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Stop Trying To Be Superwoman · Divas That Care Network

• 0:00
  SPEAKER_02: It's Divas the Care Radio.
• 0:02
  SPEAKER_02: Stories, strategies, and ideas to inspire positive change.
• 0:06
  SPEAKER_02: Welcome to Divas That Care, a network of women committed to making our world a better place for everyone.
• 0:13
  SPEAKER_02: This is a global movement for women, by women engaged in a collaborative effort to create a better world for future generations.
• 0:20
  SPEAKER_02: To find out more about the movement, visit divas that care.com after the show.
• 0:26
  SPEAKER_02: Right now, though, stay tuned for another jolt of inspiration.
• 0:31
  SPEAKER_03: Welcome back to Confidence in Bloom.
• 0:34
  SPEAKER_03: Today's conversation is one I think so many women need to hear.
• 0:37
  SPEAKER_03: We're talking about something that can completely change the way we experience success.
• 0:42
  SPEAKER_03: Collaboration over competition.
• 0:45
  SPEAKER_03: My guest today is Ching Shudig, a health and lifestyle entrepreneur who helps women improve their energy, metabolism, and income simultaneously.
• 0:55
  SPEAKER_03: Originally from Singapore and now living in Florida, Ching has traveled to more than 100 countries and has built her life around a belief that I absolutely love.
• 1:05
  SPEAKER_03: Time freedom isn't a luxury, it's a decision.
• 1:09
  SPEAKER_03: What really drew me to Qing's story is what happened when she faced her own health challenges, including an elevated A1C and osteoporosis.
• 1:18
  SPEAKER_03: She didn't figure it all out alone.
• 1:20
  SPEAKER_03: She had women around her who shared what was working for them, offered knowledge, and helped her find her way forward.
• 1:27
  SPEAKER_03: And rather than keeping that experience to herself, it became part of how Chang continues to live and build today.
• 1:34
  SPEAKER_03: She believes that another woman's win takes nothing away from our own.
• 1:38
  SPEAKER_03: In fact, it can open a door.
• 1:41
  SPEAKER_03: I think that idea goes far beyond business.
• 1:44
  SPEAKER_03: How different world our lives be?
• 1:47
  SPEAKER_03: How different, oh my goodness, how different would our lives be if we stopped seeing other women as competition and started seeing them as collaborators, resources, mentors, partners, cheerleaders, and sometimes even the woman who has exactly the piece of information we need.
• 2:04
  SPEAKER_03: So welcome, Ting.
• 2:05
  SPEAKER_03: I'm so excited to have you here today.
• 2:08
  SPEAKER_03: Thanks, Tina.
• 2:09
  SPEAKER_03: I'm so so excited as well.
• 2:12
  SPEAKER_03: Yes, yes.
• 2:13
  SPEAKER_03: So we're gonna start with a question about your health challenges that you've had in the past.
• 2:18
  SPEAKER_03: Um, you learned that you had osteoporosis and issues with your A1C, and I believe that's a blood sugar um uh level, right?
• 2:28
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah.
• 2:29
  SPEAKER_03: Okay, so now obviously you didn't figure things out on your own.
• 2:34
  SPEAKER_03: You needed to, you know, share what you were experiencing and learn from others uh what had worked for them.
• 2:42
  SPEAKER_03: So can you take us back to that time?
• 2:45
  SPEAKER_03: Was there a particular woman or conversation or moment that made you realize just how important or how powerful it was to have them share what they already knew?
• 2:57
  SPEAKER_01: Well, it's not a particular woman, it's several women, um, including men as well.
• 3:07
  SPEAKER_01: But one particular one was um Osteostrong.
• 3:15
  SPEAKER_01: The the company Osteostrong, okay, it it made me think that you know just taking vitamins is not enough, just exercising is not enough, you have to lift weights, you have to uh although they actually did not help me particularly because their their method uh did not really um I I would I went to them for one and a half years and it did not help me personally.
• 3:53
  SPEAKER_01: I know it helped several other women, but from that experience I searched for other um exercises that I had to do, so it's it's a learning curve, it's learning from other people, and um and you know, trying to uh research it's all all research that and also using myself as a guinea pig.
• 4:30
  SPEAKER_03: Right, right.
• 4:31
  SPEAKER_03: And isn't that the truth?
• 4:32
  SPEAKER_03: A guinea pig is the best way to describe that.
• 4:35
  SPEAKER_03: So this company, I'm assuming it's a US company or is it worldwide?
