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Blessed by Family · Mom Wars

• 0:01
  Speaker 1: From the front lines of The Mom Wars. Here's Bethany
• 0:04
  Speaker 1: Mandel and Kara Kennedy.
• 0:08
  Speaker 2: Hello and welcome to yet another episode of The Mom Wars.
• 0:13
  Speaker 2: I've heard that a pot you know, a podcast is
• 0:16
  Speaker 2: going to last when it makes it past five episodes,
• 0:19
  Speaker 2: so I feel like this is where we're hitting our
• 0:21
  Speaker 2: stride because a lot of people flame out around the
• 0:24
  Speaker 2: five episode mark, so I think that I think that
• 0:26
  Speaker 2: we're in good shape. My name is Bethany Mandel. I
• 0:30
  Speaker 2: am a mother of six living in the outskirts of Washington,
• 0:34
  Speaker 2: d C. The swamp. My oldest is eleven and my
• 0:38
  Speaker 2: youngest is two. Car I'll jump it, I'll kick it
• 0:41
  Speaker 2: over to you.
• 0:42
  Speaker 3: I'm car Kennedy. I am a mom of one.
• 0:45
  Speaker 2: The six month old, and I don't know how anybody
• 0:48
  Speaker 2: has ulan one, but we'll see.
• 0:50
  Speaker 4: That you will.
• 0:51
  Speaker 2: And speaking of which, I am so excited to introduce
• 0:55
  Speaker 2: our guest this week. For everyone. This is going to
• 0:58
  Speaker 2: get all the old Twitter listeners viewers.
• 1:01
  Speaker 1: You know.
• 1:01
  Speaker 2: I'm talking about all the old Twitter users to the
• 1:03
  Speaker 2: yard because Evan has been lurking on the internet for
• 1:07
  Speaker 2: many years and everyone who used og Twitter knows Evan
• 1:12
  Speaker 2: from Israel. Evan, introduce yourself to our audience.
• 1:16
  Speaker 1: Hi, my name is Evan Poproy. I live in a
• 1:19
  Speaker 1: town called beate El outside of Jerusalem. I have nine kids.
• 1:23
  Speaker 1: My oldest is thirty one, my youngest is twelve, and
• 1:26
  Speaker 1: I have five grandchildren. And yeah, I met Bethany and
• 1:31
  Speaker 1: Seth on Twitter, must be almost fifteen years ago. Yeah,
• 1:37
  Speaker 1: they came to visit Israel and got the hang out
• 1:39
  Speaker 1: at my house and I went off live for a while,
• 1:43
  Speaker 1: and yeah, I've been looking on Twitter for for a
• 1:45
  Speaker 1: little bit and back up with Bethany and it's it's tell.
• 1:49
  Speaker 2: So let me explain the significance of you. I think
• 1:54
  Speaker 2: you know this story, right, like the significance of you
• 1:57
  Speaker 2: and your wife in our life. So we visited you
• 2:00
  Speaker 2: in Betel fifteen years ago. We were just dating and
• 2:04
  Speaker 2: like not like we were. We knew we were gonna
• 2:07
  Speaker 2: get married, but we were just dating, and we had
• 2:11
  Speaker 2: never talked about kids. I don't know if I hadn't
• 2:13
  Speaker 2: really thought about it. I think I at that point
• 2:16
  Speaker 2: thought I wanted them, but I don't I never put
• 2:18
  Speaker 2: any thought whatsoever into it. And we showed up the
• 2:22
  Speaker 2: night of the birthday of one of your children. At
• 2:25
  Speaker 2: that point you had six.
• 2:29
  Speaker 1: Yeah, yeah, because I had a little bit of internet
• 2:34
  Speaker 1: fame because my young my second the youngest, used to
• 2:38
  Speaker 1: sleep in the weirdest places, and I ran a whole
• 2:42
  Speaker 1: blog of the strange places that he fell asleep on
• 2:46
  Speaker 1: the table, under the table in the middle of the hallway.
• 2:50
  Speaker 1: He would go to sleep in one place and it
• 2:52
  Speaker 1: would wake up in the morning and he'd be in
• 2:55
  Speaker 1: a different room. Or yeah, just.
• 2:57
  Speaker 3: Wait, how old was he at this point?
• 3:00
  Speaker 1: When he was one? And he just is, yeah, he's
• 3:04
  Speaker 1: in high school, and uh, yeah, he's fifteen.
• 3:08
  Speaker 2: Now does he still do that? No, So anyway, so
• 3:13
  Speaker 2: let me let me finish. So we came to your
• 3:15
  Speaker 2: house someone's birthday and it was April time, and we
• 3:25
  Speaker 2: saw how your kids lifted him. I think I think
• 3:30
  Speaker 2: it was a I think it was a boy in
• 3:32
  Speaker 2: the chair, singing and dancing, and like everyone had made
• 3:36
  Speaker 2: a gift, everyone had done something for their sibling. And
• 3:39
  Speaker 2: we just sat there and no words were exchanged. We
• 3:43
  Speaker 2: looked at each other and we were like, that's what
• 3:45
  Speaker 2: we want, that's what we want. And I had never
• 3:48
  Speaker 2: thought about having a big family. I never wanted to
• 3:52
  Speaker 2: have a big family. I was like an only child
• 3:53
  Speaker 2: and very mostly content with it. But we looked at
• 3:58
  Speaker 2: each other and we were like, yep, that's it.
• 4:00
  Speaker 4: Wait, how long did it?
• 4:02
  Speaker 3: How long were you guys together before you got married.
• 4:04
  Speaker 2: That's a little bit of a complicated story that I'll
• 4:07
  Speaker 2: tell off the pod for knowledge time for another time.
• 4:10
  Speaker 2: Never on the pod.
• 4:12
  Speaker 1: My wife and I dated for six weeks.
• 4:14
  Speaker 3: I okay, so I'm full months. So six weeks me.
• 4:20
  Speaker 2: I had to I had to convert because my mom
• 4:22
  Speaker 2: wasn't Jewish, so I had to convert before. But I
• 4:25
  Speaker 2: knew I was going to marry that man instantly, like
• 4:30
  Speaker 2: wisping a day.
• 4:31
  Speaker 1: Look. The truth is I would have asked my wife
• 4:33
  Speaker 1: to marry me after the first date, but she wasn't ready,
• 4:36
  Speaker 1: so it took me six weeks to convince her.
• 4:39
  Speaker 2: Six weeks.
• 4:39
  Speaker 4: That's not bad.
• 4:40
  Speaker 3: That's not bad.
• 4:43
  Speaker 1: And we were married for almost thirty years. She passed
• 4:47
  Speaker 1: away from cancer at the end of twenty twenty three.
• 4:50
  Speaker 1: Oh sorry, so a little bit before our thirtieth anniversary.
• 4:53
  Speaker 1: So I am a single father at this point.
• 4:56
  Speaker 2: Eight So how many of you of your children still
• 5:00
  Speaker 2: at home with you?
• 5:01
  Speaker 1: Officially? My four youngest live at home, so I have
• 5:03
  Speaker 1: a a twenty two year old who's he's in hes there,
• 5:07
  Speaker 1: which is he goes in he's partially in the Israeli
• 5:10
  Speaker 1: Army and partially in Yeshiva learning, so he's at the
• 5:15
  Speaker 1: end of his service that's like another year. So he
• 5:20
  Speaker 1: officially lives at home, but he's out of the house
• 5:24
  Speaker 1: most of the time in school or in the army.
• 5:27
  Speaker 1: And then I have two sons who are in high
• 5:30
  Speaker 1: school and they dorm. It's very common for people in
• 5:34
  Speaker 1: our community for the boys to go away to dorm
• 5:39
  Speaker 1: school during the week and then they're home verst a.
• 5:40
  Speaker 1: But and then my youngest who's in seventh grade, so
• 5:44
  Speaker 1: he's the he's really the only one who's home all
• 5:46
  Speaker 1: the time. But yeah, officially there are four me and
• 5:51
  Speaker 1: four boys live live in house.
• 5:53
  Speaker 3: How old we started having kids, because you do not
• 5:56
  Speaker 3: look all of that to grandchildren, I said.
• 5:58
  Speaker 1: I got married at twenty one, and I think our oldest, Yeah,
• 6:04
  Speaker 1: our oldest was born right after my twenty second birthday,
• 6:09
  Speaker 1: and then fifteen months later we had identical twin girls.
• 6:13
  Speaker 1: So so for about nine months we had Irish triplets.
• 6:19
  Speaker 1: I think you would call it in Hebrew, it's the
• 6:24
  Speaker 1: term is slicia sul bet, which means second rate triplets.
• 6:30
  Speaker 2: So when did you move to Israel.
• 6:32
  Speaker 1: So I came to Israel right after high school. I
• 6:36
  Speaker 1: was here for two years. I went back to Yeshiva
• 6:40
  Speaker 1: University for a year. I'm originally I grew up in Rita, Nevada,
• 6:44
  Speaker 1: so I'm from the West Coast and I hate New York.
• 6:46
  Speaker 2: I really, really really don't like New York.
• 6:49
  Speaker 1: I am not. My wife is from Brooklyn. So I
• 6:51
  Speaker 1: spent a year in New York and it was not
• 6:53
  Speaker 1: for me, and I came back to Israel after that
• 6:57
  Speaker 1: when I was twenty and started dating myfe I like.
• 7:01
  Speaker 2: So it's a bit of a story, but we're here
• 7:05
  Speaker 2: for it.
• 7:06
  Speaker 1: Needless to say, I actually met Elishava, the woman I married,
• 7:11
  Speaker 1: the summer I came back from two years in Israel.
• 7:15
  Speaker 1: I was a counselor in summer camp and her brother
• 7:19
  Speaker 1: was one of my campers, and so she came up
• 7:23
  Speaker 1: for visiting day. She was already living in Israel. She
• 7:25
  Speaker 1: also she she came to Israel after high school. She
• 7:31
  Speaker 1: was here for her a year. She went back to
• 7:33
  Speaker 1: America for a year. She didn't like living back in America.
• 7:36
  Speaker 1: She knew she wanted to make Aliyah, and she had
• 7:38
  Speaker 1: moved back to Israel. She came back to visit her
• 7:40
  Speaker 1: family for over the summer. We met over the summer.
• 7:45
  Speaker 1: Then she came back to Israel, and I already knew, like, okay,
• 7:48
  Speaker 1: this is somebody I'm interested in. I landed in Israel,
• 7:53
  Speaker 1: I put my stuff down. I called her after I
• 7:55
  Speaker 1: put my luggage down, first thing as I called her,
• 7:58
  Speaker 1: and we went out that night and named six weeks
• 8:01
  Speaker 1: later happens we got engaged on my twenty first birthday.
• 8:03
  Speaker 2: Are you are your family religious back in Reno? No?
• 8:06
  Speaker 2: Ho can you tell them I met a girl and
• 8:09
  Speaker 2: I'm engaged in six weeks?
• 8:12
  Speaker 1: So that's that's also a story. And I don't want
• 8:14
  Speaker 1: to speak ill about my mother's is My mother didn't
• 8:18
  Speaker 1: take it very well. So they were actually visiting Israel.
• 8:20
  Speaker 1: They had come to visit Israel for this for for
• 8:23
  Speaker 1: a couple of weeks in the summer, and I called
• 8:26
  Speaker 1: my mother. I said, Mom, I'm engaged, and her response
• 8:31
  Speaker 1: was we'll talk about it, and I said, no, there's
• 8:36
  Speaker 1: nothing to talk about. Where And my grandmother, while I
• 8:40
  Speaker 1: was Selham was was was with them, and my mother
• 8:44
  Speaker 1: was like and she also met and I recently met.
