Latest / BLACK HOT FIRE NETWORK SHOW'S / THE TUBONGE SHOW-DIFFERENCE BETWEEN FUNCTIONAL AND A DYSFUNCTIONAL FAMILY

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THE TUBONGE SHOW-DIFFERENCE BETWEEN FUNCTIONAL AND A DYSFUNCTIONAL FAMILY · BLACK HOT FIRE NETWORK SHOW'S

• 0:00
  Speaker 1: I just want to.
• 0:03
  Speaker 2: Celebration lacking you.
• 0:05
  Speaker 3: Think about all the wages said and your chillion cheers
• 0:11
  Speaker 3: the Black Hawk Fire Radio.
• 0:13
  Speaker 2: And you're listening chick.
• 0:23
  Speaker 4: Crazy, you arazy and get anyway.
• 0:41
  Speaker 5: You don't move anywhere, and when we do, you know,
• 0:55
  Speaker 5: we y and everything you say and no day inside.
• 1:05
  Speaker 3: Reachings and saltations Max and decant the Robinson all the
• 1:09
  Speaker 3: way in switch the lad and you're choosing in to
• 1:13
  Speaker 3: the Black House Fire Radio and you're listening to After
• 1:17
  Speaker 3: the Doctor.
• 2:00
  Speaker 5: You're gonna make your mother's slasher because I mean a
• 2:04
  Speaker 5: man's show.
• 2:08
  Speaker 2: Maybe you know he kill me.
• 2:11
  Speaker 4: Thank you pretty baby like he's something.
• 2:14
  Speaker 2: Prep but thanks JR. Preshu. Thanks not pressure what people?
• 2:58
  Speaker 2: What do you mean from what you're like?
• 3:00
  Speaker 6: Family's first four pm Welcome to to Bog show.
• 3:18
  Speaker 7: Sometime extra pressure that when you want.
• 3:25
  Speaker 2: Of course.
• 3:37
  Speaker 3: You tell you all the way into line and you're
• 3:43
  Speaker 3: chilling it to the Black Half Fire Radio and you're
• 3:48
  Speaker 3: listening to.
• 3:52
  Speaker 6: Yes have you been another beautiful episode of the two
• 3:55
  Speaker 6: Bog Show. Of course only media of the twenty per century.
• 3:59
  Speaker 6: This is the black financial radio station and the Captain of.
• 4:02
  Speaker 2: The day, j B Y you can call me. That's
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  Speaker 2: that's how they call me.
• 4:05
  Speaker 8: And of course carriedbon.
• 4:08
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  Speaker 6: interact with That's that's what our live that's on YouTube,
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  Speaker 6: I hope you guys get to enter the show on
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  Speaker 6: form of our podcast and hell to everyone live with
• 4:25
  Speaker 6: us on the radio station.
• 4:26
  Speaker 2: Oh, on the TV and on the website.
• 4:30
  Speaker 6: You don't go TV here international baby because anyway, carry Bonny.
• 4:34
  Speaker 2: So now you guys doing I'm good, Carbony, that's what's up.
• 4:40
  Speaker 7: I'm great.
• 4:41
  Speaker 2: Are you feeling fortunately excited for the show?
• 4:49
  Speaker 9: Of course to buy read.
• 4:53
  Speaker 6: Today starting with that very high You don't want to
• 4:55
  Speaker 6: be around people who have low energy. That's come on,
• 4:59
  Speaker 6: that's what's up. Every day I told you she want
• 5:05
  Speaker 6: to say days country. Remember days more then you want man?
• 5:12
  Speaker 2: Yeah? Really nice man? Day was not ye you don't
• 5:16
  Speaker 2: listen to be nice guy. No, days don't love vibration. Yeah,
• 5:23
  Speaker 2: it's not really no vibration. I'm trying to look vibration
• 5:26
  Speaker 2: all they're just going through something.
• 5:28
  Speaker 7: Really.
• 5:30
  Speaker 10: It's like right now your energy is amazing, it's great,
• 5:35
  Speaker 10: but there's some people you're just in a space is
• 5:37
  Speaker 10: super like low even they're trying to hide them. It's
• 5:41
  Speaker 10: just so heavy and it's basically inspirable. Even though you're
• 5:45
  Speaker 10: trying to excite it, you can't.
• 5:47
  Speaker 2: You end up being low. Yeah, I get that completely, say.
• 5:51
  Speaker 6: That, like that's very true, right because we're not okay, Yeah, like's.
• 5:59
  Speaker 2: Just gonna be shocked some type of with the same
• 6:05
  Speaker 2: so you act you know, yeah, but low vibrations.
• 6:10
  Speaker 7: Energy to the money, listen to the mom doing good.
• 6:18
  Speaker 1: I can't complain high energy. He's like, is he trying
• 6:21
  Speaker 1: to be loyal to tell you low vibration not?
• 6:27
  Speaker 7: Has a mother baa ask.
• 6:35
  Speaker 8: You, I'm doing great.
• 6:36
  Speaker 2: Need to see you guys, go to see you too
• 6:39
  Speaker 2: so much.
• 6:39
  Speaker 8: You'll look great. You're trying to thank you.
• 6:42
  Speaker 2: So I'm trying continue living job mother right now, so
• 6:48
  Speaker 2: you're not allowed.
• 6:49
  Speaker 1: To be, you know, like you by I've been a mother,
• 6:55
  Speaker 1: my mother, I'm pregnant who still being a mother?
• 7:00
  Speaker 9: Yeah, which is true to so many people.
• 7:02
  Speaker 1: Okay, myself, I thought you're pregnant, Like congratulations, what do
• 7:08
  Speaker 1: you mean now enjoy.
• 7:10
  Speaker 8: Your sexy with a baby.
• 7:15
  Speaker 7: Yeah, okay, I'm numbers.
• 7:26
  Speaker 6: I don't know if you've seen them. God number, I
• 7:29
  Speaker 6: know understanding. I don't know what numbers.
• 7:32
  Speaker 2: God isn't call Yeah.
• 7:36
  Speaker 8: Well it's you communicated through numbers. It's called yeah.
• 7:41
  Speaker 2: Seven for ninety eight.
• 7:44
  Speaker 8: That means high vibration always.
• 7:51
  Speaker 1: Seven, forty nine, eight, seventy three okay, okay, fourteen, fourteen nice.
• 7:58
  Speaker 2: Nine nine all right.
• 8:03
  Speaker 8: Respond Oh.
• 8:09
  Speaker 2: That cading. But we're not understanding what you're saying.
• 8:13
  Speaker 8: What do you mean they just said that studio you say.
• 8:18
  Speaker 2: Increase your energy. Hey, I understand that from a very
• 8:25
  Speaker 2: hot talk. I know, big Ruth.
• 8:27
  Speaker 6: They're speaking healthy you sad cam Iland, save kid like amazing.
• 8:35
  Speaker 6: Really a lot of doctor papers dies you was drinking
• 8:40
  Speaker 6: a lot of solders.
• 8:41
  Speaker 2: Okay, yeah, I think you have to talk about that.
• 8:43
  Speaker 10: Oyeah, yeah, like I would brand me something like that, right,
• 8:47
  Speaker 10: died for a doctor who talks about like, oh but
• 8:51
  Speaker 10: there's a.
• 8:55
  Speaker 6: Yeah yeah, okay called doctor people. Okay, yeah, kids love
• 8:59
  Speaker 6: that a lot. But now water that's nice tries.
• 9:02
  Speaker 9: Yeah, and I know.
• 9:05
  Speaker 2: Business yeah yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, I do.
• 9:11
  Speaker 1: Like I don't like, man, I've never eaten that thing.
• 9:15
  Speaker 8: I've never even never had a taste. I think I
• 9:18
  Speaker 8: don't you know, I like, I've never tried.
• 9:21
  Speaker 6: Like you know, if you don't pay attention, your problem
• 9:24
  Speaker 6: is you don't if you don't pay attention.
• 9:27
  Speaker 2: To colors day, it's my street, Yeah, sweet street.
• 9:40
  Speaker 9: It's nice a.
• 9:43
  Speaker 6: Lot when I was in high school to myself and
• 9:45
  Speaker 6: the corner. I need to eat a lot because maybe
• 9:49
  Speaker 6: one to three things.
• 9:53
  Speaker 2: It's like yellow one you say that I've never seen.
• 9:58
  Speaker 2: I'm not saying that yellow one. I think probably maybe
• 10:01
  Speaker 2: the red one. Something that came you look at my
• 10:03
  Speaker 2: hand like the paper key.
• 10:08
  Speaker 10: Yeah.
• 10:09
  Speaker 6: But anyway, carryboy Samma to everyone who's just on YouTube
• 10:12
  Speaker 6: us know how your day is going and how you
• 10:15
  Speaker 6: work so far? Is the amount of August actually is
• 10:17
  Speaker 6: coming to an end?
• 10:18
  Speaker 7: You guys man September.
• 10:21
  Speaker 2: We should just care for your til next week. That day, man,
• 10:27
  Speaker 2: I knew that.
• 10:28
  Speaker 1: On my.
• 10:30
  Speaker 6: That Urgo season, I read I read something wos come
• 10:33
  Speaker 6: like they belongs to.
• 10:37
  Speaker 1: You?
• 10:37
  Speaker 2: Know what's that you work and everyone you you are.
• 10:42
  Speaker 11: October yes, okay, very balanced date October Okay, Okay, we
• 10:51
  Speaker 11: see you got numbers.
• 10:53
  Speaker 6: Literally okay, everybody whose lives some TikTok once again on
• 10:57
  Speaker 6: YouTube or the radio station, on Spreaker, on Spotify, on
• 11:02
  Speaker 6: our TV on our website Tokla Malica Martins, I know,
• 11:05
  Speaker 6: man and today's composition, you shall be talking about the
• 11:08
  Speaker 6: difference between the functional family and the dysfunctional family, and
• 11:13
  Speaker 6: don't understand.
• 11:14
  Speaker 2: The difference between the two.
• 11:15
  Speaker 6: But before you get to the google and all that time,
• 11:18
  Speaker 6: I hear, of course from both of you, before you
• 11:20
  Speaker 6: get to give my own side, because I went to
• 11:22
  Speaker 6: all grown up with different different experiences which maybe for
• 11:25
  Speaker 6: other people, for you, that was a functional family or
• 11:28
  Speaker 6: any is functional family that people are gonna look at
• 11:31
  Speaker 6: the way you guys run things that are like set
• 11:33
  Speaker 6: for you.
• 11:34
  Speaker 2: And also we used to go to other people's friends friends,
• 11:36
  Speaker 2: used to see them do something they're like you know,
• 11:40
  Speaker 2: I know.
• 11:40
  Speaker 6: So what is your definition of a functional family and
• 11:45
  Speaker 6: or dysfunctional family?
• 11:46
  Speaker 2: Both of them?
• 11:47
  Speaker 9: For functional family is the one that is both parents. Okay, yeah,
• 11:52
  Speaker 9: that's all right.
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  Speaker 2: Because the kid gets for experience.
• 11:57
  Speaker 10: How if it's a man, basically help your man the
• 12:00
  Speaker 10: dad and also understanding women having.
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  Speaker 2: A relationship with the mother.
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  Speaker 10: Yeah, so if one is not there either of the parents,
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  Speaker 10: that can get a little bit.
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  Speaker 9: It's difficult. And also that if the family has a.
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  Speaker 10: Son and they don't have any man to look up
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  Speaker 10: to as a father figure. It can be really it's
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  Speaker 10: gonna affect how they're gonna turn out in their teenager
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  Speaker 10: also when they're growing up, growing up into being a man,
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  Speaker 10: also as a lady.
• 12:29
  Speaker 9: If you don't have a father figure, it's going to
• 12:31
  Speaker 9: affect how you you men have relations with memory you
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  Speaker 9: grow up. So functional family basically.
• 12:38
  Speaker 2: For me has a mother and father.
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  Speaker 9: That's a functional family for me.
• 12:42
  Speaker 2: Dysfunctional without just without okay o past is.
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  Speaker 1: Presence of both might not be raised like you know,
• 12:57
  Speaker 1: because some relationship don't work, you know, but if the
• 13:01
  Speaker 1: father is a present father since the daughter. You know,
• 13:04
  Speaker 1: there's a lot of broken marriages out here, but it
• 13:07
  Speaker 1: doesn't mean that if you are a broken marriage, you
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  Speaker 1: stay out.
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  Speaker 8: Of your kid's life. You have to be a present
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  Speaker 8: keep up a present family.
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  Speaker 1: I've seen people call parenting really really well and it's
• 13:18
  Speaker 1: still wild. So definitely for me, it's not even growing
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  Speaker 1: up for me is like the presence of both parents
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  Speaker 1: in your life and very functional, like you know, their roles,
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  Speaker 1: very straighten up. They bring you together regardless of you know,
• 13:33
  Speaker 1: whatever they are going to do. So yeah, that is
• 13:35
  Speaker 1: my thought or my description about functional familiar.
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  Speaker 2: Before you continue.
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  Speaker 10: Also can be also the fact that you have both
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  Speaker 10: parents abuse and also maybe the way the parents are
• 13:50
  Speaker 10: treating you, it's not the way a kids should be treated.
• 13:54
  Speaker 10: Maybe the old basically the drages or then are present
• 13:59
  Speaker 10: most times, even the.
• 14:01
  Speaker 2: Way they raise you, it's not the way. I agree. Yeah,
• 14:06
  Speaker 2: for me, I do take both of both of you,
• 14:08
  Speaker 2: I grew both of you.
• 14:12
  Speaker 6: Explanation and go with you as first personally both of you,
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  Speaker 6: I don't believe a functional family are.
• 14:19
  Speaker 2: Of course there is the mother figure, the father figure.
• 14:22
  Speaker 6: Both of them are very active and like you added,
• 14:25
  Speaker 6: they must be playing not just even the abuse, but
• 14:27
  Speaker 6: you have to be playing the role of you as
• 14:30
  Speaker 6: a dad because.
• 14:31
  Speaker 2: We might have Yes, they're there, but you're not playing
• 14:34
  Speaker 2: the role over mother.
• 14:35
  Speaker 6: You're either a drunk you ate abuse it to the
• 14:38
  Speaker 6: children like you said, and you also have to be
• 14:41
  Speaker 6: a mother.
• 14:41
  Speaker 2: You know, are both parents playing the role that they're
• 14:44
  Speaker 2: supposed to be to.
• 14:46
  Speaker 6: Make this family a functional family, and they're both the
• 14:49
  Speaker 6: role you both play in parts of course this children
• 14:52
  Speaker 6: this child or children's life, which also for them gives
• 14:56
  Speaker 6: them the room to either act as children because let's
• 14:59
  Speaker 6: just be honest, we are we are families?
• 15:02
  Speaker 2: What's like, is this a child? Why are you behaving
• 15:07
  Speaker 2: like this?
• 15:08
  Speaker 1: No?
• 15:08
  Speaker 7: In an African home.
