Latest / The Everyday Awesome Project / 59: When a Door Closes: Move Forward Without Making Rejection Your Identity

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59: When a Door Closes: Move Forward Without Making Rejection Your Identity · The Everyday Awesome Project

• 0:27
  Polly Mertens: hey, superstars, welcome back polly here good morning, beautiful humans.
• 0:31
  Samantha Pruitt: Good morning, it's a morning we rarely tape in the morning I know here we are, look at us coffee.
• 0:37
  Samantha Pruitt: I got the memo oh, no way okay, we're hilarious.
• 0:42
  Samantha Pruitt: We did not that at all, but it's like the most super giant mug I have.
• 0:46
  Samantha Pruitt: You could literally swim.
• 0:47
  Samantha Pruitt: You could do a half Ironman swim in this mug.
• 0:52
  Polly Mertens: So Sam's talking about?
• 0:53
  Polly Mertens: We have our matching Ironman mugs.
• 0:56
  Polly Mertens: Yay, you've got world championship.
• 0:59
  Polly Mertens: I'm more obey.
• 1:00
  Polly Mertens: This is a collector's item, as as we know so well.
• 1:03
  Polly Mertens: Let's welcome everyone into our conversation today.
• 1:07
  Samantha Pruitt: Oh my gosh, this is so good.
• 1:10
  Polly Mertens: This is good stuff.
• 1:10
  Samantha Pruitt: As usual, like you know, relevant to what's happening in our lives and the lives of those we touch.
• 1:17
  Polly Mertens: Yeah.
• 1:17
  Polly Mertens: So four simple steps.
• 1:19
  Polly Mertens: When a door closes in life, right, and it's like you know, you think of like, oh, door closes, like slam, rejection or something, but we have different ways of looking at things, right, so let's set the stage, so you know.
• 1:33
  Polly Mertens: So what we're talking about here is, and you and I are like there's two usually, doors that close in life.
• 1:38
  Polly Mertens: One that you close, you're like, yeah, see you later.
• 1:41
  Polly Mertens: Got to go like done, we're ending this, or sayonara.
• 1:45
  Polly Mertens: Or one gets closed for you.
• 1:47
  Polly Mertens: I love how you frame that, because I said, oh, yeah, or a door closes and you're like, no, someone closes it for you, for you Exactly.
• 1:55
  Samantha Pruitt: Thank you very much.
• 1:56
  Samantha Pruitt: Right yeah, and so either way you'll be leaving.
• 1:59
  Polly Mertens: Yeah and well.
• 2:00
  Polly Mertens: What's what I love about that second part is, you know it, when someone closes it for you, it's like sometimes we don't take the initiative, we don't act, we don't, we're not ready, or there's a fear of the unknown.
• 2:10
  Polly Mertens: It's like, oh well, if I stop doing this job, this relationship, this identity that I've had, you know, this habit or whatever, like what then?
• 2:20
  Polly Mertens: Right, and so we kind of sit in this muck.
• 2:27
  Polly Mertens: You know how it feels when I've done this to myself, and it's just like you're in this like purgatory, like one foot in, but you want to be out, but you don't close the door for yourself, but, thankfully, universe, the person that you're with, whatever the boss, whatever closes the door for you, and so it initially let's unpack that one first, just a little bit deeper, now that we've sort of set the stage for the comparison and we'll get into when you willingly do it later.
• 2:51
  Samantha Pruitt: But when it closes for you and you're kind of, you know, setting a scenario there.
• 2:56
  Samantha Pruitt: So it could be you got let go from a job or a business that you own is closed for some other reason besides your choice.
• 3:05
  Samantha Pruitt: It could be relationship.
• 3:07
  Samantha Pruitt: You know the person leaves or asks you to leave.
• 3:11
  Samantha Pruitt: Whatever the scenarios, it could be friends and family.
• 3:15
  Samantha Pruitt: You know a lot of friend and family dynamic gets crazy at times, as we all know, and they could exit your life or ask you to exit your life.
• 3:25
  Samantha Pruitt: You know the relationship, in whatever capacity.
• 3:28
  Samantha Pruitt: It could be communities, you know where you like, let's say, I was, you know, in a group and I was participating on a team or in some kind of community group and then all of a sudden, um, it literally dissolves.
• 3:43
  Samantha Pruitt: I mean that happened a lot during the pandemic, things of that nature where people had their little hubs of love or circle or wherever they hung out and they thought that that was great because they'd been doing that for a long time.
• 3:55
  Samantha Pruitt: You know habits, patterns etc.
• 3:56
  Samantha Pruitt: And then it all, just whew was gone.
• 4:01
  Samantha Pruitt: You know that's an extreme situation, but so everybody's been through this.
• 4:06
  Polly Mertens: Yeah, and I think the one where you know the door, someone closes it for you, is a little bit more shocking.
• 4:11
  Polly Mertens: You know, to the, to your system, let's say so when you close the door.
• 4:15
  Polly Mertens: When you close the door, sometimes it could be like in a moment of passion or fury or something like you could close it and it's a little shocking to you also, but you taking the initiative, saying no, saying I'm not doing this, leaving whatever the move is, if you will, that jarring, but it's like instantly empowering.
• 4:32
  Polly Mertens: And I think when the door gets closed for you, the first response isn't always oh, I'm super empowered, right, it's more like it's disempowerment, Sometimes even the worst thing rejection.
• 4:45
  Samantha Pruitt: Right, that's a very common response Pain, hurt, rejection, feeling the feeling of I'm not good enough or I wasn't good enough.
• 4:53
  Samantha Pruitt: Yeah, I didn't make the cut.
• 4:55
  Polly Mertens: What did I do wrong I?
• 4:57
  Samantha Pruitt: no longer belong here.
• 4:58
  Polly Mertens: What's wrong with me?
• 4:59
  Samantha Pruitt: Things that are deeply painful, and one of the things we talked about in this scenario is it can really be incredibly triggering for people because of old wounds.
• 5:10
  Samantha Pruitt: What might that look like, polly?
• 5:13
  Polly Mertens: Well, you know, we, you know, we think that the things that happen to us in life and our response to them is like oh well, that makes sense or that's logical.
• 5:21
  Polly Mertens: Well, it's actually probably some old behaviors or some memories that are stored within us that something like that.
• 5:25
  Polly Mertens: Oh well, that makes sense or that's logical.
• 5:25
  Polly Mertens: Well, it's actually probably some old behaviors or some memories that are stored within us that something like that happened.
