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That Gen X Friend LARPing as an Angel Does Not an Angel Make” · Military Broadcast Radio | MBR Talk

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grew up on static and midnight shows.
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MTV raised us. You already know latchkey hearts
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and wild eyed dreams, their own mind staring at the scene but
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you say it's too much to unpack. But I'll see you wait and I've
0:47
got your back. Talk
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at the world. No one replied, but we didn't.
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Good morning welcome or welcome back to that Gen.
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X from podcast. Before I begin, as usual, I want
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to give a shout out to MB radio. Thanks H for getting this all
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started and continue to grow it, grow this platform for veterans
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to share the voices, their perspectives.
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So let's get to it. I think I'm going to stick to
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this transition. That's the only way I believe is
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working. So today I wanted to talk about
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LAR Ping. And for those who may not know
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what LAR Ping stands for, that's live action role-playing.
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It is becoming, it's it became more popular.
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I'm not sure how popular it is still is, but the current usage
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for it for movies like live action.
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So they take a cartoon that was already, you know, that was
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popular, like Little Mermaid or what is the one that's Hawaii.
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Oh my goodness, there was another one.
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I was recently made. They're they're actually
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remaking a lot of like the live action version of this, right.
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But I, I want to take it into a different direction because as
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Shakespeare said, all of life is the stage.
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So in a way we are, we come into this world and whoever we are
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and we kind of role play, right? That's we put ourselves out
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there by the way we look, by the way we sound, how we choose to
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what we do. It's all sort of role-playing,
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but not we're not choosing like, oh, today I'm going to be, well,
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some people are now choosing different things to be.
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However, historically speaking, Shakespeare meant it that we
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came to play a role in our lives.
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I want you to imagine this in the description.
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I believe most of us have had this interaction sort of
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encounter either by chance or by circumstance that was deliberate
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or by fate. You, you have this encounter
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with this individual and wow, you come away from this
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encounter and you're blown away by their persona, right?
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They were well quaffed. Doesn't matter gender from head
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to toe. They just looked is this real?
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You know, they they were walk qua from head to toe.
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All the looks they made your heart go pitter patter and they
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wore I think, forgive me if I'm using this incorrectly.
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Call it drip, right? They're dripping because the
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clothes they're wearing, they're dripping with all the trending
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coveted brand names. I guess Louis Vuitton, you know,
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whatever, whatever is popular right now because personally, I
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like to shop things on clearance at TD Maxx people, I digress.
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And on top of that, during this encounter, they have, whether
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deliberately or, you know, situation appropriate, shared
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the suffixes after their name. It could, it could be MDPHDJD,
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whatever else comes, especially in, let's say, the tech arena,
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you can have all these just long, long abbreviations of
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achievements after the name. He's just like mind equals
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blown, blown away, dizzied. You know, once we're like that,
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it's dizzying and we become starry eyed and post encounter.
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We we can't help it. That's you know, we do that.
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Whether you, you think this is a potential mate or this is a
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potential person you can collaborate with, hire or
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somebody, a mentor, whatever you can name it.
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And you're imagine you're going, you've fallen down the rabbit
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hole like Alice in Wonderland and your imagination's going wow
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of what the future may bring with this individual.
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And you've, if you imagine all the things just from that one
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encounter, right? And almost assigned this
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qualifier of how qualified they are for all kinds of things
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because they I'm not saying the initials after the suffixes
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after name does not qualify them for whatever they obviously some
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people have gone forth and put forth effort to earn the
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credentials, right, All the things they can list after the
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name. But beyond all the all the
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things I just lifted off, I listed off Beyond that, there's
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like almost subconscious thing that we assigned to them to be
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qualified for all things, all kinds of things.
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We carry it over. So here I give you the next
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situation. When I was younger and this is a
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real story, I think it was really the first time I was
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introduced to Halloween and like really I'm an immigrant, so like
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to dress up. OK.
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So I think the first time I really had a costume, I I was an
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Angel. I had the little, the glitter, I
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guess they're tinsels like wrapped around this Halo looking
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thing that was attached to the whatever I was wearing, the
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white robe that I was wearing. Yeah, I, I was in today's terms,
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I was Larping as an Angel. But Angel, it did not make me.