• 8:49
  Speaker 1: I brought my wife to meet them, and my mother
• 8:54
  Speaker 1: was like, yeah, okay, he met somebody. It'll pass. And
• 8:59
  Speaker 1: my grandmother already knew. My grandmother said, no, you didn't
• 9:01
  Speaker 1: see the way he looked at her this they're gonna
• 9:04
  Speaker 1: get married. So my grandmother knew in advance.
• 9:06
  Speaker 2: How many siblings do you have? You're one of what?
• 9:09
  Speaker 1: I'm one of three. I have an older sister who's
• 9:12
  Speaker 1: a year older than me, and I have a sister's
• 9:14
  Speaker 1: ten years younger than me. Wow, and they live. They
• 9:18
  Speaker 1: live in California, and my older sister has three daughters,
• 9:20
  Speaker 1: and my older sister's not married.
• 9:23
  Speaker 2: So they must think that you're a totally normal person
• 9:26
  Speaker 2: having had completely they many number you've had, So I
• 9:32
  Speaker 2: joke with my in laws, but it's not a joke.
• 9:34
  Speaker 2: I'm very competitive person. I know that's surprising that I
• 9:39
  Speaker 2: gave birth to half of their grandchildren. They have twelve grandchildren,
• 9:42
  Speaker 2: and I alone am responsible for.
• 9:44
  Speaker 1: Half of that.
• 9:45
  Speaker 2: So you you, I respond about three quarters of my
• 9:48
  Speaker 2: parents grandchildren my in laws together.
• 9:50
  Speaker 1: My in laws. On the other hand, my wife, Laslam
• 9:54
  Speaker 1: has three siblings and her she has a younger sister
• 9:59
  Speaker 1: who lives here in Israel, who has eleven kids.
• 10:02
  Speaker 4: Wow.
• 10:03
  Speaker 1: And her oldest grandchild is older than her youngest son.
• 10:08
  Speaker 2: So she had a grandchild and then she had a baby.
• 10:11
  Speaker 1: Yeah yeah.
• 10:14
  Speaker 2: And in the modern in the modern Orthodox world, the
• 10:17
  Speaker 2: thing that people say is, I don't want to be
• 10:19
  Speaker 2: pregnant at a bar or bought bensla. Yeah yeah, And
• 10:24
  Speaker 2: now I get it. I'm like, I don't want to
• 10:25
  Speaker 2: I'm done.
• 10:26
  Speaker 1: Now my daughter is not.
• 10:28
  Speaker 2: It's been next year, and I'm like, no, big work.
• 10:31
  Speaker 3: Was it something that you decided on in advance that
• 10:34
  Speaker 3: you would have a lot of children or did it
• 10:35
  Speaker 3: just kind.
• 10:36
  Speaker 1: Of yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. I think I think when
• 10:39
  Speaker 1: we started we were talking about like somewhere between eight
• 10:42
  Speaker 1: and ten.
• 10:43
  Speaker 4: Wow.
• 10:44
  Speaker 2: And so what did your family think about, like once
• 10:46
  Speaker 2: you've hit that like abnormal number, like four?
• 10:49
  Speaker 1: So okay, So my father's a pediatrician, he's actually a neonatologist,
• 10:53
  Speaker 1: so he takes her premature babies. So he was already
• 10:57
  Speaker 1: like at four, okay, that's a lot of kids. And
• 10:59
  Speaker 1: at five okay, slow yer old, slow yer old. And
• 11:04
  Speaker 1: then I think after after our fifth my wife said, okay,
• 11:08
  Speaker 1: it's enough with hospitals. We're gonna start giving birth at home,
• 11:11
  Speaker 1: and so three of the four youngest were born at
• 11:15
  Speaker 1: home and my father was very not into that. He
• 11:19
  Speaker 1: was like, no, you go to the hospital. So we
• 11:21
  Speaker 1: like said, no, we're not. That was fun, but no,
• 11:23
  Speaker 1: I think after once we had are sick, my parents
• 11:26
  Speaker 1: were like, oh, wonderful, like more grand kids. They can
• 11:29
  Speaker 1: now tell all the friends that they have great grandkids,
• 11:32
  Speaker 1: and like they have friends who have like one or
• 11:34
  Speaker 1: two grandkids and they have five great grandkids, so they're
• 11:38
  Speaker 1: maybe they're happy.
• 11:40
  Speaker 2: My in law is when we told them that we
• 11:42
  Speaker 2: were pregnant with our sixth they just laughed. There wasn't
• 11:45
  Speaker 2: even a they just laughed, right Seth. Seth said mom, Dad,
• 11:50
  Speaker 2: I have to tell you something, and he looked at
• 11:51
  Speaker 2: me and he just laughed. My father in loved. He
• 11:53
  Speaker 2: was like, seriously, what is there ugedy people? But I
• 11:58
  Speaker 2: my my in laws are all like me, very medical
• 12:00
  Speaker 2: people also, and everyone it's just a don't esque, don't tell,
• 12:04
  Speaker 2: like why is bethany where? Why are these pictures staged
• 12:07
  Speaker 2: in her bed? Like no one no one asks, no
• 12:09
  Speaker 2: one says anything.
• 12:10
  Speaker 1: It's just and then we our community like six seven,
• 12:16
  Speaker 1: eight kids is like not so but.
• 12:19
  Speaker 2: Is homebreth normal in your community, because like, no, no, okay,
• 12:23
  Speaker 2: yeah it's not here either. We had half of ours
• 12:25
  Speaker 2: at home and it's not abnormal, but it's not normal
• 12:29
  Speaker 2: in England.
• 12:29
  Speaker 1: It's very common really yeah yeah, yeah. At some point
• 12:33
  Speaker 1: the NHS was okay, we're gonna actually encourage women to
• 12:38
  Speaker 1: give birth at home. That doesn't surprise so much less
• 12:43
  Speaker 1: for the system and as long as and certainly after
• 12:46
  Speaker 1: the first birth statistics. So I did a lot of
• 12:49
  Speaker 1: research into it so I could like have this conversation
• 12:51
  Speaker 1: with my father and I read all the medical journals
• 12:54
  Speaker 1: and for second children, like two, three four, it's actually
• 13:00
  Speaker 1: much safer to have birth at home than in the
• 13:03
  Speaker 1: hospital statistically because the women are more calm, there's a
• 13:07
  Speaker 1: lot less complications, there's a lot less unnecessarily medical intervention.
• 13:12
  Speaker 1: So if it if it's a low risk pregnancy in general,
• 13:16
  Speaker 1: then it seems to be that a home birth statistically
• 13:21
  Speaker 1: and it's small numbers difference, but it's uh, And they
• 13:25
  Speaker 1: just said that statistically turns out better.
• 13:28
  Speaker 3: Was there a specifically then that you guys chose to
• 13:32
  Speaker 3: go with her?
• 13:32
  Speaker 1: Butts my wife wanted to. I wasn't my idea like this.
• 13:37
  Speaker 1: This is one of the things that was like, whatever
• 13:39
  Speaker 1: you want, I'm.
• 13:40
  Speaker 2: Not because I know Bethany's reason was kind of an accident,
• 13:45
  Speaker 2: right recane sort of. So our third was born on
• 13:48
  Speaker 2: the side of the road, and so yeah, Ultima, that's
• 13:52
  Speaker 2: what he's known as. So he so we were told
• 13:55
  Speaker 2: so that was still in New Jersey, and we were
• 13:57
  Speaker 2: told that birth was so and our second was honestly
• 14:00
  Speaker 2: really fast too. So I showed up at the hospital
• 14:02
  Speaker 2: and I actually just wrote about this for our sub
• 14:04
  Speaker 2: steck a couple days ago. I had shown up at
• 14:07
  Speaker 2: the hospital with our second, annoyed that they made me
• 14:11
  Speaker 2: come to the hospital. I was exactly a week late,
• 14:13
  Speaker 2: and they were like, we want to do the stress
• 14:15
  Speaker 2: tests or whatever, and we don't have any beds where,
• 14:18
  Speaker 2: we don't have any appointments in the office, so you
• 14:20
  Speaker 2: have to come to the hospital. And I was having
• 14:22
  Speaker 2: like some cramping or whatever. I didn't think I was
• 14:25
  Speaker 2: in labor, and they made me come into the hospital
• 14:27
  Speaker 2: and I was super pissed, and I told Seth he
• 14:30
  Speaker 2: had to take the day off, and he was pissed
• 14:32
  Speaker 2: at me in turn, because he was going to lose
• 14:34
  Speaker 2: a day of his paternity leave. For nothing, for no reason.
• 14:37
  Speaker 2: And I said, I'm not going to the hospital alone.
• 14:39
  Speaker 2: I don't care. Take the day off, you have sick days, whatever,
• 14:42
  Speaker 2: whatever you're using, just to use it and come with me.
• 14:44
  Speaker 2: And so we show up when we park and everything,
• 14:47
  Speaker 2: and they put the monitor on me and they were like,
• 14:48
  Speaker 2: you're in labor, and I was like, that's incorrect. And
• 14:52
  Speaker 2: so we're arguing. We're arguing, and I'm like, I want
• 14:54
  Speaker 2: to go home. I want to go home. My sister
• 14:55
  Speaker 2: in law was watching my baby. I don't have a
• 14:57
  Speaker 2: lot of time, like everyone's fine, we're fine. I want
• 15:01
  Speaker 2: to go home. And as as I'm arguing with my midwife,
• 15:04
  Speaker 2: my water breaks and he was born ninety minutes later.
• 15:09
  Speaker 2: And so that was number two. Number three was born
• 15:12
  Speaker 2: in maybe half an hour, forty five minutes, we don't
• 15:15
  Speaker 2: even know. And so after him, my midwife said, like,
• 15:19
  Speaker 2: you've now had two precipitous births. They have in duration.
• 15:24
  Speaker 2: One was ninety minutes, whe was forty minutes. Let's be generous,
• 15:27
  Speaker 2: say forty minutes. You can't have another baby like this.
• 15:31
  Speaker 2: You either have to get induced or you have to
• 15:33
  Speaker 2: have the baby at home. You can't get in another
• 15:35
  Speaker 2: car and wait for spontaneous labor. So I was like, well,
• 15:40
  Speaker 2: punt like pumping myself with potocin when I don't know
• 15:44
  Speaker 2: when my baby's ready or at home, I'm basically do
• 15:49
  Speaker 2: like I never had an ID. I never had anything
• 15:51
  Speaker 2: with the first three kids. Obviously on the side of
• 15:53
  Speaker 2: the road. I never raised it, but I was like,
• 15:56
  Speaker 2: I know I can do it because I've done it
• 15:57
  Speaker 2: three times, and I don't want to pump myself through
• 16:00
  Speaker 2: full of hormones to push myself to go into labor,
• 16:04
  Speaker 2: right And so four, five, and six were born at home,
• 16:06
  Speaker 2: and I was a fan. I gave I'm like sitting
• 16:09
  Speaker 2: in my bedroom right now, I give birth number five
• 16:11
  Speaker 2: right there, number six in my bed and it was
• 16:14
  Speaker 2: really nice and I could like just be in my room.
• 16:17
  Speaker 2: The only thing is with my fourth, my fourth was
• 16:19
  Speaker 2: a really hard berth and I had like PTSD when
• 16:22
  Speaker 2: I would take a shower, and thank god we left that.
• 16:26
  Speaker 2: We were living in a townhouse and I didn't have
• 16:28
  Speaker 2: to shower in that shower, but yeah, I loved it.
