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Breathing Together: The Power of Co-Regulation with Frankie Socash · The Spiritual Parent: Mindful Tools for Raising Spiritual and Conscious Kids

• 0:00
  Frankie Socash: And seeing it as this opportunity for healing, rather than oh, I just need to make this stop, because trying to make it stop is only going to perpetuate it.
• 0:10
  Frankie Socash: And this makes me think about the co-regulation.
• 0:15
  Frankie Socash: What if we were to co-regulate with the triggers and, rather than trying to encourage someone or a child, just breathe?
• 0:26
  Frankie Socash: What if we just sat there with them and were breathing?
• 0:29
  Frankie Socash: Because if children do, if they model what we do rather than what we say, and we were just there and very present, we didn't even have to say anything.
• 0:37
  Frankie Socash: We could just be breathing, making it audible, whatever, and just sit there and just breathe.
• 0:42
  Frankie Socash: And it takes a little bit, but eventually their system is going to link up with that system.
• 0:49
  Carrie Lingenfelter: Hi Conscious Parents.
• 0:49
  Carrie Lingenfelter: It's Keri here and I am here with a little info about raising our mindful kids.
• 0:54
  Carrie Lingenfelter: I've got some tips and tricks about breaking free of the box and becoming who you are and teaching your kids how to do that along the way.
• 1:01
  Carrie Lingenfelter: Join us Hi there and welcome back.
• 1:04
  Carrie Lingenfelter: I'm so excited to connect with you all.
• 1:07
  Carrie Lingenfelter: Today.
• 1:07
  Carrie Lingenfelter: I have a wonderful special guest, frankie Sokhash, that I'm so excited to connect with.
• 1:14
  Carrie Lingenfelter: I've been following her on Instagram and, if you don't, you should check her out in the show notes because she's amazing and she's helped me so much with my motherhood journey and my spiritual awakening that I've been feeling so.
• 1:27
  Carrie Lingenfelter: Frankie is a somatic guide and mentor, helping women to birth their creative gifts, bring their medicine to the world and embrace the full spectrum of themselves and their emotions while doing so.
• 1:38
  Carrie Lingenfelter: And that pretty much describes my year.
• 1:41
  Carrie Lingenfelter: My word for this year has been passion for 2024.
• 1:46
  Carrie Lingenfelter: And I feel like I started out with passion and just last year and this year just had this huge spiritual awakening through motherhood and connection and it's been amazing.
• 1:58
  Carrie Lingenfelter: I was actually just telling my husband yesterday how this era has calmed my brain down and now I can hear my heart and it really just feels this powerful love toward him.
• 2:12
  Carrie Lingenfelter: So it's just this reconnection that I've been having with myself, with my husband, a little bit with my parents I feel like that's going on and then my kids.
• 2:20
  Carrie Lingenfelter: So I love what you're doing for others.
• 2:23
  Frankie Socash: Yeah, that's beautiful.
• 2:24
  Frankie Socash: Thank you, Carrie.
• 2:25
  Frankie Socash: Thank you for having me, thank you for inviting me to your podcast and onto this platform, super inspired by what you're doing and the conscious parenting and spreading the word and giving parents tools to be able to work through whatever they need to work through in order to be able to bring more of that consciousness and more of that awareness into our daily lives, because that's like the bread and butter of humanity and of reality.
• 2:50
  Frankie Socash: Right, it's?
• 2:51
  Frankie Socash: like our foundation of what we've created here on earth and what we're going to continue to be able to create on earth.
• 2:57
  Frankie Socash: So, yeah, I'm super stoked to be here and I had a word for this year and I think it was devotion or dedication, one of those D words.
• 3:06
  Frankie Socash: And yeah, my year has also been just like really filled with a lot of relationship building and rediscovering my relationship to my mom, to my body, to my future children and my partner.
• 3:19
  Frankie Socash: And, yeah, it must be something in the air.
• 3:21
  Carrie Lingenfelter: I love it.
• 3:22
  Carrie Lingenfelter: Yeah, it must be something with our charts or what we're meant to work through in this era.
• 3:28
  Carrie Lingenfelter: It's so powerful and it's interesting that you were talking about connection with your parents and I think for me you had mentioned beforehand.
• 3:41
  Carrie Lingenfelter: I was reading you had talked about your tribe and how we were not meant to raise children alone and in a vulnerable piece of myself, I have been feeling so lonely in parenting.
• 3:54
  Carrie Lingenfelter: That's why I started Heart to Heart.
• 3:56
  Carrie Lingenfelter: Parents was.
• 3:56
  Carrie Lingenfelter: I felt like I was the only one raising these gifted, spirited, highly sensitive kids, and it's been hard for my husband and I to find our tribe because we feel like we're so different than others.
• 4:13
  Carrie Lingenfelter: When, as I'm starting this, I'm like oh my gosh, there are so many people like this.
• 4:17
  Carrie Lingenfelter: Do you have any pieces that you would say about, maybe like calling in our tribe, finding people that accept us?
• 4:26
  Carrie Lingenfelter: For us, I think this.
• 4:28
  Carrie Lingenfelter: It was like this huge movement that my husband and I discovered.
• 4:32
  Carrie Lingenfelter: We had thought we had to be this box version of what parents should look like, especially after the pandemic, when we were holed up with our kids.
• 4:42
  Carrie Lingenfelter: We loved that piece because we really got to connect with our kids, but when we went out into the world.
• 4:46
  Carrie Lingenfelter: We were like we're going to make friends and we're going to discover it's going to be wonderful We've been locked in, and so we almost became this box version of what other parents think that we should look like and we weren't letting our true selves out.
• 5:00
  Carrie Lingenfelter: And then, once we did, it was like everybody disappeared.
• 5:03
  Carrie Lingenfelter: But I think it was because we needed to start new, and we ended 2023 at this version of peace, which was both of our word for the year.
• 5:13
  Carrie Lingenfelter: It was really funny we ended up with the same word, but we felt peaceful at the end.
• 5:17
  Carrie Lingenfelter: We changed our kid's school, we let go of old relationships and now we're at this era where we're trying to bring in and we have a really hard time connecting with others and finding other people in our parenting journey.
• 5:30
  Frankie Socash: Yeah, I feel that there was a time when I was dating someone and surrounded by a lot of people who I just didn't feel like I really truly resonated.
• 5:41
  Frankie Socash: I was like like my spirituality was in the closet still, like I hadn't really fully embraced who I knew.
• 5:48
  Frankie Socash: I was on the inside and I didn't feel confident.
• 5:52
  Frankie Socash: I didn't feel comfortable talking about the things that I really wanted to talk about and it just it felt like I was living this kind of secret life.