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I was not an Angel and nor did I have the capabilities.
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Oh, yeah. I even had the little wand.
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I think it was a star wand. You know, you can, I guess,
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bestow whatever the gifts an Angel would and could if I was
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actually an Angel, but I was not.
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I was just merely Larping. I bring up these two situations.
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This, this latter 1 is a kid dressing up as an Angel.
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Well, of course, nobody, nobody believes it, right?
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It, it's for Halloween, people dress up with all kinds of
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things, whatever, but in life. So that's why I bring up these
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two situations. It's just supposing like in real
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life, no, I didn't put much effort.
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Actually somebody else made the, it was the last minute like I,
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we didn't have costumes. So that that was really easy.
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But the first individual I asked you to imagine potentially went
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forth, well, not potentially, obviously to look a certain way,
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to dress a certain way. There's a level of effortness or
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yeah, effort that goes into just playing that image well, whether
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it is them for real or not, right?
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And man doesn't impress. I'm not saying so I want to make
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it clear that to look a certain way to be that individual that
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just overwhelms your senses. You're just like blown away.
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You're you're filled with admiration or infatuation.
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I'm not saying these individuals are working.
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They they could this really could be them, right?
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Or maybe could not. For those people, those of us
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are those of us out here who are paying attention to the news
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recently, You, you can look this up is literally going on right
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now. It is all over the news.
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Cambridge, the youngest full professor at Cambridge ended up
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being a scandal. You you can look it up 'cause it
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has a lot to do with other things, but LAR ping I would say
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is appropriate. This LAR ping, however, when you
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LARP, regardless how you looked, eventually the LAR ping sort of
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falls apart and you got to go back to the real role that, you
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know, it could have been anything.
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I think there was a George Michael song, Freedom, a line
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that says the clothes do not make the man.
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It's the same concept, right? You might look a certain way.
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But what I want to discuss today and get to using these two
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examples is there's a psychological phenomenon known
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as the Halo effect. And basically it means depending
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on we assigned. And that's why I came up the I
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remember the I, I played an Angel because I had the Halo.
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Obviously I had no, none of the capabilities, but it's our
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tendency, human tendency to use one aspect of a person like they
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they're physically fit, right? Wow, they're whatever you can
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assign. I listed a whole bunch like
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they're wearing the right clothes, they have the right
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initials after their name and they're well clothed.
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From that, we then infer they have the capabilities, the
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qualifying like highly qualified for unrelated things, right.
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For example, we can we can think using the first example, this
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well crocked person like wow, they look like they take care of
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themselves. Let let's even add another layer
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because obviously to be that attractive to be for us to be
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overwhelmed by admiration and infatuation.
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This person obviously what's attractive to us and we're
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thinking, wow, unrelated now, wow.
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They look so like they take time to take care of themselves.
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And then if we happen to think about their homes, like, oh,
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they must be very neat too, you know, because it takes a lot of
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effort to go and take care of themselves.
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Their clothes look nice. They're whatever, whatever,
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whatever. And we assign it based on the
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Halo effect because the Halo kind of signs over everything,
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right? Like you hear this, Well, you
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may hear like sort of like the angels are singing the Halos.
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The Halo effect is happening and we human, our human mind do not
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jump to the conclusion like, oh, they may just look nice, but
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that house is a, you know, a dump.
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They don't know how to clean. There's clothes everywhere and
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whatever maybe their clothes was they, the clothes they were,
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they wore was temporarily rented 'cause there are actually
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services like that out there, right?
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People rent very expensive clothes just to look a certain
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way, like influencers rent private jets, things like that.
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We have a tendency to assign this qualifier for these people
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to be highly qualified, not knowing exactly what they're
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qualified for. That's the Halo effect.
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You, you can look up the the exact explanation for this
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phenomenon and digest it for yourself.
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But this is how I'm explaining now.
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And just say this individual that you encountered, you get to
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work with these people, right? Or or you have further
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encounters or opportunities to interact with these people on
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various different levels. And because from the first
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initial and first impression is is very, very important.
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That's not and you cannot downplay.