• 15:09
  Speaker 6: We're gonna guess marked, you know, and as we go
• 15:11
  Speaker 6: we're gonna of course discuss some of the things, of course,
• 15:14
  Speaker 6: due to what has driven this conversation, some of the
• 15:17
  Speaker 6: things you've seen children.
• 15:18
  Speaker 2: Doing, not doing and all that.
• 15:20
  Speaker 6: So, yes, the presence of a mother a father has
• 15:23
  Speaker 6: to be there, but they have to be both playing
• 15:25
  Speaker 6: their roles an instructional family, like you said, Ella rmalization
• 15:29
  Speaker 6: of divorce, which is becoming a normal now, you know,
• 15:33
  Speaker 6: people think like it's supposed to be a noun, but
• 15:35
  Speaker 6: it's normal again where our child.
• 15:37
  Speaker 2: Grows differences, of course, it's just separate, I'm to.
• 15:44
  Speaker 6: So it brings a lot of confusion to the child
• 15:48
  Speaker 6: as they grow up, and that becomes a dysfunctional family
• 15:52
  Speaker 6: even from the child really because the fact that while
• 15:55
  Speaker 6: both parents cannot even talk any good things about each
• 16:00
  Speaker 6: that it's all about.
• 16:01
  Speaker 2: Criticisms or negativity.
• 16:02
  Speaker 1: Then that is already gone gone, but dysfunctional family also
• 16:08
  Speaker 1: as you get to add on that, I just remember
• 16:10
  Speaker 1: probably by not even being there might be Yes, it
• 16:13
  Speaker 1: is the presence of both parents but they're also they
• 16:17
  Speaker 1: are bringing and how the family functional. This can be
• 16:19
  Speaker 1: from even siblings. You know, if you have like this
• 16:24
  Speaker 1: type of siblings and that pushing you but also be dysfunctional.
• 16:27
  Speaker 1: I don't really think it only comes from the parents
• 16:31
  Speaker 1: alone pushing. I mean, if you have like you know,
• 16:37
  Speaker 1: what I'm going to say is it's not only the parents.
• 16:40
  Speaker 1: For me, how I view it might be everybody involved
• 16:42
  Speaker 1: around you with their whole family. How is your relationship
• 16:46
  Speaker 1: with your sisters, siblings, and then people exactly extended, how
• 16:52
  Speaker 1: they people who want graduates, people who do this, so
• 16:55
  Speaker 1: it's all about their bringing.
• 16:58
  Speaker 2: Their whole family. It's literally it's literally everything.
• 17:01
  Speaker 6: Now you grow not just from the child growing, but
• 17:04
  Speaker 6: even to the continuous of their lives with their siblings
• 17:08
  Speaker 6: and other people around them in terms of relatives. But
• 17:11
  Speaker 6: I going to google there's a functional family, Let's see,
• 17:15
  Speaker 6: is a place where people feel like they can grow
• 17:18
  Speaker 6: together as individuals within the family environment. There is love,
• 17:22
  Speaker 6: there's unity, but also individually among the family members, they
• 17:27
  Speaker 6: likely they like to be there.
• 17:29
  Speaker 2: Let me be that again.
• 17:31
  Speaker 6: Functional family is a place where people feel they can
• 17:34
  Speaker 6: grow together as individuals.
• 17:35
  Speaker 2: Within the family environment. There is love and unity, but
• 17:38
  Speaker 2: also individuality.
• 17:40
  Speaker 6: Among the family members and they like to be there
• 17:43
  Speaker 6: like you yourself, you like I want.
• 17:45
  Speaker 2: To behold and I think I see that a lot
• 17:47
  Speaker 2: of cut and most of the people are seen around
• 17:50
  Speaker 2: like men. I want to go home.
• 17:52
  Speaker 6: It's such a good feeling because now you know the
• 17:54
  Speaker 6: kind of love you grew up with and that you
• 17:57
  Speaker 6: can't wait literally as much as you know it's there
• 17:58
  Speaker 6: yours like you just remember the presence of how you
• 18:05
  Speaker 6: guys grew up there, I was here, what made you
• 18:08
  Speaker 6: to me who you are? And now you reflect to
• 18:10
  Speaker 6: people and also relationships. You say so for me and
• 18:14
  Speaker 6: all ago of course with one with each again, one
• 18:17
  Speaker 6: of you before we go to the description of the
• 18:20
  Speaker 6: dysfunctional family according to Google. Personally, I think I grew
• 18:24
  Speaker 6: up in a dysfunctional family, not a functional one. Yeah,
• 18:28
  Speaker 6: because one, of course, my dad and mom divorced when
• 18:31
  Speaker 6: I was very young, and I was young from the
• 18:33
  Speaker 6: very from nothing that age, really chi, you know, dragon,
• 18:38
  Speaker 6: who's gonna, of course win the case. Who's gonna be
• 18:40
  Speaker 6: with me eventually? My dad one, of course, and.
• 18:45
  Speaker 2: You ended up dumping me.
• 18:46
  Speaker 7: Somewhere else, not him taking care of me.
• 18:49
  Speaker 6: That's the number one you start by talking if it's
• 18:51
  Speaker 6: a functional family. Even if the father is there, is
• 18:54
  Speaker 6: he really playing the role of being a father or
• 18:57
  Speaker 6: is it just a father who father? So for me,
• 19:00
  Speaker 6: number one, that was that is a good example of
• 19:03
  Speaker 6: where I grew up with a very dysfunctional family because
• 19:05
  Speaker 6: the fact that you from the way, from the very tin.
• 19:08
  Speaker 2: Age of you guys separating, you are to take care
• 19:11
  Speaker 2: of me.
• 19:12
  Speaker 6: You took me to someone else's hands, you know, you
• 19:15
  Speaker 6: didn't literally and I was young, my like far went
• 19:19
  Speaker 6: on acadomy because according to the chief, I.
• 19:21
  Speaker 2: Am under your care, not under anyone's care.
• 19:24
  Speaker 6: So I don't know about you guys. To continue, of course,
• 19:26
  Speaker 6: I'm going to give much more example, but that is
• 19:28
  Speaker 6: number one for me. My father was never there present.
• 19:31
  Speaker 6: I think I've rear in so many stories. You guys
• 19:33
  Speaker 6: really know those who don't. But that was never a
• 19:36
  Speaker 6: functional family for me. I don't know about you. What
• 19:38
  Speaker 6: on have you grown up in a functional family family?
• 19:43
  Speaker 2: No issues?
• 19:43
  Speaker 6: How did you guys used to talk on like family
• 19:46
  Speaker 6: problems like could you sit down now?
• 19:48
  Speaker 1: Yeah?
• 19:49
  Speaker 6: Of course for using let me tell you, for us
• 19:52
  Speaker 6: to see me it's lecture Like my dad would sit
• 19:56
  Speaker 6: us in the dining table, including the why her lecture
• 20:01
  Speaker 6: you know, being too like you know, trying to talk
• 20:03
  Speaker 6: calmly on in it, but it was a lecture.
• 20:05
  Speaker 2: That's the kind of shit I'm music.
• 20:09
  Speaker 10: About it, like basically about it, or if it's something
• 20:13
  Speaker 10: to do with each we'll just sit down and.
• 20:16
  Speaker 2: Talk about it.
• 20:17
  Speaker 6: Did you used to notice maybe when they fight, when
• 20:21
  Speaker 6: they have a quarrel. For me, it was long like
• 20:24
  Speaker 6: see yeah, and that's why I remember if there's more
• 20:27
  Speaker 6: discussing about when people to say, used to see some
• 20:30
  Speaker 6: awkward behaviors maybe one, two, three days legs off for him,
• 20:33
  Speaker 6: he grew up in a functional FAMI and for me,
• 20:35
  Speaker 6: I was like this is this is no you know
• 20:38
  Speaker 6: see like exactly.
• 20:41
  Speaker 2: Literally that was that.
• 20:43
  Speaker 10: But not not that much in regards to like maybe
• 20:46
  Speaker 10: like anybody else, or that my mom or my dad
• 20:50
  Speaker 10: won't tell me anything about the other person, not really
• 20:54
  Speaker 10: because they'll figure it out and then everything is okay, nice,
• 20:58
  Speaker 10: Like some awkward moments you say, okay, what's.
• 21:01
  Speaker 6: Happening your siblings relationship tackling problems? How did you but
• 21:10
  Speaker 6: the end of like talking to each the relationship you
• 21:13
  Speaker 6: had a very small relationship, Yes, because money, I think
• 21:18
  Speaker 6: for you've given so many stories. Have you grown up
• 21:21
  Speaker 6: in a functional family? I have grown up in a
• 21:23
  Speaker 6: functional family.
• 21:24
  Speaker 1: But again, if we say about the presence of both parents,
• 21:28
  Speaker 1: because part of my life, I've grown up with my mom. Yeah,
• 21:32
  Speaker 1: because after my dad passed, Because my dad passed at
• 21:35
  Speaker 1: a younger age, I was like in primary, so my
• 21:38
  Speaker 1: high school, and I'm turning now into a grown woman.
• 21:41
  Speaker 1: I really don't know if that is what we call
• 21:42
  Speaker 1: the dysfunctional family. Really could we could we put it
• 21:46
  Speaker 1: at a dysfunction because.
• 21:47
  Speaker 8: It was a present for that. Yeah, it was a
• 21:49
  Speaker 8: really present for the.
• 21:50
  Speaker 1: Same house, same wife, and stuff like that. I never
• 21:54
  Speaker 1: saw stuff like I've told I never saw stuff like fights.
• 21:57
  Speaker 1: I would even't wonder now when I'm trying to grow up.
• 21:59
  Speaker 1: I was like, man, this is like a really perfect relationship,
• 22:02
  Speaker 1: you know, And then when you grow up you understand
• 22:04
  Speaker 1: even into relationships, you see back and forth, you know,
• 22:07
  Speaker 1: the problems you face with your person, and you're like,
• 22:10
  Speaker 1: come to think about it, probably everybody has their own problems.
• 22:12
  Speaker 8: It's just that they didn't want us to see that side.
• 22:15
  Speaker 1: Because I never actually had a conversation with my mom
• 22:18
  Speaker 1: about Nini Ninni in fact.
• 22:20
  Speaker 8: She was that type of person.
• 22:21
  Speaker 1: If there was a problem, she tell you she'd wait
• 22:23
  Speaker 1: for my pups, like literally, ant like, if you had
• 22:27
  Speaker 1: an issue, you'll tell her. If it is like sickness,
• 22:31
  Speaker 1: she'd like, do want to want to? She waits for
• 22:34
  Speaker 1: your father. And then when my dad, perhaps my my pups,
• 22:37
  Speaker 1: suppose she'd be like, I could come and tell that
• 22:39
  Speaker 1: this is something that you know. So I saw that
• 22:42
  Speaker 1: kind of you know, further matter type of relationship, the
• 22:46
  Speaker 1: respect between each other and that, and of course everyone
• 22:50
  Speaker 1: with my siblings, I just want to say, it's like
• 22:52
  Speaker 1: when you grow up.
• 22:54
  Speaker 8: One thing I've noticed in every family, you tend to
• 22:57
  Speaker 8: be different.
• 22:58
  Speaker 1: You know, when you're yeah, just like kids, and then
• 23:01
  Speaker 1: when you pop to now be bigger people, you have
• 23:04
  Speaker 1: like different personalities, different paths. Everybody's just different. Because if
• 23:08
  Speaker 1: I look at my family, me and my brother, we
• 23:11
  Speaker 1: are like almost the same. I'm like, this guy is
• 23:13
  Speaker 1: like a male version of me.
• 23:15
  Speaker 8: The things I wouldn't be surprised if it does, be
• 23:17
  Speaker 8: like I do the same. I've done the same, you know.
• 23:20
  Speaker 1: And my sisters tend to be different. The elder one
• 23:23
  Speaker 1: is probably because of the age difference. You have like
• 23:25
  Speaker 1: ten years gap firstborn me and there only seven years
• 23:30
  Speaker 1: the last three we are like really like it's one
• 23:33
  Speaker 1: year two years different. So we're like age you see.
• 23:36
  Speaker 1: So there's a difference between also the age set, so
• 23:40
  Speaker 1: we don't get along in a lot of conversation. But
• 23:42
  Speaker 1: that is only after we've grown up and everybody has
• 23:45
  Speaker 1: chosen their own part. But if it tends to be
• 23:49
  Speaker 1: like this is something I've seen, if it tends to
• 23:51
  Speaker 1: be something that needs the whole family, I've seen everybody
• 23:53
  Speaker 1: coming together despite the differences.
• 23:56
  Speaker 8: They're like, you know, we gotta do this. You know,
• 23:58
  Speaker 8: we gotta do this.
• 23:59
  Speaker 1: And so that that has been the relationship. Of course
• 24:03
  Speaker 1: there's been back and forth. I have been having issues
• 24:06
  Speaker 1: and I think I've said this for a long time.
• 24:08
  Speaker 1: As we grow up with my elder ones, my elder siblings,
• 24:12
  Speaker 1: like sometimes you don't communicate as much, but when it.
• 24:16
  Speaker 2: Comes to like the real deal, you know, and remember
• 24:18
  Speaker 2: you're there for each other.
• 24:20
  Speaker 1: Like despite everything, Like if you hear somebody's sick and
• 24:23
  Speaker 1: they comes younger, like six months, you find each other blave.
• 24:28
  Speaker 8: I'm like, you know, all genuine the lation six months
• 24:30
  Speaker 8: you know, and.
• 24:31
  Speaker 2: Stuff like that. You know, there is that bored and
• 24:35
  Speaker 2: growing up also with the math.
• 24:36
  Speaker 1: That's something I've also noticed because as we've been raised
• 24:39
  Speaker 1: with the mom most of our times, and I've been
• 24:41
  Speaker 1: a family of women because they're like four girls, So
• 24:45
  Speaker 1: there's a lot of strictness when it comes to raising
• 24:48
  Speaker 1: this type of family members. So my mom would go
• 24:51
  Speaker 1: like really hard on us. You know, we wouldn't have
• 24:53
  Speaker 1: like a lot of freedom, like hey, you can do
• 24:56
  Speaker 1: this and do this. There's always a few there's always
• 24:59
  Speaker 1: also you know, I want you back home. I want
• 25:03
  Speaker 1: you to come back with your sister and have this conversation.
• 25:06
  Speaker 1: You know, there's just strickness in that. But I think
• 25:08
  Speaker 1: it's been like a functional family in a way. Fights
• 25:12
  Speaker 1: happened there, But I also believe with we can't actually
• 25:16
  Speaker 1: say that it's dysfunctional in a way because I feel
• 25:18
  Speaker 1: like the relationship between your siblings, but also you tend
• 25:22
  Speaker 1: to find a way back to tell them because of that's.
• 25:25
  Speaker 2: A functional.
• 25:28
  Speaker 7: Hand.
• 25:28
  Speaker 6: You know, you have your lives, you know going on.
• 25:31
  Speaker 6: You need to be on each other's case every single time.