• 5:28
  Polly Mertens: You know, a kid rejected you, you didn't get picked on the playground.
• 5:31
  Polly Mertens: Or you know your parents got a divorce and you made it about like, oh, parents don't love me anymore, or whatever.
• 5:37
  Polly Mertens: Or a friend you know gives you a boundary and makes a hard line and, and you know, it feels like a breakup, if you will, right.
• 5:45
  Polly Mertens: And so we, we get these little childhood wounds that we walk around.
• 5:49
  Polly Mertens: You know, I've heard it talked about.
• 5:50
  Polly Mertens: It's kind of like if you have a wound on your skin, you know you have a little owie on your skin, and if the owie doesn't get bumped or doesn't get hurt, it's like, hey, you can kind of walk around with this little owie.
• 6:01
  Polly Mertens: But if someone comes along and they put sandpaper on that owie, you know they're like oh hey, that thing.
• 6:07
  Polly Mertens: You've been walking around with that open wound woof and you're like, oh, and it feels like in the moment your response to it is more dramatic or more impactful.
• 6:18
  Polly Mertens: Well, it's probably because there's something underneath that they need to unpack.
• 6:22
  Samantha Pruitt: Oh, definitely, oh definitely.
• 6:23
  Samantha Pruitt: I mean we both have seen this.
• 6:26
  Samantha Pruitt: Hopefully we haven't done it, but I'm not going to say I haven't.
• 6:34
  Samantha Pruitt: You know where you're in even a professional setting or whatever you know like a setting that you should be acting professionally.
• 6:40
  Samantha Pruitt: And then maybe somebody says, or there's some actions, and then all of a sudden, one person or the self reacts like a crazy person, like gets you know, overly dramatic, overly like under attack response kind of scenario and everyone's going what in the hell?
• 6:58
  Samantha Pruitt: Cause it doesn't, from the outside, make sense.
• 7:01
  Samantha Pruitt: That kind of hard reaction, that's that opening of the wound, the old trauma that you know we're witnessing in those people, and what we need at that time, by the way, is to show compassion for them.
• 7:11
  Samantha Pruitt: Yeah, however, generally we all counter-attack and then it turns into chaos and everybody leaves the room and there's a little more explosive disaster happening, you know, and that person uh, I gave an explanation of this recently in a professional setting where a lot of this was happening.
• 7:28
  Samantha Pruitt: There was all these negotiations and different dynamics happening and it was fascinating to be part of that and try and help them navigate it gracefully.
• 7:36
  Samantha Pruitt: But one of the scenarios that kind of came up and in this instance what it appeared to be is like the most wounded animal was the one that was attacking the most ferociously.
• 7:48
  Samantha Pruitt: It's like a, you know, almost appeared to be that this person was an animal that got backed into a cage.
• 7:53
  Samantha Pruitt: That was how they were expressing right and it was interesting to watch and try and navigate it gracefully, because it wasn't really the scenario that was causing this extreme reaction.
• 8:04
  Samantha Pruitt: It was their own personal stuff.
• 8:06
  Samantha Pruitt: They were bringing to the table to the conversation to the negotiation and this I think that happens frequently.
• 8:13
  Polly Mertens: Yeah, yeah.
• 8:14
  Polly Mertens: Well, and what I want to paint the picture with you know, doors closing whether you're the one closing the door or the door, someone else closes it for you, it's going to you're going to have an emotional response, you know, up down, whatever.
• 8:26
  Samantha Pruitt: So like that's totally normal, the steps we want to take you through today, yeah, Don't be like oh, you know we're good, yeah, it's all good, I'll get on with my life, and then you're really gutted.
• 8:35
  Polly Mertens: Feel it, yeah, feel it Right, cause how your life feels.
• 8:38
  Polly Mertens: You want to process these emotions.
• 8:40
  Polly Mertens: You don't want to, you know, suppress emotions like process, don't like ride the weight, you know, and I always don't like add, you know, water to something that's taking you downward.
• 8:50
  Polly Mertens: Don't put yourself into a quicksand and go downward, but like, like you know, I mean, this first step is that awareness right, like, well, I'm having this like major response in my body or minor response in my body, like, wow, I feel really sad right now.
• 9:03
  Polly Mertens: I feel hurt, I feel rejected, you know, whatever, and it could be a level five or a level 10, you know who knows.
• 9:14
  Polly Mertens: So be with it.
• 9:14
  Polly Mertens: And then we want to open you up to the steps that can help you guide and navigate that right, because you know some people can take a moment of rejection, a moment of a door closing for you and like wallow right for decades oh, oh, be paralyzed, yeah, be paralyzed in that moment of hurt and rejection and whatever their emotions were for them, for the individual, and just literally drowned in it.
• 9:36
  Samantha Pruitt: I would say, you know, just take a breath.
• 9:38
  Samantha Pruitt: That breath, by the way, it could take a week or days or a month or whatever but like that, pausing and reflecting, like what you're saying, on this situation, rather than immediately allowing the emotions to overwhelm you.
• 9:52
  Samantha Pruitt: Of course you're going to be emotional, but, like any time we have emotions, they need to be processed right, otherwise they get stored in the body.
• 10:00
  Samantha Pruitt: So they need to be worked through and processed.
• 10:03
  Samantha Pruitt: So, maybe you need to be alone.
• 10:04
  Samantha Pruitt: Maybe they need to be worked through and processed.
• 10:04
  Samantha Pruitt: So maybe you need to be alone.
• 10:05
  Samantha Pruitt: Maybe you need to be with a loved one.
• 10:06
  Samantha Pruitt: Maybe you need to be journaling Some way to move through.
• 10:11
  Samantha Pruitt: That is a natural grace to give yourself and don't automatically assume that it's you either Right Say more, no matter what that person told you yeah, boss or partner or friend or whatever.
• 10:26
  Samantha Pruitt: The blame and shame game, no matter what was said.
• 10:29
  Samantha Pruitt: Don't attach to the words that were said.
• 10:33
  Polly Mertens: Liberate yourself from those yeah, and that's the two things I wanted to say as you were saying that that I think um were came up for me.
• 10:39
  Polly Mertens: One is the story so there's what's so right, like someone closed the door or you said you stepped away from something, right, you closed the door.
• 10:47
  Polly Mertens: In that moment, your mind is instantly going to start making meaning right, like that's what it does.
• 10:54
  Polly Mertens: It's like moments happen, situations happen, people say things and the mind goes what does that mean?
