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Turning Tragedy and Trauma into Purpose: Step Into Your Miracle · No Shrinking Violets Podcast for Women

• 0:05
  Mary: Welcome to No Shrinking Violets.
• 0:07
  Mary: I'm your host, Mary Rothwell, licensed therapist and certified integrative mental health practitioner.
• 0:13
  Mary: I've created a space where we celebrate the intuition and power of women who want to break free from limiting narratives.
• 0:20
  Mary: We'll explore all realms of wellness, what it means to take up space unapologetically, and how your essential nature is key to living life on your terms.
• 0:30
  Mary: It's time to own your space, trust your nature, and flourish.
• 0:34
  Mary: Let's dive in.
• 0:35
  Mary: Hey Violets, welcome to the show.
• 0:39
  Mary: When I was a kid, my mom would often say, there's always someone better off and worse off than you are.
• 0:46
  Mary: When I was a teenager, I was only able to really see the people that were better off than me.
• 0:52
  Mary: As I got older and had less of the egocentric worldview of the young, I started to see more people who had been through really hard things, and it had the effect I think my mom intended.
• 1:03
  Mary: I more readily recognized not only my own blessings, but I appreciated those that were given huge challenges and came through them with strength and resilience.
• 1:12
  Mary: It seems every day, with the internet giving us a window into everything, we see stories of people experiencing life-changing challenges or gut-wrenching loss.
• 1:23
  Mary: And I feel pretty sure that I would struggle to find the grace and radical acceptance to move on that I see in many of these stories.
• 1:30
  Mary: My guest today has experienced her own life-impacting challenges, yet she is here today to tell her story from a place of purpose, balance, and joy.
• 1:40
  Mary: Shannon Michelle was once a leading interior designer in Los Angeles, but she faced unimaginable challenges after a near-fatal motorcycle accident and a battle with breast cancer.
• 1:51
  Mary: Through faith, resilience, and radical self-discovery, she rebuilt her life and now helps others do the same through her book, Step Into Your Miracle, and her patchwork self-care practice.
• 2:03
  Mary: Welcome to No Shrinking Violet Shannon.
• 2:06
  Mary: Hi.
• 2:07
  Mary: Hello, everybody.
• 2:10
  Mary: It's so good to have you here today.
• 2:13
  Shannon: Thank you.
• 2:14
  Shannon: And I I love every moment of this new world I live in, you know.
• 2:20
  Shannon: So thank you for having me.
• 2:22
  Shannon: And um yes.
• 2:23
  Mary: Sure.
• 2:24
  Mary: And we're gonna learn about that world.
• 2:25
  Mary: So, you know, I think that often when we have big things happen, and you certainly had big things happen, we can tend to see life in the the before and the after.
• 2:37
  Mary: And I think, and we talked a little before we hit record of how merging them can sometimes be a challenge.
• 2:44
  Mary: So, what can you tell us about your life before the motorcycle accident and share a little bit how that event happened?
• 2:53
  Mary: Okay.
• 2:55
  Shannon: Uh so as you said, I was a very high-end interior designer here in Los Angeles.
• 3:00
  Shannon: I ran my own company for 25 plus years.
• 3:04
  Shannon: I had furniture stores back in the day when that was a thing.
• 3:07
  Shannon: And um and I had an amazing career uh doing something that I felt very comfortable in and I was very good at, and I I loved the process of.
• 3:18
  Shannon: Um, and so that was what I did before.
• 3:22
  Shannon: And then I and my daughter, I have a daughter, she's uh now 22, and she had just left for college.
• 3:30
  Shannon: And I was feeling this freedom of just taking care of doing my self-care instead of you know doing the mommy care.
• 3:39
  Shannon: And I was I loved being a mom, but I realized that I put a lot of energy into just doing that.
• 3:47
  Shannon: So once she went off to college, I kind of like, oh, house to myself.
• 3:50
  Shannon: And and so one of the things that I had done for about five years is I rode motorcycles with a group, mostly women riders, but it was a group and men and women.
• 4:01
  Shannon: And I, it was my Sunday school.
• 4:04
  Shannon: I went um on Sundays and I would ride and we would do distance riding.
• 4:08
  Shannon: And I was on my way back from one of those rides, and I had uh separated myself from my group.
• 4:13
  Shannon: And um somebody did an illegal U-turn in PCH, Pacific Coast Highway, and they threw me up in the air from what I've been told, 30 to 40 feet, because I don't have any memory of this, thankfully.
• 4:26
  Shannon: Traumatic brain injuries have pluses and minus.