• 25:34
  Speaker 6: My husband did my my my my wife did kind
• 25:37
  Speaker 6: of cases because there see, seeing that kind of family
• 25:40
  Speaker 6: is literally where sisters update each other about how their
• 25:44
  Speaker 6: marriages is going, and it actually maderation the time tends
• 25:47
  Speaker 6: to actually lead to a dysfunctional family because you're taking
• 25:51
  Speaker 6: advice from someone who in going sense, you're not there.
• 25:55
  Speaker 6: They are your sister, yes, but in either way to
• 25:58
  Speaker 6: save marriage such kind of relationships where they terms being
• 26:03
  Speaker 6: kept about who didn't I'm just I'm from just watching
• 26:06
  Speaker 6: that TikTok video right now where there's the four women
• 26:10
  Speaker 6: or three women fighting another family because of our ploti
• 26:15
  Speaker 6: nico I was married there. Then their husband died and
• 26:19
  Speaker 6: then the other family because of the divorces mature.
• 26:23
  Speaker 2: You know, that's such kind of case.
• 26:24
  Speaker 6: So they're the first family who my dad had divorced,
• 26:27
  Speaker 6: but they left us dead property have come to fight us. Yeah,
• 26:31
  Speaker 6: you know letter men, a letter at my foot dream
• 26:35
  Speaker 6: and this luggage I've seen that. And if just going
• 26:40
  Speaker 6: work all the way, if who will call it this,
• 26:45
  Speaker 6: we can unite, Yeah, we can unite.
• 26:47
  Speaker 2: We're not supposed to be, you know, doing all this drama.
• 26:50
  Speaker 2: We can actually put it.
• 26:51
  Speaker 1: That is because of the absence, of course, it is
• 26:55
  Speaker 1: because the father is dead, was there and the people
• 27:00
  Speaker 1: you know, you would have this stuff in control.
• 27:02
  Speaker 6: Yeah, because we think we're talking about this way. It's
• 27:05
  Speaker 6: always about the man having control. About if you have
• 27:08
  Speaker 6: two wives literally the one to make things. You know,
• 27:12
  Speaker 6: this mom, and really they have to know. See you're
• 27:16
  Speaker 6: being biased this one and this one and if these
• 27:18
  Speaker 6: other If your children are getting these benefits, my children
• 27:22
  Speaker 6: also have to be getting equal benefits. It's not supposed
• 27:25
  Speaker 6: to be a bad situation. And this will Actually children
• 27:28
  Speaker 6: grew up with knowing to make water shares. Sorry, if
• 27:32
  Speaker 6: you can put money, We're gonna still divine because our
• 27:35
  Speaker 6: dad literally made this functional family.
• 27:38
  Speaker 2: But we're going back to my story a little bit.
• 27:41
  Speaker 2: After my mom, of course divorced, and growing up in
• 27:43
  Speaker 2: so many different.
• 27:45
  Speaker 6: Areas I've not been. I'm going up in Psycha. I've
• 27:49
  Speaker 6: been in the village after my dad and mom divorced.
• 27:52
  Speaker 6: Immediately after she found out I was being kept somewhere else,
• 27:56
  Speaker 6: she had probision to come take me only a weekend.
• 27:58
  Speaker 6: So one weekend she came, I can completely so hit
• 28:02
  Speaker 6: me of course culture. I stayed at Tea for two
• 28:05
  Speaker 6: years till the post election into the seven came back
• 28:09
  Speaker 6: in together.
• 28:09
  Speaker 2: Eight came to of course, remember but the first I
• 28:14
  Speaker 2: think the first time.
• 28:15
  Speaker 6: I saw or had a dysfunctional family, which of course
• 28:20
  Speaker 6: probably you guys have also had that in neighborhood, Yuliah,
• 28:23
  Speaker 6: what on a pana?
• 28:24
  Speaker 2: You know they has their wife just abusing each other
• 28:27
  Speaker 2: in front of the kids. Kid is crime.
• 28:29
  Speaker 6: Or their wife is always being beaten but she can't
• 28:32
  Speaker 6: work out. Man the next morning, man in edinbursing and.
• 28:43
  Speaker 12: What their love?
• 28:49
  Speaker 2: Oh my god, it is so crazy? Is crazy?
• 28:52
  Speaker 7: It is?
• 28:53
  Speaker 8: It is really really, my god, this is bad.
• 28:56
  Speaker 2: Mine is a normal thing.
• 28:57
  Speaker 6: In so the first time I all that, no knowing
• 29:01
  Speaker 6: the fact that and going back to the fact that
• 29:04
  Speaker 6: my dad's damped me for sister, and understanding a deal.
• 29:08
  Speaker 2: With the dysfunctional father. Now it came to my mom.
• 29:11
  Speaker 2: The first time I.
• 29:12
  Speaker 6: Saw, apart from just the neighborhood, I saw my mom
• 29:15
  Speaker 6: being hit and I was like, wait, what the heck
• 29:18
  Speaker 6: that's crazy. I'm like, what is what is really really
• 29:21
  Speaker 6: going on here?
• 29:22
  Speaker 1: You know?
• 29:22
  Speaker 6: For me, I'm just a child, I'm really confused, and
• 29:24
  Speaker 6: I'm like, wow, there's another dysfunctional family. Now understanding world
• 29:28
  Speaker 6: were discussing, I'm like, there's another dysfunctional family from my
• 29:31
  Speaker 6: dad to this one. Honey, just move on and care,
• 29:35
  Speaker 6: you know, And I'm glad eventually she did move out,
• 29:37
  Speaker 6: but of course moving to Psycher and many areas. I've
• 29:41
  Speaker 6: literally grown up and I've seen that, especially in gat
• 29:44
  Speaker 6: Mom Gunner and you just see a drama the whole night.
• 29:51
  Speaker 2: Usually it's chaotic morning.
• 29:56
  Speaker 6: She's probably pregnant and she's like why it was so
• 30:03
  Speaker 6: used to literally bother me a lot. I'm like, men,
• 30:05
  Speaker 6: I wish you can save yourself number one, as a woman,
• 30:07
  Speaker 6: you're walking away from this relationship and also let your
• 30:11
  Speaker 6: child know better because you're trying to tell your child
• 30:14
  Speaker 6: it's okay. And this is how we see cycle of
• 30:17
  Speaker 6: reputations of relationship because again what you're talking about men
• 30:20
  Speaker 6: from about exposure or women or anyone. It goes back
• 30:25
  Speaker 6: to you not being taught. You can have a functional family.
• 30:28
  Speaker 6: You can sit down and have a talk. You know,
• 30:30
  Speaker 6: it doesn't have to get physical. It doesn't have to
• 30:33
  Speaker 6: you know, you get into Da Massani, you know Couberbas,
• 30:37
  Speaker 6: Drewy TV men that, you know, such kind of things.
• 30:41
  Speaker 2: So I've grown up with that.
• 30:42
  Speaker 6: Of course, in the neighborhood and gets you hinny, yeah,
• 30:51
  Speaker 6: in the kieldhood or maybe you're a scire or even
• 30:54
  Speaker 6: your friends.
• 30:55
  Speaker 7: Yet into.
• 31:00
  Speaker 6: Personally they're coming from a dysfunctional family relationship.
• 31:04
  Speaker 2: But they don't. They don't know until maybe they realize it.
• 31:08
  Speaker 10: And it's always suicide when someone comes out of that
• 31:12
  Speaker 10: relationship kind of late, yeah, you know, maybe something that
• 31:17
  Speaker 10: has happened, they're like, okay, I don't.
• 31:19
  Speaker 9: Yeah.
• 31:20
  Speaker 10: And mostly if you say the women, they depend on
• 31:22
  Speaker 10: this that they can't go maybe the only way they
• 31:26
  Speaker 10: can go back home is go back to the village,
• 31:30
  Speaker 10: and they don't.
• 31:31
  Speaker 6: They don't want to go back to the And I
• 31:33
  Speaker 6: feel like that is also something that should also be
• 31:36
  Speaker 6: debated well, men or women actually should be specific even men,
• 31:40
  Speaker 6: you should dig well, the kind of a person you're
• 31:43
  Speaker 6: dealing with, you know, their family, you know, what kind
• 31:46
  Speaker 6: of a family do they come from?
• 31:48
  Speaker 2: Because sometimes you don't und standing a project because it
• 31:50
  Speaker 2: proper like you know, like especially in relationships, some come
• 31:56
  Speaker 2: to note that, like you need to understand.
• 31:58
  Speaker 6: The kind of a person you're dealing with. Where do
• 32:00
  Speaker 6: they come from? It's a functional family?
• 32:02
  Speaker 2: What issues?
• 32:03
  Speaker 6: If it's a functional family, is there any issues going on?
• 32:06
  Speaker 6: Maybe or maybe is it a dysfunctional family? Do they
• 32:09
  Speaker 6: have some certain some certain so of believes because when
• 32:13
  Speaker 6: I'm growing you know, believes that I can't change this
• 32:18
  Speaker 6: relationship should be because I know nothing better than this.
• 32:21
  Speaker 1: That is I feel like that is why when you're
• 32:23
  Speaker 1: dating somebody, you should meet the family members.
• 32:27
  Speaker 8: And when you meet the family members, probably an introduction.
• 32:30
  Speaker 7: It doesn't mean, it doesn't mean a relationship exactly.
• 32:34
  Speaker 1: I'm going to say, like a relationship that you are
• 32:38
  Speaker 1: you know, probably expecting or seeing a filtre with this person,
• 32:41
  Speaker 1: like it's getting serious.
• 32:44
  Speaker 2: He'll just a minute, kindly, you can't.
• 32:49
  Speaker 13: Yeah, man ever puts his hands on you first, you know,
• 33:05
  Speaker 13: you call me, but thank you better good women, you leave, immediately,
• 33:10
  Speaker 13: leave the relationship over then because the man that puts
• 33:15
  Speaker 13: his hand on you, because he does.
• 33:16
  Speaker 12: Not respect you. As long as I go downhill from there,
• 33:19
  Speaker 12: you never allow no man to hit you.
• 33:21
  Speaker 2: You're not nobody's punching bag.
• 33:23
  Speaker 14: You're not no one's child.
• 33:25
  Speaker 12: You are an adult.
• 33:27
  Speaker 2: So I just wanna put a hand.
• 33:29
  Speaker 12: On you and no, So I just want to make
• 33:31
  Speaker 12: sure we understand that. Yeah, because you don't say no
• 33:35
  Speaker 12: relationship ever.
• 33:36
  Speaker 1: Yeah, So yeah, I was seeing like if if it's
• 33:41
  Speaker 1: somebody like he's getting cervs and you have a future together,
• 33:45
  Speaker 1: it's really important to know his family members, to know
• 33:49
  Speaker 1: his family. Probably visit if you can. And that's why
• 33:52
  Speaker 1: as a woman when you grow up, uh, you go
• 33:55
  Speaker 1: visit a couple of times.
• 33:56
  Speaker 8: It just that just there. You don't just wake up
• 33:58
  Speaker 8: and marry somebody. You go there like for like three days.
• 34:02
  Speaker 8: You you you study, like how is this family?
• 34:04
  Speaker 7: You know?
• 34:04
  Speaker 2: You don't say for long, you like give yourself two days.
• 34:08
  Speaker 1: Yeah, two days, three days, and then you come back
• 34:10
  Speaker 1: after a few months again you check. You know, by
• 34:13
  Speaker 1: the time you're dating this type of person, you know,
• 34:16
  Speaker 1: you involved, you know, and then you will decide is
• 34:18
  Speaker 1: this the type of family I want to be in it?
• 34:21
  Speaker 2: You know, because sometimes you get to find the witch
• 34:23
  Speaker 2: doctors and.
• 34:23
  Speaker 8: Witch crafts take practice.
• 34:26
  Speaker 15: Stuff that you don't know, their brothers and drunkards and
• 34:30
  Speaker 15: you know, my grandmother, yeah.
• 34:40
  Speaker 2: I saw you.
• 34:41
  Speaker 6: As you continue when you go meet them, you want
• 34:45
  Speaker 6: to go over and over which to make a topic.
• 34:47
  Speaker 8: But it's.
• 34:50
  Speaker 2: How do you feel about your man's mother not liking you?
• 34:54
  Speaker 6: Because I think personally, I don't think I've messed that
• 34:57
  Speaker 6: kind of but I've seen people really bad. Mother laughter
• 35:01
  Speaker 6: really bad, like she doesn't just like her coming around
• 35:05
  Speaker 6: with a sign.
• 35:08
  Speaker 2: About the daughter or the guy like versa.
• 35:12
  Speaker 6: You know, either your mother doesn't like your guy or
• 35:15
  Speaker 6: either his mother doesn't like you, Like it's alwasy seem.
• 35:25
  Speaker 12: Exactly, you know, like away with his son.
• 35:29
  Speaker 1: I'm like, bro, you are taken care of your son,
• 35:32
  Speaker 1: so sotya I wanna have a master sat and you're
• 35:35
  Speaker 1: still claiming him.
• 35:36
  Speaker 2: Please is mine.
• 35:37
  Speaker 6: You're not gonna You're not gonna write him. That's the
• 35:41
  Speaker 6: first thing that Also that quote, I was like, you're
• 35:44
  Speaker 6: not gonna write him, So you're like him or not.
• 35:46
  Speaker 2: You can't fuck this man.
• 35:48
  Speaker 1: You know.
• 35:50
  Speaker 2: You don't have a baby.
• 35:52
  Speaker 6: Come on, it's either me or it shouldn't someone else. Literally,
• 35:56
  Speaker 6: either way, you're gonna you can't sit that's it.
• 35:58
  Speaker 2: Yeah, man.
• 35:59
  Speaker 1: But but it's funny because my personal experiences to the
• 36:03
  Speaker 1: mother in Lads of.
• 36:08
  Speaker 2: I just I've been changed super nice.
• 36:10
  Speaker 6: Yeah, to the point where they always feel like if
• 36:13
  Speaker 6: you guys have broken, I've come back.
• 36:16
  Speaker 8: Okay, I've never had a bad one.
• 36:18
  Speaker 1: But it's kind of like, really chance when you're gonna
• 36:21
  Speaker 1: meet the mother, really no chance because now you have
• 36:26
  Speaker 1: to play this character.
• 36:28
  Speaker 8: You know, I don't know what, I don't know why
• 36:31
  Speaker 8: we have to play this character.
• 36:33
  Speaker 1: It gets really really crazy, you know, and then now
• 36:35
  Speaker 1: you have to be this good person. But for a
• 36:38
  Speaker 1: few hours, you know, and you just hope that they're
• 36:43
  Speaker 1: really good people. And you always know what you say
• 36:46
  Speaker 1: and what say less.
• 36:48
  Speaker 8: Yeah, you're the series.
• 36:50
  Speaker 7: Say less, Say less.
• 36:53
  Speaker 8: Because it gets really chense.
• 37:01
  Speaker 2: Really because.
• 37:13
  Speaker 3: It is.
• 37:17
  Speaker 2: If you if you have probably if you have like
• 37:19
  Speaker 2: a like a mommy low that is like you.
