Latest / Aired Out / Brandon Carbo

Transcript

Brandon Carbo · Aired Out

• 0:49
  Speaker 1: So where are you from?
• 0:51
  Speaker 2: Originally? I was born in Berlin. I'm from Barry.
• 0:55
  Speaker 1: Okay. Did you go to high school locally?
• 1:00
  Speaker 2: Uh? No, I went to high school over at Lamoy Union.
• 1:03
  Speaker 1: Where lam Oyal Union? When did you graduate?
• 1:08
  Speaker 2: Two thousand and nine?
• 1:09
  Speaker 1: Okay? Oh, so not that long ago. How old are you.
• 1:15
  Speaker 2: Gonna be? Thirty four? Thirty three now? June seventh my birthday?
• 1:19
  Speaker 1: Okay? Where where have you lived over the last couple
• 1:23
  Speaker 1: of years?
• 1:25
  Speaker 2: Last couple of years, I've lived in Barry in Montpellier Okay?
• 1:30
  Speaker 1: Do you have an apartment? I do not. Okay. So
• 1:34
  Speaker 1: the last last couple of years you have been what
• 1:38
  Speaker 1: staying with friends or.
• 1:41
  Speaker 2: Ah? Yeah? Surfing?
• 1:43
  Speaker 1: Yeah? So how was how was your your childhood? How
• 1:50
  Speaker 1: was mom and dad?
• 1:53
  Speaker 2: My dad was a yeah, it was a bit of
• 1:56
  Speaker 2: an abusive drunk.
• 1:58
  Speaker 1: Okay.
• 1:59
  Speaker 2: My mom good person, but she was an attic. They
• 2:05
  Speaker 2: fought a lot. They didn't stay together long, but it
• 2:09
  Speaker 2: was split custody between them. My dad he lived till
• 2:16
  Speaker 2: twenty fifteen and he died from cancer.
• 2:21
  Speaker 1: Twenty fifteen. Ye okay, what was that like for you
• 2:26
  Speaker 1: when he passed away?
• 2:28
  Speaker 2: It was a little hard, but I'd say it wasn't
• 2:32
  Speaker 2: as hard as losing my sister Amber and my sister Bethany.
• 2:37
  Speaker 1: Amber and Bethany, your two sisters.
• 2:40
  Speaker 2: My biologicals. I lost Amber in twenty twelve and I
• 2:45
  Speaker 2: lost my sister Bethany and twenty nineteen.
• 2:50
  Speaker 1: From what now? Did how did they pass overdoses? Wow?
• 2:58
  Speaker 1: On what drug? If you don't mind my asking.
• 3:03
  Speaker 2: Bethany, they said was a guiter. I think it was
• 3:07
  Speaker 2: more to it than that. My mom says it was
• 3:10
  Speaker 2: just a goiter and her intestines. So I mean, that's
• 3:14
  Speaker 2: what the odd tops are poorbably, but I think the
• 3:17
  Speaker 2: other thing led to that, for a neglect to her body.
• 3:22
  Speaker 2: Amber was a combination of two different substances and pills, and.
• 3:35
  Speaker 1: I do believe a bag as well, bag of heroin. Yeah,
• 3:44
  Speaker 1: where did they? Where did they pass away? Where? Where?
• 3:47
  Speaker 1: Where did all that happen?
• 3:48
  Speaker 2: Bethany up and Highgate apartments? And uh, my sister Amber
• 3:54
  Speaker 2: was right on Summer Street and apartment the dad's apartment.
• 3:59
  Speaker 2: He lost his wife eight days prior to the same apartment.
• 4:03
  Speaker 1: Okay, so what what what led you? You know, I'm
• 4:09
  Speaker 1: trying to get to the root of things here, of
• 4:13
  Speaker 1: what has led you circumstantially to where we are today
• 4:18
  Speaker 1: and what's happening today. And I think some of this
• 4:23
  Speaker 1: is circumstance and some of this is just some some
• 4:27
  Speaker 1: bad decision making.
• 4:29
  Speaker 2: A lot of bad decision making. I'm not going to
• 4:34
  Speaker 2: sit there and make excuses. I am going to say
• 4:37
  Speaker 2: that the things that happened in my life changed me
• 4:40
  Speaker 2: a lot mentally. And there's a lot of people that say,
• 4:44
  Speaker 2: poor you.
• 4:45
  Speaker 3: What was you.
• 4:48
  Speaker 2: Until you go through that? You don't like? You don't know?
• 4:56
  Speaker 2: You know, there are a lot of people in this
• 4:58
  Speaker 2: town that have lost a good amount of people. And
• 5:01
  Speaker 2: I've gotten to know those select few and that they
• 5:06
  Speaker 2: they're holding on by a string. And that's the difference
• 5:09
  Speaker 2: between me and them, is they're holding on by a string.
• 5:12
  Speaker 2: I just lost so much in such a short time.
• 5:17
  Speaker 2: I just lost myself.
• 5:20
  Speaker 1: Are you Are you holding on by a string? Or
• 5:23
  Speaker 1: are you not?
• 5:25
  Speaker 2: I'd say barely. Honestly, there's a lot going on in
• 5:33
  Speaker 2: this town, the hatred towards me, and I don't blame them.
• 5:38
  Speaker 2: I don't. But at the same time, I when I
• 5:43
  Speaker 2: needed people, you know, other than my family, and like
• 5:47
  Speaker 2: my cousin Arianna, her mom, and I love my mom,
• 5:52
  Speaker 2: but honestly, my cousin Arion and her mom really pulled
• 5:59
  Speaker 2: together with my dad's funeral and for it when Amber's funeral.
• 6:05
  Speaker 2: My sister Bethany or Karen, I mean, helped meld everything together.
• 6:12
  Speaker 2: And just you know, my nephews that are the children
• 6:19
  Speaker 2: of my sisters that passed away are doing great. I
• 6:24
  Speaker 2: got a nephew here in town that is over at Domino's.
• 6:29
  Speaker 2: It's really like he's got gone through the loss and
• 6:32
  Speaker 2: he's got a lot of hatred towards me right now.
• 6:34
  Speaker 2: He used to look up to me. And then you
• 6:38
  Speaker 2: got my other nephews that just two of them that
• 6:41
  Speaker 2: moved out of state because of everything, the drugs.
• 6:45
  Speaker 1: And where are you? Where are you living? Where'd you
• 6:49
  Speaker 1: sleep last night?
• 6:53
  Speaker 2: I slept. I slept outside. Yeah, igstraight in the woods tent.
• 7:04
  Speaker 1: Okay are you are you with others?
• 7:08
  Speaker 2: No? Just my my girlfriend.
• 7:13
  Speaker 1: Okay, you look tired of hell man.
• 7:17
  Speaker 2: I am just running back and forth, just trying to
• 7:22
  Speaker 2: get money for food or whatever and dumb, dumb things.
• 7:31
  Speaker 2: It's a bad choice. I had a good job roofing.
• 7:38
  Speaker 2: After the flood happened, I didn't think I was going
• 7:40
  Speaker 2: to find work. I lost everything in the flood, that's
• 7:45
  Speaker 2: when I really went downhill. I was working at Jay Morgan's.
• 7:49
  Speaker 2: It was a chef. I was doing great, and the
• 7:52
  Speaker 2: flood happened. I was really starting to lose myself because work,
• 7:56
  Speaker 2: honestly is what made me get through it. And I
• 8:04
  Speaker 2: got this job roofing and.
• 8:10
  Speaker 1: I ended up going through a.
• 8:13
  Speaker 2: Relationship problem and that's when I just finally lost myself.
• 8:18
  Speaker 2: I think that's really where I went right over the
• 8:20
  Speaker 2: edge and just gave up.
• 8:23
  Speaker 1: Why do you think there are so many people that
• 8:29
  Speaker 1: are surprised that you're on the air this morning on
• 8:35
  Speaker 1: Aired Out.
• 8:39
  Speaker 2: Because of the hatred. Honestly, there's a lot of hatred,
• 8:42
  Speaker 2: and probably we would thought that I would have came
• 8:45
  Speaker 2: on here, but I wanted to say my story. I'm
• 8:49
  Speaker 2: not making excuses. I'm just saying what led.
• 8:53
  Speaker 1: Me here, and you know.
• 8:58
  Speaker 2: Just not having the support that you need, like not
• 9:02
  Speaker 2: reaching out enough. I guess because I've reached out a
• 9:05
  Speaker 2: lot psychologists, counselors, and it just it wasn't working for me.
• 9:13
  Speaker 2: Work was my counselor, and I guess you could call
• 9:17
  Speaker 2: it my own form of self medication at the time.
• 9:20
  Speaker 2: There's a lot of hemnors that do.
• 9:22
  Speaker 1: That do you ever say to yourself, I'm not sorry.
• 9:29
  Speaker 1: I don't care what others are saying to you. But
• 9:31
  Speaker 1: do you ever say to yourself, I'm thirty four years old,
• 9:39
  Speaker 1: I've got so many years ahead of me. I've got
• 9:43
  Speaker 1: my whole life ahead of me. It's not too late.
• 9:49
  Speaker 1: I can turn this ship around. Do you ever say
• 9:52
  Speaker 1: that to yourself?
• 9:53
  Speaker 2: Absolutely?
• 9:54
  Speaker 1: How often.
• 9:57
  Speaker 2: Lately the past couple of weeks, I've really been That's
• 10:00
  Speaker 2: why I got my ID, I get the stuff I need,
• 10:05
  Speaker 2: and I'm gonna be getting work. It's a slow process
• 10:12
  Speaker 2: because there's a lot of places that don't want to
• 10:14
  Speaker 2: hire me. But there are a couple of places that
• 10:18
  Speaker 2: somewhat willing. All I need is one, honestly, one person
• 10:21
  Speaker 2: willing to hire me. I'ld bust my ass. I wouldn't
• 10:25
  Speaker 2: miss work. I'd live the old life behind me. But
• 10:31
  Speaker 2: for work, for most people, it's just for a paycheck.
• 10:33
  Speaker 2: For me, it's not just a paycheck, it's it helps
• 10:39
  Speaker 2: me get through. Also, I feel like, compared to something,
• 10:44
  Speaker 2: I don't have much family left in my life. I
• 10:46
  Speaker 2: don't have much any friends really, you know, like to
• 10:52
  Speaker 2: live alone my life like that. It's a bad choices, Yes,
• 10:57
  Speaker 2: but there's also a lot of people that just in
• 10:59
  Speaker 2: my life naturally that just weren't there, you know, Like
• 11:04
  Speaker 2: I got a carbo side of the family that has
• 11:07
  Speaker 2: nothing to do with me inhabit since the funeral, and
• 11:11
  Speaker 2: then my mom's side of the family. They all keep
• 11:13
  Speaker 2: to themselves really other than the select few. But yes,
• 11:19
  Speaker 2: I do tell myself that all the time, something's gonna change.
• 11:24
  Speaker 2: It's gonna give. And my girlfriend like mentally she can't
• 11:29
  Speaker 2: handle anymore of this life, so I know something's gonna change.
• 11:40
  Speaker 1: You know. I listen, I'll be straight with you and like, like,
• 11:45
  Speaker 1: like you said, you already know this. You're not well
• 11:50
  Speaker 1: liked in this community for a lot of reasons. I
• 11:54
  Speaker 1: mean I see stuff about you all the time on
• 11:58
  Speaker 1: social media. Somebody has been carboed. What's what what is that?
• 12:02
  Speaker 1: What's what's that all about?
• 12:04
  Speaker 2: That's that's because of panhandling. Somebody came up with the
• 12:09
  Speaker 2: idea to come up with the shirt a shirt, yeah,
• 12:14
  Speaker 2: and then they've been carboded. It's because of like, because
• 12:18
  Speaker 2: of the things I'll say to get the money enviorron,
• 12:23
  Speaker 2: you know, get money. Uh. Sometimes I lie, but there's
• 12:36
  Speaker 2: times where I actually say true things that have happened
• 12:39
  Speaker 2: in my life. Do you get the money which is
• 12:42
  Speaker 2: still wrong. I'm just trying to survive and hold on,
• 12:50
  Speaker 2: like today, where you know we're gonna go out and
• 12:55
  Speaker 2: try to figure out some food and just the basic
• 12:59
  Speaker 2: things that everybody they don't think about.
• 13:01
  Speaker 1: Are you an aggressive handler or are you someone who
• 13:07
  Speaker 1: weasels your way around?
• 13:14
  Speaker 2: I'd say, uh, a combination.
• 13:19
  Speaker 1: You know.
• 13:20
  Speaker 2: Some of the cops say that I'm aggressive. Aggressive to
• 13:24
  Speaker 2: me is somebody that's like swears and gets angry when
• 13:27
  Speaker 2: they're told. Now, I don't. I am polite about it,
• 13:31
  Speaker 2: so I wouldn't really call myself aggressive. I'll say consistent,
• 13:37
  Speaker 2: and I wouldn't really say weasel like weasel around. Well,
• 13:41
  Speaker 2: some would say weasel around.
• 13:45
  Speaker 1: What do you say? What do you say?
• 13:47
  Speaker 2: I say that I just get around and try to
• 13:50
  Speaker 2: be polite and I'm just moving constantly. I'm somebody that
• 13:56
  Speaker 2: moves constantly.
• 13:59
  Speaker 1: But but oat mostly around Berry City.
• 14:03
  Speaker 2: Yeah, I'm not allowed on the bus right now. I
• 14:07
  Speaker 2: handed another homeless person a cigarette. Guy was all messed up.
