 4: I used to respond to almost every comment, you know,
• 6:14
  Speaker 4: but then when my followers went up, I wasn't really
• 6:17
  Speaker 4: able to do that. And that was something that you know,
• 6:20
  Speaker 4: I had to take that on the chin. I wasn't
• 6:22
  Speaker 4: able to. But it's a sign of respect. And you said,
• 6:28
  Speaker 4: why do I do that to myself? Because I'm strong
• 6:30
  Speaker 4: enough to do that. I'm strong enough to do that.
• 6:33
  Speaker 4: The comments don't if they are negative, and I have
• 6:37
  Speaker 4: to say, I don't receive a lot of negative comments, thankfully,
• 6:41
  Speaker 4: thank God. But if they are negative, I look at
• 6:44
  Speaker 4: it as insight. I might ask myself, why might someone
• 6:48
  Speaker 4: have that perspective? Why may you have drawn that conclusion?
• 6:52
  Speaker 4: To me? It feeds my mental because I'm a thinker.
• 6:55
  Speaker 4: I'm a deep thinker. I'm all over things. I love
• 6:59
  Speaker 4: to understand people, I love the concepts that kind of
• 7:03
  Speaker 4: creates society. I love to understand cause and effect relationships
• 7:07
  Speaker 4: and things of that nature. So for me, the comments
• 7:11
  Speaker 4: are food and they also bring me happiness when they're good.
• 7:14
  Speaker 4: It lets you know that you're reaching someone whatever it
• 7:17
  Speaker 4: is that you're putting out, because it's in the sense
• 7:19
  Speaker 4: of sharing. There's a lot of things that I don't share,
• 7:22
  Speaker 4: you know what I mean. So if I choose to
• 7:25
  Speaker 4: share and it's well received, then that's a good feeling.
• 7:27
  Speaker 4: I think that's why a lot of people are on
• 7:29
  Speaker 4: or part of the reason why a lot of people
• 7:30
  Speaker 4: are on social media, you know what I mean. And
• 7:32
  Speaker 4: I'm strong enough to do so, and that's because of
• 7:35
  Speaker 4: the way that I was raised. I was raised to
• 7:38
  Speaker 4: be a very strong and resilient woman. It comes directly
• 7:44
  Speaker 4: from my parents, and I'm fortunate in the sense that
• 7:48
  Speaker 4: I can look back and identify things about the way
• 7:54
  Speaker 4: that I was raised that created the individual, the woman,
• 7:58
  Speaker 4: the mother, the wife that I am, and it's for me.
• 8:02
  Speaker 4: It's a very beautiful thing. Both of my parents are
• 8:04
  Speaker 4: no longer here, so to be able to say, wow,
• 8:07
  Speaker 4: when my mother did this every single day, or when
• 8:11
  Speaker 4: she took me here once a week or when she
• 8:13
  Speaker 4: said this to me, and those compliments, and that the
• 8:17
  Speaker 4: way that she fed me and she fed my soul,
• 8:19
  Speaker 4: and the joy that I experienced, and the amount of
• 8:22
  Speaker 4: fun that I had as a kid, like I loved
• 8:24
  Speaker 4: my life. And it's not because we were wealthy. We
• 8:26
  Speaker 4: were not. We were a middle class family. I'm from Brooklyn,
• 8:29
  Speaker 4: from East Flatbush. We weren't raised, you know, like I'm
• 8:32
  Speaker 4: from an urban area. And it's not. It had nothing
• 8:35
  Speaker 4: to do with money. It had nothing to do with wealth.
• 8:39
  Speaker 4: It had everything to do with what my parents poured
• 8:42
  Speaker 4: into my home and the love that I felt. And
• 8:46
  Speaker 4: that is what we put into writing this book. There's
• 8:50
  Speaker 4: a lot of books that we could have written, you know,
• 8:52
  Speaker 4: so many ideas came out because Real Life for Love
• 8:54
  Speaker 4: was a huge success. It was a national bestseller. So's
• 8:57
  Speaker 4: I go, you write book about this? You writ we said,
• 8:59
  Speaker 4: we write book about family. It's what we know best.
• 9:03
  Speaker 4: It's what we know best. We've had so many ups,
• 9:05
  Speaker 4: so many downs, so many wins, so many losses, so
• 9:09
  Speaker 4: many things that we thought we were doing right that
• 9:11
  Speaker 4: we weren't. That we had to regroup and make sure
• 9:14
  Speaker 4: that we were balanced, you know, as as a married
• 9:17
  Speaker 4: couple because when we didn't agree, it's like my way
• 9:21
  Speaker 4: is better, know what my way is better? And this,
• 9:23
  Speaker 4: you know, we have to come to a meeting of
• 9:24
  Speaker 4: the minds. Yeah, you know what I mean. So a relationship,
• 9:29
  Speaker 4: you know, the relationship grew, you know, because we had
• 9:33
  Speaker 4: to learn how to see eye to eye as parents.
• 9:35
  Speaker 4: So there was just there was many, many ups and downs,
• 9:37
  Speaker 4: and we wanted to pour that all into a book,
• 9:40
  Speaker 4: you know. We wanted to let everyone know like it's
• 9:43
  Speaker 4: really that village mentality. It's really that like we are
• 9:46
  Speaker 4: a community, especially our black community because I'm black, yes, yeah, yeah,
• 9:52
  Speaker 4: for the record, for the record, some Spanish blood. But
• 10:07
  Speaker 4: it's like I know that you're well aware because you
• 10:10
  Speaker 4: speak to things of this nature often. But our history
• 10:16
  Speaker 4: is being erased in schools and it's being stripped away
• 10:22
  Speaker 4: silently in society. So the foundation starts in our homes.
• 10:28
  Speaker 4: We have to teach children how to identify themselves. We
• 10:33
  Speaker 4: have to teach children that sense of belonging and they
• 10:39
  Speaker 4: have to understand that they come from something meaningful. And
• 10:45
  Speaker 4: if you leave it up to society to teach them that,
• 10:48
  Speaker 4: you're going to wind up with children that are lost
• 10:51
  Speaker 4: that are overlooked, that don't know how to identify themselves,
• 10:55
  Speaker 4: that get taken advantage of, and that are susceptible to
• 10:59
  Speaker 4: what society wants for them. So for us, our core,
• 11:03
  Speaker 4: our nucleus, our foundation, our home superseds anything else in
• 11:10
  Speaker 4: this world. We put our family first.
• 11:14
  Speaker 8: Would you say that you and and we have two
• 11:18
  Speaker 8: different parenting styles?
• 11:20
  Speaker 5: It was the more lenient parent. Who was the more
• 11:22
  Speaker 5: lenient parent?
• 11:24
  Speaker 1: It depends what it is like.