• 5:59
  Frankie Socash: And I think this is like a really important part in everyone's journey.
• 6:04
  Frankie Socash: Right Is being able to acknowledge I'm no longer really in resonance with who I've become and some of the people that I'm surrounded by.
• 6:13
  Frankie Socash: And then there's like that leap of faith right, like in the hero's journey, there's always this kind of like this leap that we have to take off the cliff and hope and pray.
• 6:23
  Frankie Socash: And sometimes it comes with a lot of difficulties and challenges and I felt like after I had moved on from this group of people that I had grown so close to and don't get me wrong like I still love them.
• 6:34
  Frankie Socash: They played a huge role in my becoming, but it came to a point where it wasn't serving and it was almost like the pain of sticking around became so overwhelming to me that I had to, and then it was a while of just feeling like loneliness and I think that is part of the process.
• 6:53
  Frankie Socash: But continuing to walk the path and continuing to walk in this way, where I know that I'm true to who I am on the inside, I know that I'm true to who I am at the heart right Of my heart and soul, and I do believe that where I'm going and where I'm headed there are people, and continuing to dedicate ourselves to that path, it's like dedicating ourselves to something that we can't quite see yet or we can't quite grasp it yet, and it's like being able to connect to that and just continuing to walk the path.
• 7:23
  Frankie Socash: That is what attracts the tribe, that's what attracts the people that we're looking for or that we know are out there, and the people who are also doing the same thing.
• 7:34
  Frankie Socash: It's magnetic when we can overcome who we thought we were and put ourselves in those situations where we have to just burn in our own fire of passion and desire.
• 7:41
  Frankie Socash: This is who I am and this is who I'm not willing to be anymore, and with love and compassion to that version and who we were and the people who were around us, and being willing to take that leap and it's not easy, it's scary, but I think that played a really big role as being willing to go through that piece of I'm not being totally true to who I know I am and then being willing to be lonely and learn through the loneliness, right, because what is loneliness besides maybe not really fully connecting with who we really are and like the world all around us, right?
• 8:28
  Carrie Lingenfelter: are and like the world all around us, right?
• 8:29
  Carrie Lingenfelter: Yeah, that's beautiful and it's interesting because I think about when I was a child.
• 8:31
  Carrie Lingenfelter: All of our kids are so conscious, my kids are very conscious, and I was a very conscious child and I would connect, or I would attempt to connect, heart to heart with all of my friends.
• 8:41
  Carrie Lingenfelter: I would be the best friend, and I wouldn't always receive the same version that I was putting out.
• 8:48
  Carrie Lingenfelter: And so I feel as an adult, I thought, oh, I have to mask or give this version of me to be a friend.
• 8:58
  Carrie Lingenfelter: And then finally, as I came into my own this past year or two, it's oh, no, I need this other, I need to be me and I need to be a connected friend.
• 9:09
  Carrie Lingenfelter: So I'm thinking in my mind my kids have to go through that as well, because they I can see my kids and they are very conscious in their friendships, they are very devoted friends.
• 9:20
  Carrie Lingenfelter: So I guess it's probably something that they'll have to go through at some point.
• 9:24
  Frankie Socash: Yeah, that's an interesting one, because I believe that we all have our own journey right.
• 9:29
  Frankie Socash: We all come here and we're here to just we have to learn, and there are some things that we can't really tell children.
• 9:37
  Frankie Socash: They have to figure it out on their own.
• 9:40
  Frankie Socash: But then how much of it is like how can we teach them some of the things that we've gone through?
• 9:46
  Frankie Socash: Right, and maybe encouraging them to still keep their heart open when the world around them is encouraging them to close up their heart because it's too much or because people don't know how to handle it?
• 9:58
  Frankie Socash: And because I know that story, like what you were just saying about having this big, open heart and feeling like we had to adjust, because I think it's I sit like, on one hand, I feel like it's really rare to read, to meet people with that big, wide, open heart, but then, at the same time, I feel like it's just perspective and being willing to like look around and see, and also like how can we teach our children to still remain open, regardless of what other children may be encouraging them or teaching them or what their teachers may be teaching them even, and I think this all really comes back to just emotional intelligence being able to understand emotions and being able to understand triggers and being able to understand projections right, like the way someone responds to how I love them.
• 10:48
  Frankie Socash: It doesn't say anything about me.
• 10:49
  Frankie Socash: So if I'm big, wide, open hearted and someone can't handle it, or they get mad or they attack me, or and then I want to shut down, it's my responsibility to to not shut down or to move through it right, or to discover what is it about it that's actually making me want to shut down, because it's not the other person.
• 11:10
  Frankie Socash: And so being able to untangle the mess that I think a lot of humans have found themselves in this kind of like emotional trigger dynamic relationships.
• 11:21
  Frankie Socash: Everything is so conditional.
• 11:22
  Frankie Socash: I need you to do this so I can be this.
• 11:24
  Frankie Socash: And yeah, just, I think the emotional intelligence is really important, and especially for children.
• 11:31
  Carrie Lingenfelter: Yeah, yeah, there's so much of.
• 11:33
  Carrie Lingenfelter: I think we're really realizing and recognizing these pieces and teaching them the emotional intelligence pieces my two a six-year-old daughter and nine-year-old son and we moved them to a social emotional focus school and there's pieces of it that really helped them with those emotional intelligence and also empowering them in their sensitivity, in their big, open hearts, empowering them to understand how they connect with others, and it's been really wonderful for my two kids.
• 12:11
  Carrie Lingenfelter: But, yeah, I love that.
• 12:12
  Carrie Lingenfelter: I think, as we're working to teach them about their emotional responses, that's a huge one that I've been doing as a mom and this is a little bit off topic, but I was thinking yesterday.
• 12:24
  Carrie Lingenfelter: I was thinking about how I teach my kids.
• 12:27
  Carrie Lingenfelter: We've been working lately.
• 12:30
  Carrie Lingenfelter: My kids will have a sensory response to the world around them as emotional, highly sensitive, empath kids.
• 12:37
  Carrie Lingenfelter: There can be triggers or things that feel, and it's oftentimes like a sensory trigger or something that's just overwhelming.
• 12:44
  Carrie Lingenfelter: When they're sick, when they're tired, it's even worse.
• 12:47
  Carrie Lingenfelter: So they will erupt and in that moment they'll say things that they don't mean to trigger my husband and I, because they've learned, they're very smart, so they've learned what these triggers are and for me, one of my triggers is if my son hits my daughter, it's a huge mama bear trigger.
• 13:04
  Carrie Lingenfelter: Or if he hits my husband, oftentimes he doesn't hit as much, but so he'll use words to hit.
• 13:10
  Carrie Lingenfelter: Now that's where he's learned Thinking about these.