• 14:13
  Speaker 2: I can't let it live on my conscience giving somebody drugs,
• 14:18
  Speaker 2: believe it or not, I if I medicate myself, it's
• 14:21
  Speaker 2: one thing, but especially when it comes to dope and
• 14:26
  Speaker 2: all that. This guy wanted dope and I weren't gonna
• 14:30
  Speaker 2: give it to him, so I just I just gave
• 14:32
  Speaker 2: him a cigarette, and they assumed that I gave him
• 14:38
  Speaker 2: drugs and that freaking got me kicked off. And then
• 14:46
  Speaker 2: to top it off, I got in an altercation with
• 14:48
  Speaker 2: a bus driver for calling my woman a see you
• 14:52
  Speaker 2: next Tuesday, and I ended up losing it and a
• 15:01
  Speaker 2: little bit and I just lost my chances of getting
• 15:04
  Speaker 2: on the bus.
• 15:07
  Speaker 1: Was it was it drugs that you were giving it?
• 15:10
  Speaker 1: Or really? Was it a six?
• 15:12
  Speaker 2: That's being real.
• 15:14
  Speaker 1: Well, listen, man, h I expect you to be real
• 15:20
  Speaker 1: with me. And when you came through the door, it's
• 15:24
  Speaker 1: that's kind of what I said to you too. You're
• 15:27
  Speaker 1: on the camera, You're you're on the record, and that's
• 15:32
  Speaker 1: a big deal for me. I don't take this kind
• 15:37
  Speaker 1: of stuff like lately. I asked you to come in here,
• 15:41
  Speaker 1: I met with you, and it's a big deal for me, So.
• 15:45
  Speaker 2: Big deal for me too. I just want people to
• 15:48
  Speaker 2: like know that in this town that I'm sorry for
• 15:52
  Speaker 2: the things I've done like I do over the town,
• 15:55
  Speaker 2: at least that I wanted to apologize on air two
• 16:00
  Speaker 2: as well that I know I made poor choices in
• 16:04
  Speaker 2: this town. I know I terrorized communities and publicly I'm
• 16:09
  Speaker 2: sorry for that. But I want to say that if
• 16:14
  Speaker 2: there's one out there listening that's willing to give me
• 16:17
  Speaker 2: a job, I'll be here on Main Street, welcome back
• 16:23
  Speaker 2: and forth, not panhandling. Literally now I'm going on bearing
• 16:27
  Speaker 2: my Pilier Road as well for work. I just want
• 16:33
  Speaker 2: work so I can rebuild my in this community, rebuild
• 16:37
  Speaker 2: myself my name.
• 16:38
  Speaker 1: What if this community were to say to you, which
• 16:41
  Speaker 1: I've heard a lot of, don't bother because you're not
• 16:46
  Speaker 1: You're not welcome here in this community. There are those
• 16:50
  Speaker 1: there are plenty that are saying that are you Are
• 16:53
  Speaker 1: you willing to to move? Are you willing to even
• 16:58
  Speaker 1: possibly leave Fromontan. We have a local business owner who's
• 17:04
  Speaker 1: offered to get you to pay for a one way
• 17:08
  Speaker 1: ticket for you.
• 17:11
  Speaker 2: Tell me about that cornerstone? Yeah?
• 17:16
  Speaker 1: Is that that's a true story.
• 17:18
  Speaker 2: Here's the thing. What they don't know. There's certain legal
• 17:23
  Speaker 2: things that are keeping me in state, but also my mom,
• 17:28
  Speaker 2: like I you know, don't get me wrong, I know
• 17:33
  Speaker 2: there's people out there that want to hurt me in
• 17:36
  Speaker 2: bad ways, and regardless, I'm not going to ditch my mom.
• 17:43
  Speaker 2: And I know I can rebuild and change my life.
• 17:47
  Speaker 2: I mean, there's a judge that committed manslaughter that changed
• 17:51
  Speaker 2: his life, changed his name and became a judge. I
• 17:58
  Speaker 2: do you believe know drug charges? Either way, it was
• 18:02
  Speaker 2: felony charge and this man ended up turning his life
• 18:05
  Speaker 2: around and becoming a judge. You know, there's people that
• 18:10
  Speaker 2: committed murder in this town alone that are now working
• 18:13
  Speaker 2: for what do you call rehabilitation place turning point. I
• 18:20
  Speaker 2: was in jail for thirty years, got out. It works
• 18:23
  Speaker 2: for turning point. He was in bad attic that his
• 18:27
  Speaker 2: addiction led to somebody being murdered. I know I could
• 18:32
  Speaker 2: make a turnaround. Am I gonna say it's gonna be
• 18:34
  Speaker 2: easy getting the town to like me. No, But at
• 18:38
  Speaker 2: the end of the day, half of the town doesn't
• 18:40
  Speaker 2: even know each other personally. I mean, you have vermonors.
• 18:44
  Speaker 2: We we adjust. I'm just gonna have to see through
• 18:54
  Speaker 2: my actions instead of just words.
• 18:56
  Speaker 1: Well that's you know, that's one of the things I
• 18:59
  Speaker 1: was just going to ask you. Does true remorse begin
• 19:07
  Speaker 1: with real change? And that's a comment from Michelle this morning.
• 19:12
  Speaker 2: Yeah, Michelle, hhmm.
• 19:17
  Speaker 1: True remorse starts with real change. You believe that. Yeah,
• 19:25
  Speaker 1: it's kind of what you're eluding.
• 19:29
  Speaker 2: Change. Yeah, I need to change. I've been eluding it
• 19:33
  Speaker 2: a lot. I'm wondering if that, uh, that person that
• 19:39
  Speaker 2: just asks that is my AX. I'm sorry, there's a
• 19:43
  Speaker 2: I have an X, say Michelle that I I guess
• 19:46
  Speaker 2: was going to be listening to this. She's one of
• 19:48
  Speaker 2: the people affected by my life choice.
• 19:52
  Speaker 1: I know this, lady. That's not your ex.
• 19:56
  Speaker 2: My apologies. Yeah, now it does. It does.
• 20:07
  Speaker 1: Here's my question for you, Okay, I'm just gonna be honest.
• 20:14
  Speaker 1: You said earlier that you're just trying to survive. You
• 20:23
  Speaker 1: are accused of aggressive panhandling, frequent aggressive panhandling. If you're
• 20:38
  Speaker 1: just trying to survive, then why why would you take
• 20:44
  Speaker 1: any of the money that you get from panhandling and
• 20:51
  Speaker 1: buy cigarettes with it? Now, maybe maybe I'm out of
• 20:55
  Speaker 1: touch for asking that question. I don't smoke. I don't
• 20:58
  Speaker 1: know what it's like to be addicted to to cigarettes
• 21:01
  Speaker 1: or anything, But why why why spend that money on
• 21:07
  Speaker 1: a pack of cigarettes which is running thirteen bucks right now? Man,
• 21:13
  Speaker 1: if you're trying to survive.
• 21:17
  Speaker 2: There are some things that I'm not willing to give up.
• 21:20
  Speaker 2: Cigarettes are definitely one of them. But I do get
• 21:23
  Speaker 2: your point. I don't know any true other true smokers,
• 21:29
  Speaker 2: but vaping just is not the same. But bottom line,
• 21:36
  Speaker 2: there's other things that I should put you on.
• 21:51
  Speaker 1: What about tell us your version of what happened with
• 21:56
  Speaker 1: Officer McCowan.
• 22:07
  Speaker 2: To be honest, a lot of people liked McGowan. I'm
• 22:11
  Speaker 2: not saying he was a terrible cop. Personally myself. I'll
• 22:18
  Speaker 2: be respectful of cops, but personally myself, other than my
• 22:23
  Speaker 2: cousin Trevor, who is a state trooper, I don't really
• 22:29
  Speaker 2: the life I've lived. I don't talk to cops. I'm
• 22:31
  Speaker 2: just gonna be real with you right now. I don't
• 22:34
  Speaker 2: really associate, you know. I'll be polite as I can,
• 22:40
  Speaker 2: just because I'm not trying to have problems, but personally
• 22:43
  Speaker 2: I don't like them. But as far as McGowan goes
• 22:48
  Speaker 2: as an individual, he wasn't a bad person. He helped
• 22:51
  Speaker 2: a lot of kids. He cared about people in this community.
• 22:56
  Speaker 2: But this town and the drugs changed him in a way,
• 23:00
  Speaker 2: at him utally, and he got sick of me panhandling.
• 23:04
  Speaker 2: I think just what happened was Iran that day tried
• 23:10
  Speaker 2: eluding him, went behind uh house, said uh, I got
• 23:20
  Speaker 2: caught in some vines and bushes, and he dove. He's
• 23:28
  Speaker 2: a big guy. He is a big guy and he's
• 23:31
  Speaker 2: a marine. And like when I was trying in the struggle,
• 23:36
  Speaker 2: I ended up getting handcuffed. And at that point, like
• 23:41
  Speaker 2: with him on top of me, I was starting to
• 23:42
  Speaker 2: have a seizure and I was in the camera. Everybody's
• 23:49
  Speaker 2: could see you. I said, I can't breathe, and I
• 23:52
  Speaker 2: really couldn't have a fear of suffocation. I was drowned
• 23:56
  Speaker 2: purposely as in a kid as a kid by somebody.
• 24:01
  Speaker 2: They tried to hold me underwater. So I hate not
• 24:04
  Speaker 2: being able to breathe. But then tobbly just I think
• 24:10
  Speaker 2: I drooled on him during the seizure. He put it
• 24:13
  Speaker 2: in the report that I spit on him and I
• 24:15
  Speaker 2: ended up getting hit in the head. I didn't realize
• 24:18
  Speaker 2: what he had hit me with, but either way, I
• 24:21
  Speaker 2: got hit in Then.
• 24:29
  Speaker 1: Were you in somebody's house hmm.
• 24:33
  Speaker 2: Before that incident, Yeah, And it wasn't due to breaking
• 24:39
  Speaker 2: an entering. I'm fighting that now. I was let in
• 24:42
  Speaker 2: by a friend of mine. I knew all the people
• 24:47
  Speaker 2: at that house. It wasn't just a random thing. I
• 24:50
  Speaker 2: didn't just kick in the door. That that charge is faulse.
• 25:00
  Speaker 1: Nick. I am given this guy my platform so that
• 25:07
  Speaker 1: there is some transparency, at least from his side of
• 25:11
  Speaker 1: the story, of telling about his life and what has
• 25:18
  Speaker 1: led him up to the shitty decisions that he continues
• 25:26
  Speaker 1: to make. Listen, man, I'll tell you straight up, there
• 25:31
  Speaker 1: are people that are listening who are encouraging you to
• 25:38
  Speaker 1: get on a better road, to take advantage of the
• 25:41
  Speaker 1: endless resources that are in our community right here in
• 25:45
  Speaker 1: Berry City alone. There's also people that just don't believe
• 25:51
  Speaker 1: anything that you're saying.
• 25:54
  Speaker 2: That's a given.
• 25:56
  Speaker 1: They don't trust you, don't blame him, they never will.
• 26:00
  Speaker 1: And that your rap sheet is a mile long. I'm
• 26:06
  Speaker 1: not familiar with all the details of your rap sheet
• 26:10
  Speaker 1: other than aggressive panhandling. What do you look at as
• 26:21
  Speaker 1: aggressive panhandling? How do you define that? And I should
• 26:27
  Speaker 1: say to Nick here also that my intentions, and I'll
• 26:33
  Speaker 1: tell you this as well, Brandon, my intentions are to
• 26:38
  Speaker 1: follow your story a little bit more and to have
• 26:44
  Speaker 1: you back. Either I come to you, you come to me.
• 26:48
  Speaker 1: But man, I'll tell you, I'm going to hold you
• 26:52
  Speaker 1: accountable for everything that is coming out of your mouth
• 26:56
  Speaker 1: this morning. And our listeners are too. You're you're you're
• 27:03
  Speaker 1: brave enough to come in here and sit in front
• 27:05
  Speaker 1: of a microphone and say what you got to say.
• 27:08
  Speaker 1: But man, it's like, after saying what you're saying, when
• 27:12
  Speaker 1: people see you on the sidewalk, they're gonna know your
• 27:16
  Speaker 1: story and they're gonna know what you've said into these microphones,
• 27:21
  Speaker 1: and you're gonna hold yourself accountable. You're almost forced to.
• 27:26
  Speaker 2: No, That's that's why it is that fair unfair, That's
• 27:30
  Speaker 2: why I did it. Oh, put a stop to the panhandling.
• 27:36
  Speaker 1: It put a stop to your panhandling.
• 27:38
  Speaker 2: Yeah, there's no now that I'm saying admitting to the
• 27:42
  Speaker 2: things I've done and the lies.
• 27:44
  Speaker 1: And have you ever have you ever tried to get
• 27:48
  Speaker 1: into a in a running car with a woman and
• 27:50
  Speaker 1: a child sitting it?
• 27:57
  Speaker 2: I might have. There's been times where just as like
• 28:00
  Speaker 2: on a robot trip, I guess you could say, trying
• 28:04
  Speaker 2: to chase something.
• 28:05
  Speaker 1: Or have you been high on drugs during something like that?
• 28:10
  Speaker 2: Possibly?
• 28:15
  Speaker 1: I mean, I'll be the first person to tell you
• 28:19
  Speaker 1: you know, if I was in Barry or anywhere anywhere
• 28:28
  Speaker 1: and someone tried to get into my car.
• 28:34
  Speaker 2: Oh, get in the car.
• 28:36
  Speaker 1: Yeah no, okay, if someone ever tried to get into
• 28:39
  Speaker 1: my car with my especially with my kid in there,
• 28:45
  Speaker 1: wouldn't go well.
• 28:46
  Speaker 2: Yeah, no, no, no, I never tried getting in their car.
• 28:48
  Speaker 1: See there would be a mess.