• 10:58
  Polly Mertens: What does that mean?
• 10:59
  Polly Mertens: Right, you don't even notice it, but it's doing that.
• 11:01
  Polly Mertens: And so, like you said, if you go into this pity party, this wallowing, it's like I'm not good enough.
• 11:07
  Polly Mertens: They hate me.
• 11:08
  Polly Mertens: I'm never going to, you know, I'm never going to find love again, whatever Right.
• 11:12
  Polly Mertens: So notice the meaning that your mind starts to make and don't get attached to it, because you're probably in a heated moment.
• 11:19
  Samantha Pruitt: Right.
• 11:20
  Polly Mertens: And then the second is you name some things to do, like step away from it.
• 11:23
  Polly Mertens: In a moment I had recently we could talk about you know, this happens to us all the time these things that we bring up in our podcast and it's like so I had a door closed for me and I was like I instantly wanted to reach out, actually, like I wanted support, like I wanted to talk to people.
• 11:37
  Polly Mertens: It wasn't like, oh, I should just go home and like think about this and do this process.
• 11:42
  Polly Mertens: It was like, no, maybe support is exactly what you need.
• 11:44
  Polly Mertens: You know, just having your friends be there for you just to keep you up and lift you up, like hey, you know what this just happened.
• 11:51
  Polly Mertens: Or celebrate Like, oh my God, the store closed.
• 11:53
  Samantha Pruitt: You know I hadn't done it for myself, but it just closed and you know, woohoo right so whatever you know, rephrasing how we have you, you know, rephrasing how we have, you know, this door they closed it for you does give an underlying message and feeling, evokes a feeling of it's a gift.
• 12:12
  Samantha Pruitt: Sometimes gifts are painful but, they're freaking liberating.
• 12:17
  Polly Mertens: So let's walk them through what we would say some steps that we came up with.
• 12:20
  Polly Mertens: We were talking about it a little bit, we're kind of bouncing around it, but I would say the first step that I thought of and we think is, you know, valuable is shifting the energy in that moment, right, so there's something that wants to be released.
• 12:33
  Polly Mertens: So, like this happened to me recently had a project I've been working on and with some people, and I've been wanting to not be on this project anymore, I was like this is the same what I thought it was going to be.
• 12:46
  Polly Mertens: It's not quite working out.
• 12:46
  Polly Mertens: You know, don't make me see eye to eye, but I was kind of sitting in this middle ground, like should I stay, should I go, should I see out this project, whatever?
• 12:53
  Polly Mertens: And when they, you know, when they said, hey, you know what, I think we're going to end this, and I was like, oh my God, like super liberating.
• 13:00
  Polly Mertens: But what I had felt and you helped me with this because it happened recently is there was a lot of just built up, kind of crunchy, yucky, negative energy that I'd been, you know, been building, you know, kind of like accumulating, accumulating around this project, like this didn't work and that wasn't great, and these people and this and that and whatever.
• 13:18
  Polly Mertens: So my first step was like a releasing right.
• 13:21
  Polly Mertens: So I literally like came home, took a shower.
• 13:23
  Polly Mertens: Step was like a releasing right.
• 13:26
  Polly Mertens: So I literally like came home, took a shower, put on new clothes, took myself out.
• 13:30
  Polly Mertens: I was just like I feel like get out of that energy right, and that can be a very different ceremonial Anything you want to say about that, that releasing the old right.
• 13:36
  Samantha Pruitt: Yeah, it's a recalibration of all the things, but in particular of your energy, and then that leads to the mindset and the emotions attached to it.
• 13:44
  Samantha Pruitt: But that has to first come from some actions, right?
• 13:49
  Samantha Pruitt: So if you just sat there, you know, in your car or wherever you were, when the thing transpired right, and didn't take any action to move the energy and reset the mindset, it would stay within the body.
• 14:04
  Samantha Pruitt: So, for me, a lot of times I'll go for a hike or a run or a bike ride, I'll get outside, I'll start moving my body.
• 14:11
  Samantha Pruitt: I literally come back.
• 14:12
  Samantha Pruitt: A different person.
• 14:13
  Samantha Pruitt: Yeah, yeah, you know, but we've I mean, who hasn't been off a project or a job?
• 14:19
  Samantha Pruitt: You know that they had a certain idea it was gonna keep going or whatever job you know that they had a certain idea it was going to keep going, or whatever I mean.
• 14:31
  Samantha Pruitt: Or who hasn't had a relationship, and I mean everybody can relate to this.
• 14:33
  Samantha Pruitt: And I think what's so cool about how you just told your story and I know you know it happened recently and it was really beautiful to be part of it with you was I mean we really didn't celebrate with you.
• 14:46
  Samantha Pruitt: Was I mean we really didn't celebrate, even though somebody closed the door for you?
• 14:49
  Samantha Pruitt: It was a hallelujah moment of liberation.
• 14:50
  Samantha Pruitt: Sure, there's still like some loss and some emotion around.
• 14:54
  Samantha Pruitt: Wow, I had a lot invested in that and I was putting a lot of energy into that.
• 14:58
  Samantha Pruitt: You know, I see things through and I had a vision.
• 15:00
  Samantha Pruitt: All the things, of course.
• 15:00
  Samantha Pruitt: Yeah, see things through and I had a vision.
• 15:02
  Samantha Pruitt: All the things, of course, yeah, totally.
• 15:04
  Samantha Pruitt: All of that is also true, but both things can be true, yeah.
• 15:10
  Polly Mertens: Both things can be true, and I think about the time in some relationship where a door is closed, for you know, in relationship, let's say an intimate relationship, and one of the things I wanted to yeah, exactly, yeah, exactly.
• 15:21
  Samantha Pruitt: Ooh, talk about an investment.
• 15:23
  Samantha Pruitt: This was going to go a whole other way, and you and I have both the energy kind of clearing the decks, like like just in, and so it's kind of what that brings.
• 15:32
  Samantha Pruitt: Yeah, I was gonna say detox or ceremony right.
• 15:53
  Polly Mertens: Yeah, there could be something like I did some beautiful ceremonies in my.
• 15:57
  Polly Mertens: I had a friend pass away, that's what.
• 15:58
  Polly Mertens: Not exactly the same.
• 15:59
  Polly Mertens: You know door closes if you will, but that relationship door closed because he passed away, to the beautiful ceremony to you know door closes if you will, but that relationship door closed because he passed away, did a beautiful ceremony to you know say goodbye and stuff like that.
