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The Super Funny One With Jim Jefferies · Untraditionally Lala

• 0:00
  Speaker 1: You can live without taste and touch. They're bullshit ones.
• 0:03
  Speaker 1: You're just saying in the earrings of the No one
• 0:05
  Speaker 1: even knows what the fifth one is emotions.
• 0:10
  Speaker 2: I don't know, fear. It's I can live without smell. Smell, smell, smell.
• 0:17
  Speaker 1: I would prefer to not have smell. If I work
• 0:20
  Speaker 1: up without a sense of smell for the rest of
• 0:22
  Speaker 1: your life, that would be a blessing.
• 0:27
  Speaker 3: Welcome, Jim Jeffries, Thank you. You're so welcome. I'm a
• 0:30
  Speaker 3: little intimidated because you're like an actual talented human.
• 0:34
  Speaker 1: Oh, comedian, that's that's hardly.
• 0:36
  Speaker 2: That's the hardest. I feel like that's the hardest profession.
• 0:39
  Speaker 1: That's what they say, that's what they say. But this
• 0:41
  Speaker 1: hearted job, surely.
• 0:43
  Speaker 3: I mean, I'm impressed. You've got an impressive resume. I
• 0:46
  Speaker 3: love your stand up.
• 0:47
  Speaker 1: Thank you.
• 0:47
  Speaker 3: Your your ship on Netflix is absolutely fantastic. And I
• 0:50
  Speaker 3: don't want to say that, like I know good comedy,
• 0:54
  Speaker 3: but like I know, fucking good comedy. Not everybody is
• 0:57
  Speaker 3: for me. You're for me. I love this you brought.
• 1:01
  Speaker 3: Your stunning wife is beautiful.
• 1:04
  Speaker 1: She all the jokes are made about her. She gets
• 1:07
  Speaker 1: dragged over the colls in my stand up these days.
• 1:10
  Speaker 3: I mean, I always there's so much I want to
• 1:13
  Speaker 3: talk to you about. You're the first comedian that we've
• 1:15
  Speaker 3: had on the podcast besides myself. Great at least I laugh.
• 1:23
  Speaker 3: I'm like, I'm so fucking funny. Okay. So you have
• 1:28
  Speaker 3: your stand ups that you do. You you're a writer,
• 1:32
  Speaker 3: you have or how to sitcom on FX Legit, and
• 1:37
  Speaker 3: then you stepped into hosting. Is this your first? The
• 1:42
  Speaker 3: Snake on the.
• 1:43
  Speaker 1: Snake is my first American game show that I've hosted,
• 1:46
  Speaker 1: but the One Percent Club, which actually is the intro
• 1:48
  Speaker 1: the leading for the Snake on America, which is hosted
• 1:50
  Speaker 1: by John McHale. I host the Australian version of that.
• 1:54
  Speaker 1: So so I do a little bit of TV and
• 1:57
  Speaker 1: I hosted The Jim Jeffrey Show as well, which.
• 1:59
  Speaker 3: Was okay, So this isn't like your first your first
• 2:03
  Speaker 3: hosting gig of a game show.
• 2:05
  Speaker 1: It's my first sort of reality show hosting thing like
• 2:08
  Speaker 1: the other shows, straight question answer type of thing where
• 2:11
  Speaker 1: I'm actually in the jungle and people are doing activities
• 2:15
  Speaker 1: and eating bugs and all that crap, you know what
• 2:17
  Speaker 1: I mean. Like that's my first type of that job.
• 2:19
  Speaker 2: It's like a little fear factor in it.
• 2:21
  Speaker 1: There's a little fear factor, there's a little big brother,
• 2:23
  Speaker 1: there's a little surviveor the secret source of the snake,
• 2:28
  Speaker 1: and the snake's brilliant. By the way, if you haven't
• 2:29
  Speaker 1: seen The Snake yet, go to Hulu watch it beings.
• 2:33
  Speaker 1: The first three episodes. I'll be honest with the first
• 2:35
  Speaker 1: episode's the worst one because they're explaining everything, So get
• 2:39
  Speaker 1: through that. One second one's been I just watched the
• 2:41
  Speaker 1: third one. The third one's ace right. But the big
• 2:43
  Speaker 1: secret with the game is we've seen a lot of
• 2:45
  Speaker 1: shows where people have to do discusting tasks to get
• 2:48
  Speaker 1: through the next round or whatever. You're in the task,
• 2:50
  Speaker 1: you become the snake. And then instead of having like
• 2:52
  Speaker 1: a voting off ceremony at the end of the show,
• 2:54
  Speaker 1: they haven't. They call a saving ceremony. So the person
• 2:57
  Speaker 1: who's the snake gets to save one person. That sets
• 2:59
  Speaker 1: up a chain the actually nice saving another person, niceave
• 3:01
  Speaker 1: another person. So there's no backstabbing. It's all front stabbing.
• 3:05
  Speaker 1: It's like you say to someone, I'm gonna save you,
• 3:07
  Speaker 1: and then you save another person and you see that
• 3:09
  Speaker 1: actual what the fuck look on someone's face, like you
• 3:12
  Speaker 1: get to see the broken heart and real time. It's brilliant.
• 3:15
  Speaker 4: It would be so bad at this game because we
• 3:19
  Speaker 4: watched two, we didn't see the third.
• 3:22
  Speaker 3: The third one just came out.
• 3:24
  Speaker 1: One comes out tonight tonight.
• 3:25
  Speaker 4: Okay, so we watched the two, but I really enjoyed
• 3:28
  Speaker 4: it because like Traders, you were persuaded by people to
• 3:32
  Speaker 4: vote a certain way, and this I.
• 3:33
  Speaker 3: Felt like, you don't know who the trade is.
• 3:36
  Speaker 1: Big, big stuff going down. Episode three. This episode three,
• 3:39
  Speaker 1: it's old treachery the whole time.
• 3:41
  Speaker 3: Let me tell you. When they had to drink those drinks, yeah.
• 3:44
  Speaker 1: I was vomited. I had to.
• 3:46
  Speaker 3: Turn take the medallion. I don't want it to count
• 3:49
  Speaker 3: me out elimination before I even started.
• 3:52
  Speaker 1: I can tell because when this comes out, people might
• 3:54
  Speaker 1: have seen the third one or whatever. But the next
• 3:55
  Speaker 1: one is people solving jigsaw puzzles with thousands of carcos
• 4:00
  Speaker 1: on their face with the hole just kind of thing
• 4:02
  Speaker 1: they have to yell to the other person, like one
• 4:05
  Speaker 1: person has the key and one person has to solve,
• 4:08
  Speaker 1: and they've just got cockroaches, so you have to yell out.
• 4:10
  Speaker 1: So this cockroache is calling over you with your mouth open.
• 4:13
  Speaker 1: And people got very upset with that one. But it's like, look,
• 4:16
  Speaker 1: I tell you what, man, It's like, it's like when
• 4:19
  Speaker 1: you show up to get a job in your game show.
• 4:21
  Speaker 1: Ho She like, what am I doing today? I'm pouring
• 4:24
  Speaker 1: I'm pouring cockroachors on a priest. I mean, I thought.
• 4:28
  Speaker 4: He was going to be me too. I watching two,
• 4:32
  Speaker 4: I was like, will he get through?
• 4:34
  Speaker 1: Yeah, we didn't think he was going to get Then
• 4:36
  Speaker 1: something happens in the next one. I can't like.
• 4:38
  Speaker 2: I mean, I'm excited to watch three.
• 4:40
  Speaker 3: I'm feeling like the Colt's cheerleader because she's very under
• 4:46
  Speaker 3: the radar, right, she's not a threat to anybody. And
• 4:51
  Speaker 3: then who's the one? What's the girl's name? She has
• 4:55
  Speaker 3: it down to a science right now, Catherine.
• 5:00
  Speaker 1: Keep watching Catherine as the ways go by, because Catherine's.
• 5:04
  Speaker 3: That they get you, I truly want She's gonna need
• 5:06
  Speaker 3: the money. She's being fired from her job one hundred percent, don't.
• 5:10
  Speaker 1: I don't know what she quite, she said. I talked
• 5:13
  Speaker 1: to her done I do on my podcast. She says
• 5:15
  Speaker 1: she writes erotic novels. That's what she wants to be.
• 5:19
  Speaker 3: That trucks because she looks you dead in your eyes
• 5:22
  Speaker 3: with those blue eyes, and she's like, I'll give you
• 5:24
  Speaker 3: the medallion. I have it. However, can I tell you
• 5:27
  Speaker 3: the one thing that I the guy the robber.
• 5:31
  Speaker 1: Yeah, Brian talks about.
• 5:33
  Speaker 3: He's like bragging how he only got one counts of
• 5:36
  Speaker 3: the twenty two.
• 5:37
  Speaker 2: He was like, but they couldn't get me on the
• 5:38
  Speaker 2: other twenty.
• 5:39
  Speaker 1: He's now like in the episode three, he's sitting there
• 5:41
  Speaker 1: with the detective going biggest one. I got away with
• 5:44
  Speaker 1: half a million dollar robbery. He used to rob with
• 5:46
  Speaker 1: his father and his brother, right, so they used to
• 5:49
  Speaker 1: be like a fan. His brother would stank God and
• 5:51
  Speaker 1: him and the dad would go through and they'd go
• 5:53
  Speaker 1: get stuff done. But like Catherine Man, Catherine is playing
• 5:57
  Speaker 1: Brian in this. She said to Brian at once she goes,
• 6:01
  Speaker 1: she goes, if my dad Adver dies, I'll have you
• 6:03
  Speaker 1: walked me down the aisle. What do you mean you
• 6:05
  Speaker 1: just met him a week ago?
• 6:07
  Speaker 3: I know, but she's so believable. She's so believable.
• 6:10
  Speaker 1: Have you ever met anyone called Katherine before? Though with
• 6:13
  Speaker 1: an I haven't. I've met Kathy's. I've never met a
• 6:18
  Speaker 1: Kathy and I've never met a Keith. You see the
• 6:21
  Speaker 1: TV show in Australia Katheryn Kimy and it wasn't called
• 6:23
  Speaker 1: Kith and kim Like, you know, the best way to
• 6:27
  Speaker 1: say Katherine is to say Katherine. But as in New Zealand,
• 6:31
  Speaker 1: though all right, they're actually.
• 6:38
  Speaker 3: It is. The moment I saw that name, I was like, oh,
• 6:40
  Speaker 3: she's trouble.
• 6:41
  Speaker 1: I stuffed it up a couple of times, but yeah, no,
• 6:43
  Speaker 1: she's Look, it is a game at the end of
• 6:45
  Speaker 1: the day. It's not like TV shows you've been on,
• 6:47
  Speaker 1: where it is actually reality and people have to actually
• 6:49
  Speaker 1: get along with people, and there's something if you did
• 6:52
  Speaker 1: something underhanded to a person, that's real life right to
• 6:55
  Speaker 1: a degree. This one here. If you're doing something underhanded,
• 6:58
  Speaker 1: you have the guys of, ah, it's a game, But.
• 7:03
  Speaker 3: Do you think that when people go the fact that
• 7:05
  Speaker 3: you're capable of that. I don't care if it's a
• 7:07
  Speaker 3: game like I would have a very hard time. Some
• 7:11
  Speaker 3: people may disagree going in and creating like these these
• 7:15
  Speaker 3: ginormous lives. With the cop she's talking about, you know
• 7:20
  Speaker 3: my dad was a cop, or the detective, he was
• 7:23
  Speaker 3: a cop. Then with she's like, I come from a
• 7:29
  Speaker 3: family full of criminals.
• 7:30
  Speaker 1: Come from a family of felons.
• 7:32
  Speaker 3: That's right.
• 7:35
  Speaker 1: Family, the city a highlight.
• 7:36
  Speaker 2: This guy, what are you throwing me under the fus.
• 7:40
  Speaker 1: We had one cousin who went to prison for a
• 7:42
  Speaker 1: stink for like two months, just unpaid parking tickets.