• 16:33
  Speaker 1: So after our fifth, I leish I'd decided that she
• 16:37
  Speaker 1: wanted to do home births. So we were living in
• 16:39
  Speaker 1: a different town when we had our sixth and seventh
• 16:45
  Speaker 1: in the where we used to live and had them
• 16:47
  Speaker 1: at home. We had just moved to a new to
• 16:52
  Speaker 1: Betel when she was expecting our eighth, and we were
• 16:58
  Speaker 1: living in a rental house that like, I really I
• 17:00
  Speaker 1: didn't like the house and it had very very bad facilities.
• 17:03
  Speaker 1: We were only there for a short amount of time.
• 17:04
  Speaker 1: And that's when she was should do it. I talked
• 17:06
  Speaker 1: to her, we have to go to the hospital for
• 17:07
  Speaker 1: this one, Like, I'm not comfortable was there giving birth
• 17:11
  Speaker 1: in this house? And this was that was this was
• 17:13
  Speaker 1: the only time she she had any And I see
• 17:17
  Speaker 1: that she got an epidural for the eights what and
• 17:20
  Speaker 1: it went really badly and she lost feeling in her
• 17:23
  Speaker 1: legs and she had problems breathing. It was like it
• 17:26
  Speaker 1: was a really really bad experience and it took her
• 17:29
  Speaker 1: like a long time to get over, like being upset
• 17:31
  Speaker 1: at me that I had her had us go to
• 17:33
  Speaker 1: the hospital for for the eighth. But yeah, and then
• 17:35
  Speaker 1: she said't like after that, like and and our youngest
• 17:38
  Speaker 1: were born in the house that we live in now,
• 17:39
  Speaker 1: and uh, everybody's like all the kids love it, like
• 17:44
  Speaker 1: all the other kids and the girls got to help
• 17:46
  Speaker 1: with got to help because she gave birth in the
• 17:49
  Speaker 1: in the middle of the night, and I woke all
• 17:50
  Speaker 1: the kids up and we sat there and we said talem,
• 17:54
  Speaker 1: we said psalms while she was the midwife was with
• 17:57
  Speaker 1: her in the bedroom, and uh, it was. It was
• 17:59
  Speaker 1: a big family experience. It was. It's a lot of fun.
• 18:07
  Speaker 1: I'm Greg Corumbus.
• 18:08
  Speaker 5: Join Jim Garrity of National Review and me each weekday
• 18:11
  Speaker 5: for the Three Martini Lunch Podcast. We'll give you the good, bad,
• 18:14
  Speaker 5: and crazy news of the day and lots of labs too.
• 18:17
  Speaker 5: Find us right here on the Ricochet Audio Network at
• 18:20
  Speaker 5: ricochet dot com or wherever you get your podcasts.
• 18:32
  Speaker 2: When you give births at home, is there like so
• 18:36
  Speaker 2: the midwife does everything and then like that's it. Like
• 18:38
  Speaker 2: I'm so curious about home birth in other countries, Like
• 18:41
  Speaker 2: does she check the baby or do you have to
• 18:42
  Speaker 2: bring them to edutrician?
• 18:44
  Speaker 1: Yeah, no, I would bring the pediatrician like the day
• 18:46
  Speaker 1: or two later. We know people who like do it
• 18:50
  Speaker 1: without a midwife or do like a essentially like a
• 18:53
  Speaker 1: preeperth or a black market like sort of like an
• 18:55
  Speaker 1: unlicensed mid midwife. And that's really that can be really
• 18:59
  Speaker 1: a problem because like unless you have a doctor, then
• 19:03
  Speaker 1: show up was in like a certain amount of time
• 19:07
  Speaker 1: that you have to do a DNA test to prove
• 19:09
  Speaker 1: that the baby's actually yours. I mean it makes sense, yeah, yeah,
• 19:12
  Speaker 1: because they don't know where you might have just picked
• 19:13
  Speaker 1: this baby up, like somebody gave you, you kidnapped this
• 19:16
  Speaker 1: baby from and unless it's on like a license somebody
• 19:19
  Speaker 1: who's who's licensed and licensed midwife for doctor. So with
• 19:23
  Speaker 1: our I think with the sixth, no, the fifth, my
• 19:29
  Speaker 1: rough's wife is a doctor, so she she just wanted
• 19:32
  Speaker 1: to she wanted to be there like she was a
• 19:33
  Speaker 1: friend of the family, and she asked if she could
• 19:36
  Speaker 1: like be help the midwife because she had never been
• 19:38
  Speaker 1: in the birth before. So she was there. But yeah,
• 19:41
  Speaker 1: but then yeah, but the midwife she had with the
• 19:43
  Speaker 1: same midwife for for all the all the younger kids.
• 19:46
  Speaker 2: Are you any of your oldest kids girls?
• 19:49
  Speaker 1: Yeah? Yeah, I have a son, and then three daughters
• 19:52
  Speaker 1: and then five boys. And my wife was happy with that,
• 19:55
  Speaker 1: no more daughters. She's the boy mom.
• 19:59
  Speaker 2: Me too, me too.
• 20:00
  Speaker 1: They're a lot.
• 20:01
  Speaker 2: So have your girls started having babies yet?
• 20:04
  Speaker 1: Yeah? I five.
• 20:05
  Speaker 2: I have two married daughters and so have they had
• 20:07
  Speaker 2: home births? No?
• 20:09
  Speaker 1: No, no. Both my sons in law are like super
• 20:12
  Speaker 1: super square, and so my my oldest daughter, and I'm
• 20:19
  Speaker 1: very lucky and I'm grateful that I'm a wonderfulership of
• 20:23
  Speaker 1: my kids. And she lives across the street.
• 20:24
  Speaker 4: Wow.
• 20:26
  Speaker 1: Yeah, and my second my so I've she did, she's
• 20:29
  Speaker 1: an identical twin. And then there's she hearsays her twin
• 20:33
  Speaker 1: is not yet married. And then our fourth childhood so
• 20:38
  Speaker 1: my third daughter. So, uh, they're actually moving to Betel
• 20:42
  Speaker 1: in the summer. Yeah. So parent right, and your kids
• 20:47
  Speaker 1: will want to live near you, and.
• 20:49
  Speaker 3: You're going to have like a miles radius that your
• 20:53
  Speaker 3: kids can live in to you.
• 20:56
  Speaker 2: I mean, I think I think Evan's advice is right.
• 20:58
  Speaker 2: Parent right. And then I want to live here as.
• 21:00
  Speaker 1: Compared to the rest of my family. Like we joke
• 21:03
  Speaker 1: that mine we all moved to different countries. Then I
• 21:08
  Speaker 1: was born in South Africa and we moved to America
• 21:11
  Speaker 1: when I was three. And my father used to joke
• 21:14
  Speaker 1: that if you draw a line through the seven of
• 21:15
  Speaker 1: the Earth, you'll come out in my in her in
• 21:17
  Speaker 1: his mother in law's house.
• 21:19
  Speaker 2: That's the part. This is the way possible without starting
• 21:22
  Speaker 2: to come back.
• 21:23
  Speaker 1: Yeah, and I moved to Israel, like I moved very
• 21:25
  Speaker 1: far away from my parents, and we moved in my
• 21:28
  Speaker 1: in laws. And I love my parents, my in laws,
• 21:30
  Speaker 1: but We're very happy to live far away. And I'm
• 21:33
  Speaker 1: grateful that my kids want to live near me.
• 21:35
  Speaker 2: I'm talking up the University of Maryland for my children, though,
• 21:40
  Speaker 2: truth be told, and this is I'm sure we'll have
• 21:42
  Speaker 2: to talk about this at some point. We are sort
• 21:45
  Speaker 2: of considering high school for my oldest in Israel.
• 21:47
  Speaker 1: My house is your house, thank you.
• 21:50
  Speaker 2: I'm going to send her over for Chabot. Actually she
• 21:54
  Speaker 2: ends up there, no, and it's it's funny because she's
• 21:56
  Speaker 2: so We went to the Museum of the Bible today.
• 21:59
  Speaker 2: They did a They have these incredible plays of C. S.
• 22:02
  Speaker 2: Lewis's books that are the Chronicles of Maridia, and she's
• 22:05
  Speaker 2: seen all of them and she's read the books a
• 22:08
  Speaker 2: million times or whatever. And we've been to the Museum
• 22:11
  Speaker 2: of the Bible before, but only in the Jewish sections,
• 22:13
  Speaker 2: and it's super well done, like it's not evangelical, like
• 22:18
  Speaker 2: it's just it's really like actually very Jewish, very good.
• 22:23
  Speaker 2: But we did a tour today with a bunch of
• 22:25
  Speaker 2: other friends and we were the only Jews, and so
• 22:27
  Speaker 2: we saw most of the Christian stuff and my daughter
• 22:30
  Speaker 2: was outraged. She's like, what is all this Jesus stuff.
• 22:34
  Speaker 2: I'm like, honey, you're in the Museum of the Bible
• 22:37
  Speaker 2: and it's under a hobby lobby family. You're lucky that
• 22:41
  Speaker 2: they were actually totally respectful in the Jewish areas because
• 22:46
  Speaker 2: they didn't have to be, but they were completely one
• 22:49
  Speaker 2: hundred respectful in the Jewish areas. But this is ultimately
• 22:54
  Speaker 2: a Christian museum, honey. And I'm like, girl, you're gonna
• 22:58
  Speaker 2: have to move to Israel, like if you need this
• 23:00
  Speaker 2: like Jewish bubble around you so tight, there's only one
• 23:03
  Speaker 2: place for you.
• 23:05
  Speaker 1: You homeschooler. Yeah, yeah, So we homeschooled. Are four oldest
• 23:11
  Speaker 1: that we lived in a very small town when we
• 23:14
  Speaker 1: first I mean until we moved to Betel. And when
• 23:16
  Speaker 1: I say a small town, there were eleven kids in
• 23:20
  Speaker 1: my daughter's first grade class and the teacher had twelve kids,
• 23:27
  Speaker 1: so like like of her own, of her own. Yeah,
• 23:30
  Speaker 1: so they would joked that the teacher came to school
• 23:31
  Speaker 1: to get a break. But because they're identical twins, like
• 23:36
  Speaker 1: the teachers couldn't tell them apart. And when one of
• 23:40
  Speaker 1: them got in trouble for what the other one did,
• 23:42
  Speaker 1: my wife said, okay, where we have to like find
• 23:44
  Speaker 1: some way to split them up, separate them. Yeah. Yeah,
• 23:47
  Speaker 1: So we homeschooled them until I think till third grade
• 23:50
  Speaker 1: and uh, and then they wanted to go to Then
• 23:53
  Speaker 1: they did. Then they wanted to go to school. They
• 23:54
  Speaker 1: felt weird. We were the only family in like in
• 23:57
  Speaker 1: our town that that that homeschooled, and it was like
• 24:00
  Speaker 1: it was a bit of a scandal. Uh, DEWI homeschooled.
• 24:03
  Speaker 3: Isn't it not.
• 24:04
  Speaker 2: Super like legal or easy to homeschool?
• 24:06
  Speaker 1: And as well when we did it, it was only
• 24:09
  Speaker 1: starting to be like like talked about and you could
• 24:12
  Speaker 1: do it. It was, it was legal, but you had
• 24:14
  Speaker 1: to like you could get the mastrida. The education ministry
• 24:18
  Speaker 1: could pop in and visit and and occasionally would would
• 24:22
  Speaker 1: give people a hard time. Friend of mine who I
• 24:25
  Speaker 1: used to work with, unschooled. Yeah, so, uh, do you
• 24:30
  Speaker 1: know what I'm schooling is, Kara?