• 4:40
  SPEAKER_03: It's a US company.
• 4:42
  SPEAKER_03: U.S.
• 4:42
  SPEAKER_03: company.
• 4:43
  SPEAKER_03: So they they kind of walk you through like what osteoporosis is, how your body's gonna deal with it, and then how you can sort of survive through it.
• 4:53
  SPEAKER_03: Is that how that works?
• 4:55
  SPEAKER_01: No, no, no.
• 4:57
  SPEAKER_01: The the the group that did that was on Facebook.
• 5:04
  SPEAKER_01: It's called Naturally Reversing Osteoporosis.
• 5:09
  SPEAKER_01: And uh it was actually a guy uh who who started it, and he he was uh, I mean, he is a um clinical nutritionist, and he put out you know a lot of information about osteoporosis and how you can do it naturally.
• 5:30
  SPEAKER_01: And but there are lots of women in that group, so we would ask questions, and I learn, I learned from their questions and his answers, and you know, and also other women help, you know, putting in the experience.
• 5:48
  SPEAKER_01: So yeah, and and that that helped.
• 5:54
  SPEAKER_03: Right, and so it wasn't just exercises, it was nutrition, it was exercise.
• 5:59
  SPEAKER_03: I would think there's a bit of mindset in there, right?
• 6:02
  SPEAKER_03: Because you have to see past what it could be, right?
• 6:06
  SPEAKER_03: That's a mindset shift, right?
• 6:08
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah, and yeah, especially mindset, because the doctors keep telling you, you know, you are you know, you are so far beyond uh you are so far into osteoporosis, nothing else helps except medication.
• 6:29
  SPEAKER_01: And you know, all the doctors say that.
• 6:33
  SPEAKER_01: So a lot of women just believed it and take it, and then a few years later they will fracture, you know.
• 6:40
  SPEAKER_01: So I don't want to go that route.
• 6:44
  SPEAKER_01: I want to try.
• 6:47
  SPEAKER_01: I have tried for many years.
• 6:49
  SPEAKER_01: I could have given up, I almost did, but some somehow I know that um, you know, if you give your body enough of what it wants, it will turn around.
• 7:07
  SPEAKER_01: And finally it did.
• 7:10
  SPEAKER_01: You know, I have been uh I I was diagnosed with osteopina like 20 years ago, and only last year I had the positive results that make me feel that I'm doing the right thing.
• 7:30
  SPEAKER_03: Wow, okay, and so from 20 years ago to just now, what did you change?
• 7:37
  SPEAKER_03: I mean, I know 20 years is a long time to be struggling with the same issue, but now you're feeling that you've sort of got a grip on it.
• 7:45
  SPEAKER_03: What did you change in the last you, you know, probably two or three years that has made the difference that you feel?
• 7:53
  SPEAKER_01: Lift weighting, lifting weights, lifting weights, uh protein.
• 8:01
  SPEAKER_01: You know, we think that well, I I think the RDA says that you you need, I I can't remember exactly, like 0.6 grams of protein per pound of your body weight.
• 8:18
  SPEAKER_01: That's not enough, especially for someone who has osteoporosis.
• 8:23
  SPEAKER_01: Uh because if you don't have muscle, you know, as we age, we we we lose muscle.
• 8:31
  SPEAKER_01: And the muscle pulls the bones.
• 8:36
  SPEAKER_01: So if you don't have enough muscle, it's not going to improve your bone density, right?
• 8:42
  SPEAKER_03: It's gonna but it's gonna cause more damage than it's going to protect them.
• 8:48
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah, yeah.
• 8:49
  SPEAKER_01: So in the last couple of years, I was um improve increasing my intake of protein.
• 9:00
  SPEAKER_01: And and that I think is the main thing that helped.
• 9:05
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah, I have to be honest, that doesn't that does not impress me.
• 9:09
  SPEAKER_03: And I don't mean no offense.
• 9:10
  SPEAKER_03: The protein, it is so hard to get protein in, right?
• 9:15
  SPEAKER_03: Did you have did you struggle with that?
• 9:17
  SPEAKER_03: Because I I struggle with protein.
• 9:19
  SPEAKER_01: Yes, yes, that's why you know you when you plan your meal, plan the protein first.
• 9:28
  SPEAKER_01: So I I take like 40 to 50 grams of protein in my breakfast.
• 9:37
  SPEAKER_01: And then yeah, and it's not difficult because my protein powder gives me 25 grams of protein, and then I put yogurt in it, and yogurt has protein as well as high is high in calcium, which we need, right?
