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Adam Bilinski - Raising Good Men With Values · Quarterback DadCast | Intentional Fatherhood & Leadership at Home

• 0:03
  SPEAKER_03: Hi, I'm Riley, and I'm Ryder.
• 0:05
  SPEAKER_03: And this is my dad's job.
• 0:13
  SPEAKER_03: Hey everybody, it's Casey J Cox with the Quarterback Dadcast.
• 0:16
  SPEAKER_03: Welcome to season six, and I cannot be more excited to have you join me for another year of fantastic episodes of Conversations with unscripted and raw and authentic conversations with dads.
• 0:26
  SPEAKER_03: If you're new to this podcast, really it's simple.
• 0:28
  SPEAKER_03: It's a podcast where we interview dads, we learn about how they were raised, we learn about the life lessons that were important to them, we learn about the values that are important to them, and really we learn about how we can work hard to become a better quarterback or leader of our home.
• 0:41
  SPEAKER_03: So let's sit back, relax, and listen to today's episode of the Quarterback Deckcast.
• 0:45
  SPEAKER_03: Wait everybody, it's KCJ Cox with the Quarterback Deckcats Weird.
• 0:49
  SPEAKER_03: Now it's tail end of season six.
• 0:51
  SPEAKER_03: And I want to say thank you to all um every dad or mom or grandma and grandpa whoever continues to listen for your support.
• 0:59
  SPEAKER_03: It means the world to me.
• 1:00
  SPEAKER_03: And I know we're uh we're uh episode 300 and something uh when this comes out, uh, but the goal is to get to a thousand, and so which means we're not gonna be doing this thing.
• 1:10
  SPEAKER_03: We're not we're gonna be continuing to do this thing for a long time, which I'm very, very excited about.
• 1:14
  SPEAKER_03: And our next guest, well, he was hard to get.
• 1:16
  SPEAKER_03: You know, I went through multiple agents, um, I I had to go through like meet him in an alley, and he finally agreed.
• 1:23
  SPEAKER_03: Uh, joke him aside, his name is Adam Bolinski.
• 1:25
  SPEAKER_03: He's a senior executive client partner at the wonderful Ronstadt.
• 1:29
  SPEAKER_03: He's been there over 26 years.
• 1:30
  SPEAKER_03: He's a Buffalo Bull, he's a diehard Rams fan.
• 1:33
  SPEAKER_03: Uh, but more importantly, he's a dad.
• 1:35
  SPEAKER_03: And we're gonna learn from Adam how he's working hard to become that ultimate or quarterback leader of his household.
• 1:39
  SPEAKER_03: So without further ado, Mr.
• 1:40
  SPEAKER_03: Balinski, welcome to the quarterback dad cast.
• 1:43
  SPEAKER_03: Hey, appreciate it, Casey.
• 1:44
  SPEAKER_03: Thanks for having me.
• 1:45
  SPEAKER_03: How about that intro?
• 1:47
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah, it's pretty good.
• 1:48
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
• 1:49
  SPEAKER_02: I I was wondering if I could just copy that for the next 10 things I need for work when they ask me for an intro.
• 1:55
  SPEAKER_03: There we go.
• 1:57
  SPEAKER_03: So, uh, when's the last time someone mentioned that you're a Buffalo bull?
• 2:02
  SPEAKER_03: Kyle 20 years.
• 2:04
  SPEAKER_03: Go bulls, baby.
• 2:06
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah, you know, a uh undrafted free agent out of UB uh had a great game for the Rams this weekend started.
• 2:13
  SPEAKER_03: Oh, really?
• 2:14
  SPEAKER_02: Luck, yeah.
• 2:15
  SPEAKER_03: There we go.
• 2:16
  SPEAKER_03: Trivia right there, everybody.
• 2:18
  SPEAKER_02: Remember, Mr.
• 2:18
  SPEAKER_02: Cole Mack came out of Buffalo, so that you know they got a couple players.
• 2:23
  SPEAKER_03: Nice.
• 2:24
  SPEAKER_03: Well, brother, we always start out with each uh each episode gratitude.
• 2:27
  SPEAKER_03: So tell me, what are you most grateful for as a dad today?
• 2:31
  SPEAKER_03: That I am a dad.
• 2:32
  SPEAKER_03: The fact that I get to be a dad.
• 2:35
  SPEAKER_02: Um, and the fact that I got a wife who loves me.
• 2:37
  SPEAKER_02: Like I said, uh I'm not joking when I tell you I'm living the dream, pal.
• 2:41
  SPEAKER_02: I got the white picket fence, the golden retriever, the two boys, the wife who loves me, and a great job.
• 2:46
  SPEAKER_02: I am live LTD.
• 2:48
  SPEAKER_03: There we go.
• 2:49
  SPEAKER_03: Funny story about that.
• 2:50
  SPEAKER_03: When my wife and I first got married, our first house was a yellow, yellow house with a white picket fence, and we had a golden retriever, and I took the fence down.
• 2:57
  SPEAKER_03: I'm like, I can't, there's too many cliches.
• 2:58
  SPEAKER_03: We got to put up a new fence.
• 3:00
  SPEAKER_03: True story.
• 3:02
  SPEAKER_03: Um, well, what I'm most grateful for, um, I'm grateful for uh the Seattle Mariners today because uh it's it gives me something greatly to talk about with my son and my daughter, who's now becoming even a better Seattle Mariner fan.
• 3:16
  SPEAKER_03: But uh we're recording in uh October.
• 3:19
  SPEAKER_03: This episode will come out here, I say, within the next month.
• 3:22
  SPEAKER_03: And uh we're gonna get together today with uh friends and and watch the game.
• 3:25
  SPEAKER_03: And uh hopefully by the by the time this episode comes out, you're gonna be looking at the World Series champs and this beloved biker bar, handlebar mustache will be gone.
• 3:36
  SPEAKER_01: Well, I wish you the best of luck.
• 3:38
  SPEAKER_01: Now that the Yankees are out, fine, let's go Seattle.
• 3:42
  SPEAKER_03: There we go.
• 3:43
  SPEAKER_03: There we go.
• 3:44
  SPEAKER_03: Well, bring me inside the the uh Balinski huddle.
• 3:47
  SPEAKER_03: I'd love to learn how you and your wife met and then talk about each member of uh the squad.
• 3:51
  SPEAKER_02: Sure.
• 3:52
  SPEAKER_02: Uh, you know, it's right out of the fairy tale.
• 3:55
  SPEAKER_02: Uh we I met her on the math league bus.
• 3:58
  SPEAKER_02: I asked her cousin if I could get her phone number.
• 4:01
  SPEAKER_02: Her cousin said nope.
• 4:03
  SPEAKER_02: Uh, you know, I was two years older than her at the time.
• 4:06
  SPEAKER_02: We dated for all of two weeks in ninth grade, uh, but realized maybe we weren't mature enough yet.
• 4:12
  SPEAKER_02: Stayed close friends.
• 4:13
  SPEAKER_02: Uh, she went and told her mother after our two weeks, this is the boy I'm gonna marry.
• 4:17
  SPEAKER_02: Uh, her mother wrote it down so we'd remember uh throughout high school, she was one of my best friends.
• 4:23
  SPEAKER_02: Um throughout college, she came and visited me, one of my best friends.
• 4:27
  SPEAKER_02: Uh, you know, I had the typical mentality that um this was someone I really liked, appreciated, but no way I'm good enough for her.
• 4:34
  SPEAKER_02: Uh, you know, she was the the pedestal.
• 4:37
  SPEAKER_02: Uh and then after uh we graduated college, uh, about two weeks into my uh summer before we moved to New York City, uh, I had uh told her we should be dating.
• 4:48
  SPEAKER_02: And she said, I have a boyfriend.
• 4:49
  SPEAKER_02: I said, Don't worry, I'll let him know it's over.
• 4:52
  SPEAKER_02: I was quite confident young man, and we did the next year and a half long distance where we moved to New York City together and you know, started that wild dream.
• 4:59
  SPEAKER_02: And here we are 26 years later with two wonderful boys and everything going up pretty good.
• 5:04
  SPEAKER_03: Wow.
• 5:05
  SPEAKER_03: And and talk about the boys.
• 5:07
  SPEAKER_03: What are they up to in their ages?
• 5:08
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah, so I have a 17-year-old senior uh and a 16-year-old now sophomore.
• 5:15
  SPEAKER_02: Uh, they're about 18 months apart, they couldn't be any more different than any two kids in the world.
• 5:20
  SPEAKER_02: Um, fortunately, they're both at the same school now.
• 5:24
  SPEAKER_02: Uh, they go to a prep school.
• 5:26
  SPEAKER_02: And uh my oldest is finishing up his college applications in the next two weeks and hopefully uh have that all settled by uh the end of the year because he is going to be going uh early uh what's it early attention, early, what's it called?
• 5:41
  SPEAKER_02: Um and then the youngest decided he did not want to be known as just a football player, and so really made this pivot to the academic institution.
• 5:52
  SPEAKER_02: But they're both on the same varsity prep football team, and it's you know quite a joy uh as a father to see them both out there.
• 6:00
  SPEAKER_02: Um my youngest doesn't take a step off the field both sides.
• 6:03
  SPEAKER_02: He's an Iron Man, he's he's a machine, and the uh the oldest is an intellect, and so um he he probably only gets you know maybe 20% of the time, but boy does he make it uh worthwhile.
• 6:15
  SPEAKER_02: He's fast, it's fun.
• 6:16
  SPEAKER_02: So, as a father, what do you do?
• 6:17
  SPEAKER_02: You root out there, you keep your mouth shut and say no injuries, no injuries.
• 6:21
  SPEAKER_02: Right, exactly.
• 6:21
  SPEAKER_02: Exactly.
• 6:22
  SPEAKER_02: Great sportsmanship is all I've ever asked for them.
• 6:24
  SPEAKER_02: You know, I've said all the cliches, I think I'm familiar.
• 6:28
  SPEAKER_02: I coached them until they were eight and you know, made it clear that you know the only thing I can ask of you is what you can control.
• 6:34
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah, um, I don't care if you score a hundred goals, I don't care if you catch a hundred passes, but you better do it with the right attitude, the right demeanor.
• 6:41
  SPEAKER_02: You better treat everybody with respect.
• 6:43
  SPEAKER_02: Um, and it's paying off.
• 6:45
  SPEAKER_02: You know, I do appreciate the pats on the back from his teammates, his coaches, from all of them on how they treat people and how they act.
• 6:52
  SPEAKER_02: And so, you know, there's another proud factor.
• 6:55
  SPEAKER_02: I think it's gonna come out a few times today in our our discussion, how proud I am.
• 6:59
  SPEAKER_02: Oh, yeah.
• 7:00
  SPEAKER_03: Love that.
• 7:01
  SPEAKER_03: Love that.
• 7:03
  SPEAKER_03: Uh and your wife, does she stay home and and control the the run the roost, or does she work too?
• 7:10
  SPEAKER_03: Does she have uh corporate job?
• 7:12
  SPEAKER_02: Had uh our first child in 2008.
• 7:14
  SPEAKER_02: Uh we were had that magical dream that we were gonna try to raise in the city.
• 7:19
  SPEAKER_02: Um, realized, you know, six months before the baby was born, that's just not, we're not doing that.
• 7:23
  SPEAKER_02: So I started building a house up here in upstate New York, Saratoga Springs, New York area.
• 7:28
  SPEAKER_02: Um, and she retired uh a week after we had the baby.
• 7:33
  SPEAKER_02: Uh, I came home for a week, moved them into the house, and then I decided to commute for the next 12 years, the three hours from upstate New York to New York City.
• 7:41
  SPEAKER_02: I'd leave every Tuesday morning, come home every Thursday night or Friday morning.