• 13:13
  Carrie Lingenfelter: So that's one thing is talking about those triggers I would love to come back to that for moms, but also I've been talking to my kids about that is a response, that's your physical response to what's going on in your system and that is not who your true spirit and soul and person is.
• 13:32
  Carrie Lingenfelter: You have a beautiful spirit, you have a beautiful soul.
• 13:35
  Carrie Lingenfelter: I see it and I know how you love people and you take care of others, and that's your response.
• 13:41
  Carrie Lingenfelter: Do you want to name it?
• 13:42
  Carrie Lingenfelter: Let's name it like silly monster or let's name it something, because I want you to not identify with your response.
• 13:46
  Carrie Lingenfelter: Do you want to name it?
• 13:46
  Carrie Lingenfelter: Let's name it like silly monster or let's name it something, because I want you to not identify with that response.
• 13:49
  Carrie Lingenfelter: I want you to identify with who you truly are, and I've noticed that my kids really love that and they take to it and I hear less I'm a bad kid or what I did was makes me a bad person.
• 14:02
  Carrie Lingenfelter: It's really interesting.
• 14:03
  Carrie Lingenfelter: My son will now say I'm feeling triggered.
• 14:06
  Carrie Lingenfelter: Can we turn on the audio book to help me calm myself down?
• 14:09
  Carrie Lingenfelter: Or I'm going to go play with my Legos because I'm feeling triggered and I love the way kids are using these tools and they know how to identify it.
• 14:17
  Carrie Lingenfelter: So I'm going to share that piece of what we've been working on.
• 14:21
  Frankie Socash: Oh, that's so cool.
• 14:22
  Frankie Socash: I love it.
• 14:22
  Frankie Socash: On.
• 14:23
  Carrie Lingenfelter: Oh that's so cool.
• 14:23
  Carrie Lingenfelter: I love it.
• 14:24
  Carrie Lingenfelter: Yeah, and just identifying with that moment and that energy right, it's like this buildup of energy and this explosion and like they got to get it out.
• 14:34
  Carrie Lingenfelter: And sometimes, like we use a lot of our occupational therapists have taught us tools of bringing them into their body again.
• 14:41
  Carrie Lingenfelter: Right, Grounding them like hitting them with a pillow we have pillow fights or like throwing them onto the bed in a soft manner to just help them like reset.
• 14:48
  Carrie Lingenfelter: But yeah, not identifying those moments as who their soul and their person is.
• 14:54
  Frankie Socash: Yeah, totally I also think like it's to be able to watch adults do it, because I'm just reflecting on when I was a child and bless, bless, bless my mother.
• 15:05
  Frankie Socash: I love her so much and she would try to tell me to do something.
• 15:09
  Frankie Socash: And it's like you don't do it.
• 15:10
  Frankie Socash: Why should I?
• 15:11
  Frankie Socash: So it's very it's children watch.
• 15:16
  Frankie Socash: They're watching.
• 15:17
  Frankie Socash: They're not doing what they're told, they're doing what is modeled to them, which I think is really fascinating.
• 15:27
  Frankie Socash: I have a story that, while you were talking, was coming up and I want to share it, and it feels really vulnerable to share this story.
• 15:35
  Frankie Socash: It's about me and my partner.
• 15:37
  Frankie Socash: He I don't even know, I can't even remember what the thing was, but I kept doing this thing and he'd be like stop, and I'm like still doing it.
• 15:47
  Frankie Socash: A little kid, I don't even know, I can't even remember what the thing was, but I kept doing this thing and he'd be like stop, and I'm like still doing it.
• 15:50
  Frankie Socash: He's a little kid.
• 15:51
  Frankie Socash: This is like a kind of a little kid dynamic and he's just stop it, stop it.
• 15:52
  Frankie Socash: And this is over a period of time where I just kept doing this thing and kept doing this thing and I wasn't really listening to him when he said stop, like I didn't take it seriously, I didn't think it got to a point where he like started, you know, grabbing my arms and like kind of play, play, wrestling, but also wrestling, to the point where it's stop.
• 16:16
  Frankie Socash: And it got heated to the point where I, like I was getting triggered.
• 16:22
  Frankie Socash: I was like, why does it feel like it's getting to a point of violence?
• 16:26
  Frankie Socash: I didn't understand.
• 16:27
  Frankie Socash: And we had this, not necessarily a blow up, but this moment of what?
• 16:32
  Frankie Socash: What is going on?
• 16:33
  Frankie Socash: Why are like, why are you acting this way towards me?
• 16:36
  Frankie Socash: And it came to the point where it was like because I wasn't actually listening to him and hearing him when he was saying stop, please, don't do that, and I wasn't taking it seriously Like his only response was like, okay, now I need to get physical, now I need to get I'm not going to say violent, because that's a really intense word, it's not violence, he's not hitting me, he used to do Brazilian jujitsu, so he really likes to do those weird moves.
• 17:07
  Frankie Socash: But it was getting to the point where I was getting triggered.
• 17:08
  Frankie Socash: And I was getting to this place of remembering when I was a child, when I would blow up and I'd freak out and get physical and start screaming and hitting and doing whatever I needed to do in order to be heard.
• 17:19
  Frankie Socash: And it was this moment of oh my God, I can't believe that I'm doing that.
• 17:24
  Frankie Socash: Right, I'm the one creating this.
• 17:26
  Frankie Socash: I'm the one who's continuously just pushing and pushing, doing this thing and not listening to him when he's very gently and kindly saying please stop.
• 17:36
  Frankie Socash: And then it gets to this point of kind of a physical altercation and oh, wow, okay, like I just I wasn't hearing you and for, I guess, a human I don't I say human because it could be children, it could be adults, right, if our boundaries are being crossed and we're not actually being heard, like sometimes we have to take it to that level in order to be heard, because sometimes our words just aren't enough, which is unfortunate.
• 18:04
  Frankie Socash: It really it hit me.
• 18:07
  Frankie Socash: It's unfortunate that he, who is such a loving and kind and generous person and partner to be saying like, please stop.
• 18:15
  Frankie Socash: And I'm over here just still like nagging on it and egging it on, and oh wow, yeah, that that feels bad.
• 18:25
  Frankie Socash: That feels really bad on either end.
• 18:26
  Frankie Socash: Right, it felt really bad for me to be on the end of.
• 18:28
  Frankie Socash: Oh, I was the one who kept pushing it and encouraging and pushed it to that extent.
• 18:35
  Carrie Lingenfelter: Yes, yes, I think there's the idea of we all have our capacity bucket, of how much we can fill it with demands, right, and sometimes we cannot verbalize why our bucket is completely full and spilling out.