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I'm not saying go and look like you roll out of bed, but some
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people also do you know, and and likewise the not so much as a
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Halo effect, but I guess it would be the there's no opponent
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or opposite to the Halo effect. But we also then infer if you
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look like a roll out of bed for certain situations, we then
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infer the same sort of qualifier on how you do the rest of the
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things. But it's the Halo effect that
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has the more devastating potential outcomes because just
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say from a romantic, like you're infatuated, this person is
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beautiful and they they checked all the boxes and yeah, they're
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interested in you. And you had inferred that.
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Wow, unrelated, right? Besides the fact that they they
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look like they put effort into themselves, they're the way they
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dress, the effort they took to get whatever suffixes after
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their name. If it's real, because there are
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a lot of example for that Cambridge professor not real.
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It's actually it's pretty bad, especially for Cambridge.
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Pretty shameful, but things like that and you get in this
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relationship and you, you, you are starry eyed and you're
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imagining how great life would be with these people based on
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that initial and first impression is leave alone once
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we had made a decision, conflict decided, we, we picked the road
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that we're going to travel on. There's also like confirmation
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bias. We want to confirm if our
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confirmation were then found to be wrong.
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There's we suffer stress and cognitive dissonance.
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They're like, Oh my God, this cannot be true.
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That's why a lot of times even when we are proving proven
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wrong, we fight to maintain that perception.
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First impressions are very important but you know this one
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overwhelms you. You get in the relationship with
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this person and long like long term relationship you have
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committed to each other and then you start getting that's fine.
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But from the looks of this person I had inferred that they
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are good at housekeeping, they are good at communications, they
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are good at finances, they are good at being truthful.
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Because of the Halo effect we had give them the, they are now
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the Angel. Like it qualifies them for
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everything, right? Because the Halo effect means
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they're pure and it's it, it gives a glow to everything.
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We tend not to think bad. I mean, who wears a Halo that's
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bad? I mean, come on.
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I, I don't believe fallen angels wear Halos.
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But you know, 'cause our commonly accepted image of the
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Angel is that they have a Halo, they have this soft lighting
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that makes them perfect. I'm sorry about all my lighting.
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Obviously I don't have the Halo effect anyways.
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Yeah, I just snorted. So the Halo effect and you're
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just like, and you feel cheated by this person like how can that
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be? You lied to me after we have
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sort of surrendered our trust in their ability to do something
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based on this Halo effect. They may have even proven like,
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let's say the suffixes after their name is that they are
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highly, highly capable in the technology world for all the
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Internet security, AI, whatever you can put after your name for
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that. And and that's that's your deal,
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that's your get. That's what gets you like, wow,
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that's awesome. And they still have the looks
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and all this stuff going on for them.
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And you had a sign because of the Halo effect just assumed
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inferred. They are also capable elsewhere
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because capability is, you know, is it.
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I can't say the word compartment.
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It's not isolated. I can't say the word.
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Sometimes I can say the word. So like there's no way it it it
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bleeds through, right. We didn't ask them.
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We just inferred may they may even hinted at it because some
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people do that right. But I'm I'm talking about taking
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responsibility for our part in perpetuating the Halo effect and
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then suffering some potentially bad outcomes because we had
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assigned this wow, the high quality to this person based on
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one aspect of they are really high achievers or do really well
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or an image or how they sounded and or how they portray
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themselves, how they were Larping.
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They could be Oscar winners. They could have played an Angel.
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Does that mean they're an Angel? They can bestow you or whatever,
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bestow their environment where with their capabilities?
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No. And we are perturbed.
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We are just frustrated like how can you what I gave you access
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to do this, that and the other and some of the access we give,
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the allowances, the permissiveness we have given
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like almost control. We surrender ourselves, our
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mind, our trust over these people.
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And we were proven wrong. Like, like, you know, you're so
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good at Internet security. I'm going to give you access to
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my finances. You, you run that too, because
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looks like you got it all together.
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And I don't know how many months, because time really can
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help us, help those of us who may have been overwhelmed by
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admiration or infatuation see clearly who this individual
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really is. Like the totality of them.
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Outside of the Halo effect, The Halo is chipping a little.