• 24:31
  Speaker 2: No?
• 24:32
  Speaker 5: No.
• 24:33
  Speaker 1: So unschooling is basically like whatever the kids want to do,
• 24:37
  Speaker 1: they do, and you you trust that the kids are
• 24:40
  Speaker 1: are interested, kids are interested in learning. So there's no
• 24:45
  Speaker 1: schedule and no what's the word curriculum Correctum, Yeah, so
• 24:52
  Speaker 1: my wife wasn't into that. My wife was, Okay, this
• 24:54
  Speaker 1: is like trivia them and this is like we're doing
• 24:57
  Speaker 1: an hour of this, and we're doing an hour of
• 24:59
  Speaker 1: that and and workbooks. And she was very like she
• 25:02
  Speaker 1: was super. She studied education, so uh she had her
• 25:06
  Speaker 1: degree in informal education, so she was she like she
• 25:09
  Speaker 1: knew she was gonna be.
• 25:09
  Speaker 6: It was very I like to think that I would
• 25:14
  Speaker 6: trust my kids that I don't know if I would
• 25:16
  Speaker 6: trust them enough to lead their own nedchool.
• 25:21
  Speaker 1: So there were the super hippies that we used, and
• 25:24
  Speaker 1: we used to every couple of weeks, would would they're
• 25:28
  Speaker 1: all the homeschooling it was speaking of homeschooling families would
• 25:31
  Speaker 1: would have a meetup so the kids could uh socialize
• 25:34
  Speaker 1: and and the unschooling the unschoolers would like, how do
• 25:38
  Speaker 1: we how do we like avoid the avoid the cops.
• 25:42
  Speaker 1: But yeah, they were and they're wonderful people, like and
• 25:45
  Speaker 1: I know one of the kids and these they he
• 25:48
  Speaker 1: was a ended up as an officer in the army
• 25:51
  Speaker 1: and like they just they came out fine, like it
• 25:53
  Speaker 1: wasn't didn't hurt anybody.
• 25:54
  Speaker 2: Yeah, I think I would trust my oldest daughter to
• 25:57
  Speaker 2: unschool because I have to like tear her away from
• 26:00
  Speaker 2: books to actually do school. Yeah, none of them would
• 26:04
  Speaker 2: do math on their own, but like, how necessary is it?
• 26:07
  Speaker 2: And I really wouldn't either.
• 26:08
  Speaker 1: No, but you're a big maths family. So like all
• 26:12
  Speaker 1: my kids are computer like I'm I work in computers
• 26:17
  Speaker 1: and all my kids so my son, my oldest son,
• 26:19
  Speaker 1: has as a programmer. My two sons in.
• 26:22
  Speaker 2: Law like math, Like did you like math? Though?
• 26:26
  Speaker 1: I love math?
• 26:26
  Speaker 2: Yeah, my kids none about like math.
• 26:28
  Speaker 1: I my seral nerds discuss like at the shop's dinner table,
• 26:32
  Speaker 1: they like, are you about calculus? Not a joke, They'll
• 26:36
  Speaker 1: like sit around and they're like, are you about calculus?
• 26:39
  Speaker 1: So our kids do.
• 26:40
  Speaker 3: So my husband and I have talked about home school
• 26:42
  Speaker 3: in but the one problem is neither us can do math.
• 26:46
  Speaker 6: But our second plan, and this is genuine bath and
• 26:49
  Speaker 6: the even before we started this podcast, before I even
• 26:51
  Speaker 6: really knew you, one of our plans was to send
• 26:54
  Speaker 6: our kids to.
• 26:54
  Speaker 4: The man DALs because we feel called the curriculum.
• 26:58
  Speaker 1: Damn.
• 26:59
  Speaker 2: Yeah, so wait, I'm going to use some videos I
• 27:01
  Speaker 2: think next year for my oldest because I'm tapped out
• 27:03
  Speaker 2: at fifth grade math. That's where I'm hitting my limits.
• 27:06
  Speaker 1: Still, I still give my kids con academy stuff over
• 27:09
  Speaker 1: the breaks and when they want to like advance past
• 27:12
  Speaker 1: what they do in school. Con academy stuff is great.
• 27:14
  Speaker 2: Interesting.
• 27:15
  Speaker 1: Yeah, they love it.
• 27:16
  Speaker 2: Let's take a break real quick and thank our sponsors,
• 27:18
  Speaker 2: and then I want to continue with this conversation.
• 27:25
  Speaker 4: Hi, this is a young Culter. Welcome to my Ricochet podcast.
• 27:29
  Speaker 1: And Coulter every week on Ricochet. You're home to center
• 27:32
  Speaker 1: right conversation.
• 27:33
  Speaker 3: Hey, that was pretty good.
• 27:43
  Speaker 2: All right, we're back and we're talking homeschool curriculums. So
• 27:48
  Speaker 2: they went back around like what third or fourth grade
• 27:51
  Speaker 2: to school?
• 27:51
  Speaker 1: Yeah, yeah, they were. They felt again there were eleven
• 27:55
  Speaker 1: kids in their grade, so I think when we moved
• 27:58
  Speaker 1: to the town, they're about one hundred and fifteen families,
• 28:03
  Speaker 1: so it was really really a small place.
• 28:06
  Speaker 2: Do you speak English at home?
• 28:07
  Speaker 1: Yeah, yeah, we're very Cheerel speaking English to our kids.
• 28:11
  Speaker 1: My parent mining laws understand Hebrew and speak Hebrew, but
• 28:15
  Speaker 1: my parents don't, so we wanted them to be very
• 28:20
  Speaker 1: comfortable speaking to both sts of grandparents. We started also
• 28:26
  Speaker 1: they all read English. The rule was you can read
• 28:29
  Speaker 1: Harry Potter in Hebrew and to book four, but after
• 28:32
  Speaker 1: book four you have to read them in English. And
• 28:34
  Speaker 1: we wouldn't let them all, wouldn't let them watch the
• 28:36
  Speaker 1: movies until they read the books that held until the
• 28:40
  Speaker 1: our seventh and eighth have dyslexia, so they we kind
• 28:44
  Speaker 1: of gave them a break. They they got to read
• 28:47
  Speaker 1: in well, my seventh, the seventh to now eight just
• 28:51
  Speaker 1: started eighteen, so he read them in Hebrew, but he
• 28:55
  Speaker 1: read English. Now, my fifteen year old, he doesn't read.
• 28:59
  Speaker 1: He's super super dyslexic. So he gets audiobooks of everything
• 29:03
  Speaker 1: and then but he's like he has he had a
• 29:05
  Speaker 1: photographic memory, so like he he doesn't need to read
• 29:08
  Speaker 1: because teachers will say something and you can like recite
• 29:12
  Speaker 1: back everything. The teacher said verbatim.
• 29:15
  Speaker 2: So interesting. So your youngest, you said, is twelve, right,
• 29:19
  Speaker 2: oh yeah, yeah, how is he? How is he doing?
• 29:22
  Speaker 2: Since Ali Shad was passing.
• 29:24
  Speaker 1: Like, it's really amazing. My kids, Like, my wife was
• 29:29
  Speaker 1: a really amazing person and I can we can sit
• 29:31
  Speaker 1: here and spend an hour telling stories about her. She
• 29:35
  Speaker 1: she was like one of these people who was constantly
• 29:37
  Speaker 1: working on herself. She said, Okay, I'm a I'm an
• 29:40
  Speaker 1: angry person. I don't want to be an angry person.
• 29:42
  Speaker 1: What do I need to be not to be an
• 29:43
  Speaker 1: angry person? And then she spent years working on Okay,
• 29:48
  Speaker 1: how do I not be an angry person? And she
• 29:51
  Speaker 1: wasn't an angry person? So and we knew like this
• 29:54
  Speaker 1: wasn't it wasn't a spressed We knew pretty quickly that yeah,
• 29:58
  Speaker 1: she so sorry? Is that that? Uh? We had a
• 30:02
  Speaker 1: son who was living in uh in Texas at the time,
• 30:05
  Speaker 1: and we said, Okay, we're gonna we're gonna go take
• 30:09
  Speaker 1: a vacation and we spend two weeks look up to
• 30:12
  Speaker 1: Texas and we're gonna go drive and drive around and
• 30:15
  Speaker 1: visit trends. She started having weird pains and so you,
• 30:20
  Speaker 1: I mean, I don't know if you want to hear this, methany.
• 30:23
  Speaker 1: I know you guys are you're You're very due. I'm
• 30:24
  Speaker 1: gonna die. I'm gonna die.
• 30:27
  Speaker 2: It was some super podcast.
• 30:29
  Speaker 1: I listened to the podcast and I posted, actually spoke
• 30:32
  Speaker 1: last time about plain trips. I posted our worst plane
• 30:36
  Speaker 1: trip story and I missed this. I think I didn't
• 30:39
  Speaker 1: tag you on it.
• 30:41
  Speaker 2: Tag me on Facebook. I never checked there.
• 30:43
  Speaker 1: No, Yeah, I think on Twitter.
• 30:44
  Speaker 2: Oh that's.
• 30:48
  Speaker 1: We we were. Our worst plane trip is I think
• 30:50
  Speaker 1: when we had uh, there were six kids, and this
• 30:54
  Speaker 1: was when our youngest must have been like a bait.
• 30:57
  Speaker 1: Not our youngest are one who's not twenty two, uh
• 31:01
  Speaker 1: was uh was a baby. So this is like right
• 31:03
  Speaker 1: after nine to eleven, right when the TSA started. So
• 31:08
  Speaker 1: where they're sitting there in line at late because one
• 31:12
  Speaker 1: plane got delayed, and we're and everybody's like angry and
• 31:16
  Speaker 1: and we're like waiting in the security line and we
• 31:19
  Speaker 1: got called side and my wife is, oh, great, they
• 31:22
  Speaker 1: see that we have a lot of kids, They're gonna
• 31:23
  Speaker 1: let us through. NOE. Two of my kids got flagged
• 31:26
  Speaker 1: for U for extra scrutiny, like two kids. Yeah, they
• 31:31
  Speaker 1: used to be these random, scant random yeah. Yeah. So
• 31:37
  Speaker 1: they had to like open their like little plastic knapsacks
• 31:39
  Speaker 1: and take out their plastic scissors and all their arts
• 31:42
  Speaker 1: and crafts and yeah, my wife was so upset. So
• 31:46
  Speaker 1: that was that was I think that was our worst story.
• 31:48
  Speaker 1: Like nobody had slept in like twelve hours, and we
• 31:51
  Speaker 1: had run out of food and uh because we couldn't
• 31:53
  Speaker 1: get a coach of food and like we had that
• 31:56
  Speaker 1: paying like some uh some store. One of these restaurants
• 32:02
  Speaker 1: in the in the in the airport had fresh fruit
• 32:04
  Speaker 1: on it as a display, like they did. They weren't
• 32:06
  Speaker 1: even selling fresh fruit. So we like I paid like
• 32:09
  Speaker 1: thirty dollars for this bowl of fresh fruit. So it
• 32:12
  Speaker 1: was like the only kosher thing that it's this whole airport.
• 32:14
  Speaker 1: That wasn't like Reese's chair butter gun. Right, yeah, that
• 32:18
  Speaker 1: wasn't like jug food. So yeah, that was like our
• 32:22
  Speaker 1: worst flight story. So you were in Texas, Oh yeah,
• 32:26
  Speaker 1: So she started having like pains and back pain, and
• 32:31
  Speaker 1: we thought it was okay because because we did a
• 32:33
  Speaker 1: lot of flying and we did a lot of driving.