• 7:46
  SPEAKER_02: Um, worked out well.
• 7:48
  SPEAKER_02: She started, you know, getting a little antsy and she's quite talented.
• 7:52
  SPEAKER_02: So she did some marketing for a law firm.
• 7:55
  SPEAKER_02: She did some substitute teaching, and then it started to expand, expand, expand.
• 7:58
  SPEAKER_02: So she's got a small business for kind of SEO marketing, how to make it to when you search for a lawyer, they're the first one on the websites, things like that.
• 8:06
  SPEAKER_02: A lot of smaller businesses that might get gobbled up by the big Googles of the world.
• 8:10
  SPEAKER_02: She'll teach them how to utilize the tricks of the trade so they don't have to pay$12,000 a month to do it the right way.
• 8:16
  SPEAKER_02: Um, and so she probably got like seven or eight of those.
• 8:19
  SPEAKER_02: She still substitute teaches for the fun of it.
• 8:21
  SPEAKER_02: You know, we have nieces and nephews in the area, so she will make it a point to try to be the substitute teacher for them so she gets to spend more time with them.
• 8:29
  SPEAKER_02: She still does some uh volunteer work.
• 8:31
  SPEAKER_02: We're pretty big advocates for uh Operation Smile.
• 8:35
  SPEAKER_02: Um, our youngest was born with a minor cleft lip, introduced us into that world, and we decided that, hey, let's go all in.
• 8:42
  SPEAKER_02: And uh he wears it like a badge of courage.
• 8:44
  SPEAKER_02: He's raised uh almost$65,000 already for it.
• 8:48
  SPEAKER_02: And every year we did it until he was about seven or eight, and now it's every other year we have a you know an event, you know, live music, fun stuff, get all the friends together.
• 8:57
  SPEAKER_02: Um, so she continues to make the world a better place.
• 9:01
  SPEAKER_03: Wow, that's awesome, man.
• 9:03
  SPEAKER_03: Um well, Mr.
• 9:05
  SPEAKER_03: Balinski, take me back to what was life like growing up for you, and I'd love to learn about mom and dad and the impact they had on you now that you're a father.
• 9:13
  SPEAKER_04: Sure.
• 9:14
  SPEAKER_02: Um well, my mom is my rock.
• 9:18
  SPEAKER_02: Um, I my parents divorced when I was probably one.
• 9:22
  SPEAKER_02: Um, didn't get to really know my dad that well.
• 9:25
  SPEAKER_02: Of course, had the weekend visitation and stuff like that.
• 9:28
  SPEAKER_02: Um by the time I was 14, pretty much stopped seeing him.
• 9:34
  SPEAKER_02: Um by 15, definitely wasn't seeing him anymore.
• 9:38
  SPEAKER_02: Uh, and was very fortunate because my mom was the rock.
• 9:42
  SPEAKER_02: I never knew we were poor.
• 9:44
  SPEAKER_02: Um, there's always a funny story.
• 9:46
  SPEAKER_02: Just probably had to be about 10 years ago.
• 9:48
  SPEAKER_02: I had a pork chop with a nice bone at a restaurant, you know, it was excellent.
• 9:52
  SPEAKER_02: And I cut it all off and I handed my mom the bone, and she looked at me and goes, What the hell are you doing?
• 9:56
  SPEAKER_02: I said, You love the bones.
• 9:58
  SPEAKER_02: I remember growing up, you always ate the bones.
• 10:00
  SPEAKER_02: She pushed it back at me.
• 10:01
  SPEAKER_02: She goes, You idiot.
• 10:02
  SPEAKER_02: It's because we couldn't afford a second pork chop.
• 10:05
  SPEAKER_02: That's what I had to eat.
• 10:06
  SPEAKER_02: And I did not know that for what, 30 something years, that it finally clicked, like, this is what your mom does, this is what parents do for you.
• 10:13
  SPEAKER_02: Um, so my mom is everything.
• 10:16
  SPEAKER_02: She's the rock.
• 10:17
  SPEAKER_02: I was fortunate though that my mom's father, my grandfather, and one of my mom's brother, my uncle, really took a parental lead for me.
• 10:27
  SPEAKER_02: I was able to go to work at 14 years old at a mechanical contracting facility and learn the importance of hard work.
• 10:34
  SPEAKER_02: Um, and I think that's, you know, a lot of what I can attribute my success for today is I'll tell you, I'm not the smartest guy in the room, but I'll outwork you.
• 10:42
  SPEAKER_02: Uh, and that's what got me through New York City those first few years.
• 10:46
  SPEAKER_02: Wow.
• 10:47
  SPEAKER_02: And what did mom do for a job?
• 10:50
  SPEAKER_02: Geez, what didn't she do?
• 10:52
  SPEAKER_02: Um, you know, she was basically a homemaker for all I ever remember.
• 10:56
  SPEAKER_02: You know, she worked at a Troy built manufacturing until I think maybe I was kindergartner or something like that.
• 11:05
  SPEAKER_02: Um, she did daycare for years.
• 11:07
  SPEAKER_02: You know, our house was always running around with kids, and everybody would get in line to have my mom watch the kids and spend time.
• 11:15
  SPEAKER_02: My mom has the patience of a saint.
• 11:18
  SPEAKER_02: I know in her last 10 years, she actually volunteered at the school for the special needs children and stuff like that because she just had the patience, could handle it, and does it.
• 11:26
  SPEAKER_02: She's that type of wonderful person.
• 11:29
  SPEAKER_03: Is and is mom still with us?
• 11:31
  SPEAKER_02: Oh, yeah.
• 11:32
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
• 11:32
  SPEAKER_02: So uh mom is a snowbird now.
• 11:34
  SPEAKER_02: You know, she goes down to South Carolina for about six months uh and comes up here for about six months.
• 11:40
  SPEAKER_02: So all summer long we get to see her, and then uh we get to all travel down to South Carolina in our new beach home.
• 11:45
  SPEAKER_02: Uh, my stepfather's been around since I was probably, I think they got married when I was in fourth grade.
• 11:52
  SPEAKER_02: I've known him since I was in first grade.
• 11:54
  SPEAKER_02: Uh, he's always been the provider.
• 11:56
  SPEAKER_02: And again, another example of work ethic.
• 12:00
  SPEAKER_02: Um, I think I remember around his retirement, him getting some sort of award for like 20 consecutive years without missing a day of work.
• 12:08
  SPEAKER_02: Like he's that type of guy.
• 12:10
  SPEAKER_02: Um, he ended up working in a manufacturing plant that decided, hey, we're in New York, we're gonna close those things.
• 12:16
  SPEAKER_02: He was 54 years old.
• 12:18
  SPEAKER_02: He got an option to go to China for one year or go to Canada for five years to help him out with his retirement.
• 12:24
  SPEAKER_02: He ended up going to China for like eight years.
• 12:26
  SPEAKER_02: So mom went over to China with him.
• 12:28
  SPEAKER_02: He went over there, what a way to live life, see things.
• 12:31
  SPEAKER_02: She taught uh English to some of the orphanages and things like that.
• 12:35
  SPEAKER_02: He did the work, traveled the world, which enabled them to, you know, go by the beach house and have the things that they all deserve.
• 12:41
  SPEAKER_03: Wow.
• 12:42
  SPEAKER_03: What was uh did you ever get to go visit her in China?
• 12:46
  SPEAKER_02: I did not, um, which which is crazy.
• 12:48
  SPEAKER_02: It's one of the bigger regrets.
• 12:50
  SPEAKER_02: Um we were we started the process to adopt uh in China, uh, and going through the legal and all that, and I was gonna use the fact that they were there.
• 13:00
  SPEAKER_02: We had kind of gone through it.
• 13:01
  SPEAKER_02: Um, side note, you know, the good Lord told me I would never have children.
• 13:05
  SPEAKER_02: I had a medical concern that I'd never have children.
• 13:08
  SPEAKER_02: You get to that wonderful New York City, and the doctors are the best in the world.
• 13:12
  SPEAKER_02: I waited seven years in line for a doctor to save up my money to see if he'd uh could fix it.
• 13:18
  SPEAKER_02: And sure enough, right when I called him up, his PA started his own practice, except my insurance.
• 13:24
  SPEAKER_02: I had a little varicacetolectomy, and here's sure we are, you know, 18 months later, started having the babies.
• 13:29
  SPEAKER_02: Wow.
• 13:29
  SPEAKER_02: So yeah, um, no need for adoption.
• 13:33
  SPEAKER_02: Uh yeah.
• 13:34
  SPEAKER_02: And not saying that to be rude, but I mean, we were have we had our two boys, and that was it.
• 13:39
  SPEAKER_02: So it kind of put a egg on it.
• 13:41
  SPEAKER_02: I guess I thought he'd be there forever, right?
• 13:43
  SPEAKER_02: And then all of a sudden he comes home, he retires, and very cool.
• 13:47
  SPEAKER_03: Um, as you think back to to the journey of uh obviously, you know, your your biological dad, not in the picture, and then dad, grandpa, uncle, stepdad, mom, um, still, you know, sound family strong, it sounds like.
• 14:05
  SPEAKER_03: Um, tell me like two or three core values that were most important um that were instilled in you and taught to you through like maybe a story that maybe you've as you as you reflect back.
• 14:15
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah, so my best friend in life, um, who is an incredibly successful uh lawyer, one of the hardest working young men, decided that in high school we would both go work a summer at the mechanical contracting firm.
• 14:29
  SPEAKER_02: Um, and the stories still get told of you know the hard work where you know we had to pave a driveway and 98 degrees, and you know, my grandpa's retired and wouldn't let us get water.
• 14:40
  SPEAKER_02: Um, you know, this was the work ethic.
• 14:42
  SPEAKER_02: It you showed up five minutes late, go home.
• 14:44
  SPEAKER_02: I don't need you, you don't you're not taking me seriously.
• 14:47
  SPEAKER_02: Um, you know, my job was to clean the toilets, mow the lawn, pick up the dirt.
• 14:50
  SPEAKER_02: It didn't matter whatever I was allowed to do if I could make money.
• 14:54
  SPEAKER_02: On weekends, I could do uh fire watch and they double time.
• 14:57
  SPEAKER_02: So I loved it.
• 14:59
  SPEAKER_02: But I remember complaining once in the shop as I was sweeping up, and my grandpa, all 90 pounds soaking wet of them, retired, worked five jobs, you know, crushed it in life.
• 15:11
  SPEAKER_02: You know, what the hell are you complaining about?
• 15:14
  SPEAKER_02: Threw a pipe wrench at me and said, Hard work never killed anybody, shut up.
• 15:18
  SPEAKER_02: And so it's always been, what are you complaining about?
• 15:20
  SPEAKER_02: Hard work never killed anybody.
• 15:22
  SPEAKER_02: And so uh I've always taken that to heart.
• 15:25
  SPEAKER_02: Um, I've always thought that my work ethic is a reflection of my family, my family values, and it's my way to say thank you to the support that I got from my uncle, uh, my grandpa, and giving me those opportunities is it'd be disrespectful to their memories if I didn't work hard.
• 15:42
  SPEAKER_02: Uh so you know, sometimes when I get down in the lurch and everything like that, I have these opportunities because I've worked hard.
• 15:48
  SPEAKER_02: I have these opportunities uh because I had that instilled in me at a young age.
• 15:53
  SPEAKER_02: Uh, and it's been pretty cool.
• 15:55
  SPEAKER_02: Every boss I've ever had has asked me where I got my work ethic.
• 15:58
  SPEAKER_02: Well, you know, they didn't have to push me.
• 16:00
  SPEAKER_02: I had an inner drive.
• 16:01
  SPEAKER_02: So uh it's nice.
• 16:03
  SPEAKER_02: And you know, I try to do that with my boys.