• 37:21
  Speaker 8: The only thing you can do is you want to
• 37:23
  Speaker 8: have that type of relationship is first and foremost.
• 37:27
  Speaker 2: This is what you do.
• 37:28
  Speaker 8: Ask the boy, how is your man? What am I
• 37:31
  Speaker 8: expecting from your family before you come and meet them?
• 37:35
  Speaker 2: Exactly?
• 37:35
  Speaker 8: And he has to be mature because if it's a
• 37:37
  Speaker 8: mommy's boy, that is.
• 37:38
  Speaker 7: You already know you can tell a mummy's boy, because.
• 37:47
  Speaker 1: That's the problem because before you before you meet somebody's parents,
• 37:51
  Speaker 1: you must have known this person for a very long time.
• 37:53
  Speaker 8: Right, You've given yourself time with this guy. He is
• 37:56
  Speaker 8: I don't know how many months you pro takes.
• 37:58
  Speaker 1: So if it's a mom's boy, you're definitely tell when
• 38:00
  Speaker 1: you're still dating even without the parents. It is like
• 38:04
  Speaker 1: calling his mom to confirm stuff. It is like, oh
• 38:07
  Speaker 1: my mom, provides for me, you.
• 38:09
  Speaker 8: Know all my family.
• 38:10
  Speaker 1: No, that's not a real man. Literally, So if you go,
• 38:13
  Speaker 1: you have to ask that question, how is your family?
• 38:15
  Speaker 1: Where am I expecting from seeing your family?
• 38:19
  Speaker 2: What are they gonna ask me? If you know?
• 38:20
  Speaker 8: And it's always as easy as that.
• 38:22
  Speaker 1: If you find somebody who doesn't like you just the
• 38:26
  Speaker 1: first time, it's gonna be hard, but they would do
• 38:28
  Speaker 1: I think think the worst thing they can do it.
• 38:33
  Speaker 2: If you stay away from them, like you stay a
• 38:35
  Speaker 2: city away, Yeah.
• 38:41
  Speaker 8: A country possible? Like, man, that's crazy.
• 39:00
  Speaker 10: Thing, Like your mother is going to their in laws
• 39:02
  Speaker 10: and just believing with them, like why you have come
• 39:07
  Speaker 10: for a week or two?
• 39:08
  Speaker 9: Yeah?
• 39:13
  Speaker 7: Right, tell you tell you that, you know, you know.
• 39:18
  Speaker 7: But the woman's gonna problem in that.
• 39:22
  Speaker 12: My mom mom them because the daughter that's her house,
• 39:28
  Speaker 12: like the.
• 39:28
  Speaker 14: Sera way, and then the mother will come out and
• 39:31
  Speaker 14: try to dominate.
• 39:33
  Speaker 12: But this play is always the house it's gonna cause because.
• 39:40
  Speaker 2: This is what he likes. What do you mean this
• 39:42
  Speaker 2: is what he likes?
• 39:43
  Speaker 8: I don't.
• 39:47
  Speaker 10: Speaking dinner, reading all the dinner plans you had or
• 39:51
  Speaker 10: you've been having for the week.
• 39:53
  Speaker 2: It's just annoying.
• 39:54
  Speaker 8: Don't you think that that's not the same letting that
• 39:56
  Speaker 8: that's what I'm saying.
• 39:57
  Speaker 10: It's a mommy's boy too, like they allow, yeah, and love, mamma,
• 40:02
  Speaker 10: miss your first what I'm here?
• 40:07
  Speaker 2: We want to get at your place? And right, so.
• 40:17
  Speaker 12: Your car does your mother?
• 40:22
  Speaker 2: And my mother stays in the why is he on
• 40:28
  Speaker 2: the front seats? And and and and.
• 40:33
  Speaker 7: Here and again.
• 40:38
  Speaker 8: You know this is not even supposed to be a
• 40:39
  Speaker 8: conversation for.
• 40:40
  Speaker 1: Really bad because if you find your mom and whife
• 40:44
  Speaker 1: fighting over he's gonna sit in the.
• 40:46
  Speaker 2: Front you're the man, like, why why is your.
• 40:54
  Speaker 1: Yeah, it's crazy, that is because the sign doesn't know
• 40:57
  Speaker 1: how to differentiate the boundaries.
• 41:00
  Speaker 2: And if your mom is that type of person and
• 41:02
  Speaker 2: you're a man, sit.
• 41:03
  Speaker 1: Down with your your madther and have a conversation. I
• 41:07
  Speaker 1: never used to see my grandmother's coming. They were coming
• 41:09
  Speaker 1: for two days, thank.
• 41:10
  Speaker 2: You, two days a shameful and and and I like
• 41:15
  Speaker 2: in my child, really they don't because they shouldn't see
• 41:20
  Speaker 2: yuld Okay, you should.
• 41:21
  Speaker 6: They should for one day, It's okay, but they should
• 41:24
  Speaker 6: also feel I seen those who feel some.
• 41:26
  Speaker 2: Type of way like, hey, I'm staking at my children's house.
• 41:28
  Speaker 2: Yeah I should, that's my mom. Yeah, that's my I
• 41:32
  Speaker 2: should feel some type of way.
• 41:37
  Speaker 10: Tribe like they don't the sons, they don't really allow
• 41:41
  Speaker 10: their mothers to come and live with them for more
• 41:44
  Speaker 10: than one day. I'm getting right.
• 41:49
  Speaker 2: I don't believe it's a though.
• 41:51
  Speaker 1: Yeah, yeah, in my tribe, like for example, if I'm
• 41:56
  Speaker 1: not married and really I'm living with this man, you know,
• 41:58
  Speaker 1: like the tradition married the wa it was. My mom
• 42:01
  Speaker 1: can never come to my place, never ever, like never
• 42:05
  Speaker 1: four kids, never ever, she can never ca be she
• 42:09
  Speaker 1: want to see the kids, You tell the kids to her,
• 42:11
  Speaker 1: or you meet.
• 42:12
  Speaker 8: Somewhere else, not at your matrimonial home.
• 42:15
  Speaker 2: Yeah, it's very respected.
• 42:16
  Speaker 1: Yeah yeah, and they don't even talk like this really
• 42:21
  Speaker 1: this can we talk about the relationship between mother in
• 42:23
  Speaker 1: laws and son in laws like you like you want
• 42:26
  Speaker 1: to call your mother in law and two for three hours,
• 42:29
  Speaker 1: laughing the whole call.
• 42:31
  Speaker 8: That's my mother, are you kid?
• 42:33
  Speaker 2: That's my mom?
• 42:41
  Speaker 8: Really?
• 42:42
  Speaker 2: Who is man to the extent? Really?
• 42:46
  Speaker 8: Oh my god?
• 42:46
  Speaker 2: Yeah?
• 42:47
  Speaker 1: Yeah, I don't even see like really for my brothers
• 42:50
  Speaker 1: in law, they really you know, we see them in
• 42:52
  Speaker 1: burials unless you go to their places. We see them
• 42:56
  Speaker 1: in buriols and probably weddings, but mostly in bats mostly burials.
• 43:02
  Speaker 1: Like literally, that's when I see now all of them together,
• 43:05
  Speaker 1: I've never had like, oh my.
• 43:06
  Speaker 8: God, let's go. I don't know. Probably it's different families
• 43:11
  Speaker 8: and different tribes and how it's.
• 43:14
  Speaker 2: Supposed to be. That's what I'm saying.
• 43:15
  Speaker 6: When you go back to what I was saying, whether
• 43:18
  Speaker 6: we have and I've seen those such of relationships sister
• 43:21
  Speaker 6: keeping tabs with their other sister, all their marriage is doing.
• 43:24
  Speaker 2: Emions are actually when the whole relationship. Yeah, I've seen that.
• 43:29
  Speaker 6: Trust me, Like I've seen where you Maybe your life
• 43:32
  Speaker 6: is okay, you have the street in your good but
• 43:34
  Speaker 6: my husband is just a no croup. I'm from somewhere
• 43:36
  Speaker 6: I picked you know. But when of course, when you
• 43:39
  Speaker 6: sell everything is only supper, super good. Your life is
• 43:41
  Speaker 6: doing amazing. So I'm trying to complain to you not
• 43:47
  Speaker 6: it's in a way of what I'm talking about my marriage.
• 43:49
  Speaker 2: I get that solution number one.
• 43:51
  Speaker 6: I can't even handle my own relationship, so I need
• 43:53
  Speaker 6: that that party because let's be honest, we have those
• 43:55
  Speaker 6: people believe at that party can solve everything, especially in relationship.
• 44:00
  Speaker 6: Family included. How many people are recently going to churches
• 44:03
  Speaker 6: to include that we took to call over the mother
• 44:07
  Speaker 6: and Norma Chimney for you guys to talk. So I'm
• 44:11
  Speaker 6: saying that where sisters keeping tabs with each other's marriage
• 44:15
  Speaker 6: and it ends up ended up ruining the marriage of
• 44:17
  Speaker 6: the other one because she's fading new advice that herself she's.
• 44:21
  Speaker 2: Not gonna do at the end of the day against
• 44:24
  Speaker 2: your money, I'm sleeping with my husband, is sleeping with
• 44:26
  Speaker 2: your husband?
• 44:27
  Speaker 7: Tell you.
• 44:30
  Speaker 1: I went to the grisky doggle because first and almost
• 44:34
  Speaker 1: me and my younger sister, you have the best relationship, okay,
• 44:37
  Speaker 1: And she's like my god to confid you know, every
• 44:41
  Speaker 1: time if and and and every time, like even if
• 44:44
  Speaker 1: there is like communication that.
• 44:45
  Speaker 8: I'm not told, she'll come and tell me, hey, this
• 44:48
  Speaker 8: is about to happen, you know, and this and this
• 44:50
  Speaker 8: and this, She'll tell me on the load and then
• 44:53
  Speaker 8: I'll just see it and I shall have known. So
• 44:55
  Speaker 8: she's my god. Yes, we are very very close.
• 44:58
  Speaker 1: And it's good to know that somebody has your back
• 45:00
  Speaker 1: that I can rely on if, for example, I'm having
• 45:03
  Speaker 1: a really bad time and they need space off my husband.
• 45:06
  Speaker 1: We are married to start with this guy, and my
• 45:08
  Speaker 1: sister is there to offer me a hand. I feel
• 45:11
  Speaker 1: safer because of the relationship we have. You know, I'll
• 45:15
  Speaker 1: feel safe I just telling you, telling me, hey know
• 45:19
  Speaker 1: that I got you regardless of this and this.
• 45:21
  Speaker 2: So it also.
• 45:21
  Speaker 1: Depends with the kind of relationship you have with your siblings. Yeah,
• 45:26
  Speaker 1: because sometimes it's really good. But from the dysfunctional families
• 45:31
  Speaker 1: literally said, it also includes the relationship between your siblings.
• 45:34
  Speaker 8: It might be bad because they also take advantage.
• 45:37
  Speaker 1: You have these family meetings. If you have like really
• 45:39
  Speaker 1: those bird sisters, they'll use that against you. You say,
• 45:43
  Speaker 1: the absent, don't you'll have on your marriage.
• 45:46
  Speaker 8: Probably no sisters.
• 45:47
  Speaker 1: Like for me and my sisters, we are four, we
• 45:49
  Speaker 1: are we are women, right, so the two of us
• 45:51
  Speaker 1: are close. The two of them are really close. It
• 45:52
  Speaker 1: just happened like that, you know. So sometimes this one
• 45:56
  Speaker 1: is the confident of that if you tell how it's
• 45:58
  Speaker 1: here that there really knows and I told you you
• 46:01
  Speaker 1: know so stuff and stuff like that. So probably if
• 46:03
  Speaker 1: you're opening up and you don't have that kind of relationship,
• 46:06
  Speaker 1: will find some some of that.
• 46:09
  Speaker 8: Again, it's you in a certain way. They even talk
• 46:12
  Speaker 8: about your family.
• 46:13
  Speaker 1: But it also depends with the type of relationship you
• 46:16
  Speaker 1: have among sibling.
• 46:17
  Speaker 2: I agree.
• 46:18
  Speaker 6: I agree because I've seen that at growing up. I
• 46:22
  Speaker 6: don't give too many dissions, but of course have been made.
• 46:25
  Speaker 6: Someone is whining about their husband. The information that is
• 46:28
  Speaker 6: being given literally.
• 46:33
  Speaker 2: Reship. It's my story. It's my story, that's why.
• 46:40
  Speaker 6: But as we digress a little bit on our what
• 46:43
  Speaker 6: I was talking about, also part of this functional family
• 46:47
  Speaker 6: or a dysfunctional family also does relate or rely on.
• 46:51
  Speaker 6: Also our child also asks because yes, the father figure
• 46:54
  Speaker 6: might be there, the mother figure, but the child actually
• 46:57
  Speaker 6: wrotten behaviors. And I want to give a good example.
• 47:00
  Speaker 6: Car growing up used to go maybe to some houses
• 47:03
  Speaker 6: of your friends. You see them doing something you guys
• 47:05
  Speaker 6: cannot do in the house. You're like, hey, you guys
• 47:07
  Speaker 6: can watch the TV and your dad is.
• 47:09
  Speaker 2: Not asking you alone. Yeah, but it's true because first me.
• 47:24
  Speaker 6: Keep it at ten, Well, bro, TV do know much?
• 47:30
  Speaker 6: So for me can maybe places before sleeping tea. I
• 47:33
  Speaker 6: remember the first time actually I went to my auntie's
• 47:35
  Speaker 6: house when my mom passed away because my cousins were there.
• 47:39
  Speaker 6: They were sleeping at three I'm like, you guys are
• 47:41
  Speaker 6: sleeping at three am in the morning.
• 47:44
  Speaker 2: It was a shop for me. I'm like where you
• 47:46
  Speaker 2: can never be in our house, you know.
• 47:48
  Speaker 6: So I believe growing up, every one of us, like
• 47:50
  Speaker 6: we saw some things that were off in other families
• 47:52
  Speaker 6: which was functional and should be functional.
• 47:56
  Speaker 2: Watching TV, which is that time?
• 47:57
  Speaker 6: So long as you know, you know what tomorrow is
• 47:59
  Speaker 6: supposed to be in school by this time, don't disturb me. Fine,
• 48:02
  Speaker 6: if you can keep up with yourself, you know, you know,
• 48:08
  Speaker 6: like such kind of things. So I don't know what
• 48:10
  Speaker 6: kind of things did you maybe an example of what
• 48:13
  Speaker 6: you so one time off and you're like, this is
• 48:16
  Speaker 6: something you can't do in you guys house.
• 48:18
  Speaker 2: Probably personally if.
• 48:20
  Speaker 1: I start by me, I remember some few stuff I
• 48:22
  Speaker 1: would used to go to visit other families. I'd see
• 48:25
  Speaker 1: the relationship, the openness between the parents and their kids,
• 48:30
  Speaker 1: like I think examples like they would they'd be open. No,
• 48:40
  Speaker 1: I'm not talking about kids. Come down, I'm not saying
• 48:43
  Speaker 1: my part. It's not not to let these stories together.