• 4:29
  Shannon: Um, and so um threw me up in the air, landed back.
• 4:36
  Shannon: There happened to be an EMT on the beach that ran up and did his moments of saving my life.
• 4:43
  Shannon: There was a car that saw this happen, that he was a motorcycle rider that stopped everybody from rolling over me.
• 4:49
  Shannon: I mean, layers and layers of gifts in the fact that I'm even sitting here today.
• 4:54
  Shannon: Um, so they drop shipped me into UCLA and they kept me in a coma for a few months because the brain trauma was so severe.
• 5:01
  Shannon: Also, every part of my body was broken, not just the obvious eye, but my brain, both my wrists, my hips, they put new hips in, you name it.
• 5:10
  Shannon: It's it's been adjusted on this person.
• 5:13
  Shannon: Um, and then um so I was in the hospital for about three months, and then they brought me home.
• 5:20
  Shannon: And um and it's been a slow and steady day-to-day moment of recovery because they wouldn't let me walk because I because they they didn't they didn't have any idea what if I was gonna look out a window for the rest of my life, if I was gonna be able to walk, you name it.
• 5:36
  Shannon: They were everybody wondered.
• 5:39
  Shannon: Um, but slowly, and I just kept kind of waking up each morning morning and being like, Okay, okay, and and then I would do whatever it took in that day to get through the day.
• 5:53
  Shannon: And how I could, and that went from learning to walk myself again and you name it, like learn to go to the bathroom by myself, take a shower, like everything had been stolen from me in a way, not stolen, but taken and um deleted because my brain memory also had been deleted from the brain trauma.
• 6:14
  Shannon: And when I woke up, I did not know where I was, I did not understand anything.
• 6:20
  Shannon: And so I had to rebuild my brain capacity as well as my body usage and my like to the point where I didn't even know what a cell phone was or my computer, like major deletes.
• 6:33
  Shannon: Um, and I had to really relearn and regrow how to do all of that again as well.
• 6:39
  Mary: Yeah.
• 6:40
  Mary: My gosh.
• 6:41
  Mary: And so most people will be just listening to this.
• 6:45
  Mary: So I'll tell you that Shannon is wearing an eye patch with, and I don't have my glasses on, so I think it's a heart, right?
• 6:52
  Shannon: It is, it's my it's my logo.
• 6:54
  Shannon: It's a lavender heart and it's winking at you.
• 6:57
  Shannon: And um, it's this of the designer in me when all of this uh, you know, new life that I'm new career, all of that.
• 7:07
  Shannon: I'm like, I want things to look pretty.
• 7:09
  Shannon: So when I put I have to wear my eye patch every day to not have the double vision because there was a severe all kinds of words I can put around it, but basically it gives me double vision.
• 7:20
  Shannon: And so the eye patch is what allows me to, you know, uh depth perception and space and you know, all of the things that you're you don't realize when you have two eyes how much they both do until you're moving you down to one working in the right direction.
• 7:38
  Shannon: So yeah.
• 7:38
  Shannon: Um thank you.
• 7:39
  Shannon: Yes, I love my eye patch.
• 7:41
  Mary: Yeah.
• 7:41
  Mary: Well, and I think about the fact that, you know, when things happen, um huge things happen, it's sometimes as a result of someone else's actions.
• 7:53
  Mary: Was that part of your healing to have to accept that?
• 7:59
  Shannon: I think yes.
• 8:00
  Shannon: I believe that my healing had to do with the concept that I couldn't control things anymore.
• 8:07
  Shannon: And that was huge because I had led my whole life, including riding motorcycles, is I've got control, I can do this mind frame.
• 8:18
  Shannon: And I woke up not being able to do anything and having depend depend on everybody, and that's not a fun feeling.
• 8:27
  Shannon: Um, and so yeah, I I had to find a way to find almost kindness with myself with asking for so much help because I it was hard again.
• 8:40
  Shannon: At first I just felt so guilty that I was putting all these people through this.
• 8:43
  Shannon: And I was like, Oh, Shannon, remember what you're going through too.
• 8:48
  Shannon: And that's what we have to remember is that self-care is like whatever we're going through, we need to do our self-care first.
• 8:54
  Shannon: Because as um an amazing therapist in my recovery said to me, Shannon, don't worry about what happened before or what's going to happen next, but just stay present in this moment.
• 9:06
  Shannon: Talk to me in this moment.
• 9:08
  Shannon: And I kept that with me.
• 9:09
  Shannon: And I had to keep reminding myself that anytime something felt uncomfortable or off or sad or even happy, like you you to stay present in that moment and that be your day and that be your minute.
