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🟡 Alice's Adventures in Wonderland (Alternative Reading) (Full Audiobook) | Lewis Carroll · Fantasy Audiobooks

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  Speaker 1: CHAPTER I. ALICE'S ADVENTURES IN WONDERLAND. This is a LibriVox recording.
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  Speaker 1: All LibriVox recordings are in the public domain. For more information,
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  Speaker 1: or to volunteer, please visit LibriVox.org. Recording by Eric Leach.
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  Speaker 1: Alice's Adventures in Wonderland by Lewis Carroll.
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  Speaker 2: Proem.
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  Speaker 1: Tis two score years since Carroll's art with topsy-turvy magic
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  Speaker 1: sent Alice wondering through a part half comic and half tragic.
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  Speaker 1: Enchanting Alice, black and white, has made your deeds perennial,
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  Speaker 1: And not save chaos and old night can part you
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  Speaker 1: now from Tenniel. But still you are a type, and
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  Speaker 1: based in truth like Lear and Hamlet, And types may
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  Speaker 1: be redraped to taste in cloth of gold or camlet.
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  Speaker 1: Here comes a fresh costumier then, that taste may gain
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  Speaker 1: a wrinkle, From him who drew with such deft pen
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  Speaker 1: the rags of Rip Van Winkle. Austin Dobson All in
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  Speaker 1: the golden afternoon full leisurely we glide, For both our oars,
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  Speaker 1: with little skill by little arms, are plied, While little
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  Speaker 1: hands make vain pretense our wanderings to guide. Ah, cruel three,
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  Speaker 1: in such an hour, beneath such dreamy weather, To beg
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  Speaker 1: a tail of breath too weak to stir the tiniest feather!
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  Speaker 1: Yet what can one poor voice avail against three tongues together?
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  Speaker 1: Imperious Prima flashes forth her edict to begin it, In
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  Speaker 1: gentler tone Secunda hopes there will be nonsense in it,
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  Speaker 1: While Tertia interrupts the tale not more than once a minute.
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  Speaker 1: Anon to sudden silence won, in fancy they pursue, The
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  Speaker 1: dream-child moving through a land of wonders wild and new,
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  Speaker 1: In friendly chat with bird or beast, and half believe
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  Speaker 1: it true. And ever as the story drained the wells
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  Speaker 1: of fancy dry, And faintly strove that weary one to
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  Speaker 1: put the subject by, The rest next time, it is
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  Speaker 1: next time, the happy voices cry. Thus grew the tale
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  Speaker 1: of Wonderland, thus slowly, one by one, Its quaint events
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  Speaker 1: were hammered out, and now the tale is done, and
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  Speaker 1: home we steer a merry crew beneath the setting sun. Alice,
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  Speaker 1: a childish story take, and with a gentle hand, lay
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  Speaker 1: it where childhood's dreams are twined in memory's mystic band,
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  Speaker 1: like pilgrim's withered wreath of flowers plucked in a far-off land.
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  Speaker 1: CHAPTER I. DOWN THE RABBIT HOLE Alice was beginning to
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  Speaker 1: get very tired of sitting by her sister on the
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  Speaker 1: bank and of having nothing to do. Once or twice
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  Speaker 1: she had peeped into the book her sister was reading,
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  Speaker 1: but it had no pictures or conversations in it. And
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  Speaker 1: what is the use of a book, thought Alice, without
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  Speaker 1: pictures or conversations? So she was considering in her own mind,
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  Speaker 1: as well as she could, for the hot day made
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  Speaker 1: her feel very sleepy and stupid, whether the pleasure of
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  Speaker 1: making a daisy chain would be worth the trouble of
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  Speaker 1: getting up and picking the daisies, when suddenly a white
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  Speaker 1: rabbit with pink eyes ran close by her. There was
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  Speaker 1: nothing so very remarkable in that, nor did Alice think
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  Speaker 1: it so very much out of the way to hear
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  Speaker 1: the rabbit say to itself, Oh dear, oh dear, I
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  Speaker 1: shall be too late. When she thought it over afterwards,
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  Speaker 1: it occurred to her that she ought to have wondered
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  Speaker 1: at this, but at the time it all seemed quite natural.
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  Speaker 1: But when the rabbit actually took a watch out of
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  Speaker 1: its waistcoat pocket and looked at it and then hurried on,
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  Speaker 1: Alice started to her feet, for it flashed across her
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  Speaker 1: mind that she had never before seen a rabbit with
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  Speaker 1: either a waistcoat pocket or a watch to take out
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  Speaker 1: of it. and burning with curiosity she ran across the
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  Speaker 1: field after it, and was just in time to see
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  Speaker 1: it pop down a large rabbit hole under the hedge.
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  Speaker 1: In another moment down went Alice after it, never once
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  Speaker 1: considering how in the world she was to get out again.
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  Speaker 1: The rabbit hole went straight on like a tunnel for
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  Speaker 1: some way, and then dipped suddenly down, so suddenly that
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  Speaker 1: Alice had not a moment to think about stopping herself
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  Speaker 1: before she found herself falling down what seemed to be
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  Speaker 1: a very deep well. Either the well was very deep
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  Speaker 1: or she fell very slowly, for she had plenty of
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  Speaker 1: time as she went down to look about her, and
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  Speaker 1: to wonder what was going to happen next. First, she
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  Speaker 1: tried to look down and make out what she was
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  Speaker 1: coming to, but it was too dark to see anything.
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  Speaker 1: Then she looked at the sides of the well and
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  Speaker 1: noticed that they were filled with cupboards and bookshelves. Here
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  Speaker 1: and there she saw maps and pictures hung upon pegs.
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  Speaker 1: She took down a jar from one of the shelves
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  Speaker 1: as she passed it. It was labeled Orange Marmalade, but
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  Speaker 1: to her disappointment it was empty. She did not like
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  Speaker 1: to drop the jar for fear of killing somebody underneath,
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  Speaker 1: so managed to put it into one of the cupboards
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  Speaker 1: as she fell past it. Well, thought Alice to herself,
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  Speaker 1: after such a fall as this I shall think nothing
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  Speaker 1: of tumbling downstairs. How brave they'll all think of me
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  Speaker 1: at home. Why, I wouldn't say anything about it even
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  Speaker 1: if I fell off the top of the house, which
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  Speaker 1: was very likely true. Down, down, down. Would the fall
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  Speaker 1: never come to an end? I wonder how many miles
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  Speaker 1: I've fallen by this time, she said aloud. I must
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  Speaker 1: be getting somewhere near the center of the earth. Let
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  Speaker 1: me see, that would be four thousand miles down, I think. For,
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  Speaker 1: you see, Alice had learned several things of this sort
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  Speaker 1: in her lessons in the schoolroom, and though this was
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  Speaker 1: not a very good opportunity for showing off her knowledge,
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  Speaker 1: as there was no one to listen to her, still
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  Speaker 1: it was good practice to say it over. Yes, that's
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  Speaker 1: about the right distance, but then I wonder what latitude
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  Speaker 1: or longitude I've got to. Alice had no idea what
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  Speaker 1: latitude was, or longitude either, but thought they were nice
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  Speaker 1: grand words to say. Presently she began again. I wonder
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  Speaker 1: if I shall fall right through the earth. How funny
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  Speaker 1: it'll seem to come out among the people that walk
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  Speaker 1: with their heads downwards. The antipathies, I think. She was
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  Speaker 1: rather glad there was no one listening this time, as
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  Speaker 1: it didn't sound at all the right word. But I
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  Speaker 1: shall have to ask them what the name of the
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  Speaker 1: country is, you know. Please, ma'am, is this New Zealand
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  Speaker 1: or Australia? And she tried to curtsy as she spoke,
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  Speaker 1: fancy curtsying as you're falling through the air. Do you
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  Speaker 1: think you could manage it? and what an ignorant little
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  Speaker 1: girl she'll think me. No, it'll never do to ask.
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  Speaker 1: Perhaps I shall see it written up somewhere. Down, down, down.
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  Speaker 1: There was nothing else to do, so Alice soon began
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  Speaker 1: talking again. Dinah will miss me very much to-night, I
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  Speaker 1: should think. Dinah was the cat. I hope they'll remember
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  Speaker 1: her saucer of milk at tea-time. Dinah, my dear, I
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  Speaker 1: wish you were here down with me. There are no
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  Speaker 1: mice in the air, I'm afraid, but you might catch
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  Speaker 1: a bat, and that's very like a mouse, you know.
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  Speaker 1: But do cats eat bats, I wonder? And here Alice
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  Speaker 1: began to get rather sleepy, and went on saying to herself,
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  Speaker 1: in a dreamy sort of way, Do cats eat bats?
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  Speaker 1: Do cats eat bats? And sometimes, Do bats eat cats?
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  Speaker 1: For you see, as she couldn't answer either question, it
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  Speaker 1: didn't much matter which way she put it. She felt
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  Speaker 1: that she was dozing off, and had just begun to
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  Speaker 1: dream that she was walking hand in hand with Dinah,
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  Speaker 1: and saying to her very earnestly, Now, Dinah, tell me
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  Speaker 1: the truth. Did you ever eat a bat? When suddenly, Thump! Thump!
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  Speaker 1: Down she came upon a heap of sticks and dry leaves,
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  Speaker 1: and the fall was over. Alice was not a bit hurt,
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  Speaker 1: and she jumped up onto her feet in a moment.
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  Speaker 1: She looked up, but it was all dark overhead. Before
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  Speaker 1: her was another long passage, and the white rabbit was
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  Speaker 1: still in sight, hurrying down it. There was not a
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  Speaker 1: moment to be lost. Away went Alice like the wind,
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  Speaker 1: and was just in time to hear it say, as
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  Speaker 1: it turned a corner, Oh, my ears and whiskers, how
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  Speaker 1: late it's getting! She was close behind it when she
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  Speaker 1: turned the corner, but the rabbit was no longer to
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  Speaker 1: be seen. She found herself in a long, low hall
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  Speaker 1: which was lit up by a row of lamps hanging
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  Speaker 1: from the roof. There were doors all around the hall,
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  Speaker 1: but they were all locked, and when Alice had been
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  Speaker 1: all the way down one side and up the other,
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  Speaker 1: trying every door, she walked sadly down the middle, wondering
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  Speaker 1: how she was ever to get out again. Suddenly she
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  Speaker 1: came upon a little three-legged table, all made of solid glass.
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  Speaker 1: There was nothing on it but a tiny golden key,
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  Speaker 1: and Alice's first idea was that this might belong to
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  Speaker 1: one of the doors of the hall. but alas, either
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  Speaker 1: the locks were too large or the key was too small,
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  Speaker 1: but at any rate it would not open any of them. However,
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  Speaker 1: on the second time around, she came upon a low
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  Speaker 1: curtain she had not noticed before, and behind it was
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  Speaker 1: a little door about fifteen inches high. She tried the
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  Speaker 1: little golden key in the lock, and to her great
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  Speaker 1: delight it fitted. Alice opened the door and found that
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  Speaker 1: it led into a small passage, not much larger than
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  Speaker 1: a rat hole. She knelt down and looked along the
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  Speaker 1: passage into the loveliest garden you ever saw. how she
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  Speaker 1: longed to get out of that dark hall and wander
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  Speaker 1: about among those beds of bright flowers and those cool fountains.
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  Speaker 1: But she could not even get her head through the doorway.' Molly,
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  Speaker 1: even if my head would go through,' thought poor Alice,'
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  Speaker 1: it would be of very little use without my shoulders. Oh,
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  Speaker 1: how I wish I could shut up like a telescope!
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  Speaker 1: I think I could, if I only knew how to begin.
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  Speaker 1: For you see, so many out-of-the-way things had happened lately
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  Speaker 1: that Alice had begun to think that very few things
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  Speaker 1: indeed were really impossible.' There seemed to be no use
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  Speaker 1: in waiting by the little door, so she went back
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  Speaker 1: to the table, half hoping she might find another key
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  Speaker 1: on it, or at any rate a book of rules
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  Speaker 1: for shutting people up like telescopes. This time she found
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  Speaker 1: a little bottle on it, which certainly was not here before,
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  Speaker 1: said Alice, and tied round the neck of the bottle
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  Speaker 1: was a paper label with the words DRINK ME beautifully
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  Speaker 1: printed on it in large letters. It was all very
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  Speaker 1: well to say DRINK ME, but the wise little Alice
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  Speaker 1: was not going to do that in a hurry. No,
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  Speaker 1: I'll look first, she said. and see whether it's marked
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  Speaker 1: poison or not. For she had read several nice little
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  Speaker 1: stories about children who had got burnt and eaten up
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  Speaker 1: by wild beasts and other unpleasant things, all because they
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  Speaker 1: would not remember the simple rules their friends had taught them,
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  Speaker 1: such as that a red hot poker will burn you
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  Speaker 1: if you hold it too long, and that if you
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  Speaker 1: cut your finger very deeply with a knife it usually bleeds.
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  Speaker 1: And she had never forgotten that if you drink much
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  Speaker 1: from a bottle marked poison, it is almost certain to
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  Speaker 1: disagree with you sooner or later. However, this bottle was
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  Speaker 1: not marked poison, so Alice ventured to taste it, and
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  Speaker 1: finding it very nice, it had in fact a sort
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  Speaker 1: of mixed flavor of cherry tart, custard, pineapple, roast turkey, coffee,
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  Speaker 1: and hot buttered toast, she very soon finished it off.
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  Speaker 1: What a curious feeling, said Alice, I must be shutting
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  Speaker 1: up like a telescope. And so it was indeed. She
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  Speaker 1: was now only ten inches high, and her face brightened
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  Speaker 1: up with the thought that she was now the right
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  Speaker 1: size for going through that little door into that lovely garden. First, however,
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  Speaker 1: she waited for a few minutes to see if she
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  Speaker 1: was going to shrink any further. She felt a little
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  Speaker 1: nervous about this. For it might end, you know, said
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  Speaker 1: Alice to herself, in my going out altogether like a candle.
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  Speaker 1: I wonder what I should be like then. And she
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  Speaker 1: tried to fancy what the flame of a candle looks
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  Speaker 1: like after the candle is blown out, for she could
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  Speaker 1: not remember ever having seen such a thing. After a while,
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  Speaker 1: finding that nothing more happened, she decided on going into
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  Speaker 1: the garden at once. But alas for poor Alice! When
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  Speaker 1: she got to the door, she found she had forgotten
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  Speaker 1: the little golden key, and when she went back to
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  Speaker 1: the table for it, she found she could not possibly
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  Speaker 1: reach it. She could see it quite plainly through the glass,
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  Speaker 1: and she tried her best to climb up one of
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  Speaker 1: the legs of the table, but it was too slippery.
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  Speaker 1: And when she had tired herself out with trying, the
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  Speaker 1: poor little thing sat down and cried.' Come, there's no
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  Speaker 1: use in crying like that,' said Alice to herself rather sharply.'
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  Speaker 1: I advise you to leave off this minute. She generally
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  Speaker 1: gave herself very good advice, though she very seldom followed it.
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  Speaker 1: And sometimes she scolded herself so severely as to bring
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  Speaker 1: tears into her eyes. And once she remembered trying to
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  Speaker 1: box her own ears for having cheated herself in a
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  Speaker 1: game of croquet she was playing against herself, for this
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  Speaker 1: curious child was very fond of pretending to be two people.
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  Speaker 1: But it's no use now, thought poor Alice, to pretend
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  Speaker 1: to be two people, where there's hardly enough of me
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  Speaker 1: left to make one respectable person. Soon her eye fell
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  Speaker 1: on a little glass box that was lying under the table.
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  Speaker 1: She opened it and found in it a very small cake,
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  Speaker 1: on which the words EAT ME were beautifully marked in currants. Well,
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  Speaker 1: I'll eat it, said Alice, and if it makes me
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  Speaker 1: grow larger I can reach the key, and if it
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  Speaker 1: makes me grow smaller I can creep under the door.
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  Speaker 1: So either way I'll get into the garden and I
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  Speaker 1: don't care which happens. She ate a little bit and
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  Speaker 1: said anxiously to herself, Which way, which way? holding her
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  Speaker 1: hand on the top of her head to feel which
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  Speaker 1: way it was growing, and she was quite surprised to
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  Speaker 1: find that she remained the same size. To be sure,
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  Speaker 1: this is what generally happens when one eats cake, but
• 11:50
  Speaker 1: Alice had got so much into the way of expecting
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  Speaker 1: nothing but out-of-the-way things to happen that it seemed quite
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  Speaker 1: dull and stupid for life to go on in the
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  Speaker 1: common way. So she set to work, and very soon
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  Speaker 1: finished off the cake. End of chapter 1 CHAPTER II
• 12:09
  Speaker 1: OF ALICE'S ADVENTURES IN WONDERLAND by Lewis Carroll. This LibriVox
• 12:13
  Speaker 1: recording is in the public domain. THE POOL OF TEARS
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  Speaker 1: Curiouser and curiouser, cried Alice. She was so much surprised
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  Speaker 1: that for a moment she quite forgot how to speak
• 12:24
  Speaker 1: good English. Now I'm opening out like the largest telescope
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  Speaker 1: that ever was. Good-bye, feet! For when she looked down
• 12:31
  Speaker 1: at her feet they seemed to be almost out of sight.
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  Speaker 1: They were getting so far off. Oh, my poor little feet!
• 12:38
  Speaker 1: I wonder who will put on your shoes and stockings
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  Speaker 1: for you now, dears. I'm sure I shan't be able.
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  Speaker 1: I shall be a great deal too far off to
• 12:45
  Speaker 1: trouble myself about you. You must manage the best way
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  Speaker 1: you can. But I must be kind to them, thought Alice,
• 12:51
  Speaker 1: or perhaps they won't walk the way I want to go.
• 12:53
  Speaker 1: Let me see. I'll give them a new pair of
• 12:55
  Speaker 1: boots every Christmas. And she went on planning to herself
• 12:58
  Speaker 1: how she would manage it. They must go by the carrier,
• 13:01
  Speaker 1: she thought, and how funny it'll seem sending presents to
• 13:04
  Speaker 1: one's own feet, and how odd the directions will look.
• 13:07
  Speaker 1: Alice's right foot, Esquire, hearth-rug, near the fender, with Alice's love. Oh, dear,
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  Speaker 1: what nonsense I'm talking! Just then her head struck against
• 13:17
  Speaker 1: the roof of the hall. In fact, she was now
• 13:20
  Speaker 1: rather more than nine feet high, and she at once
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  Speaker 1: took up the little golden key and hurried off to
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  Speaker 1: the garden door.
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  Speaker 2: Poor Alice!
• 13:27
  Speaker 1: It was as much as she could do, lying down
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  Speaker 1: on one side to look through into the garden with
• 13:31
  Speaker 1: one eye, but to get through was more hopeless than ever,
• 13:34
  Speaker 1: and she sat down and began to cry again. You
• 13:37
  Speaker 1: ought to be ashamed of yourself, said Alice. A great
• 13:40
  Speaker 1: girl like you, she might as well say this, to
• 13:43
  Speaker 1: go on crying in this way. Stop this moment, I
• 13:45
  Speaker 1: tell you. But she went on all the same, shedding
• 13:48
  Speaker 1: gallons of tears, until there was a large pool all
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  Speaker 1: round her, about four inches deep and reaching half down
• 13:54
  Speaker 1: the hall. After a time she heard a little pattering
• 13:57
  Speaker 1: of feet in the distance, and she hastily dried her
• 13:59
  Speaker 1: eyes to see what was coming. It was the white
• 14:02
  Speaker 1: rabbit returning, splendidly dressed, with a pair of white kid
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  Speaker 1: gloves in one hand and a large fan in the other.
• 14:07
  Speaker 1: He came trotting along in a great hurry, muttering to
• 14:10
  Speaker 1: himself as he came,' Oh, the Duchess, the Duchess! Won't
• 14:13
  Speaker 1: she be savage if I've kept her waiting?' Alice felt
• 14:17
  Speaker 1: so desperate that she was ready to ask help of anyone,
• 14:20
  Speaker 1: so when the rabbit came near her she began in
• 14:22
  Speaker 1: a low, timid voice,' If you please, sir.' The rabbit
• 14:25
  Speaker 1: started violently, dropping the white kid gloves in the fan,
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  Speaker 1: and scurried away into the darkness as hard as he
• 14:30
  Speaker 1: could go. Alice took up the fan and gloves, and
• 14:33
  Speaker 1: as the hall was very hot she kept fanning herself
• 14:35
  Speaker 1: all the time she went on talking. Dear, dear, how
• 14:38
  Speaker 1: queer everything is today, and yesterday things went on just
• 14:41
  Speaker 1: as usual. I wonder if I've been changed during the night.
• 14:44
  Speaker 1: Let me think. Was I the same when I got
• 14:47
  Speaker 1: up this morning? I almost think I can remember feeling
• 14:50
  Speaker 1: a little different, but if I'm not the same, the
• 14:52
  Speaker 1: next question is, who in the world am I? Ah,
• 14:55
  Speaker 1: that's a great puzzle. And she began thinking over all
• 14:58
  Speaker 1: the children she knew that were of the same age
• 15:00
  Speaker 1: as herself, to see if she could have been changed
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  Speaker 1: for any of them. I'm sure I'm not Ada, she said,
• 15:05
  Speaker 1: for her hair goes in such long ringlets, and mine
• 15:07
  Speaker 1: doesn't go in ringlets at all. And I'm sure I
• 15:09
  Speaker 1: can't be Mabel, for I know all sorts of things,
• 15:12
  Speaker 1: and she, oh, she knows such very little. Besides, she's she,
• 15:16
  Speaker 1: and I'm I. And oh dear, how puzzling it all is.
• 15:20
  Speaker 1: I'll try if I know all the things I used
• 15:22
  Speaker 1: to know. Let me see. Four times five is twelve,
• 15:25
  Speaker 1: and four times six is thirteen, and four times seven is,
• 15:29
  Speaker 1: oh dear, I shall never get to twenty at that rate. However,
• 15:32
  Speaker 1: the multiplication table doesn't signify. Let's try geography. London is
• 15:37
  Speaker 1: the capital of Paris, and Paris is the capital of Rome,
• 15:41
  Speaker 1: and Rome... No, that's all wrong, I'm certain. I must
• 15:44
  Speaker 1: have been changed from Mabel. I'll try and say how
• 15:46
  Speaker 1: doth the little. And she crossed her hands on her
• 15:49
  Speaker 1: lap as if she were saying lessons, and began to
• 15:51
  Speaker 1: repeat it, but her voice sounded hoarse and strange, and
• 15:54
  Speaker 1: the words did not come the same as they used
• 15:56
  Speaker 1: to do. How doth the little crocodile improve his shining tail?
• 16:01
  Speaker 1: and pour the waters of the Nile on every golden scale.
• 16:05
  Speaker 1: How cheerfully he seems to grin, how neatly spreads his claws,
• 16:09
  Speaker 1: and welcomes little fishes in with gently smiling jaws. I'm
• 16:14
  Speaker 1: sure those are not the right words, said poor Alice,
• 16:16
  Speaker 1: and her eyes filled with tears again as she went on.
• 16:19
  Speaker 1: I must be Mabel after all, and I shall have
• 16:22
  Speaker 1: to go and live in that pokey little house, and
• 16:24
  Speaker 1: have next to no toys to play with, and oh,
• 16:26
  Speaker 1: ever so many lessons to learn. No, I've made up
• 16:30
  Speaker 1: my mind about it. If I'm able, I'll stay down here.
• 16:33
  Speaker 1: It'll be no use their putting their heads down and saying,
• 16:36
  Speaker 1: Come up again, dear. I shall only look up and say,
• 16:38
  Speaker 1: Who am I then? Tell me that first, and then
• 16:40
  Speaker 1: if I like being that person, I'll come up. If not,
• 16:42
  Speaker 1: I'll stay down here till I'm someone else. But oh dear,
• 16:45
  Speaker 1: cried Alice with a sudden burst of tears, I do
• 16:48
  Speaker 1: wish they would put their heads down. I'm so very
• 16:51
  Speaker 1: tired of being all alone here. As she said this,
• 16:54
  Speaker 1: she looked down at her hands and was surprised to
• 16:56
  Speaker 1: see that she had put on one of the rabbit's
• 16:58
  Speaker 1: little white kid gloves while she was talking. How can
• 17:01
  Speaker 1: I have done that, she thought. I must be growing
• 17:03
  Speaker 1: small again. She got up and went to the table
• 17:06
  Speaker 1: to measure herself by it and found that, as nearly
• 17:08
  Speaker 1: as she could guess, she was now about two feet
• 17:11
  Speaker 1: high and was going on shrinking rapidly. She soon found
• 17:14
  Speaker 1: out that the cause of this was the fan she
• 17:15
  Speaker 1: was holding, and she dropped it hastily just in time
• 17:18
  Speaker 1: to avoid shrinking away altogether. That was a narrow escape,
• 17:22
  Speaker 1: said Alice. a good deal frightened at the sudden change,
• 17:24
  Speaker 1: but very glad to find herself still in existence. And
• 17:27
  Speaker 1: now for the garden, and she ran with all speed
• 17:30
  Speaker 1: back to the little door. But alas, the little door
• 17:32
  Speaker 1: was shut again, and the little golden key was lying
• 17:35
  Speaker 1: on the glass table as before. And things are worse
• 17:38
  Speaker 1: than ever, thought the poor child, for I never was
• 17:40
  Speaker 1: so small as this before, never, and I declare it's
• 17:43
  Speaker 1: too bad that it is. As she said these words,
• 17:47
  Speaker 1: her foot slipped, and in another moment, splash, she was
• 17:50
  Speaker 1: up to her chin in salt water. Her first idea
• 17:52
  Speaker 1: was that she had somehow fallen into the sea, and
• 17:55
  Speaker 1: in that case, I can go back by railway, she
• 17:57
  Speaker 1: said to herself. Alice had been to the seaside once
• 18:00
  Speaker 1: in her life, and had come to the general conclusion
• 18:02
  Speaker 1: that wherever you go to on the English coast, you
• 18:05
  Speaker 1: find a number of bathing machines in the sea, some
• 18:07
  Speaker 1: children digging in the sand with wooden spades, then a
• 18:09
  Speaker 1: row of lodging houses, and behind them a railway station. However,
• 18:13
  Speaker 1: she soon made out that she was in the pool
• 18:15
  Speaker 1: of tears, which she had wept when she was nine
• 18:17
  Speaker 1: feet high. I wish I hadn't cried so much, said
• 18:20
  Speaker 1: Alice as she swam about trying to find her way out.
• 18:24
  Speaker 1: I shall be punished for it now, I suppose, by
• 18:26
  Speaker 1: being drowned in my own tears. That will be a
• 18:28
  Speaker 1: queer thing to be sure. However, everything is queer today.
• 18:33
  Speaker 1: Just then she heard something splashing about in the pool
• 18:35
  Speaker 1: a little way off, and she swam nearer to make
• 18:38
  Speaker 1: out what it was. At first she thought it must
• 18:40
  Speaker 1: be a walrus or hippopotamus, but then she remembered how
• 18:43
  Speaker 1: small she was now, and soon she made out that
• 18:45
  Speaker 1: it was only a mouse that had slipped in like herself.