• 16:06
  SPEAKER_02: Uh, it's a different mentality now, it's a different mindset, you know.
• 16:09
  SPEAKER_02: And uh I don't want them working 80 hours in the summer.
• 16:13
  SPEAKER_02: I want them enjoying a little bit of the summer.
• 16:14
  SPEAKER_02: Hey, you're getting your 4.0 at school, you're doing great.
• 16:17
  SPEAKER_02: 20 hours is just fine.
• 16:19
  SPEAKER_02: You know, like, but you're gonna have a job, you're gonna work, you're gonna figure out what you don't want to do.
• 16:24
  SPEAKER_02: Uh, and it absolutely has helped uh both of my kids work.
• 16:29
  SPEAKER_02: Uh, they know that they don't want to work in the food industry because of how hard it is.
• 16:34
  SPEAKER_02: Right.
• 16:35
  SPEAKER_02: You know, and so both of them are pretty motivated to go to college uh and get the opportunities that's out there.
• 16:40
  SPEAKER_02: So I feel like I've checked the box, at least in that aspect of parenting.
• 16:45
  SPEAKER_03: Besides, you know, work ethic, uh, which is obviously a massive one.
• 16:49
  SPEAKER_03: Um, tell me what else comes to mind in terms of things that you learned that you've maybe already shared with your boys that that were part of your journey.
• 16:58
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah, you know, um, I don't want to say that people who know me, like you heard, the living the dream.
• 17:04
  SPEAKER_02: Some people have first impressions, oh, another BS kookie, whatever, they don't believe it.
• 17:10
  SPEAKER_02: Some people will challenge me on it.
• 17:12
  SPEAKER_02: Um, and after you get to know me, you see that it's not a gimmick.
• 17:16
  SPEAKER_02: It's exactly who I am.
• 17:17
  SPEAKER_02: But I don't consider myself an optimist at all.
• 17:19
  SPEAKER_02: Uh, I'm a realist with a good attitude.
• 17:22
  SPEAKER_02: And the difference in the impact that you can have on the people around you is your energy impacts the people around you.
• 17:29
  SPEAKER_02: And the boys are starting to see that now and who they choose to spend their time with is this person adding to my environment or is this person taking away from my environment?
• 17:41
  SPEAKER_02: Some of them are family members, right?
• 17:42
  SPEAKER_02: You know, you can't say you can't choose your family members, but just, you know, understanding your behaviors, your attitude, your communication, and how it impacts not just yourself and but everyone.
• 17:53
  SPEAKER_02: And so I go out of my way to try to be positive, try to be an opt, try to see the you know, uh the forest for the trees every day.
• 18:01
  SPEAKER_02: Um, and I'm seeing it with them, and I'm seeing it when they notice it isn't there.
• 18:07
  SPEAKER_02: And the conversations are real.
• 18:09
  SPEAKER_02: Dad, I just don't want to be happy right now.
• 18:11
  SPEAKER_02: Okay, good.
• 18:12
  SPEAKER_02: Appreciate that, bud.
• 18:13
  SPEAKER_02: At least they can have that conversation and have that realization that you know this is the way they feel, and they're communicating it to me because yeah, I absolutely have that too.
• 18:21
  SPEAKER_02: You know, that's where I'll go for my bike ride, I'll go golf, I'll go work out, I'll go do, go do something.
• 18:26
  SPEAKER_02: Um, and try not to take it out on the people around me.
• 18:29
  SPEAKER_02: And I absolutely can see that.
• 18:31
  SPEAKER_02: My mom has the best attitude.
• 18:34
  SPEAKER_02: You know, there could be cancer in the family, there's uh an issue here, and she can always see the light, she can always see the positive uh and always root for it.
• 18:45
  SPEAKER_02: And it's just it's so much easier to be around and be around, surround yourself with people like that.
• 18:52
  SPEAKER_02: Um, versus you know, that other one who wants to come in and complain and show you negatives on everything.
• 18:58
  SPEAKER_02: It's not to say that I don't want to be around those people, but I want to do what I've done in the last 10 years is try to wow, that must be hard for you.
• 19:05
  SPEAKER_02: Explain to me why.
• 19:06
  SPEAKER_02: Like, how can you see that that way?
• 19:08
  SPEAKER_02: And some people I can't get through, but others, it's been you know, the best relationships I have in my life is because they turn to me now, you know, and there's our older family members or cousins or uh you know, in-laws that look to me, hey, I want to have a chat with Adam because it always makes me feel better.
• 19:25
  SPEAKER_03: Where do you think your mom's positive positivity comes from?
• 19:29
  SPEAKER_02: I think honestly, leading for me.
• 19:31
  SPEAKER_02: I you know, I was a shy kid.
• 19:33
  SPEAKER_02: I didn't have the easiest upbringing, I guess.
• 19:36
  SPEAKER_02: Um, I think I hid behind her until I was fourth grade, apparently.
• 19:40
  SPEAKER_02: I wouldn't speak to anybody.
• 19:41
  SPEAKER_02: Uh, when I went to first grade, apparently they had to pull me from the public school because I wouldn't speak and I'd sit in the corner.
• 19:48
  SPEAKER_02: I lost 10 pounds, and so they put me in the little tiny school.
• 19:51
  SPEAKER_02: We didn't have any money.
• 19:52
  SPEAKER_02: How'd we do that?
• 19:53
  SPEAKER_02: I found out my grandpa paid for that and all this.
• 19:56
  SPEAKER_02: I started figuring out these things many years later.
• 19:58
  SPEAKER_02: Like, how did Adam go to this nice school?
• 20:00
  SPEAKER_02: You know, at least until third grade.
• 20:02
  SPEAKER_02: Um, I went to a military institute for my freshman year because my father thought it, you know, I was a very smart young man and it would help me.
• 20:09
  SPEAKER_02: Two months in, I started getting the phone calls.
• 20:11
  SPEAKER_02: Can you come down to the principal's office?
• 20:14
  SPEAKER_02: Sure, you haven't paid your tuition.
• 20:16
  SPEAKER_02: Talk to my dad.
• 20:17
  SPEAKER_02: Uh well, we haven't.
• 20:18
  SPEAKER_02: Well, me neither.
• 20:19
  SPEAKER_02: I haven't talked to him.
• 20:19
  SPEAKER_02: So by about the third month, I was 15 years old.
• 20:23
  SPEAKER_02: I walked down the emergency at the principal's office and said, Oh, yeah, yeah, I was supposed to tell you guys, um, my dad's not gonna be able to pay tuition, so I got to sign myself out of here.
• 20:30
  SPEAKER_02: I literally signed a bunch of paperwork on a Friday afternoon as a 15-year-old freshman and came home on the CDTA Troy City bus, walked up, you know, the mile and a half of my two backpacks to the house and said, Mom, I did it.
• 20:43
  SPEAKER_02: I'm finally out of that school.
• 20:44
  SPEAKER_02: And she looked at the paperwork, started screaming at me.
• 20:47
  SPEAKER_02: And uh on Monday, I showed up at the public school, waited outside on the bench until the guidance counselor had time to see me.
• 20:55
  SPEAKER_02: By 11 o'clock, I was walking into new classes, just signed up, and luckily I was smart enough to figure it out and keep the grades good.
• 21:02
  SPEAKER_02: But I just looking back on things like that, oh my God, like you know, I should have been such a stronger young man at that time, but it was always my mom was the rock, you know.
• 21:11
  SPEAKER_02: And wow, she was always there.
• 21:14
  SPEAKER_02: Fifteen.
• 21:15
  SPEAKER_03: I was a freshman, yeah, uh at LaSalle Military Institute.
• 21:19
  SPEAKER_03: What how come you went to military school?
• 21:21
  SPEAKER_02: My dad had gone briefly.
• 21:23
  SPEAKER_02: Um, I had scored very high on state testing.
• 21:28
  SPEAKER_02: I missed a scholarship to Johns Hopkins on my SAT in seventh grade by 30 points.
• 21:33
  SPEAKER_02: Um so I could score.
• 21:35
  SPEAKER_02: I knew math.
• 21:36
  SPEAKER_02: I could, you know, I liked math.
• 21:38
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah, I when I played the computer games, yeah, I'd play some games, but I'd play math games.
• 21:42
  SPEAKER_02: I enjoyed it.
• 21:43
  SPEAKER_02: You know, I went to math league because it was fun.
• 21:45
  SPEAKER_02: I'd take my soccer cleats off and run off to the gym to go math league and compete with other people.
• 21:50
  SPEAKER_02: I enjoyed it.
• 21:52
  SPEAKER_02: Um, I didn't have a hard pri hard time learning if given the opportunity.
• 21:57
  SPEAKER_02: So my dad thought it would be best.
• 21:59
  SPEAKER_02: And I didn't disagree.
• 22:00
  SPEAKER_02: I liked the school, but I was not happy with getting called down to the principal's office twice a week for the last like six weeks, asking for money that I didn't have, my mom didn't have.
• 22:10
  SPEAKER_02: Um, and taking public buses home, trying to find a public bus, get it home, and then walk a mile and a half up a hill.
• 22:18
  SPEAKER_02: Like, come on, as a 15-year-old, as little much.
• 22:20
  SPEAKER_02: My mom had just had my sister, you know, so I had a brand new baby sister who, you know, she couldn't pick me up, she couldn't drive, so I had to try to find it and figure it out.
• 22:30
  SPEAKER_03: Wow.
• 22:32
  SPEAKER_03: You ever sit back and reflect like what those experiences, how they've impacted you and helped you incorporate?
• 22:38
  SPEAKER_02: Probably not as much as I just did telling you.
• 22:42
  SPEAKER_02: You know, yes, there's been a time or two where it's come up.
• 22:46
  SPEAKER_02: Um not in a while, to be honest with you.
• 22:50
  SPEAKER_03: How many people listening to this that you work with have no idea about that story?
• 22:55
  SPEAKER_02: So my my friends growing up will know, which is I am incredibly lucky.
• 23:00
  SPEAKER_02: I still hang out with you know a core of probably seven people that I've known since I was 10 years old.
• 23:09
  SPEAKER_02: Love it.
• 23:10
  SPEAKER_02: And still see them.
• 23:11
  SPEAKER_02: My best friend and I rode our bikes together at 14 years old, um, went our separate ways when I went to New York City, but always you know kept in touch.
• 23:20
  SPEAKER_02: Didn't matter if it was a day or a year.
• 23:22
  SPEAKER_02: Um, and still, you know, every Friday or Saturday there's at least one golf outing we do together, the families do together, his kids call me Uncle Adam.
• 23:31
  SPEAKER_02: Um, so I think those group of people would know.
• 23:34
  SPEAKER_02: I don't think a lot of the work relationships would know.
• 23:38
  SPEAKER_02: You know, I definitely learned after my first year of working that maybe I need to keep some things, you know, to myself.
• 23:44
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah.
• 23:46
  SPEAKER_03: I think though that uh I'm excited for people that you work with to listen to this.
• 23:50
  SPEAKER_03: And I appreciate you coming on because I think these stories uh connect people.
• 23:55
  SPEAKER_03: And you know, that one of the goals when I started this podcast um shoot six years ago was whether you're an executive at a staffing company, uh barista, a bus driver, a software executive, our kids could give two shits.
• 24:09
  SPEAKER_03: They're really good.
• 24:10
  SPEAKER_03: And but our male ego says, yeah, but I'm this and I've been here 27 years.
• 24:14
  SPEAKER_03: Who cares?
• 24:15
  SPEAKER_03: What our kids care about is hey, can we play catch?
• 24:17
  SPEAKER_03: Hey, where are we going on vacation?
• 24:18
  SPEAKER_03: Hey, can we go, can we go to Mexican the night?
• 24:20
  SPEAKER_03: Hey, hey, can we go can we go to the Rams game?
