Latest / Unbalanced with Cerys Davage / 51. I'm a dancer... on crutches! (ft. Sophia Adzoa Moore)

Transcript

51. I'm a dancer... on crutches! (ft. Sophia Adzoa Moore) · Unbalanced with Cerys Davage

0:09
Hello everyone, welcome back to another episode of Unbalanced
0:13
with Me, Kara Savage. How are we all doing?
0:16
I'm excited again because I'm sat down with a new interviewee
0:20
today. Sophia, hi.
0:23
Hi. How are you doing?
0:25
I'm good. Thank you.
0:26
Very excited to be here. Thank you so much for agreeing
0:29
to come onto the podcast. I'm very much looking forward to
0:33
meeting you and getting to know a bit about you because it looks
0:36
like you're in theatre, am I right?
0:38
You are correct. I am a musical theatre performer
0:41
so I just graduated in July of last year.
0:46
So I've got a degree in musical theatre and I do a lot of
0:49
dancing and I do some teaching so I do dance teaching as well.
0:53
And I'm also very passionate about equality and diversity in
0:57
general, so I do bits of consultancy for that as well.
1:01
Cool. And where are you from and where
1:02
you based now? So I'm from Essex and at the
1:06
moment I'm split between living in Essex and living in London.
1:10
I'm very lucky 'cause I'm very lucky to have divorced parents.
1:14
That's not really what I mean. But one of my parents lives in
1:17
Essex and one of them lives in London and that's really helpful
1:20
because they're both close to London.
1:22
But like, it's nice to be able to spend some time in London and
1:24
then go back to like, my home base in Essex.
1:27
So yeah, so I'm sort of split between the two.
1:30
Cool. OK, so you're in theatre, which
1:34
is obviously an A field that I'm very interested in, field that I
1:37
grew up loving. So I came across to you because
1:41
I saw your dancing videos online.
1:44
Can you tell me a bit about, you know, have you always wanted to
1:46
be a dancer? Why did you decide to put it all
1:49
online? Great, of course I can.
1:52
So I've always, it's all I've ever known really is wanting to
1:56
be a dancer. I started dancing when I was
1:58
like 3 and I'd just gone gone along to these classes because
2:03
my friend was going and I wanted to hang out with my friend as 3
2:08
year olds do. And so my mum put me in the
2:10
classes and off I went and I went to ballet class and it was
2:13
great. Then my friend quit after like a
2:15
year and here I am like 22 years later still dancing.
2:20
So yeah, I just kind of fell in love with it straight away.
2:24
And then as I got older, I started doing competitions and
2:28
shows and I was just like, wow. Like the idea that someone would
2:32
pay me to do what I loved was like, well, why would I ever
2:38
want to do anything else? And I was lucky enough to be in
2:43
Billy Elliot on the West End when I was 10.
2:45
So that was an amazing experience.
2:47
And honestly, just like, sadly, I don't remember very much
2:51
because I don't have a very good long term memory, but the bits
2:54
that I do remember, amazing. And just like the concept of
2:58
being on the West End at 10, That's crazy.
3:01
Yeah. So yeah, that was always kind of
3:02
my plan. Then when I was 13, I woke up
3:06
one day in excruciating pain in one of my hips and I couldn't
3:12
walk, couldn't put any weight on my leg.
3:14
And that was kind of shocking to everyone because it kind of came
3:19
out of nowhere, just like overnight I stopped being able
3:21
to walk. And I sort of went through
3:24
doctors and physios. And at the time I kind of
3:26
thought, you know, I'm a dancer. I'd been injured before, I'd
3:29
sprained my ankle. I'd had lots of joint problems.
3:32
Maybe this is just that. Spoiler alert, it was not just
3:35
that I am still there. And so I went through months of
3:40
different doctors, people telling me there was nothing
3:42
wrong with me and I was just making it up.
3:43
Usual sort of medical gas lighting because what else would
3:47
you do to a teenage girl in pain?
3:49
Then after like 8 months of fighting and my mum like
3:53
fighting so hard, I went to see a different doctor and he was
3:57
like oh I think it's this, we're going to do surgery on your hip
4:00
and hopefully it's going to take the pain away.
4:02
And it did for a little bit and I was like great, off I go back
4:06
to dancing. That was a small blip, I'll move
4:09
on with my life. And then some months later same
4:12
thing happened again. Back in pain overnight, couldn't
4:16
do anything. Had another surgery.
4:18
It was better for a bit. And so I sort of went through
4:20
this cycle a couple of times of like going back to dancing,
4:23
being really hardcore in dancing, trying to make up for
4:25
lost time, and then being back on crutches and not being able
4:29
to walk and being in pain. And yeah, So eventually.
4:32
So this is going to be a really long answer to your one
4:34
question. No, honestly, I'm loving.
4:36
It she's she's going to keep going.
4:39
So yeah, eventually we kind of came to the conclusion that I
4:42
couldn't spend my whole life in these circles.
4:44
Like I couldn't just be having surgery and then being better
4:47
for a bit and then having surgery and then being better
4:49
for a bit. Like that wasn't sustainable.
4:51
And so eventually my doctor referred me to a different
4:54
Doctor Who was like, what else can we do?
4:57
He suggested something called a periacetabular osteotomy for
5:03
anyone listening that's heard of that or knows what that is.
5:06
I'm so sorry because it was the worst experience of my life.
5:08
I'm not going to go into details because no one wants to hear
5:10
about it, but it's basically like a pelvic realignment.
5:13
So like changing the alignment of my pelvis?
5:16
Yeah. Was not fun.
5:18
So I had that in 2020, January of 2020.
5:21
It was my first time having surgery as an adult so my mum
5:25
couldn't be with me all the time, which was horrendous.
5:28
I was in hospital for like 5 or 6 days in just so much pain.
5:35
I was on a morphine pump. I couldn't do anything.
5:38
Every time I sat up, my blood pressure just dropped.
5:41
I felt sick all the time. It was honestly so depressing.
5:44
It was really, it was really not fun and it didn't work.
5:48
So all of that was just for fun. And so at that point I'd kind of
5:53
come to terms with the fact that my body wasn't going to be
5:56
strong enough or it was, it just wasn't going to work in the
5:59
theatre industry because I was on and off crutches, mostly on
6:02
crutches. I was in pain.
6:04
Lots of drama schools, when you auditioned for them, wanted to
6:08
look at your medical records, wanted to sort of know your
6:10
medical history, had you had any big injuries?
6:12
So it's like as soon as someone finds out everything that's
6:15
happened in my life, they're going to go, no thank you, we
6:17
don't want that. And so I gave up, I quit and I
6:20
was like, well, that's not going to work for me.
6:22
And I went off to uni to do a course in theatre production.
6:25
So like stage management and lighting and sound and that sort
6:30
of thing. I was there for two weeks before
6:34
I had a little mini, mini mental breakdown and I dropped out
6:38
because I was like, I don't want to be backstage.
6:40
I want to be on stage. And I, I was like, if I can't be
6:44
on stage, I'm not sure I'll ever cope with like just being
6:47
backstage. And like, the stuff that people
6:49
do backstage is amazing, Don't get me wrong.
6:52
And maybe at some point in my life after I've been on stage,
6:55
that might be something that works for me.
6:57
But I was like, I can't bear having just missed out and then
7:01
having to be like, right on the sidelines.
7:03
I was like. Yeah, that that would have been
7:04
like torture, just watching the future you could have had.
7:07
Yeah. And so I was like, no, can't do
7:09
it. So I dropped out, and then COVID
7:11
happened. And now obviously COVID was a
7:14
horrible thing, but it came at a really great time for me because
7:16
I got to spend months just being like, OK, what what am I going
7:20
to do with my life? And like reassessing and just
7:22
kind of being like, what next? So around that time, I'm still
7:27
working with the doctors trying to work out what was wrong with
7:29
me. And eventually my doctor was
7:31
kind of like, well, the pains in your hip, if we take out your
7:35
hip, surely we'll be taking out the pain.
7:37
So like, we'll give you a hip replacement and that should fix
7:41
it. You know, that's quite drastic,
7:42
but like it should work because, you know, we're taking out the
7:46
problem, but because of COVID, it's an 18 month wait.
7:50
So I was like, that's a really long time.
7:52
And at this point I was also making the decision to just give
7:57
performing one last shot. I was like, I'll send off myself
8:00
tapes because it was not in personal auditions because it
8:03
was COVID. I was like, I'll send off my
8:04
videos to these colleges if they don't want me, then like that's
8:07
my final straw. Like that's it.
8:09
I can't do it. But if someone does want me and
8:11
they'll take me on crutches, then I'll go and I'll see what
8:14
happens. And so that was all sort of
8:17
going on at the same time. And I made the bold, bold
8:22
decision to try and finance my hip replacement privately
8:27
because privately they could do it in two weeks time.
8:29
And on the NHS it would have been 18 months, which would have
8:32
fallen had I got into a college, would have fallen right in the
8:35
middle of my training. And I was like, I can't be
8:38
leaving my training to go and have a hip replacement.
8:40
Like that's just not going to work.
8:42
And so I did, I used my savings, my family helped me.
8:45
I did a bit of fundraising. I did a did I do, I did
8:48
something sponsored. I can't remember what it was,
8:50
but I did something and I financed I think 5000 lbs of it
8:57
through like fundraising and through family.
8:59
And then I put a whole bunch of money in and, you know, great.
9:02
And I had that. That was completely during
9:05
Covad. So that one, no one was allowed
9:08
in the hospital at any point. It was just me on my own the
9:11
whole time. And it did take the pain away
9:13
for a little bit. And I did get a bit of relief,
9:15
but not for long. And so then the pain.
9:18
Yeah, I know. It's like a fun cycle.
9:20
It's like whoa, Oh no, whoa, Oh no.
9:22
This how I always explain my story.
9:24
Like there's the injury and disability story and there's the
9:27
performing story and obviously it is all one story 'cause it's
9:29
all my life. But like sometimes the timing,
9:32
I'm telling the story at the wrong time.
9:35
You did a Really. Good job of like weaving them
9:36
both together. So yeah, carry on.
9:39
I'm trying really hard. Yeah.
9:41
So while I was auditioning before my hip replacement,
9:44
that's where I this where I've gone in the wrong order.
9:47
I sent off my tapes to a place called PPA in Guildford and they
9:52
accepted me and I was like, OK, you know, I'll take it.
9:56
My tape was a video of me dancing on crutches.
10:00
And I was like, I'll go and I'll see what happens.
10:03
And then the whole hip replacement thing happened and I
10:05
was like, oh, maybe I'll be fixed and it'll all be for
10:07
nothing. And they'll be like, oh, what a
10:09
weird video she sent. But it, it didn't work long
10:11
term. And so I did spend most of my
10:14
training on crutches, which was hard, hard.
10:18
And that sort of brings us to today.
10:22
I finished my training, I did all my third year like shows and
10:25
agent auditions and stuff, all on crutches.
10:28
And now I'm sort of beginning to navigate the world of performing
10:32
as a disabled artist in the sense that I've had the hip
10:38
replacement and it didn't work. And so currently we're in a
10:43
don't know what's wrong with you.
10:44
Definitely chronic pain. Can we fix it?
10:46
Who knows? So yeah.
10:50
Wow, well thank you so much for sharing that.
10:52
I think you did a great job aligning your, you know,
10:56
disability story and your theatre story in one, so thanks
11:00
to you for that. That's insane that they still
11:04
don't know what the problem is. It sounds like it's just been
11:06
trial and error for you, like your whole life basically.
11:09
Yeah, it really has. And to start with it was like,
11:13
oh, OK, like it's just an injury, that's fine.
11:16
And then more and more it's become like a a long term thing.
11:19
And alongside that hip problem, I also have only recently, but
11:25
have experienced symptoms for years and been diagnosed with
11:28
hypermobile EDS, Ellis Downer syndrome.
11:31
And that it's just like a fun addition.
11:34
So like all my joints are kind of unstable and like I get
11:37
migraines and fatigue and digestive issues and all the
11:40
things that come with that as well.
11:42
And then like the left hip is like the big problem in terms of
11:46
my joints. So like it's like fun and
11:50
layered. I've got a little bit of
11:52
everything. So many things.
11:54
Yeah, it's so fun. So.
11:56
So the hip isn't to do with the hypermobile EDS?
11:59
Well, we don't think so, but who really knows, Probably the
12:07
hypermobility has something to do with it and it definitely has
12:10
something to do with the fact that I've had it.
12:12
I can have had a hip replacement and still kick my leg around
12:16
like I do, which is, you know, the hypermobility is very
12:19
helpful there, but we don't think that it's completely
12:24
related. But also who really knows?
12:27
And I was only diagnosed with EDS like a couple of months ago.
12:31
And so there's not been very long of us, like, being like,
12:34
are they linked? Because currently I see my hip
12:37
surgeon like once every six months or once a year.
12:39
And we just kind of go in. I go in the room and he goes,
12:41
ah, still on crutches. And I go, yeah, he goes, ah,
12:44
still in pain. And I go, yeah.
12:46
And he goes, OK, see you in six months.
12:49
And it's great. I make a nice trip into London
12:52
and this great fun. Just for that, yeah.
12:55
Absolutely. I guess it's so frustrating, but
12:58
I love that you've not given up on your dream, which is
13:02
obviously theatre and performing and dancing, and you managed to
13:05
find a way around it. And crutches obviously help you
13:08
with your hips, right? Yeah.
13:10
Was that like a recommendation or was that just something that
13:12
you found along the way of like the trial and error process?
13:16
It's always been the only option.
13:17
So the first time that it happened when I was like 13, I
13:20
woke up because I couldn't put any weight on that leg.
13:23
I like crawled to the car and then my mum literally like
13:27
carried me into the physio and then the physio gave me crutches
13:29
because he was like, you can't like crawl around for the rest
13:32
of your life. And so that was really the only
13:35
way I could get around at that point.
13:36
And so every time that I've ended up back in pain, it's
13:40
always been my go to. I mean, occasionally I'll use a
13:43
wheelchair if I'm having a really bad day or if I'm feeling
13:46
like it would be easier just to be pushed around.
13:50
But mostly I use the crutches. And so it was a long time before
13:54
I even considered using the crutches to dance as well.
13:58
It was mainly just like a, a walking thing.
14:00
And then when I was like, but I can't give up dancing because I
14:04
just love it so much. I was like, well, if the
14:07
crutches help me walk, why wouldn't they helped me dance?
14:10
And I'd always, like, been able to do, like, silly tricks and
14:13
leaps because I had so much hypermobility.
14:16
Even when I was in pain, I've always been able to do those big
14:18
kicks and stuff. And I was like, well, if I can
14:20
do that, like, why can't I do anything else?
14:24
So yeah. And here you are.
14:26
Yeah. Smashing it, dancing on
14:27
crutches, which is something that I haven't really seen that
14:30
much online and I don't know why because, you know, I'm sure that
14:34
there are so many disabled dancers out there, you know, on
14:37
crutches and wheelchairs. I've seen some wheelchair
14:39
dancing actually. That looks insane.
14:42
And it gives me a bit of hope because I used to love dancing
14:44
when I was younger. I can't really dance anymore
14:46
because I can't really like skip or jump or run.
14:49
And so the hope that maybe if I am in a wheelchair one day, I
14:54
could still, you know, express my love for dancing just in a
14:59
different way. It's just so inspiring.
15:02
And I'm sure a lot of other disabled people are looking at
15:06
your content right now and thinking, OK, well, maybe there
15:09
is hope for me. Maybe I can't, you know, maybe I
15:12
don't have to give up on my dream completely.
15:14
Maybe I can just do it in a in a different way.
15:16
So it's it's so cool what you're doing online.
15:19
Yeah. What's that been like?
15:21
It's it's been so, so nice. I've got lots of lovely comments
15:27
of people being like, wow, like I used to love dancing and I've
15:30
never even considered that I'd still be able to do it.
15:32
Or, you know, I've always thought that I couldn't do that,
15:36
but now I'm going to give it a go.
15:37
Or even just in the sense they're like, why you're so
15:40
like, you're out there just doing what you want to do.
15:43
That makes me think that actually I can walk down the
15:45
street on crutches and not feel embarrassed of my mobility.
15:48
It's like they're there to help. And so that has been so lovely.
15:53
I mean, there's two sides to it. I've had plenty of not so great
15:57
comments and the oh, she's moving so fast that like she
16:01
must be faking it. And I'm like, well, no, but you
16:04
know, yes, I can move fast or like, oh, this doesn't look
16:09
right. Like this doesn't work because,
16:12
you know, it looks weird. I'm like, well.
16:14
Tell me what a disabled dancer is supposed to look like.
16:16
Yeah, I was like, just because you haven't seen it before
16:19
doesn't mean it's weird. Like it's not my fault that you
16:21
have. You don't see disabled people in
16:23
the media very often. We're trying to work on it.
16:25
We're getting there. But like, if you constantly just
16:27
see a disabled person go that looks weird, then we're never
16:30
going to get anywhere. I get lots of people like
16:32
fighting each other in the comments on my behalf, which is
16:34
like really entertaining to watch.
16:36
And also I'm very grateful that people are standing up for me.
16:39
But one comment that I love to see and people say quite often
16:42
is like, people seem to be shocked that my my mobility aids
16:46
are aiding my mobility. Like, of course, they're making
16:50
me be able to move better. That's what they're there for.
16:53
And so why are you so shocked that someone who's using
16:55
something to aid their mobility is moving well?
16:59
And yeah, you don't always see people on crutches or on board
17:02
chairs dancing. But like, they do it, it's just
17:05
not as highly shown in the media because no one's the industry
17:10
isn't ready for that yet. But I'm hoping real soon they're
17:14
going to start wanting to see disabled people in the media.
17:17
And like, it is going in the right direction already.
17:19
Some some shows and some forms of media are really opening
17:24
things up and creating exciting work and putting disabled people
17:28
at the forefront, but also not always so.
17:32
Yeah, yeah. But you're, you know, one of the
17:36
people that's taking that big step and pushing it into
17:40
people's feeds on socials and bringing it out into mainstream
17:43
media. And people might be confused
17:46
when they see it, but you're at least you're showing it to them.
17:49
You're showing people that dancing on crutches, something
17:52
to aid you, like you said, is an option.
17:55
And it's not. You know, I feel like people
17:58
think if you're, if you're disabled, you can't do anything.
18:01
Like you've got a mobility aid, but you can, you know, that just
18:04
helps you get by like just barely walk.
18:07
But actually, no, you can still, you know, there's so many
18:09
different levels of disabilities.
18:11
You can still do a lot of things.
18:13
You can still do high kicks, right?
18:16
Yeah, exactly. You can splits right?
18:19
Yeah, I can only on one leg, but, you know, but I think for
18:24
me, lots of people expect disabled people to do the bare
18:31
minimum to be able to just about get from their bed to the toilet
18:35
and be like, oh, that's, you know, that's it.
18:38
But it's actually not. There's, there's so much more to
18:40
it. And yes, there are some disabled
18:41
people who that is the limit of what they can do, and that is
18:44
totally OK. But there are so many different
18:48
disabled identities. And I think people sometimes
18:51
forget that. Like, I sometimes get the
18:53
comment of like, oh, my uncle's disabled and he couldn't do
18:56
this. I'm like, well, yeah, but your
18:59
uncle's probably not a professional dancer.
19:01
So like, maybe that's why he couldn't do this.
19:03
It's got nothing to do with his disability.
19:05
It's got to do with the fact that I've trained in dance and
19:07
he hasn't. Like, it's disabled isn't the
19:09
only part of my identity. There's also I'm a black woman
19:13
and I'm queer and I'm a dancer and I have I have passions and I
19:18
have love. That is not like disability is
19:21
the only thing. And therefore I can only do
19:23
things that are in the disability box that society has
19:26
given us, which is actually a bunch of rubbish because No2
19:30
disabled people are the same. Exactly, and a lot of non
19:34
disabled people couldn't do what you do, you know.
19:37
Yeah, I get that comment too. Like I'm not disabled and I even
19:40
I couldn't do this. And I'm like, well, that's also
19:42
because you're not a professional dancer.
19:43
Like I have been dancing all my life.
19:46
And so, yeah, I'm better than you who's never taken a dance
19:49
class before. Yeah.
19:51
I've got a video on TikTok that has got like a bunch of really
19:55
weird comments. And like one of the go to
19:58
comments there is like, Oh yeah, you keep doing this as a hobby.
20:00
But like, you have to understand that professional dancers, like
20:03
there's just different needs for them.
20:06
Like, but you dance as a hobby. Like that's great.
20:09
And then I have to be like. Oh hi thanks for your comment
20:12
but also I am already a professional dancer like people
20:15
are paying me to dance already. But thank you for your input.
20:19
I will keep dancing as my job, you know I.
20:22
Feel concerned now? I was like, yeah, OK, fine.
20:26
The difference between me now and me like two or three weeks
20:29
ago when that video was getting big and like, it's got a million
20:32
views now and most of them aren't for positive reasons.
20:36
And at that time it was like really getting me down.
20:38
And it was like being like, oh, maybe I can't do this.
20:41
And now I'm just like, these are losers commenting on my video,
20:44
upping the engagement without even realising.
20:46
Tick tock doesn't know you hate it.
20:48
They're just pushing it out to more people.
20:50
Keep going. Keep them going, yeah?
20:52
And so I think I've kind of got that self assurance that I'm
20:55
like, I know what I'm doing and I like what I'm doing and I'm
20:57
proud of what I'm doing. And if you think it's weird or
21:00
you think it doesn't look right, or you think I'm not good enough
21:02
to be a professional dancer or disabled people can't be
21:05
professional dancers for you because I'm having a great time
21:08
and you know. I feel like negative comments
21:10
can really get to you if you if you let them be personal.
21:13
But actually they don't know anything about your life.
21:15
They don't know that, yes, you had so many opportunities
21:18
because of dance. And yeah, they they just don't
21:21
know what you can actually do. And people like to think that
21:24
they're better and bigger than disabled people, but actually,
21:29
no, Yeah, I think a lot of things.
21:31
I always go for the like, that is so great that that's your
21:35
opinion, but also you're not casting the tour and you're not
21:38
casting the musical and you're not casting the film.
21:41
So actually it doesn't matter what you think and whether you
21:43
think I could be in it at all. The people that that opinions
21:47
actually mattered to me are the choreographers and the directors
21:51
and the people casting these productions.
21:54
I don't care what Mary on TikTok with 0 followers says that
21:58
that's not going to change my life.
22:00
And why do they feel the need to actually comment that on the
22:02
stranger's video anyway? Disabled or not, you know
22:05
you're. Like.
22:05
Sorry, I think you should find another job.
22:08
Yeah. Like what possessed you to like,
22:11
think something that you know is not helpful or nice or like
22:15
needed in any way? If you say something in person
22:18
and you're like, oh, and then you can be like, oh, I shouldn't
22:20
have said that, but like to type a comment, you've got to think
22:23
it and type it and press send. That's a lot of time for you to
22:25
be like, actually I don't need to do this.
22:28
And maybe if they saw you in person, they they probably
22:30
wouldn't have said that because they probably wouldn't have the
22:31
guts to say that to to your. Friends, so true, so true.
22:35
And they also they're like people be in the comments being
22:38
like saying mean things and then like I'll come back at them with
22:41
like a valid argument or like they love to say like disabled
22:44
people aren't as efficient. And I'm like, what does that
22:46
even mean? But then when I come back and
22:48
I'm like, actually, I can do this and I can move at speed and
22:50
I can get changed super fast. Then they start replying and I'm
22:53
like, oh, where did you go? Come back?
22:56
I wanted to talk about that, but they just when they realise that
23:01
actually maybe I have a point, they're like, oh, bye.
23:04
You're educating people one at a time, so good for you.
23:07
I want to talk about the theatre industry and any misconceptions
23:12
that maybe you've come across that you might want to address.
23:15
Any stereotypes that you think need to be smashed, not only as
23:19
a disabled person but like you said, as a queer black person as
23:22
well. What are the misconceptions you
23:24
think people should be more aware of and educate themselves
23:27
on? In terms of disability, I think
23:30
there isn't a huge misconception in because of the fact that
23:34
there's so few disabled people in the theatre industry that
23:37
there's not really room to have lots of like misconceptions.
23:41
The main misconception is that disabled people can't be in
23:44
theatre because you don't see them.
23:46
And don't get me wrong, last year or so it has upped.
23:51
There was little big Things in London that was great, featured
23:54
loads of disabled people and was about disabled people.
23:57
And there's a disabled girl in Hades Town right now.
24:00
Like it is starting to move in the right direction, but I think
24:04
it's a tricky 1. I also think it's really
24:06
important to have disabled people not only in disabled
24:11
roles. And so like, I loved the Little
24:14
Big things. It was amazing.
24:15
It was a story of Henry Fraser who ended up in a wheelchair and
24:20
for his story and how he kind of created a brand new life and did
24:23
something that he loved after his accident, and that is
24:27
amazing. And so the person playing Henry
24:29
was in a wheelchair and there was another character in a
24:31
wheelchair that was played by Amy Trigg, who is a wheelchair
24:34
user. And that's great, but I would
24:36
also love to see more of characters whose disability
24:41
isn't part of the plot and them just being disabled.
24:44
And particularly for me, that's something that I want to do.
24:48
Like I want to go and be in ensembles of shows and just be a
24:52
disabled person in the crowd. Because like in life, you walk
24:56
down the street and there are disabled people.
24:58
So something like Jamie, everybody's talking about Jamie
25:01
is based on a Year 11 high school class.
25:04
Now tell me a school class that hasn't at some point had someone
25:07
on crutches. You know, disabled people go to
25:09
school, they could be there something like Mamma Mia, it's
25:13
just a bunch of people on an island.
25:15
Disabled people also go on holiday.
25:17
You know, like, contrary to people's beliefs, we do go
25:20
outside. And so, yeah, I think that sort
25:25
of thing, like not only, I mean, yes, tell disabled stories
25:30
really important, but also would love to see more of just like
25:35
disabled people existing because there are so many disabled
25:37
people in the world, why they're not existing in the media too.
25:42
And I think the same goes for Black and queer people.
25:45
I think that's moving slightly faster than disability.
25:50
I think we're getting more of Black people in roles that are
25:54
typically white, but their whiteness has got nothing to do
25:56
with the role. I'm trying to think of one off
25:59
the top of my head. Well, Sinta Revo in Wicked and
26:03
also the new Alpha Brain. Wicked on Broadway is black.
26:07
There's no reason. In fact, there's a great reason
26:09
as to why Alpha but should be black.
26:10
But you know, anyway, she's great, but I think that's really
26:15
important. There was a black Glenda in
26:17
Wicked over here as well. Like, those things are happening
26:20
a bit faster than disabled people kind of being at the
26:26
forefront. Like, I don't see any time soon
26:29
that, like, you're going to see Hamilton and Hamilton in a
26:31
wheelchair. You know, there are some parts
26:33
that you'd be like, oh, you know, probably not.
26:36
And in the same way, there are some parts that the whiteness is
26:40
integral to the role that you wouldn't give it to a black
26:42
person because it wouldn't make sense.
26:44
And there will be some roles like that, but not as many as
26:48
one thinks. Also make Nasser and Wicked a
26:51
wheelchair user. We did it in the film we should
26:54
start doing. That What's the excuse?
26:56
Like. Is the excuse right?
26:58
And everyone, everyone's going to comment.
27:00
Yeah, but she walks in at 2 and she gets up and she walks
27:03
around. Oh, did you ever know that there
27:05
was people in the wheelchair who can take a couple of steps?
27:08
Whoa. It's so crazy.
27:10
They could do it. Hire me right now.
27:12
Yeah, I think you both. And this is the thing.
27:15
Like, you're not going to have someone who absolutely can't
27:18
move at all. There's differences, but there
27:20
are people who could easily play NASA.
27:22
Well, thank you for sharing that insight into casting and life in
27:26
theatre and how far we've come, but also how much work we still
27:31
have to do and how much education and casting the right
27:35
people there is still to be done.
27:37
And it just gives me a glimmer of hope because I studied
27:40
theatre and that's when when I came across my first few hurdles
27:45
as a disabled person because my disability is degenerative.
27:48
So I'll just continue, continue to get worse as I get older.
27:52
And there were some things that the directors would suggest and
27:56
I couldn't do it. And they'd be like, OK, well,
27:58
what can you do? And I'm like, I have to adapt
28:01
myself to so many of these situations rather than adapting
28:05
the situations, rather than adapting the set or the props or
28:08
whatever. To me, I had to constantly just
28:12
be like, no, I can't do this. I'm going to have to figure out
28:14
my own way of doing it, which put a lot of pressure on myself
28:17
and made me think, OK, well, this just isn't a sustainable
28:21
career for me. It's not a sustainable future
28:23
because I'm going to constantly have to adapt how I am to
28:27
different scenarios that other normal quotes people I can do.
28:32
So that just really put me off and I've I've gone down a
28:35
completely different career path.
28:36
Maybe that's for the best. Maybe I wouldn't have started
28:38
this podcast otherwise, but it does give me some hope that
28:44
there are disabled actors out there that don't feel like they
28:48
need to change themselves to fit into a certain role, you know,
28:53
on into a certain category. Do you feel?
28:55
Yeah, I think I had such a great experience in one of our
28:58
projects at uni that really was kind of the opposite of your
29:03
experience there in the fact that we did something called
29:06
Swing Project. So basically you learn a show
29:09
and you have to learn multiple tracks and then you perform the
29:13
show and then the names are picked out of a hat and you have
29:15
to perform the show again in a different role.
29:17
Hilarious. Really, really difficult if you
29:21
don't have that sort of brain. Luckily, I do have that sort of
29:23
brain Lack and remember lots of different things.
29:26
But we did Cats, which is an almost entirely dance musical
29:30
about cats with no real plot. Very strange show.
29:34
If you love it, you love it. If you don't, you probably hate
29:36
it. But yeah, so I had to learn the
29:38
tracks of 20 different cats and we all did.
29:42
And that's, you know, what we had to do.
29:45
I was like, this is this is going to be horrible.
29:46
Like I'm, I'm going to have to adapt to the choreography, but
29:50
like adapt it for every different cat.
29:52
And it's going to be different. I'm going to have so much more
29:53
work than everyone else, Which in a way is true.
29:57
But also there was lots of times where it was like, OK, this cat
30:01
picks up this thing, but I can't pick it up.
30:03
So then if I'm that cat, someone else has got to pick it up.
30:07
So it almost became everyone else's problem that I couldn't
30:11
do it and they had to deal with the consequences rather than it
30:14
always being me. And so like there'd be times
30:16
where like I'd put my crutches down and someone would have to
30:19
move them to be in the right place.
30:20
And it like that wasn't ever my problem.
30:23
I just put them down and hoped that someone remembered to pick
30:25
them up. And so it was kind of nice.
30:28
I mean, I was the problem, but I didn't have to solve the
30:30
problem. Like I was just kind of being me
30:32
and having fun. And then it was up to everyone
30:35
else to like, sort everything out.
30:37
And they were great. And we sort of had like plans
30:40
for my crutches. So like everyone knew where the
30:42
crutches were meant to be and who had to move them.
30:44
And so that was that was really good.
30:47
But I think that kind of experience for me was like, oh,
30:51
OK. Like it's not always going to be
30:53
me who has to deal with it. Like there can be other people
30:56
who like, help you work around it, which was nice.
31:01
And I really enjoyed that project.
31:02
And it was the project that I did best in.
31:04
What's the word grades wise? Oh.
31:07
Great. OK, Yeah, yeah, yeah.
31:08
Wow. The out of the whole, my whole
31:12
time at uni, that was the thing that I got the highest scoring
31:15
and I had the time of my life, so you know.
31:17
So cool. I mean, that just shows teamwork
31:21
makes the dream work, honestly, and it doesn't make you feel
31:23
like a problem then like everyone's willing to take on
31:26
your baggage. And yeah.
31:29
And yeah, that's so great. I'm so happy for you that you
31:33
had that positive experience and that's kind of helped lead the
31:37
way for you and know that there's a, a space for you in
31:40
theatre, right? Yeah, definitely.
31:42
And I think I took that going into I made my West End debut,
31:46
well, my adult West End debut slash my disabled West End debut
31:50
in October last year. And I kind of took that into
31:55
that like knowing like if I put something down, it wasn't always
31:59
going to be my problem. So like there was like a bed on
32:02
the stage and I would be sat on it a lot.
32:05
And so I'd put my crutches somewhere and it wasn't always
32:07
my responsibility to make sure they're in the right place.
32:09
There were other people there to help out.
32:11
And they actually even put a little hook on the set for me,
32:14
for me to be able to hang up my crutch if I didn't need it.
32:16
I could like put it on the PEC, which was really cool of them.
32:20
And so like also the team that I was working with in that show,
32:24
the ensemble were incredible. And I love them so much.
32:27
They'd almost think of it before I even would.
32:28
Like I'd turn around or the crutches would be there before
32:31
I'd even like been like, oh, I need to get them now.
32:34
And so that was that was a really good experience as well.
32:37
Like that filled me with confidence that the industry is
32:41
moving in enough in the right direction to kind of work with
32:46
me. Yeah.
32:47
And accommodate you, yeah. Yeah, and obviously other
32:49
disabled people, but I'm talking to you.
32:53
And let's also give Amelia a shout out from Cool Crutches,
32:55
because you use Cool crutches, right?
32:57
Yeah, my queen. I actually love her so much.
33:00
She is. She's.
33:00
Been on this podcast? Has she?
33:03
Yeah. I'm going to have to go listen
33:05
now. She's just the best.
33:07
Like my favourite thing in the world is cool crutches.
33:10
And Amelia, she is just, she's so cool and she has changed the
33:15
the she's just changed the game. Like, first of all, they're
33:19
cool, you know, so the name, they're like, they're fun
33:22
patterns and they're interesting and they can match your outfit
33:25
and they're like, they don't have to be the ugly silver ones
33:27
the NHS give you. But also they're quiet and
33:29
they're supportive and they come with different ends to like,
33:33
work on different terrains and like some work really well for
33:36
dancing and like some work well for, you know, walking up hills
33:39
and stuff. And I used to find that the
33:41
cuffs that go round the top around the arm, I used to find
33:45
that sometimes when I was dancing, they'd open and close
33:47
and they'd pinch my skin. And yeah, no, not good, not
33:51
good. And I told her about it and she
33:53
was like, oh, I think let's try this, Let's try this.
33:55
And now they make cuff covers that go round them so you don't
33:58
have to experience that pinching at all.
34:00
And so like, she has just, like, worked to make it work for me.
34:06
And I was really lucky that in September last year and I
34:10
performed at the Paralympic homecoming ceremony.
34:15
I performed with Katy Gazer. Yeah, it was so random, but it
34:18
was really fun. And she was there.
34:21
She'd been given a ticket, so she got to see me dance in
34:24
person. And then I got to meet her
34:25
afterwards. And it was just, it was so cold
34:28
and I was so tired. And I was like, oh, I just want
34:31
to go home. And then I saw her and I was
34:32
like, no, I don't want to go home.
34:33
I'm so glad to see you. It's so great.
34:36
That was really lovely. And she's just, she really has
34:39
changed the game and she's so supportive and yeah, just love
34:44
her, my queen. What a fulfilling role she has,
34:47
right? Like, yeah, seeing, seeing
34:49
people's dreams come true because of these crutches.
34:51
Yeah. And like, meanwhile, her own
34:54
dreams coming true at the same time.
34:56
And I'm like, wow. Like even right now she's in
34:58
Dubai and I'm like, say, Queen, you're having so much fun.
35:01
And like, you're like, you can experience all those things
35:04
because of the products that you made.
35:06
And I just think that's amazing. She's she's killing it,
35:09
honestly. Yeah.
35:11
So we love Emilia. We really do.
35:13
We really do. Tell me what you're up to now
35:16
and what your future hopes and dreams are.
35:20
That is a really good question. Right now I am just experiencing
35:26
life. I'm focusing quite a lot on
35:29
content creation, which I'm really enjoying.
35:32
A little bit stressful because it's not something that I ever
35:34
really taken seriously before, but I'm lucky enough to have
35:38
grown both of my platforms quite a lot in the last couple of
35:42
months. On TikTok I think I've got like
35:44
21,000 now and on Instagram I've got over 10,000.
35:47
Bearing in mind like 2 weeks ago I had 2000 followers on
35:49
Instagram. It's like a big difference.
35:52
By the time this episode comes out, it'll be a lot more, I'm
35:54
sure. Well, you know, we'll, we'll
35:57
see. And so I'm doing a lot of that,
36:00
which is, which is really fun. I'm doing my regular teaching
36:02
and equality and diversity work and just kind of getting myself
36:06
out there, having people see me dance both on social media and
36:09
regularly going to classes in London.
36:11
And just hoping that at some point someone, I mean, I'm lucky
36:15
that I have done a show already, but like, hope, hoping at some
36:18
point I'll go to an audition or a class and someone will see me
36:20
and be like, oh, wow, that could really work.
36:25
And I think meanwhile, just sort of doing the bits of educating,
36:28
replying to the comments and, you know, setting people
36:32
straight. And yeah, I think if someone
36:35
told me I should design merch and when someone tells me to do
36:38
something, I get carried away. So when you see me selling merch
36:43
business and just buy, buy the merch.
36:46
And so, yeah, just just bits and pieces right now just kind of
36:51
going, helping elevate disabled voices and showing disabled joy.
36:56
And I think that's something that is really missing.
36:58
Lots of people see the negative experiences or like articles
37:02
about things disabled people don't get and don't get to see
37:05
their joy very often. And so I'm really trying to push
37:08
that. And yeah, obviously I'll talk
37:10
about, you know, the hardships and, you know, the things that
37:12
go wrong and the people who don't say very nice things.
37:14
But I also want to show the like, just videos of me having
37:18
fun. Let me dancing, let me walking
37:21
my dog like that, that stuff. I want to keep pushing and yeah,
37:26
just keep showing people that there's no limits.
37:28
You can do whatever you want to do.
37:29
It might not be in the way that you first thought it might
37:31
happen, but like, there's no excuse to not give it a go.
37:34
Like try see what happens, make something of it.
37:37
So that's kind of what I'm doing right now.
37:39
It sounds like that's maybe some advice maybe you would give to
37:44
younger people who maybe don't know how to go about this.
37:49
And maybe if they're struggling with new diagnosis or the
37:53
disability and it's still new to them and they don't know whether
37:56
they can go into industry. Is that the kind of advice you
37:59
you'd give them? Like give it a go?
38:01
Yeah, I think so much there's obviously when you get a
38:04
diagnosis or you're experiencing a chronic illness or a
38:07
disability, there will always be an element of like what, what
38:12
could have been like what, what would my life be like if, And I
38:15
totally get that. And I experienced that too.
38:17
And you're allowed to have grief for that version of your life
38:20
that didn't happen. But I also think give it a go,
38:25
like look at that version of your life that you're grieving
38:28
and be like, what aspects of that can I try?
38:32
Can I create, Can I adapt to fit to what I've got now?
38:35
Because 13 year old me would never have thought of dancing on
38:40
crutches. She was just like, this is the
38:42
worst thing that's ever happened to me.
38:43
I don't know what I'm going to do.
38:46
And that isn't the case now. And it yeah, it took me 12 years
38:52
to get to where I am. And so these things take time.
38:54
I don't like expect someone to get a diagnosis and the next day
38:56
be like, I'm actually on the Olympic wheelchair rugby team.
39:00
Like that's, that's not how it works.
39:03
But I think look at what you want to do and, and really be
39:07
like, what is stopping me from doing that?
39:10
Is it something physically? Because obviously if it's
39:12
dangerous, don't do it. Like if it's going to hurt you
39:15
mentally or physically, don't do it.
39:17
But if it's like a societal barrier or like systemic
39:22
discrimination, push, see what happens, you know, be annoying.
39:27
I can't. I was listening to a podcast
39:30
earlier and they were like, it was like a true kind of podcast.
39:33
It's not relevant at all. But they were saying like be a
39:37
nuisance. Like you have to, you have to be
39:40
loud and proud and annoying to make change.
39:42
So like if you want to do something and it's like
39:46
systemically it's not letting something's, not letting it
39:49
happen, keep talking. Like it is largely systemic in
39:54
the theatre industry that like there's no space for disabled
39:57
people because the theatre's not accessible.
40:00
So then they just go, no, can't do it, these things, but you
40:03
just got to keep making the noise.
40:05
Otherwise, if you just accept it and go right, OK, fine, I'll
40:07
have to do something else then nothing's ever going to change
40:10
and so. Part of what I'm doing is for
40:12
me, but part of what I'm doing is also for like the generations
40:16
of disabled people that are going to keep coming because
40:18
disabled people do exist. There are disabled children
40:20
being born right now. There are people right now who
40:22
aren't disabled, who are going to be disabled in the future.
40:25
And I want for them what I wish I had right now.
40:31
And so, like, fighting for the change is also for them as it is
40:35
for me. And so like you don't, you don't
40:38
always necessarily achieve the end goal, but like if you can
40:42
fight towards doing that end goal, not only will you get to
40:45
do more, but the people who come after you will get to do more.
40:49
That was a really long spiel. I hope it makes sense.
40:52
That was perfect. Honestly, that was so good.
40:57
It's like you have like a script in your brain and you just said
41:00
everything perfectly well. Done.
41:02
Stop it. This little brain, she's working
41:04
hard. Wow.
41:07
Well, Sophia, thank you so much for joining me today and sharing
41:11
an insight into your life. I've really, really enjoyed
41:14
getting to know you and I feel so inspired now to just like, do
41:18
anything, you know? Thank you so much for having me.
41:21
It's been it's been so fun. I love chatting with new people
41:25
and talking about disability and also connecting with other
41:28
disabled people. I think a lot of my audience,
41:31
which is great, is non disabled people looking at a disabled
41:35
person being like, oh wow, that's great.
41:36
But it's always so nice to like communicate with disabled people
41:40
and like work with disabled people.
41:43
Shameless plug, right now I actually teach a class on a
41:46
Sunday evening on Zoom that is a musical theatre dance class,
41:51
which is almost entirely got disabled participants, which is
41:55
mainly sort of there for disabled people, non disabled
41:59
people. You're welcome to join too.
42:01
Mostly we do seated dancers and that's run through the Kate
42:05
Stanforth Academy of Arts. You can find them on Instagram.
42:08
Kate at Kate Stanforth Dance and they do other classes as well.
42:12
It's not just me, but they're classes all taught by disabled
42:16
instructors, instructors for disabled people.
42:19
And I think I love that environment on a Sunday.
42:21
I have a great laugh and any disabled people who want to take
42:25
a dance class get booking. I I'll be there, honestly, like
42:31
why have I not heard of these kind of things before?
42:33
Yeah. Thank you so much for sharing
42:35
that. Where can we find you on socials
42:37
as well? That's a great question.
42:40
On Instagram, I'm at Sophia dot adra dot Moore.
42:44
Adra is spelled ADZOA, except for if you're looking in the
42:49
programme of my Western debut where it was spelt wrong, but
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you know, we're going to let that slide.
42:54
And then on TikTok I'm at Soph with two HS dot A dot M.
42:59
Cool, thank you so much. I'll also link your socials in
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the podcast description as well. Thank you guys so much for
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listening to our conversation today.
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If you did enjoy it, please let us know.
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Leave a comment in the Q&A box underneath this episode.
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Thank you so much to Cure LGMD 2 I for sponsoring this podcast.
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Don't forget to follow it and rate it five stars.
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That really helps me out. And don't forget to subscribe if
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you're watching on YouTube. I'll be back with you guys very
43:25
soon with another episode, but until then, have a lovely week
43:28
or two. Bye.