• 16:07
  Polly Mertens: So if ceremony feels like it's something that resonates for you in that, whatever that, whatever phase you're in right, so it could be just like oh, like I need to celebrate or I need to reach out to a friend or I need some quiet time or whatever.
• 16:25
  Samantha Pruitt: Go for a run, go for a hike, you know, go for a drive, right, I love this idea of ceremony.
• 16:27
  Samantha Pruitt: I just got a vision of you know, being part of, or facilitating or whatever.
• 16:30
  Samantha Pruitt: Like you know, when somebody becomes single again, what a freaking cool ceremony that could be.
• 16:36
  Samantha Pruitt: I'm not talking about crazy Las Vegas bachelor weirdness, like I'm talking about, like ceremonial, the being back into the solo sphere and being a fully liberated person and whatever that experience is for everybody.
• 16:53
  Samantha Pruitt: Gosh, why don't we do have these?
• 16:55
  Polly Mertens: as part of society.
• 16:56
  Polly Mertens: You know it's true Cause I can remember when my divorce happened I felt this trepidation, like I still felt attached because I didn't do something like this.
• 17:05
  Polly Mertens: Now that we're talking about this, I'm like man to honor and close that out.
• 17:10
  Polly Mertens: It's like it's so slowly unwound itself.
• 17:13
  Polly Mertens: You might say, like I didn't date right away, I didn't like put myself on the market or whatever.
• 17:16
  Polly Mertens: It took, you know, good six to eight months or whatever.
• 17:19
  Polly Mertens: But if I had done a ceremony at least I would have been open to that idea.
• 17:23
  Polly Mertens: Not that I want it, whatever, but having that closure or honoring whatever that was, if that feels good right, I freaking love this and honor yourself honor yourself like, okay, I'm complete with that.
• 17:36
  Samantha Pruitt: Yeah it's so cool.
• 17:38
  Samantha Pruitt: I have a friend, a gym friend, who's been getting a divorce for over a year, over a year, and it's really just, you know, blown her life as she knew it out.
• 17:50
  Samantha Pruitt: And she's just sort of hanging on by a thread there, you know, and it's really hard to watch and to support, because she's trapped in that moment and I think things like this could be powerful.
• 18:03
  Samantha Pruitt: You know, when someone closes a door on you at work or in a career project or at school, you know, maybe like you're chipping along and you think you're going to be a doctor, or you're going to be this or that or whatever, and then, for whatever reason, you don't get accepted into that program and they close the door and then there's no more opportunity.
• 18:21
  Samantha Pruitt: Or, um, I know a couple of people um, this is interesting.
• 18:25
  Samantha Pruitt: You know, like my son is colorblind, my dad was colorblind and there was a friend of mine who was colorblind.
• 18:30
  Samantha Pruitt: He really wanted to be a pilot.
• 18:31
  Samantha Pruitt: You can't be a pilot.
• 18:33
  Samantha Pruitt: I mean so like things are just part of who you are in the world.
• 18:38
  Samantha Pruitt: And then you think you're going to have this dream life of doing the X, y, z, and then they go oh, you didn't pass that test, you're no longer going down that road, right right yeah, people have to really just figure out.
• 18:53
  Samantha Pruitt: Reset, yeah, reset, recalibrate.
• 18:56
  Samantha Pruitt: Figure out who they really are.
• 18:58
  Samantha Pruitt: Don't get attached to the story.
• 19:00
  Polly Mertens: I love that yeah, or you know, be mindful of the story and weave the web you know of what you want.
• 19:06
  Polly Mertens: So I want to go into our second step, which is you know, this is what, yeah.
• 19:12
  Polly Mertens: So I think the natural next step is like, what are your takeaways?
• 19:16
  Polly Mertens: Like, like doing a journaling, yeah, I get the lessons, get the gifts, the takeaways, what, what, what did this teach you, right?
• 19:25
  Polly Mertens: What do you know more about yourself, about life, about about people, whatever that, having been through this experience, been with this person, been in this job, had this closed?
• 19:34
  Polly Mertens: What do you know more about the people yourself?
• 19:37
  Samantha Pruitt: like that, right well, that really takes a whole other mind shift.
• 19:43
  Samantha Pruitt: What are the gifts and lessons?
• 19:44
  Samantha Pruitt: You said no because you have to be totally with yourself, right and providing a space for yourself of compassion and grace and love, to say, hey, part of me or parts of me are better because of this door was closed.
• 20:05
  Samantha Pruitt: What are those parts?
• 20:06
  Samantha Pruitt: How can I identify with those parts?
• 20:09
  Samantha Pruitt: So what would be some gifts?
• 20:10
  Samantha Pruitt: Give me some examples of what you've experienced as lessons or gifts.
• 20:14
  Polly Mertens: Oh well, you know, I just did two pages.
• 20:17
  Polly Mertens: Oh, my goodness, yeah, when I was doing the gifts and lessons, yeah, yeah, no doubt Because we talked about this and I was like, yeah, I'm going to look at them for this.
• 20:24
  Polly Mertens: Yeah, I mean one of the things, yeah, one of the things I want, yeah, right, like life is a school, like we are here.
• 20:33
  Polly Mertens: We are here growing ourselves, getting to know ourselves more, reminding ourselves of who we are, and when we do things or we step into situations where it's wonky or it doesn't work out.
• 20:43
  Polly Mertens: It's often because either, like mine, like clearly it was a moment of compromise I took something, I took some work, a project that it wasn't checking all my boxes but I still took it Right.
• 20:54
  Polly Mertens: And so, like, one of my greatest ones is like, it's like there is no satisfaction in work that is taken from a place of compromise.
• 21:03
  Polly Mertens: Oh wow, that's one of my.
• 21:05
  Polly Mertens: That was my number one.
• 21:05
  Polly Mertens: That was my first takeaway not my number one, but that was my first one.
• 21:08
  Polly Mertens: That was my first takeaway, not my number one, but that was my first one.
• 21:10
  Polly Mertens: And I would say some of the takeaway is like looking at the experience ie let's say it's a month or six years or whatever it is of that.
• 21:16
  Polly Mertens: So you might have like years or that, and then it might be in that moment Like so the door closing for me instead of me closing the door, there's a lesson in why didn't I close that door sooner, right?
• 21:29
  Polly Mertens: So the lesson can be the, the, the.
• 21:30
  Polly Mertens: You know what I was doing at the end.