• 32:35
  Speaker 1: So we like drove like two and a half thousand
• 32:37
  Speaker 1: miles in the course of two weeks.
• 32:39
  Speaker 2: Oh my god.
• 32:40
  Speaker 1: We drove from like really from Dallas to Austin to
• 32:44
  Speaker 1: Houston to San Antonio to Lubbock to Albuquerque to the
• 32:50
  Speaker 1: Sedona to seen It's so we did a lot of
• 32:53
  Speaker 1: driving and like she thought, okay, she had the backards
• 32:56
  Speaker 1: because she's not used to sitting in a car for
• 32:59
  Speaker 1: that yeah, or fly. Yeah, for I used to sit
• 33:02
  Speaker 1: here for that long, like we she just stay at
• 33:04
  Speaker 1: home mom, and she's like she doesn't go anywhere. She
• 33:05
  Speaker 1: didn't go anywhere. She used to be home with the
• 33:07
  Speaker 1: kids all the time. And so and I just kicked
• 33:11
  Speaker 1: progressively getting worse, and she went to the orthopedis. Then
• 33:15
  Speaker 1: she went to the the this doctor and that doctor
• 33:17
  Speaker 1: and like do what sorry doing physical therapy and at
• 33:23
  Speaker 1: some point, like more things started hurting. So I said,
• 33:25
  Speaker 1: like then this was like a few days before paysack
• 33:28
  Speaker 1: for passover. Said okay, we're going to the to the yard.
• 33:31
  Speaker 1: She said, no, no, it's it's a week before the
• 33:33
  Speaker 1: two days before paysack. It's not just so much to
• 33:35
  Speaker 1: do with it. Noe, We're going and we went. Finally,
• 33:37
  Speaker 1: I'd like I talked to her to going to the
• 33:39
  Speaker 1: yar and she had a CT scan and the like
• 33:42
  Speaker 1: I found all these uh these lesions. Wow, and uh
• 33:47
  Speaker 1: they thought originally thought one thing. And then she had
• 33:49
  Speaker 1: a bone marrow test and said no, it's it's uh
• 33:53
  Speaker 1: she had melanoma. Those but she had no like turned
• 33:57
  Speaker 1: out like twenty percent of melanoma people have melanoma have
• 34:01
  Speaker 1: no nothing on their skin, Like it's all it's just
• 34:04
  Speaker 1: like internal Yeah, it's called a cult melanoma. Wow. Yeah.
• 34:09
  Speaker 1: So and because there was no signs and it was
• 34:13
  Speaker 1: it was she had already like fantastasized and it was
• 34:17
  Speaker 1: like all over by the time we sounded. And we're
• 34:21
  Speaker 1: grateful that we've had seven months from the time that
• 34:25
  Speaker 1: it was diagnosed the time that she passed.
• 34:28
  Speaker 2: So I was thinking, I was putting my was putting
• 34:34
  Speaker 2: my fifth to bed right before we came on. And
• 34:37
  Speaker 2: I think you might be wandering around my house. Actually
• 34:39
  Speaker 2: right now, I don't. I don't know if it took.
• 34:40
  Speaker 2: And there's a lot of talking going on right now.
• 34:44
  Speaker 2: And I was laying there and I was thinking of Elishabbah,
• 34:47
  Speaker 2: and I was thinking, like how awful. And I was thinking,
• 34:49
  Speaker 2: but she'd got to do this everyway, like this is
• 34:54
  Speaker 2: such a gift.
• 34:55
  Speaker 1: She would like. Look, so when we got married, she like,
• 34:58
  Speaker 1: she said, okay, she said she she uh studied the education,
• 35:03
  Speaker 1: and she when our oldest was a few months old,
• 35:09
  Speaker 1: she got a job as a substitute teacher for for
• 35:13
  Speaker 1: three months. And she did that that she said, never again,
• 35:16
  Speaker 1: I'm never leaving the house. So she tried it, she
• 35:19
  Speaker 1: and she said, and when we got married, she wants
• 35:22
  Speaker 1: to work, and she though she doesn't want to be
• 35:23
  Speaker 1: a stay at home mom.
• 35:24
  Speaker 2: And then she had those babies, and then she had their.
• 35:26
  Speaker 1: Babies, and both my daughters, like already said in advanced
• 35:29
  Speaker 1: I said that they filled her husbands. I am going
• 35:31
  Speaker 1: to be at state home mom and there's no there's
• 35:33
  Speaker 1: no question, and they're they're both they're both at home
• 35:36
  Speaker 1: and they both uh is that is it?
• 35:39
  Speaker 2: Is it common to be a stay at home mom
• 35:40
  Speaker 2: in Israel? Because I feel like I don't know many
• 35:42
  Speaker 2: people who are or like they have side hustles.
• 35:45
  Speaker 1: Not it really isn't certainly not in our community because
• 35:48
  Speaker 1: like most people, there's a lot of people work in
• 35:51
  Speaker 1: education and a lot of people like both parents need
• 35:54
  Speaker 1: to work to uh to make as of me. But
• 35:57
  Speaker 1: the people who are who are teachers, so the women
• 36:00
  Speaker 1: and are out of the house where the kids are
• 36:01
  Speaker 1: out of the house like once they get to her
• 36:03
  Speaker 1: certain age. So it's not. But I'm very grateful that
• 36:08
  Speaker 1: that you and I've been working in high tech for
• 36:12
  Speaker 1: thirty plus years and I'm always able to to support
• 36:18
  Speaker 1: family without her having to go to work. So thank
• 36:21
  Speaker 1: God rock to them that that are able to do that.
• 36:25
  Speaker 1: And she wanted to be. She was stayed o walm.
• 36:27
  Speaker 1: That's what she did. That's what's like she she that's
• 36:30
  Speaker 1: that's that was who she was.
• 36:32
  Speaker 2: She was.
• 36:35
  Speaker 1: Was doing once the kids got home from school. She
• 36:38
  Speaker 1: had her side things.
• 36:39
  Speaker 2: But she's very like domestic. She like liked cooking and
• 36:45
  Speaker 2: baking and cleaning or was she cleaning.
• 36:48
  Speaker 1: I'm I'm the cook. I'm the I'm the chef in
• 36:50
  Speaker 1: the family. I do all the cooking.
• 36:51
  Speaker 2: Remember that, all the meat.
• 36:52
  Speaker 1: I do all the meat. And I still that's it.
• 36:54
  Speaker 1: So so my my oldest granddaughter, like she knows that
• 36:59
  Speaker 1: we're going on over to ts eighties. We're getting We're
• 37:02
  Speaker 1: getting meat. There's gonna be it's gonna be barbecue. Do
• 37:09
  Speaker 1: you grill? I barbecue? I know grill. Okay.
• 37:12
  Speaker 6: They're sending about a man that gets his hands on
• 37:16
  Speaker 6: and then he just loves the grill strikes away.
• 37:18
  Speaker 1: This is my barbecue. I do. I do uh, I
• 37:22
  Speaker 1: do brisket, and I'll do like eight ten hour smokes,
• 37:26
  Speaker 1: different different woods and different rubs. I'm very big well
• 37:30
  Speaker 1: bread and I do.
• 37:31
  Speaker 2: I Are you a sour dough guy?
• 37:35
  Speaker 1: I have zero luck with sour dough. I don't. I
• 37:38
  Speaker 1: haven't I've tied multiple times without any luck.
• 37:43
  Speaker 2: We don't like sour dough in our family, but we
• 37:45
  Speaker 2: like the discard. We like making like waffles and all
• 37:48
  Speaker 2: that stuff, but we don't actually like sour dough bread,
• 37:51
  Speaker 2: and so it seems kind of silly.
• 37:54
  Speaker 3: Always looks great. I always see you broad on Instagram.
• 37:56
  Speaker 2: It always looks so I do French bread.
• 37:59
  Speaker 3: That is at the the gets you will beget that
• 38:01
  Speaker 3: they're so vague.
• 38:05
  Speaker 1: Yeah I do, I do, but yet I do Forcatca,
• 38:07
  Speaker 1: but I have it. I haven't mastered the sour dough.
• 38:10
  Speaker 1: And I grew up in a West Coast. I grew
• 38:12
  Speaker 1: up eating San Francisco sourdough, and San Francisco sourdough is
• 38:15
  Speaker 1: like on another level.
• 38:17
  Speaker 2: So that's likes the air, it's the water.
• 38:21
  Speaker 3: You guys need to teach me.
• 38:23
  Speaker 4: It's my biggest complaint to move into the US is
• 38:26
  Speaker 4: that the bread is trench.
• 38:27
  Speaker 3: And I can't find a good bread anyway.
• 38:32
  Speaker 4: I've tried.
• 38:33
  Speaker 3: I've tried. It's my biggest complaint. So I need to
• 38:35
  Speaker 3: just get over it and correct my hands.
• 38:37
  Speaker 2: The baguettes that I make are surprisingly easy.
• 38:40
  Speaker 4: Okay.
• 38:40
  Speaker 2: The only thing is is it takes time because the
• 38:44
  Speaker 2: night before you have to make a poolish, which is
• 38:46
  Speaker 2: like a starter basically, and so I just I have
• 38:50
  Speaker 2: to like plan hour.
• 38:52
  Speaker 1: Pool is like when I when I do that, I'll
• 38:55
  Speaker 1: do it like yeah, that's it's called the.
• 38:59
  Speaker 2: That my just barble like that was very impressive.
• 39:02
  Speaker 1: And I always joked that I I spent five years
• 39:08
  Speaker 1: studying French in uh in school, middle school or high school,
• 39:12
  Speaker 1: and my friends was actually pretty good. I read La
• 39:14
  Speaker 1: miss in French in high school. Yeah, so wait, what
• 39:19
  Speaker 1: is this?
• 39:19
  Speaker 2: What's rewind to the thirty six hour poolish? What you
• 39:22
  Speaker 2: just leave it for thirty six hours?
• 39:24
  Speaker 1: Pretty much?
• 39:26
  Speaker 3: Interesting?
• 39:26
  Speaker 1: Pretty much? And then and then like they're really like
• 39:29
  Speaker 1: the the East really very very small about the East,
• 39:31
  Speaker 1: like it's yeah, a pinch, I use a pinch, I'll
• 39:34
  Speaker 1: find the I'll find the recipe. I'll send you the
• 39:36
  Speaker 1: recipe and we'll post it on our like Instagram. So
• 39:41
  Speaker 1: and then yeah, and then you get like a really
• 39:44
  Speaker 1: good crown the flag. Yeah.
• 39:48
  Speaker 2: I love so my kids. So I went to France
• 39:50
  Speaker 2: with my older three children in June, and my children
• 39:53
  Speaker 2: became total snobs and we ate bag at every single
• 39:58
  Speaker 2: day we were there. And they were like, this is amazing.
• 40:01
  Speaker 1: It's smart flour and salt. I know, that's it, and
• 40:06
  Speaker 1: it's amazing.
• 40:07
  Speaker 2: So my oldest my oldest daughter doesn't eat. She's like
• 40:11
  Speaker 2: a head below all the other children in her age,
• 40:13
  Speaker 2: and like she's she's so small that we're like actually
• 40:16
  Speaker 2: gonna like we're bringing her air for some testing because
• 40:19
  Speaker 2: it's like kind of weird house. Well she is that.
• 40:23
  Speaker 3: I grew out of it, but I was tiny, tiny time.
• 40:26
  Speaker 2: Sure, I'm sure it's fine. She just doesn't eat. She
• 40:27
  Speaker 2: eats like a bird. She eats seeds.