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You're like, wait, what? Halo's chip, OK, you know, at
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first you're like, huh, OK, you manage to stress months later,
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let's just say months later, cuz at first you're just like ah la
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da da, everything's going great. It's the exponential effect,
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right? Like at first everything moves
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slow then all of a sudden just shoots up and it just mind
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blown. And you look at your finances
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after having given trust based on the wrongful assumption of
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this individual who's a great Internet security guru, can you
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handle your finances? And then you're like, wait, what
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is this? Look, I see you transferred this
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over to your account, but that's not the reason why I gave that
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to you is for this, not for you to transfer it into your own
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account, but due to something else.
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And justifiably not really, because if they know they're
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doing wrong, they know they're doing wrong.
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But in a way, it's almost we like, we set ourselves up for
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that great big fall like, well, you've had access.
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I mean, you, you said do whatever.
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I trust you. So I was doing whatever.
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So, So what if I did this? I mean, I was doing some other
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stuff too. I do see, I, I helped you here a
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little bit. I did what I was going to do
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here a little bit, but not all the time.
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And I really needed this, right? For whatever.
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Like I want to invest in something because for
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information security, I wanted to get another certificate,
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let's say. And at the time I was, you know,
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it was available, but I'm I'm going to pay you back though.
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And you're frustrated. And in some ways, you know,
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partially like, OK, I should have been more responsible, but
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it's a Halo effect that's that's in it that is taken over control
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because you so want to trust this person that has that look
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like they are the whole deal and everything and a bag of chips or
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bread, whatever. But it wasn't true.
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And we did that to ourselves. I've done it by the way somebody
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looked, by the way somebody had all the right surfaces, by the
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way they dressed. And then after further
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investigation or not even investigation, passive
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investigation, because as time goes on, we start discovering
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the little cracks in the persona.
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If the persona that we built, the Halo effect that we built,
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you're like, well, there's a crack over there.
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Wait, wait, there's a ketchup stain on your, your white Angel,
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you know, robe. What is up with that?
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So and, and we sit in discomfort like, but not knowing why we did
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this. Not it, it's, it's, you know,
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it's human, it it's common. We do this all the time.
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I'm not saying be paranoid because don't we are just like
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stage Zero said, we are all on the stage.
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And some people are really, they're sincere, they're really
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working out. They're actually embodying the
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LAR ping experience, right? They play an Angel.
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Maybe they're working on being an Angel, I don't know,
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whatever. And some role-playing actors
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really get into the character and really become these people.
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So don't be paranoid. What I wanted to share is to
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have the awareness that we have the tendency as humans to to
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project qualifications onto people based on a legitimate
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expertise in one field or looking one way like their
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fitness models, like, you know, work out those people that all
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they do is go to the gym and film themselves.
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And from the way they look, they look lean, they look beautiful
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in their clothes. And, and all of a sudden we are
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assigning whatever it is our imagination wants to assign to
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them. The qualification.
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It could be a number of thing like whatever, it's endless.
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And we fall down that rabbit hole and we just start just, you
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know, like Oprah, you get this, you get that you can assign the
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qualifications for everything, everybody you know, for
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everything that I want to assign you.
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And then we find ourselves all like like angry that it's not
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true when it's proven not true. I'm not saying that there are
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individuals out there that cannot still be qualified in
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other areas based on one expertise, right?
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But to blindly, the tendency for us to blindly assign
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qualifications based on one thing that we know of, right?
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Whether it's real or not real, it is the outcomes are not good.
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And we're setting ourselves up for the fall, right?
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Nobody's perfect. And there are people out there
30:35
that that are just extraordinary.
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They could be good at almost anything you can name, but those
30:43
people are rare and are treasures.
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So I wanted to share this. So we are aware that OK, I met
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this person and they are indeed extraordinary and wow, you are
31:03
blown away. And they do in reality deserve
31:07
this admiration or infatuation. But to reserve a piece of your
31:15
mind, A piece of my mind, our mind to say, hey, let me, let me
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not falsely or incorrectly, inappropriately assign
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qualifications to unrelated things of life or whatever
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capabilities to them when they didn't ask for it, right?