• 48:47
  Speaker 1: Like for example, like you're allowed to go out, you
• 48:51
  Speaker 1: know at a certain age.
• 48:52
  Speaker 8: You know they'd be like in high school and they
• 48:55
  Speaker 8: go out as we are, you know, as.
• 48:57
  Speaker 2: Would never be you know, like you guys go out
• 49:02
  Speaker 2: at this age and their mom knows that and they're
• 49:06
  Speaker 2: cool and the mom.
• 49:07
  Speaker 1: We would have conversations, some would be given cords, right,
• 49:12
  Speaker 1: you know. I didn't see that like those shocked me,
• 49:15
  Speaker 1: you know, and something like that. And the conversations they'd
• 49:18
  Speaker 1: be so often to talk to their parents about everything.
• 49:21
  Speaker 1: They never be scared. So first in my mind, exactly, yeah,
• 49:31
  Speaker 1: So I that that that is something I saw that
• 49:34
  Speaker 1: was different. I'd be like, hmm, this family is kind
• 49:37
  Speaker 1: of weird or I don't understand this family because IM
• 49:42
  Speaker 1: in my mind and I know that this is how
• 49:44
  Speaker 1: the family is supposed to be, this is how I've
• 49:46
  Speaker 1: been raised, And then I see something that is mostly
• 49:49
  Speaker 1: it came with the strictness and also the boys. Like
• 49:54
  Speaker 1: from a family of girls, the boys are left like
• 49:58
  Speaker 1: they can come in at nali whatever whatever time. As
• 50:02
  Speaker 1: we would come back at five, like after five my.
• 50:05
  Speaker 8: Goodness, explain where I came from, you know, and and
• 50:09
  Speaker 8: such kind.
• 50:10
  Speaker 1: But when my brother was like in high school, he
• 50:12
  Speaker 1: came back at nine and there was nothing that food
• 50:15
  Speaker 1: kept for him.
• 50:16
  Speaker 8: I'm like, who you legs? Like why are you not mad?
• 50:19
  Speaker 2: You know, and stuff like that.
• 50:20
  Speaker 8: So I saw that that that so different from I
• 50:23
  Speaker 8: also saw that.
• 50:26
  Speaker 2: My boys maybe by five exactly very fine members. Yes,
• 50:33
  Speaker 2: this is.
• 50:40
  Speaker 6: Especially if you've gone with documents asking for permission the
• 50:43
  Speaker 6: worst days.
• 50:43
  Speaker 2: Yeah, like what am I going to say? Yeah, I've
• 50:46
  Speaker 2: seen that.
• 50:47
  Speaker 6: Also also even drolling with boys. Yeah, there's some places
• 50:52
  Speaker 6: again like girls and boys.
• 50:54
  Speaker 2: If you're founder there would bring them that boy. It's
• 50:59
  Speaker 2: a taboo. Yeah, you know, so many things.
• 51:03
  Speaker 6: We're waiting for you as random, any random like something.
• 51:06
  Speaker 6: So that's maybe guys probably in your house and you're
• 51:10
  Speaker 6: so like, hey, this can never be in our house
• 51:13
  Speaker 6: or this.
• 51:13
  Speaker 10: Is I think I had a good relationship with my
• 51:17
  Speaker 10: past because we had this.
• 51:21
  Speaker 9: Pull gram to watch together, like even later at night.
• 51:25
  Speaker 2: Just me and him, just really like my mom was
• 51:28
  Speaker 2: not there. She doesn't turn Yeah yeah, but.
• 51:33
  Speaker 9: I was allowed to go to like family friends like
• 51:35
  Speaker 9: my parents knew. But it's like, are you coming from Kelly?
• 51:39
  Speaker 2: It was Kelly, Yeah, because I remember.
• 51:42
  Speaker 10: But the party is going to get for us cook
• 51:46
  Speaker 10: because I have like older siblings than me, so I
• 51:49
  Speaker 10: don't think the past older than me and go to
• 51:52
  Speaker 10: events since they're older than me, and I'm with that,
• 51:55
  Speaker 10: so I'm literally safe.
• 51:56
  Speaker 8: But they have.
• 52:02
  Speaker 9: I have two brothers and three sisters.
• 52:07
  Speaker 2: You'll see.
• 52:08
  Speaker 12: Yeah, yeah, you're breaking, you're breaking and you can't.
• 52:26
  Speaker 2: I have twelve, I'm an twelve. Nice, Yeah, I'm.
• 52:36
  Speaker 8: Yeah.
• 52:37
  Speaker 2: That's nice. People sunny, Yeah, that's nice.
• 52:40
  Speaker 8: Only not married and somewhat up group were together.
• 52:47
  Speaker 2: Together. I don't know if they're highly expected. Keep on
• 52:53
  Speaker 2: waiting really.
• 52:55
  Speaker 9: Like my parents have never discussion.
• 52:58
  Speaker 2: It's good. Well, haven't better? Pla Yeah, yesterday you were
• 53:07
  Speaker 2: almost started. People married? Am I going to get married?
• 53:12
  Speaker 2: I have a job. Do you have a world stable home?
• 53:14
  Speaker 7: Yeah?
• 53:15
  Speaker 2: You my relationship never you get your girls?
• 53:22
  Speaker 7: Yeah?
• 53:23
  Speaker 6: Should it should be a position you're making on your own,
• 53:27
  Speaker 6: you know, nobody should first. You should be comfortable reading
• 53:30
  Speaker 6: mentally if it's heavy, because it comes with a whole lot.
• 53:34
  Speaker 14: You young, yeah, okay, okay, yeah.
• 53:49
  Speaker 2: But of course, growing up apart from what now we're seeing,
• 53:52
  Speaker 2: which was a shock to.
• 53:53
  Speaker 6: Us growing up now at my age, I think you're
• 53:56
  Speaker 6: see some things that are off of lie of our
• 54:00
  Speaker 6: It's the relationship now kids out with their parents could
• 54:02
  Speaker 6: be a mother daughter relationship, a mother's relationship, of other
• 54:06
  Speaker 6: SA relationship relationship I've seen. Number one of the things
• 54:10
  Speaker 6: is the normalization of kissing, especially mother SA relationship kissing the.
• 54:15
  Speaker 8: Sun on the mouth.
• 54:17
  Speaker 2: I'm not gonna mention names, but I've seen some celebrities
• 54:19
  Speaker 2: normalizing this. It is bad. It's bad sid when they
• 54:27
  Speaker 2: young young's.
• 54:28
  Speaker 6: Hour, but when this boy is growing up to the
• 54:30
  Speaker 6: point of understanding you know some things.
• 54:34
  Speaker 2: I think at the age of six five, that is
• 54:37
  Speaker 2: a great That is a boy growing.
• 54:39
  Speaker 6: All right, we're not talking about young two years two
• 54:42
  Speaker 6: three years from the age of I think five, that
• 54:45
  Speaker 6: is someone who's not grown. But letther now they're growing
• 54:50
  Speaker 6: being a man, not being a gay gally type of thing,
• 54:55
  Speaker 6: because that takes me back to the dysfunctional family now
• 55:00
  Speaker 6: simle parenthood and which majority we've seen.
• 55:05
  Speaker 2: It's leading to.
• 55:07
  Speaker 6: Let's say, like single mothers, those who left maybe their
• 55:11
  Speaker 6: relationship decided, you know, I'm a better independent too many
• 55:14
  Speaker 6: and all that. And you are a young son, maybe
• 55:18
  Speaker 6: you are man this son. The only faces is you.
• 55:21
  Speaker 6: You're the father figure, you're the mother figure. But the
• 55:24
  Speaker 6: type of further figure you're putting is literally the same
• 55:27
  Speaker 6: as a mother figure, which includes maybe because I've seen
• 55:30
  Speaker 6: on TikTok TikTok as an example, someone using their sam
• 55:34
  Speaker 6: for makeup within installation and all that, and I'm like,
• 55:38
  Speaker 6: by the time this set by the age of ten
• 55:41
  Speaker 6: Americ talent skills is in gaming, you've already still had
• 55:45
  Speaker 6: ideas in this boy's mind, teaching them that to be
• 55:48
  Speaker 6: in a girl number one is okay and if they
• 55:51
  Speaker 6: don't have that, which they don't have the masculinity figure
• 55:55
  Speaker 6: to show them this is wrong.
• 55:57
  Speaker 2: That's what it turns up to, you know, normalizing of
• 55:59
  Speaker 2: you with them. You kiss them, you know, so what
• 56:02
  Speaker 2: do they know best?
• 56:04
  Speaker 7: You know?
• 56:04
  Speaker 6: So I feel like that is one kissing I've seen
• 56:08
  Speaker 6: children just in in high school, we used to have
• 56:12
  Speaker 6: look some month, I can't forget the mom that was
• 56:16
  Speaker 6: visiting days were parents would come to visit their kids.
• 56:18
  Speaker 1: So we had like once in a semester in so
• 56:22
  Speaker 1: the man would come. I think she was from coast
• 56:23
  Speaker 1: radius when used to kiss her in the mouth. It
• 56:29
  Speaker 1: was shocking because I'm like, no, but Samantha and the mom.
• 56:37
  Speaker 2: The keys not not not that bad, isn't you know?
• 56:41
  Speaker 7: There's pack.
• 56:44
  Speaker 2: And there would be that's like yeah, that in the mouth.
• 56:49
  Speaker 2: Think that's bad.
• 56:51
  Speaker 1: It was weird for me because I've never seen so
• 56:53
  Speaker 1: we had the whole discussion in school, as you.
• 56:55
  Speaker 2: Do you because I feel like this before.
• 56:59
  Speaker 6: I feel like, as you do this, you should let
• 57:01
  Speaker 6: the child know the kind of dangers to expect outside there.
• 57:06
  Speaker 6: And I speak of dangerous is the lgebitic genders. I'm
• 57:09
  Speaker 6: not doing this to show you this is what the
• 57:12
  Speaker 6: society is about. I'm doing this to reflect my love
• 57:16
  Speaker 6: to you, literally showing my love towards you. So I
• 57:19
  Speaker 6: believe if you've grown up with the understanding of this
• 57:22
  Speaker 6: is only apparent mother relationship, I'm not supposed to.
• 57:26
  Speaker 1: Not to be in a lesbian And I think also
• 57:28
  Speaker 1: we are this discussion the whole I don't know almost
• 57:31
  Speaker 1: the old school cultures we are as you never saw that.
• 57:34
  Speaker 8: I was shocked, but there was.
• 57:35
  Speaker 1: Also a conversation of that is how it's has something
• 57:38
  Speaker 1: to do with her tribe or something, or how they
• 57:41
  Speaker 1: say from where they come from, you know.
• 57:43
  Speaker 8: Kissing the lips, like pecking the lisp.
• 57:45
  Speaker 6: I'd say, for me, you know my early I got
• 57:48
  Speaker 6: out from my MOMMENTALI like okay, okay, So for me
• 57:57
  Speaker 6: it was it was not that something bad. Yeah, But
• 57:59
  Speaker 6: I feel like now as you get, of course into
• 58:02
  Speaker 6: the video that we are to share. Of course, this lady,
• 58:06
  Speaker 6: and it's not the first one I've seen they managed
• 58:10
  Speaker 6: to be funny, funny and their cleaning is the father
• 58:14
  Speaker 6: and not a relationship, you know, just some funny, funny,
• 58:18
  Speaker 6: touchy touchy, you know. And I feel like that is
• 58:22
  Speaker 6: I don't know because I was saying through the comments
• 58:24
  Speaker 6: most of the people on them, the people are complaining
• 58:27
  Speaker 6: about this behavior and the dysfunctional family, not understanding our
• 58:31
  Speaker 6: functional family works, but but also the boundaries.
• 58:36
  Speaker 8: But you know, people, before you play people, I feel like, yes,
• 58:40
  Speaker 8: you can be closed.
• 58:41
  Speaker 1: There can be a relationship between you and your dad,
• 58:44
  Speaker 1: right because for life, we're gonna be their babies.
• 58:47
  Speaker 8: You know, it's not at this age your baby.
• 58:50
  Speaker 7: You forever be their kids.
• 58:51
  Speaker 1: You know, even if you have like your own kids,
• 58:54
  Speaker 1: you'll still be their baby. So at the end of
• 58:57
  Speaker 1: the day, this is like I'm gonna be your baby
• 58:59
  Speaker 1: for life, you know. But also as you grow up,
• 59:03
  Speaker 1: they're supposed to be like understanding that this is a girl,
• 59:07
  Speaker 1: she's getting into this type of age, this is a
• 59:10
  Speaker 1: man is growing into a man.
• 59:12
  Speaker 8: You know, this stuff of I saw this.
• 59:14
  Speaker 1: Like you know when when when we grew up, was
• 59:18
  Speaker 1: grow up in our home, when my well, now my
• 59:20
  Speaker 1: brother is growing a little bit older, he was built
• 59:24
  Speaker 1: for a house outside of our place where he could
• 59:26
  Speaker 1: have his own privacy. And as we used to live
• 59:29
  Speaker 1: in our own compound, so we used to like so
• 59:30
  Speaker 1: because your girls, we used to like well like really
• 59:33
  Speaker 1: short stuff. Yeah, sometimes he wouldn't pani because you're no
• 59:36
  Speaker 1: own compound, Joe, You're not gonna get.
• 59:42
  Speaker 2: It's real.
• 59:44
  Speaker 8: It's really like the coastal regions because of the lake.
• 59:47
  Speaker 2: Yeah.
• 59:47
  Speaker 1: So again that's my sister and I'm going have bra
• 59:53
  Speaker 1: And then one time my mom, my mom comes and
• 59:55
  Speaker 1: sits to that. Actually didn't know what was wrong.
• 59:57
  Speaker 8: I didn't even notice because my brother is young. I
• 59:59
  Speaker 8: didn't not he's turning.
• 1:00:00
  Speaker 7: Into a man, because.
• 1:00:04
  Speaker 1: You know, I I've seen that, you know, so in
• 1:00:08
  Speaker 1: my mind is gonna be just letting him get into
• 1:00:12
  Speaker 1: a man is kind of was kind of hard, even
• 1:00:16
  Speaker 1: when I see with my family members, you know sometimes
• 1:00:19
  Speaker 1: that there can be treatment. So there was there was
• 1:00:21
  Speaker 1: a time where he'll try to explain himself and everybody
• 1:00:24
  Speaker 1: still be like, what's that picture?
• 1:00:27
  Speaker 7: Dog?
• 1:00:29
  Speaker 8: Dog?
• 1:00:30
  Speaker 6: You know.
• 1:00:30
  Speaker 1: So when we were my mom came and sit and
• 1:00:33
  Speaker 1: sat us down and told us, hey, listen, your brother
• 1:00:38
  Speaker 1: is not a.
• 1:00:38
  Speaker 8: Child anymore anymore.
