Latest / The Mental Healness Podcast / How to stop attracting Narcissists into your life
Transcript
- 0:00How to stop attracting Narcissist and Toxic people If
- 0:05you're new here, my name is Lee Hammock.
- 0:07I'm a clinically diagnosed narcissist and welcome to
- 0:10another episode of the Narcissist Code.
- 0:29Boom. Welcome back.
- 0:31Welcome back. Welcome back.
- 0:34How to Stop Attracting Narcissists.
- 0:37OK, y'all. You can't.
- 0:40The type the thumbnail was clickbait.
- 0:42You cannot stop attracting narcissists.
- 0:44Sorry, no, that's funny. But y'all.
- 0:48Seriously, it's it's like you. You can to a certain extent.
- 0:54They're always going to be, you can make yourself almost narc
- 0:57proof, but there's always going to be people who can kind of
- 1:00slither through the boundaries, who can kind of slither through.
- 1:03It's like, Oh my goodness, this is a good analogy right here.
- 1:06Look, look, you can take a you can take a vaccine.
- 1:12But sometimes the the virus or the bacteria, the vaccines or
- 1:16viruses, the the virus mutates, you get a different variant of
- 1:23the narcissist. God, what do these analogies be
- 1:28coming from? Y'all.
- 1:31Oh my goodness. You could take the narcissist
- 1:34vaccine, but there's going to be different variants.
- 1:37Y'all. Oh my goodness, no.
- 1:43Yeah, I know. Y'all, if y'all y'all, what is
- 1:47y'all? Before we go hop and get too
- 1:49deep into this video, what is y'all?
- 1:51I've said a lot of crazy analogies on this channel.
- 1:53If y'all remember what your favorite analogy of mine is,
- 1:57just put in the comment section of this video on YouTube.
- 1:59You can't you can't do it on the podcast but on YouTube.
- 2:02See me your favorite analogy of mine.
- 2:03I'm just interested or what? Y'all y'all if y'all been
- 2:06listening for a while, that's cool.
- 2:08We're back to the topic here. You you cannot prove yourself.
- 2:13You really, really can, y'all. But some certain people are
- 2:16going to just, they're going to slip it through, you know?
- 2:20They just are like the best way to stop, to stop attracting
- 2:23narcissistic people. Y'all you have to is to
- 2:29boundaries. I said it before, I have to say
- 2:32it again. I have to say it again.
- 2:34Even if you attract A narcissistic person boundaries
- 2:37becomes a force field that's that bounces them back.
- 2:42Boundaries not beside you know boundaries protect you.
- 2:45Boundaries are a fence or a gate or a big castle.
- 2:49Wall. Boundaries are a big wall used
- 2:52to protect the castle. You you are the castle in this.
- 2:55In this example right here. Boundaries what you are
- 2:58comfortable with they protect you.
- 3:00They keep narcissists away. That person A don't go over and
- 3:04talk to her, man. Hey, she ain't.
- 3:05She ain't bought them games. That's what they say.
- 3:08Hey don't talk to him. He he he knows what he's looking
- 3:11for. He he, you know don't talk to
- 3:13them. They know what they're looking
- 3:14for. You see what I'm saying?
- 3:15That's how they go get you. That's how they get you right
- 3:17there. Like they they you spread you.
- 3:20When you start sitting at force field or those boundaries.
- 3:22They said they bounce back away from it.
- 3:25Boundaries become a force field to help protect you against
- 3:27narcissistic people. See if he, even if they just
- 3:30try, if they mutate. You know what I mean.
- 3:33No narcissist. None.
- 3:35This is one of the y'all. This is me being able to speak
- 3:38in an absolute about narcissistic people.
- 3:41No narcissist. Or very rarely.
- 3:43When you find a narcissist that enjoys A boundary being set on
- 3:47them that will respect a boundary under a like for a long
- 3:53period of time. They might do it at first
- 3:56though. You just have to set multiple
- 3:57boundaries. Y'all you have to set multiple
- 4:00boundaries. That's how you stop attracting
- 4:01Narcissus. That's one way to stop
- 4:03attracting Narcissus is to stop is to keep setting your
- 4:06boundaries and keep them firm. Firm boundaries, firm.
- 4:10Steel plate. Your boundaries are steel.
- 4:12Steel boundaries, not wood. Not steel plated wood or steel
- 4:17plated rubber bands or something like because they still steal a
- 4:21rubber band with steel on it. Steel boundaries.
- 4:24You see what I'm saying? Diamond boundaries.
- 4:27Not cubic zirconia boundaries. Diamond.
- 4:29Diamond. I mean diamond boundaries.
- 4:32Not those cubic zirconia boundaries.
- 4:34Diamond ones. Diamonds.
- 4:35It's hard, unbreakable, tough. Cut through the, cut through the
- 4:39BS. You know what I mean?
- 4:41Diamond boundaries. That's how you that's the way
- 4:43you go about doing it, right? That's how you empower yourself.
- 4:45That's how you that's how you be as strong as you possibly can.