• 9:23
  Shannon: And and that is that gave me freedom to wake up in pain, to wake up not knowing, and to know that I can try this day today.
• 9:34
  Shannon: And then I could, if I don't do it so well, I'll try it again tomorrow.
• 9:37
  Shannon: And giving myself the space to do that as well, I think that's important anybody's life, is that you give yourself the freedom and the space to be the best you can be today, and not yesterday's Shannon, not tomorrow Shannon, but today's Shannon.
• 9:52
  Shannon: And that's you know, that takes a lot of um again, self-care for me.
• 9:57
  Shannon: It has.
• 9:58
  Mary: Oh, for sure.
• 9:59
  Mary: And you know, you had to recover from not just physical injuries, but the emotional injuries.
• 10:07
  Mary: And how long did it take you to get your memory back?
• 10:10
  Mary: And did that include forgetting people in your life?
• 10:13
  Shannon: Oh, yeah.
• 10:14
  Mary: Oh, wow.
• 10:15
  Shannon: Yeah.
• 10:15
  Shannon: It was, it was, it basically had deleted a lot.
• 10:20
  Shannon: But as my neurologist told me, Shannon, it's all still in there.
• 10:23
  Shannon: Just keep, just keep creating the new pathways in your brain because the brain trauma twisted things up a bit.
• 10:30
  Shannon: But he's like, just know it's still in there.
• 10:32
  Shannon: And I and I just remember, yes, I remember um a little bit of the nursing hospital moments.
• 10:39
  Shannon: And um, that's when I started to have some memory coming back, like that, like recognizing the one person supposedly that they told me I never forgot was my daughter, which of course is the most beautiful thing you want to hear.
• 10:52
  Shannon: I don't you don't want to forget the the the your your your um your heart.
• 10:59
  Shannon: Your heart yeah, that's a good way to put it.
• 11:01
  Shannon: Um and so yeah, and I had you know handfuls of friends, you know, coming to visit me and I'd smile and and say hello, and they would think that I would recognize them, but I don't remember them, or I would ask them to touch my hand because that felt like a connection, like, oh, I kind of remember you.
• 11:22
  Shannon: Tell me your name again.
• 11:23
  Shannon: You know, and I knew you for 25 years.
• 11:25
  Shannon: Tell me your name again.
• 11:26
  Shannon: It got it was a little messy.
• 11:28
  Shannon: Um, and that that has faded away mostly.
• 11:31
  Shannon: Um now I just deal with the short-term memory limitations, which is you know, a lot of people in their lives, whether it be from a traumatic brain injury, but there's all kinds of you know moments that happen to us physically and mentally, where things can be more difficult to think, more difficult to even age, you know, we all I'm I'm now 56, like uh, you know, people say to me, Well, you know, your age, I'm like, yeah, no, I I I know it's my age too, but um, but I've learned how to track things, how to when I know something's super important and I don't want to forget, I have these ABCs that I do to not forget.
• 12:14
  Shannon: And that's hard to do when you run a corporation and have a ton of employees and you think that and you I had no issue remembering anything previous to my accident.
• 12:23
  Shannon: Like even in the interior design world that I was in, I would walk into a space and it would just, it would, it'd be like a picture of my brain, and I'd move it around and the picture is still there.
• 12:36
  Shannon: And I would, I would just be able to do my work months later, years later from from having that visual moment.
• 12:43
  Shannon: And um, that was that was an important part, I think, of my my personal recovery because I when I looked at images of somebody, I'd be like, oh yeah, I remember you.
• 12:53
  Shannon: Oh, that's a trip we took.
• 12:55
  Shannon: Or, you know, and again, I think visual is a strong place to start with brain, any kind of brain difficulties.
• 13:03
  unknown: Yeah.
• 13:04
  Mary: Well, you mentioned the people visiting you.
• 13:06
  Mary: And when I looked at your website, you have pictures of yourself in the hospital.
• 13:11
  Mary: But the one thing that I really noticed was you had a wall of all kinds of pictures and someone, oh, I'm trying to think of the quote now.
• 13:21
  Mary: Oh, I can't think of the quote.
• 13:23
  Mary: Darn it.
• 13:23
  Mary: Um, but somebody had written something, and but when I saw that, I was like, wow.
• 13:29
  Mary: And I think you were not even aware yet that it was there, but I'm wondering how much of those connections and relationships, how important were all of those things in helping you to heal?
• 13:43
  Shannon: Um, so important.
