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Transcript

Episode 6: Compassion · Three Rebel Souls

• 0:01
  And
• 0:01
  we're
• 0:01
  back
• 0:02
  We're
• 0:02
  on
• 0:04
  Hi,
• 0:04
  guys
• 0:05
  Hello
• 0:07
  Hello
• 0:09
  How
• 0:09
  are
• 0:09
  you
• 0:09
  guys?
• 0:11
  How
• 0:11
  are
• 0:11
  you
• 0:11
  feeling?
• 0:13
  Thinking
• 0:13
  of,
• 0:13
  how
• 0:14
  are
• 0:14
  you
• 0:14
  feeling?
• 0:14
  What's
• 0:15
  your
• 0:15
  underlying
• 0:16
  emotion
• 0:18
  of
• 0:18
  today
• 0:18
  right
• 0:18
  now?
• 0:18
  Underlying
• 0:18
  emotional
• 0:19
  state
• 0:19
  right
• 0:20
  now?
• 0:21
  Real
• 0:21
  and
• 0:22
  genuine.
• 0:23
  That's
• 0:23
  a
• 0:23
  loaded
• 0:23
  question.
• 0:23
  How
• 0:23
  does
• 0:23
  permission
• 0:23
  feel?
• 0:25
  Mm.
• 0:26
  Well,
• 0:26
  now
• 0:27
  I
• 0:27
  need
• 0:27
  to
• 0:27
  think
• 0:27
  about
• 0:27
  the
• 0:27
  real
• 0:28
  answer
• 0:28
  It
• 0:28
  really
• 0:28
  is
• 0:28
  difficult.
• 0:29
  Yeah
• 0:30
  I'd
• 0:31
  say
• 0:31
  relief
• 0:31
  for
• 0:32
  me
• 0:33
  Because
• 0:33
  I
• 0:34
  don't
• 0:34
  need
• 0:34
  surgery
• 0:35
  on
• 0:35
  my
• 0:35
  shoulder.
• 0:36
  So
• 0:37
  I'm
• 0:37
  so
• 0:37
  relieved.
• 0:38
  I'm
• 0:39
  so
• 0:39
  excited
• 0:40
  that
• 0:40
  I'm
• 0:40
  like,
• 0:40
  "Okay,
• 0:41
  this
• 0:41
  is
• 0:41
  good,
• 0:41
  and
• 0:42
  I
• 0:42
  can
• 0:42
  go
• 0:42
  back
• 0:42
  to
• 0:44
  my
• 0:44
  normal
• 0:45
  sooner
• 0:45
  than
• 0:45
  I
• 0:46
  thought."
• 0:47
  Yeah.
• 0:47
  Oh,
• 0:48
  but
• 0:48
  you
• 0:48
  know,
• 0:48
  honestly,
• 0:49
  there's
• 0:49
  also
• 0:50
  a
• 0:50
  lesson
• 0:50
  in
• 0:50
  all
• 0:50
  of
• 0:51
  this,
• 0:51
  because
• 0:51
  I've
• 0:51
  never
• 0:52
  had
• 0:52
  any
• 0:52
  surgeries.
• 0:53
  Very
• 0:54
  fortunate,
• 0:54
  I've
• 0:54
  never
• 0:54
  had
• 0:54
  any
• 0:55
  surgeries.
• 0:56
  And
• 0:56
  so,
• 0:58
  I
• 0:58
  mean,
• 0:58
  I've
• 0:59
  gotten
• 0:59
  hurt
• 1:00
  before,
• 1:00
  like
• 1:00
  I've
• 1:00
  sprained
• 1:01
  my
• 1:01
  ankles
• 1:01
  before.
• 1:02
  Um,
• 1:04
  but
• 1:05
  I
• 1:05
  really
• 1:06
  thought
• 1:06
  that
• 1:06
  I
• 1:06
  was
• 1:07
  Like,
• 1:07
  I,
• 1:07
  like,
• 1:07
  I
• 1:07
  really
• 1:08
  thought
• 1:08
  I
• 1:08
  was
• 1:08
  gonna
• 1:08
  need
• 1:09
  surgery
• 1:09
  because
• 1:09
  of
• 1:10
  the
• 1:10
  pain,
• 1:10
  and
• 1:10
  I
• 1:10
  didn't
• 1:10
  know
• 1:11
  how
• 1:11
  Anyway,
• 1:13
  I
• 1:13
  didn't
• 1:15
  So
• 1:15
  I
• 1:15
  was
• 1:15
  too
• 1:16
  afraid,
• 1:17
  uh,
• 1:17
  because
• 1:17
  of
• 1:17
  that,
• 1:18
  and
• 1:18
  so
• 1:18
  that's
• 1:19
  why
• 1:19
  I
• 1:19
  kept
• 1:19
  putting
• 1:20
  it
• 1:20
  off
• 1:20
  and
• 1:20
  putting
• 1:20
  it
• 1:20
  off,
• 1:21
  you
• 1:21
  know,
• 1:21
  procrastinating
• 1:22
  on
• 1:22
  actually
• 1:24
  getting
• 1:24
  it
• 1:24
  looked
• 1:24
  at.
• 1:25
  And
• 1:25
  now
• 1:25
  I'm
• 1:25
  like,
• 1:27
  "It's
• 1:27
  fucking
• 1:28
  nothing,"
• 1:29
  you
• 1:29
  know?
• 1:31
  So
• 1:31
  the
• 1:31
  lesson
• 1:32
  is,
• 1:32
  like,
• 1:32
  just
• 1:32
  fucking
• 1:33
  do
• 1:33
  it.
• 1:33
  Just
• 1:34
  don't
• 1:34
  be
• 1:34
  afraid
• 1:34
  and
• 1:34
  deal
• 1:35
  with
• 1:35
  it,
• 1:35
  because
• 1:35
  then
• 1:35
  the
• 1:35
  other
• 1:36
  thing
• 1:36
  that
• 1:36
  I
• 1:36
  was
• 1:36
  thinking
• 1:37
  too
• 1:37
  is
• 1:37
  like,
• 1:38
  whenever
• 1:38
  you
• 1:38
  need
• 1:38
  surgery,
• 1:39
  then
• 1:39
  there
• 1:39
  goes
• 1:39
  the
• 1:39
  summer,
• 1:41
  right?
• 1:42
  You
• 1:42
  know,
• 1:42
  like,
• 1:43
  I
• 1:43
  don't
• 1:43
  wanna
• 1:43
  be,
• 1:43
  like,
• 1:44
  doing
• 1:44
  this
• 1:44
  in
• 1:44
  the
• 1:44
  summer.
• 1:44
  Don't
• 1:45
  fuck
• 1:45
  with
• 1:45
  your
• 1:45
  beach
• 1:45
  days.
• 1:45
  Exactly.
• 1:47
  Exactly.
• 1:47
  So
• 1:48
  it's
• 1:48
  a
• 1:48
  good
• 1:48
  lesson
• 1:48
  to
• 1:48
  just,
• 1:49
  you
• 1:49
  know,
• 1:50
  stop
• 1:50
  assuming
• 1:50
  things
• 1:51
  or
• 1:51
  don't
• 1:51
  let
• 1:51
  the
• 1:52
  fear-
• 1:53
  Mm
• 1:53
  get
• 1:54
  in
• 1:54
  the
• 1:54
  way,
• 1:54
  and
• 1:54
  just
• 1:54
  get
• 1:55
  it
• 1:55
  checked
• 1:55
  out.
• 1:56
  But,
• 1:57
  you
• 1:57
  know,
• 1:58
  always
• 1:58
  work
• 1:59
  to
• 1:59
  be
• 1:59
  done.
• 2:00
  So
• 2:00
  yeah,
• 2:00
  so
• 2:01
  relief
• 2:01
  is
• 2:01
  a
• 2:02
  big
• 2:02
  one
• 2:02
  for
• 2:02
  me
• 2:02
  today.
• 2:03
  Uh,
• 2:04
  I
• 2:04
  am
• 2:05
  feeling
• 2:06
  I
• 2:06
  can
• 2:06
  get
• 2:06
  the
• 2:07
  right
• 2:07
  word.
• 2:07
  I'm
• 2:07
  feeling
• 2:09
  stressed
• 2:10
  because
• 2:10
  there's
• 2:11
  still
• 2:11
  far
• 2:11
  too
• 2:11
  many
• 2:12
  things
• 2:12
  on
• 2:12
  my
• 2:12
  plate.
• 2:14
  Mm-hmm.
• 2:14
  And
• 2:14
  I've
• 2:14
  been
• 2:15
  feeling
• 2:15
  it
• 2:15
  here,
• 2:16
  which
• 2:17
  tells
• 2:17
  me
• 2:18
  my
• 2:18
  Botox
• 2:19
  is
• 2:19
  overdue.
• 2:20
  Oh.
• 2:21
  I
• 2:21
  need
• 2:21
  to
• 2:21
  get
• 2:21
  her
• 2:21
  to
• 2:21
  shoot
• 2:22
  up
• 2:22
  my
• 2:22
  jaws
• 2:22
  again
• 2:23
  so
• 2:23
  I
• 2:23
  stop
• 2:23
  clenching
• 2:24
  my
• 2:25
  teeth-
• 2:25
  Yeah
• 2:25
  clenching
• 2:25
  my
• 2:26
  jaw.
• 2:27
  That's
• 2:27
  where
• 2:28
  I
• 2:28
  feel
• 2:28
  it
• 2:28
  the
• 2:28
  most
• 2:29
  right
• 2:29
  now.
• 2:30
  But
• 2:30
  I've
• 2:30
  been
• 2:31
  trying-
• 2:32
  Are
• 2:32
  you
• 2:32
  getting
• 2:32
  headaches?
• 2:33
  Huh?
• 2:33
  Are
• 2:33
  you
• 2:33
  getting
• 2:33
  headaches?
• 2:33
  Yes.
• 2:34
  Oh,
• 2:35
  yeah.
• 2:36
  So
• 2:36
  I've
• 2:36
  been,
• 2:36
  I've
• 2:36
  been
• 2:37
  trying
• 2:37
  to
• 2:38
  do
• 2:38
  more
• 2:39
  massage
• 2:40
  and
• 2:42
  go
• 2:42
  a
• 2:42
  little
• 2:43
  easier.
• 2:43
  I'm
• 2:43
  surprised
• 2:43
  that's
• 2:43
  not
• 2:43
  covered
• 2:43
  by
• 2:43
  insurance,
• 2:44
  just
• 2:45
  because
• 2:45
  it's-
• 2:45
  Go
• 2:45
  a
• 2:45
  little
• 2:45
  easier
• 2:46
  on
• 2:46
  myself
• 2:46
  you
• 2:46
  know,
• 2:47
  it's
• 2:47
  not
• 2:47
  cosmetic
• 2:48
  that
• 2:48
  while
• 2:48
  you're
• 2:48
  doing
• 2:48
  it.
• 2:49
  Right.
• 2:51
  Are
• 2:51
  you
• 2:51
  sure
• 2:51
  it's
• 2:51
  not
• 2:51
  covered?
• 2:53
  Well,
• 2:53
  the
• 2:53
  place
• 2:53
  I
• 2:53
  go
• 2:54
  doesn't
• 2:54
  accept
• 2:55
  insurance-
• 2:55
  Oh
• 2:55
  but
• 2:56
  that
• 2:56
  would
• 2:56
  probably
• 2:56
  be
• 2:56
  a
• 2:56
  good
• 2:56
  thing
• 2:57
  for
• 2:57
  me
• 2:57
  to
• 2:57
  look
• 2:57
  into.
• 2:58
  Yeah.
• 2:59
  But
• 2:59
  I
• 3:00
  also
• 3:00
  did
• 3:01
  a
• 3:01
  tiny
• 3:01
  bit
• 3:02
  of
• 3:02
  stress
• 3:02
  relief
• 3:03
  over
• 3:03
  the
• 3:03
  weekend.
• 3:03
  Let
• 3:03
  me
• 3:03
  show
• 3:03
  you
• 3:04
  Look
• 3:04
  at
• 3:04
  my
• 3:04
  new
• 3:05
  Lego
• 3:05
  flowers
• 3:07
  Those
• 3:07
  don't
• 3:07
  even
• 3:07
  look
• 3:07
  like
• 3:07
  Lego
• 3:07
  You
• 3:07
  put
• 3:07
  all
• 3:07
  that
• 3:07
  together?
• 3:08
  It's
• 3:09
  my
• 3:09
  Lego
• 3:09
  flowers.
• 3:10
  Oh
• 3:10
  my
• 3:10
  God,
• 3:11
  they're
• 3:11
  beautiful.
• 3:12
  Aren't
• 3:12
  they?
• 3:13
  Magnolia
• 3:14
  branches.
• 3:16
  They're
• 3:16
  the
• 3:16
  pre-
• 3:16
  I
• 3:17
  was
• 3:17
  like,
• 3:17
  "These
• 3:17
  are
• 3:17
  my
• 3:17
  favorite
• 3:18
  ones
• 3:18
  yet.
• 3:18
  I
• 3:18
  might
• 3:18
  need
• 3:18
  to
• 3:18
  get-
• 3:19
  So
• 3:19
  pretty
• 3:19
  two
• 3:19
  or
• 3:19
  three
• 3:19
  more
• 3:19
  sets
• 3:20
  of
• 3:20
  these.
• 3:20
  Yeah.
• 3:22
  Really
• 3:22
  pretty.
• 3:24
  So
• 3:24
  they
• 3:24
  don't
• 3:24
  look
• 3:24
  like
• 3:25
  Legos.
• 3:26
  No,
• 3:27
  not
• 3:27
  at
• 3:27
  all.
• 3:28
  Crazy,
• 3:28
  right?
• 3:29
  They're
• 3:29
  beautiful
• 3:30
  That
• 3:30
  was
• 3:31
  my
• 3:31
  one
• 3:31
  stress
• 3:31
  relief
• 3:32
  for
• 3:32
  the
• 3:32
  weekend,
• 3:32
  'cause
• 3:32
  I
• 3:33
  find
• 3:33
  that
• 3:33
  very
• 3:33
  meditative.
• 3:34
  Like,
• 3:34
  my
• 3:34
  hands
• 3:34
  and
• 3:34
  my
• 3:34
  mind
• 3:35
  are
• 3:35
  busy
• 3:35
  and
• 3:35
  everything
• 3:36
  else
• 3:36
  melts
• 3:36
  away.
• 3:37
  Yeah.
• 3:38
  How
• 3:39
  are
• 3:39
  you
• 3:39
  feeling,
• 3:40
  Sloane?
• 3:42
  Tired?
• 3:43
  Mm.
• 3:45
  Six
• 3:45
  hours
• 3:45
  sleep
• 3:45
  again
• 3:47
  Probably
• 3:47
  around
• 3:47
  there,
• 3:48
  but
• 3:48
  I
• 3:48
  woke
• 3:48
  up
• 3:48
  at
• 3:48
  3:00,
• 3:49
  so...
• 3:51
  And
• 3:51
  I
• 3:51
  got
• 3:52
  a
• 3:52
  little
• 3:52
  nap
• 3:53
  in
• 3:53
  there
• 3:53
  somewhere.
• 3:54
  But
• 3:56
  yeah
• 3:57
  Tired.
• 3:58
  Um,
• 3:59
  yeah,
• 3:59
  just
• 3:59
  tired.
• 4:01
  Yeah.
• 4:02
  I
• 4:02
  don't...
• 4:02
  I,
• 4:03
  I
• 4:03
  could
• 4:03
  dig
• 4:04
  further
• 4:04
  into
• 4:04
  more
• 4:05
  stuff,
• 4:06
  but
• 4:07
  that's
• 4:07
  the
• 4:08
  overarching
• 4:09
  theme
• 4:10
  I
• 4:10
  will
• 4:10
  add
• 4:11
  one,
• 4:11
  though,
• 4:11
  and
• 4:11
  I
• 4:12
  think
• 4:12
  that
• 4:12
  I
• 4:12
  speak
• 4:12
  for
• 4:12
  the
• 4:13
  three
• 4:13
  of
• 4:13
  us,
• 4:13
  but
• 4:13
  you
• 4:13
  let
• 4:13
  me
• 4:13
  know
• 4:14
  if
• 4:14
  I'm
• 4:14
  wrong.
• 4:15
  Excited?
• 4:16
  Oh,
• 4:16
  yeah.
• 4:18
  Right?
• 4:18
  About
• 4:18
  what
• 4:18
  are
• 4:18
  we
• 4:18
  saying-
• 4:19
  Excited
• 4:19
  to
• 4:19
  be
• 4:19
  here
• 4:19
  and
• 4:19
  doing
• 4:19
  this.
• 4:20
  Just
• 4:20
  to
• 4:20
  be
• 4:20
  here,
• 4:20
  yeah.
• 4:21
  Just
• 4:21
  to
• 4:21
  be
• 4:21
  here.
• 4:22
  This
• 4:22
  is
• 4:22
  stress
• 4:22
  relief
• 4:23
  for
• 4:23
  me.
• 4:23
  Yeah.
• 4:24
  Absolutely.
• 4:25
  Just
• 4:26
  having
• 4:26
  our
• 4:26
  chats.
• 4:27
  Yes.
• 4:28
  And,
• 4:29
  um,
• 4:31
  yeah,
• 4:31
  so
• 4:31
  we're
• 4:31
  continuing
• 4:32
  today
• 4:32
  with
• 4:33
  one
• 4:33
  more
• 4:34
  of
• 4:34
  our
• 4:34
  values,
• 4:36
  compassion.
• 4:38
  And,
• 4:38
  um,
• 4:40
  I
• 4:40
  will
• 4:40
  read
• 4:42
  w-
• 4:42
  how
• 4:43
  we
• 4:43
  define
• 4:43
  compassion.
• 4:45
  And
• 4:45
  that
• 4:45
  is,
• 4:46
  we
• 4:46
  lead
• 4:46
  with
• 4:46
  love
• 4:47
  for
• 4:48
  ourselves
• 4:48
  and
• 4:49
  for
• 4:49
  others.
• 4:50
  We
• 4:50
  meet
• 4:51
  in
• 4:51
  the
• 4:51
  mess
• 4:51
  with
• 4:51
  open
• 4:52
  hearts
• 4:52
  and
• 4:52
  fierce
• 4:53
  kindness.
• 4:54
  We're
• 4:54
  not
• 4:54
  here
• 4:54
  to
• 4:54
  perform
• 4:55
  healing.
• 4:56
  We
• 4:56
  don't
• 4:56
  try
• 4:56
  to
• 4:56
  fix
• 4:57
  or
• 4:57
  save.
• 4:58
  We
• 4:58
  witness,
• 4:59
  support,
• 4:59
  and
• 4:59
  remind
• 5:00
  each
• 5:00
  other
• 5:00
  of
• 5:01
  our
• 5:01
  own
• 5:01
  strength
• 5:03
  Okay,
• 5:03
  so
• 5:05
  Who
• 5:05
  wrote
• 5:05
  that?
• 5:06
  It's
• 5:06
  fantastic
• 5:08
  Good
• 5:08
  definition.
• 5:09
  So,
• 5:11
  as
• 5:11
  we
• 5:11
  discuss
• 5:12
  compassion
• 5:12
  today,
• 5:14
  um,
• 5:16
  what
• 5:16
  does
• 5:16
  that
• 5:16
  actually
• 5:16
  look
• 5:17
  like
• 5:18
  in
• 5:18
  your
• 5:18
  world?
• 5:20
  I
• 5:20
  think
• 5:20
  what
• 5:20
  jumps
• 5:21
  out
• 5:21
  to
• 5:21
  me,
• 5:22
  um,
• 5:24
  today
• 5:25
  is
• 5:25
  the
• 5:25
  fierce
• 5:26
  kindness.
• 5:26
  Like,
• 5:27
  I
• 5:27
  was
• 5:27
  giggling
• 5:29
  when
• 5:29
  you
• 5:29
  read
• 5:30
  that
• 5:30
  because
• 5:32
  that's...
• 5:33
  I
• 5:33
  don't
• 5:33
  know,
• 5:34
  I
• 5:34
  think
• 5:34
  that's
• 5:34
  accurate
• 5:35
  in
• 5:37
  how
• 5:37
  I
• 5:37
  present
• 5:38
  things,
• 5:38
  you
• 5:38
  know?
• 5:39
  I'm
• 5:39
  pretty
• 5:41
  Adept
• 5:41
  at
• 5:42
  delivering
• 5:43
  love,
• 5:44
  love
• 5:44
  bitch
• 5:44
  slaps.
• 5:45
  Um
• 5:47
  Love
• 5:47
  that.
• 5:49
  As
• 5:49
  Bree
• 5:49
  so
• 5:49
  kindly
• 5:50
  put
• 5:50
  it.
• 5:51
  That's
• 5:51
  a
• 5:51
  love
• 5:52
  bitch
• 5:52
  slap
• 5:52
  right
• 5:52
  there.
• 5:53
  Oh.
• 5:54
  Like,
• 5:54
  okay,
• 5:55
  as
• 5:55
  long
• 5:55
  as
• 5:55
  you
• 5:55
  know
• 5:55
  it's
• 5:55
  love.
• 5:56
  Um,
• 5:58
  because
• 5:59
  what's
• 5:59
  coming
• 5:59
  to
• 5:59
  mind
• 5:59
  is,
• 6:00
  like,
• 6:02
  Simon
• 6:02
  Sinek
• 6:03
  talks
• 6:03
  about
• 6:03
  be
• 6:03
  kind,
• 6:04
  not
• 6:04
  nice,
• 6:05
  right?
• 6:05
  Mm.
• 6:05
  Like,
• 6:07
  um,
• 6:08
  nice
• 6:08
  is
• 6:08
  surface.
• 6:09
  Nice
• 6:09
  is
• 6:11
  No,
• 6:12
  everything's
• 6:12
  fine.
• 6:14
  Um-
• 6:14
  Yeah
• 6:15
  temporary
• 6:17
  comfort,
• 6:18
  whereas
• 6:19
  kindness
• 6:19
  is
• 6:20
  really
• 6:22
  a
• 6:22
  more
• 6:22
  active
• 6:23
  way
• 6:23
  to
• 6:24
  show
• 6:24
  care
• 6:25
  and
• 6:25
  support.
• 6:26
  Um,
• 6:27
  just
• 6:28
  adding
• 6:28
  that
• 6:28
  little
• 6:29
  fierceness
• 6:29
  there
• 6:30
  made,
• 6:31
  made
• 6:31
  it
• 6:31
  very,
• 6:32
  um
• 6:33
  entertaining
• 6:34
  for
• 6:34
  me
• 6:35
  'cause
• 6:35
  I
• 6:35
  feel
• 6:35
  like
• 6:36
  that's
• 6:36
  how
• 6:36
  it
• 6:36
  comes
• 6:37
  out
• 6:38
  sometimes.
• 6:39
  It's
• 6:39
  a
• 6:39
  little
• 6:40
  fierce,
• 6:40
  and
• 6:42
  the
• 6:43
  way
• 6:43
  that
• 6:43
  we
• 6:43
  support
• 6:44
  each
• 6:44
  other,
• 6:44
  right?
• 6:44
  Like-
• 6:45
  Yeah
• 6:45
  if
• 6:46
  you're
• 6:47
  saying
• 6:47
  something,
• 6:49
  I'm
• 6:49
  like,
• 6:50
  "Don't
• 6:51
  you
• 6:51
  talk
• 6:51
  about
• 6:51
  my
• 6:51
  friend
• 6:51
  like
• 6:52
  that."
• 6:52
  Um.
• 6:53
  Even
• 6:54
  if
• 6:54
  you're
• 6:54
  the
• 6:54
  friend
• 6:55
  or
• 6:55
  what
• 6:55
  that's
• 6:55
  talking
• 6:56
  like
• 6:56
  that.
• 6:57
  Right,
• 6:57
  right.
• 6:58
  I
• 6:58
  mean.
• 6:58
  If
• 6:58
  it's
• 6:58
  you
• 6:58
  talking
• 6:59
  about
• 6:59
  yourself-
• 6:59
  Right
• 7:00
  don't
• 7:00
  talk
• 7:00
  about
• 7:00
  my
• 7:00
  friend
• 7:01
  like
• 7:01
  that.
• 7:02
  Love
• 7:03
  that.
• 7:04
  I
• 7:04
  know,
• 7:05
  but
• 7:05
  that's
• 7:05
  so
• 7:05
  good,
• 7:05
  'cause
• 7:05
  it's
• 7:06
  such
• 7:06
  a
• 7:06
  good
• 7:06
  reminder
• 7:07
  then
• 7:08
  for
• 7:08
  the
• 7:09
  friend
• 7:11
  to
• 7:11
  be
• 7:11
  like,
• 7:11
  "Right,
• 7:12
  I'm
• 7:12
  gonna
• 7:12
  be,
• 7:12
  I'm
• 7:12
  gonna
• 7:12
  be
• 7:12
  kinder
• 7:13
  to
• 7:13
  myself."
• 7:14
  Right?
• 7:15
  Yeah.
• 7:16
  What
• 7:16
  would
• 7:16
  you
• 7:16
  say
• 7:17
  to
• 7:17
  me
• 7:17
  if
• 7:17
  I
• 7:17
  said
• 7:18
  that?
• 7:18
  And
• 7:18
  then
• 7:18
  like,
• 7:19
  "Okay,
• 7:19
  take
• 7:19
  your
• 7:19
  own
• 7:20
  advice."
• 7:20
  Like-
• 7:20
  Right,
• 7:21
  exactly
• 7:21
  we
• 7:21
  turn
• 7:21
  things
• 7:21
  around
• 7:21
  on
• 7:22
  each
• 7:22
  other
• 7:22
  all
• 7:22
  the
• 7:22
  time.
• 7:23
  I
• 7:23
  love
• 7:23
  that
• 7:24
  you
• 7:24
  brought
• 7:24
  that
• 7:24
  up,
• 7:24
  because
• 7:25
  that's
• 7:25
  actually
• 7:25
  one
• 7:25
  of
• 7:25
  the
• 7:25
  things
• 7:26
  that
• 7:26
  I
• 7:26
  was
• 7:26
  thinking
• 7:26
  about
• 7:27
  today.
• 7:28
  Um,
• 7:29
  it's
• 7:29
  this
• 7:29
  concept
• 7:30
  that
• 7:30
  I
• 7:30
  had
• 7:30
  read
• 7:30
  about
• 7:31
  a
• 7:31
  while
• 7:31
  ago
• 7:31
  and
• 7:31
  kind
• 7:32
  of
• 7:32
  forgot
• 7:32
  about,
• 7:33
  and
• 7:33
  then
• 7:33
  it
• 7:34
  resurfaced.
• 7:35
  Um,
• 7:36
  and
• 7:36
  I
• 7:36
  don't,
• 7:36
  I
• 7:36
  can't
• 7:37
  remember
• 7:37
  if
• 7:38
  we've
• 7:38
  ever
• 7:38
  talked
• 7:38
  about
• 7:39
  this
• 7:39
  before
• 7:40
  directly,
• 7:41
  um,
• 7:42
  but
• 7:42
  the
• 7:42
  difference
• 7:43
  between
• 7:43
  idiot
• 7:44
  compassion
• 7:45
  and
• 7:45
  wise
• 7:45
  compassion.
• 7:47
  Have
• 7:47
  we
• 7:47
  talked
• 7:47
  about
• 7:47
  this?
• 7:48
  Oh,
• 7:48
  I
• 7:48
  don't
• 7:48
  think
• 7:48
  so.
• 7:49
  But
• 7:49
  please
• 7:49
  go
• 7:50
  on.
• 7:50
  Okay.
• 7:51
  So,
• 7:51
  I
• 7:51
  mean-
• 7:52
  Idiot
• 7:52
  compassion.
• 7:52
  It's
• 7:53
  exactly
• 7:53
  what
• 7:54
  Sloan
• 7:54
  just
• 7:54
  said,
• 7:55
  but
• 7:55
  idiot
• 7:55
  compassion
• 7:56
  is
• 7:56
  that
• 7:56
  sort
• 7:57
  of
• 7:57
  like
• 7:58
  it's
• 7:59
  the
• 7:59
  kindness,
• 8:00
  it's
• 8:00
  the
• 8:00
  enabling,
• 8:01
  it's
• 8:01
  the
• 8:01
  telling
• 8:02
  people
• 8:02
  what
• 8:02
  they
• 8:02
  wanna
• 8:03
  hear
• 8:03
  for,
• 8:03
  like,
• 8:04
  temporary
• 8:05
  relief-
• 8:06
  Mm-hmm
• 8:06
  of
• 8:06
  whatever
• 8:07
  it
• 8:07
  is.
• 8:07
  The
• 8:07
  nice.
• 8:07
  The
• 8:08
  nice.
• 8:08
  Yes,
• 8:08
  it's
• 8:08
  the
• 8:08
  niceties.
• 8:10
  And
• 8:10
  wise
• 8:11
  compassion
• 8:12
  is
• 8:12
  truth
• 8:12
  even
• 8:13
  when
• 8:13
  it's
• 8:13
  hard.
• 8:14
  Yes.
• 8:14
  Right?
• 8:15
  It's
• 8:15
  the
• 8:15
  things
• 8:15
  that
• 8:16
  are
• 8:16
  like...
• 8:17
  Or
• 8:17
  how
• 8:17
  do
• 8:17
  we
• 8:17
  sit
• 8:18
  with
• 8:18
  someone
• 8:19
  in
• 8:19
  a
• 8:19
  really,
• 8:20
  like,
• 8:20
  honest,
• 8:21
  uncomfortable
• 8:21
  way?
• 8:22
  We
• 8:22
  aren't
• 8:22
  gonna,
• 8:22
  like,
• 8:23
  deliver
• 8:24
  these
• 8:24
  sort
• 8:24
  of
• 8:24
  canned
• 8:25
  niceties
• 8:26
  just
• 8:26
  usually
• 8:27
  to
• 8:27
  make
• 8:27
  ourselves
• 8:27
  more
• 8:28
  comfortable
• 8:28
  with
• 8:28
  whatever-
• 8:29
  Mm.
• 8:30
  we're
• 8:30
  sitting
• 8:30
  with-
• 8:31
  Right
• 8:31
  as
• 8:31
  well,
• 8:31
  right?
• 8:31
  So
• 8:32
  it's,
• 8:32
  it's
• 8:33
  tr-
• 8:33
  Like,
• 8:33
  the
• 8:33
  wise
• 8:34
  compassion
• 8:35
  is
• 8:35
  a
• 8:35
  true
• 8:35
  form
• 8:36
  of
• 8:36
  support.
• 8:37
  But
• 8:37
  it's,
• 8:37
  it's,
• 8:38
  like,
• 8:38
  the
• 8:39
  most
• 8:39
  pure
• 8:40
  form
• 8:40
  of
• 8:40
  kindness,
• 8:41
  even
• 8:42
  if
• 8:42
  sometimes
• 8:43
  it's
• 8:43
  hard
• 8:45
  to
• 8:45
  show
• 8:45
  up
• 8:46
  in
• 8:46
  that
• 8:46
  way,
• 8:46
  right?
• 8:47
  Like,
• 8:47
  to,
• 8:48
  to
• 8:48
  tell
• 8:48
  the
• 8:48
  truth
• 8:49
  in
• 8:49
  that
• 8:50
  situation.
• 8:50
  Or
• 8:51
  to
• 8:52
  show
• 8:52
  up
• 8:52
  for
• 8:52
  someone
• 8:53
  in
• 8:53
  a
• 8:53
  way
• 8:53
  that's
• 8:53
  uncomfortable.
• 8:54
  Yeah.
• 8:56
  And
• 8:56
  a
• 8:57
  little
• 8:57
  truth
• 8:58
  there.
• 8:58
  A
• 8:59
  plug
• 8:59
  for
• 8:59
  our
• 8:59
  next
• 9:00
  value.
• 9:02
  Yeah.
• 9:02
  Yeah.
• 9:03
  Yeah.
• 9:03
  Great.
• 9:04
  Yeah.
• 9:04
  I,
• 9:04
  well,
• 9:04
  I
• 9:04
  feel
• 9:05
  like,
• 9:05
  too,
• 9:05
  like,
• 9:06
  leading
• 9:06
  with
• 9:07
  love,
• 9:08
  I
• 9:08
  think
• 9:08
  that
• 9:09
  can
• 9:09
  get
• 9:09
  misconstrued,
• 9:10
  too,
• 9:10
  right?
• 9:10
  Because
• 9:11
  I
• 9:11
  feel
• 9:11
  like,
• 9:12
  again,
• 9:12
  like
• 9:13
  so
• 9:13
  many
• 9:13
  people
• 9:14
  can
• 9:14
  look
• 9:15
  at,
• 9:15
  like,
• 9:15
  leading
• 9:15
  with
• 9:15
  love
• 9:16
  means
• 9:16
  to
• 9:17
  be
• 9:17
  nice.
• 9:18
  Mm-hmm.
• 9:18
  Right?
• 9:19
  And
• 9:20
  not
• 9:20
  be,
• 9:21
  be
• 9:22
  honest.
• 9:23
  Mm-hmm.
• 9:24
  I
• 9:25
  don't
• 9:25
  know
• 9:25
  any
• 9:25
  other
• 9:25
  way.
• 9:26
  Yeah.
• 9:26
  I
• 9:27
  don't
• 9:27
  know
• 9:27
  any
• 9:27
  other
• 9:27
  way
• 9:27
  than
• 9:27
  honest,
• 9:28
  you
• 9:29
  know?
• 9:29
  Well,
• 9:30
  it's,
• 9:30
  so
• 9:30
  it's
• 9:30
  interesting
• 9:31
  'cause
• 9:31
  I
• 9:31
  also
• 9:31
  feel
• 9:32
  like
• 9:32
  it's
• 9:32
  a
• 9:32
  Northeast
• 9:33
  thing-
• 9:33
  Mm
• 9:34
  that
• 9:34
  we,
• 9:34
  we
• 9:35
  actually
• 9:35
  may
• 9:35
  be
• 9:35
  a
• 9:35
  bit
• 9:35
  more
• 9:35
  used
• 9:36
  to
• 9:36
  that.
• 9:37
  Which-
• 9:37
  Mm
• 9:38
  like
• 9:38
  we
• 9:38
  say,
• 9:39
  like
• 9:39
  I
• 9:39
  say
• 9:39
  this
• 9:39
  all
• 9:39
  the
• 9:40
  time,
• 9:40
  like
• 9:40
  I
• 9:40
  live
• 9:40
  in
• 9:41
  Massachusetts,
• 9:41
  and
• 9:42
  everyone
• 9:42
  here
• 9:42
  is
• 9:43
  referred
• 9:43
  to
• 9:43
  as
• 9:44
  a
• 9:44
  Masshole.
• 9:45
  But-
• 9:45
  Mm.
• 9:45
  What?
• 9:45
  Massachusetts
• 9:46
  people
• 9:46
  are
• 9:46
  known
• 9:47
  for
• 9:48
  being
• 9:49
  kind
• 9:49
  but
• 9:50
  not
• 9:50
  nice.
• 9:51
  Mm.
• 9:51
  When
• 9:52
  you
• 9:52
  hear
• 9:52
  people
• 9:53
  from
• 9:53
  Massachusetts
• 9:53
  speak
• 9:54
  to
• 9:54
  one
• 9:54
  of,
• 9:54
  they
• 9:54
  don't
• 9:55
  sound
• 9:55
  like
• 9:55
  they're
• 9:55
  being
• 9:55
  nice,
• 9:56
  but
• 9:56
  they're
• 9:56
  actually
• 9:57
  some
• 9:57
  of
• 9:57
  the
• 9:57
  most
• 9:57
  kind
• 9:58
  people
• 9:59
  I've
• 9:59
  ever
• 9:59
  been
• 9:59
  around,
• 10:00
  right?
• 10:00
  Yeah.
• 10:00
  And
• 10:00
  I
• 10:00
  saw
• 10:01
  this
• 10:01
  hilarious,
• 10:02
  um,
• 10:03
  TikTok
• 10:04
  video
• 10:04
  of
• 10:04
  this
• 10:04
  girl
• 10:04
  who
• 10:05
  was,
• 10:05
  like
• 10:05
  visiting
• 10:05
  a
• 10:05
  friend
• 10:06
  here
• 10:06
  during
• 10:06
  a
• 10:06
  snowstorm,
• 10:07
  and
• 10:08
  she
• 10:08
  was
• 10:08
  like,
• 10:08
  "I
• 10:08
  was
• 10:08
  trying
• 10:09
  to
• 10:09
  back
• 10:09
  out
• 10:10
  of
• 10:10
  her
• 10:10
  driveway,
• 10:10
  like
• 10:11
  before
• 10:11
  we
• 10:11
  had
• 10:11
  cleared
• 10:12
  any
• 10:12
  of
• 10:12
  the
• 10:12
  snow,
• 10:13
  and
• 10:13
  I
• 10:13
  got
• 10:13
  stuck.
• 10:14
  And
• 10:15
  the
• 10:15
  two
• 10:15
  guys
• 10:15
  that
• 10:15
  were
• 10:15
  next
• 10:16
  door
• 10:16
  shoveling
• 10:17
  their
• 10:17
  driveway
• 10:18
  came
• 10:18
  over
• 10:19
  and
• 10:20
  shoveled
• 10:20
  me
• 10:21
  out.
• 10:21
  But
• 10:21
  while
• 10:21
  they
• 10:22
  were
• 10:22
  shoveling
• 10:22
  me
• 10:22
  out,
• 10:23
  they
• 10:23
  were
• 10:23
  like,
• 10:23
  'What
• 10:24
  is
• 10:24
  it,
• 10:24
  your
• 10:24
  first
• 10:24
  time
• 10:24
  driving
• 10:25
  a
• 10:25
  fucking
• 10:25
  car?'
• 10:26
  Like,
• 10:26
  'Have
• 10:26
  you
• 10:26
  ever
• 10:27
  driven
• 10:27
  in
• 10:27
  the
• 10:27
  snow
• 10:27
  before,
• 10:28
  you
• 10:28
  idiot?'"
• 10:28
  And
• 10:29
  they're
• 10:29
  like
• 10:29
  berating
• 10:30
  her
• 10:31
  while
• 10:31
  doing,
• 10:32
  like
• 10:32
  the
• 10:32
  most
• 10:33
  kind,
• 10:33
  helpful
• 10:34
  thing.
• 10:34
  And
• 10:34
  she's
• 10:34
  like,
• 10:34
  "It's
• 10:35
  the
• 10:35
  most
• 10:35
  Massachusetts
• 10:36
  thing
• 10:36
  I've
• 10:36
  ever
• 10:36
  experienced
• 10:37
  in
• 10:37
  my
• 10:37
  life."
• 10:38
  And
• 10:38
  I
• 10:38
  just,
• 10:39
  I
• 10:39
  think
• 10:39
  that's-
• 10:40
  It's
• 10:40
  honest
• 10:41
  it's
• 10:41
  a
• 10:41
  hilarious
• 10:42
  example.
• 10:42
  Like,
• 10:42
  we're
• 10:42
  deeply
• 10:43
  compassionate.
• 10:44
  I
• 10:44
  feel
• 10:45
  like
• 10:45
  we're
• 10:45
  kind
• 10:45
  of
• 10:45
  known
• 10:46
  here
• 10:46
  for
• 10:46
  having
• 10:46
  like,
• 10:47
  you
• 10:47
  know,
• 10:47
  great
• 10:48
  policies
• 10:48
  and,
• 10:48
  like
• 10:48
  truly
• 10:49
  caring
• 10:49
  people
• 10:50
  and
• 10:50
  it's,
• 10:51
  it's
• 10:51
  a
• 10:51
  very
• 10:51
  like,
• 10:51
  kind
• 10:52
  of
• 10:52
  safe
• 10:52
  space,
• 10:52
  but
• 10:54
  they're
• 10:54
  not
• 10:55
  gonna
• 10:55
  be
• 10:55
  nice
• 10:55
  about
• 10:55
  it.
• 10:57
  Yeah.
• 10:57
  Well,
• 10:57
  I
• 10:57
  don't
• 10:57
  know
• 10:57
  if
• 10:57
  I
• 10:57
  can
• 10:58
  say
• 10:58
  the
• 10:58
  same.
• 10:58
  But
• 10:58
  I'll
• 10:58
  take,
• 10:58
  I'll
• 10:58
  take
• 10:59
  the
• 10:59
  true
• 10:59
  kindness
• 10:59
  any
• 11:00
  day.
• 11:01
  Yeah.
• 11:01
  Yeah.
• 11:03
  I
• 11:03
  was
• 11:03
  gonna
• 11:03
  say,
• 11:03
  I
• 11:03
  don't
• 11:03
  know
• 11:03
  if
• 11:04
  I'd
• 11:04
  say
• 11:04
  the
• 11:04
  same
• 11:05
  thing
• 11:05
  for
• 11:05
  New
• 11:05
  Jersey
• 11:06
  and
• 11:06
  New
• 11:06
  York.
• 11:07
  But
• 11:07
  I
• 11:07
  feel
• 11:08
  like
• 11:08
  they're
• 11:08
  honest
• 11:08
  anyway,
• 11:09
  you
• 11:10
  know?
• 11:10
  Yeah,
• 11:10
  that's
• 11:10
  true.
• 11:11
  They're
• 11:11
  honest.
• 11:11
  Maybe
• 11:11
  it's
• 11:11
  a
• 11:11
  bit
• 11:12
  more
• 11:12
  harsh.
• 11:13
  It's
• 11:13
  a
• 11:13
  little
• 11:13
  more
• 11:13
  harsh,
• 11:14
  so
• 11:14
  it's
• 11:14
  kind
• 11:14
  of
• 11:14
  a
• 11:14
  little
• 11:15
  more
• 11:15
  up
• 11:15
  my
• 11:15
  valley,
• 11:15
  'cause...
• 11:16
  Valley?
• 11:17
  Alley.
• 11:17
  Alley.
• 11:19
  We're
• 11:19
  nowhere
• 11:19
  near
• 11:19
  valleys
• 11:20
  around
• 11:20
  here.
• 11:21
  Um-
• 11:22
  So,
• 11:25
  yeah,
• 11:25
  'cause,
• 11:25
  you
• 11:26
  know,
• 11:26
  people
• 11:26
  will
• 11:26
  dish
• 11:27
  it.
• 11:28
  People
• 11:28
  dish
• 11:28
  it
• 11:29
  around
• 11:29
  here,
• 11:29
  and
• 11:29
  I'm
• 11:29
  like,
• 11:29
  "All
• 11:30
  right.
• 11:31
  You
• 11:31
  better
• 11:31
  be
• 11:31
  able
• 11:31
  to
• 11:31
  take
• 11:32
  it,
• 11:32
  too."
• 11:32
  Mm.
• 11:33
  Um,
• 11:35
  so
• 11:35
  yeah,
• 11:35
  I
• 11:35
  feel
• 11:35
  like,
• 11:36
  you
• 11:36
  know,
• 11:36
  that
• 11:38
  for
• 11:38
  me,
• 11:38
  for
• 11:38
  me
• 11:38
  it's
• 11:39
  the,
• 11:39
  the
• 11:39
  whole
• 11:41
  being
• 11:41
  kind
• 11:41
  but
• 11:42
  being
• 11:42
  honest,
• 11:42
  which
• 11:43
  sometimes
• 11:43
  it
• 11:43
  doesn't
• 11:44
  feel
• 11:44
  like
• 11:44
  it's,
• 11:45
  like
• 11:45
  I'm
• 11:45
  being
• 11:45
  kind
• 11:46
  because
• 11:47
  I
• 11:47
  am
• 11:47
  so-
• 11:48
  Yeah
• 11:49
  honest.
• 11:50
  Like,
• 11:50
  like,
• 11:50
  so,
• 11:51
  um,
• 11:52
  what's
• 11:52
  the
• 11:52
  word?
• 11:53
  Um,
• 11:53
  blunt
• 11:54
  sometimes.
• 11:55
  So,
• 11:56
  um,
• 11:58
  which
• 11:58
  is
• 11:58
  funny
• 11:58
  'cause
• 11:58
  actually,
• 11:59
  I
• 11:59
  just
• 11:59
  really
• 12:00
  quick
• 12:00
  to
• 12:00
  sidetrack,
• 12:01
  I
• 12:01
  had
• 12:01
  another
• 12:02
  dream
• 12:02
  last
• 12:02
  night.
• 12:03
  I
• 12:03
  had
• 12:03
  a
• 12:04
  crazy
• 12:04
  dream
• 12:04
  last
• 12:04
  night,
• 12:05
  but
• 12:05
  we'll
• 12:05
  tell
• 12:05
  you,
• 12:05
  we'll
• 12:06
  talk
• 12:06
  about
• 12:06
  that
• 12:06
  another
• 12:06
  time.
• 12:07
  But
• 12:07
  I
• 12:07
  had
• 12:07
  this
• 12:07
  dream
• 12:08
  last
• 12:08
  night
• 12:08
  that
• 12:08
  I
• 12:08
  was
• 12:09
  in
• 12:09
  a
• 12:09
  neighbor's
• 12:09
  house,
• 12:11
  I
• 12:11
  mean,
• 12:11
  in
• 12:11
  a
• 12:11
  neighbor's
• 12:11
  apartment,
• 12:13
  and
• 12:13
  it's...
• 12:14
  I
• 12:14
  guess
• 12:14
  it
• 12:14
  was
• 12:14
  a
• 12:14
  guy's
• 12:14
  apartment,
• 12:15
  and
• 12:15
  when
• 12:15
  I
• 12:15
  walked
• 12:15
  in
• 12:15
  it
• 12:15
  was
• 12:16
  kind
• 12:16
  of,
• 12:16
  like,
• 12:16
  messy,
• 12:16
  like
• 12:17
  clothes,
• 12:17
  boxes.
• 12:18
  I
• 12:18
  don't
• 12:18
  know
• 12:18
  if
• 12:18
  moving
• 12:19
  in
• 12:19
  or
• 12:19
  out.
• 12:19
  No
• 12:19
  clue.
• 12:20
  I
• 12:20
  kind
• 12:20
  of
• 12:20
  walked
• 12:21
  out
• 12:21
  of
• 12:21
  the
• 12:21
  room
• 12:21
  and
• 12:21
  walked
• 12:21
  back
• 12:22
  in,
• 12:22
  and
• 12:22
  then
• 12:23
  there
• 12:23
  was
• 12:23
  a
• 12:23
  woman
• 12:23
  there
• 12:24
  who
• 12:24
  was,
• 12:24
  like,
• 12:24
  folding
• 12:25
  clothes.
• 12:26
  I
• 12:26
  said
• 12:26
  to
• 12:26
  her,
• 12:27
  "Men
• 12:28
  are
• 12:28
  so
• 12:28
  helpless."
• 12:29
  And
• 12:29
  as
• 12:30
  soon
• 12:30
  as
• 12:30
  I
• 12:30
  said
• 12:30
  it,
• 12:30
  'cause,
• 12:31
  you
• 12:31
  know,
• 12:32
  typical
• 12:32
  fashion,
• 12:33
  when
• 12:33
  I
• 12:33
  s-
• 12:33
  something
• 12:34
  comes
• 12:34
  out
• 12:34
  of
• 12:34
  my
• 12:34
  mouth
• 12:34
  I'm
• 12:34
  always
• 12:35
  like,
• 12:36
  you
• 12:36
  know?
• 12:36
  Like,
• 12:36
  I
• 12:37
  shock
• 12:37
  myself.
• 12:37
  Like,
• 12:37
  "Shit,
• 12:38
  I
• 12:38
  said
• 12:38
  that
• 12:38
  out
• 12:38
  loud."
• 12:39
  I'm
• 12:39
  like...
• 12:40
  I
• 12:40
  go,
• 12:40
  "I'm
• 12:40
  sorry."
• 12:41
  I'm
• 12:41
  like,
• 12:41
  "I'm
• 12:41
  so
• 12:41
  blunt."
• 12:42
  And
• 12:42
  the
• 12:42
  guy
• 12:43
  said,
• 12:43
  "Don't
• 12:44
  worry.
• 12:44
  You
• 12:44
  didn't
• 12:44
  offend
• 12:45
  me."
• 12:45
  You
• 12:46
  know?
• 12:46
  Like,
• 12:46
  "It's
• 12:46
  okay.
• 12:46
  You
• 12:46
  didn't
• 12:46
  offend
• 12:47
  me."
• 12:47
  So
• 12:48
  even
• 12:48
  in
• 12:48
  my
• 12:49
  dreams
• 12:50
  I'm,
• 12:50
  being
• 12:50
  honest
• 12:51
  and-
• 12:52
  And
• 12:52
  blunt
• 12:52
  very
• 12:52
  blunt.
• 12:54
  So...
• 12:55
  She's
• 12:55
  a
• 12:55
  straight
• 12:55
  shooter.
• 12:57
  Yeah.
• 12:58
  Um-
• 12:59
  But
• 12:59
  sometimes
• 13:01
  I
• 13:01
  feel
• 13:01
  like
• 13:01
  I'm
• 13:01
  not
• 13:02
  being
• 13:02
  kind,
• 13:02
  but
• 13:02
  I'm
• 13:02
  like,
• 13:03
  well,
• 13:03
  I'm
• 13:04
  I
• 13:04
  try.
• 13:05
  Like,
• 13:05
  I'm
• 13:05
  so
• 13:06
  mu-
• 13:06
  I'm
• 13:06
  so
• 13:06
  much
• 13:06
  more
• 13:06
  aware
• 13:07
  now
• 13:07
  about
• 13:08
  that
• 13:08
  part
• 13:08
  of
• 13:08
  myself
• 13:09
  that
• 13:10
  I
• 13:10
  really
• 13:10
  try
• 13:11
  to
• 13:12
  deliver
• 13:12
  things
• 13:13
  a
• 13:13
  little
• 13:13
  more
• 13:14
  gently.
• 13:15
  Um,
• 13:17
  but
• 13:18
  yeah,
• 13:18
  I
• 13:18
  feel
• 13:18
  like
• 13:18
  you
• 13:18
  can't
• 13:19
  beat
• 13:19
  the
• 13:19
  truth,
• 13:19
  right?
• 13:21
  No.
• 13:22
  But
• 13:22
  I
• 13:22
  think
• 13:23
  there's
• 13:23
  like
• 13:24
  For
• 13:25
  me,
• 13:25
  it's
• 13:25
  very
• 13:25
  easy,
• 13:27
  the
• 13:27
  way
• 13:27
  this
• 13:28
  shows
• 13:28
  up
• 13:28
  the
• 13:28
  most
• 13:28
  for
• 13:28
  me
• 13:29
  is
• 13:29
  towards
• 13:30
  other
• 13:30
  people.
• 13:31
  Yeah.
• 13:31
  It's
• 13:31
  very
• 13:31
  easy
• 13:32
  for
• 13:32
  me
• 13:32
  to
• 13:32
  be
• 13:32
  compassionate
• 13:34
  towards
• 13:35
  other
• 13:35
  people,
• 13:36
  even
• 13:36
  if
• 13:36
  sometimes,
• 13:37
  like,
• 13:37
  that
• 13:37
  compassion
• 13:38
  means
• 13:39
  honesty,
• 13:40
  which
• 13:40
  can
• 13:40
  be
• 13:40
  hard
• 13:40
  and
• 13:40
  uncomfortable,
• 13:42
  but
• 13:42
  it's
• 13:43
  still
• 13:43
  very
• 13:43
  hard
• 13:43
  for
• 13:44
  me
• 13:44
  to
• 13:44
  do
• 13:44
  for
• 13:44
  myself,
• 13:46
  right?
• 13:46
  Like,
• 13:46
  even
• 13:47
  before
• 13:47
  when
• 13:47
  I
• 13:47
  was
• 13:47
  saying,
• 13:47
  like,
• 13:47
  I'm
• 13:48
  stressed
• 13:49
  because
• 13:49
  I'm
• 13:49
  busy,
• 13:50
  because
• 13:50
  I've
• 13:51
  taken
• 13:51
  on
• 13:51
  a
• 13:51
  lot.
• 13:53
  But
• 13:53
  even
• 13:53
  still,
• 13:54
  and
• 13:54
  I
• 13:54
  know
• 13:54
  you're
• 13:55
  gonna,
• 13:55
  like,
• 13:56
  I'm
• 13:56
  gonna
• 13:56
  get
• 13:57
  the
• 13:57
  eyes
• 13:57
  from
• 13:57
  you,
• 13:58
  Sloane,
• 13:58
  because
• 13:59
  we've
• 13:59
  talked
• 13:59
  about
• 13:59
  this
• 13:59
  many
• 14:00
  times.
• 14:00
  But
• 14:01
  I'll
• 14:01
  make
• 14:01
  a
• 14:01
  to-do
• 14:01
  list
• 14:01
  at
• 14:02
  the
• 14:02
  beginning
• 14:02
  of
• 14:02
  the
• 14:02
  day
• 14:02
  that's
• 14:03
  just
• 14:03
  wildly
• 14:03
  unrealistic,
• 14:04
  and
• 14:04
  then
• 14:05
  at
• 14:05
  the
• 14:05
  end
• 14:05
  of
• 14:05
  the
• 14:05
  day,
• 14:05
  when
• 14:06
  I
• 14:06
  haven't
• 14:06
  met
• 14:06
  my
• 14:06
  wildly
• 14:07
  unrealistic
• 14:07
  expectations,
• 14:08
  I'm
• 14:08
  like,
• 14:09
  "You're
• 14:09
  a
• 14:09
  piece
• 14:09
  of
• 14:09
  shit."
• 14:10
  And
• 14:12
  Yeah
• 14:12
  right?
• 14:13
  So
• 14:14
  I
• 14:15
  can't
• 14:15
  be
• 14:15
  compassi-
• 14:16
  I
• 14:16
  have
• 14:16
  a
• 14:16
  har-
• 14:16
  not
• 14:16
  that
• 14:17
  I
• 14:17
  can't.
• 14:17
  I
• 14:17
  have
• 14:17
  a
• 14:18
  harder
• 14:18
  time
• 14:18
  being
• 14:19
  compassionate
• 14:19
  with
• 14:19
  myself,
• 14:20
  giving
• 14:21
  myself
• 14:21
  grace,
• 14:22
  making
• 14:22
  sure
• 14:22
  I'm,
• 14:23
  you
• 14:23
  know,
• 14:24
  showing
• 14:24
  myself,
• 14:25
  like,
• 14:25
  love
• 14:26
  and
• 14:26
  kindness
• 14:26
  and
• 14:26
  taking
• 14:27
  care
• 14:27
  of
• 14:27
  me,
• 14:29
  uh,
• 14:29
  than
• 14:30
  I
• 14:30
  d-
• 14:30
  it's
• 14:30
  way
• 14:31
  easier
• 14:31
  for
• 14:31
  me
• 14:31
  to
• 14:32
  jump
• 14:33
  in
• 14:33
  and
• 14:34
  be
• 14:34
  compassionate
• 14:35
  with
• 14:35
  other
• 14:35
  people,
• 14:35
  or
• 14:36
  even,
• 14:36
  like,
• 14:36
  kind
• 14:36
  of
• 14:37
  defend
• 14:37
  other
• 14:37
  people
• 14:38
  or
• 14:38
  take
• 14:38
  a
• 14:38
  more
• 14:38
  compassionate
• 14:39
  approach.
• 14:40
  Hmm.
• 14:41
  I
• 14:41
  would
• 14:41
  agree
• 14:42
  with
• 14:42
  that.
• 14:42
  I,
• 14:42
  I
• 14:42
  definitely
• 14:44
  have
• 14:45
  a
• 14:45
  much
• 14:45
  harder
• 14:45
  time
• 14:46
  with
• 14:46
  compassion
• 14:46
  towards
• 14:47
  myself
• 14:47
  than
• 14:47
  others.
• 14:49
  Although
• 14:49
  I
• 14:49
  do
• 14:49
  struggle
• 14:50
  with
• 14:50
  others
• 14:50
  too,
• 14:50
  depending
• 14:51
  on
• 14:51
  the
• 14:51
  person.
• 14:53
  So
• 14:54
  it's
• 14:54
  really
• 14:54
  hard
• 14:54
  for
• 14:55
  me-
• 14:55
  Dang,
• 14:55
  what?
• 14:55
  even
• 14:56
  like-
• 14:58
  Mm.
• 14:59
  When
• 14:59
  just,
• 14:59
  when
• 14:59
  someone's
• 15:00
  just
• 15:00
  nasty.
• 15:02
  Mm.
• 15:02
  You
• 15:02
  know?
• 15:03
  When
• 15:03
  someone's
• 15:03
  just
• 15:03
  nasty
• 15:04
  and
• 15:04
  they're
• 15:04
  just,
• 15:05
  like,
• 15:05
  an
• 15:06
  awful
• 15:06
  person,
• 15:08
  I
• 15:08
  have
• 15:08
  a
• 15:08
  really
• 15:08
  hard
• 15:09
  time
• 15:10
  with
• 15:10
  being
• 15:11
  compassionate
• 15:11
  and
• 15:11
  just
• 15:13
  seeing
• 15:13
  that-
• 15:14
  where
• 15:14
  it
• 15:14
  might
• 15:14
  be
• 15:15
  coming
• 15:15
  from.
• 15:16
  I
• 15:16
  lo-
• 15:16
  I
• 15:17
  don't...
• 15:17
  I'm
• 15:17
  sorry.
• 15:17
  Yeah,
• 15:17
  'cause
• 15:17
  she
• 15:17
  lost
• 15:17
  her
• 15:18
  mind.
• 15:18
  But
• 15:18
  yeah,
• 15:19
  'cause
• 15:19
  she
• 15:19
  knows
• 15:19
  who
• 15:20
  I'm
• 15:20
  talking
• 15:20
  about.
• 15:21
  No,
• 15:21
  but
• 15:21
  you
• 15:21
  just
• 15:21
  said,
• 15:22
  you
• 15:22
  just
• 15:23
  said
• 15:23
  nasty,
• 15:24
  and
• 15:24
  the
• 15:24
  way
• 15:25
  that
• 15:25
  you
• 15:25
  said
• 15:25
  it,
• 15:25
  all
• 15:25
  I
• 15:26
  heard-
• 15:26
  Yes
• 15:26
  were
• 15:26
  my
• 15:26
  cousins
• 15:27
  from
• 15:27
  New
• 15:27
  York.
• 15:27
  Yeah.
• 15:27
  And
• 15:28
  I
• 15:28
  was
• 15:28
  like,
• 15:28
  "Oh,
• 15:28
  there's
• 15:29
  that
• 15:30
  coming
• 15:30
  out
• 15:30
  of..."
• 15:31
  Nasty.
• 15:33
  Yeah.
• 15:33
  Nasty.
• 15:33
  Nasty.
• 15:33
  Because
• 15:33
  there's
• 15:34
  no
• 15:34
  better
• 15:34
  word
• 15:34
  than
• 15:34
  they're
• 15:35
  just
• 15:35
  fucking
• 15:35
  nasty.
• 15:36
  And
• 15:36
  so
• 15:36
  it's
• 15:37
  really
• 15:37
  fucking
• 15:37
  hard
• 15:38
  to
• 15:38
  be
• 15:39
  compassionate
• 15:39
  and
• 15:39
  just,
• 15:40
  like-
• 15:41
  You
• 15:41
  know?
• 15:41
  I,
• 15:43
  I
• 15:43
  guess
• 15:43
  it's
• 15:43
  hard
• 15:44
  to
• 15:44
  be
• 15:44
  compassionate
• 15:45
  towards
• 15:45
  that
• 15:45
  person
• 15:46
  because
• 15:47
  most
• 15:47
  of
• 15:47
  the
• 15:47
  time
• 15:48
  they're
• 15:48
  being
• 15:48
  nasty
• 15:49
  towards
• 15:49
  someone
• 15:49
  else,
• 15:50
  so
• 15:50
  I'm
• 15:50
  feeling
• 15:50
  more
• 15:50
  compassionate
• 15:51
  about
• 15:52
  the
• 15:52
  person
• 15:52
  on
• 15:52
  their
• 15:53
  re-
• 15:53
  the
• 15:53
  receiving
• 15:54
  end
• 15:54
  of
• 15:54
  their
• 15:55
  nastiness-
• 15:56
  Mm-hmm
• 15:56
  than
• 15:56
  them.
• 15:57
  So
• 15:58
  I
• 15:58
  guess
• 15:58
  that's
• 15:59
  where
• 15:59
  I
• 15:59
  feel
• 16:00
  like
• 16:00
  I
• 16:00
  struggle,
• 16:00
  outside
• 16:01
  of
• 16:01
  myself,
• 16:03
  where
• 16:03
  I
• 16:03
  struggle
• 16:04
  with,
• 16:05
  um,
• 16:05
  having
• 16:06
  compassion
• 16:07
  for
• 16:07
  others.
• 16:09
  Well,
• 16:09
  and
• 16:09
  my
• 16:09
  logical
• 16:10
  brain
• 16:10
  knows
• 16:12
  I
• 16:12
  actually
• 16:13
  probably
• 16:13
  should
• 16:13
  be
• 16:13
  compassionate
• 16:14
  towards
• 16:14
  that
• 16:15
  person
• 16:15
  because
• 16:15
  there's
• 16:15
  some
• 16:16
  sort
• 16:16
  of,
• 16:16
  like,
• 16:16
  wound
• 16:17
  or
• 16:17
  trauma
• 16:18
  or
• 16:18
  something-
• 16:19
  Right
• 16:20
  that
• 16:20
  has
• 16:20
  resulted
• 16:20
  in
• 16:20
  that
• 16:21
  type
• 16:21
  of
• 16:21
  behavior.
• 16:22
  Or
• 16:23
  even
• 16:23
  a
• 16:23
  purpose.
• 16:24
  Yeah.
• 16:26
  But
• 16:26
  I'm,
• 16:27
  but
• 16:27
  I
• 16:27
  still,
• 16:28
  like,
• 16:28
  my,
• 16:30
  my
• 16:30
  logical
• 16:31
  brain
• 16:31
  and
• 16:32
  my
• 16:32
  empathetic
• 16:32
  heart
• 16:33
  have
• 16:33
  a
• 16:33
  hard
• 16:34
  time-
• 16:35
  Yeah
• 16:36
  connecting
• 16:36
  Reconciling
• 16:36
  that,
• 16:37
  right,
• 16:38
  exactly.
• 16:39
  It
• 16:39
  just,
• 16:39
  yeah,
• 16:40
  it
• 16:40
  just
• 16:40
  doesn't
• 16:41
  jive.
• 16:41
  Just
• 16:42
  doesn't
• 16:42
  go.
• 16:43
  Right.
• 16:43
  Doesn't
• 16:43
  go
• 16:44
  together.
• 16:44
  Yeah.
• 16:46
  Excellent,
• 16:46
  so
• 16:46
  thinking
• 16:47
  face
• 16:47
  on.
• 16:48
  Mm-hmm.
• 16:48
  I
• 16:48
  know.
• 16:49
  So
• 16:49
  I'm
• 16:49
  like-
• 16:49
  Yeah
• 16:49
  uh,
• 16:50
  I
• 16:50
  have
• 16:50
  two
• 16:50
  things.
• 16:52
  Um
• 16:53
  To,
• 16:54
  just
• 16:54
  to
• 16:55
  add
• 16:55
  on
• 16:56
  to
• 16:56
  what
• 16:56
  you
• 16:56
  were
• 16:56
  saying,
• 16:57
  Adriana,
• 16:57
  like
• 16:58
  two
• 16:58
  things
• 16:59
  came
• 17:00
  up
• 17:00
  for
• 17:00
  me
• 17:00
  when
• 17:00
  you
• 17:00
  were
• 17:01
  saying
• 17:01
  that.
• 17:01
  Yeah,
• 17:01
  like
• 17:02
  history,
• 17:03
  I
• 17:03
  think,
• 17:04
  plays
• 17:05
  a
• 17:05
  role.
• 17:05
  Um,
• 17:06
  like
• 17:06
  it's
• 17:07
  hard
• 17:07
  to
• 17:07
  let
• 17:07
  go
• 17:08
  of
• 17:08
  past
• 17:09
  things.
• 17:09
  Mm.
• 17:11
  And
• 17:11
  just
• 17:11
  be
• 17:12
  in
• 17:12
  the
• 17:12
  present-
• 17:12
  Yes
• 17:13
  thing.
• 17:14
  Um,
• 17:15
  it's
• 17:16
  like
• 17:17
  we're
• 17:17
  really
• 17:17
  good
• 17:18
  at
• 17:18
  dragging
• 17:18
  all
• 17:19
  of...
• 17:20
  Or
• 17:20
  rather
• 17:20
  I
• 17:21
  am.
• 17:21
  I
• 17:21
  have
• 17:21
  an
• 17:21
  excellent
• 17:22
  memory.
• 17:24
  I'm
• 17:24
  with
• 17:24
  you.
• 17:24
  And
• 17:24
  I
• 17:24
  would
• 17:24
  be
• 17:25
  like,
• 17:25
  "I
• 17:25
  see
• 17:25
  you
• 17:25
  doing
• 17:26
  this
• 17:26
  thing.
• 17:26
  You've
• 17:26
  done
• 17:27
  it
• 17:27
  this
• 17:27
  time,
• 17:27
  this
• 17:27
  time,
• 17:27
  this
• 17:28
  time."
• 17:28
  That,
• 17:28
  and
• 17:28
  like
• 17:28
  naming
• 17:29
  dates,
• 17:30
  talking
• 17:30
  conversations,
• 17:31
  like
• 17:31
  I
• 17:31
  can
• 17:31
  replay
• 17:32
  the
• 17:32
  entire
• 17:33
  fucking
• 17:33
  conversation.
• 17:33
  Do
• 17:33
  you
• 17:33
  need
• 17:33
  me
• 17:33
  to
• 17:34
  show
• 17:34
  you
• 17:34
  all
• 17:34
  the
• 17:34
  receipts?
• 17:36
  'Cause
• 17:36
  I
• 17:36
  have
• 17:36
  them.
• 17:37
  Well
• 17:37
  documented.
• 17:38
  Boom.
• 17:39
  In
• 17:39
  a
• 17:39
  spreadsheet.
• 17:40
  There
• 17:40
  they
• 17:40
  are.
• 17:40
  Right.
• 17:40
  On
• 17:41
  this
• 17:41
  date,
• 17:41
  at
• 17:41
  this
• 17:42
  time,
• 17:42
  you
• 17:42
  said
• 17:42
  this,
• 17:42
  and
• 17:43
  I
• 17:43
  said
• 17:43
  that,
• 17:43
  and
• 17:43
  you
• 17:43
  said
• 17:44
  this,
• 17:44
  and
• 17:44
  I
• 17:44
  said
• 17:44
  that.
• 17:45
  Any
• 17:45
  of
• 17:45
  this
• 17:45
  ringing
• 17:46
  a
• 17:46
  bell?
• 17:47
  Like
• 17:48
  literally
• 17:49
  word
• 17:49
  for
• 17:49
  word.
• 17:49
  And
• 17:49
  you
• 17:49
  remember
• 17:49
  everything
• 17:50
  word
• 17:50
  for
• 17:50
  word,
• 17:50
  right.
• 17:51
  Entire
• 17:51
  conversations.
• 17:52
  Yes.
• 17:53
  Like...
• 17:53
  Oh
• 17:53
  my
• 17:53
  God,
• 17:53
  yes.
• 17:54
  Me
• 17:54
  too.
• 17:55
  Yes.
• 17:55
  So
• 17:55
  that
• 17:55
  is
• 17:56
  a,
• 17:56
  a
• 17:56
  struggle.
• 17:58
  Yes.
• 17:58
  But
• 17:58
  I
• 17:58
  think
• 17:59
  even
• 17:59
  more
• 17:59
  directly
• 18:00
  to
• 18:00
  what
• 18:00
  you
• 18:00
  were
• 18:00
  saying
• 18:01
  is
• 18:01
  when
• 18:01
  I
• 18:02
  am
• 18:02
  sitting
• 18:02
  in
• 18:02
  judgment,
• 18:04
  right?
• 18:04
  Mm-hmm.
• 18:04
  Like,
• 18:06
  "I
• 18:06
  would
• 18:06
  never
• 18:06
  do
• 18:07
  that."
• 18:08
  Mm.
• 18:08
  "That
• 18:08
  person
• 18:09
  is
• 18:09
  bad."
• 18:10
  Right.
• 18:11
  That's...
• 18:13
  And
• 18:15
  Hopefully
• 18:15
  more
• 18:16
  often
• 18:16
  now.
• 18:17
  That
• 18:18
  was
• 18:18
  a
• 18:18
  struggle
• 18:18
  to
• 18:18
  say.
• 18:20
  I
• 18:20
  am
• 18:21
  a
• 18:21
  little
• 18:21
  bit
• 18:21
  more
• 18:21
  aware
• 18:22
  of
• 18:23
  when
• 18:23
  I'm
• 18:23
  doing
• 18:23
  that.
• 18:24
  Um,
• 18:26
  mostly
• 18:26
  depends
• 18:27
  on
• 18:27
  my
• 18:27
  mood
• 18:27
  of
• 18:27
  the
• 18:27
  day.
• 18:28
  Um-
• 18:29
  Or
• 18:30
  whether
• 18:30
  or
• 18:30
  not
• 18:30
  I'm
• 18:30
  hungry-
• 18:31
  Exactly
• 18:31
  or
• 18:32
  have
• 18:32
  slept
• 18:32
  well.
• 18:33
  How
• 18:33
  tired
• 18:33
  I
• 18:33
  am.
• 18:34
  Like,
• 18:34
  that's-
• 18:34
  Exactly.
• 18:35
  Yeah.
• 18:35
  Depending
• 18:35
  on-
• 18:35
  My
• 18:35
  c-
• 18:36
  my
• 18:36
  ability
• 18:37
  to
• 18:37
  be
• 18:37
  compassionate
• 18:38
  is
• 18:38
  directly
• 18:39
  correlated
• 18:39
  to
• 18:40
  how
• 18:40
  hungry-
• 18:41
  Exactly
• 18:41
  tired,
• 18:41
  thirsty-
• 18:42
  Yeah
• 18:42
  and
• 18:42
  stressed
• 18:43
  I
• 18:43
  am.
• 18:43
  Yeah.
• 18:43
  I
• 18:43
  would
• 18:44
  say
• 18:44
  that's
• 18:44
  true
• 18:44
  for
• 18:44
  anybody,
• 18:46
  right?
• 18:46
  Exactly,
• 18:46
  but
• 18:46
  that's
• 18:47
  the
• 18:47
  point.
• 18:47
  Exactly.
• 18:48
  Yeah.
• 18:49
  Right?
• 18:49
  Like,
• 18:49
  because
• 18:50
  that
• 18:50
  other
• 18:50
  person,
• 18:52
  they're
• 18:52
  dealing
• 18:52
  with
• 18:53
  all
• 18:53
  of
• 18:53
  that
• 18:53
  shit,
• 18:53
  too.
• 18:54
  Yeah.
• 18:54
  Right?
• 18:55
  Like,
• 18:55
  so
• 18:56
  who
• 18:56
  am
• 18:56
  I
• 18:56
  to
• 18:56
  say
• 18:57
  I
• 18:57
  wouldn't
• 18:58
  do
• 18:58
  that?
• 18:58
  Hmm.
• 18:59
  I
• 18:59
  don't
• 18:59
  know
• 18:59
  that.
• 19:00
  Right.
• 19:01
  I
• 19:01
  don't
• 19:02
  know
• 19:02
  that
• 19:02
  I
• 19:02
  wouldn't
• 19:02
  do
• 19:02
  that.
• 19:03
  Having
• 19:05
  the
• 19:05
  day,
• 19:05
  the
• 19:05
  life,
• 19:06
  the
• 19:06
  thing
• 19:06
  that
• 19:07
  they're
• 19:07
  going
• 19:07
  through
• 19:07
  right
• 19:08
  now-
• 19:08
  Right
• 19:08
  how
• 19:09
  would
• 19:09
  I
• 19:09
  react?
• 19:09
  Because
• 19:10
  I
• 19:10
  don't
• 19:10
  know
• 19:10
  what
• 19:10
  the
• 19:10
  fuck
• 19:11
  they're
• 19:11
  going
• 19:11
  through.
• 19:12
  So
• 19:13
  it's,
• 19:14
  it's...
• 19:15
  I
• 19:15
  will
• 19:15
  say
• 19:16
  I'm
• 19:16
  better
• 19:16
  at
• 19:16
  noticing
• 19:17
  it
• 19:17
  now.
• 19:18
  Does
• 19:18
  that
• 19:18
  remove
• 19:20
  me
• 19:20
  being
• 19:21
  judgmental
• 19:21
  of
• 19:22
  people?
• 19:22
  No,
• 19:24
  especially
• 19:24
  when
• 19:25
  it
• 19:25
  comes
• 19:25
  to
• 19:25
  work.
• 19:26
  Like,
• 19:26
  this-
• 19:26
  Yeah
• 19:26
  is
• 19:26
  probably
• 19:27
  where
• 19:27
  I
• 19:27
  struggle
• 19:27
  with
• 19:28
  it
• 19:28
  the
• 19:28
  hardest
• 19:29
  because
• 19:30
  I
• 19:32
  work
• 19:33
  really
• 19:33
  hard.
• 19:34
  Like,
• 19:35
  I
• 19:36
  am
• 19:36
  constantly
• 19:37
  learning
• 19:37
  and
• 19:38
  trying
• 19:38
  and
• 19:38
  putting
• 19:39
  in
• 19:39
  effort,
• 19:40
  and
• 19:41
  you
• 19:41
  know,
• 19:41
  like,
• 19:42
  I
• 19:42
  do
• 19:42
  not
• 19:43
  expect
• 19:44
  perfection
• 19:45
  for
• 19:45
  myself,
• 19:46
  so
• 19:46
  I,
• 19:46
  I'm
• 19:46
  not
• 19:47
  gonna
• 19:47
  say
• 19:47
  that's
• 19:48
  where
• 19:48
  it
• 19:48
  comes
• 19:48
  from,
• 19:48
  but
• 19:48
  I
• 19:49
  wanna
• 19:49
  know
• 19:49
  I
• 19:49
  gave
• 19:49
  my
• 19:49
  best.
• 19:50
  Mm.
• 19:51
  Right?
• 19:52
  Like,
• 19:53
  and
• 19:54
  when
• 19:55
  other
• 19:55
  people
• 19:55
  just,
• 19:56
  like,
• 19:56
  fucking
• 19:56
  half-ass
• 19:57
  shit
• 19:57
  and
• 19:58
  fuck
• 19:58
  off
• 19:58
  and,
• 19:59
  like...
• 20:00
  That
• 20:00
  doesn't
• 20:00
  matter
• 20:00
  to
• 20:01
  me.
• 20:01
  It's
• 20:01
  like,
• 20:03
  ugh,
• 20:03
  it's
• 20:04
  so
• 20:04
  insulting.
• 20:05
  I,
• 20:05
  I
• 20:06
  take
• 20:06
  it
• 20:06
  personally,
• 20:07
  right?
• 20:08
  So
• 20:09
  it's
• 20:09
  easy
• 20:09
  for
• 20:09
  me
• 20:09
  to
• 20:10
  sit
• 20:10
  in
• 20:10
  judgment-
• 20:12
  Yeah
• 20:12
  and
• 20:12
  not
• 20:12
  compassion
• 20:13
  in
• 20:13
  those
• 20:13
  situations
• 20:15
  where
• 20:15
  if
• 20:16
  I
• 20:16
  catch
• 20:16
  myself
• 20:16
  and
• 20:16
  take
• 20:17
  a
• 20:17
  step
• 20:17
  back
• 20:17
  and
• 20:17
  go,
• 20:19
  especially
• 20:20
  when
• 20:20
  there's
• 20:20
  history
• 20:21
  involved,
• 20:23
  if
• 20:23
  this
• 20:24
  person
• 20:24
  did
• 20:24
  this,
• 20:25
  like,
• 20:26
  let's
• 20:26
  say-
• 20:27
  Judy,
• 20:29
  right?
• 20:30
  I
• 20:30
  have
• 20:30
  a
• 20:30
  history
• 20:30
  with
• 20:31
  Judy,
• 20:31
  and
• 20:33
  oh,
• 20:34
  they're
• 20:34
  doing
• 20:34
  that
• 20:34
  thing
• 20:35
  again.
• 20:36
  Um-
• 20:37
  Is
• 20:37
  Judy
• 20:37
  being
• 20:38
  Judy?
• 20:39
  Do
• 20:39
  you
• 20:39
  make
• 20:40
  it
• 20:40
  a
• 20:40
  verb?
• 20:41
  You
• 20:41
  pulled
• 20:41
  a
• 20:41
  Judy.
• 20:42
  You're
• 20:42
  do-
• 20:43
  I
• 20:43
  do
• 20:44
  not
• 20:44
  you're
• 20:44
  doing
• 20:44
  a
• 20:44
  Judy.
• 20:45
  I
• 20:46
  only
• 20:46
  do
• 20:46
  that
• 20:46
  with
• 20:46
  one
• 20:46
  person.
• 20:47
  And
• 20:47
  that's
• 20:48
  just
• 20:48
  because
• 20:48
  they
• 20:48
  can't
• 20:48
  spell
• 20:49
  for
• 20:49
  shit.
• 20:50
  But,
• 20:50
  um,
• 20:51
  and
• 20:51
  it's
• 20:52
  fucking
• 20:52
  hysterical
• 20:54
  But,
• 20:54
  um
• 20:56
  When
• 20:56
  I,
• 20:56
  when
• 20:56
  I'm
• 20:57
  in
• 20:57
  a
• 20:57
  good
• 20:57
  place
• 20:59
  and
• 20:59
  able
• 20:59
  to,
• 21:00
  like,
• 21:00
  notice
• 21:01
  what
• 21:01
  I'm
• 21:01
  doing,
• 21:02
  I
• 21:02
  can
• 21:03
  be
• 21:03
  like,
• 21:03
  "Well,
• 21:04
  let's
• 21:05
  change
• 21:05
  the
• 21:05
  characters.
• 21:06
  Let's
• 21:07
  say
• 21:09
  John
• 21:09
  Smith
• 21:10
  did
• 21:10
  the
• 21:10
  same
• 21:10
  thing."
• 21:11
  John
• 21:11
  and
• 21:11
  I
• 21:11
  have
• 21:11
  a
• 21:11
  great
• 21:12
  relationship.
• 21:13
  I
• 21:13
  know
• 21:13
  that
• 21:13
  they
• 21:14
  are
• 21:14
  awesome,
• 21:14
  and
• 21:15
  they
• 21:15
  got
• 21:15
  other
• 21:16
  way
• 21:16
  to
• 21:16
  do
• 21:16
  things
• 21:16
  for
• 21:17
  people
• 21:17
  and
• 21:17
  whatever.
• 21:18
  You
• 21:18
  know,
• 21:18
  like,
• 21:20
  if
• 21:20
  John
• 21:20
  Smith
• 21:21
  did
• 21:21
  that
• 21:21
  same
• 21:22
  thing,
• 21:23
  would
• 21:23
  I
• 21:24
  still
• 21:24
  feel
• 21:24
  this
• 21:24
  way?
• 21:26
  And
• 21:26
  nine
• 21:26
  times
• 21:26
  out
• 21:27
  of
• 21:27
  10,
• 21:27
  the
• 21:27
  answer
• 21:28
  is
• 21:28
  no.
• 21:28
  Hmm.
• 21:29
  Hmm.
• 21:29
  That's
• 21:30
  a
• 21:30
  really
• 21:31
  interesting
• 21:31
  reframe.
• 21:31
  I
• 21:31
  love
• 21:32
  that.
• 21:33
  Do
• 21:33
  you
• 21:33
  have
• 21:33
  that?
• 21:34
  And
• 21:34
  that's
• 21:35
  just
• 21:35
  ta-
• 21:35
  trying
• 21:36
  to
• 21:36
  take
• 21:36
  my
• 21:36
  bias
• 21:37
  out
• 21:37
  of
• 21:37
  it,
• 21:37
  really.
• 21:38
  Yeah
• 21:38
  Recognizing
• 21:38
  my
• 21:39
  bias
• 21:39
  towards
• 21:39
  that
• 21:40
  person
• 21:40
  based
• 21:41
  on
• 21:41
  other
• 21:41
  things
• 21:42
  that
• 21:42
  aren't-
• 21:42
  Yeah
• 21:42
  about
• 21:43
  this
• 21:43
  current
• 21:43
  situation.
• 21:44
  Yeah.
• 21:45
  Maybe
• 21:45
  they're
• 21:46
  somewhat
• 21:46
  related,
• 21:47
  but
• 21:47
  it's
• 21:47
  not
• 21:47
  directly
• 21:48
  related
• 21:48
  to
• 21:48
  the
• 21:48
  current
• 21:49
  situation.
• 21:50
  So,
• 21:50
  um,
• 21:51
  and
• 21:51
  that
• 21:53
  kind
• 21:53
  of,
• 21:53
  I
• 21:55
  think
• 21:55
  maybe,
• 21:55
  like,
• 21:56
  opens
• 21:56
  the
• 21:56
  door
• 21:57
  to
• 21:57
  compassion
• 21:58
  for
• 21:58
  me,
• 21:58
  where
• 21:58
  I
• 21:58
  can
• 21:58
  be
• 21:59
  like-
• 21:59
  Mm
• 22:00
  A,
• 22:00
  be
• 22:00
  compassionate
• 22:01
  with
• 22:01
  myself.
• 22:02
  I'm
• 22:02
  bringing
• 22:02
  other
• 22:03
  shit
• 22:03
  into
• 22:03
  this
• 22:04
  that
• 22:04
  shouldn't
• 22:04
  be
• 22:04
  there.
• 22:05
  And
• 22:05
  then
• 22:05
  B,
• 22:07
  I'm
• 22:07
  projecting
• 22:08
  a
• 22:08
  bunch
• 22:09
  of
• 22:09
  crap
• 22:09
  onto
• 22:09
  this
• 22:10
  person-
• 22:10
  Right
• 22:11
  and
• 22:11
  they
• 22:11
  don't
• 22:12
  know
• 22:12
  that.
• 22:12
  So,
• 22:13
  right.
• 22:15
  Yeah.
• 22:16
  That's
• 22:16
  my
• 22:16
  struggle.
• 22:18
  No,
• 22:18
  I,
• 22:18
  I
• 22:18
  like
• 22:19
  that
• 22:19
  'cause
• 22:20
  I'm
• 22:20
  li-
• 22:20
  I'm
• 22:20
  glad
• 22:21
  that
• 22:21
  you
• 22:21
  brought
• 22:21
  up
• 22:21
  the
• 22:21
  judgment
• 22:22
  because,
• 22:22
  I
• 22:22
  mean,
• 22:22
  that
• 22:23
  is
• 22:23
  the
• 22:23
  huge
• 22:23
  piece
• 22:23
  of
• 22:23
  it,
• 22:24
  right?
• 22:24
  It's
• 22:24
  'cause
• 22:24
  you,
• 22:25
  you
• 22:25
  are-
• 22:25
  The
• 22:25
  other
• 22:25
  side
• 22:25
  of
• 22:26
  compassion
• 22:26
  in,
• 22:26
  in
• 22:26
  judgment.
• 22:27
  Right.
• 22:28
  You
• 22:28
  know,
• 22:28
  whenever
• 22:29
  you...
• 22:29
  I
• 22:29
  mean,
• 22:29
  how
• 22:29
  many
• 22:30
  times
• 22:30
  you
• 22:30
  hear
• 22:31
  so
• 22:31
  many
• 22:31
  things,
• 22:31
  like
• 22:31
  when
• 22:31
  someone
• 22:32
  cuts
• 22:32
  you
• 22:32
  off
• 22:33
  or
• 22:33
  whatever,
• 22:33
  you
• 22:33
  just
• 22:33
  don't
• 22:33
  know
• 22:34
  what
• 22:34
  people
• 22:34
  are
• 22:34
  going
• 22:34
  through,
• 22:35
  and
• 22:36
  we
• 22:37
  shouldn't
• 22:37
  take
• 22:37
  it
• 22:37
  personal.
• 22:38
  But
• 22:39
  again-
• 22:40
  Mm
• 22:40
  I
• 22:40
  will
• 22:40
  say
• 22:40
  when
• 22:41
  someone's
• 22:41
  being
• 22:41
  nasty,
• 22:41
  it's
• 22:42
  hard
• 22:42
  for
• 22:42
  me
• 22:42
  not
• 22:42
  to
• 22:43
  get-
• 22:43
  I
• 22:43
  get
• 22:43
  it
• 22:44
  pissed
• 22:44
  off.
• 22:44
  But-
• 22:45
  Yeah
• 22:45
  yeah.
• 22:46
  Um,
• 22:47
  so
• 22:47
  I,
• 22:47
  yeah,
• 22:48
  that's,
• 22:48
  that's,
• 22:48
  that's
• 22:49
  where
• 22:49
  I
• 22:49
  struggle
• 22:49
  with
• 22:49
  it
• 22:50
  too
• 22:50
  in
• 22:50
  that,
• 22:50
  in
• 22:51
  that
• 22:51
  sense,
• 22:51
  because
• 22:53
  I
• 22:53
  think
• 22:53
  that
• 22:53
  is
• 22:54
  just,
• 22:54
  like,
• 22:54
  that
• 22:54
  I'm
• 22:54
  so
• 22:55
  empathetic
• 22:56
  that
• 22:56
  I
• 22:56
  don't
• 22:56
  like
• 22:57
  to
• 22:57
  see
• 22:59
  what
• 22:59
  one
• 22:59
  person's
• 22:59
  doing
• 22:59
  to
• 23:00
  someone
• 23:00
  else.
• 23:01
  Um...
• 23:03
  Well,
• 23:03
  here's
• 23:03
  an
• 23:04
  interesting
• 23:04
  reframe.
• 23:05
  Yeah.
• 23:05
  Let's
• 23:05
  say
• 23:06
  that
• 23:06
  you
• 23:06
  are
• 23:07
  the
• 23:07
  abuser
• 23:07
  in
• 23:08
  this
• 23:08
  situation,
• 23:09
  whoever
• 23:09
  it
• 23:09
  is
• 23:09
  being
• 23:10
  an
• 23:10
  asshole.
• 23:11
  How
• 23:11
  would
• 23:12
  you
• 23:12
  feel
• 23:13
  later
• 23:13
  reflecting
• 23:14
  back
• 23:14
  on
• 23:14
  that
• 23:14
  interaction?
• 23:16
  If
• 23:17
  I
• 23:17
  was
• 23:17
  the
• 23:17
  abuser.
• 23:17
  And
• 23:17
  your
• 23:17
  role
• 23:17
  in
• 23:17
  it
• 23:18
  If
• 23:19
  you
• 23:19
  were
• 23:19
  the
• 23:19
  bad
• 23:19
  guy.
• 23:20
  I'm
• 23:20
  sorry,
• 23:20
  go
• 23:20
  ahead.
• 23:21
  If
• 23:21
  I
• 23:21
  was,
• 23:21
  if
• 23:21
  I
• 23:21
  was
• 23:21
  the
• 23:21
  bad
• 23:22
  guy?
• 23:22
  Mm-hmm.
• 23:23
  Oh,
• 23:23
  I
• 23:23
  mean,
• 23:23
  well,
• 23:25
  I
• 23:25
  mean,
• 23:25
  I
• 23:25
  can
• 23:25
  think
• 23:25
  of
• 23:26
  just
• 23:26
  instances
• 23:27
  of
• 23:27
  where
• 23:27
  I
• 23:28
  would
• 23:29
  maybe
• 23:29
  not
• 23:29
  the
• 23:29
  nasty
• 23:29
  person
• 23:30
  I
• 23:30
  was
• 23:30
  thinking
• 23:30
  of
• 23:31
  earlier,
• 23:31
  'cause
• 23:31
  that
• 23:31
  would
• 23:31
  never
• 23:32
  be
• 23:32
  me,
• 23:33
  but,
• 23:33
  but
• 23:34
  definitely
• 23:34
  being,
• 23:35
  like,
• 23:35
  um,
• 23:37
  unkind,
• 23:37
  have
• 23:37
  a
• 23:38
  moment
• 23:38
  of
• 23:38
  like-
• 23:38
  The
• 23:38
  wrong
• 23:39
  side
• 23:39
  of
• 23:39
  it,
• 23:39
  yeah
• 23:40
  yeah,
• 23:40
  'cause
• 23:40
  I've
• 23:40
  done
• 23:41
  it.
• 23:41
  I
• 23:41
  know
• 23:41
  I
• 23:41
  did
• 23:41
  it,
• 23:41
  I
• 23:41
  did
• 23:42
  it
• 23:42
  recently,
• 23:43
  and
• 23:43
  honestly,
• 23:44
  I
• 23:44
  don't
• 23:44
  even
• 23:44
  remember
• 23:44
  what
• 23:45
  it
• 23:45
  was,
• 23:45
  and
• 23:45
  I
• 23:45
  think
• 23:45
  the
• 23:45
  fact
• 23:46
  that
• 23:46
  I
• 23:46
  don't
• 23:46
  remember
• 23:46
  what
• 23:47
  it
• 23:47
  was
• 23:47
  is
• 23:47
  good
• 23:48
  because-
• 23:50
  I
• 23:50
  used
• 23:50
  to,
• 23:51
  when
• 23:51
  I
• 23:51
  used,
• 23:51
  I
• 23:51
  mean,
• 23:51
  I
• 23:51
  used
• 23:52
  to
• 23:52
  have
• 23:52
  a
• 23:52
  fucking
• 23:52
  chip
• 23:52
  on
• 23:53
  my
• 23:53
  shoulder
• 23:53
  when
• 23:53
  I
• 23:53
  was
• 23:53
  younger,
• 23:54
  and
• 23:54
  so
• 23:54
  I
• 23:54
  would
• 23:55
  really,
• 23:55
  like,
• 23:56
  things
• 23:57
  would
• 23:57
  just
• 23:57
  trigger
• 23:58
  me,
• 23:58
  and
• 23:58
  I
• 23:58
  would,
• 23:58
  I
• 23:59
  didn't
• 23:59
  care,
• 23:59
  you
• 23:59
  know?
• 24:00
  I
• 24:00
  would
• 24:00
  just
• 24:00
  fucking
• 24:01
  blurt
• 24:01
  shit
• 24:01
  out
• 24:01
  and
• 24:01
  whatever
• 24:02
  and
• 24:02
  not
• 24:02
  be
• 24:02
  so
• 24:03
  nice.
• 24:04
  Um,
• 24:06
  but
• 24:06
  I
• 24:06
  would
• 24:06
  feel
• 24:06
  like
• 24:07
  shit
• 24:07
  afterwards.
• 24:09
  I
• 24:09
  would
• 24:09
  feel
• 24:10
  awful
• 24:11
  afterwards.
• 24:12
  And,
• 24:13
  um,
• 24:13
  you
• 24:13
  know,
• 24:13
  with
• 24:14
  the
• 24:14
  instance
• 24:14
  that
• 24:14
  happened
• 24:15
  recently,
• 24:15
  which
• 24:15
  again,
• 24:16
  I,
• 24:17
  I
• 24:17
  know
• 24:17
  it
• 24:17
  happened
• 24:17
  in,
• 24:18
  in,
• 24:18
  like,
• 24:19
  a
• 24:19
  supermarket
• 24:19
  or
• 24:19
  something,
• 24:20
  and
• 24:20
  I
• 24:20
  don't
• 24:20
  even
• 24:20
  remember
• 24:21
  what
• 24:22
  the
• 24:22
  interaction
• 24:22
  was.
• 24:23
  I
• 24:23
  just
• 24:24
  remember
• 24:24
  afterwards,
• 24:25
  and
• 24:25
  I
• 24:25
  was
• 24:25
  like,
• 24:25
  "Oh,
• 24:25
  that
• 24:25
  was
• 24:26
  not
• 24:26
  kind,"
• 24:28
  you
• 24:28
  know?
• 24:29
  But
• 24:30
  then
• 24:30
  I
• 24:30
  said
• 24:30
  to
• 24:30
  myself,
• 24:31
  like,
• 24:31
  "Okay,
• 24:33
  you
• 24:33
  were
• 24:33
  not
• 24:33
  kind,
• 24:35
  but
• 24:36
  let's
• 24:36
  not
• 24:36
  beat
• 24:37
  ourselves
• 24:37
  up
• 24:37
  about
• 24:38
  it,"
• 24:39
  because
• 24:39
  that
• 24:40
  would
• 24:40
  be
• 24:40
  my
• 24:40
  next
• 24:41
  go-to,
• 24:41
  would
• 24:41
  be
• 24:42
  like
• 24:42
  I
• 24:42
  would
• 24:42
  replay
• 24:43
  that
• 24:43
  in
• 24:43
  my
• 24:43
  head
• 24:44
  over
• 24:44
  and
• 24:44
  over
• 24:45
  again
• 24:45
  and
• 24:46
  be
• 24:46
  so
• 24:47
  mean
• 24:47
  to
• 24:47
  myself.
• 24:48
  Then
• 24:48
  I
• 24:48
  would
• 24:48
  turn
• 24:48
  it
• 24:49
  on
• 24:49
  me
• 24:50
  for
• 24:50
  having
• 24:51
  h-
• 24:51
  had
• 24:51
  a
• 24:51
  moment
• 24:52
  of
• 24:52
  weakness
• 24:53
  and
• 24:53
  being
• 24:53
  unkind.
• 24:54
  And,
• 24:54
  um,
• 24:56
  and
• 24:56
  I
• 24:56
  was
• 24:56
  like,
• 24:56
  no,
• 24:56
  I'm
• 24:57
  gonna
• 24:57
  have
• 24:57
  compassion
• 24:57
  for
• 24:57
  myself,
• 24:58
  like,
• 24:59
  okay,
• 24:59
  you
• 24:59
  messed
• 24:59
  up.
• 25:00
  You
• 25:00
  realized
• 25:00
  you
• 25:00
  did
• 25:00
  something
• 25:01
  unkind.
• 25:01
  We'll
• 25:01
  try
• 25:01
  better
• 25:03
  next
• 25:03
  time,
• 25:03
  right?
• 25:05
  And
• 25:05
  I
• 25:05
  think
• 25:05
  that's
• 25:05
  why
• 25:05
  I
• 25:05
  don't
• 25:06
  remember,
• 25:06
  is
• 25:06
  because
• 25:07
  I
• 25:07
  actually,
• 25:07
  like,
• 25:07
  had
• 25:08
  compassion
• 25:08
  with
• 25:08
  myself,
• 25:09
  and-
• 25:09
  Protective
• 25:10
  mechanism
• 25:10
  to
• 25:11
  like-
• 25:11
  Yeah,
• 25:12
  yeah
• 25:12
  I
• 25:12
  feel
• 25:12
  like
• 25:12
  my,
• 25:13
  I
• 25:13
  feel
• 25:13
  like
• 25:13
  my
• 25:13
  body
• 25:14
  and
• 25:14
  brain
• 25:14
  would
• 25:14
  be
• 25:14
  like,
• 25:15
  "Let's
• 25:15
  just..."
• 25:17
  Yeah.
• 25:17
  Well,
• 25:18
  no,
• 25:18
  because
• 25:18
  normally
• 25:19
  when
• 25:19
  I
• 25:19
  do
• 25:19
  stuff
• 25:19
  like
• 25:19
  that,
• 25:19
  I
• 25:19
  would
• 25:20
  just
• 25:20
  ruminate
• 25:20
  over
• 25:21
  it.
• 25:22
  Oh,
• 25:22
  that's
• 25:22
  true.
• 25:22
  And
• 25:22
  I
• 25:22
  would
• 25:22
  just
• 25:22
  keep
• 25:22
  beating
• 25:22
  myself
• 25:22
  up
• 25:22
  over
• 25:23
  the
• 25:23
  fact
• 25:23
  that
• 25:23
  I
• 25:24
  said
• 25:24
  that
• 25:24
  thing
• 25:25
  and,
• 25:25
  like,
• 25:26
  how
• 25:26
  awful
• 25:27
  I
• 25:27
  feel
• 25:27
  for
• 25:28
  saying
• 25:28
  that
• 25:28
  thing.
• 25:30
  So
• 25:30
  I
• 25:30
  would
• 25:30
  ruminate
• 25:30
  over
• 25:31
  that.
• 25:31
  And
• 25:31
  then
• 25:31
  it
• 25:31
  almost
• 25:31
  becomes
• 25:31
  part
• 25:31
  of
• 25:31
  the
• 25:31
  pattern,
• 25:32
  like-
• 25:32
  Mm
• 25:33
  well,
• 25:33
  that's
• 25:33
  how
• 25:34
  I
• 25:34
  am.
• 25:35
  Right,
• 25:35
  exactly,
• 25:36
  and
• 25:36
  I'm
• 25:36
  a
• 25:36
  bad
• 25:36
  person
• 25:37
  'cause,
• 25:37
  look,
• 25:37
  there's
• 25:37
  the
• 25:38
  proof,
• 25:38
  right?
• 25:39
  So
• 25:39
  I
• 25:39
  had
• 25:39
  to
• 25:39
  be
• 25:40
  compassionate
• 25:40
  with
• 25:40
  myself.
• 25:41
  And
• 25:42
  I
• 25:42
  think
• 25:42
  because
• 25:42
  I
• 25:42
  was
• 25:42
  compassionate
• 25:43
  with
• 25:43
  myself,
• 25:43
  I
• 25:45
  That's
• 25:45
  why
• 25:45
  I
• 25:45
  don't
• 25:46
  remember
• 25:46
  what
• 25:46
  it
• 25:46
  actually
• 25:46
  was,
• 25:47
  'cause
• 25:47
  I
• 25:47
  didn't
• 25:47
  ruminate
• 25:48
  over
• 25:48
  it.
• 25:48
  And
• 25:48
  I,
• 25:48
  that's
• 25:49
  why-
• 25:49
  Uh-huh
• 25:49
  I
• 25:49
  don't
• 25:49
  have
• 25:49
  a
• 25:49
  clear
• 25:50
  recollection
• 25:51
  of
• 25:51
  what
• 25:52
  the
• 25:52
  interaction
• 25:52
  actually
• 25:53
  was,
• 25:53
  'cause
• 25:53
  there's
• 25:53
  other
• 25:53
  ones
• 25:54
  before
• 25:54
  that
• 25:54
  that
• 25:54
  I
• 25:54
  totally
• 25:54
  remember
• 25:55
  what
• 25:55
  they
• 25:55
  were,
• 25:56
  you
• 25:57
  know?
• 25:59
  Yeah,
• 25:59
  compassion
• 25:59
  is
• 26:00
  definitely
• 26:01
  work
• 26:02
  in
• 26:02
  progress
• 26:02
  for
• 26:02
  me.
• 26:03
  Well,
• 26:04
  I
• 26:04
  wa-
• 26:04
  like,
• 26:04
  and
• 26:05
  I
• 26:05
  mean,
• 26:05
  it's...
• 26:05
  I
• 26:05
  think
• 26:05
  it's
• 26:06
  a
• 26:06
  work
• 26:06
  in
• 26:06
  progress
• 26:06
  for
• 26:07
  all
• 26:07
  of
• 26:07
  us,
• 26:07
  but
• 26:07
  I've,
• 26:08
  I
• 26:09
  think,
• 26:11
  I
• 26:11
  mean,
• 26:11
  I
• 26:11
  think
• 26:11
  I'm
• 26:11
  working
• 26:12
  towards,
• 26:13
  I
• 26:14
  don't
• 26:14
  think
• 26:14
  I'm
• 26:14
  consistently
• 26:15
  practicing
• 26:15
  what
• 26:16
  you
• 26:16
  just
• 26:16
  said,
• 26:16
  but
• 26:16
  I've
• 26:17
  had
• 26:17
  moments
• 26:17
  of
• 26:17
  it.
• 26:18
  Mm.
• 26:19
  But
• 26:19
  I-
• 26:19
  but
• 26:20
  it's,
• 26:20
  it's
• 26:20
  still
• 26:21
  much
• 26:21
  more
• 26:21
  of
• 26:21
  a
• 26:21
  struggle
• 26:22
  for
• 26:22
  me
• 26:22
  to
• 26:22
  be
• 26:22
  compassionate
• 26:23
  with
• 26:23
  myself.
• 26:24
  I
• 26:24
  wanna
• 26:24
  go
• 26:24
  back
• 26:24
  to
• 26:24
  the
• 26:24
  thing
• 26:25
  that
• 26:26
  Sloane
• 26:26
  said
• 26:26
  earlier
• 26:27
  of,
• 26:27
  um-
• 26:29
  Uh
• 26:31
  Shoot.
• 26:32
  Never
• 26:32
  mind.
• 26:33
  I
• 26:33
  just
• 26:34
  lost
• 26:34
  my
• 26:34
  thought.
• 26:34
  I
• 26:34
  hate
• 26:34
  when
• 26:34
  that
• 26:34
  happens.
• 26:35
  Back
• 26:35
  to
• 26:35
  you,
• 26:35
  Adriana.
• 26:37
  Well,
• 26:37
  I
• 26:37
  was
• 26:37
  just
• 26:37
  gonna
• 26:38
  say
• 26:38
  is,
• 26:38
  you
• 26:38
  know,
• 26:38
  similar
• 26:39
  to,
• 26:39
  to,
• 26:40
  to
• 26:40
  the...
• 26:41
  building
• 26:41
  on
• 26:41
  that,
• 26:41
  Adriana,
• 26:42
  is,
• 26:42
  like,
• 26:43
  that's
• 26:43
  one
• 26:44
  way
• 26:44
  that
• 26:44
  I
• 26:45
  find
• 26:46
  compassion
• 26:47
  for
• 26:47
  people.
• 26:48
  It
• 26:48
  doesn't
• 26:48
  happen
• 26:49
  naturally.
• 26:49
  I
• 26:50
  have
• 26:50
  to
• 26:50
  cultivate
• 26:51
  it,
• 26:51
  right?
• 26:52
  Mm.
• 26:52
  Yeah.
• 26:52
  When
• 26:53
  I
• 26:53
  see
• 26:53
  somebody
• 26:53
  being
• 26:54
  a
• 26:54
  dick,
• 26:55
  I'm
• 26:55
  like,
• 26:55
  "Your
• 26:56
  snap
• 26:56
  judgment
• 26:56
  is
• 26:57
  you're
• 26:57
  a
• 26:57
  fucking
• 26:57
  dick."
• 26:58
  Yep.
• 26:58
  Like...
• 27:00
  Just
• 27:00
  came
• 27:00
  back.
• 27:02
  Okay.
• 27:02
  Of,
• 27:03
  no,
• 27:04
  how
• 27:04
  you
• 27:04
  were
• 27:04
  saying,
• 27:04
  like,
• 27:05
  I-
• 27:06
  it's,
• 27:06
  it's
• 27:06
  me
• 27:07
  sitting
• 27:07
  here
• 27:07
  going,
• 27:07
  "Well,
• 27:08
  I
• 27:08
  would
• 27:08
  never
• 27:08
  do
• 27:08
  that."
• 27:09
  Yeah.
• 27:10
  And
• 27:10
  so
• 27:11
  immediately,
• 27:12
  like,
• 27:12
  the
• 27:12
  judgment
• 27:13
  comes
• 27:13
  out.
• 27:14
  Right.
• 27:15
  And
• 27:15
  it's,
• 27:15
  "I
• 27:15
  would
• 27:15
  never
• 27:15
  do
• 27:15
  that."
• 27:16
  So
• 27:16
  it's
• 27:16
  hard
• 27:17
  for
• 27:17
  me
• 27:17
  to
• 27:17
  be
• 27:17
  compassionate
• 27:18
  with
• 27:18
  people
• 27:19
  when
• 27:20
  the
• 27:20
  way
• 27:21
  that
• 27:21
  they're
• 27:22
  behaving
• 27:22
  or
• 27:22
  moving
• 27:23
  through
• 27:23
  the
• 27:23
  world
• 27:23
  is
• 27:24
  so
• 27:24
  misaligned
• 27:24
  with
• 27:25
  my
• 27:25
  values.
• 27:25
  Yeah.
• 27:26
  Right?
• 27:28
  Um,
• 27:28
  and
• 27:28
  it's
• 27:28
  hard
• 27:29
  for
• 27:29
  me
• 27:29
  to
• 27:29
  get
• 27:29
  to
• 27:30
  that
• 27:30
  place
• 27:30
  of,
• 27:31
  like,
• 27:31
  compassion
• 27:32
  or
• 27:32
  even
• 27:34
  empathy.
• 27:35
  Um-
• 27:35
  Yeah
• 27:37
  even
• 27:37
  though,
• 27:39
  and
• 27:39
  you
• 27:39
  said
• 27:40
  this
• 27:40
  earlier,
• 27:40
  Adriana,
• 27:41
  like,
• 27:41
  even
• 27:41
  though,
• 27:41
  like,
• 27:41
  you're
• 27:42
  an
• 27:42
  empath.
• 27:42
  I'm
• 27:43
  an
• 27:43
  empath.
• 27:43
  We're,
• 27:44
  like,
• 27:44
  we're
• 27:44
  empathic
• 27:45
  people.
• 27:45
  We're
• 27:45
  deeply
• 27:46
  feeling
• 27:47
  people.
• 27:48
  Mm-hmm.
• 27:49
  And
• 27:50
  it's
• 27:51
  hard
• 27:51
  for
• 27:51
  me
• 27:53
  to-
• 27:54
  Have
• 27:55
  compassion
• 27:57
  or
• 27:57
  to
• 27:57
  show
• 27:58
  empathy
• 27:58
  towards
• 28:00
  people
• 28:01
  who...
• 28:02
  You
• 28:02
  know,
• 28:03
  like
• 28:03
  we
• 28:03
  all
• 28:03
  have
• 28:04
  choice
• 28:04
  and
• 28:05
  agency,
• 28:05
  and
• 28:05
  you're
• 28:06
  actively
• 28:06
  choosing,
• 28:07
  right?
• 28:08
  Right.
• 28:09
  You're
• 28:09
  actively
• 28:09
  choosing
• 28:10
  that
• 28:10
  way.
• 28:11
  That's
• 28:12
  an,
• 28:12
  that's
• 28:13
  an
• 28:13
  assumption.
• 28:14
  Yeah.
• 28:15
  But
• 28:16
  it
• 28:16
  is
• 28:16
  a
• 28:16
  choice,
• 28:16
  isn't
• 28:17
  it?
• 28:17
  Is
• 28:17
  it?
• 28:17
  Fair.
• 28:17
  They
• 28:17
  could
• 28:18
  be
• 28:18
  operating
• 28:18
  from,
• 28:19
  like,
• 28:19
  a
• 28:19
  more
• 28:19
  subconscious
• 28:20
  pattern.
• 28:22
  Something,
• 28:22
  like-
• 28:22
  I
• 28:22
  don't
• 28:22
  know
• 28:22
  deeply
• 28:23
  rooted.
• 28:23
  Sometimes
• 28:24
  it's
• 28:24
  not
• 28:25
  a
• 28:25
  choice
• 28:25
  for
• 28:25
  me.
• 28:26
  When
• 28:26
  I
• 28:26
  flip
• 28:27
  my
• 28:27
  lid,
• 28:27
  it's
• 28:27
  rarely
• 28:28
  a
• 28:28
  fucking
• 28:29
  choice
• 28:30
  Okay,
• 28:31
  that's
• 28:31
  fair
• 28:32
  I
• 28:32
  don't
• 28:33
  say,
• 28:33
  "I'm
• 28:34
  gonna
• 28:34
  lose
• 28:34
  my
• 28:34
  shit
• 28:35
  today,"
• 28:35
  and-
• 28:36
  It
• 28:36
  would
• 28:36
  be
• 28:36
  awesome
• 28:37
  if
• 28:37
  I
• 28:37
  just
• 28:37
  went
• 28:39
  No.
• 28:40
  That's...
• 28:41
  No.
• 28:43
  Like,
• 28:43
  I've
• 28:43
  regretted
• 28:44
  every
• 28:44
  single
• 28:44
  time
• 28:45
  I've,
• 28:45
  I've
• 28:45
  lost
• 28:46
  my
• 28:46
  shit.
• 28:47
  Like
• 28:48
  That
• 28:49
  person
• 28:50
  is
• 28:50
  not
• 28:50
  nice.
• 28:51
  Hmm.
• 28:52
  She's
• 28:53
  a
• 28:53
  bitch
• 28:53
  on
• 28:53
  wheels-
• 28:53
  I
• 28:54
  don't
• 28:54
  like
• 28:54
  her
• 28:55
  and
• 28:55
  she
• 28:55
  will
• 28:55
  destroy
• 28:57
  just
• 28:57
  about
• 28:58
  anything
• 28:58
  that
• 28:58
  gets
• 28:58
  in
• 28:59
  her
• 28:59
  path.
• 28:59
  And
• 29:00
  so-
• 29:00
  Did
• 29:00
  you
• 29:00
  just
• 29:00
  say
• 29:00
  she's
• 29:00
  a
• 29:00
  bitch
• 29:00
  on
• 29:01
  wheels?
• 29:01
  Yeah.
• 29:03
  Yeah.
• 29:04
  But
• 29:04
  it's
• 29:04
  more...
• 29:05
  It's
• 29:05
  worse
• 29:05
  than
• 29:05
  that.
• 29:06
  It's
• 29:06
  a
• 29:06
  bull
• 29:06
  in
• 29:06
  a
• 29:06
  China
• 29:07
  shop.
• 29:08
  Everything
• 29:08
  will
• 29:09
  be
• 29:09
  destroyed,
• 29:10
  regardless
• 29:10
  of
• 29:11
  whether
• 29:11
  it
• 29:11
  has
• 29:11
  anything
• 29:12
  to
• 29:12
  do
• 29:12
  with
• 29:12
  what's
• 29:13
  actually
• 29:13
  going
• 29:14
  on.
• 29:15
  Okay.
• 29:16
  Like-
• 29:16
  Okay
• 29:17
  so
• 29:17
  I'm
• 29:18
  not
• 29:18
  saying,
• 29:19
  yes,
• 29:19
  sometimes
• 29:20
  it
• 29:20
  is
• 29:20
  a
• 29:20
  choice
• 29:21
  because
• 29:21
  people
• 29:21
  are
• 29:21
  choosing
• 29:22
  to
• 29:22
  live
• 29:23
  that
• 29:23
  way.
• 29:23
  But
• 29:24
  at
• 29:24
  other
• 29:24
  times-
• 29:25
  And
• 29:25
  choosing
• 29:25
  not
• 29:25
  to
• 29:25
  change
• 29:25
  it.
• 29:26
  Yeah
• 29:28
  stuff
• 29:28
  happens,
• 29:29
  man.
• 29:30
  Sure
• 29:30
  Like...
• 29:32
  Okay.
• 29:33
  I
• 29:33
  think
• 29:33
  it's
• 29:33
  still...
• 29:33
  Okay.
• 29:34
  That's-
• 29:35
  Now
• 29:35
  I'm
• 29:36
  gonna
• 29:36
  have
• 29:36
  to,
• 29:36
  like,
• 29:37
  unpack
• 29:37
  that,
• 29:38
  um,
• 29:39
  some
• 29:40
  more.
• 29:40
  But
• 29:41
  coming
• 29:42
  to,
• 29:42
  like-
• 29:42
  I
• 29:42
  have
• 29:42
  to
• 29:42
  rethink
• 29:42
  my
• 29:42
  entire
• 29:43
  judgment
• 29:43
  theory
• 29:44
  I
• 29:44
  know.
• 29:44
  What
• 29:44
  the-
• 29:45
  Right.
• 29:45
  I
• 29:45
  hate
• 29:46
  when
• 29:46
  you
• 29:46
  do
• 29:46
  that.
• 29:46
  I
• 29:47
  hate
• 29:47
  when
• 29:47
  you
• 29:47
  make
• 29:47
  me
• 29:48
  rethink
• 29:48
  shit.
• 29:50
  I
• 29:50
  was
• 29:50
  perfectly
• 29:51
  comfortable
• 29:51
  in
• 29:51
  my
• 29:53
  limited
• 29:53
  ways.
• 29:53
  Judgment.
• 29:53
  Um.
• 29:54
  Well,
• 29:54
  again,
• 29:55
  we'll
• 29:55
  just
• 29:55
  apply
• 29:55
  that,
• 29:55
  the
• 29:56
  same
• 29:56
  thing
• 29:56
  that
• 29:57
  I
• 29:57
  brought
• 29:57
  up
• 29:57
  earlier
• 29:57
  to
• 29:57
  that,
• 29:58
  right?
• 29:58
  Like,
• 29:59
  you
• 29:59
  see
• 29:59
  somebody
• 30:00
  doing
• 30:00
  something
• 30:01
  and
• 30:01
  you're
• 30:01
  like,
• 30:02
  "They're
• 30:03
  not
• 30:03
  a
• 30:03
  good
• 30:04
  person.
• 30:04
  They're
• 30:04
  an
• 30:04
  asshole
• 30:05
  because
• 30:06
  they're
• 30:06
  doing
• 30:06
  this."
• 30:07
  Put
• 30:08
  me
• 30:08
  in
• 30:08
  that
• 30:08
  situation.
• 30:11
  How
• 30:11
  would
• 30:11
  I
• 30:11
  react
• 30:11
  if
• 30:12
  I
• 30:12
  saw
• 30:12
  Stacy
• 30:12
  doing
• 30:13
  that?
• 30:14
  And
• 30:14
  be
• 30:14
  like,
• 30:14
  "Girl,
• 30:14
  you
• 30:14
  good?
• 30:15
  Are
• 30:15
  you
• 30:15
  okay?"
• 30:16
  Exactly.
• 30:17
  Because
• 30:18
  you
• 30:18
  would
• 30:18
  know,
• 30:19
  because
• 30:19
  you
• 30:19
  know
• 30:19
  me.
• 30:20
  Right.
• 30:20
  Right.
• 30:20
  And
• 30:20
  you
• 30:20
  know-
• 30:21
  'Cause
• 30:21
  I
• 30:21
  have
• 30:21
  more
• 30:21
  context
• 30:22
  if
• 30:22
  I
• 30:22
  have
• 30:23
  lost
• 30:23
  my
• 30:24
  shit,
• 30:24
  there
• 30:25
  is
• 30:25
  definitely
• 30:25
  something
• 30:26
  wrong.
• 30:27
  Right?
• 30:27
  It's
• 30:27
  for
• 30:27
  good
• 30:27
  reason.
• 30:29
  Right.
• 30:30
  I
• 30:30
  don't
• 30:30
  know
• 30:30
  about
• 30:30
  that
• 30:30
  every
• 30:31
  time,
• 30:31
  but...
• 30:32
  I
• 30:33
  mean,
• 30:33
  somewhere
• 30:33
  deep
• 30:33
  inside,
• 30:34
  yes,
• 30:34
  there's
• 30:34
  a
• 30:34
  very
• 30:35
  good
• 30:35
  reason.
• 30:35
  Right.
• 30:35
  What's
• 30:36
  happening
• 30:36
  on
• 30:36
  the
• 30:36
  surface
• 30:37
  might
• 30:37
  have
• 30:37
  nothing
• 30:38
  to
• 30:38
  do
• 30:39
  with
• 30:39
  the
• 30:41
  real-
• 30:41
  Right
• 30:41
  thing,
• 30:41
  right?
• 30:41
  But-
• 30:41
  Okay.
• 30:42
  So
• 30:42
  that's,
• 30:43
  that's
• 30:43
  maybe,
• 30:44
  like,
• 30:44
  coming
• 30:45
  to
• 30:45
  this
• 30:45
  part
• 30:45
  of
• 30:45
  the
• 30:45
  value
• 30:46
  of,
• 30:46
  like,
• 30:46
  we,
• 30:47
  we
• 30:48
  witness,
• 30:48
  we
• 30:48
  support.
• 30:49
  Like,
• 30:49
  we
• 30:50
  don't
• 30:50
  try
• 30:50
  to
• 30:50
  fix
• 30:50
  and
• 30:50
  solve,
• 30:51
  like,
• 30:51
  those
• 30:52
  things.
• 30:52
  So
• 30:53
  the,
• 30:53
  the
• 30:53
  compassion
• 30:54
  is,
• 30:54
  like,
• 30:55
  it's
• 30:56
  not
• 30:56
  conditional,
• 30:58
  and
• 30:58
  that's
• 30:58
  the
• 30:58
  part
• 30:58
  that's
• 30:59
  so
• 30:59
  hard
• 30:59
  for
• 30:59
  me
• 30:59
  to
• 30:59
  practice.
• 31:00
  Mm.
• 31:01
  Yep.
• 31:01
  Right?
• 31:02
  Like,
• 31:02
  it's
• 31:02
  not...
• 31:03
  Like,
• 31:04
  we're
• 31:04
  saying
• 31:05
  how
• 31:05
  much
• 31:05
  easier
• 31:05
  it
• 31:06
  is
• 31:06
  to
• 31:06
  show
• 31:06
  up
• 31:07
  that
• 31:07
  way
• 31:07
  in
• 31:08
  certain
• 31:08
  situations
• 31:09
  or
• 31:09
  for
• 31:09
  certain
• 31:09
  people
• 31:10
  where
• 31:10
  we
• 31:10
  have
• 31:10
  more
• 31:10
  context.
• 31:11
  Right.
• 31:12
  It's
• 31:12
  much
• 31:12
  harder
• 31:13
  when
• 31:14
  we're
• 31:14
  making
• 31:14
  assumptions
• 31:15
  about
• 31:15
  the
• 31:15
  situation
• 31:16
  or
• 31:16
  the
• 31:16
  person,
• 31:17
  and
• 31:17
  we
• 31:17
  don't
• 31:17
  actually
• 31:17
  have
• 31:17
  context.
• 31:18
  We're
• 31:18
  filling
• 31:18
  in
• 31:18
  the
• 31:19
  gaps.
• 31:19
  Yeah.
• 31:20
  Um,
• 31:21
  that's
• 31:21
  a
• 31:22
  really
• 31:22
  interesting
• 31:23
  perspective,
• 31:24
  because
• 31:26
  the
• 31:26
  other,
• 31:26
  like,
• 31:27
  the
• 31:27
  other
• 31:27
  piece
• 31:27
  of
• 31:28
  that
• 31:28
  is,
• 31:28
  like,
• 31:28
  sometimes
• 31:29
  it's
• 31:29
  hard
• 31:30
  when
• 31:30
  we
• 31:30
  can
• 31:30
  see
• 31:32
  someone
• 31:32
  struggling
• 31:34
  and
• 31:34
  choosing
• 31:35
  not
• 31:35
  to,
• 31:37
  um,
• 31:39
  just,
• 31:39
  like,
• 31:40
  do
• 31:40
  something
• 31:40
  about
• 31:40
  it,
• 31:41
  right?
• 31:41
  Right.
• 31:43
  But
• 31:43
  the
• 31:43
  other
• 31:44
  side
• 31:44
  of
• 31:44
  that
• 31:44
  is,
• 31:45
  like,
• 31:45
  the
• 31:45
  performative,
• 31:47
  like,
• 31:47
  healing
• 31:48
  or
• 31:48
  the-
• 31:48
  Mm-hmm
• 31:49
  like,
• 31:49
  perform-
• 31:49
  like,
• 31:50
  the
• 31:50
  things
• 31:50
  that
• 31:50
  are
• 31:50
  disingenuous
• 31:51
  in
• 31:51
  the
• 31:52
  way-
• 31:52
  Mm-hmm
• 31:52
  that
• 31:52
  they
• 31:52
  show
• 31:52
  up,
• 31:53
  which
• 31:53
  also
• 31:54
  is
• 31:54
  a
• 31:54
  struggle
• 31:54
  for
• 31:55
  me.
• 31:55
  Um,
• 31:57
  but-
• 31:58
  Gosh,
• 31:58
  that's
• 31:59
  so
• 31:59
  interesting
• 32:00
  because
• 32:01
  when
• 32:01
  we
• 32:01
  talk
• 32:01
  about,
• 32:02
  like,
• 32:02
  being
• 32:02
  deeply
• 32:03
  empathetic
• 32:03
  people
• 32:04
  and,
• 32:04
  like,
• 32:04
  deeply
• 32:05
  feeling
• 32:05
  people,
• 32:07
  um
• 32:08
  It
• 32:08
  fee-,
• 32:09
  it
• 32:09
  still
• 32:09
  feels
• 32:11
  I
• 32:11
  don't
• 32:11
  know.
• 32:12
  It
• 32:12
  still
• 32:12
  feels
• 32:12
  like
• 32:12
  there's,
• 32:14
  like,
• 32:14
  a
• 32:14
  lot
• 32:14
  of
• 32:15
  work
• 32:15
  for
• 32:15
  me
• 32:15
  to
• 32:15
  do.
• 32:15
  Because
• 32:17
  the
• 32:17
  challenge-
• 32:18
  I
• 32:18
  agree.
• 32:19
  The
• 32:19
  challenge
• 32:20
  that
• 32:20
  you're
• 32:20
  talking
• 32:21
  about
• 32:21
  is
• 32:21
  because
• 32:22
  I
• 32:22
  know
• 32:22
  you,
• 32:23
  and
• 32:23
  because
• 32:23
  I
• 32:23
  love
• 32:24
  you,
• 32:24
  and
• 32:24
  because
• 32:24
  I
• 32:24
  have
• 32:24
  context
• 32:25
  into,
• 32:25
  like,
• 32:26
  who
• 32:26
  you
• 32:26
  are
• 32:26
  as
• 32:26
  a
• 32:26
  person,
• 32:28
  your,
• 32:28
  your
• 32:29
  history,
• 32:29
  your
• 32:29
  healing,
• 32:30
  like
• 32:30
  the
• 32:30
  things
• 32:30
  that
• 32:31
  you're
• 32:31
  working
• 32:31
  on,
• 32:32
  it's
• 32:33
  way
• 32:33
  easier
• 32:33
  for
• 32:34
  me
• 32:34
  to
• 32:34
  have
• 32:35
  empathy
• 32:36
  for
• 32:36
  you-
• 32:37
  Right
• 32:37
  to
• 32:37
  have
• 32:37
  compassion
• 32:38
  for
• 32:38
  you-
• 32:39
  Right
• 32:39
  because
• 32:39
  I
• 32:39
  have
• 32:39
  a
• 32:39
  deeper
• 32:40
  understanding
• 32:42
  And
• 32:42
  empathy
• 32:42
  too
• 32:43
  is
• 32:43
  like
• 32:43
  wh-
• 32:44
  uh,
• 32:44
  like
• 32:44
  I
• 32:44
  read
• 32:45
  that
• 32:45
  thing
• 32:45
  recently
• 32:46
  that
• 32:46
  I
• 32:46
  shared
• 32:46
  with
• 32:46
  you
• 32:46
  guys,
• 32:47
  like
• 32:48
  cognitive
• 32:48
  empathy
• 32:49
  versus
• 32:49
  affective
• 32:50
  empathy.
• 32:51
  Mm-hmm.
• 32:51
  The
• 32:52
  difference
• 32:52
  between,
• 32:52
  like,
• 32:54
  understanding
• 32:56
  other
• 32:56
  people's
• 32:56
  perspectives,
• 32:57
  like
• 32:58
  finding
• 32:58
  ways
• 32:59
  to,
• 32:59
  like,
• 32:59
  make
• 33:00
  connection
• 33:00
  and
• 33:00
  build
• 33:01
  trust,
• 33:01
  and
• 33:02
  show,
• 33:03
  show
• 33:03
  up
• 33:03
  for
• 33:03
  someone,
• 33:03
  like
• 33:04
  hold
• 33:04
  space
• 33:04
  for
• 33:04
  someone
• 33:05
  and,
• 33:05
  and
• 33:05
  show
• 33:05
  empathy,
• 33:07
  versus
• 33:07
  the
• 33:07
  affective
• 33:08
  empathy,
• 33:10
  which
• 33:10
  is
• 33:10
  taking
• 33:11
  it
• 33:11
  on.
• 33:12
  Hmm.
• 33:12
  Like
• 33:13
  feeling
• 33:13
  what
• 33:13
  they
• 33:14
  feel,
• 33:14
  which
• 33:14
  leads
• 33:15
  to
• 33:15
  either,
• 33:16
  like,
• 33:16
  our
• 33:16
  own
• 33:17
  emotional
• 33:17
  burnout
• 33:18
  because
• 33:19
  we're
• 33:21
  taking
• 33:21
  on
• 33:21
  things
• 33:21
  that
• 33:21
  aren't
• 33:22
  ours.
• 33:22
  Mm-hmm.
• 33:23
  Right?
• 33:23
  And
• 33:24
  we
• 33:24
  become,
• 33:24
  like,
• 33:24
  emotionally
• 33:25
  drained
• 33:25
  or
• 33:25
  emotionally
• 33:26
  exhausted.
• 33:26
  Or
• 33:27
  it
• 33:27
  leads
• 33:28
  to
• 33:28
  that,
• 33:28
  like,
• 33:28
  codependent
• 33:28
  enmeshment
• 33:30
  where,
• 33:30
  like,
• 33:31
  I'm
• 33:31
  only
• 33:31
  good
• 33:31
  if
• 33:31
  you're
• 33:32
  good.
• 33:32
  Mm-hmm.
• 33:33
  Like
• 33:33
  that
• 33:33
  affective
• 33:34
  empathy
• 33:34
  is
• 33:35
  not
• 33:35
  a,
• 33:36
  like,
• 33:36
  a
• 33:37
  steady
• 33:37
  or
• 33:37
  healthy
• 33:38
  space
• 33:39
  to
• 33:39
  be
• 33:39
  in.
• 33:39
  Yeah.
• 33:40
  And
• 33:40
  so
• 33:40
  I
• 33:40
  think
• 33:41
  I,
• 33:41
  like...
• 33:42
  I
• 33:42
  think
• 33:42
  I
• 33:42
  also
• 33:42
  have
• 33:42
  a
• 33:42
  little
• 33:43
  bit
• 33:43
  of
• 33:43
  trouble.
• 33:45
  Maybe
• 33:45
  this
• 33:45
  is,
• 33:45
  like,
• 33:45
  my,
• 33:47
  my
• 33:47
  all
• 33:47
  or
• 33:47
  nothing
• 33:48
  thinking,
• 33:48
  but,
• 33:48
  like,
• 33:48
  I
• 33:48
  have
• 33:49
  a
• 33:49
  little
• 33:49
  bit
• 33:49
  of
• 33:49
  trouble
• 33:49
  because
• 33:50
  I'm
• 33:50
  like,
• 33:50
  "Okay,
• 33:50
  then,
• 33:50
  well,
• 33:50
  what
• 33:51
  are
• 33:51
  the
• 33:51
  rules?"
• 33:52
  Right?
• 33:53
  Like
• 33:53
  when-
• 33:53
  Yeah.
• 33:54
  That
• 33:54
  makes
• 33:54
  sense
• 33:54
  to
• 33:54
  me
• 33:54
  when
• 33:54
  is
• 33:54
  it
• 33:54
  okay
• 33:55
  for
• 33:55
  me
• 33:55
  to
• 33:55
  be
• 33:55
  compassionate
• 33:56
  towards
• 33:57
  someone,
• 33:58
  and
• 33:58
  when
• 33:58
  does
• 33:59
  that,
• 33:59
  like,
• 33:59
  when
• 33:59
  is
• 33:59
  that
• 34:00
  person
• 34:01
  I
• 34:01
  don't
• 34:01
  know.
• 34:03
  But
• 34:03
  I
• 34:03
  guess,
• 34:03
  like,
• 34:03
  the
• 34:03
  rule
• 34:04
  is-
• 34:06
  Be
• 34:06
  compassionate
• 34:07
  to
• 34:07
  everybody?
• 34:08
  Always.
• 34:08
  Yeah.
• 34:09
  That's,
• 34:10
  I
• 34:10
  know,
• 34:10
  I
• 34:11
  know
• 34:12
  that
• 34:12
  it
• 34:12
  is.
• 34:12
  Don't
• 34:12
  be
• 34:12
  selective
• 34:13
  Okay.
• 34:14
  So
• 34:14
  I
• 34:15
  understand
• 34:15
  that
• 34:15
  we
• 34:15
  have
• 34:16
  to
• 34:16
  be
• 34:16
  compassionate
• 34:16
  towards
• 34:17
  everybody.
• 34:17
  I
• 34:18
  totally
• 34:18
  get
• 34:18
  that.
• 34:20
  And
• 34:20
  because
• 34:21
  I'm
• 34:21
  someone
• 34:21
  who
• 34:21
  really
• 34:22
  enjoys
• 34:22
  watching
• 34:23
  t-
• 34:23
  true
• 34:23
  crime
• 34:25
  I
• 34:25
  have
• 34:25
  a
• 34:25
  hard
• 34:25
  time
• 34:26
  with
• 34:26
  being
• 34:26
  compassionate,
• 34:27
  you
• 34:28
  know?
• 34:29
  No,
• 34:29
  I
• 34:29
  get
• 34:29
  it.
• 34:29
  Right.
• 34:30
  But
• 34:30
  like-
• 34:30
  You
• 34:30
  know,
• 34:30
  with
• 34:30
  people
• 34:31
  like
• 34:31
  that.
• 34:31
  That's,
• 34:31
  that's
• 34:32
  what
• 34:32
  I'm
• 34:32
  That's
• 34:32
  what
• 34:32
  Those
• 34:33
  are
• 34:33
  the
• 34:33
  kind
• 34:33
  of
• 34:33
  people
• 34:34
  where
• 34:34
  I
• 34:34
  say,
• 34:34
  like,
• 34:34
  that
• 34:35
  they're
• 34:35
  bad,
• 34:36
  nasty.
• 34:36
  Like,
• 34:36
  bad
• 34:37
  people
• 34:37
  that
• 34:37
  I
• 34:37
  have-
• 34:38
  Nasty
• 34:38
  a
• 34:38
  hard
• 34:38
  time
• 34:38
  having
• 34:38
  compassion
• 34:39
  for.
• 34:41
  What'd
• 34:41
  you
• 34:41
  say?
• 34:42
  Nasty.
• 34:42
  Nasty.
• 34:43
  Nasty.
• 34:43
  That's
• 34:43
  how
• 34:43
  you
• 34:44
  say
• 34:44
  it.
• 34:45
  Um,
• 34:46
  no,
• 34:46
  I
• 34:46
  get
• 34:46
  it.
• 34:47
  This
• 34:47
  Compassion
• 34:48
  doesn't
• 34:48
  mean
• 34:48
  giving
• 34:49
  them
• 34:49
  a
• 34:49
  free
• 34:49
  pass.
• 34:50
  Right.
• 34:51
  Right?
• 34:51
  And
• 34:51
  it,
• 34:51
  and
• 34:52
  it
• 34:52
  also
• 34:52
  doesn't
• 34:52
  mean
• 34:53
  excusing-
• 34:54
  Exactly
• 34:54
  bad
• 34:55
  behavior.
• 34:55
  Well,
• 34:56
  okay.
• 34:56
  Exactly.
• 34:57
  Actually
• 34:57
  Ah,
• 34:58
  okay.
• 34:58
  This
• 34:58
  is
• 34:59
  really
• 34:59
  good.
• 34:59
  I
• 34:59
  know.
• 35:00
  I'm
• 35:00
  glad
• 35:00
  that
• 35:00
  you
• 35:00
  said
• 35:00
  that
• 35:00
  it
• 35:01
  doesn't
• 35:01
  mean
• 35:01
  giving
• 35:01
  them
• 35:01
  a
• 35:01
  free
• 35:01
  pass,
• 35:02
  because,
• 35:04
  for
• 35:04
  example,
• 35:04
  yesterday
• 35:05
  I
• 35:05
  was
• 35:05
  watching,
• 35:06
  um,
• 35:07
  the
• 35:07
  sentencing
• 35:07
  of
• 35:08
  someone
• 35:09
  who
• 35:09
  did
• 35:09
  something
• 35:09
  bad,
• 35:10
  and,
• 35:11
  and
• 35:12
  the
• 35:12
  jury
• 35:13
  was
• 35:13
  deliberating
• 35:13
  whether
• 35:14
  he
• 35:14
  gets
• 35:14
  life
• 35:15
  in
• 35:15
  prison
• 35:15
  or,
• 35:17
  um,
• 35:18
  if
• 35:18
  he
• 35:18
  goes,
• 35:18
  if
• 35:18
  he,
• 35:19
  uh,
• 35:19
  gets,
• 35:19
  um,
• 35:20
  sh-
• 35:22
  Why
• 35:22
  can't
• 35:22
  I
• 35:22
  think
• 35:22
  of
• 35:22
  the
• 35:23
  other
• 35:23
  one?
• 35:24
  Lethal
• 35:24
  injection?
• 35:25
  Yes.
• 35:26
  What's
• 35:26
  it
• 35:26
  called?
• 35:27
  The
• 35:27
  death
• 35:28
  penalty?
• 35:28
  Death
• 35:28
  penalty.
• 35:29
  Thank
• 35:29
  you.
• 35:29
  My
• 35:29
  God..
• 35:30
  Freaking
• 35:31
  menopause.
• 35:31
  Okay.
• 35:32
  Ah.
• 35:33
  Uh,
• 35:34
  so
• 35:34
  death
• 35:34
  sentence,
• 35:34
  right?
• 35:35
  And,
• 35:36
  um,
• 35:37
  and
• 35:37
  he
• 35:37
  got
• 35:37
  the
• 35:37
  death
• 35:38
  sentence,
• 35:39
  and
• 35:39
  I
• 35:39
  got
• 35:40
  really
• 35:40
  emotional
• 35:40
  because
• 35:41
  I
• 35:41
  felt
• 35:41
  like,
• 35:42
  how
• 35:42
  sad.
• 35:43
  I,
• 35:43
  I
• 35:43
  actually
• 35:44
  felt
• 35:44
  compassion
• 35:44
  for
• 35:45
  him,
• 35:45
  you
• 35:45
  know,
• 35:46
  because
• 35:46
  I'm
• 35:47
  like,
• 35:48
  he's
• 35:48
  a
• 35:48
  human,
• 35:48
  too
• 35:50
  and
• 35:50
  of
• 35:50
  course
• 35:50
  what
• 35:50
  he
• 35:50
  did
• 35:50
  was
• 35:51
  awful,
• 35:53
  but
• 35:54
  now
• 35:54
  he's
• 35:55
  gonna
• 35:55
  be
• 35:55
  put
• 35:55
  to
• 35:55
  death.
• 35:56
  So
• 35:56
  I,
• 35:56
  I
• 35:56
  actually
• 35:56
  got
• 35:57
  emotional,
• 35:57
  so,
• 35:57
  okay,
• 35:57
  so
• 35:58
  I
• 35:58
  take
• 35:58
  it
• 35:58
  back.
• 35:58
  I
• 35:58
  can
• 35:59
  have
• 35:59
  some
• 35:59
  compassion,
• 36:00
  a
• 36:00
  little
• 36:00
  bit,
• 36:00
  but
• 36:00
  I
• 36:00
  was
• 36:00
  like,
• 36:01
  "But
• 36:01
  you
• 36:01
  did
• 36:02
  that,"
• 36:03
  so,
• 36:04
  um...
• 36:06
  I
• 36:06
  think
• 36:06
  the
• 36:07
  boundary
• 36:07
  for
• 36:07
  me
• 36:08
  that
• 36:08
  I
• 36:08
  need
• 36:08
  to,
• 36:08
  like,
• 36:09
  maybe
• 36:09
  set
• 36:09
  is
• 36:10
  that,
• 36:10
  like,
• 36:11
  it's,
• 36:12
  it's
• 36:12
  similar
• 36:12
  to
• 36:13
  the
• 36:13
  same
• 36:13
  thing,
• 36:14
  the
• 36:14
  same
• 36:14
  idea
• 36:15
  around,
• 36:15
  like,
• 36:15
  forgiveness,
• 36:16
  right?
• 36:16
  Like,
• 36:16
  forgiveness
• 36:17
  isn't
• 36:17
  for
• 36:17
  them,
• 36:18
  it's
• 36:18
  for
• 36:18
  me.
• 36:19
  Mm-hmm.
• 36:19
  It's
• 36:20
  for
• 36:20
  me
• 36:20
  to,
• 36:20
  like,
• 36:20
  be
• 36:21
  able
• 36:21
  to,
• 36:21
  like,
• 36:21
  let
• 36:21
  go
• 36:22
  so
• 36:22
  the
• 36:22
  compa-
• 36:23
  And
• 36:23
  it's
• 36:23
  not
• 36:23
  an
• 36:23
  excuse
• 36:24
  for
• 36:24
  bad
• 36:24
  behavior
• 36:25
  or
• 36:25
  like-
• 36:26
  Yeah
• 36:26
  anything
• 36:27
  like
• 36:27
  that.
• 36:27
  So
• 36:27
  I
• 36:27
  think
• 36:28
  maybe
• 36:28
  the
• 36:28
  boundary
• 36:29
  on
• 36:29
  those
• 36:30
  extreme
• 36:30
  cases
• 36:31
  of,
• 36:31
  like,
• 36:32
  how
• 36:32
  do
• 36:32
  you
• 36:32
  show
• 36:32
  compassionate
• 36:33
  to
• 36:33
  s-
• 36:33
  compassion
• 36:34
  to
• 36:34
  someone
• 36:34
  who's
• 36:36
  truly,
• 36:38
  like,
• 36:39
  causing
• 36:39
  harm,
• 36:40
  like
• 36:40
  actively
• 36:40
  causing
• 36:41
  harm,
• 36:41
  right?
• 36:42
  Yeah.
• 36:42
  It's,
• 36:43
  I'm
• 36:43
  not,
• 36:44
  it's,
• 36:44
  it,
• 36:45
  it
• 36:45
  doesn't
• 36:46
  mean,
• 36:47
  it
• 36:47
  doesn't
• 36:47
  even
• 36:48
  necessarily
• 36:48
  mean
• 36:49
  I
• 36:49
  empathize
• 36:50
  with
• 36:50
  them.
• 36:51
  It's
• 36:51
  that,
• 36:52
  like-
• 36:54
  I
• 36:54
  have
• 36:54
  compassion
• 36:54
  for
• 36:55
  whatever
• 36:55
  happened
• 36:55
  in
• 36:55
  your
• 36:56
  life
• 36:56
  that
• 36:56
  led
• 36:56
  you
• 36:56
  to
• 36:57
  this
• 36:57
  place
• 36:58
  Yeah,
• 36:58
  it's
• 36:58
  like
• 36:58
  you're
• 36:58
  having
• 36:58
  a
• 36:58
  human,
• 36:59
  a
• 36:59
  moment
• 36:59
  of,
• 36:59
  like-
• 37:00
  It's-
• 37:00
  humanness
• 37:00
  yeah.
• 37:01
  Like,
• 37:02
  things
• 37:02
  must
• 37:03
  have
• 37:03
  been
• 37:03
  really
• 37:03
  hard
• 37:04
  for,
• 37:04
  for
• 37:04
  it
• 37:04
  to
• 37:04
  come
• 37:05
  to
• 37:05
  this.
• 37:06
  Yeah.
• 37:06
  And
• 37:07
  that's
• 37:08
  terrible.
• 37:09
  But
• 37:10
  I
• 37:10
  guess
• 37:10
  that's-
• 37:10
  And
• 37:10
  he
• 37:10
  said-
• 37:10
  what
• 37:10
  we
• 37:10
  need
• 37:10
  to
• 37:11
  consider,
• 37:11
  right?
• 37:11
  Like,
• 37:12
  those
• 37:12
  are
• 37:12
  the
• 37:12
  things
• 37:12
  that
• 37:12
  we
• 37:12
  need
• 37:13
  to
• 37:13
  consider
• 37:13
  in
• 37:13
  those
• 37:13
  moments
• 37:14
  when
• 37:14
  all
• 37:15
  we're
• 37:15
  seeing
• 37:15
  is
• 37:15
  the
• 37:15
  bad.
• 37:17
  Yeah.
• 37:18
  Yeah.
• 37:18
  But
• 37:18
  not,
• 37:18
  but,
• 37:19
  but
• 37:19
  not
• 37:19
  making
• 37:19
  it
• 37:19
  okay.
• 37:20
  But
• 37:20
  it's
• 37:20
  not,
• 37:20
  it's
• 37:20
  still
• 37:20
  not
• 37:20
  excusing.
• 37:21
  Right,
• 37:21
  not
• 37:22
  excusing
• 37:22
  it,
• 37:22
  right.
• 37:23
  Correct.
• 37:24
  But
• 37:25
  also,
• 37:25
  like,
• 37:26
  I
• 37:26
  think
• 37:27
  another
• 37:27
  way
• 37:27
  that
• 37:27
  I
• 37:28
  find
• 37:29
  compassion
• 37:30
  for
• 37:31
  bad
• 37:31
  people,
• 37:33
  uh,
• 37:33
  if
• 37:34
  we're
• 37:34
  gonna
• 37:34
  just
• 37:34
  use
• 37:34
  the
• 37:34
  broad
• 37:35
  term,
• 37:35
  is-
• 37:35
  Yeah
• 37:37
  You
• 37:37
  know,
• 37:38
  they're
• 37:38
  missing
• 37:38
  out
• 37:39
  on
• 37:39
  a
• 37:39
  lot
• 37:40
  I-
• 37:41
  that's
• 37:42
  what
• 37:42
  I
• 37:42
  think
• 37:42
  about
• 37:43
  too.
• 37:43
  I
• 37:44
  think
• 37:44
  about
• 37:44
  that
• 37:44
  too,
• 37:45
  where
• 37:45
  I'm
• 37:45
  like,
• 37:46
  I
• 37:46
  like,
• 37:48
  I
• 37:48
  think
• 37:48
  about
• 37:49
  s-
• 37:50
  Like
• 37:50
  the
• 37:50
  healing
• 37:50
  side
• 37:51
  of
• 37:51
  it,
• 37:51
  right?
• 37:52
  Where
• 37:52
  you're
• 37:52
  like,
• 37:53
  "I
• 37:53
  know
• 37:54
  that
• 37:54
  it's
• 37:54
  scary,
• 37:55
  and
• 37:55
  I
• 37:55
  know
• 37:55
  that
• 37:56
  it's
• 37:56
  hard,
• 37:56
  but
• 37:56
  I
• 37:56
  promise-"
• 37:58
  Mm
• 37:58
  "everything
• 37:59
  that's
• 37:59
  on
• 37:59
  the
• 37:59
  other
• 37:59
  side
• 38:00
  of
• 38:00
  that
• 38:00
  is
• 38:00
  so
• 38:01
  much
• 38:01
  better
• 38:02
  than
• 38:02
  the
• 38:03
  pain
• 38:03
  you're
• 38:03
  feeling
• 38:03
  now."
• 38:03
  Like,
• 38:03
  the
• 38:04
  pain
• 38:04
  of
• 38:04
  going
• 38:04
  through
• 38:05
  the
• 38:05
  healing,
• 38:05
  it's
• 38:05
  still
• 38:06
  painful.
• 38:07
  Mm.
• 38:07
  But
• 38:08
  that's
• 38:09
  better
• 38:09
  than
• 38:10
  what
• 38:10
  you're
• 38:10
  feeling
• 38:10
  now.
• 38:11
  It's
• 38:11
  also
• 38:12
  a
• 38:12
  different
• 38:12
  kind
• 38:12
  of
• 38:12
  pain,
• 38:13
  though.
• 38:13
  It
• 38:13
  is.
• 38:14
  It's
• 38:14
  not,
• 38:14
  you're
• 38:14
  not-
• 38:15
  It
• 38:15
  is
• 38:15
  you're
• 38:15
  not
• 38:15
  suffering
• 38:16
  in,
• 38:16
  like,
• 38:17
  that-
• 38:18
  And
• 38:18
  the
• 38:18
  same
• 38:18
  thing
• 38:18
  where-
• 38:18
  Yeah
• 38:18
  you're
• 38:18
  allowing
• 38:18
  that
• 38:18
  thing
• 38:18
  to
• 38:19
  hurt
• 38:19
  you.
• 38:21
  Yeah,
• 38:21
  you're
• 38:21
  letting
• 38:21
  it
• 38:21
  go.
• 38:22
  But-
• 38:22
  Right
• 38:22
  Yeah,
• 38:23
  you're
• 38:23
  actually
• 38:23
  letting
• 38:23
  it
• 38:23
  go.
• 38:23
  And-
• 38:24
  It's
• 38:24
  a
• 38:24
  different
• 38:24
  kind
• 38:24
  of
• 38:24
  pain.
• 38:24
  It-
• 38:24
  It's
• 38:25
  a
• 38:25
  different
• 38:25
  kind
• 38:25
  of
• 38:25
  pain-
• 38:26
  It's
• 38:26
  like
• 38:26
  a
• 38:26
  relief
• 38:28
  but
• 38:28
  it's
• 38:28
  such
• 38:28
  a
• 38:28
  rewarding
• 38:29
  pain.
• 38:29
  A-
• 38:29
  So
• 38:29
  rewarding
• 38:29
  it's
• 38:29
  like
• 38:29
  relief
• 38:29
  through
• 38:29
  the
• 38:30
  pain.
• 38:30
  Like,
• 38:30
  it's-
• 38:30
  Yeah.
• 38:31
  Yeah
• 38:32
  so
• 38:32
  interesting.
• 38:33
  'Cause
• 38:33
  it's
• 38:33
  like
• 38:33
  actually
• 38:34
  looking
• 38:34
  at
• 38:34
  the
• 38:34
  pain,
• 38:35
  recognizing
• 38:35
  it,
• 38:36
  and
• 38:36
  I
• 38:36
  mean,
• 38:37
  and
• 38:37
  also
• 38:38
  I
• 38:38
  feel
• 38:38
  that
• 38:38
  it's
• 38:38
  taking
• 38:39
  accountability
• 38:39
  for
• 38:40
  that
• 38:40
  pain
• 38:40
  too.
• 38:40
  'Cause
• 38:41
  even
• 38:41
  if
• 38:41
  someone,
• 38:42
  if
• 38:42
  you're
• 38:42
  not
• 38:43
  responsible
• 38:44
  for
• 38:44
  it-
• 38:45
  We
• 38:46
  have
• 38:46
  to
• 38:46
  take
• 38:46
  accountability
• 38:46
  for
• 38:47
  parts
• 38:47
  of
• 38:47
  it
• 38:48
  Yeah
• 38:48
  Does
• 38:48
  that
• 38:48
  make
• 38:49
  sense?
• 38:50
  Yeah.
• 38:50
  I,
• 38:50
  I
• 38:50
  like
• 38:51
  that
• 38:51
  perspective
• 38:51
  too.
• 38:52
  Like,
• 38:53
  I'm
• 38:53
  Like,
• 38:54
  it,
• 38:54
  it
• 38:54
  sucks
• 38:55
  that
• 38:55
  you're
• 38:55
  missing
• 38:55
  out
• 38:56
  on
• 38:57
  all
• 38:57
  of
• 38:57
  this,
• 38:58
  like,
• 38:59
  good.
• 38:59
  Yeah.
• 39:00
  Yeah.
• 39:02
  Right?
• 39:02
  Right?
• 39:03
  'Cause,
• 39:03
  I
• 39:03
  mean,
• 39:03
  going
• 39:03
  back
• 39:03
  to
• 39:04
  Adriana's
• 39:05
  example,
• 39:07
  you
• 39:07
  know,
• 39:07
  like
• 39:08
  serial
• 39:08
  killers
• 39:08
  and
• 39:09
  stuff,
• 39:09
  they
• 39:09
  don't
• 39:09
  feel
• 39:10
  like
• 39:10
  we
• 39:10
  feel.
• 39:11
  And
• 39:12
  how
• 39:12
  fucking-
• 39:12
  Right
• 39:13
  sad
• 39:13
  is
• 39:13
  that?
• 39:14
  Yeah,
• 39:14
  they
• 39:14
  don't.
• 39:14
  That's
• 39:14
  Exactly.
• 39:15
  Like,
• 39:16
  they're
• 39:16
  missing
• 39:17
  so
• 39:17
  much
• 39:18
  in
• 39:18
  their
• 39:18
  lives.
• 39:19
  Like,
• 39:19
  I
• 39:19
  can
• 39:19
  feel
• 39:20
  compassion
• 39:20
  for
• 39:20
  that.
• 39:21
  Mm.
• 39:22
  Because
• 39:22
  they
• 39:22
  don't
• 39:22
  even
• 39:22
  know.
• 39:23
  They
• 39:23
  don't
• 39:23
  even
• 39:23
  know-
• 39:24
  Yeah,
• 39:25
  it's-
• 39:25
  what
• 39:26
  that
• 39:26
  feels
• 39:26
  like
• 39:26
  to
• 39:26
  me,
• 39:26
  that's
• 39:27
  heartbreaking.
• 39:28
  Yeah.
• 39:28
  Like-
• 39:28
  They
• 39:28
  don't
• 39:28
  even
• 39:29
  know
• 39:29
  what
• 39:29
  that
• 39:29
  feels
• 39:29
  like
• 39:30
  that's
• 39:30
  Yeah.
• 39:30
  'Cause
• 39:30
  it's
• 39:30
  not
• 39:31
  like
• 39:31
  they
• 39:31
  could
• 39:31
  at
• 39:31
  one
• 39:31
  point.
• 39:33
  Right.
• 39:34
  Right.
• 39:35
  I
• 39:35
  mean,
• 39:35
  some
• 39:35
  might
• 39:35
  be
• 39:35
  able
• 39:36
  to,
• 39:36
  but-
• 39:36
  Maybe.
• 39:37
  Not
• 39:37
  But
• 39:37
  not-
• 39:37
  Yeah
• 39:38
  I,
• 39:38
  I
• 39:38
  think
• 39:38
  the
• 39:38
  majority,
• 39:38
  no
• 39:39
  most
• 39:39
  just
• 39:39
  in
• 39:39
  g-
• 39:39
  in
• 39:39
  general.
• 39:39
  Yeah.
• 39:40
  Yeah.
• 39:40
  The
• 39:41
  psychopaths
• 39:42
  are-
• 39:42
  Right.
• 39:42
  Yeah
• 39:43
  they
• 39:43
  don't
• 39:43
  have
• 39:43
  that
• 39:44
  I
• 39:45
  m-
• 39:45
  And
• 39:45
  I'm,
• 39:45
  I'm
• 39:45
  using
• 39:45
  that
• 39:46
  term
• 39:47
  scientifically,
• 39:48
  not,
• 39:49
  um,
• 39:49
  slangy.
• 39:50
  Right.
• 39:51
  Not
• 39:51
  like-
• 39:52
  Correct.
• 39:52
  Technically-
• 39:54
  Yeah
• 39:54
  psychopaths-
• 39:55
  Yeah
• 39:55
  don't
• 39:55
  have
• 39:56
  the
• 39:56
  same-
• 39:57
  Yeah,
• 39:57
  the
• 39:57
  anti-personality
• 39:58
  disorders.
• 39:59
  They
• 39:59
  don't-
• 39:59
  Yeah
• 39:59
  they
• 39:59
  don't
• 39:59
  feel.
• 40:00
  They're
• 40:00
  very
• 40:00
  in
• 40:00
  it.
• 40:00
  They
• 40:00
  feel.
• 40:01
  They
• 40:01
  don't
• 40:01
  feel
• 40:02
  Right.
• 40:02
  They
• 40:03
  feel
• 40:03
  about
• 40:03
  themselves.
• 40:04
  Right.
• 40:04
  They
• 40:04
  So
• 40:05
  to
• 40:05
  be
• 40:05
  fair,
• 40:05
  they
• 40:05
  do
• 40:05
  have
• 40:06
  those
• 40:06
  things
• 40:06
  about
• 40:06
  themselves.
• 40:07
  Right.
• 40:08
  They
• 40:08
  j-
• 40:08
  Like,
• 40:08
  they
• 40:08
  love
• 40:08
  themself.
• 40:09
  Mm-hmm.
• 40:10
  But
• 40:10
  how
• 40:11
  much
• 40:11
  richer
• 40:11
  is
• 40:12
  it
• 40:13
  to
• 40:13
  have
• 40:14
  that
• 40:14
  exchange
• 40:15
  back
• 40:15
  and
• 40:15
  forth
• 40:16
  with
• 40:16
  somebody
• 40:16
  else?
• 40:17
  Like-
• 40:18
  Yeah.
• 40:18
  Yeah,
• 40:18
  I
• 40:19
  know.
• 40:20
  It's,
• 40:22
  it's
• 40:22
  sad.
• 40:24
  So
• 40:25
  I
• 40:25
  had
• 40:25
  one
• 40:25
  more
• 40:25
  question,
• 40:26
  and
• 40:26
  I
• 40:26
  feel
• 40:26
  like
• 40:26
  we're
• 40:26
  getting
• 40:27
  to
• 40:27
  it
• 40:28
  because-
• 40:29
  Yeah,
• 40:29
  then
• 40:29
  we
• 40:29
  went...
• 40:30
  Yeah.
• 40:31
  Well,
• 40:32
  w-
• 40:32
  I
• 40:32
  was
• 40:32
  gonna
• 40:32
  say,
• 40:33
  like,
• 40:33
  what
• 40:33
  about
• 40:33
  compassion
• 40:34
  feels
• 40:34
  rebellious?
• 40:35
  But
• 40:35
  I
• 40:35
  feel
• 40:36
  like
• 40:36
  we
• 40:36
  kinda
• 40:36
  started
• 40:36
  talking
• 40:37
  about
• 40:37
  it
• 40:37
  a
• 40:37
  little
• 40:37
  bit-
• 40:37
  Yeah
• 40:37
  'cause
• 40:37
  I
• 40:38
  feel
• 40:38
  like
• 40:38
  the
• 40:38
  whole
• 40:38
  healing
• 40:38
  process,
• 40:39
  right?
• 40:40
  The
• 40:41
  healing
• 40:41
  process
• 40:42
  is,
• 40:42
  is
• 40:42
  definitely
• 40:43
  part
• 40:43
  of
• 40:43
  it.
• 40:44
  For
• 40:44
  me,
• 40:45
  I
• 40:45
  think
• 40:46
  we
• 40:46
  were
• 40:46
  also
• 40:47
  taught
• 40:47
  to
• 40:47
  be
• 40:47
  compassionate
• 40:48
  towards
• 40:48
  others,
• 40:49
  but
• 40:49
  not
• 40:49
  towards
• 40:49
  ourselves.
• 40:50
  Oh,
• 40:50
  absolutely.
• 40:51
  Like,
• 40:51
  uh,
• 40:51
  like
• 40:51
  the
• 40:52
  sort
• 40:52
  of
• 40:52
  perfectionism
• 40:53
  or,
• 40:53
  like,
• 40:53
  the,
• 40:54
  the
• 40:55
  hustle,
• 40:55
  the
• 40:55
  grind,
• 40:56
  the
• 40:56
  high
• 40:56
  standards
• 40:57
  was,
• 40:57
  like,
• 40:57
  glorified,
• 40:58
  right?
• 40:59
  Mm-hmm.
• 40:59
  So
• 40:59
  it's
• 40:59
  like,
• 41:00
  well,
• 41:00
  no,
• 41:00
  you're
• 41:00
  just
• 41:01
  n-
• 41:01
  you're
• 41:01
  never
• 41:01
  doing
• 41:01
  enough.
• 41:03
  It's
• 41:03
  not
• 41:03
  enough
• 41:04
  no
• 41:04
  matter
• 41:04
  how
• 41:04
  much
• 41:05
  it
• 41:05
  is,
• 41:05
  right?
• 41:06
  So
• 41:06
  it's
• 41:06
  hard.
• 41:07
  That's
• 41:07
  the
• 41:07
  unlearning
• 41:08
  for
• 41:08
  me,
• 41:09
  or,
• 41:09
  like,
• 41:09
  where,
• 41:11
  where,
• 41:11
  like,
• 41:11
  my
• 41:11
  healing
• 41:12
  needs
• 41:12
  to
• 41:12
  come
• 41:12
  into
• 41:12
  play
• 41:12
  because
• 41:13
  it's
• 41:13
  hard
• 41:14
  to
• 41:14
  unlearn
• 41:14
  those
• 41:14
  patterns
• 41:15
  and
• 41:15
  be
• 41:15
  compassionate
• 41:16
  with
• 41:16
  myself
• 41:16
  when
• 41:16
  there
• 41:16
  are
• 41:17
  so
• 41:17
  many
• 41:17
  times
• 41:17
  I've
• 41:17
  told
• 41:18
  myself
• 41:19
  that
• 41:19
  what
• 41:19
  I
• 41:19
  did
• 41:20
  today
• 41:20
  was
• 41:21
  not
• 41:21
  enough
• 41:21
  because
• 41:22
  I
• 41:22
  didn't
• 41:22
  complete
• 41:23
  the
• 41:24
  unrealistic
• 41:25
  to-do
• 41:25
  list-
• 41:26
  Yeah
• 41:26
  that
• 41:26
  I
• 41:26
  created.
• 41:27
  1,000
• 41:27
  tasks
• 41:27
  on
• 41:27
  my
• 41:28
  list
• 41:28
  today.
• 41:28
  Right.
• 41:28
  Yeah.
• 41:29
  It's
• 41:29
  like
• 41:29
  I
• 41:29
  operate
• 41:30
  every
• 41:30
  single
• 41:30
  day
• 41:31
  as
• 41:31
  though
• 41:31
  I'm,
• 41:31
  like,
• 41:31
  Hermione
• 41:32
  with
• 41:32
  a
• 41:32
  time
• 41:32
  turner
• 41:33
  and
• 41:33
  I
• 41:33
  can
• 41:33
  just,
• 41:33
  like,
• 41:33
  gain
• 41:34
  five
• 41:34
  hours
• 41:35
  and
• 41:35
  redo
• 41:35
  the
• 41:36
  whole
• 41:36
  day-
• 41:36
  and
• 41:36
  it's
• 41:37
  not
• 41:37
  how
• 41:38
  the
• 41:38
  world
• 41:38
  works.
• 41:40
  I
• 41:40
  think
• 41:40
  the
• 41:40
  other
• 41:40
  piece
• 41:41
  for
• 41:41
  me
• 41:41
  that
• 41:41
  feels
• 41:42
  so
• 41:42
  rebellious...
• 41:44
  Sorry,
• 41:44
  I'm
• 41:44
  just
• 41:44
  picturing
• 41:45
  Erica
• 41:45
  like...
• 41:46
  Three
• 41:47
  turns,
• 41:47
  and
• 41:48
  then
• 41:48
  I'm
• 41:48
  gonna
• 41:48
  go
• 41:49
  back
• 41:49
  to
• 41:49
  the
• 41:49
  top
• 41:49
  of
• 41:49
  my
• 41:50
  to-do
• 41:50
  list.
• 41:51
  Um,
• 41:51
  let
• 41:52
  me
• 41:52
  just
• 41:52
  get
• 41:52
  through
• 41:52
  these
• 41:52
  five
• 41:53
  meetings
• 41:53
  in
• 41:53
  a
• 41:53
  row,
• 41:54
  and
• 41:54
  then
• 41:54
  I'm
• 41:54
  gonna
• 41:55
  turn,
• 41:55
  turn,
• 41:55
  turn
• 41:56
  and
• 41:56
  get
• 41:56
  some
• 41:56
  real
• 41:56
  work
• 41:57
  done
• 41:57
  for
• 41:57
  once.
• 41:58
  Ugh.
• 41:59
  Yeah,
• 41:59
  no.
• 42:00
  Um,
• 42:01
  so-
• 42:01
  What
• 42:01
  a
• 42:01
  fucking
• 42:02
  nightmare,
• 42:02
  by
• 42:02
  the
• 42:02
  way.
• 42:03
  The
• 42:03
  part-
• 42:03
  Continue.
• 42:05
  The
• 42:05
  part
• 42:05
  that
• 42:05
  feels
• 42:06
  rebellious
• 42:07
  is
• 42:07
  exactly,
• 42:07
  like-
• 42:08
  Right
• 42:08
  the,
• 42:08
  the
• 42:09
  societal
• 42:10
  divide,
• 42:11
  like,
• 42:11
  the
• 42:11
  divisiveness
• 42:12
  right
• 42:12
  now.
• 42:12
  Yes.
• 42:12
  Mm.
• 42:13
  And
• 42:13
  it's
• 42:13
  how
• 42:14
  difficult
• 42:14
  it
• 42:15
  is
• 42:15
  to
• 42:16
  have
• 42:16
  compassion
• 42:16
  for
• 42:17
  people
• 42:17
  on
• 42:17
  the
• 42:17
  other
• 42:17
  side
• 42:19
  of
• 42:19
  what's
• 42:20
  becoming,
• 42:20
  like,
• 42:20
  very
• 42:21
  prominent,
• 42:21
  like,
• 42:21
  moral
• 42:22
  and
• 42:22
  ethical
• 42:23
  dilemmas.
• 42:24
  Yeah.
• 42:25
  Right?
• 42:25
  It's
• 42:26
  d-
• 42:26
  it's
• 42:26
  becoming
• 42:27
  very
• 42:27
  difficult,
• 42:27
  and
• 42:27
  it's
• 42:28
  kind
• 42:28
  of...
• 42:28
  It's
• 42:29
  the
• 42:29
  cause
• 42:29
  of
• 42:29
  the
• 42:29
  divide.
• 42:30
  It's
• 42:30
  our
• 42:30
  inability
• 42:30
  to
• 42:31
  see
• 42:31
  the
• 42:31
  humanity
• 42:31
  in
• 42:31
  each
• 42:32
  other
• 42:32
  anymore.
• 42:33
  Yep.
• 42:34
  Yeah,
• 42:35
  I
• 42:35
  feel
• 42:35
  like-
• 42:35
  That's
• 42:35
  what
• 42:35
  feels
• 42:35
  rebellious
• 42:36
  right
• 42:36
  now.
• 42:37
  Yeah.
• 42:37
  And
• 42:38
  to
• 42:38
  add
• 42:38
  to
• 42:38
  that
• 42:38
  too,
• 42:38
  I
• 42:38
  feel
• 42:39
  like
• 42:39
  people
• 42:41
  feel
• 42:41
  like
• 42:42
  they're
• 42:42
  entitled
• 42:43
  to
• 42:45
  not
• 42:46
  be
• 42:46
  compassionate
• 42:46
  towards
• 42:47
  those
• 42:47
  people
• 42:47
  because
• 42:48
  of
• 42:49
  how
• 42:50
  they
• 42:50
  saw
• 42:50
  something.
• 42:51
  And
• 42:51
  I
• 42:51
  feel
• 42:51
  like,
• 42:52
  but
• 42:52
  doesn't
• 42:52
  that
• 42:52
  just
• 42:52
  keep
• 42:52
  us
• 42:53
  in
• 42:53
  the
• 42:53
  same-
• 42:54
  Yes
• 42:54
  place?
• 42:55
  Like,
• 42:55
  doesn't
• 42:56
  that
• 42:56
  just...
• 42:56
  Now,
• 42:56
  now,
• 42:56
  now
• 42:57
  you're
• 42:57
  the
• 42:57
  one
• 42:57
  doing
• 42:58
  it.
• 42:58
  Exactly.
• 42:59
  And
• 42:59
  also,
• 42:59
  having
• 43:00
  compassion
• 43:00
  for
• 43:00
  someone,
• 43:01
  again,
• 43:01
  like
• 43:01
  we
• 43:01
  said
• 43:02
  earlier,
• 43:03
  doesn't
• 43:03
  mean
• 43:03
  letting
• 43:03
  them
• 43:03
  off
• 43:04
  the
• 43:04
  hook.
• 43:05
  Right.
• 43:06
  Mm-hmm.
• 43:07
  But
• 43:07
  didn't
• 43:07
  we
• 43:07
  want
• 43:08
  them,
• 43:09
  you
• 43:09
  know?
• 43:09
  Like,
• 43:09
  didn't
• 43:09
  we
• 43:09
  want
• 43:10
  people
• 43:10
  to
• 43:10
  see-
• 43:11
  Change
• 43:11
  their
• 43:11
  mind,
• 43:12
  yeah.
• 43:12
  Yeah
• 43:12
  think
• 43:12
  differently.
• 43:13
  So,
• 43:13
  like,
• 43:13
  they
• 43:13
  are.
• 43:14
  Maybe
• 43:14
  not
• 43:14
  when
• 43:14
  you
• 43:14
  wanted
• 43:15
  it
• 43:15
  to
• 43:15
  happen,
• 43:16
  but
• 43:16
  they
• 43:16
  did,
• 43:17
  so
• 43:18
  we
• 43:18
  can
• 43:18
  have
• 43:18
  compassion
• 43:19
  for,
• 43:20
  for
• 43:20
  that
• 43:20
  and
• 43:20
  whatever
• 43:21
  it
• 43:21
  is
• 43:21
  that
• 43:21
  they
• 43:21
  went
• 43:21
  through,
• 43:22
  and
• 43:22
  then
• 43:23
  be
• 43:23
  willing
• 43:24
  to
• 43:24
  help,
• 43:24
  but
• 43:24
  also,
• 43:25
  you
• 43:25
  know,
• 43:26
  as
• 43:26
  long
• 43:26
  as
• 43:27
  they're
• 43:27
  willing
• 43:27
  to
• 43:28
  take
• 43:28
  accountability
• 43:28
  for
• 43:29
  their
• 43:29
  part.
• 43:29
  Not
• 43:29
  just
• 43:30
  like-
• 43:30
  Mm
• 43:30
  "Oh,
• 43:30
  we're
• 43:30
  done.
• 43:30
  Nope,
• 43:31
  don't
• 43:31
  worry."
• 43:31
  No,
• 43:31
  you
• 43:31
  have
• 43:32
  to
• 43:32
  take
• 43:32
  accountability
• 43:32
  for
• 43:32
  your
• 43:32
  part.
• 43:34
  So-
• 43:36
  Yeah
• 43:36
  that's
• 43:36
  rebellion,
• 43:37
  yeah.
• 43:38
  Yeah.
• 43:38
  I
• 43:39
  would
• 43:39
  just
• 43:39
  say
• 43:39
  the
• 43:40
  same.
• 43:40
  I
• 43:40
  think,
• 43:41
  um,
• 43:43
  judgment
• 43:44
  is
• 43:44
  mainstream,
• 43:45
  man.
• 43:46
  Everybody's
• 43:47
  offended
• 43:48
  by
• 43:48
  everything
• 43:50
  and
• 43:50
  judging
• 43:51
  every
• 43:51
  single
• 43:52
  person
• 43:52
  they
• 43:53
  see.
• 43:53
  It
• 43:53
  is
• 43:54
  like
• 43:56
  hip-
• 43:56
  Mm
• 43:56
  to
• 43:56
  be
• 43:57
  judgmental
• 43:58
  and-
• 43:58
  Fast
• 43:59
  and
• 43:59
  cheap
• 43:59
  offended-
• 44:01
  Judg-
• 44:01
  about-
• 44:01
  Judgment
• 44:01
  is
• 44:02
  fast
• 44:02
  and
• 44:02
  cheap
• 44:03
  every
• 44:03
  fucking
• 44:04
  thing.
• 44:04
  And
• 44:04
  the
• 44:04
  thing
• 44:05
  is,
• 44:05
  we
• 44:05
  all
• 44:05
  want
• 44:05
  the
• 44:06
  same
• 44:06
  thing.
• 44:06
  The,
• 44:07
  even,
• 44:07
  we're
• 44:07
  not
• 44:07
  seeing
• 44:08
  eye
• 44:08
  to
• 44:08
  eye
• 44:09
  because
• 44:09
  we're
• 44:09
  thinking
• 44:10
  about
• 44:10
  it
• 44:10
  differently,
• 44:11
  because
• 44:11
  we
• 44:11
  have
• 44:11
  different
• 44:11
  beliefs,
• 44:12
  but
• 44:12
  we
• 44:12
  want
• 44:12
  the
• 44:12
  same
• 44:13
  thing.
• 44:13
  And
• 44:13
  if
• 44:15
  everybody,
• 44:16
  both
• 44:16
  sides,
• 44:16
  understood
• 44:18
  that
• 44:19
  actually
• 44:20
  coming
• 44:20
  together
• 44:20
  and
• 44:20
  having
• 44:21
  compassion
• 44:21
  and
• 44:21
  trying
• 44:22
  to
• 44:22
  understand
• 44:22
  each
• 44:22
  other
• 44:23
  is
• 44:24
  the
• 44:24
  biggest
• 44:25
  fucking
• 44:25
  rebellion
• 44:26
  of
• 44:26
  all-
• 44:27
  Fuck
• 44:27
  yeah
• 44:28
  and
• 44:28
  that
• 44:28
  we
• 44:29
  will,
• 44:29
  that
• 44:29
  if
• 44:29
  we
• 44:30
  do
• 44:30
  that,
• 44:30
  we
• 44:30
  actually
• 44:31
  get
• 44:31
  what
• 44:31
  we
• 44:31
  all
• 44:31
  want.
• 44:32
  Yeah.
• 44:32
  And
• 44:32
  still
• 44:32
  can
• 44:33
  keep
• 44:33
  your
• 44:33
  beliefs
• 44:34
  and
• 44:34
  however
• 44:34
  you
• 44:34
  wanna
• 44:35
  do
• 44:35
  things.
• 44:36
  You
• 44:37
  know?
• 44:37
  It
• 44:37
  doesn't
• 44:37
  have
• 44:38
  to
• 44:38
  be
• 44:38
  one
• 44:38
  way
• 44:38
  or
• 44:38
  the
• 44:38
  other.
• 44:38
  It
• 44:38
  doesn't
• 44:39
  have
• 44:39
  to
• 44:39
  be
• 44:39
  your
• 44:39
  way
• 44:39
  or
• 44:39
  my
• 44:40
  way.
• 44:41
  It
• 44:41
  can
• 44:41
  be
• 44:42
  both.
• 44:43
  Mm.
• 44:44
  Yeah.
• 44:45
  We
• 44:45
  need
• 44:46
  to
• 44:46
  continue
• 44:46
  rebelling
• 44:48
  with
• 44:48
  kindness.
• 44:50
  Hell
• 44:50
  yeah.
• 44:51
  Fierce
• 44:51
  kindness.
• 44:52
  Yeah.
• 44:53
  Definitely.
• 44:55
  Anything
• 44:55
  else
• 44:56
  you
• 44:56
  guys
• 44:56
  wanna
• 44:56
  add?
• 44:57
  Again,
• 44:58
  listen
• 44:59
  I
• 44:59
  thought
• 44:59
  you
• 44:59
  might've
• 45:00
  had
• 45:00
  something,
• 45:00
  'cause
• 45:00
  you're
• 45:00
  like...
• 45:02
  All
• 45:02
  righty.
• 45:03
  No.
• 45:04
  Excellent.
• 45:05
  But
• 45:05
  this
• 45:05
  was
• 45:06
  an
• 45:06
  awesome
• 45:06
  conversation
• 45:07
  yet
• 45:07
  again
• 45:09
  Are
• 45:09
  you
• 45:09
  getting
• 45:09
  the...
• 45:10
  Ready?
• 45:12
  All
• 45:12
  righty.
• 45:12
  We'll
• 45:12
  see
• 45:12
  you
• 45:12
  guys.
• 45:12
  Thanks
• 45:13
  everybody.
• 45:13
  Love
• 45:13
  ya.
• 45:14
  See
• 45:15
  you
• 45:15
  guys
• 45:15
  next
• 45:15
  time.
• 45:16
  Bye.
• 45:18
  Bye.