• 18:55
  Carrie Lingenfelter: And so I think of that for kids.
• 18:57
  Carrie Lingenfelter: They can't always say this is overwhelming to me, or I have way too many activities after school.
• 19:04
  Carrie Lingenfelter: I need to play outside on one day or two days a week.
• 19:07
  Carrie Lingenfelter: This is too much.
• 19:08
  Carrie Lingenfelter: So, yeah, having that connection with our kids to understand like this is what you're overreacting a lot lately, or you're feeling like very explosive lately.
• 19:20
  Carrie Lingenfelter: What is it that's triggering you?
• 19:22
  Carrie Lingenfelter: Or can we figure out how to reduce the demands on your system too?
• 19:27
  Frankie Socash: Yeah, and you may, you say that, like kids don't have the vocabulary or have the really ability to speak in that way, and I barely do, I can, barely, I'm triggered.
• 19:39
  Frankie Socash: Right now, I still get into these moods of like where I snap and I go back into these patterns and it's yeah.
• 19:47
  Frankie Socash: How do we remember in the moment, how, like, how, and if I'm modeling for other people around me and I'm going through it, how do we?
• 19:56
  Frankie Socash: How, like, how do we do it?
• 19:58
  Frankie Socash: How do we do it together?
• 19:59
  Frankie Socash: This is the question like how do we all do it together?
• 20:02
  Carrie Lingenfelter: yeah, yeah, because there's so much that the kids bring up in us that we may not have known was there, which has been like this whole parenting experience for me.
• 20:14
  Carrie Lingenfelter: I did not, but it was only in this past year where I started to realize and see it, and I think it gets easier to recognize those.
• 20:22
  Carrie Lingenfelter: Oh, this is a trigger for me from my childhood.
• 20:25
  Carrie Lingenfelter: That's why I'm feeling upset, and it gets easier over time.
• 20:29
  Carrie Lingenfelter: And then, also using your intuition too, sometimes there's I'll look back and I'll be like why did I react to such?
• 20:36
  Carrie Lingenfelter: Oh, it's this piece and I feel like I just I can hear it quicker as I practice it.
• 20:42
  Frankie Socash: Yeah, Keyword right there Practice right, yes, right.
• 20:46
  Carrie Lingenfelter: That's self-reflection and teaching our kids how to recognize those pieces and, if it is appropriate, sharing with your kids.
• 20:54
  Carrie Lingenfelter: I'm sorry, I reacted in that moment.
• 20:57
  Carrie Lingenfelter: I felt really intense in my body when you hit your sister and it kicked into me.
• 21:04
  Carrie Lingenfelter: I wanted it to stop and I don't like yelling.
• 21:07
  Carrie Lingenfelter: I'm sorry I yelled.
• 21:09
  Carrie Lingenfelter: I know you were having a response to something else and sometimes I'll work with my kid.
• 21:12
  Carrie Lingenfelter: What do you were having a response to something else, and sometimes I'll work with my kid.
• 21:14
  Carrie Lingenfelter: What do you think we could do to fix this?
• 21:16
  Carrie Lingenfelter: How do you think your body needs to learn about this so it doesn't go there next time?
• 21:21
  Carrie Lingenfelter: Yeah, so I think you had mentioned earlier.
• 21:25
  Carrie Lingenfelter: I was reading you had mentioned co-regulation and that can be really hard if we're not in that regulated state ourselves.
• 21:34
  Frankie Socash: Yeah, yeah, so that's when and, to be fair, I am current.
• 21:43
  Frankie Socash: I'm not a mother right now, so I do want to acknowledge that I'm not currently in a position where I'm raising a child, that I'm not currently in a position where I'm raising a child.
• 21:56
  Frankie Socash: I am in a position where I am working very closely to my partner and to his parents, and so it's almost like like it's different, but it's also not really like there are similarities in it, and I find that, as long as I take the time to do the work on myself and I regulate myself, and so I'm in a consistent, if I'm consistently regulated, I have more capacity for the times when there are explosions around me, when other people maybe are not regulated.
• 22:27
  Frankie Socash: It's almost like my duty to be regulated, and so I'm consistently doing the practices, I'm consistently using my tools to be able to maintain regulation, and when I have a trigger, I will deal with it right there in the moment, move it through my body and, even if I have to go, take a moment to myself really quick, run to my bedroom, do what I need to do, have a good cry, do.
• 22:56
  Frankie Socash: However, it needs to move through me, because I find that if I can do that, then I get to be that role model for those around me where they can see, oh, there's another way.
• 23:06
  Frankie Socash: Oh, I felt that I saw that emotion rise up within.
• 23:10
  Frankie Socash: I saw her get triggered, her move through it, and so it's again.
• 23:15
  Frankie Socash: It's like teaching by example and co-regulation.
• 23:19
  Frankie Socash: I used to.
• 23:20
  Frankie Socash: I worked at a daycare right up like I was in high school I think I was 15 and I worked there for years.
• 23:30
  Frankie Socash: I was in the toddler and there was a child who just very physical and he would hit whenever he'd get really upset and really mad and really angry and I would find, and I would upset, my immediate reaction during this time would be like I want to grab him, I want to yell, I want to do something, like, it's true, don't do.
• 23:51
  Frankie Socash: And I found that would almost amplify it.
• 23:55
  Frankie Socash: It would amplify the energy.
• 23:57
  Frankie Socash: And I think back to even the times when I was a child and there was violence in my home and then I would go out there and I'd be screaming and yelling and there'd be like it would just amplify it.
• 24:08
  Frankie Socash: And so being able to be that calm person is going to help another person, whether it's a child, whether it's another adult, whether it's one of our elders, whoever it is.
• 24:18
  Frankie Socash: As long as we can maintain this level of groundedness and centeredness, it's pretty profound.
• 24:26
  Frankie Socash: I also worked as a massage therapist and I found that, as long as I was feeling safe in my body, I was calm, grounded.
• 24:34
  Frankie Socash: It doesn't have to be anything crazy.
• 24:37
  Frankie Socash: There was something really profound that would happen when someone would come in.
• 24:41
  Frankie Socash: Maybe they'd been sitting in traffic, they had a rough day at work and they're feeling really frazzled, they got this pain on their neck, they're like all these things and they'd come in and they lay down and all I'd have to do is put my hands on them and then their system would then sync up with my system.
• 24:56
  Frankie Socash: It's like the way that the nervous systems communicate together, they sync up and that's like this idea of co-regulation, where it's like my system can now mingle with yours.
• 25:06
  Frankie Socash: So it's actually happening on like a nervous system level, on like a nervous system level.
• 25:15
  Frankie Socash: So it's like really it's like.