• 11:26
  Speaker 9: You know, everybody knows my dad is retired police officer
• 11:28
  Speaker 9: and ex military, so I'm disciplined. I was the yell
• 11:31
  Speaker 9: of the screamer because I said, so is a lot different,
• 11:35
  Speaker 9: Like she wants to know why did you feel that
• 11:38
  Speaker 9: she likes to break down?
• 11:39
  Speaker 2: You don't get it.
• 11:40
  Speaker 8: You're gonna get it by the end of the right exactly.
• 11:44
  Speaker 9: So you got to think, really think before you speak
• 11:46
  Speaker 9: to us, because she's like, all right, well, explain that,
• 11:48
  Speaker 9: like I just said it, just because no, no, no, explain this.
• 11:51
  Speaker 9: But so I'm more like, because I said so, she's
• 11:54
  Speaker 9: more like, well, you can't go to the more because
• 11:56
  Speaker 9: of this, because this could happen. Explain your parenting style
• 11:59
  Speaker 9: mine is my dad was like, no, and you didn't
• 12:01
  Speaker 9: ask why, it just it was what it was.
• 12:03
  Speaker 1: You just figured out later.
• 12:05
  Speaker 2: Is a little different. I prefer the explanation.
• 12:07
  Speaker 4: Yeah. So that's how my parents were with me. I
• 12:11
  Speaker 4: knew that my parents were invested in me living a happy,
• 12:17
  Speaker 4: fulfilled and fun life. And we didn't go lightly on
• 12:20
  Speaker 4: the fun. And because I knew that at end, and
• 12:25
  Speaker 4: my parents never said no just for the sake of
• 12:27
  Speaker 4: saying no. Because parents are overworked and they are stressed,
• 12:31
  Speaker 4: and the last thing they want to hear when they
• 12:32
  Speaker 4: walk through the door is Mommy, can I can you
• 12:35
  Speaker 4: take me here? Can you buy me this? Can we
• 12:37
  Speaker 4: watch this together? Can we go like slow down?
• 12:40
  Speaker 6: No?
• 12:41
  Speaker 4: And sometimes you say no, you don't even know why
• 12:43
  Speaker 4: you're saying no. That's not a good parenting technique. You
• 12:48
  Speaker 4: really have to take a moment. You have to take
• 12:50
  Speaker 4: a beat. We all have to take a beat to
• 12:52
  Speaker 4: listen to our children and be patient. And because I
• 12:56
  Speaker 4: knew that my parents were invested in me that way,
• 13:00
  Speaker 4: I knew that when they said no there was a
• 13:02
  Speaker 4: good reason. Because they would never slight me. They would
• 13:05
  Speaker 4: never tell me no because they were too tired. They
• 13:07
  Speaker 4: would never tell me no just because they didn't want
• 13:10
  Speaker 4: to be bothered. So it's like, oh, well, if mommy
• 13:12
  Speaker 4: said no, that means that I'm not supposed to be there,
• 13:16
  Speaker 4: or that means that she genuinely can't take me. And
• 13:19
  Speaker 4: they both would take the time to explain to me,
• 13:22
  Speaker 4: you know, like, you don't want to go to that
• 13:24
  Speaker 4: party in Conye Island because in that neighborhood there's a
• 13:28
  Speaker 4: lot of shooting and da data and you're a young girl.
• 13:31
  Speaker 4: And I'll take it a step further. You know what
• 13:33
  Speaker 4: my parents used to do from time to time. They
• 13:35
  Speaker 4: would take me to a party, not the one in
• 13:37
  Speaker 4: Coney Island, but a party and they would park and
• 13:40
  Speaker 4: wait outside for me for two or three hours until
• 13:44
  Speaker 4: I came out. And this was before cell phones and
• 13:47
  Speaker 4: all that stuff. My dad had this little portable TV
• 13:50
  Speaker 4: and he would recline his seat, set the portable TV
• 13:53
  Speaker 4: up on the dashboard, and just watch TV until or
• 13:56
  Speaker 4: whatever it was that he was watching, until I came out.
• 13:58
  Speaker 4: That let me know that my parents rooted for me.
• 14:01
  Speaker 4: They wanted me to enjoy life. So when they told
• 14:04
  Speaker 4: me no, I knew that I had no business considering it.
• 14:08
  Speaker 4: Considering whatever it was that I was considering.
• 14:11
  Speaker 1: Take a step forward.
• 14:12
  Speaker 9: The other day, London, which is our eleven year old,
• 14:14
  Speaker 9: wanted to walk to a friend's.
• 14:15
  Speaker 1: House after school.
• 14:16
  Speaker 2: A friend's house was a.
• 14:17
  Speaker 1: Block away, two blocks, two blocks.
• 14:20
  Speaker 9: Gear drives in a car, looking like a stalker and
• 14:22
  Speaker 9: followed them the two blocks as they're walking. But London, no,
• 14:27
  Speaker 9: London was like, that's my mom following us.
• 14:28
  Speaker 2: I don't worry.
• 14:29
  Speaker 1: But she just wanted to walk, and Gear followed her
• 14:31
  Speaker 1: ass right to that house.
• 14:32
  Speaker 4: Well, the thing is that you know, she's eleven, so
• 14:34
  Speaker 4: she wants to all of her friends, all of them
• 14:37
  Speaker 4: they walk home from school because they all live in
• 14:39
  Speaker 4: the same neighborhood and they all walk home. But London
• 14:43
  Speaker 4: is not allowed to walk home. No, absolutely, positively not.
• 14:46
  Speaker 4: And there's there's this very significant reason for it, well
• 14:50
  Speaker 4: at least a partial reason. And I said, all right, babe,
• 14:53
  Speaker 4: you can walk, but I'm going to follow you those
• 14:56
  Speaker 4: two blocks. She was like, okay, mommy, no problem. Meanwhile,
• 14:59
  Speaker 4: you have a their kids that might be like, oh
• 15:02
  Speaker 4: why can't I just can't you trust me eleven? I'm
• 15:06
  Speaker 4: not stupid, you know, other kids would rebel. Our kids
• 15:09
  Speaker 4: are so conditioned to understanding that it's for their safety
• 15:14
  Speaker 4: and they welcome it, especially like our oldest Madison, Madison,
• 15:19
  Speaker 4: when she went to college, she was like, can you
• 15:22
  Speaker 4: chip me? Put a chip, like, put a chip in
• 15:27
  Speaker 4: her arm because.
• 15:31
  Speaker 9: It was almost kidnapped as a kid. They try to
• 15:32
  Speaker 9: grab her the door, someone face being cut. So we
• 15:37
  Speaker 9: are very extra.
• 15:39
  Speaker 1: When it comes to our kids.