• 40:29
  Speaker 1: That's it.
• 40:30
  Speaker 2: Seeds and fruit. That's all she eats. But we when
• 40:32
  Speaker 2: we went to France, she ate a ton at every
• 40:35
  Speaker 2: meal and she's like, this is an this is an
• 40:37
  Speaker 2: unfamiliar sensation. I feel it full.
• 40:40
  Speaker 3: I'm like, yeah, you should.
• 40:41
  Speaker 2: Try this at home too.
• 40:43
  Speaker 1: Good food is good food.
• 40:45
  Speaker 2: Yeah, but it didn't carry over to home unfortunately.
• 40:48
  Speaker 1: Oh yeah, So I did all the cooking, and my
• 40:50
  Speaker 1: wife loves to clean, and so she she so it
• 40:55
  Speaker 1: used to. I mean when when somebody in our in
• 40:59
  Speaker 1: the community is like sitting shiva, one of the women after.
• 41:03
  Speaker 2: Someone has died their like morning in the morning, in the.
• 41:06
  Speaker 1: Morning, so the women in the community would get together
• 41:09
  Speaker 1: and hand out jobs. You cook this meal, you cook
• 41:11
  Speaker 1: that meal, and my wife hates cooking. She hated cooking.
• 41:15
  Speaker 1: So she said, like at a point she went when
• 41:18
  Speaker 1: people will call to organize things, she would realize that
• 41:21
  Speaker 1: I just upset her. So you know, I'm not I'm
• 41:23
  Speaker 1: not cooking any meals, but if there's anything else that
• 41:27
  Speaker 1: that needs to be done, I'm happy to do it.
• 41:29
  Speaker 2: That was my favorite person.
• 41:30
  Speaker 1: She would do everybody's laundry. And she would like do
• 41:32
  Speaker 1: laundry and iron and fold laundry, and that's like that's
• 41:36
  Speaker 1: what that's everyone actually wants.
• 41:39
  Speaker 6: That's true when I when I was having a baby,
• 41:41
  Speaker 6: everybody was like, oh, brunner over on home cooked meal
• 41:44
  Speaker 6: and like I can just uber eat.
• 41:46
  Speaker 3: But what I really wanted somebody to come and like
• 41:48
  Speaker 3: scrub my.
• 41:49
  Speaker 2: Floors and do my laundry.
• 41:50
  Speaker 1: So that's what she would do. She would like do
• 41:52
  Speaker 1: people's lundering. That's a gift and happy space. So she
• 41:55
  Speaker 1: loved that.
• 41:56
  Speaker 2: When we when we came to visit you. One of
• 41:58
  Speaker 2: my favorite stories that I always think about whenever we
• 42:02
  Speaker 2: whenever we talk about like the Jewish presence in Israel
• 42:06
  Speaker 2: is you walked us around and showed us an ancient
• 42:10
  Speaker 2: wine press right in Bathel?
• 42:12
  Speaker 1: Is that my wife? Because she did the course, but yeah, yeah,
• 42:16
  Speaker 1: and she.
• 42:17
  Speaker 2: Was like, do you think do you think that the
• 42:19
  Speaker 2: Muslims had this wine press or do you think that
• 42:23
  Speaker 2: maybe there were Jews here that did this ancient wine press.
• 42:28
  Speaker 2: What is it like like raising children in a place
• 42:32
  Speaker 2: that has like such history that you're like walking through
• 42:35
  Speaker 2: your town and you see this like three thousand year
• 42:38
  Speaker 2: old wine press, Like what is that coming from Reno, Nevada.
• 42:43
  Speaker 1: It's like a fish the fish and water thing. It's
• 42:45
  Speaker 1: like you don't even realize it. It's just there. It's like, okay,
• 42:49
  Speaker 1: this is where this biblical story happened. And that biblical
• 42:54
  Speaker 1: story appened. It's like a three minute while. So again,
• 42:57
  Speaker 1: we lived in Betel, which is in the in Genesis.
• 43:03
  Speaker 1: Is where when when when Jacob is leaving his his
• 43:07
  Speaker 1: parents house, he stops, they tell and he has the
• 43:10
  Speaker 1: stream about the ladder and so yeah, we have this
• 43:14
  Speaker 1: the neighborhood that's named it's called Sulem Jakob the Jacob's Ladder.
• 43:18
  Speaker 1: Remember that where they were? Yeah, where they where? They
• 43:20
  Speaker 1: think this is where where it happened. Uh, And uh yeah,
• 43:24
  Speaker 1: So yeah, the kids grow up and they you know,
• 43:26
  Speaker 1: they go to school and they all go as part
• 43:28
  Speaker 1: of the school, they walk over to to this place,
• 43:32
  Speaker 1: and there are number a number of other biblical stories
• 43:35
  Speaker 1: that happened, like really in our area where they where
• 43:37
  Speaker 1: they think that uh, some stuff from the from the
• 43:40
  Speaker 1: prophets happened, and yeah, this is where this person's uh
• 43:44
  Speaker 1: altar was where they try to set up a competing
• 43:48
  Speaker 1: uh competing temple with the with the temple in Jerusalem.
• 43:52
  Speaker 1: And yeah, so it's and yeah, it's it's. It's again
• 43:55
  Speaker 1: it's compared to growing up and renow, it's it's very different.
• 43:58
  Speaker 1: It's very different than you're living in in a in
• 44:00
  Speaker 1: a land where and again, don't get me wrong, I
• 44:03
  Speaker 1: love America. I'm consider myself very American. But where you
• 44:08
  Speaker 1: have thousands and thousands of years of history, it's pretty
• 44:11
  Speaker 1: amazing and you look, I guess we get a bit
• 44:16
  Speaker 1: like what I will go back and visit America's it's
• 44:19
  Speaker 1: sometimes like certain dissonance when you're used to every singing
• 44:22
  Speaker 1: kosher and and be able to go to when you
• 44:26
  Speaker 1: need to to doab and we need to go to
• 44:29
  Speaker 1: a prayer service, there's a prayer service right there. You
• 44:32
  Speaker 1: don't have to like organize your day around like when
• 44:35
  Speaker 1: we were when we were in Texas, like at the
• 44:38
  Speaker 1: organized are like traveling around. Okay, when can I get
• 44:42
  Speaker 1: to a minion in the morning, When can I get
• 44:44
  Speaker 1: to a morning prayer service?
• 44:45
  Speaker 4: How often?
• 44:47
  Speaker 3: How often?
• 44:47
  Speaker 1: Three times a day, every day, three types of day,
• 44:50
  Speaker 1: like do you show on yeah, okay, Orthodox Jews in
• 44:55
  Speaker 1: three pray three times a day. So I go to
• 44:58
  Speaker 1: Sunrise preyer service every day and I've been doing that
• 45:01
  Speaker 1: for about thirty years. And then there's an afternoon service
• 45:06
  Speaker 1: and then there's a nighttime service.
• 45:09
  Speaker 2: Seth went to a concert with our oldest son on
• 45:12
  Speaker 2: his birthday. It was a week ago. And Seth is
• 45:16
  Speaker 2: not the I'm the planner of the family, and so
• 45:20
  Speaker 2: in his experience, things just happen like we're here and
• 45:25
  Speaker 2: there's food, Wow, what are the odds? And we also
• 45:29
  Speaker 2: keep kosher. And so he brought our ten year old,
• 45:33
  Speaker 2: who was ten that day, to a concert in an arena,
• 45:36
  Speaker 2: Capital One Arena here at Washington And I spent the
• 45:40
  Speaker 2: whole day like meticulously planning, like what could they pack
• 45:43
  Speaker 2: that would be like good? And then I was I
• 45:46
  Speaker 2: put so much thought into it.
• 45:47
  Speaker 1: It was.
• 45:48
  Speaker 2: It was ridiculous because I was like, maybe they want
• 45:50
  Speaker 2: to have a pretzel, but I don't. Is the pretzel
• 45:54
  Speaker 2: dairy like I just because you can't mix meat and milk,
• 45:58
  Speaker 2: And so.
• 45:59
  Speaker 1: I was like, so just on that topic, like I
• 46:02
  Speaker 1: made myself. I started making myself a cup of coffee,
• 46:06
  Speaker 1: and I like what it was going to Still, I've
• 46:09
  Speaker 1: still flash from uh from I normally don't we're talking.
• 46:12
  Speaker 2: We're talking to having at two thirty in the morning
• 46:14
  Speaker 2: his time.
• 46:15
  Speaker 1: Yeah, that's yeah, So I ate something at ten o'clock
• 46:19
  Speaker 1: last night, so I'm still, uh so.
• 46:21
  Speaker 2: Can you wait six hours between when you've had me
• 46:24
  Speaker 2: and when you have eat milk? So we wait three hours?
• 46:28
  Speaker 3: Thanks Alice.
• 46:29
  Speaker 2: Wow, yeah, yeah, so you have to sort of keep track.
• 46:33
  Speaker 2: And so anyway, Seth was Seth was burning our son.
• 46:36
  Speaker 2: I was like thinking, like, do they have any kosher
• 46:39
  Speaker 2: pretzels at the like whatever are they? Dear? I don't
• 46:42
  Speaker 2: know whatever, So put so much thought into I packed
• 46:45
  Speaker 2: the little bag whatever. And then he texts me twenty
• 46:50
  Speaker 2: five minutes later after he's left the house and said,
• 46:53
  Speaker 2: I forgot our food bag on the front seat of
• 46:55
  Speaker 2: the car. Sorry about that. See you later. And I'm like, so,
• 46:58
  Speaker 2: what are you planning on feeding myself? And he so
• 47:02
  Speaker 2: they left super duper duper early because they got VIP
• 47:06
  Speaker 2: tickets and they were going to meet the band and
• 47:08
  Speaker 2: everything was just holding.
• 47:10
  Speaker 1: I'll email him to fight out about it. Not that
• 47:13
  Speaker 1: I have friends. We email back and forth on the
• 47:15
  Speaker 1: regular basis. Love it.
• 47:16
  Speaker 2: Yeah, he tells me that sometimes. So he by the way,
• 47:19
  Speaker 2: don't tell him that I told this story on the
• 47:20
  Speaker 2: podcast though, because he doesn't. Don't tell me. Yeah, don't
• 47:24
  Speaker 2: tell him. We have a podcast. And so the so
• 47:28
  Speaker 2: they just basically didn't eat the whole time. And when
• 47:32
  Speaker 2: I'm like furiously texting him, what are you planning on
• 47:35
  Speaker 2: doing with my son and how are you planning on
• 47:37
  Speaker 2: feeding him? He was like, well, maybe they have food there.
• 47:40
  Speaker 2: I'm like, food doesn't just appear when we discover kosher
• 47:45
  Speaker 2: food in the wild. It's not by chance, it's by design.
• 47:49
  Speaker 2: And I can tell you there is no kosher food there.
• 47:52
  Speaker 1: I just know, I know, but yeah, right, you can
• 47:56
  Speaker 1: always grab a bag of chips or that's.
• 47:58
  Speaker 2: What they did. But it was two pm and that
• 48:02
  Speaker 2: was it for the They got home at midnight.
• 48:04
  Speaker 1: Hey, you know what your son didn't care.
• 48:07
  Speaker 2: He did it. He had the SETH said. He kept
• 48:11
  Speaker 2: on like offering him food and like there was a
• 48:13
  Speaker 2: pretzel stand there, like he could give him a pretzel.