• 9:57
  SPEAKER_01: And and then I put I put like um um vegetables like uh arugula, which gives you a lot of calcium, you know, and uh and some protein.
• 10:13
  SPEAKER_01: And uh so you know it's like uh oh and recently I also added uh creatine.
• 10:23
  SPEAKER_01: But that that is not uh I only added it like a month ago.
• 10:29
  SPEAKER_01: That will help uh with uh building your muscles, but uh to get to my uh good DEXA scan, it was protein and it was uh weight lifting, doing the right lifting the right weights, you know, um doing everything.
• 10:53
  SPEAKER_01: Um if you lift the same weights all the time, doing the same exercises all the time, it does not uh build muscles.
• 11:04
  SPEAKER_03: Right.
• 11:04
  SPEAKER_03: You need to change it every once in a while.
• 11:06
  SPEAKER_03: Either have either move to heavier lifting or change the exercise.
• 11:10
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah, that makes sense.
• 11:11
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah, yeah, that makes sense.
• 11:13
  SPEAKER_03: Wow.
• 11:14
  SPEAKER_03: Okay, so well, I mean, I I want to hear so much more about the health part of your journey, but I also would like to talk to you about how you know women in business can collaborate rather than compete.
• 11:28
  SPEAKER_03: So um I still want answers as far as your health journey because I think that women need to hear it.
• 11:34
  SPEAKER_03: I think, especially when it comes to osteoporosis, I'm hoping that, you know, like my daughter's generation will not have to suffer with osteoporosis.
• 11:42
  SPEAKER_03: But I know that my mother is suffering, and uh, many of the women in her generation, right?
• 11:50
  SPEAKER_03: Our generation, I'm not so sure, right?
• 11:52
  SPEAKER_03: Like I don't know, I haven't heard of anybody saying that they have osteoporosis, but I know that it's a concern of many of us, right?
• 12:00
  SPEAKER_03: Because I mean, if our parents have it, if our mothers have it, it's most likely gonna come down to us, right?
• 12:06
  SPEAKER_03: And down the line.
• 12:07
  SPEAKER_03: Now, I know my daughter, she's you know, 25, so she's she does weightlifting, and that's her regular exercise.
• 12:15
  SPEAKER_03: Now, if she continues with that through into her, you know, older adulthood, you know, she may be safe from it.
• 12:22
  SPEAKER_03: I don't know if that's gonna be a savior, but you know, ideally it should be some kind of a protector for her as far as osteoporosis.
• 12:30
  SPEAKER_01: Um, okay.
• 12:32
  SPEAKER_01: I I have an advice uh for that.
• 12:35
  SPEAKER_01: You know, when you are in your 20s or 30s, go and have a DAXA scan.
• 12:40
  SPEAKER_01: Or now they they also use uh blood markers, um, the blood marker of P1NP that measures your osteoblast, and then the CTX that measures your osteoclast.
• 12:57
  SPEAKER_01: So you want to have those two blood marker markers as well as um the DEXA scan, so you know where your base is.
• 13:08
  SPEAKER_01: So that's a body like for your daughter or those people at that age, once you know your base, you can work towards improving it.
• 13:23
  SPEAKER_01: And then when you get to pre-menopause, don't shy away from um hormone replacement, but you have to go to a really good um endocrinologist to uh make sure that they give you the right doses.
• 13:42
  SPEAKER_01: Because in my generation, um I'm in my early 70s, and back then when I was uh having pre-menopause and menopause, that was when the uh women's uh initiative came out that uh taking hormone replacement is bad for your health.
• 14:08
  SPEAKER_01: And that is because they were taking synthetic hormones, right?
• 14:13
  SPEAKER_01: You know, but we're talking now about bio-identical hormones, and once you you um because when a woman goes into menopause, the hormones drop, you know, almost like overnight.
• 14:32
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
• 14:33
  SPEAKER_01: So you want to give your your body the the right hormones so that it stabilizes it.
• 14:43
  SPEAKER_01: Because with without those hormones, your you know, everything goes downhill.
• 14:49
  SPEAKER_01: And and um and at that time, you know, I was told, no, don't don't take hormone replacement.
• 14:58
  SPEAKER_01: My doctor was giving me um uh the hormone patch.
• 15:03
  SPEAKER_01: I wish I had continued taking it.
• 15:06
  SPEAKER_01: I was taking it for a year or two, and then I I heard that no, you should not continue.
• 15:13
  SPEAKER_01: So I stopped it.