• 25:16
  Frankie Socash: Personally, I feel like it's really important for anyone, whether we're moms, sisters, daughters, granddaughters, like whatever, whoever, even men that's not even just to say it's like a woman's responsibility, but to be able to do the work that we need to do to take care of ourselves, and that work.
• 25:33
  Frankie Socash: When I say work, it's going to look different for everybody.
• 25:36
  Frankie Socash: Okay, what does it?
• 25:40
  Carrie Lingenfelter: if I was having a moment and say somebody kicked their dad and I needed to let it out and I went into the bedroom to take a minute, like my husband was taking care of the kids and I was able to leave safely with the kids being watched, but something I could do.
• 26:01
  Carrie Lingenfelter: Do you have any idea?
• 26:03
  Carrie Lingenfelter: I know it's personal if you have different triggers or such, but I'm just thinking what's like a activity or an idea, or do you?
• 26:14
  Frankie Socash: I guess I break it like yeah, it's very, it's really going to depend on everybody's capacity, especially in the moment, right, sure, but if we were to break it down to the actual moment when it happened, and let's say that this child kicked his father and it's, what is the reaction that happens within my body when I watch that and I see that, and if it's, let's say, it's like a wave of emotion and I want to react and I want to say no and I want to go and grab them, right, that's usually how it goes.
• 26:48
  Frankie Socash: Right, there's this wave of emotion that rises up and it's okay.
• 26:53
  Frankie Socash: How present can I be with that emotion?
• 26:55
  Frankie Socash: And, rather than reacting and being reactive towards it, how can I create more capacity in my body to receive the emotion, because it's valid, it's present, it's moving through me, but I don't necessarily need to let it move me, I don't need to let it control me, I don't need to let it create this kind of also reactive response Like how can I be the pattern interruption and I'm just I'll, I'll come back to, like my experience when that happens, sometimes I have to white knuckle it and but make sure that I'm breathing because right, because then otherwise that emotion is going to get trapped into us.
• 27:38
  Frankie Socash: So it's a really like fine tune, and this is the stuff that I do with my clients is teaching them how to actually move an emotion through the body like a full circuit, so that way it doesn't get stuck.
• 27:48
  Frankie Socash: But it's also not actually ruling us.
• 27:51
  Frankie Socash: It's not creating these reactions, these knee jerk reactions that we don't necessarily want.
• 27:57
  Frankie Socash: So it's like these knee jerk reactions that we don't necessarily want.
• 27:59
  Frankie Socash: So it's like how can I be so present with that emotion and maybe take a moment, maybe take a moment to like breathe?
• 28:07
  Frankie Socash: And one of my favorite exercises to do is when we feel like an emotion rises and if you can start to track it and start to name where it's coming from.
• 28:17
  Frankie Socash: Let's say this emotion is always coming from like the solar plexus.
• 28:21
  Frankie Socash: Let's say it's coming from right there and it just it's this feeling and it's this.
• 28:26
  Frankie Socash: Oh my God, like I got it, I got it.
• 28:28
  Frankie Socash: It's creating this response.
• 28:29
  Frankie Socash: Right, it's okay, I feel this in my body.
• 28:32
  Frankie Socash: How can I just and it's a ball of energy.
• 28:35
  Frankie Socash: How can I disperse that throughout my entire body?
• 28:38
  Frankie Socash: How can I bring that out to the tips of my fingers and down to the tips of my toes and how can I be so present with it and allow it to fully move through my body?
• 28:47
  Frankie Socash: And it's you gotta, you gotta, lean into it.
• 28:50
  Frankie Socash: I don't know if you've ever had a massage or have you ever had what like when someone finds a knot?
• 28:56
  Frankie Socash: You know a knot, and if you have a skilled practitioner, they'll find it and they'll pin, and they'll pin it down and they'll lean into it and it's, oh God, like I, I feel that I like, yeah, it's, there's a lot of sensation and you just breathe.
• 29:12
  Frankie Socash: That's what it's like.
• 29:14
  Frankie Socash: It's like being able to find that spot, but we're the practitioners and it's an emotion, and so it's like how can I find just the right leverage to lean into it and allow it to move through me, but to be present with it enough so that I can still breathe and it's.
• 29:33
  Frankie Socash: It sometimes is a very uncomfortable moment.
• 29:37
  Frankie Socash: A couple of moments, yeah, but being able to be so present with it and then after that, because it takes about 90 seconds for an emotion to complete a circuit within the body as it comes up and then moves through the body, about 90 seconds.
• 29:53
  Frankie Socash: So that's a 90 seconds of just being for a moment, just taking a moment before and taking some breaths and then being able to move from that space of being like, okay, I moved through my own trigger, I moved through my own emotion.
• 30:06
  Frankie Socash: I'm now finding this place of regulation within myself and now I can go have a conversation of hey, what's going on, what's happening, are you okay?
• 30:16
  Frankie Socash: What do you need right now?
• 30:18
  Frankie Socash: Because I think oftentimes when children are reacting like that, it's what if they're needing something, but they don't have the words to explain it.
• 30:27
  Frankie Socash: They don't know the words of this is what's happening and this is what I'm feeling, and sometimes it's too overwhelming and so it comes out in those ways, like those knee-jerk reactions that we have when we feel those emotions.
• 30:38
  Frankie Socash: I think that also goes back to yeah, I don't know.
• 30:41
  Frankie Socash: Did that answer the question?
• 30:42
  Carrie Lingenfelter: It totally did.
• 30:43
  Carrie Lingenfelter: I think for me, breathing is one that I always stop, and it's interesting because my kids will stop the breathing, especially my son, and we're like breathe, you got to breathe.
• 30:54
  Carrie Lingenfelter: He's no, like he just has the build.
• 30:56
  Carrie Lingenfelter: He wants to just keep building it up to get the reaction from us and just like explode, like he wants that explosion to move that energy through.
• 31:05
  Carrie Lingenfelter: But I love the way that you're describing this because I have the similar feelings that he does, and so I think really working to get that breathing going will really help.
• 31:15
  Frankie Socash: Yeah, yeah, totally.
• 31:18
  Carrie Lingenfelter: Like naming will really help.
• 31:21
  Carrie Lingenfelter: Yeah, yeah, yeah, totally Like naming.
• 31:22
  Carrie Lingenfelter: There's that.
• 31:23
  Carrie Lingenfelter: It's like a Daniel Siegel author mentions name it to tame it.
• 31:25
  Carrie Lingenfelter: And with the kids I'm like I will always say because I don't want it to be an accusatory so I'm like I'm noticing that your fists are clenched or you're taking action at dad, something's going on Like how can I help you right now?
• 31:38
  Carrie Lingenfelter: And sometimes they'll say whatever it is, you're not listening to me right now.
