Latest / Juicy Scoop with Heather McDonald / Did She Kill Her Husband and Nepo Babies on Stage with Josh Wolf

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Did She Kill Her Husband and Nepo Babies on Stage with Josh Wolf · Juicy Scoop with Heather McDonald

• 0:00
  Speaker 1: Christmas shopping has already started in our house. My daughter
• 0:03
  Speaker 1: is so organised, already planning Christmas gifts from Macaulay. Hair
• 0:07
  Speaker 1: care for her aunt and a fab fragrance for her bestie.
• 0:10
  Speaker 1: But the apple doesn't fall far from the tree. I'm
• 0:13
  Speaker 1: an early bird, buying one present a week from now
• 0:15
  Speaker 1: till Christmas, which makes budgeting less stressful. I can buy
• 0:18
  Speaker 1: in-store or online from Macaulay.ie for home delivery or free
• 0:22
  Speaker 1: click and collect.
• 0:23
  Speaker 2: So easy.
• 0:25
  Speaker 1: Gifts they'll cherish at prices you'll love.
• 0:30
  Speaker 2: Hello and welcome to Juicy Scoop. Well, I'm getting ready
• 0:33
  Speaker 2: to go to Tempe. I will be there this Friday,
• 0:36
  Speaker 2: June 16th and 17th. Also on Friday is where you'll
• 0:40
  Speaker 2: get to listen to the extra Juicy Scoop. You go
• 0:43
  Speaker 2: to heathermcdolland.net, click on Patreon. That is where you get
• 0:46
  Speaker 2: really my inner thoughts, topics that are too juicy for
• 0:50
  Speaker 2: the regular show. You will not be disappointed. Everyone loves
• 0:54
  Speaker 2: it and it's every Friday and so much more. Check
• 0:56
  Speaker 2: it out. All right, let's get into the show. Heather
• 0:59
  Speaker 2: MacDonald has got the Juicy Scoop. When you're on the road,
• 1:06
  Speaker 2: when you're on the go, Juicy Scoop is the show
• 1:10
  Speaker 2: to know.
• 1:10
  Speaker 3: She talks Hollywood tales, her real life, Mr.
• 1:13
  Speaker 2: Segment, Serial Data, and Serial Sister. You'll be addicted and
• 1:18
  Speaker 2: addicted fast to the number one tabloid real life podcast.
• 1:22
  Speaker 3: Listen in, listen up.
• 1:24
  Speaker 2: Woo, woo. Heather MacDonald.
• 1:27
  Speaker 4: Juicy Scoop.
• 1:29
  Speaker 2: Hello and welcome to Juicy Scoop. I have returned favorite.
• 1:32
  Speaker 2: A lot of people thought you're a model, you're a
• 1:35
  Speaker 2: fitness dude, you have a nice chest.
• 1:38
  Speaker 4: Thank you.
• 1:39
  Speaker 2: Josh Wolf, known as a comedian, but oftentimes just a
• 1:42
  Speaker 2: thirsty dad.
• 1:43
  Speaker 3: Welcome to the show.
• 1:45
  Speaker 4: Do you know every now and then I'll post a
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  Speaker 4: thirsty photo without a doubt.
• 1:50
  Speaker 2: So do I all the time. Very proud of it.
• 1:51
  Speaker 2: Very proud of the thirst traps.
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  Speaker 4: You know what it is for me? Like when I
• 1:55
  Speaker 4: was younger, I wore kind of baggy clothes.
• 1:58
  Speaker 5: And now that I'm getting older and I'm like, I
• 2:00
  Speaker 5: don't know how many more of these pictures I'll be
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  Speaker 5: able to take.
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  Speaker 4: I'm putting them out there.
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  Speaker 2: I 100% agree. And I saw something, I don't know
• 2:08
  Speaker 2: how to say it exactly, but it was one of
• 2:09
  Speaker 2: those things that like your biggest regret or like beauty is,
• 2:12
  Speaker 2: what's that thing? Beauty is wasted on the youth or
• 2:15
  Speaker 2: something like that. You look back at like when you
• 2:17
  Speaker 2: were 28 and I was like, I don't think you
• 2:20
  Speaker 2: can wear a bikini. Oh my God, girl.
• 2:23
  Speaker 3: Like, what are you talking about?
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  Speaker 5: By the way, do you know what I think is great?
• 2:27
  Speaker 5: Like when we were growing up, if a woman was
• 2:31
  Speaker 5: going to wear, in my high school years, there were
• 2:34
  Speaker 5: like three girls brave enough to wear a bikini who
• 2:37
  Speaker 5: felt like they were, and now just young girls wear,
• 2:41
  Speaker 5: and women wear bikinis.
• 2:42
  Speaker 4: Doesn't matter what their bodies are.
• 2:43
  Speaker 2: I think it's great. Because in our time, which was,
• 2:46
  Speaker 2: I noticed the biggest difference right around MySpace and Paris Hilton.
• 2:51
  Speaker 2: She was the first person that could openly brag about
• 2:54
  Speaker 2: herself and people were being supportive of the bragging. And
• 2:58
  Speaker 2: that's when I was like, oh my God, I grew
• 2:59
  Speaker 2: up with the worst thing you could be called by
• 3:02
  Speaker 2: another girl is you're conceited. You think too much of yourself.
• 3:06
  Speaker 2: And now everybody is just, social media is all about
• 3:10
  Speaker 2: praising yourself. I mean, can you imagine ever in our
• 3:13
  Speaker 2: day you going on a family trip with your family
• 3:16
  Speaker 2: and being like, no, wait, can you just take a
• 3:18
  Speaker 2: picture of me alone?
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  Speaker 4: Who would ever.
• 3:21
  Speaker 2: Just take a picture of themselves alone? And that's all
• 3:23
  Speaker 2: we do now is just take a picture of ourselves alone.
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  Speaker 4: That is so true.
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  Speaker 5: When we were growing up, the family picture was basically–
• 3:33
  Speaker 5: It was basically the mom getting everyone together and saying
• 3:37
  Speaker 5: one time, everybody look fucking happy for one picture.
• 3:39
  Speaker 4: And everyone was like, yeah.
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  Speaker 6: Right.
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  Speaker 2: And the dads were like never photographed.
• 3:43
  Speaker 3: That's right.
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  Speaker 4: Because they were the ones taking the picture.
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  Speaker 2: Yeah, they were the original Insta boyfriend.
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  Speaker 6: Yeah.
• 3:48
  Speaker 2: Yeah.
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  Speaker 4: Oh, my gosh. Yeah, my dad looking back was not...
• 3:51
  Speaker 4: You know what else?
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  Speaker 5: Growing up, I remember my oldest son Trevor asked me,
• 3:57
  Speaker 5: he was like, how come there aren't more pictures of
• 3:58
  Speaker 5: you when you were a kid?
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  Speaker 4: I'm like, because... That's not what we did. Like they
• 4:02
  Speaker 4: took maybe four pictures of me a year.
• 4:04
  Speaker 2: What number were you out of the boys? You were
• 4:06
  Speaker 2: the youngest, too. Yeah. And I'm the youngest. And remember
• 4:08
  Speaker 2: when we when I talked about that, maybe you don't
• 4:11
  Speaker 2: at Chelsea lately, but we were like all in the
• 4:13
  Speaker 2: writer's room. And I think all of us but one
• 4:16
  Speaker 2: was the youngest child. And I said, oh, my gosh,
• 4:19
  Speaker 2: I remember reading that every president but two is a
• 4:22
  Speaker 2: firstborn male. And I was like, and I think the
• 4:26
  Speaker 2: opposite is, every comedian is a mistake youngest child that
• 4:30
  Speaker 2: was exposed to way too much shit when they were younger.
• 4:34
  Speaker 2: Completely inappropriate, because we were being raised by wild wolves.
• 4:37
  Speaker 3: Our brothers and sisters.
• 4:38
  Speaker 4: How much older were your brothers and sisters?
• 4:39
  Speaker 2: So it was like, my brother was like nine, eight,
• 4:43
  Speaker 2: when I was born, like nine, eight, six, and then
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  Speaker 2: my other sister was two and a half.
• 4:47
  Speaker 4: And then I was born. They were way older than you.
• 4:50
  Speaker 2: Yeah, so then it was just like I got to
• 4:53
  Speaker 2: see everything, which I absolutely think made my perspective to
• 4:57
  Speaker 2: be observant, but also inappropriate, and not the president, but
• 5:02
  Speaker 2: in a comedian.
• 5:03
  Speaker 5: But you also figured out Because it was kind of
• 5:06
  Speaker 5: your job, anyways, for me as with three older brothers,
• 5:10
  Speaker 5: the way to get them to stop picking on me
• 5:13
  Speaker 5: or to stop making me do things I didn't like
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  Speaker 5: to do was to be the jester.
• 5:17
  Speaker 6: Yeah.
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  Speaker 4: Do you know what I mean? Watch me do this weird,
• 5:19
  Speaker 4: funny thing.
• 5:20
  Speaker 2: Yeah. There's a photo of me with just a grandmother's
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  Speaker 2: wig and a pair of heels, butt naked at like
• 5:27
  Speaker 2: two and a half. like dancing, framed in an album,
• 5:32
  Speaker 2: like completely, like if that happened today, if someone was
• 5:36
  Speaker 2: trying to get that thing photographed today, they would be
• 5:38
  Speaker 2: like FBI at their house. But they were like, she's
• 5:41
  Speaker 2: a performer.
• 5:44
  Speaker 4: We all had naked bath pics in the photo albums.
• 5:46
  Speaker 4: I'm like, looking back, I'm like, why are these in here?
• 5:49
  Speaker 4: They're like, that's cute.
• 5:50
  Speaker 2: I'm like, yeah, to a different lens. Yeah, we didn't
• 5:53
  Speaker 2: realize that, yeah. 100%, yeah. There was also a photo
• 5:57
  Speaker 2: that my dad sent to his sister, and then when
• 6:01
  Speaker 2: she passed, the cousins brought it back to me, and
• 6:04
  Speaker 2: it was me in a wig and gloves and all this,
• 6:07
  Speaker 2: and he's like, she's only two, but she goes and
• 6:09
  Speaker 2: finds these and comes out in his character's. And I
• 6:12
  Speaker 2: was like, oh my gosh, look at me now. It
• 6:15
  Speaker 2: really all worked out.
• 6:20
  Speaker 5: Did your parents, were they OK when you were a
• 6:22
  Speaker 5: teenager trying wine or beer or anything like that?
• 6:28
  Speaker 2: Yeah, I mean, like once I got to college, we
• 6:30
  Speaker 2: went on like a Napa Valley and like, sure, I
• 6:33
  Speaker 2: could have a sip of wine or whatever. And I
• 6:35
  Speaker 2: think they probably knew we went to parties and had
• 6:38
  Speaker 2: like wine coolers. But my older brothers and sisters were
• 6:42
  Speaker 2: such fuck-ups and disappointments that there'd be times where I'd
• 6:46
  Speaker 2: wake up and I'd be like eight, you know, and
• 6:49
  Speaker 2: they'd be in their pajamas and they'd been up all
• 6:51
  Speaker 2: night and one of them didn't come home or got
• 6:53
  Speaker 2: in a car accident. And I remember my mom just
• 6:55
  Speaker 2: turned to me and said, If you or your sister, Shannon,
• 6:58
  Speaker 2: who my sister is, we never got in trouble, never
• 7:01
  Speaker 2: grounded once. She's an attorney. We were just like, we're
• 7:03
  Speaker 2: the two younger mistakes. And she goes, if you and
• 7:06
  Speaker 2: your sister ever disappoint us like this, we're just going
• 7:08
  Speaker 2: to kill ourselves. And I was like, good morning.
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  Speaker 3: No pressure. No pressure.
• 7:13
  Speaker 2: But I never tried pot because of that. Or cocaine. I...
• 7:19
  Speaker 2: I mean, I have had a brownie and like things
• 7:22
  Speaker 2: since then. But in college, when I tried pot, when
• 7:26
  Speaker 2: I tried the bong.
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  Speaker 4: I love that you call it pot and the bong.
• 7:30
  Speaker 3: Yeah.
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  Speaker 4: So I'm in college now.
• 7:32
  Speaker 2: Never tried it in high school. And my mom also
• 7:35
  Speaker 2: used to say, if you're ever wondering about trying something,
• 7:37
  Speaker 2: just say, just always imagine your parents watching you. which
• 7:40
  Speaker 2: also made me stay a virgin until.
• 7:42
  Speaker 4: I was 27.
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  Speaker 2: So anyway, I took the bong and it was like,
• 7:46
  Speaker 2: I remember being in there like, here, try it. Like
• 7:48
  Speaker 2: these guys, whatever. I'm like, all right, I can try
• 7:49
  Speaker 2: a pot now. I'm like 19 or 20, you know, 18. And,
• 7:53
  Speaker 2: and just the lighting it and the holding it and
• 7:55
  Speaker 2: then they're yelling at me and I'm like sucking it.
• 7:57
  Speaker 2: There's a lot of complicated hand eye movement. Like I
• 8:00
  Speaker 2: don't do video games and I'm not on athletic. And
• 8:03
  Speaker 2: I was like, you know what? I just don't think
• 8:04
  Speaker 2: this is for me. It was just too complicated.
• 8:06
  Speaker 5: I've never heard somebody describe smoking a bong as athletic.
• 8:11
  Speaker 2: Well, I felt like you had to have a lot
• 8:12
  Speaker 2: of things going on at the same time.
• 8:13
  Speaker 3: It's just this part.
• 8:14
  Speaker 2: No, you have to light it. Then you have to
• 8:16
  Speaker 2: hold it. Then you have to suck it at the
• 8:18
  Speaker 2: right time.
• 8:19
  Speaker 4: What does this sound like?
• 8:20
  Speaker 2: Too much.
• 8:21
  Speaker 3: Again, not great at that either.
• 8:25
  Speaker 2: Not great at that either.
• 8:26
  Speaker 4: When I met you, you were a virgin?
• 8:29
  Speaker 3: Yes.
• 8:31
  Speaker 2: When we met when you were in your 20s?
• 8:33
  Speaker 3: Yeah. And were you talking about that?
• 8:37
  Speaker 2: Never would I share that. Because never.
• 8:41
  Speaker 4: Yeah, and on stage you didn't talk about it.
• 8:42
  Speaker 2: Never. I acted like a slut all the time.
• 8:45
  Speaker 3: Did you?
• 8:46
  Speaker 2: I dry humped and drank up and down Sunset Boulevard.
• 8:49
  Speaker 4: What a great name for an album.
• 8:50
  Speaker 2: But no, but no.
• 8:51
  Speaker 4: Dry humped and drinking.
• 8:53
  Speaker 3: Yeah.
• 8:54
  Speaker 2: No, I had jokes that made me look like a slut. Everything.
• 8:57
  Speaker 4: How come you wanted to appear like a slut?
• 9:00
  Speaker 2: Not a slut.
• 9:00
  Speaker 4: But how come you wanted to, how come?
• 9:02
  Speaker 2: Because I knew everyone would just think it was super weird,
• 9:04
  Speaker 2: and whenever I did reveal it to anybody, they would
• 9:07
  Speaker 2: just assume I was a super Christian, or if they did...
• 9:11
  Speaker 2: Because I would, like, just want a boyfriend to have,
• 9:13
  Speaker 2: you know, but I wanted to be a boyfriend, so
• 9:14
  Speaker 2: I wanted to wait enough until they'd be a boyfriend.
• 9:16
  Speaker 2: But then if I revealed it, they were like, oh,
• 9:18
  Speaker 2: my God, this girl's going to, like, want to have
• 9:20
  Speaker 2: my baby and marry me, like, goodbye.
• 9:21
  Speaker 4: Right.
• 9:22
  Speaker 2: Which wasn't the case at all. And then when I
• 9:24
  Speaker 2: finally did do it, it was fine. Like, it wasn't even, like,
• 9:26
  Speaker 2: it was a guy I dated significantly. Like, not significantly,
• 9:29
  Speaker 2: but he was, like, a good guy, new from college,
• 9:31
  Speaker 2: but he didn't want to be my boyfriend. But at
• 9:32
  Speaker 2: that point, I was like, fine, who cares?
• 9:34
  Speaker 3: Let's get it over with.
• 9:35
  Speaker 2: But I totally, like, regret that.
• 9:38
  Speaker 4: Regret waiting?
• 9:39
  Speaker 1: Yeah.
• 9:39
  Speaker 2: The only positives of it is that I think it
• 9:42
  Speaker 2: kept me really focused on, like, my career and stuff
• 9:45
  Speaker 2: because I was never going to, like, put something aside
• 9:48
  Speaker 2: or blow off a stand-up date for a dude, which
• 9:51
  Speaker 2: a lot of my friends would do. You know, they
• 9:54
  Speaker 2: moved with a guy or do whatever.
• 9:56
  Speaker 7: Yeah.
• 9:56
  Speaker 2: And I didn't have that.
• 9:58
  Speaker 5: And so then— I will tell you, for me, I'm
• 10:00
  Speaker 5: glad I had kids young because it kind of did
• 10:04
  Speaker 5: the same thing where I was like, I don't have
• 10:06
  Speaker 5: time for all this other fuck about.
• 10:08
  Speaker 2: Yes.
• 10:09
  Speaker 4: Do you know when I went?
• 10:10
  Speaker 2: I think what I want to say, I noticed there
• 10:12
  Speaker 2: is kind of been an interesting thing I've noticed lately
• 10:15
  Speaker 2: that either people are not getting married at all. or
• 10:17
  Speaker 2: they are choosing to get married a little bit younger
• 10:20
  Speaker 2: than like our age, you know how it was like,
• 10:21
  Speaker 2: no one should get married before 30 kind of a thing. Um,
• 10:24
  Speaker 2: when the, when I'm seeing couples getting married, even my
• 10:27
  Speaker 2: friend's kids that are, you know, just got out of college,
• 10:30
  Speaker 2: they're like 25, 26. They got married a year and
• 10:32
  Speaker 2: a half ago. They just had their first baby and
• 10:34
  Speaker 2: they went to U of a and, and like, and
• 10:37
  Speaker 2: I was like, Oh, that's, you know, kind of interesting.
• 10:39
  Speaker 2: And I've noticed it's happening more. And I do think
• 10:41
  Speaker 2: it's great because I do think, a lot of people
• 10:45
  Speaker 2: then all of a sudden aren't fucking around till they're
• 10:48
  Speaker 2: 35 and they're actually like buying a home combining their
• 10:52
  Speaker 2: you know finances yeah i've noticed there's like a movement
• 10:55
  Speaker 2: towards getting married younger.
• 10:56
  Speaker 5: Yeah focuses you in like yeah i know they're when
• 10:59
  Speaker 5: i started going back to the comedy store out to
• 11:02
  Speaker 5: these places i found that a lot of comics they
• 11:04
  Speaker 5: were like oh we thought you were so aloof i'm
• 11:06
  Speaker 5: like me they said yeah you would do your set
• 11:09
  Speaker 5: and go home i was like I had a family. Yeah.
• 11:11
  Speaker 2: What do you think?
• 11:12
  Speaker 5: I'm going to hang out with you until one in
• 11:14
  Speaker 5: the morning and talk about my set. Like that's not,
• 11:17
  Speaker 5: do you know that, that it took me out of
• 11:19
  Speaker 5: that world altogether. Yeah. I, yeah, I really, and it
• 11:22
  Speaker 5: made also, it really focused in on what was important.
• 11:25
  Speaker 2: I have one serious question for you because your son
• 11:27
  Speaker 2: is here now.
• 11:28
  Speaker 7: Yeah.
• 11:28
  Speaker 2: Tall drink of water.
• 11:30
  Speaker 4: How do we have so tall?
• 11:32
  Speaker 2: We fed them.
• 11:33
  Speaker 4: Yeah.
• 11:34
  Speaker 2: Yeah. I, I, I've said this before, but I gave
• 11:37
  Speaker 2: Drake too much pediatrics.
• 11:39
  Speaker 4: Look at him.
