Latest / The Ben and Ashley I Almost Famous Podcast / Dirty Rush: No No’s…Ho Ho’s…and Woe Woe’s...in the Sleeping Porch

Transcript

Dirty Rush: No No’s…Ho Ho’s…and Woe Woe’s...in the Sleeping Porch · The Ben and Ashley I Almost Famous Podcast

• 0:01
  Speaker 1: The Secrets of the Sleeping Porch.
• 0:06
  Speaker 2: Hi.
• 0:07
  Speaker 3: This is my sophomore year at University of Michigan. I'm
• 0:11
  Speaker 3: living in at Alpha FI and there's this tiny screen
• 0:14
  Speaker 3: den sleeping porch. Usually at a lot of schools, I
• 0:18
  Speaker 3: feel like don't have sleeping porches, but we do. And
• 0:21
  Speaker 3: it was basically five little beds like crammed together, and
• 0:25
  Speaker 3: the rule of thumb, like rule number absolutely one was
• 0:29
  Speaker 3: absolutely no boys allowed.
• 0:30
  Speaker 4: It's strictly for girls.
• 0:31
  Speaker 3: Want for gossip, cheap wine of course, and while whatever
• 0:34
  Speaker 3: we get up to when everyone's not home and we
• 0:37
  Speaker 3: come home from a night out and we're sort of drunk.
• 0:40
  Speaker 3: One Friday night, me and my friends Emmalilah and Sophie
• 0:43
  Speaker 3: are hanging out sipping wine. We'd just gotten back from
• 0:46
  Speaker 3: going out, and we decided to play a game called
• 0:48
  Speaker 3: our Past Hookups.
• 0:50
  Speaker 4: One of the.
• 0:50
  Speaker 3: Things that we all love, love to talk about because
• 0:53
  Speaker 3: a lot of us are Eskimo sisters, so it's just
• 0:56
  Speaker 3: great to reminisce and maybe talk about the things that
• 1:01
  Speaker 3: we all got up to. The rules are simple. We
• 1:03
  Speaker 3: all wrote our name on a little piece of paper
• 1:07
  Speaker 3: of our best hookup, folded up, folded it up, and
• 1:10
  Speaker 3: put it.
• 1:11
  Speaker 4: In a little bowl.
• 1:12
  Speaker 3: Then we all took turns pulling a name and giving
• 1:14
  Speaker 3: like a flirty confession and ridiculous story about that person
• 1:19
  Speaker 3: without saying who wrote it at the end. It kind
• 1:22
  Speaker 3: of sounds innocent, but after a few glasses of wine,
• 1:25
  Speaker 3: it definitely gets chaotic and super juicy. We're laughing, whispering.
• 1:28
  Speaker 3: An Emma start sharing this wild story about a guy
• 1:31
  Speaker 3: she met at a party that she ended up having
• 1:33
  Speaker 3: a one night stand with, and Sophie chimes in with
• 1:36
  Speaker 3: a story about a frat boy who said into her
• 1:39
  Speaker 3: dams in the middle of class. That was a guy
• 1:41
  Speaker 3: everyone's obsessed with and honestly our favorite frat Everyone's laughing
• 1:46
  Speaker 3: so hard, but we are so scared that we were
• 1:49
  Speaker 3: going to wake up the house mom, which happens a lot,
• 1:52
  Speaker 3: and we tended to get into a lot of trouble
• 1:55
  Speaker 3: when we hear it. A little bit later, we hear
• 1:57
  Speaker 3: this like soft rustling noise near the corner of the porch.
• 2:01
  Speaker 3: We all freeze and whisper, like, do you guys hear that?