• 24:23
  SPEAKER_03: And you know, I think it's our job as dads to like put that ego aside and just realize, hey, we're well, we we got the same job, same job title.
• 24:32
  SPEAKER_03: Let's keep them out of jail, let's instill values, let's teach them how to like all the things you talked about, like bringing energy, bring in, being positive, um, surround yourself with good people.
• 24:42
  SPEAKER_03: And it's interesting, I interviewed a guy recently, and he's he had a really good point.
• 24:46
  SPEAKER_03: He said, you know, like to get to drive a boat, you gotta get a boater's license.
• 24:51
  SPEAKER_03: To get a car, you gotta get a driver's license.
• 24:54
  SPEAKER_03: To you know, to be a pilot, you gotta get a pilot's license.
• 24:56
  SPEAKER_03: But to be a dad, you just gotta get someone pregnant, and you then you're qualified.
• 25:00
  SPEAKER_03: It's like that's kind of ass backwards if you think about it.
• 25:05
  SPEAKER_03: 100%.
• 25:06
  SPEAKER_03: But imagine if you had to get qualified before you can have a dad to be a dad.
• 25:09
  SPEAKER_03: Like, what would I was like, that's a really interesting thing.
• 25:11
  SPEAKER_03: I've never thought about like that.
• 25:13
  SPEAKER_02: But I grew up telling every significant relationship by the third month of being together that I would never be able to have children.
• 25:21
  SPEAKER_02: I had a freak accident October 11, 1986, that we'll go into another podcast that'll make people cry.
• 25:28
  SPEAKER_02: Um, and I was told, you're probably not gonna have kids at 15, like, hey, you know, you're not gonna be able to have kids.
• 25:34
  SPEAKER_02: Um it was wasn't that hard.
• 25:36
  SPEAKER_02: I had a varica seal and they fixed it and they fixed it, but apparently they shouldn't have touched it twice.
• 25:40
  SPEAKER_02: The New York City doctor fixed it, but everybody I ever met from ninth grade on, I can't have kids, I can't have kids.
• 25:48
  SPEAKER_02: My wife Selena was born to be a mother.
• 25:50
  SPEAKER_02: Like, this is all she put on this earth.
• 25:53
  SPEAKER_02: The fact that she doesn't have a baby girl is still upsetting to her.
• 25:56
  SPEAKER_02: And yet she was the only one who said, Don't worry, we'll work on it, we'll figure it out, we'll figure it out.
• 26:00
  SPEAKER_02: She never had a doubt, which made it very difficult when you're struggling for those first few years trying to have kids.
• 26:07
  SPEAKER_02: So I think a lot of my parenting was because A, I didn't have the best relationship with my father, didn't really know.
• 26:16
  SPEAKER_02: B, I was told I was never to have kids.
• 26:19
  SPEAKER_02: So I had that mentality.
• 26:20
  SPEAKER_02: I don't want kids.
• 26:20
  SPEAKER_02: I don't want kids.
• 26:21
  SPEAKER_02: I'm gonna do this all myself.
• 26:22
  SPEAKER_02: Deep down, I absolutely wanted kids.
• 26:25
  SPEAKER_02: I was born to be a father.
• 26:26
  SPEAKER_02: This is my proudest moment is to be a father.
• 26:28
  SPEAKER_02: I wake up and breathe the air so I can be a father.
• 26:31
  SPEAKER_02: Uh, but it was interesting.
• 26:32
  SPEAKER_02: But my dynamics and everybody who knew me only knew me as a kid who never wanted kids.
• 26:37
  SPEAKER_02: But that was only because of the medical issue.
• 26:40
  SPEAKER_02: And once that changed, my whole world changed.
• 26:42
  SPEAKER_03: Wow.
• 26:43
  SPEAKER_03: Well, if if you don't mind, I'm I'm intrigued.
• 26:45
  SPEAKER_03: My curiosity, I gotta hear about what happened by this accident.
• 26:49
  SPEAKER_03: I feel like Sharon.
• 26:50
  SPEAKER_01: Is this a PG podcast?
• 26:52
  SPEAKER_02: Oh, yeah.
• 26:52
  SPEAKER_03: Oh my god.
• 26:53
  SPEAKER_03: We can do our we can I can make a little bit.
• 26:56
  SPEAKER_02: We're 11 years old, we're picking teams for football.
• 26:58
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
• 26:59
  SPEAKER_02: Okay, we're at a cemetery in a big open grassy area next to all the things.
• 27:03
  SPEAKER_02: There is a flagpole, and you know what they tie the flagpole ropes on.
• 27:08
  SPEAKER_04: Yeah.
• 27:09
  SPEAKER_02: Okay.
• 27:09
  SPEAKER_02: Adam's hanging out 12 inches off the ground, standing on the edge of one of the flagpole things, and I get picked, it's raining out a little bit, and my foot slips.
• 27:19
  SPEAKER_02: And I just slide down and hit the ground, and that thing that you tie the ropes on caught my scrotum, I guess it's called, and ripped a hole right from the bottom to the top.
• 27:33
  SPEAKER_02: I am the luckiest guy in the world because it didn't touch the member, but it ripped a hole, you know, the size of a golf ball right up my screw.
• 27:43
  SPEAKER_02: You could see the other things.
• 27:45
  SPEAKER_02: I fell to my knees.
• 27:46
  SPEAKER_02: I uh reached down into my pants and ow, you know, ow, and my hands were all blood.
• 27:51
  SPEAKER_02: I was like, uh oh.
• 27:52
  SPEAKER_02: I was like, oh, what's going on here?
• 27:54
  SPEAKER_02: I dropped my pants and realized what had happened and just started screaming.
• 27:58
  SPEAKER_02: And you can imagine 25, you know, 11 to 14-year-old boys all started screaming, and everybody ran, except for one kid, the 14-year-old, who was my neighbor, said we can't leave him, ran back, picked me up, carried me, you know, essentially less than a block to his house, my my neighbor's house.
• 28:16
  SPEAKER_02: My mom happened to be grocery shopping, so the ambulance came to his house.
• 28:20
  SPEAKER_02: I kept it all together, you know, held it all together.
• 28:23
  SPEAKER_02: And it was the most painful, incredible experience ever, getting needles in that area, sewing it back up.
• 28:30
  SPEAKER_02: Um, but at that point they said, Oh, you have some damage to one of these things, and you have a varicoseil in the other.
• 28:36
  SPEAKER_02: I don't think you're gonna be, and so they thought they fixed it at a 12-year-old.
• 28:40
  SPEAKER_02: But what I found out when I got much older is they should have never touched me until I was ready to have kids because they could have fixed it quickly with a varicoseil.
• 28:48
  SPEAKER_02: When you fix it, it generally wants to come back.
• 28:50
  SPEAKER_02: And so essentially I just had a I had a varicoseil.
• 28:53
  SPEAKER_02: And I had the surgery twice before I got in line with that New York City doctor that fixed it right away.
• 28:58
  SPEAKER_02: Wow.
• 28:59
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah, crazy.
• 29:00
  SPEAKER_02: And that's where I was destined to go to New York.
• 29:03
  SPEAKER_02: I got a good story there.
• 29:05
  SPEAKER_02: Why I'm in New York, why I'm in sales in New York.
• 29:08
  SPEAKER_02: I'm a guy who couldn't speak to people in fourth grade.
• 29:11
  SPEAKER_02: I hid behind my mom.
• 29:12
  SPEAKER_02: I wouldn't, you couldn't get me to speak out loud in front of anyone.
• 29:15
  SPEAKER_02: I don't think I really came out of my shell until like ninth or tenth grade a little bit.
• 29:19
  SPEAKER_02: But even then, the teachers that knew me back then are like, you do what, Adam?
• 29:23
  SPEAKER_02: You give presentations for a living, you travel the country, travel the world now, and speak.
• 29:27
  SPEAKER_02: And they're they've seen some things on LinkedIn.
• 29:29
  SPEAKER_02: They're like, Who are you?
• 29:30
  SPEAKER_02: I don't even remember this young man.
• 29:32
  SPEAKER_02: So interesting, you know, that I became that guy.
• 29:36
  SPEAKER_03: Um, how did you what what made you want to get into sales?
• 29:41
  SPEAKER_02: So, picture upstate New York, you get on the school bus and you go on a class trip to New York City.
• 29:46
  SPEAKER_02: Okay.
• 29:47
  SPEAKER_04: Yeah.
• 29:48
  SPEAKER_02: You go to New York City, everybody gets off the bus at the Statue of Liberty Dead Battery Park.
• 29:53
  SPEAKER_02: And, you know, me and my friends were into we're gonna get a watch, we're gonna get a nice Rolex, we're gonna have fun with all this stuff, good glasses.
• 30:00
  SPEAKER_02: So, I mean, two or three other guys got a plan.
• 30:03
  SPEAKER_02: But then I turn around and I see, you know, 10 different vendors hawking five different groups of people and everybody get different prices.
• 30:10
  SPEAKER_02: And I said, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa.
• 30:12
  SPEAKER_02: I said, everybody who wants a watch, get behind me.
• 30:14
  SPEAKER_02: And I said, all the vendors, one guy's going to get all this business.
• 30:18
  SPEAKER_02: You're not getting it all.
• 30:19
  SPEAKER_02: I'm negotiating for everybody.
• 30:21
  SPEAKER_02: Nobody buy anything until I tell you the price.
• 30:23
  SPEAKER_02: And I stood there while the teachers watched me and negotiated for 25 people to get them the better deal.
• 30:29
  SPEAKER_02: It wasn't that I wanted to negotiate.
• 30:30
  SPEAKER_02: I just wanted to make sure my friends weren't getting taken advantage of.
• 30:34
  SPEAKER_02: But I saw the way New York, the energy, the way you could communicate, ask for anything.
• 30:39
  SPEAKER_02: And my teacher got back on the bus, says, You belong down here.
• 30:43
  SPEAKER_02: Of course, I get out of college.
• 30:45
  SPEAKER_02: I'm doing a little bit of pharmaceutical sales.
• 30:47
  SPEAKER_02: It's not the most motivating.
• 30:49
  SPEAKER_02: I got a capped income.
• 30:51
  SPEAKER_02: I'm waiting for Selena to graduate so we can move to New York City.
• 30:55
  SPEAKER_02: And on a whim, I took this interview with the IT staffing firm, right?
• 31:00
  SPEAKER_02: But the unlimited commission got me.
• 31:03
  SPEAKER_02: I was like, wait a second.
• 31:05
  SPEAKER_02: I can make how much?
• 31:07
  SPEAKER_02: And I asked a few people in the office.
• 31:08
  SPEAKER_02: Not everybody was making it, but a couple people were doing well.
• 31:11
  SPEAKER_02: I said, all right.
• 31:12
  SPEAKER_02: And I talked to my girlfriend at the time.
• 31:15
  SPEAKER_02: I talked to my mom at the time.
• 31:16
  SPEAKER_02: I said, this is what I'm going to try.
• 31:17
  SPEAKER_02: My mom was not happy about it because I got a nice pharmaceutical sales gig.
• 31:20
  SPEAKER_02: At least the bills are going to get paid.
• 31:21
  SPEAKER_02: I will tell you, my second month, I borrowed$1,300 from my now wife to help pay rent because the commissions don't kick in right away.
• 31:30
  SPEAKER_02: But I was the first one in.
• 31:32
  SPEAKER_02: I was the last one to leave.
• 31:34
  SPEAKER_02: Being poor is a huge motivational factor when you can't pay rent your third month unless you start getting some deals.
• 31:40
  SPEAKER_02: And so it just spurred me to get a little bit more success, a little faster.
• 31:46
  SPEAKER_02: Uh, then you start learning the tricks of the trade, right?