- 4:47Diamond boundaries, you have to keep moving forward with it.
- 4:50Y'all. That's how you empower.
- 4:52But that's seriously how you empower yourself having those
- 4:54boundaries. Another way, y'all, to stop
- 4:56attracting narcissists is y'all stop being a yes person.
- 5:00Stop being become a become a person that's not afraid to say
- 5:03no. Because if you keep saying yes,
- 5:06you're going to be taken advantage of.
- 5:08Let's just keep it hiding ready. Like the more you just say if
- 5:10you are scared to say no, you're going to get taken advantage of.
- 5:13And that's just me being, that's me being as real as I can be
- 5:16with you. If you are afraid of saying the
- 5:18word no, you're going to get taken advantage of.
- 5:22Stop being a yes person. Don't be afraid to say no.
- 5:24Because if you're afraid to say no, you're you're going to get
- 5:27into a situation where you can't enforce.
- 5:29You can have a boundary, but you can't say no to enforce that
- 5:32boundary. You're going to get ran over top
- 5:34of by toxic narcissistic person. You see what I'm saying?
- 5:37They're going to keep doing that to you because it benefits them.
- 5:40A narcissist is going to do whatever it takes to benefit
- 5:43themselves. So stop being a yes narcissist,
- 5:46Certain narcissist. Seek out Yes.
- 5:49Yes, people. It's like you have a big ass.
- 5:52The scarlet. The scarlet.
- 5:54YES. On your forehead.
- 5:55I've been a scarlet. A the scarlet letter.
- 5:57It's a scarlet word. YES on your forehead.
- 5:59Like I need a yes person. You over there at the Look, this
- 6:02is in the workplace right here. I need a yes person.
- 6:04Where's a yes person? I need somebody to.
- 6:05I need somebody to. I need a target to manipulate
- 6:09you. You Over there at the water
- 6:10cooler. You already got the big ass Yes
- 6:12on your forehead. Stop being a yes person.
- 6:15It's tough. It's scary.
- 6:16I understand it too. Y'all because believe it or not,
- 6:19I know y'all see me. You like I have been.
- 6:21I've been a yes person. So I understand how tough it is
- 6:24to say no to people sometimes and it's just me being realistic
- 6:26with you. I understand how tough it is to
- 6:28say no Because I'm a human being.
- 6:31Because I'm a grown. I'm a grown, grown.
- 6:32If y'all ever met me in real life, I'm not even.
- 6:34I'm not a little dude. I'm six.
- 6:36I'm 63200 and 50 lbs. I'm not a little dude.
- 6:40I have trouble saying no to people.
- 6:41So I understand how hard it is to say no to people because you
- 6:44don't want to hurt their feelings.
- 6:45You don't want to seem like you don't want to seem like a party.
- 6:47A buzzkill. Y'all be a buzzkill.
- 6:53Y'all. Sometimes you have to be a
- 6:55buzzkill. When you can kill their buzz.
- 6:57You can when you can. If a if a narcissist is a damn
- 7:00buzzing bee, if you can kill their buz.
- 7:03It's a bit more power to you. If they're just little.
- 7:06Be narcissist. Getting ready.
- 7:08Getting ready to come sting your ass.
- 7:10If you can say no, you can be a buzzkill, then you stop them
- 7:13from stinging you. You don't get stung by the
- 7:16narcissistic person. So don't be a yes person.
- 7:20Be a person that's not afraid to say no but warm up to it.
- 7:22Y'all. I don't like that.
- 7:24There's other ways to say no. I don't like that.
- 7:26That makes me uncomfortable. You don't have to say say the
- 7:28word no. You can say a word no.
- 7:30If that works for you, that is. I don't really like that.
- 7:32I don't. I don't enjoy that type of stuff
- 7:34that makes me uncomfortable. I really don't want to go there.
- 7:36You see how that works, right There.
- 7:38Be a buzzkill. Sometimes you have to kill that
- 7:40buzz. Y'all.
- 7:40You're not boring you, just a buzzkill you.
- 7:43You're going to kill the When you set boundaries and you stop
- 7:45saying yes to everything, you're going to be a buzzkill for the
- 7:48wrong, for the for the wrong person.
- 7:50The right people. It won't kill that buzz.
- 7:52It'll just make them buzz more. Oh, boundaries.
- 7:56Love it. Love a girl with boundaries.
- 7:58You know what I'm saying? You know what?
- 8:02Consent is sexy, isn't it? You see what I'm saying?
- 8:04That's how it goes. But in that space, you know,
- 8:06space is right there. That's what you got to get used
- 8:08to, setting boundaries, like that's how you stop attracting
- 8:11narcissistic people. Y'all you know, because it's
- 8:14it's it's really, really difficult to not attract them
- 8:16Y'all because the goal is you know, you want to look your
- 8:19best, you want to feel your best.
- 8:20You want to be your best. When you become your best self,
- 8:24you will stop attracting the wrong people.