• 7:50
  Speaker 3: No violent crimes here, but I'm wondering can that guy
• 7:53
  Speaker 3: go to jail? Still he talks about how his brother
• 7:56
  Speaker 3: was holding the gun.
• 7:58
  Speaker 1: Look, I've said a lot of things that I've done
• 8:01
  Speaker 1: on stage, taking drags, et cetera, et cetera. It's still
• 8:05
  Speaker 1: you can. You can hide behind it being a performance
• 8:07
  Speaker 1: and by the way, I haven't. You can hide behind
• 8:11
  Speaker 1: it being a performance piece, right, you can.
• 8:14
  Speaker 3: It's a game show where you lie.
• 8:15
  Speaker 1: It's a game show. It's night, it's not a court
• 8:17
  Speaker 1: of law. So so, but Brian did all those things.
• 8:22
  Speaker 1: Every time I saw Brian, I had the same watch
• 8:26
  Speaker 1: on the whole time. And Brian's like, hey, hey, he's
• 8:28
  Speaker 1: trying to shake my hand. He's trying to nick my watch.
• 8:30
  Speaker 1: Like it's a bit you know what I mean? Like
• 8:32
  Speaker 1: you guys, I reckon, I can steal your watch and
• 8:34
  Speaker 1: you don't even know it. I'm like, that's great, Brian.
• 8:36
  Speaker 1: So I just stopped touching Brian.
• 8:40
  Speaker 4: Has Brian started touching you?
• 8:42
  Speaker 1: Brian. Brian's going to be on my podcast. I'm recording
• 8:46
  Speaker 1: one this afternoon, so I will see how Brian's doing.
• 8:49
  Speaker 1: He's a fun lads.
• 8:53
  Speaker 2: He's going to shaw himself into prison.
• 8:55
  Speaker 1: I know you know what I did wrong as a host,
• 8:58
  Speaker 1: and my wife actually thinks it's quite ming. Is you
• 9:00
  Speaker 1: can very clearly tell that I have favorites. Now a
• 9:04
  Speaker 1: game show, I shouldn't have favorites so hard.
• 9:08
  Speaker 2: That's so hard to could.
• 9:11
  Speaker 1: Treat them all equally. But like when Jack won eating
• 9:14
  Speaker 1: those rantid eggs, I was like, goat some Jack.
• 9:20
  Speaker 3: I don't know how you like keep yourself from not
• 9:23
  Speaker 3: having favorites.
• 9:24
  Speaker 1: Well, okay, I had some who were my favorites. And
• 9:28
  Speaker 1: now because I only I'm only there for the challenge
• 9:30
  Speaker 1: and the saving ceremony, I'm not there all during the day.
• 9:34
  Speaker 1: So in this last this last saving ceremony goes like this,
• 9:37
  Speaker 1: they start attacking each other. On episode three, they start
• 9:40
  Speaker 1: really going into each other and I was all shocked.
• 9:43
  Speaker 1: You can see I'm standing there like this, Why isn't
• 9:47
  Speaker 1: everyone getting along like that? And now I look back
• 9:51
  Speaker 1: and it's like, because Catherine keeps.
• 9:52
  Speaker 3: Love Oh my God, I can't wait. I'm going home
• 9:56
  Speaker 3: and watch you.
• 9:57
  Speaker 1: Yeah so so yeah, so they all sort of get this.
• 10:00
  Speaker 1: Certain players that sort of try to play the game
• 10:02
  Speaker 1: with muscle Ah Brett the boxer or Derek the detective.
• 10:07
  Speaker 1: You know, those guys try to win through winning tasks
• 10:09
  Speaker 1: and actually and then there's other people who try to
• 10:11
  Speaker 1: actually play the game type of thing. But look, look,
• 10:14
  Speaker 1: we all know the priest got through by the skin
• 10:17
  Speaker 1: of his teeth or the pasta. He's not a priest
• 10:19
  Speaker 1: of the pastor the skin of his teeth. Pastor Jacob,
• 10:22
  Speaker 1: who's actually a really sweet guy. Now, I'm an atheist, right,
• 10:25
  Speaker 1: and I always find that I think I find I
• 10:28
  Speaker 1: find the dog. Thank god, you're an atheist. You are funny.
• 10:32
  Speaker 1: I'm looking forward to your Netflix special. So I'm always
• 10:38
  Speaker 1: had an aversion to the dog clouds type of thing.
• 10:41
  Speaker 2: But he was he was.
• 10:42
  Speaker 1: Kind of a sweet guy, and so afterwards he has
• 10:45
  Speaker 1: he's got his handles, I think the inclusive pasta and
• 10:49
  Speaker 1: he was like I was on the plane going back
• 10:51
  Speaker 1: with him when we were leaving Argentina and he had
• 10:54
  Speaker 1: like he had like trans rides this rides that like
• 10:57
  Speaker 1: he's very like on his t shirt. So anyway, I
• 11:03
  Speaker 1: said to him, I said, hey, look man, you know
• 11:05
  Speaker 1: I said, look, I'm an atheist. And he goes, well,
• 11:07
  Speaker 1: we have plenty of atheists in our in my parish.
• 11:11
  Speaker 1: I'm like, why would they? He goes, it's all about
• 11:15
  Speaker 1: inclusion and everyone getting along and all the type of stuff.
• 11:18
  Speaker 1: And I said, ah, well, you know, well, if I'm
• 11:20
  Speaker 1: ever in town, I'll pop on in. And then he goes,
• 11:24
  Speaker 1: We're in Orange County, and I'm.
• 11:26
  Speaker 2: Like, fuck, I'm too far.
• 11:28
  Speaker 1: I always hoping he was going to go Oklahoma and
• 11:30
  Speaker 1: be like, ah, well, very rare. I'm in Oklahoma, but
• 11:34
  Speaker 1: I could definitely get the path to Jacobs Parish and
• 11:37
  Speaker 1: join in.
• 11:37
  Speaker 3: But all the time of day, in less than an hour, yeah, exactly,
• 11:41
  Speaker 3: like in.
• 11:42
  Speaker 1: This traffic, come on, now, come on. And also, I've
• 11:44
  Speaker 1: always seen one of the privileges, like of being an atheist,
• 11:47
  Speaker 1: one of the big privileges is and it's not for
• 11:50
  Speaker 1: everyone right now. The people think people think you're going
• 11:53
  Speaker 1: to burn in hell, like people think you're.
• 11:56
  Speaker 3: That's like a Bible bumper.
• 11:57
  Speaker 1: Well that's a bump. But yeah, yes, maybe burn in
• 12:00
  Speaker 1: hell if there's a help, which there is, but if
• 12:02
  Speaker 1: there is, if there is a hit I'm going to
• 12:04
  Speaker 1: burn in hell, so let me have my Sundays off.
• 12:08
  Speaker 1: I deserve the weekend if I'm going to burn for eternity.
• 12:11
  Speaker 3: You know what, though, I understand I'm not an atheist.
• 12:16
  Speaker 1: Ah, which one are you into? Well?
• 12:18
  Speaker 3: I was raised spiritual because my mom was raised super
• 12:21
  Speaker 3: Christian Bible bumpery, and then my dad was raised Mormon.
• 12:25
  Speaker 1: Okay, so that's a great name for a gay strip
• 12:29
  Speaker 1: club in Utah. More men, More like, I just I
• 12:34
  Speaker 1: don't want to do it. I don't want to make it.
• 12:36
  Speaker 1: But if if anyone in Utah is listening for a
• 12:39
  Speaker 1: for a game mate or even like not even a
• 12:41
  Speaker 1: gay strip club like one of those thunder from now
• 12:43
  Speaker 1: Under review shows, totally, that's actually a great are Utah
• 12:47
  Speaker 1: thunder from now on strip t show? Moremon?
• 12:52
  Speaker 3: If I do it, are you going to come for
• 12:55
  Speaker 3: a cut or can I just take it all to myself?
• 12:57
  Speaker 1: No? But you let me. I get to eat for free.
• 13:01
  Speaker 1: I don't know what the food is like.
• 13:02
  Speaker 3: Can I tell you about it?
• 13:03
  Speaker 1: I can't imagine strip club food's never been at ast
• 13:06
  Speaker 1: but I can't imagine male.
• 13:07
  Speaker 2: A little strip club steak.
• 13:09
  Speaker 1: Never kids of that whipped cream with the spray you
• 13:12
  Speaker 1: reckon they got backstage. You'd have that on everything at
• 13:14
  Speaker 1: a male strip more.
• 13:15
  Speaker 3: In Utah strip clubs you have to cover vagina and
• 13:18
  Speaker 3: you have to wear pasties.
• 13:20
  Speaker 1: So it's not a strip club, is it.
• 13:22
  Speaker 3: It's not worth going technically, No, you have to wear underwear.
• 13:25
  Speaker 1: The strip cub modies will be called your wife, your wife,
• 13:32
  Speaker 1: come over here and enjoy your wife. Come on, strip club.
• 13:35
  Speaker 3: I used to go to the strip club like literally
• 13:37
  Speaker 3: every night to see my friend at Trails.
• 13:39
  Speaker 1: Okay, and you have a strip club called Trails. Trails
• 13:43
  Speaker 1: just from girls who didn't clan themselves properly and drag
• 13:46
  Speaker 1: themselves across the stage, we would Trails Trails.
• 13:52
  Speaker 4: We also had American Bush.
• 13:55
  Speaker 1: It's a good one, but too political. I had to
• 14:00
  Speaker 1: take it down. The Democrats didn't want to go in there.
• 14:04
  Speaker 3: That was fine. That was like past the airport, Oh, the.
• 14:07
  Speaker 2: One that's worth it.
• 14:09
  Speaker 1: Look, if I'm out that way, I'm already there. I
• 14:13
  Speaker 1: wouldn't make the trip. But if I've gone out there
• 14:15
  Speaker 1: to buy a dog, might stop off at American.
• 14:19
  Speaker 2: We only got to seven to eleven in that area.
• 14:21
  Speaker 1: But then you like, because that may give you buy
• 14:24
  Speaker 1: a dog, go to American Bush, go into the Strip club.
• 14:27
  Speaker 1: You won't be in there for too long because someone
• 14:28
  Speaker 1: complained about the dog being in the car. You only
• 14:30
  Speaker 1: spend fifteen minutes saving yourself money. You'll be on your
• 14:33
  Speaker 1: way home. Don't eat the food. My wife's looking at
• 14:38
  Speaker 1: me like, who is this man? I'm just saying, why
• 14:43
  Speaker 1: would I be out past the airport?
• 14:45
  Speaker 3: That's usually where the shelters are.
• 14:46
  Speaker 1: Yeah, whenever you go to buy an animal. When I
• 14:49
  Speaker 1: was a kid, there was always like I say so,
• 14:51
  Speaker 1: me and the wife. We lived in Cu City, and
• 14:54
  Speaker 1: then we still live in Cu City. And then there
• 14:55
  Speaker 1: was a the fires. Remember those fires made the news.
• 15:00
  Speaker 1: We made the news, and the fire happened, and then
• 15:05
  Speaker 1: we were in our house and there was a fire
• 15:08
  Speaker 1: near pins Bowling, which isn't far from it that someone
• 15:10
  Speaker 1: actually just set off. We thought the valley's next, you know,
• 15:13
  Speaker 1: the palisades were done.
• 15:14
  Speaker 3: We thought the valet was next totally.
• 15:15
  Speaker 1: And so so we we have three cats, but only
• 15:18
  Speaker 1: one cage. Because you never take them all to the vedic.
• 15:21
  Speaker 3: Once, No, never, you never all once.
• 15:23
  Speaker 1: You only need the one cage. We couldn't get one
• 15:26
  Speaker 1: of them into the one cage. So we just went
• 15:27
  Speaker 1: fuck it. We threw them all in. Now. I don't
• 15:30
  Speaker 1: know what people feel about Eli, Musk and Tesla's these days,
• 15:33
  Speaker 1: but thank god for hands free driving. When you got
• 15:37
  Speaker 1: three terrified cats jumping around, that's the that's where it's meant.