• 13:44
  Shannon: So important to be, even when you can't see yourself to be seen, I think is really important.
• 13:52
  Shannon: And I know that with the support and the love that everybody gave me in in such a constant way, it gave me hope that I was somebody worth talking to, hope that I was somebody, you know, worth repairing.
• 14:09
  Shannon: Like it reminded me who I was, even though I couldn't remember who I was, it reminded me who I was.
• 14:14
  Shannon: And and that was super helpful for me.
• 14:17
  Shannon: Um they and the and their patience, you know, some some people didn't have as much patience as others and have not stayed in my life, and that's okay too.
• 14:28
  Shannon: Um, but the patience that somebody can have for your changes and your difficulties is to me the strength within a friendship or a relationship of any sort.
• 14:43
  Shannon: Like the people who truly stuck around past my hospital stay, past my, you know, being able to walk again, those people, they haven't gone anywhere.
• 14:56
  Shannon: They're accepting the new me the way I come.
• 14:59
  Shannon: And they see, they see the consistency of the old me in there, but they really have this kindness about this new me, because that's it's a new friend that they're meeting that they're meeting as well, especially some of my best friends.
• 15:11
  Shannon: Like those were some, I'm I know for them, some very difficult times to see somebody that you care for so much in so much pain and in so much anguish.
• 15:21
  Shannon: And then you keep showing up for them in a way that allows them to see themselves again because that connection again.
• 15:31
  Shannon: It's it's a beautiful thing.
• 15:34
  Shannon: It and it was.
• 15:35
  Shannon: Um Yeah, and I'm not sure if there's any more explanation outside of that, but it was important.
• 15:44
  Mary: Yeah.
• 15:44
  Mary: Well, and I think what struck me was knowing that you couldn't see those pictures yet.
• 15:49
  Mary: And they were they uh seemed to be pictures of you with important people in your life or at in important times of your life.
• 15:55
  Mary: What struck me was the faith people had in your recovery by putting pictures up that you couldn't even see to create that feeling and that positivity was that was amazing for me to see that.
• 16:10
  Shannon: And it was, it was also what I think what I've been told as well, it was so inspiring for the nurses and the doctors because they're in there every day dealing with these, let's just say, very broken people in different ways.
• 16:23
  Shannon: And to to be able to kind of get a visualization of who they're supporting and who they're helping, I think helps them as well.
• 16:31
  Shannon: It connects them and it it helped them realize who was lying in that bed that was in a coma that they don't know, you know.
• 16:38
  Shannon: And I think again, um, the images help the connections for everybody.
• 16:44
  Shannon: Um, and and oh, I don't remember any of them.
• 16:47
  Shannon: I've seen pictures, I mean, I've seen plenty of of images, um, but I don't remember those being there.
• 16:53
  Shannon: But I know that even again, somebody that walked in the door to like hold my hand while I was in a coma was there and it they had something interesting other than to other than just me and my coma to look at.
• 17:06
  Shannon: They had, you know, my travels, my this, my that.
• 17:10
  Shannon: And, you know, it kept them capable of seeing something other than just the hospital bed, you know, and and the and the broken me.
• 17:20
  Shannon: Because it was, again, it was if if if you look at my book at the back, there's some very significant photos back there when I was, you know, everything was tied up, looped up at the hospital.
• 17:34
  Shannon: And um it was it was a lot.
• 17:36
  Shannon: And it and it it also inspires me because when I look back at that, even though I don't remember it, it reminds me of all my progress.
• 17:44
  Shannon: So sometimes it's just seeing your progress, and I have to be reminded about okay, Shannon, be kinder to yourself.
• 17:50
  Shannon: Look all that you've done so many baby steps to get here, and then remember where you were, buddy.
• 17:56
  Shannon: Yeah.
• 17:58
  Mary: So do you still have residual pain?
• 18:01
  Mary: Are there things you still have to deal with pain-wise?
• 18:04
  Shannon: Yeah, I do.
• 18:05
  Shannon: Um, so from not from what I can remember, but from my body pain, my I think I fell all on my right side.
• 18:12
  Shannon: And I still have um, I do my gentle yoga is to get, you know, I took it took a few surgeries and um it's still I can still feel because they they never thought this would work, but I can still feel um a little bit of pain in my wrist, in this one specifically, in my ankle and in my knee.
• 18:32
  Shannon: And it's not anywhere as close as what it used to.
• 18:36
  Shannon: It's like the pain kept lightening, like it went from like 80% pain to, you know, now I'm at like 10% pain in certain areas of my body.