• 48:16
  Speaker 2: And he was like, no, I'm good, I'm good. I
• 48:18
  Speaker 2: want to go see the concert. I want to go
• 48:20
  Speaker 2: see the show Boys. But I'm a Jewish mother and
• 48:22
  Speaker 2: so when you leave the house at two pm and
• 48:25
  Speaker 2: don't have a meal plan for my ten year.
• 48:27
  Speaker 1: Old, so I'm the planner, I like, I always like
• 48:30
  Speaker 1: over over plan these things, and I don't. I don't
• 48:34
  Speaker 1: leave the house without like knowing where a secret stash
• 48:37
  Speaker 1: of like dried food or whatever in my bag or
• 48:40
  Speaker 1: ex targers.
• 48:41
  Speaker 2: And we had that issue at the Museum of the Bible.
• 48:43
  Speaker 2: My snacks stash. Actually that was it. I had to
• 48:46
  Speaker 2: buy snacks out in the wild, so I never normally
• 48:49
  Speaker 2: have to do. But we were there for so long.
• 48:52
  Speaker 2: And it was funny because we took a tour group
• 48:54
  Speaker 2: and they provided lunch on the tour group and they
• 48:57
  Speaker 2: served ham and cheese and my kids were like, what
• 49:02
  Speaker 2: is ham? Could we could we eat it?
• 49:06
  Speaker 1: I always joke. My my my favorite growing up. So
• 49:11
  Speaker 1: we went to a Conservative synagogue and there in Reno.
• 49:15
  Speaker 1: When I was growing up, there was a k of
• 49:17
  Speaker 1: this is like the inside baseball, inside Jewish baseball. There
• 49:20
  Speaker 1: was a reform synagogue and a conservative synagogue where I
• 49:24
  Speaker 1: grew up, and there's no orthodox synagogue. So you had
• 49:27
  Speaker 1: some of these families who were attached like they they
• 49:31
  Speaker 1: they would come to one of the synagogues and they
• 49:33
  Speaker 1: would show up on hell is they knew some stuff. So, uh,
• 49:37
  Speaker 1: this one guy he came it was Passover, so we're
• 49:40
  Speaker 1: not allowed to eat bread and we only eat matsa.
• 49:42
  Speaker 1: So he came to school in fifth grade with ham
• 49:45
  Speaker 1: and cheese on matso I love it.
• 49:47
  Speaker 4: Wait, so your parents aren't religious, Well they.
• 49:52
  Speaker 1: Are, they're traditional. Yeah, so we knows right, Okay, in
• 49:58
  Speaker 1: South Africa's like like England that there's only there's no
• 50:03
  Speaker 1: reforming conservative. You're either religious or you're not religious, like
• 50:06
  Speaker 1: there's no there's no in the middle. So they both
• 50:08
  Speaker 1: grew up in these like very traditional households. And my my, my,
• 50:13
  Speaker 1: my grandfather, my mother's father was you weren't religious, but
• 50:18
  Speaker 1: he was show my Shabbat, Like we didn't leave, they
• 50:20
  Speaker 1: didn't go drive on Shabbat, we didn't do stuff on
• 50:22
  Speaker 1: Shabbat when we were and my my grandfather's and we
• 50:25
  Speaker 1: went to synagogue and we did all the the Sabbath rituals,
• 50:31
  Speaker 1: make Kiddish and stuff. And then yeah, we didn't drive,
• 50:33
  Speaker 1: didn't go driving on on on on the Sabbath. But
• 50:36
  Speaker 1: it was hard in high school. So because then we
• 50:38
  Speaker 1: Friday nights, everybody was home and my little candles and
• 50:42
  Speaker 1: we had we had Friday night dinner and uh, if
• 50:47
  Speaker 1: homecoming was on Friday night, we're not going to homecoming
• 50:49
  Speaker 1: where we're home for uh, for Friday night dinner.
• 50:52
  Speaker 2: We we just went to the Museum of the Bible,
• 50:54
  Speaker 2: and so we have We've had a lot of theological
• 50:56
  Speaker 2: conversations today. And I was telling Ultima, who's almost eight,
• 51:00
  Speaker 2: he's eight next month, that he didn't know that you
• 51:03
  Speaker 2: could be Jewish and not Orthodox.
• 51:06
  Speaker 1: But that was a big shock to my kids. Also.
• 51:08
  Speaker 2: Yeah, and I'm surprised by that because like my family
• 51:11
  Speaker 2: aren't Orthox and so I was surprised that that was
• 51:13
  Speaker 2: news to him. And I'm a little troubled. Actually, Ultima
• 51:18
  Speaker 2: in pure ultimate form is like, so I could still
• 51:21
  Speaker 2: be Jewish but not keep kosher anymore. I could still
• 51:26
  Speaker 2: be Jewish but go to a concert on a Friday night,
• 51:30
  Speaker 2: and I'm like, technically ish, Yes, that's true.
• 51:35
  Speaker 1: This is like one of those things like had to
• 51:36
  Speaker 1: like sit down and expect my kids for the that
• 51:40
  Speaker 1: just because like we have family or friends or people
• 51:44
  Speaker 1: who aren't religious, it doesn't mean that they're not Jewish,
• 51:48
  Speaker 1: like right, no, none of that, they are not. They're Jewish,
• 51:53
  Speaker 1: they're just not so evan.
• 51:55
  Speaker 3: What made you become ortodox?
• 51:57
  Speaker 1: I said, I came with after high school, Like my
• 52:01
  Speaker 1: parents said, okay, like I was, I was a rambunctious kid,
• 52:06
  Speaker 1: and my parents wanted, okay, before before you go to college,
• 52:10
  Speaker 1: why don't you take a year off, go go to Israel,
• 52:14
  Speaker 1: get some connection with your roots. And so yeah, I
• 52:18
  Speaker 1: grew up in this conservative household, all believed in God
• 52:21
  Speaker 1: and went to Sunday School and had like some sort
• 52:25
  Speaker 1: of level of Jewish education. And the Conservative movement has
• 52:31
  Speaker 1: a year program for post high school. You go when
• 52:34
  Speaker 1: you spend a leadership program, a semester at Hebrew University
• 52:37
  Speaker 1: and then a semester on Gibbutz. And after about a
• 52:43
  Speaker 1: month two months on this program, like none of this
• 52:46
  Speaker 1: like half half stuff like your in or you're out,
• 52:50
  Speaker 1: your inter you're out either your you're you're religious or
• 52:53
  Speaker 1: you're not religious. Like I didn't. I didn't like buy
• 52:56
  Speaker 1: this like middle of the road stuff. What's the karate kid?
• 53:00
  Speaker 1: You walk on this side, you walk on that side,
• 53:02
  Speaker 1: You walk in the middle of the street, middle of
• 53:03
  Speaker 1: the street, like you get squished like a grape. So
• 53:07
  Speaker 1: I wasn't. I'm not a middle of the road type
• 53:09
  Speaker 1: of guy. I'm I mean arount that's interesting. So I
• 53:12
  Speaker 1: was in. I was in, and uh I finished the
• 53:15
  Speaker 1: year and I stayed for another year to spill study
• 53:17
  Speaker 1: in yeshiva, and uh, that was it. That was it.
• 53:22
  Speaker 3: That's very cool.
• 53:24
  Speaker 4: Yeah, and your wife was Orthodox already.
• 53:26
  Speaker 1: Yeah, I went Orthodox? Yet was she was?
• 53:28
  Speaker 2: She a little concerned that maybe you were like flaky
• 53:32
  Speaker 2: and that you.
• 53:32
  Speaker 1: Were absolutely not. No, I was very I was much
• 53:34
  Speaker 1: more serious about it than she was.
• 53:36
  Speaker 2: Oh that's funny, My, my, my, he's not Orthodox. From
• 53:40
  Speaker 2: birth sets Sets family at some point became Orthodox between
• 53:45
  Speaker 2: his older sisters bot Mitzvah and his bar Mitzvah, so
• 53:48
  Speaker 2: in in his early teens he became religious. Uh, he
• 53:52
  Speaker 2: messes up our kosher kitchen every single day. If he's
• 53:55
  Speaker 2: allowed in the kitchen, he messes something up guaranteed. He
• 53:59
  Speaker 2: like I was, I was serving something that was like
• 54:01
  Speaker 2: very obviously meat, and I was like, can you go
• 54:04
  Speaker 2: grab the silverware? And he comes back and he starts
• 54:08
  Speaker 2: putting all the silver down, like that's dairy, you just
• 54:11
  Speaker 2: that's all theat And he looked at it and he
• 54:13
  Speaker 2: was like, yes, you're right, Yes, I know him right,
• 54:19
  Speaker 2: go back and get the pace is a very smart man.
• 54:22
  Speaker 4: But the more I talk to you, the more I
• 54:24
  Speaker 4: realized he probably shouldn't be allowed at a kitchen.
• 54:27
  Speaker 2: Yeah, so his I think I've I've explained this on
• 54:30
  Speaker 2: the podcast before. He has the smarts all in one bucket.
• 54:36
  Speaker 2: And he's really really smart in that bucket. It's rey
• 54:39
  Speaker 2: smarter than me. I just I distribute it more evenly.
• 54:44
  Speaker 2: But he's very smart. Commense maybe yeah, No, it's the
• 54:52
  Speaker 2: it's the So it's funny because I'm like listening to
• 54:54
  Speaker 2: Evan say like he cooks and he bakes, and I'm like,
• 54:58
  Speaker 2: I would be I would be con So I'm leaving
• 55:02
  Speaker 2: a lot in May actually, and I'm I'm I'm gonna
• 55:06
  Speaker 2: have to like put stuff in the freezer so that
• 55:08
  Speaker 2: my kids can eat his.
• 55:11
  Speaker 1: You go with your you alost daughter to take care
• 55:13
  Speaker 1: of it.
• 55:13
  Speaker 2: She's like, yeah, she is a ball busted, but she's
• 55:17
  Speaker 2: not there yet. But ultimate actually he he really loves cooking,
• 55:22
  Speaker 2: like he wants to be a chef, but he's not
• 55:25
  Speaker 2: quite there that he can do it alone. But I'm
• 55:27
  Speaker 2: a little bit concerned about today because he's been really
• 55:30
  Speaker 2: waffling does he want to own a meat restaurant or
• 55:33
  Speaker 2: does he own it want to own a dairy restaurant?
• 55:36
  Speaker 2: And now today has he decided maybe he's just going
• 55:38
  Speaker 2: to have a non kosher restaurant.
• 55:41
  Speaker 1: I don't know.
• 55:42
  Speaker 2: I don't know.
• 55:42
  Speaker 1: I wanted to be a chef for a long time,
• 55:45
  Speaker 1: and uh, I'm very grateful that a friend of mine
• 55:49
  Speaker 1: like talks me out of like yeah, dropping out of
• 55:54
  Speaker 1: college to go a prentice at a restaurant. And uh,
• 55:57
  Speaker 1: it's it's a hard it's it's it's it's hard work
• 55:59
  Speaker 1: guitar and it's it's it's not a lot of fun
• 56:03
  Speaker 1: unless you're really really into it. But my mother is
• 56:06
  Speaker 1: a like study like she's a trade chef like she
• 56:10
  Speaker 1: and she like really so starting like third grade, she
• 56:14
  Speaker 1: was very much okay, like you want to eat lunch
• 56:16
  Speaker 1: at school? I want to show you how to make
• 56:19
  Speaker 1: everything you want to make. I'm not gonna make love
• 56:21
  Speaker 1: for you. So she's stopped making our lunches in like
• 56:23
  Speaker 1: third grade, and she said, well, I'll teach you to
• 56:25
  Speaker 1: make whatever you want. I'll buy you whatever you want,
• 56:28
  Speaker 1: but you're making your own lunch. So that's great. That's
• 56:31
  Speaker 1: I learned how to I learned how to cook and
• 56:34
  Speaker 1: and and and and make food. And uh. We joked
• 56:38
  Speaker 1: that I had to teach my wife how to to
• 56:40
  Speaker 1: do laundry and how to clean a house and and
• 56:45
  Speaker 1: a lot of that stuff and do all these things
• 56:47
  Speaker 1: because her mother was you want to help go play.