• 28:51
  Speaker 2: I think during the fear. There's some people that scared
• 28:54
  Speaker 2: me because of the panhandling. They during fear assume that
• 29:01
  Speaker 2: that's what I was trying to do. Yeah, I've never
• 29:05
  Speaker 2: tried to getting into a car. See, no wonder why
• 29:07
  Speaker 2: there's some people that have called me a scumbag and
• 29:10
  Speaker 2: said that I did that, and even in a police
• 29:15
  Speaker 2: report tried breaking into a vehicle. I don't remember any
• 29:19
  Speaker 2: time trying to break into a vehicle, especially with a
• 29:24
  Speaker 2: lady and the child. Like, I don't understand that I.
• 29:28
  Speaker 1: Have a neighbor that has you on video trying to
• 29:32
  Speaker 1: get into one of his outbuildings. Is what one of
• 29:36
  Speaker 1: his outbuildings? Garatches Barns just sure it's me, Sure.
• 29:50
  Speaker 2: What street?
• 29:52
  Speaker 1: I'd rather not say, but it was it was a
• 29:56
  Speaker 1: very cold night and you were just wearing a sweatshirt, so.
• 30:02
  Speaker 2: You're talking about in Washington. No, I was knocking on
• 30:06
  Speaker 2: the garage door at numerous times, waiting. I wasn't trying
• 30:10
  Speaker 2: to get in.
• 30:11
  Speaker 1: So you've gone to people's homes and knocked on.
• 30:13
  Speaker 2: Just trying to get help to get back to town.
• 30:16
  Speaker 2: I was freezing, I was ditched. Everybody thought I was
• 30:20
  Speaker 2: up there just trying to panhandle. And there really there
• 30:23
  Speaker 2: are people that I have asked for money and I
• 30:25
  Speaker 2: actually use that money to get a ride back.
• 30:30
  Speaker 1: Yeah.
• 30:31
  Speaker 2: I mean that's a freaking long walk. Not to mention,
• 30:34
  Speaker 2: there's some parts of Vermont that you can get lost,
• 30:36
  Speaker 2: and that's one of those places. I didn't know it
• 30:38
  Speaker 2: very well.
• 30:40
  Speaker 1: This is a uh, this is a an ugly road
• 30:45
  Speaker 1: that you're on, buddy, I don't know. Do you realize
• 30:50
  Speaker 1: do you realize.
• 30:51
  Speaker 2: That it could get me shot?
• 30:54
  Speaker 1: Yeah?
• 30:54
  Speaker 2: Realized that it could get me killed? Yeah? Absolutely, I
• 31:00
  Speaker 2: do know that. That's why I'm doing There's nothing.
• 31:02
  Speaker 1: Yeah, there's nothing good about any of this. And I mean,
• 31:09
  Speaker 1: you know, I'm getting comments here that you're a pathological liar.
• 31:16
  Speaker 1: Do you know what pathological means?
• 31:22
  Speaker 2: Honestly? Like being called a pathological liar? I guess I
• 31:32
  Speaker 2: could agree with some of it. Because I I knew
• 31:38
  Speaker 2: that what I was saying sometimes it isn't true. I'm
• 31:43
  Speaker 2: not going to disagree with them.
• 31:45
  Speaker 1: Pathological is when you actually believe your own lies.
• 31:53
  Speaker 2: There has been things I've said that I have done
• 31:55
  Speaker 2: that with. Yes, it's just that you got to get
• 32:00
  Speaker 2: in that mode when you are panted, like panhandling. There's
• 32:05
  Speaker 2: people that hold signs over by the stores. That's only
• 32:08
  Speaker 2: difference between them and me is the sign. But it's
• 32:13
  Speaker 2: still a lie and they when you're homeless in panhandling,
• 32:18
  Speaker 2: it's almost like you got to believe your own lie
• 32:20
  Speaker 2: in order to get the story to stick. And it's stupid.
• 32:25
  Speaker 2: It's pathetic. I know it is. I'm ashamed of myself
• 32:28
  Speaker 2: honestly because I was a straight A student. I went
• 32:32
  Speaker 2: to college online, but I was a straight A student.
• 32:36
  Speaker 2: High honors in high school. Yeah, you could see me
• 32:40
  Speaker 2: on the honor roll in two thousand and eight, that little.
• 32:42
  Speaker 1: Oil Yeah two thousand and what.
• 32:47
  Speaker 2: Eight and two thousand and nine, Yeah, that's a that's
• 32:56
  Speaker 2: just a friend of mine.
• 32:57
  Speaker 1: You don't have anything to worry. Don't worry, I.
• 33:06
  Speaker 3: Said with you.
• 33:08
  Speaker 1: Sure, I don't grab that one. Customers, I don't know
• 33:18
  Speaker 1: if you've if you've had a chance to to listen
• 33:22
  Speaker 1: to any of this recks. But I mean, you know
• 33:24
  Speaker 1: the comments that are that are coming in this morning.
• 33:27
  Speaker 1: I mean there's either you're not gonna hurt me?
• 33:32
  Speaker 4: Are you promise.
• 33:35
  Speaker 2: You own the mm A jim up in grin.
• 33:37
  Speaker 4: I do not own the m A jim. I'm one
• 33:39
  Speaker 4: of the instructors, though Lucas John owns. I just teach
• 33:45
  Speaker 4: one of the teach a couple of the class.
• 33:46
  Speaker 1: Just bring that up, just a pinch.
• 33:50
  Speaker 4: All right, I don't want to break it.
• 33:52
  Speaker 1: I just uh, you know, there there are so many
• 33:59
  Speaker 1: there are so many opportunities these days, two that have
• 34:07
  Speaker 1: that present themselves here in this state. Services resources. Have
• 34:14
  Speaker 1: you ever tried any of them? Resources to better your life,
• 34:19
  Speaker 1: to better your life, to do something productive with your life.
• 34:24
  Speaker 2: I have tried some of the resources, folk Rehab, which
• 34:27
  Speaker 2: is now another program.
• 34:31
  Speaker 4: Have you ever gone a therapy? Have you ever talked
• 34:35
  Speaker 4: to somebody?
• 34:36
  Speaker 2: Yeah, I have a counselor I lost touch with after
• 34:41
  Speaker 2: my dad sister died, Bethany that like I completely lost
• 34:47
  Speaker 2: it to be honest mentally, so I just stopped coming
• 34:51
  Speaker 2: to see my counselor.
• 34:52
  Speaker 4: Honestly, I mean, JD can when I lost my mom,
• 34:56
  Speaker 4: the same with him when he lost his parents. That's
• 34:58
  Speaker 4: a that's a pretty trium thing in your life. Maybe
• 35:03
  Speaker 4: it's hard to get all the other resources if you
• 35:05
  Speaker 4: don't address the underlying issue there.
• 35:09
  Speaker 1: There are so many opportunities to work to have a
• 35:14
  Speaker 1: respectful job, not just here and Parry. But I mean,
• 35:18
  Speaker 1: you know, have you know we're getting a question here.
• 35:23
  Speaker 1: Have you admitted yourself to Valley Vesta? I want to
• 35:26
  Speaker 1: have you? Have you ever explored Value Vesta?
• 35:28
  Speaker 2: I've explored Valley Vista. There's a person in my life
• 35:32
  Speaker 2: here in town that would be left out there alone.
• 35:38
  Speaker 4: Yeah, but if you die the drug overdose, they're going
• 35:40
  Speaker 4: to be left out here alone. If you walking around
• 35:42
  Speaker 4: on the street and somebody somebody you know, finally loses
• 35:46
  Speaker 4: their ship or something like that and hurts you and
• 35:47
  Speaker 4: puts you in the hospital, they're going to lose you.
• 35:49
  Speaker 4: So think about it this way, my man. If you
• 35:52
  Speaker 4: are on a plane and you lose cabin pressure, what's
• 35:55
  Speaker 4: the first thing they.
• 35:56
  Speaker 2: Tell you put on.
• 35:58
  Speaker 4: The mask right before you put on a mask on
• 36:00
  Speaker 4: your kids, Because if you don't put that on and
• 36:02
  Speaker 4: you lose consciousness, you can't help anybody else. You have
• 36:05
  Speaker 4: to help yourself first before you help anyone else. You
• 36:08
  Speaker 4: can't be you can't be responsible for yourself. How are
• 36:10
  Speaker 4: you supposed to be responsible for somebody else? Don't put
• 36:13
  Speaker 4: that weight on your shoulders. You need to take care
• 36:15
  Speaker 4: of yourself first. That's a that's one hundred percent what
• 36:18
  Speaker 4: you have to do. It's we all have underlying issues,
• 36:23
  Speaker 4: and it's whether or not we're willing to have that
• 36:25
  Speaker 4: hard conversation with ourselves.
• 36:27
  Speaker 1: On He's spot on, man. I mean it's like, I
• 36:33
  Speaker 1: don't care. I don't care who I was in.
• 36:35
  Speaker 4: A motorcycle gang. I did drugs, I beat people up.
• 36:38
  Speaker 4: I was fucking shit bag. I'm fifty two years old.
• 36:41
  Speaker 4: So just no, life is not this. This is just
• 36:46
  Speaker 4: a fucking little spot. And you're dealing with your trauma
• 36:51
  Speaker 4: through drugs.
• 36:53
  Speaker 1: I get it. What kind of drugs are you doing? Brandon,
• 36:58
  Speaker 1: Crack and heroin?
• 37:00
  Speaker 4: So the way that that works, man, And this is
• 37:01
  Speaker 4: how a lot of my friends, I don't know how
• 37:03
  Speaker 4: it worked with you, but when they would start smoking
• 37:05
  Speaker 4: crack and you're wound out, you're fucking you're chasing that dragon.
• 37:08
  Speaker 4: You're you're looking for that bell Ringer. That first hit
• 37:11
  Speaker 4: is what gets you.
• 37:12
  Speaker 1: Right.
• 37:13
  Speaker 4: So now you've been up for days and now you
• 37:15
  Speaker 4: can't sleep, but you gotta go to work. Well, then
• 37:17
  Speaker 4: your buddy comes along, He's like, hey, just snort this,
• 37:19
  Speaker 4: you can go to sleep. Well. Wow, Now all of
• 37:22
  Speaker 4: a sudden, you could do your upper all weekend. Long
• 37:25
  Speaker 4: snort some fucking heroin or some opioids so you can sleep.
• 37:29
  Speaker 4: And then you can. Now you've gotten a little rest,
• 37:31
  Speaker 4: Now you're refreshed. Now it's time to smoke crack.
• 37:33
  Speaker 1: Am I wrong?
• 37:34
  Speaker 2: Is that?
• 37:37
  Speaker 4: Yeah? You're wound out, you're geeked out, you're fucking you
• 37:40
  Speaker 4: hate yourself and you just want to sleep and you
• 37:42
  Speaker 4: can't because you're thinking about everything your brain is going.
• 37:45
  Speaker 4: That's your that's your addictive personality. Now all of your trauma.
• 37:49
  Speaker 4: Now you think about all your fucking trauma going on,
• 37:52
  Speaker 4: and the easiest thing to do is a nice opioid,
• 37:55
  Speaker 4: a nice what heroin? Something to you?
• 37:57
  Speaker 1: Just gotta comment here, This could have been a prime
• 38:00
  Speaker 1: of a conversation if you really wanted to help, Not
• 38:03
  Speaker 1: for likes online. What the fuck?
• 38:10
  Speaker 4: I'm sorry? Have you ever talked to anybody like this?
• 38:16
  Speaker 4: Does this bother you?
• 38:16
  Speaker 1: That we're talking.
• 38:18
  Speaker 2: I've never done it. I've never done it out in
• 38:20
  Speaker 2: the open.
• 38:21
  Speaker 1: Jesus, I don't even know if Heather has ever once
• 38:25
  Speaker 1: listened to this podcast or anything that it's about. My
• 38:29
  Speaker 1: objective here, buddy, is not for fucking likes, No, I know.
• 38:35
  Speaker 1: My objective here is to have have you share your
• 38:40
  Speaker 1: story for what it is, for what it's worth. Because frankly,
• 38:47
  Speaker 1: the road that you're on right now, I wouldn't be
• 38:51
  Speaker 1: in the least bit surprised if in the near future
• 38:57
  Speaker 1: you weren't here anymore. I wouldn't be surprised at all.
• 39:04
  Speaker 1: But we got you captured here on this program telling
• 39:10
  Speaker 1: your story for what it is and for what it's
• 39:14
  Speaker 1: worth in the hope, with the objective that maybe it.
• 39:19
  Speaker 4: Will already talk to a counselor privately, maybe.
• 39:22
  Speaker 1: It will help somebody not go down the road that
• 39:28
  Speaker 1: you're going one hundred miles an hour on.
• 39:30
  Speaker 4: And you've done construction before because you work for my
• 39:34
  Speaker 4: buddy Timmy. You did some work for Timmy before, so
• 39:37
  Speaker 4: we know you can do it, but you were how
• 39:41
  Speaker 4: do you deal with No.
• 39:42
  Speaker 1: Heather, I'm not exploiting what what? Why do we have
• 39:46
  Speaker 1: to why do we have to why do we have
• 39:49
  Speaker 1: to deal with people that are accusing me a million views?
• 39:54
  Speaker 4: There's not always going to be what's that? Because you
• 39:57
  Speaker 4: get a million views, there's got to be at least
• 39:59
  Speaker 4: one weirdo out of all of it.
• 40:01
  Speaker 1: Not exploiting anyone, No, not at all.
• 40:04
  Speaker 4: I mean, I don't know. I just got here.
• 40:06
  Speaker 1: But Brandon, do you feel that I'm exploiting you?
• 40:10
  Speaker 2: No, it's giving me a chance to talk.