• 15:40
  Speaker 9: And then you know, Charlemagne and you guys know things
• 15:42
  Speaker 9: that has happened, you know, behind the scenes, but we're
• 15:44
  Speaker 9: very careful when it comes to the kids.
• 15:45
  Speaker 4: Yeah, when I was nine, a man tried to abduct
• 15:48
  Speaker 4: me and it was awful.
• 15:50
  Speaker 1: She was walking the door and all that.
• 15:53
  Speaker 4: He choked me out like he he had a change
• 15:56
  Speaker 4: of clothes hidden. He was caught.
• 15:58
  Speaker 7: He was caught.
• 15:59
  Speaker 4: But that's the h's Yeah, that story is in the book.
• 16:03
  Speaker 4: But you know, so I experience, I understand. I come
• 16:06
  Speaker 4: from a place where I understand that the worst can
• 16:09
  Speaker 4: happen to you, you know, because we go through lifehily like,
• 16:12
  Speaker 4: oh no, that happens to other people, you know, other
• 16:14
  Speaker 4: people go through things like that. I've been through so
• 16:17
  Speaker 4: much that I understand that the worst can happen to you.
• 16:22
  Speaker 4: So I protect my kids with vigilance because of that
• 16:26
  Speaker 4: personal knowledge that I have of it.
• 16:28
  Speaker 2: Yeah, how make sure you not? You're raising the kids
• 16:30
  Speaker 2: out of love and not fear at all.
• 16:32
  Speaker 4: That's such a good question. It comes with the explanations,
• 16:37
  Speaker 4: do you know what I mean. I don't tell them
• 16:39
  Speaker 4: you can't do this and you can't do that. Why
• 16:43
  Speaker 4: because I said so. Let me explain to you why.
• 16:46
  Speaker 4: You know, sometimes we'll watch the news together, you know,
• 16:49
  Speaker 4: when they're at an appropriate age, at about nine years old.
• 16:53
  Speaker 4: You know, I think that they're mature enough to ingest
• 16:55
  Speaker 4: certain things. So what I do is I would record
• 16:57
  Speaker 4: it on my DVR and then cherry pick different stories
• 17:01
  Speaker 4: that I think that are appropriate, that speak to the
• 17:04
  Speaker 4: protective measures that we take on them, you know what
• 17:08
  Speaker 4: I mean. So it's like, if I see a child
• 17:10
  Speaker 4: abduction that's not too traumatic, I might save that and
• 17:14
  Speaker 4: then show it to a child that's old enough.
• 17:16
  Speaker 10: You know.
• 17:16
  Speaker 4: I did it with Madison, I did it with Logan,
• 17:19
  Speaker 4: and I find that they take that into their adult
• 17:22
  Speaker 4: lives and they're very very Madison Like, Madison walks around
• 17:27
  Speaker 4: like a police officer. She has a boyfriend. His name
• 17:29
  Speaker 4: is Andrew, and when they go into a restaurant, she's
• 17:32
  Speaker 4: the one that sits facing the door. She feels like
• 17:35
  Speaker 4: the protective force in that relationship because her head is
• 17:39
  Speaker 4: always on swivel, you know what I mean. She could
• 17:42
  Speaker 4: tell you a car that was driving six cars ahead,
• 17:46
  Speaker 4: you know, and she's always paying attention to license plates.
• 17:49
  Speaker 4: When she was young, I used to go through like
• 17:54
  Speaker 4: in case you get kidnapped scenarios because it's the type
• 17:58
  Speaker 4: of information that can save a child's life. It's the
• 18:10
  Speaker 4: type of information that can save a life, especially now
• 18:16
  Speaker 4: with all of this human trafficking and all the stories
• 18:20
  Speaker 4: with you know you they put like a zip a
• 18:23
  Speaker 4: zip tag on your on your on your door, and
• 18:26
  Speaker 4: they put a dollar or money near your there's there's
• 18:29
  Speaker 4: all these techniques. Girls are being taken. So if you
• 18:34
  Speaker 4: have a young girl, it is very proactive to educate
• 18:38
  Speaker 4: them about the realities and the tricks and the cons
• 18:42
  Speaker 4: that people. You know, because even me, as proactive as
• 18:45
  Speaker 4: I try to be, that whole technique with a baby
• 18:48
  Speaker 4: crying outside your house, I would I would be inclined
• 18:52
  Speaker 4: to open the door if I hear a baby crying
• 18:54
  Speaker 4: and someone that sounds like a mother yelling and screaming
• 18:57
  Speaker 4: outside the house. I am that type of person, but
• 19:00
  Speaker 4: not me. But now I am, I am, but I
• 19:07
  Speaker 4: would my heart with my ie would be inclined to
• 19:10
  Speaker 4: open that door. But now with all the knowledge and
• 19:12
  Speaker 4: some of the good things about social media is that
• 19:15
  Speaker 4: so much knowledge is being spread, so now we're consuming
• 19:19
  Speaker 4: good information as well. So I heard that, I'm like, wow,
• 19:23
  Speaker 4: that's absolutely absolutely right. It jogs your thinking, It makes
• 19:27
  Speaker 4: you say, oh, wait a minute, I do have to
• 19:29
  Speaker 4: put myself first, even if someone else, a stranger, seems
• 19:33
  Speaker 4: to be in need. I have to prioritize myself, my home,
• 19:36
  Speaker 4: my family. So you know, it's it's important to spread
• 19:40
  Speaker 4: information and to teach your kids, even though it may
• 19:42
  Speaker 4: be a little scary, but you do have to do
• 19:44
  Speaker 4: it in a way where it doesn't incite fear.
• 19:46
  Speaker 7: How do y'all go ahead, How y'all pick and choose?
• 19:49
  Speaker 6: What do y'all like, what y'all decide to be transparent about,
• 19:51
  Speaker 6: because there's so much, Like you have stuff that you
• 19:54
  Speaker 6: have to protect them from just because they're going to
• 19:55
  Speaker 6: school and you guys, people know you. But then you
• 19:57
  Speaker 6: also have stuff that's just happening in the world that
• 19:59
  Speaker 6: they could encounter with their friends. Like it's just so much.
• 20:02
  Speaker 6: Your kids are getting older, and they're like, you know,
• 20:03
  Speaker 6: like they they're wanting to walk by themselves with their friends.
• 20:06
  Speaker 6: If it was.
• 20:07
  Speaker 1: Up to me, I'm transparent with everything. Right has to
• 20:09
  Speaker 1: hold back a lot. And the reason I think I'm streaming, well,
• 20:12
  Speaker 1: the reason.
• 20:13
  Speaker 9: I'm so transparent I'll explain. But the reason I'm so transparent.
• 20:17
  Speaker 7: What you mean?