• 15:41
  Speaker 1: It's built for.
• 15:42
  Speaker 4: That was built for that.
• 15:45
  Speaker 3: That it's going to pull like a way most situation
• 15:47
  Speaker 3: and just like go in circles and then you're really screwed.
• 15:49
  Speaker 1: I've never used way yet.
• 15:51
  Speaker 3: Well, I don't trust anything that's like, I don't trust humans,
• 15:54
  Speaker 3: but I can trust like electronics wheelers.
• 15:56
  Speaker 1: I just thought that's good. I can remember cash cab
• 15:58
  Speaker 1: where you're getting the car and now they're on a
• 16:00
  Speaker 1: game show host because I always thought I'm not good
• 16:03
  Speaker 1: at reading and I'm not great at driving, but I'm
• 16:05
  Speaker 1: average it either. Okay, you can do cash cab, but
• 16:08
  Speaker 1: throw me in a way mo, I'll do that. There
• 16:10
  Speaker 1: you go. Oh you just don't even use me. Just
• 16:13
  Speaker 1: have a robot voice. Just have people trapped in you're
• 16:17
  Speaker 1: in cash cab.
• 16:19
  Speaker 3: No, but that's genius. You would save so much money
• 16:21
  Speaker 3: producing that show. Yeah, yeah, you don't have to pay
• 16:24
  Speaker 3: a talent fear for the host yeah.
• 16:25
  Speaker 1: And if you get the answers right, you get to
• 16:27
  Speaker 1: your destination. If you get the answers wrong, you go
• 16:30
  Speaker 1: to your mother in law's house or something I don't know,
• 16:32
  Speaker 1: somewhere you don't want to go. You go to American Bush.
• 16:38
  Speaker 1: Everyone ends up in American Bush.
• 16:40
  Speaker 4: If you get the questions for the trail that snails
• 16:43
  Speaker 4: at trails.
• 16:45
  Speaker 1: That's what I would say to my wife. I got
• 16:47
  Speaker 1: caught in the American Bush. I got into a way
• 16:49
  Speaker 1: mo cash cab. Who would make that story up?
• 16:56
  Speaker 3: No?
• 16:56
  Speaker 1: I I got all the answers wrong. None of them
• 16:59
  Speaker 1: were about this. I didn't know anything.
• 17:07
  Speaker 3: Hold on, how does that work with stand up? When
• 17:09
  Speaker 3: your wife becomes part of the bed, does she freak?
• 17:12
  Speaker 3: Do you run it past her? Or is it like surprise?
• 17:14
  Speaker 1: No? Because before her, my comedy would be more about
• 17:20
  Speaker 1: girlfriends or one night stands, or taking drugs or whatever.
• 17:25
  Speaker 1: And now I'm older and I don't do those things,
• 17:28
  Speaker 1: and I'm happily married and we've got kids, And I mean,
• 17:30
  Speaker 1: so where does the comedy come from. I'm not putting
• 17:33
  Speaker 1: myself in dangerous positions where I can get funny stories.
• 17:36
  Speaker 1: We have to rip into this one. That's the only
• 17:38
  Speaker 1: way we can do it. In my new special coming
• 17:41
  Speaker 1: out August on Netflix, which hasn't been officially ann ouncet,
• 17:44
  Speaker 1: but I do call her a racist homophobe, and I say,
• 17:49
  Speaker 1: if people drive past her in the street to yell
• 17:51
  Speaker 1: it out from the car and.
• 17:55
  Speaker 3: Oh, wow, your wife is a.
• 17:58
  Speaker 1: He's so homophobic. I did. I tried to suck one
• 18:02
  Speaker 1: cock in front of her and she was offended. Terrible person.
• 18:05
  Speaker 3: Okay, you run it back. See that's why you're a comedian.
• 18:08
  Speaker 3: Let me talk about this cancel culture.
• 18:13
  Speaker 1: My wife is uncancellable. I'm telling you, she's too good
• 18:17
  Speaker 1: a person. That's why I push it onto her.
• 18:20
  Speaker 2: If you can't cancel her, you can't cancel her.
• 18:22
  Speaker 1: You know when she's you know, when you've got too
• 18:25
  Speaker 1: many speeding tickets and then a camera catches you and
• 18:28
  Speaker 1: then you go to your like your spouse or a
• 18:30
  Speaker 1: brother or something, and you go, you're gonna have to
• 18:32
  Speaker 1: take these points for me. This is what she's doing.
• 18:35
  Speaker 1: She's getting her cancel up. So my cancel level is
• 18:38
  Speaker 1: so high that I have to push all the bad
• 18:39
  Speaker 1: things I do unto her.
• 18:41
  Speaker 3: So do you think there's a line in comedy, Then of.
• 18:44
  Speaker 1: Course there's a line in comedy, of course there's okay,
• 18:47
  Speaker 1: this is now there will be comedians and so no,
• 18:50
  Speaker 1: you should be able to joke about anything, and you
• 18:52
  Speaker 1: can if you're really good. And also people have got
• 18:56
  Speaker 1: to know that there isn't hate in you, okay if
• 18:59
  Speaker 1: they what you tell a joke as long as you
• 19:02
  Speaker 1: have a glint in your eye and you can sort
• 19:04
  Speaker 1: of okay, here's the easiest way to do. You can
• 19:08
  Speaker 1: joke about anything as long as you're completely comfortable about
• 19:13
  Speaker 1: joking about that thing whilst that subject's in the room, okay, right,
• 19:17
  Speaker 1: And if you can do it while that group of
• 19:20
  Speaker 1: people or that individual is in the room, then you
• 19:24
  Speaker 1: should be able to do it. And I've failed at
• 19:26
  Speaker 1: that plenty of times. But that's that's what you know.
• 19:28
  Speaker 1: There's jokes that I look back on where I go,
• 19:31
  Speaker 1: didn't land No, landed, but the person who was in
• 19:36
  Speaker 1: the room, and I wouldn't have had the balls to
• 19:38
  Speaker 1: say it if they were. I've recorded eleven hours of
• 19:41
  Speaker 1: stand up, right, So out of the eleven hours, there's
• 19:46
  Speaker 1: fifteen minutes where I go, Yeah, I should have done
• 19:49
  Speaker 1: things a bit differently there, you know what I mean.
• 19:51
  Speaker 1: But that's but look in anyone's career.
• 19:54
  Speaker 2: But yeah, you have to say it to understand that
• 19:56
  Speaker 2: you went past the line.
• 19:58
  Speaker 1: Well, but I don't like hurting. Innocence is the thing.
• 20:05
  Speaker 1: The thing. But like we know, as you more so
• 20:09
  Speaker 1: than me, as people who are in the public eye,
• 20:13
  Speaker 1: that you just put up with people saying shit about you.
• 20:15
  Speaker 3: That's all you do, right, Yeah, I mean there are
• 20:18
  Speaker 3: moments where you cannot win, and then there are moments
• 20:21
  Speaker 3: where you say, you know what, I'm going to take
• 20:22
  Speaker 3: the l on this. And although I don't regret the
• 20:26
  Speaker 3: entirety of what I said, there are pieces of it
• 20:29
  Speaker 3: that could have been taken out, could have been said differently.
• 20:33
  Speaker 3: And that's why I wonder at times if comedians draw
• 20:38
  Speaker 3: the line for themselves, or if the public comes into
• 20:42
  Speaker 3: play and you say, I have to remember that there
• 20:46
  Speaker 3: are people who could be directly affected by what I say.
• 20:49
  Speaker 1: For the most part, people who come and see comedy,
• 20:53
  Speaker 1: my show is horrible. If you don't know I'm joking, right,
• 21:00
  Speaker 1: not comedy, you come along and watch my stand up
• 21:02
  Speaker 1: and go you can't believe it. I've always hated when
• 21:05
  Speaker 1: someone reviews your show and then they do a transcript
• 21:07
  Speaker 1: of what you said.
• 21:08
  Speaker 3: Well, it always translates differently reads bad.
• 21:13
  Speaker 1: Yeah, it's a bad read. Yeah, if you don't have
• 21:16
  Speaker 1: the Australian accent and a little bit of a.
• 21:20
  Speaker 4: Right, well, yeah, there's emotion behind your joke is too
• 21:24
  Speaker 4: that you're not gonna see in a read. Infliction the
• 21:27
  Speaker 4: voice of everything.
• 21:30
  Speaker 3: And there are times where I'll do, like something as
• 21:32
  Speaker 3: simple as an Instagram story and I'll say fuck like
• 21:35
  Speaker 3: seventeen times. If I do just like a black screen
• 21:38
  Speaker 3: and write I do like a little asterisk or an
• 21:40
  Speaker 3: emoji where the you is, I'm like, because when you
• 21:43
  Speaker 3: see the word fuck, it just that's funny becomes more.
• 21:47
  Speaker 1: Because I'm in the process of doing my biography at
• 21:50
  Speaker 1: the moment, I have a writer working with me. It's
• 21:52
  Speaker 1: literally become like therapy. I lay on the couch and
• 21:55
  Speaker 1: I chucked the four and then I and then I
• 22:00
  Speaker 1: start talking about me life and I'm going all the
• 22:02
  Speaker 1: way through my children and my childhood and stuff like that.
• 22:05
  Speaker 1: And I was talking about me mum, and then I
• 22:06
  Speaker 1: was reading it back because then after he writes it,
• 22:08
  Speaker 1: I read it back and I edit and make it
• 22:11
  Speaker 1: sure it sounds right my voice. But he does it
• 22:15
  Speaker 1: as I've been saying it and it's just like this,
• 22:18
  Speaker 1: And then my fucking mum came over and she was
• 22:20
  Speaker 1: fucking pissed off with me for some fucking reason, now
• 22:25
  Speaker 1: me saying it, But then you read. And then my
• 22:27
  Speaker 1: fucking mother came over and she was fucking upset about
• 22:30
  Speaker 1: fucking and I was like, take all the fuckings out,
• 22:33
  Speaker 1: take all the fuckings out right, I'll do them in
• 22:37
  Speaker 1: the audio book.
• 22:38
  Speaker 3: Yes, we're going to be following along week. Something's different
• 22:43
  Speaker 3: here the.
• 22:43
  Speaker 1: Audio version that one follows on. If you're listening to
• 22:46
  Speaker 1: the audio version, you like me, you've read about two
• 22:48
  Speaker 1: books in your life. Like my wife always comes to
• 22:52
  Speaker 1: me and goes, have you ever read the book? I go,
• 22:54
  Speaker 1: is it Chris Farley or Chevy Chase's biography? Because if
• 22:57
  Speaker 1: it's not, then I haven't read it cently.
• 23:00
  Speaker 3: Only read two books, and.
• 23:03
  Speaker 1: It was the Chris Farley Show, which was with him,
• 23:07
  Speaker 1: was his passages from like David Spade and Chris Rock
• 23:10
  Speaker 1: and a Thur stuff, Wrinning Man. And I read the
• 23:11
  Speaker 1: biography of Chevy Chase and that's and part from that.
• 23:14
  Speaker 1: I listened to all your books. I watched a lot
• 23:16
  Speaker 1: of documentaries. But anyway, so my for my audiobook I
• 23:19
  Speaker 1: hate reading and I hate reading it loud. I'm really dyslexic,
• 23:22
  Speaker 1: and I it's my biggest fear in school right. And
• 23:27
  Speaker 1: when they were reading around the class and they do
• 23:28
  Speaker 1: paragraph paragraphgraph.
• 23:31
  Speaker 4: When that ship would happen, I would count out the
• 23:34
  Speaker 4: kids and then read my paragraph. So I kind of
• 23:36
  Speaker 4: like just had to memorized. And when I read, I
• 23:40
  Speaker 4: don't retain ship because I'm like.
• 23:43
  Speaker 1: Doesn't come in. I can read, but it doesn't come in.
• 23:46
  Speaker 3: That must be like people, do you have.
• 23:50
  Speaker 1: They said I did, but I don't know. I've got dyslexia,
• 23:53
  Speaker 1: and they say.