• 40:15
  Speaker 4: I think everybody should have to be able to talk
• 40:19
  Speaker 4: tell their Well, wait a minute, what about all the
• 40:21
  Speaker 4: people exploiting him online? The oh I've been carboed, I've
• 40:25
  Speaker 4: been you know what I mean? They talk about this
• 40:27
  Speaker 4: kid all the time online, But now that you're talking
• 40:31
  Speaker 4: to him personally, it's a it's an issue, right like
• 40:36
  Speaker 4: this is called did they forget what it's called. This
• 40:38
  Speaker 4: is called aired out? Right? Yeah, that's what it's called.
• 40:43
  Speaker 4: You're airing it out, and you know what, ignore them
• 40:47
  Speaker 4: people for right now? This is about those people right now,
• 40:50
  Speaker 4: don't even this is about him. Let's let's get to this.
• 40:53
  Speaker 4: So I want to ask you some questions. As a
• 40:58
  Speaker 4: self defense instructor, I che self defense. What do you
• 41:02
  Speaker 4: personally look for when you're gonna approach somebody and ask
• 41:06
  Speaker 4: for money. What what what characteristics or what do you
• 41:12
  Speaker 4: look for? Do you look for a weaker person? Would
• 41:15
  Speaker 4: you come up to me and ask me for money?
• 41:17
  Speaker 4: Would you aggressively ask me for money? I mean, I
• 41:21
  Speaker 4: don't care if you did, but I've been aggressed. I've
• 41:23
  Speaker 4: lived in cities around the world and panhandlers on every
• 41:26
  Speaker 4: single corner are relentless on chasing you down the street
• 41:29
  Speaker 4: trying to get cigarettes, money, whatever. So whatever your hustle.
• 41:33
  Speaker 2: Is, it doesn't matter really the person. I just yeah,
• 41:37
  Speaker 2: I'm not going to walk up to somebody that you
• 41:38
  Speaker 2: knows homeless, sir, right, okay, fair, But for the moment now,
• 41:43
  Speaker 2: if they tell you.
• 41:44
  Speaker 4: To get if they tell you, if if you walk
• 41:46
  Speaker 4: up to them, they say, get the fuck away from me,
• 41:48
  Speaker 4: I do, okay, because the way that it sounds online
• 41:54
  Speaker 4: is that you are like following people down and robbing
• 41:56
  Speaker 4: them at gunpoint using knives, and.
• 41:59
  Speaker 2: Yeah, and that's what I mean. I've never I'm a
• 42:02
  Speaker 2: I don't I've never, and you're or touched really any gun,
• 42:08
  Speaker 2: no knife. I can barely afford at this point the
• 42:13
  Speaker 2: clothes on my back, let alone a weapon.
• 42:15
  Speaker 4: You know why are you hearing Vermont? Then Vermont's a
• 42:18
  Speaker 4: hard place to live when you have a job.
• 42:20
  Speaker 2: I'm from here, my family's here. Mom needs me to
• 42:25
  Speaker 2: be changed myself.
• 42:28
  Speaker 4: But how is your mom dealing with the death of
• 42:30
  Speaker 4: your sisters? How is your mom.
• 42:33
  Speaker 2: Moved over to a countrytown and it's three years sober?
• 42:39
  Speaker 4: Can you imagine how your mom feels seeing you?
• 42:43
  Speaker 2: She's very sad.
• 42:45
  Speaker 4: One, I'm a parent, so am I My mom died,
• 42:58
  Speaker 4: she was I watched my mom overdose three times. My
• 43:00
  Speaker 4: best friend died from this ship. You guys have no
• 43:05
  Speaker 4: clue what you leave as a path behind you. It's
• 43:11
  Speaker 4: not something you think about it.
• 43:14
  Speaker 1: Uh yeah, you've got I mean you're only thirty four.
• 43:20
  Speaker 4: Dude, homely fuck dude, you.
• 43:24
  Speaker 1: The opportunity the time. I'll tell you right now, look
• 43:29
  Speaker 1: at me. There is no greater gift on God's green
• 43:35
  Speaker 1: Earth than time. Don't want thing you can't buy. Don't
• 43:42
  Speaker 1: ever forget that. You have time, which is the future,
• 43:49
  Speaker 1: to turn this ship around. That's your gift, and you
• 43:53
  Speaker 1: can do anything you want with that time. You can
• 43:56
  Speaker 1: make it worse.
• 44:00
  Speaker 2: I want to make it better. But anyways, I know
• 44:05
  Speaker 2: that I don't know what timing wise, you guys have
• 44:09
  Speaker 2: for this show, but I want to leave some questions
• 44:14
  Speaker 2: unanswered for the next time that I come in the
• 44:17
  Speaker 2: next time, so hopefully we can do a prequel to
• 44:21
  Speaker 2: this sequel sequel not prequel prequel, prequel that I meant sequel.
• 44:30
  Speaker 2: But anyways, is there what what do we have?
• 44:33
  Speaker 4: I mean, honestly, man, that's you need to address your trauma.
• 44:37
  Speaker 4: You need to address that, that's the root issue of
• 44:40
  Speaker 4: what's going on.
• 44:41
  Speaker 2: Well, I'm just gonna keep coming in periodically to just
• 44:46
  Speaker 2: you know, just see me change and proof change. I'm
• 44:49
  Speaker 2: gonna be checking in, check it out for your mother
• 44:53
  Speaker 2: for transformation. You guys are gonna see me do better
• 44:57
  Speaker 2: little by little and I'm gonna check in regularly on
• 45:00
  Speaker 2: the air if I'm allowed, and that way people can
• 45:04
  Speaker 2: see for themselves.
• 45:06
  Speaker 1: Do you do you do you take advantage of any
• 45:09
  Speaker 1: of the resources the the now from Capstone or or
• 45:14
  Speaker 1: the area of churches.
• 45:15
  Speaker 2: Or I am right now McFarland Capstone as well good
• 45:21
  Speaker 2: and I'm working with them both. So I just started
• 45:24
  Speaker 2: I feel.
• 45:25
  Speaker 4: That, Yeah, your boy Brody, that comes on here too.
• 45:31
  Speaker 1: You know, Amber Saskan, are you willing to head to
• 45:34
  Speaker 1: rehab today?
• 45:38
  Speaker 2: I'm doing and treatment associates. That's why I got my ID.
• 45:46
  Speaker 4: It's hard. You don't go just right into rehab. I
• 45:49
  Speaker 4: tried this with Edgar. It was so hard. People think
• 45:52
  Speaker 4: like you just ask for it and you get it.
• 45:55
  Speaker 4: They straight told him that he needed to get opioids
• 45:58
  Speaker 4: off the street until they could get him in probably
• 46:00
  Speaker 4: be six months, had to go through counseling, and in
• 46:03
  Speaker 4: the meantime they were like what, he goes what I'm
• 46:05
  Speaker 4: on it.
• 46:05
  Speaker 2: I'm doing a fourteenth month program called Treatment Court.
• 46:10
  Speaker 4: All the Treatment Court. Yeah, yeah, so what are you
• 46:13
  Speaker 4: doing for a right? Are you staying at the shelter?
• 46:18
  Speaker 4: What do you where? Do you stay.
• 46:21
  Speaker 2: Wherever?
• 46:23
  Speaker 4: Fair?
• 46:25
  Speaker 2: But anyways, if you're okay with it, I actually uh
• 46:28
  Speaker 2: got an appointment, very uh urgent appointment that I could address.
• 46:36
  Speaker 2: There's some legal things going on in my life, so
• 46:38
  Speaker 2: I do have to unfortunately cut it short. I just
• 46:42
  Speaker 2: wanted to be able to tell my story this time around,
• 46:44
  Speaker 2: and I will be back for people to listen.
• 46:47
  Speaker 1: Thanks for coming in here and doing that.
• 46:51
  Speaker 2: Not a problem. Thank you both.
• 46:53
  Speaker 4: Not everybody I know, but a lot of people were
• 46:59
  Speaker 4: and I can m you're the only one that could
• 47:02
  Speaker 4: change it.
• 47:03
  Speaker 2: That'll mean, I know people don't believe there's non believers there.
• 49:00
  Speaker 1: I'm not sure what uh what some of these yeah,
• 49:04
  Speaker 1: these comments are.
• 49:09
  Speaker 4: It's hard to be angry at a human being when
• 49:12
  Speaker 4: you see the personal side of them, isn't it.
• 49:15
  Speaker 1: Well, I just got a comment here that I'm seeing
• 49:19
  Speaker 1: here and I was just going to pull the plug
• 49:22
  Speaker 1: on this, But I'm like, you know what, huh, I
• 49:25
  Speaker 1: don't think so, why Chris Emmerson, Why delete my comments?
• 49:29
  Speaker 1: It's all facts. I haven't deleted any comments.
• 49:32
  Speaker 4: Are we online, we're live, We're live. Oh. I came
• 49:37
  Speaker 4: in a little late on that.
• 49:39
  Speaker 1: JD but I wasn't expecting you to you to come
• 49:44
  Speaker 1: on the mic, right, But yeah, uh, you know the
• 49:53
  Speaker 1: last thing I'm I'm I'm doing rex my my, my
• 49:58
  Speaker 1: motivation behind.
• 50:01
  Speaker 4: You know what? It really bothers people, the personal side.
• 50:04
  Speaker 4: It's so easy to be angry at somebody you don't know.
• 50:08
  Speaker 4: It's really hard to stay angry once you hear the
• 50:12
  Speaker 4: personal side of it, and he admits to it, he
• 50:15
  Speaker 4: knows what he's doing, he knows, but people don't want
• 50:22
  Speaker 4: to hear that personal side.
• 50:23
  Speaker 1: Can I So we got to Alyssa, Can I ask
• 50:26
  Speaker 1: what the purpose of having him on was, and she
• 50:31
  Speaker 1: says exactly, I missed a lot of this. Please go
• 50:34
  Speaker 1: back and rewatch this. Yeah, absolutely, watch it, Melissa. The
• 50:39
  Speaker 1: purpose of having.
• 50:42
  Speaker 4: Let's put rumors and miss to everything has been blown
• 50:46
  Speaker 4: out of proportion.
• 50:47
  Speaker 1: In my mind. Yeah, listen. The purpose of having him.
• 50:50
  Speaker 4: On is he could tell his personal story.
• 50:53
  Speaker 1: Is to tell his story. And I understand Judy and
• 50:57
  Speaker 1: others that, uh, you know that there's some line that's
• 51:02
  Speaker 1: going on here. I mean, nobody is justifying what not
• 51:08
  Speaker 1: justifying anything, and I'm not. I'm also not exploiting him,
• 51:11
  Speaker 1: but I will have someone on if they are willing
• 51:16
  Speaker 1: to come on and share their story.
• 51:21
  Speaker 4: Wait a minute, but but wait a minute.
• 51:25
  Speaker 1: My god.
• 51:26
  Speaker 4: I mean that's this is a problem in the community.
• 51:30
  Speaker 4: You just became proactive to talk to the person who's
• 51:35
  Speaker 4: creating the problem in the community.
• 51:37
  Speaker 1: Right, How how is that a bad thing?
• 51:42
  Speaker 4: Nobody is doing that?
• 51:44
  Speaker 1: You know.
• 51:47
  Speaker 4: Instead, they're online, they're gonna sell T shirts that says
• 51:50
  Speaker 4: I've been carboded. They're not. They're they're gonna watch out
• 51:54
  Speaker 4: the guys here. What you just you took an approach,
• 51:59
  Speaker 4: like a human approach to address the guy. I don't
• 52:03
  Speaker 4: see what the problem is with that. Yeah, I guess
• 52:07
  Speaker 4: I'm just too woke. You're too woke. I I here's
• 52:13
  Speaker 4: the awakening, motherfuckers.
• 52:14
  Speaker 1: I I was. I'm hoping that the people that are
• 52:21
  Speaker 1: watching and listening that they at least get a chance
• 52:26
  Speaker 1: to hear his story, whether they believe it or not,
• 52:30
  Speaker 1: at least give him an opportunity to listen. I've reached
• 52:34
  Speaker 1: out to Officer McCowan. M he's not not able to
• 52:42
  Speaker 1: come on there.
• 52:43
  Speaker 4: That's the thing. That's that's it is what it is.
• 52:47
  Speaker 4: But you also heard him. He's never put his hands
• 52:51
  Speaker 4: on somebody. He's never been violent. So literally, if he
• 52:54
  Speaker 4: walks up to you and asks for money, say get
• 52:56
  Speaker 4: away from me, leave me alone.
• 52:58
  Speaker 1: So listen saying he needs help, wish you could have
• 53:02
  Speaker 1: helped him.
• 53:04
  Speaker 4: We're trying.
• 53:05
  Speaker 1: That's that's what we're doing.
• 53:07
  Speaker 4: We're trying. We're trying to point him to resources. That's
• 53:10
  Speaker 4: what we're doing, stay active with him and making sure
• 53:12
  Speaker 4: that he's sticking with this plan. He just told us
• 53:14
  Speaker 4: he went under the fourteen month treatment plan. He's trying
• 53:17
  Speaker 4: to do something right now. But if he doesn't deal
• 53:21
  Speaker 4: with the trauma of losing.
• 53:25
  Speaker 1: Right he's in treatment court. And he's also.