• 18:49
  Speaker 1: Would it be of any use now, thought Alice, to
• 18:51
  Speaker 1: speak to this mouse? Everything is so out of the
• 18:54
  Speaker 1: way down here that I should think very likely that
• 18:56
  Speaker 1: it can talk. At any rate, there's no harm in trying.
• 18:59
  Speaker 1: So she began. O mouse, do you know the way
• 19:02
  Speaker 1: out of this pool? I am very tired of swimming
• 19:05
  Speaker 1: about here.
• 19:05
  Speaker 2: O mouse!
• 19:07
  Speaker 1: Alice thought this must be the right way of speaking
• 19:09
  Speaker 1: to a mouse. She had never done such a thing before,
• 19:12
  Speaker 1: but she remembered having seen in her brother's Latin grammar,
• 19:15
  Speaker 1: a mouse, of a mouse, to a mouse. A mouse!
• 19:19
  Speaker 1: O mouse! The mouse looked at her rather inquisitively, and
• 19:23
  Speaker 1: seemed to her to wink with one of its little eyes,
• 19:25
  Speaker 1: but it said nothing. Perhaps it doesn't understand English, thought Alice.
• 19:30
  Speaker 1: I dare say it's a French mouse come over with
• 19:32
  Speaker 1: William the Conqueror, for with all her knowledge of history,
• 19:35
  Speaker 1: Alice had no very clear notion how long ago anything
• 19:37
  Speaker 1: had happened. So she began again. Which was the first
• 19:42
  Speaker 1: sentence in her French lesson book. The mouse gave a
• 19:45
  Speaker 1: sudden leap out of the water, and seemed to quiver
• 19:47
  Speaker 1: all over with fright. Oh, I beg your pardon. cried
• 19:50
  Speaker 1: Alice hastily, afraid that she had hurt the poor animal's feelings.
• 19:53
  Speaker 1: I quite forgot you didn't like cats. Not like cats,
• 19:57
  Speaker 1: cried the mouse in a shrill, passionate voice. Would you
• 20:00
  Speaker 1: like cats if you were me? Well, perhaps not, said
• 20:03
  Speaker 1: Alice in a soothing tone. Don't be angry about it,
• 20:05
  Speaker 1: and yet I wish I could show you our cat Dinah.
• 20:08
  Speaker 1: I think you'd take a fancy to cats if you
• 20:10
  Speaker 1: could only see her. She's such a dear, quiet thing.
• 20:13
  Speaker 1: Alice went on half to herself as she swam lazily
• 20:16
  Speaker 1: about in the pool. And she sits purring so nicely
• 20:18
  Speaker 1: by the fire, licking her paws and washing her face.
• 20:21
  Speaker 1: And she's such a nice, soft thing to nurse. And
• 20:24
  Speaker 1: she's such a capital one for catching mice. Oh, I
• 20:26
  Speaker 1: beg your pardon, cried Alice again, for this time the
• 20:29
  Speaker 1: mouse was bristling all over, and she felt certain it
• 20:31
  Speaker 1: must be really offended. We won't talk about her any
• 20:34
  Speaker 1: more if you'd rather not. We indeed, cried the mouse,
• 20:37
  Speaker 1: who was trembling down to the end of his tail.
• 20:40
  Speaker 1: As if I would talk on such a subject. Our
• 20:43
  Speaker 1: family has always hated cats. Nasty, low, vulgar things. Don't
• 20:47
  Speaker 1: let me hear the name again. I won't indeed, said Alice,
• 20:51
  Speaker 1: in a great hurry to change the subject of conversation.
• 20:54
  Speaker 1: Are you fond of dogs? The mouse did not answer,
• 20:57
  Speaker 1: so Alice went on eagerly. There's such a nice little
• 21:01
  Speaker 1: dog near our house I should like to show you.
• 21:03
  Speaker 1: A little bright-eyed terrier, you know, with, oh, such long
• 21:06
  Speaker 1: curly brown hair, and it'll fetch things when you throw them,
• 21:09
  Speaker 1: and it'll sit up and beg for its dinner, and
• 21:11
  Speaker 1: all sorts of things. I can't remember half of them.
• 21:14
  Speaker 1: And it belongs to a farmer, you know, and he
• 21:16
  Speaker 1: says it's so useful, it's worth a hundred pounds. He
• 21:19
  Speaker 1: says it kills all the rats, and, oh, dear, cried
• 21:22
  Speaker 1: Alice in a sorrowful tone, I'm afraid I've offended it again.
• 21:26
  Speaker 1: For the mouse was swimming away from her as hard
• 21:28
  Speaker 1: as it could go, and making quite a commotion in
• 21:30
  Speaker 1: the pool as it went. So she called softly after it, Mouse, dear,
• 21:34
  Speaker 1: do come back again, and we won't talk about cats
• 21:37
  Speaker 1: or dogs either if you don't like them. When the
• 21:39
  Speaker 1: mouse heard this, it turned round and swam slowly back
• 21:42
  Speaker 1: to her. Its face was quite pale, with passion, Alice thought,
• 21:45
  Speaker 1: and it said in a low, trembling voice, Let us
• 21:48
  Speaker 1: get to the shore, and then I'll tell you my history,
• 21:51
  Speaker 1: and you'll understand why it is I hate cats and dogs.
• 21:54
  Speaker 1: It was high time to go, for the pool was
• 21:56
  Speaker 1: getting quite crowded with the birds and animals that had
• 21:58
  Speaker 1: fallen into it, There were a duck and a dodo,
• 22:01
  Speaker 1: a lorry and an eaglet, and several other curious creatures.
• 22:04
  Speaker 1: Alice led the way, and the whole party swam to
• 22:06
  Speaker 1: the shore. A CAUCUS RACE AND A LONG TALE They
• 22:27
  Speaker 1: were indeed a queer-looking party that assembled on the bank,
• 22:31
  Speaker 1: the birds with draggled feathers, the animals with their fur
• 22:34
  Speaker 1: clinging close to them, and all dripping wet, cross, and uncomfortable.
• 22:39
  Speaker 1: The first question, of course, was how to get dry again.
• 22:42
  Speaker 1: They had a consultation about this, and after a few
• 22:45
  Speaker 1: minutes it seemed quite natural to Alice to find herself
• 22:48
  Speaker 1: talking familiarly with them, as if she had known them
• 22:51
  Speaker 1: all her life. Indeed, she had quite a long argument
• 22:54
  Speaker 1: with the lorry, who at last turned sulky and would
• 22:56
  Speaker 1: only say, I'm older than you, and must know better.
• 23:00
  Speaker 1: And this Alice would not allow without knowing how old
• 23:03
  Speaker 1: it was, and as the lorry positively refused to tell
• 23:06
  Speaker 1: its age, there was no more to be said. At
• 23:09
  Speaker 1: last the mouse, who seemed to be a person of
• 23:11
  Speaker 1: authority among them, called out, Sit down, all of you,
• 23:14
  Speaker 1: and listen to me. I'll soon make you dry enough.
• 23:18
  Speaker 1: They all sat down at once, in a large ring,
• 23:20
  Speaker 1: with the mouse in the middle. Alice kept her eyes
• 23:23
  Speaker 1: anxiously fixed on it, for she felt sure she would
• 23:25
  Speaker 1: catch a bad cold if she did not get dry
• 23:27
  Speaker 1: very soon. Ahem, said the mouse with an important air.
• 23:32
  Speaker 1: Are you all ready? This is the driest thing I know.
• 23:36
  Speaker 1: Silence all round, if you please. William the Conqueror, whose
• 23:41
  Speaker 1: cause was favored by the Pope, was soon submitted to
• 23:44
  Speaker 1: by the English, who wanted leaders, and had been of
• 23:47
  Speaker 1: late much accustomed to usurpation and conquest. Edwin and Morcar,
• 23:52
  Speaker 1: the earls of Mercia and Northumbria. Ah, said the lorry
• 23:56
  Speaker 1: with a shiver. I beg your pardon, said the mouse,
• 24:00
  Speaker 1: frowning but very politely. Did you speak? Not I, said
• 24:04
  Speaker 1: the lorry hastily. I thought you did, said the mouse.
• 24:09
  Speaker 1: I proceed. Edwin and Morcar, the earls of Mercia and Northumbria,
• 24:14
  Speaker 1: declared for him, and even Stagand, the patriotic archbishop of Canterbury,
• 24:18
  Speaker 1: found it advisable— Found what? said the duck. Found it,
• 24:23
  Speaker 1: the mouse replied rather crossly. Of course you know what
• 24:25
  Speaker 1: it means. I know what it means well enough when
• 24:29
  Speaker 1: I find a thing, said the duck. It's generally a
• 24:32
  Speaker 1: frog or a worm. The question is, what did the
• 24:35
  Speaker 1: archbishop find? The mouse did not notice this question, but
• 24:39
  Speaker 1: hurriedly went on. Found it advisable to go with Edgar
• 24:43
  Speaker 1: Atheling to meet William and offer him the crown. William's
• 24:47
  Speaker 1: conduct at first was moderate. But the insolence of his Normans...
• 24:51
  Speaker 1: How are you getting on now, my dear? It continued
• 24:54
  Speaker 1: turning to Alice as it spoke. As wet as ever,
• 24:58
  Speaker 1: said Alice in a melancholy tone, doesn't seem to dry
• 25:01
  Speaker 1: me at all. In that case, said the dodo solemnly,
• 25:06
  Speaker 1: rising to its feet, I move that the meeting adjourn
• 25:09
  Speaker 1: for the immediate adoption of more energetic remedies. Speak English,
• 25:15
  Speaker 1: said the eaglet. I don't know the meaning of half
• 25:19
  Speaker 1: those long words, and what's more, I don't believe you
• 25:21
  Speaker 1: do either. And the eaglet bent down its head to
• 25:25
  Speaker 1: hide a smile. Some of the other birds tittered audibly.
• 25:29
  Speaker 1: What I was going to say, said the dodo in
• 25:32
  Speaker 1: an offended tone, was that the best thing to get
• 25:35
  Speaker 1: us dry would be a caucus race. What is a
• 25:40
  Speaker 1: caucus race, said Alice, not that she much wanted to know,
• 25:43
  Speaker 1: but the dodo had paused as if it thought that
• 25:45
  Speaker 1: somebody ought to speak. and no one else seemed inclined
• 25:48
  Speaker 1: to say anything.' Why,' said the dodo,' the best way
• 25:53
  Speaker 1: to explain it is to do it. And as you
• 25:55
  Speaker 1: might like to try the thing yourself some winter day,
• 25:58
  Speaker 1: I will tell you how the dodo managed it. First
• 26:01
  Speaker 1: it marked out a race course in a sort of circle.'
• 26:04
  Speaker 1: The exact shape doesn't matter,' it said. And then all
• 26:08
  Speaker 1: the party were placed along the course here and there.
• 26:11
  Speaker 1: There was no one, two, three, and away.' But they
• 26:14
  Speaker 1: began running when they liked, and left off when they liked,
• 26:18
  Speaker 1: so that it was not easy to know when the
• 26:19
  Speaker 1: race was over. However, when they had been running half
• 26:23
  Speaker 1: an hour or so, and were quite dry again, the
• 26:26
  Speaker 1: dodo suddenly called, The race is over! And they all
• 26:30
  Speaker 1: crowded round it, panting and asking, But who has won?
• 26:34
  Speaker 1: This question the dodo could not answer without a great
• 26:36
  Speaker 1: deal of thought, and it stood for a long time
• 26:39
  Speaker 1: with one finger pressed upon its forehead. the position in
• 26:42
  Speaker 1: which you usually see Shakespeare in the pictures of him,
• 26:45
  Speaker 1: while the rest waited in silence. At last the dodo said,
• 26:49
  Speaker 1: Everybody has won, and all must have prizes. But who
• 26:54
  Speaker 1: is to give the prizes? quite a chorus of voices asked. Why, she,
• 26:59
  Speaker 1: of course, said the dodo, pointing to Alice with one finger,
• 27:03
  Speaker 1: and the whole party at once crowded round her, calling
• 27:05
  Speaker 1: out in a confused way, Prizes!
• 27:07
  Speaker 2: Prizes!
• 27:08
  Speaker 1: Prizes! Alice had no idea what to do, and in
• 27:12
  Speaker 1: despair she put her hand in her pocket and pulled
• 27:14
  Speaker 1: out a box of confit. Luckily the salt water had
• 27:17
  Speaker 1: not got into it, and handed them round as prizes.
• 27:20
  Speaker 1: There was exactly one piece all round.' But she must
• 27:24
  Speaker 1: have a prize herself, you know,' said the mouse.' Of course,'
• 27:29
  Speaker 1: the dodo replied very gravely.' What else have you got
• 27:33
  Speaker 1: in your pocket?' it went on, turning to Alice.' Only
• 27:36
  Speaker 1: a thimble,' said Alice sadly. Hand it over here, said
• 27:40
  Speaker 1: the dodo. Then they all crowded round her once more,
• 27:44
  Speaker 1: while the dodo solemnly presented the thimble, saying, We beg
• 27:48
  Speaker 1: your acceptance of this elegant thimble. And when it had
• 27:52
  Speaker 1: finished this short speech, they all cheered. Alice thought the
• 27:56
  Speaker 1: whole thing very absurd, but they all looked so grave
• 27:58
  Speaker 1: that she did not dare to laugh, and as she
• 28:01
  Speaker 1: could not think of anything to say, she simply bowed
• 28:04
  Speaker 1: and took the thimble, looking as solemn as she could.
• 28:08
  Speaker 1: The next thing was to eat the comfey. This caused
• 28:11
  Speaker 1: some noise and confusion, as the large birds complained that
• 28:14
  Speaker 1: they could not taste theirs, and the small ones choked
• 28:17
  Speaker 1: and had to be patted on the back. However, it
• 28:19
  Speaker 1: was over at last, and they sat down again in
• 28:22
  Speaker 1: a ring, and begged the mouse to tell them something more.
• 28:26
  Speaker 1: You promised to tell me your history, you know, said Alice.
• 28:29
  Speaker 1: And why it is you hate C and D, she
• 28:32
  Speaker 1: added in a whisper, half afraid that it would be
• 28:35
  Speaker 1: offended again. Mine is a long and sad tale, said
• 28:38
  Speaker 1: the mouse, turning to Alice and sighing. It is a
• 28:41
  Speaker 1: long tale, certainly, said Alice, looking down with wonder at
• 28:44
  Speaker 1: the mouse's tail. But why do you call it sad?
• 28:48
  Speaker 1: And she kept on puzzling about it while the mouse
• 28:50
  Speaker 1: was speaking, so that her idea of the tale was
• 28:53
  Speaker 1: something like this. Fury said to a mouse that he
• 28:58
  Speaker 1: met in the house, Let us both go to law.
• 29:01
  Speaker 1: I will prosecute you.
• 29:04
  Speaker 2: Come, I'll take no.
• 29:05
  Speaker 1: Denial, we must have the trial, for really this morning
• 29:09
  Speaker 1: I've nothing to do. Said the mouse to the cur,
• 29:12
  Speaker 1: such a trial, dear sir, with no jury or judge,
• 29:16
  Speaker 1: would be wasting our breath. I'll be judge, I'll be jury,
• 29:20
  Speaker 1: said cunning old fury, I'll try the whole cause and
• 29:24
  Speaker 1: condemn you to death. You're not attending, said the mouse
• 29:28
  Speaker 1: to Alice severely. What are you thinking of? I beg
• 29:33
  Speaker 1: your pardon, said Alice very humbly. You had got to
• 29:35
  Speaker 1: the fifth bend, I think. I had not, cried the
• 29:38
  Speaker 1: mouse angrily.' A knot?' said Alice, always ready to make
• 29:42
  Speaker 1: herself useful, and looking anxiously about her.' Oh, do let
• 29:46
  Speaker 1: me help to undo it.'' I shall do nothing of
• 29:49
  Speaker 1: the sort,' said the mouse, getting up and walking away.'
• 29:52
  Speaker 1: You insult me by talking such nonsense.' I didn't mean it,
• 29:57
  Speaker 1: pleaded poor Alice, but you're so easily offended, you know.
• 30:02
  Speaker 1: The mouse only growled in reply. Please come back and
• 30:06
  Speaker 1: finish your story, Alice called after it, and the others
• 30:09
  Speaker 1: all joined in chorus. Yes, please do! But the mouse
• 30:12
  Speaker 1: only shook its head impatiently and walked a little quicker.
• 30:17
  Speaker 1: What a pity it wouldn't stay, sighed the lorry, as
• 30:20
  Speaker 1: soon as it was quite out of sight, and an
• 30:22
  Speaker 1: old crab took the opportunity of saying to her daughter... Ah,
• 30:26
  Speaker 1: my dear, let this be a lesson to you, never
• 30:28
  Speaker 1: to lose your temper. Hold your tongue, ma, said the
• 30:32
  Speaker 1: young crab a little snappishly. You're enough to try the
• 30:35
  Speaker 1: patience of an oyster. I wish I had our diner here.
• 30:39
  Speaker 1: I know I do, said Alice aloud, addressing nobody in particular.
• 30:44
  Speaker 1: She'd soon fetch it back. And who is diner, if
• 30:48
  Speaker 1: I might venture to ask the question, said the lorry.
• 30:52
  Speaker 1: Alice replied eagerly, for she was always ready to talk
• 30:55
  Speaker 1: about her pet. Dinah's our cat, and she's such a
• 30:58
  Speaker 1: capital one for catching mice, you can't think. And oh,
• 31:01
  Speaker 1: I wish you could see her after the birds. Why,
• 31:03
  Speaker 1: she'll eat a little bird as soon as look at it.
• 31:06
  Speaker 1: This speech caused a remarkable sensation among the party. Some
• 31:10
  Speaker 1: of the birds hurried off at once. One old magpie
• 31:13
  Speaker 1: began wrapping itself up very carefully, remarking, I really must
• 31:17
  Speaker 1: be getting home. The night air doesn't suit my throat.
• 31:20
  Speaker 1: And a canary called out in a trembling voice to
• 31:23
  Speaker 1: its children, Come away, my dears. It's a high time
• 31:26
  Speaker 1: you were all in bed. On various pretexts, they all
• 31:29
  Speaker 1: moved off, and Alice was soon left alone. I wish
• 31:32
  Speaker 1: I hadn't mentioned Dinah, she said to herself in a
• 31:35
  Speaker 1: melancholy tone. Nobody seems to like her down here, and
• 31:38
  Speaker 1: I'm sure she is the best cat in the world. Oh,
• 31:41
  Speaker 1: my dear Dinah, I wonder if I shall ever see
• 31:44
  Speaker 1: you any more. And here poor Alice began to cry again,
• 31:47
  Speaker 1: for she felt very lonely and low-spirited. In a little while, however,
• 31:52
  Speaker 1: she again heard a little pattering of footsteps in the distance,
• 31:55
  Speaker 1: and she looked up eagerly, half hoping that the mouse
• 31:57
  Speaker 1: had changed his mind, and was coming back to finish
• 32:00
  Speaker 1: his story. The Rabbit Sends In A Little Bill It
• 32:22
  Speaker 1: was the white rabbit trotting slowly back again, and looking
• 32:25
  Speaker 1: nervously about as it went, as if it had lost something,
• 32:29
  Speaker 1: and she heard it muttering to itself, The Duchess, the Duchess, oh,
• 32:33
  Speaker 1: my dear paws, oh, my fur and whiskers, she'll get
• 32:36
  Speaker 1: me executed as sure as ferrets are ferrets. Where can
• 32:40
  Speaker 1: I have dropped them, I wonder? Alice guessed in a
• 32:43
  Speaker 1: moment that it was looking for the fan and the
• 32:45
  Speaker 1: pair of white kid gloves, and she very good-naturedly began
• 32:49
  Speaker 1: hunting about for them. but they were nowhere to be seen.
• 32:53
  Speaker 1: Everything seemed to have changed since her swim in the pool,
• 32:56
  Speaker 1: and the great hall with the glass table and the
• 32:58
  Speaker 1: little door had vanished completely. Very soon the rabbit noticed
• 33:03
  Speaker 1: Alice as she went hunting about and called out to
• 33:06
  Speaker 1: her in an angry tone, Why, Marianne, what are you
• 33:09
  Speaker 1: doing out here? Run home this moment and fetch me
• 33:12
  Speaker 1: a pair of gloves and a fan. Quick now! And
• 33:16
  Speaker 1: Alice was so much frightened that she ran off at
• 33:18
  Speaker 1: once in the direction it pointed to, without trying to
• 33:21
  Speaker 1: explain the mistake it had made. He took me for
• 33:24
  Speaker 1: his housemaid, she said to herself as she ran. How
• 33:27
  Speaker 1: surprised he'll be when he finds out who I am!
• 33:30
  Speaker 1: But I'd better take him his fan and gloves. That is,
• 33:33
  Speaker 1: if I can find them. As she said this, she
• 33:36
  Speaker 1: came upon a neat little house, on the door of
• 33:38
  Speaker 1: which was a bright brass plate with the name W.
• 33:41
  Speaker 1: Rabbit engraved upon it. She went in without knocking, and
• 33:45
  Speaker 1: hurried upstairs, in great fear lest she should meet the
• 33:47
  Speaker 1: real Marianne, and be turned out of the house before
• 33:50
  Speaker 1: she had found the fan and gloves. How queer it seems,
• 33:54
  Speaker 1: Alice said to herself, to be going messages for a rabbit.
• 33:57
  Speaker 1: I suppose Dinah'll be sending me on messages next, and
• 34:00
  Speaker 1: she began fancying the sort of thing that would happen.
• 34:03
  Speaker 1: Miss Alice, come here directly, and get ready for your walk.
• 34:07
  Speaker 1: Coming in a minute, nurse, but I've got to watch
• 34:09
  Speaker 1: this mouse-hole till Dinah comes back, and see that the
• 34:12
  Speaker 1: mouse doesn't get out. Only I don't think, Alice went on,
• 34:15
  Speaker 1: that they'd let dinah stop in the house if it
• 34:18
  Speaker 1: began ordering people about like that by this time she
• 34:21
  Speaker 1: had found her way into a tidy little room with
• 34:24
  Speaker 1: a table in the window and on it as she
• 34:26
  Speaker 1: had hoped a fan and two or three pairs of
• 34:29
  Speaker 1: tiny white kid gloves she took up the fan and
• 34:32
  Speaker 1: a pair of the gloves and was just going to
• 34:34
  Speaker 1: leave the room when her eye fell upon a little
• 34:37
  Speaker 1: bottle that stood near the looking-glass there was no label
• 34:40
  Speaker 1: this time with the words drink me but nevertheless she
• 34:44
  Speaker 1: uncorked it and put it to her lips I know
• 34:47
  Speaker 1: something interesting is sure to happen, she said to herself,
• 34:50
  Speaker 1: whenever I eat or drink anything. So I'll just see
• 34:53
  Speaker 1: what this bottle does. I do hope it will make
• 34:56
  Speaker 1: me grow large again, for really I'm quite tired of
• 34:58
  Speaker 1: being such a tiny little thing. It did so indeed,
• 35:03
  Speaker 1: and much sooner than she had expected. Before she had
• 35:06
  Speaker 1: drunk half the bottle, she found her head pressing against
• 35:09
  Speaker 1: the ceiling, and had to stoop to save her neck
• 35:11
  Speaker 1: from being broken. She hastily put down the bottle, saying
• 35:14
  Speaker 1: to herself, That's quite enough. I hope I shan't grow
• 35:17
  Speaker 1: any more, as it is I can't get out at
• 35:19
  Speaker 1: the door. I do wish I hadn't drunk quite so much. Alas,
• 35:25
  Speaker 1: it was too late to wish that. She went on growing,
• 35:28
  Speaker 1: and growing, and very soon had to kneel down on
• 35:30
  Speaker 1: the floor. In another minute there was not even room
• 35:33
  Speaker 1: for this, and she tried the effect of lying down
• 35:36
  Speaker 1: with one elbow against the door, and the other arm
• 35:39
  Speaker 1: curled round her head. Still she went on growing, and
• 35:42
  Speaker 1: as a last resource... she put one arm out of
• 35:44
  Speaker 1: the window and one foot up the chimney, and said
• 35:47
  Speaker 1: to herself, Now I can do no more, whatever happens.
• 35:51
  Speaker 1: What will become of me? Luckily for Alice, the little
• 35:55
  Speaker 1: magic bottle had now had its full effect, and she
• 35:58
  Speaker 1: grew no larger. Still, it was very uncomfortable, and as
• 36:01
  Speaker 1: there seemed to be no sort of chance of her
• 36:03
  Speaker 1: ever getting out of the room again, no wonder she
• 36:06
  Speaker 1: felt unhappy. It was much pleasanter at home, thought poor Alice,
• 36:11
  Speaker 1: when one wasn't always growing larger and smaller, and being
• 36:15
  Speaker 1: ordered about by mice and rabbits. I almost wish I
• 36:18
  Speaker 1: hadn't gone down that rabbit hole. And yet— and yet it's
• 36:21
  Speaker 1: rather curious, you know, this sort of life. I do
• 36:25
  Speaker 1: wonder what can have happened to me. When I used
• 36:27
  Speaker 1: to read fairy tales, I fancied that kind of thing
• 36:30
  Speaker 1: never happened, and now here I am in the middle
• 36:32
  Speaker 1: of one. There ought to be a book written about me,
• 36:35
  Speaker 1: that there ought, and when I grow up I'll write one.
• 36:39
  Speaker 1: But I'm grown up now, she added in a sorrowful tone.
• 36:42
  Speaker 1: At least there's no room to grow up any more here.
• 36:46
  Speaker 1: But then, thought Alice, shall I never get any older
• 36:49
  Speaker 1: than I am now? That'll be a comfort one way,
• 36:52
  Speaker 1: never to be an old woman. But then always to
• 36:55
  Speaker 1: have lessons to learn. Oh, I shouldn't like that. Oh,
• 36:59
  Speaker 1: you foolish Alice, she said to herself. How can you
• 37:02
  Speaker 1: learn lessons in here, why there's hardly room for you,
• 37:05
  Speaker 1: and no room at all for any lessons-books? and so
• 37:09
  Speaker 1: she went on taking first one side and then the other,
• 37:12
  Speaker 1: and making quite a conversation of it all together. But
• 37:15
  Speaker 1: after a few minutes she heard a voice outside, and
• 37:18
  Speaker 1: stopped to listen.' Marianne!
• 37:22
  Speaker 2: Marianne!