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It was all in our own mind. Sometimes people actually,
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because they know about the Halo effect, they, they sort of use
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it to manipulate. There are all all kinds of
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people out there. That's why I say don't be
31:54
paranoid. Mostly we can control this, the
32:00
gateway, right? Like this, knowing about this
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phenomenon, a very human phenomenon can help us, can act
32:10
as a preventative measure barrier to us feeling frustrated
32:18
later and wondering why and then erroneously getting mad at the
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person that they didn't even, well, why did you think I was
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going to be good at that? I'm, I'm good at this, you know
32:29
that. But that's all that was all in
32:32
your head. I had nothing to do with it.
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And in that case, we are at fault and something could have
32:38
went catastrophically wrong or just minor inconveniences and
32:43
frustrations. Well, why?
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Why do that when we can have this awareness of the potential
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for us to do so? Like, oh, hey, there's a
32:54
potential, let me stop myself. Let me investigate, right?
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Whether this person look good in their clothes or not, OK, they
33:04
could have been Larping that day.
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I was Larping as an Angel. I was not, nor did I have the
33:10
capabilities. So it it could be a momentary
33:15
thing, that image that they built or for whatever reason,
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right. Maybe the the occasion was
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because it was a business meeting and they are nonetheless
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highly qualified, very intelligent, but they prefer,
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you know, wearing Hawaiian shirts and shorts because that's
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where they're most comfortable. But yet that one image, just
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like Oprah, you get qualified, you get access to the city and
33:48
everything in it, right? And don't do that as a as a
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caution like knowing's half the battle.
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I think in I think the 80s, I don't know it was a rainbow that
34:08
had a star. The more you know or whatever it
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was. This infomercial, not
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infomercials, but info shows like about life.
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They usually have teenage issues or see I, I can't remember.
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I can only remember after the fact because I'm doing this in
34:28
real time and I, I get all tongue tied and can't remember
34:32
nothing. So forgive me.
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So this is what I wanted to share.
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You know, like right now, I won't go.
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Around 3:00 this morning, I put some effort into looking like
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I'm awake. I'm not really.
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I'm not. But I look like it.
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I think I look like it. I put some effort into, you
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know, my hair was like looking like I took care of myself and I
35:07
am ready for the day. I'm not.
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So then maybe some of you. Oh, yeah.
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Wow. You know, she looks like she put
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some effort into which I did into making myself not look like
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I just rolled out of bed, but thinking that I was ready for
35:26
the day and I was prepared and I'm not anxious.
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Well, it that's not true. I'm still anxious.
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I'm not prepared for the day. But it the clothes did not make
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the man. The look does not make the
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person, the suffixes after a person's name does not make them
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completely and holistically qualifying for everything.
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I don't want to belabor the point, but I just wanted to
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share it because we've all, I, I believe we've all done this in
36:05
one way or another, and one whether for good or for bad.
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Maybe your Halo effect worked out, maybe indeed they proved
36:16
your Halo effect correct. Maybe it didn't.
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And and really, we have a role to claim in this whatever
36:32
outcome that happened. Some are just lucky and some are
36:36
not right. But now that we know and no one
36:40
is half the battle GI Joe yeah, let's maybe be more careful not
36:54
to do so and help others also realize this is a human
37:00
phenomenon. We do this because, you know,
37:03
who wouldn't? Who wouldn't want that
37:07
qualifying person to trust somebody into?
37:10
It'd be so easy. Don't be paranoid, but be
37:15
careful. And so maybe we can sidestep
37:20
some of these potholes, you know, the pitfalls that we set
37:27
ourselves up for the fall. So that's what I wanted to
37:34
share, you know, because ramifications of the Halo effect
37:41
in, let's say, higher education in high places can have
37:51
devastating outcomes. And the impact is wide and it's
37:58
deep. And if we can be aware of it on
38:02
all sports levels, I think we can at least reduce the negative
38:11
impact or adverse non beneficial impact of such as using the Halo
38:18
effect for an individual, for a company, for a brand, for
38:24
whatever and just be more aware. Well, thank you for listening if
38:33
I sounded like I was not awake because I'm not.
38:37
And I pray for you guys all the time.
38:40
And until two weeks from now, you guys have a blessed day.
38:43
Bye. Hi, I'm Beaker with Military
38:47
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