• 11:40
  Speaker 2: I know. I know. And then I heard from a
• 11:42
  Speaker 2: bunch of other moms that are like, oh, my God,
• 11:44
  Speaker 2: I did the same thing. My son is like now
• 11:46
  Speaker 2: six five has six size 15 foot. I'm telling you,
• 11:50
  Speaker 2: anybody that has a small kid, buy that fucking Peter Schur.
• 11:53
  Speaker 4: You and Peter are tall.
• 11:54
  Speaker 2: I know. He would have been tall anyway, but I
• 11:56
  Speaker 2: swear to God, I think that Peter Schur had something
• 11:58
  Speaker 2: to do with it.
• 11:58
  Speaker 5: Look, he's half Jewish, half Asian. There's no height in
• 12:02
  Speaker 5: either one of those. There's no reason he should be
• 12:04
  Speaker 5: over 5'8.
• 12:06
  Speaker 4: Do you know what I mean? That's a small group
• 12:08
  Speaker 4: of people.
• 12:08
  Speaker 2: It can happen.
• 12:09
  Speaker 3: It can happen for you.
• 12:11
  Speaker 2: Okay, I have a question for you because it's etched
• 12:13
  Speaker 2: in my brain and it was pretty disturbing. So we
• 12:16
  Speaker 2: were good friends. We'd talk on the phone about where
• 12:18
  Speaker 2: we're going to do stand-up that night. And Jacob was
• 12:21
  Speaker 2: a baby, like maybe under one. And I called you
• 12:24
  Speaker 2: in the afternoon about doing a gig. And Joey Diaz
• 12:27
  Speaker 2: was over. And you said, Joey Diaz is in the
• 12:30
  Speaker 2: bath with Jacob right now. Was he really physically in
• 12:33
  Speaker 2: the bath? Because at the time, I did imagine him
• 12:35
  Speaker 2: in the bath. No, no, no.
• 12:37
  Speaker 5: He didn't take baths with Jacob. He didn't take baths
• 12:39
  Speaker 5: with Jacob. But Joey was a great babysitter. Let me
• 12:42
  Speaker 5: balance that out.
• 12:43
  Speaker 6: Okay.
• 12:43
  Speaker 2: For anyone who doesn't know, Joey Diaz is hilarious, but,
• 12:48
  Speaker 2: you know, very edgy.
• 12:49
  Speaker 3: Okay, so.
• 12:50
  Speaker 2: An edgy life. Yes.
• 12:51
  Speaker 4: And I, here's what I didn't have.
• 12:53
  Speaker 2: So he was, so just to put me at ease,
• 12:55
  Speaker 2: because I.
• 12:56
  Speaker 4: He's not in a bath.
• 12:56
  Speaker 2: I can't tell you the vision.
• 12:57
  Speaker 3: Not in the bath.
• 12:58
  Speaker 2: That has never gone away from my brain.
• 12:59
  Speaker 4: Not in the bath. First of all, if Joey and
• 13:01
  Speaker 4: Jacob were in the bath.
• 13:02
  Speaker 2: I don't think we could fit.
• 13:03
  Speaker 4: There's not a lot of room for water.
• 13:04
  Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah. Yeah, yeah.
• 13:05
  Speaker 5: You know, it's like two drops. But I will tell you,
• 13:09
  Speaker 5: here's how I balanced it out. I didn't have, you know,
• 13:11
  Speaker 5: I was making $ 1, 000 a month.
• 13:14
  Speaker 6: Yeah.
• 13:14
  Speaker 5: And I was raising three kids in one room by myself.
• 13:17
  Speaker 5: So it's not like I had a lot of disposable income,
• 13:19
  Speaker 5: but I still wanted to go out and do my sets.
• 13:21
  Speaker 4: Joey was a free babysitter.
• 13:23
  Speaker 2: Yes.
• 13:24
  Speaker 4: Now I will say that although some of his methods were,
• 13:28
  Speaker 4: what would, what's the right, unorthodox.
• 13:30
  Speaker 5: That's a good, I will tell you this. I, the
• 13:34
  Speaker 5: one thing I loved about Joe as a babysitter is.
• 13:36
  Speaker 4: That look, my $ 10 an hour.
• 13:38
  Speaker 5: Babysitter, if shit goes down is not take, Joey's jumping
• 13:42
  Speaker 5: in front of a bus for my kids.
• 13:43
  Speaker 4: He loves them.
• 13:44
  Speaker 7: Yeah, yeah.
• 13:44
  Speaker 4: So what was important? Now, I will tell you, one
• 13:47
  Speaker 4: time I came home, and he was a bigger dude
• 13:49
  Speaker 4: back then. He didn't wear underwear.
• 13:50
  Speaker 6: Oh.
• 13:51
  Speaker 4: And so, Heather, one day, I come in. He goes, okay, kids, everybody,
• 13:56
  Speaker 4: we're going to clean up the toys.
• 13:57
  Speaker 5: And he bends over, and Caitlin, who was my daughter,
• 14:00
  Speaker 5: who was probably four or five at the time, ripped
• 14:03
  Speaker 5: some hair out of his ass crack.
• 14:05
  Speaker 3: And goes, how many?
• 14:07
  Speaker 4: And he goes, oh, it felt like five that time.
• 14:09
  Speaker 3: I go, that time? And I go, what do you
• 14:11
  Speaker 3: mean that time? And he goes, oh, she loves that game.
• 14:14
  Speaker 4: I go, yeah, but I fucking hate it, dude.
• 14:16
  Speaker 5: I go, can't you find another game like Monopoly or something?
• 14:19
  Speaker 3: He was like, she loves it.
• 14:21
  Speaker 4: I go, no, that's the end of that game.
• 14:22
  Speaker 6: But.
• 14:25
  Speaker 3: But like.
• 14:27
  Speaker 5: So yeah, it was a different, but being raised by
• 14:30
  Speaker 5: me was different also. I was an unorthodox parent also.
• 14:34
  Speaker 2: Well, I have some topics that I want to cover
• 14:37
  Speaker 2: with you.
• 14:37
  Speaker 3: Okay.
• 14:38
  Speaker 2: Specifically because you have such a unique background being that
• 14:41
  Speaker 2: you were a single father of three and struggling community
• 14:44
  Speaker 2: before you got married to your beautiful wife.
• 14:46
  Speaker 5: By the way, her movie is number five on Netflix
• 14:49
  Speaker 5: right now.
• 14:50
  Speaker 2: Tell everybody about it.
• 14:51
  Speaker 4: It's called Forever My Girl.
• 14:53
  Speaker 2: It was a couple years ago, so they're just releasing it.
• 14:57
  Speaker 2: She's a director.
• 14:58
  Speaker 5: She's a director, and she wrote and directed it. I
• 15:01
  Speaker 5: asked Jacob today, I'm like, how long do these things
• 15:02
  Speaker 5: usually stay in the top ten?
• 15:04
  Speaker 4: He said a week. Not only has it been in
• 15:06
  Speaker 4: for two weeks, it's climbing.
• 15:08
  Speaker 5: And it's climbing without Netflix putting it on their front page,
• 15:12
  Speaker 5: without them advertising it.
• 15:13
  Speaker 4: It's all word of mouth. It's a beautiful, romantic comedy,
• 15:18
  Speaker 4: would you call it?
• 15:18
  Speaker 2: I would say it's a great thing to watch with
• 15:21
  Speaker 2: your kids or your teenage daughters or teenage boys, whatever.
• 15:24
  Speaker 4: It feels very Nicholas Sparks.
• 15:25
  Speaker 2: Yeah, it's really, really great.
• 15:28
  Speaker 5: And I'm so proud of her that it's doing this
• 15:31
  Speaker 5: all on its own, on its own merits, without them helping.
• 15:34
  Speaker 4: She's a rock star.
• 15:36
  Speaker 2: Well, we're going to talk about her too late. Okay,
• 15:38
  Speaker 2: first I want to talk about this story. Are you
• 15:40
  Speaker 2: familiar with this story? This woman who lives in Utah
• 15:44
  Speaker 2: was married to this guy, and he was very suspicious
• 15:47
  Speaker 2: that she might be trying to poison him. And he
• 15:49
  Speaker 2: even told his family they were on a trip. He
• 15:52
  Speaker 2: had something. He was, like, almost, you know, really sick.
• 15:55
  Speaker 2: He told his sister, like, if anything happens to me,
• 15:57
  Speaker 2: check out her. And she said, oh, my God, I
• 16:01
  Speaker 2: gave him a Moscow Mule. Then I went into my
• 16:03
  Speaker 2: kid's room and, like, fell asleep. And when I got
• 16:05
  Speaker 2: back in there, he was dead, but he's had a
• 16:07
  Speaker 2: problem with illicit drugs. Anyway, I made sure to, I
• 16:11
  Speaker 2: think she cremated him, whatever. And then people came forward
• 16:16
  Speaker 2: saying I sold her fentanyl and she's now, you know,
• 16:20
  Speaker 2: been arrested. Okay.
• 16:21
  Speaker 4: And her searches on her iPhone.
• 16:22
  Speaker 6: Okay.
• 16:23
  Speaker 4: So I have them.
• 16:24
  Speaker 2: The searches on the iPhone are amazing.
• 16:27
  Speaker 6: Insane.
• 16:28
  Speaker 2: They are so good. So I just highlighted a few.
• 16:30
  Speaker 4: Okay.
• 16:31
  Speaker 2: Okay. So here we go. These are really some fun ones. Okay.
• 16:35
  Speaker 2: So the blue, as you can see, if you're watching
• 16:37
  Speaker 2: this on YouTube, the blue are the things that pertain
• 16:41
  Speaker 2: to the case and the other ones are not.
• 16:43
  Speaker 4: Okay.
• 16:43
  Speaker 2: So can you delete everything on an iCloud account? Can
• 16:47
  Speaker 2: you delete everything on an off on an old iPhone
• 16:50
  Speaker 2: without actually having it? Can you delete messages that have
• 16:53
  Speaker 2: been retrieved? Can you chant? Can you change the password
• 16:56
  Speaker 2: remotely of a lost cell phone? Can you delete messages?
• 16:59
  Speaker 2: It continues. Um, What to do when cops seize electronics.
• 17:04
  Speaker 2: What information can be obtained. But then also in between
• 17:07
  Speaker 2: are lakefront ranches for sale. Montana ranches for sale by
• 17:11
  Speaker 2: a lake. Tennessee ranches for sale. Oh, she'd like to
• 17:14
  Speaker 2: buy a ranch after she knocks him off. Then another one. Oh,
• 17:17
  Speaker 2: she's getting a little worried. Utah prisons. Yeah.
• 17:20
  Speaker 4: My favorite one is the one at the bottom.
• 17:21
  Speaker 2: How to undo microblading. That's when you do your brows
• 17:24
  Speaker 2: and you don't love them. Girl, what are you doing?
• 17:27
  Speaker 2: Between killing the husband, worrying about that she's going to
• 17:29
  Speaker 2: get caught, she's like, these fucking eyebrows are a piece
• 17:31
  Speaker 2: of shit.
• 17:32
  Speaker 4: What about the bottom one? That's the one that got
• 17:33
  Speaker 4: me the most.
• 17:34
  Speaker 2: Easter bunny quote.
• 17:34
  Speaker 6: Yeah.
• 17:35
  Speaker 4: Just crying.
• 17:37
  Speaker 2: You see what he quotes? Look here, just looking for
• 17:39
  Speaker 2: some fun. Just being a mom. Just being a mom.
• 17:42
  Speaker 3: Okay, it gets better.
• 17:43
  Speaker 4: Sorry I hopped past your life.
• 17:45
  Speaker 2: Okay, then, okay. What are you allowed inside Utah jails? Then,
• 17:50
  Speaker 2: let's see. Will life insurance pay death certificate if it
• 17:54
  Speaker 2: says pending? Death certificate says pending. You know, continues. Then,
• 17:58
  Speaker 2: is little Nas ex-married? Is little Nas gay? Okay. Chick-fil-A.
• 18:06
  Speaker 2: Idaho Cabin Getaways. Fuck, I'm getting stressed thinking about my
• 18:10
  Speaker 2: dead husband.
• 18:10
  Speaker 4: What's Bronx and Donk's sleeping bag?
• 18:12
  Speaker 3: I think she was.
• 18:12
  Speaker 2: Looking for a cute sleeping bag for one of the kids.
• 18:15
  Speaker 4: Bronx and Donk's sounds like a terrible gay bar.
• 18:17
  Speaker 2: Kelly Pickler husband. I'm single. What's up with Kelly Pickler's husband?
• 18:21
  Speaker 2: I mean, it gets so good. Okay, then it's getting better, okay?
• 18:26
  Speaker 2: I could have done this all day, but I won't. Okay,
• 18:28
  Speaker 2: if someone is poisoned, what does it go down on
• 18:30
  Speaker 2: the death certificate as?
• 18:33
  Speaker 4: That is so specific.
• 18:35
  Speaker 3: That is like.
• 18:36
  Speaker 2: It gets more specific. Because she wasn't totally sold on
• 18:39
  Speaker 2: the fentanyl. Right. Okay, so then she was like, what
• 18:42
  Speaker 2: is naloxone? Is naloxone similar to heroin? What is presumpisitive?
• 18:49
  Speaker 2: I don't know what that is. Can you overdose on
• 18:51
  Speaker 2: naltrexone nor fentanyl? Then she's like, beachfront hotels in California.
• 18:58
  Speaker 2: Adult-only resorts near L.A. California women escape getaway. There's nothing
• 19:03
  Speaker 2: a girl needs more than a girl's getaway after she.
• 19:07
  Speaker 4: Murdered her husband.
• 19:10
  Speaker 3: Girl, he's dead.
• 19:11
  Speaker 2: We need a getaway. Wine weekend, ladies.
• 19:15
  Speaker 4: If we were writing this on a show.
• 19:17
  Speaker 2: They'd say too much. They'd say too obvious.
• 19:19
  Speaker 4: This is too far.
• 19:20
  Speaker 2: Yeah, this is too far.
• 19:21
  Speaker 4: Yeah, this is amazing.
• 19:23
  Speaker 5: The California women escape getaways is like.
• 19:26
  Speaker 2: I know.
• 19:28
  Speaker 4: Is she getting a tattoo in Park City?
• 19:30
  Speaker 2: I think she might. She's like, you know what? Again,
• 19:34
  Speaker 2: remember the tattoo that the girl that killed her little
• 19:37
  Speaker 2: baby called.
• 19:39
  Speaker 1: What was it?
• 19:39
  Speaker 3: Casey.
• 19:40
  Speaker 2: Anthony. Yeah, she got a tattoo, too. You know, live
• 19:43
  Speaker 2: and let live or something. Bella Light for my god
• 19:47
  Speaker 2: yeah a tattoo you always want to end one chapter
• 19:50
  Speaker 2: with a tattoo I mean this girl good luck being
• 19:54
  Speaker 2: her I said it to my sister the defense attorney
• 19:56
  Speaker 2: I go I'm going to send you something that's going
• 19:58
  Speaker 2: to fucking blow your mind because I always talk to
• 20:00
  Speaker 2: her and her husband and I'm like they have such
• 20:03
  Speaker 2: great stories of just like their worst clients where they're like, um, okay,
• 20:07
  Speaker 2: I can't deal with that.
• 20:08
  Speaker 3: Is this defensible?
• 20:09
  Speaker 4: What'd your, what'd your sister say?
• 20:11
  Speaker 2: I haven't talked to her, but I will talk to
• 20:12
  Speaker 2: her about it. I said it to her. I love
• 20:14
  Speaker 2: to always get her perspective and she can always pull
• 20:16
  Speaker 2: something out of her asshole to make someone possibly make
• 20:21
  Speaker 2: them want, make, make them people wonder.
• 20:23
  Speaker 4: Let me ask you a question. If you were worried
• 20:27
  Speaker 4: about Peter poisoning you.
• 20:29
  Speaker 6: Yeah.
• 20:30
  Speaker 5: How many times would you have to be worried before
• 20:32
  Speaker 5: you were like, you know what? I'm going to pull
• 20:34
  Speaker 5: out of this marriage. So if this guy, how long
• 20:36
  Speaker 5: had he been telling.
• 20:38
  Speaker 4: People she might kill me that he still stuck around?
• 20:41
  Speaker 2: It was like a couple of years. And then he
• 20:42
  Speaker 2: also changed the policy, which she thought she was getting
• 20:45
  Speaker 2: it all. He changed it to like his sister.
• 20:47
  Speaker 5: But why stick around if you think your wife is trying.
• 20:50
  Speaker 4: To murder you?
• 20:52
  Speaker 2: Yeah, I mean, maybe he wasn't that worried, but he
• 20:55
  Speaker 2: was just throwing it out there. But I think if
• 20:58
  Speaker 2: Peter did kill me and then we pulled up his
• 21:00
  Speaker 2: Google things, Drake was like, can you imagine what dads
• 21:03
  Speaker 2: would be? It would be like fentanyl, fentanyl. What are
• 21:05
  Speaker 2: the 10 best golf resorts in the world? Trips to Ireland.
• 21:09
  Speaker 2: How much is a first class trip to Ireland? Should
• 21:11
  Speaker 2: I pop off to Scotland after?
• 21:13
  Speaker 4: Is there a golfing dating site? What's it called, the
• 21:17
  Speaker 4: 19th hole? Yeah, yeah. Where you just go and find
• 21:20
  Speaker 4: people who like to golf?
• 21:21
  Speaker 2: Listen, he does not want a girlfriend who golfs.
• 21:24
  Speaker 4: No, that's the escape spot, right?
• 21:26
  Speaker 2: Yeah, no, yeah. It would all be about just golf
• 21:29
  Speaker 2: and just spending my money and fancy ice cubes under whiskey.
• 21:37
  Speaker 5: Outside of the death searches, if I was trying to
• 21:39
  Speaker 5: kill Beth, it would just be like, how do I.
• 21:44
  Speaker 5: How do I stay alone? Basically, if I'm killing Beth,
• 21:48
  Speaker 5: it's just because I don't want.
• 21:49
  Speaker 4: To be around other people. Do you know what I mean?
• 21:51
  Speaker 5: So where can I go where nobody will find me?
• 21:53
  Speaker 4: Would be my search.
• 21:54
  Speaker 2: Well, I think about what I would do in prison
• 21:57
  Speaker 2: so much that I'm scared that I'm like, Manifesting it? Yes.
• 22:01
  Speaker 2: And so I'm like, please, I don't want it. I
• 22:02
  Speaker 2: just think like worst case scenario, like what would I do?
• 22:06
  Speaker 4: And two of the- And?
• 22:07
  Speaker 2: Well, the former Real Housewife, Jen Shah, she's from Salt
• 22:10
  Speaker 2: Lake City actually, so maybe this girl can join her.
• 22:13
  Speaker 2: And now Elizabeth Holmes from One Drop of Blood.
• 22:16
  Speaker 4: Yeah.
• 22:16
  Speaker 2: That girl's in the same prison.
• 22:18
  Speaker 4: Yeah.
• 22:18
  Speaker 6: Oh, really?
• 22:19
  Speaker 2: They're in the same prison, and allegedly they're working on,
• 22:22
  Speaker 2: or the Jen Shaw Salt Lake one is working on
• 22:24
  Speaker 2: a play that they're going to put on a little
• 22:27
  Speaker 2: play about Real Housewives.
• 22:28
  Speaker 4: Oh, my God. In jail?
• 22:30
  Speaker 2: In jail.
• 22:31
  Speaker 3: So 100% that's- Would you go to that?
• 22:34
  Speaker 2: I would be in it, obviously. I mean, I'm just saying,
• 22:38
  Speaker 2: if I'm there. That's why she looked up luxury- You
• 22:40
  Speaker 2: should- This girl also looked up luxury- Prisons? Prisons. Like,
• 22:44
  Speaker 2: where does a rich person go who gets convicted of
• 22:47
  Speaker 2: murder in prison in Utah?
• 22:48
  Speaker 4: Was it Robert Downey Jr.? Like, I think you can request.
• 22:50
  Speaker 4: I don't think you can.
• 22:51
  Speaker 2: Hi, I have allergies. Can I please go to this one?
• 22:55
  Speaker 4: Do you have a gluten-free menu?
• 22:56
  Speaker 6: Yeah.
• 22:56
  Speaker 4: Do you have something that's not a hot dog?