• 31:43
  Carrie Lingenfelter: You only listen to brother for my daughter or something like that.
• 31:47
  Carrie Lingenfelter: And then if I listen to her, that's oftentimes the reason my six-year-old will have her explosive moments.
• 31:53
  Carrie Lingenfelter: It's we're not listening, we're not identifying with her problem.
• 31:58
  Carrie Lingenfelter: She just wants to tell us the problem.
• 32:00
  Carrie Lingenfelter: She doesn't want us to fix it.
• 32:02
  Carrie Lingenfelter: She wants us to say I'm so sorry you're going through that.
• 32:05
  Carrie Lingenfelter: How can I help you?
• 32:07
  Carrie Lingenfelter: Do you want a hug?
• 32:08
  Carrie Lingenfelter: Things like that.
• 32:10
  Carrie Lingenfelter: So, it's interesting we're thinking about it at an adult level too.
• 32:13
  Carrie Lingenfelter: But there's that piece of.
• 32:14
  Carrie Lingenfelter: I want to work through it, but I also need you here with me helping me work through it.
• 32:19
  Frankie Socash: Yeah, oh my gosh, yeah, totally.
• 32:22
  Frankie Socash: That's like the never ending story of the male and the female too, because I feel like oftentimes, like when I have something big in me and I like and I'll go to my partner and then he's OK, but what do you like, what should we do?
• 32:34
  Frankie Socash: Or he'll try to like fix it.
• 32:35
  Frankie Socash: I'm like no, I don't want you to fix it, I just want you to be with me, I just want hold me, touch my arm or something Like let me know you're here, yeah, and he doesn't get it.
• 32:44
  Frankie Socash: There's a, I can see it.
• 32:46
  Frankie Socash: There's a part of him that wants to like reach this ultimate truth of what is, and these emotions don't make sense.
• 32:55
  Frankie Socash: And I, he and he's, he's a great guy and so he's okay, I'll touch your arm, I'll nod my head, I hear you.
• 33:02
  Carrie Lingenfelter: Totally.
• 33:03
  Carrie Lingenfelter: Yes, I agree with the feminine and the masculine that's.
• 33:05
  Carrie Lingenfelter: I found that as well, and I also have found it like as an adult, even talking to my mom about something.
• 33:12
  Carrie Lingenfelter: I just want to I want you to understand how hard it can be parenting my two kids right now.
• 33:18
  Carrie Lingenfelter: To understand how hard it can be parenting my two kids right now.
• 33:20
  Carrie Lingenfelter: I don't need you to try to fix it.
• 33:22
  Carrie Lingenfelter: I don't need multiple articles on neurodiversity or I don't need you to send me these things.
• 33:28
  Carrie Lingenfelter: I need you to connect with me and understand that maybe I was an easy kid.
• 33:31
  Carrie Lingenfelter: You keep telling me I was an easy kid.
• 33:33
  Carrie Lingenfelter: I was made to be an easy kid.
• 33:36
  Carrie Lingenfelter: I thought that was my role was to be an easy kid, to be quiet, to be easy because you've been through a lot in your life, yeah, so just I think also in our own parenting journey we find that for ourselves again, like you we had talked about.
• 33:52
  Frankie Socash: Yeah.
• 33:52
  Carrie Lingenfelter: Yeah, I love so many of the things you're saying and do you have any tips on finding the trigger?
• 33:59
  Carrie Lingenfelter: If it's not, if we're not connected with our, is it connecting to our?
• 34:02
  Carrie Lingenfelter: Or I guess what would be your mindset on finding the trigger for parents or humans?
• 34:11
  Frankie Socash: yeah, that's a big question, it is, it is a really big question.
• 34:19
  Carrie Lingenfelter: But in our parenting journey, maybe number one step is like acknowledging and I don't know if you have any pieces that you feel drawn toward with that, or maybe the story that I told in that, like I'm realizing hey, I have a podcast now, I have a lot of voice getting my voice out, because I felt like I didn't as a child but yeah, those pieces letting my kids have their voice, seeing them for who they truly are, allowing them to tell me who they are, instead of being like you're so easy.
• 34:59
  Carrie Lingenfelter: Or yeah, I don't know.
• 35:00
  Carrie Lingenfelter: I was thinking of those pieces too.
• 35:03
  Frankie Socash: I'm still marinating on what you said about the trigger, like how do you find a trigger?
• 35:07
  Frankie Socash: Yeah, yeah, and I feel, do you know what your triggers are?
• 35:13
  Frankie Socash: I think for me and you don't have to share them.
• 35:17
  Frankie Socash: Sure, I'm trying to think, if I know them all, I don't know if I always do.
• 35:18
  Carrie Lingenfelter: I think for me and you don't have to share that Sure.
• 35:19
  Carrie Lingenfelter: I'm just trying to think if I know them all, I don't know if I always do.
• 35:22
  Carrie Lingenfelter: I think for me.
• 35:23
  Carrie Lingenfelter: I'm thinking in my mind like what is the trigger?
• 35:25
  Carrie Lingenfelter: Why do I have that eruption when one kid hurts the other or hurts an adult?
• 35:30
  Frankie Socash: I don't know if I know the trigger for that Oftentimes they come from the subconscious, so it's an unconscious response generally, usually like we can know what our trigger is but we don't know, but then it's hard to see it in the moment because then it's, then it turns into an unconscious response, right Like those knee jerk reactions.
• 35:49
  Frankie Socash: When we react from a like an emotional response, that's an unconscious response.
• 35:53
  Frankie Socash: So it's all very much like happening in the subconscious and the thing about the unconscious is you can't see it.
• 36:00
  Frankie Socash: You can't see it until you have it reflected for you.
• 36:05
  Frankie Socash: So having conversations with your partner, maybe having conversations with your children, and then you get to have, you get to discover, oh, that's a trigger, that's my trigger.
• 36:18
  Frankie Socash: I'm trying to think of if I have an example of what a trigger of mine is.
• 36:24
  Frankie Socash: So I grew up in a like a fairly violent household, so for me, any kind of like physical like if anyone's trying to hold me down or do something that I don't like physically with my body, and that's a trigger for me and I have been known to snap from that like it, like that kind of knee jerk reaction, but I'm like, okay, so I know what my trigger is and that came from doing a lot of work, hiring a lot of mentors, having a lot of coaches.
• 36:56
  Frankie Socash: I went to therapy for a little while and so I think the thing about our triggers, or even just anything that is unconscious, like it really can, unless we're diving really deeply into dreams but even then we still need to be able to have something to reflect back to us because we can't always see it and then, as you start to pinpoint what the trigger is, then becomes the process of okay, now, how do I lean into it?