• 37:23
  Speaker 1: said the voice.' Fetch me my gloves this moment!' Then
• 37:27
  Speaker 1: came a little pattering of feet on the stairs. Alice
• 37:30
  Speaker 1: knew it was the rabbit coming to look for her,
• 37:32
  Speaker 1: and she trembled till she shook the house, quite forgetting
• 37:35
  Speaker 1: that she was now about a thousand times as large
• 37:37
  Speaker 1: as the rabbit. and had no reason to be afraid
• 37:40
  Speaker 1: of it. Presently the rabbit came up to the door
• 37:44
  Speaker 1: and tried to open it, but as the door opened
• 37:47
  Speaker 1: inwards and Alice's elbow was pressed hard against it, that
• 37:50
  Speaker 1: attempt proved a failure. Alice heard it say to itself,
• 37:54
  Speaker 1: Then I'll go round and get in at the window.
• 37:57
  Speaker 1: That you won't, thought Alice, and after waiting till she
• 38:00
  Speaker 1: fancied she heard the rabbit just under the window, she
• 38:03
  Speaker 1: suddenly spread out her hand and made a snatch in
• 38:05
  Speaker 1: the air. She did not get hold of anything, but
• 38:08
  Speaker 1: she heard a little shriek and a fall, and a
• 38:11
  Speaker 1: crash of broken glass, from which she concluded that it
• 38:14
  Speaker 1: was just possible that it had fallen into a cucumber frame,
• 38:17
  Speaker 1: or something of the sort. Next came an angry voice,
• 38:22
  Speaker 1: the rabbit's. Pat, Pat, where are you? And then a
• 38:26
  Speaker 1: voice she had never heard before. Sure, I'm here digging
• 38:30
  Speaker 1: for apples, your honor. Digging for apples, indeed, said the
• 38:34
  Speaker 1: rabbit angrily. Here, come and help me out of this.
• 38:39
  Speaker 1: Sounds of more broken glass. Now tell me, Pat, what's
• 38:42
  Speaker 1: that in the window? Sure, it's an arm, your honor.
• 38:47
  Speaker 1: He pronounced it arm. An arm, you goose. Whoever saw
• 38:51
  Speaker 1: one that size? Why, it fills the whole window. Sure
• 38:56
  Speaker 1: it does, your honor. But it's an arm for all that. Well,
• 39:00
  Speaker 1: it's got no business there at any rate. Go and
• 39:03
  Speaker 1: take it away. There was a long silence after this,
• 39:06
  Speaker 1: and Alice could only hear whispers now and then, such as,' Sure,
• 39:10
  Speaker 1: I don't like it, your Anna, at all, at all!''
• 39:12
  Speaker 1: Do as I tell you, you coward!' And at last
• 39:17
  Speaker 1: she spread out her hand again and made another snatch
• 39:19
  Speaker 1: in the air. This time there were two little shrieks,
• 39:22
  Speaker 1: and more sounds of broken glass.' What a number of
• 39:25
  Speaker 1: cucumber frames there must be,' thought Alice.' I wonder what
• 39:29
  Speaker 1: they'll do next?' As for pulling me out of the window,
• 39:31
  Speaker 1: I only wish they could. I'm sure I don't want
• 39:34
  Speaker 1: to stay in here any longer. She waited for some
• 39:37
  Speaker 1: time without hearing anything more. At last came a rumbling
• 39:40
  Speaker 1: of little cartwheels, and the sound of a good many
• 39:43
  Speaker 1: voices all talking together. She made out the words,' Where' s
• 39:47
  Speaker 1: the other ladder?' Why, I hadn't to bring but one.
• 39:50
  Speaker 1: Bill's got the other. Bill, fetch it here, lad. Here,
• 39:54
  Speaker 1: put him up at this corner. No, tie him together first.
• 39:58
  Speaker 1: They don't reach half high enough yet. Oh, they'll do
• 40:01
  Speaker 1: well enough. Don't be particular. Here, Bill, catch hold of
• 40:04
  Speaker 1: this rope. Will the roof bear? Mind that loose slate. Oh,
• 40:09
  Speaker 1: it's coming down. Heads below! A loud crash. Now, who
• 40:12
  Speaker 1: did that? It was Bill, I fancy. Who's to go
• 40:16
  Speaker 1: down the chimney? Nay, I shan't. You do it. That
• 40:20
  Speaker 1: I won't, then. Bill's to go down. Here, Bill, the
• 40:23
  Speaker 1: master says you've to go down the chimney. Oh, so
• 40:27
  Speaker 1: Bill's got to come down the chimney, has he? said
• 40:30
  Speaker 1: Alice to herself. Why, they seem to put everything upon Bill.
• 40:33
  Speaker 1: I wouldn't be in Bill's place for a good deal.
• 40:37
  Speaker 1: This fireplace is narrow, to be sure, but I think
• 40:39
  Speaker 1: I can kick a little. She drew her foot as
• 40:42
  Speaker 1: far down the chimney as she could, and waited till
• 40:45
  Speaker 1: she heard a little animal. She couldn't guess of what
• 40:47
  Speaker 1: sort it was, scratching and scrambling about in the chimney
• 40:50
  Speaker 1: close above her, then saying to herself,' This is Bill.'
• 40:55
  Speaker 1: She gave one sharp kick and waited to see what
• 40:57
  Speaker 1: would happen next. The first thing she heard was a
• 41:00
  Speaker 1: general chorus of,' There goes Bill!' Then the rabbit's voice alone,'
• 41:04
  Speaker 1: Catch him! You by the hedge!' Then silence, and then
• 41:09
  Speaker 1: another confusion of voices.' Hold up his head!'' Brandy, now,
• 41:14
  Speaker 1: don't choke him. How was it, old fellow? What happened
• 41:17
  Speaker 1: to you? Tell us about it.' At last came a
• 41:20
  Speaker 1: little feeble squeaking voice.' That' s Bill,' thought Alice.' Well, I
• 41:25
  Speaker 1: hardly know. No more, thank ye. I'm better now. But
• 41:29
  Speaker 1: I'm a deal too flustered to tell you. All I
• 41:32
  Speaker 1: know is something comes at me like a jack-in-the-box, and
• 41:35
  Speaker 1: up I goes like a skyrocket.'' So you did, old fellow,'
• 41:39
  Speaker 1: said the others.' We must burn the house down, said
• 41:43
  Speaker 1: the rabbit's voice, and Alice called out as loud as
• 41:45
  Speaker 1: she could. If you do, I'll set Dinah at you.
• 41:50
  Speaker 1: There was a dead silence instantly, and Alice thought to herself,
• 41:54
  Speaker 1: I wonder what they will do next. If they had
• 41:56
  Speaker 1: any sense, they'd take the roof off. After a minute
• 41:59
  Speaker 1: or two, they began moving about again, and Alice heard
• 42:02
  Speaker 1: the rabbit say, A barrelful will do, to begin with.
• 42:06
  Speaker 1: A barrelful of what? thought Alice. but she had not
• 42:09
  Speaker 1: long to doubt for the next moment a shower of
• 42:11
  Speaker 1: little pebbles came rattling in at the window, and some
• 42:14
  Speaker 1: of them hit her in the face.' I' ll put a
• 42:16
  Speaker 1: stop to this,' she said to herself, and shouted out,'
• 42:19
  Speaker 1: You' d better not do that again,' which produced another dead silence.
• 42:24
  Speaker 1: Alice noticed with some surprise that the pebbles were all
• 42:27
  Speaker 1: turning into little cakes as they lay on the floor,
• 42:30
  Speaker 1: and a bright idea came into her head.' If I
• 42:33
  Speaker 1: eat one of these cakes,' she thought,' it' s sure to
• 42:35
  Speaker 1: make some change in my size.' and as it can't
• 42:38
  Speaker 1: possibly make me larger, it must make me smaller, I suppose.
• 42:42
  Speaker 1: So she swallowed one of the cakes, and was delighted
• 42:45
  Speaker 1: to find that she began shrinking directly. As soon as
• 42:48
  Speaker 1: she was small enough to get through the door, she
• 42:50
  Speaker 1: ran out of the house, and found quite a crowd
• 42:52
  Speaker 1: of little animals and birds waiting outside. The poor little
• 42:56
  Speaker 1: lizard Bill was in the middle, being held up by
• 42:58
  Speaker 1: two guinea pigs, who were giving it something out of
• 43:00
  Speaker 1: a bottle. They all made a rush at Alice the
• 43:03
  Speaker 1: moment she appeared, but she ran off as hard as
• 43:05
  Speaker 1: she could, and soon found herself safe in a thick wood.'
• 43:08
  Speaker 1: The first thing I've got to do,' said Alice to
• 43:11
  Speaker 1: herself as she wandered about in the wood,' is to
• 43:14
  Speaker 1: grow to my right size again, and the second thing
• 43:17
  Speaker 1: is to find my way into that lovely garden. I
• 43:19
  Speaker 1: think that will be the best plan.' It sounded an
• 43:22
  Speaker 1: excellent plan, no doubt, and very neatly and simply arranged.
• 43:25
  Speaker 1: The only difficulty was that she had not the smallest
• 43:28
  Speaker 1: idea how to set about it, and while she was
• 43:30
  Speaker 1: peering about anxiously among the trees— A little sharp bark
• 43:34
  Speaker 1: just over her head made her look up in a
• 43:36
  Speaker 1: great hurry. An enormous puppy was looking down at her
• 43:40
  Speaker 1: with large round eyes, and feebly stretching out one paw,
• 43:43
  Speaker 1: trying to touch her. Poor little thing, said Alice in
• 43:47
  Speaker 1: a coaxing tone, and she tried hard to whistle to it,
• 43:50
  Speaker 1: but she was terribly frightened all the time at the
• 43:52
  Speaker 1: thought that it might be hungry, in which case it
• 43:54
  Speaker 1: would be very likely to eat her up in spite
• 43:57
  Speaker 1: of all her coaxing. Hardly knowing what she did, she
• 44:00
  Speaker 1: picked up a little bit of stick and held it
• 44:02
  Speaker 1: out to the puppy, whereupon the puppy jumped into the
• 44:05
  Speaker 1: air off all its feet at once, with a yelp
• 44:07
  Speaker 1: of delight, and rushed at the stick and made believe
• 44:10
  Speaker 1: to worry it. Then Alice dodged behind a great thistle
• 44:13
  Speaker 1: to keep herself from being run over, and the moment
• 44:16
  Speaker 1: she appeared on the other side, the puppy made another
• 44:18
  Speaker 1: rush at the stick and tumbled head over heels in
• 44:21
  Speaker 1: its hurry to get hold of it. Then Alice, thinking
• 44:23
  Speaker 1: it was very like having a game of play with
• 44:26
  Speaker 1: a cart-horse, and expecting every moment to be trampled under
• 44:29
  Speaker 1: its feet, ran round the thistle again. Then the puppy
• 44:32
  Speaker 1: began a series of short charges at the stick, running
• 44:35
  Speaker 1: a little way forwards each time, and a long way back,
• 44:38
  Speaker 1: and barking hoarsely all the while, till at last it
• 44:41
  Speaker 1: sat down a good way off, panting with its tongue
• 44:43
  Speaker 1: hanging out of its mouth, and its great eyes half shut.
• 44:47
  Speaker 1: This seemed to Alice a good opportunity for making her escape,
• 44:51
  Speaker 1: So she set off at once, and ran till she
• 44:53
  Speaker 1: was quite tired and out of breath, and till the
• 44:55
  Speaker 1: puppy's bark sounded quite faint in the distance.' And yet
• 44:59
  Speaker 1: what a dear little puppy it was,' said Alice, as
• 45:02
  Speaker 1: she leaned against a buttercup to rest herself, and fanned
• 45:04
  Speaker 1: herself with one of the leaves.' I should have liked
• 45:07
  Speaker 1: teaching it tricks very much if— if I'd only been the
• 45:11
  Speaker 1: right size to do it. Oh dear, I'd nearly forgotten
• 45:14
  Speaker 1: that I have to grow up again. Let me see,
• 45:17
  Speaker 1: how is it to be managed?' I suppose I ought
• 45:19
  Speaker 1: to eat or drink something or other, but the great
• 45:21
  Speaker 1: question is what? The great question certainly was what. Alice
• 45:27
  Speaker 1: looked all round her at the flowers and the blades
• 45:29
  Speaker 1: of grass, but she could not see anything that looked
• 45:31
  Speaker 1: like the right thing to eat or drink under the circumstances.
• 45:35
  Speaker 1: There was a large mushroom growing near her about the
• 45:37
  Speaker 1: same height as herself, and when she had looked under it,
• 45:40
  Speaker 1: and on both sides of it, and behind it, it
• 45:43
  Speaker 1: occurred to her that she might as well look and
• 45:45
  Speaker 1: see what was on the top of it. She stretched
• 45:48
  Speaker 1: herself up on tiptoe and peeped over the edge of
• 45:51
  Speaker 1: the mushroom, and her eyes immediately met those of a
• 45:54
  Speaker 1: large blue caterpillar that was sitting on the top with
• 45:56
  Speaker 1: its arms folded, quietly smoking a long hookah and taking
• 46:00
  Speaker 1: not the smallest notice of her or of anything else.
• 46:05
  Speaker 1: End of Chapter 4 Chapter 5 of Alice's Adventures in
• 46:15
  Speaker 1: Wonderland by Lewis Carroll This LibriVox recording is in the
• 46:19
  Speaker 1: public domain. Advice from a Caterpillar The Caterpillar and Alice
• 46:26
  Speaker 1: looked at each other for some time in silence. At
• 46:29
  Speaker 1: last the Caterpillar took the hookah out of its mouth
• 46:32
  Speaker 1: and addressed her in a languid, sleepy voice.' Who are you?'
• 46:37
  Speaker 1: said the Caterpillar. This was not an encouraging opening for
• 46:41
  Speaker 1: a conversation. Alice replied rather shyly, I hardly know, sir,
• 46:46
  Speaker 1: just at present. At least I know who I was
• 46:49
  Speaker 1: when I got up this morning. But I think I
• 46:51
  Speaker 1: must have been changed several times since then. What do
• 46:55
  Speaker 1: you mean by that? said the caterpillar sternly. Explain yourself.
• 47:02
  Speaker 1: I can't explain myself, I'm afraid, sir, said Alice, because
• 47:06
  Speaker 1: I'm not myself, you see. I don't see, said the caterpillar.
• 47:12
  Speaker 1: I'm afraid I can't put it more clearly, Alice replied
• 47:15
  Speaker 1: very politely, for I can't understand it myself to begin with,
• 47:19
  Speaker 1: and being so many different sizes in a day is
• 47:22
  Speaker 1: very confusing. It isn't, said the caterpillar. Well, perhaps you
• 47:28
  Speaker 1: haven't found it so yet, said Alice, but when you
• 47:31
  Speaker 1: have to turn into a chrysalis, you will some day,
• 47:33
  Speaker 1: you know, and then after that into a butterfly, I
• 47:36
  Speaker 1: should think you'll feel it a little queer, won't you?
• 47:40
  Speaker 1: Not a bit, said the caterpillar. Well, perhaps your feelings
• 47:44
  Speaker 1: may be different, said Alice. All I know is it
• 47:47
  Speaker 1: would feel very queer to me. You, said the caterpillar contemptuously.
• 47:53
  Speaker 1: Who are you? Which brought them back again to the
• 47:58
  Speaker 1: beginning of the conversation. Alice felt a little irritated at
• 48:02
  Speaker 1: the caterpillars making such very short remarks, and she drew
• 48:06
  Speaker 1: herself up and said very gravely, I think you ought
• 48:09
  Speaker 1: to tell me who you are first. Why? said the caterpillar.
• 48:15
  Speaker 1: Here was another puzzling question, and as Alice could not
• 48:18
  Speaker 1: think of any good reason, and as the caterpillar seemed
• 48:21
  Speaker 1: to be in a very unpleasant state of mind, she
• 48:24
  Speaker 1: turned away. Come back, the caterpillar called after her. I've
• 48:29
  Speaker 1: something important to say. This sounded promising, certainly. Alice turned
• 48:34
  Speaker 1: and came back again. Keep your temper, said the caterpillar.
• 48:41
  Speaker 1: Is that all? said Alice, swallowing down her anger as
• 48:43
  Speaker 1: well as she could. No, said the caterpillar. Alice thought
• 48:48
  Speaker 1: she might as well wait, as she had nothing else
• 48:51
  Speaker 1: to do, and perhaps, after all, it might tell her
• 48:54
  Speaker 1: something worth hearing. For some minutes it puffed away without speaking,
• 48:58
  Speaker 1: but at last it unfolded its arms, took the hookah
• 49:01
  Speaker 1: out of its mouth again, and said, So you think
• 49:04
  Speaker 1: you're changed, do you? I'm afraid I am, sir, said Alice.
• 49:11
  Speaker 1: I can't remember things as I used, and I don't
• 49:13
  Speaker 1: keep the same size for ten minutes together. Can't remember
• 49:18
  Speaker 1: what things, said the caterpillar. Well, I've tried to say
• 49:22
  Speaker 1: how doth the little busy bee, but it all came different,
• 49:26
  Speaker 1: Alice replied in a very melancholy voice. Repeat, you are
• 49:31
  Speaker 1: old Father William, said the caterpillar. Alice folded her hands
• 49:36
  Speaker 1: and began.' You are old, Father William,' the young man said,'
• 49:40
  Speaker 1: and your hair has become very white,' and yet you
• 49:43
  Speaker 1: incessantly stand on your head.' Do you think, at your age,
• 49:47
  Speaker 1: it is right?'' In my youth,' Father William replied to
• 49:50
  Speaker 1: his son,' I feared it might injure the brain.' But
• 49:54
  Speaker 1: now that I am perfectly sure I have none,' why
• 49:57
  Speaker 1: do I do it again and again?'' You are old,'
• 50:00
  Speaker 1: said the youth, as I mentioned before,' and have grown
• 50:03
  Speaker 1: most uncommonly fat.' Yet you turned a back somersault in
• 50:07
  Speaker 1: at the door. Pray, what is the reason of that?
• 50:10
  Speaker 1: In my youth, said the sage, as he shook his
• 50:13
  Speaker 1: grey locks, I kept all my limbs very supple. By
• 50:17
  Speaker 1: the use of this ointment, one shilling the box, Allow
• 50:20
  Speaker 1: me to sell you a couple. You are old, said
• 50:23
  Speaker 1: the youth, and your jaws are too weak For anything
• 50:25
  Speaker 1: tougher than suet. Yet you finished the goose with the
• 50:28
  Speaker 1: bones and the beak. Pray, how did you manage to
• 50:31
  Speaker 1: do it? In my youth, said his father, I took
• 50:34
  Speaker 1: to the law, and argued each case with my wife,
• 50:38
  Speaker 1: and the muscular strength which it gave to my jaw
• 50:40
  Speaker 1: has lasted the rest of my life. You are old,
• 50:44
  Speaker 1: said the youth. One would hardly suppose that your eye
• 50:46
  Speaker 1: was as steady as ever. Yet you balanced an eel
• 50:49
  Speaker 1: on the end of your nose. What made you so
• 50:52
  Speaker 1: awfully clever? I have answered three questions, and that is enough,
• 50:56
  Speaker 1: said his father. Don't give yourself airs. Do you think
• 50:59
  Speaker 1: I can listen all day to such stuff? Be off,
• 51:02
  Speaker 1: or I'll kick you downstairs. That is not said right,
• 51:08
  Speaker 1: said the caterpillar. Not quite right, I'm afraid, said Alice timidly.
• 51:12
  Speaker 1: Some of the words have got altered. It is wrong
• 51:16
  Speaker 1: from beginning to end, said the caterpillar decidedly, and there
• 51:20
  Speaker 1: was silence for some minutes. The caterpillar was the first
• 51:25
  Speaker 1: to speak. What size do you want to be? it asked. Oh,
• 51:31
  Speaker 1: I'm not particular as to size, Alice hastily replied. Only
• 51:35
  Speaker 1: one doesn't like changing so often, you know. I don't know,
• 51:40
  Speaker 1: said the caterpillar. Alice said nothing. She had never been
• 51:46
  Speaker 1: so much contradicted in all her life before, and she
• 51:49
  Speaker 1: felt that she was losing her temper. Are you content now,
• 51:56
  Speaker 1: said the caterpillar. Well, I should like to be a
• 51:59
  Speaker 1: little larger, sir, if you wouldn't mind, said Alice. Three
• 52:02
  Speaker 1: inches is such a wretched height to be. It is
• 52:06
  Speaker 1: a very good height indeed, said the caterpillar angrily, rearing
• 52:11
  Speaker 1: itself upright as it spoke. It was exactly three inches high.
• 52:16
  Speaker 1: But I'm not used to it, pleaded poor Alice in
• 52:19
  Speaker 1: a piteous tone, and she thought to herself, I wish
• 52:22
  Speaker 1: the creatures wouldn't be so easily offended. You'll get used
• 52:27
  Speaker 1: to it in time, said the caterpillar, and it put
• 52:30
  Speaker 1: its hookah into its mouth and began smoking again. This
• 52:34
  Speaker 1: time Alice waited patiently until it chose to speak again.
• 52:38
  Speaker 1: In a minute or two the caterpillar took the hookah
• 52:40
  Speaker 1: out of its mouth and yawned once or twice and
• 52:43
  Speaker 1: shook itself. Then it got down off the mushroom and
• 52:46
  Speaker 1: crawled away into the grass, merely remarking as it went,
• 52:50
  Speaker 1: One side will make you grow taller, and the other
• 52:53
  Speaker 1: side will make you grow shorter. One side of what?
• 52:59
  Speaker 1: The other side of what? thought Alice to herself. Of
• 53:02
  Speaker 1: the mushroom, said the caterpillar, just as if she had
• 53:05
  Speaker 1: asked it aloud, and in another moment it was out
• 53:08
  Speaker 1: of sight. Alice remained looking thoughtfully at the mushroom for
• 53:13
  Speaker 1: a minute, trying to make out which were the two
• 53:16
  Speaker 1: sides of it, and as it was perfectly round, she
• 53:19
  Speaker 1: found this a very difficult question. However, at last she
• 53:23
  Speaker 1: stretched her arms round it as far as they would go,
• 53:25
  Speaker 1: and broke off a bit of the edge with each hand.
• 53:29
  Speaker 1: And now which is which? she said to herself, and
• 53:32
  Speaker 1: nibbled a little of the right-hand bit to try the effect.
• 53:35
  Speaker 1: The next moment she felt a violent blow underneath her chin.
• 53:39
  Speaker 1: It had struck her foot. She was a good deal
• 53:42
  Speaker 1: frightened by this very sudden change, but she felt that
• 53:45
  Speaker 1: there was no time to be lost, and as she
• 53:47
  Speaker 1: was shrinking rapidly, so she set to work at once
• 53:50
  Speaker 1: to eat some of the other bit. Her chin was
• 53:53
  Speaker 1: pressed so closely against her foot that there was hardly
• 53:55
  Speaker 1: room to open her mouth, but she did it at
• 53:58
  Speaker 1: last and managed to swallow a morsel of the left-hand bit.' Come,
• 54:02
  Speaker 1: my head's free at last!' said Alice in a tone
• 54:04
  Speaker 1: of delight, which changed into alarm in another moment, when
• 54:08
  Speaker 1: she found that her shoulders were nowhere to be found.
• 54:11
  Speaker 1: All she could see, when she looked down, was an
• 54:14
  Speaker 1: immense length of neck, which seemed to rise like a
• 54:16
  Speaker 1: stalk out of a sea of green leaves that lay
• 54:19
  Speaker 1: far below her.' What can all that green stuff be?'
• 54:22
  Speaker 1: said Alice, And where have my shoulders got to? And
• 54:25
  Speaker 1: all my poor hands! How is it I cannot see you?
• 54:29
  Speaker 1: She was moving them about as she spoke, but no
• 54:31
  Speaker 1: result seemed to follow, except a little shaking among the
• 54:34
  Speaker 1: distant green leaves. As there seemed to be no chance
• 54:38
  Speaker 1: of getting her hands up to her head, she tried
• 54:41
  Speaker 1: to get her head down to them, and was delighted
• 54:43
  Speaker 1: to find that her neck would bend about easily in
• 54:45
  Speaker 1: any direction, like a serpent. She had just succeeded in
• 54:49
  Speaker 1: curving it down into a graceful zigzag and was going
• 54:52
  Speaker 1: to dive in among the leaves, which she found to
• 54:55
  Speaker 1: be nothing but the tops of the trees under which
• 54:57
  Speaker 1: she had been wandering, when a sharp hiss made her
• 55:00
  Speaker 1: draw back in a hurry. A large pigeon had flown
• 55:03
  Speaker 1: into her face and was beating her violently with its wings. Serpent!
• 55:08
  Speaker 1: screamed the pigeon. I'm not a serpent, said Alice indignantly.
• 55:12
  Speaker 1: Let me alone. Serpent, I say again, repeated the pigeon,
• 55:17
  Speaker 1: but in a more subdued tone, and added with a
• 55:19
  Speaker 1: kind of a sob. I've tried every way, and nothing
• 55:23
  Speaker 1: seems to suit them. I haven't the least idea what
• 55:26
  Speaker 1: you're talking about, said Alice. I've tried the roots of trees,
• 55:30
  Speaker 1: and I've tried banks, and I've tried hedges, the pigeon
• 55:34
  Speaker 1: went on, without attending to her. But those serpents, there's
• 55:38
  Speaker 1: no pleasing them. Alice was more and more puzzled. but
• 55:43
  Speaker 1: she thought there was no use in saying anything more
• 55:45
  Speaker 1: till the pigeon had finished. As if it wasn't trouble
• 55:49
  Speaker 1: enough hatching the eggs, said the pigeon, but I must
• 55:52
  Speaker 1: be on the lookout for serpents night and day. Why,
• 55:55
  Speaker 1: I haven't had a wink of sleep these three weeks.
• 55:59
  Speaker 1: I'm very sorry you've been annoyed, said Alice, who was
• 56:02
  Speaker 1: beginning to see its meaning. And just as I'd taken
• 56:05
  Speaker 1: the highest tree in the wood, continued the pigeon, raising
• 56:08
  Speaker 1: its voice to a shriek, and just as I was
• 56:10
  Speaker 1: thinking I should be free of them at last, they
• 56:13
  Speaker 1: must needs come wriggling down from the sky. Ach, serpent!
• 56:18
  Speaker 1: But I'm not a serpent, I tell you, said Alice.
• 56:21
  Speaker 1: I'm a... I'm a... Well, what are you? said the pigeon.
• 56:26
  Speaker 1: I can see you're trying to invent something. I... I'm
• 56:29
  Speaker 1: a little girl, said Alice rather doubtfully, and she remembered
• 56:33
  Speaker 1: the number of changes she had gone through that day.