• 20:25
  Speaker 9: But you know so so some things get you know,
• 20:28
  Speaker 9: like for instance, like with Logan, Right, Logan when he
• 20:32
  Speaker 9: was in high school used to get picked on all
• 20:33
  Speaker 9: the time.
• 20:34
  Speaker 1: Right, But he used to get picked on. Guess for
• 20:36
  Speaker 1: what reason? No, because because Charlemagne, yes, yes, so.
• 20:43
  Speaker 3: When you gave me the ask, that's why.
• 20:50
  Speaker 1: He gave me the buck cake when he gave me
• 20:53
  Speaker 1: not much better. You know what I mean.
• 21:01
  Speaker 5: I'm not about to hate.
• 21:04
  Speaker 1: He used to get made fun of it because of that.
• 21:06
  Speaker 9: So, but the reason I'm so transparent is there's so
• 21:08
  Speaker 9: many families and people dealing with the same things but
• 21:11
  Speaker 9: never want to talk about it. Scared to So that's
• 21:14
  Speaker 9: why I talked about the orgasm thing in the first book.
• 21:16
  Speaker 9: That's why in this in the second. But we talk
• 21:18
  Speaker 9: about you know the time that from the.
• 21:24
  Speaker 1: No, no, not every.
• 21:28
  Speaker 2: Every you want to do some.
• 21:33
  Speaker 9: Even like in this book, we talk about the time
• 21:35
  Speaker 9: that that uh, Logan found a bloody condom at one
• 21:40
  Speaker 9: of his friend's house, so he can't, but he's he's
• 21:44
  Speaker 9: comfortable while you're looking at that it wasn't mine.
• 21:49
  Speaker 4: He's like, oh, he found right friend's house and and
• 21:58
  Speaker 4: he was like maybe nine years old, nine years old.
• 22:02
  Speaker 4: He was about nine years old.
• 22:03
  Speaker 5: But he was comfortable enough to keep in the basement.
• 22:06
  Speaker 4: And the little boy had an older brother.
• 22:09
  Speaker 1: Yeah, when char.
• 22:10
  Speaker 9: Gave so she had that's when we had the sex
• 22:18
  Speaker 9: talk and had to have the sex talk with Logan
• 22:21
  Speaker 9: and Madison.
• 22:22
  Speaker 3: What kind of sex talk though it wasn't a backdoor
• 22:25
  Speaker 3: sex talk that they just birds and bees and.
• 22:32
  Speaker 4: They got a full blown, okay sex talk. They had
• 22:36
  Speaker 4: to understand because if you leave it back.
• 22:39
  Speaker 2: Doing sex, That's what I'm really trying to figure out.
• 22:42
  Speaker 2: Why was the condon bloody? I'm really when somebody ran red, Like.
• 22:46
  Speaker 8: Yeah, somebody just ripped somebody butt open, somebody ran a red.
• 22:54
  Speaker 7: Don't be like the first time thing.
• 22:56
  Speaker 4: Yeah, yeah, but no, they at that point I found
• 22:59
  Speaker 4: that they were all enough and mature enough, and you're
• 23:02
  Speaker 4: they're encountering things. Now, these conversations are being had amongst
• 23:05
  Speaker 4: their peers. And I knew that if I didn't set
• 23:08
  Speaker 4: them straight, that they were going to be absorbing all
• 23:11
  Speaker 4: of this wrong information and wrong ideas. So I told
• 23:16
  Speaker 4: them sex feels good. It's a pleasureful experience. God made
• 23:23
  Speaker 4: us that way because God wants us to reproduce. He
• 23:27
  Speaker 4: wants us to create offspring. So he made it something
• 23:30
  Speaker 4: that we would enjoy. But it's meant for someone that
• 23:33
  Speaker 4: you love, and that's the reason why. So they're like, oh, okay,
• 23:37
  Speaker 4: so what is it like and what did you say? Okay,
• 23:42
  Speaker 4: if I'm being honest, I told them that there is
• 23:45
  Speaker 4: a penis, and there is a vagina and it does
• 23:48
  Speaker 4: slide in and out. And my son Logan was like,
• 23:51
  Speaker 4: so like this, yeah, they're bad. Yes, they're eleven about
• 24:02
  Speaker 4: they're about eleven and nine him that I'll never forget
• 24:07
  Speaker 4: since you asked. He was like, so is it like
• 24:08
  Speaker 4: like I was like, yeah, something like that. I said,
• 24:17
  Speaker 4: you know, some people look at it as a negative thing. No, no, no,
• 24:21
  Speaker 4: he really didn't know. He really didn't. He really didn't
• 24:25
  Speaker 4: even even like my eleven year old son right now,
• 24:28
  Speaker 4: he does not know. He asked me three days ago,
• 24:31
  Speaker 4: like what does sexual mean, I said, it's not for you.
• 24:34
  Speaker 4: It's not for you to understand right now. So when
• 24:36
  Speaker 4: they asked me questions that I don't want them to
• 24:39
  Speaker 4: know about. And he's older than Logan was, But now
• 24:43
  Speaker 4: with I have a better grip on his friends and
• 24:46
  Speaker 4: a grip on what he's exposed to on his phone
• 24:48
  Speaker 4: and whatnot in Parameter's boundaries, So I'm really abreast of
• 24:52
  Speaker 4: what he knows and what he doesn't in our lines
• 24:56
  Speaker 4: of communication are way way better. Like he like those kids.
• 25:01
  Speaker 4: They come to me every day and when they get
• 25:03
  Speaker 4: home from school, either for a half an hour an hour,
• 25:06
  Speaker 4: depending on what activity they have. Afterwards, they have their turns.
• 25:09
  Speaker 4: They sit at the foot of my bed, they lay
• 25:11
  Speaker 4: down or they sit down and they tell me about
• 25:13
  Speaker 4: their entire day. They tell me the best part of
• 25:15
  Speaker 4: their day, the worst part of their day, and one
• 25:17
  Speaker 4: kind thing that they did for someone else that day.
• 25:19
  Speaker 4: So that's just our routine, that's our ritual. And they
• 25:22
  Speaker 4: tell me everything, and you would be shocked and appalled
• 25:26
  Speaker 4: to know the things that they divulge. But it's because
• 25:29
  Speaker 4: we create that safe space, We create that soft place
• 25:33
  Speaker 4: to land, We create a no judgment zone and you
• 25:36
  Speaker 4: could tell me anything. It could be the world's worst.
• 25:39
  Speaker 4: I will never ever judge you. I will help you
• 25:42
  Speaker 4: fix it. We'll extract all the lessons, everything that you
• 25:45
  Speaker 4: need to learn from it, whether you were wrong, whether
• 25:47
  Speaker 4: you weren't whatever. It is like, this is your safe
• 25:51
  Speaker 4: space and they have that foundation. So they share, they share,
• 25:56
  Speaker 4: and we take that time like we share.