• 56:49
  Speaker 2: That's funny. Seth taught me how to like put diapers
• 56:51
  Speaker 2: on our kids and how to burp our kids. Like,
• 56:53
  Speaker 2: I don't know any of that stuff.
• 56:55
  Speaker 1: So I said, my father's a pediatrician. He has changed
• 56:57
  Speaker 1: three diapers in his life, except taught me all of
• 57:03
  Speaker 1: that stuff. Yeah. No, my father purposely whenever the nurses
• 57:07
  Speaker 1: would come in, he would mess up changing diapers, so
• 57:09
  Speaker 1: he never had to change diapers. Weaponized incumpsis Yeah, and
• 57:13
  Speaker 1: my father is literally the most competent person in the
• 57:16
  Speaker 1: entire universe. Like he can do any day all right, Well.
• 57:18
  Speaker 2: We have both yawned like fifteen times between us and you,
• 57:22
  Speaker 2: who woke up at two thirty in the morning, have
• 57:24
  Speaker 2: not yawned once.
• 57:26
  Speaker 1: But I went back to bed. I've got to get
• 57:28
  Speaker 1: an hour's sleep before i have to get up for.
• 57:31
  Speaker 2: All right, thank you so much.
• 57:33
  Speaker 1: I pret you allowing me a man to come into
• 57:38
  Speaker 1: your woman's only space.
• 57:39
  Speaker 2: No, this was great.
• 57:40
  Speaker 3: Yeah, we need more man, this is what we need.
• 57:42
  Speaker 3: We need, we need more dads. Take me a dad
• 57:46
  Speaker 3: of nine. I feel like that that's a rare see.
• 57:50
  Speaker 2: And I got to tell my most favorite story about
• 57:53
  Speaker 2: how you inspired our large family. And whenever we have
• 57:56
  Speaker 2: people over our house and they see arm nate craziness,
• 58:01
  Speaker 2: I hope that we can do that for someone else
• 58:03
  Speaker 2: in turn?
• 58:04
  Speaker 1: Would you say no, whenever I see I said Bethany
• 58:07
  Speaker 1: and maz Aaltov when they have a new baby, the
• 58:10
  Speaker 1: first thing you said is thanks to your wife.
• 58:13
  Speaker 2: That's true, That's really true. I remember that moment so vividly,
• 58:16
  Speaker 2: looking at him him, but he looked at me and
• 58:19
  Speaker 2: like no words exchanged. We're just like we just nodded
• 58:22
  Speaker 2: to each other, like yep.
• 58:24
  Speaker 1: Yeah, our kids. I'm very grateful that we have like
• 58:27
  Speaker 1: wonderful kids and they're all really really just good kids.
• 58:30
  Speaker 2: And yeah, and seeing that, seeing that bond between all
• 58:33
  Speaker 2: of them. Okay, I know I just said that we
• 58:34
  Speaker 2: were gonna hang up. But they did fight, right, of
• 58:37
  Speaker 2: course they fight, but like one one sibling tormented the other.
• 58:43
  Speaker 1: Oh, the boys like they're boys, they beat each other up.
• 58:46
  Speaker 2: This is like really torment each other, right, like one
• 58:49
  Speaker 2: boy tormented one girl like a law.
• 58:54
  Speaker 1: The boys and girls. The boys and girls don't fight
• 58:57
  Speaker 1: in my house.
• 58:57
  Speaker 2: That's all the fighting there is.
• 58:59
  Speaker 1: The boy. The boy is like at some point, like
• 59:02
  Speaker 1: the when they get to an age that the older
• 59:06
  Speaker 1: boy realizes that if you if you do this, the
• 59:08
  Speaker 1: younger boy like like completely loses it. And they'll like
• 59:12
  Speaker 1: they think they do that, but I think my two youngest,
• 59:16
  Speaker 1: my too youngest, never did that.
• 59:17
  Speaker 2: No, the boy girl fighting is what we have.
• 59:19
  Speaker 1: And I'll say this and I'll do this to ca
• 59:22
  Speaker 1: that my that I'll leave you with this. My wife's
• 59:24
  Speaker 1: always used to say, the best gift you can give
• 59:27
  Speaker 1: a child is a sibling.
• 59:29
  Speaker 3: Yeah, that's that's what I'm thinking.
• 59:31
  Speaker 2: That I I remember, I'm going to tell this one
• 59:35
  Speaker 2: story and then I promise that I'm done. This is
• 59:37
  Speaker 2: a problem hanging over podcast.
• 59:39
  Speaker 1: I know.
• 59:41
  Speaker 2: We planned to be done after we had our fifth
• 59:45
  Speaker 2: and we were like, this is it, We're done. We
• 59:46
  Speaker 2: didn't want to buy a new car, we didn't have
• 59:48
  Speaker 2: any firm in our house. We had all these very
• 59:49
  Speaker 2: logical reasons why we were done, and then we found
• 59:52
  Speaker 2: out we were pregnant like three days later, and so
• 59:56
  Speaker 2: we did. All the kids had also decided for all
• 1:00:00
  Speaker 2: these reasons, also we don't want it, like it's just
• 1:00:04
  Speaker 2: there's enough. Our house is crazy, there's enough, so loud,
• 1:00:09
  Speaker 2: and so we were really nervous to tell them that
• 1:00:12
  Speaker 2: we were pregnant with the sixth. And we had taped
• 1:00:17
  Speaker 2: telling them that we were pregnant with the fifth, and
• 1:00:19
  Speaker 2: I decided, I'm not going to do it. I'm not
• 1:00:21
  Speaker 2: going to tape it with the sixth because there's going
• 1:00:23
  Speaker 2: to be crying and bargaining and all these things whatever.
• 1:00:29
  Speaker 2: And we told them when we told them that we
• 1:00:31
  Speaker 2: were pregnant with the sixth, just absolute anarchy, screaming, throwing
• 1:00:38
  Speaker 2: things in the air like yeah, oh happiness, so happy.
• 1:00:45
  Speaker 2: And I looked at each other and we were like,
• 1:00:48
  Speaker 2: that was not what we were expecting at all. Because
• 1:00:51
  Speaker 2: every single person in the family had decided that we
• 1:00:54
  Speaker 2: should be done, and every all the kids all, I mean,
• 1:00:58
  Speaker 2: like the older four kids. The thing didn't know he
• 1:01:00
  Speaker 2: was so little, but the older four kids were like, yes, yes,
• 1:01:05
  Speaker 2: it's so excited. It was so beautiful, and like when
• 1:01:11
  Speaker 2: he when they found out he was a boy, it
• 1:01:13
  Speaker 2: was like wold And when he was born, it was
• 1:01:17
  Speaker 2: like they were waiting at the door, like because they
• 1:01:20
  Speaker 2: were in the house and they were waiting at the door,
• 1:01:23
  Speaker 2: and the second they heard him cry, they were like
• 1:01:25
  Speaker 2: the tap tap tap tap tap, And I was like,
• 1:01:27
  Speaker 2: I need four more minutes, guys, I haven't pushed out
• 1:01:30
  Speaker 2: the placent yet.
• 1:01:33
  Speaker 1: Yeah, very much, very much like okay, who gets the
• 1:01:36
  Speaker 1: old baby first? Who gets like and the girls like,
• 1:01:39
  Speaker 1: I mean totally like those.
• 1:01:42
  Speaker 2: The only reason I'm apprehensive right now is because if
• 1:01:44
  Speaker 2: I have two in two years, I know I'll end
• 1:01:46
  Speaker 2: up with ten and we only want two.
• 1:01:48
  Speaker 3: Three matchs.
• 1:01:50
  Speaker 4: But I'm twenty six. Like, if I have two by
• 1:01:54
  Speaker 4: the time i'm twenty seven, I love Yeah, it's.
• 1:01:57
  Speaker 1: I love me to say. Like, So we were in
• 1:02:00
  Speaker 1: our I guess I was forty one when we had
• 1:02:03
  Speaker 1: our youngest forty two forty two when we had our youngest,
• 1:02:06
  Speaker 1: and it's have your kids young, like it's much easier
• 1:02:10
  Speaker 1: having them when you're in your twenties and thirties. It's hard.
• 1:02:15
  Speaker 1: It's much harder in your forties.
• 1:02:17
  Speaker 4: My back hurt's now, so.
• 1:02:18
  Speaker 3: I couldn't imagine in twenty years.
• 1:02:22
  Speaker 2: But it's amazing.
• 1:02:23
  Speaker 1: Yeah yeah, And now the grandkids and my my younger
• 1:02:27
  Speaker 1: my younger boys are like love their nieces and nephews
• 1:02:31
  Speaker 1: and they they they dote on them. And my my
• 1:02:35
  Speaker 1: sudden law's grandmother just passed away yesterday, so she was
• 1:02:38
  Speaker 1: ninety five. But my in laws are visiting, so they
• 1:02:41
  Speaker 1: came over to sit with my son and watch the grandkids.
• 1:02:46
  Speaker 1: And my daughter's youngest is nine months old, and he
• 1:02:50
  Speaker 1: wouldn't like he would only let my twelve year old
• 1:02:52
  Speaker 1: put him to bed, like he wouldn't let my grandmother.
• 1:02:55
  Speaker 1: My mother in law like didn't come near him. So yeah,
• 1:02:59
  Speaker 1: he he he. They babysits and they we have built
• 1:03:03
  Speaker 1: the built at babysitters so we don't have to we
• 1:03:05
  Speaker 1: don't have to wipe about it. My daughter doesn't have
• 1:03:07
  Speaker 1: to wipe aout. Babysitters as around to happy the babysit.
• 1:03:11
  Speaker 2: So now you're influencing about having grandchildren. I love it.
• 1:03:14
  Speaker 2: The cycle continues.
• 1:03:16
  Speaker 1: The greatest of the world. I love my kids, but
• 1:03:18
  Speaker 1: there's nothing, nothing compared to grandkids because you could send
• 1:03:22
  Speaker 1: them home whenever you want.
• 1:03:23
  Speaker 2: That's day I'm speaking of, which I do really should
• 1:03:27
  Speaker 2: go because they're all awake.
• 1:03:29
  Speaker 3: I think.
• 1:03:31
  Speaker 2: It's like nine forty five. Thank you so much, Evan,
• 1:03:36
  Speaker 2: I really really appreciate you waking up up the set.
• 1:03:39
  Speaker 2: I will send my love to him for sure. Thank
• 1:03:42
  Speaker 2: you to everyone who listens tonight today. Whenever you're listening
• 1:03:45
  Speaker 2: to this, subscribe on Apple Podcasts and Spotify and all
• 1:03:49
  Speaker 2: your podcast apps of choice. And don't forget to subscribe
• 1:03:53
  Speaker 2: to our sub sec because that's how we play at
• 1:03:55
  Speaker 2: the bills and until next week. And follow the mom
• 1:03:59
  Speaker 2: wars on Twitter yeah and Instagram too.
• 1:04:02
  Speaker 4: Yeah, Devin, Yeah, I haven't.
• 1:04:05
  Speaker 2: Yeah, there you go. Settle up, y'all.
• 1:04:11
  Speaker 1: Ricochet joined the conversation.