- 8:26When you become the right person for yourself, when you become
- 8:29the best version of yourself, you will stop attracting the
- 8:32wrong people to you. You know, once you start your
- 8:36your glow up journey, whatever that glow up journey looks like
- 8:38for you, weight loss, weight gain, weight, whatever, eating
- 8:42better, eating whatever, y'all, whatever makes you feel like the
- 8:44most authentic version of you. Once you become the most
- 8:47authentic version of yourself where you love yourself, that's
- 8:51how you combat that. That's how you stop.
- 8:54That's how you just bounce back the narcissistic people that
- 8:57might be in your area. If you have a yeah self love is
- 9:01so such a repellent self. If you have a boundary spray or
- 9:06a narcissist repellent, it is called self love.
- 9:09Self love is a narcissist repellent.
- 9:10They don't. They hate it when you love
- 9:12yourself. They hate it when they love
- 9:14yourself. I need somebody who don't love
- 9:16themselves. If you don't love yourself, if
- 9:18you got lack of self love, lack of self esteem smelt if it.
- 9:22If it's oozing out of your pores, they're going it's like a
- 9:24a pheromone that's going to attract that narcissistic
- 9:27person. I smelled a lack of self esteem
- 9:35in here. Where is it at?
- 9:36Oh, it's that person over at the water cooler with a scarlet yes
- 9:39on their head. They also have low self esteem.
- 9:41You see what I'm saying? That's why I live.
- 9:43That's literally why I wrote the Self Love Journal.
- 9:45Why I've created the Self Love Journal to help people rebuild
- 9:48their self love. And that's why I'm working on
- 9:49myself Love course. Right now I need to subscribe to
- 9:52my newsletter. Newsletter is in the the
- 9:55conversation of every video I do because my new self love course
- 9:58comes out. It's going to help people
- 9:59rebuild their self love and re establish their identity.
- 10:02Because if you have enough self love, if you know who you are,
- 10:05y'all, nobody's going to no toxic person.
- 10:07The wrong person is going to want to deal with that.
- 10:11They can't handle it. Even if they such that even if
- 10:13they squeak through, they don't. They can't deal with it for an
- 10:16extended period of time, they can't deal with it.
- 10:19You keep setting boundaries. You only do things that you are
- 10:22comfortable with. You see what I'm saying?
- 10:24If you don't let your boundary, if you don't make your those
- 10:27solid steel boundaries, those solid that's why they use steel
- 10:31to build buildings. Y'all that's solid steel.
- 10:33That's why I want to use play DoH or clay to build buildings.
- 10:37The foundation of the building is is steel and concrete and
- 10:39stuff like that. It's not play DoH.
- 10:42Would you go into a building like hey this building right
- 10:45here is 12 stories high and the foundation is Play DoH.
- 10:49Crazy right? Would you step inside the
- 10:51building would you step No. Most likely you no.
- 10:55You want I need some stick. What the building wants to
- 10:57steel. Reinforce the the with the with
- 10:59the rebar that need to build it with the rebar that need to
- 11:02build it with the play. DoH.
- 11:03You see what I'm saying? That's how you stop attracting
- 11:06narcissism. When you become your most
- 11:07authentic self. When you look, when you glow so
- 11:10much, when you get. When you'll glow up during
- 11:12that's the point y'all. When you glow enough, they can't
- 11:14stand the shine. You glow enough, they can't say,
- 11:17ah, you burn, burn. It's like a vampire.
- 11:20It's like a vampire. When you glow enough, you shine
- 11:21the right light. When you, like I said, vampires,
- 11:24they can. You can shine the flashlight on
- 11:26a vampire and it doesn't do anything to it.
- 11:28But when the sun hit that vampire, it cooks their asses
- 11:30different type of light. It's the right type of light.
- 11:33When you shine that right type of light, when you glowing with
- 11:35that right type of light, they can't do nothing with you.
- 11:39There's nothing they can do with you.
- 11:41Be the best version of you. And if they do slip through the
- 11:44cracks, don't beat yourself up. Just readjust readjust don't
- 11:48beat Ali. I did all of that and they still
- 11:50slip through readjust. Hey bro, I did all that and they
- 11:54still got readjust be prepared to pivot.
- 11:58Be PP, be prepared to pivot, you know what I mean?
- 12:03And be prepared to pivot and like and subscribe to this
- 12:05channel. Y'all 'cause if you haven't
- 12:06already, the rest of four, the rest of 400,000 is here.
- 12:11I truly appreciate every single one of the other has subscribed
- 12:14to my channel so far on my podcast.
- 12:15Thank you so much. I truly enjoy.
- 12:17Y'all. I truly appreciate every single
- 12:18one of y'all mental illnesses out Peace.
- 12:21Thank you so much for making it to the end of my video.
- 12:23You are a mental illness Rockstar and I appreciate you
- 12:25for being here. If you haven't already, make
- 12:27sure to click on the screen to subscribe to the channel and
- 12:30watch another one of my videos on my playlist.
- 12:32There's also a link available up here for you to purchase my
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- 12:39Thank you. I will see you in the next
- 12:41video. Peace.