• 56:36
  Speaker 1: A likely story indeed, said the pigeon in a tone
• 56:39
  Speaker 1: of the deepest contempt. I've seen a good many little
• 56:43
  Speaker 1: girls in my time, but never one with such a
• 56:46
  Speaker 1: neck as that. No, no, you are a serpent, and
• 56:49
  Speaker 1: there's no use denying it. I suppose you'll be telling
• 56:52
  Speaker 1: me next that you never tasted an egg. I have
• 56:56
  Speaker 1: tasted eggs certainly, said Alice, who was a very truthful child,
• 57:00
  Speaker 1: but little girls eat eggs quite as much as serpents do,
• 57:03
  Speaker 1: you know. I don't believe it, said the pigeon, but
• 57:06
  Speaker 1: if they do, why, then they're a kind of serpent,
• 57:09
  Speaker 1: that's all I can say. This was such a new
• 57:12
  Speaker 1: idea to Alice that she was quite silent for a
• 57:15
  Speaker 1: minute or two, which gave the pigeon the opportunity of adding,
• 57:19
  Speaker 1: You're looking for eggs, I know that well enough, and
• 57:21
  Speaker 1: what does it matter to me whether you're a little
• 57:23
  Speaker 1: girl or a serpent? It matters a good deal to me,
• 57:27
  Speaker 1: said Alice hastily, but I'm not looking for eggs as
• 57:30
  Speaker 1: it happens, and if I was, I shouldn't want yours.
• 57:33
  Speaker 1: I don't like them raw. Well, be off then, said
• 57:37
  Speaker 1: the pigeon in a sulky tone, as it settled down
• 57:40
  Speaker 1: again into its nest. Alice crouched down among the trees
• 57:44
  Speaker 1: as well as she could, for her neck kept getting
• 57:46
  Speaker 1: entangled among the branches, and every now and then she
• 57:49
  Speaker 1: had to stop and untwist it. After a while she
• 57:52
  Speaker 1: remembered that she still held the pieces of mushroom in
• 57:55
  Speaker 1: her hands, and she set to work very carefully, nibbling
• 57:58
  Speaker 1: first at one and then at the other, and growing
• 58:01
  Speaker 1: sometimes taller and sometimes shorter, until she had succeeded in
• 58:04
  Speaker 1: bringing herself down to her usual height. It was so
• 58:08
  Speaker 1: long since she had been anything near the right size
• 58:11
  Speaker 1: that it felt quite strange at first, but she got
• 58:14
  Speaker 1: used to it in a few minutes and began talking
• 58:16
  Speaker 1: to herself as usual. Come, there's half my plan done now.
• 58:21
  Speaker 1: How puzzling all these changes are. I'm never sure what
• 58:23
  Speaker 1: I'm going to be, from one minute to another. However,
• 58:27
  Speaker 1: I've got back to my right size. The next thing
• 58:29
  Speaker 1: is to get into that beautiful garden. How is that
• 58:32
  Speaker 1: to be done, I wonder? As she said this, she
• 58:35
  Speaker 1: came suddenly upon an open place, with a little house
• 58:38
  Speaker 1: in it about four feet high. Whoever lives there, thought Alice,
• 58:42
  Speaker 1: it'll never do to come upon them this size. Why,
• 58:46
  Speaker 1: I should frighten them out of their wits. So she
• 58:48
  Speaker 1: began nibbling at the right-hand bed again, and did not
• 58:52
  Speaker 1: venture to go near the house till she had brought
• 58:54
  Speaker 1: herself down to nine inches high. End of chapter 5
• 59:05
  Speaker 1: Chapter 6 of Alice's Adventures in Wonderland by Lewis Carroll
• 59:16
  Speaker 1: FOR A MINUTE OR TWO SHE STOOD LOOKING AT THE
• 59:18
  Speaker 1: HOUSE AND WONDERING WHAT TO DO NEXT, WHEN SUDDENLY A
• 59:21
  Speaker 1: FOOTMAN IN LIVERY CAME RUNNING OUT OF THE WOOD. SHE
• 59:24
  Speaker 1: CONSIDERED HIM TO BE A FOOTMAN BECAUSE HE WAS IN LIVERY,
• 59:27
  Speaker 1: OTHERWISE JUDGING BY HIS FACE ONLY SHE WOULD HAVE CALLED
• 59:30
  Speaker 1: HIM A FISH, AND WRAPPED LOUDLY AT THE DOOR WITH
• 59:33
  Speaker 1: HIS KNUCKLES. it was opened by another footman in livery
• 59:37
  Speaker 1: with a round face and large eyes like a frog
• 59:40
  Speaker 1: and both footmen alice noticed had powdered hair that curled
• 59:43
  Speaker 1: all over their heads she felt very curious to know
• 59:46
  Speaker 1: what it was all about and crept a little way
• 59:48
  Speaker 1: out of the wood to listen the fish footman began
• 59:52
  Speaker 1: by producing from under his arm a great letter, nearly
• 59:55
  Speaker 1: as large as himself, and this he handed over to
• 59:58
  Speaker 1: the other, saying in a solemn tone, For the Duchess,
• 1:00:02
  Speaker 1: an invitation from the Queen to play croquet. The frog-foot
• 1:00:06
  Speaker 1: men repeated in the same solemn tone, only changing the
• 1:00:09
  Speaker 1: order of the words a little. From the Queen, an
• 1:00:13
  Speaker 1: invitation for the Duchess to play croquet. Then they both
• 1:00:18
  Speaker 1: bowed low, and their curls got entangled together. Alice laughed
• 1:00:23
  Speaker 1: so much at this that she had to run back
• 1:00:25
  Speaker 1: into the wood for fear of their hearing her, and
• 1:00:28
  Speaker 1: when she next peeped out the fish footman was gone
• 1:00:30
  Speaker 1: and the other was sitting on the ground near the door,
• 1:00:33
  Speaker 1: staring stupidly up into the sky. Alice went timidly up
• 1:00:38
  Speaker 1: to the door and knocked. There's no use in knocking,
• 1:00:42
  Speaker 1: said the footman, and that for two reasons. First, because
• 1:00:46
  Speaker 1: I'm on the same side of the door as you are, Secondly,
• 1:00:49
  Speaker 1: because they're making such a noise inside, no one could
• 1:00:52
  Speaker 1: possibly hear you. And certainly there was a most extraordinary
• 1:00:56
  Speaker 1: noise going on within, a constant howling and sneezing, and
• 1:01:00
  Speaker 1: every now and then a great crash, as if a
• 1:01:02
  Speaker 1: dish or kettle had been broken to pieces. Please then,
• 1:01:06
  Speaker 1: said Alice, how am I to get in? There might
• 1:01:09
  Speaker 1: be some sense in your knocking, the footman went on
• 1:01:12
  Speaker 1: without attending to her, if we have the door between us.
• 1:01:16
  Speaker 1: For instance, if you were inside, you might knock and
• 1:01:19
  Speaker 1: I could let you out, you know. He was looking
• 1:01:22
  Speaker 1: up into the sky all the time he was speaking,
• 1:01:24
  Speaker 1: and this Alice thought decidedly uncivil. But perhaps he can't
• 1:01:28
  Speaker 1: help it, she said to herself. His eyes are so
• 1:01:31
  Speaker 1: very nearly at the top of his head. But at
• 1:01:33
  Speaker 1: any rate, he might answer questions. How am I to
• 1:01:37
  Speaker 1: get in? she repeated aloud. I shall sit here, the
• 1:01:40
  Speaker 1: footman remarked, till to-morrow. At this moment the door of
• 1:01:45
  Speaker 1: the house opened and a large plate came skimming out
• 1:01:48
  Speaker 1: straight at the footman's head. It just grazed his nose
• 1:01:51
  Speaker 1: and broke to pieces against one of the trees behind him.'
• 1:01:53
  Speaker 1: All next day, maybe,' the footman continued in the same tone,
• 1:01:58
  Speaker 1: exactly as if nothing had happened.' How am I to
• 1:02:02
  Speaker 1: get in?' asked Alice again in a louder tone.' Are
• 1:02:06
  Speaker 1: you to get in at all?' said the footman.' That' s
• 1:02:09
  Speaker 1: the first question, you know.' It was, no doubt, only
• 1:02:14
  Speaker 1: Alice did not like to be told so. It's really dreadful,
• 1:02:17
  Speaker 1: she muttered to herself, the way all the creatures argue.
• 1:02:20
  Speaker 1: It's enough to drive one crazy. The footman seemed to
• 1:02:23
  Speaker 1: consider this a good opportunity for repeating his remark with variations.
• 1:02:28
  Speaker 1: I shall sit here, he said, on and off for
• 1:02:31
  Speaker 1: days and days. But what am I to do?
• 1:02:34
  Speaker 2: Said Alice.
• 1:02:37
  Speaker 1: Anything you like, said the footman, and began whistling. Oh,
• 1:02:41
  Speaker 1: there's no use in talking to him, said Alice desperately.
• 1:02:44
  Speaker 1: He's perfectly idiotic. And she opened the door and went in.
• 1:02:48
  Speaker 1: The door led right into a large kitchen, which was
• 1:02:51
  Speaker 1: full of smoke from one end to the other. The
• 1:02:53
  Speaker 1: Duchess was sitting on a three-legged stool in the middle,
• 1:02:56
  Speaker 1: nursing a baby. The cook was leaning over the fire,
• 1:02:59
  Speaker 1: stirring a large cauldron which seemed to be full of soup.
• 1:03:03
  Speaker 1: There's certainly too much pepper in that soup, Alice said
• 1:03:06
  Speaker 1: to herself, as well as she could for sneezing. There
• 1:03:09
  Speaker 1: was certainly too much of it in the air. Even
• 1:03:11
  Speaker 1: the Duchess sneezed occasionally, and the baby was sneezing and
• 1:03:15
  Speaker 1: howling alternately, without a moment's pause. The only things in
• 1:03:18
  Speaker 1: the kitchen that did not sneeze were the cook and
• 1:03:21
  Speaker 1: a large cat which was sitting on the hearth and
• 1:03:23
  Speaker 1: grinning from ear to ear.' Please, would you tell me,'
• 1:03:28
  Speaker 1: said Alice a little timidly, for she was not quite
• 1:03:30
  Speaker 1: sure whether it was good manners for her to speak first,'
• 1:03:33
  Speaker 1: why your cat grins like that?'' It' s a Cheshire cat,'
• 1:03:37
  Speaker 1: said the Duchess,' and that's why. Pig!' She said the
• 1:03:41
  Speaker 1: last word with such sudden violence that Alice quite jumped,
• 1:03:45
  Speaker 1: but she saw in another moment that it was addressed
• 1:03:47
  Speaker 1: to the baby and not to her, so she took
• 1:03:49
  Speaker 1: courage and went on again.' I didn't know that Cheshire
• 1:03:53
  Speaker 1: cats always grinned. In fact, I didn't know that cats
• 1:03:56
  Speaker 1: could grin.'' They all can, and most of them do.''
• 1:04:00
  Speaker 1: I don't know of any that do,' Alice said very politely,
• 1:04:03
  Speaker 1: feeling quite pleased to have got into a conversation.' You
• 1:04:07
  Speaker 1: don't know much,' said the Duchess,' and that's a fact.'
• 1:04:11
  Speaker 1: Alice did not at all like the tone of this remark,
• 1:04:14
  Speaker 1: and thought it would be as well to introduce some
• 1:04:16
  Speaker 1: other subject of conversation. While she was trying to fix
• 1:04:19
  Speaker 1: on one, the cook took the cauldron of soup off
• 1:04:22
  Speaker 1: the fire, and at once set to work throwing everything
• 1:04:24
  Speaker 1: within her reach at the Duchess and the baby. The
• 1:04:27
  Speaker 1: fire irons came first, then followed a shower of saucepans, plates,
• 1:04:31
  Speaker 1: and dishes. The Duchess took no notice of them even
• 1:04:34
  Speaker 1: when they hit her, and the baby was howling so
• 1:04:37
  Speaker 1: much already that it was quite impossible to say whether
• 1:04:40
  Speaker 1: the blows hurt it or not. Oh, please, mind what
• 1:04:44
  Speaker 1: you're doing, cried Alice, jumping up and down in an
• 1:04:47
  Speaker 1: agony of terror. Oh, there goes his precious nose, as
• 1:04:51
  Speaker 1: an unusually large saucepan flew close by it, and very
• 1:04:54
  Speaker 1: nearly carried it off. If everybody minded their own business,
• 1:04:59
  Speaker 1: the Duchess said in a hoarse growl, the world would
• 1:05:01
  Speaker 1: go round a deal faster than it does. Which would
• 1:05:05
  Speaker 1: not be an advantage, said Alice, who felt very glad
• 1:05:08
  Speaker 1: to get an opportunity of showing off a little of
• 1:05:10
  Speaker 1: her knowledge. Just think what work it would make with
• 1:05:13
  Speaker 1: the day and the night. You see, the earth takes
• 1:05:16
  Speaker 1: twenty-four hours to turn round on its axis.'' Talking of axes,'
• 1:05:21
  Speaker 1: said the Duchess,' chop off her head!' Alice glanced rather
• 1:05:25
  Speaker 1: anxiously at the cook to see if she meant to
• 1:05:27
  Speaker 1: take the hint, but the cook was busily engaged in
• 1:05:30
  Speaker 1: stirring the soup and did not seem to be listening,
• 1:05:32
  Speaker 1: so she ventured to go on again.' Twenty- four hours, I think,
• 1:05:37
  Speaker 1: or is it twelve? I—'' Oh, don't bother me,' said
• 1:05:41
  Speaker 1: the Duchess.' I never could abide figures. And with that,
• 1:05:45
  Speaker 1: she began nursing her child again, singing a sort of
• 1:05:47
  Speaker 1: lullaby to it as she did so, and giving it
• 1:05:50
  Speaker 1: a violent shake at the end of every line. Speak
• 1:05:54
  Speaker 1: roughly to your little boy and beat him when he sneezes.
• 1:05:58
  Speaker 1: He only does it to annoy because he knows it teases.
• 1:06:02
  Speaker 1: Chorus in which the cook and the baby joined. Wow, wow, wow.
• 1:06:08
  Speaker 1: While the Duchess sang the second verse of the song,
• 1:06:11
  Speaker 1: she kept tossing the baby violently up and down, and
• 1:06:14
  Speaker 1: the poor little thing howled so that Alice could hardly
• 1:06:17
  Speaker 1: hear the words. I speak severely to my boy. I
• 1:06:21
  Speaker 1: beat him when he sneezes, for he can thoroughly enjoy
• 1:06:24
  Speaker 1: the pepper when he pleases. Wow, wow, wow. Here, you
• 1:06:31
  Speaker 1: may nurse it a bit if you like, the Duchess
• 1:06:33
  Speaker 1: said to Alice, flinging the baby at her as she spoke.
• 1:06:37
  Speaker 1: I must go and get ready to play croquet with
• 1:06:39
  Speaker 1: the queen. And she hurried out of the room. The
• 1:06:42
  Speaker 1: cook threw a frying pan after her as she went out,
• 1:06:45
  Speaker 1: but it just missed her. Alice caught the baby with
• 1:06:48
  Speaker 1: some difficulty, as it was a queer-shaped little creature and
• 1:06:52
  Speaker 1: held out its arms and legs in all directions. Just
• 1:06:54
  Speaker 1: like a starfish, thought Alice. The poor little thing was
• 1:06:58
  Speaker 1: snorting like a steam engine when she caught it and
• 1:07:00
  Speaker 1: kept doubling itself up and straightening itself out again so
• 1:07:04
  Speaker 1: that altogether, for the first minute or two, It was
• 1:07:07
  Speaker 1: as much as she could do to hold it. As
• 1:07:09
  Speaker 1: soon as she had made out the proper way of
• 1:07:11
  Speaker 1: nursing it, which was to twist it up into a
• 1:07:14
  Speaker 1: knot and then keep tight hold of its right ear
• 1:07:16
  Speaker 1: and left foot so as to prevent its undoing itself,
• 1:07:19
  Speaker 1: she carried it out into the open air. If I
• 1:07:22
  Speaker 1: don't take this child away with me, thought Alice, they're
• 1:07:24
  Speaker 1: sure to kill it in a day or two. Wouldn't
• 1:07:27
  Speaker 1: it be murder to leave it behind? She said the
• 1:07:31
  Speaker 1: last words out loud, and the little thing grunted in reply.
• 1:07:34
  Speaker 1: It had left off sneezing by this time. Don't grunt,
• 1:07:38
  Speaker 1: said Alice. That's not at all a proper way of
• 1:07:40
  Speaker 1: expressing yourself. The baby grunted again, and Alice looked very
• 1:07:44
  Speaker 1: anxiously into its face to see what was the matter
• 1:07:47
  Speaker 1: with it. There could be no doubt that it had
• 1:07:49
  Speaker 1: a very turn-up nose, much more like a snout than
• 1:07:52
  Speaker 1: a real nose. Also, its eyes were getting extremely small
• 1:07:55
  Speaker 1: for a baby. Altogether, Alice did not like the look
• 1:07:59
  Speaker 1: of the thing at all. But perhaps it was only sobbing,
• 1:08:02
  Speaker 1: she thought, and looked into its eyes again to see
• 1:08:04
  Speaker 1: if there were any tears. No, there were no tears.
• 1:08:08
  Speaker 1: If you're going to turn into a pig, my dear,
• 1:08:10
  Speaker 1: said Alice seriously, I'll have nothing more to do with you,
• 1:08:12
  Speaker 1: mind now. The poor little thing sobbed again, or grunted,
• 1:08:17
  Speaker 1: it was impossible to say which, and they went on
• 1:08:20
  Speaker 1: for some while in silence. Alice was just beginning to
• 1:08:24
  Speaker 1: think to herself, Now what am I to do with
• 1:08:26
  Speaker 1: this creature when I get it home? when it grunted
• 1:08:29
  Speaker 1: again so violently that she looked down into its face
• 1:08:31
  Speaker 1: in some alarm. This time there could be no mistake
• 1:08:34
  Speaker 1: about it, it was neither more nor less than a pig,
• 1:08:38
  Speaker 1: and she felt that it would be quite absurd for
• 1:08:40
  Speaker 1: her to carry it any further. So she sat the
• 1:08:43
  Speaker 1: little creature down, and felt quite relieved to see it
• 1:08:45
  Speaker 1: trot quietly away into the wood. If it had grown up,
• 1:08:49
  Speaker 1: she said to herself, it would have made a dreadfully
• 1:08:51
  Speaker 1: ugly child, but it makes rather a handsome pig, I think.
• 1:08:55
  Speaker 1: And she began thinking over other children she knew, who
• 1:08:58
  Speaker 1: might do very well as pigs. and was just saying
• 1:09:01
  Speaker 1: to herself, if only I knew the right way to
• 1:09:03
  Speaker 1: change them, when she was a little startled by seeing
• 1:09:06
  Speaker 1: the Cheshire Cat sitting on a bough of a tree
• 1:09:09
  Speaker 1: a few yards off. The cat only grinned when it
• 1:09:11
  Speaker 1: saw Alice. It looked good-natured, she thought, still it had
• 1:09:15
  Speaker 1: very long claws and a great many teeth, so she
• 1:09:18
  Speaker 1: felt that it ought to be treated with respect. Cheshire Puss,
• 1:09:22
  Speaker 1: she began rather timidly, as she did not at all
• 1:09:24
  Speaker 1: know whether it would like the name. However, it only
• 1:09:27
  Speaker 1: grinned a little wider. Come, it's pleased so far, thought Alice,
• 1:09:31
  Speaker 1: and she went on. Would you tell me, please, which
• 1:09:34
  Speaker 1: way I ought to go from here? That depends a
• 1:09:37
  Speaker 1: good deal on where you want to go, said the cat.
• 1:09:41
  Speaker 1: I don't much care where, said Alice. Then it doesn't
• 1:09:44
  Speaker 1: matter which way you go, said the cat. So long
• 1:09:49
  Speaker 1: as I get somewhere, Alice added as an explanation. Oh,
• 1:09:53
  Speaker 1: you're sure to do that, said the cat, if.
• 1:09:55
  Speaker 2: Only you walk long enough.
• 1:09:58
  Speaker 1: Alice felt that this could not be denied, so she
• 1:10:01
  Speaker 1: tried another question. What sort of people live about here?
• 1:10:05
  Speaker 1: In that direction, the cat said, waving its right paw round,
• 1:10:09
  Speaker 1: lives a hatter, and in that direction, waving the other paw,
• 1:10:14
  Speaker 1: lives a march hare. Visit either you like, they're both mad.
• 1:10:19
  Speaker 1: But I don't want to go among mad people, Alice remarked. Oh,
• 1:10:23
  Speaker 1: you can't help that, said the cat. We're all mad here.
• 1:10:28
  Speaker 1: I'm mad. You're mad. How do you know I'm mad,
• 1:10:33
  Speaker 1: said Alice? You must be, said the cat, or you
• 1:10:37
  Speaker 1: wouldn't have come here. Alice didn't think that proved it
• 1:10:42
  Speaker 1: at all. However, she went on. And how do you
• 1:10:45
  Speaker 1: know that you're mad? To begin with, said the cat,
• 1:10:49
  Speaker 1: a dog's not mad, you grant that? I suppose so,
• 1:10:53
  Speaker 1: said Alice. Well then, the cat went on, you see,
• 1:10:57
  Speaker 1: a dog growls when it's angry, and wags its tail
• 1:11:00
  Speaker 1: when it's pleased. Now I growl when I'm pleased, and
• 1:11:05
  Speaker 1: wag my tail when I'm angry. Therefore I'm mad. I
• 1:11:11
  Speaker 1: call it purring, not growling, said Alice. Call it what
• 1:11:15
  Speaker 1: you like, said the cat. Do you play croquet with
• 1:11:17
  Speaker 1: the queen today? I should like it very much, said Alice,
• 1:11:22
  Speaker 1: but I haven't been invited yet. You'll see me there,
• 1:11:26
  Speaker 1: said the cat, and vanished. Alice was not much surprised
• 1:11:30
  Speaker 1: at this. She was getting so used to queer things happening.
• 1:11:33
  Speaker 1: While she was looking at the place where it had been,
• 1:11:36
  Speaker 1: it suddenly appeared again. By the by, what became of
• 1:11:41
  Speaker 1: the baby? said the cat. I'd nearly forgotten to ask.
• 1:11:45
  Speaker 1: It turned into a pig, Alice quietly said, just as
• 1:11:48
  Speaker 1: if it had come back in a natural way. I
• 1:11:50
  Speaker 1: thought it would, said the cat, and vanished again. Alice
• 1:11:54
  Speaker 1: waited a little, half expecting to see it again, but
• 1:11:57
  Speaker 1: it did not appear, and after a minute or two
• 1:11:59
  Speaker 1: she walked on in the direction in which the March
• 1:12:01
  Speaker 1: Hare was said to live. I've seen Hatters before, she
• 1:12:05
  Speaker 1: said to herself. The March Hare will be much the
• 1:12:07
  Speaker 1: most interesting, and perhaps as this is May it won't
• 1:12:10
  Speaker 1: be raving mad, at least not so mad as it
• 1:12:12
  Speaker 1: was in March. As she said this, she looked up,
• 1:12:16
  Speaker 1: and there was the cat again, sitting on the branch
• 1:12:18
  Speaker 1: of a tree. Did you say pig or fig? said
• 1:12:22
  Speaker 1: the cat. I said pig, replied Alice, and I wish
• 1:12:26
  Speaker 1: you wouldn't keep appearing and vanishing so suddenly. You make
• 1:12:29
  Speaker 1: one quite giddy. All right, said the cat, and this
• 1:12:33
  Speaker 1: time it vanished quite slowly, beginning with the end of
• 1:12:36
  Speaker 1: the tail and ending with the grin, which remained some
• 1:12:39
  Speaker 1: time after the rest of it had gone. Well, I've
• 1:12:42
  Speaker 1: often seen a cat without a grin, thought Alice, but
• 1:12:45
  Speaker 1: a grin without a cat, it's the most curious thing
• 1:12:48
  Speaker 1: I ever saw in all my life. She had not
• 1:12:50
  Speaker 1: gone much farther before she came inside of the house
• 1:12:53
  Speaker 1: of the March Hare. She thought it must be the
• 1:12:56
  Speaker 1: right house, because the chimneys were shaped like ears, and
• 1:12:59
  Speaker 1: the roof was thatched with fur. It was so large
• 1:13:01
  Speaker 1: a house that she did not like to go nearer
• 1:13:03
  Speaker 1: till she had nibbled some more of the left-hand bit
• 1:13:05
  Speaker 1: of mushroom, and raised herself to about two feet high.
• 1:13:09
  Speaker 1: Even then she walked up towards it rather timidly, saying
• 1:13:12
  Speaker 1: to herself,' Suppose it should be raving mad after all.
• 1:13:15
  Speaker 1: I almost wish I'd gone to see the Hatter instead.'
• 1:13:21
  Speaker 1: End of Chapter 6 Chapter 7 of Alice's Adventures in
• 1:13:31
  Speaker 1: Wonderland by Lewis Carroll This LibriVox recording is in the
• 1:13:36
  Speaker 1: public domain. A Mad Tea Party There was a table
• 1:13:42
  Speaker 1: set out under a tree in front of the house,
• 1:13:44
  Speaker 1: and the March Hare and the Hatter were having tea
• 1:13:47
  Speaker 1: at it. A Dormouse was sitting between them, fast asleep,
• 1:13:50
  Speaker 1: and the other two were using it as a cushion,
• 1:13:52
  Speaker 1: resting their elbows on it, and talking over its head.
• 1:13:57
  Speaker 1: Very uncomfortable for the Dormouse, thought Alice, only as it's asleep,
• 1:14:01
  Speaker 1: suppose it doesn't mind. The table was a large one,
• 1:14:04
  Speaker 1: but the three were all crowded together at one corner
• 1:14:07
  Speaker 1: of it. No room, no room, they cried out when
• 1:14:10
  Speaker 1: they saw Alice coming. There's plenty of room, said Alice indignantly,
• 1:14:15
  Speaker 1: and she sat down in a large armchair at one
• 1:14:17
  Speaker 1: end of the table. Have some wine, the March Hare
• 1:14:22
  Speaker 1: said in an encouraging tone. Alice looked all round the table,
• 1:14:27
  Speaker 1: but there was nothing on it but tea. I don't
• 1:14:30
  Speaker 1: see any wine, she remarked. There isn't any, said the
• 1:14:33
  Speaker 1: March Hare. Then it wasn't very civil of you to
• 1:14:36
  Speaker 1: offer it, said Alice angrily. It wasn't very civil of
• 1:14:40
  Speaker 1: you to sit down without being invited, said the March Hare.
• 1:14:45
  Speaker 1: I didn't know it was your table, said Alice. It's
• 1:14:47
  Speaker 1: laid for a great many more than three. Your hair
• 1:14:51
  Speaker 1: wants cutting, said the Hatter. He had been looking at
• 1:14:54
  Speaker 1: Alice for some time with great curiosity, and this was
• 1:14:58
  Speaker 1: his first speech. You should learn not to make personal remarks,
• 1:15:02
  Speaker 1: Alice said with some severity. It's very rude. The Hatter
• 1:15:06
  Speaker 1: opened his eyes very wide on hearing this, but all
• 1:15:10
  Speaker 1: he said was, Why is a raven like a writing-desk? Come,
• 1:15:15
  Speaker 1: we shall have some fun now, thought Alice. I'm glad
• 1:15:18
  Speaker 1: they've begun asking riddles. I believe I can guess that,
• 1:15:21
  Speaker 1: she added aloud. Do you mean that you think you
• 1:15:25
  Speaker 1: can find out the answer to it? said the March Hare.