• 25:58
  Speaker 8: Yeah, you have six Kames, So was there anything because
• 26:01
  Speaker 8: y'all have all age groups, So is there anything that
• 26:05
  Speaker 8: you felt like in the beginning, y'all didn't know until
• 26:09
  Speaker 8: y'all got to that six kid of course, Like what
• 26:13
  Speaker 8: were some of the I'll give you an example.
• 26:15
  Speaker 5: You didn't know? You just was like, well we may
• 26:17
  Speaker 5: and Rashan winging.
• 26:17
  Speaker 4: This, I'll give you. I'll give you an example. But
• 26:20
  Speaker 4: to speak to what you said, like we wrote a book,
• 26:23
  Speaker 4: that doesn't mean that we know everything, and it doesn't
• 26:26
  Speaker 4: mean that it's not an evolution. It doesn't mean that
• 26:29
  Speaker 4: we're still learning every single day. Like I said earlier,
• 26:32
  Speaker 4: it's a sense of community where we share our experiences
• 26:35
  Speaker 4: and the wins and the losses so that other people
• 26:39
  Speaker 4: can understand they're not alone. And it comes in all shades,
• 26:43
  Speaker 4: all forms, all fashions, all financial groups, we all speak
• 26:49
  Speaker 4: a universal universal language as parents. With Logan, so one
• 26:55
  Speaker 4: of one of the fails, and this was something that
• 26:57
  Speaker 4: we disagreed on. So it was the explaining everything to
• 27:02
  Speaker 4: the kids. I have the patience to do it. And
• 27:04
  Speaker 4: he really is a because I said so type of guy.
• 27:08
  Speaker 4: And it worked beautifully with Madison, but with Logan from
• 27:12
  Speaker 4: a young age, I would explain everything to him and
• 27:15
  Speaker 4: he's a MoMA's boy.
• 27:16
  Speaker 1: Time's thirty and he tells.
• 27:18
  Speaker 4: Us it is that boy, Like we have a thing,
• 27:23
  Speaker 4: you know, and I have a different thing with all
• 27:25
  Speaker 4: of my kids, but me and him have our thing.
• 27:28
  Speaker 4: Like he calls me at all times of the day,
• 27:31
  Speaker 4: all time. He will call me at three o'clock in
• 27:32
  Speaker 4: the morning, like at twelve o'clock in the afternoon, and
• 27:34
  Speaker 4: she's like, yeah, what's up, mom, what's going on? You're good? Yeah,
• 27:37
  Speaker 4: I'm good. I was just at the club home. I'm
• 27:39
  Speaker 4: about to FaceTime you, Lucas and Andrew. Here, take a look,
• 27:42
  Speaker 4: take a look, and I'm like, what's up? Sleep is up?
• 27:45
  Speaker 4: But okay, you know what I mean. Like we're very
• 27:47
  Speaker 4: very close. But it kind of went wrong with him
• 27:51
  Speaker 4: because what we found was that we created an environment
• 27:55
  Speaker 4: where he felt that he was entitled to an explanation,
• 27:59
  Speaker 4: and he felt as though because we gave him too
• 28:04
  Speaker 4: safe of a space that he could challenge me. And
• 28:08
  Speaker 4: he can challenge a decision that I made. And he's
• 28:12
  Speaker 4: very and he's very intelligent. He's very, very intelligent. So
• 28:20
  Speaker 4: Rashwan always says that I'm like a lawyer, right, he
• 28:22
  Speaker 4: says it all the time. I know what it feels
• 28:25
  Speaker 4: like because I have a logan and logan lawyers me,
• 28:28
  Speaker 4: do you know what I mean?
• 28:28
  Speaker 1: So they do it each other all day long, Yes,
• 28:31
  Speaker 1: all day.
• 28:31
  Speaker 4: Long, and in a lot of ways, I enjoy it
• 28:34
  Speaker 4: because I feel like he really does challenge me, and
• 28:37
  Speaker 4: he's one of the only people that I feel like
• 28:39
  Speaker 4: does that in my life. And I love to see
• 28:42
  Speaker 4: the mental exercise. I love to see how his brain
• 28:44
  Speaker 4: is moving and how he's getting around the things that
• 28:46
  Speaker 4: I'm saying and things like that. So it's good at
• 28:49
  Speaker 4: his adult age now because he's twenty one, But when
• 28:51
  Speaker 4: he was a child, it wasn't acceptable because I'm going
• 28:54
  Speaker 4: to explain because this is what I do. But now
• 28:57
  Speaker 4: you're not understanding that that's a grace that I show you.
• 29:02
  Speaker 4: It's not something that you're entitled to. This is a
• 29:05
  Speaker 4: courtesy that I'm extending to you, but you're not entitled.
• 29:09
  Speaker 4: So we had to dial that back to boundaries. And
• 29:14
  Speaker 4: then we had to teach boundaries and let him know
• 29:17
  Speaker 4: his place because he started to misunderstand his place. So
• 29:23
  Speaker 4: that was that was a fail in a sense. And
• 29:28
  Speaker 4: Rashalmoud always look at me like see I told you,
• 29:30
  Speaker 4: Like see I told you because.
• 29:32
  Speaker 1: He's a bad guy.
• 29:32
  Speaker 9: Because now I got to go discipline that, right, So
• 29:35
  Speaker 9: now me and Logan get into it.
• 29:36
  Speaker 2: And now you can't beat Logan because Logan.
• 29:41
  Speaker 9: So now I got a discipline Logan, and then me
• 29:42
  Speaker 9: and Logan get into it. But one thing about Logan
• 29:44
  Speaker 9: and all of our kids, which is the craziest thing,
• 29:46
  Speaker 9: is they're very forgiven. Like with Logan, I have to
• 29:50
  Speaker 9: get sometimes so disrespectful for him to understand. And the
• 29:53
  Speaker 9: next day he's like, hey Dad, what's up. And I'm like,
• 29:54
  Speaker 9: hey Dad, what's up. But that's how he is, and
• 29:56
  Speaker 9: he just has conversations. But we have those conversations and
• 29:59
  Speaker 9: we understand and we talk. But he's the one that
• 30:02
  Speaker 9: just like his mom.
• 30:03
  Speaker 7: Did you fail like a failure?