• 1:00:40
  Speaker 2: So I want you guys to stop wearing all these things.
• 1:00:43
  Speaker 1: Yeah, she was like you you know, I didn't say
• 1:00:48
  Speaker 1: that a big you know, I'm like, he's still a
• 1:00:50
  Speaker 1: kid now kumber.
• 1:00:51
  Speaker 8: And India class seven.
• 1:00:53
  Speaker 1: Yeah, so we had to like change that until it
• 1:00:59
  Speaker 1: was built for his house at a very younger age.
• 1:01:02
  Speaker 1: He was built for his house while he would just
• 1:01:04
  Speaker 1: have his own privates. And my mom doesn't go to
• 1:01:06
  Speaker 1: that house at that season.
• 1:01:08
  Speaker 8: You can't just walk in.
• 1:01:10
  Speaker 1: You have to know, yeah, you have to know. You
• 1:01:12
  Speaker 1: have to understand this person is going into a man.
• 1:01:14
  Speaker 1: This boundaries between also man, the murder and the sand.
• 1:01:18
  Speaker 1: The same way there's gonna be boundaries if my father,
• 1:01:21
  Speaker 1: like I won't having conversations for example, like periods I
• 1:01:25
  Speaker 1: used to see because I used to see my sister
• 1:01:28
  Speaker 1: answer right, and they were never embarrassed to have that corn.
• 1:01:31
  Speaker 1: In fact, my father was there that was buying all
• 1:01:33
  Speaker 1: that stuff, the pads everything. It was because my mom
• 1:01:36
  Speaker 1: would be like better pads, you know, and it was
• 1:01:40
  Speaker 1: not embarrassing because me and my kid, I remember to
• 1:01:42
  Speaker 1: watch TV. Could concia always your present TV? So my
• 1:01:47
  Speaker 1: sisters sard when so many cord now you.
• 1:01:59
  Speaker 2: And I asked what else like young mass.
• 1:02:06
  Speaker 1: You know, I am, I don't my dad coming because
• 1:02:09
  Speaker 1: you're not the way used to be nice and that's
• 1:02:12
  Speaker 1: so embarrassed in that type of way. I didn't understand
• 1:02:15
  Speaker 1: till I was like, oh, okay, what shouldn't let oh
• 1:02:18
  Speaker 1: these this kuna some weirdness And it comes about the
• 1:02:24
  Speaker 1: father and the daughters, you know when you so there's
• 1:02:27
  Speaker 1: always that boundary. Just that day, my friend was going
• 1:02:30
  Speaker 1: to see the daughter. The daughter is not any into
• 1:02:33
  Speaker 1: a teenager like a cooked so and you know, so
• 1:02:41
  Speaker 1: I don't know, you don't have a bigger picture a
• 1:02:43
  Speaker 1: piggy pitcher now you and she cannot because like now
• 1:02:50
  Speaker 1: she's turning into an adult. And listen, you have to
• 1:02:53
  Speaker 1: you have to respect that.
• 1:02:55
  Speaker 8: You know, you want to have your father coming to
• 1:02:56
  Speaker 8: you and your play.
• 1:02:59
  Speaker 1: You know, there's that kind of respect and I feel
• 1:03:01
  Speaker 1: like that is something you're supposed to like have or
• 1:03:04
  Speaker 1: relate with your kid about. Yeah, it's very very important
• 1:03:07
  Speaker 1: because people don't know that boundary is so much and
• 1:03:09
  Speaker 1: that's kissing your son. It becomes something that is all
• 1:03:13
  Speaker 1: people like why are you kissing that grown up man?
• 1:03:15
  Speaker 8: Or why are you kissing your daughter? Why are you
• 1:03:17
  Speaker 8: like this with somebody.
• 1:03:18
  Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah, it's crazy man, someone had this video. But
• 1:03:21
  Speaker 2: before that chat, drumst.
• 1:03:23
  Speaker 6: Caribou Sana Hello to you too, he says, I'm just
• 1:03:26
  Speaker 6: from TikTok for the past two ards fighting and I'm
• 1:03:29
  Speaker 6: doing bootlegs on TikTok, Like, come on.
• 1:03:32
  Speaker 2: Show them the fire, show them that black caught fire.
• 1:03:36
  Speaker 6: But thank you so much for tuning in today's TALKIC
• 1:03:39
  Speaker 6: is the difference between a functional family and a dysfunctional family,
• 1:03:44
  Speaker 6: a functional and a dysfunctional family. Just given our differences
• 1:03:47
  Speaker 6: of some of the things you've grown up, you know
• 1:03:50
  Speaker 6: how we've grown up.
• 1:03:53
  Speaker 2: What I'm saying, she's.
• 1:03:54
  Speaker 6: Grown up in a functional family, functional family, dysfunctional family.
• 1:03:58
  Speaker 2: Personally, I don't know about you.
• 1:04:00
  Speaker 6: Almost cretial you're gonna up in a functional family or
• 1:04:02
  Speaker 6: dysfunctional family. And also we're getting into another segment still
• 1:04:07
  Speaker 6: have the same same debate by sharing some of the
• 1:04:12
  Speaker 6: off behaviors of functional families, like you know, parents kissing children,
• 1:04:19
  Speaker 6: you know, some off behaviors like this video right here
• 1:04:21
  Speaker 6: I'm about to share.
• 1:04:33
  Speaker 2: So lucky for those were with us on the network,
• 1:04:35
  Speaker 2: they can see the video.
• 1:04:36
  Speaker 6: I shout out to everyone of you, I see you there,
• 1:04:38
  Speaker 6: So This is an example of, according to majority of
• 1:04:42
  Speaker 6: those are in their comments, a functional family, a father
• 1:04:45
  Speaker 6: just you know, taking new the father taking you, hugging you,
• 1:04:53
  Speaker 6: kissing you in a respectful way, of course, not in
• 1:04:56
  Speaker 6: their mouth.
• 1:04:57
  Speaker 2: The badgroom, the cheek.
• 1:04:58
  Speaker 6: So I don't know, according too started the I don't
• 1:05:02
  Speaker 6: know if you've seen the video, okay, but this is
• 1:05:06
  Speaker 6: the video that's the.
• 1:05:08
  Speaker 2: Father and their daughter so lovely and so so what
• 1:05:24
  Speaker 2: are your thoughts regarding that?
• 1:05:25
  Speaker 6: Because took comments of a Dangley not want to say,
• 1:05:29
  Speaker 6: since when to grown this kind of relationships to go
• 1:05:32
  Speaker 6: too better?
• 1:05:32
  Speaker 7: You know?
• 1:05:33
  Speaker 2: And the physic or bitter I believe this is normal. Yeah,
• 1:05:37
  Speaker 2: it is normal.
• 1:05:38
  Speaker 6: It depends again the kind of a father you have,
• 1:05:41
  Speaker 6: what kind of relationship did they have?
• 1:05:43
  Speaker 2: Also growing up?
• 1:05:44
  Speaker 6: It goes back to literally generations because unless you change
• 1:05:48
  Speaker 6: the cycle, you can decide to change the cycle. But
• 1:05:51
  Speaker 6: majority of our families, our parents have decided to go
• 1:05:54
  Speaker 6: with the same mindset that they were raised in, you know,
• 1:05:58
  Speaker 6: being tough. You know, you don't need to be friendly
• 1:06:00
  Speaker 6: with your daughter. What is your you know, charls supposed
• 1:06:04
  Speaker 6: to tell you? What are your thoughts.
• 1:06:08
  Speaker 2: Or the the cheek? Okay, but not the tipling like, no, okay,
• 1:06:15
  Speaker 2: that's too much. No, perhaps I love you, but don't
• 1:06:18
  Speaker 2: take away you know.
• 1:06:20
  Speaker 6: Do you like hate tickling maybe in general, or just
• 1:06:23
  Speaker 6: not from him, not from him, Okay, don't take away that.
• 1:06:28
  Speaker 12: All right.
• 1:06:29
  Speaker 2: They hugged me, of course, they have my dad kiss
• 1:06:32
  Speaker 2: each other on the on the peck. Yeah.
• 1:06:38
  Speaker 10: We talk about different conversations, very respectful.
• 1:06:43
  Speaker 6: Can you really talk about your relationships, maybe with your
• 1:06:47
  Speaker 6: relationship this man, he's like this.
• 1:06:50
  Speaker 2: Nice, that's nice. Definitely we have that open communication with him,
• 1:06:53
  Speaker 2: all right. Yeah, yeah, so your thoughts. I feel like
• 1:06:58
  Speaker 2: it's so lovely for me.
• 1:06:59
  Speaker 1: I'm watching at it smiling like yeah, it has some
• 1:07:05
  Speaker 1: it was like, oh this is so nice. Yeah, and
• 1:07:08
  Speaker 1: from Tapley, who wasn't like grown with the father. Sometimes
• 1:07:12
  Speaker 1: you miss this type of man. If he was here
• 1:07:15
  Speaker 1: right now, I'll be having this type of relationship with
• 1:07:19
  Speaker 1: him and stuff like that. But again, I think I've
• 1:07:21
  Speaker 1: talked about the boundaries that is there. But I feel
• 1:07:23
  Speaker 1: like this is really really I feel like people in
• 1:07:25
  Speaker 1: the comments when you read the course, because I was
• 1:07:27
  Speaker 1: looking at the comments, the people most and I feel
• 1:07:31
  Speaker 1: like some of I don't say African because I've seen good,
• 1:07:36
  Speaker 1: good relationship between family members, fathers and stuff. But there
• 1:07:40
  Speaker 1: are people who have not grown with this. So when
• 1:07:42
  Speaker 1: they see this, they're like, hmm, this could never be
• 1:07:45
  Speaker 1: my dad.
• 1:07:47
  Speaker 2: He's grown up in a family of street or street parents.
• 1:07:51
  Speaker 2: I never know poo, I've never even.
• 1:07:52
  Speaker 1: Seen their father's lave the I'm like this silly has
• 1:07:55
  Speaker 1: faces all the time.
• 1:07:57
  Speaker 2: You don't even know what I'm mis happy, what I'm sad.
• 1:08:00
  Speaker 1: This is gonna beat me if I say this. You're
• 1:08:03
  Speaker 1: very conscious around them, you know, even your mom. So
• 1:08:06
  Speaker 1: people have not seen this, who have not gotten through this,
• 1:08:09
  Speaker 1: they're like, hey, that would be my dad. And and
• 1:08:12
  Speaker 1: some people like that coming from a very strict African family,
• 1:08:17
  Speaker 1: you know. And I feel like most African families we've been.
• 1:08:20
  Speaker 8: Raised like that, Like there's a lot of strictness.
• 1:08:23
  Speaker 1: I couldn't a lot of openness when it comes too conversations.
• 1:08:26
  Speaker 1: When it comes to affection, they pole don't even tell
• 1:08:29
  Speaker 1: their parents I love you.
• 1:08:31
  Speaker 2: You know, I came as all I love.
• 1:08:33
  Speaker 1: In a cow weird you know exact LI said, right,
• 1:08:37
  Speaker 1: because he is somebody you care for, and you're supposed
• 1:08:40
  Speaker 1: to express your.
• 1:08:41
  Speaker 8: Your love with words, with affection and everything.
• 1:08:45
  Speaker 1: Without being judged out there. So I feel like it
• 1:08:48
  Speaker 1: comes also from the upbringing of a lot of people.
• 1:08:52
  Speaker 1: Most African families have not seen this. So when they
• 1:08:55
  Speaker 1: seen this from an African family, I mean on an
• 1:08:57
  Speaker 1: exposure from them, Yes, a lot of exposure. You know
• 1:09:03
  Speaker 1: when you when you when you have exposed parents, they
• 1:09:06
  Speaker 1: wouldn't like just you know, be there that they know
• 1:09:10
  Speaker 1: this is how you do this thing.
• 1:09:11
  Speaker 2: Now we did. They've seen a lot.
• 1:09:13
  Speaker 8: It's not that oh thank you, come thank if you
• 1:09:17
  Speaker 8: come on one and I grew up, nail shall go.
• 1:09:22
  Speaker 1: You never hear they've been surfing because they've not seen
• 1:09:25
  Speaker 1: a lot in life.
• 1:09:26
  Speaker 2: You know you can space.
• 1:09:30
  Speaker 9: Yeah, okay, I understand the respect. Sometimes you have to
• 1:09:35
  Speaker 9: talk about me.
• 1:09:37
  Speaker 2: I'll growing up with that. My dad and me and
• 1:09:43
  Speaker 2: the same rooms.
• 1:09:45
  Speaker 6: No more difficult TV. If he's not definitely on his phone,
• 1:09:52
  Speaker 6: it's gonna pay attention. So you're gonna put you want
• 1:09:55
  Speaker 6: to watch.
• 1:09:56
  Speaker 8: The me and now a man's used to wait TI
• 1:10:03
  Speaker 8: TV change channels and.
• 1:10:05
  Speaker 1: Then seated My mom and my other siblings bad and
• 1:10:08
  Speaker 1: my dad would be like, if then.
• 1:10:11
  Speaker 2: I'll give you know.
• 1:10:12
  Speaker 6: The mom for some reason, she used to actually stay
• 1:10:14
  Speaker 6: up late at Night with us.
• 1:10:18
  Speaker 2: Animations and before the Internet and everything.
• 1:10:23
  Speaker 6: So I used to like any new animation, putting them
• 1:10:27
  Speaker 6: all my siblings and her, because you love animation. Anation
• 1:10:31
  Speaker 6: you can collect because it's not gonna go to Sleep Company.
• 1:10:37
  Speaker 6: I'm like, yeah, that's it, but you're packing you bro,
• 1:10:42
  Speaker 6: TV go sleep man. But remember the time was really
• 1:10:44
  Speaker 6: in a bad situation with him, like he really literally
• 1:10:48
  Speaker 6: abused the ship out of me, calling hey, calm down,
• 1:10:51
  Speaker 6: meeting me talking to like lights before it was you
• 1:10:55
  Speaker 6: can't have lights or you can't have.
• 1:10:57
  Speaker 2: The TV on you have worked on.
• 1:11:02
  Speaker 8: My perps.
• 1:11:02
  Speaker 1: Was a disciplinarian, so it was like really strict, my god,
• 1:11:06
  Speaker 1: and for those dads in his good days it was
• 1:11:08
  Speaker 1: like really good.
• 1:11:09
  Speaker 8: Like really good.
• 1:11:11
  Speaker 1: He'll be like, damn, I've missed to see this side.
• 1:11:14
  Speaker 1: But in his days it was like really strict.
• 1:11:19
  Speaker 8: Paid pap corgage, you know that's him.
• 1:11:22
  Speaker 1: So everybody would ran know somerom go and then you
• 1:11:25
  Speaker 1: you take a book okay, and didn't go ahead covers
• 1:11:29
  Speaker 1: and then I had lost Angle County so if it
• 1:11:33
  Speaker 1: and I youngera our liquids and stuff and stuff like that.