• 15:14
  SPEAKER_01: And uh now I regret.
• 15:17
  SPEAKER_01: And and they are saying even after 10 or 20 years of menopause, you can still go back on hormone replacement.
• 15:28
  SPEAKER_01: But I I have worked my my health in such a way that um I'm hormonally balanced.
• 15:39
  SPEAKER_00: I excellent, yeah.
• 15:41
  SPEAKER_01: I don't need um, well, maybe I need it, but uh I don't feel the need to replace my hormones.
• 15:51
  SPEAKER_01: Right.
• 15:52
  SPEAKER_03: Um because I think you've made health, you've made your health a priority, right?
• 15:57
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah, so you're doing what your body needs, right?
• 16:00
  SPEAKER_03: And there's always something, there's always something that we miss for sure, right?
• 16:04
  SPEAKER_03: But I think you know, I think the the the highlight that you're giving us right now is know your body, no, know what you need to do right now to get it to where it needs to be, and then work from there, right?
• 16:17
  SPEAKER_03: And I love your advice, you know, to tell like my daughter's age, you know, before they start having babies and start, you know, find out what your base is in your.
• 16:27
  SPEAKER_03: I think it's a bone density scan, is that right?
• 16:30
  SPEAKER_03: Yes, yeah, so I don't know.
• 16:32
  SPEAKER_03: I mean, they generally don't give bone density scan exams just to just anyone, but I imagine if you go to the doctor and you say, No, I need it because I'm looking out for my future, you know, you might have to advocate a little bit more than just one request, but that your health is your priority, so you need to get that done, I think.
• 16:54
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah, right?
• 16:55
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah, yeah.
• 16:55
  SPEAKER_01: The doctors will not the doctors will not order it until you are 50 or 60 or even beyond that.
• 17:04
  SPEAKER_01: So when you are at that age, 20s or 30s, you have to pay for it yourself, right?
• 17:11
  SPEAKER_01: But it's it's not a lot, I think it's two or three hundred dollars.
• 17:16
  SPEAKER_01: But that's it.
• 17:17
  SPEAKER_03: And it might be worth having$200 today that's gonna help you in 40 years.
• 17:22
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah, like that's nothing, right?
• 17:24
  SPEAKER_03: I mean, I can't speak for everyone, you know, these kids today don't have money like that, right?
• 17:30
  SPEAKER_03: But if they can put how their health in their priorities, then that's something that they can work towards.
• 17:36
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah, I love that.
• 17:37
  SPEAKER_03: I love that.
• 17:38
  SPEAKER_03: Okay, so let's get back to our competition and collaboration.
• 17:44
  SPEAKER_03: So, women, I mean, women, we all know.
• 17:46
  SPEAKER_03: I mean, I know there's lots of incredibly supportive women in my world, I'm sure in your world as well.
• 17:52
  SPEAKER_03: Um but there's also this underlying belief that someone else's success can somehow make our own success a little bit less possible.
• 18:04
  SPEAKER_03: Where do you think that comes from?
• 18:06
  SPEAKER_03: And have you ever caught yourself falling into that mindset?
• 18:14
  SPEAKER_01: No, I I think collaborating is better than competing.
• 18:24
  SPEAKER_01: And um, you know, I can give you two examples.
• 18:28
  SPEAKER_03: Oh, please.
• 18:30
  SPEAKER_01: Like in my in my business, um we collaborate a lot with other women.
• 18:39
  SPEAKER_01: Um we do trainings for for each other.
• 18:46
  SPEAKER_01: And um so we have open doors.
• 18:50
  SPEAKER_01: Whether whether you are whether I'm making money from your team or not, they can come to my training.
• 18:59
  SPEAKER_01: And uh and also I can go to other people's training.
• 19:04
  SPEAKER_01: So we learn from each other, and we tell each other, you know, this is working better than that.
• 19:12
  SPEAKER_01: So, you know, we we learn and we both benefit, and especially like what we're doing right now.
• 19:22
  SPEAKER_01: Um, you know, instead of saying, no, I don't want to be on your podcast because I don't want um to share my thoughts, but for for being here, I can I can bring my audience to your to you, and your audience can hear from me.
• 19:49
  SPEAKER_01: So it's benefiting both of us.
• 19:52
  SPEAKER_00: Absolutely, yeah.
• 19:54
  SPEAKER_01: And also I'm in um Asian professional group, and uh we are creating a really huge event uh in a couple of months, and you know I am the program director, but we have um you know, a group of us, a few women, we bring in, each of us bring in our expertise, and we you know, we are actually making the group more dynamic because each has our own expect expertise to give, and together we are better, right?