• 30:05
  Speaker 4: No? No, I didn't feel like a failure, but I
• 30:07
  Speaker 4: knew that that technique wasn't wasn't necessarily fail, but it
• 30:12
  Speaker 4: needed tweaking. So then we had our other four and
• 30:16
  Speaker 4: there was a huge gap. There's about nine years between
• 30:18
  Speaker 4: Logan and London. So I wanted to maintain what I
• 30:23
  Speaker 4: always believed in and how I was raised, but I
• 30:26
  Speaker 4: wanted to implement some of because I told you so
• 30:29
  Speaker 4: as well, Like I am going to explain to you,
• 30:31
  Speaker 4: but I'm going to let you know that it is
• 30:33
  Speaker 4: because I'm showing you grace and it's because I respect you,
• 30:36
  Speaker 4: So in turn, you have to respect me, and you
• 30:38
  Speaker 4: have to respect the decision and we can talk about
• 30:40
  Speaker 4: it as long as it's coming from a good place.
• 30:42
  Speaker 4: And I'm not sensing any attitude from you, any entitlement
• 30:45
  Speaker 4: from you, or anything that I don't like to feel
• 30:48
  Speaker 4: as we sit here and discuss it. So you got
• 30:50
  Speaker 4: to make sure you keep it right. And my kids
• 30:53
  Speaker 4: get it. So this pack of three, because Peyton's three
• 30:57
  Speaker 4: years old, but my eleven, my ten, and my eight,
• 31:00
  Speaker 4: they get it. Like I tell them, if they were
• 31:03
  Speaker 4: really curious, they might question, and then after I say
• 31:06
  Speaker 4: it again, they're like okay, absolutely, whatever it is. And
• 31:09
  Speaker 4: so it's it's through that trial and error with Madison
• 31:13
  Speaker 4: and Logan that were able to take all the good stuff,
• 31:16
  Speaker 4: you know, all the good stuff and pour it into
• 31:18
  Speaker 4: this second batch of kids.
• 31:21
  Speaker 7: No, go ahead, I thought, I'm asking so much.
• 31:23
  Speaker 5: So no, it's okay.
• 31:26
  Speaker 8: So in the beginning, So going back to something you
• 31:39
  Speaker 8: said earlier, you were saying that the past two years
• 31:41
  Speaker 8: was very traumatic and not getting into that. How challenging
• 31:46
  Speaker 8: was it writing this book? Like was it ever moments
• 31:49
  Speaker 8: where you uh amersha or just you like broke down,
• 31:52
  Speaker 8: like not like giving up, but it was challenging for
• 31:56
  Speaker 8: you to get deep into any you know, any of
• 31:58
  Speaker 8: the chapters or what you win through within the pastry year.
• 32:01
  Speaker 4: You know what, I'll be honest with you, no pun intended,
• 32:06
  Speaker 4: but I'm an open book. I'm not a private person.
• 32:10
  Speaker 4: I've never been a very private person. And it's because
• 32:13
  Speaker 4: i feel as though the value in life is truth.
• 32:18
  Speaker 4: You know, even if it's not pretty. You know, there's
• 32:21
  Speaker 4: no value to anything if it's not honest, if it's
• 32:23
  Speaker 4: not true, if it's not transparent, if it's bs, it's worthless.
• 32:28
  Speaker 4: You know, if you wrap everything in a pretty bow.
• 32:30
  Speaker 4: It's worthless because who can relate to you? Nobody. I
• 32:33
  Speaker 4: can't relate to people that appear to be perfect or
• 32:36
  Speaker 4: pretend to be perfect, because I don't know you. I
• 32:39
  Speaker 4: don't know anybody like you, you know what I mean. So
• 32:42
  Speaker 4: anytime that I'm honest or I'm vulnerable about something, to me,
• 32:47
  Speaker 4: it's like giving a little gift from myself. It's sharing
• 32:50
  Speaker 4: something that I know other people wouldn't share because they'd
• 32:53
  Speaker 4: be too embarrassed or it disrupts the image that they're
• 32:57
  Speaker 4: trying to present, so that I don't respect. So it's
• 33:01
  Speaker 4: very easy for me to tell my truth from where
• 33:04
  Speaker 4: I genuinely come from.
• 33:06
  Speaker 2: You did you'll have a family mission statement?
• 33:09
  Speaker 7: Yes?
• 33:10
  Speaker 2: What is the mission statement? And tell people the importance of.
• 33:12
  Speaker 9: That well, just so we know, we don't have it
• 33:14
  Speaker 9: on our wall and then make the kids read it
• 33:15
  Speaker 9: when they walk in the house.
• 33:16
  Speaker 1: It's not like that.
• 33:19
  Speaker 9: So our mission statement is just something that we, you know,
• 33:22
  Speaker 9: as a family, we all live by, right, And I'll
• 33:24
  Speaker 9: read some of them. And the reason is is we
• 33:26
  Speaker 9: are a close unit, right, So if you see us together,
• 33:29
  Speaker 9: we're all.
• 33:29
  Speaker 1: Always out together.
• 33:30
  Speaker 9: You see me the other day with Jackson, you've seen
• 33:33
  Speaker 9: me before and Charlamage seen before.
• 33:34
  Speaker 1: So the mission statement is we are a unit. Right,
• 33:36
  Speaker 1: we all ride together like we are really a unit,
• 33:38
  Speaker 1: a unit.
• 33:39
  Speaker 9: I'm an only child, so I'm I'm heavy into taking
• 33:43
  Speaker 9: care of each other.
• 33:44
  Speaker 1: Right.
• 33:45
  Speaker 9: We respect each other, of course, it's simple, like we
• 33:48
  Speaker 9: make sure that, you know, we respect each other's feeling.
• 33:50
  Speaker 1: We always have each other's backs.
• 33:51
  Speaker 9: That's one thing that we always do, and it's you know,
• 33:54
  Speaker 9: sometimes when we have conversations up here, I always talk
• 33:55
  Speaker 9: about my kids. So when they see stuff on social media,
• 33:58
  Speaker 9: at times I have to stop them because they will
• 34:00
  Speaker 9: go in, especially.
• 34:01
  Speaker 1: Logan Logan, Oh yeah, we always.
• 34:05
  Speaker 9: Loved uplift each other and pointing out the good in
• 34:07
  Speaker 9: one another. Right, So we see that more, especially with
• 34:10
  Speaker 9: our girls in dance because they compete against each other
• 34:12
  Speaker 9: a lot. So when they do, we have to make
• 34:13
  Speaker 9: sure that regardless of what happens. Like a couple of
• 34:16
  Speaker 9: weeks ago, London lost and we thought London got jerked.
• 34:19
  Speaker 9: So I told you know, I had a conversation with Brooklyn,
• 34:22
  Speaker 9: and Brooklyn was like that, don't worry, I'm gonna get
• 34:23
  Speaker 9: first and second four And she went out there and
• 34:25
  Speaker 9: bust ask that first and.
• 34:26
  Speaker 4: Second he got first place and second.
• 34:28
  Speaker 9: Again you know, gave the first place to her sister.