• 31:48
  SPEAKER_02: You learn, oh, I can make this process better.
• 31:50
  SPEAKER_02: Oh, I can help this.
• 31:51
  SPEAKER_02: You know, I chased down a whale.
• 31:54
  SPEAKER_02: We all know the whales.
• 31:55
  SPEAKER_02: Bank of America was creating an investment bank in New York.
• 32:00
  SPEAKER_02: Started seeing a bunch of consultants go off the market to equities and fixed income.
• 32:04
  SPEAKER_02: So started chasing those guys down.
• 32:06
  SPEAKER_02: And I remember I got the global head of equities on the phone.
• 32:09
  SPEAKER_02: He said, Why the hell do you keep calling me?
• 32:12
  SPEAKER_02: I said, Because you buy a lot of what I sell and you could change my life.
• 32:16
  SPEAKER_02: Great, you're like everyone else.
• 32:17
  SPEAKER_02: Please don't call anymore.
• 32:18
  SPEAKER_02: Just give me a chance.
• 32:19
  SPEAKER_02: You know, let me come meet you.
• 32:21
  SPEAKER_02: Maybe I can impress upon you enough.
• 32:22
  SPEAKER_02: Fine, fine, fine.
• 32:23
  SPEAKER_02: 415 after trading.
• 32:25
  SPEAKER_02: We went up and he goes, I really appreciate your tenacity, young man, but you're not going to be able to help me.
• 32:31
  SPEAKER_02: There's nothing you can do for me.
• 32:32
  SPEAKER_02: You're like everyone else.
• 32:33
  SPEAKER_02: I said, Well, try me.
• 32:34
  SPEAKER_02: He goes, Fine, I think this is great.
• 32:36
  SPEAKER_02: How many people are supporting Morgan Stanley equity derivatives and what technology they're using?
• 32:40
  SPEAKER_02: And I wrote it down.
• 32:41
  SPEAKER_02: He goes, You don't have the answer.
• 32:42
  SPEAKER_02: I go, Well, what else?
• 32:43
  SPEAKER_02: Goldman Sachs.
• 32:44
  SPEAKER_02: He started asking me questions about financial services in New York City.
• 32:48
  SPEAKER_02: I looked at him, I say, okay, I'll get you these things quick.
• 32:51
  SPEAKER_02: He goes, See, you don't have the answers.
• 32:52
  SPEAKER_02: You're useless to me.
• 32:54
  SPEAKER_02: I said, wait, I don't, but I have access to these and I will get these for you.
• 32:58
  SPEAKER_02: So I went back, quickly got back to the office.
• 33:01
  SPEAKER_02: I got some senior level recruiters.
• 33:03
  SPEAKER_02: I know that they got consultants at all these places.
• 33:06
  SPEAKER_02: I say, I will buy pizzas in a 12-pack if you just spend and get me these three answers.
• 33:11
  SPEAKER_02: We must have had the answers in 35 minutes.
• 33:14
  SPEAKER_02: So call up first thing in the morning.
• 33:16
  SPEAKER_02: I'm gonna walk to the subway again because that's how I got them yesterday.
• 33:20
  SPEAKER_02: Called up, he picked up, said, I got your answers.
• 33:22
  SPEAKER_02: He goes, Okay, good.
• 33:23
  SPEAKER_02: What are they?
• 33:24
  SPEAKER_02: I said, Come on, even I'm not that dumb.
• 33:26
  SPEAKER_02: I was like, when do you have time for me?
• 33:28
  SPEAKER_02: 4 15 again.
• 33:29
  SPEAKER_02: We walk up at 4 15.
• 33:31
  SPEAKER_02: I get in front of him.
• 33:33
  SPEAKER_02: I'm a young kid with an oversized suit, you know, but I'm willing to work.
• 33:37
  SPEAKER_02: And I sit down, he goes, Okay, go.
• 33:39
  SPEAKER_02: And I start giving him the answers.
• 33:42
  SPEAKER_02: And there's all of a sudden silence, and I'm like, oh shit.
• 33:44
  SPEAKER_02: And he looks at me, he goes, All right, follow me.
• 33:47
  SPEAKER_02: Gets up, walks into this huge board one on 57th Street overlooking Central Park and goes, guys, this is Adam.
• 33:54
  SPEAKER_02: Where are you from?
• 33:55
  SPEAKER_02: I was like, Sapphire Technologies at the time.
• 33:58
  SPEAKER_02: Adam from Sapphire, start doing your hiring from him.
• 34:01
  SPEAKER_02: And that was it.
• 34:02
  SPEAKER_02: Within a few months, I started recognizing that you know they were hiring one out of 18.
• 34:07
  SPEAKER_02: It was this written test.
• 34:09
  SPEAKER_02: I said, How about I take the written test?
• 34:11
  SPEAKER_02: I administer the test in my office.
• 34:13
  SPEAKER_02: I take the hard copies and bring them to you because people would cheat if you did it online and things like that.
• 34:18
  SPEAKER_02: So literally, we had 30, 40 people coming in per week taking the tests.
• 34:23
  SPEAKER_02: I'd bring them up to the managers, drop them off.
• 34:26
  SPEAKER_02: You know, we were doing our glider hacker rank before it even existed.
• 34:30
  SPEAKER_02: And we quickly went from one out of 18 to 11 of the next 18 interviews were hires in the group over the course of a couple weeks.
• 34:39
  SPEAKER_02: Um, he loved what I was doing.
• 34:40
  SPEAKER_02: He wanted me to teach the other vendors how to do it.
• 34:43
  SPEAKER_02: Okay.
• 34:44
  SPEAKER_02: I then they weren't doing it as well.
• 34:46
  SPEAKER_02: I also did my talent management.
• 34:47
  SPEAKER_02: Every month I take the consultants out, collect all the data, then report back to him.
• 34:51
  SPEAKER_02: Hey, they're struggling with this.
• 34:53
  SPEAKER_02: It's not, you know, the connectivity for fix is wrong over here.
• 34:56
  SPEAKER_02: That's why they're struggling.
• 34:57
  SPEAKER_02: Oh, I didn't know that.
• 34:58
  SPEAKER_02: I started providing him valuable information that would make it better.
• 35:02
  SPEAKER_02: Um, this guy, you know, doesn't feel like he's appreciated because they're not using your C.
• 35:07
  SPEAKER_02: Oh, let's move them over here.
• 35:09
  SPEAKER_02: This guy couldn't stand being next to somebody.
• 35:11
  SPEAKER_02: I found a closet that was empty.
• 35:14
  SPEAKER_02: I got a desk and a thing set up, and I set them up in there, and he was happy.
• 35:17
  SPEAKER_02: So little things where I started making it better, doing things like that.
• 35:21
  SPEAKER_02: After the first year, he said, everybody, no matter what, goes through Adam.
• 35:25
  SPEAKER_02: So all the other vendors even had to go through me, even though we had a field glass VMS and all the others.
• 35:30
  SPEAKER_02: So I earned it.
• 35:32
  SPEAKER_02: I worked my butt off for that guy for a number of years.
• 35:34
  SPEAKER_02: I got to be the number one sales rep in the country.
• 35:36
  SPEAKER_02: It changed my life, it helped me pay off all those bills and get ahead in life.
• 35:40
  SPEAKER_02: But it's uh, you know, it wasn't anything more than hard work initially.
• 35:44
  SPEAKER_02: And it was how can I improve this process?
• 35:46
  SPEAKER_02: How can I show them value?
• 35:47
  SPEAKER_02: And every time I, before I went to a meeting, what is going to be valuable to them?
• 35:51
  SPEAKER_02: What is going to be valuable to them?
• 35:52
  SPEAKER_02: And I still think I take that today as you know, that second meeting.
• 35:56
  SPEAKER_02: How am I providing value?
• 35:58
  SPEAKER_02: You know, if it isn't people, if it isn't process, if it isn't technology, if it isn't the projects, information.
• 36:05
  SPEAKER_02: Like you said, Casey, I've been doing it 26 years.
• 36:07
  SPEAKER_02: I've seen a lot of wrongs, I've seen some rights, and I think I can go into most environments and at least have a positive impact in a short period of time.
• 36:17
  SPEAKER_00: Hello, everybody.
• 36:18
  SPEAKER_00: My name's Craig Coe, and I'm the senior vice president of relationship management for Beeline.
• 36:24
  SPEAKER_00: For more than 20 years, we've been helping Fortune 1000 companies drive a competitive advantage with their external workforce.
• 36:30
  SPEAKER_00: In fact, Beeline's history of first-to-market innovations has become today's industry standards.
• 36:36
  SPEAKER_00: I get asked all the time, what did Casey do for your organization?
• 36:40
  SPEAKER_00: And I say this, it's simple.
• 36:42
  SPEAKER_00: The guy Flat Out gets it, relationships matter.
• 36:45
  SPEAKER_00: His down-to-earth presentation, his real-world experience apply to every area of our business.
• 36:51
  SPEAKER_00: In fact, his book, Win the Relationship and Not the Deal, has become required reading for all new members of the Global Relationship Management Team.
• 37:01
  SPEAKER_00: If you'd like to know more about me or about Beeline, please reach out to me on LinkedIn.
• 37:06
  SPEAKER_00: And if you don't know Casey Jacks, go to caseyjaycox.com and learn more about how he can help your organization.
• 37:13
  SPEAKER_00: Now, let's get back to today's episode.
• 37:17
  SPEAKER_03: Well, I know you and I joked about recently that this the staffing or consulting industry is a is not an old man's game, but you're you're the OG and uh still making it making an impact.
• 37:29
  SPEAKER_03: So like if there's if there's customers out there and you're you're tired of working with that 23-year-old person that doesn't know what he or she's doing, we'll make sure Adam's information is linked in the show notes so you can reach out to him and his team and they can take care of you like you deserve to be taken care of.
• 37:44
  SPEAKER_03: Um I want to go back to the the journey.
• 37:48
  SPEAKER_03: So you you you learn hard work, you you learn you know a lot of the other emotional intelligence, you learn the art of um negotiation early.
• 37:57
  SPEAKER_03: Uh you're you're shown leadership at 15 before you probably even knew it, or 14, wherever that field trip, how over was that field trip.
• 38:06
  SPEAKER_03: Um relating it back to now your your boys, um, and all the values you've learned through your grandpa, your uncle, your your pops, mom, and even what you've seen in corporate, to talk about what are like the two or three uh most important values that you and your wife have taught your boys that like you're super proud of.
• 38:24
  SPEAKER_02: There's a lot of them.
• 38:25
  SPEAKER_02: I'm sure I'm gonna miss some.
• 38:27
  SPEAKER_02: I think the mutual respect is the first one where you show the same level of respect for everyone.
• 38:35
  SPEAKER_02: Just because I I don't care their job title, I don't care their socioeconomic status, their skin color, and you treat everybody with respect, and it what goes around comes around.
• 38:44
  SPEAKER_02: And I get so many compliments for how kind my kids are.
• 38:49
  SPEAKER_02: Um, and look at it in high school, it's a lot easier to go with that group that is the mean or follow it.
• 38:55
  SPEAKER_02: And I've got plenty of examples of my younger son standing up for you know, someone who he didn't feel it was right.
• 39:03
  SPEAKER_02: And there's a reason he left that high school.
• 39:05
  SPEAKER_02: Um, you know, there was just so much that he really didn't like.
• 39:10
  SPEAKER_02: And he's a big, strong kid, and of course, you know, they would love to pick on him.
• 39:14
  SPEAKER_02: Um and he just he you know, after a while said, I'm sick and tired of seeing these people get treated like this, it's unacceptable.
• 39:21
  SPEAKER_02: And uh he finally just went to this other school.
• 39:23
  SPEAKER_02: And the feedback for the first six weeks has been this is what people should treat people like.