• 22:58
  Speaker 2: Or bologna?
• 22:59
  Speaker 4: Do you have any of those?
• 23:01
  Speaker 2: I can't eat any processed meats.
• 23:03
  Speaker 7: Yeah. Mm-hmm.
• 23:05
  Speaker 5: I'm on a no nitrate diet in my meats. You
• 23:08
  Speaker 5: remember Natural Born Killers?
• 23:10
  Speaker 2: Yeah.
• 23:11
  Speaker 4: Was it Robert Downey Jr. who played the interviewer? You
• 23:14
  Speaker 4: could go interview them in jail.
• 23:16
  Speaker 2: Yeah.
• 23:17
  Speaker 4: Who would you rather interview, Elizabeth Holmes or Jen Shaw?
• 23:21
  Speaker 2: I mean, now kind of Jen Shaw because all the
• 23:23
  Speaker 2: interviews leading up to it, she would lie about the
• 23:25
  Speaker 2: fact that she ran this business that was so bad.
• 23:28
  Speaker 4: Did she admit it yet?
• 23:30
  Speaker 2: Yeah, she had to admit it because she didn't go
• 23:33
  Speaker 2: to trial. So she did admit it to do less time,
• 23:36
  Speaker 2: which is a lot, still nine years. But no, she
• 23:39
  Speaker 2: ran this whole thing and they had all, I listened
• 23:42
  Speaker 2: to a long podcast that had the voicemails and the
• 23:46
  Speaker 2: conversations and the text messages being read out by actors
• 23:51
  Speaker 2: of how blatant the scam was of getting old people
• 23:56
  Speaker 2: to think that they were going to have this eBay
• 23:58
  Speaker 2: business And then tricking them into spending money on this.
• 24:02
  Speaker 2: And then, you know, it was a complete scam. Like
• 24:04
  Speaker 2: a really bad marketing scam.
• 24:05
  Speaker 5: I think if I went to jail, now that I'm
• 24:06
  Speaker 5: thinking about it, I would try to teach a stand-up class.
• 24:09
  Speaker 2: 100%. No, I would absolutely get the inmates involved in
• 24:13
  Speaker 2: the arts.
• 24:13
  Speaker 4: Yeah, I think so. Podcasting 101.
• 24:15
  Speaker 2: I always thought at first they would be like, who
• 24:17
  Speaker 2: is this, you know... skinny bitch from the valley. Probably
• 24:21
  Speaker 2: first they wouldn't want to be my friend. But once
• 24:24
  Speaker 2: they knew I could imitate the guards and stuff, then
• 24:27
  Speaker 2: we would be good as gold.
• 24:28
  Speaker 4: I think laughter goes a long way. All the skills
• 24:31
  Speaker 4: you learned as.
• 24:32
  Speaker 5: The youngest child, they translate to prison, I think.
• 24:35
  Speaker 2: That being said, I don't want to go.
• 24:38
  Speaker 4: Me neither.
• 24:38
  Speaker 2: Do not want that at all. The car is beautiful.
• 24:42
  Speaker 2: Where did you end up going for it? This exclusive
• 24:45
  Speaker 2: place that Dad has connections with. they have more cars
• 24:47
  Speaker 2: for more dealerships than like anywhere else. You have to
• 24:50
  Speaker 2: put me in touch.
• 24:50
  Speaker 7: What's it called?
• 24:51
  Speaker 6: It's Dune-A-D-L.
• 24:54
  Speaker 4: Where?
• 24:55
  Speaker 2: Dune-A-D-L. There's an accent on the E. Do you mean... Yes,
• 25:00
  Speaker 2: I got it on Dundale Cars.
• 25:01
  Speaker 5: Lift?
• 25:02
  Speaker 2: Please. Are you going past Kimmage? Oh, Kimmage.
• 25:06
  Speaker 3: No.
• 25:07
  Speaker 2: Dundale Cars. You couldn't possibly go anywhere else.
• 25:10
  Speaker 4: I'm Darman, and this is What Happens Next.
• 25:13
  Speaker 7: Each week on the show, I sit down with extraordinary
• 25:16
  Speaker 7: people who have faced tremendous setbacks and yet somehow have
• 25:21
  Speaker 7: found a way to turn them into their greatest strengths.
• 25:24
  Speaker 6: Life is one long lesson of chaos.
• 25:27
  Speaker 3: I'm heading to the Emmys and I have police complaints
• 25:29
  Speaker 3: filed against me. When your free will was about to
• 25:32
  Speaker 3: be taken from you, what would you do if it
• 25:34
  Speaker 3: was given back?
• 25:35
  Speaker 7: Where did that need come from where you thought that
• 25:38
  Speaker 7: you had to succeed in order to feel loved?
• 25:40
  Speaker 4: He said, I have a work dad.
• 25:41
  Speaker 7: I need a home dad.
• 25:43
  Speaker 2: What happens next? When I came in, he started crying.
• 25:45
  Speaker 4: Everybody in life encounters hardships.
• 25:48
  Speaker 7: What defines them is not those hard moments that they
• 25:51
  Speaker 7: go through.
• 25:52
  Speaker 4: It's about what happens next.
• 25:54
  Speaker 2: I decided to risk it all. I realized how valuable
• 25:56
  Speaker 2: every day was. You're worth the work.
• 25:58
  Speaker 4: Listen, Dara, I'm not going to pull punches.
• 26:00
  Speaker 2: You can use your voice even if it shakes.
• 26:02
  Speaker 7: The stories are different, but the impact is the same.
• 26:06
  Speaker 7: Only one question matters. What happens next?
• 26:16
  Speaker 4: I would not.
• 26:17
  Speaker 2: Speaking of Lil Nas, he just didn't want to perform
• 26:21
  Speaker 2: the other day.
• 26:22
  Speaker 3: Huh? That was it.
• 26:24
  Speaker 2: He didn't perform because he didn't feel like it. He said,
• 26:26
  Speaker 2: I had a bad day and I don't want to perform.
• 26:29
  Speaker 4: He had a concert and he didn't go?
• 26:30
  Speaker 2: Can you look this up really quick? Or Jacob. I'm
• 26:34
  Speaker 2: not totally sure. I read this quickly. But why we
• 26:38
  Speaker 2: look that up.
• 26:39
  Speaker 4: Have you ever done that?
• 26:41
  Speaker 2: Never, ever.
• 26:41
  Speaker 4: I would never.
• 26:43
  Speaker 2: Ever.
• 26:43
  Speaker 4: Because you know what I would think? This will be
• 26:45
  Speaker 4: the last show I ever do.
• 26:46
  Speaker 2: There's been times where mostly when I just don't want
• 26:50
  Speaker 2: to pack because I have a very hard time picking
• 26:51
  Speaker 2: out a good stand-up outfit still to this day. I
• 26:53
  Speaker 2: was trying on outfits for Drake. Fully dressed, I'd walk out.
• 26:57
  Speaker 2: And I was like, is this too like the lady
• 27:00
  Speaker 2: in Hacks? Yeah. Like, no, no, just now because we're
• 27:02
  Speaker 2: going to Tempe this weekend. And he's coming with me
• 27:06
  Speaker 2: because he's going to look at houses for himself to
• 27:08
  Speaker 2: rent and he can help me write notes and stuff.
• 27:10
  Speaker 2: But anyway, so I was like, Is this cool? Like,
• 27:13
  Speaker 2: I think I should be a little dressed up, but
• 27:14
  Speaker 2: at the same time, it's a little like I'm getting
• 27:17
  Speaker 2: to that age where I look like the woman in Hacks, you.
• 27:19
  Speaker 4: Know what I mean?
• 27:20
  Speaker 2: It's so... So it's a fine line, but then I
• 27:22
  Speaker 2: don't want to be that girl that's, like, dressing too
• 27:24
  Speaker 2: sloppy because.
• 27:25
  Speaker 4: He's on the road with me.
• 27:26
  Speaker 7: Yeah.
• 27:26
  Speaker 5: And I ask him the same questions. I'm like, are
• 27:27
  Speaker 5: these jeans too tight? And sometimes he's like, those jeans
• 27:29
  Speaker 5: are too tight. Or should I wear this shirt?
• 27:31
  Speaker 4: He's... That's the... That's his role also.
• 27:34
  Speaker 2: Okay, this is a little nauseous scoop, okay, for him.
• 27:36
  Speaker 2: At least this girl is interested in.
• 27:38
  Speaker 3: Him, the one that.
• 27:40
  Speaker 2: Could be her husband.
• 27:41
  Speaker 6: The.
• 27:42
  Speaker 2: Okay, he left the stage for about five to ten
• 27:44
  Speaker 2: minutes at the beginning of the show due to technical difficulties.
• 27:47
  Speaker 2: After explaining the tech issues, he said he had a
• 27:49
  Speaker 2: bad day and just didn't want to do it. Lil
• 27:53
  Speaker 2: Nas X then performed very begrudgingly, and it was a
• 27:57
  Speaker 2: total downer. I mean, he could be a downer in
• 28:01
  Speaker 2: this outfit. Other sources who attended the concert told us
• 28:04
  Speaker 2: that Lil Nas X dancers partially had to carry the
• 28:07
  Speaker 2: show for the Old Town Road singer because ongoing issues
• 28:10
  Speaker 2: with his mic. We're told he was looking forward to
• 28:12
  Speaker 2: performing at the fest but grew frustrated on Sunday after
• 28:14
  Speaker 2: experiencing the technical snafus. That I can relate to being
• 28:18
  Speaker 2: annoyed when there's something not right. There are a lot
• 28:20
  Speaker 2: of logistics that were off. Okay, so basically that's it.
• 28:23
  Speaker 4: Do you know where Eric Church is? The country singer
• 28:26
  Speaker 4: Eric Church?
• 28:26
  Speaker 2: Okay, yeah, yeah.
• 28:27
  Speaker 5: A couple years ago, North Carolina played Duke in a
• 28:31
  Speaker 5: basketball game. It's a huge game, right? I think he
• 28:34
  Speaker 5: was a fan of one of the two teams.
• 28:35
  Speaker 4: He had a show. I think he had sold 40,000 tickets.
• 28:38
  Speaker 2: I think I remember the story, yeah.
• 28:39
  Speaker 5: Remember, and he canceled because it was a once-in-a-lifetime game
• 28:42
  Speaker 5: that he wanted to go to with his family.
• 28:47
  Speaker 4: Where do you fall on that?
• 28:49
  Speaker 5: Okay.
• 28:50
  Speaker 4: First of all, I'm going to take my kid. It
• 28:53
  Speaker 4: was for him. Of course.
• 28:54
  Speaker 3: There's no doubt. Of course it was for him.
• 28:55
  Speaker 2: Of course.
• 28:56
  Speaker 3: Of course.
• 28:56
  Speaker 2: But that's always the thing you can throw in. For sure.
• 28:58
  Speaker 2: Like as your kid is like, your kid is hardly like,
• 29:01
  Speaker 2: you know, they haven't had a lot of great experiences
• 29:04
  Speaker 2: being that their dad's the number one country singer. Yeah. Okay.
• 29:06
  Speaker 4: And kids are great excuses to get out of shit
• 29:08
  Speaker 4: by the way.
• 29:08
  Speaker 2: But you know, it's your big team, blah, blah, blah, blah.
• 29:10
  Speaker 2: I'm just saying if a woman did that, if I
• 29:13
  Speaker 2: was doing a standup show and I was like, guys,
• 29:17
  Speaker 2: I'm sorry, but my really fabulous friend, her yacht just
• 29:21
  Speaker 2: got finished being made.
• 29:22
  Speaker 6: Yeah.
• 29:23
  Speaker 2: And we're going to Mykonos.
• 29:24
  Speaker 4: So I'm sorry it's a once in a lifetime thing.
• 29:28
  Speaker 2: Drake wants to golf in Greece. I'm sorry, I'm not
• 29:33
  Speaker 2: doing the show. destroy me and they'd be like her
• 29:39
  Speaker 2: kids a little shit and she all she cares about
• 29:42
  Speaker 2: is materialistic stuff it would be completely different I.
• 29:44
  Speaker 5: Think he got wrecked online I think there was a
• 29:46
  Speaker 5: big yeah I think there was a lot of people
• 29:48
  Speaker 5: who were like we bought tickets here's the thing that
• 29:51
  Speaker 5: that a lot of us forget not only people buying
• 29:53
  Speaker 5: tickets But for a show like that, people are flying
• 29:56
  Speaker 5: in from out of, they're getting hotels, they're getting babysitters,
• 30:00
  Speaker 5: they've already spent all of this money.
• 30:03
  Speaker 2: Look, it is really hard to walk out, and I mean,
• 30:06
  Speaker 2: this has happened to me, where something happens, bad news,
• 30:10
  Speaker 2: or now, if I'm in any kind of mood or
• 30:13
  Speaker 2: arguing with Peter or whatever, I will be like, I
• 30:16
  Speaker 2: have to perform in a few hours, goodbye. But there's
• 30:19
  Speaker 2: been times where like, That's happening. And you have to
• 30:22
  Speaker 2: go on stage and then tell these funny, cute stories
• 30:24
  Speaker 2: about your family. But that is our job as a performer.
• 30:27
  Speaker 4: And I'm sure there's.
• 30:27
  Speaker 2: People that work at Nordstrom or McDonald's that wake up
• 30:31
  Speaker 2: and are not really in the mood to do their
• 30:32
  Speaker 2: job either. Too bad. That's what you have to do.
• 30:35
  Speaker 2: Suck it up.
• 30:37
  Speaker 5: Listen, for me, I could never be like, yeah, dude,
• 30:40
  Speaker 5: I want to go to this game. I'm going to
• 30:41
  Speaker 5: cancel this.
• 30:42
  Speaker 4: It's hard. I'm trying to think. Obviously, we all canceled
• 30:45
  Speaker 4: shows over COVID or whatever. But I've walked out. I
• 30:48
  Speaker 4: was in.
• 30:50
  Speaker 5: Connecticut at the Mohegan sun. And I legit had 103
• 30:54
  Speaker 5: degree temperature. And I was in my hotel room and
• 30:57
  Speaker 5: the guy was like, I'm going to cancel the show.
• 30:58
  Speaker 5: And I was like, I'm here.
• 31:00
  Speaker 4: Like what?
• 31:00
  Speaker 5: I can either be alone and miserable in my room
• 31:03
  Speaker 5: or miserable on stage. I'm just going to be miserable
• 31:06
  Speaker 5: on stage.
• 31:07
  Speaker 4: Like if I'm already there.
• 31:08
  Speaker 2: Did you even have someone give you like a Justin Bieber,
• 31:10
  Speaker 2: like B12 shot or something?
• 31:12
  Speaker 5: I know that first night was a blur. That first
• 31:16
  Speaker 5: night was a straight, and.
• 31:18
  Speaker 4: I thought, I was like, you know what I'm gonna
• 31:20
  Speaker 4: try to do? Maybe weed'll help. It did not. It
• 31:23
  Speaker 4: definitely fogged everything right up.
• 31:25
  Speaker 2: Well, what I feted on stage at the Tempe Improv,
• 31:28
  Speaker 2: which my triumphant return, already happened once, because I had
• 31:31
  Speaker 2: to make up those two sold-out shows, but now I'm
• 31:33
  Speaker 2: coming back. You know, the first when I opened my eyes,
• 31:37
  Speaker 2: I was like, oh, this is going to be hard
• 31:39
  Speaker 2: to finish the show. The guy's like, no, we canceled it.
• 31:42
  Speaker 2: I go, OK, but then we'll just do the 930.
• 31:45
  Speaker 2: He's like, no. Yeah. And you have to go to
• 31:47
  Speaker 2: the hospital. And then Drake was in the audience. And,
• 31:51
  Speaker 2: you know, the ambulance, they called the ambulance as they should.
• 31:54
  Speaker 2: You know, they don't know if I'm having a stroke
• 31:55
  Speaker 2: or dying, but I just fainted. And yeah. and Drake
• 31:59
  Speaker 2: was like, dad will kill us if we go in
• 32:02
  Speaker 2: the ambulance. Absolutely not, absolutely not. And then his equally
• 32:07
  Speaker 2: cheap sister was there, and she's like, I'm driving her.
• 32:15
  Speaker 4: I love that you were like, can't afford it. No,
• 32:17
  Speaker 4: absolutely not.
• 32:19
  Speaker 2: Absolutely not.
• 32:21
  Speaker 4: Because I'm sure the club called an ambulance, right?
• 32:23
  Speaker 2: Of course they did. And the ambulance drivers, very cute.
• 32:27
  Speaker 2: And they were like, you know, who's the president and
• 32:29
  Speaker 2: all this other stuff. And I'm like answering it. And
• 32:33
  Speaker 2: they're like, okay, but you have to sign this thing
• 32:35
  Speaker 2: because we highly recommend that you go in the ambulance
• 32:37
  Speaker 2: with us. And I'm like, no, I know it costs
• 32:39
  Speaker 2: like $ 3, 000. And Drake is like, absolutely not. Yeah. No,
• 32:43
  Speaker 2: I'm here. I'm here to take over, and she is
• 32:46
  Speaker 2: fine to sit in the back seat of the car
• 32:47
  Speaker 2: with me. And we got there, and I did survive.
• 32:52
  Speaker 4: That is amazing. You always wonder what the kids pick
• 32:56
  Speaker 4: up from which parent. Do you know what I mean?
• 33:00
  Speaker 2: I mean, I gave birth so that Peter could have
• 33:02
  Speaker 2: a best friend. That's the only thing.
• 33:04
  Speaker 6: Yeah.
• 33:04
  Speaker 4: I mean, I feel like that kind of happened.
• 33:06
  Speaker 2: With me also. Yeah. Drake, both the kids have qualities,
• 33:10
  Speaker 2: both of us.
• 33:11
  Speaker 7: Yeah.
• 33:11
  Speaker 6: Yeah.
• 33:11
  Speaker 2: So I see the qualities.
• 33:12
  Speaker 4: What has he got of yours?
• 33:15
  Speaker 2: He does not get upset easily. He gets over stuff quickly.
• 33:19
  Speaker 2: Like if he does get upset, he gets over stuff quickly,
• 33:21
  Speaker 2: which is me. That's a great skill, by the way.
• 33:24
  Speaker 2: He has a good sense of humor. And he does
• 33:27
  Speaker 2: enjoy juicy scoop. He does enjoy me telling a story
• 33:31
  Speaker 2: and we can talk the whole way on a drive.
• 33:34
  Speaker 2: about stuff, so I like that. For a straight boy,
• 33:38
  Speaker 2: I'm impressed.
• 33:38
  Speaker 5: That I have that. Sam in Vegas, he loves the show.
• 33:41
  Speaker 5: That live show, by the way, was so fun.
• 33:44
  Speaker 2: Oh yeah, you guys came, thank you for coming.
• 33:45
  Speaker 4: It was so fun.
• 33:47
  Speaker 5: And I love, and this is just me and my
• 33:51
  Speaker 5: own personal bias, I love watching you and Chris.
• 33:54
  Speaker 2: I know, it's the best.
• 33:55
  Speaker 5: I love watching you and Chris. You have great shorthand
• 33:59
  Speaker 5: on stage, but those old clips of you guys.
• 34:03
  Speaker 4: are just so good.
• 34:04
  Speaker 2: We shared the old clips. Hopefully, it's too late now.
• 34:06
  Speaker 2: You can't buy the streamer. I hope you did. But no,
• 34:08
  Speaker 2: we had some of those old clips, and they were so,
• 34:11
  Speaker 2: I mean, it made it really fun. I'll share more
• 34:13
  Speaker 2: of those in the future. But okay, let's move on
• 34:15
  Speaker 2: to the next topic.
• 34:17
  Speaker 4: Okay.
• 34:18
  Speaker 2: Again, interesting about your life. I don't know how much
• 34:20
  Speaker 2: you want to share. But this girl and this guy,
• 34:22
  Speaker 2: they were married. She was a real housewife of Atlanta.