• 1:15:28
  Speaker 1: Exactly so, said Alice. Then you should say what you mean,
• 1:15:32
  Speaker 1: the March Hare went on. I do, Alice hastily replied.
• 1:15:37
  Speaker 1: At least, at least I mean what I say. That's
• 1:15:39
  Speaker 1: the same thing you know. Not the same thing a bit,
• 1:15:43
  Speaker 1: said the Hatter. Why, you might just as well say
• 1:15:46
  Speaker 1: that I see what I eat is the same thing
• 1:15:48
  Speaker 1: as I eat what I see. You might just as
• 1:15:51
  Speaker 1: well say, added the March Hare, that I like what
• 1:15:54
  Speaker 1: I get is the same thing as I get what
• 1:15:57
  Speaker 1: I like. You might just as well say, added the Dormouse,
• 1:16:01
  Speaker 1: which seemed to be talking in his sleep, that I
• 1:16:04
  Speaker 1: breathe when I sleep is the same thing as I
• 1:16:07
  Speaker 1: sleep when I breathe. It is the same thing with you,
• 1:16:12
  Speaker 1: said the Hatter, and here the conversation dropped and the
• 1:16:16
  Speaker 1: party sat silent for a minute while Alice thought over
• 1:16:19
  Speaker 1: all she could remember about Ravens and writing desks, which
• 1:16:22
  Speaker 1: wasn't much. The Hatter was the first to break the silence.'
• 1:16:27
  Speaker 1: What day of the month is it?' he said, turning
• 1:16:29
  Speaker 1: to Alice. He had taken his watch out of his
• 1:16:32
  Speaker 1: pocket and was looking at it uneasily, shaking it every
• 1:16:35
  Speaker 1: now and then and holding it to his ear. Alice
• 1:16:39
  Speaker 1: considered a little and then said,' The fourth.'' Two days wrong,'
• 1:16:44
  Speaker 1: sighed the Hatter.' I told you butter would not suit
• 1:16:47
  Speaker 1: the works,' he added, looking angrily at the March Hare.'
• 1:16:50
  Speaker 1: It was the best butter,' the March Hare meekly replied.' Yes,
• 1:16:55
  Speaker 1: but some crumbs must have got in as well, the
• 1:16:57
  Speaker 1: Hatter grumbled. You shouldn't have put it in with the
• 1:16:59
  Speaker 1: bread knife. The March Hare took the watch and looked
• 1:17:03
  Speaker 1: at it gloomily. Then he dipped it into his cup
• 1:17:06
  Speaker 1: of tea and looked at it again, but he could
• 1:17:09
  Speaker 1: think of nothing better to say than his first remark,
• 1:17:12
  Speaker 1: It was the best butter, you know. Alice had been
• 1:17:15
  Speaker 1: looking over his shoulder with some curiosity. What a funny watch,
• 1:17:20
  Speaker 1: she remarked. It tells the day of the month and
• 1:17:22
  Speaker 1: doesn't tell what o'clock it is. Why shouldn't it, muttered
• 1:17:26
  Speaker 1: the Hatter. Does your watch tell you what year it is?
• 1:17:30
  Speaker 1: Of course not, Alice replied very readily. But that's because
• 1:17:34
  Speaker 1: it stays the same year for such a long time together.
• 1:17:38
  Speaker 1: Which is just the case with mine, said the Hatter.
• 1:17:42
  Speaker 1: Alice felt dreadfully puzzled. The Hatter's remark seemed to have
• 1:17:46
  Speaker 1: no meaning in it, and yet it was certainly English.
• 1:17:50
  Speaker 1: I don't quite understand, she said as politely as she could.
• 1:17:54
  Speaker 1: The Dormouse is asleep again, said the Hatter, and he
• 1:17:57
  Speaker 1: poured a little hot tea upon its nose. The Dormouse
• 1:18:01
  Speaker 1: shook its head impatiently, and said without opening its eyes,
• 1:18:04
  Speaker 1: Of course, of course, just what I was going to
• 1:18:08
  Speaker 1: remark myself. Have you guessed the riddle yet? the Hatter said,
• 1:18:12
  Speaker 1: turning to Alice again. No, I give it up, Alice replied.
• 1:18:15
  Speaker 1: What's the answer? I haven't the slightest idea, said the Hatter.
• 1:18:20
  Speaker 1: Nor I, said the March Hare. Alice sighed wearily. I
• 1:18:26
  Speaker 1: think you might do something better with the time, she said,
• 1:18:29
  Speaker 1: than wasting it asking riddles with no answers. If you
• 1:18:33
  Speaker 1: knew time as well as I do, said the Hatter,
• 1:18:36
  Speaker 1: you wouldn't talk about wasting it. It's him. I don't
• 1:18:41
  Speaker 1: know what you mean, said Alice. Of course you don't,
• 1:18:45
  Speaker 1: the Hatter said, tossing his head contemptuously. I dare say
• 1:18:49
  Speaker 1: you never spoke to time. Perhaps not, Alice cautiously replied.
• 1:18:54
  Speaker 1: But I know I have to beat time when I
• 1:18:56
  Speaker 1: learn music. Ah, that accounts for it, said the Hatter.
• 1:19:00
  Speaker 1: He won't stand beating. Now, if you only kept on
• 1:19:04
  Speaker 1: good terms with him, he'd do almost anything you liked
• 1:19:07
  Speaker 1: with the clock. For instance, suppose it were nine o'clock
• 1:19:10
  Speaker 1: in the morning, just time to begin lessons, you'd only
• 1:19:13
  Speaker 1: have to whisper a hint to time, and round goes
• 1:19:16
  Speaker 1: the clock in a twinkling. Half-past one, time for dinner!''
• 1:19:19
  Speaker 1: I only wish it was,' the March Hare said to
• 1:19:24
  Speaker 1: itself in a whisper.' That would be grand certainly,' said
• 1:19:28
  Speaker 1: Alice thoughtfully.' But then I shouldn't be hungry for it,
• 1:19:31
  Speaker 1: you know.' Not at first, perhaps, said the Hatter, but
• 1:19:36
  Speaker 1: you could keep it to half-past one as long as
• 1:19:38
  Speaker 1: you liked. Is that the way you manage? Alice asked.
• 1:19:43
  Speaker 1: The Hatter shook his head mournfully. Not I, he replied.
• 1:19:48
  Speaker 1: We quarreled last month, just before he went mad, you know,
• 1:19:51
  Speaker 1: pointing with his teaspoon to the March Hare. It was
• 1:19:55
  Speaker 1: at the great concert given by the Queen of Hearts,
• 1:19:57
  Speaker 1: and I had to sing. Twinkle, twinkle, little bat, How
• 1:20:02
  Speaker 1: I wonder what you're at. You know that song, perhaps?
• 1:20:07
  Speaker 1: I've heard something like it, said Alice. It goes on,
• 1:20:10
  Speaker 1: you know, the Hatter continued, in this way. Up above
• 1:20:14
  Speaker 1: the world you fly, like a tea-tray in the sky. Twinkle, twinkle.
• 1:20:21
  Speaker 1: Here the Dormouse shook itself and began singing in its sleep.
• 1:20:25
  Speaker 2: Twinkle, twinkle, twinkle, twinkle.
• 1:20:29
  Speaker 1: And went on so long that they had to pinch
• 1:20:31
  Speaker 1: it to make it stop. Well, I'd hardly finished the
• 1:20:35
  Speaker 1: first verse, said the Hatter, when the Queen jumped up
• 1:20:38
  Speaker 1: and bawled out, He's murdering the time! Off with his head!
• 1:20:43
  Speaker 1: How dreadfully savage! exclaimed Alice. And ever since that, the
• 1:20:48
  Speaker 1: Hatter went on in a mournful tone, He won't do
• 1:20:51
  Speaker 1: a thing, I ask. It's always six o'clock now. A
• 1:20:56
  Speaker 1: bright idea came into Alice's head. Is that the reason
• 1:21:00
  Speaker 1: so many tea things are put out here? she asked. Yes,
• 1:21:04
  Speaker 1: that's it, said the Hatter with a sigh. It's always
• 1:21:07
  Speaker 1: tea time, and we've no time to wash the things
• 1:21:10
  Speaker 1: between wiles. Then you keep moving round, I suppose, said Alice.
• 1:21:15
  Speaker 1: Exactly so, said the Hatter, as the things get used up.
• 1:21:19
  Speaker 1: But what happens when you come to the beginning again,
• 1:21:21
  Speaker 1: Alice ventured to ask. Suppose we change the subject, the
• 1:21:26
  Speaker 1: March Hare interrupted, yawning. I'm getting tired of this. I
• 1:21:31
  Speaker 1: vote the young lady tells us a story. I'm afraid
• 1:21:36
  Speaker 1: I don't know one, said Alice, rather alarmed at the proposal.
• 1:21:40
  Speaker 1: Then the Dormouse shall, they both cried. Wake up, Dormouse!
• 1:21:44
  Speaker 1: And they pinched it on both sides at once. The
• 1:21:47
  Speaker 1: Dormouse slowly opened his eyes. I wasn't asleep, he said
• 1:21:52
  Speaker 1: in a hoarse, feeble voice. I heard every word you
• 1:21:55
  Speaker 1: fellows were saying. Tell us a story, said the March Hare. Yes,
• 1:22:00
  Speaker 1: please do, pleaded Alice. And be quick about it, added
• 1:22:03
  Speaker 1: the Hatter, or you'll be asleep again before it's done.
• 1:22:07
  Speaker 1: Once upon a time there were three little sisters, the
• 1:22:10
  Speaker 1: Dormouse began in a great hurry, and their names were Elsie, Lacey,
• 1:22:14
  Speaker 1: and Tilly, and they lived at the bottom of a well.
• 1:22:17
  Speaker 1: What did they live on, said Alice, who always took
• 1:22:20
  Speaker 1: a great interest in questions of eating and drinking? They
• 1:22:25
  Speaker 1: lived on treacle, said the Dormouse, after thinking a minute
• 1:22:28
  Speaker 1: or two. They couldn't have done that, you know, Alice
• 1:22:31
  Speaker 1: gently remarked. They'd have been ill. So they were, said
• 1:22:35
  Speaker 1: the Dormouse, very ill. Alice tried a little to fancy
• 1:22:39
  Speaker 1: to herself what such an extraordinary way of living would
• 1:22:42
  Speaker 1: be like, but it puzzled her too much, so she
• 1:22:45
  Speaker 1: went on. But why did they live at the bottom
• 1:22:48
  Speaker 1: of a well? Take some more tea, the March Hare
• 1:22:51
  Speaker 1: said to Alice very earnestly. I've had nothing yet, Alice
• 1:22:55
  Speaker 1: replied in an offended tone, so I can't take more.
• 1:22:59
  Speaker 1: You mean you can't take less, said the Hatter. It's
• 1:23:03
  Speaker 1: very easy to take more than nothing. Nobody asked your opinion,
• 1:23:08
  Speaker 1: said Alice. Who's making personal remarks now, the Hatter asked triumphantly.
• 1:23:14
  Speaker 1: Alice did not quite know what to say to this,
• 1:23:17
  Speaker 1: so she helped herself to some tea and bread and butter,
• 1:23:20
  Speaker 1: and then turned to the Dormouse and repeated her question.
• 1:23:23
  Speaker 1: Why did they live at the bottom of a well?
• 1:23:26
  Speaker 1: The Dormouse again took a minute or two to think
• 1:23:29
  Speaker 1: about it. and then said, It was a treacle well.
• 1:23:33
  Speaker 1: There's no such thing, Alice was beginning very angrily, but
• 1:23:37
  Speaker 1: the Hatter and the March Hare went shh, and the
• 1:23:41
  Speaker 1: Dormouse sulkily remarked, If you can't be civil, you'd better
• 1:23:45
  Speaker 1: finish the story for yourself. No, please go on, Alice
• 1:23:50
  Speaker 1: said very humbly. I won't interrupt you again. I dare
• 1:23:53
  Speaker 1: say there may be one. One, indeed, said the Dormouse indignantly. However,
• 1:23:59
  Speaker 1: he consented to go on. And so these three little sisters,
• 1:24:03
  Speaker 1: they were learning to draw, you know. What did they draw,
• 1:24:07
  Speaker 1: said Alice, quite forgetting her promise. Treacle, said the Dormouse,
• 1:24:11
  Speaker 1: without considering at all this time. I want a clean cup,
• 1:24:15
  Speaker 1: interrupted the Hatter. Let's all move one place on. He
• 1:24:19
  Speaker 1: moved as he spoke, and the Dormouse followed him, the
• 1:24:22
  Speaker 1: March Hare moved into the Dormouse's place, and Alice rather
• 1:24:25
  Speaker 1: unwillingly took the place of the March Hare. The Hatter
• 1:24:28
  Speaker 1: was the only one who got any advantage from the change,
• 1:24:32
  Speaker 1: and Alice was a good deal worse off than before,
• 1:24:34
  Speaker 1: as the March Hare had just upset the milk-jug into
• 1:24:37
  Speaker 1: his plate. Alice did not wish to offend the Dormouse again,
• 1:24:41
  Speaker 1: so she began very cautiously, But I don't understand. Where
• 1:24:45
  Speaker 1: did they draw the treacle from? You can draw water
• 1:24:49
  Speaker 1: out of a water well, said the Hatter, so I
• 1:24:51
  Speaker 1: should think you could draw treacle out of a treacle well, eh, stupid?
• 1:24:55
  Speaker 1: But they were in the well, Alice said to the Dormouse,
• 1:24:58
  Speaker 1: not choosing to notice this last remark. Of course they were,
• 1:25:03
  Speaker 1: said the Dormouse, well in. This answer so confused poor
• 1:25:07
  Speaker 1: Alice that she let the Dormouse go on for some
• 1:25:09
  Speaker 1: time without interrupting it. They were learning to draw, the
• 1:25:14
  Speaker 1: Dormouse went on, yawning and rubbing its eyes, for it
• 1:25:17
  Speaker 1: was getting very sleepy, and they drew all manner of things,
• 1:25:21
  Speaker 1: everything that begins with an M. Why with an M?
• 1:25:26
  Speaker 1: said Alice. Why not? said the March Hare. Alice was silent.
• 1:25:31
  Speaker 1: The Dormouse had closed its eyes by this time, and
• 1:25:34
  Speaker 1: was going off into a doze, but on being pinched
• 1:25:37
  Speaker 1: by the Hatter, it woke up again with a little shriek,
• 1:25:40
  Speaker 1: and went on. that begins with an M, such as
• 1:25:44
  Speaker 1: mousetraps and the moon, and memory and muchness. You know
• 1:25:49
  Speaker 1: you say things are much of a muchness. Did you
• 1:25:52
  Speaker 1: ever see such a thing as a drawing of a muchness?'' Really?
• 1:25:56
  Speaker 1: Now you ask me,' said Alice, very much confused.' I
• 1:25:59
  Speaker 1: don't think—'' Then you shouldn't talk,' said the Hatter. This
• 1:26:04
  Speaker 1: piece of rudeness was more than Alice could bear. She
• 1:26:07
  Speaker 1: got up in great disgust and walked off. The Dormouse
• 1:26:10
  Speaker 1: fell asleep instantly, and neither of the others took the
• 1:26:13
  Speaker 1: least notice of her going, though she looked back once
• 1:26:16
  Speaker 1: or twice, half hoping that they would call after her.
• 1:26:19
  Speaker 1: The last time she saw them, they were trying to
• 1:26:22
  Speaker 1: put the Dormouse into the teapot. At any rate, I'll
• 1:26:25
  Speaker 1: never go there again, said Alice as she picked her
• 1:26:28
  Speaker 1: way through the wood. It's the stupidest teapotty I ever
• 1:26:31
  Speaker 1: was at in all my life. Just as she said this,
• 1:26:35
  Speaker 1: she noticed that one of the trees had a door
• 1:26:37
  Speaker 1: leading right into it. That's very curious, she thought, but
• 1:26:40
  Speaker 1: everything's curious today. I think I may as well go
• 1:26:44
  Speaker 1: in at once. And in she went. Once more she
• 1:26:47
  Speaker 1: found herself in the long hall, and close to the
• 1:26:50
  Speaker 1: little glass table. Now I'll manage better this time, she
• 1:26:54
  Speaker 1: said to herself, and began by taking the little golden
• 1:26:56
  Speaker 1: key and unlocking the door that led into the garden.
• 1:27:00
  Speaker 1: Then she set to work nibbling at the mushroom. She
• 1:27:02
  Speaker 1: had kept a piece of it in her pocket till
• 1:27:05
  Speaker 1: she was about a foot high. Then she walked down
• 1:27:08
  Speaker 1: the little passage, and then she found herself at last
• 1:27:11
  Speaker 1: in the beautiful garden among the bright flower beds and
• 1:27:14
  Speaker 1: the cool fountains. End of Chapter 7 Chapter 8 of
• 1:27:27
  Speaker 1: Alice's Adventures in Wonderland by Lewis Carroll. The Queen's Croquet
• 1:27:33
  Speaker 1: Ground A large rose tree stood near the entrance of
• 1:27:37
  Speaker 1: the garden. The roses growing on it were white, but
• 1:27:40
  Speaker 1: there were three gardeners at it busily painting them red.
• 1:27:44
  Speaker 1: Alice thought this a very curious thing, and she went
• 1:27:47
  Speaker 1: nearer to watch them, and just as she came up
• 1:27:49
  Speaker 1: to them she heard one of them say, Look out now, Five!
• 1:27:53
  Speaker 1: Don't go splashing paint over me like that! I couldn't
• 1:27:57
  Speaker 1: help it, said Five in a sulky tone. Seven jogged
• 1:28:00
  Speaker 1: my elbow, on which Seven looked up and said, That's right, Five,
• 1:28:05
  Speaker 1: always lay the blame on others. You'd better not talk,
• 1:28:10
  Speaker 1: said Five. I heard the Queen say only yesterday you
• 1:28:13
  Speaker 1: deserve to be beheaded. What for? said the one who
• 1:28:17
  Speaker 1: had first spoken. That's none of your business, too, said Seven. Yes,
• 1:28:24
  Speaker 1: it is his business, said Five, and I'll tell him.
• 1:28:27
  Speaker 1: It was for bringing the cook tulip roots instead of onions.
• 1:28:32
  Speaker 1: Seven flung down his brush and had just begun, well,
• 1:28:35
  Speaker 1: of all the unjust things, when his eye chanced to
• 1:28:38
  Speaker 1: fall upon Alice. as she stood watching them, and he
• 1:28:41
  Speaker 1: checked himself suddenly. The others looked around also, and all
• 1:28:45
  Speaker 1: of them bowed low. Would you tell me, said Alice,
• 1:28:48
  Speaker 1: a little timidly, why you are painting those roses? Five
• 1:28:53
  Speaker 1: and Seven said nothing, but looked at Two. Two began
• 1:28:56
  Speaker 1: in a low voice, Why, the fact is, you see, miss,
• 1:29:00
  Speaker 1: this here ought to have been a red rose tree,
• 1:29:02
  Speaker 1: and we put a white one in by mistake. And
• 1:29:05
  Speaker 1: if the queen was to find out, we should all
• 1:29:07
  Speaker 1: have our heads cut off, you know. So you see, miss,
• 1:29:10
  Speaker 1: we're doing our best afore she comes, to—' At this moment,
• 1:29:14
  Speaker 1: five who had been anxiously looking across the garden called out,'
• 1:29:17
  Speaker 1: The queen! The queen!' And the three gardeners instantly threw
• 1:29:21
  Speaker 1: themselves flat upon their faces. There was a sound of
• 1:29:25
  Speaker 1: many footsteps, and Alice looked round, eager to see the queen.
• 1:29:29
  Speaker 1: First came ten soldiers carrying clubs. These were all shaped
• 1:29:33
  Speaker 1: like the three gardeners, oblong and flat, with their hands
• 1:29:36
  Speaker 1: and feet at the corners. Next, the ten courtiers. These
• 1:29:40
  Speaker 1: were ornamented all over with diamonds, and walked two and two,
• 1:29:43
  Speaker 1: as the soldiers did. After these came the royal children.
• 1:29:47
  Speaker 1: There were ten of them, and the little deers came
• 1:29:49
  Speaker 1: jumping merrily along hand in hand in couples. They were
• 1:29:53
  Speaker 1: all ornamented with hearts. Next came the guests, mostly kings
• 1:29:57
  Speaker 1: and queens, and among them Alice recognized the white rabbit.
• 1:30:01
  Speaker 1: It was talking in a hurried, nervous manner, smiling at
• 1:30:04
  Speaker 1: everything that was said, and went by without noticing her.
• 1:30:07
  Speaker 1: Then followed the knave of hearts, carrying the king's crown
• 1:30:10
  Speaker 1: on a crimson velvet cushion, and last of all this
• 1:30:13
  Speaker 1: grand procession came the king and queen of hearts. Alice
• 1:30:17
  Speaker 1: was rather doubtful whether she ought not to lie down
• 1:30:19
  Speaker 1: on her face like the three gardeners, but she could
• 1:30:22
  Speaker 1: not remember ever having heard of such a rule at processions.
• 1:30:26
  Speaker 1: And besides, what would be the use of a procession,
• 1:30:28
  Speaker 1: thought she, if people had to lie down upon their faces,
• 1:30:31
  Speaker 1: so that they couldn't see it? So she stood still
• 1:30:34
  Speaker 1: where she was, and waited. When the procession came opposite
• 1:30:38
  Speaker 1: to Alice, they all stopped and looked at her, and
• 1:30:41
  Speaker 1: the queen said severely, Who is this? She said it
• 1:30:45
  Speaker 1: to the knave of hearts, who only bowed and smiled
• 1:30:47
  Speaker 1: in reply. Idiot! said the queen, tossing her head impatiently.
• 1:30:52
  Speaker 1: And turning to Alice, she went on.' What' s your name, child?''
• 1:30:56
  Speaker 1: My name is Alice, so please your majesty,' said Alice
• 1:31:01
  Speaker 1: very politely. But she added to herself,' Why, they're only
• 1:31:04
  Speaker 1: a pack of cards, after all. I needn't be afraid
• 1:31:07
  Speaker 1: of them.'' And who are these?' said the queen, pointing
• 1:31:12
  Speaker 1: to the three gardeners who were lying round the rose-tree.
• 1:31:15
  Speaker 1: For you see, as they were lying on their faces,
• 1:31:17
  Speaker 1: and the pattern on their backs was the same as
• 1:31:19
  Speaker 1: the rest of the pack, she could not tell whether
• 1:31:21
  Speaker 1: they were gardeners, or soldiers, or courtiers, or three of
• 1:31:25
  Speaker 1: her own children. How should I know? said Alice, surprised
• 1:31:28
  Speaker 1: at her own courage. It's no business of mine. The
• 1:31:31
  Speaker 1: queen turned crimson with fury, and after glaring at her
• 1:31:34
  Speaker 1: for a moment like a wild beast, screamed, Off with
• 1:31:38
  Speaker 1: her head! Off! Nonsense! said Alice very loudly and decidedly,
• 1:31:43
  Speaker 1: and the queen was silent. The king laid his hand
• 1:31:46
  Speaker 1: upon her arm and timidly said, Consider, my dear, she
• 1:31:50
  Speaker 1: is only a child. The queen turned angrily away from
• 1:31:53
  Speaker 1: him and said to the knave, Turn them over! The
• 1:31:57
  Speaker 1: knave did so very carefully with one foot.
• 1:32:01
  Speaker 2: Get up!
• 1:32:02
  Speaker 1: Said the queen in a shrill, loud voice, and the
• 1:32:04
  Speaker 1: three gardeners instantly jumped up and began bowing to the king,
• 1:32:08
  Speaker 1: the queen, the royal children, and everybody else. Leave off that!
• 1:32:13
  Speaker 1: screamed the queen. You make me giddy! And then, turning
• 1:32:17
  Speaker 1: to the rose-tree, she went on, What have you been
• 1:32:20
  Speaker 1: doing here? May it please your majesty, said two, in
• 1:32:23
  Speaker 1: a very humble tone, going down on one knee as
• 1:32:25
  Speaker 1: he spoke. We were trying. I see, said the queen,
• 1:32:30
  Speaker 1: who had meanwhile been examining the roses. Off with their heads!
• 1:32:35
  Speaker 1: And the procession moved on, three of the soldiers remaining
• 1:32:38
  Speaker 1: behind to execute the unfortunate gardeners, who ran to Alice
• 1:32:41
  Speaker 1: for protections. You shan't be perheaded, said Alice, and she
• 1:32:46
  Speaker 1: put them into a large flowerpot that stood near. The
• 1:32:49
  Speaker 1: three soldiers wandered about for a minute or two, looking
• 1:32:52
  Speaker 1: for them, and then quietly marched off after the others.
• 1:32:56
  Speaker 1: Are their heads off? shouted the queen. Their heads are gone,
• 1:32:59
  Speaker 1: if it please your majesty, the soldiers shouted in reply.
• 1:33:03
  Speaker 1: That's right, shouted the queen. Can you play croquet? The
• 1:33:08
  Speaker 1: soldiers were silent and looked at Alice, as the question
• 1:33:11
  Speaker 1: was evidently meant for her. Yes, shouted Alice. Come on, then,
• 1:33:17
  Speaker 1: roared the queen, and Alice joined the procession, wondering very
• 1:33:20
  Speaker 1: much what would happen next. It's a very fine day,
• 1:33:25
  Speaker 1: said a timid voice at her side. She was walking
• 1:33:27
  Speaker 1: by the white rabbit, who was peeping anxiously into her face. Very,
• 1:33:32
  Speaker 1: said Alice. Where is the duchess? Hush, hush, said the
• 1:33:37
  Speaker 1: rabbit in a low, hurried tone. He looked anxiously over
• 1:33:40
  Speaker 1: his shoulder as he spoke, and then raised himself upon tiptoe,
• 1:33:44
  Speaker 1: put his mouth close to her ear, and whispered, She's
• 1:33:47
  Speaker 1: under sentence of execution. What for? said Alice. Did you
• 1:33:52
  Speaker 1: say what a pity? the rabbit asked. No, I didn't,
• 1:33:55
  Speaker 1: said Alice. I don't think it's at all a pity.
• 1:33:58
  Speaker 1: I said what for? She boxed the queen's ears, the
• 1:34:02
  Speaker 1: rabbit began. Alice gave a little scream of laughter. Oh, hush,
• 1:34:06
  Speaker 1: the rabbit whispered in a frightened tone. The queen will
• 1:34:09
  Speaker 1: hear you. You see, she came rather late, and the
• 1:34:12
  Speaker 1: queen said, Get to your places, shouted the queen in
• 1:34:16
  Speaker 1: a voice of thunder, and people began running about in
• 1:34:18
  Speaker 1: all directions, tumbling up against each other. However, they got
• 1:34:22
  Speaker 1: settled down in a minute or two, and the game began.