• 53:29
  Speaker 4: How does other people deal with trauma, this type of trauma,
• 53:33
  Speaker 4: Like I feel like people that judge other people have
• 53:36
  Speaker 4: never dealt with a serious trauma in their life, never
• 53:39
  Speaker 4: seen someone die, never lost someone really close to them,
• 53:43
  Speaker 4: never was abused, never was a molested. Yea, So all
• 53:47
  Speaker 4: of those things manifest in different ways for everybody, whether
• 53:52
  Speaker 4: they become so the biggest thing that everybody does is well,
• 53:56
  Speaker 4: drinking is legal. Well, you're still coping with yours with
• 54:00
  Speaker 4: a drug, whether it's a legal drug or illegal drugs,
• 54:04
  Speaker 4: you're doing the exact same thing. You're you're using drugs
• 54:09
  Speaker 4: as a coping skill. And that's really what they need
• 54:12
  Speaker 4: to do, is they need to learn. I had to
• 54:13
  Speaker 4: go to counseling, man. I was off the fucking rails
• 54:16
  Speaker 4: when my mother died. You know, I had to talk
• 54:21
  Speaker 4: to somebody. But you know, someone is that kid like that.
• 54:25
  Speaker 4: You could throw him on the street and and have
• 54:27
  Speaker 4: nobody like you to actually even acknowledge that he's a
• 54:30
  Speaker 4: human being, and then what he's never You're gonna find
• 54:35
  Speaker 4: him dead in the street. But maybe maybe by bringing
• 54:38
  Speaker 4: him on to here, maybe that alone, well he'll see
• 54:41
  Speaker 4: that not all humans I don't know, man, I don't know.
• 54:46
  Speaker 4: It's just.
• 54:51
  Speaker 1: Listen. I mean.
• 54:54
  Speaker 4: I never met Okay, so I never met the guy,
• 54:56
  Speaker 4: and I alls I heard with the stories, I thought
• 54:59
  Speaker 4: that this guy was like grabbing little old ladies, throwing
• 55:01
  Speaker 4: them to the ground and stealing their wallets.
• 55:03
  Speaker 1: And I've heard, I've heard plenty of stories that are
• 55:08
  Speaker 1: pretty outrageous, like that about Brandon Carvo.
• 55:12
  Speaker 4: He's like one hundred pounds, dude, He's sitting here next
• 55:14
  Speaker 4: to me. There's you could literally break him in two
• 55:17
  Speaker 4: with one hand.
• 55:18
  Speaker 1: You know, why, what's what's Maybe that stuff is is happening.
• 55:24
  Speaker 1: I don't know, maybe it's not. I mean, stories are
• 55:27
  Speaker 1: that they're they're the law enforcement.
• 55:29
  Speaker 4: Can't do any law enforcement can't do anything because he's
• 55:31
  Speaker 4: non violent, hasn't and he's so he's he's non violent,
• 55:37
  Speaker 4: So the law enforcement can't do anything. So how does
• 55:40
  Speaker 4: the community do something? Do we just bitch about it?
• 55:43
  Speaker 4: Or do we become proactive and try to do something,
• 55:46
  Speaker 4: try to help our community.
• 55:49
  Speaker 1: That's what I was trying to do this morning. What's that?
• 55:53
  Speaker 3: I thought it was fantastic you had him on. I
• 55:54
  Speaker 3: don't know you had him on. I'm paying attention to
• 55:56
  Speaker 3: things now all the week, and you send me a
• 55:57
  Speaker 3: message earlier, and so I tuned in. I was walking.
• 56:00
  Speaker 3: I'm usually walking a time, so it's hard for me
• 56:02
  Speaker 3: to watch, but so I had to help hold my
• 56:04
  Speaker 3: phone with the YouTube open so I could listen to it.
• 56:06
  Speaker 3: That was good. It's a little confrontational, but that's the
• 56:09
  Speaker 3: way it's going to be. It has to be. But
• 56:11
  Speaker 3: the fact that he came in here on his own,
• 56:12
  Speaker 3: it's not like you guys are exploiting and were taking
• 56:14
  Speaker 3: advantage of him. He made the invitation, he came in,
• 56:16
  Speaker 3: he aired it out, he got the opportunity to talk.
• 56:18
  Speaker 3: Like Rex has been saying, everyone's going on these stories
• 56:21
  Speaker 3: and the's rooms. I haven't seen this guy ever before
• 56:23
  Speaker 3: in my life. I just watched him walk away. Looks depressed,
• 56:27
  Speaker 3: It sounds depressed. I'll listen to him, and obviously he's
• 56:29
  Speaker 3: got some things that that would be depressing. But you know,
• 56:33
  Speaker 3: so you hear all the stories and stuff, but then yeah,
• 56:35
  Speaker 3: come in here and tell your tell your side of it.
• 56:37
  Speaker 4: What's that old saying, man walk a mile.
• 56:39
  Speaker 2: In my shoes?
• 56:40
  Speaker 4: Yes, right, walking that kid's shoes. I just yeah, well listen,
• 56:45
  Speaker 4: and once again I'm not justifying a fucking thing that
• 56:47
  Speaker 4: this guy did, of course, just people need to see
• 56:50
  Speaker 4: the human side of it.
• 56:51
  Speaker 3: Yeah, I think yeah. He said, if it's easy to
• 56:55
  Speaker 3: hate somebody if you don't know them, imagine.
• 56:57
  Speaker 4: If the community came together and like, hey, we see
• 56:59
  Speaker 4: you man.
• 57:00
  Speaker 1: Yeah, well look Henry. People have seen him now this morning.
• 57:06
  Speaker 3: Right right, and this could make a huge difference. Now,
• 57:08
  Speaker 3: I saw someone coming out of the door. They're probably
• 57:11
  Speaker 3: listening to I assume they were listening, because it looked
• 57:13
  Speaker 3: like they came out and it looked directly down this
• 57:15
  Speaker 3: way and it looked down that way, and then said
• 57:17
  Speaker 3: something to each other. I think they know that they
• 57:19
  Speaker 3: were watching to see him come out of the studio,
• 57:22
  Speaker 3: just as.
• 57:22
  Speaker 4: The messages you got earlier, people were telling you that
• 57:26
  Speaker 4: the guy was going to stab you, he was going
• 57:28
  Speaker 4: to kill you, he was going to be violent. It
• 57:30
  Speaker 4: was going to be and then we come in and
• 57:32
  Speaker 4: here's this passive, depressed, trauma filled fucking kid.
• 57:37
  Speaker 3: Huh with the myth is bigger than the man kind
• 57:41
  Speaker 3: of thing like that. That's what everybody said. Everybody worked
• 57:43
  Speaker 3: it up into this big deal.
• 57:44
  Speaker 4: But dude, there's like the rumors about me, like how
• 57:47
  Speaker 4: I satisfy ten women at a time. They're not true.
• 57:51
  Speaker 3: Well maybe you couldn't do that.
• 57:53
  Speaker 1: You know, comment here Brandon is about power and control.
• 57:59
  Speaker 3: But based on what Yeah, see, that's that's the That's
• 58:02
  Speaker 3: the thing. It's so easy to to do this, to
• 58:05
  Speaker 3: armchair psychoanalyze anybody. I mean, this is my job and
• 58:08
  Speaker 3: I don't even do that. I don't know this kid.
• 58:11
  Speaker 3: How can I say anything about him until you keeps kid?
• 58:14
  Speaker 3: He's thirty four, only ten yars anger and made it
• 58:17
  Speaker 3: once you get to a certain days a kid, right, Yeah,
• 58:19
  Speaker 3: but I mean, I don't know. That's kind of I
• 58:21
  Speaker 3: feel like it's And the sad.
• 58:23
  Speaker 4: Thing is is, you know, I've had so many friends
• 58:25
  Speaker 4: I've had, like I said, my mom died, my best
• 58:27
  Speaker 4: friend and a lot of them people if you reach
• 58:32
  Speaker 4: out to them, that's just to know that somebody, I
• 58:37
  Speaker 4: don't know, it means a lot to them. But that
• 58:40
  Speaker 4: might be the thing if if if you kick a
• 58:43
  Speaker 4: dog and you just continually kick them or you give
• 58:46
  Speaker 4: them a treat, how are they you know, how are
• 58:48
  Speaker 4: they going to react? If the community what's the point
• 58:53
  Speaker 4: if the community If the whole community projects or the
• 58:56
  Speaker 4: whole community hates him. What's the point let me as
• 58:58
  Speaker 4: well just stay up?
• 58:59
  Speaker 1: Yeah, exactly, Well continue down to There's so many comments here,
• 59:02
  Speaker 1: I mean I can't keep up with them. But the
• 59:04
  Speaker 1: last sentences. You know, people are concerned for their safety
• 59:08
  Speaker 1: and right rightfully, So sure, I mean I do. I
• 59:12
  Speaker 1: don't think he's I don't think he's stabbed or shot anyone,
• 59:15
  Speaker 1: but I mean he's.
• 59:16
  Speaker 4: But how desperate does he have to become before someone.
• 59:19
  Speaker 3: Design to have to become?
• 59:21
  Speaker 4: Absolutely JD.
• 59:22
  Speaker 3: We everyone has potential to do this. This is back
• 59:24
  Speaker 3: when I was in college and learning about.
• 59:26
  Speaker 4: So what do you make for preventive meetenance? Yeah?
• 59:28
  Speaker 3: Right, that's the minority report. I don't want to live
• 59:30
  Speaker 3: in that world. But you know what's the difference between
• 59:32
  Speaker 3: me and Hitler? Opportunity? You know, reach audience, you know.
• 59:38
  Speaker 4: Just sit back behind a computer and judge people.
• 59:42
  Speaker 3: It's just so much easier, right, It's a lot easier.
• 59:45
  Speaker 2: Yeah.
• 59:45
  Speaker 4: That's like the whole thing about the good decisions and
• 59:47
  Speaker 4: bad decisions. Every single day we were forced with choices
• 59:50
  Speaker 4: in our life. The good decisions are usually the hard ones,
• 59:54
  Speaker 4: the bad decisions are super easy to.
• 59:56
  Speaker 3: Make well, and the good ones that are difficult to
• 59:58
  Speaker 3: make difficult to follow through it. Become the best teachers
• 1:00:00
  Speaker 3: in your life. They're the ones that help you to
• 1:00:02
  Speaker 3: overcome the challenges.
• 1:00:03
  Speaker 4: I was.
• 1:00:03
  Speaker 3: I like the analogy. We're being refined our our soul,
• 1:00:06
  Speaker 3: your person, whoever, whatever, whatever language you like to use
• 1:00:09
  Speaker 3: for identity, and you're identifying yourself, you're being refined. Is
• 1:00:12
  Speaker 3: what happens to metal when you refine it? You put
• 1:00:14
  Speaker 3: into super hot heat and melts. What happens to you
• 1:00:17
  Speaker 3: do wood work?
• 1:00:18
  Speaker 2: Stuff?
• 1:00:18
  Speaker 3: Like what you're refining a piece of wood? What do
• 1:00:20
  Speaker 3: you do to it?
• 1:00:20
  Speaker 2: You stand it?
• 1:00:21
  Speaker 4: See how you send it through the planer?
• 1:00:23
  Speaker 3: Yeah, put yourself through a planer, right yourself through sandpaper?
• 1:00:26
  Speaker 3: That's painful. Listen the refining process.
• 1:00:29
  Speaker 4: How about if we just start relating to each other.
• 1:00:31
  Speaker 4: That's the thing. So here's twenty twenty five. We we
• 1:00:35
  Speaker 4: all just want to be right. How about what? Why
• 1:00:37
  Speaker 4: do will we find things we can relate to each other?
• 1:00:39
  Speaker 1: Yeah? Absolutely, be a lot easy.
• 1:00:40
  Speaker 4: That would be like make for a better community. Like
• 1:00:44
  Speaker 4: hey man, yeah, I don't have any money, and I'm
• 1:00:46
  Speaker 4: not going to give you any money because I know
• 1:00:47
  Speaker 4: you're going to do drugs. Get help say that to them?
• 1:00:51
  Speaker 3: Yeah, or just Hi, I hope you have a better day.
• 1:00:54
  Speaker 3: Hope you have a good day. Whatever. Nothing, absolutely nothing, yeah.
• 1:00:59
  Speaker 4: Zero, And it makes you feel better, Like, what is
• 1:01:02
  Speaker 4: it how those people that are so angry about you
• 1:01:05
  Speaker 4: exploiting or whatever it is, they're just angry. How does
• 1:01:08
  Speaker 4: that make you feel angry? You're angry? It takes so much.
• 1:01:11
  Speaker 1: Energy to me. I'm not in any way, shape or
• 1:01:15
  Speaker 1: form suggesting.
• 1:01:17
  Speaker 5: Uh.
• 1:01:19
  Speaker 1: The reasoning behind me having him on the air is
• 1:01:25
  Speaker 1: to demonstrate that he's a good dude.
• 1:01:29
  Speaker 4: No. No, he admitted he knows he's not a good
• 1:01:32
  Speaker 4: and I'd be like me saying I'm a good dude
• 1:01:34
  Speaker 4: and I.
• 1:01:34
  Speaker 2: Know I'm not.
• 1:01:36
  Speaker 1: The opportunity. I mean, he even admitted that he's a
• 1:01:40
  Speaker 1: pathological liar.
• 1:01:43
  Speaker 4: I mean but that so once again that's going to
• 1:01:46
  Speaker 4: go about you. You're he's not addressing the underlying issues
• 1:01:50
  Speaker 4: of his trauma. First thing, So kids, that's the first
• 1:01:53
  Speaker 4: thing that they do is become liars. Why do they
• 1:01:55
  Speaker 4: become a liar because they're so afraid of disappointing that parent.
• 1:01:59
  Speaker 4: That means a funk.
• 1:02:00
  Speaker 1: Out of that. Yeah, to protect themselves.
• 1:02:02
  Speaker 4: Yep, it's it's a protection mechanism. Yeah, I'm gonna start lying.
• 1:02:07
  Speaker 4: That's my go to is the lie, you know, I.
• 1:02:11
  Speaker 1: Just I just.