• 20:44
  SPEAKER_03: I love that, I love that, and and the thing is sometimes when you get involved in a group like that, you don't necessarily know what everyone is bringing, right?
• 20:54
  SPEAKER_03: You don't you just know that we are women in business, and then all of a sudden you've got this, you know, golden platform, right?
• 21:04
  SPEAKER_03: Like you've got this this I don't know what you want, a program or whatever it is you want to you're creating, and it's like you feel like you can feel it in your bones, how amazing it is, and you want to share it with everyone.
• 21:17
  SPEAKER_03: So is this event going to be an online event or is it going to be in person?
• 21:22
  SPEAKER_03: It's going to be in person in Naples, Florida.
• 21:26
  SPEAKER_03: Right on in well, okay, so that's far for me, right?
• 21:30
  SPEAKER_03: That is a far trip for me.
• 21:32
  SPEAKER_03: But I mean, obviously, if there's anyone in the area that would like to join um an event like this, please contact Ching because it sounds like it's gonna be great, right?
• 21:43
  SPEAKER_03: And is it for now?
• 21:44
  SPEAKER_03: You said it's an Asian program.
• 21:46
  SPEAKER_03: Is it for Asian women only or is it for women only?
• 21:51
  SPEAKER_01: It's for actually it's for everybody.
• 21:53
  SPEAKER_01: Oh, um yeah.
• 21:56
  SPEAKER_01: Uh but mostly women and um We uh is it's a huge event.
• 22:04
  SPEAKER_01: We are going to have dignitaries and we have um you know uh a lot of powerful people in the room, and uh we're gonna have a fashion show and uh good food and you know come for a vacation, Tina.
• 22:24
  SPEAKER_01: Awesome, yeah.
• 22:25
  SPEAKER_03: Well, you never know two months, two months, you never know, right?
• 22:29
  SPEAKER_03: I'll be needing some heat by then because it'll be cold here in Edmonton.
• 22:32
  SPEAKER_03: Yes, all right.
• 22:34
  SPEAKER_03: There's something vulnerable about sharing what we know, and we all know this, right?
• 22:38
  SPEAKER_03: I mean, some like you said earlier, like sometimes you don't want to share the things that you know, right?
• 22:43
  SPEAKER_03: And so, especially when we've worked really hard to learn something, sometimes we don't want to share that, right?
• 22:50
  SPEAKER_03: Because it's it's it's hard to go through something and then learn from it.
• 22:54
  SPEAKER_03: Now, we can think, you know, why would I give someone else the shortcut when I had to figure it out the hard way, right?
• 23:03
  SPEAKER_03: What have you learned about generosity with your knowledge?
• 23:06
  SPEAKER_03: And has there ever been a time when sharing that knowledge you knew to come back to you in an unexpected way?
• 23:22
  SPEAKER_01: Well, I don't know if it has come back to me except the the satisfaction of sharing it.
• 23:33
  SPEAKER_01: Um that you know you you might have helped somebody.
• 23:39
  SPEAKER_01: Um I have to think hard about that, right?
• 23:45
  SPEAKER_03: Okay, well, let me ask you this have you ever hesitated maybe to share something that you've learned because you wondered whether someone might take your idea or somehow maybe even get ahead of you?
• 23:59
  SPEAKER_01: Um no, but I have learned the hard way.
• 24:03
  SPEAKER_01: Um, when I was working in corporation, you know, now I'm I have a completely um different view of sharing things.
• 24:15
  SPEAKER_01: Well, actually, basically it's the same.
• 24:18
  SPEAKER_01: So when I was in corporate, I taught all my employees everything I knew, and then one of them turned turned against me, and that with her or him, it's uh she and yeah, and uh she kind of um promoted herself to our general manager, and she got my position, ooh, yeah.
• 24:55
  SPEAKER_01: So and after that, I thought, why did I teach her everything that I know?
• 25:02
  SPEAKER_01: And so I was a lot, I was guarded for a long time, and and then fortunately, I I joined Arbon, my the company I'm with now, uh, as an independent consultant.
• 25:20
  SPEAKER_01: And uh I learned that you know um sharing information is empowering everybody.
• 25:30
  SPEAKER_01: It's you know, it's not um it's not going to harm you because when the company grows, we all grow.
• 25:44
  SPEAKER_01: So so um I am eager to share, you know, all my knowledge, even though you know, some some of the knowledge that I gained, I paid a lot of money for it.