• 23:54
  Speaker 3: I'm mildly on the creative mind.
• 23:57
  Speaker 1: We've all got Look. Look look I had the park
• 24:00
  Speaker 1: in a regular spot. Okay, That's where I'm at life.
• 24:06
  Speaker 3: I like that. By the way, though, school is now
• 24:10
  Speaker 3: my AA meeting where I go to this meeting and
• 24:12
  Speaker 3: they have you read the book.
• 24:15
  Speaker 1: I'm like, you have to read it for the kids.
• 24:19
  Speaker 3: We have to read it in the in the meeting
• 24:22
  Speaker 3: with other alcoholics.
• 24:25
  Speaker 1: Oh yes, sEH, I've done that. Yes, that's a lot
• 24:27
  Speaker 1: of fun.
• 24:27
  Speaker 3: And people are like, you have to read, you have
• 24:29
  Speaker 3: to be of service. I'm like, in another way, this.
• 24:32
  Speaker 2: Seventh tradition they always give me that one.
• 24:34
  Speaker 1: AA wasn't for me, I understand, it's for a lot
• 24:38
  Speaker 1: of other people. I don't like to think about alcohol,
• 24:40
  Speaker 1: and now that I've left it behind me, I don't
• 24:43
  Speaker 1: want to revisit it. But I mindful, but I know
• 24:46
  Speaker 1: it works for different people.
• 24:47
  Speaker 3: There's no judgment here.
• 24:48
  Speaker 1: By the yeah, I found going to that actually made
• 24:50
  Speaker 1: me depressed all the time because I kept on. But
• 24:52
  Speaker 1: for other people they like And also I went to
• 24:55
  Speaker 1: AA with a group of famous comedians. Oh right, fuck
• 25:03
  Speaker 1: if those kinds don't enjoy sharing. These meetings were going
• 25:07
  Speaker 1: for three hours. There was people there who were like,
• 25:11
  Speaker 1: I haven't had a drink in twenty five years. And
• 25:15
  Speaker 1: I walked past the bar the other day and I
• 25:17
  Speaker 1: thought to myself, should I? But then I resisted, and
• 25:22
  Speaker 1: I'm like, dude, I want to hear about the guy
• 25:25
  Speaker 1: who hasn't had a drink in twenty four hours. You
• 25:28
  Speaker 1: want a new comer, I need your twenty four years man.
• 25:31
  Speaker 1: The longer the sob by the short of the chat.
• 25:36
  Speaker 2: I know is a three minutes you get one.
• 25:38
  Speaker 3: It's a meeting you guys put together. So there's no cap.
• 25:41
  Speaker 2: Like literally, oh that would be my help.
• 25:43
  Speaker 3: No, it's like this.
• 25:44
  Speaker 1: Should be an they should be an egg, like suarian.
• 25:49
  Speaker 3: What is a normal meeting.
• 25:50
  Speaker 2: That's a normal meeting talking.
• 25:52
  Speaker 3: The timer will go off and so I'm like, all right,
• 25:54
  Speaker 3: next share, it's like, oh, I feel so bad, like
• 25:57
  Speaker 3: you're getting cut off.
• 25:58
  Speaker 2: Like they'll hear it and they'll go and I'll just
• 25:59
  Speaker 2: end with this thank you.
• 26:02
  Speaker 3: It's a lot. So do you consider yourself sober?
• 26:07
  Speaker 1: Well? I am in marijuana, okay, I like edibles.
• 26:11
  Speaker 3: Okay, you're an edible.
• 26:13
  Speaker 1: I call myself high and dry. A lot of people
• 26:15
  Speaker 1: called California sayer high.
• 26:16
  Speaker 3: And dry, so much better, like high and dry, way
• 26:18
  Speaker 3: better because that's actually representation of what it is.
• 26:22
  Speaker 1: And a lot of people have told me that I've
• 26:24
  Speaker 1: left them that as well, so.
• 26:25
  Speaker 3: You know it's not no, but that should be the
• 26:28
  Speaker 3: new name of it, because saying California is sober sober,
• 26:31
  Speaker 3: you're not sober sober means that you don't participate in
• 26:34
  Speaker 3: any substance that's going to take you out of your reality.
• 26:37
  Speaker 3: So high and dry is ingenius and r.
• 26:41
  Speaker 2: Are you edible during the day kind of guy or
• 26:43
  Speaker 2: just a nighttime?
• 26:45
  Speaker 1: I'm an evening okay, okay with my family. I'm a
• 26:49
  Speaker 1: sort of evening to bed.
• 26:51
  Speaker 3: Okay.
• 26:51
  Speaker 1: But if you if you see me on any delta fly,
• 26:56
  Speaker 1: I'm off my tits. I'm high. I'm high before I
• 27:03
  Speaker 1: got on the plane you're flying. If I'm in an airplane,
• 27:08
  Speaker 1: I'm just watching the same episode of the Office over
• 27:11
  Speaker 1: and over again.
• 27:15
  Speaker 2: You took off before you took off.
• 27:17
  Speaker 3: Is this because you have a fear of flying or
• 27:19
  Speaker 3: you're like, I just can't deal.
• 27:20
  Speaker 1: No, I just fly all the time. I just try
• 27:22
  Speaker 1: to make it more enjoyable for myself and so so
• 27:25
  Speaker 1: I get high on flights. Although it depends what country
• 27:29
  Speaker 1: you're going to, you know, But I said the flights domestic, domestic,
• 27:35
  Speaker 1: and only out of l A, not the other way.
• 27:37
  Speaker 1: Don't even check.
• 27:42
  Speaker 3: Someone's talking to you.
• 27:43
  Speaker 1: I got to know my sering. You know, not how
• 27:46
  Speaker 1: to be hot flights.
• 27:48
  Speaker 2: I've checked four flights.
• 27:51
  Speaker 3: I've checked four flights. You cannot be high on any
• 27:54
  Speaker 3: of them.
• 27:55
  Speaker 1: I don't take any other drugs, no nothing else, no
• 27:58
  Speaker 1: no alcohol, no nothing in weeds. Just my thing.
• 28:00
  Speaker 3: Did you like drugs back in the day?
• 28:02
  Speaker 1: I did. I quit them before I quit alcohol, and
• 28:04
  Speaker 1: then I quit cigarettes after.
• 28:06
  Speaker 3: Do you vab.
• 28:07
  Speaker 1: I do not. I vaped after cigarettes, but I don't anything.
• 28:11
  Speaker 2: Now, Wow, how did you kick the VP?
• 28:15
  Speaker 1: I was in Europe and doing a tour and I
• 28:19
  Speaker 1: can't remember what country I was in. I want to
• 28:21
  Speaker 1: say Austria for some reason. But I was in Europe,
• 28:24
  Speaker 1: a different country each a couple of days, you know,
• 28:28
  Speaker 1: doing shows. And that was how I was still getting
• 28:30
  Speaker 1: nicotine because I hadn't smoked in the whole time. I
• 28:32
  Speaker 1: didn't want to go back to cigarettes. And then I moved.
• 28:34
  Speaker 1: I was in a country that had no nicotine vapes.
• 28:37
  Speaker 1: They only just had favored vapes, but they were the
• 28:40
  Speaker 1: same brand as the ones that I was buying across Europe. Okay,
• 28:43
  Speaker 1: so I bought like five vape free nicotine free ones
• 28:49
  Speaker 1: and I had one nicotine one in the mix and
• 28:51
  Speaker 1: I mixed them up and then I kept on doing this,
• 28:54
  Speaker 1: and then I thought, I have to be out of
• 28:57
  Speaker 1: nicotine now, right. Nicotine has to have left my system
• 29:00
  Speaker 1: because I've been doing this now for four weeks. I've
• 29:02
  Speaker 1: been smoking the nickedteine free vaps and so I was
• 29:05
  Speaker 1: just addicted to that then and then I ended. And
• 29:09
  Speaker 1: the biggest secret I will give to anyone whoever wants
• 29:11
  Speaker 1: to give up cigarettes or vaping or anything like that
• 29:14
  Speaker 1: is and this is from the Alan Carr book How
• 29:18
  Speaker 1: to Stop Smoking. This is quite a famous book. You
• 29:23
  Speaker 1: have to stop looking at other people smoking and vaping
• 29:26
  Speaker 1: with envy, right, okay, because that's what I did every time.
• 29:30
  Speaker 1: I used to quit for three months and then see
• 29:32
  Speaker 1: someone smoking and someone to go, I'm going up a
• 29:34
  Speaker 1: cigarette you want because there's always people. You can never
• 29:38
  Speaker 1: get a free cigarette of someone when you're a smoker,
• 29:40
  Speaker 1: when you've given up, everyone's like sure, because they want
• 29:43
  Speaker 1: to bring your dawn. They do. They want, whether it's
• 29:47
  Speaker 1: subconscious or whatever, they feel bad about themselves and smoking,
• 29:50
  Speaker 1: so they want more people into the pack. So they
• 29:53
  Speaker 1: try to drag you down. And so I always used
• 29:55
  Speaker 1: to see people and then eventually they go, why don't
• 29:57
  Speaker 1: you buy your own pack? After your above like five
• 29:59
  Speaker 1: of the things, right? And then and then you're back
• 30:02
  Speaker 1: in right right. So I used to look at people
• 30:06
  Speaker 1: who were smoking. I wish I could, And now I
• 30:09
  Speaker 1: look at them like they're slaves, Like they're still a
• 30:13
  Speaker 1: slave to nicotine. I pity people who smoke. If I
• 30:16
  Speaker 1: see someone standing outside like a Now, the funny thing
• 30:20
  Speaker 1: is I had to make a couple of cigarettes in school,
• 30:22
  Speaker 1: and I thought that my smoking kicked off when I
• 30:25
  Speaker 1: was living in England when they banned smoking indoors. Right now,
• 30:31
  Speaker 1: I was smoking a little bit, but okay, so then
• 30:34
  Speaker 1: you would have to move outside. Now I think that
• 30:37
  Speaker 1: it's always raining. They give you a little awning, right,
• 30:41
  Speaker 1: a little roped off.
• 30:42
  Speaker 2: Bit just for you to go out.
• 30:44
  Speaker 1: And pretty girls don't pay for cigarettes. Not they for
• 30:48
  Speaker 1: a lot of the time. Can I have a cigarette?
• 30:50
  Speaker 1: Of course? Can I have a light? Of course? Now
• 30:52
  Speaker 1: you're under a little awning with a girl. If I
• 30:56
  Speaker 1: go inside out of his ship, my personality can't coming
• 31:02
  Speaker 1: to play. They have there's an hilarious man in the
• 31:05
  Speaker 1: rain smoking.
• 31:08
  Speaker 3: Right, Yeah, it's like a movie love story.
• 31:11
  Speaker 1: I never would have had sex without smoking. No, No,
• 31:14
  Speaker 1: you wouldn't always remember. I'd hate to kiss someone you know,
• 31:17
  Speaker 1: would be looking out an ASTRAI I wouldn't kiss someone
• 31:19
  Speaker 1: who had a cigarette.
• 31:21
  Speaker 3: They did, They did because they asked me for a cigarette. No,
• 31:25
  Speaker 3: it's an epic conversation.
• 31:26
  Speaker 1: Starter epic conversations.
• 31:28
  Speaker 4: The hard thing with the babe is that you know whatever,
• 31:32
  Speaker 4: And I never want anybody to.
• 31:35
  Speaker 1: And so I could keep them on the vape. I
• 31:37
  Speaker 1: used to paint a cold store on that's brilliant.
• 31:41
  Speaker 3: I was like, really, what.
• 31:42
  Speaker 1: A great No one want to hit anything that I
• 31:46
  Speaker 1: only landed with my wife. You just stay.
• 31:49
  Speaker 2: I was like, wait, hold on, this is a really
• 31:51
  Speaker 2: good idea. Want anybody there.