• 34:25
  Speaker 2: He was a former football player, a few years younger
• 34:28
  Speaker 2: than she. She had two kids from previous relationships. They
• 34:31
  Speaker 2: had four together. Their whole persona was, they had TV
• 34:35
  Speaker 2: shows and everything about how in love they were, how
• 34:37
  Speaker 2: he catered to her, so much in love, tons of
• 34:40
  Speaker 2: Photoshop photos of my hot husband, my hot wife. They
• 34:44
  Speaker 2: announced they're getting divorced. Pretty shocking. I mean, nobody saw
• 34:47
  Speaker 2: it coming. Some people wonder if it was fake. It's
• 34:49
  Speaker 2: unfortunately not fake. It's very contentious divorce. He is now
• 34:55
  Speaker 2: saying he wants a guardian for the kids while they're separated. First,
• 34:59
  Speaker 2: he wants full custody. But in the meantime, he wants
• 35:02
  Speaker 2: a court-appointed guardian because he's afraid she's going to go
• 35:04
  Speaker 2: on the show back on Atlanta Housewives and talk about them.
• 35:09
  Speaker 2: He says she's abusive. He says she drinks and she
• 35:12
  Speaker 2: gambles too much. that she's a reckless driver, all this stuff,
• 35:15
  Speaker 2: and that she physically assaulted him. So he did the,
• 35:20
  Speaker 2: you know, I'm filing a restraining order.
• 35:21
  Speaker 7: Yeah.
• 35:22
  Speaker 2: And he's a former football player, and, you know, okay.
• 35:25
  Speaker 2: And so this is just a whole ugly thing that's
• 35:28
  Speaker 2: happening between the two of them.
• 35:30
  Speaker 4: What's his name? Do we know?
• 35:31
  Speaker 2: Croy Berman.
• 35:32
  Speaker 4: Okay. Not a huge football star, I don't think, right?
• 35:36
  Speaker 2: I mean, I'm pretty sure... shortly after they got married,
• 35:40
  Speaker 2: I don't even, maybe two years in, he then stopped playing.
• 35:42
  Speaker 4: Got it, got it, got it.
• 35:43
  Speaker 2: And then, you know, they had all the shows and
• 35:45
  Speaker 2: all the stuff, but she did gamble. He showed, there's
• 35:48
  Speaker 2: court things that people have pulled up where she spent $ 127, 000
• 35:51
  Speaker 2: in one month.
• 35:52
  Speaker 4: Gambling?
• 35:53
  Speaker 2: Online gambling stuff.
• 35:54
  Speaker 5: See, but this is stuff like, do you think this
• 35:57
  Speaker 5: is all a surprise to him?
• 35:59
  Speaker 4: Like, do you.
• 36:00
  Speaker 2: Know what I mean?
• 36:00
  Speaker 5: Like, She hid all this stuff going in? Do you
• 36:05
  Speaker 5: think some of it, they had fun, party people together?
• 36:08
  Speaker 2: I think he was totally whipped and completely under her
• 36:12
  Speaker 2: spell and put up with it, put up with it.
• 36:15
  Speaker 6: And.
• 36:16
  Speaker 2: Then they started having severe money problems, foreclosure stuff, owing
• 36:19
  Speaker 2: a million dollars. And then the show stopped so they
• 36:23
  Speaker 2: didn't have to keep performing. And then I just think
• 36:25
  Speaker 2: all the truth came out. And then I think it
• 36:27
  Speaker 2: got to a place that was so ugly that they
• 36:29
  Speaker 2: both had maybe fallen out of love with each other
• 36:31
  Speaker 2: and they finally said all the ugly shit. And then
• 36:33
  Speaker 2: there was no coming back. And she's just like, F off.
• 36:37
  Speaker 2: And he's like, oh my God, I've given up. He
• 36:40
  Speaker 2: doesn't talk to his parents. He doesn't, you know, all
• 36:43
  Speaker 2: this stuff. So now... Yeah, it's a big, big mess.
• 36:47
  Speaker 4: Can I tell you what I really think?
• 36:48
  Speaker 2: And their kids are like 11 and 9 and 10.
• 36:51
  Speaker 4: This is the thing.
• 36:53
  Speaker 5: Whatever you're going to do with each other, when.
• 36:56
  Speaker 4: You start airing, you have kids, you start.
• 36:58
  Speaker 5: Airing that shit in public, I think you're both bad people.
• 37:02
  Speaker 5: I think you're both self-serving, egotistical people. Because at the
• 37:06
  Speaker 5: end of the day, it should be about, okay, we're
• 37:08
  Speaker 5: going to split up, but let's not drag them.
• 37:10
  Speaker 2: Through it also. Well, in their defense... These are public records.
• 37:14
  Speaker 2: They're not necessarily... But.
• 37:16
  Speaker 4: They're talking about it.
• 37:17
  Speaker 2: A little bit, not totally. Not totally on Instagram and stuff,
• 37:20
  Speaker 2: but people are writing stuff about it because they are
• 37:24
  Speaker 2: public figures.
• 37:25
  Speaker 4: Yeah.
• 37:25
  Speaker 2: But they are going this route of, Mutual restraining orders,
• 37:29
  Speaker 2: and he locked me out, and he's stealing this from me. No,
• 37:31
  Speaker 2: she's stealing me this from me. They're tit for tat
• 37:33
  Speaker 2: going back. I want all the kids. She said, I
• 37:35
  Speaker 2: want him tested for weed because he smokes weed. I
• 37:38
  Speaker 2: want to take a piece of his hair. I don't
• 37:40
  Speaker 2: think he's a good enough dad. And then she always
• 37:43
  Speaker 2: has a Chardonnay and a Red Solo cup. Oh, no,
• 37:45
  Speaker 2: she's a boozer. So it's like, yeah.
• 37:48
  Speaker 4: Can I tell you, Beth locked me out once. Well,
• 37:53
  Speaker 4: on her birthday, we were in San Francisco.
• 37:56
  Speaker 2: Yeah.
• 37:57
  Speaker 5: And she came home. She was like, I'm going to
• 37:59
  Speaker 5: go home early. I don't want to stick around for
• 38:01
  Speaker 5: the late show.
• 38:02
  Speaker 2: Oh, you're doing stand-up there.
• 38:03
  Speaker 4: Stand-up's there. Who does? Just kidding. What's that?
• 38:06
  Speaker 2: Who does want to stick around for the late show?
• 38:08
  Speaker 4: Right, yeah, not even me.
• 38:09
  Speaker 5: And so she goes, I'm going to go back to
• 38:12
  Speaker 5: the hotel. Well, she went back to the hotel and
• 38:14
  Speaker 5: deadbolted the door.
• 38:15
  Speaker 2: Okay.
• 38:16
  Speaker 4: So I couldn't get in. So I go down to
• 38:19
  Speaker 4: the front desk.
• 38:20
  Speaker 7: Yeah.
• 38:20
  Speaker 4: And I'm like, hey. She deadbolted the door, and he
• 38:23
  Speaker 4: was like, I don't know what to do. I go,
• 38:24
  Speaker 4: can you get maintenance or something? He was like, well,
• 38:26
  Speaker 4: you want us to take- Because she's dead asleep? Dead asleep.
• 38:28
  Speaker 2: Okay.
• 38:29
  Speaker 4: And so I had to rent another room, right? And
• 38:34
  Speaker 4: stay in that room. I woke up to angry texts
• 38:37
  Speaker 4: from her. Oh, on my birthday, you decided to stay
• 38:41
  Speaker 4: out all night? I mean, it was like a list.
• 38:44
  Speaker 2: Ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding.
• 38:45
  Speaker 3: Oh, you're out?
• 38:46
  Speaker 4: Where the fuck are you? Were you out all night
• 38:47
  Speaker 4: for my birthday?
• 38:48
  Speaker 5: And I was like, check the door. And then two
• 38:51
  Speaker 5: seconds later, I got a text that said, my bad.
• 38:54
  Speaker 5: But she thought I had stayed out all night on
• 38:58
  Speaker 5: her birthday because she.
• 38:59
  Speaker 4: Had decided to come. Just because I don't want to
• 39:01
  Speaker 4: stick around and see your late show. And she started,
• 39:03
  Speaker 4: she was like, I've seen that set a hundred times.
• 39:05
  Speaker 4: I need to see it.
• 39:08
  Speaker 2: I don't know if you'll remember this, but we were
• 39:09
  Speaker 2: on the road with Chelsea. We were drinking on a
• 39:14
  Speaker 2: crazy night, but whatever, drinking, eating. And I'm like, I'm
• 39:17
  Speaker 2: going to go to bed. And I don't know, sometimes
• 39:20
  Speaker 2: I just do that. My friends say I like abruptly
• 39:22
  Speaker 2: just like end the night. I go, I'm gonna go
• 39:23
  Speaker 2: to bed. So I go to my room and I
• 39:26
  Speaker 2: didn't double lock it. I just, whatever, locked normal i'm
• 39:29
  Speaker 2: completely asleep i do remember this and i fucking you
• 39:36
  Speaker 2: guys came into my room and i literally had that
• 39:39
  Speaker 2: moment like this is the end yeah i will get
• 39:42
  Speaker 2: raped and murdered i remember the end yeah And you,
• 39:45
  Speaker 2: what were you guys able to just, because she's Chelsea,
• 39:47
  Speaker 2: you just able to get the key to my room
• 39:49
  Speaker 2: because she was paying for it?
• 39:50
  Speaker 4: Is that the craziest thing?
• 39:51
  Speaker 5: She went to the front desk and we were there.
• 39:53
  Speaker 5: We went to the front desk and she was like,
• 39:55
  Speaker 5: I'd like to get into room, whatever, 302. And the
• 39:59
  Speaker 5: woman checked and she was like, that's not your room.
• 40:00
  Speaker 5: She was like, yeah, but somebody I know is staying
• 40:02
  Speaker 5: in that room.
• 40:03
  Speaker 4: I'd like the key. And the lady was like, okay.
• 40:06
  Speaker 4: That was it.
• 40:06
  Speaker 5: I was like, is it that easy for a famous
• 40:09
  Speaker 5: person to get any hotel room key they wanted?
• 40:13
  Speaker 2: It was.
• 40:13
  Speaker 4: She was just like, okay. Gave her the key. We
• 40:15
  Speaker 4: got a hotel escort up to the room that wasn't ours.
• 40:19
  Speaker 6: Yeah.
• 40:19
  Speaker 4: And the guy waited out there for us.
• 40:22
  Speaker 2: It was just to scare me, right?
• 40:23
  Speaker 4: Just to scare you, yeah.
• 40:24
  Speaker 3: Yeah, that's nice.
• 40:26
  Speaker 4: There was one time.
• 40:27
  Speaker 2: As I'm away from my family making a living. And then,
• 40:30
  Speaker 2: of course, you have to go along with it, like,
• 40:32
  Speaker 2: you know, because it's just like a cult thing.
• 40:34
  Speaker 4: You had to pretend like it was fun? L.
• 40:36
  Speaker 2: Ron Hubbard told you to do it.
• 40:37
  Speaker 5: Do you remember Jeff Wills? Jeff Wills, who one night
• 40:40
  Speaker 5: we were in. You were there for this.
• 40:42
  Speaker 4: We were in Seattle.
• 40:44
  Speaker 5: Yeah. Wills had gone to bed. It was me, you, Brad,
• 40:47
  Speaker 5: and Chelsea. And she called, woke him up in the
• 40:50
  Speaker 5: middle of the night because we were upstairs in her
• 40:53
  Speaker 5: room doing whatever.
• 40:54
  Speaker 2: Yeah.
• 40:55
  Speaker 4: And he came up. She opened the door. He was like,
• 40:57
  Speaker 4: what is it? What is it?
• 40:59
  Speaker 5: She opened the door, slammed like a pie in his face.
• 41:03
  Speaker 4: Shut the door, and then just never went back to
• 41:05
  Speaker 4: the door again.
• 41:06
  Speaker 2: Well, when that's what your top client.
• 41:08
  Speaker 4: Does, you go to your room.
• 41:10
  Speaker 2: And you go in the shower and you watch that
• 41:12
  Speaker 2: cat take off.
• 41:12
  Speaker 4: That's what he did. Yeah, yeah, that was pretty crazy.
• 41:16
  Speaker 2: When people go, what's Hollywood really like? That's what it's
• 41:20
  Speaker 2: really like, you guys. You know what? You don't say
• 41:23
  Speaker 2: anything when someone's paying the bills.
• 41:25
  Speaker 4: That one with Wills made me laugh because he.
• 41:28
  Speaker 2: Well, sure, it made you laugh. I don't think he
• 41:32
  Speaker 2: was laughing the whipped cream out of his nostrils.
• 41:34
  Speaker 4: He did look disappointed.
• 41:36
  Speaker 3: He was like, is this it?
• 41:37
  Speaker 5: And she just shut the door and I was like, wow,
• 41:38
  Speaker 5: that was pretty well played. I honestly, I have to
• 41:43
  Speaker 5: tell you, this type of... The elevation of two people
• 41:48
  Speaker 5: who I would have never... heard of before. It reminds
• 41:51
  Speaker 5: me of, I asked him the other day, I'm like,
• 41:53
  Speaker 5: who's this dude with the mustache that I'm seeing all
• 41:57
  Speaker 5: over my, why do I know something about him? But
• 42:00
  Speaker 5: we're elevating people for doing terrible things.
• 42:04
  Speaker 2: Yeah.
• 42:04
  Speaker 4: Or do you know what I mean? It's such a
• 42:06
  Speaker 4: weird thing. The reason we know mustache dude.
• 42:09
  Speaker 2: Well, with that, and people are very glad, in other words,
• 42:12
  Speaker 2: it will not be a Vanderpump episode because I've talked
• 42:14
  Speaker 2: a lot about it. But really why that was just
• 42:17
  Speaker 2: went crazy is because it was just a real story
• 42:21
  Speaker 2: about a couple that had been together nine years and
• 42:25
  Speaker 2: her best friend who was in the friend group was
• 42:28
  Speaker 2: sleeping with her boyfriend behind her back for seven months.
• 42:33
  Speaker 2: And you could just talk about that forever.
• 42:35
  Speaker 4: Right.
• 42:35
  Speaker 2: Either it's happened to you or you know somebody or,
• 42:38
  Speaker 2: you know, you can sympathize with one side or whatever. Right.
• 42:42
  Speaker 2: And it just sparked so much conversation for so many months.
• 42:45
  Speaker 2: And that is why it became huge. It wasn't necessarily
• 42:48
  Speaker 2: like the greatest show on earth. It just sparked such
• 42:53
  Speaker 2: an interesting conversation.
• 42:55
  Speaker 4: That's why. Yeah.
• 42:57
  Speaker 5: It's weird, though, that we end up elevating people who
• 43:00
  Speaker 5: otherwise we would never talk about because they're doing shitty things.
• 43:04
  Speaker 2: I just think with this... This is the classic of, again,
• 43:09
  Speaker 2: I feel like the reason I talk about this type
• 43:11
  Speaker 2: of stuff is it can always be related to somebody
• 43:14
  Speaker 2: that's not famous at home.
• 43:15
  Speaker 4: That's true.
• 43:16
  Speaker 2: And now that everybody has, you know, Facebook and Instagram
• 43:19
  Speaker 2: and everything, and there's those people that constantly brag about
• 43:23
  Speaker 2: their spouse and their love for each other. And I've
• 43:27
  Speaker 2: made jokes about it where it's the long diatribe of,
• 43:30
  Speaker 2: you know, our anniversary, you know, and it's like 14
• 43:34
  Speaker 2: years ago today. I married my best friend. And so
• 43:38
  Speaker 2: I used to talk about it in my act where
• 43:40
  Speaker 2: I literally one time did one that year for our anniversary.
• 43:44
  Speaker 2: And I was really honest about it. And I was like,
• 43:46
  Speaker 2: 14 years ago today, I was 29, and my mom
• 43:50
  Speaker 2: told me my eggs were drying up. Two weeks later,
• 43:54
  Speaker 2: I married you. Because you had a condo.
• 44:00
  Speaker 3: Yeah. And you were good with money.
• 44:03
  Speaker 2: And I was $ 18, 000 in credit card debt from buying
• 44:06
  Speaker 2: costume and wigs for the Groundlings. Like, no. And then
• 44:09
  Speaker 2: I'm like, and then 15 years later, it's okay.
• 44:11
  Speaker 4: We're still doing all right.
• 44:12
  Speaker 2: Our kids are tall.
• 44:15
  Speaker 4: Yeah, we see each other every day.
• 44:16
  Speaker 2: Yeah.
• 44:17
  Speaker 4: We don't hate each other most days.
• 44:19
  Speaker 2: Yeah, we both drink. It's fine.
• 44:21
  Speaker 4: I will tell you, Beth is a very sentimental woman.
• 44:25
  Speaker 2: Yes, she is.
• 44:26
  Speaker 4: So she wants posts.
• 44:29
  Speaker 2: Yeah.
• 44:29
  Speaker 4: And I'm always like, I don't know what else.
• 44:32
  Speaker 5: She was like, and don't post anything you've already posted.
• 44:34
  Speaker 4: I'm like, I don't know what else to say 20
• 44:37
  Speaker 4: years in. Yeah.
• 44:39
  Speaker 5: I haven't said great ass yet, but I don't think
• 44:41
  Speaker 5: that's the post you're looking for.
• 44:43
  Speaker 2: Do you know what I mean? Oh, yes, it is. Oh, yes,
• 44:47
  Speaker 2: it is. Please do that.
• 44:48
  Speaker 4: That's what I'm doing now.
• 44:49
  Speaker 3: Yes.
• 44:49
  Speaker 4: For her birthday. That's what I'm doing.
• 44:50
  Speaker 3: Just say this ass.
• 44:52
  Speaker 2: You know, a lot of people, there's always this post, too,
• 44:54
  Speaker 2: where it's, like, these dramatic things where it's, like, a
• 44:56
  Speaker 2: woman's hands or a thirsty one where she, like, shows, like,
• 44:59
  Speaker 2: a cellulite. But it's, like, she has a perfect body
• 45:00
  Speaker 2: and it's, like, one dimple. And it's, like, yeah, I
• 45:03
  Speaker 2: have cellulite. But this cellulite body carried three children.
• 45:07
  Speaker 4: That's right.
• 45:07
  Speaker 2: It's built a business. It's made a meal. It's taken
• 45:11
  Speaker 2: my mother's to chemo. And everyone's, like, you're right.
• 45:13
  Speaker 3: Who criticized that dimple?
• 45:15
  Speaker 2: And you're just, like, you know. So you have to
• 45:16
  Speaker 2: write one, like, this ass. And get a good photo
• 45:19
  Speaker 2: of hers because she does have a good ass. This
• 45:21
  Speaker 2: ass has, you know, and then it's just like traveled
• 45:24
  Speaker 2: the world with me, taken photos of me, stayed for
• 45:27
  Speaker 2: the late show, locked me out of the room, accused
• 45:29
  Speaker 2: me of cheating. This ass is worth it.
• 45:32
  Speaker 3: Just whatever.
• 45:33
  Speaker 4: That's a great one. And she does have a great ass.
• 45:34
  Speaker 5: By the way, if I'm being honest, and I'm 53,
• 45:39
  Speaker 5: my ass has never looked better.
• 45:41
  Speaker 2: Congrats.
• 45:41
  Speaker 4: I don't know what's going on, but it's up there
• 45:44
  Speaker 4: right now. I'm feeling pretty good, right, Jakey?
• 45:49
  Speaker 2: We can only get better. OK, here's here's I always
• 45:52
  Speaker 2: thought this was so interesting. So Tallulah Willis, who is
• 45:55
  Speaker 2: the daughter of Bruce Willis and Demi Moore, former stepdaughter
• 45:59
  Speaker 2: of Ashton Kutcher. She recently spoke about feeling forgotten amid
• 46:04
  Speaker 2: her mom's marriage. I always thought there were so many
• 46:08
  Speaker 2: photos where these kids would be like the girls were
• 46:11
  Speaker 2: just looking up. Remember, there was so much press about
• 46:13
  Speaker 2: how he's the greatest stepdaughter on Earth. how he loves
• 46:16
  Speaker 2: being a dad to these girls, but he was significantly
• 46:19
  Speaker 2: young to be a stepdad, which you can kind of
• 46:22
  Speaker 2: relate to. But anyway, she says, it was like 2003,
• 46:25
  Speaker 2: and my mom had just started dating Ashton, and I
• 46:28
  Speaker 2: really went inside myself. That did send me into like
• 46:30
  Speaker 2: a total dumpster fire. It was really hard, a lot
• 46:33
  Speaker 2: to unpack. And then Ashton, on becoming a stepfather, said,
• 46:37
  Speaker 2: I was 26, bearing the responsibility of an 8-year-old, a 10-year-old,
• 46:39
  Speaker 2: and a 12-year-old. He also said on his divorce to Moore,
• 46:44
  Speaker 2: a whole... A wholesale fucking failure, so it didn't end nicely.