• 1:34:26
  Speaker 1: Alice thought she had never seen such a curious croquet
• 1:34:28
  Speaker 1: ground in all her life. It was all ridges and furrows.
• 1:34:32
  Speaker 1: The balls were live hedgehogs, the mallets live flamingos, and
• 1:34:36
  Speaker 1: the soldiers had to double themselves up and to stand
• 1:34:38
  Speaker 1: upon their hands and feet to make the arches. The
• 1:34:41
  Speaker 1: chief difficulty Alice found at first was in managing her flamingo.
• 1:34:45
  Speaker 1: She succeeded in getting its body tucked away, comfortably enough,
• 1:34:49
  Speaker 1: under her arm, with its legs hanging down, but generally,
• 1:34:52
  Speaker 1: just as she had got its neck nicely straightened out
• 1:34:55
  Speaker 1: and was going to give the hedgehog a blow with
• 1:34:57
  Speaker 1: its head, it would twist itself round and look up
• 1:35:00
  Speaker 1: in her face, with such a puzzled expression that she
• 1:35:03
  Speaker 1: could not help bursting out laughing. And when she had
• 1:35:06
  Speaker 1: got its head down and was going to begin again,
• 1:35:08
  Speaker 1: it was very provoking to find that the hedgehog had
• 1:35:11
  Speaker 1: unrolled itself and was in the act of crawling away.
• 1:35:14
  Speaker 1: Besides all this, there was generally a ridge or a
• 1:35:17
  Speaker 1: furrow in the way wherever she wanted to send the
• 1:35:19
  Speaker 1: hedgehog to, and as the doubled-up soldiers were always getting
• 1:35:22
  Speaker 1: up and walking off to other parts of the ground,
• 1:35:25
  Speaker 1: Alice soon came to the conclusion that it was a
• 1:35:27
  Speaker 1: very difficult game indeed. The players all played at once
• 1:35:31
  Speaker 1: without waiting for turns, quarreling all the while and fighting
• 1:35:34
  Speaker 1: for the hedgehogs, and in a very short time the
• 1:35:37
  Speaker 1: queen was in a furious passion and went stamping about
• 1:35:40
  Speaker 1: and shouting, Off with his head! or Off with her head!
• 1:35:44
  Speaker 1: about once in a minute. Alice began to feel very uneasy.
• 1:35:48
  Speaker 1: To be sure, she had not as yet had any
• 1:35:50
  Speaker 1: dispute with the queen, but she knew that it might
• 1:35:53
  Speaker 1: happen any minute. And then, thought she, what would become
• 1:35:56
  Speaker 1: of me? They're dreadfully fond of beheading people here. The
• 1:36:00
  Speaker 1: great wonder is that there's anyone left alive. She was
• 1:36:03
  Speaker 1: looking about for some way of escape, and wondering whether
• 1:36:06
  Speaker 1: she could get away without being seen, when she noticed
• 1:36:10
  Speaker 1: a curious appearance in the air. It puzzled her very
• 1:36:13
  Speaker 1: much at first, but after watching it a minute or two,
• 1:36:16
  Speaker 1: she made it out to be a grin, and she
• 1:36:18
  Speaker 1: said to herself, It's the Cheshire Cat. Now I shall
• 1:36:21
  Speaker 1: have somebody to talk to. How are you getting on?
• 1:36:25
  Speaker 1: said the cat, as soon as there was mouth enough
• 1:36:27
  Speaker 1: for it to speak with. Alice waited till the eyes
• 1:36:31
  Speaker 1: had appeared, and then nodded. It's no use speaking to it,
• 1:36:34
  Speaker 1: she thought, until its ears have come, or at least
• 1:36:37
  Speaker 1: one of them. In another minute the whole head appeared,
• 1:36:40
  Speaker 1: and then Alice put down her flamingo and began an
• 1:36:42
  Speaker 1: account of the game, feeling very glad she had someone
• 1:36:45
  Speaker 1: to listen to her. The cat seemed to think that
• 1:36:48
  Speaker 1: there was enough of it now in sight, and no
• 1:36:50
  Speaker 1: more of it appeared. I don't think they play at
• 1:36:53
  Speaker 1: all fairly, Alice began in a rather complaining tone. and
• 1:36:57
  Speaker 1: they all quarrel so dreadfully one can't hear oneself speak,
• 1:37:01
  Speaker 1: and they don't seem to have any rules in particular.
• 1:37:03
  Speaker 1: At least, if there are, nobody attends to them. And
• 1:37:06
  Speaker 1: you've no idea how confusing it is, all the things
• 1:37:09
  Speaker 1: being alive. For instance, there's the arch I've got to
• 1:37:12
  Speaker 1: go through next, walking about at the other end of
• 1:37:14
  Speaker 1: the ground. And I should have croqueted the queen's hedgehog
• 1:37:17
  Speaker 1: just now, only it ran away when it saw mine coming.
• 1:37:20
  Speaker 1: How do you like the queen? said the cat in
• 1:37:23
  Speaker 1: a low voice. Not at all, said Alice. She's so
• 1:37:27
  Speaker 1: extremely—' Just then she noticed that the queen was close
• 1:37:31
  Speaker 1: behind her listening, so she went on,' Likely to win,
• 1:37:34
  Speaker 1: that it's hardly worthwhile finishing the game.' The queen smiled
• 1:37:39
  Speaker 1: and passed on.' Who are you talking to?' said the king,
• 1:37:43
  Speaker 1: coming up to Alice, and looking at the cat's head
• 1:37:45
  Speaker 1: with great curiosity.' It' s a friend of mine, a Cheshire cat,'
• 1:37:49
  Speaker 1: said Alice.' Allow me to introduce it.'' I don't like
• 1:37:53
  Speaker 1: the look of it at all,' said the king.' However,
• 1:37:55
  Speaker 1: it may kiss my hand if it likes. I'd rather not,
• 1:38:00
  Speaker 1: the cat remarked. Don't be impertinent, said the king, and
• 1:38:04
  Speaker 1: don't look at me like that. He got behind Alice
• 1:38:07
  Speaker 1: as he spoke. A cat may look at a king,
• 1:38:09
  Speaker 1: said Alice. I've read that in some book, but I
• 1:38:12
  Speaker 1: don't remember where. Well, it must be removed, said the
• 1:38:16
  Speaker 1: king very decidedly, and he called to the queen, who
• 1:38:19
  Speaker 1: was passing at the moment. My dear, I wish you
• 1:38:21
  Speaker 1: would have this cat removed. the Queen had only one
• 1:38:25
  Speaker 1: way of settling all difficulties, great or small.' Off with
• 1:38:28
  Speaker 1: his head!' she said. without even looking round. I'll fetch
• 1:38:33
  Speaker 1: the executioner myself, said the king eagerly, and he hurried off.
• 1:38:37
  Speaker 1: Alice thought she might as well go back and see
• 1:38:39
  Speaker 1: how the game was going on, as she heard the
• 1:38:41
  Speaker 1: queen's voice in the distance screaming with passion. She had
• 1:38:45
  Speaker 1: already heard her sentence three of the players to be
• 1:38:47
  Speaker 1: executed for having missed their turns, and she did not
• 1:38:50
  Speaker 1: like the look of things at all, as the game
• 1:38:52
  Speaker 1: was in such confusion that she never knew whether it
• 1:38:54
  Speaker 1: was her turn or not. So she went in search
• 1:38:57
  Speaker 1: of her hedgehog. The hedgehog was engaged in a fight
• 1:39:01
  Speaker 1: with another hedgehog, which seemed to Alice an excellent opportunity
• 1:39:04
  Speaker 1: for croqueting one of them with the other. The only
• 1:39:07
  Speaker 1: difficulty was that her flamingo was gone across to the
• 1:39:10
  Speaker 1: other side of the garden, where Alice could see it trying,
• 1:39:13
  Speaker 1: in a helpless sort of way, to fly up into
• 1:39:15
  Speaker 1: one of the trees. By the time she had caught
• 1:39:18
  Speaker 1: the flamingo and brought it back, the fight was over,
• 1:39:21
  Speaker 1: and both the hedgehogs were out of sight. But it
• 1:39:23
  Speaker 1: doesn't matter much, thought Alice, as all the archers are
• 1:39:26
  Speaker 1: gone from this side of the ground. So she tucked
• 1:39:29
  Speaker 1: it under her arm, that it might not escape again,
• 1:39:31
  Speaker 1: and went back for a little more conversation with her friend.
• 1:39:34
  Speaker 1: When she got back to the Cheshire Cat, she was
• 1:39:37
  Speaker 1: surprised to find quite a large crowd collected round it.
• 1:39:40
  Speaker 1: There was a dispute going on between the executioner, the king,
• 1:39:43
  Speaker 1: and the queen. who were all talking at once, while
• 1:39:46
  Speaker 1: all the rest were quite silent, and looked very uncomfortable.
• 1:39:50
  Speaker 1: The moment Alice appeared, she was appealed to by all
• 1:39:53
  Speaker 1: three to settle the question, and they repeated their arguments
• 1:39:55
  Speaker 1: to her, though, as they all spoke at once, she
• 1:39:58
  Speaker 1: found it very hard indeed to make out exactly what
• 1:40:01
  Speaker 1: they said. The executioner's argument was that you couldn't cut
• 1:40:06
  Speaker 1: off a head unless there was a body to cut
• 1:40:08
  Speaker 1: it off from, that he had never had to do
• 1:40:10
  Speaker 1: such a thing before, and he wasn't going to begin
• 1:40:13
  Speaker 1: at his time of life. The king's argument was that
• 1:40:16
  Speaker 1: anything that had a head could be beheaded, and that
• 1:40:19
  Speaker 1: you weren't to talk nonsense. The queen's argument was that
• 1:40:23
  Speaker 1: if something wasn't done about it in less than no time,
• 1:40:26
  Speaker 1: she'd have everybody executed all round. It was this last
• 1:40:30
  Speaker 1: remark that had made the whole party look so grave
• 1:40:32
  Speaker 1: and anxious. Alice could think of nothing else to say,
• 1:40:35
  Speaker 1: but it belongs to the duchess. You'd better ask her
• 1:40:38
  Speaker 1: about it. She's in prison, the queen said to the executioner.
• 1:40:43
  Speaker 1: Fetch her here. and the executioner went off like an arrow.
• 1:40:48
  Speaker 1: The cat's head began fading away the moment he was gone,
• 1:40:51
  Speaker 1: and by the time he had come back with the duchess,
• 1:40:54
  Speaker 1: it had entirely disappeared, so the king and the executioner
• 1:40:57
  Speaker 1: ran wildly up and down looking for it, while the
• 1:41:00
  Speaker 1: rest of the party went back to the game. End
• 1:41:05
  Speaker 1: of chapter 8 CHAPTER IX. You can't think how glad
• 1:41:27
  Speaker 1: I am to see you again, you dear old thing,
• 1:41:30
  Speaker 1: said the Duchess, as she tucked her arm affectionately into Alice's,
• 1:41:34
  Speaker 1: and they walked off together. Alice was very glad to
• 1:41:37
  Speaker 1: find her in such a pleasant temper. and thought to
• 1:41:39
  Speaker 1: herself that perhaps it was only the pepper that had
• 1:41:42
  Speaker 1: made her so savage when they met in the kitchen.'
• 1:41:44
  Speaker 1: When I'm a duchess,' she said to herself, not in
• 1:41:48
  Speaker 1: a very hopeful tone, though,' I won't have any pepper
• 1:41:51
  Speaker 1: in my kitchen at all. Soup does very well without.
• 1:41:55
  Speaker 1: Maybe it's always pepper that makes people hot-tempered,' she went on,
• 1:41:59
  Speaker 1: very much pleased at having found out a new kind
• 1:42:01
  Speaker 1: of rule,' and vinegar that makes them sour, and chamomile
• 1:42:05
  Speaker 1: that makes them bitter.' and barley sugar and such things
• 1:42:08
  Speaker 1: that make children sweet-tempered i only wish people knew that
• 1:42:12
  Speaker 1: then they wouldn't be so stingy about it you know
• 1:42:15
  Speaker 1: she had quite forgotten the duchess by this time and
• 1:42:18
  Speaker 1: was a little startled when she heard her voice close
• 1:42:21
  Speaker 1: to her ear you're thinking about something my dear and
• 1:42:24
  Speaker 1: that makes you forget to talk i can't tell you
• 1:42:27
  Speaker 1: just now what the moral of that is but i
• 1:42:30
  Speaker 1: shall remember it in a bit Perhaps it hasn't won,
• 1:42:33
  Speaker 1: Alice ventured to remark. Tut-tut, child, said the Duchess. Everything's
• 1:42:38
  Speaker 1: got a moral. If only you can find it. And
• 1:42:42
  Speaker 1: she squeezed herself up closer to Alice's side as she spoke.
• 1:42:46
  Speaker 1: Alice did not much like her keeping so close to her,
• 1:42:49
  Speaker 1: first because the Duchess was very ugly, and secondly because
• 1:42:53
  Speaker 1: she was exactly the right height to rest her chin
• 1:42:55
  Speaker 1: on Alice's shoulder, and it was an uncomfortably sharp chin. However,
• 1:43:00
  Speaker 1: she did not like to be rude, so she bore
• 1:43:02
  Speaker 1: it as well as she could. The game's going on
• 1:43:05
  Speaker 1: rather better now, she said by the way of keeping
• 1:43:07
  Speaker 1: up the conversation a little. Tis so, said the Duchess,
• 1:43:12
  Speaker 1: and the moral of that is, oh, tis love, tis
• 1:43:15
  Speaker 1: love that makes the world go round. Somebody said, Alice whispered,
• 1:43:20
  Speaker 1: that it's done by everybody minding their own business. Ah, well,
• 1:43:24
  Speaker 1: it means much the same thing. said the Duchess, digging
• 1:43:28
  Speaker 1: her sharp little chin into Alice's shoulder as she added,
• 1:43:31
  Speaker 1: And the moral of that is, take care of the scents,
• 1:43:34
  Speaker 1: and the sounds will take care of themselves. How fond
• 1:43:38
  Speaker 1: she is of finding morals in things, Alice thought to herself.
• 1:43:43
  Speaker 1: I dare say you're wondering why I don't put my
• 1:43:45
  Speaker 1: arm round your waist, the Duchess said after a pause.
• 1:43:49
  Speaker 1: The reason is that I'm doubtful about the temper of
• 1:43:52
  Speaker 1: your flamingo. Shall I try the experiment? He might bite,
• 1:43:58
  Speaker 1: Alice cautiously replied, not feeling at all anxious to have
• 1:44:01
  Speaker 1: the experiment tried. Very true, said the Duchess. Flamingos and
• 1:44:06
  Speaker 1: mustard both bite. And the moral of that is, birds
• 1:44:10
  Speaker 1: of a feather flock together. Only mustard isn't a bird,
• 1:44:15
  Speaker 1: Alice remarked. Right as usual, said the Duchess. What a
• 1:44:19
  Speaker 1: clever way you have of putting things. It's a mineral,
• 1:44:23
  Speaker 1: I think, said Alice. Of course it is. said the Duchess,
• 1:44:27
  Speaker 1: who seemed ready to agree to everything that Alice said.'
• 1:44:29
  Speaker 1: There' s a large mustard mine near here, and the moral
• 1:44:33
  Speaker 1: of that is, the more there is of mine, the
• 1:44:36
  Speaker 1: less there is of yours.'' Oh, I know,' exclaimed Alice,
• 1:44:40
  Speaker 1: who had not attended to this last remark.' It' s a vegetable.
• 1:44:43
  Speaker 1: It doesn't look like one, but it is.'' I quite
• 1:44:46
  Speaker 1: agree with you,' said the Duchess.' And the moral of
• 1:44:49
  Speaker 1: that is, Be what you would seem to be, or
• 1:44:53
  Speaker 1: if you'd like it put more simply, never imagine yourself
• 1:44:56
  Speaker 1: not to be otherwise than what it might appear to
• 1:44:59
  Speaker 1: others that what you were or might have been was
• 1:45:02
  Speaker 1: not otherwise than what you had been would have appeared
• 1:45:05
  Speaker 1: to them to be otherwise. I think I should understand
• 1:45:08
  Speaker 1: that better, Alice said very politely, if I had it
• 1:45:11
  Speaker 1: written down, but I can't quite follow it as you
• 1:45:14
  Speaker 1: say it. That's nothing to what I could say if
• 1:45:17
  Speaker 1: I chose, the Duchess replied in a pleased tone. Pray
• 1:45:21
  Speaker 1: don't trouble yourself to say it any longer than that,
• 1:45:23
  Speaker 1: said Alice. Oh, don't talk about trouble, said the Duchess.
• 1:45:27
  Speaker 1: I make you a present of everything I've said as yet.
• 1:45:31
  Speaker 1: A cheap sort of present, thought Alice. I'm glad they
• 1:45:34
  Speaker 1: don't give birthday presents like that. But she did not
• 1:45:37
  Speaker 1: venture to say it out loud. Thinking again, the Duchess
• 1:45:41
  Speaker 1: asked with another dig of her sharp little chin. I've
• 1:45:45
  Speaker 1: a right to think, said Alice sharply, for she was
• 1:45:47
  Speaker 1: beginning to feel a little worried.' Just about as much right,'
• 1:45:51
  Speaker 1: said the Duchess,' as pigs have to fly, and the—'
• 1:45:55
  Speaker 1: But here, to Alice's great surprise, the Duchess's voice died away,
• 1:45:59
  Speaker 1: even in the middle of her favored word, moral, and
• 1:46:02
  Speaker 1: the arm that was linked into hers began to tremble.
• 1:46:05
  Speaker 1: Alice looked up, and there stood the Queen in front
• 1:46:07
  Speaker 1: of them, with her arms folded, frowning like a thunderstorm.'
• 1:46:10
  Speaker 1: A fine day, Your Majesty,' the Duchess began in a low,
• 1:46:15
  Speaker 1: weak voice. Now I give you fair warning, shouted the queen,
• 1:46:20
  Speaker 1: stamping on the ground as she spoke. Either you or
• 1:46:24
  Speaker 1: your head must be off, and that in about half
• 1:46:26
  Speaker 1: no time. Take your choice. The duchess took her choice
• 1:46:31
  Speaker 1: and was gone in a moment. Let's go on with
• 1:46:34
  Speaker 1: the game, the queen said to Alice, and Alice was
• 1:46:37
  Speaker 1: too much frightened to say a word, but slowly followed
• 1:46:40
  Speaker 1: her back to the croquet ground. The other guests had
• 1:46:44
  Speaker 1: taken advantage of the queen's absence, and were resting in
• 1:46:47
  Speaker 1: the shade. However, the moment they saw her, they hurried
• 1:46:50
  Speaker 1: back to the game, the queen merely remarking that a
• 1:46:53
  Speaker 1: moment's delay would cost them their lives. All the time
• 1:46:56
  Speaker 1: they were playing, the queen never left off quarreling with
• 1:46:59
  Speaker 1: the other players, and shouting, Off with his head! Or,
• 1:47:03
  Speaker 1: Off with our head! Those whom she sentenced were taken
• 1:47:06
  Speaker 1: into custody by the soldiers, who of course had to
• 1:47:09
  Speaker 1: leave off being arches to do this, so that by
• 1:47:12
  Speaker 1: the end of half an hour or so there were
• 1:47:14
  Speaker 1: no arches left, and all the players, except the king,
• 1:47:17
  Speaker 1: the queen, and Alice, were in custody and under sentence
• 1:47:20
  Speaker 1: of execution. Then the queen left off, quite out of breath,
• 1:47:25
  Speaker 1: and said to Alice, Have you seen the mock turtle yet? No,
• 1:47:29
  Speaker 1: said Alice, I don't even know what a mock turtle is.
• 1:47:34
  Speaker 1: It's the thing mock turtle soup is made from, said
• 1:47:37
  Speaker 1: the queen. I never saw one, or heard of one,
• 1:47:40
  Speaker 1: said Alice. Come on, then, said the queen, and he
• 1:47:44
  Speaker 1: shall tell you his history. As they walked off together,
• 1:47:48
  Speaker 1: Alice heard the king say in a low voice to
• 1:47:50
  Speaker 1: the company generally, You're all pardoned. Come, that's a good thing,
• 1:47:55
  Speaker 1: she said to herself, for she had felt quite unhappy
• 1:47:58
  Speaker 1: at the number of executions the queen had ordered. The
• 1:48:02
  Speaker 1: very soon came upon a griffin lying fast asleep in
• 1:48:05
  Speaker 1: the sun. If you don't know what a griffin is,
• 1:48:07
  Speaker 1: look at the picture.' Up, lazy thing,' said the queen,'
• 1:48:11
  Speaker 1: and take this young lady to see the mock-turtle, and
• 1:48:14
  Speaker 1: to hear his history. I must go back and see
• 1:48:17
  Speaker 1: after some executions I have ordered.' And she walked off,
• 1:48:20
  Speaker 1: leaving Alice alone with the griffin. Alice did not quite
• 1:48:24
  Speaker 1: like the look of the creature, but on the whole
• 1:48:26
  Speaker 1: she thought it would be quite as safe to stay
• 1:48:27
  Speaker 1: with it as to go after that savage queen. So
• 1:48:30
  Speaker 1: she waited. The griffin sat up and rubbed its eyes.
• 1:48:34
  Speaker 1: Then it watched the queen till she was out of sight.
• 1:48:36
  Speaker 1: Then it chuckled.' What fun!' said the griffon, half to itself,
• 1:48:40
  Speaker 1: half to Alice. What is the fun? said Alice. Why, she,
• 1:48:44
  Speaker 1: said the griffon, it's all her fancy that. They never
• 1:48:47
  Speaker 1: executes nobody, you know.
• 1:48:48
  Speaker 2: Come on.
• 1:48:50
  Speaker 1: Everybody says come on here, thought Alice, as she went
• 1:48:53
  Speaker 1: slowly after it. I never was so ordered about in
• 1:48:56
  Speaker 1: my life, never. They had not gone so far before
• 1:49:00
  Speaker 1: they saw the mock turtle in the distance, sitting sad
• 1:49:03
  Speaker 1: and lonely on a little ledge of a rock, and
• 1:49:06
  Speaker 1: as they came nearer, Alice could hear him sighing as
• 1:49:09
  Speaker 1: if his heart would break. She pitied him deeply. What
• 1:49:13
  Speaker 1: is his sorrow? she asked the griffin, and the griffin
• 1:49:15
  Speaker 1: answered very nearly in the same words as before. It's
• 1:49:18
  Speaker 1: all his fancy, that. He hasn't got no sorrow, you know.
• 1:49:21
  Speaker 1: Come on. So they went up to the mock turtle,
• 1:49:25
  Speaker 1: who looked at them with large eyes full of tears,
• 1:49:27
  Speaker 1: but said nothing. This here young lady, said the griffin,
• 1:49:31
  Speaker 1: she wants to know your history, she do. I'll tell
• 1:49:35
  Speaker 1: it her, said the Mock Turtle in a deep hollow tone.
• 1:49:39
  Speaker 1: Sit down, both of you, and don't speak a word
• 1:49:42
  Speaker 1: till I've finished. So they sat down, and nobody spoke
• 1:49:46
  Speaker 1: for some minutes. Alice thought to herself, I don't see
• 1:49:49
  Speaker 1: how he can ever finish if he doesn't begin. But
• 1:49:52
  Speaker 1: she waited patiently. Once, said the Mock Turtle at last
• 1:49:57
  Speaker 1: with a deep sigh, I was a real turtle. These
• 1:50:01
  Speaker 1: words were followed by a very long silence, broken only
• 1:50:04
  Speaker 1: by an occasional exclamation of, from the griffin, and the
• 1:50:09
  Speaker 1: constant heavy sobbing of the Mock Turtle. Alice was very
• 1:50:13
  Speaker 1: nearly getting up and saying, Thank you, sir, for your
• 1:50:16
  Speaker 1: interesting story. But she could not help thinking there must
• 1:50:19
  Speaker 1: be more to come, so she sat still and said nothing.
• 1:50:24
  Speaker 1: When we were little, the Mock Turtle went on at last,
• 1:50:27
  Speaker 1: more calmly, though still sobbing a little now and then.
• 1:50:31
  Speaker 1: We went to school in the sea. The master was
• 1:50:34
  Speaker 1: an old turtle. We used to call him Tortoise. Why
• 1:50:39
  Speaker 1: did you call him Tortoise if he wasn't one? Alice asked.
• 1:50:43
  Speaker 1: We called him Tortoise because he taught us, said the
• 1:50:48
  Speaker 1: mock turtle angrily. Really, you are very dull. You ought
• 1:50:55
  Speaker 1: to be ashamed of yourself for asking such a simple question.
• 1:50:58
  Speaker 1: added the griffon, and they both sat silent and looked
• 1:51:00
  Speaker 1: at poor Alice, who felt ready to sink into the earth.
• 1:51:04
  Speaker 1: At last the griffon said to the mock turtle, Drive on,
• 1:51:07
  Speaker 1: old fellow, don't be all day about it. And he
• 1:51:09
  Speaker 1: went on in these words, Yes, we went to school
• 1:51:14
  Speaker 1: in the sea, though you may believe it. I never
• 1:51:18
  Speaker 1: said I didn't, interrupted Alice. You did, said the mock turtle.
• 1:51:24
  Speaker 1: Hold your tongue, added the griffon before Alice could speak again.
• 1:51:27
  Speaker 1: The Mock Turtle went on. We had the best of educations.
• 1:51:33
  Speaker 2: In fact, we went to school every day.
• 1:51:37
  Speaker 1: I've been to a day school, too, said Alice. You
• 1:51:40
  Speaker 1: needn't be so proud as all that.
• 1:51:42
  Speaker 2: With extras?
• 1:51:44
  Speaker 1: Asked the Mock Turtle a little anxiously. Yes, said Alice.
• 1:51:47
  Speaker 1: We learned French and music.
• 1:51:50
  Speaker 2: And washing?
• 1:51:51
  Speaker 1: Said the Mock Turtle. Certainly not, said Alice indignantly. Ah,
• 1:51:56
  Speaker 1: then yours wasn't a really good school, said the Mock
• 1:52:00
  Speaker 1: Turtle in a tone of relief. Now at ours they
• 1:52:04
  Speaker 1: had at the end of the bill French, music, and washing, extra.
• 1:52:11
  Speaker 1: You couldn't have wanted it much, said Alice, living at
• 1:52:14
  Speaker 1: the bottom of the sea. I couldn't afford to learn it,
• 1:52:19
  Speaker 1: said the Mock Turtle with a sigh. I only took
• 1:52:22
  Speaker 1: the regular course. What was that? inquired Alice. Reeling and writhing,
• 1:52:29
  Speaker 1: of course, to begin with, the mock turtle replied, and
• 1:52:33
  Speaker 1: then the different branches of arithmetic, ambition, distraction, uglification, and derision.
• 1:52:42
  Speaker 1: I never heard of uglification, Alice ventured to say. What
• 1:52:47
  Speaker 1: is it? The griffin lifted up both its paws in surprise.'