• 21:32
  Polly Mertens: Or you know, like sitting in work that wasn't fulfilling, satisfying me and not acting.
• 21:38
  Polly Mertens: It's like okay, what's the lesson in the future?
• 21:40
  Polly Mertens: You know, if it's not satisfying in the beginning, it's not going to be satisfying in the end.
• 21:43
  Polly Mertens: You know, take a step sooner, right.
• 21:47
  Samantha Pruitt: Yeah.
• 21:47
  Polly Mertens: So like, uh, I don't know, get out as soon as you realize that it's not good when you're compromising your values, you're eating into your emotional spiritual satisfaction also, right?
• 21:57
  Polly Mertens: Um, I also like good things, like people are inherently good.
• 22:01
  Polly Mertens: That was one of my takeaways Like people are inherently good.
• 22:03
  Polly Mertens: I took away a lot of good experiences, relationships, um, I'm a higher quality person for the things that I learned during that process.
• 22:13
  Polly Mertens: So lots of skills.
• 22:16
  Samantha Pruitt: I mean, skills are learned.
• 22:17
  Samantha Pruitt: In the school of life, too, skills are learned.
• 22:21
  Samantha Pruitt: So you obviously all of us take away skills as we move above and beyond.
• 22:26
  Samantha Pruitt: You know, like, if it's some relationship, maybe you learned the skill of standing up and speaking up for yourself or listening to your gut or whatever.
• 22:35
  Samantha Pruitt: If it's in the workspace, maybe you literally learned technical skills on the job to do a certain thing, or you became an expert at a certain thing, and that's incredibly powerful.
• 22:46
  Samantha Pruitt: As you move forward in your life and decide what you want to do next, Maybe you learned you hate that line of work.
• 22:51
  Samantha Pruitt: I thought this was going to be so fun.
• 22:54
  Samantha Pruitt: It's the opposite of fun.
• 22:56
  Samantha Pruitt: I'm not going to go back into that type of work.
• 23:00
  Samantha Pruitt: You know, like there's so many opportunities for less.
• 23:03
  Polly Mertens: Like I remember talking to this student in college and this is a recent, you know, I'm not in college, but this person was this college student and they were saying, oh yeah, I started taking classes, I want to say, in architectural engineering or something.
• 23:17
  Polly Mertens: She's like I thought I wanted to be an engineering architect or something and she goes and that was definitely not it Right.
• 23:23
  Polly Mertens: So in those when we're literally in school and we shift, like it's not, it's not a surprise, it's like, oh yeah, I took a couple classes, surprised it doesn't happen more.
• 23:35
  Samantha Pruitt: It's so freaking shocking to me that young people can go in at whatever 18, 19, 20, whatever and then they're like, yeah, I'm gonna do this the rest of my life.
• 23:45
  Samantha Pruitt: No, you're not.
• 23:46
  Samantha Pruitt: I mean, how many people are to do this the rest of my life?
• 23:47
  Samantha Pruitt: No, you're not, I mean, how many people are going to do that the rest of their life?
• 23:50
  Polly Mertens: Small percentage, right?
• 23:51
  Polly Mertens: Yeah?
• 23:51
  Polly Mertens: Yeah, you know, and I think one of the things in relationship that we do, and maybe in work too, is, you know, we're all walking around with a little bit of standards, expectations of like knowing ourselves and what we will accept or what we won't accept, or what we bring to the table, like, wait a minute, I put a lot of this to the table and that wasn't appreciated.
• 24:10
  Polly Mertens: I want to go somewhere where this part of me is appreciated and valued and celebrated, right?
• 24:17
  Polly Mertens: So that list of what we accepted or what we thought we wanted 10 years ago, two weeks ago, whatever, and we got into something it's like oh wait, no, I learned that this about myself or this about the people that I relate with, this is what I had.
• 24:32
  Samantha Pruitt: A lot of that lately being in projects, whether being self employed or contracted or whatever.
• 24:39
  Samantha Pruitt: A lot of my work is project based.
• 24:41
  Samantha Pruitt: So people will hire me for certain skills or bring me on to a team dynamic because of certain skills how they perceive me to be in the world and what they think I'm going to offer, no matter what my resume says or my experience or even maybe what I tell them.
• 24:58
  Samantha Pruitt: Right, and then I go into that environment and then this is my own personal learnings and takeaway lessons is I've had enough of those recently, especially post pandemic.
• 25:10
  Samantha Pruitt: I've had enough of those recently, especially post-pandemic.
• 25:11
  Samantha Pruitt: I've done a lot of different projects.
• 25:13
  Samantha Pruitt: I mean really kind of a whole, you know, wheelhouse of crazy stuff, and I was expressing to you about one I'm currently in that I really was attracted to the company, the values, the vision, the amount of diversity and inclusivity in this space, all of the beautiful things.
• 25:28
  Samantha Pruitt: Love it, love it.
• 25:29
  Samantha Pruitt: And then was in there doing the thing, offering my gifts and skills, but kept bumping into some walls around, lack of communication or lack of follow through or things where I felt like I was being held back and couldn't fully deliver on what I brought to the table, on what I brought to the table as well as was I fully being seen, heard and recognized based on what I thought I was going to be doing there, that kind of dynamic right, and that can be really bumpy and messy Because you're maybe the new kid on the block or you're new to the relationship or new to the team and you're like, should I speak up?
• 26:08
  Samantha Pruitt: Well, I mean, how listen, I'm 55 now I speak up and even after 50, it was like the switch.
• 26:15
  Samantha Pruitt: I speak up about everything.
• 26:17
  Samantha Pruitt: I'm very, you know, professional and nice and loving about it.
• 26:20
  Samantha Pruitt: I'm not an a-hole about it, but I definitely don't hold back my personal expression, ideas or thoughts anymore, and so it's really wonderful.
• 26:30
  Samantha Pruitt: They responded exceptionally well and the process of, you know, recalibrating the situation so I could actually stay in it and they could get what they needed and I could get what I needed.
• 26:41
  Samantha Pruitt: We could do amazing work together in the world.
• 26:44
  Samantha Pruitt: I mean it was great because I spoke up.
• 26:45
  Samantha Pruitt: I was going to say it's possible because you introduced the conversation right and I can tell you some of the relationships other in the world.
• 26:47
  Samantha Pruitt: I mean it was great because I spoke up.
• 26:48
  Polly Mertens: I was going to say it's possible because you introduced the conversation right, and I can tell you some of the relationships that I was in that I'm no longer in.