• 25:57
  SPEAKER_01: Right.
• 25:58
  SPEAKER_01: But but I'm willing to share.
• 26:00
  SPEAKER_01: Whoever wants to learn, you know, I I'm happy to share.
• 26:06
  SPEAKER_03: I love that.
• 26:06
  SPEAKER_03: I love that.
• 26:07
  SPEAKER_03: I feel the same way.
• 26:08
  SPEAKER_03: Like I'm sure I might spend all the money to go to the school and to learn what I have to learn, but I want to share it with people because I think that there's something you're you're not you can't learn everything from me, right?
• 26:20
  SPEAKER_03: Just like when I go to school, I can't learn everything that they're teaching me, right?
• 26:25
  SPEAKER_03: It's like the brain can only absorb so much, right?
• 26:29
  SPEAKER_03: So if I'm teaching you something or if you're learning something from me, that is actually a good thing on me because I'm able to teach you and share that with you, right?
• 26:39
  SPEAKER_03: You can't take everything from me.
• 26:40
  SPEAKER_03: And if you're gonna do something with what I've taught you, good.
• 26:44
  SPEAKER_03: I think that's awesome, right?
• 26:46
  SPEAKER_03: Like, yes, please, you know, grow your world, grow your environment based on, you know, it's not my one little thing that I'm teaching you that's gonna make you grow, right?
• 26:55
  SPEAKER_03: You can grow with what you know, yeah.
• 26:58
  SPEAKER_01: And also by teaching, you are learning yourself, you are um um making it more solid for yourself, and also um, even though you have learned everything from me, our personality is different.
• 27:20
  SPEAKER_01: So some people might be attracted by you, some people might be attracted by me.
• 27:26
  SPEAKER_01: So, you know, the dynamic is different, so we are not competing, we are you know, yeah, yeah, we're just sharing in the experience, right?
• 27:37
  SPEAKER_03: So, and like you just said, I mean, it's also about relationship, right?
• 27:42
  SPEAKER_03: And you and I have a relationship, we're not deafness necessarily the same people, right?
• 27:48
  SPEAKER_03: But that's how we bond, that's how we share, is through a relationship, you know.
• 27:55
  SPEAKER_03: And and I mean, the reality is not all relationships are easy, right?
• 28:01
  SPEAKER_03: I mean, I know that, I'm sure you know that.
• 28:04
  SPEAKER_03: I would like you to tell me about a time maybe um when you know, a partnership or a collaboration or a relationship didn't quite go the way that you had hoped it would.
• 28:15
  SPEAKER_03: And I'd like to know like what that experience sort of taught you about trusting and communicating and boundaries and sort of when you knew it was time to walk away from that relationship.
• 28:35
  SPEAKER_01: Um I don't know if I have that experience.
• 28:49
  SPEAKER_01: You know, I have had really I'm really fortunate.
• 28:55
  SPEAKER_03: No, that's really good.
• 28:56
  SPEAKER_03: I'm I kind of can sort of relate a little bit.
• 28:59
  SPEAKER_03: I there's not really any relationship that I would like, I think I'm done with this, right?
• 29:04
  SPEAKER_03: At least none that I can remember off the top of my head, like yourself.
• 29:07
  SPEAKER_03: So let me ask you this thing.
• 29:09
  SPEAKER_03: What do you think makes um a collaboration truly healthy?
• 29:20
  SPEAKER_01: Willingness to to help each other, the the true um giving of yourself, and um not not thinking what do I get out of it?
• 29:44
  SPEAKER_01: Right, I love that, right?
• 29:47
  SPEAKER_03: Because I'm here because I want to be here with you, not because you're gonna give me something.
• 29:52
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah, I love that.
• 29:53
  SPEAKER_03: So let me so tell me this then, Ching.
• 29:56
  SPEAKER_03: How do you protect your own goals and values while still making room for someone or everyone else in the room?
• 30:05
  SPEAKER_01: You can't make room for everyone else.
• 30:08
  SPEAKER_01: So so you just have to um evaluate what is going to be positive for you, and um what is wasting your time, yeah, yeah.
• 30:31
  SPEAKER_01: So, you know, um I'm giving uh a big chunk of my time to this uh Asian professional group, and um and I'm getting a lot of pleasure out of it because you know I gain friendships, I gain um I learn from these other powerful women.
• 30:55
  SPEAKER_01: Um and I I also get their meet, I get to meet their contacts.
• 31:04
  SPEAKER_01: So it's widening my my circle of influence.