• 37:27
  Frankie Socash: How do I start to break up the pattern of this happens, and then I react like this how do I break up that pattern?
• 37:35
  Frankie Socash: And you just start to collapse time a little bit of okay, I know what my trigger is.
• 37:40
  Frankie Socash: I'm going to go through a couple more interactions that are going to bring up this trigger for healing.
• 37:47
  Frankie Socash: Right, it's because there's something that's unresolved within us and it's wanting to seek resolution.
• 37:51
  Frankie Socash: So it's coming up for a purpose and I think, even just having that mindset about a trigger, it's not anything I don't know, it's not like I need to get rid of it, I need to like there's not this magic pill that's going to take it away.
• 38:08
  Frankie Socash: It's a process and it's a journey and being able to identify it and then start to break it down to, okay, what happens.
• 38:15
  Frankie Socash: As soon as I know I'm triggered, what's the first thing that happens in my body and that's the process that I go through is being able to identify, like, what's happening in my body, what's the first thing, to go into contraction and then from there it's like a domino effect.
• 38:31
  Frankie Socash: Right, there will be one piece of our body that's going to contract, and then maybe some other pieces, and then it's going to come out in some kind of arms or legs or voice or everything.
• 38:41
  Frankie Socash: So, yeah, I think obviously curiosity is going to be the big one and seeing it as this opportunity for healing rather than oh, I just need to make this stop, because trying to make it stop is only going to perpetuate it.
• 38:57
  Frankie Socash: And this makes me think about the co-regulation.
• 39:01
  Frankie Socash: What if we were to co-regulate with the triggers?
• 39:05
  Frankie Socash: And, rather than trying to encourage someone or a child to just breathe, what if we just sat there with them and were breathing?
• 39:15
  Frankie Socash: Because if children do, if they model what we do rather than what we say, and we were just there and very present, we didn't even have to say anything.
• 39:23
  Frankie Socash: We could just be breathing, making it audible, whatever, and just sit there and just breathe, and it takes a little bit, but eventually their system is going to link up with that system.
• 39:34
  Frankie Socash: And so what if we treated the trigger in the same way of oh okay, like, I see you right, this is.
• 39:40
  Frankie Socash: It's like holding like another part of ourselves.
• 39:42
  Frankie Socash: It's like this is in our child work too, and, depending on where this trigger could be anywhere in the journey, it could be an older version of us, it could be a younger version of us.
• 39:53
  Frankie Socash: But holding it in that same way, the way that we would a child of what's up, what's going on, what are you feeling, and then just breathe with it and watch it, that's how I would approach that.
• 40:03
  Carrie Lingenfelter: I'd say I love it.
• 40:05
  Carrie Lingenfelter: That's so helpful.
• 40:07
  Carrie Lingenfelter: Thank you, I know my question was very big in the scenario right, it was a big question.
• 40:14
  Carrie Lingenfelter: I feel like my daughter comes to me with questions like that, these big questions of who are?
• 40:23
  Carrie Lingenfelter: We, where are we from?
• 40:24
  Carrie Lingenfelter: I'm like, okay, that's going to take a minute.
• 40:25
  Frankie Socash: I love it.
• 40:25
  Frankie Socash: Yeah, I appreciate it, frankie.
• 40:26
  Frankie Socash: Yeah, oh my gosh.
• 40:26
  Frankie Socash: Yeah, I love it.
• 40:26
  Frankie Socash: I love the questions that like get me to think too and like really dig deeper.
• 40:31
  Frankie Socash: I'm like how do you even answer?
• 40:33
  Carrie Lingenfelter: that I know.
• 40:34
  Carrie Lingenfelter: I know it's so many.
• 40:35
  Carrie Lingenfelter: It's amazing opportunities for growth and reflection.
• 40:39
  Carrie Lingenfelter: And that's this podcasting journey for me.
• 40:41
  Carrie Lingenfelter: It's been so wonderful and I have a personal question.
• 40:45
  Carrie Lingenfelter: I wanted to ask you do you what are your thoughts on Kundalini?
• 40:51
  Carrie Lingenfelter: I had that since I started, since I did Reiki, and then I started doing my meditation and I noticed I had all of these movements and I'm like what is going on?
• 41:00
  Carrie Lingenfelter: It was after having my son and then studying Reiki and I started to my mom and I finally my mom has it as well we finally were able to name it.
• 41:08
  Carrie Lingenfelter: It didn't tame it though.
• 41:13
  Carrie Lingenfelter: No, but I've heard interesting things.
• 41:15
  Carrie Lingenfelter: I just wanted to connect with you on that.
• 41:16
  Carrie Lingenfelter: If anybody's having that.
• 41:18
  Frankie Socash: Yeah, oh, my God, I love this.
• 41:20
  Frankie Socash: It lights me up.
• 41:20
  Frankie Socash: Yeah, what you said about being able to name it, didn't tame it.
• 41:25
  Frankie Socash: I think there's something about it just to say naming it to tame it.
• 41:32
  Frankie Socash: I believe in naming it, but I don't believe in taming it.
• 41:35
  Frankie Socash: I don't believe in taming it.
• 41:38
  Frankie Socash: I think even trying to tame it is going to create a lot of problems, a lot of physical ailments, a lot of maybe even psychological issues as well.
• 41:49
  Frankie Socash: Kundalini is the energy that's located at the base of the spine.
• 41:53
  Frankie Socash: This is connected to our sexuality.
• 41:55
  Frankie Socash: This is connected to our sensuality, to our creativity.
• 41:59
  Frankie Socash: This is like the primal life force, energy that lives inside of us and over.
• 42:04
  Frankie Socash: I don't even know how long.
• 42:07
  Frankie Socash: I don't even know how long we can say that it's the patriarchy.
• 42:11
  Frankie Socash: We can easily blame society and the world that we're living in now as to why so many people are cut off from their vitality, from who they truly are, from this kundalini energy that lives inside of us, and I think for me, that's the least interesting part of the conversation, and it's more okay.
• 42:31
  Frankie Socash: How do we nurture this?
• 42:32
  Frankie Socash: How do we bring it forth?
• 42:34
  Frankie Socash: How do we?
• 42:35
  Frankie Socash: Again, I feel like everything, especially these days, comes back to how do we again it all I feel like everything, especially these days, comes back to how do we increase our capacity to experience it?
• 42:42
  Frankie Socash: Because I think a lot of bodies have been taught to cut it off, have been taught to fear it, have been taught to reject it, and so the capacity is, capacity is very.
• 42:55
  Frankie Socash: It's like this, and then there's this kind of big bubbling energy happening inside, which is the Kundalini energy, and it's moving and it's undulating through us and if we're not moving with that it's, you know, I don't think that it will go away.