• 31:54
  Speaker 3: When I moved to l A and I was a
• 31:56
  Speaker 3: heavy drinker as well, but I would buy swish or sweets,
• 32:00
  Speaker 3: not roll a spliff, smoke them the way they were,
• 32:04
  Speaker 3: and they don't have like right, but they are only
• 32:08
  Speaker 3: like most people.
• 32:08
  Speaker 4: It's a swish or sweet tobacco. They got grape flavor.
• 32:12
  Speaker 3: All of the people buy them, and then you like
• 32:14
  Speaker 3: backwoods pretty much cut it open and you roll a
• 32:17
  Speaker 3: blunt like a spliff, right, little tobacco, little weed. I
• 32:21
  Speaker 3: would just smoke them as they were and walk around
• 32:24
  Speaker 3: I'm sure with like tobacco stuck in my teeth. It
• 32:28
  Speaker 3: was not good.
• 32:30
  Speaker 1: A lot of people that rallies in Britain. I always
• 32:32
  Speaker 1: liked the people who did rallies because it felt like
• 32:34
  Speaker 1: their cigarette. And they always say, anyone who's doing this
• 32:38
  Speaker 1: anybody guys? Yeah, For some reason I take their advice
• 32:46
  Speaker 1: because I can't do what the problem with you is
• 32:51
  Speaker 1: you're just not giving yourself enough time to think. Maybe
• 32:55
  Speaker 1: I'm not. I don't know why. I think this person's
• 32:58
  Speaker 1: a siaged wise because you can roll a cigarette.
• 33:04
  Speaker 3: I would listen to Wis Kalifa any day of the
• 33:07
  Speaker 3: week his advice.
• 33:10
  Speaker 2: Yes, I was taking because he was always giving it
• 33:12
  Speaker 2: to me.
• 33:12
  Speaker 3: Doing that, Yeah, totally. And there's something about like, I'm
• 33:17
  Speaker 3: sure you have mad wisdom when you're on your edibles
• 33:20
  Speaker 3: on a delta flight, like you've solved all the world's
• 33:23
  Speaker 3: all right.
• 33:24
  Speaker 1: See this is this is the plight of the good
• 33:28
  Speaker 1: looking female. Right, Okay, okay, you think other people are
• 33:31
  Speaker 1: talking on planes. No, No, the rest of us are
• 33:35
  Speaker 1: just sitting down. When you get on a plane, the
• 33:38
  Speaker 1: person next to you asked how you die?
• 33:41
  Speaker 2: Is, oh, my flight's ruined.
• 33:42
  Speaker 1: No one's ever asked me anything. I've never do you
• 33:45
  Speaker 1: when you.
• 33:46
  Speaker 2: Plan, no, I don't talk to anybody.
• 33:47
  Speaker 4: And when that person is like god, if this is
• 33:50
  Speaker 4: the flight, I will put air pods in and not
• 33:53
  Speaker 4: play music.
• 33:54
  Speaker 2: Just because I'm like hopefully they think.
• 33:56
  Speaker 1: No one's trying to talk to you.
• 33:59
  Speaker 4: But when i'm I become a talker and the women
• 34:04
  Speaker 4: love to chat on a part.
• 34:07
  Speaker 1: Talk to you s No, I'm talking about functional members
• 34:10
  Speaker 1: of society. No one talks important people who we don't
• 34:13
  Speaker 1: have to get rid.
• 34:13
  Speaker 3: Of the amount of friends my sixty four year old
• 34:17
  Speaker 3: mother has met on a plane. I met the nicest
• 34:20
  Speaker 3: man on the plane. I'm like, who who the talk?
• 34:24
  Speaker 4: A plane is the quiet game until we touch down.
• 34:28
  Speaker 2: No one say a fucking word.
• 34:29
  Speaker 3: I'm pissed off because now I have my virgo starts
• 34:32
  Speaker 3: going insane of I've got to remove the overhead.
• 34:36
  Speaker 1: Is that stat sign or like you mean, like vertigo virgo?
• 34:42
  Speaker 3: What's your star sign?
• 34:44
  Speaker 1: Uh? Aquarius?
• 34:47
  Speaker 3: My day. We don't believe in God, so why would
• 34:49
  Speaker 3: you believe in the stars that he created?
• 34:54
  Speaker 1: I believe in the God from the other solid system
• 34:58
  Speaker 1: that created it, not what Hey, I don't I don't
• 35:00
  Speaker 1: believe there's I don't believe that there's there's trillions of stars.
• 35:04
  Speaker 1: There's more stars than in a beach of sand, is
• 35:08
  Speaker 1: grains of sand or whatever. There's more. There's more solar
• 35:11
  Speaker 1: systems than that, and that God created all of those
• 35:14
  Speaker 1: and he found the time to as a tourist visitors
• 35:17
  Speaker 1: two thousand years ago. Is he just doing a lap
• 35:20
  Speaker 1: around the universe? Was the next one I'm off to Mars.
• 35:24
  Speaker 1: Is it the same bloke, or is Jesus going everywhere?
• 35:27
  Speaker 1: I know he visited Utah?
• 35:30
  Speaker 3: Or if I were a Mormon, I guess I would
• 35:32
  Speaker 3: tell you to put your questions on the shelf and.
• 35:35
  Speaker 1: I'd get back to stripping, come back to trail, get
• 35:39
  Speaker 1: back to go back to more men, and get on it.
• 35:43
  Speaker 3: Were you raised religious?
• 35:45
  Speaker 1: My mother what said she was religious, but we didn't
• 35:49
  Speaker 1: go to church. My father's an atheist, but I never
• 35:52
  Speaker 1: really asked my dad about it until until ten years ago.
• 35:56
  Speaker 1: I never thought to ask him because he never talked
• 35:58
  Speaker 1: about it. My grandfather was religious. My mother liked to
• 36:02
  Speaker 1: have a guys of We watched a lot of Cecil
• 36:05
  Speaker 1: b de Mill movies.
• 36:06
  Speaker 3: What is that?
• 36:07
  Speaker 1: They're the old Biblical the Ten Commandments with ben hur
• 36:14
  Speaker 1: the Ten Commandments with the Charlton Heston type of things.
• 36:18
  Speaker 1: Those type of movies. We used to rock out. So
• 36:20
  Speaker 1: that was my religious upbringing, was watching it. And I
• 36:23
  Speaker 1: used to watch those those plaster scene Christmas movies like
• 36:26
  Speaker 1: the Drama Boy. Oh yeah, I knew what was going
• 36:29
  Speaker 1: on there. I've seen the Life of Brian. I know
• 36:32
  Speaker 1: all about the life of You've never seen the Life
• 36:33
  Speaker 1: of Brian.
• 36:34
  Speaker 3: No but Brian the Dog on Family Guys Etheists.
• 36:38
  Speaker 1: Okay, I'm gonna I'm going to get the Life of
• 36:42
  Speaker 1: Brian is. Whenever in the UK they did the top
• 36:45
  Speaker 1: one hundred comedies of all time, it always comes number one.
• 36:48
  Speaker 1: It's Monty Python's finest work. Okay, and it is work.
• 36:52
  Speaker 1: It is worth sitting down and watching.
• 36:54
  Speaker 3: All right, done.
• 36:55
  Speaker 1: I think it's on Netflix. I think, like last time
• 36:57
  Speaker 1: I watched it on Netflix, but it would be very
• 36:59
  Speaker 1: easy to fine. It's a hugely famoused. Now my wife's
• 37:03
  Speaker 1: noting on because I just made her and my twelve
• 37:05
  Speaker 1: year old watch it, okay, and they both liked it
• 37:08
  Speaker 1: so good. Yes, So I put off watching it my
• 37:13
  Speaker 1: whole like childhood in England because I've had no interest,
• 37:17
  Speaker 1: and you made me watch it like a year or
• 37:19
  Speaker 1: two ago.
• 37:20
  Speaker 3: Incredible, Okay, Okay, we have to watch what I'm watching tonight.
• 37:24
  Speaker 1: It's the basic story is it's a bloke whose life
• 37:28
  Speaker 1: runs parallel to Jesus right in the same era at
• 37:32
  Speaker 1: the same time, and we could have all worshiped him whatever. Yeah,
• 37:36
  Speaker 1: but it's it's it's you know, Eric God or John Clees,
• 37:39
  Speaker 1: not Pale.
• 37:40
  Speaker 2: It's it's it's it's great done.
• 37:42
  Speaker 3: I'm watching it tonight.
• 37:43
  Speaker 1: Yeah, okay, tell me this.
• 37:45
  Speaker 3: You're older.
• 37:45
  Speaker 1: You're meant to be watching the Snake tonight though, so you.
• 37:50
  Speaker 2: Must not know us.
• 37:52
  Speaker 3: It goes to bed at five. You've got all the
• 37:55
  Speaker 3: hours in the world to revenge.
• 37:57
  Speaker 1: Hold your child. Child.
• 37:59
  Speaker 3: I have a four year old dughter named Ocean and
• 38:01
  Speaker 3: an almost ten month old named Sosa. I say, goes
• 38:05
  Speaker 3: to bed at five, So goes to bed at five?
• 38:07
  Speaker 1: When is ice gotta be?
• 38:08
  Speaker 3: Ocean rocks it like a champ.
• 38:11
  Speaker 1: Yeah, you going to get late. These idiots who are like, oh,
• 38:14
  Speaker 1: it's all right for you. My child wakes me up
• 38:17
  Speaker 1: at six am every morning those decades. You're here's you
• 38:21
  Speaker 1: put him to bed at fucking seven? What did you
• 38:24
  Speaker 1: think was going to happen?
• 38:25
  Speaker 2: Yeah, nine o'clock.
• 38:26
  Speaker 1: What did you think You think it was gonna sleep
• 38:28
  Speaker 1: for fourteen fucking hours? You get eleven hours out of
• 38:31
  Speaker 1: the bastard. That's it.
• 38:33
  Speaker 3: I hear this. Let me tell you. On school nights,
• 38:36
  Speaker 3: we have a routine. When it's not school, I'm teaching her.
• 38:40
  Speaker 3: You don't have school, you can watch a show, you
• 38:42
  Speaker 3: can play in your playroom, and I just let her
• 38:45
  Speaker 3: kind of be the one that's like, I feel tired.
• 38:47
  Speaker 3: I want to go to bed now. A lot of
• 38:48
  Speaker 3: people are gonna be like, you need routine.
• 38:50
  Speaker 1: We do.
• 38:51
  Speaker 3: We got routine. But when you have an infant who
• 38:55
  Speaker 3: goes to bed at five and sleeps until she rocks
• 38:58
  Speaker 3: it until seven am, it gives me a lot of
• 39:01
  Speaker 3: time to watch all the shows that you recommend. Yeah,
• 39:05
  Speaker 3: so I will be watching The Snake, I will be
• 39:07
  Speaker 3: watching Life of Brian.
• 39:08
  Speaker 1: You have a great night ahead of you. I'm jealous.
• 39:11
  Speaker 1: That's a good night. That's great Episode three of The
• 39:14
  Speaker 1: Snake in the Life of Brian Winner.
• 39:17
  Speaker 3: You know, do you give you? I was wondering, do
• 39:19
  Speaker 3: you hearst mates.
• 39:20
  Speaker 1: And really have a good talk.
• 39:22
  Speaker 3: I was just thinking for dinners is all, you know,
• 39:26
  Speaker 3: that's all we do. Do you cook?
• 39:28
  Speaker 1: I do cook, but a limited amount of things. But
• 39:31
  Speaker 1: the things I do cook are good.
• 39:33
  Speaker 3: Okay, well that's good.
• 39:34
  Speaker 2: I'd rather have you're like my mother. She doesn't cook
• 39:38
  Speaker 2: a lot, but like what she cooks is oh.
• 39:40
  Speaker 1: Yeah, I make hamburgers on the barbecue very good. And
• 39:44
  Speaker 1: you know, I don't buy frozen patties or anything. I
• 39:46
  Speaker 1: make the patties and go all the things. I make
• 39:48
  Speaker 1: really good meat balls, Okay, say my spaghetti. Your meat
• 39:51
  Speaker 1: balls are pretty good.
• 39:53
  Speaker 3: Love it?