• 31:10
  SPEAKER_01: Um but it it takes a lot of my time, and uh so I have to really sometimes tell myself, you know, you have you need to work your business, you cannot just do this for pleasure, right?
• 31:27
  SPEAKER_03: But but like you said, it your circle is getting bigger, and so that will eventually it will also grow your business.
• 31:34
  SPEAKER_03: I I wonder, um, what would you love to see women doing more of for one another?
• 31:44
  SPEAKER_01: Just be just be friends, be a good friend, um, and also it's not just um business, it's also to uh know when someone needs your help.
• 32:10
  SPEAKER_01: And um yeah, be a be a good friend, be open to or be sensitive enough to know when they they feel down that they need you and uh you know uh yeah, just to it's it's not only um business, you you just need to be a good human being, right?
• 32:45
  SPEAKER_03: I agree, I believe that 100%.
• 32:48
  SPEAKER_03: What is one small way a woman listening today could begin creating more collaboration in her own life or in her business?
• 32:58
  SPEAKER_01: Talk to more people, yeah.
• 33:02
  SPEAKER_01: So you you learn a lot by talking to people, yeah, yeah, yeah.
• 33:09
  SPEAKER_01: I'm always curious, you know.
• 33:11
  SPEAKER_01: I I'm the person who asks lots of questions, and uh and and sometimes people think that you you are interesting, but you are actually interested, right?
• 33:24
  SPEAKER_03: Right, yeah, and and they say that in networking, don't they?
• 33:28
  SPEAKER_03: Be interesting, but be more interested.
• 33:31
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah, yeah, yeah.
• 33:33
  SPEAKER_03: What would you say to the woman who has been trying to do everything alone?
• 33:39
  SPEAKER_03: Oh, that is sad.
• 33:44
  SPEAKER_03: Stop it.
• 33:45
  SPEAKER_03: That's my answer.
• 33:46
  SPEAKER_03: Stop it.
• 33:48
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah, stop it.
• 33:50
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah, you can't do you're not superwoman, you know, especially for women.
• 33:55
  SPEAKER_01: We need we need connection, we need we need um communication.
• 34:04
  SPEAKER_01: And you know, sometimes we we don't get it from our spouses.
• 34:10
  SPEAKER_01: Uh, you know, so you need you need communication with others, especially with other women.
• 34:19
  SPEAKER_01: And uh don't don't uh have have keep the problem to yourself, you know, talk to talk about it.
• 34:31
  SPEAKER_01: That will lighten your load, and also you you can hear suggestions from others.
• 34:40
  SPEAKER_01: Like, you know, a lot of women when they find out that they have cancer or or other illnesses, they don't want to tell anybody.
• 34:51
  SPEAKER_01: I mean, it's it's a disease, it's not a shameful thing.
• 34:58
  SPEAKER_01: I don't understand why they don't talk about it because once you talk about it, you get ideas from all over.
• 35:06
  SPEAKER_01: And then you have to pick and choose what is you know actually going to help you.
• 35:13
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah, yeah.
• 35:14
  SPEAKER_03: And then the thing is, the doctors, yes, they can offer you support medically, but can they offer you the support that you need outside of the medical, right?
• 35:24
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah, sometimes it's not that we need to do the research on this is what my body needs, this is what I need to do as far as you know, nutrition.
• 35:31
  SPEAKER_03: Sometimes you just need someone to listen, right?
• 35:34
  SPEAKER_03: Or you know, give you a you know, some kind of a guideline, you know, start with this, start with that, right?
• 35:41
  SPEAKER_03: And and there are lots of support groups for sure, right?
• 35:44
  SPEAKER_01: But yeah, and also, and also, you know, um, somebody might have heard of an alternative way to heal yourself, and then somebody else knows of a uh place where you can go to to um you know do it um holistically, and somebody else can tell you, oh um, you know, this doctor is is really good or that surgeon is good.
• 36:17
  SPEAKER_01: You know, you you get the ideas.
• 36:20
  SPEAKER_01: Like when when I had to have cataract surgery, I didn't know which doctor to to go to.
• 36:29
  SPEAKER_01: So I I talked to my neighbors, and one neighbor it referred me to another neighbor who has gone through it, and so I I got the best doctor for for my it.
• 36:42
  SPEAKER_01: I mean, cataract surgery is very simple, it's they do it hundreds of times, it's your eyes, right?
• 36:51
  SPEAKER_03: But it's your eyes, you need your eyes, yeah, you have to have confidence in whoever's gonna be working on your eyes for sure.