• 1:02:16
  Speaker 3: No boy, all right, I gotta go. You can take
• 1:02:19
  Speaker 3: you can take my seat. But go on YouTube after school,
• 1:02:22
  Speaker 3: the channel after school after an s K O O
• 1:02:24
  Speaker 3: L after school, and they got a videos came out
• 1:02:27
  Speaker 3: a couple of days ago about mastering your emotions. Fantastic watching.
• 1:02:30
  Speaker 1: All right, I will see any uh, bro, you gotta
• 1:02:34
  Speaker 1: come on, you gotta sit down. Please, let's just do it.
• 1:02:40
  Speaker 1: Just do it, man. I seriously could not have imagine
• 1:02:47
  Speaker 1: this Friday, imagine this this Friday morning going the way
• 1:02:51
  Speaker 1: it's going. But just pull that mic right up close
• 1:02:54
  Speaker 1: to you, Jerry right there, yeah, so we can hear you.
• 1:02:59
  Speaker 1: This is a guy that this is a guy that
• 1:03:02
  Speaker 1: I have wanted to have on the air for a
• 1:03:05
  Speaker 1: long long time. Just bring it around if you can,
• 1:03:09
  Speaker 1: so that yes, Jerry Portress is just stumbled into the studio.
• 1:03:18
  Speaker 5: This thing out of my face.
• 1:03:19
  Speaker 1: Listen. Did you get a chance to hear?
• 1:03:24
  Speaker 5: And he did not go out to get high. He
• 1:03:26
  Speaker 5: actually went down to the good Shepherd Carbo Chris left.
• 1:03:30
  Speaker 5: You saw you're still on the topic, right, Oh yeah, yeah.
• 1:03:33
  Speaker 5: My nephew called me and said that they were that
• 1:03:36
  Speaker 5: he was on, and I was actually quite surprised, quite excited, everybody.
• 1:03:42
  Speaker 5: I'm really glad, and I was trying to get down
• 1:03:44
  Speaker 5: here before he left. But then I saw him going
• 1:03:47
  Speaker 5: between the wellness Center and Good Shepherd. So at least
• 1:03:50
  Speaker 5: he's going to a place that maybe he did not have
• 1:03:53
  Speaker 5: an appointment. Maybe he's looking for help, because all I
• 1:03:57
  Speaker 5: was going to do is tell him that a don't
• 1:04:00
  Speaker 5: gamble your life away. He needs to get a job,
• 1:04:08
  Speaker 5: go there, or you're gonna keep getting newspaper articles about you. Okay,
• 1:04:16
  Speaker 5: And the best place to go to get you hooked
• 1:04:19
  Speaker 5: up with everywhere is here, so Washington County Metal Health
• 1:04:26
  Speaker 5: Services Or is this my playboy hat?
• 1:04:28
  Speaker 4: That's not the playboy Yeah, it's It's definitely something that
• 1:04:34
  Speaker 4: he needs to He definitely needs to sit down and
• 1:04:38
  Speaker 4: talk to to somebody. He needs to work through those
• 1:04:41
  Speaker 4: You can he could go get a job today, he
• 1:04:43
  Speaker 4: could go get rehab, he could go get all of
• 1:04:45
  Speaker 4: that stuff, and all of it's gonna fail if he
• 1:04:48
  Speaker 4: does not fix the foundational problems. You can fix the
• 1:04:51
  Speaker 4: roof on your you can fix the roof on your house.
• 1:04:53
  Speaker 4: You can fix the siting on your house. But if
• 1:04:55
  Speaker 4: you don't ever fix that foundation, it's still gonna fall down.
• 1:04:58
  Speaker 5: And there's help out there every where you know you
• 1:05:01
  Speaker 5: just need. And that just doesn't go for Caibal, goes
• 1:05:03
  Speaker 5: for everybody that's out there on the street struggling with
• 1:05:05
  Speaker 5: drugs or or homeless or so hard it.
• 1:05:08
  Speaker 4: Really is because we've we've got the whole criminality thing
• 1:05:13
  Speaker 4: with drugs, and so instead of a public health crisis,
• 1:05:18
  Speaker 4: it's a it's a criminal crisis. We have two we
• 1:05:21
  Speaker 4: have twenty two million people in prison because of nonviolent
• 1:05:25
  Speaker 4: drugs right now. The next closest country is Russia with
• 1:05:29
  Speaker 4: six hundred and fifty thousand. The next one behind that
• 1:05:31
  Speaker 4: is India with three hundred thousand. They have billions of
• 1:05:35
  Speaker 4: people we and I'm not talking about so everybody could
• 1:05:39
  Speaker 4: they say, well, you can't you if they people don't
• 1:05:41
  Speaker 4: want help, they won't get it. Well, most people want help.
• 1:05:45
  Speaker 4: The problem is the help that is offered is through
• 1:05:49
  Speaker 4: you know, the criminal. Here we go, we're going to
• 1:05:51
  Speaker 4: send you to a fourteen day We're going to send
• 1:05:53
  Speaker 4: you to a thirty day rehab and then they have
• 1:05:55
  Speaker 4: a ninety percent rate of reoffending. So well we know
• 1:06:01
  Speaker 4: that in other countries. Number one. There, it shouldn't be
• 1:06:04
  Speaker 4: a fourteen day, it should be like a minimum one
• 1:06:06
  Speaker 4: hundred and twenty day with a follow up for the
• 1:06:09
  Speaker 4: next two years to after you're out in order to
• 1:06:13
  Speaker 4: help you. Gots the only way that you're going.
• 1:06:14
  Speaker 5: And then once you get out, you have to have
• 1:06:16
  Speaker 5: a soft handoff to the programs of a lot of
• 1:06:18
  Speaker 5: person you get on the street and right now they're
• 1:06:20
  Speaker 5: just it's like Valley Vista. God bless them, but they're
• 1:06:24
  Speaker 5: busy and they have to shorten their stays because there's
• 1:06:28
  Speaker 5: just so many people that need to get in there,
• 1:06:29
  Speaker 5: and they're trying to help more people. But that's it.
• 1:06:32
  Speaker 4: Get rid of the DA, get rid of our private prisons,
• 1:06:35
  Speaker 4: open up rehabs because healthy people. So that's the other
• 1:06:38
  Speaker 4: thing they said, Well, just have tougher laws. Okay, great,
• 1:06:42
  Speaker 4: you could put a death penalty on drugs. Drug addicts
• 1:06:45
  Speaker 4: and drug dealers are still going to sell drugs. They're
• 1:06:47
  Speaker 4: still going to do it. They're still going to take
• 1:06:48
  Speaker 4: that chance. But now what you're going to do is
• 1:06:50
  Speaker 4: you're going to make it even more violent because the
• 1:06:52
  Speaker 4: money's going to be even higher because of the risk.
• 1:06:55
  Speaker 4: You can take a drug dealer out. You can put
• 1:06:57
  Speaker 4: them in jail, There'll be ten more that are going
• 1:06:58
  Speaker 4: to take its place.
• 1:06:59
  Speaker 5: Especially when and that happens, they have the revolving door
• 1:07:02
  Speaker 5: down here in mainstream.
• 1:07:03
  Speaker 4: So what do you what do you do? What stops
• 1:07:06
  Speaker 4: a drug dealer when there's no more demand it.
• 1:07:11
  Speaker 5: Which in an ideal world that would be.
• 1:07:14
  Speaker 4: They do it in other countries.
• 1:07:16
  Speaker 1: Comment here. He's been offered real help over the years
• 1:07:20
  Speaker 1: by us that have known him for years. He refuses
• 1:07:24
  Speaker 1: any kind of real help.
• 1:07:26
  Speaker 4: What is real help to you? And what is real
• 1:07:28
  Speaker 4: help to him? I don't know who this person is,
• 1:07:30
  Speaker 4: So what real help? Have you offered a ride to
• 1:07:34
  Speaker 4: a counselor to pay for a counselor so we could
• 1:07:36
  Speaker 4: deal with this trauma? What? What is real help? That's
• 1:07:39
  Speaker 4: I think that's the I think that's the thing is
• 1:07:41
  Speaker 4: we all have our own perception of what real help is.
• 1:07:44
  Speaker 4: What really could help somebody.
• 1:07:45
  Speaker 5: Well problems around Lately, there's more programs to help people
• 1:07:51
  Speaker 5: now than ever before in this area. Whenever he asks
• 1:07:54
  Speaker 5: me for money, my initial reaction is I don't carry cash,
• 1:07:58
  Speaker 5: And then I offered it to you know, give him help,
• 1:08:01
  Speaker 5: and then he just walks away, So you have to
• 1:08:04
  Speaker 5: want help before you can actually get help. And he's
• 1:08:08
  Speaker 5: I don't know.
• 1:08:11
  Speaker 4: What I little.
• 1:08:11
  Speaker 5: I saw on my way in here, not watching it
• 1:08:15
  Speaker 5: while I was driving, that's for sure. And he looked
• 1:08:22
  Speaker 5: and he spoke pretty decently. I mean, it's and when
• 1:08:26
  Speaker 5: he approaches you for money, he also does that, which
• 1:08:29
  Speaker 5: is the con artisry part of his personality.
• 1:08:31
  Speaker 4: Yes, yeah, that's his hustle and it is.
• 1:08:34
  Speaker 5: And you know what, twenty some odd years ago, I
• 1:08:37
  Speaker 5: would have applauded that because of the lifestyle I lived
• 1:08:43
  Speaker 5: to get out of it, and you have to want
• 1:08:45
  Speaker 5: it yourself. I would have never got clean, I would
• 1:08:47
  Speaker 5: have never got sober. I would have never got a
• 1:08:49
  Speaker 5: regular job. I would have never done any of that
• 1:08:51
  Speaker 5: stuff unless I wanted to. So the bottom line is,
• 1:08:53
  Speaker 5: if he doesn't want to, the only alternative is to
• 1:08:57
  Speaker 5: put up with him and then wait for him to
• 1:08:59
  Speaker 5: do something that he to jail for. And that's sad
• 1:09:02
  Speaker 5: and that shouldn't be happening, you know.
• 1:09:04
  Speaker 4: And that's the way our system is right now. You
• 1:09:06
  Speaker 4: have that. We only had that. Like I said, you
• 1:09:09
  Speaker 4: can all these resources are still limited resources. They are
• 1:09:14
  Speaker 4: not a cure. They're a to me. They're a money
• 1:09:17
  Speaker 4: grab get you in, get you. I just I don't know,
• 1:09:21
  Speaker 4: because they're not trying to really cure the problem, because
• 1:09:24
  Speaker 4: we know in other countries they have cured the problem. Yeah,
• 1:09:29
  Speaker 4: it's it's like, I don't know, double edged sword.
• 1:09:33
  Speaker 5: Bringing up bringing up mathdonea is a really hot topic
• 1:09:36
  Speaker 5: around this area. I mean, there's over five hundred people
• 1:09:38
  Speaker 5: at the Hub and Berlin that go to get their
• 1:09:40
  Speaker 5: mathdone and it's it's a business, and I get that,
• 1:09:45
  Speaker 5: but there's not enough counselors to support the amount of
• 1:09:48
  Speaker 5: people that are getting there dosing up there.
• 1:09:50
  Speaker 4: They didn't have a DA, and we didn't have them
• 1:09:52
  Speaker 4: private prisons with twenty two million people, we'd have plenty
• 1:09:55
  Speaker 4: of money to have counselors. Ye, look at the budgets
• 1:09:58
  Speaker 4: that the DA has for what's It's a difficult it's
• 1:10:03
  Speaker 4: a difficult job to have anyway to help people because
• 1:10:09
  Speaker 4: again a lot of people are doing it because they
• 1:10:11
  Speaker 4: want to stay out of jail.
• 1:10:11
  Speaker 5: A lot of people are doing it because they're forced
• 1:10:13
  Speaker 5: if somebody else want them to do it, or they
• 1:10:16
  Speaker 5: think this will get me out of trouble.
• 1:10:19
  Speaker 4: I mean, you know, we we tried so many times
• 1:10:22
  Speaker 4: and it just.
• 1:10:23
  Speaker 5: Over and over again. Yeah, got me too, I really do.
• 1:10:28
  Speaker 1: Jerry. What's what's your your your story, your your experience.
• 1:10:32
  Speaker 5: My lawyer told me not to tell that on to you.
• 1:10:34
  Speaker 1: Of course, of course this is a road that you
• 1:10:41
  Speaker 1: are somewhat familiar with.
• 1:10:44
  Speaker 5: Am I pixelated?
• 1:10:45
  Speaker 1: You're not pixelated? We have a clear and be careful,
• 1:10:49
  Speaker 1: Donnis listening.
• 1:10:51
  Speaker 5: So I was born a poor child in the middle
• 1:10:55
  Speaker 5: of a pumpkin patch.
• 1:10:57
  Speaker 1: Geez, and the there's probably some No.
• 1:11:00
  Speaker 5: I was a trouble kid, run away. I kept running away,
• 1:11:04
  Speaker 5: stayed in school for some reason. I liked or learning,
• 1:11:08
  Speaker 5: still do. But you know, you get that self perception
• 1:11:13
  Speaker 5: of yourself or you're not good enough for anything, and
• 1:11:15
  Speaker 5: you feel bad and then you go looking for acceptance somewhere.
• 1:11:18
  Speaker 5: And my acceptance came with people that really didn't care
• 1:11:22
  Speaker 5: about me, but because they didn't beerate me or ground
• 1:11:27
  Speaker 5: me or beat on me, I thought they were my friends.
• 1:11:30
  Speaker 5: Those happened to be, you know, drug dealers and people
• 1:11:34
  Speaker 5: in that lifestyle, and I think it just more gravitated
• 1:11:36
  Speaker 5: toward that.