• 39:54
  Speaker 1: And that's everything.
• 39:56
  Speaker 3: Hey, that's all you need.
• 39:57
  Speaker 1: I can cook others when I did by myself. I
• 39:59
  Speaker 1: used to cook all, but the wife takes over the cooking.
• 40:03
  Speaker 3: Wow, I'm impressed.
• 40:04
  Speaker 1: Is she watching who? She's very good cook? I didn't know.
• 40:08
  Speaker 1: I was waiting to see she's turned that way.
• 40:10
  Speaker 3: No, she's here. Impressed.
• 40:14
  Speaker 1: My stand up comedy has gotten to I am like
• 40:17
  Speaker 1: a nineteen fifties cabaret actors like, Ah, my wife don't
• 40:23
  Speaker 1: even mention my mother in law? My mother and is
• 40:26
  Speaker 1: a very nice lady. She's actually staying with us, right.
• 40:28
  Speaker 2: How funny is the best of full house.
• 40:31
  Speaker 1: She's a big fan of yours. She was over excited.
• 40:35
  Speaker 3: Oh you should have brought her.
• 40:36
  Speaker 1: I would have been. She's taking care of the kids.
• 40:39
  Speaker 1: A letter, y Why didn't you let her so much?
• 40:44
  Speaker 3: My mom? We love her? I love her mom. I
• 40:48
  Speaker 3: packed my mom on like a like. Literally, I am
• 40:51
  Speaker 3: Paris Hilton. My mother is tinker Bell. That's how we roll. No,
• 40:55
  Speaker 3: I love herm mom. I want to know about the snake.
• 40:57
  Speaker 3: Do they have an earwig in they did they did.
• 40:59
  Speaker 1: Yeah, sometimes I'd walk out for the game. That's there's
• 41:02
  Speaker 1: no teleprompts in the Argentinian jungle, right, Yeah, so you
• 41:07
  Speaker 1: walk out that you're standing in a field, there's all
• 41:09
  Speaker 1: these crates around you. Welcome to the snake. This is
• 41:11
  Speaker 1: the And then like you know, to begin with as well,
• 41:14
  Speaker 1: when you turn to someone you have to go so
• 41:17
  Speaker 1: and then you hear Derek Derek like as you get it,
• 41:22
  Speaker 1: as you go along, you get to know him a
• 41:23
  Speaker 1: lot better and all that type of stuff. Right, But
• 41:25
  Speaker 1: also for there's certain things like in saving ceremonies, there's
• 41:31
  Speaker 1: there's something that comes up now where I ask a
• 41:33
  Speaker 1: question to someone, just something basic, like you seem alarmed
• 41:36
  Speaker 1: by the whole thing? Do you feel portrayed or something
• 41:39
  Speaker 1: like that. Well, I don't know. I haven't been in
• 41:42
  Speaker 1: the house. I haven't seen on the footage. I've just
• 41:44
  Speaker 1: showed up for the saving ceremony. So I'm I'm watching
• 41:47
  Speaker 1: the show back now right going, Oh my god, that's
• 41:51
  Speaker 1: why I am so angry with it. I love watching
• 41:53
  Speaker 1: the show. I'm obsessed and so so, yeah, I do
• 41:58
  Speaker 1: have an earwig that goes in there, and uh, Sally
• 42:01
  Speaker 1: Anne is the person talking to me. Sally Anne is
• 42:04
  Speaker 1: a reality TV got. She she created Jersey Shore. Oh
• 42:12
  Speaker 1: when she tells you something, she'll be listening to this
• 42:14
  Speaker 1: podcast as well.
• 42:15
  Speaker 3: Good. I hope she does. I feel like honored if
• 42:18
  Speaker 3: she listens to this. Yeah, give her a wave on YouTube.
• 42:21
  Speaker 3: That's Jersey Shore was like before you even realized how
• 42:27
  Speaker 3: like you didn't. You couldn't produce a scene because these
• 42:30
  Speaker 3: people were so authentically chaotic that you had to just
• 42:35
  Speaker 3: you had to put cameras in every room to catch
• 42:37
  Speaker 3: every it was. The casting was fantastic off the hook,
• 42:41
  Speaker 3: and you just like when they're out at these bars,
• 42:45
  Speaker 3: they were like feral cats. You can produce a fucking
• 42:48
  Speaker 3: scene like where I come from. It's like, hey, we're
• 42:52
  Speaker 3: gonna get you and Brittany to sit right here, and
• 42:55
  Speaker 3: they like roped it off. It's it's like a whole thing, right.
• 42:58
  Speaker 3: Jersey Shore is a chef's kiss. I pray to god
• 43:01
  Speaker 3: she listens to this episode. I would be so honored to.
• 43:05
  Speaker 1: She already texted me on the way over here to
• 43:08
  Speaker 1: ask me how went, and I said, I'm going to
• 43:09
  Speaker 1: do it right now.
• 43:10
  Speaker 3: And what are you going to tell her?
• 43:12
  Speaker 1: She'll watch it?
• 43:14
  Speaker 2: Do you how do you feel.
• 43:15
  Speaker 1: I'll tell her I said I wouldn't talk to her
• 43:16
  Speaker 1: on a plane.
• 43:20
  Speaker 3: I'm honored by the way. Where's your next stand up
• 43:23
  Speaker 3: going to be?
• 43:25
  Speaker 1: I'm flying to fuck This is how I find out
• 43:29
  Speaker 1: where I am in the world. Jim Jefferies dot com. Serious, Yeah,
• 43:34
  Speaker 1: I'm going someone else tops it up for me. If
• 43:36
  Speaker 1: you look at this, you'll know where you're going to be. Yeah,
• 43:40
  Speaker 1: I know, okay, because I'm going to do Hawaii in
• 43:42
  Speaker 1: the summer because I always find Hawaii. I was just
• 43:45
  Speaker 1: out of the blue find Hawaiian gigs to do in summer. Azing, so,
• 43:49
  Speaker 1: and then I am going to be in Maui at
• 43:52
  Speaker 1: the Castle Theater on July twenty fifth and July twenty sixth,
• 43:55
  Speaker 1: I will be in Honolulu, and then my next gig
• 44:00
  Speaker 1: that is Lisbon, Portugal, and I go all across Europe
• 44:03
  Speaker 1: for like two three months.
• 44:04
  Speaker 3: That is really incredible.
• 44:05
  Speaker 1: Yeah, it's it's it's before Netflix specials you. I was
• 44:12
  Speaker 1: one of the few international comics and when we say
• 44:14
  Speaker 1: international comics that I could play Australia, UK and America.
• 44:19
  Speaker 1: And that's because I put the time into all three
• 44:22
  Speaker 1: of those continents, okay, And I put the time, and
• 44:25
  Speaker 1: I kept on going back and doing gigs and doing
• 44:27
  Speaker 1: gigs and doing gigs. But if you had an HBO special,
• 44:29
  Speaker 1: it was still only watched in America, and then they
• 44:31
  Speaker 1: might sell it on to another country or whatever. You
• 44:33
  Speaker 1: have a Netflix special, bang especially so now I too.
• 44:38
  Speaker 1: I just did Japan. I've got you know, I've got gigs.
• 44:42
  Speaker 3: In I watch hacks. Yeah, I don't know if you
• 44:45
  Speaker 3: watch hack.
• 44:46
  Speaker 1: I don't like watching people acting stand up. I heard
• 44:49
  Speaker 1: it's very good.
• 44:50
  Speaker 3: It's very that would I understand why that would be hard.
• 44:53
  Speaker 3: But she goes to the Philippines or something. I'm blinking,
• 44:58
  Speaker 3: and she's delivering her stand up. But there's a and
• 45:02
  Speaker 3: I'm blinking on what that's called translator? A translator? How
• 45:08
  Speaker 3: what is that like? When you perform in a place
• 45:11
  Speaker 3: where you don't speak their language.
• 45:14
  Speaker 1: Well, because they've come to see you, they've seen you
• 45:17
  Speaker 1: on Netflix. These are the people who.
• 45:19
  Speaker 3: Do speak Okay, so you can't actually cut that out.
• 45:22
  Speaker 1: Well, I speak multiple languages.
• 45:26
  Speaker 3: Because he reads a lot of books. Subtitle I've got
• 45:30
  Speaker 3: a show.
• 45:31
  Speaker 1: I've got a charity gig coming. Tell me you think
• 45:33
  Speaker 1: this is funny because I've got a charity gig coming up.
• 45:35
  Speaker 1: Will Smith from the Dodgers has a charity thing where
• 45:38
  Speaker 1: he has stand up and I'm doing the gig, right,
• 45:41
  Speaker 1: so the Dodgers, yeah, we love it. So the Dodgers
• 45:45
  Speaker 1: are going to be there, right, And they said it
• 45:47
  Speaker 1: last year's show, Mookie Bets, Freddie Freeman, all these different people,
• 45:51
  Speaker 1: all that, and then I was like, you want to
• 45:54
  Speaker 1: meet show how your Tarny of course and Yamamoto. But
• 45:58
  Speaker 1: it turns out they're stuck up and I don't want
• 46:00
  Speaker 1: to go to English speaking comedy because they're full of
• 46:02
  Speaker 1: themselves right now because the course they don't speak English
• 46:05
  Speaker 1: good enough. So this I'm thinking of opening the show.
• 46:10
  Speaker 1: I'm going to ruin my opening now. In the week
• 46:13
  Speaker 1: coming up to the show, I'm going to learn a
• 46:16
  Speaker 1: joke in Japanese already SOLDI, and then I'm going to
• 46:21
  Speaker 1: get up and go hit it. I can't do that, right,
• 46:26
  Speaker 1: but that's that's the gist of Japanese. That was a
• 46:29
  Speaker 1: Japanese that my wife's shaking her head, very racist because
• 46:32
  Speaker 1: she enjoyed it anyway, So I'll go do it. And
• 46:36
  Speaker 1: then I go, that was a waste of a fucking time.
• 46:38
  Speaker 1: I didn't show up fucking where's Yamamoto when your fucking needing?
• 46:45
  Speaker 1: Because many many years ago, many years ago, I had
• 46:48
  Speaker 1: a corporate I did a Christmas function. I was living
• 46:50
  Speaker 1: in Manchester, England this twenty years ago and I did
• 46:55
  Speaker 1: a corporate function for Manchester United at that stage, the largest,
• 46:59
  Speaker 1: the most pop of the sports team in the world, Manchester.
• 47:02
  Speaker 1: You know this has had Wayne Rooney, is the strike
• 47:04
  Speaker 1: of Rude van Nistelroy and all like real classic players.
• 47:09
  Speaker 1: And I got up and I was like, I finished
• 47:12
  Speaker 1: the gig. And my dad is never that excited by
• 47:14
  Speaker 1: different gigs do He's been seeing me do this since
• 47:16
  Speaker 1: I was seventeen. And I said, Dad, I'm going to
• 47:18
  Speaker 1: play Manchester United. My father's a big football fan and
• 47:21
  Speaker 1: my dad's never run. It brings me up all the
• 47:22
  Speaker 1: time now because my mother's dead, right But like before
• 47:25
  Speaker 1: my mother died, he never rang me up. The phone
• 47:28
  Speaker 1: would get pasted to him. I'd speak to For the
• 47:30
  Speaker 1: last ten years of my mother's life, I didn't know
• 47:32
  Speaker 1: my dad could talk. Every time, every time my father
• 47:36
  Speaker 1: went to talk, my mother would go, shut up, Gary,
• 47:38
  Speaker 1: you're an idiot. I used to defend him and go
• 47:41
  Speaker 1: let him talk. What do you talk to him like that.
• 47:43
  Speaker 1: Why would you get into him? Anyway? My mom was
• 47:45
  Speaker 1: dead for about three days before me and my brother's
• 47:47
  Speaker 1: got together and went mum was doing some good work
• 47:51
  Speaker 1: because my dad's opinions of what my son calls windows
• 47:55
  Speaker 1: up opinions anyway, So what was I talking about doing?