• 46:48
  Speaker 2: And then she said, Tallulah said, in the past, I
• 46:50
  Speaker 2: was so afraid of being destroyed by sadness, but finally
• 46:53
  Speaker 2: feel that I could show up and be relied upon. Okay,
• 46:56
  Speaker 2: so anyway, she's- Look at that guy right there. Now
• 47:00
  Speaker 2: that her dad is sick and everything, this is probably
• 47:02
  Speaker 2: why it's come up to the story. But yeah, there
• 47:05
  Speaker 2: were so many pictures where some of the older girls
• 47:07
  Speaker 2: would be like, I'm like, I mean, your stepdad is
• 47:10
  Speaker 2: like 10 years older than you and freaking hot as shit.
• 47:14
  Speaker 5: When you look at that guy, you're like, I bet
• 47:16
  Speaker 5: he's a good dad. That picture right there of that guy,
• 47:18
  Speaker 5: you're like, oh, he wants to be a dad.
• 47:20
  Speaker 3: No.
• 47:20
  Speaker 2: I think he was.
• 47:22
  Speaker 5: I'm sure, but at 26, you look this way, and
• 47:26
  Speaker 5: you're Ashton Kutcher.
• 47:27
  Speaker 2: Okay, I remember Guy Branum was in that. Guy Branum
• 47:30
  Speaker 2: was in a movie with Ashton Kutcher and Natalie Portman,
• 47:34
  Speaker 2: and he took me to the premiere of it, and
• 47:36
  Speaker 2: we were hanging out with Scout, I think it was,
• 47:39
  Speaker 2: and one of the daughters, and and Demi was there
• 47:43
  Speaker 2: and Ashton was there and everything. And somehow he ended
• 47:45
  Speaker 2: up in a car ride going to the next party
• 47:48
  Speaker 2: with Ashton Kutcher. And he said he was talking and
• 47:51
  Speaker 2: Demi and the girls were so like in awe of
• 47:55
  Speaker 2: everything he said. They were very like, he's the man,
• 47:58
  Speaker 2: he knows everything, he's very respectful. And I read Demi's
• 48:01
  Speaker 2: book and it was very much like that. You would
• 48:04
  Speaker 2: think that maybe because she was experienced like older woman,
• 48:07
  Speaker 2: it wasn't. It was like they really made him like
• 48:10
  Speaker 2: the man of the house. And, you know.
• 48:13
  Speaker 4: As somebody who had kids young... So tell your.
• 48:17
  Speaker 2: Just for people that don't know how you ended up
• 48:19
  Speaker 2: with your kids.
• 48:20
  Speaker 4: I met a woman.
• 48:20
  Speaker 5: She had two kids. And then we had a child
• 48:24
  Speaker 5: together who's sitting right there. And then when we split up,
• 48:28
  Speaker 5: I kept the kids. The two older kids and Jakey.
• 48:32
  Speaker 2: And she was okay with that? That was the best
• 48:34
  Speaker 2: for the kids? And she agreed?
• 48:36
  Speaker 6: Yes.
• 48:36
  Speaker 2: And the father agreed?
• 48:38
  Speaker 4: The father... I've met one time in my life.
• 48:41
  Speaker 2: Okay, but he didn't have a problem with it.
• 48:42
  Speaker 4: He didn't have a say. Okay, all right. He didn't
• 48:44
  Speaker 4: have a say.
• 48:45
  Speaker 2: Okay.
• 48:45
  Speaker 5: At the time, he wasn't paying child support. He would
• 48:50
  Speaker 5: send birthday cards with checks for $ 15 that bounced.
• 48:55
  Speaker 4: Like, it was like a.
• 48:57
  Speaker 5: It was just a disaster. But I will tell you,
• 49:00
  Speaker 5: as a young... There's positives and negatives to the young
• 49:03
  Speaker 5: parenting thing.
• 49:03
  Speaker 7: Yeah.
• 49:04
  Speaker 4: For me, the positives was the energy.
• 49:06
  Speaker 7: Yeah.
• 49:06
  Speaker 5: When I look at my brother who had a baby
• 49:08
  Speaker 5: of 50, I'm like, how.
• 49:10
  Speaker 4: If there was somebody in diapers in my house right now,
• 49:14
  Speaker 4: I'd be like, get the fuck. I'm going on the
• 49:17
  Speaker 4: road every week.
• 49:18
  Speaker 6: Yeah.
• 49:19
  Speaker 3: I don't know how.
• 49:20
  Speaker 5: But so the energy was good, but I can tell
• 49:21
  Speaker 5: you if I'm this guy, I know how hard it
• 49:26
  Speaker 5: was for me to be too responsible is not the
• 49:30
  Speaker 5: right word. Cause I think I was always responsible, but I,
• 49:34
  Speaker 5: at 26, your brain is still like, I'd love to
• 49:37
  Speaker 5: see a vagina.
• 49:38
  Speaker 6: Yeah.
• 49:38
  Speaker 2: Yeah.
• 49:39
  Speaker 5: I still have a certain, that male ego is, it's
• 49:45
  Speaker 5: different now. Like right now, the things that were important
• 49:47
  Speaker 5: to me at 26.
• 49:47
  Speaker 4: Aren't important now.
• 49:48
  Speaker 3: Right.
• 49:48
  Speaker 2: Which is great about growing.
• 49:49
  Speaker 4: A hundred percent.
• 49:50
  Speaker 5: I never thought I'd like 50 as much as I do.
• 49:53
  Speaker 2: Yeah.
• 49:53
  Speaker 5: But so like, I don't know, at 26 and you're
• 49:58
  Speaker 5: married to one of the, at the time, one of
• 50:00
  Speaker 5: the most famous people in the world. I don't know
• 50:02
  Speaker 5: that parenting is on the, my top five things that
• 50:06
  Speaker 5: I want to do.
• 50:07
  Speaker 2: I mean, for, to remind people, he got caught cheating. Um,
• 50:12
  Speaker 2: you know, he did. Oh yeah. He had with this
• 50:14
  Speaker 2: girl in San Diego that I actually talked to on
• 50:18
  Speaker 2: the phone. I talked to her on the phone about,
• 50:20
  Speaker 2: about a year ago. Cause a friend of mine knew
• 50:22
  Speaker 2: her and you know, it was in this, this hotel
• 50:26
  Speaker 2: in San Diego, like the hard rock or something. And
• 50:29
  Speaker 2: she shared it. And it got out, I think, through
• 50:32
  Speaker 2: Nick Ritchie's The Dirty, and it became a big thing.
• 50:34
  Speaker 2: And then it was just, then it was out. And
• 50:37
  Speaker 2: I think they kind of had an open thing. I
• 50:38
  Speaker 2: think they had a threesome situation. And she had an
• 50:40
  Speaker 2: alcohol problem, which she talks about in her book. that
• 50:43
  Speaker 2: I think was very difficult for him to deal with.
• 50:46
  Speaker 2: But it was one of those things that, again, it
• 50:48
  Speaker 2: was shocking because everything we saw, just like Kim and Corey,
• 50:51
  Speaker 2: was like, oh my God, they're making it work. She's
• 50:55
  Speaker 2: the top cougar in the world. She was like the
• 50:59
  Speaker 2: original cougar that was making it work. But for him,
• 51:03
  Speaker 2: being a young guy, yeah, he did get married to
• 51:06
  Speaker 2: Mila Kunis, and now they have kids and he like
• 51:09
  Speaker 2: a lot of many and then who knows he could
• 51:11
  Speaker 2: have a baby like Al Pacino and Robert De Niro
• 51:14
  Speaker 2: like in a couple years it's like there's certain things
• 51:18
  Speaker 2: guys just have it better about but.
• 51:20
  Speaker 4: I don't think having a baby at 80 is a benefit.
• 51:23
  Speaker 2: Well, it's not like he's going to be, it's not
• 51:25
  Speaker 2: like Al Pacino is going to be like waking up
• 51:27
  Speaker 2: at 2 in the morning to give it a bottle.
• 51:29
  Speaker 4: She might be waking up at 2 in the morning
• 51:32
  Speaker 4: to give him a bottle.
• 51:32
  Speaker 2: Exactly. Poor Al Pacino.
• 51:35
  Speaker 4: I don't know that I.
• 51:36
  Speaker 5: Want to be naked with somebody at 80. I also,
• 51:39
  Speaker 5: you know what, for sure I don't think ever works
• 51:41
  Speaker 5: is threesomes in a marriage.
• 51:43
  Speaker 4: Never.
• 51:44
  Speaker 2: I've never done it. Are you kidding me? My worst nightmare.
• 51:48
  Speaker 5: Honestly, at this point in my life, my ideal threesome
• 51:50
  Speaker 5: would be Beth and I having sex and somebody else
• 51:52
  Speaker 5: cleaning up the house.
• 51:53
  Speaker 3: Do you know what I mean?
• 51:54
  Speaker 5: Like somebody, can you go pick up the dry cleaning
• 51:56
  Speaker 5: and shit? You're part of the threesome. We're going to
• 52:00
  Speaker 5: have sex, but can you just take care of everything else?
• 52:03
  Speaker 2: Right, yeah.
• 52:03
  Speaker 4: I don't, that never, I tried a threesome once.
• 52:08
  Speaker 2: Before you were married?
• 52:09
  Speaker 4: Before I married.
• 52:10
  Speaker 2: Tell the story. Your son's here.
• 52:12
  Speaker 6: Go.
• 52:12
  Speaker 3: I don't need to hear that story. You want to
• 52:14
  Speaker 3: hear it?
• 52:14
  Speaker 2: No.
• 52:15
  Speaker 6: I do.
• 52:15
  Speaker 2: I want to hear it and so does Drake.
• 52:16
  Speaker 4: Okay. I was never interested in a male, male, female threesome.
• 52:22
  Speaker 2: Nobody is. Unless you're a little bit gay.
• 52:27
  Speaker 4: That's not, that was never my thing.
• 52:29
  Speaker 5: But I dated a girl in college who was a stripper.
• 52:34
  Speaker 3: Yeah.
• 52:35
  Speaker 5: And she would say, one night we were out, she
• 52:38
  Speaker 5: was like, hey, how about I go find a girl
• 52:39
  Speaker 5: for us?
• 52:39
  Speaker 4: And I was like, what do you mean?
• 52:41
  Speaker 5: She's like, we'll go to a bar. You sit at
• 52:43
  Speaker 5: the bar. I'll walk around and find a girl for us.
• 52:46
  Speaker 4: And I was like, how can you find?
• 52:47
  Speaker 2: Was her name Ghislaine Maxwell?
• 52:49
  Speaker 3: Her name was Ghislaine.
• 52:52
  Speaker 4: Tracy actually.
• 52:53
  Speaker 2: Okay.
• 52:53
  Speaker 5: And so Tracy would walk around and bring women up
• 52:57
  Speaker 5: to me at the bar. And the deal was they've
• 53:00
  Speaker 5: already okayed you.
• 53:01
  Speaker 2: Okay.
• 53:02
  Speaker 4: You just, I won't bring somebody up to the bar
• 53:03
  Speaker 4: who doesn't okay you.
• 53:04
  Speaker 2: Yeah.
• 53:05
  Speaker 4: Hasn't already okayed you.
• 53:06
  Speaker 2: Right.
• 53:06
  Speaker 4: You have to okay them.
• 53:07
  Speaker 2: All right.
• 53:08
  Speaker 5: So I would walk, they would walk up and who
• 53:13
  Speaker 5: at the time, right?
• 53:14
  Speaker 4: I'm, I'm 22.
• 53:15
  Speaker 3: Yeah.
• 53:15
  Speaker 2: Oh no, it's 21.
• 53:16
  Speaker 4: Everybody, Every girl she brought up, I was like, yeah,
• 53:20
  Speaker 4: that's fine. Yeah. There's going to be two of you? Yeah,
• 53:23
  Speaker 4: that's fine. It doesn't matter.
• 53:24
  Speaker 5: You could have brought up anybody and I would have
• 53:25
  Speaker 5: said yeah. So we go back to Tracy's and they
• 53:31
  Speaker 5: would always make out first.
• 53:32
  Speaker 3: Okay.
• 53:33
  Speaker 5: And then Tracy would wave me over when she was
• 53:37
  Speaker 5: ready for me to join in.
• 53:39
  Speaker 2: And now do you do them both? You penetrate them both?
• 53:42
  Speaker 5: It depended on what was, like what the other girl,
• 53:46
  Speaker 5: sometimes the other girl was pretty much Straight lesbian.
• 53:49
  Speaker 2: Okay.
• 53:50
  Speaker 4: And so she was not so into me, which was
• 53:53
  Speaker 4: fine also.
• 53:55
  Speaker 2: I just feel like it seems so much like... It
• 53:57
  Speaker 2: was a lot of pressure. It sounds like a step class.
• 54:00
  Speaker 3: Yeah.
• 54:00
  Speaker 2: It sounds like an exercise situation. Like a choreograph... Like
• 54:04
  Speaker 2: too much... I'm thinking.
• 54:06
  Speaker 5: Listen, Heather, you think it takes a lot of athletic
• 54:08
  Speaker 5: ability to light a bomb.
• 54:09
  Speaker 2: That's why I don't do three.
• 54:10
  Speaker 3: Do you know what I mean?
• 54:11
  Speaker 2: I don't smoke pot.
• 54:11
  Speaker 3: Don't do three. Yeah.
• 54:13
  Speaker 4: There's a lot.
• 54:14
  Speaker 2: Keep it simple.
• 54:15
  Speaker 4: There's a lot.
• 54:16
  Speaker 3: There's a lot happening.
• 54:17
  Speaker 5: And so I actually, after the first time, I was- Now.
• 54:23
  Speaker 2: Did everyone sleep over, all three in a bed? Oh, no,
• 54:26
  Speaker 2: I left. Because I hate being in the middle. I
• 54:27
  Speaker 2: needed my leg off a side of something.
• 54:29
  Speaker 4: No, I left. I left. I was not. That was
• 54:31
  Speaker 4: not for me.
• 54:32
  Speaker 2: Okay.
• 54:32
  Speaker 5: But I remember calling- Tracy the next day and I
• 54:35
  Speaker 5: was like so I um.
• 54:38
  Speaker 4: How how'd I how'd I do and she was like
• 54:41
  Speaker 4: yeah it was great I was like I don't I
• 54:44
  Speaker 4: don't like that she was like well.
• 54:45
  Speaker 5: Didn't you have a good time I go yeah I
• 54:46
  Speaker 5: had a good time but all I've been thinking about
• 54:48
  Speaker 5: the whole night is like how'd I do she was
• 54:53
  Speaker 5: like I don't know how to answer that I'm like
• 54:54
  Speaker 5: yes yes you do I think she did yeah yeah
• 54:57
  Speaker 5: I was like yes yes you do she said I
• 54:59
  Speaker 5: go she goes I'm gonna find somebody else I go
• 55:01
  Speaker 5: why she was that The first time, she was like,
• 55:03
  Speaker 5: that girl did not.
• 55:04
  Speaker 2: Have a good time. Again, I mean, it's bad enough
• 55:07
  Speaker 2: to hiring people.
• 55:09
  Speaker 3: Yeah.
• 55:09
  Speaker 2: That's why I use ZipRecruiter. Because, no.
• 55:14
  Speaker 4: I will say one girl.
• 55:15
  Speaker 3: I'm going to find somebody else.
• 55:16
  Speaker 2: It didn't work out.
• 55:16
  Speaker 5: One girl she brought back was really into the idea
• 55:22
  Speaker 5: of putting a strap-on on.
• 55:24
  Speaker 4: And I was like, that is not my.
• 55:26
  Speaker 2: And then do you in the booty?
• 55:27
  Speaker 6: Yeah.
• 55:28
  Speaker 4: She was like, you do her, I'll do you. I'm like,
• 55:30
  Speaker 4: this sounds terrible.
• 55:32
  Speaker 2: Please say you didn't do this. And even if you did, say.
• 55:36
  Speaker 4: You didn't do this.
• 55:37
  Speaker 5: I was like, this sounds like, this does not sound like,
• 55:40
  Speaker 5: she said Tracy said you might be into it.
• 55:41
  Speaker 4: I was like, she was wrong. This is not a
• 55:44
  Speaker 4: situation that I'm into. Yeah, being, getting that.
• 55:48
  Speaker 2: No.
• 55:48
  Speaker 4: That is not my thing.
• 55:49
  Speaker 2: All right, we are going to bring in The baby here, Jacob.
• 55:52
  Speaker 2: And I have some fun ones for you.
• 55:54
  Speaker 4: He's not even a baby anymore.
• 55:56
  Speaker 2: Okay, I've got Josh Wolfe here. Now we are joined
• 55:59
  Speaker 2: by your son, your co-host, your opener on the road,
• 56:02
  Speaker 2: and your sperm that turned into something.
• 56:06
  Speaker 3: There you go. That's a great way to put it. Yes, yes.
• 56:09
  Speaker 2: Hello.
• 56:09
  Speaker 3: Hello. How are you?
• 56:11
  Speaker 2: I'm good, Jacob. You know what we always say? There
• 56:13
  Speaker 2: was this time where McKenzie, my stepdaughter, she was mad
• 56:17
  Speaker 2: at her father. And, you know, I was trying to
• 56:20
  Speaker 2: settle this argument. And she goes, great choice in men, Mom.
• 56:24
  Speaker 3: And I go, what?
• 56:26
  Speaker 2: You were here before me. And I go, so we
• 56:29
  Speaker 2: constantly joke, like, any time the boys are annoyed with Peter,
• 56:33
  Speaker 2: my husband, I'll be like, great choice in sperm. Great choice.
• 56:37
  Speaker 2: It's like it's not me. Like, it's just like, good job.
• 56:40
  Speaker 3: Yeah.
• 56:40
  Speaker 4: Good job picking the winner.
• 56:41
  Speaker 2: You came from him first, okay? I had no choice
• 56:44
  Speaker 2: in the.
• 56:45
  Speaker 3: Matter, okay?
• 56:46
  Speaker 4: Yeah, you didn't have a choice.
• 56:47
  Speaker 3: No, but I won the race.
• 56:48
  Speaker 4: You did win the race.
• 56:50
  Speaker 3: I was born a winner. You know what I'm saying?
• 56:51
  Speaker 3: That's all I got to say to that.
• 56:53
  Speaker 2: That's right. Um, okay. So we were just talking about,
• 56:56
  Speaker 2: so Chloe and Tristan with their tumultuous relationship, they have
• 57:00
  Speaker 2: their daughter true. They have their son Tatum born by
• 57:03
  Speaker 2: surrogacy while, because she couldn't carry the baby, the second one. And, um,
• 57:08
  Speaker 2: The baby now, they finally announced the name after your Tatum.
• 57:11
  Speaker 2: And I guess originally, according to TMZ, she had Kardashian
• 57:16
  Speaker 2: as his last name because they were not getting along
• 57:19
  Speaker 2: because he impregnated somebody else during the time that they
• 57:22
  Speaker 2: were supposedly together. So he has a child from before Khloe.
• 57:28
  Speaker 2: Then he has Trues with Khloe. Then he got someone
• 57:31
  Speaker 2: pregnant and there's another boy that that woman carried. Of course,
• 57:35
  Speaker 2: he cheated on Khloe. Chloe with Kylie's best friend Jordan
• 57:40
  Speaker 2: and there were other stories of cheating anyway so she
• 57:44
  Speaker 2: goes and has another baby with him via surrogate and
• 57:47
  Speaker 2: she'd sometimes say we weren't together we are together but
• 57:49
  Speaker 2: I want Tate I want true to have a full
• 57:51
  Speaker 2: sibling whatever so now she allegedly put Kardashian on the
• 57:57
  Speaker 2: last name of birth but now she has changed it
• 58:01
  Speaker 2: back to Thompson the name of his father.