• 39:28
  SPEAKER_02: You know, this is where I expect to be in life, is that you have common respect for each other.
• 39:33
  SPEAKER_02: Um, so uh the mutual respect is a big thing.
• 39:37
  SPEAKER_02: Um, my son is making his college choices and came back and said, no disrespect to Notre Dame.
• 39:45
  SPEAKER_02: It was the most incredible experience.
• 39:47
  SPEAKER_02: He got to go to the summer scholar programs, take classes this summer.
• 39:50
  SPEAKER_02: We thought this is a shoe-in.
• 39:52
  SPEAKER_02: You know, who's gonna turn down Notre Dame?
• 39:54
  SPEAKER_02: Uh, and he came home and he said, it was incredible, but I would prefer a more diverse student body.
• 40:02
  SPEAKER_02: I prefer prefer, you know, a little bit of real life.
• 40:06
  SPEAKER_02: You know, this seemed like it was almost, you know, magical dad.
• 40:09
  SPEAKER_02: Everybody looked the same, had the same passion for the school.
• 40:12
  SPEAKER_02: That's not real life out there.
• 40:13
  SPEAKER_02: And I was like, wow, what a mature thought.
• 40:16
  SPEAKER_02: Amazing, you know, that this young man could come up with that.
• 40:20
  SPEAKER_02: Of course, mom and dad now want to figure out could they take 50-year-olds at Notre Dame?
• 40:25
  SPEAKER_02: Because I'm gonna go back to that school.
• 40:27
  SPEAKER_02: Um, it was incredible, but I was so proud of that.
• 40:30
  SPEAKER_02: So the mutual respect is absolutely one of them.
• 40:33
  SPEAKER_02: Um, the the work ethic, look at both of them at you know, 14 years old went to their guidance counselor and got their working papers.
• 40:41
  SPEAKER_02: At 15 years old, both of them were working.
• 40:43
  SPEAKER_02: Um, I do think that it, you know, I could pay their bills, I could do their things, but it's important for them to understand, you know, the value of a dollar.
• 40:51
  SPEAKER_02: Um, both of my kids invest in e-trade and uh, you know, savings.
• 40:56
  SPEAKER_02: And you know, when they get a paycheck, half goes to savings.
• 40:59
  SPEAKER_02: I helped them with that initially.
• 41:01
  SPEAKER_02: I don't even have to help them now.
• 41:02
  SPEAKER_02: They do it on their own.
• 41:03
  SPEAKER_02: Um, so I think some of those financial educations that I didn't get, you know, I had to be a sales rep because I needed someone to pay my bar bill all the time when I took everybody out.
• 41:14
  SPEAKER_02: Right.
• 41:15
  SPEAKER_02: They don't have that issue.
• 41:16
  SPEAKER_02: So um I'm proud of that maturity that they have with work ethic, mutual respect.
• 41:21
  SPEAKER_02: We'll say those two to start.
• 41:23
  SPEAKER_03: Wow.
• 41:23
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah, that's not normal, my man.
• 41:25
  SPEAKER_03: So kudos to you and your wife for for doing that.
• 41:28
  SPEAKER_03: Um I I told this story before.
• 41:30
  SPEAKER_03: So, like in 2020, I was that dad that was doing way too much for my kids but didn't realize it.
• 41:36
  SPEAKER_03: And then I read a I had a guest on the show named Swen Nader.
• 41:39
  SPEAKER_03: He wrote a book called You Have Not Taught Until They Have Learned.
• 41:42
  SPEAKER_03: And when I read that, I was like, whoa, I don't want to be this dude.
• 41:46
  SPEAKER_03: And so like then we were literally went like cold turkey, and and the excuse we were telling ourselves is like, oh, we're busy, we got you know, crazy job and getting kids to sports, and we'll just do this, and all that, but like we're hurting them, you know, and you know, and I if you Googled worst handyman in US history and then click images, probably my face will show up.
• 42:06
  SPEAKER_03: Like, I'm not Oh, I don't know.
• 42:07
  SPEAKER_02: I think I'm right there, but you I shake hands for a living, pal.
• 42:10
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah, I type and I talk for a living, but I I'm a I'm a I like I work my ass off too and I work hard and I just don't have the the engineering mind to see it.
• 42:20
  SPEAKER_03: But I always say I'm a great secondhand, but like you know, my kids, they don't they don't have that skill, but like they make their own meals now, they're doing their own laundry.
• 42:28
  SPEAKER_03: It's like, and you know, as as when you your kids are obviously going to be set up to be successful in college, like that's you know, my son's in the second year, and just seeing that he's surviving and thriving and going through ups and downs and still staying level-headed, like those are the things that I'm most proud of.
• 42:49
  SPEAKER_03: Um, and you I I share the story because you maybe think of it, but um was this was this the thought?
• 42:54
  SPEAKER_03: Because I'd love to make sure I love if there's a younger dad listening that, like, well, how do I do that?
• 42:58
  SPEAKER_03: Like, what advice would you give a younger dad on how to like embrace that mindset you and your wife had?
• 43:04
  SPEAKER_03: And and what would be some actionable things that he or she could do to set them up for success, like you've done with your kids?
• 43:10
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah, I mean, the easiest, most popular decision might not be the best one.
• 43:15
  SPEAKER_02: And so some of these decisions were painful.
• 43:17
  SPEAKER_02: You know, you want to be your son's best friend, you want him to confide in you, but you're gonna have to teach him certain things where, you know, for 24, 36, or even longer, he might not want to talk to you.
• 43:27
  SPEAKER_02: He might not want to give you the time of day.
• 43:29
  SPEAKER_02: You might not get invited, you know, to go shoot hoops with his friends now, you know, you might not get invited for that fourth person in golf because uh he's mad at you for that day.
• 43:38
  SPEAKER_02: Uh, but long term, you got to look at it and say, what's best for him growing up to be, you know, a happy, healthy man, to treat the the woman or man of his life with respect uh and to provide for his family.
• 43:51
  SPEAKER_02: You know, and so my legacy uh is, you know, this was something we learned at work, is you know, when you were number one, did you think your legacy was going to be uh Casey Jackson that they're all gonna remember number one sales rep.
• 44:06
  SPEAKER_02: Nope.
• 44:08
  SPEAKER_02: Nobody gives a damn what I sold in 2008.
• 44:11
  SPEAKER_02: Nobody remembers my legacy, is the impact I have on people, the career is what they've learned.
• 44:17
  SPEAKER_02: And so that's where it's starting to be really exciting to see my boys become men and do certain things that I'm just sitting back going, oh, that's because mom and dad loved them.
• 44:30
  SPEAKER_03: Yep.
• 44:31
  SPEAKER_03: Uh love that it's um powerful answer, um, powerful advice.
• 44:37
  SPEAKER_03: Um I think that you know, if if I could go back, I I would love to start, you know, getting my kids into like finance and doing that.
• 44:47
  SPEAKER_03: And um, you know, they've been you know, the job they work on Cuddy Hunk Island.
• 44:51
  SPEAKER_03: We go in the summers and they'll work like on a lobster farm or they'll work on the raw bar, they'll do mow lawns and um even like some sometimes now my son will caddy, which is like the best job ever because it's like social skills, you know, carrying a bag for four hours.
• 45:05
  SPEAKER_03: Um, some of these guys he caddies for have some funds and so they tip well.
• 45:09
  SPEAKER_03: And so it's a instead of spending you know eight hours unloading a moving band like I had to do for five days straight, he gets to go hang out the golf course, talk to an executive, ask great questions, you know, build a network.
• 45:21
  SPEAKER_03: Um so he's put setting himself up for success.
• 45:23
  SPEAKER_03: So it's it's fun to see the kids go.
• 45:25
  SPEAKER_02: I'd be interested to notice, frick it back on you.
• 45:28
  SPEAKER_02: Tell me about some of your jobs growing up that you know, and how did you end up in our world?
• 45:34
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah, you know, because nobody ever chose.
• 45:37
  SPEAKER_02: I'm gonna tell you right now, it's an interview question I still use, you know, why did you get into ICD staffing and solutions?
• 45:42
  SPEAKER_02: It's not a checkbox as your senior year in high school, your guidance counselor doesn't offer it.
• 45:47
  SPEAKER_02: So, what did Casey do growing up?
• 45:49
  SPEAKER_02: And then why this?
• 45:51
  SPEAKER_03: Or why it was this?
• 45:52
  SPEAKER_03: Look at look at Adam just turning the get turning making the the guest, making the host uh answer questions I love.
• 45:59
  SPEAKER_03: So I don't think I've ever said that before.
• 46:00
  SPEAKER_03: So I um I was working at a company called Barcodes West, and they were a labeling company, and I called them stickers, and my boss like, no, they're labels.
• 46:09
  SPEAKER_03: I'm like, they're stickers, which showed my maturity level.
• 46:13
  SPEAKER_03: And uh they just said you had to make a ton of phone calls, and I was making a ton of phone calls, and I was selling stuff, but no one in the company could describe the commission report.
• 46:22
  SPEAKER_03: It was just like you had to have calculus, 500-level courses plus a PhD and a pilot's license to understand what the hell and it did not make sense.
• 46:29
  SPEAKER_03: And then I remember um my uh my buddy Kelly Hansen, who's still you know, K4C where we worked together at Hall Canyon, he was like forever, he's like, Jake, you gotta get into this thing, you're gonna be good at it.
• 46:40
  SPEAKER_03: I was like, what is this like contractors and and placing a contract?
• 46:43
  SPEAKER_03: I was like, I don't understand it.
• 46:44
  SPEAKER_03: Like he's like, No, you're gonna pay, you're gonna you're gonna be the one to go meet the clients, and then they're gonna work with the recruiters.
• 46:50
  SPEAKER_03: I was like, it just did not make sense for because I just, you know, and uh and then I remember going to my boss, and I at the time, this is I've been there about 10 months, and I was getting ready for my one-year review, and I said, he asked me to think about my goals.
• 47:02
  SPEAKER_03: I said, Well, I can already tell you what they are.
• 47:03
  SPEAKER_03: I said, I want to double my salary, I want to be in front of the customer, I don't want to just be on the phone, I'm gonna go meet people because I think I can I have the personality where I can build relationships.
• 47:10
  SPEAKER_03: He's like, Yeah, those are pretty aggressive goals for someone your age, Casey.
• 47:12
  SPEAKER_03: Why don't you go think about it when you come back from my review?
• 47:15
  SPEAKER_03: Let me know.
• 47:16
  SPEAKER_03: And right then, then I was like, this is not the place for me.
• 47:18
  SPEAKER_03: And so then I told my buddy Kelly, I was like, yeah, this whole Kenyan thing, yeah, I'll go interview with them.
• 47:23
  SPEAKER_03: So I interviewed nine times, and uh they kept telling me we just don't think you could, you know, not sure if you have the right skill set, you're too green, which you don't tell a division two quarterback you can't do something because we have a chip on our shoulder.
• 47:34
  SPEAKER_03: And I was like, F you, I can, uh, which I didn't know how, but in my mind I was gonna like to similar to you, outwork them.
• 47:40
  SPEAKER_03: And, you know, right guy, right time, right place.
• 47:43
  SPEAKER_03: Three months later, you know, Angela Ronica and Lise Crawford, who hired me, the very first ones, uh, was supposed to be a contractor for six months.
• 47:50
  SPEAKER_03: So I took a I left a full-time job to take a contract hourly sales job making$16 an hour.
• 47:55
  SPEAKER_03: And I thought I was loaded.
• 47:57
  SPEAKER_03: It's like this is sick.
• 47:58
  SPEAKER_03: I had to freaking Mazda B2200 with sandbags in the back, studded tires.
• 48:02
  SPEAKER_03: Let's go.