• 1:11:40
  Speaker 1: So he would be like really strict to you would
• 1:11:42
  Speaker 1: like punish us in like you know, and then they're
• 1:11:46
  Speaker 1: not liqui est. At a younger age, we needed to
• 1:11:50
  Speaker 1: live with a lot of people, probably twenty houses new
• 1:11:53
  Speaker 1: by the municipal so in the whole municipal county and
• 1:11:57
  Speaker 1: then called disciplinarian.
• 1:11:59
  Speaker 2: People would come to my paths with their kids for discipline.
• 1:12:03
  Speaker 1: Sometimes it beats them their kids and the police gave
• 1:12:06
  Speaker 1: him permission to do that. So you can imagine you
• 1:12:08
  Speaker 1: were living with him, how much beatings would you get,
• 1:12:12
  Speaker 1: Like it will be like really thorough beating, Sarah, not nonuse.
• 1:12:16
  Speaker 1: I remember most times it'd be Sometimes it'd be like
• 1:12:19
  Speaker 1: you know, when he comes, everybody's just busy, like there's
• 1:12:23
  Speaker 1: just there's just there's fear that they instilled. You know what, man,
• 1:12:29
  Speaker 1: it's just some serious stuff. One minute you're laughing, happy
• 1:12:32
  Speaker 1: and then I get to pay and you are a
• 1:12:34
  Speaker 1: good So you study his moods first chair all that,
• 1:12:41
  Speaker 1: you know, But in those days, it was just.
• 1:12:45
  Speaker 8: Just serious. So I believe when you see that a
• 1:12:48
  Speaker 8: lot of people have.
• 1:12:49
  Speaker 1: Grown with the serious Afrikaans like no laughing, no doing,
• 1:12:54
  Speaker 1: you can't share, like even't happen my trips with family members.
• 1:12:59
  Speaker 1: It's really really nice. You know, you take a trip
• 1:13:02
  Speaker 1: with your family. I've seen a lot of people doing that.
• 1:13:06
  Speaker 8: Yeah, yeah, I feel like right now families.
• 1:13:14
  Speaker 1: Yeah, but again I feel like right now because we
• 1:13:17
  Speaker 1: only say this at our age. Right now, our matthers
• 1:13:21
  Speaker 1: raise their families. The way I'm gonna raise my family
• 1:13:24
  Speaker 1: is not the it's gonna be different, and the way
• 1:13:26
  Speaker 1: my kids are gonna raise their family is gonna be different.
• 1:13:29
  Speaker 8: So with our age, I feel like there's a lot
• 1:13:32
  Speaker 8: of exposure.
• 1:13:33
  Speaker 1: There's a lot of knowledge out there, so there are
• 1:13:36
  Speaker 1: things that are gonna change openness, you know. But again,
• 1:13:39
  Speaker 1: look at it from a perspective. Families we can't are
• 1:13:42
  Speaker 1: gonna be for families. But again there are a lot
• 1:13:44
  Speaker 1: of broken families. You know, at this younger age, marriages
• 1:13:47
  Speaker 1: don't last divorced, so that the same functional families. When
• 1:13:53
  Speaker 1: I'm on my uncle, we go to our really menda
• 1:13:55
  Speaker 1: out and then Rudy, you don't see the presence of
• 1:13:59
  Speaker 1: our dad. So that's also not you know, that's also
• 1:14:01
  Speaker 1: kind of dysfunctional in a way.
• 1:14:03
  Speaker 12: Yeah yeah.
• 1:14:04
  Speaker 6: But as we get closer to the na go to
• 1:14:06
  Speaker 6: the comments very quickly and see what people have to say.
• 1:14:10
  Speaker 6: So one of the comments I bumped into, which of
• 1:14:12
  Speaker 6: course made me set or made set as the topic
• 1:14:16
  Speaker 6: to maset me and the dysfunctional family, attacking the functional
• 1:14:21
  Speaker 6: family like she tried to describe this as a functional family,
• 1:14:24
  Speaker 6: literally they should be a normal and another one says
• 1:14:27
  Speaker 6: that this is uh, this is just a dad's scene
• 1:14:30
  Speaker 6: seeing his cutely baby girl a Jacobilish is grown. And
• 1:14:35
  Speaker 6: another also says what were dysfunctional families or IQ are wrong?
• 1:14:39
  Speaker 6: Another says when when her time, Jermaliza watch video. I'm
• 1:14:44
  Speaker 6: sharing your comments section Germany also say the j city
• 1:14:49
  Speaker 6: saying them please behave.
• 1:14:53
  Speaker 8: Is I don't know you.
• 1:14:57
  Speaker 6: From Junction Junu one of the god damn good times anyway, come.
• 1:15:07
  Speaker 4: B b C.
• 1:15:10
  Speaker 2: Yeah your jamaca, myn is.
• 1:15:15
  Speaker 8: That sells my sister's too.
• 1:15:22
  Speaker 1: They were but we used now to watch them, but
• 1:15:24
  Speaker 1: that was their good.
• 1:15:28
  Speaker 8: What this is I give you?
• 1:15:34
  Speaker 2: Yeah, like the beauty Rebecca, Yes, I would better o.
• 1:15:38
  Speaker 8: Mecca was now the boy and the beauty.
• 1:15:41
  Speaker 7: I remember, yeah, even my mother watching ye this.
• 1:15:52
  Speaker 2: For I knew it was oh yeah, exactly, Oh my god. Crazy.
• 1:15:58
  Speaker 2: But I also say another one says it.
• 1:16:04
  Speaker 6: When you're not sure your father daughter love, you're just
• 1:16:09
  Speaker 6: gonna tell her that, And of course the comments go, I.
• 1:16:12
  Speaker 1: Don't know as we say this, and I think we've
• 1:16:15
  Speaker 1: shared this video before, and of course we've also played
• 1:16:18
  Speaker 1: this was the Blackings frequency confession where it was so sadden,
• 1:16:23
  Speaker 1: this is what is So this guy calls this radio
• 1:16:31
  Speaker 1: woman called this girl, for example, called many right.
• 1:16:37
  Speaker 2: An, your husband has been.
• 1:16:38
  Speaker 8: Suspecting you and your dad.
• 1:16:41
  Speaker 2: Yeah, I remember, I remember.
• 1:16:43
  Speaker 8: Breaking and she was like, oh, my father does this
• 1:16:45
  Speaker 8: for me. My father does this for me.
• 1:16:47
  Speaker 2: So that's why you see some.
• 1:16:48
  Speaker 1: Kind of comments because it's also that it's also insect
• 1:16:53
  Speaker 1: that also exists. So when people see that rotten society,
• 1:16:58
  Speaker 1: it's the society that has rotten so much that people
• 1:17:01
  Speaker 1: don't even know the boundaries, don't even know what to do.
• 1:17:05
  Speaker 1: And the relationship is supposed her because that was so breaking.
• 1:17:09
  Speaker 1: They think he's talking about how she's comfortable.
• 1:17:12
  Speaker 6: She's been sleeping over her dad for the past two years,
• 1:17:15
  Speaker 6: sleeping together like like.
• 1:17:16
  Speaker 1: You know, getting intimate, Yes, and you want me, and
• 1:17:20
  Speaker 1: and he pays for a house, you know, the way
• 1:17:26
  Speaker 1: she can be up in a space where she's like,
• 1:17:27
  Speaker 1: I'm taking a trip with myself at Mombasa.
• 1:17:29
  Speaker 8: They've left the mom and then she's.
• 1:17:32
  Speaker 2: Like, among she has a boyfriend, and she has a boyfriend. Boyfriend, Yeah,
• 1:17:36
  Speaker 2: the boyfriend is not that called.
• 1:17:38
  Speaker 1: The people from the radio and the girl from the
• 1:17:41
  Speaker 1: really was recording the conversation with her, and.
• 1:17:44
  Speaker 2: She was not even like sorry shaking. She was like,
• 1:17:48
  Speaker 2: what you're going to do?
• 1:17:49
  Speaker 1: Telling my daughter I don't want him and my dad
• 1:17:52
  Speaker 1: imagine anyone started comparing.
• 1:17:54
  Speaker 8: The size of the penis. It was really bad.
• 1:17:58
  Speaker 1: So you see when people see that and videos like
• 1:18:01
  Speaker 1: this with the rotated so science or mind and perspective,
• 1:18:05
  Speaker 1: people would think it's something else.
• 1:18:06
  Speaker 8: Are genuine. Some relationships are genuine.
• 1:18:09
  Speaker 7: Some parents show.
• 1:18:10
  Speaker 1: Love, showcase love. I feel like people in this video,
• 1:18:13
  Speaker 1: I feel like she's just growing up. It's like to
• 1:18:14
  Speaker 1: be shy like but you know, the father's really see
• 1:18:19
  Speaker 1: as they're small guys. Have you ever you've never seen
• 1:18:21
  Speaker 1: that broken father come to your father and I don't
• 1:18:24
  Speaker 1: lessen and you're pregnant.
• 1:18:25
  Speaker 8: That man will cry. They they're like, you wanna who
• 1:18:28
  Speaker 8: spoil my daughter? And that's how you find a lot
• 1:18:30
  Speaker 8: of people go to preason.
• 1:18:31
  Speaker 1: Yeah, the fathers whill appressed this man because it's like,
• 1:18:35
  Speaker 1: you spoil my little girl.
• 1:18:37
  Speaker 8: You know, this is my baby for life. So the
• 1:18:39
  Speaker 8: father has that perspective, this is my exactly very predictive.
• 1:18:45
  Speaker 10: That's streat Yeah, like I've seen that now like is
• 1:18:56
  Speaker 10: like too much and the factor or a girl growing
• 1:19:01
  Speaker 10: up with important.
• 1:19:04
  Speaker 2: I understand you.
• 1:19:08
  Speaker 6: And I feel like for me as you wind up
• 1:19:13
  Speaker 6: what I learned out from my dysfunctional family first time,
• 1:19:17
  Speaker 6: I'm growing up of course with my mom then coming
• 1:19:19
  Speaker 6: to me to my dad later and seeing my mom's
• 1:19:23
  Speaker 6: relationship my body already know they kind of man, I
• 1:19:26
  Speaker 6: want a man who's putting his hands on me, Like
• 1:19:28
  Speaker 6: he said, I don't need a man who's disrespecting me.
• 1:19:31
  Speaker 2: I don't need a man who actually cannot or is
• 1:19:35
  Speaker 2: gonna question my work. Yeah, you know make me feel
• 1:19:38
  Speaker 2: some type of way.
• 1:19:42
  Speaker 6: Exactly, I'm not gonna allow any man who's gonna make
• 1:19:45
  Speaker 6: me feelings.
• 1:19:46
  Speaker 2: You are actually very sure about you because what is
• 1:19:51
  Speaker 2: and I've learned also you can.
• 1:19:54
  Speaker 6: Walk away out of something that is not benefiting you.
• 1:19:56
  Speaker 6: You know, at any given time, literally you it's not
• 1:20:00
  Speaker 6: mass see, it's not a situation what was in till
• 1:20:05
  Speaker 6: that doors a part. Not when you're being abused, you know,
• 1:20:10
  Speaker 6: not when somebody is restreating you. You're not there to
• 1:20:12
  Speaker 6: be a baby bear around just living bad. You know,
• 1:20:16
  Speaker 6: you you had your life going on, you had your
• 1:20:18
  Speaker 6: ship going on. I love keep on saying. Any woman
• 1:20:22
  Speaker 6: who gives back to not talk that she's going she
• 1:20:24
  Speaker 6: should not stop being sasa. You stop looking beautiful. You
• 1:20:28
  Speaker 6: should not still stop looking sexy, not to actually like
• 1:20:31
  Speaker 6: attracted the men or to be disrespectful to your partner.
• 1:20:35
  Speaker 6: But it's because you're ship okay, and you should act
• 1:20:37
  Speaker 6: like you're still the ship. You know, you still actually
• 1:20:40
  Speaker 6: still maintain yourself.
• 1:20:41
  Speaker 2: In relationships and show this man and again not to
• 1:20:45
  Speaker 2: be disrespectful with or without you.
• 1:20:47
  Speaker 9: I can you know like that exactly to basically raise
• 1:20:53
  Speaker 9: your energy.
• 1:20:55
  Speaker 6: Yeah, so that's what I learned, I think majority from
• 1:20:57
  Speaker 6: my mom's relationship and same meeting my dad.
• 1:20:59
  Speaker 2: I so the type of men literally.
• 1:21:01
  Speaker 6: We have outside and the type of mindset we have,
• 1:21:05
  Speaker 6: especially from our parents who have grown up with the same.
• 1:21:08
  Speaker 6: Because I say, with my dad's being raised devo. Because
• 1:21:11
  Speaker 6: I've met my grandma. My grandma into two very very rowdy,
• 1:21:16
  Speaker 6: like very very roundy like mother say grandchild friend's vigility
• 1:21:21
  Speaker 6: doesn't give up about grandchildress really grandmother's like about this
• 1:21:27
  Speaker 6: is come person, come on, you let your not help friends.
• 1:21:32
  Speaker 8: I want to give the last time.
• 1:21:33
  Speaker 6: The last time I had that call, literally my grandma
• 1:21:36
  Speaker 6: was about money. I'm like, bro, I want you to
• 1:21:38
  Speaker 6: try to have a talk with your son. You know
• 1:21:40
  Speaker 6: you can't be this and this and this when this
• 1:21:44
  Speaker 6: and this and this is spending. Can you try to
• 1:21:46
  Speaker 6: have a discussion with your son why I left home?
• 1:21:48
  Speaker 6: Once you have the first can't talk to me about
• 1:21:50
  Speaker 6: one to three things? No, you know, forget you know
• 1:21:53
  Speaker 6: you should send me money. I'm hungry, you know five
• 1:21:56
  Speaker 6: foundland this is gonna be.
• 1:21:57
  Speaker 2: Enough at all? You reason the Colley.
• 1:22:02
  Speaker 6: So I learned a lot from both my parents from
• 1:22:05
  Speaker 6: a dysfunctional family. Personally, of course, I want to have
• 1:22:07
  Speaker 6: a functional family. I wanna have my marriage together and
• 1:22:11
  Speaker 6: understand my kids and listen to my kids. I wanna
• 1:22:14
  Speaker 6: I've seen something to do with teic ten half kids.
• 1:22:17
  Speaker 6: When you're ready, Oh my god, you know, Memona, when
• 1:22:23
  Speaker 6: I'm safe Learney, it's like a teenage growing girl.
• 1:22:26
  Speaker 2: I don't know if it's an act, but it looks
• 1:22:28
  Speaker 2: so really. Even if it's an art, I believe this
• 1:22:30
  Speaker 2: is happening in reality.
• 1:22:32
  Speaker 6: A teenage girl, and of course understanding those families are
• 1:22:34
  Speaker 6: also grown up again functional, but you can give your
• 1:22:37
  Speaker 6: daughter a phone, they can use a phone, you know,
• 1:22:39
  Speaker 6: having their own space, because I wanna grow of this
• 1:22:42
  Speaker 6: restriction of don't don't, don't don't. But teenagers will always
• 1:22:46
  Speaker 6: be teenagers. They're gonna go where you don't want them
• 1:22:48
  Speaker 6: to go.