• 58:04
  Speaker 3: I have one thing to say about this. He must
• 58:06
  Speaker 3: have some Pete Davidson dick because she can never stray away.
• 58:10
  Speaker 3: Anything that happens in this relationship, she always ends up
• 58:14
  Speaker 3: coming back.
• 58:15
  Speaker 4: Is that a term, Pete Davidson dick?
• 58:17
  Speaker 3: I mean, look at Pete Davidson. He is not a
• 58:19
  Speaker 3: great looking dude, but he pulls some of the greatest
• 58:21
  Speaker 3: looking women in the world.
• 58:23
  Speaker 2: The only thing that makes sense is that- Even Kim said,
• 58:25
  Speaker 2: I wanted part of that big energy dick because I
• 58:28
  Speaker 2: think it's like everybody else tried. It's like getting a
• 58:30
  Speaker 2: great decorator. Like, oh my God, look how great her
• 58:34
  Speaker 2: house looks.
• 58:34
  Speaker 4: I should try that decorator.
• 58:36
  Speaker 5: If one supermodel dates a dude, then the rest of
• 58:39
  Speaker 5: the supermodels are like, well, I gotta try that ice cream.
• 58:42
  Speaker 3: Yeah, he's automatically more attractive. It's like they want something
• 58:45
  Speaker 3: that they can't have, right? So then it's more appealing
• 58:47
  Speaker 3: to them that that someone who shouldn't have that person does.
• 58:51
  Speaker 3: So they're like, oh, I wonder what I'm missing out on.
• 58:53
  Speaker 2: And that, like. I do, not with everybody, but I
• 58:55
  Speaker 2: think with certain people, they're like, okay, like, all these
• 58:59
  Speaker 2: cool girls that are beautiful gave him the stamp of
• 59:02
  Speaker 2: approval by dating him.
• 59:03
  Speaker 4: Right.
• 59:05
  Speaker 2: So, sure, why not? Like, why not try it? And
• 59:08
  Speaker 2: I think, I mean, I, I have heard from very
• 59:11
  Speaker 2: good sources he does have an enormous dick.
• 59:14
  Speaker 3: It's the only thing that makes sense, by the way. Like,
• 59:16
  Speaker 3: there's no way that a dude.
• 59:17
  Speaker 2: Who looks like... And like a good one, not like
• 59:19
  Speaker 2: a scary one. Not like so big that it's terrifying.
• 59:22
  Speaker 3: Right, right, right.
• 59:23
  Speaker 2: Just big enough that you're like, that's memorable.
• 59:25
  Speaker 6: Yeah.
• 59:26
  Speaker 2: Yeah.
• 59:29
  Speaker 7: Yeah.
• 59:30
  Speaker 4: I've never heard of that term, scary dick, before.
• 59:34
  Speaker 2: Well, there's some dick that's just too big, and girls
• 59:37
  Speaker 2: don't know what to do with it, and they're like,
• 59:39
  Speaker 2: this just wasn't even fun, and I don't even want
• 59:42
  Speaker 2: to try.
• 59:42
  Speaker 4: Like, no.
• 59:43
  Speaker 3: Seems like more of a painful than a pleasurable experience.
• 59:45
  Speaker 2: And there's men that have said it's been a hindrance
• 59:48
  Speaker 2: in their life because it's too big.
• 59:50
  Speaker 5: There's a article about that dude who had the biggest
• 59:54
  Speaker 5: dong in the world, and he was like.
• 59:57
  Speaker 4: It's not fun.
• 59:58
  Speaker 3: He's walking around with a third leg. Shit, that's not comfortable.
• 1:00:01
  Speaker 4: He was like, there's a lot of pants I can't wear.
• 1:00:03
  Speaker 4: I never thought of fashion-wise.
• 1:00:04
  Speaker 3: He probably can't even wear shorts. Because it probably just
• 1:00:07
  Speaker 3: goes boop, right out the bottom.
• 1:00:08
  Speaker 4: Do you remember jams?
• 1:00:10
  Speaker 2: No.
• 1:00:11
  Speaker 4: Those long... Peter, remember jams? Those long floral shorts? Okay,
• 1:00:17
  Speaker 4: maybe that was just Northeast. Let me ask you something.
• 1:00:19
  Speaker 2: Can you cut out the jams part?
• 1:00:20
  Speaker 4: Let me ask you something about.
• 1:00:26
  Speaker 3: He went for a reference and he was like, I
• 1:00:27
  Speaker 3: guess I'm too old for that one too.
• 1:00:28
  Speaker 7: Shit.
• 1:00:28
  Speaker 4: Let me ask you something.
• 1:00:29
  Speaker 3: Yeah.
• 1:00:31
  Speaker 5: Because honestly, I don't know if I would have recognized
• 1:00:34
  Speaker 5: her if that hadn't been up there.
• 1:00:37
  Speaker 4: I think out of all the, she looks the most different, right?
• 1:00:41
  Speaker 3: Yeah.
• 1:00:41
  Speaker 4: Out of the three sisters?
• 1:00:43
  Speaker 2: I mean, yeah, from the beginning. But I mean, granted,
• 1:00:45
  Speaker 2: it's been like 16 years. And yes, she has lost weight.
• 1:00:48
  Speaker 2: She's gone blonde and everything. But, I mean, you know, yeah,
• 1:00:52
  Speaker 2: everybody gets stuff done. I mean, that's just life.
• 1:00:54
  Speaker 4: I think she looks great. No, I just think she
• 1:00:55
  Speaker 4: looks great.
• 1:00:56
  Speaker 3: She looks great. But I will say, like, I definitely
• 1:00:58
  Speaker 3: also have noticed, like, in the last couple years, her
• 1:01:01
  Speaker 3: whole face has almost changed. And it may be the
• 1:01:03
  Speaker 3: Photoshop on the photos and certain stuff like that. Can
• 1:01:05
  Speaker 3: you sculpt your chin?
• 1:01:07
  Speaker 2: Yes, you can do everything.
• 1:01:08
  Speaker 3: You can do anything.
• 1:01:09
  Speaker 4: What do they do, shave bone?
• 1:01:10
  Speaker 2: Well, you can.
• 1:01:10
  Speaker 3: No, they take out.
• 1:01:12
  Speaker 2: You can do that. I mean, well, if you're getting, like,
• 1:01:14
  Speaker 2: a feminized surgery, like if you were. transitioning you can
• 1:01:17
  Speaker 2: do it down but you can also fill it up
• 1:01:19
  Speaker 2: and give yourself more of like a jaw line and
• 1:01:22
  Speaker 2: you can obviously change your nose your cheeks or you
• 1:01:25
  Speaker 2: can lift your.
• 1:01:25
  Speaker 5: Brows lips if there was a part of you yes
• 1:01:28
  Speaker 5: have you ever thought of this if there was a
• 1:01:29
  Speaker 5: part of you what would you.
• 1:01:32
  Speaker 2: Change I don't have a great nose and I wish
• 1:01:35
  Speaker 2: I would have gotten it done like like a long
• 1:01:37
  Speaker 2: time ago now I feel like it's not something I
• 1:01:39
  Speaker 2: would want to do right but like it like I
• 1:01:42
  Speaker 2: have a little bump and I have to shade it
• 1:01:44
  Speaker 2: it's not terrible but you.
• 1:01:45
  Speaker 4: Know I don't know I would do, my ears are
• 1:01:49
  Speaker 4: going to be huge.
• 1:01:49
  Speaker 3: I knew you were going to say that. I literally
• 1:01:52
  Speaker 3: looked at you.
• 1:01:53
  Speaker 4: My ears, they're flat.
• 1:01:55
  Speaker 3: Do the thing with your ear.
• 1:01:56
  Speaker 4: Yeah, there's no cartilage.
• 1:01:58
  Speaker 2: Okay.
• 1:01:58
  Speaker 4: So they're going to be huge old man ears.
• 1:02:02
  Speaker 2: Also, I'd like to cut this. Like, this is like
• 1:02:06
  Speaker 2: turning off everybody. We want people to go see your show.
• 1:02:08
  Speaker 3: Oh, sorry, sorry, sorry. Well, I hope they're not going
• 1:02:10
  Speaker 3: to the show to stare at his ears.
• 1:02:11
  Speaker 2: You know what? Like, back in the Chelsea Lately days,
• 1:02:13
  Speaker 2: you know, she'd always go, like, say camel toe to me,
• 1:02:17
  Speaker 2: which I did not have a camel toe. No. But
• 1:02:20
  Speaker 2: I would do, like, bits where, like, I made a
• 1:02:22
  Speaker 2: camel toe. Like, there was that lady that did that prancer,
• 1:02:24
  Speaker 2: that prancer video. I don't even know what that was.
• 1:02:26
  Speaker 2: It was a weird YouTube video with a prancer.
• 1:02:28
  Speaker 3: I love that video.
• 1:02:28
  Speaker 2: And we literally built a camel toe. Like, I had
• 1:02:31
  Speaker 2: to dance like that. And then also she'd say, like,
• 1:02:33
  Speaker 2: long boobs because it was sketched. And I'd get off
• 1:02:35
  Speaker 2: stage and someone would be like, you don't have long
• 1:02:37
  Speaker 2: boobs or a camel toe. I'm like, well, I'm glad
• 1:02:40
  Speaker 2: that's what you're fixated on.
• 1:02:41
  Speaker 4: For an hour and a half.
• 1:02:42
  Speaker 3: Yeah.
• 1:02:44
  Speaker 2: Anyway, you were saying, can someone just change it? I
• 1:02:48
  Speaker 2: think when you are, it can be a court situation.
• 1:02:52
  Speaker 2: If you are saying that someone is the father and
• 1:02:55
  Speaker 2: you're getting child support for them and you can fight
• 1:02:59
  Speaker 2: for everything. If the man's name is not on it,
• 1:03:02
  Speaker 2: he can fight and say, I at least want it
• 1:03:03
  Speaker 2: to be a middle or we need to settle on
• 1:03:05
  Speaker 2: a hyphen or whatever. He can insist on having his
• 1:03:09
  Speaker 2: name on there if he is. Pain and being the father.
• 1:03:13
  Speaker 4: How was it not on there to begin with? He
• 1:03:15
  Speaker 4: must not have been at the birth.
• 1:03:17
  Speaker 2: I think at this point he wasn't going to fight anything,
• 1:03:19
  Speaker 2: you know, and it was probably like, OK, but then
• 1:03:21
  Speaker 2: maybe they agreed. But it's interesting because on the new
• 1:03:24
  Speaker 2: Hulu show, she goes, I hope Rob Kardashian, her brother,
• 1:03:27
  Speaker 2: has a boy because the name will end with him.
• 1:03:30
  Speaker 2: And he only has a daughter with Blac Chyna. But meanwhile,
• 1:03:33
  Speaker 2: she could have. And I remember thinking, why did she
• 1:03:35
  Speaker 2: just make her son Kardashian?
• 1:03:37
  Speaker 3: Yeah.
• 1:03:37
  Speaker 2: Why doesn't she just keep her son Kardashian? What does
• 1:03:40
  Speaker 2: it matter?
• 1:03:41
  Speaker 3: On a side note, isn't it crazy that Rob Kardashian
• 1:03:43
  Speaker 3: has a kid with Blac Chyna? It is one of
• 1:03:46
  Speaker 3: the greatest moments. To me, just hearing that out loud
• 1:03:49
  Speaker 3: every time I hear it, I'm like, how come? Look
• 1:03:52
  Speaker 3: at Rob and look at Blac Chyna. That's all I
• 1:03:54
  Speaker 3: have to say.
• 1:03:54
  Speaker 4: Do you think that's the weirdest couple ever?
• 1:03:57
  Speaker 3: No, just for me, it just stands out. Blac Chyna
• 1:03:59
  Speaker 3: doesn't look like she's fucking Rob Kardashian very often.
• 1:04:02
  Speaker 2: It was the ultimate, ultimate guy. She needed to get
• 1:04:06
  Speaker 2: them back because Tyga was her boyfriend and the father
• 1:04:11
  Speaker 2: of her son, King, and King Cairo. And then they
• 1:04:15
  Speaker 2: were all friends. In fact, I think that they may
• 1:04:18
  Speaker 2: have attended Kim and Kanye's wedding. And then allegedly, you know,
• 1:04:23
  Speaker 2: the minute Kylie turned 18, she started to date Tyga.
• 1:04:28
  Speaker 2: And so then, you know, Blac Chyna is not being
• 1:04:31
  Speaker 2: invited to any stuff anymore. And so one night... Chloe
• 1:04:35
  Speaker 2: is gone. Rob lives at her house in like the Oaks,
• 1:04:38
  Speaker 2: which is a gated community. Somehow they start DMing each
• 1:04:41
  Speaker 2: other and Black Chyna gets behind those gates and like
• 1:04:45
  Speaker 2: fucking the Grinch who stole Christmas, climbs up the ladder,
• 1:04:48
  Speaker 2: and Khloe comes home and is like, what's Blac Chyna
• 1:04:50
  Speaker 2: doing there? Well, too late now.
• 1:04:52
  Speaker 3: She was pregnant.
• 1:04:54
  Speaker 2: And her daughter's a Kardashian.
• 1:04:58
  Speaker 3: Dream Kardashian. I'm never going to let you guys forget
• 1:05:01
  Speaker 3: my name, because you guys are going to be stuck
• 1:05:02
  Speaker 3: with me for the rest of your life.
• 1:05:04
  Speaker 2: But now they're okay.
• 1:05:05
  Speaker 4: Who, Rob and Blac Chyna?
• 1:05:07
  Speaker 2: Yeah, and like, well, the family has always been great
• 1:05:09
  Speaker 2: to Dream, obviously, the daughter, and then They all go
• 1:05:12
  Speaker 2: to the same Sierra Canyon school. And so Dream and
• 1:05:16
  Speaker 2: True and her daughter and Kylie's daughter and maybe one
• 1:05:20
  Speaker 2: of Kim's.
• 1:05:21
  Speaker 4: Dream, True, and Stormi?
• 1:05:23
  Speaker 3: Yeah.
• 1:05:23
  Speaker 2: Yeah, they all graduated from the little kindergarten there and
• 1:05:25
  Speaker 2: they were all there together. What?
• 1:05:27
  Speaker 4: Those names, that name of that group.
• 1:05:28
  Speaker 3: Yeah, and then like North, and you just look at
• 1:05:31
  Speaker 3: just the names of those kids.
• 1:05:32
  Speaker 4: Dream, True, Stormy, North.
• 1:05:33
  Speaker 7: Yeah.
• 1:05:34
  Speaker 3: Chicago? Chicago and Psalm.
• 1:05:37
  Speaker 4: Yeah. Chicago is the name of the child?
• 1:05:39
  Speaker 6: Yes.
• 1:05:39
  Speaker 2: Yeah, and then Psalm, like Psalm 57. We have a
• 1:05:42
  Speaker 2: book from Psalm. Yeah.
• 1:05:43
  Speaker 3: Wow.
• 1:05:44
  Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah.
• 1:05:46
  Speaker 4: That was Christmas stocking.
• 1:05:48
  Speaker 2: Oh, and then, you know, Kanye is now making his
• 1:05:53
  Speaker 2: wife wear those weird outfits and everything.
• 1:05:55
  Speaker 3: How about him with the shoulder pads? He goes out
• 1:05:56
  Speaker 3: in a bodysuit.
• 1:05:57
  Speaker 2: Yeah, he's wearing shoulder pads, lululemons, and socks.
• 1:06:00
  Speaker 3: I don't even think they're socks. I don't think he's
• 1:06:01
  Speaker 3: wearing anything.
• 1:06:02
  Speaker 2: They're sock shoes.
• 1:06:03
  Speaker 3: And why does she look like one of those socks shoes? Oh,
• 1:06:07
  Speaker 3: I saw those. Yeah, but then why does she look
• 1:06:09
  Speaker 3: like one of those drug addicts who goes to rob
• 1:06:11
  Speaker 3: a bank and just has a pantyhose over her head?
• 1:06:13
  Speaker 2: Yeah, he put a pantyhose over her head.
• 1:06:15
  Speaker 3: Why does she look like a non-drug bank robber? What's
• 1:06:18
  Speaker 3: the problem?
• 1:06:18
  Speaker 2: Again, I want to say, these people that marry someone,
• 1:06:21
  Speaker 2: you think, won't this be great? I'm marrying the greatest musician, Kanye.
• 1:06:24
  Speaker 2: He's so famous. I'm going to be in this fabulous
• 1:06:26
  Speaker 2: house in Hidden Hills and everything. And a lot like
• 1:06:29
  Speaker 2: Sam who married Britney Spears. You know what? Turns out
• 1:06:32
  Speaker 2: not that fun. Not that fun.
• 1:06:34
  Speaker 3: Not worth it.
• 1:06:36
  Speaker 2: You're not going to interesting dinners. You're not meeting cool people.
• 1:06:40
  Speaker 2: You are putting a net over your head and acting
• 1:06:43
  Speaker 2: like you want to wear a condom dress. It's very sad.
• 1:06:47
  Speaker 3: I'm not going to lie. I saw this the other day.
• 1:06:49
  Speaker 3: Kanye saw Kim get Pete Davidson and he had to
• 1:06:53
  Speaker 3: go get one of his own. If you look at
• 1:06:55
  Speaker 3: her right next to Pete Davidson with blonde hair, it's eerie.
• 1:06:58
  Speaker 2: That one photo was photoshopped. It's like a similar comparison.
• 1:07:02
  Speaker 2: She looks like if Kim and Pete had had a
• 1:07:07
  Speaker 2: daughter and she was 25. That's what she looks like.
• 1:07:09
  Speaker 2: She does look like both of them.
• 1:07:10
  Speaker 4: Yeah, it is a little weird. It's strange.
• 1:07:11
  Speaker 2: I need to talk to you about something very serious
• 1:07:13
  Speaker 2: that happened in your town of Las Vegas.
• 1:07:14
  Speaker 3: Yes.
• 1:07:15
  Speaker 2: So you guys live in Las Vegas, and you have
• 1:07:18
  Speaker 2: your residency there at the Jimmy Kimmel every Monday, right?
• 1:07:23
  Speaker 3: Every Monday night.
• 1:07:23
  Speaker 4: Yeah, we did it last night.
• 1:07:24
  Speaker 2: And so I have— I was never believed in aliens
• 1:07:29
  Speaker 2: or anything, but there is too much happening right now.
• 1:07:32
  Speaker 4: And this is crazy.
• 1:07:33
  Speaker 2: So if you know the story, tell the story.
• 1:07:35
  Speaker 3: OK, so there's a crazy 911 phone call and it's like, hey,
• 1:07:39
  Speaker 3: can you send somebody out here?
• 1:07:40
  Speaker 4: And they're like, yeah, what's wrong?
• 1:07:41
  Speaker 3: He goes, something crashed in my backyard. And right now
• 1:07:44
  Speaker 3: I'm currently staring at what looks like two eight to
• 1:07:47
  Speaker 3: 10 foot gray figures with ginormous eyes in my backyard.
• 1:07:52
  Speaker 3: And they are staring at me. and won't take their
• 1:07:54
  Speaker 3: eyes off of me. And it's just this back and forth,
• 1:07:56
  Speaker 3: and they go, okay, I'm gonna send a cop out.
• 1:07:58
  Speaker 3: But it takes an hour for the cop to get there.
• 1:07:59
  Speaker 3: Typical police, right? It takes forever. And they show up,
• 1:08:03
  Speaker 3: and whatever is there is gone. And then it flashes
• 1:08:06
  Speaker 3: to this clip, and it's a body cam footage of
• 1:08:08
  Speaker 3: a cop watching something fall out of the sky. And
• 1:08:12
  Speaker 3: it's like this great green-blue beam of light, like it's something.
• 1:08:16
  Speaker 3: And then, five minutes later, that 911 phone call happens.
• 1:08:19
  Speaker 2: And the cop on... the video or the camera, whatever
• 1:08:23
  Speaker 2: they got, says, I'm not going to lie, my partner
• 1:08:26
  Speaker 2: just said he saw something fall out of the sky. Yeah. Okay,
• 1:08:31
  Speaker 2: so now.
• 1:08:31
  Speaker 4: Do you want it to be true?
• 1:08:33
  Speaker 3: Yes.
• 1:08:33
  Speaker 4: No, I don't. You don't.
• 1:08:35
  Speaker 2: No, I'm terrified.
• 1:08:35
  Speaker 6: You do.
• 1:08:36
  Speaker 3: I've seen a UFO.
• 1:08:37
  Speaker 4: What do you mean you've seen the UFO?
• 1:08:39
  Speaker 3: Hold on, real quick, real quick. This was a younger story. Oh, wait.
• 1:08:42
  Speaker 3: I told you this. I told you this. We were
• 1:08:44
  Speaker 3: coming home from a, I think, flag football practice, and
• 1:08:46
  Speaker 3: I was with a buddy of mine in the car.
• 1:08:47
  Speaker 3: You weren't there. It was just my mom driving us home.
• 1:08:49
  Speaker 2: And this was the valley?
• 1:08:50
  Speaker 3: Yeah, it was like Riverside and Fulton. It was like
• 1:08:53
  Speaker 3: real close. And we're driving, and we get into this neighborhood,
• 1:08:57
  Speaker 3: and I look up in the sky, and there is
• 1:08:59
  Speaker 3: something in the sky. with four different colored lights all
• 1:09:02
  Speaker 3: of them are turning it's got layers to it and
• 1:09:04
  Speaker 3: I was like what is that and me my friend
• 1:09:07
  Speaker 3: Jack are looking at it we drive a little further
• 1:09:09
  Speaker 3: past another stop sign it goes behind a tree we
• 1:09:12
  Speaker 3: come past that tree it's gone and to this day
• 1:09:15
  Speaker 3: I Me and Jack are still the only two who
• 1:09:17
  Speaker 3: have seen whatever that was, but no one ever believes me.
• 1:09:20
  Speaker 2: You remember that the same way I remember seeing that.
• 1:09:22
  Speaker 4: Penis, I think.
• 1:09:24
  Speaker 3: Same age, by the way, nine, I think, actually. Memories.
• 1:09:30
  Speaker 2: I was flashed at nine years old at St.
• 1:09:32
  Speaker 3: Mel's School. Yes.
• 1:09:34
  Speaker 2: I know what you mean.
• 1:09:35
  Speaker 3: Unidentified flying objects found similar, I guess. So I want
• 1:09:39
  Speaker 3: this to be real so bad. Just because, like, also
• 1:09:41
  Speaker 3: here's the thing. If you think out of all the
• 1:09:43
  Speaker 3: galaxies and how small we are in this cosmos that
• 1:09:45
  Speaker 3: there's not other beings in this universe and whatnot, like...
• 1:09:50
  Speaker 3: It's crazy to say.
• 1:09:51
  Speaker 2: Okay, the only other explanation for this, okay, now here's
• 1:09:54
  Speaker 2: some criticism of it. Okay. Where is his video?
• 1:09:58
  Speaker 3: See, I saw the person in the backyard.
• 1:09:59
  Speaker 2: Well, then someone said, why haven't we, this was Hollywood Unlocked.
• 1:10:03
  Speaker 2: This was five days ago or something. I've heard very
• 1:10:06
  Speaker 2: little about it. where is his phone? You don't think
• 1:10:10
  Speaker 2: the government got involved and took his, there's no way
• 1:10:13
  Speaker 2: he didn't take a photo. And if he did, why
• 1:10:15
  Speaker 2: isn't he talking? And he's like, you know, if he
• 1:10:18
  Speaker 2: sounds like he's just, you know, living a middle-class life.
• 1:10:21
  Speaker 2: So did the government be like, do not talk anymore
• 1:10:24
  Speaker 2: about this. Here's a little money. Give us your phone.
• 1:10:27
  Speaker 2: Shut up. Don't do interviews. Why is this guy not
• 1:10:30
  Speaker 2: doing interviews?
• 1:10:30
  Speaker 5: If he's on the phone saying, this is what I'm seeing,
• 1:10:34
  Speaker 5: I'm sure he videotaped it.
• 1:10:35
  Speaker 3: At one point, you wouldn't have filmed it? He was with, like,
• 1:10:37
  Speaker 3: four other people. That's what I'm saying. I said the
• 1:10:39
  Speaker 3: same thing.
• 1:10:39
  Speaker 2: There is video of it. I was like, yo, where's.
• 1:10:41
  Speaker 3: The witness video? Where's his video? Where are the other
• 1:10:44
  Speaker 3: four people's phones? I was thinking the same exact thing.
• 1:10:46
  Speaker 4: Why don't you want it to be true?
• 1:10:48
  Speaker 2: Because I'm scared. First of all, I never want to
• 1:10:52
  Speaker 2: go on a spaceship. I don't want to go to Mars.
• 1:10:55
  Speaker 2: I don't.
• 1:10:56
  Speaker 3: Listen. I'm with you on that, though. The main thing is.
• 1:10:58
  Speaker 4: You don't?
• 1:10:59
  Speaker 3: Yo, you want to go through all that training to
• 1:11:02
  Speaker 3: sit on a rocket?
• 1:11:03
  Speaker 4: You think the aliens are training you?
• 1:11:04
  Speaker 2: No, no.
• 1:11:05
  Speaker 3: She said go on a spaceship.
• 1:11:07
  Speaker 2: Also, I have two straight white males. Do you know
• 1:11:09
  Speaker 2: how hard it was to get one in college?
• 1:11:12
  Speaker 7: Yeah.
• 1:11:12
  Speaker 2: Now they're going to have to compete with aliens that
• 1:11:14
  Speaker 2: are clearly going to be smarter than us. There's going
• 1:11:16
  Speaker 2: to be, we've got to have 15% aliens.
• 1:11:19
  Speaker 4: Yeah.
• 1:11:20
  Speaker 2: You know?
• 1:11:20
  Speaker 4: And if they're 80 tall, he's only 6'5. Yeah, so that's.
• 1:11:22
  Speaker 2: Why I don't want it. Sorry. I don't need to
• 1:11:28
  Speaker 2: have that shoved in my face about how much smarter
• 1:11:30
  Speaker 2: the aliens are, what they're learning at their schools.
• 1:11:34
  Speaker 4: I want to go on a spaceship. I want to
• 1:11:37
  Speaker 4: go on an alien spaceship, and I want to take
• 1:11:39
  Speaker 4: an alien ride.
• 1:11:40
  Speaker 6: 100%.
• 1:11:40
  Speaker 2: You should go and be on that show if it's
• 1:11:43
  Speaker 2: a hit. You know, Natasha's on it.
• 1:11:45
  Speaker 3: What?
• 1:11:45
  Speaker 2: I'm not watching it.
• 1:11:46
  Speaker 4: The Mars show?
• 1:11:47
  Speaker 2: Yeah, Stars on Mars. They went to Australia. Obviously, they
• 1:11:49
  Speaker 2: didn't go to Mars. They made it like a Mars
• 1:11:51
  Speaker 2: type of thing. It's like a competition, like a big
• 1:11:53
  Speaker 2: brother with competition. But you'd probably have a lot of
• 1:11:56
  Speaker 2: fun with that. Let's put it out there.
• 1:11:57
  Speaker 3: I would do it, too.
• 1:11:59
  Speaker 2: If I don't actually have to go to Mars, I
• 1:12:00
  Speaker 2: love Australia. I would totally be down. And then we'd
• 1:12:03
  Speaker 2: just go and have a week of shows in Sydney after. Amazing.
• 1:12:06
  Speaker 2: I would probably be kicked out first.
• 1:12:08
  Speaker 3: How come you haven't done Dancing with the Stars yet?
• 1:12:09
  Speaker 3: How come you haven't done Dancing with the Stars yet?
• 1:12:12
  Speaker 2: How do I have it? What do you think? Nobody's
• 1:12:15
  Speaker 2: asked me.
• 1:12:16
  Speaker 4: Are you kidding? Wait a second.
• 1:12:18
  Speaker 2: Oh, I turned it down.
• 1:12:20
  Speaker 3: Have you not reached out to them?
• 1:12:21
  Speaker 2: I was like, I'm going to stick with Juicy Scoop.
• 1:12:23
  Speaker 4: Have you not reached out to them?
• 1:12:25
  Speaker 2: Who knows? You have to.
• 1:12:28
  Speaker 5: You should get those little legs out there kicking around.
• 1:12:31
  Speaker 2: Are you kidding me? Okay, you know, even Jeff Bezos
• 1:12:36
  Speaker 2: has to be an Instagram husband. Jeff Bezos, Lauren Sanchez.
• 1:12:42
  Speaker 2: Greatest story ever. I've been DMing this girl. This is amazing.
• 1:12:45
  Speaker 2: I'm like, girl, let's get cocktails.
• 1:12:47
  Speaker 4: This particular picture is amazing.
• 1:12:51
  Speaker 2: Yeah.
• 1:12:51
  Speaker 4: Because she's like. How much younger is she than him?
• 1:12:54
  Speaker 2: She's 53 and he's like 57. Oh, she looks great.
• 1:12:57
  Speaker 3: That's exactly what I was going to say.
• 1:12:58
  Speaker 2: I mean, their relationship started while they were both still married,
• 1:13:01
  Speaker 2: which isn't great. But girls go for it.
• 1:13:07
  Speaker 3: No, she might bag the richest dude on earth.
• 1:13:08
  Speaker 2: I know, you might. At 53, I mean, she's hot.
• 1:13:11
  Speaker 2: She's got a good body. She gave him a blow-up.
• 1:13:13
  Speaker 2: He all of a sudden was taking the HG, whatever
• 1:13:16
  Speaker 2: you call it.
• 1:13:16
  Speaker 3: Do his arms look HGH?
• 1:13:17
  Speaker 2: Yeah, of course you do.
• 1:13:18
  Speaker 4: His arms look amazing. He looks massive.
• 1:13:22
  Speaker 3: HGH.
• 1:13:22
  Speaker 2: Okay, I want to talk about this. Pink's daughter, Willow,
• 1:13:25
  Speaker 2: joins her on stage to perform. Of course, you say it, Austin.
• 1:13:28
  Speaker 2: It's awesome, you little nepotism comic.
• 1:13:30
  Speaker 3: You little nepo baby. I love the fact that at 12,
• 1:13:34
  Speaker 3: she has the confidence to get on stage with her mom,
• 1:13:36
  Speaker 3: because she's probably in front of a ridiculous amount of people.
• 1:13:38
  Speaker 2: Prior to this, I'm with my friend, and we're hanging out,
• 1:13:43
  Speaker 2: and she sees that Beyonce's daughter is dancing, not singing,
• 1:13:46
  Speaker 2: but dancing on stage. And then she was like, no
• 1:13:50
  Speaker 2: one wants to see that. No one wants to pay
• 1:13:52
  Speaker 2: all this money to see your daughter dance. I go,
• 1:13:54
  Speaker 2: who cares? It's a girl. Probably doing one dance. She
• 1:13:56
  Speaker 2: might not want to do it next summer. Why not?
• 1:13:59
  Speaker 2: Come on stage. Whatever. J-Lo had her daughter sing. And
• 1:14:03
  Speaker 2: she's getting so angry about it. I'm like, do I
• 1:14:05
  Speaker 2: need to remind you that your sons work for your
• 1:14:08
  Speaker 2: husband's company?
• 1:14:09
  Speaker 6: Yeah.
• 1:14:09
  Speaker 2: And they deserve it. And they're great kids. But like,
• 1:14:14
  Speaker 2: so what?
• 1:14:15
  Speaker 4: For me, the decision to bring him on the road
• 1:14:18
  Speaker 4: was a no-brainer. You know what it's like on the road.
• 1:14:20
  Speaker 2: Yeah.
• 1:14:22
  Speaker 5: And sometimes it's lonely. And to be able to hang
• 1:14:25
  Speaker 5: out with him and have him just You know, obviously he.
• 1:14:28
  Speaker 4: Does some personal assistant stuff, which is nice.
• 1:14:30
  Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah.
• 1:14:30
  Speaker 3: But my personal assistant stuff, he gets too high and
• 1:14:32
  Speaker 3: I have to keep track of all of his stuff.
• 1:14:33
  Speaker 3: That's the personal assistant stuff.
• 1:14:35
  Speaker 5: I mean, but he does... I just wanted to make
• 1:14:38
  Speaker 5: that clear. He also does stand up. He'll do like
• 1:14:41
  Speaker 5: 10 minutes in front of me and we do a
• 1:14:43
  Speaker 5: Q & A on stage. But it's the best time
• 1:14:45
  Speaker 5: I've ever had in my life.
• 1:14:46
  Speaker 2: Yeah.
• 1:14:46
  Speaker 4: If I'm going to give somebody the opportunity, why wouldn't
• 1:14:50
  Speaker 4: I give it.
• 1:14:50
  Speaker 2: I know.
• 1:14:50
  Speaker 4: It makes no sense to me.
• 1:14:51
  Speaker 2: The whole nepotism thing, I don't really have a problem
• 1:14:55
  Speaker 2: with because I'm like, It's the same thing, you know,
• 1:14:59
  Speaker 2: in a lot of businesses.
• 1:15:01
  Speaker 5: Most.
• 1:15:01
  Speaker 2: You know, or like even like a grip. You have
• 1:15:03
  Speaker 2: to be a grandfather. You've got to be a grip.
• 1:15:05
  Speaker 2: You've got to like it's very hard to get in
• 1:15:07
  Speaker 2: that business because of the unions and everything else. So, yeah,
• 1:15:10
  Speaker 2: it's hard.
• 1:15:11
  Speaker 4: It's relationships.
• 1:15:11
  Speaker 2: But also, and, you know, recently I was talking to
• 1:15:15
  Speaker 2: this firefighter at like this career day. And I was like, oh,
• 1:15:18
  Speaker 2: what's it like, you know, because I was always such
• 1:15:20
  Speaker 2: a hard, you know, such a great job to get,
• 1:15:22
  Speaker 2: such a desirable job. And he goes, and this is
• 1:15:25
  Speaker 2: what he said allegedly, okay? Not allegedly, he said it
• 1:15:28
  Speaker 2: to me. I don't know that he's telling the truth, okay?
• 1:15:30
  Speaker 2: This is what he told me. He did say, yes,
• 1:15:33
  Speaker 2: but we now are, we are told not to hire
• 1:15:39
  Speaker 2: the third generation firefighter.
• 1:15:41
  Speaker 7: Why not?
• 1:15:42
  Speaker 2: Because they need to have other people to be firefighters.
• 1:15:48
  Speaker 2: And I'm like, but I disagree with that because I'm like,
• 1:15:51
  Speaker 2: that kid knows the job. He knows what it's like
• 1:15:55
  Speaker 2: to be on 24 hours, off 24 hours, you know
• 1:15:58
  Speaker 2: what I mean? Just like if my, I knew real
• 1:16:00
  Speaker 2: estate because my parents are realtors. Someone knows an acting
• 1:16:03
  Speaker 2: world because they're, you know, you're around it. Someone whose
• 1:16:06
  Speaker 2: dad fixes cars most likely will be working on cars
• 1:16:09
  Speaker 2: when they're eight and be really good by 20. Like
• 1:16:11
  Speaker 2: that's not a bad thing that you do what your
• 1:16:14
  Speaker 2: parents do. Like, farmers had a bunch of kids so
• 1:16:17
  Speaker 2: that they would learn how to work the farm.
• 1:16:18
  Speaker 3: Yeah, that's right.
• 1:16:19
  Speaker 4: 100%.
• 1:16:20
  Speaker 5: And I'll tell you something else. He is pretty well
• 1:16:22
  Speaker 5: equipped because he's been around it. The attention doesn't he
• 1:16:26
  Speaker 5: doesn't get swept up in it. He's still a good dude.
• 1:16:29
  Speaker 5: You know, so for me, like like I said, should
• 1:16:33
  Speaker 5: I give it the opportunity to somebody that I don't know?
• 1:16:36
  Speaker 6: Right.
• 1:16:36
  Speaker 4: Why wouldn't I.
• 1:16:37
  Speaker 3: Fuck it up?
• 1:16:38
  Speaker 4: Like, yeah, well, you fuck.
• 1:16:39
  Speaker 2: Well, right.
• 1:16:40
  Speaker 3: But if someone fucks it up like I'm your kid,
• 1:16:42
  Speaker 3: it's easy to it's easy to tell me what to
• 1:16:44
  Speaker 3: do or what not to do for someone you just
• 1:16:46
  Speaker 3: met or don't know. It's probably a little more awkward.
• 1:16:49
  Speaker 4: It also fits in the business. We do a podcast together.
• 1:16:52
  Speaker 2: Well, Jim Gaffigan's son I know opens for him sometimes.
• 1:16:57
  Speaker 2: I want to say Dana Carvey's son.
• 1:16:58
  Speaker 4: Has done some stuff. Somebody takes their mom on the road.
• 1:17:01
  Speaker 2: Fortune has. But just not to do stand-up, but she's
• 1:17:04
  Speaker 2: highlighted her.
• 1:17:05
  Speaker 4: Somebody's mom opens for them.
• 1:17:07
  Speaker 2: Oh, really? I love that.
• 1:17:09
  Speaker 4: It's not Godfrey, but somebody's mom opens for them.
• 1:17:13
  Speaker 2: Well, Drake has just helped with production and stuff.
• 1:17:16
  Speaker 4: He's done great, though.
• 1:17:16
  Speaker 2: But when I did faint on my head, I did say,
• 1:17:20
  Speaker 2: get my son, you know, like, get my son. And
• 1:17:23
  Speaker 2: then all the women were like, saw him coming down.
• 1:17:27
  Speaker 2: And he told me this later. And I was like, oh,
• 1:17:29
  Speaker 2: I'm sorry about that. But they were like, oh, it's
• 1:17:31
  Speaker 2: Drakey Poo. It's Drakey Poo. Because I always have, like,
• 1:17:33
  Speaker 2: Drakey Poo. Like, that's his name, you know.
• 1:17:35
  Speaker 4: They were screaming that in Vegas. Bring out Drakey Poo.
• 1:17:39
  Speaker 4: And I was like, who the fuck is that?
• 1:17:43
  Speaker 2: But see, moms get it.
• 1:17:46
  Speaker 4: Yeah, yeah, yeah.
• 1:17:47
  Speaker 2: Moms get it. So anyway.
• 1:17:49
  Speaker 5: By the way, our meet and greet lines are so different.
• 1:17:52
  Speaker 4: His meet and greet lines are like these young, cool,
• 1:17:55
  Speaker 4: hip people.
• 1:17:57
  Speaker 5: And my meet and greet line are the people who
• 1:17:59
  Speaker 5: drove them here.
• 1:18:00
  Speaker 3: Do you know what I mean? It's either that or
• 1:18:03
  Speaker 3: it's the 40 or 50-year-old women and above who just
• 1:18:07
  Speaker 3: can't keep it in their pants. Those are the.
• 1:18:10
  Speaker 4: That's your meet and greet line?
• 1:18:11
  Speaker 3: No, that's your meet and greet line.
• 1:18:12
  Speaker 4: Yeah, that's what I'm saying.
• 1:18:14
  Speaker 3: Yeah.
• 1:18:14
  Speaker 2: Okay, wait. I want to get to something else.
• 1:18:16
  Speaker 4: Oh, here we go.
• 1:18:17
  Speaker 2: Next one. Now, this girl says she is suffering from
• 1:18:22
  Speaker 2: hot phobia, which means she's so hot that all the
• 1:18:25
  Speaker 2: other moms are mean to her at the school because
• 1:18:28
  Speaker 2: she dresses the way she wants, and she's like, too
• 1:18:32
  Speaker 2: bad that I have a good body, and she's not
• 1:18:35
  Speaker 2: getting invited to anything because according to her, The moms
• 1:18:38
  Speaker 2: all wear sweats and she's too hot. And I want
• 1:18:43
  Speaker 2: to ask you as a boy with a hot mom,
• 1:18:46
  Speaker 2: and unfortunately my kids have suffered to having a hot mom.
• 1:18:50
  Speaker 3: Yeah.