• 43:17
  Frankie Socash: I don't think it will stop.
• 43:18
  Frankie Socash: It will come out in different ways.
• 43:20
  Frankie Socash: It will start to seep out in ways that are maybe not healthy.
• 43:24
  Frankie Socash: It'll seep out in ways that are maybe unconscious, that could potentially I don't know cause harm.
• 43:31
  Frankie Socash: I don't know exactly.
• 43:32
  Frankie Socash: It's a really powerful energy and being able to remember who we really are and the power that we have as human beings, as really creative energetic beings, it's really profound and it really excites me to know that there are a lot of people who are connecting to this energy and this energy that is actually getting activated and turned on.
• 43:56
  Frankie Socash: I think that there's many different thoughts as to what's happening, whether it's astrologically, cosmically, whatever's happening on the planet solar flares, 5g, you name it.
• 44:08
  Frankie Socash: There's just so many things that are happening that are altering our energetic capacity and being able to move with it.
• 44:17
  Frankie Socash: And so, if we think about Kundalini energy and how it's a serpent, snake-like energy, right, this is like how does your body want to move it, how does your body want to move with it, or how does it want to move your body, and you can play with these different ways and how you want to relate to it or how it relates to you and being able to move it through the body, right, and so playing with it, like if you can feel it moving in your body.
• 44:41
  Frankie Socash: You said you felt.
• 44:41
  Frankie Socash: What did you feel?
• 44:43
  Carrie Lingenfelter: I'm doing it right now.
• 44:44
  Carrie Lingenfelter: When I first got it, it was like turning my head like up and down.
• 44:49
  Carrie Lingenfelter: Now I get it.
• 44:50
  Carrie Lingenfelter: The time where I really feel it release is during when I'm doing Qigong like a group Qigong class I go to weekly and I love it because it's a nice movement and it comes out and it just moves with it.
• 45:02
  Carrie Lingenfelter: Or sometimes when I'm meditating too, I get it.
• 45:04
  Carrie Lingenfelter: So I'm learning to embrace it and let it out and it's growing into different versions.
• 45:10
  Carrie Lingenfelter: It's really cool.
• 45:12
  Frankie Socash: Yeah, yeah, that's so exciting, that's powerful.
• 45:14
  Frankie Socash: That's so powerful.
• 45:15
  Frankie Socash: Yeah, I think it probably looks different for everybody, but I think often, oftentimes, it's definitely this like energy, that's like very felt right in the base of the spine or even just up the spine.
• 45:27
  Frankie Socash: Sometimes it gets stuck a little bit like behind, maybe the heart or or the occiput area, which is the base of the skull, and I think it's like encouraging.
• 45:38
  Frankie Socash: It's it's very energetic, but it's also very visceral, and so being able to move it through the body, I think is a really powerful practice and stuff like Qigong.
• 45:48
  Frankie Socash: Obviously, there's Kundalini yoga, which was created for that.
• 45:54
  Carrie Lingenfelter: Yeah, I haven't tried it yet, but I definitely need to look into it.
• 45:57
  Carrie Lingenfelter: It would be awesome.
• 45:58
  Carrie Lingenfelter: Yeah, yeah, frankie, thanks so much for answering my yeah, I haven't tried it yet, but I definitely need to look into it.
• 46:01
  Carrie Lingenfelter: It would be awesome.
• 46:02
  Carrie Lingenfelter: Yeah, yeah, frankie, thanks so much for answering my random questions and following along on my journey.
• 46:07
  Carrie Lingenfelter: I love it and I love you.
• 46:08
  Carrie Lingenfelter: You mentioned that you do some business or some practices with helping business ladies starting their entrepreneur journeys.
• 46:16
  Carrie Lingenfelter: I love that.
• 46:17
  Frankie Socash: Yeah, yeah, so it's, I guess, more what I'm doing right now.
• 46:20
  Frankie Socash: I have a mentorship that I'm walking women through and a lot of it is really rooted in some of the conversation that we had today and being able to understand triggers, how to honor emotions and how to move them through the body and how to be able to create the structure within the body that creates a system to where you can move through it naturally and be really present.
• 46:41
  Frankie Socash: So it becomes almost ingrained, right, it's like creating this new neurology to be able to move these emotions and move these triggers and move old trauma, old stagnant stories, whatever it is, whatever we may be holding onto that is keeping us from actually being able to show up in the way that we really freaking want to Love it.
• 47:01
  Frankie Socash: That's really all it is.
• 47:02
  Frankie Socash: And yeah, and a lot of what I'm doing is being able to do that foundational work and then, of course, walking women through the process and helping them be able to figure out how to work with clients, how to fine tune their skills working with clients, how to set up payment plans, how to do all that stuff and actually get to the point where they are being able to really develop the service that they're here to offer through their own transformation and through their own really unique way of working in the world, and then offer that so that's so wonderful.
• 47:35
  Carrie Lingenfelter: I've been on that journey myself and doing a lot of that myself at home, and so it's really powerful when we can bring that into our business side.
• 47:43
  Carrie Lingenfelter: Yeah, I love that yeah.
• 47:45
  Carrie Lingenfelter: I'll include all of your information in our show notes today, where they can find you, and they should go follow you on Instagram, because I love it.
• 47:53
  Carrie Lingenfelter: It's been a journey, so thanks so much for being here, frankie.
• 47:56
  Carrie Lingenfelter: I love chatting with you yeah, thank you.
• 47:59
  Frankie Socash: Thank you, carrie.
• 47:59
  Frankie Socash: It's so good to be here, it's so good to connect with you and, yeah, have this conversation.
• 48:03
  Frankie Socash: It was nice and juicy juicy, to say the least.
• 48:07
  Carrie Lingenfelter: Thank you, frankie.
• 48:08
  Carrie Lingenfelter: That's a wrap.
• 48:09
  Carrie Lingenfelter: Thanks so much for tuning in.
• 48:11
  Carrie Lingenfelter: Change makers.
• 48:12
  Carrie Lingenfelter: This is Carrie, and if you haven't done a review for us, five stars and a little few words about what you've enjoyed in our podcast episodes, we would really appreciate it.
• 48:22
  Carrie Lingenfelter: If you guys would like to ever message me, I would love any questions you have or any feedback.
• 48:28
  Carrie Lingenfelter: At info at hearttoheartlifecom, we also have a brand new website which we're super excited to share.
• 48:35
  Carrie Lingenfelter: It's hearttoheartlifecom.
• 48:38
  Carrie Lingenfelter: Thanks so much for tuning in and happy life, happy times.
• 48:41
  Carrie Lingenfelter: Changemaker families.