• 34:30
  Speaker 9: Because that's what it was. We represent each other at
• 34:32
  Speaker 9: all times. That's how it always is. So we always
• 34:35
  Speaker 9: tell our kids if we're not there, you make sure
• 34:37
  Speaker 9: that those parents come back and say, oh my gosh,
• 34:39
  Speaker 9: she was such a pleasure.
• 34:40
  Speaker 1: He was polite, he was this even with Jackson at
• 34:43
  Speaker 1: the game.
• 34:44
  Speaker 9: You know, Jackson said thank you a million one time,
• 34:46
  Speaker 9: so you said hello million one time.
• 34:48
  Speaker 1: To you, because that's what he's taught to do, that you.
• 34:50
  Speaker 4: Show respect one second before you go on with that.
• 34:55
  Speaker 4: My goal for my kids is that when they leave
• 34:58
  Speaker 4: our house, I want everyone that they come in contact
• 35:01
  Speaker 4: with to know that they're well loved. Do you know
• 35:04
  Speaker 4: what I mean? Like, I want them to know that
• 35:06
  Speaker 4: they're well loved. What we teach you inside this house,
• 35:09
  Speaker 4: you exemplify outside of this house. And it's so interesting
• 35:14
  Speaker 4: because you know, as parents, we have a goal, you know,
• 35:16
  Speaker 4: and these are goals that we vocalize to one another.
• 35:20
  Speaker 4: So when we get calls from other parents when our
• 35:24
  Speaker 4: kids are on a playdate, teachers principles. Both sets of
• 35:29
  Speaker 4: kids went to a new school and we got calls
• 35:32
  Speaker 4: from like the parent, the teachers, like what are you
• 35:35
  Speaker 4: guys doing in that house? What are you doing with
• 35:38
  Speaker 4: these kids? Like I've never seen this before, and all
• 35:41
  Speaker 4: three of them are like this. It lets you know
• 35:44
  Speaker 4: that you're doing something right, you're doing something meaningful. Those
• 35:48
  Speaker 4: teachers know that they're well loved, and of course other
• 35:54
  Speaker 4: children are well loved. It's not that, but it's coming
• 35:57
  Speaker 4: from a mental space that you understand. And like what
• 36:01
  Speaker 4: we talked about earlier about articulating words and things, when
• 36:05
  Speaker 4: you articulate something to a child and you do it
• 36:08
  Speaker 4: in a way where they understand what it means and
• 36:11
  Speaker 4: what their actions mean. Because you can love your child
• 36:14
  Speaker 4: to death, you could take a bullet for them.
• 36:16
  Speaker 7: You do.
• 36:16
  Speaker 4: You work hard, you hustle, you do everything for your kids.
• 36:19
  Speaker 4: You love your kids, but they could still go out
• 36:21
  Speaker 4: and be a menace because the lessons may be lost.
• 36:25
  Speaker 4: And these are things that a lot of parents don't
• 36:27
  Speaker 4: put into perspective when raising children because what do we
• 36:30
  Speaker 4: usually do. We take it. We take, like, you know,
• 36:33
  Speaker 4: an idea, and we throw it up against the wall
• 36:35
  Speaker 4: and we see if it sticks or not.
• 36:36
  Speaker 7: You know what I mean?
• 36:37
  Speaker 4: Oh that worked, Oh that didn't okay, But a lot
• 36:41
  Speaker 4: of people don't have something tangible that they can go
• 36:44
  Speaker 4: back to and be like, this is this is this
• 36:48
  Speaker 4: is a way to create a foundation, This is a
• 36:50
  Speaker 4: way to create a structure. And because we had so
• 36:53
  Speaker 4: many ups and downs, we were able to do that
• 36:56
  Speaker 4: and put it in one place.
• 36:58
  Speaker 1: And I think the biggest story now hate want to
• 37:00
  Speaker 1: tell a story was Jackson.
• 37:01
  Speaker 4: Right.
• 37:01
  Speaker 9: So we had a parent teacher's night a couple of
• 37:03
  Speaker 9: weeks ago and a teacher came up to me.
• 37:06
  Speaker 1: The teacher that I had no idea you know who?
• 37:08
  Speaker 9: He was a step night r. So he walks up
• 37:11
  Speaker 9: to me. He was like, are you Jackson's dad? And
• 37:12
  Speaker 9: I'm like yeah.
• 37:13
  Speaker 1: When a teacher usually asked, that's usually some bs.
• 37:15
  Speaker 2: Right.
• 37:15
  Speaker 9: So I'm like, oh, hey, we go what did Jackson do?
• 37:17
  Speaker 9: And he was like, I just want to tell you.
• 37:19
  Speaker 9: You know, Jackson did something that no child or adult
• 37:22
  Speaker 9: has done in my life.
• 37:23
  Speaker 1: I'm like, well, what's that?
• 37:25
  Speaker 9: And he was like the other day, I'm walking down
• 37:26
  Speaker 9: the hall and Jackson comes running up to me and
• 37:28
  Speaker 9: he goes, you know, are you okay?
• 37:30
  Speaker 1: And the teacher was like, what do you mean? He
• 37:31
  Speaker 1: was like, you just don't look as happy as usually
• 37:33
  Speaker 1: do or you are right? Is anything bothering you? Would
• 37:35
  Speaker 1: you like to have a conversation with me and just
• 37:37
  Speaker 1: talk it through.
• 37:42
  Speaker 9: I was like, naw, you just don't seem as happy
• 37:44
  Speaker 9: as you do, but don't let things stress you out.
• 37:46
  Speaker 1: Just pray on it and tomorrow be better, right, and
• 37:48
  Speaker 1: if you need to talk to me, come talk to me.
• 37:50
  Speaker 9: And he said Jackson ran off and he was like,
• 37:52
  Speaker 9: I've never had an adult or a child ever do
• 37:54
  Speaker 9: that to me. So he was like, whatever you're doing
• 37:55
  Speaker 9: at home, continue that, and you know what I mean,
• 37:58
  Speaker 9: that just shows what the kids are learned at home
• 38:00
  Speaker 9: is worth every Yeah, so.
• 38:01
  Speaker 2: You need to report that teacher too. He don't need
• 38:03
  Speaker 2: to be in school.
• 38:09
  Speaker 5: Was like, you got some time. So he was the
• 38:16
  Speaker 5: only person, I mean, London was the only person that
• 38:18
  Speaker 5: saw him at.
• 38:21
  Speaker 7: Jackson.
• 38:28
  Speaker 4: So that was stem night. But at the parent teacher conference,
• 38:32
  Speaker 4: one of the teachers said that if she could use
• 38:35
  Speaker 4: one word to describe Jackson, it would be grateful. And
• 38:40
  Speaker 4: she said, in thirty years of teaching, I've never used
• 38:42
  Speaker 4: that word with a child before. I said, well, what
• 38:45
  Speaker 4: do you mean by grateful? He says? She said, every day,
• 38:48
  Speaker 4: after every lesson. He comes up to me and says,
• 38:50
  Speaker 4: thank you for teaching me today. And I said really,
• 38:54
  Speaker 4: And he said, she said where, Like where did like
• 38:57
  Speaker 4: where does he get that from? Like what's what's like?