• 1:52:50
  Speaker 1: Never heard of uglifying?' it exclaimed.' You know what to
• 1:52:54
  Speaker 1: beautify is, I suppose?'' Yes,' said Alice doubtfully.' It means
• 1:52:59
  Speaker 1: to make anything prettier.'' Well then,' the griffin went on,'
• 1:53:04
  Speaker 1: if you don't know what to uglify is, you're a simpleton.'
• 1:53:08
  Speaker 1: Alice did not feel encouraged to ask any more questions
• 1:53:10
  Speaker 1: about it, so she turned to the mock turtle and said,'
• 1:53:13
  Speaker 1: What else had you to learn?' Well, there was mystery,
• 1:53:19
  Speaker 1: the Mock Turtle replied, counting off the subjects on his flappers. Mystery,
• 1:53:25
  Speaker 1: ancient and modern, with seagraphy, then drawling. The drawling master
• 1:53:31
  Speaker 1: was an old conger eel that used to come once
• 1:53:35
  Speaker 1: a week. He taught us drawling, stretching, and fainting in coils.
• 1:53:43
  Speaker 1: What was that like? said Alice. Well, I can't show
• 1:53:47
  Speaker 1: it you myself, the mock turtle said. I'm too stiff,
• 1:53:51
  Speaker 1: and the griffin never learned it. I didn't time, said
• 1:53:55
  Speaker 1: the griffin. I went to the classical master, though. He
• 1:53:58
  Speaker 1: was an old crab, he was. I never went to him,
• 1:54:03
  Speaker 1: the mock turtle said with a sigh. He taught laughing
• 1:54:06
  Speaker 1: and grief, they used to say. So he did, so
• 1:54:10
  Speaker 1: he did. said the griffin, sighing in his turn, and
• 1:54:14
  Speaker 1: both creatures hid their faces in their paws. And how
• 1:54:18
  Speaker 1: many hours a day did you do lessons? said Alice
• 1:54:21
  Speaker 1: in a hurry to change the subject. Ten hours the
• 1:54:24
  Speaker 1: first day, said the mock turtle, nine the next, and
• 1:54:29
  Speaker 1: so on. What a curious plan! exclaimed Alice. That's the
• 1:54:34
  Speaker 1: reason they're called lessons, the griffin remarked, because they lesson
• 1:54:37
  Speaker 1: from day to day. This was quite a new idea
• 1:54:40
  Speaker 1: to Alice, and she thought over it a little before
• 1:54:42
  Speaker 1: she made her next remark. Then the eleventh day must
• 1:54:45
  Speaker 1: have been a holiday. Of course it was, said the
• 1:54:49
  Speaker 1: Mock Turtle. And how did you manage on the twelfth?
• 1:54:53
  Speaker 1: Alice went on eagerly. Lots enough about lessons, the griffin
• 1:54:57
  Speaker 1: interrupted in a very decided tone. Tell her something about
• 1:55:01
  Speaker 1: the games now. End of chapter nine CHAPTER X. OF
• 1:55:12
  Speaker 1: ALICE'S ADVENTURES IN WONDERLAND. By Lewis Carroll. THE LOBSTER QUADRILL
• 1:55:20
  Speaker 1: The Mock Turtle sighed deeply, and drew the back of
• 1:55:23
  Speaker 1: one flapper across his eye. He looked at Alice, and
• 1:55:26
  Speaker 1: tried to speak, but for a minute or two sobs
• 1:55:29
  Speaker 1: choked his voice.' Same as if he had a bone
• 1:55:33
  Speaker 1: in his throat,' said the griffon, and it set to
• 1:55:35
  Speaker 1: work shaking him and punching him in the back. At
• 1:55:38
  Speaker 1: last the Mock Turtle recovered his voice. and with tears
• 1:55:41
  Speaker 1: running down his cheeks, went on again.
• 1:55:43
  Speaker 2: You may not have lived much under the sea.'' I haven't,'
• 1:55:49
  Speaker 2: said Alice.' And perhaps you were never even introduced to
• 1:55:54
  Speaker 2: a lobster.
• 1:55:55
  Speaker 1: Alice began to say,' I once tasted—' but checked herself
• 1:55:59
  Speaker 1: hastily and said,' No, never.'' So you can have no
• 1:56:04
  Speaker 1: idea what a delightful thing a lobster quadrille is.' No, indeed,
• 1:56:11
  Speaker 1: said Alice. What sort of a dance is it? Why,
• 1:56:15
  Speaker 1: said the Gryphon, you first form into a line along
• 1:56:18
  Speaker 1: the seashore. Two lines, cried the mock turtle. Seals, turtles,
• 1:56:23
  Speaker 1: and so on. Then when you've cleared the jellyfish out
• 1:56:27
  Speaker 1: of the way, that generally takes some time, interrupted the Gryphon,
• 1:56:32
  Speaker 1: you advance twice. Each with a lobster as a partner,
• 1:56:37
  Speaker 1: cried the Gryphon. Of course, the Mock Turtle said. Advance twice,
• 1:56:43
  Speaker 1: set to partners. Change lobsters and retire in the same order,
• 1:56:48
  Speaker 1: continued the Gryphon. Then, you know, the Mock Turtle went on.
• 1:56:54
  Speaker 1: You throw the... The lobsters, shouted the Gryphon, with a
• 1:56:57
  Speaker 1: bound into the air. As far out to sea as
• 1:57:01
  Speaker 1: you can. Swim after them, screamed the Gryphon. Turn a
• 1:57:06
  Speaker 1: somersault in the sea. cried the Mock Turtle, capering wildly about.
• 1:57:11
  Speaker 1: Change lobsters again, yelled the griffon. Back to land again,
• 1:57:16
  Speaker 1: and that's all the first figure, said the Mock Turtle,
• 1:57:21
  Speaker 1: suddenly dropping his voice, and the two creatures who had
• 1:57:25
  Speaker 1: been jumping about like mad things all this time sat
• 1:57:28
  Speaker 1: down again very sadly and quietly and looked at Alice.
• 1:57:33
  Speaker 1: It must be a very pretty dance, said Alice timidly.
• 1:57:37
  Speaker 1: Would you like to see a little of it? said
• 1:57:40
  Speaker 1: the Mock Turtle. Very much indeed, said Alice. Come, let's
• 1:57:45
  Speaker 1: try the first figure, said the Mock Turtle to the Gryphon.
• 1:57:50
  Speaker 1: We can do it without lobsters, you know. Which shall sing? Oh,
• 1:57:56
  Speaker 1: you sing, said the Gryphon. I've forgotten the words. So
• 1:58:00
  Speaker 1: they began solemnly dancing round and round Alice, every now
• 1:58:04
  Speaker 1: and then treading on her toes when they passed too close.
• 1:58:07
  Speaker 1: and waving their forepaws to mark the time, while the
• 1:58:10
  Speaker 1: Mock Turtle sang this, very slowly and sadly.
• 1:58:12
  Speaker 2: Will you walk a little faster?' said a whiting to
• 1:58:18
  Speaker 2: a snail.' There' s a porpoise close behind us, and he's
• 1:58:22
  Speaker 2: treading on my tail.' See how eagerly the lobsters and
• 1:58:27
  Speaker 2: the turtles all advance!' They are waiting on the shingle,
• 1:58:31
  Speaker 2: will you come and join the dance? Will you, won't you,
• 1:58:36
  Speaker 2: will you, won't you, will you join the dance? Will you,
• 1:58:40
  Speaker 2: won't you, will you, won't you, won't you join the dance?
• 1:58:44
  Speaker 2: You really have no notion how delightful it will be
• 1:58:49
  Speaker 2: When they take us up and throw us with the
• 1:58:52
  Speaker 2: lobsters out to sea. But the snail replied, too far,
• 1:58:57
  Speaker 2: too far, and gave a look askance, Said he thanked
• 1:59:01
  Speaker 2: the whiting kindly, but he would not join the dance.
• 1:59:05
  Speaker 2: Would not, could not, would not, could not, would not
• 1:59:09
  Speaker 2: join the dance. Would not, could not, would not, could not,
• 1:59:13
  Speaker 2: could not join the dance.' What matters it how far
• 1:59:18
  Speaker 2: we go?' his scaly friend replied.' There is another shore,
• 1:59:23
  Speaker 2: you know, upon the other side.' The further off from
• 1:59:27
  Speaker 2: England the nearer is to France.' Then turn not pale,
• 1:59:31
  Speaker 2: beloved snail, but come and.
• 1:59:34
  Speaker 1: Join the dance.' Will you, won't you, will you, won't you,
• 1:59:38
  Speaker 1: will you join the dance?' Will you, won't you, will you,
• 1:59:42
  Speaker 1: won't you, won't you join the dance? Thank you, it's
• 1:59:47
  Speaker 1: a very interesting dance to watch, said Alice, feeling very
• 1:59:51
  Speaker 1: glad it was over at last. And I do so
• 1:59:54
  Speaker 1: like that curious song about the whiting. Oh, as to
• 1:59:58
  Speaker 1: the whiting, said the Mock Turtle, they, you've seen them,
• 2:00:02
  Speaker 1: of course. Yes, said Alice, I've often seen them at din,
• 2:00:08
  Speaker 1: she checked herself hastily. I don't know where Din may be,
• 2:00:13
  Speaker 1: said the Mock Turtle, but if you've seen them so often,
• 2:00:17
  Speaker 1: of course you know what they're like. I believe so,
• 2:00:22
  Speaker 1: Alice replied thoughtfully. They have their tails in their mouths,
• 2:00:25
  Speaker 1: and they're all over crumbs. You're wrong about the crumbs,
• 2:00:30
  Speaker 1: said the Mock Turtle. Crumbs would all wash off in
• 2:00:32
  Speaker 1: the sea, but they have their tails in their mouths,
• 2:00:37
  Speaker 1: and the reason is... Here the mock turtle yawned and
• 2:00:40
  Speaker 1: shut his eyes.' Tell her about the reason and all that,'
• 2:00:45
  Speaker 1: he said to the griffon.' The reason is,' said the griffon,'
• 2:00:48
  Speaker 1: that they would go with the lobsters to the dance,
• 2:00:51
  Speaker 1: 'so they got thrown out to sea, 'so they had
• 2:00:54
  Speaker 1: to fall a long way, 'so they got their tails
• 2:00:56
  Speaker 1: fast in their mouths, 'so they couldn't get them out again.'
• 2:00:59
  Speaker 1: That' s all.'' Thank you,' said Alice.' It' s very interesting.' I
• 2:01:05
  Speaker 1: never knew so much about a whiting before.' I can
• 2:01:09
  Speaker 1: tell you more than that, if you like, said the griffin.
• 2:01:12
  Speaker 1: Do you know why it's cold awaiting? I never thought
• 2:01:15
  Speaker 1: about it, said Alice. Why? It does the boots and shoes,
• 2:01:21
  Speaker 1: the griffin replied very solemnly. Alice was thoroughly puzzled. Does
• 2:01:26
  Speaker 1: the boots and shoes, she repeated in a wondering tone. Why,
• 2:01:30
  Speaker 1: what are your shoes done with, said the griffin. I mean,
• 2:01:33
  Speaker 1: what makes them so shiny? Alice looked down at them
• 2:01:36
  Speaker 1: and considered a little before she gave her answer. They're
• 2:01:39
  Speaker 1: done with blacking, I believe. Boots and shoes under the sea,
• 2:01:44
  Speaker 1: the griffin went on in a deep voice, are done
• 2:01:46
  Speaker 1: with whiting, now you know. And what are they made of?
• 2:01:50
  Speaker 1: Alice asked in a tone of great curiosity. Souls and eels,
• 2:01:54
  Speaker 1: of course, the griffin replied rather impatiently. Any shrimp could
• 2:01:58
  Speaker 1: have told you that. If I'd been the whiting, said Alice,
• 2:02:02
  Speaker 1: whose thoughts were still running on the song, I'd have
• 2:02:04
  Speaker 1: said to the porpoise, keep back, please, we don't want
• 2:02:07
  Speaker 1: you with us. They were obliged to have him with them,
• 2:02:13
  Speaker 1: the Mock Turtle said. No wise fish would go anywhere
• 2:02:17
  Speaker 1: without a porpoise. Wouldn't it really? said Alice in a
• 2:02:21
  Speaker 1: tone of great surprise. Of course not, said the Mock Turtle. Why,
• 2:02:27
  Speaker 1: if a fish came to me and told me he
• 2:02:30
  Speaker 1: was going a journey, I should say, with what porpoise?
• 2:02:36
  Speaker 1: Don't you mean purpose? said Alice. I mean what I say,
• 2:02:40
  Speaker 1: the Mock Turtle replied in an offended tone. And the
• 2:02:43
  Speaker 1: Griffin added, Come, let's hear some of your adventures. I
• 2:02:47
  Speaker 1: could tell you my adventures, beginning from this morning, said
• 2:02:51
  Speaker 1: Alice a little timidly. But it's no use going back
• 2:02:54
  Speaker 1: to yesterday, because I was a different person then. Explain
• 2:02:59
  Speaker 1: all that, said the Mock Turtle. No, no, the adventures first.
• 2:03:04
  Speaker 1: said the griffin in an impatient tone. Explanations take such
• 2:03:07
  Speaker 1: a dreadful time. So Alice began telling them her adventures
• 2:03:12
  Speaker 1: from the time when she first saw the white rabbit.
• 2:03:15
  Speaker 1: She was a little nervous about it just at first.
• 2:03:17
  Speaker 1: The two creatures got so close to her, one on
• 2:03:19
  Speaker 1: each side, and opened their eyes and mouths so very wide,
• 2:03:23
  Speaker 1: but she gained courage as she went on. Her listeners
• 2:03:27
  Speaker 1: were perfectly quiet till she got to the part about
• 2:03:29
  Speaker 1: her repeating You are old Father William to the caterpillar,
• 2:03:33
  Speaker 1: and the words all coming different, and then the Mock
• 2:03:35
  Speaker 1: Turtle drew a long breath and said, That's very curious.
• 2:03:40
  Speaker 1: It's all about as curious as it can be, said
• 2:03:42
  Speaker 1: the Gryphon. It all came different, the Mock Turtle repeated thoughtfully.
• 2:03:49
  Speaker 1: I should like to hear her repeat something now. Tell
• 2:03:52
  Speaker 1: her to begin. He looked at the griffin as if
• 2:03:55
  Speaker 1: he thought it had some kind of authority over Alice.'
• 2:04:00
  Speaker 1: Stand up and repeat.' Tis the voice of the sluggard,'
• 2:04:03
  Speaker 1: said the griffin.' How the creatures order one about and
• 2:04:07
  Speaker 1: make one repeat lessons,' thought Alice.' I might as well
• 2:04:10
  Speaker 1: be at school at once.' However, she got up and
• 2:04:13
  Speaker 1: began to repeat it, but her head was so full
• 2:04:16
  Speaker 1: of the lobster quadrille that she hardly knew what she
• 2:04:18
  Speaker 1: was saying, and the words came very queer indeed.' Tis
• 2:04:22
  Speaker 1: the voice of the lobster, I heard him declare. You
• 2:04:25
  Speaker 1: have baked me to brown, I must sugar my hair.
• 2:04:28
  Speaker 1: As a duck with its eyelids, so he with his nose,
• 2:04:31
  Speaker 1: trims his belt and his buttons, and turns out his toes.
• 2:04:35
  Speaker 1: When the sands are all dry, he is gay as
• 2:04:37
  Speaker 1: a lark, and will talk in contemptuous tones of the shark.
• 2:04:41
  Speaker 1: But when the tide rises and sharks are around, his
• 2:04:44
  Speaker 1: voice has a timid and tremulous sound.'' That' s different from
• 2:04:48
  Speaker 1: what I used to say when I was a child,'
• 2:04:50
  Speaker 1: said the griffon. Well, I never heard it before, said
• 2:04:55
  Speaker 1: the Mock Turtle, but it sounds uncommon nonsense. Alice said nothing.
• 2:05:02
  Speaker 1: She had sat down with her face in her hands,
• 2:05:03
  Speaker 1: wondering if anything would ever happen in a natural way again.
• 2:05:08
  Speaker 1: I should like to have it explained, said the Mock Turtle.
• 2:05:12
  Speaker 1: She cannot explain it, hastily said the Gryphon. Go on
• 2:05:15
  Speaker 1: with the next verse. But about his toes, the Mock
• 2:05:20
  Speaker 1: Turtle persisted. How could he turn them out with his nose,
• 2:05:24
  Speaker 1: you know? It's the first position in dancing, Alice said,
• 2:05:29
  Speaker 1: but was dreadfully puzzled by the whole thing and longed
• 2:05:31
  Speaker 1: to change the subject. Go on with the next verse,
• 2:05:35
  Speaker 1: the griffon repeated. It begins, I pass by his garden.
• 2:05:40
  Speaker 1: Alice did not dare to disobey, though she felt sure
• 2:05:43
  Speaker 1: it would all come wrong, and she went on in
• 2:05:45
  Speaker 1: a trembling voice. I passed by his garden and marked
• 2:05:49
  Speaker 1: with one eye how the owl and the panther were
• 2:05:52
  Speaker 1: sharing a pie. The panther took pie crust and gravy
• 2:05:55
  Speaker 1: and meat, while the owl had the dish as its
• 2:05:58
  Speaker 1: share of the treat. When the pie was all finished,
• 2:06:01
  Speaker 1: the owl as a boon was kindly permitted to pocket
• 2:06:04
  Speaker 1: the spoon, while the panther received knife and fork with
• 2:06:07
  Speaker 1: a growl and concluded the banquet by,' What is the
• 2:06:11
  Speaker 1: use of repeating all that stuff?' the Mock Turtle interrupted,
• 2:06:16
  Speaker 1: if you don't explain it as you go on. It's
• 2:06:19
  Speaker 1: by far the most confusing thing I ever heard. Yes,
• 2:06:24
  Speaker 1: I think you'd better leave off, said the Gryphon, and
• 2:06:27
  Speaker 1: Alice was only too glad to do so. Shall we
• 2:06:30
  Speaker 1: try another figure of the Lobster Quadrille? the Gryphon went on.
• 2:06:34
  Speaker 1: Or would you like the Mock Turtle to sing you
• 2:06:36
  Speaker 1: another song? Oh, a song, please, if the Mock Turtle
• 2:06:39
  Speaker 1: would be so kind. Alice replied so eagerly that the
• 2:06:42
  Speaker 1: griffin said, in a rather offended tone, Hmph! No accounting tastes.
• 2:06:47
  Speaker 1: Sing her turtle soup, will you, old fellow? The mock
• 2:06:50
  Speaker 1: turtle sighed deeply, and began, in a voice choked with sobs,
• 2:06:53
  Speaker 1: to sing this. Beautiful soup, so rich and green, waiting
• 2:07:00
  Speaker 1: in a hot tureen. Who for such dainties would not stoop?
• 2:07:06
  Speaker 1: Soup of the evening, beautiful soup. Soup of the evening,
• 2:07:11
  Speaker 1: beautiful soup. Beautiful soup, beautiful soup. Soup of the evening, beautiful,
• 2:07:21
  Speaker 1: beautiful soup. Beautiful soup, who cares for fish? Game or
• 2:07:30
  Speaker 1: any other dish? Who would not give all else for two?
• 2:07:37
  Speaker 1: Pennyworth only of beautiful soup. Pennyworth only of beautiful soup.
• 2:07:45
  Speaker 1: Beautiful soup. Beautiful soup. Soup of the evening. Beautiful, beautiful soup.
• 2:07:57
  Speaker 1: Chorus again, cried the griffin, and the mock turtle had
• 2:08:00
  Speaker 1: just begun to repeat it, when a cry of, The
• 2:08:02
  Speaker 1: trial's beginning, was heard in the distance. Come on, cried
• 2:08:07
  Speaker 1: the griffin, and taking Alice by the hand, it hurried
• 2:08:10
  Speaker 1: off without waiting for the end of the song. What
• 2:08:14
  Speaker 1: trial is it? Alice panted as she ran, but the
• 2:08:17
  Speaker 1: griffin only answered, Come on, and ran the faster while
• 2:08:22
  Speaker 1: more and more faintly came, carried on the breeze that
• 2:08:24
  Speaker 1: followed them, the melancholy words, Soup of.
• 2:08:28
  Speaker 2: The evening, beautiful, beautiful soup.
• 2:08:36
  Speaker 1: End of chapter 10 Chapter 11 of Alice's Adventures in
• 2:08:45
  Speaker 1: Wonderland by Lewis Carroll This LibriVox recording is in the
• 2:08:49
  Speaker 1: public domain. Who Stole the Tarts? The king and queen
• 2:08:57
  Speaker 1: of hearts were seated on their throne when they arrived,
• 2:09:00
  Speaker 1: with a great crowd assembled about them, all sorts of
• 2:09:03
  Speaker 1: little birds and beasts, as well as the whole pack
• 2:09:06
  Speaker 1: of cards. The knave was standing before them in chains,
• 2:09:09
  Speaker 1: with a soldier on each side to guard him. And
• 2:09:12
  Speaker 1: near the king was the white rabbit, with a trumpet
• 2:09:14
  Speaker 1: in one hand and a scroll of parchment in the other.
• 2:09:17
  Speaker 1: In the very middle of the court was a table,
• 2:09:19
  Speaker 1: with a large dish of tarts upon it. They looked
• 2:09:22
  Speaker 1: so good that it made Alice quite hungry to look
• 2:09:25
  Speaker 1: at them. I wish they'd get the trial done, she thought,
• 2:09:28
  Speaker 1: and hand round the refreshments. But there seemed to be
• 2:09:31
  Speaker 1: no chance of this, so she began looking about her
• 2:09:34
  Speaker 1: to pass away the time. Alice had never been in
• 2:09:38
  Speaker 1: a court of justice before, but she had read about
• 2:09:40
  Speaker 1: them in books, and she was quite pleased to find
• 2:09:43
  Speaker 1: that she knew the name of nearly everything there. That's
• 2:09:46
  Speaker 1: the judge, she said to herself, because of his great wig.
• 2:09:51
  Speaker 1: The judge, by the way, was the king, and as
• 2:09:53
  Speaker 1: he wore his crown over the wig, he did not
• 2:09:55
  Speaker 1: look at all comfortable, and it was certainly not becoming.
• 2:10:00
  Speaker 1: And that's the jury box, thought Alice. And those twelve creatures,
• 2:10:04
  Speaker 1: she was obliged to say creatures, you see, because some
• 2:10:07
  Speaker 1: of them were animals and some were birds. I suppose
• 2:10:10
  Speaker 1: they're the jurors, she said this last word two or
• 2:10:12
  Speaker 1: three times over to herself, being rather proud of it.
• 2:10:16
  Speaker 1: for she thought, and rightly too, that very few little
• 2:10:19
  Speaker 1: girls of her age knew the meaning of it at all. However,
• 2:10:22
  Speaker 1: jurymen would have done just as well. The twelve jurors
• 2:10:25
  Speaker 1: were all writing very busily on slates.' What are they
• 2:10:29
  Speaker 1: all doing?' Alice whispered to the griffin.' They can't have
• 2:10:32
  Speaker 1: anything to put down yet, before the trial's begun.'' They' re
• 2:10:36
  Speaker 1: putting down their names,' the griffin whispered in reply,' for
• 2:10:39
  Speaker 1: fear they should forget them before the end of the trial.'
• 2:10:43
  Speaker 1: Stupid things, Alice began in a loud, indignant voice, but
• 2:10:47
  Speaker 1: she stopped hastily, for the white rabbit cried out, Silence
• 2:10:50
  Speaker 1: in the court! And the king put on his spectacles
• 2:10:54
  Speaker 1: and looked anxiously round to see who was talking. Alice
• 2:10:58
  Speaker 1: could see, as well as if she were looking over
• 2:11:00
  Speaker 1: their shoulders, that all the jurors were writing down stupid
• 2:11:03
  Speaker 1: things on their slates, and she could even make out
• 2:11:06
  Speaker 1: that one of them didn't know how to spell stupid,
• 2:11:09
  Speaker 1: and that he had to ask his neighbor to tell him.
• 2:11:11
  Speaker 1: A nice muddle their slates will be in before the
• 2:11:14
  Speaker 1: trial's over, thought Alice. One of the jurors had a
• 2:11:18
  Speaker 1: pencil that squeaked. This, of course, Alice could not stand,
• 2:11:21
  Speaker 1: and she went round the court and got behind him,
• 2:11:24
  Speaker 1: and very soon found an opportunity of taking it away.
• 2:11:27
  Speaker 1: She did it so quickly that the poor little juror,
• 2:11:30
  Speaker 1: it was Bill the Lizard, could not make out at
• 2:11:32
  Speaker 1: all what had become of it. So, after hunting all
• 2:11:35
  Speaker 1: about for it, he was obliged to write with one
• 2:11:38
  Speaker 1: finger for the rest of the day. and this was
• 2:11:40
  Speaker 1: of very little use, as it left no mark on
• 2:11:42
  Speaker 1: the slate. Harold, read the accusation, said the king. On
• 2:11:48
  Speaker 1: this the white rabbit blew three blasts on the trumpet,
• 2:11:51
  Speaker 1: and then unrolled the parchment scroll, and read as follows.
• 2:11:54
  Speaker 1: The queen of hearts, she made some tarts all on
• 2:11:57
  Speaker 1: a summer day. The knave of hearts, he stole those tarts,
• 2:12:01
  Speaker 1: and took them quite away. Consider your verdict, the king
• 2:12:05
  Speaker 1: said to the jury. No, not yet, not yet, the
• 2:12:08
  Speaker 1: rabbit hastily interrupted. There's a great deal to come before that.
• 2:12:13
  Speaker 1: Call the witness, said the king, and the rabbit blew
• 2:12:16
  Speaker 1: three blasts on the trumpet and called out, First witness!
• 2:12:20
  Speaker 1: The first witness was the hatter. He came in with
• 2:12:23
  Speaker 1: a teacup in one hand and a piece of bread
• 2:12:25
  Speaker 1: and butter in the other. I beg your pardon, your majesty,
• 2:12:29
  Speaker 1: he began, for bringing these in, but I hadn't quite
• 2:12:32
  Speaker 1: finished my tea when I was sent for. You ought
• 2:12:36
  Speaker 1: to have finished, said the king. When did you begin?
• 2:12:39
  Speaker 1: The hatter looked at the March Hare, who had followed
• 2:12:41
  Speaker 1: him into the court, arm in arm with the Dormouse.
• 2:12:45
  Speaker 1: Fourteenth of March, I think it was, he said. Fifteenth,
• 2:12:49
  Speaker 1: said the March Hare. Sixteenth, said the Dormouse. Write that down,
• 2:12:55
  Speaker 1: the king said to the jury, and the jury eagerly
• 2:12:57
  Speaker 1: wrote down all three dates on their slates, and then
• 2:12:59
  Speaker 1: added them up, and reduced the answer to shillings and pence.
• 2:13:03
  Speaker 1: Take off your hat. the king said to the hatter.