• 48:00
  Speaker 1: Manchester United? Him? Right? So I was doing Manchester United?
• 48:05
  Speaker 3: And I.
• 48:07
  Speaker 1: Went on stage and half the team just fucking was
• 48:12
  Speaker 1: ignoring me, just like like I had a few of
• 48:15
  Speaker 1: the lads laughing, and half the team. I couldn't get
• 48:18
  Speaker 1: anything out of him. And then I went and sat
• 48:21
  Speaker 1: out afterwards and they fed me a meal in like
• 48:24
  Speaker 1: the little alleyway thing like I wasn't to eat with
• 48:26
  Speaker 1: the rest of the people sitting like on a milk
• 48:29
  Speaker 1: crate a meal, and my dad wrings me up and
• 48:32
  Speaker 1: he goes, how was it? And I went it was
• 48:36
  Speaker 1: all right, I said. Rooney thought I was funny, and
• 48:39
  Speaker 1: Gigs thought I was all right. But Louis Vasa and
• 48:44
  Speaker 1: this door now, and then he goes, they don't speak English,
• 48:47
  Speaker 1: and I was like, oh, they're all friendship people and
• 48:52
  Speaker 1: all type of stuff. There was a language barrier they
• 48:54
  Speaker 1: weren't getting through.
• 48:56
  Speaker 2: Help a light of them. That's to sit there looking back.
• 49:00
  Speaker 1: Wow, it's all right. You don't speak fucking English, but
• 49:03
  Speaker 1: don't throw tomatoes. Don't be a cun about it right before.
• 49:07
  Speaker 3: I really, I don't think.
• 49:09
  Speaker 1: I can't say the sword on your podcast?
• 49:11
  Speaker 3: Can I see your next Tuesday word?
• 49:12
  Speaker 2: I love that word, We love that word.
• 49:14
  Speaker 1: Oh, but your audience might be.
• 49:18
  Speaker 3: Some days they wake I'm really excited, and some days
• 49:20
  Speaker 3: they wake up not that excited. But that's okay, that's life. No,
• 49:23
  Speaker 3: I'm fine with it.
• 49:25
  Speaker 1: I don't say it on the Snake.
• 49:29
  Speaker 2: That's why I was watching.
• 49:30
  Speaker 1: If you're watching this podcast and you find me annoying,
• 49:33
  Speaker 1: don't worry. I'm hardly in the show. You can enjoy
• 49:37
  Speaker 1: it without me. I'm just passing through the show. They
• 49:42
  Speaker 1: didn't even put me on the billboard. They put it
• 49:47
  Speaker 1: I got all your shows on a Times Square. Fucking brilliant.
• 49:51
  Speaker 1: There's a picture of a priest, and only just the
• 49:55
  Speaker 1: two of them that it was the priest, the only
• 49:57
  Speaker 1: fans of one of the cop and I think the
• 49:59
  Speaker 1: Vonte is.
• 50:00
  Speaker 3: Yeah. A lot of a lot of people to fit
• 50:02
  Speaker 3: onto one space.
• 50:03
  Speaker 1: Yeah, not all the contestants got on either.
• 50:05
  Speaker 2: When you could have just put Jim Jefferies.
• 50:07
  Speaker 1: Yeah, but I could. I should have just like they
• 50:09
  Speaker 1: should have been the center and then just be in
• 50:11
  Speaker 1: the corner.
• 50:12
  Speaker 3: Yeah, holding a snake.
• 50:14
  Speaker 1: Oh, this is the thing. I kept on asking to
• 50:15
  Speaker 1: hold a snake. I got all Steve Irwin on this bitch, right.
• 50:18
  Speaker 1: I showed up. I showed up to the show like
• 50:20
  Speaker 1: this game, give me a snake. I wanted to open
• 50:22
  Speaker 1: like I wanted to be.
• 50:24
  Speaker 3: They should have given you like a Britney Spears moment.
• 50:26
  Speaker 1: I wanted to be welcome to the snake and holding
• 50:28
  Speaker 1: up a snake and then and then they were like, oh,
• 50:31
  Speaker 1: but then people will know that the snakes aren't scary
• 50:34
  Speaker 1: and that because there's the snake tasks where they have
• 50:36
  Speaker 1: to touch him and stuff and where I.
• 50:38
  Speaker 3: Thought I stays are terrifying. And I mean it doesn't
• 50:41
  Speaker 3: even matter if because at the end of the day,
• 50:44
  Speaker 3: you know who has the medallion. Besides, when it's being
• 50:46
  Speaker 3: swapped in the boxes, right then you want to be
• 50:49
  Speaker 3: like you want to be on your game. You would
• 50:51
  Speaker 3: know immediately if I touched a snake.
• 50:52
  Speaker 1: Well, that's why the first episode isn't as fun as
• 50:55
  Speaker 1: the other ones, because they're not doing anything great, they're
• 50:56
  Speaker 1: just touching snakes, but they're sort of just feeling each
• 50:58
  Speaker 1: other out and they wanted to separate the group pops.
• 51:00
  Speaker 3: And I kind of loved that part. Yeah, the beginning
• 51:03
  Speaker 3: of a show, like the setup. It just it's like
• 51:06
  Speaker 3: the first drink where you start feeling a little warm.
• 51:08
  Speaker 1: Well, the next few episodes, this new one, they start
• 51:12
  Speaker 1: yelling at each other. They're like, I.
• 51:15
  Speaker 3: Got the competition aspect, we need the reality team.
• 51:18
  Speaker 1: Yeah no, no, no, that's that's kicking in. But I
• 51:21
  Speaker 1: believe I don't approve of this, but I think I'm
• 51:24
  Speaker 1: the first Australian game show, a reality show hosting in America, right,
• 51:29
  Speaker 1: And I think it's only because of they like the
• 51:32
  Speaker 1: accent with the word welcome to the snake.
• 51:35
  Speaker 3: The snake for the moment you walked in, I said, crikey,
• 51:40
  Speaker 3: I tell.
• 51:40
  Speaker 1: You what I say. My wife can attest to this.
• 51:43
  Speaker 1: I say crikey. In the wild about four times a year.
• 51:47
  Speaker 1: It involves me stubbing a toe or seeing like a
• 51:51
  Speaker 1: really big frog or something.
• 51:54
  Speaker 5: Big frogs when he travels very rarely, very really well,
• 52:00
  Speaker 5: I'm stubbing my toe once maybe once a year, I
• 52:02
  Speaker 5: see a massive frog that olds me going kroaky?
• 52:06
  Speaker 3: What does mean?
• 52:07
  Speaker 1: Crikey just means fuck me, like fuck me because fuck me.
• 52:12
  Speaker 1: It's the overtone of like can your bloody believe it? Can?
• 52:16
  Speaker 3: I say it? Way more than when you.
• 52:17
  Speaker 1: See something that's too big or like bigger than you
• 52:20
  Speaker 1: think or something like that, you go krikey.
• 52:24
  Speaker 3: Oh I love it even more.
• 52:25
  Speaker 1: Now.
• 52:25
  Speaker 3: I have a friend who's married to an Australian man,
• 52:28
  Speaker 3: and every time he calls, I.
• 52:30
  Speaker 1: Think, is this is he from vand Pump is change? Yes, yes, yeah,
• 52:34
  Speaker 1: he knows me. One time I was at Lisa's house
• 52:36
  Speaker 1: and they rang up and he wanted to chat to
• 52:38
  Speaker 1: me for and then I when him at the dog charity.
• 52:41
  Speaker 1: What's his name again, Frocky brock brook Yeah, Brooks are right,
• 52:47
  Speaker 1: he's a good guy.
• 52:49
  Speaker 3: Wait, I want you to tell me because that's our Like.
• 52:51
  Speaker 1: I got trouble at this. I got trouble at Lisa
• 52:53
  Speaker 1: Vander Pump's dog Charity because the Mike Tyson Jake Paul
• 52:57
  Speaker 1: fight was on and they were all talking about rescuing dogs.
• 52:59
  Speaker 6: Were that every everyone was on their someone was like,
• 53:05
  Speaker 6: like I was just gigging in Canada for Game seven
• 53:11
  Speaker 6: of the Stanley Cup and Edmondson's playing and it was
• 53:14
  Speaker 6: very and there was people like all in Edmonton Jerseys,
• 53:17
  Speaker 6: like you know Canadians, like it's very hard to tell
• 53:19
  Speaker 6: people to go, hey, don't get on your phone.
• 53:21
  Speaker 1: And and so I just lied and said different scores
• 53:25
  Speaker 1: that didn't matter to upset them. Oh you're down five
• 53:27
  Speaker 1: runs me now what the fuck? Anyway? So yeah, so
• 53:32
  Speaker 1: we know Lisa's Lisa is my girl. Man. I love
• 53:36
  Speaker 1: Lisa connection so wide and Lisa have. We get a
• 53:40
  Speaker 1: kick out of each other. We do. We like each other.
• 53:43
  Speaker 1: We we I did a podcast and then I did
• 53:47
  Speaker 1: a TV show with the British got James James with
• 53:51
  Speaker 1: James and then and then after that she invited us
• 53:57
  Speaker 1: up to Villa Rosa and you look, you got to
• 53:59
  Speaker 1: see this one's and the and the ponies and sing
• 54:03
  Speaker 1: and then and then it was like come to my birthday.
• 54:06
  Speaker 1: But then we just organic. We became actual friends. We
• 54:10
  Speaker 1: call each other up and have chats and stuff.
• 54:12
  Speaker 3: That so happy.
• 54:14
  Speaker 2: She wouldn't as a friendship for sure.
• 54:16
  Speaker 1: She's a nice lady. Man, She's a nice lady. And
• 54:19
  Speaker 1: she commands every space he's in and I admire I
• 54:25
  Speaker 1: like this whole idea of one time she just like
• 54:28
  Speaker 1: she was. She she was just what I try to
• 54:32
  Speaker 1: think of. One time she was getting like her wardrobe
• 54:35
  Speaker 1: redone right, and she said, and it was just me
• 54:37
  Speaker 1: over at the house and she goes, come up, I
• 54:39
  Speaker 1: want to show I want to show you the warro
• 54:40
  Speaker 1: Come up, Come on, And I was like this and
• 54:42
  Speaker 1: she goes move ken over to that room and there's
• 54:46
  Speaker 1: pink things like this, and it was so lost in me.
• 54:49
  Speaker 1: But I remember standing in her wardrobe going, how many
• 54:52
  Speaker 1: women on Earth would swap places with me right now
• 54:56
  Speaker 1: to be in Lisa vander pubs A lot.
• 54:58
  Speaker 3: Of people a lot, because you've seen that space on television,
• 55:04
  Speaker 3: like when people would watch Real Housewives of Beverly Hills.
• 55:07
  Speaker 3: The first time that I walked into it, I was
• 55:09
  Speaker 3: like this, you don't believe in heaven, but if it
• 55:14
  Speaker 3: does exist, I think it would be Lisa vander Pump's
• 55:17
  Speaker 3: bedroom and closet.
• 55:18
  Speaker 1: Yeah yeah, you think you think you would just be
• 55:20
  Speaker 1: floating around with handbags all arounda.
• 55:22
  Speaker 3: Oh, all the burkins all like her shirts that these
• 55:25
  Speaker 3: like simple button ups that all have her name, and
• 55:28
  Speaker 3: everything's perfectly pressed. And she SIPs tea on white carpet
• 55:32
  Speaker 3: and there's not a stain on it. It's all just
• 55:34
  Speaker 3: fucking and.
• 55:35
  Speaker 1: She she puts the flowers in his And she's wonderful
• 55:38
  Speaker 1: with children, yep, because her grandson is the same age
• 55:42
  Speaker 1: as our son, a three year old, and so we've
• 55:45
  Speaker 1: been to these parties and stuff and she's just a
• 55:47
  Speaker 1: delight around kids. And it's it's like if you she
• 55:53
  Speaker 1: cooks for you and then she cleans up and then
• 55:55
  Speaker 1: she does it, and it's just like, is there anything
• 55:57
  Speaker 1: she doesn't No, she.
• 55:58
  Speaker 3: Has zero help. By the way, she doesn't have any assistant.
• 56:00
  Speaker 3: She does all of her on floral arrangements, cooks, does
• 56:03
  Speaker 3: the whole bit. Just a massive empire.
• 56:06
  Speaker 1: You know. Okay, So this with men, there is a
• 56:11
  Speaker 1: certain element of men will look up to older men
• 56:16
  Speaker 1: will go like, I'd love to beat Clint Eastwood. He's
• 56:19
  Speaker 1: a bad arts dude or whatever, or some old athlete
• 56:22
  Speaker 1: that you think, oh, I like that. But now now,
• 56:25
  Speaker 1: for I might be wrong, But for women not so much.
• 56:29
  Speaker 1: When they meet an older woman, they might admire the
• 56:31
  Speaker 1: old woman, they might think she's great, but no young
• 56:35
  Speaker 1: girl wants to be Meryl Streep or maybe if they're
• 56:39
  Speaker 1: an actress or something like that, Okay, Lisa vander Pump
• 56:42
  Speaker 1: is the only more mature person I've ever met. Where
• 56:44
  Speaker 1: young girls when they know that I know her, lose
• 56:47
  Speaker 1: their shit and they want like girls in their early
• 56:51
  Speaker 1: twenties are like, oh my god, you know she is
• 56:54
  Speaker 1: the queen. I want to be maybe another women in
• 56:57
  Speaker 1: their sixties that women lose their mind.
• 57:00
  Speaker 3: I can't think of any Every time we would film
• 57:02
  Speaker 3: and Lisa would walk into the building, it was like
• 57:06
  Speaker 3: the Beatles just walked out exactly. It was insanity.
• 57:09
  Speaker 1: I've dined with her in Pump okay, right, and then
• 57:15
  Speaker 1: she Tom Thom had just opened up like this, and
• 57:18
  Speaker 1: she was like she went to me and she goes,
• 57:20
  Speaker 1: she goes, she goes, oh, I have to show you Tom.
• 57:23
  Speaker 1: We have to look good, Tom. And she picks up
• 57:26
  Speaker 1: Jiggy and she and then she had diamonds hanging down
• 57:29
  Speaker 1: here in the cleavage out and you have to walk
• 57:32
  Speaker 1: like two doors up to get the pump. And we
• 57:35
  Speaker 1: walked and there was like I think there's like a
• 57:36
  Speaker 1: gay night. It was like a fish drink.
• 57:40
  Speaker 2: They're dancing and stuff on poles.
• 57:42
  Speaker 1: And fish taking gay guys that all rushed up to
• 57:44
  Speaker 1: the window and she walked by and she just strutted
• 57:50
  Speaker 1: down and they were, Oh my god, she's there.
• 57:53
  Speaker 3: She's there like this, people go crazy for her. She's
• 57:57
  Speaker 3: she's an icon in so many ways, whether it's you're
• 57:59
  Speaker 3: an entrepreneur, she's a gay icon. Women who are my
• 58:03
  Speaker 3: age and younger are like, oh my god, I want
• 58:05
  Speaker 3: to achieve what this woman has.
• 58:07
  Speaker 1: You want to know what she issue. Was an influencer
• 58:09
  Speaker 1: before they were influencer. Yeah, totally before the Internet everything.
• 58:13
  Speaker 1: And Ralph l Looren was a similar type of dude, right,
• 58:15
  Speaker 1: he was like a guy who just hanged out in
• 58:17
  Speaker 1: the Hamptons, look really good in clothes, and anyone like,
• 58:19
  Speaker 1: there's this style of this guy that keeps showing it.
• 58:22
  Speaker 1: You go to Lisa. The food's great, right, but you
• 58:25
  Speaker 1: go there to be Lisa. Yeah, she decorates herself. Oh yeah,
• 58:30
  Speaker 1: I think so.
• 58:32
  Speaker 3: You're stepping into her other home.
• 58:33
  Speaker 1: You're stepping into her world. That is the secret sauce.
• 58:37
  Speaker 1: The secret source.
• 58:38
  Speaker 3: Is her every detail.
• 58:40
  Speaker 1: You know, if you if you like, you know, her
• 58:42
  Speaker 1: fingerprints are all over it. Yeah. Yeah, she's wonderful person.
• 58:46
  Speaker 3: Well, actually it makes me feel like it's wild that
• 58:51
  Speaker 3: like I could pick up the phone and call this
• 58:52
  Speaker 3: woman you just.
• 58:54
  Speaker 1: Let's do it, miss call is it Lisa?
• 58:57
  Speaker 2: Yeah?
• 58:58
  Speaker 1: From twelve to fifty two.
• 59:00
  Speaker 3: Shut the front door. That's wild. It was meant to be.
• 59:04
  Speaker 2: It was meant to be.
• 59:06
  Speaker 1: We'll see, we'll see, we'll see. She's probably arranging flowers
• 59:10
  Speaker 1: as we speak. We'll leave, We'll leave it on because
• 59:13
  Speaker 1: she will, she will.
• 59:14
  Speaker 3: Call back, she will call back. Oh my god, I'm
• 59:16
  Speaker 3: so excited about this. Okay, I'm keeping you on for
• 59:20
  Speaker 3: the bonus and I'm so excited for the bonus. But
• 59:22
  Speaker 3: before we do that, where can people watch the Snake?
• 59:26
  Speaker 1: The Snake is on Fox, but catch it on Hulu
• 59:30
  Speaker 1: as well.
• 59:30
  Speaker 3: Yeah, I stream it on Hulu.
• 59:32
  Speaker 1: Stream it on And to the people who haven't said
• 59:35
  Speaker 1: you can't see the first two, we probably can on
• 59:37
  Speaker 1: demand or whatever. But just go to Hulu now and
• 59:38
  Speaker 1: bings the first two yep, and then you'll be up
• 59:41
  Speaker 1: to date for episode three.
• 59:43
  Speaker 3: And it airs on what nights Tuesdays, Tuesdays, Love Tuesday.
• 59:47
  Speaker 1: Tuesday Leading shows the one Percent Club straight into the
• 59:50
  Speaker 1: Snake and you'll be like, welcome to the Snake. And
• 59:54
  Speaker 1: then I'll go like this Kraakey and I wear khakis
• 59:56
  Speaker 1: the whole time, and I just come out of the
• 59:58
  Speaker 1: bushes like this. There's a lot of snake as in there.
• 1:00:04
  Speaker 3: I can tell that your wife has a really fun time.
• 1:00:08
  Speaker 1: She laughs at me. We make each other.
• 1:00:11
  Speaker 3: She and you get to admire how stunning she is.
• 1:00:14
  Speaker 1: Well, she's also very funny.
• 1:00:16
  Speaker 3: I can tell her.
• 1:00:17
  Speaker 1: She's she's got like my my sister in law, her sister.
• 1:00:23
  Speaker 1: That's how it works. So your sister in law, My
• 1:00:25
  Speaker 1: sister in law is a comedy right just coincidentally is
• 1:00:28
  Speaker 1: a comedy writer for the BBC right sitcoms and stuff
• 1:00:31
  Speaker 1: like that. So her family comes from a very comedy
• 1:00:33
  Speaker 1: based type of quick witting. Her parents funny people.
• 1:00:38
  Speaker 3: I love that. I'm so happy that you came, by
• 1:00:41
  Speaker 3: the way, Tasy, Yes, so happy. All right, we're gonna
• 1:00:45
  Speaker 3: jump in.
• 1:00:45
  Speaker 1: We'll be able to back out for lunch afterwards, and
• 1:00:48
  Speaker 1: then we'll just go home to your mom and go
• 1:00:50
  Speaker 1: out fucking La La cantor.
• 1:00:57
  Speaker 3: Can I say that that My bio drag name is
• 1:00:59
  Speaker 3: La is Like, Yeah, isn't fabulous?
• 1:01:03
  Speaker 1: When I wear glasses, I call myself Kent. I don't
• 1:01:06
  Speaker 1: know if it works.
• 1:01:08
  Speaker 3: It depends on it. Yeah, Cunt.
• 1:01:14
  Speaker 1: Doug was was late after all those years, But he
• 1:01:19
  Speaker 1: took him off and then went, ah, she dated the bloke,
• 1:01:22
  Speaker 1: met the two blokes, never even just went you look
• 1:01:26
  Speaker 1: like the same dude, just a slightly better posture. That
• 1:01:31
  Speaker 1: was all that Superman did. He was like a hunchback
• 1:01:33
  Speaker 1: and then just went feeling good.
• 1:01:37
  Speaker 3: I can't believe Jim Jefferies, thank you for being on that.
• 1:01:42
  Speaker 1: I've had a wonderful time. Anytime you want me back.
• 1:01:46
  Speaker 1: I know this is mostly reality TV, but maybe you
• 1:01:49
  Speaker 1: know the second season of The Snake, we come back here,
• 1:01:52
  Speaker 1: we do it all again season finale The Snake, if
• 1:01:54
  Speaker 1: you I'll come back.
• 1:01:55
  Speaker 3: I love it, and we mentioned it all here, not
• 1:01:57
  Speaker 3: just not just the reality TV. But you're in the
• 1:02:00
  Speaker 3: world now, I.
• 1:02:02
  Speaker 1: Mean I'm in the world. I'm also I'm I'm part
• 1:02:06
  Speaker 1: of Bachelor Nation. I do a few Bachelor podcasts. We
• 1:02:10
  Speaker 1: just did Nick by ours as well.
• 1:02:12
  Speaker 3: Really, my wife is a huge one. That's a huge
• 1:02:14
  Speaker 3: one because.
• 1:02:15
  Speaker 1: Well we know Nick, but we watched that. We started
• 1:02:18
  Speaker 1: watching The Bachelor ironically, me and the wife during COVID.
• 1:02:23
  Speaker 1: This is what these fucking idiots get up to. And
• 1:02:26
  Speaker 1: then unless it's on at the same time as The Snake,
• 1:02:28
  Speaker 1: then it's a piece of ship. Don't watch it. I
• 1:02:30
  Speaker 1: don't even know what channel. I'm going to shut up.
• 1:02:33
  Speaker 1: I'm meant to be here representing Fox for Fox's sake.
• 1:02:36
  Speaker 1: Out of all the game show hosts on American TV,
• 1:02:42
  Speaker 1: I do say you cut the most on podcasts. You've
• 1:02:45
  Speaker 1: got to give credit where credits due, because when you
• 1:02:48
  Speaker 1: think of what the guy from the Bachelor was canceled for, right, yeah,
• 1:02:51
  Speaker 1: you've got to get ahead of it, you do. You've
• 1:02:53
  Speaker 1: got to get ahead of the cancelation. What you've got
• 1:02:55
  Speaker 1: to do is you've got to say so much that
• 1:02:57
  Speaker 1: when they go to cancel you, you go.
• 1:02:59
  Speaker 3: For what what?
• 1:03:01
  Speaker 1: What? What?
• 1:03:01
  Speaker 3: Bit was it?
• 1:03:03
  Speaker 2: I've said a lot of it.
• 1:03:07
  Speaker 3: You are fucking hysterical. Thank you guys for listening to
• 1:03:11
  Speaker 3: another episode of the givena Lalla Podcast. Jim Jeffries is
• 1:03:14
  Speaker 3: sticking around for the bonus. You can catch down on Monday.
• 1:03:17
  Speaker 3: We will catch you guys again next week. Bye.
• 1:03:21
  Speaker 1: I'll tell you when I smell my best. When I'm
• 1:03:23
  Speaker 1: going through a duty free store, I always pick a
• 1:03:26
  Speaker 1: separate person that sitting next to me might enjoy this
• 1:03:30
  Speaker 1: or I hate it.
• 1:03:33
  Speaker 3: You don't buy you just use this.
• 1:03:35
  Speaker 1: I fly so much. I don't have to buy. I'm
• 1:03:39
  Speaker 1: a little plane. Every week, I just sample my way
• 1:03:42
  Speaker 1: through life.