• 1:22:49
  Speaker 2: So apparently this teenager has a boyfriend, an online boyfriend.
• 1:22:53
  Speaker 2: It's on. My boyfriend called her.
• 1:22:56
  Speaker 6: When the dad was there, so she was not picking
• 1:22:58
  Speaker 6: because the dad actually is the price and right now,
• 1:23:01
  Speaker 6: so when she picked up the phone, because she was
• 1:23:03
  Speaker 6: bringing too much.
• 1:23:03
  Speaker 2: Now, Lisa figure, the guide.
• 1:23:06
  Speaker 6: On, my boyfriend is very aggressive? Why did you out
• 1:23:08
  Speaker 6: my cause? So the guy says, hold on, hold on,
• 1:23:12
  Speaker 6: hold on? Who's talking to you like that? Why are
• 1:23:15
  Speaker 6: you allowing someone to talk to you so aggressively? This
• 1:23:18
  Speaker 6: is not I'm raising you. I'm raising you to have
• 1:23:21
  Speaker 6: men who are going to literally understand your word.
• 1:23:24
  Speaker 2: You know, someone who's why why don't someone to talk
• 1:23:28
  Speaker 2: to you?
• 1:23:28
  Speaker 6: This is peple She laughs words. She of course says,
• 1:23:32
  Speaker 6: it's an online boyfriend. And I'm trying to look at
• 1:23:35
  Speaker 6: the patients because I went to the comments it's the
• 1:23:37
  Speaker 6: patient that this guy has. Because I did middlish when
• 1:23:40
  Speaker 6: I see that to explain why she has an online boyfriend.
• 1:23:44
  Speaker 2: She was not making sense.
• 1:23:46
  Speaker 6: And the way the guy is calling repeated repeated, because
• 1:23:49
  Speaker 6: it's repeated online, he's repeatedly calling.
• 1:23:52
  Speaker 2: And this guy, I'm the dad. You can't talk to
• 1:23:55
  Speaker 2: my daughter this way.
• 1:23:56
  Speaker 6: I don't know you, you know so because I hadn't
• 1:23:59
  Speaker 6: ask her the address, maybe because of address she said no.
• 1:24:04
  Speaker 7: So it's the patience.
• 1:24:05
  Speaker 2: And it reminded me of when you want to be
• 1:24:08
  Speaker 2: your parents.
• 1:24:09
  Speaker 6: You have to have that patience because I'm like, god, damn,
• 1:24:14
  Speaker 6: probably big. And I was trying to put myself in
• 1:24:17
  Speaker 6: this Saul, like, hey, but she's just a child.
• 1:24:20
  Speaker 1: She's just trying to explain. And this is why you
• 1:24:22
  Speaker 1: need to be ready to have kids, very protective.
• 1:24:24
  Speaker 2: You want to be ready, you know.
• 1:24:28
  Speaker 6: So I've learned a lot personally, of course, and I've
• 1:24:30
  Speaker 6: still learning even even in my relationships literally because you
• 1:24:34
  Speaker 6: get better as you grow. Literally, because if you try
• 1:24:37
  Speaker 6: to maybe our past relationship, your first relationship.
• 1:24:40
  Speaker 2: The guys I had not but once you want nothing
• 1:24:43
  Speaker 2: to do with your ex they not look at your type.
• 1:24:45
  Speaker 2: You know, you want better and better every single day.
• 1:24:48
  Speaker 2: So I'm literally aiming and know the kind of id
• 1:24:53
  Speaker 2: men I wanted to and be with.
• 1:24:56
  Speaker 12: Period.
• 1:24:57
  Speaker 2: Yeah. So those are my clothes and remarks. Literally take
• 1:24:59
  Speaker 2: care remembered that.
• 1:25:04
  Speaker 9: And nalinated right.
• 1:25:07
  Speaker 1: My clothing remark is that you write your own page.
• 1:25:11
  Speaker 1: You raise your kids the way you want. We are
• 1:25:15
  Speaker 1: very knowledgeable, we are very exposed out here.
• 1:25:19
  Speaker 8: We've seen a lot.
• 1:25:20
  Speaker 1: Despite of you having a very bad relationship or bad
• 1:25:24
  Speaker 1: dis or a dysfunctional family, it doesn't have to be
• 1:25:27
  Speaker 1: that that is what you know. You can have a
• 1:25:29
  Speaker 1: functional family, decided what you want, and raise your kids
• 1:25:34
  Speaker 1: in the best way that you feel.
• 1:25:37
  Speaker 8: You know, don't really the way.
• 1:25:39
  Speaker 6: I think the right one is to see the better
• 1:25:42
  Speaker 6: version of you. You you know, growing up, I believe
• 1:25:47
  Speaker 6: mistake finding, but I didn't mind the better version of them.
• 1:25:55
  Speaker 1: I think you because when they say of me, probably
• 1:25:59
  Speaker 1: you know the parents who want now because I felt this,
• 1:26:02
  Speaker 1: they push their parents.
• 1:26:05
  Speaker 2: What you did wrong? Yeah?
• 1:26:08
  Speaker 6: Yeah, yeah, like I'm a place to younger exactly.
• 1:26:15
  Speaker 1: And that's why it goes back to I mean I
• 1:26:19
  Speaker 1: always say, listen, I'm working all this for me and
• 1:26:22
  Speaker 1: my kids and my next because I want a better
• 1:26:25
  Speaker 1: life for them. If there are things that need meant
• 1:26:28
  Speaker 1: to do as a child, I want my kids to
• 1:26:31
  Speaker 1: have the best, you know, so he said, every day
• 1:26:34
  Speaker 1: one want the best for your kids. How you raise them,
• 1:26:37
  Speaker 1: how you treat them, how you provide for them. Always
• 1:26:40
  Speaker 1: give the best that you can give. As a chi,
• 1:26:43
  Speaker 1: I feel like you grow and I want to give
• 1:26:45
  Speaker 1: to your mom.
• 1:26:46
  Speaker 6: I make your mom feel like feels like a really
• 1:26:49
  Speaker 6: proud parents yeah, really responsible, Yeah, feeling very shitty like.
• 1:26:58
  Speaker 7: Yeah.
• 1:26:59
  Speaker 2: It goes to also them the way they were raised.
• 1:27:01
  Speaker 6: Yeah, so of course change that with you what you're
• 1:27:05
  Speaker 6: going to see in your child, even for them when
• 1:27:07
  Speaker 6: they grow and as you grow, as they grow older,
• 1:27:10
  Speaker 6: as you grow older, you become super proud of yourself
• 1:27:13
  Speaker 6: for being mom.
• 1:27:14
  Speaker 2: You see. Mom's actually I love I love as a
• 1:27:18
  Speaker 2: mom and as a brand.
• 1:27:19
  Speaker 7: Yeah.
• 1:27:20
  Speaker 6: I love the way of her mind expresses her love
• 1:27:22
  Speaker 6: for her child. The sun number the sun for as like,
• 1:27:27
  Speaker 6: it's all there. You know, I'm making the world know
• 1:27:30
  Speaker 6: I love you and you shouldn't be ashamed to be
• 1:27:32
  Speaker 6: my son and to be you know, me being your
• 1:27:35
  Speaker 6: mother and some.
• 1:27:36
  Speaker 8: Kind of relationship personally.
• 1:27:38
  Speaker 2: An example, my dad told me so many dark or nugget,
• 1:27:43
  Speaker 2: and I was like, you guys for real, com even nevi.
• 1:27:48
  Speaker 6: So that should actually not be what is normalized. You
• 1:27:52
  Speaker 6: should have this kind of openness of love.
• 1:27:56
  Speaker 7: Should be.
• 1:27:58
  Speaker 6: You know, showing the love to you, your sons. We
• 1:28:00
  Speaker 6: should be people should know I love my son, I
• 1:28:02
  Speaker 6: love my shouldn't even you know.
• 1:28:04
  Speaker 1: I've seen a society of people now doubting this kind
• 1:28:07
  Speaker 1: it's supposed to be a norm way.
• 1:28:08
  Speaker 8: It's like, oh, that's just love.
• 1:28:11
  Speaker 6: Why we have really happy grandparents to be specific, very happy.
• 1:28:20
  Speaker 2: Yeah, not even that one of them as a couple
• 1:28:23
  Speaker 2: being together.
• 1:28:25
  Speaker 6: That was I think in twenty twenty, I went to
• 1:28:27
  Speaker 6: one of these two grandmys Land and I saw nothing
• 1:28:32
  Speaker 6: but love at old age.
• 1:28:34
  Speaker 2: Like you guys are so loud as your age, I'm
• 1:28:38
  Speaker 2: telling you child like mentality. But I saw love.
• 1:28:43
  Speaker 6: And also apart from love, I saw their love that
• 1:28:46
  Speaker 6: they have between them, and that the children despite them
• 1:28:51
  Speaker 6: who was there, and their grandchildren, like there's just extension
• 1:28:55
  Speaker 6: of nothing but just laughter and love.
• 1:28:57
  Speaker 8: That's what it also goes back. I think we've about
• 1:29:00
  Speaker 8: this up bringing.
• 1:29:01
  Speaker 1: You see how you're bringing everybody that is the same
• 1:29:04
  Speaker 1: way your kids are gonna bring.
• 1:29:05
  Speaker 2: Their kids and that is the same way.
• 1:29:07
  Speaker 1: Yeah, it goes back because if you're that strict person
• 1:29:10
  Speaker 1: on your script, that is what they do, and that
• 1:29:12
  Speaker 1: the bard.
• 1:29:12
  Speaker 2: If you're like bringing even sometimes there are things you.
• 1:29:15
  Speaker 1: Do and you're like, this is just what my mom
• 1:29:17
  Speaker 1: would do, but this is just my mommy me, or
• 1:29:19
  Speaker 1: this is just this, you know. So it all goes
• 1:29:22
  Speaker 1: back to up bringing. How you up bring your child,
• 1:29:25
  Speaker 1: how you nature your child, that is what they'll become.
• 1:29:28
  Speaker 1: If you want them to be the best version, nature
• 1:29:30
  Speaker 1: them in the best way that you can, and.
• 1:29:32
  Speaker 6: Also feel like they die happy, like most of the
• 1:29:34
  Speaker 6: people who are really functional, family is still the end.
• 1:29:37
  Speaker 6: Like if these two couples are comet like, they die
• 1:29:44
  Speaker 6: happy personally. I want to give an example to my
• 1:29:47
  Speaker 6: late auntie who passed away last year.
• 1:29:50
  Speaker 2: And I remember when went to the battle. I've never
• 1:29:52
  Speaker 2: seen pain in a man like.
• 1:29:53
  Speaker 6: I saw the pain in my uncle's face, like, I've
• 1:29:56
  Speaker 6: never seen pain like that in a man like because
• 1:29:59
  Speaker 6: of them lose someone they love no more.
• 1:30:01
  Speaker 2: You don't know many you know because they find.
• 1:30:03
  Speaker 8: Out so good.
• 1:30:04
  Speaker 6: But this guy really broke down expressing how much love
• 1:30:08
  Speaker 6: he had for our aunt.
• 1:30:11
  Speaker 2: And literally how she was just everything.
• 1:30:15
  Speaker 1: It was.
• 1:30:15
  Speaker 2: It was just something amazing.
• 1:30:16
  Speaker 6: And I'm like, come on, because the love even when
• 1:30:20
  Speaker 6: she was sick, you could see there. Imagine you're being
• 1:30:22
  Speaker 6: sick and having a person when a washer moving and
• 1:30:26
  Speaker 6: policia anything like he took park or so like, it's
• 1:30:29
  Speaker 6: super super amazing, you know. But anyway, as exist, guys,
• 1:30:33
  Speaker 6: it is there. I keep on telling these people from
• 1:30:35
  Speaker 6: Black on Fire, John was busially here. Their love is there. Literally,
• 1:30:40
  Speaker 6: you know, you just need to get the right people,
• 1:30:42
  Speaker 6: the right person who belongs to you know, the right people,
• 1:30:45
  Speaker 6: the person who belongs to you. But your ads as
• 1:30:48
  Speaker 6: wind up. I turned out all right after a bad asstack.
• 1:30:51
  Speaker 6: But I wouldn't entirely blame that on my family. They
• 1:30:54
  Speaker 6: did the best with what they knew and had. I agree,
• 1:30:58
  Speaker 6: But yeah, I agree, you actually can't be more parents
• 1:31:00
  Speaker 6: because that's what they knew best. Like they didn't know
• 1:31:03
  Speaker 6: we had an option thinking otherwise I can be a
• 1:31:06
  Speaker 6: softer parent.
• 1:31:07
  Speaker 2: You know, they just knew nothing but just being harsh
• 1:31:10
  Speaker 2: and all that. But we had we had, you.
• 1:31:16
  Speaker 5: Know.
• 1:31:16
  Speaker 6: Jobs also says all families have some form of dysfunction.
• 1:31:20
  Speaker 6: No family is perfect.
• 1:31:23
  Speaker 2: Agree.
• 1:31:23
  Speaker 8: Agree.
• 1:31:24
  Speaker 6: I also say you say it says the last one
• 1:31:26
  Speaker 6: is that life has a way of balancing you out
• 1:31:29
  Speaker 6: to bring the best out of you. So what you
• 1:31:31
  Speaker 6: call this trap dysfunction could just be let me get
• 1:31:36
  Speaker 6: that a little bit, just a minute, could just be
• 1:31:40
  Speaker 6: a little trying to bring the best out of you,
• 1:31:43
  Speaker 6: if I'm got that correct. But anyway, family, we're coming
• 1:31:48
  Speaker 6: to the end of today's conversation. This has been there
• 1:31:50
  Speaker 6: to bonet of course with us the three musketiers. Today
• 1:31:53
  Speaker 6: literally today we don't have the male figures in the house,
• 1:31:57
  Speaker 6: but because well presented show.
• 1:32:02
  Speaker 1: That's a that's a nice one's been a dysfunctioned.
• 1:32:10
  Speaker 8: We had the men here.
• 1:32:11
  Speaker 6: Yeah, we geral shout to also missed the black of fire.
• 1:32:15
  Speaker 6: Shout to everyone rate classic on the TikTok page and
• 1:32:20
  Speaker 6: everyone on the website as well. So a couple of
• 1:32:22
  Speaker 6: members of you guys love to actually normalize commenting. I've
• 1:32:26
  Speaker 6: also beautiful day, See you guys tomorrow.
• 1:32:29
  Speaker 7: Peace.
• 1:32:32
  Speaker 12: Yeah, showing.
• 1:33:00
  Speaker 2: That for press. I got.
• 1:33:04
  Speaker 1: The boy.
• 1:33:07
  Speaker 2: Boy, can you get it?
• 1:33:21
  Speaker 12: You don't before you getting to be easily?
• 1:33:24
  Speaker 2: Can I go to this Yeah, okay, that's yeah.