• 38:59
  Speaker 4: You know? I said, that's his own interpretation. But when
• 39:03
  Speaker 4: he plays sports, after every game, I tell him to
• 39:06
  Speaker 4: shake the referee hand and to look him in this
• 39:09
  Speaker 4: look him in the eye, a nice strong handshake and
• 39:11
  Speaker 4: say thank you. And do the same thing with your coach,
• 39:14
  Speaker 4: because these are people that give their time, that don't
• 39:16
  Speaker 4: have to give their time, and it's for you and
• 39:18
  Speaker 4: for your benefit and your learning and your greatness. So
• 39:21
  Speaker 4: you acknowledge that man or that woman and you say
• 39:24
  Speaker 4: thank you. So I think that that's his interpretation how
• 39:27
  Speaker 4: he's doing it in another way, you know what I mean.
• 39:30
  Speaker 5: Are such a beautiful family.
• 39:32
  Speaker 4: Thank you?
• 39:33
  Speaker 5: And this man will crashed out for any of y'all.
• 39:36
  Speaker 5: I know.
• 39:40
  Speaker 1: Behind the scenes a bunch of times.
• 39:41
  Speaker 9: And Jessica was like, yo, you crash out for you.
• 39:45
  Speaker 5: No man, tell excuse me, shut up anyway, when is
• 39:52
  Speaker 5: baby number seven? Come?
• 39:54
  Speaker 4: The shop is closed? This ship has.
• 39:57
  Speaker 1: Said the shop is not closed.
• 39:59
  Speaker 10: Okay, no, no, there's no stip snip. But I know
• 40:04
  Speaker 10: how not to get pregnant. No, no, I don't want
• 40:09
  Speaker 10: them to get.
• 40:11
  Speaker 7: That's the case you ever wanted.
• 40:13
  Speaker 4: No, I just don't think it's necessary. I know how
• 40:15
  Speaker 4: not to get pregnant yet the husband.
• 40:23
  Speaker 2: I'm sorry say that again for the wives who want
• 40:24
  Speaker 2: their husbands.
• 40:26
  Speaker 4: I don't know. Other other women may have gotten pregnant
• 40:30
  Speaker 4: unintentionally and have a different view, But me personally, I
• 40:35
  Speaker 4: just you know, like people have asked me, like, do
• 40:37
  Speaker 4: you want to get your tubes tied? I just like
• 40:39
  Speaker 4: our natural bodies and I like them to function the
• 40:41
  Speaker 4: way that they function. And if I can take a
• 40:44
  Speaker 4: human precaution to prevent a particular result, and I'll do that,
• 40:48
  Speaker 4: I don't. I don't think that it's for me. It's
• 40:50
  Speaker 4: not necessary. I absolutely understand why people do both of
• 40:53
  Speaker 4: those procedures, but for me, I just don't find it
• 40:54
  Speaker 4: to be necessary. That's all, you know.
• 41:02
  Speaker 3: April fifteen for it to be out in bookstores everywhere
• 41:04
  Speaker 3: everywhere you buy books, man Gid, thank you for pulling up.
• 41:07
  Speaker 7: Thank you so much.
• 41:08
  Speaker 4: You can pre order on Amazon right now.
• 41:10
  Speaker 9: And for everybody else. We just want to add this
• 41:12
  Speaker 9: last part. We actually wrote it with somebody that helped
• 41:14
  Speaker 9: us out that we'll.
• 41:15
  Speaker 1: Talk about that. That that helped us.
• 41:17
  Speaker 9: With terms and helped us with different phrases, and helped
• 41:19
  Speaker 9: us with made sure that we were actually doing the
• 41:21
  Speaker 9: right thing when it came to raising our kids.
• 41:23
  Speaker 4: Yeah, so we wrote it alongside a psychologist because yes,
• 41:28
  Speaker 4: because we wanted to make sure that our outlooks were
• 41:35
  Speaker 4: were on the level that I would want to put
• 41:38
  Speaker 4: it out to the public. I wanted the psychological research
• 41:43
  Speaker 4: and quarterbacking behind the way that we parent to pretty
• 41:47
  Speaker 4: much put a stamp on it, to know that what
• 41:50
  Speaker 4: we're doing not just from our personal experience driven point
• 41:53
  Speaker 4: of view is sound, but from a psychological point of
• 41:56
  Speaker 4: view is also sound. I wanted to make sure that
• 41:59
  Speaker 4: alongside the true truth and the transparency and the experience
• 42:02
  Speaker 4: that we had that backing to the book as well.
• 42:05
  Speaker 4: I wanted that level of value in the book as well.
• 42:08
  Speaker 4: So and also, you know, if you have a child
• 42:11
  Speaker 4: with anxiety, add ADHD, other setbacks, other disabilities, you know
• 42:16
  Speaker 4: we speak to you in this book as well, because
• 42:18
  Speaker 4: those people are very like they don't have that many resources.
• 42:22
  Speaker 4: This book is for anyone who is a parent, a
• 42:25
  Speaker 4: single parent, a parent that is.
• 42:27
  Speaker 1: Married, maybe about to have kids.
• 42:30
  Speaker 4: Someone that wants to have a child, You.
• 42:36
  Speaker 7: Look over, thank you, It's It's, It's, It's forever.
• 42:39
  Speaker 4: It's a very relatable book, and there's a lot of
• 42:41
  Speaker 4: exercises in the book. We kind of also created it
• 42:44
  Speaker 4: in like a workbook style, so there's a lot of reflections.
• 42:47
  Speaker 4: There's a lot of places in there for you to
• 42:49
  Speaker 4: answer questions so you can kind of analyze yourself and
• 42:52
  Speaker 4: understand your own point of view in a way of
• 42:54
  Speaker 4: like articulation, where if you haven't really thought about certain things,
• 42:57
  Speaker 4: it'll jog you to think about things. And even if
• 43:00
  Speaker 4: you don't do don't take our take, it encourages you
• 43:03
  Speaker 4: and helps you to come up with your own takes
• 43:05
  Speaker 4: on parenting.
• 43:06
  Speaker 1: So you have April fifteenth, guys, pre order it now.
• 43:09
  Speaker 4: Pre order it now.
• 43:10
  Speaker 2: My Real Family. The Casey Crew is the Breakfast Club,
• 43:14
  Speaker 2: Wake that.
• 43:14
  Speaker 1: Ass up in the morning.
• 43:16
  Speaker 2: Breakfast Club