• 1:11:37
  Speaker 1: Ah Man.
• 1:11:38
  Speaker 4: Just that just brought it up. I remember Edgar brought
• 1:11:41
  Speaker 4: a fucking dealer to my house to get his paycheck
• 1:11:44
  Speaker 4: one day and I walked right out there and I
• 1:11:46
  Speaker 4: grabbed a hold that guy. I tried yarding him out
• 1:11:49
  Speaker 4: of his truck, and the guy's like, what is he doing?
• 1:11:52
  Speaker 4: I was like, Edgar, these people are not your fucking friends.
• 1:11:55
  Speaker 4: The only reason that motherfucker's in the truck with you
• 1:11:58
  Speaker 4: right now is because you got my and you guys
• 1:12:00
  Speaker 4: are going to get drugs together. And the guys like,
• 1:12:03
  Speaker 4: does you know And Edgar looked at me and goes, no,
• 1:12:05
  Speaker 4: he's really going to beat you up. We should probably leave.
• 1:12:07
  Speaker 4: I was like, don't ever bring them up here again, man,
• 1:12:10
  Speaker 4: just and it was it was always those people. And
• 1:12:15
  Speaker 4: you know what, guess who is not at his funeral.
• 1:12:18
  Speaker 4: Not a one of them motherfuckers was a beggar's funeral.
• 1:12:22
  Speaker 4: All of his supposed friends. Yeah, those people, uh huh.
• 1:12:27
  Speaker 4: But you know where those people are a lot of
• 1:12:29
  Speaker 4: times they're out there putting fucking buckets around. He can
• 1:12:31
  Speaker 4: we raise some money from my friend that just died, Yeah,
• 1:12:35
  Speaker 4: that money's never going to them.
• 1:12:36
  Speaker 1: Listen. I I've never I've never been addicted to anything,
• 1:12:41
  Speaker 1: so I don't know what it's like.
• 1:12:42
  Speaker 4: You're an unlucky motherfucker.
• 1:12:44
  Speaker 2: I don't know what it's morning.
• 1:12:46
  Speaker 1: I do drink coffee, but I'm not addicted to it.
• 1:12:49
  Speaker 1: I can go without it easily.
• 1:12:51
  Speaker 4: But rug.
• 1:12:55
  Speaker 5: I smell an intervention. Oh you should have locked this door.
• 1:13:01
  Speaker 1: I will say. I will say that when I do
• 1:13:05
  Speaker 1: go without it. I slip up on my words every
• 1:13:09
  Speaker 1: now and then. Is there an addiction there? I don't know.
• 1:13:13
  Speaker 5: Well, and that's just a I have a really bad
• 1:13:17
  Speaker 5: addictive personality.
• 1:13:18
  Speaker 1: I'm just I'm goofing around.
• 1:13:20
  Speaker 4: My dad was an addict, my mom was an addict.
• 1:13:22
  Speaker 4: So for me, like you put cocaine in front of me,
• 1:13:26
  Speaker 4: I'm not leaving until it's gone. I don't care how
• 1:13:30
  Speaker 4: big the pilot. Well, I don't yeah that much.
• 1:13:35
  Speaker 1: Listen, I I don't. I don't condone drug use in
• 1:13:43
  Speaker 1: all these days. And that's nothing I really want to
• 1:13:48
  Speaker 1: push on the air at all. We're trying to help
• 1:13:51
  Speaker 1: this guy, and that's I.
• 1:13:56
  Speaker 5: Think he's stuck in a big rut right now and
• 1:13:58
  Speaker 5: he just doesn't know how to get himself out, and
• 1:14:00
  Speaker 5: part of them doesn't want to. And I don't know
• 1:14:02
  Speaker 5: who this girl as I see him with all the time.
• 1:14:05
  Speaker 5: I don't know if she's got some sort of hold
• 1:14:07
  Speaker 5: on them. They were argument they have something, because.
• 1:14:10
  Speaker 4: He was like, I have this person that depends on me,
• 1:14:13
  Speaker 4: and that's that's a problem. You can't. Eggar used to
• 1:14:16
  Speaker 4: use that as an excuse not to go to rehab.
• 1:14:18
  Speaker 4: Too many people depending on Oh yeah, well a lot
• 1:14:21
  Speaker 4: of people are that dependent on you. Now can't depend
• 1:14:24
  Speaker 4: on you because you're dead, So we you have to
• 1:14:27
  Speaker 4: take care of yourself first. There's no that's just a
• 1:14:30
  Speaker 4: cop out. Cop out people depending on me.
• 1:14:33
  Speaker 1: All of this is can be so much easier said
• 1:14:40
  Speaker 1: than done. I know that much. Yeah, And I've never
• 1:14:45
  Speaker 1: walked in Brandon Carbo's shoes or other shoes, and.
• 1:14:50
  Speaker 4: I've been homeless, I've done drugs, I've never panhandled.
• 1:14:54
  Speaker 1: But it's it's like, you know, at what point is
• 1:15:00
  Speaker 1: there a breaking point here for Brandon Carbo and others?
• 1:15:05
  Speaker 5: Damn, And everybody's got their own little breaking points. You've
• 1:15:08
  Speaker 5: always heard the saying everybody's got a different you know,
• 1:15:11
  Speaker 5: when they their bottom. Everybody's bottom is completely different.
• 1:15:14
  Speaker 2: I don't know.
• 1:15:15
  Speaker 5: He seems pretty healthy. He's getting money from people, which
• 1:15:18
  Speaker 5: I heard I think I heard you say earlier, just
• 1:15:20
  Speaker 5: stop giving him money. I mean, if she'd be nice
• 1:15:24
  Speaker 5: about it because he didn't force me. He didn't, you know,
• 1:15:27
  Speaker 5: I was nice. He asked for gas one time. I says, oh,
• 1:15:30
  Speaker 5: I've got some gas in the back of my car.
• 1:15:32
  Speaker 5: Where's your vehicle? He walked away. I didn't even have
• 1:15:35
  Speaker 5: to show him, you know, called his bluff. He wasn't
• 1:15:38
  Speaker 5: gonna get gas. Yeah, but he does get himself into
• 1:15:43
  Speaker 5: situations like with the very city police officer and then
• 1:15:46
  Speaker 5: there was that scuff.
• 1:15:47
  Speaker 4: But how do you get how do you how do
• 1:15:48
  Speaker 4: you give somebody like that a job that's that popular online?
• 1:15:52
  Speaker 4: You know, Timmy could never put him back on the
• 1:15:54
  Speaker 4: books because the first time you brought him onto the
• 1:15:56
  Speaker 4: fucking job site, Oh my god, what is that guy doing?
• 1:16:01
  Speaker 4: He's doing the zombie dance. He just fell into the
• 1:16:05
  Speaker 4: window over there at Nelson's and then got up and
• 1:16:07
  Speaker 4: like stumbled and little grab him kind of ran a
• 1:16:10
  Speaker 4: little Holy shit. It's can you imagine living like that?
• 1:16:15
  Speaker 4: I can't even can't. I can't, man. I was homeless
• 1:16:19
  Speaker 4: when I was like seventeen, sixteen years old. I could
• 1:16:22
  Speaker 4: never imagine living that life at my age, Like I
• 1:16:26
  Speaker 4: used to get so.
• 1:16:27
  Speaker 5: Sad, girl, I did young enough. He would never imagine that.
• 1:16:31
  Speaker 4: Yeah, when I talked, I used to talk to him.
• 1:16:33
  Speaker 4: I'm like, man, we're fifty years old. They can't. That's
• 1:16:36
  Speaker 4: it's a super sad life to.
• 1:16:37
  Speaker 5: Live, and it's got to come from within. And if
• 1:16:39
  Speaker 5: people just keep reaching out to him, whether he slaps
• 1:16:43
  Speaker 5: your hand away or walked away or whatever, as long
• 1:16:45
  Speaker 5: as people keep reaching out. And I know there's a
• 1:16:46
  Speaker 5: lot of people on the stand he's a scumbag. He's
• 1:16:48
  Speaker 5: not worth this, and you'll be locked up, you know,
• 1:16:50
  Speaker 5: wish you would die. I mean, he's a human being,
• 1:16:52
  Speaker 5: he's breathing, he's got a soul, he's gotta he's.
• 1:16:55
  Speaker 4: I bet most of them people saying that shit go
• 1:16:57
  Speaker 4: to fucking Saint Monica's every Sunday too.
• 1:17:01
  Speaker 1: Listen this this. I think we all agree here that
• 1:17:08
  Speaker 1: there's plenty of resources to help. He is in treatment court.
• 1:17:14
  Speaker 4: If he is, I disagree.
• 1:17:16
  Speaker 1: He says he is.
• 1:17:18
  Speaker 5: Right, But if he is, I mean, that is a
• 1:17:20
  Speaker 5: grueling process that they're going to give you your analysis.
• 1:17:24
  Speaker 5: Ye're going to make a check in if you don't right.
• 1:17:28
  Speaker 4: You need people to check in on Brandon, Hey, what
• 1:17:31
  Speaker 4: are you doing? Man? Sometimes and that used to be,
• 1:17:33
  Speaker 4: that used to be just a phone call in the
• 1:17:35
  Speaker 4: morning to Edgar.
• 1:17:37
  Speaker 5: I wish they had this stuff when I was younger.
• 1:17:41
  Speaker 5: Maybe I would have gotten you know, cleaning sober before thirty.
• 1:17:44
  Speaker 1: Yeah, because wow.
• 1:17:47
  Speaker 5: Yeah, there's so many opportunities out there that people are
• 1:17:49
  Speaker 5: running from them. And I think that's almost like white
• 1:17:52
  Speaker 5: noise in the background, because there's so much talk about
• 1:17:54
  Speaker 5: it and it's so prevalent out there in society that
• 1:17:57
  Speaker 5: anybody can get help so I can just do it tomorrow.
• 1:18:00
  Speaker 5: It's not like, oh my god, this is my one
• 1:18:02
  Speaker 5: and only chance I have to take it. It's I
• 1:18:04
  Speaker 5: can do it tomorrow. And a lot of people are
• 1:18:06
  Speaker 5: living like, how's he?
• 1:18:07
  Speaker 1: How's he? Who would?
• 1:18:09
  Speaker 4: I just think the resources are really hard to come by.
• 1:18:12
  Speaker 1: How's he going to get a job around around here?
• 1:18:15
  Speaker 4: Not? He needs that, he needs the changes around I.
• 1:18:17
  Speaker 1: Mean, listen, I understand he says he's he's here for
• 1:18:22
  Speaker 1: his mom, But what's he doing to help his mom?
• 1:18:26
  Speaker 4: He's putting that lady through hell.
• 1:18:28
  Speaker 5: You know, he's out there asking for money for her.
• 1:18:31
  Speaker 1: His mom to the hospital.
• 1:18:33
  Speaker 4: You know.
• 1:18:33
  Speaker 1: I don't want to speak for his mom, but I mean,
• 1:18:35
  Speaker 1: if if I was his mom, I would say, you know,
• 1:18:38
  Speaker 1: please go leave, get into a different community, start your
• 1:18:44
  Speaker 1: life over.
• 1:18:45
  Speaker 4: I'm sure he does.
• 1:18:46
  Speaker 1: I mean, I know that maybe that's that's easier said
• 1:18:48
  Speaker 1: than done, too, I get it. I don't know. I'm
• 1:18:51
  Speaker 1: just thinking off the fly here.
• 1:18:53
  Speaker 5: Well, I mean, there's, like I said, enough programs, programs.
• 1:18:56
  Speaker 5: But if he if he found his way into the
• 1:18:59
  Speaker 5: heart of the good Smartenhaven and they actually gave him,
• 1:19:03
  Speaker 5: you know, if he's struggling with drugs, you know there's
• 1:19:05
  Speaker 5: places for that. There's they've got a residence for that.
• 1:19:07
  Speaker 5: They can you know, they can help you. It's not
• 1:19:09
  Speaker 5: a treatment center, but they can. Basically, you know, it's
• 1:19:12
  Speaker 5: waiting less, I think, but that's a goal to get
• 1:19:15
  Speaker 5: in somewhere so you can have your housing. That way,
• 1:19:17
  Speaker 5: you don't have to worry about where you're gonna sleep.
• 1:19:19
  Speaker 4: At night or what you're gonna eat in the morning
• 1:19:20
  Speaker 4: because they'll feeding.
• 1:19:22
  Speaker 5: But wait, listen, after they get through that, then you
• 1:19:24
  Speaker 5: can start volunteering places. That is going to be his
• 1:19:28
  Speaker 5: first step. He's got to show people that he's changed,
• 1:19:30
  Speaker 5: that he wants to change, that he's able to change.
• 1:19:33
  Speaker 5: And then once he does, and he's going to make
• 1:19:34
  Speaker 5: contacts and he can help that down the soup kitchen
• 1:19:37
  Speaker 5: or at one of these stretches and whatnot. People change
• 1:19:40
  Speaker 5: the perception of him. He'll be off the streets, out
• 1:19:43
  Speaker 5: of sight, out of mind. And then once he does that,
• 1:19:45
  Speaker 5: then dealing if he's got the criminal stuff that he's
• 1:19:48
  Speaker 5: got to deal with, you know, taking care of that.
• 1:19:50
  Speaker 5: He may get probation, he may have to go to jail,
• 1:19:52
  Speaker 5: whatever he has to do there, work through those programs.