• 26:56
  Polly Mertens: If I had spoken up and like what you're saying earlier on, they wouldn't have lasted as long as I did.
• 27:01
  Polly Mertens: I was kept keeping to myself and like, oh, maybe not this or whatever, and I think there are nice ways.
• 27:08
  Polly Mertens: Like you said, you weren't an asshole about it, right.
• 27:10
  Polly Mertens: So having the conversation because there is some part of you that wants to speak and be heard and be seen and isn't, it's not right.
• 27:23
  Samantha Pruitt: Yeah project, rather than, if I didn't and I allowed this to fester I would have eventually closed the door without the conversation, without being seen, heard and really explored whatever was possible there, or they would have eventually asked me to leave the project because it wasn't working out, because it wasn't the match that we thought it was going to be right.
• 27:43
  Samantha Pruitt: So what I'm saying this all full circle is expectations.
• 27:47
  Samantha Pruitt: I went in with expectations, they went with expectations.
• 27:50
  Samantha Pruitt: Everybody does this and those expectations can be where the communication breakdown happens.
• 27:57
  Samantha Pruitt: And many, many times, whether it's, you know, during the closing of the door moment, like how many times have you left a job or left a relationship and you're like I should have said that.
• 28:09
  Samantha Pruitt: I wish I'd said that, but you were so emotionally overwhelmed you didn't.
• 28:15
  Polly Mertens: Or resigned, or resigned, you know, because, as you were saying this, I love you know this is fresh for you, so you're like taking these things in and you're.
• 28:22
  Polly Mertens: But you know, let's say you had sat in this, which you I don't think ever would now or in the past, but let's say you sat in this job.
• 28:29
  Samantha Pruitt: Oh, I've sat in shit before.
• 28:30
  Samantha Pruitt: Yeah, I know what it smells like.
• 28:34
  Samantha Pruitt: I know exactly what it feels like.
• 28:35
  Samantha Pruitt: You know what I'm talking about.
• 28:36
  Polly Mertens: You're like oh well, maybe this will just get better on its own.
• 28:39
  Polly Mertens: But you know, or we start to try and nullify some of our expectations, or like oh, that's maybe that's.
• 28:45
  Polly Mertens: Maybe that's not as important as I thought it was right.
• 28:48
  Polly Mertens: So we're getting off on the like what to do before the door closes conversation.
• 28:52
  Samantha Pruitt: Yeah, let's get back into our steps.
• 28:53
  Samantha Pruitt: How do we?
• 28:54
  Polly Mertens: prevent that, but that's so important.
• 28:56
  Polly Mertens: So, yeah, so spend a moment, at least take a breath and like, get the gift right, because especially the ones that are bigger doors, you know there's little doors that close You're like, oh, that doesn't bother you too much, but there's probably still a lesson or a gift in it.
• 29:16
  Polly Mertens: Number three yeah, and so you've cleared the energy right, so you've met ceremony or just shifted your energy, you've honored that time right, you've found the gifts, you pulled out the lessons, I would say.
• 29:22
  Polly Mertens: Then you're in a space for opportunities, like, what next?
• 29:26
  Polly Mertens: What you know, dreamscapingcaping, like, like, where do I want to go with this?
• 29:29
  Polly Mertens: What's possible, especially if it was a job or project or an opportunity that closed and you're like, holy crap, like not doing that anymore, what you know, what am I doing?
• 29:38
  Polly Mertens: Going right into, oh, I need to find the next thing, I need to get online and find a job.
• 29:42
  Polly Mertens: You know, like, whatever I made, yeah, it's probably in a place of desperation or not wrapping things up, but once you've come to that space and that can come quickly, it can come in a couple of hours or a couple of days, right, yeah, but if you haven't done the other two steps, you could be also coming from a place of unworthiness and settling yet again.
• 30:06
  Samantha Pruitt: It can be a pattern for people, right?
• 30:09
  Samantha Pruitt: We get stuck in these grooves, in these patterns of how we pick jobs, how we pick mates, how we pick opportunities, circumstances, and you could deliver yourself onto the doorstep of the exact same thing.
• 30:20
  Samantha Pruitt: You just walk up, but it looks so different.
• 30:23
  Samantha Pruitt: It's blonde now instead of a brunette, or it's you know.
• 30:26
  Samantha Pruitt: Now I'm in a suit and before I was in a you know uniform or whatever it could be.
• 30:31
  Samantha Pruitt: Still the same experience.
• 30:33
  Samantha Pruitt: We don't want that for you.
• 30:35
  Polly Mertens: Yeah, so you know, and and in some way like why I said you know, I reached out to friends right after the store was closed.
• 30:41
  Polly Mertens: For me it was like I wanted to, you know, a celebrate Cause.
• 30:44
  Polly Mertens: I thought it was a good thing.
• 30:45
  Polly Mertens: Like instantly, I'm like made good meaning.
• 30:47
  Polly Mertens: I'm like, yeah, Right, and I've had friends call me when they lose a job or a project and I celebrate with them.
• 30:53
  Polly Mertens: I'm like, hey, that's great, and they're not maybe in the space, but, like I see it for them, I'm like great new opportunities.
• 30:58
  Polly Mertens: So, um, it's rebuilding your sense of worth and value is what you're talking about Right.
• 31:05
  Polly Mertens: So if you go in and go, oh, that door closed on me, I'm not good enough, I'm never whatever.
• 31:11
  Polly Mertens: And then we walk into the marketplace relationship marketplace or business marketplace we're like, what can I offer?
• 31:19
  Polly Mertens: Where's my value?
• 31:20
  Polly Mertens: And we've negated our full potential right and.
• 31:25
  Samantha Pruitt: I think this is the most important step, as you're really unpacking it for us.
• 31:30
  Samantha Pruitt: Re-evaluating and coming to real grips with I mean taking in wholeheartedly your true value, skills, gifts, potential is probably the most important, no matter who's closing the door, because if you don't take time to do that and maybe that's part of step number three is also taking an inventory of hey, I'm a pretty kick ass human.
• 32:00
  Samantha Pruitt: Let me tell you all about it.
• 32:02
  Samantha Pruitt: And you're literally talking to yourself in the mirror, writing this shit down, right Like to a friend or whatever, exactly Like you and I could be like okay, you know what are all the skills.
• 32:10
  Samantha Pruitt: Let's make a list All we can do, these 50,000 million things we were running out of paper, right, like, sometimes you need someone to do that with you also.