• 36:58
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah, yeah.
• 37:01
  SPEAKER_03: See, that's and that's what collaboration is all about, right?
• 37:04
  SPEAKER_03: You might not be able to help me, but you might know somebody who can help me.
• 37:09
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah, true, yeah, yeah.
• 37:11
  SPEAKER_03: This has been so awesome.
• 37:13
  SPEAKER_03: Thank you so much, Ching.
• 37:15
  SPEAKER_03: I would love to connect with you again and talk more about your osteoporosis journey.
• 37:21
  SPEAKER_03: You know, I think that that's something that we can share with others, you know, like you know, your journey is, you know, different from every other.
• 37:29
  SPEAKER_03: I mean, we all have our own journey, but it's good if we could compare your journey or not even compare, just at least take knowledge from your journey and share it with women who might be, you know, struggling with the same symptoms and the same, you know, issues.
• 37:47
  SPEAKER_03: So maybe in the future we will get together again and we'll talk about that.
• 37:52
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah, yeah.
• 37:53
  SPEAKER_01: The thing is, osteoporosis, there's no symptom.
• 37:56
  SPEAKER_03: Oh, even better.
• 37:57
  SPEAKER_03: Great, great, even worse.
• 38:01
  SPEAKER_03: Even worse, yeah, exactly.
• 38:02
  SPEAKER_03: There was sarcasm in my voice for sure.
• 38:04
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah, so yeah, see, that's that's a struggle.
• 38:07
  SPEAKER_03: Like, I didn't even know that.
• 38:08
  SPEAKER_03: My mom is struggling with osteoporosis to this day, and it's been tough for her the last 10 to 15 years, right?
• 38:15
  SPEAKER_03: And and so that's I guess that's what happens.
• 38:18
  SPEAKER_03: Your symptoms don't appear until the pain appears.
• 38:22
  SPEAKER_03: Uh-huh.
• 38:22
  SPEAKER_03: Well, ask her to call me.
• 38:25
  SPEAKER_01: Sure, I will do that.
• 38:27
  SPEAKER_01: All the three of us can talk, you know, about it.
• 38:31
  SPEAKER_01: Awesome.
• 38:31
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah, awesome.
• 38:32
  SPEAKER_03: Well, thank you so much.
• 38:34
  SPEAKER_03: Thanks very much, Tina.
• 38:36
  SPEAKER_03: It's a really great pleasure to be on your podcast.
• 38:39
  SPEAKER_03: Awesome.
• 38:40
  SPEAKER_03: Thank you so much for that.
• 38:42
  SPEAKER_03: There are so many things I'm taking away from this conversation, but I think the biggest one is another woman's success does not diminish ours.
• 38:52
  SPEAKER_03: There is room for all of us.
• 38:54
  SPEAKER_03: Room to learn from one another, room to share what we know, room to open doors for each other, room to celebrate another woman's win without wondering what it means about our own.
• 39:05
  SPEAKER_03: And maybe collaboration starts with something very simple: being willing to reach out and say, I could use some help, or I think I can help you, or simply tell me what you've learned.
• 39:17
  SPEAKER_03: Ching, thank you for reminding us that we really can go further when we stop trying to do everything alone.
• 39:23
  SPEAKER_03: If you'd like to connect with Ching and learn more about her work, you can find her information in the show notes.
• 39:29
  SPEAKER_03: And if something in this conversation was has you thinking about your own next chapter, maybe you're ready for a change, you have something you want to pursue, or you simply know what you don't want to keep doing things the same.
• 39:43
  SPEAKER_03: I'd love to connect with you through my coaching.
• 39:46
  SPEAKER_03: And of course, if you're looking for more conversations like this, I invite you to stay connected with Confidence and Bloom.
• 39:52
  SPEAKER_03: This is a space for women who are figuring things out, growing, stretching, and becoming more confident in who they are and where they're going.
• 40:00
  SPEAKER_03: Because we don't have to climb the mountain alone.
• 40:03
  SPEAKER_03: Sometimes the woman beside us has the map, and sometimes we're the one carrying the map for someone else.
• 40:09
  SPEAKER_03: Until next time, keep blooming.
• 40:12
  SPEAKER_02: Thanks for listening.
• 40:13
  SPEAKER_02: This show was brought to you by Divas That Care.
• 40:16
  SPEAKER_02: Connect with us on Facebook, on Instagram, and of course on divas that care.com, where you can subscribe to our newsletter so you don't miss a thing.