• 18:44
  Shannon: But it it that doesn't go away, at least for me at this point.
• 18:47
  Shannon: And I keep working on doing my gentle yoga classes and taking my walks and building strength again because being put in that three months, no more than three months of not being able to do to move anything, do anything, and then all your muscles like, you know, come down to nothing.
• 19:03
  Shannon: Um, and so to rebuild that and to continue to rebuild it.
• 19:06
  Shannon: And I even have moments where I'm like, oh, yeah, you use your right side, your left side a little bit more than your right still.
• 19:13
  Shannon: So there's a balance issue that I'm working on now because I used the one side so much in my recovery that now my body and my brain is not, it doesn't remember to use both sides.
• 19:25
  Shannon: It's like you got to balance that out.
• 19:27
  Shannon: Um yeah.
• 19:28
  Shannon: And so it's still it's and then the eye.
• 19:32
  Shannon: Um I've I've had one surgery um and they've kind of pulled it over as far as they could.
• 19:38
  Shannon: So it's a little better place, but I still have double vision because I have, you know, I have to sit in a circle certain angle not to see double vision.
• 19:46
  Shannon: Um, and with my brain recovery, I kind of put my eye on the back burner because I just wanted to keep building my brain.
• 19:54
  Shannon: Yeah.
• 19:54
  Shannon: And so covering my eye, and I did, you know, I I've done the baby steps of trying to get more strength back, but I'm I'm now becoming comfortable with I'm an eye patch girl.
• 20:05
  Mary: Well, and you're owning it, right?
• 20:06
  Mary: You it's you're signature, your signature patch now.
• 20:10
  Shannon: Yeah, I am, I am.
• 20:11
  Shannon: And I and I love it.
• 20:13
  Shannon: It's it is the new me.
• 20:14
  Shannon: It and I always say to people, it's like my new pair of shoes.
• 20:17
  Shannon: I have to like what I see when I look down at my shoes, and when I look at my eye patch, like I I that's something that I visually like to like when I look in the mirror.
• 20:25
  Shannon: And it took me quite a while to get comfortable.
• 20:29
  Shannon: And I think we all get this way, whether it be post-having a baby or you know, age or whatever, things change and you have to get comfortable with the changes.
• 20:39
  Shannon: And that to me is a part of why I wanted to share on both sides what somebody would be going through or could be going through, and how people can help others through trauma is the main reason why I think that the book is is going to help others.
• 20:58
  Shannon: My book is going to help others is to see how they can step into their miracle.
• 21:02
  Shannon: Um, because sometimes we get a little lost and we need to walk down the roads in our life a little differently.
• 21:10
  Shannon: You know?
• 21:12
  Mary: Yeah.
• 21:12
  Mary: Well, and the one thing struck me that you said, because I hear this often, that there are people who stuck around and there are people that fell away.
• 21:20
  Mary: And that seems to be a theme often when we go through something really hard and we realize I need to stand in the present.
• 21:29
  Mary: I need to just try to be the best person I can.
• 21:32
  Mary: And there's no more time anymore or energy or space to allow something that maybe doesn't feel congruent.
• 21:42
  Mary: And so I'm just curious that the people that are no longer in your life, are you surprised about who they ended up being?
• 21:52
  Shannon: I think mostly no.
• 21:54
  Shannon: I have one specific friend that I miss a lot that I used to ride with.
• 21:59
  Shannon: And it's not like she's completely gone out of my life, but she has faded away quite a bit.
• 22:06
  Shannon: And I miss her.
• 22:07
  Shannon: And I I'm still trying to not take it personally.
• 22:12
  Shannon: And that's the best thing to do.
• 22:14
  Shannon: And I don't, I really don't anymore, but it still makes me sad that she's not a part of my my weekly life, you know.
• 22:22
  Shannon: And that's probably that that's one of the harder ones.
• 22:26
  Shannon: Um, but I also understand it.
• 22:29
  Shannon: I mean, we used to ride every Sunday together, and I think there's a level of confronting something that you don't want to have happen to you in a way.
• 22:38
  Shannon: Um, there has to be some sorrow that comes from her when she looks at me now because it's something that she still loves and does.
• 22:46
  Shannon: And there's, you know, it's it's it's trying to put yourself and surround yourself with people that are kind of more balanced with where you are in life.
• 22:56
  Shannon: And we're a little out of balance now.
• 22:59
  Shannon: I don't know how long that will be.
• 23:01
  Shannon: It might be for the rest of my life.
• 23:02
  Shannon: I don't know, but we'll see.