• 2:13:06
  Speaker 1: It isn't mine, said the hatter. Stolen, the king exclaimed,
• 2:13:11
  Speaker 1: turning to the jury, who instantly made a memorandum of
• 2:13:14
  Speaker 1: the fact. I keep them to sell, the hatter added
• 2:13:17
  Speaker 1: as an explanation. I've none of my own. I'm a hatter.
• 2:13:22
  Speaker 1: Here the queen put on her spectacles and began staring
• 2:13:25
  Speaker 1: hard at the hatter, who turned pale and fidgeted. Give
• 2:13:29
  Speaker 1: your evidence, said the king, and don't be nervous, or
• 2:13:32
  Speaker 1: I'll have you executed on the spot. This did not
• 2:13:35
  Speaker 1: seem to encourage the witness at all. He kept shifting
• 2:13:38
  Speaker 1: from one foot to the other, looking uneasily at the queen,
• 2:13:41
  Speaker 1: and in his confusion he bit a large piece out
• 2:13:43
  Speaker 1: of his teacup instead of the bread and butter. Just
• 2:13:47
  Speaker 1: at this moment Alice felt a very curious sensation, which
• 2:13:50
  Speaker 1: puzzled her a good deal until she made out what
• 2:13:52
  Speaker 1: it was. She was beginning to grow larger again, and
• 2:13:55
  Speaker 1: she thought at first she would get up and leave
• 2:13:57
  Speaker 1: the court, but on second thoughts she decided to remain
• 2:14:00
  Speaker 1: where she was as long as there was room for her.
• 2:14:04
  Speaker 1: I wish you wouldn't squeeze so, said the Dormouse, who
• 2:14:06
  Speaker 1: was sitting next to her. I can hardly breathe. I
• 2:14:10
  Speaker 1: can't help it, said Alice very meekly. I'm growing. You've
• 2:14:14
  Speaker 1: no right to grow here, said the Dormouse. Don't talk nonsense,
• 2:14:19
  Speaker 1: said Alice more boldly. You know you're growing, too. Yes,
• 2:14:23
  Speaker 1: but I grow at a reasonable pace, said the Dormouse.
• 2:14:26
  Speaker 1: Not in that ridiculous fashion. And he got up very
• 2:14:29
  Speaker 1: sulkily and crossed over to the other side of the court.
• 2:14:34
  Speaker 1: All this time the queen had never left off staring
• 2:14:36
  Speaker 1: at the hatter, and just as the dormouse crossed the court,
• 2:14:40
  Speaker 1: she said to one of the officers of the court,
• 2:14:43
  Speaker 1: Bring me the list of the singers in the last concert,
• 2:14:46
  Speaker 1: on which the wretched hatter trembled so that he shook
• 2:14:49
  Speaker 1: off both of his shoes. Give your evidence, the king
• 2:14:53
  Speaker 1: repeated angrily, or I'll have you executed, whether you're nervous
• 2:14:56
  Speaker 1: or not. I'm a poor man, your majesty, the hatter
• 2:15:01
  Speaker 1: began in a trembling voice. and I hadn't begun my tea,
• 2:15:05
  Speaker 1: not above a week or so, and what with the
• 2:15:07
  Speaker 1: bread and butter getting so thin, and the twinkling of
• 2:15:10
  Speaker 1: the tea. The twinkling of the what? said the king.
• 2:15:14
  Speaker 1: It began with the tea, the hatter replied. Of course
• 2:15:19
  Speaker 1: twinkling begins with a tea, said the king sharply. Do
• 2:15:21
  Speaker 1: you take me for a dunce?
• 2:15:23
  Speaker 2: Go on.
• 2:15:25
  Speaker 1: I'm a poor man, the hatter went on, and most
• 2:15:27
  Speaker 1: things twinkled after that. Only the March Hare said, I didn't,
• 2:15:32
  Speaker 1: the March Hare interrupted in a great hurry. You did,
• 2:15:35
  Speaker 1: said the Hatter. I deny it, said the March Hare.
• 2:15:39
  Speaker 1: He denies it, said the King. Leave out that part. Well,
• 2:15:43
  Speaker 1: at any rate, the Dormouse said, the Hatter went on,
• 2:15:45
  Speaker 1: looking anxiously round to see if he would deny it too,
• 2:15:48
  Speaker 1: but the Dormouse denied nothing, being fast asleep. After that,
• 2:15:53
  Speaker 1: continued the Hatter, I cut some more bread and butter.
• 2:15:56
  Speaker 1: But what did the Dormouse say? one of the jury asked.
• 2:15:59
  Speaker 1: That I can't remember, said the hatter. You must remember,
• 2:16:03
  Speaker 1: remarked the king, or I'll have you executed. The miserable
• 2:16:08
  Speaker 1: hatter dropped his teacup and bread and butter and went
• 2:16:10
  Speaker 1: down on one knee. I'm a poor man, your majesty,
• 2:16:14
  Speaker 1: he began. You're a very poor speaker, said the king.
• 2:16:19
  Speaker 1: Here one of the guinea pigs cheered and was immediately
• 2:16:22
  Speaker 1: suppressed by the officers of the court. As that is
• 2:16:25
  Speaker 1: rather a hard word, I will just explain to you
• 2:16:27
  Speaker 1: how it was done. they had a large canvas bag,
• 2:16:30
  Speaker 1: which tied up at the mouth with strings. Into this
• 2:16:32
  Speaker 1: they slipped the guinea-pig head first, and then sat upon it.'
• 2:16:35
  Speaker 1: I' m glad I've seen that done,' thought Alice.' I' ve so
• 2:16:39
  Speaker 1: often read in the newspapers, at the end of trials,
• 2:16:41
  Speaker 1: there was some attempt at applause, which was immediately suppressed
• 2:16:44
  Speaker 1: by the officers of the court, and I never understood
• 2:16:47
  Speaker 1: what it meant till now.'' If that's all you know
• 2:16:51
  Speaker 1: about it, you may stand down,' continued the king.' I
• 2:16:54
  Speaker 1: can't go no lower,' said the Hatter.' I' m on the
• 2:16:57
  Speaker 1: floor as it is.' Then you may sit down, the
• 2:17:00
  Speaker 1: king replied. Here the other guinea pig cheered and was suppressed. Come,
• 2:17:06
  Speaker 1: that finishes the guinea pigs, thought Alice. Now we shall
• 2:17:09
  Speaker 1: get on better. I'd rather finish my tea, said the hatter,
• 2:17:13
  Speaker 1: with an anxious look at the queen, who was reading
• 2:17:16
  Speaker 1: the list of singers. You may go, said the king,
• 2:17:19
  Speaker 1: and the hatter hurriedly left the court, without even waiting
• 2:17:22
  Speaker 1: to put his shoes on. And just take his head
• 2:17:25
  Speaker 1: off outside, the queen added to one of the officers.
• 2:17:28
  Speaker 1: but the hatter was out of sight before the officer
• 2:17:31
  Speaker 1: could get to the door. Call the next witness, said
• 2:17:34
  Speaker 1: the king. The next witness was the duchess's cook. She
• 2:17:38
  Speaker 1: carried the pepper box in her hand, and Alice guessed
• 2:17:41
  Speaker 1: who it was, even before she got into the court,
• 2:17:43
  Speaker 1: by the way the people near the door began sneezing
• 2:17:45
  Speaker 1: all at once. Give your evidence, said the king. Shant,
• 2:17:51
  Speaker 1: said the cook. The king looked anxiously at the white rabbit,
• 2:17:54
  Speaker 1: who said in a low voice, Your majesty must cross-examine
• 2:17:58
  Speaker 1: this witness. Well, if I must, I must, the king
• 2:18:02
  Speaker 1: said with a melancholy air. and after folding his arms
• 2:18:05
  Speaker 1: and frowning at the cook, till his eyes were nearly
• 2:18:08
  Speaker 1: out of sight, he said in a deep voice, What
• 2:18:11
  Speaker 1: are tarts made of? Pepper, mostly, said the cook. Treacle,
• 2:18:17
  Speaker 1: said a sleepy voice behind her. Color that dormouse, the
• 2:18:22
  Speaker 1: queen shrieked out. Behead that dormouse. Turn that dormouse out
• 2:18:25
  Speaker 1: of the court. Suppress him. Pinch him. Off with his whiskers.
• 2:18:29
  Speaker 1: For some minutes, the whole court was in confusion, getting
• 2:18:32
  Speaker 1: the dormouse turned out, and by the time they had
• 2:18:35
  Speaker 1: settled down again, the cook had disappeared. Never mind, said
• 2:18:39
  Speaker 1: the king, with an air of great relief. Call the
• 2:18:42
  Speaker 1: next witness! And he added in an undertone to the queen, Really,
• 2:18:47
  Speaker 1: my dear, you must cross-examine this next witness. It quite
• 2:18:50
  Speaker 1: makes my forehead ache. Alice watched the white rabbit as
• 2:18:54
  Speaker 1: he fumbled over the list, feeling very curious to see
• 2:18:57
  Speaker 1: what the next witness would be like. For they haven't
• 2:19:00
  Speaker 1: got much evidence yet, she said to herself. Imagine her
• 2:19:04
  Speaker 1: surprise when the white rabbit read out at the top
• 2:19:06
  Speaker 1: of his shrill little voice the name Alice. End of
• 2:19:13
  Speaker 1: Chapter 11 Chapter 12 of Alice's Adventures in Wonderland by
• 2:19:22
  Speaker 1: Lewis Carroll This LibriVox recording is in the public domain.
• 2:19:28
  Speaker 1: Alice's Evidence' Here!' cried Alice, quite forgetting in the flurry
• 2:19:34
  Speaker 1: of the moment how large she had grown in the
• 2:19:36
  Speaker 1: last few minutes, and she jumped up in such a
• 2:19:38
  Speaker 1: hurry that she tipped over the jury-box with the edge
• 2:19:41
  Speaker 1: of her skirt, upsetting all the jurymen on to their
• 2:19:43
  Speaker 1: heads of the crowd below, and there they lay sprawling about,
• 2:19:47
  Speaker 1: reminding her very much of a globe of goldfish she
• 2:19:49
  Speaker 1: had accidentally upset the week before.' Oh, I beg your pardon!'
• 2:19:54
  Speaker 1: she exclaimed in a tone of great dismay, and began
• 2:19:57
  Speaker 1: picking them up again as quickly as she could. for
• 2:20:00
  Speaker 1: the accident of the goldfish kept running in her head,
• 2:20:03
  Speaker 1: and she had a vague sort of idea that they
• 2:20:05
  Speaker 1: must be collected at once and put back into the
• 2:20:07
  Speaker 1: jury box, or they would die. The trial cannot proceed,
• 2:20:11
  Speaker 1: said the king in a very grave voice, until all
• 2:20:14
  Speaker 1: the jurymen are back in their proper places. All, he
• 2:20:18
  Speaker 1: repeated with great emphasis, looking hard at Alice as he
• 2:20:21
  Speaker 1: said so. Alice looked at the jury box and saw
• 2:20:27
  Speaker 1: that in her haste she had put the lizard in
• 2:20:30
  Speaker 1: head downwards and the poor little thing was waving its
• 2:20:32
  Speaker 1: tail about in a melancholy way, being quite unable to move.
• 2:20:37
  Speaker 1: She soon got it out again and put it right.
• 2:20:40
  Speaker 1: Not that it signifies much, she said to herself. I
• 2:20:43
  Speaker 1: should think it would be quite as much use in
• 2:20:45
  Speaker 1: the trial one way up as the other. As soon
• 2:20:48
  Speaker 1: as the jury had a little recovered from the shock
• 2:20:51
  Speaker 1: of being upset and their slates and pencils had been
• 2:20:54
  Speaker 1: found and handed back to them, they set to work
• 2:20:56
  Speaker 1: very diligently to write out a history of the accident,
• 2:20:59
  Speaker 1: all except the lizard, who seemed too much overcome to
• 2:21:02
  Speaker 1: do anything, but sit with its mouth open, gazing up
• 2:21:05
  Speaker 1: into the roof of the court. What do you know
• 2:21:08
  Speaker 1: about this business? the king said to Alice. Nothing. Nothing whatever?
• 2:21:13
  Speaker 1: persisted the king. Nothing whatever? said Alice. That's very important,
• 2:21:18
  Speaker 1: the king said, turning to the jury. They were just
• 2:21:21
  Speaker 1: beginning to write this down on their slates when the
• 2:21:23
  Speaker 1: white rabbit interrupted. Unimportant, your majesty means, of course, he
• 2:21:28
  Speaker 1: said in a very respectful tone, but frowning and making
• 2:21:30
  Speaker 1: faces at him as he spoke. Unimportant, of course, I mean,
• 2:21:35
  Speaker 1: the king hastily said, and went on himself in an undertone. Important, unimportant, unimportant, important.
• 2:21:42
  Speaker 1: As if he were trying which word sounded best. Some
• 2:21:46
  Speaker 1: of the jury wrote it down important and some unimportant.
• 2:21:50
  Speaker 1: Alice could see this as she was near enough to
• 2:21:52
  Speaker 1: look over their slates. But it doesn't matter a bit,
• 2:21:55
  Speaker 1: she thought to herself. At this moment the king, who
• 2:21:58
  Speaker 1: had been for some time busily writing in his notebook,
• 2:22:01
  Speaker 1: called out, Silence! and read out from his book, Rule 42,
• 2:22:06
  Speaker 1: all persons more than a mile high to leave the court.
• 2:22:09
  Speaker 1: Everybody looked at Alice. I'm not a mile high, said Alice.
• 2:22:14
  Speaker 1: You are, said the king. Nearly two miles high, added
• 2:22:19
  Speaker 1: the queen. Well, I shan't go at any rate, said Alice. Besides,
• 2:22:23
  Speaker 1: that's not a regular rule. You invented it just now.
• 2:22:27
  Speaker 1: It's the oldest rule in the book, said the king.
• 2:22:30
  Speaker 1: Then it ought to be number one, said Alice. The
• 2:22:34
  Speaker 1: king turned pale and shut his notebook hastily. Consider your verdict,
• 2:22:38
  Speaker 1: he said to the jury in a low, trembling voice.
• 2:22:41
  Speaker 1: There's more evidence to come yet, please your majesty, said
• 2:22:44
  Speaker 1: the white rabbit, jumping up in a great hurry. This
• 2:22:48
  Speaker 1: paper has just been picked up.' What' s in it?' said
• 2:22:52
  Speaker 1: the Queen.' I haven't opened it yet,' said the White Rabbit.'
• 2:22:55
  Speaker 1: But it seems to be a letter written by the
• 2:22:58
  Speaker 1: prisoner to— to somebody.'' It must have been that,' said the King.'
• 2:23:02
  Speaker 1: Unless it was written to nobody, which isn't usual, you know.''
• 2:23:05
  Speaker 1: Who is it directed to?' said one of the jurymen.'
• 2:23:09
  Speaker 1: It isn't directed at all,' said the White Rabbit.' In fact,
• 2:23:14
  Speaker 1: there's nothing written on the outside,' he unfolded the paper
• 2:23:18
  Speaker 1: as he spoke, and added—' It isn't a letter, after all.
• 2:23:21
  Speaker 1: It's a set of verses. Are they in the prisoner's handwriting?
• 2:23:26
  Speaker 1: asked another of the jurymen. No, they're not, said the
• 2:23:29
  Speaker 1: white rabbit. And that's the queerest thing about it. The
• 2:23:33
  Speaker 1: jury all looked puzzled. He must have imitated somebody else's hand,
• 2:23:38
  Speaker 1: said the king. The jury all brightened up again. Please,
• 2:23:42
  Speaker 1: your majesty, said the knave, I didn't write it, and
• 2:23:44
  Speaker 1: they can't prove that I did. There's no name signed.
• 2:23:47
  Speaker 2: At the end.
• 2:23:49
  Speaker 1: If you didn't sign it, said the king, that only
• 2:23:51
  Speaker 1: makes the matter worse. You must have meant some mischief,
• 2:23:55
  Speaker 1: or else you'd have signed your name like an honest man.
• 2:23:58
  Speaker 1: There was a general clapping of hands at this. It
• 2:24:00
  Speaker 1: was the first really clever thing that the king had
• 2:24:03
  Speaker 1: said that day. That proves his guilt, of course, said
• 2:24:07
  Speaker 1: the queen. So off with! It doesn't prove anything of
• 2:24:10
  Speaker 1: the sort, said Alice. Why, you don't even know what
• 2:24:13
  Speaker 1: they're about. Read them, said the king. The white rabbit
• 2:24:18
  Speaker 1: put on his spectacles.' Where shall I begin, please your majesty?'
• 2:24:22
  Speaker 1: he asked.' Begin at the beginning,' the king said gravely,'
• 2:24:25
  Speaker 1: and go on till you come to the end, then stop.'
• 2:24:30
  Speaker 1: There was dead silence in the court whilst the rabbit
• 2:24:33
  Speaker 1: read out these verses.' They told me you had been
• 2:24:36
  Speaker 1: to her and mentioned me to him.' She gave me
• 2:24:39
  Speaker 1: a good character but said I could not swim.' He
• 2:24:42
  Speaker 1: sent them word I had not gone, we know it
• 2:24:45
  Speaker 1: to be true.' if she should push the matter on
• 2:24:48
  Speaker 1: what would become of you i gave her one they
• 2:24:51
  Speaker 1: gave him two you gave us three or more they
• 2:24:54
  Speaker 1: all returned from him to you though they were mine
• 2:24:56
  Speaker 1: before if i or she should chance to be involved
• 2:25:00
  Speaker 1: in this affair he trusts to you to set them
• 2:25:03
  Speaker 1: free exactly as we were my notion was that you
• 2:25:07
  Speaker 1: had been before she had this fit an obstacle that
• 2:25:10
  Speaker 1: came between him and ourselves and it Don't let him
• 2:25:14
  Speaker 1: know she liked them best, for this must ever be
• 2:25:18
  Speaker 1: a secret kept from all the rest between yourself and me.
• 2:25:22
  Speaker 1: That's the most important piece of evidence we've heard yet,
• 2:25:25
  Speaker 1: said the king, rubbing his hands. So now let the jury,
• 2:25:29
  Speaker 1: if any of them can explain it, said Alice. She
• 2:25:32
  Speaker 1: had grown so large in the last few minutes that
• 2:25:34
  Speaker 1: she wasn't a bit afraid of interrupting him. I'll give
• 2:25:37
  Speaker 1: him sixpence. I don't believe there's an atom of meaning
• 2:25:40
  Speaker 1: in it. the jury all wrote down on their slates.
• 2:25:45
  Speaker 1: She doesn't believe there's an atom of meaning in it,
• 2:25:47
  Speaker 1: but none of them attempted to explain the paper. If
• 2:25:51
  Speaker 1: there's no meaning in it, said the king, that saves
• 2:25:53
  Speaker 1: a world of trouble, you know, as we needn't try
• 2:25:56
  Speaker 1: to find any. And yet I don't know, he went on,
• 2:25:59
  Speaker 1: spreading out the verses on his knee and looking at
• 2:26:01
  Speaker 1: them with one eye. I seem to see some meaning
• 2:26:04
  Speaker 1: in them after all. Said I could not swim. You
• 2:26:07
  Speaker 1: can't swim, can you? He added, turning to the knave.
• 2:26:11
  Speaker 1: The knave shook his head sadly.' Do I look like it?'
• 2:26:14
  Speaker 1: he said, which he certainly did not, being made entirely
• 2:26:17
  Speaker 1: of cardboard.' All right so far,' said the king, as
• 2:26:20
  Speaker 1: he went on muttering over the verses to himself.' We
• 2:26:23
  Speaker 1: know it to be true. That's the jury, of course.
• 2:26:26
  Speaker 1: If she should push the matter on, that must be
• 2:26:28
  Speaker 1: the queen. What would become of you? What indeed? I
• 2:26:33
  Speaker 1: gave her one, they gave him two. Why, that must
• 2:26:35
  Speaker 1: be what he did with the tart, you know.' But
• 2:26:39
  Speaker 1: it goes on, they all returned from him to you,
• 2:26:41
  Speaker 1: said Alice. Why, there they are, said the king triumphantly,
• 2:26:46
  Speaker 1: pointing to the tarts on the table. Nothing can be
• 2:26:49
  Speaker 1: clearer than that. Then again, before she had this fit.
• 2:26:53
  Speaker 1: You never had fits, my dear, I think, he said
• 2:26:56
  Speaker 1: to the queen. Never, said the queen furiously, throwing an
• 2:27:00
  Speaker 1: inkstand at the lizard as she spoke. The unfortunate little
• 2:27:04
  Speaker 1: bill had left off writing on his slate with one finger,
• 2:27:06
  Speaker 1: as he found it made no mark, but he now
• 2:27:09
  Speaker 1: hastily began again using the ink that was trickling down
• 2:27:11
  Speaker 1: his face, as long as it lasted. Then the words
• 2:27:14
  Speaker 1: don't fit you, said the king, looking round the court
• 2:27:17
  Speaker 1: with a smile. There was a dead silence. It's a pun,
• 2:27:22
  Speaker 1: the king added in an angry tone, and everybody laughed.
• 2:27:25
  Speaker 1: Let the jury consider their verdict, the king said for
• 2:27:29
  Speaker 1: about the twentieth time that day. No, no, said the queen.
• 2:27:34
  Speaker 1: Sentence first, verdict afterwards. Stuff and nonsense, said Alice loudly.
• 2:27:40
  Speaker 1: The idea of having the sentence first. Hold your tongue,
• 2:27:45
  Speaker 1: said the queen, turning purple. I won't, said Alice. Off
• 2:27:50
  Speaker 1: with her head, the queen shouted at the top of
• 2:27:53
  Speaker 1: her voice. Nobody moved.' Who cares for you?' said Alice,
• 2:27:58
  Speaker 1: as she had grown to her full size by this time.'
• 2:28:00
  Speaker 1: You' re nothing but a pack of cards.' At this the
• 2:28:04
  Speaker 1: whole pack rose up into the air and came flying
• 2:28:07
  Speaker 1: down upon her. She gave a little scream, half of
• 2:28:10
  Speaker 1: fright and half of anger, and tried to beat them off,
• 2:28:13
  Speaker 1: and found herself lying on the bank with her head
• 2:28:15
  Speaker 1: in the lap of her sister, who was gently brushing
• 2:28:17
  Speaker 1: away some dead leaves that had fluttered down from the
• 2:28:20
  Speaker 1: trees upon her face.' Wake up, Alice dear,' said her sister. Why,
• 2:28:25
  Speaker 1: what a long sleep you've had! Oh, I've had such
• 2:28:28
  Speaker 1: a curious dream, said Alice, and she told her sister,
• 2:28:32
  Speaker 1: as well as she could remember them, all these strange
• 2:28:34
  Speaker 1: adventures of hers that you have just been reading about,
• 2:28:37
  Speaker 1: and when she had finished, her sister kissed her, and said,
• 2:28:41
  Speaker 1: It was a curious dream, dear, certainly, but now run
• 2:28:44
  Speaker 1: in to your tea, it's getting late. So Alice got
• 2:28:47
  Speaker 1: up and ran off, thinking while she ran, as well
• 2:28:50
  Speaker 1: as she might, what a wonderful dream it had been.
• 2:28:53
  Speaker 1: But her sister sat still just as she had left her,
• 2:28:56
  Speaker 1: leaning her head, watching the setting sun, and thinking of
• 2:28:59
  Speaker 1: little Alice and all her wonderful adventures, till she too
• 2:29:02
  Speaker 1: began dreaming after a fashion, and this was her dream.
• 2:29:07
  Speaker 1: First she dreamed of little Alice herself, and once again
• 2:29:10
  Speaker 1: the tiny hands were clasped upon her knee, and the
• 2:29:12
  Speaker 1: bright eager eyes were looking up into hers. She could
• 2:29:15
  Speaker 1: hear the very tones of her voice, and see that
• 2:29:18
  Speaker 1: queer little toss of her head to keep back the
• 2:29:20
  Speaker 1: wandering hair that would always get into her eyes, and
• 2:29:23
  Speaker 1: still as she listened, or seemed to listen, the whole
• 2:29:26
  Speaker 1: place around her became alive with the strange creatures of
• 2:29:29
  Speaker 1: her little sister's dream. The long grass rustled at her
• 2:29:33
  Speaker 1: feet as the white rabbit hurried by. The frightened mouse
• 2:29:36
  Speaker 1: splashed his way through the neighboring pool. She could hear
• 2:29:39
  Speaker 1: the rattle of the teacups as the March Hare and
• 2:29:41
  Speaker 1: his friends shared their never-ending meal, and the shrill voice
• 2:29:45
  Speaker 1: of the queen ordering off her unfortunate guests to execution.
• 2:29:49
  Speaker 1: Once more the pig-baby was sneezing on the duchess's knee.
• 2:29:52
  Speaker 1: while plates and dishes crashed around it. Once more the
• 2:29:55
  Speaker 1: shriek of the griffin, the squeaking of the lizard's slate-pencil,
• 2:29:58
  Speaker 1: and the choking of the suppressed guinea-pigs, filled the air,
• 2:30:01
  Speaker 1: mixed up with the distant sobs of the miserable mock-turtle.
• 2:30:06
  Speaker 1: So she sat on with closed eyes, and half believed
• 2:30:09
  Speaker 1: herself in Wonderland, though she knew she had but to
• 2:30:12
  Speaker 1: open them again, and all would change to dull reality.
• 2:30:15
  Speaker 1: The grass would be only rustling in the wind, and
• 2:30:17
  Speaker 1: the pool rippling to the waves of the reeds, the
• 2:30:20
  Speaker 1: rattling teacups would change to the tinkling sheep-bells and the
• 2:30:23
  Speaker 1: queen's shrill cries to the voice of the shepherd-boy, and
• 2:30:26
  Speaker 1: the sneeze of the baby, the shriek of the griffin,
• 2:30:29
  Speaker 1: and all the other queer noises would change, she knew,
• 2:30:32
  Speaker 1: to the confused clamour of the busy farmyard, while the
• 2:30:35
  Speaker 1: lowing of cattle in the distance would take the place
• 2:30:37
  Speaker 1: of the mock turtle's heavy sobs. Lastly, she pictured to
• 2:30:41
  Speaker 1: herself how this same little sister of hers would, in
• 2:30:44
  Speaker 1: the after-time, be herself a grown woman, and how she
• 2:30:47
  Speaker 1: would keep through all her riper years the simple and
• 2:30:50
  Speaker 1: loving heart of her childhood, and how she would gather
• 2:30:53
  Speaker 1: about her other little children and make their eyes bright
• 2:30:56
  Speaker 1: and eager with many a strange tale, perhaps even with
• 2:30:59
  Speaker 1: the dream of Wonderland of long ago, and how she
• 2:31:02
  Speaker 1: would feel with all their simple sorrows and find a
• 2:31:04
  Speaker 1: pleasure in all their simple joys, remembering her own child-life
• 2:31:09
  Speaker 1: and the happy summer days. Read by Eric Leach, Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania.