Latest / feel your feelings with Ethan Jewell / the dark side of social media
Transcript
- 0:00Our phones and social media has become an undeniably large part
- 0:04of our lives. I personally spend more time
- 0:07than I'd like to admit on my phone and scrolling on social
- 0:10media. All of it seems very, very
- 0:13harmless A majority of the time. However, I've noticed in my own
- 0:17time the negative impacts that spending time on social media
- 0:21can have. And I've seen more and more
- 0:23around me that people are not connecting on social media the
- 0:27way they used to. And actually, instead of being
- 0:30social, social media is driving us apart and it's ruining our
- 0:35mental health. So today, let's talk about it.
- 0:39We'll discuss what exactly social media is doing to us
- 0:41mentally, how they want every single second of your attention
- 0:45span and how ultimately this is very, very bad for us.
- 0:49I want to remind you, I am not a therapist, I'm not a
- 0:52psychologist, and I'm not a professional in the mental
- 0:55health industry. I'm a normal guy who has felt
- 0:57some big feelings and wants to start the discussion on mental
- 1:00health. And it's crucial that we talk
- 1:02about technology, our phones and the way that it's impacting us
- 1:06every single day. My name is Ethan Jewell and
- 1:10welcome back to Feel Your Feelings.
- 1:15Social media is a really, really big part of many of our lives.
- 1:20I know, especially over the pandemic when there really
- 1:24wasn't much else to do. Social media found an even
- 1:27bigger following than it already had.
- 1:29I know during the pandemic I sometimes found myself spending
- 1:3210 plus hours a day on my phone. And let me tell you, it doesn't
- 1:38feel good are phones, social media.
- 1:42It feels relatively innocent to spend a lot of time on them.
- 1:46However, if you really dig deep and if you really focus on how
- 1:50it makes you feel, you will realize that you are being
- 1:53robbed of your attention. You are being robbed of your
- 1:56time yourself. Esteem is being hurt and slowly
- 1:59but surely you are becoming addicted to this technology.
- 2:04Now if you do a little bit of self reflection right now and
- 2:07you think that you absolutely do not have a problem and that you
- 2:11can use social media in your phone with no issues, then I
- 2:15respect you and this episode is not for you.
- 2:17However, for a majority of people you need to understand
- 2:21the impacts that your phone can have and in fact the highly
- 2:25addictive nature of social media we see.
- 2:28Short form content has become increasingly popular over the
- 2:32years, especially with the apps of Vine and TikTok really
- 2:36leading the storm. Social media used to be entirely
- 2:39about longer videos like what YouTube is today, but over the
- 2:43past few years there has been a massive surge in short form
- 2:47content. Unfortunately, this content is
- 2:51incredibly addictive, and it takes up an incredible amount of
- 2:54time. You see, the addictive nature of
- 2:57short form social media comes from something known as random
- 3:00reinforcement. This means that even if the
- 3:03video you're watching isn't good, the thought that the next
- 3:07video might be keeps you scrolling.
- 3:11See, this isn't as big of a problem in other forms of media
- 3:14consumption, such as movies or YouTube videos.
- 3:18If there's a bad movie or YouTube video, you just turn it
- 3:20off. But with short form content.
- 3:23The fact that the next video might be better and that it's
- 3:25only 1 short swipe away gives way to an almost gambling like
- 3:30addiction. I don't mean to compare
- 3:32addictions, but it is very similar.
- 3:35The what if of the next video is simply addicting.
- 3:40These apps are literally designed to hold your attention.
- 3:44These apps entire livelihood, the money that they make.
- 3:47The survivability of the app itself is built upon its ability
- 3:51to hold your attention. Attempting to lead you into a
- 3:54constant state of scrolling attention is money, and if they
- 3:59can hold your attention, then they have 1:00.
- 4:02Because of this, these apps have been designed to be as easy as
- 4:06possible for you to give your attention span and time away.
- 4:10Instead of having to commit to a movie for two hours, you can
- 4:13simply tell yourself, I'll just watch a few videos before
- 4:16leading to hours of scrolling. But there's no engagement,
- 4:20There's no social aspect of this social media.
- 4:24It's distracting, it's consuming, and it's detrimental.
- 4:29So what exactly is the downside of all this?
- 4:32What is the downside of the way that social medias have been
- 4:36designed to grab your attention? I mean, isn't that a good thing
- 4:40that means you're entertained if your attention has been grabbed
- 4:43for so long? Well, one of the biggest harms
- 4:46is that we often use scrolling as a way to distract from
- 4:50feelings. Our attention spans are being
- 4:53destroyed and our overall mental well-being is in danger.
- 4:58I think we can all agree that using an addictive substance in
- 5:02order to distract from feelings, it's highly, highly detrimental.
- 5:06I mean, I talk all the time in this podcast about how important
- 5:10it is to feel your feelings and how without that we lose a lot
- 5:14of our connection to our emotions, our connection to
- 5:16other people. We have things pile up and
- 5:19eventually spill over. Using substances to distract is
- 5:23very widely accepted as a bad or negative thing.
- 5:28However, when it comes to something addictive, such as
- 5:31social media, our attitudes suddenly change.
- 5:36Now, I do not think that social media is as bad as most
- 5:40addictive drugs. I am not saying that at all.
- 5:43However, it is often used in a similar nature, The same way
- 5:48that some mind altering substances are used to numb out
- 5:51feelings. Many people engage in mindless
- 5:55scrolling in order to distract from feelings, and this is one
- 5:59of the biggest harms of social media.
- 6:02The addictive nature of these apps already is harmful because
- 6:06it's taking away our precious, precious time.
- 6:09It's sucking us into a different world, one that we cannot live
- 6:12within. But there's another layer of
- 6:15harm when we are literally using it to numb out our feelings,
- 6:19when we are using it to numb out real life.
- 6:22This dulls your ability to feel things.
- 6:25This makes you turn to this addictive habit instead of
- 6:29actually facing what you need to feel.
- 6:32And that is highly detrimental. Now some people may argue that
- 6:37it's good because it's just entertainment and it's fine to
- 6:40turn to entertainment in order to avoid feelings, but I want to
- 6:44ask you, what were the last five short form videos you watched?
- 6:51Can you truly recall any videos? Are they are they adding any
- 6:55substance to your life? Or are you using scrolling as a
- 7:01way to numb out feelings? This is just something to think
- 7:07about. I want you to do some self
- 7:09reflection. I personally have been doing a
- 7:11lot of self reflection around this and I find more often than
- 7:15not I'm using scrolling as a way to numb out and I can't even
- 7:19remember the videos that I'm watching.
- 7:21It's just completely mindless content that I'm using to avoid
- 7:26feeling my feelings. I think this is something that
- 7:29needs to be talked about. I think it's something that's
- 7:31more common than we think and something that is being
- 7:35completely ignored altogether. If this scrolling truly feels as
- 7:39though it's enriching your life, then I don't want to completely
- 7:43talk bad on social media. I love social media.
- 7:46I found a career in social media.
- 7:48I found a community. However, we need to understand
- 7:52the potential downsides. Our attention span is also being
- 7:56affected when we are only watching videos that are 10 to
- 8:0020 seconds long. That becomes the new normal for
- 8:05our brains. That is the amount of content
- 8:07and entertainment that our brains are used to getting.
- 8:10I know I find it harder and harder to sit down and watch a
- 8:13movie because I'm so used to the short form content that I've
- 8:18been consuming for the past few years.
- 8:21I find it hard to focus. I find it hard to sit down and
- 8:25have long conversations and it has truly affected my life.
- 8:30Now I'm aware of this, so I'm making steps to lower screen
- 8:33time and spend less time on social media and I've already
- 8:37felt the effects. I'm not completely cutting it
- 8:39out of my life. That's unrealistic.
- 8:42And once again, I don't want to sound like a total downer.
- 8:45Social media has its benefits, but we need to be aware.
- 8:49We need to know that it can be used as a distraction method.
- 8:53We need to know that it can lower our attention spans and it
- 8:56can take time away from truly meaningful things.
- 9:01The human experience is a beautiful thing.
- 9:04The feelings that we can feel, the deep emotional connections
- 9:08that we can kindle, the relationships we can have, and
- 9:11the things that we can experience should not be taken
- 9:14for granted. There's a whole beautiful world
- 9:16out there and I'm afraid that many of us are wasting away our
- 9:21time on these apps. There's so much to do, so many
- 9:26people to meet, and so many things to experience.
- 9:30So I want you to ask yourself, is social media truly enriching
- 9:34your life? Or are you scrolling just to
- 9:37scroll after doing some self reflection?
- 9:41Maybe consider taking action, depending on your answer.
- 9:44For me personally, I've been slowly trying to cut social
- 9:47media out and maybe that is the answer for you as well.
- 9:51So make sure that your scrolling is doing something beneficial
- 9:56for you. That's going to wrap it up for
- 9:58today's episode. This episode was a little bit
- 10:01more ranty and preachy than normal.
- 10:03That's just because it's a topic that I'm relatively passionate
- 10:06about and have a very close connection to.
- 10:09If you need help feeling your feelings at any point, please
- 10:12check out my music on all platforms under the name of
- 10:15Ethan Jewell and I almost guarantee it'll make you cry.
- 10:18Shoot me a message on my Instagram at Jewel Boy under
- 10:22score, which is a little ironic since this episode was all about
- 10:26social media. And let me know what you thought
- 10:28about today's episode. So thank you for being here.
- 10:31Thank you for taking the time to understand what social media
- 10:35could be doing to you. And as always, thank you for
- 10:38feeling your feelings. I'll see you next time.