• 23:03
  Shannon: We'll see how.
• 23:05
  Mary: Well, you mentioned again before I hit record, you talked about Shannon 2.0.
• 23:10
  Mary: So I'm curious what is different?
• 23:12
  Mary: What do you feel like your strengths are now that you may not have even realized pre- so many.
• 23:19
  Shannon: Yeah.
• 23:19
  Shannon: So many.
• 23:20
  Shannon: Um, so yes, I had to come around to the place where I try I had to mentally understand that I was rebirthed in a way.
• 23:31
  Shannon: And the Shannon 1.0 was very different than the Shannon 2.0.
• 23:36
  Shannon: And the Shannon 2.0 learned how to be vulnerable and not make it in her own mind think it's needy.
• 23:46
  Shannon: Because I think I was very afraid of being too vulnerable because I thought it would be broken in other ways otherwise.
• 23:53
  Shannon: And so I, you know, I would I would do my best at caring for others, but my self-care was kind of second tier.
• 24:02
  Shannon: And that doesn't help anybody because if you're not taking care of yourself as much as you possibly can, how can you, how can you help care for others?
• 24:11
  Shannon: And so I think that was the biggest lesson is to be vulnerable and to ask for help um empowered me to get better.
• 24:20
  Shannon: And if you would have asked Shannon 1.0, that that would not have been what she would have said.
• 24:26
  Shannon: So living present in a present moment is empowering as well.
• 24:31
  Shannon: I say that to many people and the words sound familiar, but I think when people try to live in each moment and not toast what's happened, it's hard to do.
• 24:44
  Shannon: Yeah.
• 24:44
  Shannon: You know, and I'd say that if you can find strength in each moment when you're feeling sorrow about anything or something means seems to be difficult, I came up with a very simple because brain recovery, yes, no, and maybe.
• 25:00
  Shannon: And I would be, I'd answer myself, is this the right thing to do?
• 25:04
  Shannon: Yes, no, or maybe.
• 25:05
  Shannon: Yes is yes, no is no, and maybe always was not.
• 25:09
  Shannon: Let's put that, let's put that aside for now.
• 25:11
  Shannon: It can come back later.
• 25:12
  Shannon: And it's okay for it to be a maybe and uh it and it to be asked again later, but not not at this moment.
• 25:20
  Shannon: You don't have an answer this moment, that's okay too.
• 25:22
  Shannon: And I kept having to remind myself it's okay not to have an answer.
• 25:25
  Shannon: So the yes, no, maybe was was huge as well in my recovery, and it still is.
• 25:30
  Shannon: I, you know, I'm relearning to live with my daughter.
• 25:34
  Shannon: Um, she's graduated from college, which is a beautiful thing, but you know, I'm learning the ins and outs of having an adult in my house.
• 25:43
  Shannon: Yeah.
• 25:44
  Shannon: You know.
• 25:45
  Shannon: Um, and so yeah, I'd say that there have been many gains.
• 25:50
  Shannon: There were plenty of losses.
• 25:51
  Shannon: It's not like it's been difficult.
• 25:53
  Shannon: And I don't know if we talked about this, but a year and a half after my accident, and this is something I sometimes forget and I can't, is I was diagnosed with breast cancer.
• 26:02
  Mary: Yes, that that was I was get I was getting.
• 26:04
  Mary: We did it, we did not even, it's like the I for I think it's called a bobo doll where you punch it and it goes back and comes back up.
• 26:12
  Mary: I feel like that was you, like okay, now this on top of, yeah, on top of everything else.
• 26:18
  Shannon: And when it happened, I remember getting the call and laughing and thinking it was funny because I thought I had been through so much.
• 26:26
  Shannon: If my life was gonna be taken, it would have been taken.
• 26:29
  Shannon: And I I personally had to learn that no matter what happens to us, that doesn't mean more trauma can't.
• 26:37
  Shannon: So don't try to compare where you sit today with where you can be tomorrow.
• 26:41
  Shannon: Just sit with today.
• 26:43
  Shannon: And I'm gonna do the best at my cancer today, or I'm gonna do the best at my brain today.
• 26:47
  Shannon: And know that there's not an ebb and flow with traumatic things happening.
• 26:53
  Shannon: They can come after more trauma.
• 26:55
  Shannon: So until you can stay present in the moment and not sit and worry, then you know, that's strength that you can build.
• 27:05
  Mary: And I think we like to know what's happening or we like to have an answer.
• 27:08
  Mary: We like things to be black and white.
• 27:10
  Mary: So when you add the maybe in there, that's important because your entire life for that time was uncertainty.