• 2:05
  Speaker 3: At first, we all pretended like we didn't because it
• 2:07
  Speaker 3: was like three am at this point, and then we
• 2:09
  Speaker 3: started hearing someone talk so Emma gets down slowly creeps
• 2:14
  Speaker 3: towards the corner, and there's this guy that we literally
• 2:17
  Speaker 3: were just talking about. Emma had just pulled this card
• 2:21
  Speaker 3: and it was the exact guy that we were just
• 2:22
  Speaker 3: talking about, which I feel like we always speak people up,
• 2:25
  Speaker 3: Like anytime I'm talking to anyone and I bring up
• 2:28
  Speaker 3: their name, I feel like I speak them into existence. Anyway,
• 2:31
  Speaker 3: he is crouched behind this chair, looking totally panic. We
• 2:34
  Speaker 3: all scream and we jump onto the beds. We all
• 2:37
  Speaker 3: like knock the wine over because we were like, holy shit,
• 2:40
  Speaker 3: like I can't believe that they're here, that he's here,
• 2:42
  Speaker 3: and we're trying to like block him with a blanket
• 2:44
  Speaker 3: so like no one can see him, and like we
• 2:47
  Speaker 3: literally don't wake anyone up. He tries to explain like,
• 2:52
  Speaker 3: uh I thought this was empty, like pretending like he
• 2:54
  Speaker 3: didn't know. And so Emma, being the investigator she is,
• 2:58
  Speaker 3: says now like, well, now that you're here, you have
• 3:00
  Speaker 3: to play the game with us. So he sits there
• 3:02
  Speaker 3: awkwardly like all of us in this tiny, tiny little room,
• 3:05
  Speaker 3: and we continue to drink and playing our game. And
• 3:07
  Speaker 3: now it's honestly way more intense that he's here. Every
• 3:10
  Speaker 3: story we read or confession we share gets him blushing
• 3:13
  Speaker 3: like crazy, and we're teasing him NonStop. Meanwhile, the porch chaos,
• 3:17
  Speaker 3: Emma's like lying half asleep, Everyone's like whispering, bright red,
• 3:23
  Speaker 3: and at one point he tries to like grab the
• 3:25
  Speaker 3: blanket and like stay over. By the end of the night,
• 3:28
  Speaker 3: he sneaks out and we all like go to sleep
• 3:30
  Speaker 3: trying to catch our breath, and the porch literally reeks
• 3:32
  Speaker 3: of wine and just complete embarrassment the moment we woke
• 3:36
  Speaker 3: up and like that night, like it was just crazy,
• 3:39
  Speaker 3: and we always talk about it the Hidden Boy with
• 3:41
  Speaker 3: the thirty Confessions, and it honestly became legendary and a
• 3:45
  Speaker 3: fy and we ended up telling everyone and it was
• 3:48
  Speaker 3: just so funny and honestly unforgettable. And I do miss
• 3:51
  Speaker 3: those moments of being in the porch.
• 3:55
  Speaker 5: So basically, when we lived in our already house apparently
• 4:01
  Speaker 5: rumor house, it it was built on top of, like
• 4:06
  Speaker 5: I don't know, like an old nursing facility, I don't know.
• 4:12
  Speaker 5: But anytime that we would sleep in the sleeping porch,
• 4:17
  Speaker 5: there were a couple times where I would wake up
• 4:20
  Speaker 5: in the middle of the night and I would be
• 4:22
  Speaker 5: like really really anxious and sweating and have to leave
• 4:26
  Speaker 5: the room. And it was a sleeping porch, so it
• 4:28
  Speaker 5: was always cold and always quiet and always dark, and
• 4:34
  Speaker 5: one of my girlfriends slept directly across from me. I
• 4:38
  Speaker 5: don't remember how we chose our beds. I think there
• 4:40
  Speaker 5: were maybe assigned, but anyway, so it was always dark,
• 4:44
  Speaker 5: but directly across from me. It was one of my
• 4:47
  Speaker 5: girlfriends and we both were dating guys in the same
• 4:50
  Speaker 5: frat and anyways, we would both wake up and like
• 4:56
  Speaker 5: we never really spoke about it until our junior year
• 4:59
  Speaker 5: because we lived in a sophomore year and we would
• 5:03
  Speaker 5: just feel this weird presence and it was so uncomfortable,
• 5:08
  Speaker 5: like we would leave and we would go sleep on
• 5:10
  Speaker 5: the day beds in our bedroom. It was really really
• 5:13
  Speaker 5: nerve wracking, and luckily, like I said, our boyfriends lived
• 5:17
  Speaker 5: in a fraternity house and so most nights we would
• 5:21
  Speaker 5: sleep there because the guys had their own bedrooms. But
• 5:25
  Speaker 5: one night, I think our junior year, we finally like
• 5:28
  Speaker 5: talked about it. Somehow came up our scary experiences and
• 5:32
  Speaker 5: we both identically identified this figure of this tall man
• 5:38
  Speaker 5: with like some weird hat on with a briefcase in
• 5:42
  Speaker 5: his right arm and looking down, and he was standing
• 5:47
  Speaker 5: right next to her bed, which was right across her mind.
• 5:50
  Speaker 5: So for her he was right next to her, and
• 5:52
  Speaker 5: then for me he was looking directly at me. And
• 5:56
  Speaker 5: it was so scary and so terrifying, and we never
• 5:59
  Speaker 5: took spoke about it until we had moved out. And yeah,
• 6:04
  Speaker 5: so there were a couple other instances, but it was
• 6:07
  Speaker 5: really really terrifying and it still stays with me till
• 6:10
  Speaker 5: this day.
• 6:12
  Speaker 4: I loved living in Porch. It was so much fun.
• 6:15
  Speaker 4: As you know, it's like a big part of like
• 6:17
  Speaker 4: our like houses, Like Charm was like that. We had
• 6:20
  Speaker 4: this like big room that was like really fun and
• 6:22
  Speaker 4: had like eight girls in it. I think a lot
• 6:24
  Speaker 4: of times, like sleeping porches can be kind of like
• 6:25
  Speaker 4: scary because it's like, oh my god, it's a bunch
• 6:27
  Speaker 4: of girls in one room, But like ours was very
• 6:30
  Speaker 4: you wanted to be in that room and like you
• 6:31
  Speaker 4: wanted to be that like that room that everyone came
• 6:33
  Speaker 4: and like hung out in and everything. Just some funny
• 6:36
  Speaker 4: stories that we had. We had a hoverboard in our room,
• 6:39
  Speaker 4: which was really fun, and there was like a lot
• 6:41
  Speaker 4: of times where like the people below us, who like
• 6:43
  Speaker 4: were in like the study room, like always had to
• 6:45
  Speaker 4: like ask like what were we doing because we were
• 6:47
  Speaker 4: like hoverboarding around, which is like funny because we had
• 6:49
  Speaker 4: to explain to them that we were overboarding. Another time,
• 6:52
  Speaker 4: I was on the hoverboard and I was going to
• 6:55
  Speaker 4: the snack room with my friend Claire. I like really
• 6:58
  Speaker 4: lay at like two or three in the morning, and
• 7:00
  Speaker 4: I ended up turning too fast and I busted through
• 7:04
  Speaker 4: someone else's door. And I was so grateful that she
• 7:07
  Speaker 4: was awake at two in the morning because I literally
• 7:10
  Speaker 4: like literally busted through her door, Like she was so
• 7:13
  Speaker 4: surprised to see me like fly through on a hoverboard,
• 7:15
  Speaker 4: and so like we always just laugh about that because
• 7:18
  Speaker 4: Sweet Maya had like no idea that we like I
• 7:21
  Speaker 4: was gonna fly in at two in the morning, let
• 7:22
  Speaker 4: alone anyone that was awake. Some other like cute fun memories,
• 7:25
  Speaker 4: like we had like a mega bed, Like the last
• 7:27
  Speaker 4: night we all got to sleep like in the same
• 7:28
  Speaker 4: room together. It was really fun, like getting ready all
• 7:32
  Speaker 4: together with like a huge vanity mirror. That was really
• 7:34
  Speaker 4: fun that we all like had all of our like
• 7:36
  Speaker 4: makeup and stuff on the front. What else in our room,
• 7:40
  Speaker 4: Like we had things called pinnings, and basically it's like
• 7:43
  Speaker 4: a frat wedding, like you get married to your like
• 7:45
  Speaker 4: quote unquote marry or pinned to your boyfriend, and then
• 7:48
  Speaker 4: when you get pinned usually it's like a senior. They
• 7:51
  Speaker 4: signed their name on our beams, which was really cute.
• 7:53
  Speaker 4: So all the beams are like full of signatures like
• 7:55
  Speaker 4: from like a really long time ago, which was like
• 7:57
  Speaker 4: so fun to see like all the history and if
• 7:59
  Speaker 4: you ever get me, like you can come back and
• 8:00
  Speaker 4: circle or sorry, put a heart around it. So it's
• 8:03
  Speaker 4: really cute because like we'd be all sitting in bed
• 8:05
  Speaker 4: and we'd just be like laughing because we'd like see
• 8:07
  Speaker 4: people's names and like with like hearts around it, and
• 8:10
  Speaker 4: it was like, oh, like you know, a class of
• 8:11
  Speaker 4: sixty nine or something like that, and so that was
• 8:14
  Speaker 4: always really fun to have, and we all got to
• 8:16
  Speaker 4: like decorate the beams when we were done. We had
• 8:19
  Speaker 4: like a pyramid like Abby Lee Miller's like dance mom.
• 8:23
  Speaker 4: So that was fun. So whenever like one of us
• 8:24
  Speaker 4: did something awesome, they'd be at the top of the pyramid.
• 8:26
  Speaker 4: Whenever some one of us, like you know, didn't clean
• 8:28
  Speaker 4: up or I don't know how a crazy night, they
• 8:30
  Speaker 4: would put it at the bottom, so it was like
• 8:31
  Speaker 4: a fun way for us to just like continue laughing.
• 8:34
  Speaker 4: And we always have like an open door. That was
• 8:36
  Speaker 4: really fun, like everyone can always come in and like
• 8:38
  Speaker 4: just hang out and like sit, like whether that was
• 8:40
  Speaker 4: just like sitting in our hammock or like using the hoverboard,
• 8:43
  Speaker 4: or if it was like getting ready to go out
• 8:44
  Speaker 4: and just like hearing music and stuff. So that was
• 8:46
  Speaker 4: always really fun.
• 9:02
  Speaker 2: Okay, as a sorority girl, I was really shocked to
• 9:07
  Speaker 2: hear the title theme of this episode because I have
• 9:11
  Speaker 2: never heard of a sleeping porch in my entire life
• 9:14
  Speaker 2: until now. I for reference, went to a school where
• 9:19
  Speaker 2: the sorority housing was attached to on campus housing and
• 9:24
  Speaker 2: student housing and all of that. So they were sorority
• 9:29
  Speaker 2: houses and fraternity houses. There was a whole greek row,
• 9:32
  Speaker 2: and they were all together, but they were built uniform
• 9:36
  Speaker 2: like the dorms, and they did have quite a few
• 9:39
  Speaker 2: differences from other schools that had their sorority houses and
• 9:45
  Speaker 2: their greek row and all that off campus or just
• 9:47
  Speaker 2: in houses that weren't associated with student housing. So the
• 9:54
  Speaker 2: way that ours was different was ai that we didn't
• 9:57
  Speaker 2: have a sleeping porch. I can't believe I've never heard
• 9:59
  Speaker 2: of that still. But we also didn't have a chef
• 10:04
  Speaker 2: or anything like that. So downstairs we had a big
• 10:07
  Speaker 2: living room where we had chapter and everybody would just
• 10:10
  Speaker 2: hang out and all that. We had a kitchen, but
• 10:14
  Speaker 2: it was for girls to use, so anyone who lived
• 10:16
  Speaker 2: in could use the fridge and use all the amenities,
• 10:19
  Speaker 2: but we didn't have a chef. And then we had
• 10:24
  Speaker 2: a smaller boardroom downstairs that's where EZEC would do their
• 10:27
  Speaker 2: meetings and where all of the girls who were matching
• 10:31
  Speaker 2: during rush would be on their computers or whatever. And
• 10:33
  Speaker 2: then the second floor was a bunch of It was
• 10:39
  Speaker 2: kind of a mix.
• 10:40
  Speaker 1: There were bigger.
• 10:41
  Speaker 2: Rooms that all the rooms on the second floor were better.
• 10:43
  Speaker 2: A lot of them were singles that only had communal
• 10:46
  Speaker 2: bathrooms with like four different girls, so they were really
• 10:49
  Speaker 2: highly sought after, and the way that you would get
• 10:51
  Speaker 2: one of those was if you were on exec or
• 10:54
  Speaker 2: if you were topping grades, and that meant you got
• 10:57
  Speaker 2: the first choice of your room. A lot of girls
• 10:59
  Speaker 2: would grab take towards those, and then the third floor
• 11:04
  Speaker 2: was just all the regular double rooms and communal bathrooms,
• 11:08
  Speaker 2: so that's kind of the way our house was set up.
• 11:11
  Speaker 2: And the other interesting thing is we had about ninety
• 11:17
  Speaker 2: two one hundred girls in a pledge class, and only
• 11:20
  Speaker 2: forty girls could live in this house at a time,
• 11:24
  Speaker 2: so it was a much smaller group. And typically it
• 11:28
  Speaker 2: was only sophomores that got to live in unless you
• 11:30
  Speaker 2: were on EXEC, and then if you were on EXEC
• 11:35
  Speaker 2: as a junior or a senior, you would be required
• 11:37
  Speaker 2: to live in the house as well, So those were
• 11:39
  Speaker 2: kind of the only exceptions. But other than that, that's
• 11:44
  Speaker 2: kind of the gist on how our house was set up.
• 11:46
  Speaker 2: And I don't think I realized in college how different
• 11:51
  Speaker 2: this setup might have been to a lot of people
• 11:53
  Speaker 2: who had the chefs. I kind of feel like we
• 11:55
  Speaker 2: missed out on the meals and stuff. I don't know
• 11:58
  Speaker 2: if I feel like we missed out on this being
• 12:00
  Speaker 2: porched because it sounds a bit insane and far fetched
• 12:05
  Speaker 2: to me who lived in a house that was just
• 12:09
  Speaker 2: so much smaller and.
• 12:12
  Speaker 6: Pretty chill.
• 12:13
  Speaker 2: But who knows, it could have been really fun. I'm
• 12:16
  Speaker 2: interested to hear all of the stories on the sleeping porch.
• 12:20
  Speaker 6: In my experience being in a sorority, the sleeping porch
• 12:24
  Speaker 6: is actually something that my sorority really really enjoys, and
• 12:29
  Speaker 6: the girls all honestly like kind of fight to get
• 12:32
  Speaker 6: that room, which is definitely untraditional and definitely not the
• 12:39
  Speaker 6: usual living arrangement for most girls. I know, it's quite
• 12:43
  Speaker 6: common to want a single or double with a friend,
• 12:47
  Speaker 6: or honestly at most like a quad. But in my
• 12:50
  Speaker 6: sorority house, what we call porch is a room with
• 12:55
  Speaker 6: eight girls, and this year actually had ten girls, so
• 12:58
  Speaker 6: they added an entirely new bunk bed in there, and honestly,
• 13:03
  Speaker 6: like the sleeping porch in my house kind of represents
• 13:07
  Speaker 6: exactly what all the girls really really want to get
• 13:10
  Speaker 6: out of being a sorority, which is making really amazing
• 13:13
  Speaker 6: friendships and bonding with girls that maybe wouldn't otherwise have
• 13:18
  Speaker 6: had the opportunity to get close with. Especially in a
• 13:22
  Speaker 6: pledge class with around sixty girls, it can feel kind
• 13:26
  Speaker 6: of daunting to form relationships and get close, and so
• 13:30
  Speaker 6: the porch kind of represents a way to kind of
• 13:32
  Speaker 6: like hack that I guess, and live with like one
• 13:36
  Speaker 6: sixth of your pledge class like right off the bat
• 13:39
  Speaker 6: and just become friends pretty much immediately. So it's really
• 13:43
  Speaker 6: popular in my house and I guess there are a
• 13:47
  Speaker 6: couple of funny stories that I've come from it, one
• 13:51
  Speaker 6: of which actually ended up on a lot of really
• 13:55
  Speaker 6: popular instagrams. I'm pretty sure it ended up on bar
• 14:00
  Speaker 6: stool Sports a couple of years ago. But basically, very
• 14:05
  Speaker 6: very funny story in my house is that because our
• 14:08
  Speaker 6: house is very casual, doors are kind of left open
• 14:12
  Speaker 6: in bedrooms. You can kind of just go in and out.