• 48:03
  SPEAKER_03: You know, and uh but I I was there for 20 years and you know, long went through the acquisition with K Force bought Hall Canyon, almost went to Microsoft, so glad I stayed, met some amazing people, and then when my time at K Force ended, and I decided to figure out what's next.
• 48:19
  SPEAKER_03: And I always wanted to write a book, did that, always wanted to start a podcast, did that, and then this coaching and speaking journey that found that found me.
• 48:26
  SPEAKER_03: And so uh it's I could not be more grateful for where I'm at at this stage of life because you know, you know, an age where I can be flexible with my schedule and work my schedule go around to go see my son play in college and watch his golf events, whether he plays great, does bat, doesn't matter.
• 48:42
  SPEAKER_03: I said the things I'm gonna guarantee when you don't play well, I'll love you the same and the sun will come up.
• 48:47
  SPEAKER_03: Unless we get nuked by somebody, then it's not.
• 48:49
  SPEAKER_03: But most likely it's probably not gonna happen.
• 48:52
  SPEAKER_03: Um, and so for me, it's like, yeah, that's this the staffing industry was like the perfect job for me because it's like I think playing quarter, it was like playing quarterback at times, um, building relationships with people, all different like walks of life.
• 49:03
  SPEAKER_03: You know, football, I was in a locker room with black, white, Samoan, you know, everything.
• 49:09
  SPEAKER_03: And you gotta learn to think on your feet.
• 49:11
  SPEAKER_03: You gotta learn to fight, you gotta learn to compete.
• 49:13
  SPEAKER_03: Same thing in staffing, same thing in sales.
• 49:16
  SPEAKER_03: Um, you know, these are these are stories I like to share with my kids.
• 49:19
  SPEAKER_03: You know, and now when they're older, they really start to understand.
• 49:21
  SPEAKER_03: And so I think um kind of bringing it back to you, Adam, like all these things that we've talked about today and all these stories that you've gone through, the ups, the downs, have you been able to share these stories with your kids to kind of get in perspective on what what a Dan life is for dad?
• 49:37
  SPEAKER_02: A short answer would be yes.
• 49:40
  SPEAKER_02: I don't know if some of the times I've shared things if they were listening.
• 49:44
  SPEAKER_02: You know what I mean?
• 49:45
  SPEAKER_02: Sometimes with the kids.
• 49:46
  SPEAKER_02: Sometimes I might have forced it into what I thought might have had a better impact.
• 49:51
  SPEAKER_02: And I've noticed over the last probably year and a half or so, uh, I am listening so much more.
• 49:59
  SPEAKER_02: And I've practiced listening because look at I talk a lot.
• 50:02
  SPEAKER_02: Everyone who knows me knows I talk a lot.
• 50:04
  SPEAKER_02: I've practiced listening, but I've become so much better with the family just because I feel like that's that's what they want at dinner.
• 50:11
  SPEAKER_02: They don't want lectures from dad.
• 50:13
  SPEAKER_02: They they've made it clear, you know, we're sick of being lectured, so it's not about lecture.
• 50:18
  SPEAKER_02: If there's an opportunity to tell a story and how it might impact them or something, I'll use it.
• 50:22
  SPEAKER_02: But my time will come when they want to hear more stories.
• 50:25
  SPEAKER_02: You know, right now it's just listening and to them.
• 50:28
  SPEAKER_02: And I think that my relationship has improved so much uh because I'm a better listener.
• 50:34
  SPEAKER_02: Um, you know, I always was the guy that thought I had to solve everything.
• 50:38
  SPEAKER_02: And so where what where did that come up?
• 50:40
  SPEAKER_02: What book?
• 50:41
  SPEAKER_02: I don't know.
• 50:42
  SPEAKER_02: But asking that question, do you want me just to listen or do you want me to solve?
• 50:48
  SPEAKER_02: And Adam of old was always I had to solve, had to solve, had to solve.
• 50:52
  SPEAKER_02: And I think it was with the wife I realized a better husband sometimes just needed to listen.
• 50:56
  SPEAKER_02: And I started applying that at home, and it's just been so much better.
• 51:01
  SPEAKER_02: Um, so good.
• 51:02
  SPEAKER_02: I got plenty of time for my stories.
• 51:04
  SPEAKER_02: Like I said, this will be on forever now.
• 51:06
  SPEAKER_02: I got a few YouTube things out there that are still on that they can look up if they want.
• 51:10
  SPEAKER_02: Occasionally someone finds it.
• 51:11
  SPEAKER_02: It's like, did you know?
• 51:12
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah, I remember getting the makeup on for that many years ago.
• 51:15
  SPEAKER_02: That's funny.
• 51:17
  SPEAKER_03: Um, if you were as we get ready to wrap here, um, it's been awesome talking to you and thank you again for for spending time with us today.
• 51:26
  SPEAKER_02: I can't believe you got the flagpole story out of me.
• 51:29
  SPEAKER_03: Hey, let's go.
• 51:30
  SPEAKER_03: Let's go.
• 51:31
  SPEAKER_03: Um if people want to learn more about Ronstad and the work you do, um, maybe for someone that has no idea about Ronstadt.
• 51:39
  SPEAKER_03: What to I'll give you a chance to take a minute or two to talk about what you and your guy, your company does and how can people learn more about you?
• 51:46
  SPEAKER_02: Well, many moons ago, I had to explain it to my mom what I did.
• 51:49
  SPEAKER_02: I said, I'm the Jerry McGuire for IT professionals.
• 51:52
  SPEAKER_02: You know, that was when it was just staffing.
• 51:55
  SPEAKER_02: Um, now it's you know, it's eerily similar to what I grew up doing.
• 52:00
  SPEAKER_02: You know, I was in mechanical contracting.
• 52:02
  SPEAKER_02: Uh my uncles ran the firm.
• 52:05
  SPEAKER_02: And when I graduated college, I had to have knee surgery right away.
• 52:08
  SPEAKER_02: And so I helped them.
• 52:10
  SPEAKER_02: Turns out one of my uncles getting divorced, I helped them start a new company from scratch.
• 52:14
  SPEAKER_02: So went in the office, bought the accounting software, and then I looked at, oh, you're paying these people 70 bucks an hour, you're billing the client 90, you got 108 people working.
• 52:23
  SPEAKER_02: I was generating reports and so and interviewing with new Boston Systems and Sapphire and seeing, oh, this is the same thing.
• 52:30
  SPEAKER_02: You know, so I definitely wasn't uh completely immune to understanding what the business was.
• 52:37
  SPEAKER_02: Um, but for Ronstadt Digital, Ronstadt Technologies, you know, we we have a unique space in the market.
• 52:45
  SPEAKER_02: We are not Accenture, uh, Deloitte McKinsey with that SI, you know, end-to-end strategy.
• 52:50
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah, can we do it?
• 52:51
  SPEAKER_02: Can we be more flexible?
• 52:52
  SPEAKER_02: Great.
• 52:53
  SPEAKER_02: JP Morgan's not gonna choose us for that right now.
• 52:55
  SPEAKER_02: They got those executive relationships.
• 52:57
  SPEAKER_02: There's those mid-sized firms that need the VIP treatment with the skills that are not gonna get it from those big boys, I think.
• 53:04
  SPEAKER_02: So there's a space there for me.
• 53:06
  SPEAKER_02: Um, in terms of who we are and what made Ronstad a recruiting firm at heart.
• 53:11
  SPEAKER_02: 60 years.
• 53:12
  SPEAKER_02: And when it comes time to it, most of these projects fail because they don't have the right people.
• 53:17
  SPEAKER_02: You can't find the people.
• 53:19
  SPEAKER_02: That's where I put us up against anyone.
• 53:21
  SPEAKER_02: If it's out there, the tools, the investments, the AI, you name it, the people, uh, gives us a better chance to find it.
• 53:28
  SPEAKER_02: I think the reason that I've continued to succeed is I've partnered well with my delivery.
• 53:34
  SPEAKER_02: Uh, I treat them just like you know, part of my team.
• 53:37
  SPEAKER_02: And we have delivered.
• 53:38
  SPEAKER_02: I got you know huge accounts, you know, hundreds of people that I'm closing more than 50% of every opportunity that comes in the door in a competitive playing field.
• 53:48
  SPEAKER_02: It's not like these are exclusively ours.
• 53:50
  SPEAKER_02: It's the processes, it's the recruiting, it's understanding it, the continuous investments.
• 53:54
  SPEAKER_02: It's nice to have a$27 billion firm behind you investing in all the tools and helping you be better.
• 54:01
  SPEAKER_02: Um, yes, can we offer flexible talent solutions all around the world?
• 54:06
  SPEAKER_02: Look, you know, I love putting it all in New York, US.
• 54:08
  SPEAKER_02: I get to see all the people, it's great.
• 54:10
  SPEAKER_02: But at the end of the day, is that the most competitive solution sometimes?
• 54:13
  SPEAKER_02: So, yeah, I just got back from India, you know, signing up a bunch of accounts in India.
• 54:17
  SPEAKER_02: I want to have the same experience uh around the world.
• 54:21
  SPEAKER_02: And if you do it right, you can.
• 54:24
  SPEAKER_02: Um, and you can deliver.
• 54:25
  SPEAKER_02: So we we do have a unique space.
• 54:27
  SPEAKER_02: It's definitely not for everyone.
• 54:29
  SPEAKER_02: I mean, it is a grind, right?
• 54:31
  SPEAKER_02: And as soon as you let your foot off that gas pedal, boom, you're gonna get passed by the competition.
• 54:36
  SPEAKER_02: Uh, so you have to want to grind forever.
• 54:38
  SPEAKER_02: And anyone who thinks they can coast, there's only one way to coast.
• 54:42
  SPEAKER_02: It's downhill.
• 54:43
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah, and so that was one thing I wish someone told me early on.
• 54:46
  SPEAKER_02: I said, Adam, when you get into this until you're out of it, it is gonna be pedaled down.
• 54:50
  SPEAKER_02: Some people love it, some people don't.
• 54:53
  SPEAKER_02: Um, again, I know that it's a crowded field.
• 54:57
  SPEAKER_02: I know that the differences are minor and it comes down to people, and that's where you know I've been doing it a long time with the same firm.
• 55:04
  SPEAKER_02: A lot of the big references, just do it honest and ethically, and the world will set you free, pal.
• 55:09
  SPEAKER_03: Love it.
• 55:10
  SPEAKER_03: Well, we'll make sure this is all linked in the show notes so people can learn more about you and Ronstad and your amazing team.
• 55:16
  SPEAKER_03: Um, as we get ready to wrap, um I want to I want to take you into what I call the lightning round.
• 55:25
  SPEAKER_03: And uh, but before I do that, um, I want to say if you were to summarize everything we've talked about, and that dads could take, you know, maybe three words or three themes that they can apply uh in their own life as a dad.
• 55:39
  SPEAKER_03: Tell me what comes to mind.
• 55:41
  SPEAKER_02: I still love that this too will pass.
• 55:44
  SPEAKER_02: You know, as a dad, you have some tough days, you have some wonderful days.
• 55:48
  SPEAKER_02: Just know this too will pass.
• 55:49
  SPEAKER_02: You know, on those hardest days, do not take it out on the people you love the most.
• 55:53
  SPEAKER_02: You know, that's the last people you intend to do it.
• 55:55
  SPEAKER_02: But if you can just take a breath and think about it from time to time and slow down, man, it's amazing that you would never choose to intentionally do harm to these people.
• 56:04
  SPEAKER_02: So if you can see it, think it, then you won't do it.
• 56:07
  SPEAKER_02: So this too will pass is something that I use in my head often.
• 56:11
  SPEAKER_02: Um, and then I'm still, you know, the golden rule.
• 56:14
  SPEAKER_02: Treat everybody how you want to be treated.