• 27:17
  Mary: And when you talk about being present, typically it's the lack of certainty that most people have trouble with because when we're in that liminal space, when we don't know like what is gonna happen, and for you, it's pretty much your life deconstructed itself to the point that you could not remember important parts of it and you had to reconstruct it.
• 27:41
  Mary: And I think I think about you know, you have this elaborate life of Legos, and someone takes it apart, and the next morning you're looking at all these and you're like, well, I kind of remember how they went together, but let me create something new.
• 27:54
  Mary: And so I think being able to embrace that regardless of where we are in life is so important because we don't need to have, and this is where I sort of where I started the whole episode.
• 28:06
  Mary: There's always someone better off and worse off than you are.
• 28:09
  Mary: So we don't always need these huge things.
• 28:11
  Mary: It was almost again like life was like, okay, I smacked you on one side of the head.
• 28:16
  Mary: Let me smack you on the other side now with cancer, right?
• 28:18
  Mary: I needed to be really ended and reawakened.
• 28:23
  Mary: Yeah.
• 28:23
  Mary: When when you can, there's every argument to say, okay, I think that you've been awakened.
• 28:28
  Mary: But I think, you know, being able to live that each day before you have to is really a key, but we struggle so much with it.
• 28:38
  Shannon: I think it's hard for us to see ourselves clearly.
• 28:40
  Shannon: I think we I think we spend a lot of time with the ins and outs of how we look and who we are, and not just being present with the the beauty of who we are.
• 28:49
  Shannon: And if we can do that more and more, that's the kindness we can show to ourselves.
• 28:54
  Shannon: And that makes us to me, it makes me a better person.
• 28:57
  Shannon: And I hope it helps others learn how to see themselves more clearly and and not try to sort it all out.
• 29:04
  Shannon: Yeah.
• 29:04
  Mary: Yeah.
• 29:05
  Shannon: It's okay not to know.
• 29:07
  Mary: Yeah, because we can't.
• 29:08
  Mary: I mean, I think that's the thing.
• 29:09
  Mary: It's it's just sort of owning that.
• 29:11
  Mary: So I want to talk in a minute more about what people can get from your book and what you what you shared in there.
• 29:17
  Mary: Um, but how are you today?
• 29:19
  Mary: Like, are you still doing design work?
• 29:21
  Mary: What are you what is part of your life right now?
• 29:24
  Shannon: So I'm not doing my interior design work.
• 29:27
  Shannon: I I do it, I gift it to anybody who wants it, honestly, because I still have it in me and I I know that I can look at a space and make all the decisions, and I still have the capability of doing what I used to do.
• 29:38
  Shannon: Um, my limitation with short term memory is to me a little too messy at this point to do the work that I used to do.
• 29:48
  Shannon: And not saying that I couldn't in my future, but if I if I needed to, but right now I'm just focusing still on my self care, and I've brought this new career into my life, and I'm excited about it, and I know.
• 29:59
  Shannon: That I have so much to share with others.
• 30:03
  Shannon: Like that's now my full-time job is to help others and to show guidance of how we can take care of ourselves in a better way and see ourselves clearer and recover from whatever it is we've been through.
• 30:18
  Shannon: If we would like to take a step at a time, we can.
• 30:21
  Shannon: And um yeah.
• 30:24
  Mary: So remind us the title of your book, a little bit about what's in it and what other things, how do you right now reach out to help people or how can they reach you?
• 30:33
  Shannon: Got it, got it.
• 30:34
  Shannon: So my book is Step into Your Miracle.
• 30:37
  Shannon: And I have a beautiful website, um, step in your miracle.com.
• 30:41
  Shannon: They created this gorgeous website for me.
• 30:44
  Shannon: And there it tells more of my story, and it also is a place where you can buy my book.
• 30:49
  Shannon: And you can buy it Amazon and Barnes and Noble, and there's all kinds of places now you can get it, which is great.
• 30:55
  Shannon: Um, my publicist was phenomenal at getting it, getting it out in the market the way it's supposed to try to be seen a little bit more.
• 31:02
  Shannon: Um, and so yeah, so please take a peek at my website and take a peek at my book.
• 31:08
  Shannon: Um we're going into the holidays.
• 31:09
  Shannon: I think it's a great Christmas gift.
• 31:11
  Shannon: You know, um, and so and again, it's helpful, I think, for any sort of trauma.
• 31:20
  Shannon: And it trauma is a big some for some people a big word.
• 31:22
  Shannon: And sometimes when I say trauma, I mean, you know, a breakup, a um a loss of any sort.