• 14:15
  Speaker 6: There's a really close relationship between all the live ins,
• 14:17
  Speaker 6: so no one really feels the need to like lock
• 14:19
  Speaker 6: up their space. And a couple of years ago, someone
• 14:23
  Speaker 6: left one of the doors open in said porch, and
• 14:29
  Speaker 6: you know, the girls come home from class and one
• 14:32
  Speaker 6: of the girls is taking a nap and she turns
• 14:35
  Speaker 6: to her right and there's a squirrel sitting on her
• 14:39
  Speaker 6: roommate's bed. And at this point, it had been spring
• 14:43
  Speaker 6: semester when a lot of girls were abroad, so the
• 14:46
  Speaker 6: sleeping porch was actually quite empty. I think it was
• 14:49
  Speaker 6: five girls sleeping in quite a big room, and so
• 14:52
  Speaker 6: it was five bunk beds. And she managed to get
• 14:58
  Speaker 6: this whole thing on video. But basically she filmed with
• 15:01
  Speaker 6: the craziest high pitched scream as a squirrel jumped from
• 15:05
  Speaker 6: bed to bed and basically couldn't get out, and it's
• 15:09
  Speaker 6: really funny. She's basically screaming bloody murder as she watches
• 15:14
  Speaker 6: her room get taken over by a squirrel. So, honestly,
• 15:18
  Speaker 6: I think that maybe enticed girls more to live in
• 15:21
  Speaker 6: there because it has such a funny reputation in my house.
• 15:24
  Speaker 6: But I have nothing but good things to say about
• 15:28
  Speaker 6: the idea of a porch. I think it's a really
• 15:30
  Speaker 6: amazing bonding opportunity, and all the girls in my house
• 15:33
  Speaker 6: honestly kind of fight each other for it because they
• 15:35
  Speaker 6: know it's that amazing.
• 15:38
  Speaker 1: So one night, my girlfriends and I from my sorority
• 15:42
  Speaker 1: were coming back to our sorority house after a night out,
• 15:46
  Speaker 1: and we had just dropped off our guy friends because
• 15:50
  Speaker 1: they aren't allowed to even be in the sleeping porch
• 15:54
  Speaker 1: or the cold room as it's also called, So we
• 15:58
  Speaker 1: drop them off in the We all go to bed
• 16:01
  Speaker 1: like normal, and then we wake up the next morning
• 16:05
  Speaker 1: and everything's fine, but someone texts our girls group chat
• 16:10
  Speaker 1: and goes look at this specific bed and there was
• 16:14
  Speaker 1: a guy in the bed alone, like just sleeping there alone,
• 16:18
  Speaker 1: and so we all ran out of the room started
• 16:21
  Speaker 1: dying laughing. We had no idea how he had gotten
• 16:24
  Speaker 1: in there. We didn't see him when we got back
• 16:27
  Speaker 1: from going out, and we have no idea how he
• 16:30
  Speaker 1: got in there. And we also don't know how he left.
• 16:33
  Speaker 1: Because we were just dying laughing, we didn't want to
• 16:36
  Speaker 1: go back in the room. But someone we assume had
• 16:39
  Speaker 1: snuck in, a guy, and he stayed the night, but
• 16:43
  Speaker 1: she had left him in the morning, and so we
• 16:47
  Speaker 1: don't know how or why he was there. But it
• 16:50
  Speaker 1: was a crazy morning