• 1:19:55
  Speaker 5: It's a long process. It's not like you're gonna wake
• 1:19:57
  Speaker 5: up in the morning and say, boom, I'm clean and
• 1:19:59
  Speaker 5: sober and I'm going to get me a job and
• 1:20:01
  Speaker 5: I'm going to pay my taxes and buy a new
• 1:20:03
  Speaker 5: car and get a house. It is a long, grueling,
• 1:20:06
  Speaker 5: arduous process. And I've been through it, and it's crying
• 1:20:10
  Speaker 5: and screaming and hating and loving. And not for a
• 1:20:14
  Speaker 5: week or two either, no, for years. I mean, sometimes
• 1:20:20
  Speaker 5: I've seen things happen overnight. There have been miracles, things
• 1:20:23
  Speaker 5: happen overnight for people. That's great, that's the exception on
• 1:20:25
  Speaker 5: the norm. I have seen it happen, and it's so
• 1:20:29
  Speaker 5: grateful when it does. But that is not what you know.
• 1:20:34
  Speaker 1: Rebecca has a comment here, the biggest correlation of people
• 1:20:36
  Speaker 1: who make a permanent change is previous quit attempts. That's
• 1:20:40
  Speaker 1: why you should always keep trying, even if you have
• 1:20:43
  Speaker 1: failed many times. This could be the time.
• 1:20:48
  Speaker 5: Right, Yes, yes, and that's why.
• 1:20:52
  Speaker 4: So let's just think about it this way, because I
• 1:20:55
  Speaker 4: know a lot of people, especially if they're over forty
• 1:20:57
  Speaker 4: years old, deal with this all the time. Now, those
• 1:21:00
  Speaker 4: resources are great, but what comes with those resources is appointments.
• 1:21:06
  Speaker 4: Getting to those appointments, getting to certain places you're addressing
• 1:21:13
  Speaker 4: your drug problem. Now add in the factor that you
• 1:21:16
  Speaker 4: don't have a vehicle, you don't have a way to
• 1:21:19
  Speaker 4: get anywhere, you have to beg for a ride. And
• 1:21:23
  Speaker 4: then on top of all of that, you're in the
• 1:21:25
  Speaker 4: worst fucking depression of your life. How do you get
• 1:21:28
  Speaker 4: yourself up? A lot of us deal with depressions that
• 1:21:31
  Speaker 4: we don't want to get out of bed to deal
• 1:21:32
  Speaker 4: with our normal life. Imagine your most depressed day, and
• 1:21:36
  Speaker 4: now you have to get up and go to all
• 1:21:38
  Speaker 4: of these appointments. You got to find a way to
• 1:21:40
  Speaker 4: get there. You gotta So there's so much work, and
• 1:21:43
  Speaker 4: it should not be that much work to fucking get
• 1:21:46
  Speaker 4: the help that you need.
• 1:21:47
  Speaker 2: Right.
• 1:21:48
  Speaker 1: I had somebody mentioning working Fields here. Mickey's been on
• 1:21:52
  Speaker 1: the air with me before. What an amazing organization, do
• 1:21:56
  Speaker 1: you know, Mickey, unbelievable Working Fields. It is unreal.
• 1:22:00
  Speaker 4: Can we need bigger changes with our mental health? We
• 1:22:04
  Speaker 4: need we need those changes. Mental health is such an issue.
• 1:22:09
  Speaker 4: We I mean, we grew up in Vermont. We are
• 1:22:12
  Speaker 4: fuck dude, they still do Incest Awareness Week in hard
• 1:22:16
  Speaker 4: wik that's how like I don't know it.
• 1:22:21
  Speaker 5: And one of the things, there's been so many failed
• 1:22:23
  Speaker 5: attempts at bringing programs into this area that that does
• 1:22:26
  Speaker 5: not fit this demographic, right.
• 1:22:28
  Speaker 4: Uh.
• 1:22:29
  Speaker 5: Chief Facus when he was in Montplier, he tried to
• 1:22:31
  Speaker 5: bring in Project Safe Catch, which was a program that
• 1:22:34
  Speaker 5: if you want to quit, bring in your dope, hand
• 1:22:37
  Speaker 5: it to them. They won't charge you, they'll take it
• 1:22:39
  Speaker 5: and they'll get you like fast tracked into the puper
• 1:22:41
  Speaker 5: nor fiends the box own of the methodone program.
• 1:22:44
  Speaker 4: And then everybody got a problem.
• 1:22:45
  Speaker 5: Here's the problem. People are getting busted. They found heroin
• 1:22:49
  Speaker 5: on them, and they go, oh, by the way, officer
• 1:22:51
  Speaker 5: who just put antkulls on, Hey, I want the Project
• 1:22:54
  Speaker 5: Safe Catch and they're like, that's not how it works, right,
• 1:22:57
  Speaker 5: So no one, I mean it works. If you have
• 1:23:01
  Speaker 5: a population of one hundred and fifty thousand and seventeen
• 1:23:04
  Speaker 5: people come in, you can rave I save seventeen people.
• 1:23:07
  Speaker 5: You get a population like Barry that's not one hundred
• 1:23:10
  Speaker 5: and fifty thousand, You're not gonna get those numbers. I mean,
• 1:23:14
  Speaker 5: seventeen out of one hundred and fifty is actually it's
• 1:23:17
  Speaker 5: a big number. It's like somebody I think I read
• 1:23:20
  Speaker 5: also when I was at a stop sign about if
• 1:23:25
  Speaker 5: they help one person then they feel successful. The Lighthouse program,
• 1:23:33
  Speaker 5: we see so many people come in and out of there.
• 1:23:36
  Speaker 5: We see some people come in time and time and
• 1:23:38
  Speaker 5: time and time and time again. I don't care that
• 1:23:42
  Speaker 5: kills about it, bring.
• 1:23:43
  Speaker 4: Them fucking tears. Just talking to him like a regular
• 1:23:46
  Speaker 4: human to him.
• 1:23:47
  Speaker 5: Yeah, he's, like you said, he's a human being. Sometimes
• 1:23:53
  Speaker 5: punching him is the manly reaction. And I'm not gonna lie.
• 1:23:57
  Speaker 5: Sometimes it's like just get the f away from me.
• 1:24:00
  Speaker 5: And I try not to say those things. But you
• 1:24:04
  Speaker 5: can't help what you feel. But deep down there is
• 1:24:09
  Speaker 5: somebody there that deserves to be helped.
• 1:24:12
  Speaker 1: He's you know, you referred to him Cherry not long ago.
• 1:24:17
  Speaker 1: It's a con artist. I mean, we We've got so
• 1:24:20
  Speaker 1: many comments this morning that he's yeah, it's.
• 1:24:23
  Speaker 5: Yeah, he is a con artist, that he wanted he.
• 1:24:27
  Speaker 1: Was, that he's manipulating on camera this morning.
• 1:24:33
  Speaker 4: Just because I have a narcissistic father. Trust me, nobody's
• 1:24:36
  Speaker 4: manipulating me whatsoever.
• 1:24:38
  Speaker 5: I'm surprised he didn't come in with a T shirt
• 1:24:40
  Speaker 5: that had an eight hundred number to donate money to him.
• 1:24:44
  Speaker 5: I didn't see any like tick her Down, Take Down
• 1:24:47
  Speaker 5: the bottom of the Air one podcast when I was
• 1:24:51
  Speaker 5: at the stopsy not driving looking at my phone.
• 1:24:54
  Speaker 1: Thank you boys for coming in here.
• 1:24:57
  Speaker 4: I just came in because I heard you were to
• 1:25:00
  Speaker 4: get beat up Shott and staff did. I walk in
• 1:25:03
  Speaker 4: and I was expecting to see this three hundred pound monster,
• 1:25:05
  Speaker 4: not the ninety five pound, fucking depressed little kid.
• 1:25:08
  Speaker 5: I really wanted to make it here before you got here,
• 1:25:10
  Speaker 5: because I you.
• 1:25:11
  Speaker 4: Know, I really wanted to light into this guy and
• 1:25:14
  Speaker 4: telling me was a piece of shit. That's really what
• 1:25:16
  Speaker 4: I wanted to do. I wanted to be like, hey,
• 1:25:20
  Speaker 4: how can the community protect themselves from you? Because you're aggressive?
• 1:25:23
  Speaker 4: YadA YadA YadA. And then it's a lot different when
• 1:25:26
  Speaker 4: you're sitting next to the real humans.
• 1:25:28
  Speaker 5: So in a way, this would have been perfect because
• 1:25:30
  Speaker 5: Carabo would have been in the middle and you would
• 1:25:32
  Speaker 5: have had him as the devil on one side and
• 1:25:34
  Speaker 5: me is the fluttering angel on the other.
• 1:25:37
  Speaker 4: Listen, I don't good. I just don't like people. Saw
• 1:25:40
  Speaker 4: I've never felt bad for people for SOB stories. I
• 1:25:43
  Speaker 4: have one of the biggest SOB stories in my life.
• 1:25:46
  Speaker 4: Like you want to compare SOB stories that those SOB
• 1:25:49
  Speaker 4: stories should not but.
• 1:25:50
  Speaker 5: There's a point where enough is enough and it's time
• 1:25:52
  Speaker 5: to do something about it. And that's one of the
• 1:25:55
  Speaker 5: things that's like I wanted to just take him, not
• 1:25:57
  Speaker 5: by the hand, yeah, but I wanted to say, Brandon,
• 1:25:59
  Speaker 5: we're you need to go, and then where where can
• 1:26:02
  Speaker 5: I take you after? Because I'd like to You know,
• 1:26:05
  Speaker 5: there was a kid that was on the street for
• 1:26:06
  Speaker 5: two years, living in the car with his mom for
• 1:26:09
  Speaker 5: two years. The car got taken away.
• 1:26:11
  Speaker 2: What next.
• 1:26:12
  Speaker 5: I had no idea that Capstone was able to do
• 1:26:14
  Speaker 5: what they did, but I walked him through it. He
• 1:26:17
  Speaker 5: has anxiety issues, and I walked him through the entire process.
• 1:26:20
  Speaker 4: That's great.
• 1:26:20
  Speaker 5: He got an apartment, he started doing some programs. He's
• 1:26:24
  Speaker 5: slipped up maybe fifteen thousand times.
• 1:26:28
  Speaker 2: But you're taking.
• 1:26:29
  Speaker 4: Time out of your life to help another.
• 1:26:31
  Speaker 5: Human, right, And he every time you see that's in
• 1:26:33
  Speaker 5: the smiles, and he knows there's no bullshit, and he
• 1:26:36
  Speaker 5: knows that there's at least somebody out there that's going
• 1:26:38
  Speaker 5: to help him. And you know what, he's still alive.
• 1:26:41
  Speaker 5: He's still in that house. He's still messing up. God Blossom,
• 1:26:44
  Speaker 5: love the kid to death.
• 1:26:45
  Speaker 4: Your soul is he's learning. Your soul feels so good
• 1:26:49
  Speaker 4: when you.
• 1:26:49
  Speaker 5: Help something there, help versus being.
• 1:26:51
  Speaker 4: Angry at somebody.
• 1:26:53
  Speaker 5: Well, is help out there? Just reach out to anybody.
• 1:26:57
  Speaker 5: You know.
• 1:26:57
  Speaker 1: My intentions this morning were our good intentions to to
• 1:27:03
  Speaker 1: have him come in share his story, whether it's a
• 1:27:07
  Speaker 1: heap of ship or not. I mean, the facts are
• 1:27:10
  Speaker 1: the facts. I know what the facts are.
• 1:27:12
  Speaker 5: So those brass knuckles are there for looks.
• 1:27:18
  Speaker 1: Seriously, I know.
• 1:27:19
  Speaker 5: You're you're your outreach in the community. Jd Is.
• 1:27:22
  Speaker 4: I thought that was a great.
• 1:27:23
  Speaker 5: I'm so glad he came in. I'm so glad.
• 1:27:26
  Speaker 1: I'm glad he stood me up once so aired out.
• 1:27:29
  Speaker 4: We can't say this enough aired out. He came in
• 1:27:32
  Speaker 4: and aired his story out.
• 1:27:35
  Speaker 1: Whether it's truthful.
• 1:27:38
  Speaker 4: It's in the title of the podcast.
• 1:27:41
  Speaker 5: Yeah like him, love them or hate.
• 1:27:45
  Speaker 2: Him, you can't.
• 1:27:46
  Speaker 4: You can't just have the good people on.
• 1:27:49
  Speaker 5: Let's bring him some help so that he can stop
• 1:27:52
  Speaker 5: being a pain in our ass bottom line.
• 1:27:55
  Speaker 4: Yeah, now he knows. He just saw four hundred fucking
• 1:27:58
  Speaker 4: people live watch ye, and he knows how much the
• 1:28:01
  Speaker 4: community hates him.
• 1:28:02
  Speaker 1: Hopefully.
• 1:28:03
  Speaker 4: I mean, I don't know. Let's you gotta keep you
• 1:28:05
  Speaker 4: got to keep on people like that. You can't or
• 1:28:07
  Speaker 4: just throw him away, continue shitting on him, kick him,
• 1:28:10
  Speaker 4: and eventually he'll hurt somebody or.
• 1:28:13
  Speaker 5: He'll be always got a job at Bars Little Construction.
• 1:28:16
  Speaker 4: No he does not.
• 1:28:19
  Speaker 1: Thank you guys, Thank you and and thanks thanks Brandon
• 1:28:24
  Speaker 1: for for committing. I don't know if he'll ever come back.
• 1:28:27
  Speaker 5: He said he would. I trust him. I hope he
• 1:28:29
  Speaker 5: comes back, and I hope he reaches out to people.
• 1:28:34
  Speaker 5: I was really glad to actually see him going into
• 1:28:36
  Speaker 5: the going between those two buildings for help.
• 1:28:39
  Speaker 1: Yep, thanks guys, I hope.
• 1:28:41
  Speaker 4: Thank you. A sum sum sum sum su