• 31:30
  Shannon: It can be whatever your changes and the thing that's difficult for you is is to me, hopefully, steps as to how you can get through it and find your way out.
• 31:42
  Shannon: That's and that's the that was always my goal.
• 31:44
  Shannon: And so that was one of the things I want to make sure that people gain from it as well.
• 31:50
  Mary: I will link everything in the show notes.
• 31:52
  Mary: So, because I know a lot of times people are driving and they hear it, and they're like, I'm never gonna remember that.
• 31:56
  Mary: So it'll be that'll all be in the show notes.
• 31:58
  Shannon: This has been fabulous.
• 32:00
  Mary: Um, I could go on and on about all kinds of stuff, but well, and I can tell, you know, again, if people are not seeing any of the shorts from this video-wise, hearing what you went through and seeing you, it seems like a miracle.
• 32:16
  Mary: And I just appreciate so much the grace and the positivity that you have brought to what's happened to you and the fact that you're willing to share it because I'm sure there were hard times.
• 32:29
  Mary: There have to be.
• 32:30
  Mary: It's never a linear recovery from anything.
• 32:33
  Shannon: It's it's not, and there were, and but I share that all in my book as well.
• 32:36
  Shannon: I was comfortable and wanting to make sure that I spoke volumes about all the good and bad days and how what I could do and couldn't do.
• 32:46
  Shannon: And that I think is a is again a part of connecting to others.
• 32:50
  Shannon: Like it's nothing's ever that clean as you're saying.
• 32:53
  Shannon: Like it's it's it's messy.
• 32:55
  Shannon: And the book, you see the messiness.
• 32:58
  Mary: Well, yeah.
• 32:59
  Mary: Yeah.
• 32:59
  Mary: And again, when you when I looked at your pictures and saw you in the hospital, and then I saw the really the radiance in your smile now.
• 33:09
  Mary: I like especially you were there was a picture of you standing with the nurses that you know, and first of all, loved your sweater, but you just looked so radiant.
• 33:20
  Mary: And I think I want people to recognize that as low as you might feel sometimes, that there's always a story, there's always someone that can inspire you to dig deep.
• 33:35
  Mary: And it's funny because it's so simple, but it's not easy.
• 33:39
  Mary: As with many things, the simplicity is just try to live every minute.
• 33:43
  Mary: That's just not easy.
• 33:45
  Shannon: It's not.
• 33:46
  Shannon: Yeah.
• 33:47
  Shannon: And and within that, it's it's the idea that you know, try not to control everything.
• 33:52
  Shannon: Like you think you make the right decision and you control the the the outcome.
• 33:56
  Shannon: Well, sometimes things get a little messy and you're out, you don't have control over it.
• 34:00
  Shannon: And that's life too, and that teaches you and makes you stronger and uh creates um a life that you couldn't have imagined for yourself.
• 34:11
  Mary: Well, and I think for you, the key, and this really is a key with a lot of things that you were willing to pivot because we can so mourn what we've lost.
• 34:22
  Mary: And you obviously had a career where you did something not only that you loved, but you were good at it, doing it in a space where you probably interacted with some people's names we might know, and you you lost me.
• 34:36
  Mary: You lost.
• 34:37
  Mary: And so I think there could be a path where someone would have had what happened to you happen to them, and all they want to do is look at the past and everything they lost.
• 34:48
  Mary: And you are looking forward.
• 34:50
  Mary: That's part of who you are.
• 34:52
  Mary: You know, as you said, it's like all of those experiences are still part of your life, but now you going in a different direction and being willing to take a path that you never imagined, that is really the key to everything.
• 35:08
  Shannon: I agree.
• 35:09
  Shannon: Yeah, those are beautiful words you just said.
• 35:14
  Mary: It's very inspiring.
• 35:15
  Mary: So, again, I so appreciate you being here.
• 35:18
  Mary: Thank you for sharing your story.
• 35:20
  Mary: Thank you for having me.
• 35:21
  Mary: You're welcome.
• 35:22
  Mary: Thanks, everybody.
• 35:23
  Mary: Yeah, and thanks everybody for listening.
• 35:25
  Mary: I truly want to hear from you.
• 35:27
  Mary: So I have an email in my show notes, NSV Podcast, no shrinking violets, nsvpodcast at gmail.com to tell me that this episode or any episode moved you, or if you want to share a topic that you would like me to cover in the future.
• 35:42
  Mary: And until next time, go out into the world and be the amazing, resilient, vibrant violet that you are.