• 1:18:50
  Speaker 2: What is that like?
• 1:18:52
  Speaker 3: Well, I will say, like, growing up, because not only
• 1:18:55
  Speaker 3: do I have a hot mom, I apparently also have
• 1:18:57
  Speaker 3: a hot dad.
• 1:18:58
  Speaker 2: Okay.
• 1:18:59
  Speaker 3: So I got it from both sides. Growing up, it
• 1:19:01
  Speaker 3: was the girl saying, I want to fuck your dad.
• 1:19:02
  Speaker 2: Did really a girl actually say that to you?
• 1:19:05
  Speaker 3: There was a girl all through middle school and high school.
• 1:19:09
  Speaker 4: And middle school and high.
• 1:19:10
  Speaker 3: School who would just come up to me and just say,
• 1:19:12
  Speaker 3: how's your dad? And I'm like, fuck off. Like, what
• 1:19:15
  Speaker 3: is wrong with you?
• 1:19:16
  Speaker 4: You're, like, 13.
• 1:19:16
  Speaker 3: Chill out.
• 1:19:17
  Speaker 6: Like.
• 1:19:19
  Speaker 3: Yo, it was funny. After high school and everything, we're
• 1:19:22
  Speaker 3: grown people. I was working catering at a Dan Bilzerian party.
• 1:19:26
  Speaker 2: Okay. Dan Bilzerian, let me just remind you. By the way,
• 1:19:29
  Speaker 2: I've been obsessed with this cat for years. His cat? No,
• 1:19:33
  Speaker 2: this guy. I would like to still go to one
• 1:19:36
  Speaker 2: of his parties. I've interviewed his former girlfriend. He's the
• 1:19:39
  Speaker 2: one that he has a weed business, but he always
• 1:19:41
  Speaker 2: has these videos of all these amazing girls. Okay, go on.
• 1:19:44
  Speaker 3: By the way, his weed is terrible.
• 1:19:46
  Speaker 2: Okay, go on.
• 1:19:47
  Speaker 3: But so this crazy house parties, and she showed up
• 1:19:50
  Speaker 3: to one. And I was catering, and I was working it.
• 1:19:52
  Speaker 2: It was the middle school horny girl.
• 1:19:53
  Speaker 3: Yeah, yeah, yeah. So we're now probably 2021.
• 1:19:55
  Speaker 2: Shocked that she's there.
• 1:19:56
  Speaker 4: Yeah.
• 1:19:56
  Speaker 3: What she grew up to be. Yeah, right? I was
• 1:20:00
  Speaker 3: not as stunned, but also I was like, well, I
• 1:20:04
  Speaker 3: guess they fucking let anybody in here now.
• 1:20:06
  Speaker 2: Yeah.
• 1:20:07
  Speaker 3: And she, the first, she was the first question she
• 1:20:09
  Speaker 3: asked me, hey, do you remember who I am? I
• 1:20:10
  Speaker 3: was like, yeah. I was like, you're the girl who
• 1:20:12
  Speaker 3: still wants to fuck my dad. And she goes, you
• 1:20:14
  Speaker 3: said still. I go, am I wrong? She goes, no,
• 1:20:16
  Speaker 3: how is he? And I was like, fuck off. Like,
• 1:20:19
  Speaker 3: first of all, I'm working. Second of all, pick one
• 1:20:21
  Speaker 3: of the thousand 20 year olds that are here that
• 1:20:24
  Speaker 3: are Maybe within your league. Why are you going for
• 1:20:27
  Speaker 3: a 53-year-old dude who's married?
• 1:20:28
  Speaker 2: So wait, are there young guys at those parties? I
• 1:20:30
  Speaker 2: thought they were more like a playboy party where it's
• 1:20:32
  Speaker 2: just all hot girls and like a couple guys. No.
• 1:20:35
  Speaker 3: So the house that I used to cater for him at,
• 1:20:37
  Speaker 3: he no longer has anymore. He had gotten to some
• 1:20:39
  Speaker 3: big tax evasion, money laundering.
• 1:20:42
  Speaker 4: That's crazy. I never saw that coming.
• 1:20:45
  Speaker 3: So he lost a whole bunch of stuff, including that house.
• 1:20:48
  Speaker 3: So that house was all like, it was like influencers.
• 1:20:51
  Speaker 3: He was probably the oldest dude there. And so there
• 1:20:54
  Speaker 3: was nobody.
• 1:20:56
  Speaker 4: Is he like mid-30s? How old is he?
• 1:20:58
  Speaker 2: He's got to be like 45.
• 1:20:59
  Speaker 3: Yeah, so he was probably the oldest dude there. But, yeah,
• 1:21:03
  Speaker 3: every girl there, like the ratio was pretty ridiculous. It
• 1:21:07
  Speaker 3: was like 10 to 1.
• 1:21:07
  Speaker 2: Okay, let me get back to the hot mom story.
• 1:21:09
  Speaker 2: Now tell me what it's like to have a hot mom.
• 1:21:12
  Speaker 3: I wouldn't say frustrating, but I got the same thing
• 1:21:15
  Speaker 3: with dudes growing up. Like, I want to fuck your mom.
• 1:21:17
  Speaker 3: Some of my closest friends in high school, we would
• 1:21:20
  Speaker 3: be drinking on some nights. And some conversation would come
• 1:21:23
  Speaker 3: up and I'd look at some of my friends and
• 1:21:24
  Speaker 3: I'd go, say it.
• 1:21:25
  Speaker 4: And they're like, what?
• 1:21:26
  Speaker 3: And I'd go, say what's on your mind. I know
• 1:21:27
  Speaker 3: what's on your mind. It's apparently been on your mind
• 1:21:29
  Speaker 3: for a long time. Say it so you can feel better.
• 1:21:32
  Speaker 3: And they're like, I don't want to say it. I'm like,
• 1:21:34
  Speaker 3: fucking say it so we can all move past it.
• 1:21:37
  Speaker 3: And all of them would just scream, your mom's fucking hot.
• 1:21:39
  Speaker 3: I'm like, great. Can we move on now?
• 1:21:40
  Speaker 2: Yeah.
• 1:21:41
  Speaker 3: So I'm like, closest friends. And I'm like, guys. You
• 1:21:43
  Speaker 3: know she comes in and brings us cinnamon rolls and
• 1:21:46
  Speaker 3: all these weird things. I'm like, what do you think
• 1:21:48
  Speaker 3: she's bringing in every time she walks in? What's the thought?
• 1:21:52
  Speaker 5: I would see, like I caught one of his friends
• 1:21:56
  Speaker 5: checking Beth out at the house. So Beth walked by
• 1:22:00
  Speaker 5: and he was just like this.
• 1:22:02
  Speaker 4: And he looked up and I was just looking at
• 1:22:03
  Speaker 4: him like.
• 1:22:06
  Speaker 4: And he was just like, and I go, yeah.
• 1:22:08
  Speaker 3: Yeah, yeah.
• 1:22:09
  Speaker 4: It's all right.
• 1:22:11
  Speaker 3: It was definitely annoying getting that comment all the time,
• 1:22:13
  Speaker 3: but for this woman, boo-hoo, cry me a river. You're
• 1:22:17
  Speaker 3: a grown person.
• 1:22:17
  Speaker 2: So Brandon's at Crespi, which is all the boys' school,
• 1:22:20
  Speaker 2: and when we were practicing the driving, well, prior to that, well,
• 1:22:26
  Speaker 2: when we were practicing the driving, then he did say,
• 1:22:28
  Speaker 2: I don't want you switching out of the car because
• 1:22:34
  Speaker 2: I'm wearing shorts. And I was like, okay. And I'm like,
• 1:22:38
  Speaker 2: all right, you know, like, I won't, because I'd get
• 1:22:41
  Speaker 2: around the car and the kids would be waiting. And,
• 1:22:43
  Speaker 2: you know, apparently these legs are still something to be
• 1:22:46
  Speaker 2: talked about. And prior to that, he did one time
• 1:22:49
  Speaker 2: tell me that this kid... would give him shit and say, oh,
• 1:22:53
  Speaker 2: your mom's hot. Well, now, of course, I put a
• 1:22:56
  Speaker 2: huge smile on my face. And I was like, that
• 1:22:58
  Speaker 2: is terrible. I can't believe I'm paying all this money
• 1:23:01
  Speaker 2: for you to get bullied. And I'm like, I've got
• 1:23:04
  Speaker 2: to call them. I was like, ooh, which hot male
• 1:23:07
  Speaker 2: teacher should I call and complain to? Hi.
• 1:23:10
  Speaker 4: Some kids are saying I'm hot.
• 1:23:13
  Speaker 2: I told Drake the story, and I go, you know,
• 1:23:15
  Speaker 2: isn't that terrible, Brandon? And he goes, I go, they
• 1:23:18
  Speaker 2: thought that this kid thinks I'm hot. And Drake's like, Mom,
• 1:23:22
  Speaker 2: they don't think you're hot. That's just a way to
• 1:23:23
  Speaker 2: give them some shit. And I was like, fuck you.
• 1:23:25
  Speaker 4: Yeah, that's not the answer I wanted at all.
• 1:23:27
  Speaker 3: He popped your bubble real quick.
• 1:23:29
  Speaker 2: That's what people just do to give them shit. Okay,
• 1:23:32
  Speaker 2: I'm going to end on this story. I thought it
• 1:23:34
  Speaker 2: was so crazy.
• 1:23:35
  Speaker 3: Oh, yeah, okay.
• 1:23:36
  Speaker 2: So tell the story if you know it.
• 1:23:37
  Speaker 3: So I follow Hollywood Unlocked, too. This is where I
• 1:23:39
  Speaker 3: get all of my. Yeah.
• 1:23:40
  Speaker 4: Is this in Serbia or something?
• 1:23:43
  Speaker 3: No, it's in China. I know, I think. So a
• 1:23:46
  Speaker 3: dude goes to date. He matches with this girl on
• 1:23:48
  Speaker 3: a dating site and they go to a dinner and
• 1:23:51
  Speaker 3: she is accompanied by 23 of her relatives. And then
• 1:23:55
  Speaker 3: after they all eat, he was like, yo, I'm not paying.
• 1:23:59
  Speaker 3: Like you, there's no way I'm paying for you and
• 1:24:01
  Speaker 3: your 23 family members.
• 1:24:02
  Speaker 2: Wait.
• 1:24:02
  Speaker 3: Wait, they had dinner?
• 1:24:04
  Speaker 7: Yes.
• 1:24:05
  Speaker 3: Yes, he stayed for the dinner. And after they ate,
• 1:24:07
  Speaker 3: it was like $ 3, 500, he left. And then they tried
• 1:24:10
  Speaker 3: to sue her, or sue him, and she was like,
• 1:24:12
  Speaker 3: you have to at least pay for our food. Or
• 1:24:17
  Speaker 3: pay for the whole thing. And he goes, well, I
• 1:24:18
  Speaker 3: might pay for our food, but the rest of you
• 1:24:20
  Speaker 3: got to figure your shit out.
• 1:24:22
  Speaker 2: Yeah, so they sued him to pay the bill, but
• 1:24:25
  Speaker 2: the judge sided with him to only pay like $ 197
• 1:24:29
  Speaker 2: for him and the one girl's food.
• 1:24:31
  Speaker 3: But like, first of all, don't judge.
• 1:24:32
  Speaker 4: Don't judge.
• 1:24:33
  Speaker 2: I just thought that was very funny, like to imagine like,
• 1:24:36
  Speaker 2: I mean, listen, there has been, there were, but there
• 1:24:39
  Speaker 2: were times when I would have a hot friend that
• 1:24:42
  Speaker 2: would be like, you want to go to the club,
• 1:24:45
  Speaker 2: you know, want to go to the thing. And we knew,
• 1:24:48
  Speaker 2: you know, she's going to take one for the team,
• 1:24:51
  Speaker 2: but we're all going to get crab legs.
• 1:24:52
  Speaker 4: That's right.
• 1:24:53
  Speaker 3: Yeah, absolutely.
• 1:24:54
  Speaker 2: And that guy knows I to be with this girl,
• 1:24:58
  Speaker 2: like I am going to have to pay for all
• 1:25:00
  Speaker 2: these people. So there's that. But this guy was definitely blindsided.
• 1:25:04
  Speaker 3: Twenty three seems like people like that.
• 1:25:06
  Speaker 4: You might be able to squeeze to twenty three.
• 1:25:10
  Speaker 2: It seems like overkill.
• 1:25:11
  Speaker 3: What are you taking? Four cars? Or a whole ass bus.
• 1:25:15
  Speaker 3: They showed up in a Greyhound to this dinner.
• 1:25:18
  Speaker 4: But if he shows up first and he's like, yeah,
• 1:25:20
  Speaker 4: table for two. And then 23 other people show up.
• 1:25:23
  Speaker 4: We're going to.
• 1:25:24
  Speaker 2: Need the banquet room?
• 1:25:26
  Speaker 4: What happens?
• 1:25:27
  Speaker 3: It's crazy.
• 1:25:29
  Speaker 4: Oh my lord. I would love to know Did she
• 1:25:32
  Speaker 4: find him on a website?
• 1:25:33
  Speaker 2: Yeah.
• 1:25:34
  Speaker 4: Where were there like a lot of rich dudes? So
• 1:25:36
  Speaker 4: she was expecting. I mean, who knows? Possibly.
• 1:25:38
  Speaker 2: I didn't go that deep. But yeah, she was trying. Yeah.
• 1:25:41
  Speaker 4: What's your max? What's your max? Somebody walks in with
• 1:25:44
  Speaker 4: maybe two friends.
• 1:25:46
  Speaker 3: You want to know what my max is? You walk
• 1:25:47
  Speaker 3: in with you, yourself and you. Nobody else. You walk
• 1:25:49
  Speaker 3: in with someone else.
• 1:25:50
  Speaker 2: Have you ever had that?
• 1:25:52
  Speaker 3: No, thankfully not. But I'll tell you right now, if
• 1:25:54
  Speaker 3: I watch with a girl on Tinder and she's like, oh,
• 1:25:56
  Speaker 3: I'm bringing my friend. I'd be like, cool.
• 1:25:57
  Speaker 4: I'm going to bring a friend.
• 1:25:58
  Speaker 3: Because we'll match. And if she says no, I'm like, great,
• 1:26:01
  Speaker 3: we'll do.
• 1:26:01
  Speaker 4: A date a different day.
• 1:26:02
  Speaker 3: I'm so glad. I'm not showing up expecting one and
• 1:26:05
  Speaker 3: paying for three.
• 1:26:06
  Speaker 2: And also, if she's bringing a girlfriend, she's not that interested.
• 1:26:09
  Speaker 3: That's right. 100%. She's just like.
• 1:26:11
  Speaker 2: Oh, my God. I'm dreading this date. Why did I agree?
• 1:26:15
  Speaker 2: At least if you come, we can laugh about them after.
• 1:26:18
  Speaker 3: And it means your two-week paycheck.
• 1:26:21
  Speaker 2: We can do a podcast about them after.
• 1:26:23
  Speaker 3: It means your job hasn't paid you yet, and you
• 1:26:25
  Speaker 3: guys want to get a free meal. That's fine. Not
• 1:26:27
  Speaker 3: with me.
• 1:26:27
  Speaker 6: Yeah.
• 1:26:28
  Speaker 5: I'm so glad I never had to deal with dating apps.
• 1:26:32
  Speaker 2: I know.
• 1:26:32
  Speaker 4: I'm so fucking.
• 1:26:34
  Speaker 2: Because I think it can be like a great ego
• 1:26:36
  Speaker 2: boost and the worst.
• 1:26:37
  Speaker 4: And the worst at the same time.
• 1:26:39
  Speaker 3: I would say I was happy, but I met my
• 1:26:40
  Speaker 3: girlfriend on a dating app.
• 1:26:41
  Speaker 4: Exactly. I'll take it.
• 1:26:42
  Speaker 2: We don't want to say you have a girlfriend. We're
• 1:26:43
  Speaker 2: trying to get some chicks to go to your show.
• 1:26:45
  Speaker 3: Oh, well, they can go to the show, but if
• 1:26:46
  Speaker 3: they see the Instagram page, they'll.
• 1:26:47
  Speaker 2: See you're on there. I'm just kidding. Tell everybody what
• 1:26:50
  Speaker 2: is going on and where they can see you guys
• 1:26:52
  Speaker 2: and tune into your podcast and everything.
• 1:26:54
  Speaker 5: We have a podcast called Hey Man where he and I,
• 1:26:57
  Speaker 5: it's funny, he admits things like that I didn't know.
• 1:27:02
  Speaker 5: He was like, did I ever tell you about I
• 1:27:03
  Speaker 5: used to steal yours and mom's cars and do donuts
• 1:27:06
  Speaker 5: in the parking lots?
• 1:27:07
  Speaker 4: I'm like, what? So he admits to things on every show.
• 1:27:10
  Speaker 6: Yeah.
• 1:27:11
  Speaker 4: But it's such a great, we have a great time.
• 1:27:13
  Speaker 5: We have a lot of serious life talks.
• 1:27:15
  Speaker 3: Yeah. It's a good, it's a good mixture of laughter
• 1:27:17
  Speaker 3: and heart. It really shows like for our, like our
• 1:27:19
  Speaker 3: true father son relationship. Like, you know, we, we had
• 1:27:22
  Speaker 3: a health talk the other day and that went the
• 1:27:24
  Speaker 3: full hour or we talk about any random shit or
• 1:27:27
  Speaker 3: high school memories from both of us.
• 1:27:28
  Speaker 1: So.
• 1:27:29
  Speaker 3: It really is a total encapsule of everything of who
• 1:27:32
  Speaker 3: we are as a relationship. So it's been a whole
• 1:27:36
  Speaker 3: bunch of fun.
• 1:27:36
  Speaker 4: Yeah, it's been a good time. I love that. And
• 1:27:38
  Speaker 4: then he comes on the road with me every weekend.
• 1:27:39
  Speaker 4: So it's he and I. He does stand up up front.
• 1:27:43
  Speaker 4: I do some in the middle. We do a Q
• 1:27:44
  Speaker 4: & A. I bring out the guitar. It's a two-man show.
• 1:27:47
  Speaker 2: And everybody follow you guys where and get the tickets where?
• 1:27:51
  Speaker 5: Comedianjoshwolf.com for tickets. And just go to my YouTube channel
• 1:27:56
  Speaker 5: or anywhere you get podcasts.
• 1:27:58
  Speaker 3: Yeah, he's Josh Wolf Comedy on all platforms, so he
• 1:28:00
  Speaker 3: posts some stuff there. But, yeah, Hey Man on any
• 1:28:02
  Speaker 3: social media or any podcast site, wherever you get them, Spotify, Apple,
• 1:28:06
  Speaker 3: all that good stuff.
• 1:28:07
  Speaker 2: Josh and Jacob, the dynamic comedic duo, Father-Son Delight.
• 1:28:13
  Speaker 4: Father.
• 1:28:15
  Speaker 3: I'm not going to lie, that should be the name
• 1:28:17
  Speaker 3: of the podcast. Father-Son Delight is amazing. Sounds like an
• 1:28:21
  Speaker 3: ice cream. Yeah, it's... Honestly, it sounds dirty, but it's not.
• 1:28:26
  Speaker 4: I like it, I like it.
• 1:28:27
  Speaker 3: Yeah, I love that.
• 1:28:28
  Speaker 2: Okay, love you guys.
• 1:28:29
  Speaker 4: Bye. Those thoughts.
• 1:28:31
  Speaker 6: You know the ones I mean. The doesn't matter, it's
• 1:28:34
  Speaker 6: nothing thoughts that become kind of something become a bit much.
• 1:28:39
  Speaker 6: And day by day, the world feels heavier and you're
• 1:28:41
  Speaker 6: holding it together just fine until suddenly you're not. You
• 1:28:46
  Speaker 6: don't have to navigate it alone. Learn how to manage
• 1:28:49
  Speaker 6: everyday pressures and unhelpful thoughts with six weekly sessions from Aware.
• 1:28:53
  Speaker 6: Find out more about the free resilience program at aware.ie.
• 1:28:57
  Speaker 7: Aware.
• 1:28:58
  Speaker 2: This could be the start of something better.