• 32:18
  Samantha Pruitt: But if you don't take time to do that, I think this is really.
• 32:23
  Samantha Pruitt: It's almost tragic.
• 32:26
  Samantha Pruitt: I hate to say it, but if you don't take that experience full circle in terms of really reconnecting to yourself with love and compassion and understanding about who you are, and then you move forward, you're no-transcript.
• 33:11
  Polly Mertens: If you feel great about yourself, like you won't just accept any day, you won't.
• 33:16
  Polly Mertens: You know.
• 33:16
  Polly Mertens: You know you're going to be like I have something to offer my next relationship.
• 33:21
  Polly Mertens: I've taken all these gifts away.
• 33:23
  Polly Mertens: I've learned a lot about myself.
• 33:25
  Polly Mertens: I am a beautiful soul, human right.
• 33:27
  Polly Mertens: Somebody would love to be my partner.
• 33:30
  Samantha Pruitt: Yeah, it reminds me of like when you want to PR for a race.
• 33:33
  Samantha Pruitt: So you know, we've set big athletic goals and sometimes we achieve them and sometimes we don't.
• 33:37
  Samantha Pruitt: So when we don't and the goal was to do a PR on a marathon or whatever I'm just using that as an example and we don't, for whatever reasons, it doesn't happen, do we sign up for the next weekend Because we think that the next weekend we'll PR, and then the next weekend and then the next weekend.
• 33:55
  Samantha Pruitt: All we do is bury ourself because we haven't fully recovered physically, but we also haven't fully recovered mentally and emotionally to really deliver our best our PR.
• 34:10
  Samantha Pruitt: In whatever the scenario is, it takes time for a full recovery people.
• 34:15
  Polly Mertens: It really does.
• 34:16
  Polly Mertens: Yeah, yeah.
• 34:17
  Polly Mertens: And I think if we don't honor, like the, you know so, if you just the door closes and you just go down the hallway and you go to the looking for the next one, right, you go into the marketplace looking for the next one, we probably don't.
• 34:30
  Polly Mertens: I want to say, like the, the act of turning back, honoring that space, that experience, honoring what we learned and what we grew and we got out of like you're taking gold with you, right, it's like you are a bigger, brighter, shining example of your self expression in the world.
• 34:49
  Polly Mertens: And it's like, if you only thought of, like who you were, you know, when you started that relationship, you're not up leveling yourself, you're not taking yourself to what's possible for you.
• 35:00
  Samantha Pruitt: You shouldn't even wear the same suit, yeah, or clothes, or whatever.
• 35:02
  Samantha Pruitt: You shouldn't even wear the same suit or clothes, or whatever.
• 35:04
  Samantha Pruitt: You shouldn't.
• 35:05
  Samantha Pruitt: Yeah, you know I love um.
• 35:08
  Samantha Pruitt: It's so symbolic.
• 35:09
  Samantha Pruitt: You know part of what you did.
• 35:10
  Samantha Pruitt: You know showering, washing your beautiful hair, letting your hair down.
• 35:16
  Samantha Pruitt: You'd been in this very grind, work, physical, masculine space, doing this very huge project and then you all of a sudden were like, oh yeah, the feminine in me needs to come back out, which is just completely a huge part of who you are.
• 35:30
  Samantha Pruitt: You know, hair down, let's put some makeup on, put a dress on.
• 35:32
  Samantha Pruitt: I'm going to go out, I'm going to have a nice dinner Like I'm going to reintegrate back into myself in full bloom.
• 35:41
  Polly Mertens: Dude, stand up tall shoulders back Like like, hey, I like I'm amazing, like that experience wasn't a fit right, I was compromising things.
• 35:51
  Polly Mertens: I was, you know, doing work that wasn't as, and I learned that through the process.
• 35:55
  Polly Mertens: You know, I thought it was.
• 35:56
  Polly Mertens: I was like this isn't a line, maybe this could work, right, but I but I walked and then I went hold up, I am bigger, brighter.
• 36:03
  Polly Mertens: But I walked and then I went hold up, I am bigger, brighter, better, right, because of it, and just who I am in the world.
• 36:07
  Polly Mertens: Like I just honor myself, honor my stories.
• 36:10
  Polly Mertens: I don't say, oh, look, I couldn't do that, and they close the door for me, oh, maybe I'm not so good, right, and then I just take less, less, less, hell no, hell no.
• 36:20
  Samantha Pruitt: Well, those are reasons that many people don't close the door themselves, right?
• 36:26
  Samantha Pruitt: What stops people from doing that?
• 36:28
  Samantha Pruitt: Yeah, a lack of all that Mm-hmm.
• 36:32
  Polly Mertens: And a big one, is the fear of the unknown, right?
• 36:34
  Polly Mertens: Oh yeah, because I mean I can tell you sitting the amount of months, years, no years in relationships where I tried to we're working on the relationship, right, and that was me not always fully expressing, but it was like this needed to go right.
• 36:50
  Polly Mertens: So you sit in this like muck and it's like because some of it's like, well, I don't know what it's like outside, like oh, having to date again, you know, or having to, will I ever find someone new?
• 36:59
  Polly Mertens: Or maybe I should just quote settle for this instead of stepping out and seeing what else is possible, right, and you do that in work as well.
• 37:07
  Polly Mertens: It's like, oh well, at least it's a steady paycheck, at least I know these things, at least you know whatever it's like.
• 37:13
  Polly Mertens: No, that is not a good reason to invest another day of your life with that person or with that business.
• 37:21
  Samantha Pruitt: Hell, no, hell, no.
• 37:23
  Samantha Pruitt: What's step number four?
• 37:25
  Polly Mertens: Last make some decisions and take some action, right, so like and that's going to look different, right, it's like all right, what am I doing now?
• 37:35
  Polly Mertens: All right, let's decide on a course of action and get into it, right.
• 37:40
  Samantha Pruitt: Don't stay stuck.
• 37:42
  Samantha Pruitt: Yeah, Take some freaking action and it can be really small steps.
• 37:46
  Samantha Pruitt: You know, sometimes you're going to go slower and the steps are going to be smaller.
• 37:51
  Samantha Pruitt: Sometimes it's going to be radical massive.
• 37:55
  Polly Mertens: Yeah, you know, I mean, yeah, it can look a lot of different things and I think if you've done the steps that we talked about, you know you've gotten the closure.
• 38:03
  Polly Mertens: You release some energy maybe ceremony, honored, something, taking the gifts, you really feel yourself, you've opened up your mind, your dreamscape, your imagination to all possibility and what could I do?
• 38:14
  Polly Mertens: And then you just decide and guess what it may not be.
• 38:18
  Polly Mertens: The first action is going to lead to like boom, boom, boom.
• 38:20
  Polly Mertens: This is just humming.
• 38:21
  Polly Mertens: Or like the first person that you get you get, you know, go out on a coffee date with is like magic, right, but it's the, it's getting back in the game, it's getting back in action, getting like, and it's going to teach you some more things, as life always does and recognizing that when you move forward, you make, uh, some decisions and you take some action.
• 38:40
  Samantha Pruitt: You're not the same person.
• 38:42
  Samantha Pruitt: You're not the same person.
• 38:45
  Samantha Pruitt: You're not taking that backpack full of bricks that you just took off when the door closed, or somebody took it off your back.
• 38:53
  Samantha Pruitt: You're not taking it with you.
• 38:54
  Samantha Pruitt: It's not going with you.
• 38:55
  Samantha Pruitt: You are not the same person, please, yeah and depending on what you know.
• 39:00
  Polly Mertens: There's a beautiful quote.
• 39:02
  Polly Mertens: It's the universe abhors a vacuum, right, and so it's physics Right, and so it will fill it.
• 39:09
  Polly Mertens: It naturally fills it, like, if you know, in the world of Feng Shui we talk about it as like, if you remove something from your house or you empty out a drawer, it's like in a couple of months things will be showing back up, or the closet gets cleared out and more stuff, or your purse or whatever Right, the closet gets cleared out and more stuff, or your purse or whatever right.
• 39:30
  Polly Mertens: So like, that's a physical way you could say it.
• 39:31
  Polly Mertens: But the same is true for the vacuum that's created by the door being closed.
• 39:33
  Polly Mertens: So I always look at that like, wow, this area of my life, I now am open, right, I'm back open to the space of receiving, right, and I think, if we position ourselves, we position our mindset and our energy of like I've up, leveled, I've learned more, I've expanded, I'm a more bigger expression of myself, we welcome in, you know, those new opportunities.
• 39:52
  Polly Mertens: You know, like you said, you're not the same person because your energy is different.
• 39:55
  Polly Mertens: You've shifted.
• 39:56
  Polly Mertens: If you've allowed that Good stuff, take massive action, you know, try different things.
• 40:01
  Polly Mertens: You know, I often find it's like this is an opportunity for you to, like you know, explore.
• 40:05
  Polly Mertens: You know, depending on where you are in your life, maybe you do a lot of little different things, maybe do something you've never done.
• 40:10
  Polly Mertens: Maybe you, instead of going right back and getting a job, take some, take a trip, go you know whatever, take a class right, go back to school.
• 40:16
  Polly Mertens: Who know?
• 40:17
  Samantha Pruitt: exactly, allow it to be limitless yeah, yeah.
• 40:22
  Polly Mertens: So just to recap, first step, you know, release it process, change the energy.
• 40:26
  Polly Mertens: Second step get the lesson, get the gift.
• 40:28
  Polly Mertens: Third step dreamscape, imagine what's possible.
• 40:32
  Polly Mertens: And four decide and take some action, like you're a new you, a better you.
• 40:35
  Polly Mertens: It's a good thing that this happened for you, right, all right.
• 40:40
  Polly Mertens: So what's the one thing we want to remind them of?
• 40:43
  Polly Mertens: What's the one thing?
• 40:44
  Polly Mertens: If they only got one thing out of today's episode and you said it, I'll say it back to you.
• 41:18
  Samantha Pruitt: Yeah.
• 41:19
  Polly Mertens: Don't choose, because it is a choice to be a victim.
• 41:20
  Polly Mertens: If somebody closes the door upon you, or if you choose to close the door, whatever the scenario is, don't drop into that as a victim.
• 41:23
  Polly Mertens: How would you say that differently?
• 41:24
  Polly Mertens: That's what's so like.
• 41:25
  Polly Mertens: The door is closed, so what like?
• 41:25
  Polly Mertens: So what are you going to do now?
• 41:26
  Polly Mertens: Right, and anything that you say after that.
• 41:29
  Polly Mertens: So what the meaning that you make right of like the door closed?
• 41:33
  Polly Mertens: The story that you tell yourself is going to disempower you or it's going to empower you and tell an empowering story, because guess what it is like.
• 41:40
  Polly Mertens: I don't know about you, but when I, you know, hindsight 2020.
• 41:44
  Polly Mertens: We always have the perspective Once we look back, you know, in a month from that door closing, six years from that door closing, whatever you go, that was probably the best moment of my life, or I'm so glad that happened, or what a gift that was.
• 41:55
  Polly Mertens: We can't necessarily the lens can be.
• 41:57
  Polly Mertens: You know, the broader and the hindsight can get better as time grows, but I think in honoring that, so something happened.
• 42:04
  Polly Mertens: So what?
• 42:08
  Samantha Pruitt: So now, what.
• 42:09
  Samantha Pruitt: So now, what Now?
• 42:10
  Polly Mertens: what Beautiful humans.
• 42:12
  Samantha Pruitt: It's such an exciting time, yeah, for all of us.
• 42:15
  Polly Mertens: Door's opening, man, Door's opening.
• 42:17
  Polly Mertens: Door closes, door opens.
• 42:19
  Polly Mertens: You just got to find it.
• 42:20
  Polly Mertens: You're like, oh well, that one's closed Universe then pours a vacuum.
• 42:23
  Polly Mertens: Okay, where am I to take my beautiful self?
• 42:25
  Polly Mertens: Next?
• 42:26
  Samantha Pruitt: Pick the most colorful door you can find next, please.
• 42:30
  Samantha Pruitt: Amen and you say yours would be rainbows and sparkles you know, just at least a pop of color, please.
• 42:36
  Samantha Pruitt: Yeah, yeah.
• 42:37
  Polly Mertens: No, compromise no compromise.
• 42:40
  Polly Mertens: All right, my beautiful sister.
• 42:42
  Polly Mertens: Yeah, let's remind them our beautiful closing.
• 42:45
  Polly Mertens: What do we want to tell them today?
• 42:47
  Samantha Pruitt: Well, this one this is how your life feels is more important than how it looks.
• 42:53
  Samantha Pruitt: Ba-bam.
• 42:55
  Polly Mertens: Boom, and every day is your opportunity to find your awesome.