• 56:16
  SPEAKER_02: You know, I look at honesty, karma comes back.
• 56:21
  SPEAKER_02: You know, I've seen people lie, still cheat, and I used to get upset about it.
• 56:25
  SPEAKER_02: Um, but looking back, I'm like, wow, it catches up to you.
• 56:29
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
• 56:29
  SPEAKER_02: And at the end of the day, I still carry a poem around in my notebook that helped me get through my first couple of years, The Man in the Glass.
• 56:36
  SPEAKER_02: I mean, essentially the summary is at the end of the day, it doesn't matter what anyone else thinks.
• 56:40
  SPEAKER_02: If you can look in that mirror and feel like that you're a straight up, stand-up, honest, ethical person, then everything will set itself.
• 56:46
  SPEAKER_02: And so, you know, stop comparing yourself to everyone else, control what you control, do it honest and ethically, and it's an easy job, easy life.
• 56:53
  SPEAKER_03: Simple but hard, um, but by very wise words, my man.
• 56:58
  SPEAKER_03: Um, obviously, I'm I have a passion about the golden rule, chapter one of my book.
• 57:01
  SPEAKER_03: And but I love this two will pass.
• 57:03
  SPEAKER_03: I'm actually gonna share that with my son uh because he had a tough day on the golf course yesterday.
• 57:09
  SPEAKER_03: And uh I always tell him when I think I said it before, I'll say it again, like whether you have a good day or bad day, I do I want you to play well?
• 57:15
  SPEAKER_03: 100% I do, buddy, but I still gonna love you the probably more the next day, and the sun's gonna come up.
• 57:20
  SPEAKER_03: And so when you go through, and there's another quote I love is which is um tough times won't last, but tough people do.
• 57:26
  SPEAKER_03: Love that quote.
• 57:27
  SPEAKER_02: Um Michael Jordan quote about missing you know 20,000 shots and missing 6,000 game winning, but he keeps shooting them.
• 57:35
  SPEAKER_02: You know, you don't do it to become Michael Jordan if you fall if you give up when you fail.
• 57:39
  SPEAKER_02: Right.
• 57:40
  SPEAKER_02: Failure is the best you failed.
• 57:42
  SPEAKER_02: Awesome.
• 57:42
  SPEAKER_02: Now you've learned.
• 57:44
  SPEAKER_03: Try not to do the same thing again.
• 57:46
  SPEAKER_02: Having that mentality as a 16-year-old is difficult.
• 57:49
  SPEAKER_02: As an 18-year-old is difficult.
• 57:50
  SPEAKER_03: 100%.
• 57:52
  SPEAKER_03: Okay, it's time to go in the lightning round.
• 57:54
  SPEAKER_03: This is where I show you the negative hits of taking too many hits in college, not bong hits, but football hits.
• 57:58
  SPEAKER_03: Uh, your job is to answer these questions as quickly as you can.
• 58:01
  SPEAKER_03: My job is to hopefully get a giggle out of you.
• 58:04
  SPEAKER_03: Okay.
• 58:06
  SPEAKER_03: Um, when you played football in high school, you were considered the Eric Dickerson of uh high school football.
• 58:13
  SPEAKER_02: No, Henry Elard.
• 58:16
  SPEAKER_03: Okay.
• 58:17
  SPEAKER_03: Um if I was to go into your phone right now, what song might surprise me that you listen to?
• 58:24
  SPEAKER_02: Uh The Outfield, Your Love.
• 58:26
  SPEAKER_02: Josie's on a vacation far away.
• 58:29
  SPEAKER_03: Josie's on a vacation far away.
• 58:32
  SPEAKER_03: Oh, there we go.
• 58:34
  SPEAKER_03: I like it.
• 58:34
  SPEAKER_03: Okay.
• 58:35
  SPEAKER_03: Um, if you if I was to come to your house for dinner tonight, what will we what will we have?
• 58:39
  SPEAKER_02: Tonight happens to be pasta and meatballs.
• 58:42
  SPEAKER_02: Oh, I love meat the balls.
• 58:44
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
• 58:45
  SPEAKER_02: So good.
• 58:45
  SPEAKER_02: Trader Joe's, though, not a homemade.
• 58:47
  SPEAKER_02: Trader Joe's meatballs, Rayo's sauce, and angel hair.
• 58:51
  SPEAKER_03: Love it.
• 58:51
  SPEAKER_03: Sounds delish.
• 58:53
  SPEAKER_03: Uh, favorite comedy movie of all time is comedy.
• 58:57
  SPEAKER_02: I'll go with initial thought.
• 58:59
  SPEAKER_02: That's probably up there, but dumb and dumber, I am a huge Jim Carrey fan.
• 59:02
  SPEAKER_02: I thought that guy was supremely talented.
• 59:04
  SPEAKER_03: Sure, tell me there's a chance.
• 59:08
  SPEAKER_03: Solid movie.
• 59:09
  SPEAKER_02: I mean, you can go into Step Brothers, Anchor Man, and there's so many, you know, wedding crashers that are just so good.
• 59:15
  SPEAKER_03: I'm more of an old school 80s guy.
• 59:17
  SPEAKER_03: Um, I just watched the John Candy documentary on Amazon.
• 59:21
  SPEAKER_03: I like me.
• 59:22
  SPEAKER_03: Yes, so good.
• 59:24
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah.
• 59:24
  SPEAKER_03: Uh I'm a huge John Candy fan.
• 59:26
  SPEAKER_03: He had so many good movies.
• 59:28
  SPEAKER_03: So many good movies.
• 59:29
  SPEAKER_02: Like John Candy, like Robin Williams.
• 59:30
  SPEAKER_02: I liked him a lot.
• 59:31
  SPEAKER_03: Oh, yeah.
• 59:32
  SPEAKER_03: Morgan Mindy.
• 59:34
  SPEAKER_03: We just dated ourselves right there.
• 59:36
  SPEAKER_03: Um, if if you were to take your wife on vacation, sorry, kids are staying home.
• 59:39
  SPEAKER_03: Where are you taking her?
• 59:41
  SPEAKER_02: Uh, she's probably going to like Fiji or some beach.
• 59:44
  SPEAKER_02: She is a beach woman.
• 59:45
  SPEAKER_02: You know, if her feet's in the sand, she's a happy person.
• 59:48
  SPEAKER_02: That sounds nice.
• 59:49
  SPEAKER_02: I'm trying to think of where we haven't been.
• 59:51
  SPEAKER_02: We've definitely uh enjoyed the travel.
• 59:53
  SPEAKER_02: I know you just had someone on recently about travel and experiences.
• 59:56
  SPEAKER_02: I didn't grow up with those.
• 59:58
  SPEAKER_02: She did, uh, but thank God.
• 1:00:00
  SPEAKER_02: She has implemented in our family.
• 1:00:01
  SPEAKER_02: It becomes a joke how much we travel.
• 1:00:04
  SPEAKER_02: But you know, if we're fortunate enough to do it, so I do appreciate the experiences, even though I push back sometimes on her because you know I gotta pay for it all.
• 1:00:14
  SPEAKER_03: Love it.
• 1:00:15
  SPEAKER_03: Um, if there was to be a book written about your life, tell me the title.
• 1:00:18
  SPEAKER_03: Damned if you do, damned if you don't.
• 1:00:21
  SPEAKER_03: Okay.
• 1:00:22
  SPEAKER_03: Like it.
• 1:00:22
  SPEAKER_03: That's the first.
• 1:00:23
  SPEAKER_03: We've never heard that one before.
• 1:00:24
  SPEAKER_03: Now, Adam, damned if you do, damned if you don't, is selling out everywhere.
• 1:00:29
  SPEAKER_03: Every airport, every airport I go to, it's empty, empty shelves.
• 1:00:33
  SPEAKER_03: I went on, I logged on to Amazon, they're out.
• 1:00:36
  SPEAKER_03: Log dog to Barnes Noble, they're out.
• 1:00:38
  SPEAKER_03: So now Hulu and Netflix and all the other big media outlets who make movies, they've heard about this Adam Belinsky cat, and they want to make a movie out of out of Dan Biff You Do, Dan Biffy Don't, but you cannot be the starring character.
• 1:00:51
  SPEAKER_03: So tell me who's gonna star you in this critically acclaimed hit new movie from Hollywood.
• 1:00:55
  SPEAKER_03: Ooh.
• 1:00:57
  SPEAKER_02: Is it 25, 30 year old Adam?
• 1:01:00
  SPEAKER_02: Is it Adam of the Buddha?
• 1:01:01
  SPEAKER_02: You get a pick, man.
• 1:01:02
  SPEAKER_03: You're the casting director.
• 1:01:05
  SPEAKER_02: I'll go with Tom Cruise, only because my boss's wife said I looked like Tom Cruise last year when I had my hair slicked back.
• 1:01:12
  SPEAKER_02: Oh man, did it make me feel great?
• 1:01:14
  SPEAKER_03: There we go.
• 1:01:14
  SPEAKER_02: I got Jim Carrey growing up a lot.
• 1:01:17
  SPEAKER_02: Uh, I was on a cruise uh and uh this people came up barely speaking English and looked at me, go, James Carey.
• 1:01:25
  SPEAKER_02: And you know, I was at the piano bar throwing dollars in the thing, drinking martinis, having fun with everybody, and I grabbed their napkin and wrote James Carrey.
• 1:01:33
  SPEAKER_02: So thank you very much.
• 1:01:34
  SPEAKER_02: Alrighty then, get out of here.
• 1:01:35
  SPEAKER_02: And oh, it just became like everywhere I went.
• 1:01:38
  SPEAKER_02: People thought I looked like Jim Carrey for a few years because I my hair goes up and it was fun.
• 1:01:42
  SPEAKER_02: So I enjoyed that too.
• 1:01:44
  SPEAKER_03: Love it.
• 1:01:45
  SPEAKER_03: Okay, and then last and most important question, tell me two words that would describe your wife.
• 1:01:49
  SPEAKER_03: Authentically beautiful.
• 1:01:51
  SPEAKER_03: Boom.
• 1:01:51
  SPEAKER_03: Lightning ground is complete.
• 1:01:53
  SPEAKER_03: Uh fantastic story.
• 1:01:55
  SPEAKER_03: I'm so grateful that you decided to do this, man.
• 1:01:57
  SPEAKER_03: I mean, I'm what I'm most excited about is the hundreds of employees that you've impacted for 26, 27 years.
• 1:02:04
  SPEAKER_03: They're gonna learn more about Adam.
• 1:02:06
  SPEAKER_03: And I would be willing to bet that there's gonna be a lot more connection that comes of this, that uh relationships, new relationships will be formed uh internally or externally.
• 1:02:15
  SPEAKER_03: And um I'm I'm grateful for you in many ways, brothers.
• 1:02:19
  SPEAKER_03: I'm grateful for our paths across.
• 1:02:21
  SPEAKER_03: And I'm excited to hopefully have a chance to meet you in person uh when when the time is right.
• 1:02:26
  SPEAKER_03: But thank you again for spending time with us on the quarterback dot cast.
• 1:02:29
  SPEAKER_03: And I know that we've impacted uh a father or two uh with your wisdom, but I appreciate everything you're doing, brother.
• 1:02:34
  SPEAKER_03: Keep it up, great work.
• 1:02:35
  SPEAKER_02: I appreciate it, Casey.
• 1:02:37
  SPEAKER_02: It's no secret.
• 1:02:37
  SPEAKER_02: Uh you've had a huge impact on me, um, positively impacted my mind, my future.
• 1:02:42
  SPEAKER_02: So I appreciate it right back at you.
• 1:02:44
  SPEAKER_03: Awesome.
• 1:02:45
  SPEAKER_03: Take it easy, bud.
• 1:02:46
  SPEAKER_03: Thank you.